#a lot of this is also stuff i wanted to write in my school project about newgrounds that i had to cut out SO SADDD.
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animutate · 7 months ago
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please be autistic about picos school in paragraphs!! i need to learn more but i dont wanna do a bunch of research 😞
OK OK. im going to take this as an opportunity to explain it all like im talking to someone who has no idea what it is. big wall of text ahead.
picos school is a 1999 flash game by tom fulp created for and distributed on his website newgrounds.com. it was created as apart of a series of games on newgrounds parodying childrens pc edutainment games of the time, but that part was kind of dropped for pico which is sad because i really enjoy it. pico is also heavily inspired by the columbine highshool massacre as it was released just 3 months after it occurred and like the media surrounding it as well as hate mail newgrounds was getting blaming it and all violent video games for causing real world violence like columbine. before that picos game was originally going to be about whatever this mockup means. shitting outside a church.
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also interesting is an email sent to tom prior to the creation of picos school by someone who apparently knew eric harris.
the plot is about a 13 year old goth canonically transfem evil shapeshifting alien wannabe dictator named cassandra along with a group of violence obsessed posers shooting up your school as the first step in taking over the world. you play as pico and its up to you to kill them all and like save the school. its basically about every stereotype or misconception about columbine you can think of kmfdm is even namedropped at the beginning. now that i think about it love conquers all the 2021 april fools version of the game where everyone is gay and cassandra doesnt go through with the shooting and they talk it all out goes with the "one of them was the evil one and one of them was just a follower" narrative unintentionally with hanzou.
theres a lot to be said about the insensitivity of picos school especially with how it used a real recent at the time school shooting for shock value and especially with the character nene which is like a WHOLE other thing im not getting into namely because im not asian so its only really my place to speak on it. but pico is very very bad and calling it "a product of its time" really minimizes any issues it has and you can be a fan and still recognize that there are a lot of problems with it.
picos was really controversial for the time to the point that picos school got one million page views in 1999 which is CRAZY for an independent website in the 1990s. i am of the opinion that the popularity of picos school is what really got newgrounds out there and why its still around today and also why it survived the dot com bubble crash in 2000. but i dont have any evidence for that.
pico to me is really like... a cultural icon of the early internet. he captures the attitude and the feeling of early newgrounds so well its something i really love about him. he is the perfect embodiment of the late 90s angsty teenage computer geek. i also like how open source pico the character feels as in how tom fulp said he is "the peoples character to do whatever you want with". he has a personality and set traits but he really is whatever you want him to be and what people wanted him to be is a cool matrix style angsty teenage assassin and i think thats so fun!!! i love that pico is a reflection of the average newgrounds user at whatever given time. i love pico a lot he means a lot to me as like my biggest special interest going on 4 years hes gotten me through a lot. pico is so special to me despite everything wrong with picos school I DONT CARE.
anyway this is getting long idk where im going with this or if anything i said really makes sense. i just really love talking about picos school i love pico
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friendlysailor · 1 year ago
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Ahoy!
I'm currently sailing the oh so rough seas that is exam time, so I'm going to be away for a bit longer. I just once again have to express how happy I am every time i see interactions with this blog, even though I've been very inactive recently. It really has helped strengthen and keep up my resolve in wanting to help make digital privacy, piracy and computer knowledge more accessible for as many as I can. So again, a big THANK YOU to you all for being here!
I've been considering if there would be any interest in me trying to create a more in-depth resource for finding ways to improve your quality of live when using computers and the like?
While my first thought was a simple list, I know that those can get overwhelming really quick. So I've been playing around with the idea of a "clippy"-like addon to the blog that can offer you directions to common issues (such as, "How do i remove the 'search on the web' results on Windows 10?", "What browser-addons should I have?" and "How to speed up YouTube on FireFox?"). I think I would also want to have it be accessible through a GitHub-page, so that mobile-users also could easily access it, and so you all have other options than to only have it accessed through a Tumblr blog.
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eyivibyemi · 2 years ago
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✧ I won’t really write descriptions for these, but see original post tags for explanation/commentary on the song snippet ✧
#I actually like the background piano of this more than I like the weird singing improvised over it#probably just because it was vaguely cool to clank out something that even vaguely sounds like maybe an actual chord#that might exist or something despite - again- having so little clue about the piano or how to read music that I could#not even point out like what the names of the notes are or etc. ghghjbj#Which is still funny because if you improvise something and also have no idea how to read or identify musical notes then you will#never be able to play it again because you couldn't identify how to lol. THAT'S WHY I LIKE singing!!! I could hear any tune once and on the#spot repeat it back exactly as long as it's within the range of noises I am physically capable of producing#But with tangible insturments it's like... you have to memorize.. the names of things. or where to put your hands. or#be able to name and recognize something and keep that in your head. Whereas voice noises just come instinctually and naturally#I do think I could probably learn an instrument if I really tried but I guess the thing is just like.. I already have 4724867289 other hobb#es that I am trying to split my time between that I barely have enough energy to dedicate to all of them and hardly make#progress at any of them because I'm spread so thin jumping back and forth between them. should i REALLY pick up another???#one thats going to take years and years and lots of practice?? It's kind of like learning languages. I REALLY want to learn some other#languages and I'm not like terrible at it from times that I've started to beofre in school and stuff. but it's just like.. do I really have#the TIME?? I think I need a logical justification to warrant a certain level of investment like.. if I knew for certain that in a year I'd#be moving to france then of course I could dedicate many hours to learning french because now it's necessary and despite#all of my other projects that I have going on I need to make time for it. But if I'm just learning it for the sake of doing it? then??#why should I not simply dedicate that same amount of time to my writing or my sculptures or something else? etc?? Like if I for some reason#was talked into starting a band with one of my friends or something then yeah maybe I'd learn an instrument but. I just see no#practical need to or way to justify the time investment when I currently have so many other things going on and music is my silly hobby lol#ANYWAY.. all that to say. BECAUSE I have no clue what I'm doing and likely never will. then even when I do the most basic#boring sounding bit of barely passable zero skill hardly capable piano plonking or something I'm always like#wowww. wow. I did something. wow. music is so magical. peace and love on planet earth. hhbjhbjhb#ANYWAY.. so I like the background more than the singing but. eh. still sounds a little fantasy elf choir-esque#bantasy tag
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omegamoo · 2 years ago
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i have lots of. thoughts about like why the wp as a project has turned out the way it has and lots of those thoughts are really good sweet ones about community and then lots of frustrations too i think
#ramblings#not gonna get super into it i don’t think#but i think the good stuff is really good#like it’s been absolutely bonkers amazing to get to see so many people#participate in making something so dear to them yk?#like we each brought a piece of ourselves to this and wove it in#in ways that are so intrinsic to the project that you can’t get them out#and then. i’m frustrated too#because of high school drama and how that splintered stuff#but also like. failure to communicate between parties waxing and waning interest#stepping on each others toes without regards#what ‘ownership’ over the project looks like and should look like#like i still want to write it. i feel like i am still writing it!#i want to do everything in my power to make it come true#but how much of that gets conveyed? how much of my narrative power#and power over decisions did i lose due to initial anxiety about getting in the way?#and then again. failure on all ends to really properly communicate what we were looking for#leaad to lots of varied conflicting and overlapping arcs that were never fully understood#n now some ppl r showing interest in writing it again which is GREAT! hi guys!!!#however i feel bad i guess? because we’ve spent time quite literally reworking all kinds of things#to make it fit because people stopped seeming to care?#so how do you say hey yeah ur character well i’ve just gone and developed them#and i want to give everyone the space to write because i want to hear everyone’s ideas and that really matters to me#and i don’t want my friends to see the finished project and be like hey wtf#this isn’t right#but like. hurgh#ANYWAYS SORRY#whittled pantheon#i love wp community. i miss thé wp community#‘not gonna get super into it’ GETS INRO IT
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galactic-magick · 29 days ago
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The Handsome Assistant: Viktor x Reader
Summary: You keep running into the handsome Dean's assistant, whom you find you have a lot in common with. You develop quite the crush, and things get a little messy when your friends find out about him.
Words: 3.2k
Warnings: some implied suggestive stuff, alcohol use
Author's Notes: Set before Season 1 Act 1. Just a warning, this is probably the most heavily self-indulgent of my Viktor fics so far. I’ve had ideas bouncing around my head for a long time about who I’d be if I lived in the Arcane universe, and I eventually just ended up taking inspiration from what I do in real life. So basically Reader works in human services and is similar to a social worker. I tried my best to write it in a way that makes sense even if you’re not familiar with that field.
Also, the roommate/friend characters are based on my besties irl, one of which is also my beloved tumblr mutual @ohboi , who has been dealing with my nonstop Viktor obsession for a long ass time now so shout-out to them lol. I wrote you living your dream in this fic as a way to apologize <3
-
It’s exhausting dealing with the powers of topside. There’s no sense of urgency here, no drive for real progress. You’ve attended meeting after meeting, maintaining composure every time they tell you your mission isn’t a priority, or that it will take decades to implement.
All you want is to help the struggling children in the Undercity. It’s what you’ve dedicated your life to, studying human services and psychology at the Academy and building your own grassroots group with a few others from your graduating class. You primarily advocate for better education, as the schools down there barely get any funding. The council doesn’t want to hear it, though, as it’s much easier to forget about the citizens below their feet.
It frustrates you beyond belief, especially since the first chunk of your life was spent in the Undercity. You lived the stark contrast between the two cities yourself, being granted countless more opportunities once your family moved to Piltover. It was sickening, and you felt so guilty with your new privileges when your friends back home still had none. But without those privileges, you wouldn’t have been able to attend the Academy and give back.
You resist the strong urge to scream after another failed proposal with the council. You prepared all of your points for weeks, fact-checking everything and making sure your ideas were plausible. The budget and statistics you wrote out projected exponential progress for both cities, as focusing on the new generation of Zaunites would encourage the next great minds and likely lead to collaboration on mutual issues. But of course, the council is not ready to contemplate such a future.
There was one factor that wasn’t usually there, though, a handsome young man sitting beside Professor Heimerdinger. He was furiously taking notes the entire meeting, looking back down at his journal anytime you made eye contact with him. Out of all the councilors, Heimerdinger seemed the most open to your ideas, but without a majority agreeing to cast a vote to actually change policy, nothing would happen.
You walk back down the long hallway, noticing someone in your peripheral vision.
“I’m sorry the council remains so stuck in their ways,” he says. “Trust me, I understand how hard it is to hold back your anger towards them.”
You turn your head, seeing the young man from earlier, “Who are you?”
“Viktor. I’m assistant to the Dean of the Academy,” he replies, leaning on a cane. “I quite liked your ideas. I think they could work.”
“I know they would work.”
You sigh, quickly realizing you’re projecting your feelings onto this stranger.
“Sorry,” you correct yourself. “I just don’t understand how they can just not care about the suffering down there. I’m from the Undercity, I’ve seen what’s happening there firsthand, and it’s only getting worse.”
Viktor’s eyes widen a bit, “I’m from the Undercity, too.”
“You’re from the Undercity and you’re the personal assistant to Heimerdinger?” you question, a bit shocked at the prospect.
“It’s really not that big of a deal, but yes.”
“What do you mean, not a big deal? I’ve never even met anyone else from the Undercity who got into the Academy.”
“I suppose we are a rare breed,” he says. “I imagine I never saw you there due to our differences in studies.”
“Most likely,” you shrug. “None of my classes were in the science halls, assuming that’s where you were.”
He smirks, “What makes you assume I studied science?”
“You just have that look about you.”
He laughs, “Well, you’re right. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised someone well-versed in analyzing humanity read me so quickly.”
“Don’t worry, you’re still mostly a mystery to me. I can’t read minds or anything,” you flash him a genuine smile.
There’s a beat of silence before he speaks again.
“I need to get back to my lab, but I do hope we cross paths again. I’ll certainly discuss your proposals more with Heimerdinger as well.”
“I’d appreciate that.”
He leaves in the opposite direction, his cane tapping the floor.
What an interesting twist of fate, meeting someone like you.
-
The second time you run into Viktor is at an Academy party a couple months later, something you both likely would’ve skipped if you could. It’s somewhat a recruiting event for new students, and several alumni were asked to represent their fields of study. It’s not that you mind talking with prospective students, but you know you’ll have to hold back a lot of your true opinions when doing so. If you go off about how the curriculum doesn’t cover enough about the issues in the Undercity, you’ll surely get a reprimand from your former professors. You could lose several connections and investors in your organization as well, something you’re not willing to risk. Instead, you keep a smile on your face, engaging in conversation politely and answering questions.
You notice Viktor sitting at one of the far tables, his eyes darting around the room. He has several contraptions set up, and occasionally people come up to ask him about them. He lights up when he speaks, his face making the cutest expressions.
You notice yourself staring, quickly turning your head towards something else.
That sconce on the wall looks nice, doesn’t it?
As the event slows down and the crowd shuffles out, you pack up your things and head to the door, glancing back at Viktor’s table for a moment. He’s looking right back at you, and your heels swivel promptly to go see him.
“Hey,” you say, shooting him a smile. “Nice to see you again.”
Shit, was he this handsome the first time you met him?
“You as well,” he nods, gathering up his own things scattered in front of him. “Did you find anyone to join your program?”
“A few, yeah. You?”
“Several. More than I expected.”
He huffs, soon realizing all of his tech and science displays were not going to fit in the one cart that was left.
“I can help you carry your stuff, the science wing isn’t that far from here, right?” you offer, shifting your things under one arm and grabbing some of his things with the other.
“You don’t have to do that,” he protests, but you’re already propping open the door and gesturing him to come along with a head tilt.
“I really don’t mind. Come on.”
You help him put things away in the different classrooms and offices, careful not to break anything. You’ve never been in this side of the school before, and it’s set up quite differently than the usual classrooms you were in. There’s much more going on than a usual lecture hall, tools and chemicals you don’t dare touch lining the perimeter. Viktor thanks you for your assistance as you finish getting everything in place, and you once again prepare to go your separate ways.
“Wait—” he says before you leave, pulling out his journal and flipping through it. “I wrote down a lot more notes that might be helpful for your project, I’ve been thinking about it a lot.”
He hands over the open page for you to read, and your jaw drops. It’s so detailed, every proposal you had broken down to its smallest pieces. He even laid out the budget and resource use and everything it would take to not only build and fund better schools in the Undercity, but also work on housing and overall infrastructure. He even has some theories scribbled on how to keep the air cleaner and fix problems with the fissures.
You can’t believe he’s been thinking about you and everything you said for all this time since you last met.
“Viktor, this is amazing.”
“I know it still may not convince the entire council, but I found your ideas quite inspiring. I hope my calculations can be informative.”
“They certainly are,” your fingers hover over the written words and numbers. “Thank you, Viktor.”
“Of course,” he grins. “I look forward to seeing what you accomplish.”
-
You find yourself running into him a lot more often after that, “accidentally” walking by each other’s offices at least once a week and talking long beyond what you probably should while working. Your soul feels so in tune with his, a phenomenon that surely shouldn’t be happening with someone you haven’t known very long.
Your conversations quickly progress to topics non-work related, his curiosity blooming with every little thing you share with him. Most days after work you simply can’t stop talking to each other, causing you to get home later and later until your roommates start to get nosy.
“I really have to go, Viktor,” you laugh, glancing at the clock that reads three whole hours past the end of your shift. You’ve been chatting about embarrassing Academy stories, reminiscing on both the stark similarities and differences between your experiences.
His eyebrows raise. “Shit, is it really that late?”
“Yeah,” you grab your bag with a sigh. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Of course.”
-
“You already work too much overtime as it is! What’s so important that you have to stay late every single day?” one of your roommates, Eli, probes, clearly unsatisfied with the half-truth answers you’ve given so far. You don’t really want to tell the full truth just yet, that you’ve been talking with the most gorgeous man you’ve ever seen, and you don’t experience the passage of time whatsoever when you’re around him. That would sound ridiculous, especially since absolutely nothing will ever come of it. He’s a wonderful colleague, but you’d be foolish to ever expect anything more.
“There’s just a lot to do,” you finally say.
“You need a break, that’s what you need to do,” they emphasize. “How about we go down to The Last Drop tomorrow night? It’s been a while since we’ve seen our friends down there.”
You nod, “Alright, I’ll try not to stay late tomorrow.”
“You better not.”
They glare at you jokingly, and you let out a laugh and exhale of relief.
-
You finish up your notes for the day, whipping your head back and forth to check if the coast is clear. You know yourself and your own weakness—you certainly won’t get out of here on time if you run into Viktor for even a second.
But of course, like clockwork, his familiar tap on your leg with his cane greets you moments later, your heart fluttering to a discomposing degree. Him coming to see you is a routine now, and despite your promise to your friends you are aching to talk to him. You haven’t had a proper night out in months, why is it so hard to just leave?
If any of your racing thoughts are visible on your features, Viktor certainly picked up on them.
“Are you alright?”
“Yeah, just...long day,” you reply. “But my roommates are taking me out tonight, maybe that will wake me back up.”
“I won’t keep you long, then—”
He’s cut off by Eli calling your name, jaw dropped as they come towards you down the hallway.
“I knew there was something you weren’t telling me!” they chuckle in disbelief. “Working late my ass.”
“I was literally on my way home!”
“I just wanted to come check!”
Your face grows hot. It isn’t abnormal for your roommates to visit you at your job every so often, bringing you important documents you forgot at home or bringing you a treat on your birthday, but under the current circumstances you’re a bit mortified.
They reach out their hand, “I’m Eli, Y/N’s roommate. Who do you think you are?”
“Viktor.” he shakes it, surprisingly not appearing phased by their directness.
“Interesting,” they look him up and down, then turn to you. “So, he’s coming with us, right?”
“Oh, um...I didn’t ask—“
Viktor can’t help but smile at your flustered face.
“If I’m invited, I wouldn’t mind joining.”
-
“I can’t believe you.”
Mumbling under your breath, you enter The Last Drop. Viktor told you he’d meet you there in about an hour, which thankfully gives you some time for some drinks to numb your nerves.
“Look, I honestly don’t know why you didn’t just tell us about him. He seems like a good one.”
“It’s not like that,” you correct them. “He’s not into me like that. We just work on some projects together, that’s all.”
You order a drink from Vander at the bar, gulping it down a little too quickly.
“That kinda night, eh?” he laughs, pouring you another one before you have to ask.
“Yeah.”
You have a few more drinks and shots with your roommates and old Undercity friends, your mind and body entering such a daze that you almost forget Viktor is meeting you there later. You play games together and get teased about some of your adopted topside ways, and you even get back at Eli by pushing them to talk to Sevika, who they ogle at quite literally every time you come to this bar with them. It’s the kind of night where you can be free and careless, temporarily leaving your problems behind in favor of bad decisions.
You have to do a double take when you finally see Viktor arrive. He’s changed out of his Academy uniform, now dressed much more casually and much more like a Zaunite.
“It seems I’m a little late to the fun,” he observes.
“We’re just starting!” you beam, the drunk giggles taking over you.
“How many have you had?”
“I don’t know, like 7 or 8 maybe,” you shrug.
He lifts his cane against you and steers you away from the bar, shaking his head, “I think you’re done for tonight.”
“Fine,” you roll your eyes. “But not because you told me to, because I don’t want to throw up.”
He stays close to you while you stumble back to your friends’ table, chuckling at the slurred introductions you give him. They all accept him into their games and conversations instantly, and you quickly find out Viktor can handle his liquor a lot better than you. He puts all of them to shame, and they love finally having decent competition.
Your friends all whisper their approval to you throughout the night, even though you’ve repeatedly reminded them that nothing is going on. Although, you’re not really helping your case by zoning out every few minutes on his face.
“You have pretty eyes,” you say, staring until you realize what you just said out loud.
“That’s very kind,” he responds hesitantly. “But I’m sure your vision is a bit...tainted.”
“Alcohol doesn’t change color perception, dumbass.” you retort. “Besides, I’m sobering up a little.”
“Well then,” he smiles. “Thank you.”
You sigh, taking a sip of some water and glancing around the room. The bar is close to closing, and most of your friends have left.
“Have you seen Eli recently? I haven’t seen them in a while.”
He snickers, “You didn’t see them go in the back with Sevika?”
“They what?” you jump out of your seat. “Oh they’d better tell me everything.”
“I’m sure they will,” he laughs. “Do you need someone to walk you home, then?”
“Probably. Who knows how long they’ll be.”
-
The buzz has worn off quite a bit now, so thankfully you’re not tripping all over nothing and further embarrassing yourself. Viktor’s beautiful glow in the moonlight is more than enough to accomplish that, your gazes prolonging far longer than they should.
“Thank you for coming tonight, it was fun,” you say, fumbling for your apartment key in your pocket. “I’m sorry you had to see me like that, though.”
“Don’t apologize. It was very amusing.”
“Good.” you exhale. “Just ignore anything weird I said, okay?”
“I’m not sure that’s possible,” he smirks. “Now get some sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
-
Sleep is certainly what you get, and the next morning before work is full of a head-pounding hangover and chaotic conversation. Your roommates Eli and Chanthou can’t stop laughing about everything that happened, and naturally you’re very nosy about the Sevika situation. Eli tells you every little detail of course, giddy and in disbelief that they managed to make-out with her all night.
“So? Are you guys going to get together again?” you ask on the edge of your seat.
“I hope so.”
“Looks like you both got what you wanted last night,” Chanthou adds.
“Guys, he just walked me home. That’s all.” You’re getting a little annoyed with the constant reminders that your little crush is not, in fact, reciprocated.
“You...don’t remember?” she looks at Eli, then cocks her head at you. “About halfway through the night you were all over him. We just assumed you guys finally confessed.”
You didn’t think you drank enough to blackout, but you definitely don’t remember whatever they’re talking about. Besides, if you really were doing that, why didn’t Viktor say something once you were sobered up?
And what, now you have to see him in the office today, having no idea what you said to him?
“Oh, fuck, guys. What exactly did I do?”
“I don’t know what happened after I went back with Sevika, but before I left you were sitting on his lap on the couch and playing with his hair—”
“WHAT?”
“Wow, you really don’t remember, do you?”
You groan, wishing you didn’t have to go in today. You have a couple important meetings though, so you’ll have to power through. You take some painkillers and grab your things, praying for the first time that you can get through the day without seeing Viktor.
-
Your headache refuses to lessen its throbbing for your entire shift, making the work you usually enjoy completely miserable. You snap at one too many co-workers and find yourself staring at the clock desperately. Why did you agree to drinking on a weeknight again?
Just as you dreaded, you run into Viktor outside, too obviously waiting for you to pretend to ignore him.
“Hey…” you avoid looking into his eyes. “How come you didn’t say anything about what really happened last night?”
“I...wasn’t sure you’d remember,” he confesses. “I suspected you blacked out when you said you didn’t remember seeing Eli leave. And I wasn’t sure you meant what you said anyway.”
“Please, Viktor. Just tell me what I said. All my roommates told me was I couldn’t stop touching you, which I am so sorry about—“
“N-No, don’t be. Everything was consensual, I assure you.” his face flushes. “You just told me you have feelings for me, that’s all. I was going to tell you last night too if you hadn’t said it first.”
Your eyes widen at his words, your heart threatening to leave your chest.
“But it seems you don’t remember, so I can still count this as making the first move, hmm?”
Shivers race down your spine as Viktor leans in, his fingertips grazing your cheek. His lips meet yours softly, your eyes fluttering shut as he presses deeper. His hand remains holding your face when he pulls away, scanning your expression for your reaction.
“I guess the feeling is mutual,” you chuckle, still a bit breathless.
“Quite so, darling.”
-
More Author's Notes: I have a bad habit of getting drunk around guys I like irl bc I literally can’t handle being around hot people sober so that's the inspiration for that situation lol. Also, a part 2 to this is already in the works, it'll be set during Act 1 and probably parts between 1 and 2.
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celestie0 · 2 months ago
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hi my friends! hope you're all doing well. just wanted to come on here and share a little updates w you guys (if you're still here lol)
i guess it's been like a month n a half since i formally went on hiatus, and it's been nice! i got kinda sick for a little bit lmfaooo which was tough to manage w school, but i'm better now
although i took time away from my blog, i still delved in writing here n there. i haven't written anything for kickoff since tbh i'm in such a slump w it. but i still have big plans for stuff that happens after ch13, so hopefully i can just push through this next chapter and get to a better place. thanks so much to anyone that is still interested in the story, it means a lot to me. i know i'm so slow w updates and the story has been going on for almost a year now, but the continued support is so sweet! even though i didn't work on writing it these past one n a half months, i still really love it and plan to finish it.
i'm not sure if many people remember that i had this sort of "apocalypse" gojo x reader au about an asteroid being set to hit the earth in three days, and reader n gojo are ex lovers n the impending end of the world makes them break no-contact...yeah i finished writing the first chapter for it and i really love it so far! it's like set in new york which is really fun haha i love stories where new york is kind of its own "character" if that makes sense...it will definitely be a limited series w only 4 chapters or so, but i kinda wanna finish all 4 chapters before i start posting it bc i don't want it to be a drawn out series in terms of posting since i think it'd be best enjoyed in frequent succession if that makes sense
as for ihm, i think i wrote the most for ihm during my hiatus. i finished three chapters for it, but they are shorter chapters (around 3-4k words). i kinda realized one of my biggest reasons for burnout w my fics were the reaaaaallly long chapters...like didn't i have a 22k chapter for kickoff or sumn lol. idk i can't remember. but anyways, yeah the mindset behind the longer chapters was bc i liked each chapter to kinda have its own conflict, build up, tension then resolution in a sense. but it was exhausting to write that way tbh lol. so i think moving forward, for ihm, i will have shorter chapters. i just don't wanna think to much about things anymore, and write from my heart, bc i have a lot of things planned for ihm, and among the criticism i've received for my writing choices vs my own vision for the story, i've realized during my hiatus that the only way i can finish ihm, or any of my storeis for that matter, is if i just.........stop giving a fuck about it. lol idk if that sounds strange to say, but like, i don't want to over-edit anything. i don't want to think too much about redundancy. i don't want to flower things up or cut stuff out. i'm at the point where imma just write a first draft, check for grammarly errors, and then post it. i guess the reason i'm sharing this is because idk if this means that people may enjoy my writing less since i will admittedly be spending much less time on it than i did before, but tbh i realized i find the most joy while i'm writing, and not while i'm editing. so i want to spend as little time on the latter as possible, and if that changes the quality of my work, then so be it.
anyways, hmm as for hiatus. i guess i'm off hiatus now? i really enjoyed being off of tumblr tbh this app has a lot of questionable content at times (esp in jjk community) and it also did wonders for my studying bc i wasn't spending time doomscrolling or shit posting anymore lmfaooo. but as for writing in particular, i think i will start to post ihm again exclusively. i can't say anything about kickoff or my other projects, but i feel comfortable to start posting ihm again.
sorry, i know that i have kept my replies and ask box off for a long time. but i will open them again once i start posting chapters because i really miss interacting with you guys.
anywho, these are my updates lol i'm like not sure how many of my readers are still here or which ones have moved on but that's ok, i'm grateful to anyone n everyone. hope to see you all soon again!
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haru-dipthong · 2 months ago
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Fansub Release + Analysis of Utena Ep 14
This is a big one!!
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My fansub release posts aren't usually like this, but this episode is so jam packed with stuff I want to talk about that I had to write my translation notes as a series of essays. It's longer than usual so strap in!
First, a word on “The Mikage Seminar”
I’ve always found the translation “the Mikage Seminar” very strange. In English, a seminar is an event — a lecture. Yet “the Mikage Seminar” is discussed as though it’s not a recurring lecture, but a society or a school of therapy, or a cult (like scientology). In fact I did a bit of reading about scientology to try and find an alternative translation, and discovered that the origins of scientology, namely a set of ideas and practices called Dianetics, bears a lot of similarities to “the Mikage Seminar”. Both involve a type of therapy where one person looks into their mind and talks to an “auditor”.
The auditor coaxes the preclear to recall as much as possible. — Wikipedia
This in particular stood out to me! Mikage often says 「深く。もっと深く」 during his interviews (”Deeper. Dig deeper.”).
The Japanese word ゼミナール doesn’t actually come from the English “seminar” but the German “Seminar” (capitalised). According to Wikipedia, in Germany, and often in Japan, Seminar/ゼミナール is used to refer to a university course that includes a thesis project. So ゼミナール refers to a course of learning, rather than a talk or lecture. And it would make a lot of sense to call a system like Dianetics a “course”. Almost like a “course” of medicine — a “course” of psychological practices that you can join but never complete.
So it would make sense to translate it as “the Mikage Course”. But “course” has more meanings in English than just this, and in the context of a university this makes it sound more like a mundane teaching course. So I tried some other words: the Mikage Sessions, the Mikage Method, Mikage Psychotherapy, Mikage Therapy, the Mikage Movement. None seemed quite right. Until I remembered this post. ゼミナール is a foreign word in Japanese, why not find a foreign word for the translation? And so I settled on this:
The Mikage Seminarium, AKA The Society of the Black Rose…
Seminarium is Latin, and is where both the German and English derive seminar from. Its original meaning is “seed plot”, but it’s also just the Polish word for seminar. I really like how the Latin makes its meaning ambiguous — it kind of sounds like a location, kind of sounds like a society, and kind of sounds like a learning course. Because it is all of these things.
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Anthy: では、香苗さん。失礼します。 Kanae: ね、あたしの事、お姉さんって呼んでいいのよ。もうすぐわたしはあなたの本当のお姉さんになるんだから。
A more literal translation:
Anthy: Thank you for having us, Kanae-san. Kanae: Please… you can just call me “sister”. I’m going to be your real sister soon enough anyway.
The translation I ended up going with:
Anthy: Thank you for having us, Miss Ohtori. Kanae: Please... you can just call me Kanae. We're going to be family soon. There's no need for the formalities.
Japanese honorifics strike again!
In English, sisters-in-law don’t ask to be called “sister”. That would be super weird in most scenarios, and this scene is trying to evoke a particular familiar feeling of closing a distance gap in a relationship. The audience is meant to relate. Changing how Anthy addresses Kanae was pivotal to this scene working properly.
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わかりました。あなたは世界を革命するしかないでしょ。
I understand. Your only choice is to force the world to change around you.
This line is translated as “Your only choice is to revolutionise the world” by basically every other translation. The reason is clear — the Japanese is the same as when Utena pulls the sword out of Anthy, or when any of the other characters talk about “revolutionising the world”. However, in this context, I don’t like it. The nuance of the English phrase is quite different to the Japanese phrase. In English, it’s often used to describe new commercial products: “This new device will revolutionise the world!” It comes with an implied “for the better”, but has used to describe technological developments so unexciting that it can also feel hollow. When the student council talk of revolutionising the world, they sound like revolutionaries — the context makes it work. But in this context, it comes out of nowhere and doesn’t have any of that fervour, which makes it sound hollow and flaccid when it should sound sinister and manipulative.
I think a pervading throughline for all the Black Rose duelists is that they see their problems as caused by other people, with themselves being blameless. Rather than change how they approach their situation, Mikage tells them they’re in the right.
Your behaviour will set you down a path. If that path leads to your goals, well done! However, if your path does not lead to your goals, there’s only two ways you can achieve them.
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The first is to change your behaviour so that it does align with your goals. The second, impossible way, is for the rest of the world to change such that your current path DOES end up leading to your goals. This second way is not possible in the real world. But it is possible in Utena.
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Also I’ll just leave this here: “around you” → “revolve” → “revolution” 👀
Kanae tried to build a relationship with Anthy in a passive, non-confrontational, extremely Japanese way — the way she has been taught to behave, the “proper” way, a mechanical following of the social scripts. We don’t see a lot of their relationship, but the way she behaved and spoke of behaving towards Anthy is very very similar to the way my Japanese grandmother has behaved towards my and my brother’s partners.
It was unthinkable to her to change this pattern of behaviour. Her only choice was to change Anthy, change the rest of the world, so that her behaviour would lead to the outcomes she wants. You could describe this forceful bending of reality to be “revolutionising the world”.
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この黒薔薇のある限り、私はこれから嘘の私を演じなくて住む。
As long as I have this Black Rose, I'm free from the lie I was living before.
Besides gender, growing up, and resisting change (which exist as separate themes but also all intertwine as one), another major theme present in Utena is the self and subjective reality. The self is explored within those first major three themes, but also in terms of how the self dictates reality with the Black Rose duellists.
Black Rose Kanae says that her past self was a lie.
It reminds me of all the times when I’ve been going through a personal trial and I’ve looked back on my past self and thought “How naive I was. I understand things better now.” And then after a while I realise I was wrong, and my first self was more right. And then later still, maybe I re-realise that the second self was more right! And so on! The reality of truth (or to use Kanae’s language, “lies”) is so subjective.
Who dictates knowledge production? Who decides what is true; what is valid knowledge? This is a question of sociology - and at the moment that answer is "science does, kinda". But science and academic systems are supported by capitalist structures and tainted by capitalistic incentives — needing to be published in a journal, issues of replicability, the barrier to entry into academia in the first place, etc, etc. In the future we may find our current way of organising knowledge to be archaic and primitive in the same way we look back at medieval scholars.
But what about organising self-knowledge? Knowledge where the only one who can really decide what is true is yourself. And the only one that can decide what yourself even IS is yourself. I feel like I have looked back on my old ways of conceptualising myself many times (not even counting the gender-based revelations) and thought it primitive and archaic, and NOW I truly understand who I am and how to think of myself and how my thoughts interact with my other thoughts. But I have no doubt that I’ll look back on this current self of mine and reject their way of thinking too.
After their heart is replaced by the Black Rose, the duellists themselves frame this change as a moment of self realisation, of clarity. Once the rose is inside them, they wake up from themselves, like I have countless times. Kanae says herself, “This is the true me.” Honestly, I don’t doubt it. I think that version of Kanae was her true self at that moment, given the things influencing her. Being brainwashed doesn’t make you less of a person, or less yourself. It just makes you organise your reality differently.
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心を凍結させて作っただけの間に合わせのデュエリストでは、彼女は破れないな。
We won't be able to defeat her by simply freezing someone's heart and forcing them to duel.
Anya and I discussed this in depth. I originally translated 心 as “mind”, because that was the first thing that popped into my head and I thought that was the simple part of the translation. However, Anya pointed out that it didn’t make sense with the themes of self and subjective reality, and I strongly agreed, so I changed it to “heart” instead.
Anya suggested “conscious mind” instead of “heart” but I think heart is more accurate. 心 (kokoro) can mean heart or mind in Japanese (I find it interesting that those two things are portrayed as opposites in English), and that kanji is found in the word for biological heart, 心臓 (shinzou). When they say of the Black Rose "This is your new heart" they use 心臓. They also say "Your new 命 (life/lifeforce)" which I translated as soul since it sounded more hardcore and because "your new life" is a set phrase in English meaning a new chapter in your life rather than your life force. I think the idea is that they're freezing the duellists' ability to love and feel empathy, which in my opinion is necessary for them to commit to the unbelievably selfish act of revolutionising/reconstructing/bending the entire structure of the world for their own convenience.
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A very special thanks to @dontbe-lasanya for being there to talk through all these themes and ideas. I'm incredibly proud of this episode's translation and I wouldn't have been able to do it without them.
If you want to see more analysis like this, let me know! And also follow this blog to see episodes of the fansub as they're released. You can find all episodes released so far here:
Rose divider taken from this post
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charmedbystars · 2 years ago
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can u do a fanfic for e-42 miles based on Super Shy by Newjeans 🙏🏽 the song is like REALLYY CUTE AND I CANT STOP LISTENING TO IT 😣😣
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e-42 miles x shy reader
summary: y/n's mind is constantly processing on how to not be awkward around miles.
content: no warnings!
a/n: both of these asks were similar so i just decided to make it into one! these requests r so sweet. thank u anon🥹🥹. also I AGREE SUPER SHY BY NEW JEANS IS SO ADDICTIVE AND THE CHOREO IS SO CUTE!!
sitting with your friends at lunch, you peeked over your shoulder to take a look at the cute boy standing with his friends. nobody knew how badly the girl wanted to make a move and claim him as hers, but there was no way of that happening. 
you were fairly new to brooklyn and visions academy. you’ve been there for a couple months and settled in fine. on your first day of school, some girl approached you and invited you to sit with her and her friends at lunch. you weren’t the most outgoing person, so you were glad that someone reached out before you had to. 
“so y/n, do you think anyone is cute at this school?” one of your friends, layla, asked you. 
that snapped you from your thoughts, turning your head to look at your friends staring at you expectantly. you opened your mouth to say something before closing it again. you were way too scared for it to get out, not that you didn’t trust your friends, you just didn’t want anyone to overhear or constantly be teased by it. shaking your head ‘no’ your friends just went back to the conversation they were having. 
you sighed, looking over your shoulder once more before going back to eating your lunch. the rest of lunch zoomed by and you went to your next class. you had biology with miles, being one of the two classes you had with him. you sat three rows behind him, most classes staring at the back of his head. he’s never turned around or noticed, you’re pretty sure he doesn’t even know you exist. 
sitting in class, you just listened to the teacher explain the direction for a project she was assigning. it was a partner project that she would be assigning. hearing her call out names, your head snapped when you heard your name being followed by miles’ name. you couldn’t believe it. this was gonna be so bad because he made you nervous, you just imagine the whole thing being awkward. you starting shuffling the stuff on your desk, making space for miles who was walking over. he pulls up a chair and slides it across from you, the desk being in between you guys. you didn’t want to make eye-contact so you just played with your hands and bit your lips. miles raised a brow at your behavior thinking it was cute, while your thoughts were going crazy thinking you bombed your only opportunity. 
“i’m miles morales, you’re y/n right?” he asked trying to break the silence. you nodded in response and he gave you a grin before continuing, “so for the project, i was thinking we do the botany and ecology unit since the molecular biology unit is really long and i don’t really wanna do the genetics part.” 
you blessed miles in your mind, thanking him for starting the conversation easily. “uh, yeah i would be fine with that,” you responded. giving you a glanced, he responded “okay, cool” before turning to write in his notebook. 
“i’m not doing anything after school so we could meet in the library, can’t go to my dorm since my roommate is a pretty loud gamer,” he said. you simply nodded. the bell rang signifying that class was over. 
the school day passed and all you could think of is how you were gonna talk to miles after school without sounding stupid. now, you were naturally shy, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t have conversations or lots of friends. it was only miles who made you really nervous and you didn’t want to embarrass yourself in front of him or stumble over your friends.
walking over to the library, you had two paper cups in hand containing hot chocolate. you had wanted one and decided to get one for miles too (also maybe trying to win yourself some brownie points to make him like you a little bit). walking into the library, you look over, already seeing miles at a table with books spread out around him. walking up and stopping in front of him, you gave him a smile.
“i stopped by a cafe before coming here… i hope you like hot chocolate,” you said, trying to sound as calm as possible. miles looking up at you, gave you a grateful smile before grabbing the cup out of your hands. 
“thanks, make yourself at home since we gotta work on this shih.”
you followed by sitting down and started taking your books and notebooks out. after being spread out, miles gave you a piece of scratch paper with a draft of what he kinda wants to do for the project. reading over it, you deemed everything good and nodded at him. you both discussed where to begin and he shared a powerpoint with you. 
an hour passed and you start to feel more confident in your abilities to talk to miles. discussing work and occasional small talk has slightly taken away your nervousness of talking to the pretty boy. 
“i feel like we should put more detail and description on the photosynthesis pa-” you began. 
“can you say that again?”
“that we should put more detail on this part?”
“no, say photosynthesis.”
“photosynthesis?”
“the way you say that is cute, ma,” he grinned. 
your head literally malfunctioned at that moment. there was no way the boy that you have been pining over for the past month just called you cute. you simply nodded, not knowing how to respond when miles kept on pushing. 
“you know, i catch you staring at me a lot,” he smugly said, resting his chin on his hand. 
“i don’t know- i mean, sorry?”
“nah, i think it’s cute. i think your cute in general.”
you felt your face flush and looked to the side, scratching your neck. “thanks miles,” you tried to sound appreciative, but accepting compliments was so hard and weird for you. you didn’t want to come off as stuck up, but also didn’t want to come off as ungrateful either. thankfully, your shyness didn’t back miles off.
“you wanna go out with me sometime? we could go to that cafe you went to earlier. whatever is comfortable for you.”
miles saying that immediately brought you out of your shell. “wait, really?” you asked with a shocked look on your face. miles leaned back in his seat, nodding, “of course, hermosa.” you nodded fast, a big smile on your face. who was going to say no to a date with miles morales?
you both forgot existence of the project in that moment and kept on talking.
extra!
the next day at lunch, you were sitting with your friends talking. miles walked by your table and you gave him a small wave, he waved back following a grin before continuing to catch up with his friends. your friends looked at you in shock.
“uhm mrs. super shy? wanna tell us what that was about?” your friend asked.
“give us all the deets. you just got the school’s pretty boy attention.” your other friend asked. you sighed knowing that even after you explain, the questions and hype from your friends will be never ending. 
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honeytonedhottie · 11 months ago
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starting a video diary⋆.ೃ࿔*:・☁️
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the concept of a video diary is the same as a normal diary, except your filming instead of writing. think of vlogging, its basically the same thing. video diaries are SO much fun to have, video diaries ;
help u to romanticize ur life
give you something to do (simply a fun project that u can try)
make memories that u can go back to and reminisce on
ESTABLISHING THEME ;
whats the theme of ur video diary gonna be? mine is pink ofc! but ur theme doesn't have to be a color. it can also be an aesthetic, whatever u want basically. its YOUR video diary, its your art.
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WHAT TO FILM ;
film important dates in ur life such as graduation, first date or simply just days that ur doing something fun with ur friends. my video diary is mostly from school and what my high school years are like.
WHAT I LIKE TO DO ;
as a super talkative person, a lot of my video diary entries are just me yapping about whatever flies into my mind. sometimes i'll jot down a couple things i wanna talk about (like my own personal podcast 🎀) but most of the time i just do it freely and its lots of fun to see how my mind wanders sometimes
get ready with me's are so FUN to do omg. i see them ALL over my tiktok and i've grown to love watching them. if u like watching them then you'll probably like making them too. u dont have to post ur video diary or anything btw, a video diary is something personal, its a DIARY after all.
talk about what songs you're listening to these days, what shows ur watching etc
FOOD FOR THOUGHT -> formulate and talk about ur own opinions on difficult topics and whats going on in the world
and what i do the most...
i talk SO much about my crushes 💀 and i admit, that some of the stuff i say is a bit "unhinged" but im just a girl at the end of the day, its fun to look back on how i used to talk or who i used to like
basically all the fun about a video diary is to DO AND SAY WHATEVER U WANT its supposed to be FUN. i hope u enjoy ur video diary ✨
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thatdeadaquarius · 2 years ago
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Have some more language brainrot for your brainrot
Writer reader getting kind of insecure that even if they write something nobody will understand it, so when Al haithem askes you if he can keep a draft or two just for analyzing, there's hesitant agreement but ultimately you tell him to please burn the documents once he's done. They're too awkward to look at now...
Only he doesn't burn them, in fact he ends up recruiting several people close to the creator with knowledge of olden speak to analyze them. A funeral parlor consultant well known for his historical knowledge, a 500 year old shrine maiden who owns and runs her own publishing house, and a bard who somehow butted his way in on the project. None of them could resist the opportunity to witness the creator's sacred scriptures with their own eyes.
Needless to say, the papers ended up being fought over and have been making their rounds around your acolytes. It started with Ei, who insisted that as an archon she also should see the creator's work with her own eyes. Then once Ningguang found out, she ordered they be handed over to a team of literary analysts in order to be properly handled and deciphered. Things got really messy quick, but have luckily come to a halt as none of the acolytes want the creator to know their random writings are being fought over.
Especially when it comes to the creator's sullen additute. Their acolytes first have to convince their holiness that their inability to read and understand the creator's writing shouldn't prevent you from doing what you love. In fact... could they convince you to write some more?
WRITER OR READER WITH TALENTS HAS MY WHOLE HEART LIKE-
On one hand, same 💀 id be terrified for my all time fav skrunklies to see my bs
But at the same time i rlly wanna show them goddamit- THANK U FOR THE BRAIN FOOD IM RUNNING LAPS AROUND MY HOUSE THINKING ABT THIS-
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Sun: Gender Neutral Reader (they/them), Writer!Reader
Planet: Language Shenanigans
Orbit: Scenario
Stars: Alhaitham mostly, some of Kaveh, mentions of other Sumeru characters
Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: Insecure about craft/writing, anxious first pov (not serious),
& Trigger Warnings: Mild Negative self-talk, insecure perspective/reader “you”, possible anxiety depiction.
You were not a very confident writer.
This had been an avoidable feeling ever since you picked up a pen for the first time and were asked to write a story for school.
You were always anxious turning in essays, letting friends proofread them, anything that would expose your writing to more eyes, because you’d learned the hard way early on that as you get older and better at something, the stuff from the beginning… starts to look a lot different than you remember.
things you used to be proud of after having completed them in the moment, were something you struggled not to rip to shreds a year or two after you re-found it.
If it weren’t for other writers advising holding onto old work so you can see your progress over time, you’d have probably literally nothing older than one year on your ao3, wattpad, etc…
So when you had the fortunate luck (no it is not unfortunately, you are very happy to be here tbh) to fall headfirst into your video game you’ve been obsessed with lately,
You were not planning on showing them any of your writing.
Why would you, after all? You’ve got the weapons, the artifacts, everything they need to be more powerful. Why would you show them a silly little story you wrote? Fanfic or otherwise, not that theyll recognize any characters besides themselves, but still.
Alhaitham, bc ofc it was alhaitham, cocky, deviously aware bastard he is, caught you writing in your spare time first.
You’d gotten your hands on an old journal (if made you feel better than something completely new, a nice worn leather journal, sold at a secondhand shop from an old adventurer) and had started to write what you could remember about some of your ideas you’d had drafts for in your old world
After initially walking in on you writing in the House of Daena (it was the closest you could get to lofi girl, god u missed her lmao), you nearly jumped a foot in the air bc Haitham’s a nosy bitch and leaned over your shoulder and scared the absolute shit out of you, mans goes from asking politely, to begging you to let him read some of your writing over the course of 3 weeks (a month really)
Finally, after this 6 ft (about 180cm) man leans down one day (you’re sitting writing again), and gives you the most insanely good?? puppy dog eyes??? you’ve ever seen on a man???
you give in, revise a draft about 5 times in a row, lose sleep bc ur having a breakdown about alhaitham judging ur writing the night before you give him his copy-
and hand over a small short story for him to read. you specifically leave a little note not to judge you so hard for Haitham bc u werent used to people reading ur work/let alone someone as highly academic as him, ESPECIALLY since your speech is already so much more archaic than his/all of Teyvats-
His stupid green eyes with diamonds look into your soul (are they sparkling??) and he braces your shoulders after you give him his copy,
“Mine Greatest Guide, you hath deemed this one worthy of thy trust of your creations personally, I would be a fool to gaze upon it in jest. To take this work as anything less than a masterpiece in its infant stages.”
…you just leave him to it, and are nearly running out of there (u managed to be calm enough to just speedwalk),
and you make a point to not ask what he thought about it, or even bring it up at all
you’re kind of hoping he forgot tbh… and so nothing happens!
Nothing happens… for 2 weeks after you gave Haitham a copy of your short story.
You still don’t know Alhaitham’s opinion when you see the advertisement, a sign saying something about, a new book? By YOU???
You nearly start a mob because the shopkeeper insisted you sign some copies, but you only signed a few before too many people overwhelmed you, and seeing it was that same draft- !! Oh god, you’d been agonizing over the spelling errors you’d missed when you gave it to Alhaitham, and now it’s just out there???
(luckily it seems the reviews are positive, but dammit you’ve been rereading ur story u gave him for days, and now ur positive it’s shit-)
You make a break for it, and are literally running (more like speed-walking after a while, since u got further away) thru Sumeru City:
you pass by the open patio of a restaurant, the scholars are heatedly discussing ur characterization-
you pass by Dehya, Candace, and Dunyazard, the merc is waving around a copy of ur book, the other two women look excited abt the conversation-
oh my god-
Nahida is relaxing in one of the many little gazebos thruout Sumeru, while Wanderer seems to be reading your story to her-
You fucking track down Alhaitham’s house like a bloodhound.
You are banging the infamous gay roommates’ front door, panting til ur throat burns raw.
“Yes, yes, alright, greetings to you too! I was simply visiting the Acting Grand Sage Alhaitham, tis why I’m here- Greatest Lord?!”
Kaveh is nearly jumps a foot in the air at the sight of you, but recovers, (you’re still not tho lmao)
and invites you in bc apparently, Alhaitham’s been meaning to talk to you about your draft you gave him!
Oh yeah, you’ve got some words to give Haitham after giving him that damn draft privately-
But when he sees you, the fucker just- smiles??
Like he’s done nothing wrong???
You’re about to tear into him when he speaks first to tell you the good news!
He grabs your hands at the table and gets down on one knee, ohhhh no.
Alhaitham is giving you those damn begging puppy dog eyes again.
“My Greatest Lord, Giver of Power, and Guide to All, your exquisite story has entranced all of Teyvat, might I please insist you write a sequel? It is an excellent literary piece to analyze… or perhaps, even better, share other stories you’ve written??”
….Motherfucker.
Hello I’m alive! I just took a longer-than-usual break between posts from those last 2 mammoth pieces about gifts,
1: bc they were a lot to write in between writing other stuff like fanfics im already working on lol 2: I got busy with holidays and trying to apply to jobs!
Not that I’m still not doing that.. but you get what I mean!
Safe Travels Anon,
That being said, as you’ve probably noticed, I’ve made a kofi! so if you ever liked my writing (hot mess it is) and want to show me some love, feel free to leave a tip! :]
Iced coffee?? :0
💀♒
♡the beloveds♡
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche
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lonelywretchjervistetch · 5 months ago
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The State Birds Initiative - Introduction
Before I do ANYTHING else, and before you read anything else...let's start this with a little poll, shall we?
...Look, I'm an overly ambitious person by nature. It's a problem, I'm fully aware. So, in the midst of writing character essays, imagining my own version of the DC Cinematic Universe (I promise, I will return to the Legion of Super-Heroes series; been having writer's block, not gonna lie), and about a dozen other projects that don't include school and my job (one and the same thing, and I love both, but I'll get to that one day)...I had another thought. That I would like to present to the good people of Tumblr (and perhaps beyond).
The state birds suck.
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Most people on Tumblr don't know this about me, save for a select few that no me in real life (hey guys, 'sup), but I'm an avid birdwatcher, and am currently working in ornithology as a profession and student. As such, and as a former (and future) teacher, I have a vested passion in spreading the word. And one of the first ways most of us in the United States engage with birds, other than through the world and people around us, is through our national bird and state birds. Oh, and for anybody reading this not from the USA, don't worry, national birds are included here, too.
Now, in case you don't know for whatever reason, each one of the states in the United States has a bird meant to represent the state, designated by the government and often nominated by the state's citizens. This tradition started in 1926, with Kentucky's national bird, the Northern Cardinal (Cardinalis cardinalis). Now, most states have an official state bird, although Pennsylvania technically has a state game bird, rather than a state bird. We'll get to it. But in any case, there's a bird associated with every state.
But, uh...most of them suuuuuuuuuuuck.
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Now, for example, I'm not saying that the Northern Cardinal sucks. Far from it! I love cardinals, and honestly, who doesn't? They're handsome birds, they have a lot of character, they're recognizable in most states in the Union by most people. I love them! But, uh...cardinals are extremely overused as state birds. Kentucky chose them as their state bird first, and were followed by Illinois, Indiana, Ohio, North Carolina, West Virginia, and Virginia. That's ridiculous. Also, wait, really, Virginia? You saw that West Virginia had it already, and STILL went for the cardinal? What the hell?
But why? Maybe there's a good reason for all of those states to choose the cardinal, after all. Obviously, it's present in all of those states, because...well, the Northern Cardinal is basically everywhere. But other than that, why? Well, let's see.
Kentucky: Unclear, but it's likely because of its prevalence, songs, and nonmigratory behavior, at least according to some sources; there isn't a lot of evidence online as to why outside of this.
Illinois: For this one, we blame the children. Yeah, kids voted this one sd the symbol, choosing it over the bluebird, meadowlark, bobwhite, and oriole, according to the Illinois Department of Natural Resources. So, yeah, probably because it's familiar and red.
Indiana: For...reasons. Yeah, even less is known about this choice. Safe to assume, though, that it's because it's familiar and red.
Ohio: Apparently, this is because it's red and has a cheerful song. 'Kay. Again, not a lot of evidence for this one, but we'll go with it.
North Carolina: This one also came down to public vote, after a campaign initiated by the North Carolina Bird Club in 1943. It won over the red-winged blackbird, wild turkey, scarlet tanager, and gray catbird. Apparently, this was the second attempt at a state bird, as the Carolina Chickadee (Poecile carolinensis) had been chosen ten years earlier, but only retained the position for a week because the bird's other name is, and this is true, the tomtit. And that was apparently too lewd for the title of state bird. Jesus. We'll get back to that when I address North Carolina officially.
West Virginia: Again, chosen and voted by schoolchildren, and chosen because it's familiar, red, and has a cheerful song. 'Kay.
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Virginia: No idea. Also, don't listen to the sites that say their bird "exemplifies the quality of the state" unless they have the GODDAMN PAPERWORK to back that shit up. If I had to guess, it's possibly because the northern cardinal is one of the first birds seen in the state by settlers to the continental USA, who landed in...Virginia. So, the state's got a historical connection to the cardinal, meaning that the last state to ratify it as a state bird is the one to make the most sense to do so.
So, yeah...only one of those makes sense to me. Otherwise, it just feels...random. And by the way, many of the state birds do make some sense. Utah's choice, the California Gull (Larus californicus), has roots in a Mormon miracle, which makes perfect sense for the Mormon state. Louisiana's Brown Pelican (Pelecanus occidentalis) is an iconic species to the American southeast, and a massive proportion of the species breeds in the state. Same goes for the Scissor-tailed Flycatcher (Tyrannus forficatus), the state bird of Oklahoma. Iconic and unique grassland bird, and it breeds within the state in high quantities for the global population.
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But others? Why does New York (a state I grew up in and around) have the Eastern Bluebird (Sialia sialis) for its state bird? Because it's blue and nice-looking? Why exactly do Wyoming, Oregon, Nebraska, Kansas, Montana, and North Dakota ALL have the Western Meadowlark (Sturnella neglecta)? I love the song too, and it's an iconic grassland species, but really? All of you? And Maine? Maine...Maine. I mean, you didn't even go for a specific species and just listed "chickadee" as your state bird. Why? There is a MUCH. BETTER. OPTION. OBVIOUSLY. But...I digress.
...FUCK IT
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WHY ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH IS MAINE'S STATE BIRD NOT THE ATLANTIC PUFFIN (Fratercula arctica)??? ANSWER ME MAINE GODDAMMIT
Seriously, what the hell? It's the only state IN THE UNION where the Atlantic puffin breeds, and it's an incredibly iconic bird! I mean, look at that thing! They're adorable, fish-eating, clumsy-flying, feathery orbs with a Froot Loops beak (for part of the year), complete with their own fucking cereal that I ate constantly as a child. And their babies are called pufflings! PUFFLINGS!!! DO YOU HEAR ME MAINE WHAT THE FU
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...OK. OK. I'm good. Look, this genuinely irritates the SHIT out of me, both as a hobbyist and as a professional. There are near 1,000 bird species that can be found in the United States, and the state birds are, honestly, some basic-ass choices that doesn't BEGIN to explore the incredible diversity of this taxon. And honestly, maybe if we changed up the state birds, we could increase awareness for these animals and their conservation stories and needs. There are so many missed opportunities here for us as educators, birders, ornithologists, backyard birdwatchers, and even Birdblr, to educate those around us who aren't as ornithologically-inclined. Imagine being able to convince a friend to go find the state bird on a trip some weekend. It could be a fun activity, and a fun way to get into birdwatching and the natural world! IT'S GOT POTENTIAL!!!
And look, I realize I'm not alone on this front. Various people have proposed changing up the state birds, including some more powerful professionals than I. If you haven't seen it yet, check out this essay series from the Cornell Lab of Ornithology that came out last year, which asks whether or not eBird could be used to identify better candidates for state birds. And I'll be using it for what's coming next. Because here's the thing. I'm tired of ranting alone in the dark towards nobody while my fiancee is trying to sleep about this. I need to rant to you poor people instead. And what's more...I want people to rant with me. If they want to. So...
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TO ME, BIRDBLR!!! LEND ME YOUR BINOCULARS!!!
I propose an initiative to create a new list of state birds for the United States of America. And I'm talkin' EVERY state, baby! Even the ones that have fitting birds, as mentioned above. We live in a GODDAMN DEMOCRACY, and I say that we put this to a vote. So, Imma make a series of polls, one for each state. And yeah, that's 50 polls. Each will have a selection of birds, including the current state bird for that state, and I'll present the options in each case. The rules and selection criteria for the birds I'll present are as follows:
The bird has to be wild and breed in the state in question. No migrants, to accidentals, no introduced species (looking at you, South Dakota), no domestic species (looking at you, Rhode Island and Delaware). They're from the state, they breed there, and they're wild. Don't have to be endemic to the state, but they need to be found there, at bare goddamn minimum.
No repeats! Every state will have a different species! No more repeats. If there are any ties for states to get a given bird, another set of polls will be made at the end to determine which state will get that bird, and the second highest bird will claim the spot for that state. I'll try to avoid that for each state, but we'll see how things go.
There has to be a reason for their selection. For each of the birds presented for each state, I'll make a solid argument for their nomination. This also goes for any birds submitted to me for suggestions (and yes, I mean to say y'all can make suggestions if you want to for each state). If you have a bird you think would be good for a state, especially if it's your state, please give me a reason. Not that it's pretty, not that you like it's song, not that it "represents the spirit of the state's people" for no easily defined reason. GIVE ME A REASON
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And for now, that's it! And hell, if this gets popular or demanded (and I'm saying this if, like, 30 people pay attention to this post), I'll also do the District of Columbia and the U.S. territories. And hell (again), I'll even consider doing other countries if that gets demanded, definitely starting with Canada and seeing how things go from there. And finally...if people want it, maybe even the Bald Eagle (Halieetus leucocephalus) will go up for debate as the USA's national bird. Although, not gonna lie, I think that we're stuck with that one. Still, there are other questions that can be brought up if this gets popular enough. For now, though, let's focus on one thing at a time.
So, hopefully you answered the poll at the top, because I am curious as to what you think about your state bird. And just to set this up, the first state on the chopping block is Delaware, which has one of the most offensive state birds, in my opinion. Because seriously. What the fuck, Delaware? What the fuck.
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See you soon, hopefully! And happy birding!
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Introduction to the State Birds Initiative
1. Delaware - Poll | Results 2. Pennsylvania - Poll | Results 3. New Jersey - Poll | Results 4. Georgia - Poll | Results 5. Connecticut - Poll | Results 6. Massachusetts - Poll | Results
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maevstar · 3 months ago
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| Introducing myself in my fame dr ᯓᡣ𐭩
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ᝰ. My name is Maeve Amelie Solace, but people usually call me by “Mae”.
ᝰ. I’m 26yo and I’m an A-list american actress and singer. (I was born in 1997 but I didn’t turned 27 yet).
ᝰ. I started my way on acting when I was 16 when my older brother was doing a play on high school and begged me to participate. I did, and since then I’ve been in love with acting.
ᝰ. When I graduated from high school i moved out from my hometown — Austin, Texas — to LA and entered to UCLA School of Theater.
ᝰ. My first big project in Hollywood was “The Edge of Seventeen” when I was 19-20yo, before that I just worked with small projects, mostly from my uni.
ᝰ. That project gave me more visibility in the industry and I became more well known.
ᝰ. Some of my films: The Edge of Seventeen, The School for Good and Evil (adaptation of the books), Lady bird, Scream 4 (2018), Little Woman, Causeway, We Live in a Time, Challengers, Me Before You, Glass Onion 2, Duna, Anyone but You, Don’t look up, No hard feelings, Don’t worry darling, The outrun, and etc.
ᝰ. Some of my shows: Supernatural (Claire Novak), Looking for Alasca, YOU, outer banks (season 4).
ᝰ. I’ve been nominated for the Oscar 4 times as the best Actress in a Leading Role, but I’m just gonna win the award in the 4th time (2024). Futhermore, i’ve won a lot of awards and nominations like Emmy’s and Golden Globes. In 2022, I entered the list of The Most Influential People by Time Magazine.
Now, my singer career:
ᝰ. My mom is a country singer — not much known — in Texas, so I’ve grew up loving music, and I’ve been writing songs since I was 15, but these never turned into real songs, until 2019-2020, when I recorded my EP’s.
ᝰ. My first EP is called “Minor” and it has 7 songs. I released it in 2019 just for fun, was some songs that I’ve been writing during the years. In 2020 I released more 2 EPs, called “Bittersweet” and “Good Riddance”, with 7 and 10 songs respectively, again, just for fun.
ᝰ. Now, my new coming up project on music is my first Album, called “The Secret Of Us”, it has 13 songs (+ 7 from deluxe) and all of them will have a music video, cause my objective is making a visual album.
ᝰ. With my new album, I intend to go on my first tour.
Fun facts about me:
ᝰ. I know ballet and gymnastics cause when my sister was 8 years old she wanted to learn but was scared to do it alone, so I used to go to classes with her.
ᝰ. I have 3 siblings, Will, Kayla and Austin. Will is 2 years older than me, Kayla is younger than me 4 years and Austin is 8 years younger than me. (Another fun fact is that Austin is adopted).
ᝰ. My s/o is Drew Starkey, I met him in a party at Maddie Cline’s house (2021). Also, Madelyn is my best friend and I’m very close to the cast of the outer banks too.
ᝰ. I’m in fact brazilian. I was born there but my family moved to the US when I was 8 — my father is brazilian but my mom is from us, she was in a trip when met my dad in brazil and blablabla — so I have dual nationality. (latinas are better lol). But when I was 14, I moved again to Brazil and lived there for almost 2 years with my aunt before I came back to US.
ᝰ. When I was 16, I made a YouTube channel with my brother Will and we used to talk about the most random things ever (btw it was a flop lol, this channel just came up when we became famous). (another fun fact is that he is also a well known actor, but more on theater plays than on screen).
ᝰ. When I was in high school, I was planning on going to med school — mostly because of my dad, he’s a doctor (my obsession with greys anatomy might got me inclined to that too🤭) — but then I fell in love with acting (when I was 16, like i said) and never quit. Besides that, I’m still very interested with things related to science and human body, stuff like that; most of things that I know are bc of my dad tho.
ᝰ. I’m polyglot. I speak Portuguese, English, Italian, Spanish and a bit of French and Latin. I also know ASL.
ᝰ. I still don’t know how to ride bikes without training wheels cause no one ever taught me (😭).
ᝰ. I love the sea, beaches, everything related to that, it’s one of my favorite places in the world.
mood boards; mood boards details;
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amethystfairy1 · 9 days ago
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🎉 Happy New Years! 🎉
It's been a loooong year so I figured I may as well make a post about it, as well as talk a bit about my plans for 2025! As you know, I tend to ramble, so this got a little long, and maybe sounds a little too much like an Oscars acceptance speech...whoopsie 😅...but from the bottom of my heart I genuinely just felt like I needed to get all these emotions that were emotion-ing today thinking about the New Year out for those of you who have played a part in giving them to me.
If you have a few minutes, please do give it a read through!
The Mushy Stuff:
Firstly, and most importantly beyond a doubt, I want to thank everyone who's been so incredibly kind and supportive of my writing this past year! Every kudos, comment, like, follow, ask, all of them have been treasured by me!
I've had a very difficult year. As I've mentioned before, I'm a full-time masters student. I also work a nearly full-time job on top of that. And while I don't like my blog to have anything to do with my train wreck of an irl life this year, let's just say it hasn't been great...lots of stuff went down, lots of things went wrong, so on and so forth.
Point is, my tippy taps have been crucial to my mental health. I started TTSBC, literally posted the first story 'Pretty Boy' on my very first day as a grad student, sitting there in the office with the knowledge that between school, work, and things happening in my own life, and I'd be having a really rough couple of years to get this degree done.
I finish in May, and I feel confident with my work, I'm ahead of the curve, I'm doing well, and I think that's in no small part because of my tippy taps. These AUs, the writing challenges, the amazing friends I've made and the little community that's somehow decided for whatever reason to form around my obsession with the block people, they've been a very big part of what's kept me going through all of this.
Knowing I could count on people to read my work, to enjoy it, that I could give someone out there something to relate too or even just make them smile if they were feeling as shitty as I was, that made me feel better. It's been so, so important to me.
So thank you. Thank you for following Through the Sky-Blue Cracks and Traveling Thieves. Thank you for screaming over my Whumptober and Febuwhump collections. Thank you for following me, for chasing me and my thoughtful Batman gif around in the asks, for playing along with my goofy-ass side blog, for commenting and kudos-ing and somehow materializing the instant a chapter goes up even before I post the tumblr notif. It means a lot more than I think any words I could come up with would convey.
I also really really really want to thank my Tinted Glass crew!
@silver-sunray This is all your fault. You started this 😤 And by that I mean you made these AUs and me screaming into the void alone so much more than that. It's because of you that I started to fight the fear, scuttle out of my shell and start actually trying to talk to others in this little online sphere. Your incredible work on the Beyond project and now in helping with my side blog and all our other plans and projects mean the world to me! You always have so much spunk and confidence whenever any ideas pop up that I suddenly feel like it's so much more is achievable thanks too you. I'm so very happy you reached out to me this year and I know so much that I've done with my writing wouldn't have happened without you 💖
@boo-the-ahh you're just the sweetest! You always make everything feel so light even when things are complicated or heavy, and you don't even know it! I love getting to work with you on the podfics and our other projects we've been plotting! You're always so full of energy and enthusiasm and encouragement that makes me feel like I can come up with the most whack-ass idea and you'll just back me up, and that's absolutely amazing! I'm so happy you reached out to me and started podficcing for me! Your work is incredible! You put in so much effort, your final products are always so beautifully polished and you always go the extra mile even when it makes things trickier. I admire that so much! And I apologize in advance for the sheer amount of my writing you're probably doomed to have to read out loud in the coming year 😅
@khoirkid You're just a marvel, in my opinion, which I know you don't share but shhhhhhhh. You come up with masterpieces at the drop of a hat, and the fact that you are willing to draw my whack-ass lil guys is still just unfathomable to me. You're always so easy to talk too and down to earth, and you're so creative and imaginative with how you weave symbols into your art with different imagery and color! I feel like half the time the stuff you come up with is so articulate and amazing that it goes over my head, but that's fine! 😆 You're so knowledgable and you have a perspective on things that helps me think things through. I love getting to work with you and I'm so very grateful for all the gorgeous illustrations, and for all the time you've given to me that's made me feel a little less alone.
All three of y'all are just so cool and supportive and talented that most of the time I don't get why you're hanging out over here and giving so much of your time and energy to these projects of mine, but I'm forever grateful that I have you as my friends. So thank you. 💜
Plans for 2025:
Ok, now that I've gotten my emotions all emotion-ed out, let's talk a little bit about my plans for the New Year!
Of course I'll still be continuing TTSBC and TT! No doubt about it! There's big things happening in both the AUs, and I'm so very excited to share them with everyone!
I'll be finishing my degree in May...to be perfectly honest, I'm still unsure of how much of a workload I'm gonna end up having academically this last semester, so I think I'll just say that if updates slow down a bit, just assume Amethyst is drowning under piles of revisions doused in red ink and a bunch of reference texts and papers due to be graded. I promise I'm not gonna just stop tippy tapping! I don't think my brain would be able to handle it if I did 😅
As far as some of the typical challenges go, I will not be participating in Febuwhump this year. I wish I could, but I know I'll definitely have too much going on academically to commit to another writing challenge...also I think Whumptober almost killed both Khoir and I, and we don't need to be doing that again anytime soon 😵‍💫 I'm still gonna check out the prompt list, and if I see a few prompts that I find particularly intriguing maybe I'll write those up, and do a few of the days, but I won't be doing the full writing challenge.
Jury is still out on Hermit-a-Day May, which I'm hopeful will be running again this year! I'd love to do it, but I'll have to make that later, once I know for certain how my workload is feeling since I'll be doing my final revisions, my defense, all that good stuff in late April, which is when I'd typically be working up my fics for Hermit-a-Day May.
I will be doing Whumptober. No questions about it!
I have a few other Hermit/Traffic/Empires fanfic projects on the back burner that I'm working on here or there whenever I need to take a lil break from TTSBC and TT. One of them is a project that all of the Tinted Glass Crew is working on together, and while I don't wanna give spoilers, I'll just say that it's going to be a ton of fun! It's unlike any other AU or one-off I've ever done before, and even just brainstorming it has been incredible so please look forward to it!
I also have my original series. Which...I haven't talked about, not really. I'm pretty nervous about putting it out there, to be honest, but it's my baby and I've been working on it for over four years now. It's written in a similar style to TTSBC and TT, that is, focused on queer romance and found family in a ton of stories all organized in chronological order and written up and down on a timeline. One of my big hopes for this year is to finally share this series. I dunno where yet, or when...it'll definitely wait until after I finish my degree in May, that much is for certain, but I suppose I just wanted to prime everyone. The Tinted Glass Crew has already been so amazingly kind as to agree to help me find a way to get this story that's so dear to me out to all of y'all someway somehow...and I'm confident if I have those guys on my team we'll figure it out! 😅
I hope, if you've enjoyed TTSBC and TT and any of my other work, you'll at least give my original blorbos a shot whenever they are freed from their little cage in my notebooks and save files. They're not so different from the way I write my MCYT characters, they're a bunch of big gay idiots with personality issues, a ton of tangled up secrets, and more trauma than you can shake a stick at...and they're mine, which means I really like to put them through the wringer. 😆 But after everything I've done over this past year and even further back here on this blog, on A03, and in this little community, I feel like maybe they might find themselves a home in at least some of your hearts...or maybe just piss you off with their poor life decisions and accidentally give you brainrot, who knows.
Anyway, this has been a lot. Sorry I tend to ramble...all of this is just to say thank you. I had a lot of fun this year, getting to share my stories with all of you, and I hope you'll continue to support me as I tippy tap my way into the New Year!
-Amethyst
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luciathcv · 10 months ago
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princess, is your hand okay? - psh
summary: your boyfriend doesn't like you doing school work so late at night || warnings: none || genre: fluff, established relationship || word count: approximately 880
I sat at my desk, typing and writing away. I was currently working on a long project that I had due the next evening. I knew I could just do it tomorrow in the morning when I actually had some rest but I didn’t want to have to worry about it tomorrow so I opted for staying up late to work on it today. I mean, I technically had a lot of time to work on this but, what can I say, procrastination gets the best of me.
It was already nearly two in the morning and my lack of sleep was starting to get to me. My eyes were starting to hurt but not only my eyes, but my hand as well from how much writing I was doing.
I hissed as I dropped the pen onto the desk, grabbing my wrist with my other hand before I let go and started waving my hand around, trying to move my wrist and warm up the muscle.
Sunghoon had been laying on the bed the whole time but honestly I thought he had fallen asleep a while ago since I was so focused on my schoolwork. Little did I know, he had been awake this whole time, honestly fighting sleep as well.
When he saw me shake my wrist in pain for the nth time, he came over. He stood behind me as he gently grabbed my wrist, startling me. He smiled down at me as I looked up at him, who still held my wrist in his hand. 
“Princess, is your hand okay?” He asked in a soft but definitely sleepy tone.
“It hurts.” I admit.
“That’s your sign that it’s time for bed. Come on, baby.” Sunghoon tells me, going to help me up but I stop him.
“No, I can’t. I need to get this done.” I told him.
He sighs, “Princess, how many times have I told you that you don’t have to do this. I’ll work for us. I’ll do it with no problem whatsoever. Seriously.”
I look down for a moment, “Hoon, I know… and I appreciate it but, I just want to have my degree just in case I change my mind and I want to work in the future.”
He gives me a small nod of acknowledgment, “I know, I know.” Sunghoon says as he stands beside me now. “How much more do you have?” He asks.
“One more section, then I’m done.” I told him.
“Fine. Finish it up, baby.” He says as he steps away from me and sits at the end of the bed.
Fifteen-ish minutes later and I’m finally finished. I click the “submit” button and close my laptop once I see that it went through. I get up and walk over to Sunghoon and he stands up.
He walks to my side of the bed with me, his hand on the small of my back as I get under the covers. He then gets on top of me and goes over me to get to his side of the bed. I giggle at his actions which makes him smile as he gets under the covers as well.
Once he’s comfortable under the covers, I get closer and rest my head against his shoulder. I feel his arm make it's way under and around me, pulling me closer as it rests on my hip. 
“You didn’t have to wait for me, you know. You could’ve slept.” I softly tell him.
“I know.” He responds. “But I couldn’t have my princess staying up all by herself.” He then tells me as he gives me a cocky smile. “I’m just the best boyfriend ever, what can I say.”
“Oh my god, shut up.” I say with a smile as I nuzzle against him. “But that’s true.” I then shyly add.
Sunghoon doesn’t respond, he just smiles at my words. He knew that if he were to say anything in response to your words, you’d get all flustered and he couldn’t have that when you needed to sleep.
“You know that I was serious when I told you that you don’t have to do any of this, the college stuff, I mean. I’ll work for both of us. I have no problem with that. I know that college is hard.” Sunghoon tells me. 
He had talked to me about this a few times before. I liked the idea of it but at the same time, although I wasn’t planning on working, I felt that I should get my bachelors just so that I always had it if I wanted to work in the future.
“I know. I want that. But I also feel like I should do this, at least.” I tell him and he understood where I was coming from as well.
“I’m proud of you, you know?” He tells me.
“Thank you.” I say, blushing a little. He was one of the only people in my life who told me that and I appreciated it. I really did.
“Now go to sleep, I’m tired, I know you’re tired, and it’s late.” Sunghoon says. I giggle as I nod, agreeing as I close my eyes. I feel him kiss my forehead before he shut his eyes as well, the both of us drifting to sleep almost instantly.
ᥫ᭡ link to my masterlist
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kokushibosbestie · 3 months ago
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ok so idk if u do like x reader stuff but if you do, can u do like a Sally face fic or headcannons with Sal and Larry. I wanted to request what it would be like for them to have like a very busy s/o. Like I do marching band and outside of school I do volleyball and lessons for trombone and piano. Along with that I take AP classes and student council which give me more work to do so I feel pretty drained by the end of the day
♡~ Sal and Larry w/ busy S/O HCs ~♡
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A/N: Yes, I take requests and do (Character) x reader headcannons! AND I'M SO SORRY IF THIS WASN'T GOOD AND I KNOW LARRY'S PART ISN'T LONG I HOPE YOU CAN FORGIVE ME ANON. ALSO IM SORRY THAT IT TOOK SO LONG, I'VE BEEN REALLY BUSY WITH SCHOOL AND I HAD WRITERS BLOCK FOR LIKE 3 WEEKS 😭🙏
Warnings: None, just pure fluffiness and love. GN!reader.
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♪ Sal Fisher ♪
· HE'S JUST A FKN SWEETHEART 😭😭 · I will say that he is going to make sure to make your life easier no matter what · like doing chores, helping you with projects and assignments, and planning out your week · I don't think many realize this, but he is not the "badass player" people portray him as. 😔 · So, he will make you sit down with him on the weekend and ask how things are going. · And this is with everything. Work, school, family life, your relationship with him, your mental health, etc. · He is serious about it too. 😅 He cares a lot and he doesn't like to see you stressed. · So when you come home tired and worn out, he will not be happy. · he knows it's not your fault and you can't help it "Love, please stop doing this to yourself. You know this isn't good." · Like I said, he loves you 🥰 · istg this man HAS and WILL beg you to take a break · so when you come home, he'll already have a bath ready for you · once you're done taking a bath, he'll make you sit down on the floor in front of the couch so he can brush / comb your hair · and I honestly think he's not the best cook, but he will cook your favorite food no he won't, it's going to be takeout because he failed · your room is already cleaned and he bought you squishmellows to add to your collection · he'll cuddle you to sleep while playing with your hair · definitely the big spoon on nights like this "Relax baby, you need to get sleep. I'll be right here when you wake up, okay?"
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☆ Larry Johnson ☆
· I'ma be fr with you, he would NOT notice at first · Not until Ashley said something but after she brings it to his attention that you need a little bit more attention, he will do exactly that · and istg, he WILL pick you up bridal style and carry you away from whatever you were doing 👀 · If you protest, he will glare at you and ignore it. · Any kind of work you do is "overworking yourself" to him · so beware · Imma be completely honest, this man CANNOT keep up with you · Your ship dynamic is literally "busy mastermind and their assistant who worships them but can't keep up." 😭💞 · larry is the one worshiping you "Look, I know you have a lot going on, so don't try to convince me that you aren't. I might be stupid in school but I'm not stupid with you." · he will say shit that doesn't make sense WHATSOEVER. 😔 · Ofc, he won't admit that he's trying to take care of you · or keep up with you · obvi 🙄 · I have my own hc that he actually does know how to cook nicely, so I think he'd make you food you'd watch a movie together and talk · once your social battery is completely out, he'll offer you to sleep on his chest. 🥰 · and when you wake up, he's gunna make you breakfast. "Don't try to keep yourself up babe. You've had a long day, so just rest."
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DISCLAIMER: THE HEADER IS MINE, THOUGH THE FANART IS NOT. THE DIVIDERS ARE NOT MINE, ONCE AGAIN, THEY ARE NOT MINE. ALL CREDITS GO TO ORIGINAL POSTERS / CREATORS!!! ALL WRITING BELONGS TO ME!!!
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sunsetkerr · 10 months ago
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SAMMY'S GIRL (ii) | s.kerr
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summary: MORE headcanons on your relationship with sam, read part one here.
pairing: fem!reader x sam kerr
notes: getting out lots of little headcanons because they're just so much fun to do. sammy's girl is my favourite of all my girls (completely bias, sorry) but if you want to see what other 'wags' are in my lil universes, check out my masterlists!! each 'wag' is also going to get their own tag, so check those out for little file facts, or ask questions/send thoughts so we can add to them all!! lots of love
as previously established, you’ve grown up with sam right
you’ve known her through every little phase and every weird obsession she’s ever had
you know her deepest secrets and she knows yours
its honestly quite jarring because you both know each other better than you know yourselves
you’re not at sporty as sam, only relaly dabbling in school netball for carnivals and stuff when they needed extra girls
but sam would try and include you as much as she could in all aspects of her career
if she was having a solo gym day, or just going on a walk
guess whos coming with!?!!!
its you!!!!!!
if she wants a swim at the beach for recovery
she is making sure that you tag along
(not just to see you in your bathers, its for recovery, have some professionalism please)
sam has spent half of her life without you and having to settle for seeing you through a screen
so once you’re in london with her permanently, she is making the most of that
she needs to shower? you’re passing her body wash
she’s hungry? shes making two servings and you’re eating with her
she wants a coffee? youre heading to your favourite spot
you are always around
and sam isn’t having it if you’re not
when she does have to go away?
youre getting texts from guro, erin and millie complaining about her
‘omg she wont shut up about you’
‘if sam doesn’t stop talking im gonna clock her y/n, i won’t be held responsible for my actions’
‘she’s at a new level of pathetic, please come get your girl’
but they understand, they love you too
the entirety of the chelsea squad know you’re at every game
they have a dedicated seat for you in the family and friends section
everyone is away that it’s your seat
millie’s fiancée wards people away from it
he once had to face the consequences of sitting in your seat
he wouldn’t wish an angry emma hayes or sam kerr upon anyone
but its not all about sam
she is just your biggest cheerleader
you were able to finish your degree online and were lucky enough that your credentials in australia carried over to the uk 
so you started working there
im picturing sports journalism???????? you were forced to be around sport your entire life that it kinda just became a natural thing
you were so well-informed on so many different sports it was crazy
sam loved plugging anything you were writing
you posted a new article? she’s sharing that shit on her instagram story
you won an award for a piece? she’s at the ceremony
you’re working overtime to get a project finished? she’s ordering you dinner to the office
as much as sam is a professional and very famous athlete
she’s still just sammy to you
and she’s never forgotten that
but to her, you are the best thing to ever happen to planet earth
and she makes sure that everyone knows
living with sam is lots of fun
you relish in all of the time you get to spend together
call it making up lost time
sure, she leaves her stuff everywhere
but you’re guilty of that too
you still hold each other accountable
‘sam you didn’t do the dishes’
‘okay and you didn’t hang out the laundry’
‘… fair enough’
making dinner together is just chaotic 
sam can only cook breakfast, she excels at smashed avocado
so she really lets you take the reins on dinners 
she succumbs to the sou-chef life
you force her to watch movies with you
she argues and says that tv shows are better
(even though you know she’s completely invested in whatever film you’ve chosen)
you have a little brother who just idolises sam
and he has since the day he was born
he was a classic accident child, a real surprise for your parents
but watching him grow up was just the best
hes the biggest women’s soccer fan you know
he’s up-to-date on all of the woso drama
definitely can tell you the entire timeline and drama of the mcfoord relationship 
so when he’s old enough
sam flies him over to the uk all the time
he just loves sam so much
he wears her jersey to every game, saying he doesn’t want anyone elses
(maybe maccas, but that’s a different story)
and sam is estatic to have him there
definitely walks out with him as her mascot on multiple occasions
sam isn’t super touchy feely in front of others
but when shes drunk, she can’t help it
she just wants to hold you and she doesn’t care who’s around to see it
sam really loves watching men at bars or in clubs try to hit on you
just to go and ruin their fun
it’s her favourite pastime really
sam’s extra sappy and clingy when tired
after a big night or a tiring game, she wants to curl up next to you and have you hold her until she falls asleep
sometimes it’s a foreign feeling for you
sam is almost always the big spoon
so you really drink in the feeling whenever she feels vulnerable enough to let you hold her for a change
sam is also extra attentive when you’re not feeling well
she’s so doting and always checking in on you
if shes around, you’re being waited on hand and foot
‘are you okay? do you have a temp?’
‘let me get you some water’
‘i don’t like the sound of that cough, y/n’
if she’s away for a game, your phone does not stop ringing
she’s always texting when she has a spare minute 
and if she has more than ten minutes to spare, she’s calling you to see how you are
sam just adores you
the fans adore you even more
the amount of tiktok edits of you and sam are crazy
the one of you in the stands after her goal against england in the world cup went viral
the way you jumped out of your seat and almost threw yourself over the barrier was on the news the next day
the clip continuing as sam ran over to your section, as you both shouted in celebration to each other
or the clips in the matildas doco series of the two of you
the lesbians went feral for that shit
everyone wants what you have
everyone wants you
you are that bitch
sam knows it too
and she’s not afraid to let people know just who you are
because you’re hers 
forever and always
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