#Yes I am very mad about political shit

[missmics]

When I had Alastor briefly muse on this in the latest chapter of my adoption fic I meant it in reference to him having raised Charlie in Great Depression era America

Funny how things go.

[rumisgf]

— ATTRACTIVE THINGS HE SAYS/DOES

includes: katsuki bakugou, denki kaminari, shoto todoroki

warnings: college!au, black reader obv, suggestive, she/her pronouns used once

KATSUKI BAKUGOU

you can try to get pouty or sassy with him if you want to, but it is not a game you will win. one thing he likes is checking yo ass (cs he knows you secretly get a kick out of it).

“fix that attitude ‘fore i fix it for you.”

and he does not let you smart mouth him at all. he’s the sassy one, not you babes.

“what’chu say?”

you start trynna cuss at him or give him more attitude? he’ll deadass look to the left, to the right, behind him, then look back at you and be like “oh, you talkin’ to me?”

“ay, watch yo mouth.”

possessive in not a toxic way but still obvious

he cares a lot about your grades and he’ll memorize your classes so if you decide to skip a day or two, he’s texting you making sure you at least did your work

and like y’all are still in highschool, he’ll deadass take your phone if you need to catch up and keep it in his pocket

“uh uh, yer not gettin’ this back until you finish. we clear, baby?”

unconsciously flexes his jaw when he stretches

digs his tongue into his cheek whenever he’s focused and furrows his eyebrows

bakugou manspreading. that’s all.

if he sees someone trying to flirt with you he will deadass laugh in their face

moves you out of the way by grabbing your waist

if he wants you to sit with him he simply pats the spot next to him (or sometimes his lap) and is like “c‘ mere”

if you couldn’t tell, yeah he likes to give orders (☺️)

speaking of orders, knows your food order from every place you like by heart

and is the one who sends your food back if they get your order wrong

“yo, excuse me! yeah send this shit back she didn’t want pickles on her shit.”

he actually talks to older adults very respectfully

as he got older, he matured and his manners towards his professors is definitely one of the things that swept you off your feet

DENKI KAMINARI

he knows damn well when you missed him and loves to be especially affectionate just to have you all shy under his touch and with his words

“hi pretty babyy”

“aww, am i making you nervous?”

“you miss me my princess?”

“you’re real cute, y’know that?”

when you achieve something like learning how to play a game he’s showing you or doing good on an exam he always says things like “see, there you go” “good job, baby ‘m so prouda you”

he’s very attentive to you, he lets you be clingy whenever you want

taps his pencil gently with his fingers or plays with his rings whenever he’s trying to focus hard on something

then when he’s confused he runs his fingers through his hair with furrowed eyebrows and his lips pouted up

always responds with “yes, baby?” whenever you say his name to get his attention

and to make sure he’s not neglecting you all the time when he sits down to play video games he has you either cuddled up in his lap, sitting between his legs on the floor, or laying your head on his lap depending on how he’s sitting

no matter who he’s with always greet you with “hi baby” or “hey babe”, he has absolutely no shame showing affection to you

definitely participate in all those tiktok slideshows where people show off they girlfriends

pulls you into his lap by the waist

<< his morning voice 33

getting to go to the gym with him or at least see him after he goes to the gym is a true blessing bc his messy hair immediately makes him 10x hotter

always hugs you tightly and wraps both arms around your body

and loves hugging you from behind

hypes up every post you make and spams your comments

SHOUTO TODOROKI

when he gets mad it makes you feel all hot, especially because it’s rarely directed at you

his voice. that’s all.

he’s so polite and treats you like the highest human being on earth (as he should)

“are you alright, my love?”

“i’m so sorry my angel, let me make it up to you please.”

“here, i’ll carry that for you love.”

“goodnight my princess, i’ll be dreaming about you.”

he hugs you with his whole body, making sure he can feel every inch of your skin pressed up on his.

and he makes you do it to, pulling you in by your waist flush against his stomach.

makes sure to hold your hand every time he’s walking you somewhere because your safety is a priority to him

always ask before he does things, he hates feeling like he’s making you uncomfortable. “can i kiss you?” “is this okay? “you sure you want to, lovely?”

contrary, to popular belief he’s way too good at eye contact

and then gets confused when you become all flustered even though he’s staring into your eyes as you speak

“what’s wrong? is there something on my face?”

but eventually you admit how nervous it makes you, and he takes note

so now, he especially looks you in your eyes during conversation

“hmm? go ahead sweetheart i’m listenin’.”

whenever he’s studying for an upcoming exam, he leans back more in his seat and when he goes to stretch, his shirt lifts up and reveals his lower stomach

he comes well dressed no matter how bad of a day he’s having or what time he woke up

whenever he walks in a room, trust he got that shit on (because he’s way too rich to be dressed like a fool)

his dorm is always clean: bed’s always made, has a specific shelf for school supplies, etc

him cursing. that's all.

whenever you fall asleep on his chest he holds you tight under his free arm with his hand over your head, just because he wants so bad to protect you

in general tends to be protective

keeps a hand on your waist at events, walks next to the road on the sidewalk and will make sure you dont, puts his hand in front of you if the car stops too hard, all that

© rumisgf

[leviraaaaaa]

“Levi!”

You barge through the door, all dramatic, gasping and panting, purposely exaggerating to get his attention. But not to your surprise, he didn’t even bother looking up.

“I suppose no one ever taught you, but there’s a concept called knocking.” He said, his eyes fully focused on the papers. His hand moving across it as he wrote. “It’s quite easy really, you raise your hand and—”

“Levi!” You cut him off, slamming the door behind you loudly. “Levi, my beloved, my savior in dark times, I am in need of your help.”

“Slamming the door isn’t very polite either. Your manners get worse everyday.”

You waved him off, shushing him. You made way across the room, where a couch sat not far from the desk he was sitting on, and flopped down face first. “Levi.” Your voice came out muffled.

“Ah yes, making yourself home I see.” He sighs.

“Levi, I need your help. Real bad.”

“No.”

“What–” You look up, raising your face from the cushions, offended. “You didn’t even–”

“No.” He repeated, eyes not leaving his work for even a second. “Please, get off my couch. Cleaning it is tiresome.”

“Levi.” You whined, impatient at his aloofness. “Levi, he’s going to kill me.”

“I’ll buy you a good coffin.”

“This isn’t funny.” You huffed. “I’m dead. Like literally. Absolutely. This is where it all ends.”

“I’d rather you not die on my couch.”

“Fuck your couch.” You flipped yourself, so you splayed on your back now. You tilted your head, staring at him. “Help me out. Please?”

Levi finally turns to look at you, unable to ignore you any longer. He frowned. “What?” He asked warily. “What did you do this time?”

“Promise me you’ll help me first.” You said.

“No.” He immediately rejects you. “What did you do? Did you get into a fight with an MP again?”

You shook your head.

“Blew up something in Hange’s lab?” He guessed.

“No. But I’d really rather it was Hange mad at me though.”

He looked at you confused, “Who did you piss off then? “

You grimaced. He was quick to conclude.

“Ah.” He realizes. “Erwin.”

A nod from you answers him.

“What did you do?”

“Ask me what I didn’t do.”

“What didn’t you do?”

“Work.” You sat up. “In my defense, it was a shit load of work. And I hate paperwork. And I kept procrastinating. And now it’s due by tomorrow and I didn’t remember until two minutes ago when Erwin shot a glare at me. And now I—”

“I’m not helping you.”

“Why not?” You demanded.

“It’s your fault. Don’t drag me into this shit.” He grumbles, scowling. “And you promised last time, you wouldn’t do this anymore. I’m not doing your work for you. I have enough on my plate.”

“Okay first of all, I’m not lazy. I was busy–”

“Ogling Garrison captains.”

“They’re pretty. And no, not the point, shut up.” You protested. “I was busy. And I didn’t come here so you could do it for me. I came here so you could go and talk to Erwin.”

Levi frowned, “Talk to him about what?”

“Tell him to give me one more day. Swear I’d work my ass off.”

“You said that last time too.” He pointed it out. “How angry is Erwin?”

You made a face. “Bad.”

“How bad?”

“He keeps glaring at me everytime I meet him. It’s the ‘if you don’t get it done this time, you’re gonna get in so much shit’ glare. It’s creeping me out.”

Levi scoffs, shaking his head. “Only you." He said. "Only you can possibly manage piss fucking Erwin off. The guy's a fucking monk, nothing affects him.” He pinches the bridge of his nose. “If I had to guess, I’d say this isn’t the first time asking for an extension.”

“Err…” You ducked your face. “It was kinda supposed to be done 2 weeks ago.”

“2 weeks?” Levo looked at you incredulously. “No wonder he’s pissed. And you’re asking for more time?”

“One more day. Just one more day. Please Levi, he’ll listen to you.”

Levi stares at your pleading expression for a few seconds with narrowed eyes, considering. Thinking. Then he seemed to have made up his mind.

“No.”

“Wha—” You jerk upright. You really thought you’d convinced him.

“No. I’m not getting you out of the grave this time. Specially since you dug it yourself.” He returns his attention back to his work. “Good luck to you, but leave now. And learn a damn lesson.”

You stared at him, gaping. “Wow," You blinked you’re an asshole.”

“Congratulations for realizing that.”

You exhaled. Easy words won’t work, you knew. So, here comes plan A. Acting.

You pouted.

“Don’t look at me like that. I said what I said.”

You fluttered your lashes, all wide shiny eyes, about to cry.

“Get out before I start throwing shit at you.”

“Levi.” Plan B. Bribing.

“No.”

“Leeviii.”

“No.”

“Levi, aren’t you the sweetest, most dearest, my absolute favorite and delightful and super awesome with extra sugar on top bestiest best friend? Don’t be like that, c’mon.”

“Still no. And we’re not friends.”

“‘I’ll make you pie?” You offered.

“You can’t cook to save your life. No.”

"I'll give you hugs."

"I will slap you."

“Levi.” Plan C. Threatening.

He glares back at you.

"You do realize you could've used this time getting the report started instead of trying to convince me and actually might've manage to get it done?”

“I’ll read poetry to you.” You threatened.

Levi looks up, finally there’s a hint of alarm on his face. “No, you won’t.”

“I’ll make sure all your food touch.”

“Get out.”

“I’ll disorganize your bookshelf and fill it with those titan x scout love novels.”

He raised his middle finger at you.

“I will start telling you about all my exes.”

He cringed visibly.

Finally, you gave up. Dragging yourself off the couch, you slowly, pathetically, miserably made your way to the door. You knew that the odds were very low that Levi would actually help you this time, because he was right. You needed to learn a lesson. And it was your fault.

“Oi.”

Your hand was on the doorknob. “What?” You turned to look at him grumpily.

Levi was pinching the bridge of his nose, knitting his eyebrows together, irritated and annoyed. Like he was about to do something he regretted.

He let out a long exhale.

“Bring it here. I’ll help you.”

“What?” You asked, disbelief dripping from your tone. Were you dreaming?

“I’ll help you out. Just this time.” He grunts. “Don’t expect it again. And I’ll only guide you, you’re doing the most of it.”

Music to your ears.

“Really?”

“Go before I change my mind.” He huffed.

You broke into a wide grin, beaming up at him. “No wonder I love you.”

“The feeling is not mutual.”

“You’re the best,”

“Shut up.”

“The best. The most darling, the loveliest, the coolest, the–”

“10 seconds. I’m giving you 10 seconds.”

“Oh–” Your eyes widened. You learnt the hard way Levi usually means his time limits. “Okay, okay, wait here, wait. I’ll be right back. Just–”

And you were out the door,

“Fucking idiot.” He groaned to himself, as you yet again, slammed the door.

He wish he knew why he kept doing this to himself.

[thebibliosphere]

From what I've seen, I think the Batkids would like your book.

Hunger Pangs? You flatter me.

But also, yes thank you for this particular strain on self-indulgent brain rot. I am going to be absolutely abnormal about this.

I’d like to imagine Dick picks it up at an airport somewhere on his way back from a trip and becomes hooked on the “clever, pretty, jumps-from balconies-for-the-thrill-of-the-fall vampire and goes, “oh, same.”

The fact that it’s got a rugged, soldiery werewolf with a heart of gold who enforces self-care as a form of kink-play is also doing stuff to his brain. (That’s a thing? He can… he can ask someone for that? Who does he ask for that? It’s been weeks since he slept more than a few hours and ate more than cereal for dinner. Seriously, who does he ask? How much is it? He’s got money. He’ll pay.) The uh, the need for validation and the budding praise kink is also hitting a little too close to home.

As is “all powerful witch with the power to pick you up with her mind and throw you around like a rag doll.” (LiStEN, he spent a large chunk of his formative years surrounded by tight spandex suits, villains with sexy mind control pollen and getting kidnapped and tied up every other week. It’s not his fault he’s Like This.)

He’s not mad about it, though.

*

Babs catches him re-reading it during downtime. She’s not even that interested, more asking what it is to be polite, but the way Dick jumps and turns red, like he didn’t even realize she was in the room is… intriguing.

“I can see why you like it,” she says, several days later, casually drinking her coffee while Dick stares straight ahead, willing the floor to open up and swallow him whole. “Magic, politics. Saving the world from certain doom with the power of knowledge and ecological preservation.” She glances sideways at him. “Vlad’s got some interesting quirks.”

“Shut up.”

“Are we sure you’ve not been compromised?”

“Babs, I mean it.”

“Mean what?” Tim appears in the kitchen as though from nowhere, pouring a red bull into the coffee pot.

No one tries to stop him.

“Dick’s reading a new book,” Babs says, ignoring the murderous look Dick sends her way.

“Oh? What book? Is it any good?”

“Uh, yeah, uh.” Dick rubs at the back of his neck, glaring daggers at Babs as she rolls out of the room, cackling. “It’s uh, romance. Kind of silly actually…”

“Oh?”

Dick nods. “It’s got a vampire and a werewolf. Two guys. And a… well she’s just sort of magic. They break into a library to save the world from ecological disaster. They’re all bi. Together. Or they will be in the next book. This one’s more about the vampire and the werewolf getting together. Um...”

Tim’s gone very still in the way he does when his brain has caught hold of something and he’s absolutely about to let it consume him. “Oh?”

“Yeah.” Dick shrugs. “It’s got some kink in it,” he warns, not wanting to expose his younger brother to something he’s not ready for. Which is ludicrous because he’s Robin. And from the way Tim’s not drinking his ‘coffee’ he can tell this is only going to go one way no matter what he says. He brightens, remembering something. “But there’s, like, a non smutty version too? Or a less smutty version, I guess? I don’t know, I haven’t read it yet. I could, we could go to the bookstore, maybe stop at the art store too…”

“I’ll meet you in the car.”

*

“So,” Jason says, and Dick can already tell where this is going by the shit-eating grin on his face. “Vampires, huh? Or is it more the werewolves you’re into?”

“Who told you?” Dick bemoans. “Was it Babs?” He bets it was Babs. Fucking Babs.

“Oh, no one told me anything Boy Wonder. Tim found out the author has a go-fund-me for some medical shit that exceeded his monthly allowance and he’s been harassing Bruce to “fix it” for several days now. He’s down in the cave making a nuisance of himself right now. Apparently he quote “needs more of the bisexual monster books Dick told him about” unquote, and the author can’t do shit if she up and fucking dies because this country’s a fucking for-profit shit hole.”

Dick places his head in his hands. “Oh, God. Is Bruce mad? He’s mad, isn’t he?”

Jason shrugs. “Couldn’t tell you. Last I heard, Tim was playing him the audiobook over the bat computer to make his case.”

Dick let’s his head thump against the table. This is it. This is his villain origin story. He’s going to run away and join the Rogues. Or maybe he’ll go back to the Circus. Either option is better than the idea of having to meet Bruce’s eye later over the dinner table.

“Personally, I thought the plot was a little weak but the characters are compelling,” Jason says, sipping his herbal tea. “I liked the chill necromancer doctor. I feel like he’d be able to fix me.”

[can-you-stomach-it]

I am a bitter transmasc and I am HAPPY to see Somerton being called out as the shit person he is. But I am also MAD. Trans content creators called out his plagiarism YEARS ago and nobody cared! But now that a cis person points it out, they believe.

Edit: I do not hold any ill feelings toward Hbomb. I have enjoyed his channel for years, and I think his video was well researched and he used his platform excellently to adress something very unjust.

What I meant with this post is just what I wrote. I am mad that whenever Somerton's fans were told about the plagiarism, they responded by ignoring or ranting about how it was all a misunderstanding. Even when evidence was provided.

Not saying this was the one and only reaction. But I personally had people be incredibly rude to me when I politely tried to explain why I didn't like Somerton and cited cases where he had stolen from trans people.

Yes, it's true that the reason why he was able to get away with this was that he stole from people with much smaller platforms. But I also believe that the credibility and good faith given to him is RARELY afforded to people in the LGBT community who are not like him.

Let me be bitter about the fact that cis white men can get thousands of dollars by ripping off the work of more vulnerable folks.

[moonshynecybin]

So I am rewatching Argentina 2018 just for giggles, also because you posted about it recently.

And. Wow. Yeah. All the bad omen sirens flashing right from the comical start delay. Committing grid crimes as if the world and officials cant see.

Commentators going - Marc is gonna be angry, marc needs to be careful (when Marc hadn't even started his black widow strut), marc just needs to be patient. Immediately followed by Marc shoving Aleix off. Getting penalized and having to give back a position. But he was in the middle of creating havoc among 5 riders and dint know which position he had to give back. Like. Imagine. Having to apologise for slaying someone but you slayed so bad you don't know which one you need to apologise to. I don't know if I am embarrassed for Marc or the riders. Marc with the kill bill siren in his head just bullying his way up.

The commentators just alternating between "marc needs to calm down" & "this is bloody carnage". It's so funny because the commentators are actually rooting for Marc, "Marc just needs to be careful and keep the pace, he can easily get 5 if he keeps it clean". Marc just hitting fastest lap times at p13.

"these are just sitting ducks in from of Marc"

"marc moving past them as if they were standing still"

Marc just bearing down the grid like the spectre of riders worst grid nightmares. Vale just minding his biz, having himself a race. Here comes a raging scrappy ant.

I unfortunately stayed on to watch the end, witnessed Uccio shooing away Marc, broke my heart a bit

Argentina was just a no good, sad, bad day for Marc.

Was it Marc's fault, yes. Does every rider have such a day, yes. Is it an excuse, no.

But it reminds me of when Enea caused that incident and Marc was the only one who said, it happened, it's fine, he will learn from it. The grace to understand. But maybe he is harsher when it's himself impacted.

Has anyone committed race crimes against Marc? Cant quite recall how he reacts. Has he called anyone a danger to the sport or something equally harsh? Or has he always been the messiest queen on the grid.

people commit on track crimes against marc and he turns into jimmy buffet. hes suddenly chilled out on a beach in a loose linen shirt with his perfectly smooth legs tanning in the sun he is CHILL. brewski in HAND ugly sunglasses ON. like i think marc is ACUTELYYY aware that he would be a hypocrite to go after people for on track crimes so he defaults HARD to the "this is racing" doctrine. it protects him to be this way! a political stance. like for instance jorge martin ends marc's last race with honda by doing extremely stupid shit and he SWAPS HELMETS WITH HIM right after. like he knowssss how he is on track, he doesnt pretend. and also i think thats just kind of how he's built! able to understand that on-track is on-track and thats that.... which is kind of crazy, because he has so much empathy for when people commit on track crimes against him (he KNOWS he would do the same) but not when they get mad at him for doing track crimes unto THEM. i think its a mix of self protection and also just being very very crazy <3

[utilitycaster]

forgive me if i don’t make sense bc i don’t really know how to articulate this, but taliesin talked a lot about “trying to figure out what punk means in exandria” and wondering what’s there to be angry about. and after the last string of episodes i feel like that it’s a question that he baked into ashton’s character. like yes ashton is punk and they have justified anger but the Rest of their anger is deflective to stop them from interrogating themselves and their decisions further. idk it’s really interesting to me

It is! It's something I really love about Ashton and it's something I think Taliesin was very thoughtful about in his character creation. I think Taliesin is extremely strong in character creation in general, and it's a rare person who can make a character based on a philosophical premise who also feels very real.

That really is the core of Ashton, and I think it's a great commentary. I do still intend to watch The Decline of Western Civilization Part III (winter break perhaps?) but I am broadly familiar with the gutter-punks on which Ashton was based, and again, the punk movement as a whole. There have always been politically-minded punks; but I advise you look up the backgrounds of, say, the average Fugazi/Minor Threat, Bad Religion, Dead Kennedys, or Propagandhi musician because they are, by and large, middle-class white guys with relatively stable and happy childhoods, and the idea of Ashton as someone dedicated to the Tumblr uwu kindness is punk "look at this perfect baby who doesn't steal pennies how kind and generous to only take literally everything else" archetype was always a massive projection. They've always been far more in the model of the Break Shit, Get Wasted punk than, well, the straight edge and veganism of the above.

(I also think that while it's true that a lot of punk houses did take in anyone and were something of a refuge for many a la Color In Your Cheeks, there was also a lot of Missing Stair Fallacy shit going on in the punk community even then. Ashton is in fact an example of the flaws in that sort of subculture: the Nobodies were there until they really, really weren't, and that's not unusual for that kind of punk friendship. It's found family until you're too inconvenient and dangerous to make it worth it. Taliesin explores this a lot, incidentally; that was very much what he was doing with Molly, and I would love to hear him talk about that kind of surface-level closeness that isn't strong enough to stick because as someone who both participates in fandom and loves to observe and analyze fandom as a phenomenon itself, it's a very real dynamic.)

Ashton has had an awful life. That's the premise. Nothing good has happened to them. There are plenty of valid reasons for them to be angry. Some are people who deserve it (their parents for the fucked up ritual; the Nobodies for abandoning them; Jiana Hexum for exploiting them), some are people who don't deserve their anger but to be fair haven't done anything to deserve their respect either (Percy, the gods), but many have been perfectly kind and reasonable and Ashton has rejected them because they're in a position of authority or seemed too nice. And there's plenty of stuff he's mad about that isn't easily pinned on anyone; the chronic pain is a shitty side effect of one or both of his traumas but no one person is responsible.

Ashton is an incredibly cynical person, and this extends to himself. As I've said before, I think they absolutely mean it when they say that they would have done the exact same thing the Nobodies would do, and this has been used to both cover up the intense hurt that came from their abandonment, but also, I think part of Ashton's own self-loathing comes from the fact that yeah, they are the kind of person who'd have done the same, and that isn't a very good person, and being angry at the Nobodies and Jiana and the world at large has allowed him to avoid looking that truth in the face. Ashton has always bounced between "I'll be the best broken thing I can be" and "what if I could be more? what if I could be what I could have been if things went well?" and also "who the fuck cares" and the reveal, that when the chips are down, he will make an ill-advised and self-destructive choice from that place of pain and anger has really rattled them. He can't keep just being angry and using that to shield himself from difficult questions. It won't just kill them, but it will hurt everyone around them too.

A really ugly truth of life is that even when something is completely not your fault and even when you have been dealt a rotten, unfair hand, often, you do have some degree of responsibility to deal with it ("And if it isn't my fault, I certainly didn't do anything to deal with it," as Ashton says.) The mere act of being angry is cathartic but doesn't actually solve anything. I think that's Keyleth's message to Orym, actually; it's not fair, and you're angry that it's not fair, but you need to use that anger to do things yourself instead of letting it consume you or passing the buck because it sure as hell isn't your turn. Ashton has, since the solstice, been playing tug of war with the idea that this anger has perhaps not been serving him, and he finally lost. Initially they realized a lot of this anger had been self-pity, but then, as they said, one week of thinking their parents actually were something led them to do the exact same dumb cult shit. Instead of stopping and listening to Evontra'vir and Allura, he said "no, I'm special, actually." And to be clear I think their motives were incredibly complicated and well-thought-out on Taliesin's part. It's not just because of his parents, it's not entirely selfish or out of heroics but those certainly did play a part, he did genuinely think it would help but he also ignored a number of warnings that it wouldn't. Again, I think the parallels between Ashton and FCG are glaringly obvious this episode, except Ashton hid their feelings with anger and FCG with a focus on everyone else's needs.

[rosaline-black]

ᴄᴏꜰꜰᴇᴇ ꜱᴛᴀɪɴᴇᴅ ᴄᴀʀᴅɪɢᴀɴ - ʀᴇᴍᴜꜱ ʟᴜᴘɪɴ

Category: Remus Lupin X fem reader

Summary: University muggle AU- Remus bumps into you in a lecture, like literally… and turns out you have a lot more in common than you originally had thought.

Freshers week had killed you. You knew uni was going to be night out mad but on mornings like this where you had an early lecture with a new class, you regretted going a little too hard with your flatmates.

“Y/n are you up?” Your flatmate lily called out creaking the door open, her ginger hair frayed, with dark circles making her eyes squint.

“Yep.. yep I’m up… what’s the time?”

“8:35…”

“SHIT!” Your class started in 25 minutes and you had only just woken up.

You managed to get dressed at the speed of light, a cozy cardigan and mom jeans being thrown on as quickly as possible. You fixed your wild hair and messily applied a little makeup to brighten your exhausted complexion.

You left the flat with ten minutes till class waving a quick goodbye to your friends before running to the lecture hall. Just as you got inside, with One minute to spare, a hard body collided with your own. All of your papers and your thermos that you’d been passed by your flatmate before you left, spilled everywhere the hot coffee staining your cream cardigan.

“Oh shit! Shit, I’m so sorry…” a very tall, mousy-haired boy turned around. He dove to the floor and collected your papers, his cheeks red with embarrassment.

“Your cardigan… I’m so sorry… I was heading to my seat and I didn’t see you there because I’m pretty tall you see and..and-”

“Calm down… I’m fine.. really just shhh…”

The mix of your now damp body, your banging headache, and this boy rambling all became a little too much as you rose your finger to his lips to shut him up. He immediately did as he was told and scrambled to give you your papers back.

As the lecturer entered everyone began getting seated, leaving you following after the boy, the only remaining seat being beside him. You could feel his guilty eyes planted on you as the lecture began.

“So you’re interested in literature huh?” His voice whispered.

“Yes, I am… I assume you’re the same?” You replied politely.

“Yes.. look I know you told me to shhh but I feel really bad about me being a clumsy wanker…”

You couldn’t help the small giggle that escaped your lips, another smile falling on his face.

“I’m Remus… Remus lupin…” he offered his hand

“I’m y/n.. y/n l/n…” you shook his hand and then turned away, now paying your full attention to the lecture.

Once the lecture had ended a couple of hours later, you were practically drifting into slumber. The boy beside you had noticed and carefully tapped your arm, resulting in you springing your eyes open.

“Remind me to never go on another night out when I have a lecture the following morning…”

He chuckled deeply and nodded following after as you both exited the lecture hall. His eyes followed your figure as he finally got a chance to take in your beauty. The way your hair, although messy, fell ever so perfectly and framed your face, the way your eyes twinkled at the end of the summer sun, you were mesmerizing, it took everything in him to not throw himself in front of a car over the fact he had greeted you by throwing coffee on you.

“Right better get back to my flat..”

“Same here I’m headed this way…”

Remus pointed in the same direction as your flat and the two of you laughed walking with each other. Truthfully he just wanted an excuse to spend more time with this pretty stranger.

“Freshers is killing you then huh?” Remus attempted to continue the conversation.

“Yes, it is! My friends are insistent on going out every night… and I mean don’t get me wrong I love drinking but every night… I just want to sleep…” you giggled lightly.

“Yeah I can relate to that one… my friends are just as bad… I’m more of a casual pub guy I guess… clubs are just so busy!”

“I completely agree! And it’s always packed and gross and just… oh here’s my flat block…”

Remus’s eyes widened “you’re kidding…”

“Uh no I’m not…” you shook your head confused.

“This is my flat block too!”

Both you and Remus burst into laughter “do you live alone?”

“No I live with three other guys… we all went to school together… what floor are you?” Remus asked as both of you got into the lift.

“Four…”

“We’re on the same floor!? Are you sure we don’t live together…” he joked

“Unless you’re secretly a woman then I’m not too sure…” you teased

Once the lift dinged to your floor both exited and went to walk in opposite directions down the corridor “right well it was nice to meet you, Remus.. apart from the uh.. coffee..”

Remus blushed deeply again “sorry.. again… and yeah it was lovely meeting you… uh if you ever want to go for coffee that does result being thrown all over you then my flat number is 106…”

You couldn’t help but blush yourself and smiled “Mines 112… I’m usually just binge-watching the office and reading so feel free to knock whenever…”

Remus nodded a little too enthusiastically before they both reluctantly departed. Unknown to each other both of them immediately sighed after entering their flats. Both are already growing crushes.

“What’s her name?” Sirius asked as he attempted to throw popcorn into James’s mouth.

“She doesn’t by chance live with a redhead called lily? I met her in my classes and I think I’m in love…” James uttered dramatically.

Remus rolled his eyes and sat with his friends “I’m not sure I haven’t been over there yet… and we haven’t had a class together since… I don’t wanna be some creep who just turns up on her doorstep..”

“Why don’t we all go? We could bring them like a cake or something for housewarming purposes…” James suggested with a mischievous glint in his eye.

“A cake? A fucking cake James? Oh yeah, nothing says raw sex appeal like a cake…” Remus countered sarcastically.

“Ooh, you have sex on your mind Mooney? Bloody hell I wanna see this girl come on…” Sirius announced springing to his feet and running out the door. Remus panicked and ran after him.

A knock on the door made you jump out of your skin. You were just dancing around in your kitchen to some Bowie and the loud bang halted you in your place.

Having just got out of the shower, it shocked you to have someone knock on your door so late in the evening, let alone when both your flatmates were out doing a food shop.

Apprehensively you opened the door and the site before you was pretty confusing. A guy with shoulder-length dark hair was leaning against the door frame with a smirk, while the boy you couldn’t stop thinking about was wide-eyed and panting behind him.

“Uh… hello?” You questioned

“Hello beautiful I’m Sirius… my friend here Remus said some girls lived down the hall and well I thought I’d introduce myself…” Sirius stated with a flirty smirk.

Remus looked completely horrified. The last thing he needed was his friend, who seemed to get any girl he wanted, going after the one girl he had taken a huge liking to.

“Well hello Sirius… my friends are currently food shopping so it’s just me… and hi Remus..” you said making a point of waving at the lanky boy who looked at a loss.

“We were out…” a female voice called out from behind the two boys. Lily and Marlene stood shopping bags in hand as they looked at the two boys judgmentally.

“Marlene.. lily this is Remus and Sirius…” you introduced opening the door wider so your two flatmates could pack away the shopping.

“Pleasure…” Marlene muttered sarcastically as she barged past the boys with lily following after.

“Is there something you wanted?” You asked politely realizing the two boys were still standing there.

“Well sorry y/n we were just… well he was-”

“What my dear pal Remus was trying to say is we’d love to come in.. have a couple of drinks get to know our new neighbours..” Sirius stated confidently.

You chuckled lightly and as your two friends simply murmured in agreement the two boys waltzed in, not before texting their over two friends to come and join in on the phone.

Turns out James and lily had met previously in one of their shared classes, the two of them chatted away happily. Marlene got along well with Sirius and Peter, she and Sirius bonded over their dating tips for men and women. This left you and Remus sitting together, both of you too nervous and awkward to start up a conversation.

“I see you got the stain out…” Remus’s voice called out after a prolonged silence.

You looked down at the cardigan you’d thrown on and smiled softly. It was the same one he’d stained with coffee just a few weeks prior.

“Yes I did.. was hard though I was going to knock on your door for the invoice..” you teased enjoying his gruff laugh.

“I know you hated me apologising but… I got you this as an apology…”

Remus rifled in his pocket for a bar of coffee flavoured chocolate. When he saw it he knew he needed to get it but just wasn’t sure when to give it to you.

Your eyes lit up at the site and you immediately threw your arms around him “This is my favourite chocolate brand!?”

“Me too!!” He said just as enthusiastically which made you chuckle even harder.

*********

The following months flew by with casual encounters and Remus doing everything to accidentally run into you. The annoying part was you were none the wiser, your friends however weren’t as oblivious.

Remus was currently doing his usual walk home, which consisted of walking past your apartment and loitering in the corridor just so he may be able to bump into you. Today however it wasn’t you he bumped into.

“Remus? Not loitering about again are you?” Marlene said rather bluntly as she left the flat.

“Oh no… I was just-”

“Save it… I know you’re mad for her and between me and you the feelings are mutual… so I’m going to help you…”

Remus was in shock but appreciated Marlene’s blunt attitude. He needed to take this into his own hands.

You had just come out of your last lecture for the day. Marlene had mentioned how no one was going to be home which was a little odd. But either way, you made your way home.

By the time you’d come up the stairs and gotten to the corridor where the entrance to your flat sat, it was clear what was going on.

There stood your favorite boy with a bouquet of flowers, a box of your favorite chocolates, and the cutest nervous smile you had ever did see. You were ready to grab him by the shoulders and snog him right then and there.

“Look y/n… I don’t think it’s too shocking by now to realise that I like you a lot… and if we could maybe… go out sometime… on a date, I’d be honoured…” Remus stated proudly. It was clear he’d rehearsed it in his head which to you made it even sweeter.

“Of bloody course…” you answered taking the flowers and chocolates and placing them on the ground. Remus furrowed his eyebrows and panic set in.

“Don’t you like them?”

“I love them… I can’t kiss you if there are flowers in your face though can I?”

“Guess not…”

Both of your cheeks were now hot with anticipation. You bent up and gently let your lips glide across his. You struggled not to smile throughout the kiss, it was so sweet and soft just like the boy before you

“About fucking time…” Marlene’s voice called out from the end of the hall. Unknown to you, all your new and old friends had gathered to watch the interaction. Sirius’s idea of course

[eldritch-spouse]

You know I think Breg would benefit from having friends, one : to give his drunk father figure some rest and two : to have people  stop or encourage him in his bullshit. Obviously having monster friends would be better for him, so I made a list of the people I think he could along with (and the ones he would chomp without regrets)

Friends :

Santi: this one is easy, Santi seems to be an easygoing person and a good friend to have. When he's not drooling over Breg, I think he'd give some really good tips about life and how to deal with his obsession (after begging for a threesome and getting punched in the face), if they got close enough, Santi could even help Breg forget about some of his insecurities in the way that he would put him at ease.

Grimbly : by association, he'd be intrigued by Breg, for the first few times, their first conversations would be "You're so tall !! No you're like huge" , "Well you're small like a...bean", but they get along just fine.

Fank-E : He's friends with everyone and he'll put a bunch of stickers on Breg and he lowkey annoy the shit of him at certain times but it will end up in this semi-consensual kinda forced friendship (who's more insistant him or Breg ? I guess we'll never know)

Gallon : Him and Egghead would have talks that would leave Eggy scratching his head and staring into the void, but they're nice to each other, Gallon might be a bit condescending in reaction to a how simple Breg's mind seems to be.

Middle ground

Patches : I hesitated as putting him as friend but I think his scientific interests would put Breg off

Belo : Belo is too polite and uptight, and his fixated stare can make Breg feel uneasy, they talk just fine

Sybastian : Syb just kind of mind his bussiness and keep it pushing but there's rare times where he growls a "hello" to Breg and keeps walking

Nebul : Nope, this only reason why they're not enemies is because Nebul is civilized, but the potions and his dominating nature would make Bregory avoid him like the plague

No fucking way :

Morrell : Their interest for the same thing (human) is diverging in two different directions, Breg is like "Humans are friends not food ! 😡" and Morrell is like "yUM sTEaK !", it's their relationship on a very surface level and I think Eggy would leave it at that

Hellion : Nah, they would fight and Breg would just bite that head off his neck 

Vinnel : That punk would try to pull a prank on Breg, he would fall for it, get mad and then catch Vinnel and try to squish him like a stress toy, Vinnel would be in pain for a little while and finally leave Breg alone (or plot a terrible revenge)

Did it actually turned into a scale of friends to archnemesis of TCE? Yes. Am I proud ? Yes.

Here's the thing though.

One of the first things said about Breg is that he dislikes monsters. He glorifies humans and has a general aversion to monsters, finding them generally untrustworthy. This isn't to say there can't be exceptions, like Fasma, but Breg would probably have a much bigger drive to acquire human friends.

The problem with human friends is that it wouldn't take too long for him to cross boundaries if Breg is yet to meet his obsession.

With monster friends, you're also forgetting that Breg refuses to set foot in The Clergy in general. He's been there once with Fasma, didn't like it at all, vowed not to enter it again- He'd have to meet staff outside. I sincerely don't think many of these would work out all that well, certainly not Santi. The incubus' insistence on wanting to fuck him would make Breg really aggressive really fast. Grimbly's manipulation and cute talk would fall on deaf ears and unfortunately things with Gallon would be more akin to one-sided mockery. Fank-E would genuinely irritate Breg, but since he's a machine and not a monster, things might work out given he's moderately quiet.

Belo's aura as an angel might make Breg slightly more at ease, yet somehow hyperaware of the power himself, which would probably confuse the breeder a little. Patches would get himself torn in two horizontally if he doesn't contain his scientific interest around Breg, as it could trigger really intense reactions from the ex-captive. Morell and him would just brawl, correct.

Ironically, I see him as possibly getting along with Glauk, even if there's a barrier there in the sense Breg doesn't know how to swim properly yet. Glauk is relatively small and can't say weird things to him plus seems eager to share all kinds of trinkets people dump in the aquarium. This is a bit of an impossible scenario, unless Glauk is being transported outside for some reason or another.

[dootznbootz]

Don't get me wrong, I hate the telegony with every FIBER of my being. HOWEVER!! I feel like there's so much yummy angst potential with Odypen.

Like?? Imagine Penelope holding Odysseus' dead body. And it reminds her so much of when he'd fall asleep in her arms, in their bed holding an infant Telemachus. Because little baby Telemachus wouldn't stop crying so he had to be held in his papa's arms :3

But he's still crying to this day,, crying in the background, sobbing, hugging his mother from behind as she's holding her dead husband. Her husband that she waited 20 YEARS for. Her husband that's literally been threw hell and BACK, yet who never gave up because he wanted to see HER and their SON!!

He could've stayed with Calypso, he could've stayed with Kirke, he could've. But he DIDN'T. And I know damn well the moment he came back, and she saw him, she SAW on his face he's been threw shit. And imagine that, imagine the pain of someone you love more than the Sun experiencing that. Imagine that, and they did all of that, to see you.

People undermine that Penelope loves Odysseus just as much as Odysseus loves Penelope. It's been 20 years. She had every right to assume he's gone or get remarried. But she didn't. She had faith the entire time.

And she waited so long, and he went threw so much, just for him to get killed by some borderline (Not fully) rapeling. That's so heart-wrenching.

And for Telemachus, who never even KNEW his father. To suddenly see him again, to see how happy his mother is, how happy he is. Just for some bastard he has to call his half-brother to kill him. Telemachus knew so little of his father, only the stories Penelope told him. And now, sadly, it'll stay that way.

Telemachus and Penelope would fucking despise Telegonus. They've been waiting so long for this man, and this man has waited and had to go threw so much. All three of them did not go threw all that just for Telegonus to kill him. I don't care if it was an 'accident'. It doesn't matter if the killer didn't want to do it, it matter's that the victim's family lost someone they FUCKING LOVED.

Penelope would NEVER marry Telegonus, and Telemachus would never marry Kirke.

But Odysseus death gives us some JUICY angst. I hate it. But good god it scratches that angst-loving part of my brain SO GOOD. 😼

Feel free not to answer since this is a rather long ask/ramble :'D And ye, take care Mad! <3

Oh, also, just so it's not ALL just angst, a few Penelope and Baby Telemachus headcanons/shenanigans? They mean the world to both Odysseus AND me 🥹

So, this is a really fun ask...But I don't think you're going to get the answer you'd like from me :')

As many folks know, I am a big lover of fluff and very soft stuff. I have angst but even then I would consider it more hurt/comfort in a way as I do plan for the "comfort" to be what's most important :) I also just think of "angst" as just the "something that makes sense storywise".

The Tele-GONE-y to me, is just blatent whump. Not really my cup of tea.

Also the Tele-GONE-y has the whole bullshit about Odysseus doing fuck all in random war, getting married and having children with a random af woman, before coming back to get killed. So that's just...ew. All of it is ew.

And I don't even like the idea of Telegonus existing in any form. At most, Telegonus would only exist in my mind as Polites' son. (not based on Epic at all. This Polites is my own special guy. He's my lil weird goober of my own design reeeeee) My dear friend thehelplessmortals is the only person who I feel explores it in a way that makes sense to me and seems canon.

As you put it into words:

"And she waited so long, and he went through so much, just for him to get killed by some borderline (Not fully) rapeling. That's so heart-wrenching."

And it's just TOO heartwrenching for me :') I can't do it. It's honestly such a horrifying scenario that I got nauseous the first time I heard about it. (that's not even getting into the gross out of character marriage circle and Odysseus fucking around away from his family)

For me, I cannot see Circe (my Circe definitely) as a mother regardless. She wasn't made for motherhood. Also Odysseus and her only have sex once in my writing in exchange for his men to be turned back into humans. (as it's only stated explicitly once in the Odyssey)

The Odyssey also says that Odysseus' line only has one son each. That's Telemachus. (OdyPen can have a daughter though! >:3 Girldad Odysseus is very tasty for me)

If you're just into the angst of Odysseus' death, I got a bit of that though :'D

Penelope being 75% Naiads will live a long life. And Odysseus, being her husband, gets the advantages of having a magic Water wifey and that affects him in how he will live a long life as well (Calypso also gave him ambrosia/nectar to keep him alive. as he was nearly dead when he washed up.)

BUT. He is mostly mortal. He lives way beyond what is normal for Mortals but still.

His hair now fully gray. His breathing raspy and slow. He's slow to move...

Penelope lives a bit afterward. Sleeping and taking comfort in their nest that cradles her as she sleeps. She feels him everywhere. She grieves him endlessly.

Their nest starts to wilt. Only when she goes too does it come alive again.

And for some random Penelope and Telemachus headcanons :P

Nereids have lined bioluminescence, while NAIADS have spots. Like the black spots on the beloved rainbow trout 🥹 (they don't have the black spots. they just have spots that glow in their own control lol)

Telemachus gets "spots" from both his mama (naiad scales/glowbit) and his papa (freckles) 🥹

It's what they use to communicate underwater. And it's nice because even if you're not full naiad and don't have as many scales, you can still communicate as it's about the flickers :3 (Odysseus can understand these to a degree)

Very rarely do they "just randomly glow" as you know, don't wanna give away your thoughts. But it's cute because Odysseus will occasionally have a lightshow when one of them is dreaming.

I know a lot of people have Penelope see Odysseus in Telemachus constantly, and while she does to a degree, she is actually one of the few people who really emphasizes that he's his own person. You don't have to be good at whittling, you make such beautiful pottery. You like green, not orange. You don't have to pick that color when it's not your favorite and because other people simply get excited about you being like your dad sometimes. That type of stuff.

You take care too, Dear Anon! :D

[ninadove]

Nina reads Dracula 🦇

October 1st

Happy spooky season (for real this time)! 🎃

Let’s stab some vampires!

4 a. m.—Just as we were about to leave the house, an urgent message was brought to me from Renfield to know if I would see him at once, as he had something of the utmost importance to say to me.

It’s the Mina Effect. No one can resist her Cool Secretarial Skills and Knowledge of the Train Schedule.

"Take me with you, friend John," said the Professor. "His case in your diary interest me much, and it had bearing, too, now and again on our case. I should much like to see him, and especial when his mind is disturbed."

"May I come also?" asked Lord Godalming.

"Me too?" said Quincey Morris. "May I come?" said Harker. I nodded, and we all went down the passage together.

GUYS this is not a picnic

"I appeal to your friends," he said, "they will, perhaps, not mind sitting in judgment on my case. By the way, you have not introduced me."

Renfield I love you

"Lord Godalming, I had the honour of seconding your father at the Windham; I grieve to know, by your holding the title, that he is no more. He was a man loved and honoured by all who knew him; and in his youth was, I have heard, the inventor of a burnt rum punch, much patronised on Derby night. Mr. Morris, you should be proud of your great state. Its reception into the Union was a precedent which may have far-reaching effects hereafter, when the Pole and the Tropics may hold alliance to the Stars and Stripes. The power of Treaty may yet prove a vast engine of enlargement, when the Monroe doctrine takes its true place as a political fable. What shall any man say of his pleasure at meeting Van Helsing? Sir, I make no apology for dropping all forms of conventional prefix. When an individual has revolutionised therapeutics by his discovery of the continuous evolution of brain-matter, conventional forms are unfitting, since they would seem to limit him to one of a class. You, gentlemen, who by nationality, by heredity, or by the possession of natural gifts, are fitted to hold your respective places in the moving world, I take to witness that I am as sane as at least the majority of men who are in full possession of their liberties. And I am sure that you, Dr. Seward, humanitarian and medico-jurist as well as scientist, will deem it a moral duty to deal with me as one to be considered as under exceptional circumstances." He made this last appeal with a courtly air of conviction which was not without its own charm.

I am, indeed, charmed

Van Helsing was gazing at him with a look of utmost intensity, his bushy eyebrows almost meeting with the fixed concentration of his look. He said to Renfield in a tone which did not surprise me at the time, but only when I thought of it afterwards—for it was as of one addressing an equal:—

YES!!!!! VICTORY!!!!!

"Let me entreat you, Dr. Seward, oh, let me implore you, to let me out of this house at once. Send me away how you will and where you will; send keepers with me with whips and chains; let them take me in a strait-waistcoat, manacled and leg-ironed, even to a gaol; but let me go out of this. You don't know what you do by keeping me here. I am speaking from the depths of my heart—of my very soul. You don't know whom you wrong, or how; and I may not tell. Woe is me! I may not tell. By all you hold sacred—by all you hold dear—by your love that is lost—by your hope that lives—for the sake of the Almighty, take me out of this and save my soul from guilt! Can't you hear me, man? Can't you understand? Will you never learn? Don't you know that I am sane and earnest now; that I am no lunatic in a mad fit, but a sane man fighting for his soul? Oh, hear me! hear me! Let me go! let me go! let me go!"

OH MY GOD YES he truly is Van Helsing’s equal!!! Not only does he suffer from I Cannot Tell You Shit Syndrome, he also uses what I will now officially refer to as the Dracula Loop™ to evoke his own imprisonment!!!

"You will, I trust, Dr. Seward, do me the justice to bear in mind, later on, that I did what I could to convince you to-night."

Well that sounds ominous. Hopefully no one immediately gets mentioned in a way that strongly parallels a character we’ve just lost in atrocious circumstances —

I went with the party to the search with an easy mind, for I think I never saw Mina so absolutely strong and well.

[Demonic screeches]

"You know this place, Jonathan. You have copied maps of it, and you know it at least more than we do. Which is the way to the chapel?" I had an idea of its direction, though on my former visit I had not been able to get admission to it; so I led the way, and after a few wrong turnings found myself opposite a low, arched oaken door, ribbed with iron bands. "This is the spot," said the Professor as he turned his lamp on a small map of the house, copied from the file of my original correspondence regarding the purchase.

Now is not the time to be facetious Abraham

The whole place was becoming alive with rats.

For a moment or two we stood appalled, all save Lord Godalming, who was seemingly prepared for such an emergency. Rushing over to the great iron-bound oaken door, which Dr. Seward had described from the outside, and which I had seen myself, he turned the key in the lock, drew the huge bolts, and swung the door open. Then, taking his little silver whistle from his pocket, he blew a low, shrill call. It was answered from behind Dr. Seward's house by the yelping of dogs, and after about a minute three terriers came dashing round the corner of the house.

As someone who grew up with a Yorkshire Terrier, this makes me indescribably happy. Good boys 🖤🩶🧡💛

The house was silent when we got back, save for some poor creature who was screaming away in one of the distant wards, and a low, moaning sound from Renfield's room. The poor wretch was doubtless torturing himself, after the manner of the insane, with needless thoughts of pain.

I came tiptoe into our own room, and found Mina asleep, breathing so softly that I had to put my ear down to hear it. She looks paler than usual.

I have no words.

"Don't you know me?" I asked. His answer was not reassuring: "I know you well enough; you are the old fool Van Helsing. I wish you would take yourself and your idiotic brain theories somewhere else. Damn all thick-headed Dutchmen!"

Renfield on the other hand has many words.

"Mrs. Harker is better out of it. Things are quite bad enough for us, all men of the world, and who have been in many tight places in our time; but it is no place for a woman, and if she had remained in touch with the affair, it would in time infallibly have wrecked her."

[Slams head on desk]

If then the Count meant to scatter these ghastly refuges of his over London, these places were chosen as the first of delivery, so that later he might distribute more fully. The systematic manner in which this was done made me think that he could not mean to confine himself to two sides of London. He was now fixed on the far east of the northern shore, on the east of the southern shore, and on the south. The north and west were surely never meant to be left out of his diabolical scheme—let alone the City itself and the very heart of fashionable London in the south-west and west.

JONATHAN HOW CAN YOU BE SO SMART YET SO DUMB

"To hell with you and your souls!" he shouted. "Why do you plague me about souls? Haven't I got enough to worry, and pain, and distract me already, without thinking of souls!"

🥺

Will not mention "drinking."

Fears the thought of being burdened with the "soul" of anything.

Has no dread of wanting "life" in the future.

Despises the meaner forms of life altogether, though he dreads being haunted by their souls.

Logically all these things point one way! he has assurance of some kind that he will acquire some higher life. He dreads the consequence—the burden of a soul. Then it is a human life he looks to!

And the assurance—?

Merciful God! the Count has been to him, and there is some new scheme of terror afoot!

AN UNEXPECTED BREAKTHROUGH

[Renfield] had got a scrap of paper and was folding it into a note-book.

Oh gods are we going to hear from Renfield himself??? Please say yes

The purchaser is a foreign nobleman, Count de Ville,

Count de Ville

Outside of the obvious pun I am being French-baited again… This novel truly is a Professor Layton game.

< Prev 🦇 Next >

[sigynpenniman]

The frustrating thing about being a Disney adult is that sometimes Disney will make a decision or an announcement I don’t totally love (tearing out Tom Saywer island and the river to fit in cars and villains) but I remain generally optimistic about the overall thing (I’m very excited for cars and villains) and even though my feelings are sort of complex I basically have to settle into full Disney defense mode and get ready to act like it’s the best idea ever because when you go on Twitter everyone who’s mad about it is straight using fascist dog whistles. I don’t think it’s really a known thing outside of Disney people just HOW MANY staunch Disney people, very specifically Magic Kingdom people, are extremely extremely right wing. The biggest Disney passholder group that has over 300K members is run by a man who wears custom trump shirts and ears to the parks, posts photos of himself wearing them, and then starts going ARE YOU TRIGGERED? IT’S JUST A SHIRT when people point out to him he’s breaking the “no political posts” rules HE SET in his own group. I’m not super jazzed to be losing Tom Sawyer island but any time Disney does something like this if you dig into the pages of almost anyone who’s Extremely Loudly Angry they’re busy CLAIMING it’s because Nostalgia and Sightlines ans Park Design but when you scroll for five minutes it becomes increasingly obvious that they’re actually pissed off because Magic Kingdom is very slowly removing the bits which uncritically play acted some very dark parts of America’s history and while I honestly don’t think Disney actually gives a shit and won’t give them the credit to claim they’re doing it on purpose, the people who are upset about it very much always are even if they don’t quite know it. It’s very very hard to articulate without actually being inside it but there’s this very specific contingent of people who get EXTREMELY UPSET about these sorts of changes and use extremely charged language like “shameful” “disgraceful” “dancing on someone’s grave” “Disney is dying” about a theme park ride that makes it very obvious they are in fact just deifying some fantasy idea of squeaky clean white conservative Americana and they’re very very angry about “tradition” and “legacy” and “removing what matters” but suddenly get realllllly uncomfortable and completely unable to pin down exactly what “legacy” we’re losing. And I know it sounds like it’s not that serious but I ASSURE you it is. If you go scroll almost any Twitter account that’s like, unhealthily angry about the removal of Tom Sawyer and start reading their posts deeper I absolutely promise you they will all be about how we’re “losing American history” and “Disney hates America” and “this is a disgrace to Walt’s vision” and like straight up posting photos of old plaques from Frontierland that talk about the great American colonizing spirit of faith in god and going “I wonder why Disney hates this now 👀👀👀” as some sort of stupid conservative gotcha. Like yes I am quite unhappy they’re taking out Tom Sawyer island because I fucking love those spooky ass caves but I have no intention of saying that out loud because I want absolutely nothing and no association with the spectacularly loud group of people who are using Theme Park Drama to post literal fascist dog whistles and whine about how they’re Erasing Your History. Shut up

[atopvisenyashill]

it fucking sucks that like 50% of fire and blood volume I is weird sex rumors but I just realized that if grrm wanted to be truthful to how historians in the past smeared political figures they hated, there should've been more Gay Sex Rumors. it happened to julius caesar and marie antoinette. now I want f&b volume II to have the pro blackfyres claim that daeron ii's half dornish sons fornicate with each other and grrm will let the audience argue endlessly if this means baelor/maekar is canon.

No literally okay obviously i am more of a History Enjoyer than a History Understander but generally when you’re trying to smear someone you accuse them of a) incest or b) being gay and the targs are RIPE for that shit why WOULDNT their enemies accuse them of being gay incest motherfuckers???? WHY DID NO ONE ACCUSE RHAENA THE LESBIAN OF FUCKING ALYSANNE???? personally i think roose bolton should have been like “and you KNOW alysanne only outlawed prima noctus bc she was flicking her sister and wanted to be left alone to lez in peave by her CUCK brother” like come on. mushroom should have accused aegon and aemond of having a sick nasty affair!! why did people not focus in on rhaenyra and laena fucking more!!!! gyldayn quotes every single man in the realm who ever called rhaenyra a whore just to be like “well they’re probably being dramatic” YOU ARENT SLICK YOU RAGGEDY BITCH WHY DID I NOT GET THE DETAILS.

but anyways i’ve said before that rhaena being a lesbian was george actually realizing that People Are Gay kinda late in his life (i forgive him, he is after all just an old man from jersey named george) and trying to rectify his mistake of making asoiaf so het and i’m so serious about that tbh. george has always prided himself on being historically accurate especially when it comes to the incel crowd (for lack of a better term here) getting mad that Brown People And Women Exist. like, he’s very insistent that female warriors like arya brienne asha are not ahistorical, that women were vicious and politically active just like catelyn and cersei and rhaenyra and alicent etc etc so i do think that as the culture changed and people started more openly speaking of how gay people got along in history, george really started thinking about the way he’s portrayed queerness in his own story. i’m not saying i think we’re gonna get dick sucking on page but i AM saying i think he goes more hardcore about the queer subtext & probably we’re likely to see more queerness in f&b ii: 2 fire 2 blood the way we got all this subtextual stuff and main queer characters in f&b.

so yes. baelor and maekar WILL be fucking thanks!!!!!!

[abeautifulblog]

(Leslie Fish - "Dane-Geld")

ROFL, I love it. 🤣 This is so fuckin catchy, I am beyond delighted that this song exists. Thank you for introducing this to my life, friendo. 🙏

But also: lol Kipling was so full of shit.

And apologies, but you have activated the hyperfixation, soooo...

--

DANEGELDS: WELL, AKSHUALLY---

or

DANEGELDS: I'M SO GLAD YOU ASKED!

--

So, I should have been more clear in my last post: there's nothing inherently ¿🤨? about Burgred bribing vikings to go away, despite what the victorians would have you believe. Paying tribute to placate an aggressive foreign power was standard operating procedure in that era -- just one of the occasional costs of doing international politics.

I mean ffs, lol, THIS was the viking invasion of England:

Vikings land in Kent; Wessex pays them a danegeld to go away. Vikings go to East Anglia; East Anglia pays them a danegeld to go away. Vikings go to York; Northumbria tries to fight them and gets curb-stomped. Vikings go to Nottingham; Mercia pays them a danegeld to go away. Vikings go to Thetford; East Anglia tries to fight them and gets curb-stomped. Vikings go to Reading; Wessex gets curb-stomped for a bit and then pays them a danegeld to go away. Vikings go to London; Mercia pays them a danegeld to go away. Vikings go put down a revolt in Northumbria. Vikings go to Torksey; Mercia pays them a danegeld to go away…………….. but this time the vikings don't leave. (cue my fic)

(Really, Kipling? "We never pay anyone danegeld"?? Said no one ever. The mid ninth century is nothing but the Saxons playing hot potato with the vikings.)

The only ¿🤨? part about Nottingham was why Burgred bothered dragging the West Saxons out of bed to help him besiege the city, if he was just going to pay the vikings off without a single fight. Why assemble such a massive coalition army and then not use it? (That's what modern historians give him shit for, not the danegeld itself -- contrast this with how they tend to characterize Alfred's danegeld, that yeah okay sure, he paid one too, but he made the vikings work for it first.) To me, it suggests that either something about the situation at Nottingham changed, that made fighting untenable, or that having the army was the point -- that it was part of Burgred's leverage for encouraging the Danes to take the payout and go, rather than deciding to keep the city like they'd done with York.

The point is, no one was under any illusions that danegelds would buy a permanent peace -- what they bought you was time. If you were genuinely unprepared to fight off a viking invasion, then paying the danegeld was your best option. (Even if it makes later historians big mad that you didn't go heroically stiff-upper-lip yourself into an early grave.) Yes, your economy will take a hit -- danegelds were not ""trifling"" -- but it'll recover faster from a danegeld than it will from having your armies decimated/crops burned/towns looted/peasants carted off into slavery.

Bribing vikings was a reliable way to make them go bother someone else for a few years, while you (theoretically) got your shit together so you'd be better prepared for the next time they circled back round. Paying a danegeld, in and of itself, was not a dumb or lazy or shameful move -- so long as you treated it like the temporary measure that it was, and followed up with stronger steps. Wessex did; they made good use of the time they bought, and consequently they withstood the next round of invasions. Mercia did not, or not good enough anyway, and that's a different story.

But that's not how Kipling and the victorians felt about it -- they fuckin H A A A A A T E D danegelds. 😂 It didn't vibe with the English Exceptionalism that they were attempting to manufacture, a version of history in which the English were a godly-heroic race of brave and brilliant white people who righteously deserved to take over the whole world. Danegelds were a very embarrassing thing to have to explain -- how could their illustrious ancestors have been so spineless that they'd let themselves get shaken down rather than fight? Or so STOOOOPID, because don't they know that "once you have paid him the Danegeld / You never get rid of the Dane"???? (And with the benefit of 20/20 hindsight, they could confidently say that paying danegelds had done Mercia and East Anglia no good.) It would have been far more palatable to their sensibilities if the Saxons had believed in death before danegeld.

But that's imposing an ahistorical set of values on the situation. There's nothing in the contemporary sources to indicate that the Saxons attached any particular shame or stigma to paying a tribute -- to the military defeats that had made it necessary, yeah absolutely, but not the payment itself.

In my opinion, what the Saxon kingdoms should be embarrassed about is not the danegelds, but how long it took them to get their shit together and recognize the vikings as a real threat, and then put aside their petty internecine squabbling to deal with it -- too long, for most of them, and too late by the time they did. It's depressingly familiar, to have one's society faced with an existential threat, while the people in power would rather use the opportunity to dunk on their political rivals than do anything about it. 😐

[coltrainbat]

No One Disrespects Chris’s Girl

Summary: Your Chris’s girlfriend and an interviewer talks smack about you.

WARNINGS: Swearing, big mad Chrissy, little angst, protective Chris

A/N: Something about Chris in protective mode makes me... hmmm... you’ll see. 

DISCLAIMER: All characters and events written, even those based on real people are entirely fictional and are no representation or comment of said characters in real life. 

Chris settled himself into the director’s chair as an assistant came over to adjust his mic. 

He was doing press rounds his new movie, and it was his last interview for the day. So far, he had really appreciated some of the questions asked about the movie and his future projects and enjoyed catching up with journalists he had worked with before. But he was eager to get home into bed with you. 

 You preferred your privacy so besides the casual question as to how you were doing, journalists were warned to not venture into asking about your life or your relationship with Chris well before the interview began.

 Chris was getting the run down from Meg, this was a new journalist who Chris hadn’t worked with previously, an online gossip blog called GoFlow, that presented their interviews in video form via YouTube....  blah… blah... Seemed sound enough, nothing Chris hadn’t done before. He was expecting the 20 minutes interview block to go by smoothly, answer some of the questions he had already received with a slight variation, get a photo for their blog, maybe even sign a t-shirt for someone’s nephew and what not. These things were usually very straight forward. 

 It was 10 minutes after 4 and the new guy was already late. It isn’t a great look, but Chris was patient and was happy to go overschedule to get the blog what they needed. 

 In came, came the journalist, talking obnoxiously on the phone in the corner of the room.

 “Yeah bro, I’m interviewing Captain America… its sick! I bet I could get him to come to boys’ night. Holy shit imagines the chicks we’d pull... alright yeah bro I gotta go do this interview I’ll call you back.” 

 Chris looked over to Megan, mouthing ‘what the fuck’ she just shook her head in disappointment making a mental note to blacklist them if this gets any worse. 

 Chris was a little taken back by the brashness of not only taking a phone call from your buddy when you’re 10 minutes late to your job but also to talk so loudly about going for drinks with a guy you haven’t met and using him to pick up chicks? 

 Fuck me. 

 He realised then and there that this guy was not gonna be easy to work with even if it was just for the next 20 minutes. 

 “Hey Chris! Buddy, big fan of your work, I’m Miles, let’s get this started shall we.” 

 Chris offered him a polite handshake “Nice to meet you, Miles.” Not. 

 The red dot on the camera facing the two across from each other, started blinking, signaling it was rolling.

 It started off ok, yeah, he asked the basic questions about filming with said co-star and what training Chris had to go for to pull of stunts etc. But Chris, being the professional he is, hid his tiredness, putting on a smile for the camera, and answered the questions charmingly and honestly. 

 “So, Chris, you’ve been with your girlfriend y/n for 2 years now, correct?”

 “Yeah, I have she’s amazing, couldn’t ask for anyone better to have by my side.”

 Hoping that was the end of it. 

 “From the little info you two have shared with the public it seems she has a regular job that’s got to be kind of different from yours huh?”

 Chris was getting a little agitated about the questions regarding you. Not because he didn’t like talking about you just the fact, he referred to your job as “regular”. Sure, you worked a 9-5 but the work you did for the community was far from ordinary and inspired him daily. 

 “I wouldn’t say she has a regular job per say, yes our jobs are different but she’s just as a passionate and hardworking in her incredible role at (insert organisation) as I am about acting, she does amazing work and I’m incredibly proud of her.”

 “Do you ever question her intentions? I mean it seems like she doesn’t earn a lot of money and it’s probably very convenient for someone like her to shack up with a moneybag like yourself? It’s also interesting you chose her compared to some of the models you have dated in the past. I don’t know about you, but I’d take the model over the chubby normie any day ya know? ha ha.”

 Chris saw red. 

 How dare this guy shows up late and then insult the women he loves to not only suggest she’s using him for money but to call his beautiful partner, “chubby”? How you looked was none of this guy’s fucking business, to compare you to his exes who were exes for a reason was unreasonable. Any suggestion you were a gold-digger was also absolutely ridiculous since you hated Chris spending money on you without reason. You worked hard day in, day out for the things you have and never asked Chris for a dime. 

 “Go fuck yourself.”

 “Ummm excuse me?”

 “You heard me, go fuck yourself. How fucking dare, you show up late, regurgitate basic ass questions and then go onto insult the woman I love.” 

 Chris got up from his seat, ripping off the mic and looming over Miles, a member of his team came forwards lousily placing an arm in between Chris and the douchebag journalist.

 “Ya know its assholes like you I’d take a lot of pleasure in beating the fuck up.” His thick Boston accent prominent in every word he spat. His finger firmly pointed towards the journalist’s throat. 

 The journalist went mute in his seat holding his hands up in defence, practically shivering with fear as to what the 6ft jacked actor was going to do to him. 

 Chris quickly exited the room before he caught a felony for laying his hands on the guy.  

 Chris didn’t tell you what happened in the interview. But he didn’t need to because shortly after someone leaked the clip. 

 The internet went nuts in Chris’s favour. 

 “Chris Evans defends partner against arrogant journalist”   “SWOON ALERT: Chris Evans gets BIG MAD”   “Miles Darcy FIRED after Chris Evans interview stunt”   “101 Reasons Chris Evans is every woman’s dream man staring with his infamous interview in which he defends his girlfriend”   “Don’t F*ck with Chris Evans”   “Chris Evans calls out sexist remarks made against girlfriend”

 While press was good, your main concern was how this reflected on Chris’s image.

 Sat in your shared living room, looking up from your phone as you scrolled through the endless articles on the interview. You looked up at your boyfriend who was pacing the room. Still furious at the comments. 

 “You didn’t have to defend me you know.”

 “I didn’t have to DEFEND you!? Y/N when an asshole says shit about you TO MY FACE, there’s no way in fucking hell, I’m going to sit there and treat em with kindness.”

 “Yeah, I know baby, but you threatened him… on camera!”

 “And you know what? I’d do it again. Nothing and I mean nothing is more important to me then you and my family. You are my family. And no one, especially not some scummy asshole journalist is going to get away with saying that shit about you. It is my job… you get me? MY JOB to protect you.”

 You sighed. He was right. Maybe his approach was extreme, but Chris was stubborn and this time he was stubborn for good reason. The guy was a fucking asshole. 

 You walked towards him, closing the space between you both. Wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him down towards your chest. He instantly tightened his grip around you and you could feel him ease into your hug with a heavy sigh.

 “Thank you for defending me.” You whispered into his head. 

 “I’m sorry for yelling but yeah, I don’t regret doing it. And if I ever saw that asshole again, I swear to-”

 “I know.” Pressing your finger to his lips to silence him. You moved him to look at you.  “I know.” Nodding your head for emphasis.

 “I love that about you… the way you’d drop anything to save me, or in this case go absolutely ape shit to defend my honour. And that’s why you’re my real-life superhero, baby.” Your fingers now cupping his jaw.

  And… it was pretty hot watching you get mad at him with your ole boston accent.” You smiled at your protector.

 “God, I love you.” He shook his head leaning down to kiss you. 

[thattransboyaled]

reasons why i think havers was in love with the captain (but also me rambling really. bare with me, this was written at 1am)

1. the way he looks at him

honestly one of the main reasons i believe he loved him, because you do not simply just look at people like this. this man is in love (i think the last picture shows this best). in the first picture, the pain in his eyes, i think he’s regretting his decision here, looking at how upset captain is.

2. he is close to the captain

as we know, cap does not laugh/make jokes very often (as seen in 03x01). in the office scene, he mimes punching havers after the line ‘you make sure you give them a bloody nose!’ (and havers goes along with this).

cap also trusts havers. he takes havers suggestion of initiating the emergency lockdown protocol (which i think he would be too proud to do if it was someone else).

so for me, this shows that they are close and that cap is comfortable around havers.

3. just the entire transfer conversation

just before he tells him he has put in for a transfer - on the ‘i want to get involved in the fighting’- you can hear his voice wobble a bit, almost like he is holding back tears. (this might just be peter sandys-clarke’s voice breaking or something, but knowing he does stage acting which requires a lot of control over your voice i think this is probably an intentional decision)

(a video for reference)

he also cannot look cap in the eyes when he says that he has put in for a transfer. when he looks at him afterward and sees how upset cap is and, as i mentioned earlier, i think this is when havers starts to regret his decision a bit. he sees his reaction and is almost like “oh shit. maybe he does care about me.”

(an extra point - i think he also has moments of regret/realisation like this after cap says ‘i shall miss you havers’ + ‘so soon?’ in the office scene)

4. he seems disappointed when cap takes back what he said about missing him

this might be a bit of a stretch, but he doesn't smile straight away and seems upset for a second, but then i think he realises himself and politely smiles to hide his disappointment.

5. the line ‘well. if that’s all?’

the way this line is delivered, he sounds almost hopeful, and again he seems hesitant to leave and disappointed when cap says yes. i think here, for a split second, he himself considers confessing. but it is far too dangerous, and i think he believes (since cap is such a stickler for rules) he would get reported if he had read things wrong. so he is giving cap the chance to confess, to save him from any repercussions.

6. how he reacts to caps ‘i say, havers?’ 

he turns around immediately and leans back into the room a bit, like he’s ready to shut the door and come back in if he needs to. i am so mad we do not get to see his immediate reaction after cap says ‘it’s a bally shame we won’t get to finish the operation together’ but i also think it’s completely intentional. because i think he’d have another moment like in point 4, where he’s disappointed but catches himself. but i think it’s slightly different here. i think he realises that this is caps own little way of truly saying he will miss him. because working on operation william would surely include a lot of time just them, working on paperwork and stuff. so, by cap saying it’s a shame they won’t finish the operation he’s saying it’s a shame they won’t have any time alone together anymore, basically meaning he will miss him. (also i fully believe he walks out so quickly because he is upset here and he doesn’t want cap to see.) 

7. when he leaves 

he looks up and searches for cap in a window, probably because he wants to say one final goodbye, when he sees him there he smiles. then how he stands there for a few seconds, again hesitant to leave and i think regretting his decision again. realising that this is it - he is actually leaving. he probably won’t see cap again. 

anyway i am 100% convinced havers was in love with cap and here are my reasons. i know a lot of it is opinion based and not 100% based on canon, but as i often say, canon is just a suggestion. i would love to hear your thoughts on this!