#a better beer for a better world
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frogshunnedshadows · 3 months ago
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Official fake commercial for the fake beer of the Alien universe. Nice touch, guys. I appreciate it.
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fisherrprince · 16 days ago
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instead of going to sleep I decided to give sprawl ven a more detailed set of clothes
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selfinflictedgunshotwound · 3 months ago
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i'm kind of amazed how most of the stardew marriage candidates just want you to be their manic pixie dream whatever by agreeing with everything they like and plying them with compliments or praise or whatever (which is fine but a bit. Much) but for shane his romance is just you being there for him while he figures his own shit out... dunno why i never wanted to romance him before he's so good
#i'm usually a sebastian kinda guy but i do think it's silly you have to say you like scifi to gain friendship points w him like cmon man#i will say though that. my bestie's baby daddy being named shane kinda does make it hard to like him 😭 unfortunate but not his fault#ik a lot of ppl are weird abt his recovery and his messy ass room bc they play stardew to make things look pretty or whatever#but i'm actually kind of glad he's a realistic depiction of addiction... the problem is his dependence on indulging in alcohol when he's#depressed not the fact that he drinks period... i think that a lot of ppl are unrealistic abt alcoholism (including me abt my dad's)#but concernedape did really good w him imo. anyways all this to say that i'm really glad shane never expects someone to be a certain way#i know most of the candidates are like. archetypes or whatever and i think that's fine they are very sweet and cute regardless but#i think maybe i didnt romance him before bc i related to him so badly that it hurt seeing myself reflected LMAO dead end life and being#suicidal about it like. i've never had a drug dependence but i'm not really in a position where i can ever make my own decisions anyways#but regardless. there is smth to someone who slowly warms up to you when they can't ignore your kindness any longer and have no reason to#act like an abused dog anymore which. does make me sad just to say but that is how he acts beforehand#idkkkkk idk i think people are always too caught up with his addiction and his messy room to actually see him without realizing that#getting better is a lot harder than it appears and that having a dirty room doesn't mean you aren't trying to be better. sigh#besides it's not like. the end of the world that he has a beer sometimes. have you tried going thru life completely sober? it sucks#ok im done LMAO but yeah i've found myself gravitating towards him this time around when i've romanced sebastian literally every playthru#til now. hmm!#ACTUALLY ONE MORE THING. i like how he's basically a twist on the classic useless husband trope in media where they love sports and drinking#but he's not a bad person and the only reason he's mean to you at first is because he hates himself and his own life and he makes an effort#the more you get close to him instead of the opposite. i like that a lot. ok now i'm done
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nationalvyvanseshortage · 3 months ago
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Ever since I was a small child I have talked to strangers like a curious old man from a village that just got its first telegram line.
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lupismaris · 2 months ago
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truly, and I don't mean this to sound like a bit, go to the gay bar. with some friends if you can. life won't feel as futile afterwards.
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teleomancer · 1 year ago
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#so it's Infect Your Friends And Loved Ones with the bit about 'everyone around here knows about you'#even if it's positive- the world pays so much more fucking attention to my life for being trans and it makes me.. shiver?#coffee clerk fumbled every facet of taking my order and the apology landed super duper sideways#'oh sorry! it's just that it's my first time helping *you* is all- just seen you around a lot before. you know.' yeah? know what exactly?#how's that supposed to make me feel? every month they hire someone new and we get to do the same tiring song and dance#another young-20s clerk that will not stop trying to make small talk w/me beats ones that only glare yeah- this isn't pain just frustration#and like YES it's better than the cashier that beats the shit out of my beers on purpose or crumples receipts to hand them to me#or the audible 'see- told you he's a man' commentary when he can see stubble behind a mask on days that can't bother me to shave#like the pharmacists at this supermarket make me well aware that nobody else gets their E here. the store knows the local tranny. great.#genpop cannot reliably be fucking Normal Abt Transfems to the point that it makes me wanna thank the rare coworker that just like.#doesn't treat me like anyone different or special or a threat or a curiosity or an object or a shot to gain social capital for being nice?#getting told by young-20s cis girls that calling me dude didn't mean anything b/c they're 'y'know! *also* [limp wrist mime] *girlypop!*'#hits closer to home than getting called a slur to my face because the latter asshole doesn't pretend to be my friend and just.#skips straight to making me a paper doll in their head of what it means to be me and shaped like me and dressed like me and it's.. slimy.#'everyone around here knows about you.'
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bongsavior · 1 year ago
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You’re 26, it’s time to mature a little bit.
LMAOOOOO what does this mean ??? 😭😂
Sorry you can't post goofy shit anymore you're twenty six. Didn't you know being silly past the age of 25 is a crime and a slander to society? You'll have to stop right now mister, or i'll call the cops!!!
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Beer is just wet bread.
- Chad (2023)
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neproxrezi · 2 years ago
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where do i contact mathieu cote to ask he grab ahold of felix richter and maybe recede that hairline a little bit
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scantilycladplatypus · 7 months ago
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man I'm honestly really sad how bad of a friend I've been since covid. I really shut off and didn't figure out how to turn back on really.
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tonycries · 8 months ago
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Initiation!
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Synopsis. “Just a small initiation, nothing too serious.” Couldn’t be too hard, right? So why are you - the all-new frat sweetheart - being pinned to the bed and stuffed full from all ends by your frat brothers?
Pairing. Gojo Satoru x Reader, Geto Suguru x Reader, Fushiguro Toji x Reader, brief Nanami x Reader
Content. MDNI, fem! reader, fratboy! JJK men, gangbang, frat sweetheart! reader, cumplay, choking, oral (male + female), anal, double penetration, cunnilingus, Suguru is MEAN - so is everyone else, some heinous things idek how to tag, unprotected, no curses! AU, marking, pet names (princess, darling, doll), swearing.
Word count. 4.8k
A/N. Am not the same person I was before I wrote this…
Art by @_3aem on X.
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Tequila was your best friend when Suguru and Satoru weren’t around.
Which is probably why you were five shots deep before 9pm, heavy bass thrumming through your veins and sleek tabletop steady under your rocky heels.
Everything was a blur. The pulsing neon lights, cheers following your every sway and twirl, and the atmosphere heavy with beer and laughter in that heady Jujutsu Phi frat house. 
You almost miss that familiar flash of cloudy white locks and those narrowed black eyes greedily watching your hips to the beat. Almost. 
An excited exclamation of “There’s our all-new sweetheart!”. And the world tilts.
Falling down really does feel good. Especially when the ground is so warm - and smells faintly of overpriced cologne. 
��Careful, there, Satoru. Wouldn’t wanna hurt the sweetheart right before initiation.” 
A pair of strong arms underneath you, and a deep voice hot against your ear. “Havin’ a lotta fun without us, huh?”
Oh, you’d recognize those devastatingly handsome faces anywhere. You blink, eyebrows furrowed slightly at your best friends as you tried to focus on their words. “Sweetheart? Me?”
To your right, Suguru nods slowly, a sly smile playing on his lips. “Absolutely. Who else? No one better we can think of, darling.” 
Satoru’s eager voice chimes in, “As presidents, and the only men to binge Bridgerton with you, we love you. The frat brothers love you too, especially our supervisor.”
“Mmm, I dunno. What do I hafta do?” face heating and words slurring together, in your alcohol-induced haze, you miss the devilish glance shared between the two. 
Satoru chuckles, a dark glint in his eyes, “Just a small initiation, nothing too serious.”
Your laughter is infectious, and without much hesitation you raise your empty shot glass in toast, “Hmm, deal! To the newest frat sweetheart! How hard can it be?”
---
The consequences aren’t half as fun as the chaos.
Wincing at the dull ache reverberating in your head, you struggle to make sense of your surroundings in the dim lighting. Still disoriented and bleary-eyed, you sink into soft navy bed sheets.
Ah, soft. So soft. Warm, with a tinge of candied apples.
Satoru.
Slight panic setting in, and Satoru’s room swaying ever-so-slightly, you try to will away the overplayed pop pounding from the party still raging below - focusing on the whispered conversation at the foot of the bed..
“---blast at the party------”
“------frat---sweetheart.”
Head snapping up in a daze, the word “sweetheart” echoes in your ears. 
Something heated and prickly pools in your stomach as fragments of memories from not too long ago begin to piece themselves together. 
Your dawning realization - and sense of impending doom - is interrupted by a soft hum of delight
“Well, well, look who’s finally awake - our dear sweetheart.” Satoru teases, while Suguru, with his arms crossed, chuckles.
Liquor suddenly nowhere on your mind, your heart races - something about the suggestive gleam in their eyes doesn’t exactly ease your nerves. Your cheeks flare, the room feels suddenly smaller, the air thicker. 
You sit up, rubbing your temples, and the two of them exchange loaded glances that send shivers creeping down your spine.
Satoru pushes himself off the wall with a devious smirk, taking a deliberate step closer. “How’s our sweetheart feeling? You knocked out for a good hour or two, y’know. Was almost worried you’d miss the initiation~”
“What the fuck did I agree to?” you mutter to yourself. Yet, Suguru answers anyway, his voice a dangerous purr, “Just a little test of courage, darling. But don’t you worry; we’ll take very good care of you.”
Satoru nods, his gaze intense. “It’s all in good fun, princess. You’ll see.” His warm breath grazes your face as they tower over you, inching closer and closer. “Now, you wouldn’t go back on your word, would you?”
Goosebumps erupt along your shoulders at the proximity - and the realization - all the way down to where your thighs were desperately squeezing together. Shit.
Gojo Satoru and Geto Suguru. It was hard to be best friends with them for years and not hear about the whispered rumors of how they were in bed. Enough to send a woman to heaven - or the hospital - they said. And you couldn’t deny that ugly little part of you that was sinfully curious.
A beat passes in the suddenly charged air. As if they were waiting. Studying your reaction - like predators stalking their cornered prey. Will you run away? Will you fight? Will you submit to them completely?
The room is silent, except for the distant thump of the music below, seemingly miles away. 
One. Two
Finally - not trusting yourself to speak - you manage a nod. 
Darkened blue eyes meet Suguru’s half-lidded ones, a silent understanding passing between them before resting on you - splayed out on the bed and tight dress hiking up so enticingly.
Oh. 
Oh, shit. You were in for it.
Without warning, Satoru surges forward, lips catching yours in a bruising kiss. You whine against his soft lips, the distinct taste of Baileys and Satoru completely filling your senses - you almost don’t register the slow, purposeful trail of kisses Suguru leaves down your heated neck. Almost.
Skin searing where his lips linger along your jawline, Suguru murmurs, vibrations sending a jolt of electricity right to your core. “Shhh, relax, darling. We’ll take care of everything.”
Maybe it was the way Suguru’s words were dripping in lust and something dangerous, tongue darting out to lick a long, sensual stripe up your neck.
Or maybe it was the way Satoru was sloppily licking at your lips, thumb pushing your chin down to suck on your tongue with his candy lips. But the room was spinning - and this time, it wasn’t the alcohol. 
“T-Toru- Sugu-” a muffled whine you barely even recognize rips from the back of your throat - and it was like something snapped. Maybe their restraint, maybe their sanity - definitely you by the end of this.
A hand hot on your thigh - Suguru’s or Satoru’s? You don’t have the time to wonder, the sequins hit the ground before you even realize what is happening. 
Skin-tight dress now in tatters on Satoru’s carpeted floor, you shudder as the cold air hits your heated skin. Large hands everywhere. Cupping your ass, tweaking your hardened nipples through your bra. Leaving your underwear in such a disarray as if it killed them to see you clothed.
“Shit. Suguru, look at this.” Satoru’s groans lowly, predatory gaze transfixed on the sight of your dripping cunt..
“Oh fuck, darling. Were you all ready and expecting this, hm? Our perfect lil’ slut.” Suguru’s smiles sinfully as he looms closer, a long finger playing teasingly with the thin fabric of your now-soaked panties.
You buck your hips, desperate for more fiction, as a manicured nail lightly grazes your swollen folds. Shit, and you thought Suguru would be the nicer of the two. “Please, Sugu.”
“Now now. Behave, darling. Wouldn’t want to get off on a wrong start to the initiation.” Suguru hums, pulling off your panties completely as Satoru’s iron-hold grip on your hips pin you helplessly to the bed. You struggle pathetically, leaking pussy aching for more more more.
And Satoru - your ever-merciful Satoru - listens to your desperate keens. Because, agonizingly slow, he drops to his knees, eye-level with your quivering pussy. 
“I’ll be taking this as payment, princess.” he hums, hot breath hitting your cunt in a way that almost makes you miss the way he snatches your wet panties right out of Suguru’s hands. As if a prize to be won.
Your face burns at the humiliation - or maybe at the way strong hands wrestle your thighs open. You gasp at the burn of the stretch, tense air grazing your throbbing clit as Suguru lets out a low whistle in appreciation.
You were so exposed. So vulnerable. And these fuckers hadn’t even taken off their goddamn shirts yet. 
Mouth opening to retort - or maybe beg for an ounce of friction, just anything that would-
Bang!
Dazed, you whirl your head towards where the door had now slammed open. In your lust-induced haze, you barely register the notion that someone else was going to see you so spread so shamefully and dripping all over Satoru’s sheets. Ah, they were going to scream. They were going to run away-
“Aww, already started without me?” a deep voice rumbles, raspy, dangerous. “Shit, these two brats weren’t kiddin’, you’re such a doll, aren’t you?” 
Satoru’s smirk grows at the slick pooling at your core as you make out just who it was that stood so imposingly at the door. 
Toji Fushiguro.
Someone you’d heard of more than you’d seen - for several reasons. Known around campus as the long-standing supervisor for Jujutsu Phi, but known more popularly amongst students as the man with a dick to die for.
The shutting of the heavy wooden door reverberates across the electrifying air inside. Your mouth drops into a soft oh as you spot the rock-hard cock straining furiously against Toji’s trousers, a dark patch of precum already pooling at the tip.
Oh. No wonder they say his dick can split you in half. 
Eyes following his every purposeful step towards the bed, you absent-mindedly wonder whether your best friends were hiding a matching achingly hard cocks. 
“Oh, fuck yes. Such a pretty pussy.” Toji appraises your cunt, greedily eyeing the way your walls flutter around nothing, slick pooling where Satoru was but a few inches away from where you needed him the most.
“Yo, old man. Catch.” Satoru’s voice rings in the loaded air. Muscled arms flexing, Toji easily catches the flimsy piece of fabric thrown at him, a lecherous smile growing as he realizes what it is.  “M’gonna have a lot of fun with you, doll.”
“Don’t count us out now, Toji. I’ll be making sure she’s absolutely ruined.” Suguru’s slow, sinful drawl has your head spinning.
Probably for the first time in his life, Satoru doesn’t speak.
Instead, he dives nose-deep in your cunt. Pretty ruby lips meeting your swollen ones, urgently lapping up your sweet juices, as if a man dying of thirst.
“Hah- Oh! Toru!” you whine, hips bucking up into his hot tongue as he bullies past your folds and into your quivering entrance, hurried yet methodical. You could feel Satoru’s lips curling at the lewd whimpers ripping from your throat. Bruising grip on your hips pulling you impossibly deeper onto his greedy tongue. 
He wastes no time - stretching you out on his tongue so sinfully, dipping in and out of your dripping hole at a merciless pace. In and out in and out in and-
“Hope you didn’t forget us, darling. I’d be heartbroken.” Suguru’s mocking words ring in your ears. Not completely present with Satoru’s dizzying abuse on your cunt, you can do nothing as Suguru snakes a hand down to your heated core. 
“Don’t move, doll.” 
And before you know it, two more sets of hands are unforgivingly on you.
All you can do is just lay there and take it as Suguru’s cruel, slender fingers tease your folds, up and down up and down - pointedly skipping your throbbing clit. A languid, sadistic smile spreads across his face as you whine in desperation.
Where Satoru was generous and impatient, Suguru wanted to make you cry. How could you ever have thought he’d be the nice one?
Hasty lips are on yours now, a small scar rubbing your lips in a way that so obscenely reminded you of the tongue still ruthlessly fucking into you right now. Pulling away mere centimeters, Toji murmurs lowly, “Open your mouth.”
As if on auto-pilot, you groan as Toji's steady stream of spit hits your ready tongue. Eyes rolling to the back of your head at the warm feeling, tasting of sin and everything you shouldn’t be doing.
Thick, calloused fingers squeeze your cheeks together, his spit now drooling down the corner of your mouth. “Now, show me what those pretty lips can do.” Toji grits out. 
Your eyes widen as he pulls down his pants just enough for his furiously hard cock to spring free, sculpted thighs straddling the side of your face. 
Thick and unforgiving. A prominent vein twirling delicately down his monstrous length. Precum leaking onto his sculpted abdomen, dripping erotically down to mix with your soaked underwear in his veined hand gripping the base.
Nervous eyes flitting between Toji’s bulging cock in front of you, to the slick dripping down Suguru’s wrist, and Satoru’s hooded eyes, miles away, and grinning devilishly around your cunt - you’re sure of one thing - you’d be damn lucky to make it out alive.
Toji’s throbbing head pokes your kiss-bitten lips, precum salty on your tongue. He spares no mercy.
“C’mon now. If you’re actin’ like such a cockslut then learn to take it like one.” Searing grip on your hair, Toji pushes his cock all the way down your ready throat, using your mouth as if it was nothing more than his favorite fucktoy. Maybe you’ll become his favorite fucktoy.
Your pathetic, wet gurgles mix with the lewd squelches of your cunt as Toji’s heavy balls hit your chin. Fat head hitting the back of your throat and your nose pressed into the tufts of thick, black hair at his pelvis. “Mmm fuck yeah.” he groans, thick fingers pressing around your neck to feel his dick down your throat. 
Drawing low hisses as you tongue at his slit, you breath in the heady scent of Toji and you on your panties and Toji-
“Look s’pretty gagging on his cock, darling.” Suguru’s voice is still silken smooth, mockingly pressing a kiss to your cheek. Pooling the trail of spit and precum on his tongue, before licking a long, languid stripe.
“F-fucking freak.” Toji huffs out a laugh, relishing the way you moan so lewdly around his cock. “Oh? You like that, doll? Little slut, aren’t ya?”
A dangerous chuckle, and he’s thrusting animalistically into your poor, pretty mouth. Balls tightening each time his thick cock disappears into your mouth, lips stretching almost-painfully to accommodate him. Toji’s hand closes tighter around your throat, blocking your airway. Making you choke and gasp for air around his cock, blood roaring in your ears.
Shit, he was going to break you.
Suguru’s clever mouth was on your aching tits now, jolts of electricity going straight to your cunt as he tweaks and teases your hardened nipples. Thumb rubbing harshly over your sensitive tip the way he wouldn’t with your clit. Over and over-
“Suguru, gimme the bra.” you whine, hips bucking as Satoru’s muffled words send vibrations exactly where you wanted.
In a flash, your bra is unclasped and thrown to Satoru. Wrapping it around one large hand, it disappears where you cannot see. Yet the jerky, impatient movements of his hand below - up, up, up - and down have your walls clamping down desperately on Satoru’s tongue.
Ah, he looked so pretty when he was shut up with his mouth full of your dripping cunt. Fucked out whimpers leave Satoru’s throat at each flick of his tongue, fucking your pretty pussy with his mouth till you felt raw.
Suguru - the ever-graceful Suguru - had his brows furrowed desperately. Lips messy with spit as he bites and teases your nipples hard, making you cry out in wet, little gurgles that muffle around the throbbing erection in your mouth, fucking into you with reckless abandon. Toji’s heavy balls stinging your face as he bottoms out with each harsh shove down your throat. 
He didn’t care if you could breathe - as long as you sucked the ever-loving soul out of him.
The heady air is urgent now. Hasty movements now becoming more and more frenzied. Mindless with lust. Filthy. Debauched. It was so fucking sinful. 
So it only made sense that your orgasm was the same.
You see white as you cum - or maybe that was the hot, thick ropes of seed that Toji painted your face with. Moans muffled and hips bucking deliriously, you moan breathlessly as neither of the three men give up their relentless abuse. 
Your head shot up blindly in pleasure, sharp teeth digging into your shoulder - hard enough to break skin. Suguru. 
Wrestled down onto the bed by three sets of strong arms still groping the expanse of your body, you ride out your white-hot high on the taste of Toji slipping down your throat, Satoru’s still merciless tongue, and Suguru’s index finally pressing down on your throbbing clit. Hard. 
Blood roaring in your ears, your vision blurs as you sink into the mattress. You think you’re in heaven, and it was only fitting that these demons with angelic faces were the first things that you see there.
“You alright, darling? Can’t have you go passing out on us mid-initiation, now.” Suguru tuts, sharing a glance with Satoru, who was absolutely dripping in satisfaction - and your slick, prettily glossing his lips and nose.
“Mmm- s’fucked out. Ah-” Your violent climax leaves you limp, and you feel like a fucking ragdoll with the way Suguru wraps a steady arm around your waist, pulling you impossibly close against him. You whine as your stinging tits meet his toned body, sticky with the heat of the room. When did he even take his shirt off? 
Satoru isn’t too far behind, with little care for the buttons flinging across the room as he rips his shirt open - creamy chest peeking out in all its chiseled glory. Shit.
You almost miss the bed shifting as Toji sits on the edge, watching the three of you with greedy eyes as he fists his cum-covered cock with your panties. Teasing, purposeful movements up his length.
Suguru’s hand stroking your face, Satoru’s on your hips.
“After all that princess, you deserve a little treat.” Satoru purrs lowly, lips glistening with your juices and breath hot against your ear. Shivers run along your spine - right down to where he was groping and playfully swatting your ass. Darkened eyes narrowed at the way it jiggled against his large hands. 
“T-treat? Wha-” 
Your disoriented stammers are stuck in your throat as Suguru shoves two long fingers into your mouth. Whatever moans leaving your lips are choked and muffled as he forces you to taste yourself. 
Fingers intertwining with your tongue, you’re delirious with the want for more more more - and evidently, Suguru is too, throbbing and leaking with need as he pushes his soiled boxers down. Something cold makes you flinch as your quivering thigh grazes his clothed erection. 
Oh. Who knew your best friend had a dick piercing?
“Fuck, darling. Really should’ve done this sooner.” he murmurs, voice thick with lust and more to himself than you. “Mhm. You don’t know how hard it was to not bend you over and stuff you till you can’t speak, princess~” a whisper from behind you - Satoru.
Before you know it, Satoru’s lips find yours in a fiery kiss amidst it all. As if he couldn’t get enough of the sweet taste of your cunt - and probably never will. 
Suguru is languid and unhurried where Satoru is impatient and starved, rutting desperately against your ass. 
Every twirl of Suguru’s finger is deliberate, leaving a trail of lingering electricity in its wake. And with searing passion, Satoru’s tongue tastes you in all the ways he possibly could. The three of you tangled in an unholy act. 
Fuck, it was messy. So fucking messy. 
Delicate strings of saliva and slick connecting you to the two as drool drips down the corner of your mouth, eyes scrunched closed at the sinful pleasure.
“Fucking freaks.” Toji spits out, eyeing Satoru’s fingers inching closer and closer to your ass, deftly prodding at your quivering entrance. Yet, his movements only grow more urgent, fucking his fist in desperate need to cum - to cum all over you once more.
Satoru pulls away, and you shiver at the cold feeling of his saliva hitting your rim. Once. Twice. Thrice just to watch the way your hole quivers so obscenely for him. 
In the haze of the pure want of the three men around you, it slowly dawns on you that they won’t stop until they’ve fucked you half to death. And you cunt clenches in anticipation. 
Maybe you really were a little slut. 
Suguru only has his flushed tip kissing your folds, but you already feel so fucking full. Maybe it was the way Satoru was now bullying long, pale fingers through that first, tight little circle of muscle. Scissoring you open, hooking a thumb to stretch your slutty hole till he was more than satisfied. 
Through the corner of your eye, you watch Toji. Eyes half-lidded, gaze locked with yours, and looming closer towards you. 
Before you knew it, a rough hand grasps yours, wrapping so daintily around Toji’s fat, leaking tip. Guiding your hand, thumbing his slit to pull his dick in harsh, mindless pulls to get off. It has your sensitive cunt so heated and dripping, slick trailing down your shaky legs. 
“Suguru, think our little sweetheart is ready? Don’t think I can hold back any longer, all her pretty holes are begging me to fuck her.”
You weren’t going to make it out alive. Maybe you didn’t want to.
He doesn’t wait for a response. Your surprised yelps are gagged on Suguru’s fingers as Satoru sheaths himself in your ready hole. A low groan ripping from his throat as you clamp down on him, struggling to bear with the delicious stretch. Your eyes roll to the back of your head, despite the panic setting in, as he pushes deeper and deeper. Inch by inch. “Fuck s’tight. So tight, princess.”
Was he even halfway in? He had to be, right?
Arm now burning with the feeling of Toji fucking his throbbing erection into your fist, you risk a glance behind you, catching a glimpse of the deliciously flushed cock pressing into you. Long, pale, so pretty - so Satoru. 
Chuckling at the dilemma on your face, Suguru hums. “Now, Satoru. That hardly seems fair. Don’t be greedy.” And at that last word, Suguru’s leaking tip pushes past your entrance - thick , with a long vein running down the middle, cold metal of his piercing making your walls twitch - grunting at the resistance that came with being so fucking full from both ends. 
“Just getting to fucking her already. Look at the pretty doll, so eager to please. She’s begging for it.” you moan at Toji’s impatient comment, his precum coating your hand a pretty gloss. You’re fucking yourself in mindless, shallow, bounces that have you split open on both throbbing cocks. 
Satoru’s hand snaking down to wildly draw circles on your clit, jolting at the overstimulation, whine deliriously as both Satoru and Suguru bottom out inside of you. 
Deep moans bouncing off the walls - tight, so tight. You were going to make them pass out. Or worse, cum before you.
“S’alright hah- Fuck!” Suguru can barely get the words out, you’ve never seen Suguru - all grace and poise - lose his composure like this. A slave to desire. And if Suguru was losing control then Satoru was on the edge of absolute insanity, darkened eyes blown-out and short, broken whines leaving his mouth at each breath.
You, on the other hand, have never felt more awake. 
“Oh- oh fuck. Can’t- Too much. Hngh-” Raspy moans ripping from your throat at each little movement, hips moving in a mindless tandem with your best friends’ as they start thrusting in slow, experimental thrusts. 
You felt so unforgivingly full - organs secondary to the cocks splitting you apart till you could barely form sentences.
Filthy. Fucking filthy. 
And the only place you wanted to be right now.
Pulse banging against your throat, sight spotty, you don’t even know if what you’re feeling is pain or pleasure. Head only full of Satoru and Suguru and Toji and Satoru and-
“Awww, look at her- hah- Cock-drunk little whore can’t even speak.”
Bruised tits bouncing as Suguru and Satoru move in sync, fucked-out, animalistic ramming of their cocks into your stretched out little pussy. Delicate tears stream down your face. Your pace on Toji’s twitching dick now jerky, desperate movements to keep your sanity. “Jus’ like that, doll. Yeah-” 
You could feel the burning stretch as their throbbing cocks rubbed against each other through your walls. Balls smacking against your stinging skin and their prominent veins massaging your snug cunt just right. The slapping of skin and Toji’s squelching have your head spinning.
A wolfish bite on your exposed neck - Satoru - as he tried to keep himself together. Arching you deeper into him, thrusts stemming from a carnal, depraved part of him. Faster.
“Oh. So good, princess. Hole sucking me in so good. Ah- fuck. Could do this for the rest of my life.”
“Nasty girl. You love this, don’t you?” Suguru purrs, amusement evident in his tone.
“Y-yes! Love it! Love it Sugu- Toru-” 
With a harsh slap to your clit, both men speed up their pace in your sloppy holes. Relishing in the precum and slick dripping down their sensitive lengths, and the creamy rings forming around their bases.
More. More. More more more more-
This orgasm is more obscene than the last. Supported by Suguru and Satoru’s strong arms, spread open and stuffed so shamefully by their throbbing erections. Your head is thrown back, voice-shot as broken moans leave your swollen lips. Fist moving in a mindless rhythm - no reason or rhyme.
“F-fuck, darling. Gonna-”
All it takes are your half-lucid, fucked out mewls, walls wrestling with the effort to clench around them, for Suguru and Satoru to slam into you purposefully. Once. Twice. Before spilling into you in unison. 
“Hngh- M’cumming. Oh, god m’cumming, princess. Ah! Milking me so good.”
Thick, hot ropes of cum that fill your snug holes. You could feel your stomach inflating, enough to make you feel like you’ll explode.
Cock-drunk, you’re dead weight in their arms as Suguru and Satoru moan in relief, riding out their highs. Endless spurts of their seed splashing into you. It dribbles out of your overfilled cunt and ass, soiling the wet bed sheets beneath you.
Soaked in their cum, barely conscious, body aching all over. Ah, this was heaven. 
“Switch. Wanna cum in her pretty hole.” 
You jolt as Satoru snarks under his breath, pulling out his still-hard head with a lewd pop! A wave of his hot cum gushing out of your abused hole, pooling so sinfully beneath you.
Your knees buckle, brain not catching up yet. Too fucked out, your ready ass barely resists as Toji presses his rock-hard tip inside, pulsing with need. 
“Yeah, that’s right. Take it.” Grunting lowly, veins popping out as his thick cum spurts uncontrollably from his twitching cock. Once. Twice. Thrice. Missing your hole slightly, splattering on your ass. Pushing his leaking head inside in desperate, shallow thrusts. He just needed it inside you.
Slowing to a stop, “Now, what do you say?”
“Th-thank you, daddy.” 
Vision blacking, you barely even register the words. It’s all that is muttered out before Toji pulls out in one, fluid motion and you’re thrown around like a ragdoll. Suguru’s hand firmly pinning yours behind your back, glistening cock still in you, legs spread sinfully open.
He licks a long stripe down your cheek, your tears salty on his tongue. “Don’t think the initiation’s done yet, darling.”
Cum leaking helplessly out of you, Satoru’s hungry gaze - blue eyes barely recognizable - meets yours. “Oh, fuck. Just look at you princess. So defiled. Makes me wanna eat out all the cum inside you before pumping you full of mine again.”
“Don’t cream yourself just yet, Satoru. I think we’re about to have another initiation coordinator.”
What?
Sure enough, distant footsteps steadily approach. Growing louder with each passing second, thick with anticipation. 
Closer. And closer.
The door is suddenly thrown open, light filtering in through the door, illuminating the stern figure standing in the doorway. 
Nanami Kento.
The frat treasurer, infamous as the devastatingly handsome impersonation of a stick up one’s ass, known for rejecting any and every advance left and right. 
His sharp gaze sweeps the charged room, dark eyes revealing nothing, catching on your teary, fucked out gaze, miles away. Body covered in cum and spit, marked like you were thrown to the wolves. Satoru grits his teeth with an impatient huff, looking like he’s ready to positively devour you, irritated at the interruption. 
“What are you doing? This is an embarrassment to Jujutsu Phi.”
In the twinge of disappointment, you can’t help but feel a brief glimmer of hope. Ah, Nanami Kento. Maybe he will be your savior - a temporary respite from the men who seem ready to eat you alive. And won’t stop till you’re not.  
“If you’re going to initiate her then show no mercy.”
The door slams behind him as he steps inside the heated hellhole. A cold shiver runs down your spine. Satoru’s burning whisper in your ear.
“Welcome to the brotherhood, sweetheart.”
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A/N. Whew this turned out longer than expected. Tried a new formatting thing, how we liking it??
Plagiarism not authorized.
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sonrium · 2 months ago
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DP X DC: A Minor Drinking Problem
Phantom is a relatively new member of the JLA, but it's been a few months, and things are settling in well. He's shy and polite but is a master of the snark with villains.
Before a big mission, the all hands on deck kind, everyone is talking about scars and the crazy stories behind them to distract from the coming fight. Danny, finally feeling like he can join in the conversation with all these adult heroes, pulls off his right glove to show a pretty gnarly scar on the back of his wrist. “I got this one when I fought a guy from the Revolutionary War a few weeks ago! Didn't think he'd charge me with a bayonet.” He shares a couple more stories and scars, but only the ones that he can easily show off.
Because of stories like that and some historical depictions of Phantom from different time periods, they think he's this ancient and powerful immortal that just looks like a teenager, it wouldnt be the first time. He's powerful enough to go toe to toe with Superman, so there's no way he's actually a kid. He even sometimes has the haunted, world weary eyes that their most hardened members only get after experiencing too much. Danny, being our lovable, obliviously dense idiot, has not realized that they think he's an ancient being.
After the mission concludes -it was a rough one-, the JLA celebrate their victory with a couple drinks back at the watch tower. Danny is understandably uncomfortable with this whole situation and keeps asking, “Are you sure I should be here?” They reassure him it's fine as they pass around beers, which Danny politely declines several times. Danny eventually sees this as the perfect chance to pad his blackmail folders on his inebriated coworkers.
Anyway, as the night goes on, they have a good time, but Phantom still hasn't gotten a drink like the rest of them, and Green Lantern (or hero of your choice) really wants their shy friend to come out of his shell. So, he slams an open beer bottle on the coffee table in front of Phantom. “Come on Phantom! Let loose a little. Celebrate!”
“Dude! What the hell?! I'm 16! That's illegal!” Phantom squeaks in shock.
“We don't care how old you were when you died. It's how long you've been a ghost that counts.” Flash slings an arm around Danny's shoulders from where he’s sat next to him on the couch. Flash can't get drunk, but he also thinks it would be fun to see their uptight new member drunk.
“That's even worse! You'd be giving alcohol to a two year old!” Phantom is horrified that his coworkers are so casually breaking the law.
“But you said you fought in the Revolutionary War this morning!” Green Lantern said with his eyebrows knit in confusion.
“No, I said I fought someone from the Revolutionary War. As in, the ghost of someone from the revolutionary war!”
“You can't pull that on us. There's murals and stuff of you from thousands of years ago.” The Flash waves off with a laugh.
Phantom’s finger presses painfully hard into Flash’s chest. “I do not need to explain time travel to you of all people. My mentor hates you, and I'm STILL sent on missions constantly to clean up your messes.” Phantom's clear and low. Flash liked it better when he was shouting and not staring him down like a predator with narrowed eyes.
(This random idea popped into my head. It made me laugh, so I thought you might, too. Here you go!)
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bulkheadbignaturals · 20 days ago
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GOODRA ART POST GOODRA ART POST EVERYBODY REJOICE AND CHEER
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The brainrot has spread so much i am now making my own Transformers AU
Here's my designs for the main Autobot cast! (for now...... Also i can't design cars for SHIT)
#I ACCIDENTALLY EXITED OUT FROM THE REBLOG EDIT THING ON MOBILE WITHOUT SAVING AND IT DELETED ALL THE TAGS I HAD PUT DOEN PREVIOUSLY#FUCK!!!! PAIN AND MISERY ON PLANET CYBERTRON#I remember what tags I put in originally tho so yay#LOVING the yellow optics you gave Optimus Prime; super nice change of pace from the usual sky blues we usually get!#I like yellow-y golden eyes/optics on characters in general they’re so pretties#Oppy also looks hella intimidating as well too great heavens#smoke stack shoulder guards… hehehe truck#also loving his teensy helmet finials too!! they’re so shapes /pos#ABSOLUTELY GOING BONKERS OVER ARCEE’S DIGITIGRADE LEGS I AM OVER THE MOOOON ABT THEM#digitigrade legs on robots… highest peak of robot character design one can go for imo I love when ppl draw bots with em#she looks like she could beat ur ass too and I’m all here for it; Arcee deserves to slay both in looks AND in combat. as a treat#and BUMBLEBEEEEEEEE my beloved bug scout minibot#absolutely loving how you leaned into a more bug-like design for Bee here he looks so kind his eyes are so soft… hes sweetheart awh :(#he gets his horns AND his lil feelers too and I am ALL here for it; best of both worlds let’s BEE honest here#I am so (not) sorry for that pun btw I had a chance and you better BEElieve I took it#I JUST NOTICED HIS TINY BEE STINGER TAIL AWH….. he’s so cute I need to squish him in my hands RAHHHHH#JAZZ!!!!!!!! THERES MY FAVORITE SHMOOVIN’ GROOVIN FUNKY FORMER#I ADORE the sound equalizer bar displays on his limbs btw they fit him so well he deserves to look swag#THE HORN EARS AND DOORWINGS AND VISOR TOO AW HELL YEAH#loving the lil goatee and headphones you gave Jazz too he looks like such a fun guy to hang out with#AND FINALLY…. LAST BUT NEVER LEAST……… RATCHETTTTTTTTT 🚑‼️‼️🗣️🚑🚑‼️🗣️‼️🚑‼️🗣️‼️🚑‼️🗣️‼️#you captured his grumpy ex-veteran field medic grandpa energy SO WELL GOODRA I love himmmmmm#his clouded optic and his facial scars and chipped helmet chevron… oh honey who did this to you#THE AMBULANCE HOOD TUMMY. OHHHHH MY GODDDDDDDD /VPOS#LOVE IT WHEN PEOPLE DRAW RATCHET WITH A BEER BELLY IT FITS HIM SO WELL MAN I am 100% for fat Ratchet with a beer belly#get that old ambulance some MEAT on his OLD GOD DANG BONES AND JOINTS ya hear me!!!!!!!!!!!!! /pos#ohhhhh Goodra my dear old friend I am so deeply and completely in love with ur TF designs here ough /gen#ABSOLUTE 100/10 DESIGNS HERE IM OVER THE MOON ABT THEM ALL ITS HARD TO PICK A SINGLE FAVORITE#man I love Transformers so much I wish cars were real
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emphistic · 3 months ago
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can i request smth like sukuna bringing reader to meet his family for the first time? ^^
"Uncle Sukuna bought me these Legos for my birthday last week!" Yuuji pointed to a dinosaur on the shelf, "It took me a long time to build it, but Uncle helped me."
The kid had been dragging you around the house ever since dinner was over, holding your hand while insisting on showcasing all of his toys and artwork and racecars.
Sukuna was always a man of few words, so when you first met Yuuji, you thought the cute little bugger would be no different. But no, Yuuji was far from shy and quiet around you. In fact, the first thing he said to you after you entered the house was a bunch of garbled and unintelligible compliments. Saying how he liked your shoes, and the hairstyle you did on yourself.
He talked and talked your head off with no care in the world. Dinner passed quickly, and Yuuji led you upstairs to show you his room. You found it adorable that he had a little twinkle in his eyes while explaining something he was passionate about; it reminded you of a special someone.
"That's so cool, Yuuji! Do you have a favorite Lego that you've made?" you smiled.
Yuuji seemed to grow silent for the first time that evening, "Umm, no. I think they're all my favorite!"
Laughing, you ruffled his hair. "That's okay," you booped him on the nose, "you're my favorite."
Yuuji looked up at you with eyes the size of saucers, gasping, "Really? More than Uncle?"
You put a finger to your lips, making a shushing sound; and Yuuji giggled at the fact he shared a secret with you. When the adults started opening beer and wine bottles in the living room, Sukuna called you downstairs to join him as he drank with his brother and his brother's wife.
"I'm going to go have a drink—"
"That's okay! I have to do something, too." Yuuji playfully kicked you out of his room with a few giggles, and got to work on whatever it was he was doing.
Downstairs, you had a better chance to get to know Sukuna's family now that there wasn't a little kid trying to butt his way into the conversation as well. Jin asked you about your work and how you and his brother met; you talked about some of your hobbies and Sukuna—being himself—boasted about how good of a partner you were. It was, all in all, a pleasantly spent evening.
When it was time for you to call it a night, you were about to make your leave when suddenly, Yuuji came running down the stairs, yelling for you and Sukuna to wait.
"What is it, brat?" asked Sukuna, tired from having a beer too many, which earned an elbow to his side from you.
Yuuji beamed, gesturing to what was in his hands, "Look, tada! It's Uncle, and me, and Mom, and Dad, and my aunt!"
Turns out, when Yuuji said he had some thing to do, he was really just building characters out of Legos that represented you, Sukuna, and his parents. Surprisingly, the models were pretty accurate, too. Well, except for. . .
"The hell did you make a redhead for? That supposed to be your uncle, kid?" Sukuna joked, turning to you, "Don't tell me your cheating on me with a ginger."
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fleshphagus · 1 year ago
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fakebwitch · 12 days ago
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rafe brings with him a photo of your ass
you remember taking that photo as a joke, as usual you just wanted to tease him. and in what a better way if not by taking a picture of your ass. you had just come out of the shower, simply wearing a pair of underwear, you took the polaroid you have had for years and you took the photo, once it got out of the camera you took it between your fingers, looking at it with a grin.
while he was busy you took the opportunity to put it in his jacket pocket that you knew he would wear the next morning, you smiled as you threw yourself on the bed, satisfed with your work.
the next morning rafe left the house, he would have spent the whole morning in the company of topper and kelce on the golf course. while they were drinking a cold drink, after a long practice under the sun, kelce asked rafe, “bro, do you have one of your business card? i’ve got a friend who would be interested in meeting you” rafe put down the fresh beer, always ready when talking about business, nodding “yeah”.
he put his hand in his jacket pocket, finding a piece of paper, he took it out and luckily before passing it to kelce he checked it. the photo of your ass was definitely not his business card. his jaw clenched as he took a few more seconds to observe the polaroid, his dick twitching in his pants. “what’s wrong man?” asked topper with a confused face, exchanging a look with kelce, “it’s not this” simply replied rafe, taking out the wallet, putting the photo inside it. he was grateful that neither topper nor kelce had the chance to see the photo, or there would be problems.
“here it is” he said as he took out one of the small card from his wallet, handing it to kelce, “thanks man” replied kelce, putting it in his wallet.
for the rest of the morning rafe was not focused at all, almost all the balls he threw landed meters away from the hole, without centering it, or he paid the slightest attention to his two friends, barely concentrating on what they were talking about, not that he cared, his mind kept returning to the polaroid.
as soon as he could he took out his wallet, only to look for a few seconds at the photo, the way your ass looks so plump and delicious, he couldn’t help but fix his dick in his pants. he was so close to running away without saying anything, speeding home and fucking you for hours.
he had openly expressed to you how obsessed he was with that photo, and to be honest you didn’t think that after finding it in his jacket he would decide to continue keeping with him. every time he opened his wallet, to take out one of his cards or money his eyes meet your ass, and he had to fight a smile that threatened to come out.
when he needed you more, but you weren’t there, he used that photo to jerk off, working his hand up and down quickly, his tip red and swollen, slimy sounds emitted by his hand moistened by his pre-cum while he kept moaning, he was fucked. he was careful when he came, to make sure it didn’t end up on the polaroid, not wanting for anything in the world it to get ruined.
when he was on a few outings with his friends, busy chatting with a beer in their hand, he kept himself out of the speech, took his wallet out of his pants pocket, not caring what his friends might think, and stared at the polaroid, his cock hardened in his pants, and he knew that in a few minutes he would have to apologize to go to the bathroom to take care of it.
even when it came to work, at some important meeting, when the situation became too heavy, too many problems for his tastes, he took out his wallet, being careful to keep it under the table, no one but him had to have access to the photo, he admired it, wishing that at that moment he was fucking you from behind, while you begged him not to stop.
once his friends had made fun of him, noticing how much time he spent staring at his wallet. “bro what you got in there? too much money you can’t stop looking at ‘em” joked kelce, causing laughter even from the others, rafe rolled his eyes, looking up from the polaroid to look at him, “nahh he probably got sum freaky shit in the-” before the guy who had stupidly decided to talk could finish the sentence, rafe interrupted him “the fuck is you talkin’ about, shut your fucking dumbass mouth.”
once you had made fun of him, complaining about the fact that he was too obsessed with that photo, that maybe you should have torn it off, and goddamn he was almost on the verge of crying, listing all the reasons why you shouldn’t have to tear it, almost begging you not to do it. he couldn’t help himself, he almost drooled every time he saw it, once you gave it to him you couldn’t take it away. he treated it carefully, as if it were a piece of gold, he was just so obsessed with your ass, that photo was all he needed. he was a happy man.
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