#YOURE FUCKING STUPID!!! PEOPLE LITERALLY DO LIKE YOU (banging on my head with a hammer)

[windupaidoneus]

no you know what the BULLSHIT thing is about late november always making me a problem person to be around. it's literally right before my birthday. why is my brain so intent on making my circumstances as miserable as possible for my birthday. in like 2020 i spent my birthday thinking abt the friends i'd just lost by having a #bpdmoment & not saying anything about it to our common friends while they were openly trashtalking me to anyone who'd listen

[cursivebloodlines]

Oh, there were many, many things Lydia wanted to do at that moment. One of them was to wipe that stupid fucking smarmy smile off of that man's face. A wave of satisfaction touched her though, just barely, feather-light even - she made him smile. Then she came to her senses: no. It was only to deliberately taunt her. Had to be. She was sure. Literally, everything he did was to torment her, or so she assumed. It frustrated her and made her want to bang her head against a brick wall. Or more specifically, to bang him, though that was still debatable and up in the air. Having thoughts about screwing your spouse shouldn't be all that complicated if you were a normal couple. But nothing about Lydia and Ivan's marriage was remotely normal in the slightest; hence why it was so confusing.

Going back to those thoughts - it helped her get through this whole ordeal - what was it to be? Many options sprang to mind. She could continue on with her not-so-subtle threat to dig her heels into those shoes of his. Or, she could purposely trip herself up, and drag him down with her. Or, if she happened to gently, accidentally went to sweep the leg, that could work too. Even better if she took Ivan down by kicking him in the balls - now that would be satisfying. But given the situation, and the fact she imagined he probably had much faster reflexes or could probably tell she was up to no good, he'd probably stop her. Maybe. It was still tempting, though. Even brought a half-satisfied smirk to her lips. Amazing how a simple thought could be enough.

Until, as usual, Ivan spoke. Something about the way he called her beautiful had her stomach doing somersaults which only infuriated her even more. She chose to ignore that part, having concluded it was all part of demonstrating affection to his wife, as 'normal' as normal should be. Seething. Lydia was seething. Her nostrils flared, and jaw clenched, but she couldn't escape the electric pulse that coursed through her when his breath, warm and infuriatingly enticing, grazed the shell of her ear. "Go fuck yourself," she murmured back in response, yet another one of her false smiles etched on her face so as not to give the wrong impression to the onlookers. "You can shove those dance lessons up your ass. What makes you think I'm going to need them, anyway? This is the first and only time I will ever need to be dancing with you." Lydia rolled her eyes, resenting how easy it was for Ivan to get under her skin and piss her off. It was then, she realised, he probably had only said that to get a rise out of her. It was working. Damn it. "But I suppose I can return the favour: for you, my darling husband, my wedding gift to you and my first act of love as your wife will be the self-sacrificial act of not trying to strangle you today."

It wasn't even a surprise that he could grind her gears so easily. At the best of times, Lydia had a short fuse and an intolerance for other people's bullshit. It was other's people's bullshit that landed her there in the first place. Yet... there was a part of her that just wanted to let herself go, enjoy the moment. It was her wedding, after all, she may as well attempt to make the most of it. She even let out a quiet laugh as she twirled around, letting herself be. Just for a while. Just for now. It was easier when neither of them spoke, her heart hammering as she maintained eye contact with him. Part of her, as much as she tried to deny it to herself, was curious about him. Wanted to know how he ended up this way, like he was a puzzle to figure out. Something about him intrigued her, and she didn't want to know why. Lydia leaned into him, strangely liking the feeling of having him so close to her. Not close enou--nope. Scrap that. She wasn't heading down that road again. "So, when do you suppose we can get out of here?" she asked quietly, half joking when she said it. Surely there wasn't much more of this to go, right? Lydia knew the connotations her question could have implied, and honestly? She was unbothered, left that thought hanging in the air, more interested to see Ivan's reaction.

The brush of her fingers against his lips sent a chill down his spine. Something tickled inside him, more specifically, something tickled on his cock. Damn. How long could it take to drain all those people so that he could have a moment alone with Lydia to fuck her brain out against the wall? He was going to have to suck it up before he could even think about having a second alone with his wife. Especially since people seemed particularly excited to greet and congratulate them for their marriage.

His hand did not move from her lower back. It froze there with an iron grip. When it came the time to have their first dance as husband and wife, he was internally debating whether he shouldn't create a distraction so they could get away from there. However, he couldn't prevent a mischievous smile from forming on his lips when he heard her. Ivan found her threat hilarious. It was the funniest thing he'd heard all day, for sure. Although it could be painful if she step on him in those shoes. Ivan didn't think either of them was on the floor more than necessary and they could always just sway slowly.

"Don't worry, my beautiful wife, I won't let you make a fool of yourself" He murmured with a mischievous smile, leaning in to speak in her ear. Although it wasn't necessary, Ivan brushed his lips against her ear just for the pleasure of being able to touch her in a more intimate way "And my first act of love as a husband and wedding gift will be to gift you some dance classes" He didn't care that she knew dance or not but he would do it if that made Lydia explode with rage just for the fun of being able to fight her "Just tell me later if you prefer waltz or salsa" Ivan gave her a wink. Suddenly, his mind drifted to the idea of another man laying hands on her. His wife. His mother would kill him if she found out he was treating a woman like an object—she'd say she raised him better than that—but the mere thought of another guy laying his hands on Lydia made Ivan want to play target shooting. The very idea of other men touching her so intimately displeased him exceedingly. None of it made sense though. Until less than two hours ago, Ivan's idea was to lock her up in some property where he could guarantee a minimum of security for her and throw the key into the sea so he didn't have to deal with her at all. Now he actually wanted to deal with Lydia.

He gave her a little spin before pulling her back to him. For as long as he could, Ivan held eye contact with her. Lydia was going to be a fun thing to figure out and for the first time, Ivan allowed himself to have expectations about this marriage. He hoped it would not only be fun but mentally stimulating and Lydia? Lydia seemed like a challenge and there was nothing he liked more than a good challenge. His hand remained on her lower back not wanting to move from there and his other hand intertwined with hers, allowing his fingertips to brush against her skin. He allowed himself to rest his chin on the top of her head as they continued to sway to the music. Her hair smelled good, so good, like green apples, smelled almost as good as her lips tasted, though Ivan didn't think anything could top the taste of her lips against his.

[tooruluv]

Kei Tsukishima x F!Reader ( part 4 )

❝ they were the sun and moon, destined to be together but only ever totally meeting once every hundred years or so. ❞

description: in a world where you only see color when you're in love, you've grown frustrated of the greyscale. but falling in love with someone you barely know was never something you planned. and, him not returning the feelings definitely wasn’t planned.

genre: soulmate au... except not quite. everyone is born colorblind. you can only see color once you fall in love (and it grows brighter until you see full color as the love grows). however, that doesn't ensure a lasting connection. it simply means that love exists in that moment, until it doesn't.

word count: 1,680

warnings/notes: nothin’ crazy!! cursing, of course. this one was fun to write!! next part will be longer, promise <3

prev | next

“ ‘cause i can’t make you love me if you don’t, you can’t make your heart feel something it won’t ” - i can’t make you love me, dave thomas junior

┏━━━━━⋇⋆⋆⋇❦⋇⋆⋆⋇━━━━━┓

For your entire life, you had always wondered what your favorite color would be. You would hear your parents talk about it with their friends, you would hear it between the lucky few who had met their lovers early. But you never had one.

It should be such an easy question to ask someone when you first meet them. It should be the most basic human answer, a description of who they are as a person. You’ve done research, scanned websites and took fake online “what color is your aura?” quizzes, only to become frustrated by the black and white.

You even tried to compare the shades of grey to colors. Your mother would tell you what color something is, and you would try to remember. It never worked.

But now, if someone were to ask “what’s your favorite color?”, you would simply tell them, “yellow.”

“I’ll wait for you after practice.” Tsukki told you the next morning.

He stood directly beside your locker, tall and still as if he never hunched over in his life. He pushed up his glasses and walked away as a way to conclude his statement.

You rolled your eyes. Of all the people on this planet, you’ve fallen in love with him. You looked up as if to ask God, or whoever’s up there, “why?”

Working at Blu for the summer was an easy job. When you weren’t glancing at Tsukishima, you poured coffee and lemonades and sold baked goods. It was good for extra money, and everyone that you worked with was kind and welcomed you with smiles. 

Tsukki was sitting at his table, drinking his daily plain black coffee, when your coworker caught you staring. She was a third-year and had been working there since she was your age, so it wasn’t like she hadn’t noticed his attendance. 

Wiping her hands on her apron (which are blue, now that you know), she said, “He’s cute. You should ask him for his number.”

You immediately jumped back, pretending to wipe the counter down. “Absolutely not.”

“He comes in here every day.” She said, as if you didn’t already know. “No normal guy comes in to a coffee place in the middle of summer everyday without reason.”

“We have good coffee.”

“Sure. That’s why.”

For the rest of the summer, she made sure to schedule you for the morning shifts and hang back when she sees him come in. 

At practice, the girls were all discussing what they were making for the bake sale. It was a fun practice, full of team building exercises and barely any running. 

Mai looped her arm through yours as practice ended. She gave you one of her award winning smiles, bouncing on her feet. 

“What?”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“You’re thinking something.” You said, pushing into her side. 

“You’re baking with Kei Tsukishima tonight.” Mai stopped when you almost reached the volleyball practice gym. “Are you excited? Nervous? Do you have everything you need? Chapstick?”

“Fuck you.” 

You pushed her away as you headed to the gym to help with the boys practice. She kept making kissy faces towards you. You flipped her off.

Kei Tsukishima was not one to pay attention to little things. He was a big picture man. He focused on how things affected his future, about college applications, about how plays can be executed by the entire team. 

Yet, when you walked into the gym, he couldn’t help but focus on a strand of your hair that kept sticking to your mouth.

“Are you coming or what?” Tsukki adjusted the bag on his back. He stood at the doors, leaning on one. You were picking up some extra balls for Kageyama and Hinata.

“Coming, coming.” You waved goodbye to the dynamic duo. 

The walk was mainly quiet. Yamaguchi left before you two, claiming that he had a lot of homework to do. You didn’t know about that.

“You don’t have to stay after, you know.” Tsukki said. You looked up. “You don’t have to stay after practice to help those two. You already are helping us enough.”

“I don’t mind.”

“Why do you do it?”

“Hm?”

“Why do you come to our volleyball practices?” He kept his eyes straight. “You come from your practice to help us with ours, and that just sounds ridiculous to me.”

“It looks good on my college app.” You told him. It was his turn to look at you. “And Ukai has been close to my family for a long time, so it’s hard to say no to him when he asks for a volunteer.”

“That makes sense.” He said. “I couldn’t do it.”

“What? Have two practices, or volunteer for Ukai?”

“Both.”

You chuckled, nudging him with your side. He kept walking, but he had a smile too. He wasn’t so dark and gloomy as people thought. 

He had a gorgeous smile.

The rest of the walk was in silence again. It was already dark, and the moonlight made him look ethereal. Tsukki really could be compared with the moon, you decided.

Every once in a while, you two walked too close and accidentally bumped into each other. Or your back of your hand brushed his. It just ended up in little laughs between you both.

And, before you knew it, you were standing in front of your house.

“This is me.”

“I am not wearing this shit.”

“Yes, you are.”

You were trying so hard not to cry laughing, holding up a pink apron that your mom used. You already had a matching one on. He looked at it as if you just offered him a can of dog shit for breakfast.

“You could not pay me to wear that.”

“It’s this or get shit all over you.”

“I’ll take the shit.”

Sighing, you reached to force it on him. He moved back, narrowly avoiding your attack. One more try ended in the same result. You were giggling now, and he was smiling.

“Just…” A struggling pull over his head. “Put…” A push. “It on!” And your arms were around his back.

The position was awkward, but both of you were laughing too much to notice. You had your arms wrapped around his waist, chest to chest as you tied his apron around him. He stood with his arms crossed as he let you put the fucking apron on.

“There. Look at you. So pretty.”

He pushed up his glasses and looked down. “Must be why you’re in love with me.”

“If you keep pulling that card, I’ll be sure you don’t get credit for any of these.”

“Now you’re just being cruel.”

“I don’t get it.”

“Tsukki, there are literal instructions. You follow them.”

“No shit. My question is, what the hell is softened butter?”

“Oh my god.”

Soon enough, the two of you were into a rhythm. You were baking brownies and cupcakes as if you did it together every day. Conversations came natural. 

It was nice.

It wasn’t until you noticed the brown specs of cocoa powder on his nose did you realize how close you were standing. You were to his right, mixing whatever was in your bowl at the time, But you could feel his warmth from beside you.

He could feel you, too. 

“The brownies are brown, obviously.” You said in the middle of the silence. “The cupcakes are brown with black and orange sprinkles, and white frosting. I thought I should tell you.”

He was silent for a minute. You thought that maybe you were annoying him with reminders that you were in love with him, or maybe you should’ve kept it to yourself. But then, he turned to you.

“You said that my eyes were golden brown.”

“I did.”

He was standing far too close. He was standing incredibly too close. And he was staring into your eyes for far too long. You couldn’t conjure up any reasons to hate him, or get rid of your feelings. Why would you want to do that when he is standing beside you, warm and brilliant and glowing.

Fuck.

“What color are my glasses?”

“Black.”

“And my jacket?”

“Black.”

Now he was standing directly in front of you. You didn’t know exactly when you turned, but you had. He was inches from you. His lips were inches from yours.

“And the apron?”

“Pink.”

He was leaning in. There is absolutely no way that this is happening.

All you had to do was lean in, and you could get it over with. Get it out of your mind and gone forever, along with the stupid colors that remind you with every second that he can’t see them back. All you had to do was press your lips to his…

You could feel his breath on your face. Your heart hammered your chest and everything froze at once.

“You must be Kei Tsukishima!”

You jumped back, bringing your body back to your mixing bowl. Your mom entered the kitchen, pajamas on and a smile plastered on her face. You pretended nothing was happening.

“Yes, ma’am.” He greeted. As if nothing was happening.

As if nothing was happening. Because nothing had happened.

“Mom, I know that it’s late.” You started to explain, but she quickly stopped you. 

“Hush now. You spend as much time as you need. Nice to meet you, Tsukishima.” She sent you a wink, heading up the stairs. 

You closed your eyes, trying to forget what just happened. But, when you opened them, you were faced with the worst thing that could possibly happen in that moment.

The colors gained a little bit of hue. His pink apron contrasted brighter against his black jacket. The orange sprinkles gained a little bit of tint. The greyscale filter lifted a bit more.

You wanted to bang your head against the wall. Fuck.

tag list: @vhskenma​​​​​ @elianetsantana​​​​​ @mini-eggs-reads​​​​​ @ysasian​​​ @hhwanggu​​​ @i-stole-your-juice-box​​​ @definitelynotbianca​​​ @denkithunder​​ @smuttyanimeslut​ @yourlocalbabybird​ @theydy-madamonsieur 

[fatesdeepdive]

Entry 9: NO

Before doing anything else, I built a lottery house in the castle. The logistics of there being stores and gambling houses within my personal castle, that my soldiers work at, that don’t just give me whatever I want is kinda weird. The lottery gave me a radish I fed to Lilith.

Support: Hana/Subaki

C: Hana confronts Subaki about his tendency to refer to himself as perfect. He brushes it off, because he thinks that he genuinely is completely without fault. This angers Hana, who brings up a time Subaki fell off his horse and challenges him to a duel.

B: The duo begin their competition. Subaki, despite not actually having any sword skills, manages to defeat Hana by studying her fighting style over several months and messing with her head.

A: Hana takes the second round, beating Subaki in a horse race. Hana reveals that she doesn’t actually care about beating Subaki, just about serving Sakura, and the two decide to suspend their competition.

S: Subaki states that he hates when Hana brings up the time he fell off his horse because he embarrassed himself in front of Hana. Also the duo apparently love each other now.

Review: Decent set up, lackluster execution. I do like Hana’s feelings of inferiority in comparison to Subaki, and Subaki is wonderfully arrogant during this line, but the resolution comes from a revelation Hana had off screen and feels anti-climactic. I felt nothing during the marriage conversation.

Support: Hana/Sakura

C: Hana and Sakura discuss their childhood friendship and the fact that Hana has been protecting Sakura since even before she was a retainer. Sakura states that Hana’s stubbornness pairs nicely with her own introversion.

B: Hana reveals that Sakura’s kindness gave her a reason to dedicate herself to becoming a master samurai. Sakura reveals that she chose Hana as her retainer, in spite of her age and objections from others, because of...a reason explained in the next conversation. Gotta love cliffhangers.

A: Sakura chose Hana as her retainer because of all the times she protected her as a kid, so many times that Hana is covered in scars. Sakura feels guilty over Hana’s scars, but Hana brushes it off, stating that her scars are a badge of honor because they were earned protecting Sakura. Small character design note: Hana does not have any visible scars in this game. She does consistently have a scar in her arm in Heroes, and inconsistently has a scar on her left thigh, but neither of those scars are visible in game. Maybe the scars are hidden below her headband?

Review: First off, these two deserve an S-Rank conversation. They have more chemistry than most of the couples in this game. Setting that aside, I enjoy Hana and Sakura inspiring each other to be better. I love the idea of Hana protecting Sakura from feral dogs and Sakura repaying her by making her a retainer, going against royal officials to do so.

Support: Sakura/Subaki

C: Subaki yawns in front of Sakura then pretends it didn’t happen, because he is too perfect to get fatigued.

B: Subaki makes a tiny slip-up when filling out a form and has a complete meltdown, launching into a self-depreciating rant. Hana brings up that she’s seen him make mistakes before, which only makes things worse.

A: Sakura comforts Subaki and he reveals that his obsession with perfection stems from his childhood; his parents hammered in the idea that he must be perfect at all times as to not embarrass himself in front of royalty. He brings up the time he fell off his horse in front of Sakura right before she chose him as a retainer and reveals that he’s thought for years she chose him out of pity. Sakura comforts him, saying that he’s amazing and his slip-ups only make him more charming.

S: Subaki renews his vows as a retainer, promising to always fight for Sakura even if he cannot achieve total perfection. Sakura accepts, on the condition that Subaki marries her.

Review: I actually really enjoyed this one. The main gag with Subaki is that he’s arrogant and thinks of himself as perfect. This line deconstructs that, showing him fall apart at the idea that he isn’t good enough. It didn’t go fully into it, but this line suggests that Subaki may have some real mental health issues, possibly stemming from an abusive childhood. The romance isn’t perfect, but I do like the idea of Subaki ending up with Sakura because she helps him learn to accept himself. Also for all of Sakura’s supports I’m going to pretend that she isn’t like fourteen, because otherwise they’re all super creepy.

Support: Corrin/Sakura

C: Corrin asks if Sakura dislikes her and Sakura, who has never once visited any Fire Emblem or Smash Brothers forum, states that no one could ever dislike Corrin. Apparently, Sakura is awkward and shy around Corrin because she sucks at talking to people. Corrin offers to help her practice talking.

B: Corrin asks Sakura some basic questions and Sakura freezes up from anxiety and can’t answer anyone. Corrin theorizes that Sakura is easily intimidated by other people.

A: Sakura reveals that she’s always so anxious because she heard a rumor that Nohr actually wanted to kidnap her, not Nohr. This rumor was evidently false, because it makes absolutely no sense from a lore perspective. Also, I question the idea that this is the source of all of Sakura’s anxiety. Her anxiety around Corrin, maybe, but it’s odd that guilt over her sister’s kidnapping that she’s known for years wasn’t her fault would make her anxious around other people. I mean, it’s more pronounced around Corrin, but only in this support line. Whatever. Corrin swears to protect Sakura and I guess that means her anxiety is cured.

Review: This conversation is mediocre. Sakura getting anxiety because of something a maid said once is stupid, but Corrin trying to help her get over it is okay.

You’ll notice that I stopped this at the A rank. Well, you see, Corrin and Sakura only have three, conversations instead of four because, despite Corrin having a variable gender, Corrin and Sakura are siblings and Intelligent Systems would never include incest in a Fire Emblem game. They’d never do that because that would be terrible.

Wait. What’s that? Why does it say on the wiki that they have an S-Conversation? Surely this isn’t real.

Oh god it’s real.

No.

No no no.

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO.

What the fuck, Intelligent Systems? Why did you include incestuous pedophilic marriage in your role-playing game? Seriously, what the actual fuck?

And, looking at Corrin’s support list, it’s not just Sakura. Every single Nohr and Hoshidan royal can date Corrin. I don’t know what’s worse, Corrin having sex with her stranger blood siblings or having sex with the people she thought were her blood siblings for years. Fine. Let’s just do the stupid conversation.

S: Sakura reveals that she’s been dreaming about the sibling she never knew for years, imagining what Corrin would grow up to be like. It’s actually a decent idea, albeit one hidden in the evil cursed S-Support that I hate. Corrin asks if they live up to expectations and Sakura states that they exceed them. Then Sakura says that she loves Corrin. Romantically. Corrin, being the sane person, objects, pointing out that they’re half-siblings. I don’t know where this half-sibling thing came from, as far as Corrin knows both of them are the children of Mikoto and Sumeragi. I mean, it is stated in Revelations that Mikoto isn’t actually the mother of anyone but Corrin, but Corrin doesn’t know that yet. Whatever. Sakura pulls out a letter from Mikoto that she only read a few minutes ago that says, psych! Corrin and Sakura aren’t actually related. At all. So it’s cool to bang. Corrin instantly gets over the whole “Don’t fuck your little sister” thing immediately and proposes to Sakura. What the actual fuck.

Review Continued: If ninety percent of the S-Rank conversation is convincing the audience that, no, this isn’t incest, you know it’s bad. And sure, it isn’t technically incest anymore, but who cares? Corrin and Sakura didn’t know that until ten seconds before they screwed each other. This is an incestuous marriage and it’s fucking gross. The writers clearly know it was gross, but they included it anyway.

And here’s the big problem with the Hoshidan sibling marriages: Birthright is built on the premise that this is Corrin’s real family, that Hoshido is her real home. It’s literally called Birthright. But if Corrin isn’t actually related to the Hoshidan Royals, all of that falls apart. They’re just strangers. The whole concept of the game doesn’t apply anymore. Because Intelligent Systems couldn’t release a game where the player insert doesn’t fuck literally every character. And, until we get to the point in Revelations where that is properly revealed, I’m going to pretend I don’t know it.

We got some new characters at the end of the last chapter, so let’s talk about them.

Silas

Silas is a cavalier who went turncloak for Corrin at the end of the last chapter because of a childhood friendship Corrin doesn’t remember. His personal skill makes him fight better when Corrin is injured. I’m starting to notice just how many of these skills specifically relate to Corrin, which makes sense but is still kinda weird. His design is fine, nothing objectionable there. I do think Silas’s forgotten childhood friend backstory is a bit odd, though. And I’m getting sick of characters who are obsessed with Corrin.

Saizo

Saizo is Kaze’s twin brother who looks like twenty years older than him. He’s the slower but tougher of the duo, judging from their stats. His personal skill Pyrotechnics is basically just him blowing shit up, which as far as I’m concerned is his solution to all problems. His mask is really weird looking, but at least he’s visually interesting. Personality wise, he seems like a dick, but in a good way. Our army needs some common sense and he brings it.

Orochi

Real talk: I forgot this character existed until she joined us. Orochi is a mage...er, diviner who has the personal skill Capture, which I’ll talk about later. Her design is decent; I like the sultry hair pulling in her portrait, it gives off a lot of personality. I don’t have much to say, I forgot she existed before the end of last chapter and have no clue what her personality will be.

Birthright Chapter 8: Fierce Winds

Team Corrin travels up the Eternal Staircase, a massive subterranean tunnel that leads to the Wind Tribe Village. Kaze notices that the group is being followed and a group of faceless pop out. Kaze and Corrin slaughter them with ease. Unfortunately, after the battle, the faceless turn into Wind Tribe civilians. Iago appears and explains that he disguised civilians as monsters using magic. He learned it from his favorite movie villain, the Joker from the Dark Knight, who Iago thinks is actually the good guy.

The gang reaches the Wind Tribe village. Corrin decides to just waltz in because sneaking past would be suspicious. Wind Tribe members attack. Not sure how they know about the whole slaughter thing. Maybe one of the fake faceless got away? Whatever.

Our three princesses apologize to the tribe members and they lead us to their chief, Fuga. Then the battle immediately begins. Guess negotiations didn’t go well.

Also here for some reason is Hinoka and her two retainers, Setsuna and Azama, both of whom are absolute morons. But, like, in a good way. Setsuna falls in quicksand, doesn’t care, and Azama immediately declares her dead. The fact that Hinoka has to basically babysit her two idiot bodyguards is amusing.

Setsuna

An Archer that works as Hinoka’s bodyguard. Her personal skill, Optimistic, makes her recover more when healed by a staff. A thing they do a lot in recent Fire Emblem games is to have characters that are based around specific gags or tropes. These are hit or miss, but Setsuna’s gag of constantly endangering herself and just not giving a shit sounds funny. The faced half-covered by hair initially makes her seem cool, but when paired with the dopey face and her personality it makes her look completely distracted. I like Setsuna, from what I’ve seen.

Azama

A monk who seems to be ridiculously optimistic and laid back. His personal skill, Divine Retribution, hurts opponents who attack him when he’s unarmed, which is a really cool idea. Azama doesn’t seem to be quite as funny as Setsuna, but still seems entertaining. I have mixed feelings on his design. I can’t tell if I like the closed eyes or not. The puffballs and wild hair are dumb though.

It’s worth noting that, because we move first, Corrin’s army attacks without provocation. Remember, they can’t see the red labels on enemies.

This map takes place in a desert. We can use the Dragon Veins to make it not a desert, which is good, because Fire Emblem deserts suck. Halfway through the battle, we finally talk to Fuga. He explains that we must earn the right to explain by killing all of his men. Bit of a dick move, chief.

We beat Fuga fairly easily. This chapter was fine, but just fine. Not bad, just unremarkable. Fuga explains that he was friends with Sumeragi and knows a lot about Yato. Apparently, us killing all of his men was a test to make us stronger so we can unlock Yato’s true power. Apparently, Yato can link something called the Sealed Flames and destroy the world. Neat.

Fuga accepts our explanation of the civilian murders. Which makes sense, it was kinda dumb. Actually, wait. Why did that have to be a plot point? Couldn’t this chapter just have been Fuga testing us?

Before we leave, Corrin and Azura discuss that there may be more blades like Yato out there. They don’t ask Fuga, because reasons. Also Fuga gives us his son. Neat.

[ironmansuuucks]

Cotton Candy Girl

dewey finn x reader 

Hey guys! so this is a sweet little fic me and the amazing @thewolfisapartofmysoul​ have been working on recently!! all about the Dewey content hehe! in this fic we have the reader wanting to finally break free from societies expectations and change up her appearance! We hope you enjoy reading it as much as we did writing it!!

warnings: fluff, angst, mention of smut 

aesthetic by the amazing @thewolfisapartofmysoul​ - we literally sobbed over that pic of dewey for like twenty mins straight lol 

You woke up just before Deweys alarm was gonna go off early in the morning as you did every morning. You watched Dewey with your eyelids still heavy with sleep. You cracked a tiny smile at his features. A tiny bit of drool tickled down his bottom lip when he snored. Your eyes moved from his drooling lips, to his scruffy cheeks, to his hair. His brown locks standing in every direction possible... you sighed, deeply content having him next to you. His hair never stopped to amaze you. It was just so fluffy, so soft... and so SO Dewey... 

You scooted closer to him, feeling the heat his body provided under the sheets. You lay your leg over his, brushed your ankle against his calf and went to push your nose against his. Your head on his pillow, nose-to-nose. You carefully reached out, combing your hand through his hair. Brushing your fingers through the soft brown curls and whispered your boyfriends name to wake him up.

 "....Dew.... Dewey.... You gotta wake up dear... Gotta teach the kids what Rock is about..."

 Dewey slowly opened his eyes, and a smile appeared on his face as soon as his eyes found yours. His hands gliding towards your waist, hugging you as close as possible his morning voice croaked out: "Morning sweetheart... you look beautiful today..." 

 He pulled you against him and nuzzled his nose deeply into the nape of your neck, sniffing deeply he sleepily whispered: "... not fair... you even smell beautiful..." You had to chuckle a bit at that weird compliment. Dewey calloused fingers brushed softly over your back, up and down over your spine. He kissed you sleepily and murmured "...so... SO... soft..."

 You pulled away with a giggle and pecked his nose. "Okay rockstar... time to start your day. Joining me for breakfast and coffee?" He pumped up his fists and cheered a: "Hell yeah, i am!" your way. Before you could reply he launched himself out of bed and whooped loudly when he reached the kitchen before you. He leaned against the kitchen table, proud sleepy smile on his face as he offered you his fist to bump. You knotted your eyebrows together in confusion and he chuckled: "... loser's gotta make the coffee..." As you scoffed, a smirk creeped up your face. Gosh what a weirdo. You rolled your eyes, pumped his fist and turned around to prepare the coffee machine. 

 As soon as you turned your back to him you felt his arms sneak around your waist, and his scruff against your neck, peppering you with light kisses. "...waking up with you is my favourite, love..." 

* * * *

You had to rush Dewey out of the door. Again. Leaving early never had been Dewey's strong suit, and having to leave you had doubled this problem. You just hoped he was gonna be on time for his lesson today. 

 You paced around in your apartment, you were doing that for the past hour or so. Feeling anxious but bubbling with excitement at the exact same time. You clenched the guitar-pick in your left pocket when you dialed the number of the piercing studio. Heart hammering in your chest as you kept pacing the room. Repeating the mantra Dewey had whispered when he gave it to you: '...stick it to the man... stick it to the man... stick it to the man... sti-" The phone stopped ringing and someone picked up. 

 You nervously told the lady on the phone what you wanted, and asked if she had time today... knowing that waiting only caused you more doubt. You knew you really wanted this. It was just... Low self esteem and overthinking could cause hell sometimes. You made an appointment for later that day. And you felt relieved, giddy in excitement and stressed at the same time. 

 You tossed your phone on the coffee table and only then noticed the strength you had been clenching the guitar-pick with. Your knuckles sore from holding onto the little trinket for dear life. You smiled a bit at the memory of Dewey, when he gave it to you.

 Dewey knew you struggled. With yourself. Your image of yourself had never been positive... You struggled with the expectations of society, wanting to please every soul on the earth. Even if it wasn't your cup of tea, you would move mountains to make people happy. To feel validated. To feel worthy. This included your behaviour as well as your looks. "Keep your hair long, cause it looks pretty on you. Simple clothing suits you well... i like it on you." Everyone around you had influenced your inner self. Until you met Dewey. From the beginning of your relationship he made sure to tell you daily how beautiful you were to him, no matter what you chose to wear. Or not to wear. How you were enough. How you were worthy. How you were loved.

The guitar-pick was given to you right after you told him you often thought badly of yourself. He pulled it out of his jacket, and pressed it into your palm. Telling you: "When i’m ever in doubt, feeling insecure or nervous... i hold this, and think: 'stick it to the man'." He had pressed a soft kiss on your temple and continued while he pulled you in a caring hug, his strong arms holding you as he cooed: "...whenever you feel like that, hold the lucky-pick and remember i’m near. I;m supporting you in everything you do. You are beautiful. Your soul is beautiful. You are enough and always will be. Dare to be fearlessly authentic, love. I love the whole you. And i always will." 

 A single tear spilled again at the memory. You pulled the guitar-pick out of your pocket to kiss it, feeling its strength. Dewey’s strength and trust, seep into your very core as you recalled that beautiful moment of intimacy you two had shared. It was beyond a physical bond, more of a soul-matching bond. You looked at the scribble he made on the pick, the black of the marker a bright contrast at the shiney purple pick. Dewey wrote on it: "Be you" You flipped it around it said: "Faith & Trust. Dewey" 

 You but the pick back in your pocket and ran a hand trough your hair, sighing nervously but proud of your decision. Nose piercing it was. And you were gonna rock it. Damnit. It was the 'stick-it-to-the-man-thing' to do, and you knew you wanted it. For you. Not for anyone else. You were done with being exactly what society expected you to be. Let them meet the real you instead. The real you deserved the world. Dewey always told you that. You eyed the hair in your hands as well... and with a deep sigh you also decided your hair needed to be freed from stupid standards as well. New you. Well... old you, with a new bit of confidence in your authenticity. Change was a good thing... 

 You still felt a bit anxious to follow through with your plan... but figured that this was what you really wanted to do. It felt good. It felt genuine. It felt... freeing. But a bit scary too. You clenched the pick even more tightly... You liked it... You just hoped with all your anxious, authentic heart that Dewey would like it too.

* * * * 

Running back up the stairs to your apartment got you out of breath quickly. You shoved the keys in, unlocking the door, and slammed the door behind you once you were in, throwing your back against it. “holy shit” you breathed in and out quickly, regaining your breath. You did it. You wiggled your nose, feeling the foreign object, that had been impaled on your right nostril, move. “ouch”. It was still fresh.

You darted over towards the bedroom mirror, jumping into view of yourself. You squealed excitedly at your freshly dyed locks, running your fingers through the soft, baby pastel pink. It was so pretty. You were SO proud of yourself for doing it. Going against societies values and expectations, giving them a big fuck you. You stuck your hands in your denim jacket pockets, posing in the mirror. And for the first time in a long time, you absolutely loved what you seen, closing one eye and sticking your tongue out. You felt good and you looked amazing.

You glanced down at your watch. It was almost four. Shit. Dewey would be home soon. Suddenly insecurity began to kick in as you looked up in the mirror at yourself again. Would Dewey like it? What if he hated it? Shit. Maybe this was a bad decision. Had you done the right thing? I mean, you could always nip to the store and get a box dye- “Baby, I’m home!” you heard Dewey come through the front door.

No, Dewey loves you he’s gonna love it. You looked in the mirror again, giving your pink curls one last floof before he laid eyes on you “yeah hey Dew, I’m in the bedroom!”. You could hear Dewey’s feet begin to pad through to the bedroom.

“aw babe you will not believe what the kids were telling me tod-“ he paused once he seen you standing over at the mirror. Your hands in your pockets and smiling sweetly at him. His eyes widened as they examined your new features. “stick it to the man, right?” you smirked at him. Dewey literally squealed as he bounced over to you, in awe at how pretty you were. He was so proud. “baby you look amazing!” he exclaimed, picking up your hair and running it through his fingers.

“do you like it?” you asked hesitantly. Dewey lit up “do I like it?!?! Babe I LOVE it?!?!”. Dewey pulled you into a tight hug “I’m so so so proud of you” you giggled at his antics. Once he let you go you squinted your eyes and looked down at your nose, wiggling it. Dewey looked at you confused but followed your eyes to your nose, and.. “DUDE!! NO WAY?!?! Can I touch it?” he asked lifting his hand up, but you moved your head laughing “no, it’s still sore”.

He looked at you adoringly and picked up your pink curls again “my cotton candy girl”, before he went to kiss you sweetly. But you banged noses, irritating your nose piercing slightly “ouch” you laughed. “ah I’m sorry”. You smiled at him, leaning in to kiss him again, exaggerating your head movement this time, “I forgive you”.

Dewey moved his hands to your waist and you threw your arms around his neck, deepening the kiss. “you know.. this whole.. stick it.. to the man… vibe.. is really.. sexy” he managed out between kisses. You hummed into him, “I’m glad you think so. Do you think this nose ring makes me look like a bad ass?” you smirked. “hell fucking yeah it does. My lil cotton candy bad ass” he kissed you again.

You kicked off yous shoes, still attached to Dewey. “how was your day?” you broke away from him but he leaned into kiss you again “that doesn’t matter right now – you do”. You giggled at him, kissing him back. Dewey pushed your jacket down your shoulders and you let it drop to the floor. He moved his hands to brush through the pink parts of your hair, then down to your shoulders and arms “mmmm.. so soft.. so proud of you” he hummed.

You flushed your body up against Dewey’s and you could feel the bulge growing in his pants. You giggled at him and knew what was coming next. Dewey brushed his hand up your arm to your tank top and bra strap, slowly pushing it down your shoulder. He moved his head and started leaving little kisses down your jaw, then your neck. You moaned lightly “Dew, it’s like after four we need to think about dinner soon” you giggled.

He hummed against your skin “the only thing I want for dinner is cotton candy”.

  Tags: @little-miss-shy-goth​ @paxenera​ @heknowshisherbs​ @missihart23​ @geminiacally​ @go-commander-kim​ @gegehaddock​ @baby-beej​ @sadpuppetshows​ @slowly-dying-of-boredom @hoodoo12​ @large-unit​ @thats-specific​ @vicunaburger​ @stranger-strings​ @bugdrinkss​

[nyarisu]

Völkerball liveblogging

Dear lord this took me so long to edit you better appreciate it

Reise reise

Oooo~ but I still like the Hellfest version more :)) (Till’s face during the Hellfest chorus will always be my sexuality)

Schneider’s costume is fabulous but I’ll never trust those curls

Also vampire Reesh that’s a good look

Asdfghjklthe vagina entrance XDDD they really had to

Hello nice legs

I’ve watched this only once because i don’t like the sound. Someone said Till was sick and I don’t know what actually happened but his voice kinda sounds like it, especially more towards the middle of the live.

But the chorus is still so nice~

The tongue via Till’s fucked up slut face

Olli’s really serious

"Ist kein Licht am Horizont" REESH DO YOU WANNA KILL ME?? That was one sexy face

I really love Till’s expressions i want to kiss his face

The eyes! And then looking up to the sky<3 (was there even a sky or was inside I didn’t even notice XD)

I really don’t like Paul and Flake’s costumes

Fucking god that entrance is craking me up

Links 234

Hei hei hei!

I love how they all march on the stage

Bwhbwbwhwbhwbwhw XD

That’s a nice middle to wrap your hands around, mr Lindemann

I love when he’s hittig his chest on “links”

THE FANGS

Paul means business XD

You can’t not sing with them during links

Oh the solo<3 sounds so nice live

Thank god my favourite person from this stupid band is also the one most filmes otherwise I would’ve been in trouble

Dem boobs XD

Keine lust

I thought it was Sonne for one sec

He kicked the mic stand XD

Now you can hear he’s a little raspy

Yes Till we know the lyrics’ meaning and also that you’re horny

The chorus sounds nice again, it sounds better when he’s actually siniging vs talking

Who’s foamning at the mouth over that patch of skin under his pants, I’ve seen people talk about that (unfortunately it’s doing nothing for me)

"kaaaalt. Soo kaaaalt" I’ll keep you warm bby just don’t be sad T_T

Ok but Flake’s headpiece is actually hilariuous gotta admit

I really want to kiss Till *opening his mouth like a retarded owl* I don’t think I want anymore

Feuer frei

That was his I’m ready to slut pose XD

DONT HIT YOURSELF YOU DUMB BABY

Ooooooh Olli got shirtless (what were they calling this?)

I really like RZK’s top

Of course he’s gotta bully Flake

Chumby

I’m really trying to focus more on image but the voice is such a big thing for me and it’s clear he has something

The masks!! I love those so much

„Jaaaa”

Wow Schneider’s drumsticks went out with a literal bang

Asche zu Asche

4 lines later I finally realised what song is >.< and only because Till began to sing...

DID YOU SEE WHAT HE WAS DOING WITH THOSE DRUMSTICKS?!? I knew why I had a thing for hands/fingers

Asdfghjkl Richard strutting down the stage with his little red stripe<3

He’s a moody goth and I love his look did he just put his hands on his hips? XD

Till’s cheeks! I want to pinch his face

Everyone’s favourite part and THE NECK TILT ok wow now that was hot

Tho I usually preffer the “In zehn Tagen” to RZK’s “Ich komm wieder” now it was the opposite (probably because I couldn’t see Till that well) and Reesh acting all sexy was definitely improving it

Go Flake go XD he’s so serious and by the end he’s having the time of his life meanwhile Till is having an existential crisis (another)

Olli’s abs are heeeeella nice

Till with his hand over his heart didn’t help his case

Yeah Richard ok you’re sexy i get it holly fuck I’ve never been more attracted to him

And now i’ll never be able to unsee the neck tilt

That ich kom wieder just unmade me

Morgenstern

Bath time XD

I really like when Till slicks his hair back

Dear lord the chorus thank you for your voice sir and congrats on it

I really like the general image of a bassist playing their bass (other verb I could’ve used was fingering XD that’s literally what he’s doing!!)

Ooooh the keyboards sound so nice<3

DON’T pluck your eyes out!

The fire part is really impressive

I love then Richard is doign his gay boy pose XD and then the closeup on him while bobbing his head

I need to say once again the chorus sounds wundershon

Mein Teil

The first 2 seconds I thought it was MHB

Paul and Richard walking towards each other<3

Aaaand the epicness begins!

Schneider is fabulous behind his drums, can’t forget about him

YEET

The tongue’s is at it again

FLAKE POPING UP WITH THAT SMILE CRACKED ME UP you demented human

People are rocking the hell out this song

“durch Engelsscharen” Till’s expression<3

And the maddnes begins. Wow it was shorter than usual... obviously, it was at the beginning

Flake has such a special style of running I can’t XD

Stein um Stein

And everyone is gonna talk about him drawing a house xD it was cute (considering what the song is about)

You’re being a slut again

Aaaaah I want to complain about the playback but I really can’t I rather prefer him with vocal cords. At least the rest of the song sounded excelent!

The little sound at the end of „sein” and his face: childish enjoyment while talking about fucked up shit. If this doesn’t perfectly summarize Till then I don’t know what does

Schenider’s smile

No but really beside the screeching parts he sung it so well!

Were they trying to film Richards crotch? Whatever he’s sexy

Another reason why I watch this only once before was me being kind of meh regarding Till’s look he’s my favourite after all I gotta act the part

Los

My fucking god Scheider’s legs! I fucking love thighs. And he has a nice ass too

Richard’s smile!! Don’t kill me

Is it me or does Till start to stare into space and look generally Not Ok (tm)?

„fucking mickey mouse” XDDD

Los is among the last 10 songs on my list I usually just skip it

I died when I saw him with a harmonica the first time

Flake and Olli XD

Don’t manhandle poor Flake (I really want to say I wish that were me but knowing myself I would probably just deck Till in the face XD)

The sunglasses are sick

RZK and Till headbaning<3

Rip (rest in pieces) to keyboard

Du riechts so gut

THE BOW! The cute flamingo pose aside, that bow is one of my favourite pyro effects ever

And then the synchronised bodybanging<3

That „pang” never sounded so good?

WHY THE FUCK DID YOU EVEN MENTIONED THE NECK TILT REESH IS SO SEXY HERE I CAN’T EVEN

The deepest he sings the lees you hear the raspiness

Lord! The whole audience just fucking went for it

Schneider’s muscles, Richard’s little smirk and Till zombie 2.0

Even more bodybanging. Flake is enjoying himself

WHAT THE FUCK WHY ARE YOU SO PRETTY?!? (me to Richard)

Flake casually going back to his keyboards uthgjkhfzc that looked so cool and smooth

I promise I still drool over Till just... Richard is so prettily standing there! I cant ignore him!

The firesleeves are so cool and it looks so good, especially with them facing different ways

And freeze! Nice and dramatic

Till hammer time

That one guy really feeling the „DRSG” in the audience XD

Benzine

3 consecutive thought: it is Benzine fuck yeah, I can never tell if it’s Benzine or Keine Lust, Till’s terrified face

The most Rammstein song to ever Rammstein

Paul going wild XD but I still don’t like his hat

Flake is spazzing again

Du hast

Thank god I’m actually enjoying this song now, I skipped it for half a year

The drums and the beginning and the keyboards are <3

The tongue >w<

People are going wild

I like Richard’s dramatic gesturing. Pretty rockstar boy

The chorus sounds so good

Flake what is that on your head? XD is he a One Piece character?

Did he just casually shoved the mic into his pocket? XD

I much more preffer the newest effect from Paris onwards (which is also my top favourite)

Sehnsucht

This song has a very special and unique feel to it probably because it screams Live aus Berlin more than any other (and now I feel like watching LAB again)

It’s the chanting in the background probably

He’s sounding sick again :(

You have muscles in the arms (and probably legs too) and chumby in the belly it’s perfect

Lol @ Paul trying to look scary

„SEHNSUCHT!”

Ok Richard honey you can stop with the sexy neck tilt

He’s slapping the hell out of his guitar

Please stop pulling your hair out

Amerika

@Flake on that thing: wierd flex but ok

Sexy fishnet legs

Wow that’s a really soft and nice opening, pretty unexpected

LOL Flake taking off his hat like „sorry for your loss” but considering the song it’s expected from him XD

Beauatiful eyes<3

He’s just nyooming from one side of the stage to the other? XD

That eyeliner looks so fucking good on Till

Flake is suffering :)) (what the fuck was I talking about I can’t remember now that I’m editing)

Even Richard’s hair looks pretty! What the fuck??

The last scene with Schneider (and then his legs)

Rammstein

Those are some fucking guns he has right there

This is the most badass intrumental intro ever

“Scheeeeeein”

Oooooh so this is where that gif was coming from for some reason it thought it was Engel from MSG. Does this live even has Engel on it?

I love when drummers throw their sticks in the air and then catch them again

Ok the image of Till slowly backing off between Paul and Richard who were both vibing in their own way was really nice

Sonne

Schneider is enjoiying this isn’t he XD

For some reason this song doesn’t seem as energic as it usually is?

Was Till humping the mic stand? (more likely than you’d think)

Seing Flake and Till doing the hammer side by side is really funny, that’s some size difference

Ich will

Bye bye mic stand again

Till baby what did you do with your throat to make your voice sound like that?

Richard looking to the side during „ich will” hhhhhHhh

Let me slap that ass Till

I want to lick your face

Ohne dich

Ollie what are you doing

Asdfhjkl Flake comforting Till and the way he just rests his head on Flake’s shoulder is breaking my heart

Poor baby come here and let me love you

You can clearly see he’s trerrified

Lsnhxkvj his eyes<3

Nawwww they are kissing

I am silently thristing over Till don’t mind me

Please don’t cry T_T and then him looking over his bangs sfdghjkl

„is he... ya know” pose with a hand in the air Heirate mich style (aka Till Lehmann is a sub)

Look I know he’s suffering and all but I really can’t focus on that with all the water dripping off him

Stripped

No wonder I didn’t recognised the song it doensn’t even exist to me XD

Till pointing like „you. drop your panties. now” XD

I had half a mind to skip it but then I would have missed Till’s wonderful tongue performance

Was he flicking it to the rythm??

Hearing him sing in english is always so weird (I only recently rediscovered the gem the Children of the Sun is)

Richard what was that sexy face?

Ollie is braving the human seas, telepathy at its finest XD

Hmm that is a really nice lower back

Gangsta XD „how do you do fellow kids”

Paul is enjoying the show

Schneider has killer looks. Literally XD

YEET

Conclusions:

Half of it went really slow and then the other half went really fast? I don’t understand what happened

So this is the setting for Mit Dir Bin Ich Auch Allein... ok, good to know ;)

You sure this was a good idea 4 songs in and I already wrote 2 pages, now the total is at 6.

I’m not particulary fond of the looks and Till sounds sick so I usually avoid this live. Also some songs are weird with the energy so yeah

Richard is so pretty I can’t (and fucking hot how come I don’t remeber this??)

[freewithyourtempo]

Argue me tender, argue me true (pt. 8)

part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4 part 5 part 6 part 7

Charles was zombing his way across the hall. He felt ashamed and vulnerable, with his guts inside out. He was on edge, waiting mindlessly for anyone to start laughing at his stupidity.

Not that he thought that he would make fun of what had happened…

When he heard someone calling his name, Charles considered ignoring them. He tried to sink in his own shoulders and turned towards the voice. The principal’s secretary was hurrying towards him and waving something shiny in his hand. “Xavier,” he huffed, reprimanding. His forehead was damp and he looked like he had spent the morning rolling up and down the sleeves of his shirt and moving boxes. “Here, keep this.” Something small and cylindric was hastily put in Charles’ hand. It was the key to his collar. “What is-” “Now that it is done, please tell your friend Erik Lehnsherr to reshape the locks of our offices and toilets. Maybe we can’t prove that it was his doing, but we certainly know it was. We are keeping an eye on him. Have a nice day.”

He stomped away leaving Charles gaping in the middle of the corridor. Charles looked down at the key in the center of his palm and closed his fingers around it. “Fuck. Couldn’t you be a bit less. Fuck you, Lehnsherr.” “I thought you were about to do just that.” Charles tiredly hauled his lips in a smile and faced his just arrived friend. “He didn’t like me that much, Moira.” He shrugged with one shoulder. “It happens.” Mora frowned in confusion and adjusted the strap of her bag on her shoulder. “How do you-” “I…” Charles rubbed his arm and looked away. “I may have told him that I liked him when I was drunk after Azazel’s party. He told me it was better if I went away.” Moira blinked and tilted her head. “It’s just… So weird.” She admitted frankly. “Like, really weird.” “How so?” “Have you seen Davis around, lately?” “I don’t even know who he’s supposed to be.” Moira rolled her eyes. “The bag of dicks that pushed you against the wall last week.” “Oh,” Charles said. He remembered that day for a different reason altogether. “What’s up with him?” Moira didn’t even try to hide her pleased, seraphic smile. “He has a black eye and a dislocated jaw. He hasn’t been able to mutter his homophobic and mutantphobic shit since that day.” She folded her arms and raised one suggestive eyebrow. “Does that mean anything to you?”

Charles stammered. “I-It doesn’t mean anything,” he denied. The bruise on Lehnsherr's face was freshly painted in his mind. His heart sunk in his stomach and started hammering there. “Lehnsherr has always advocated for mutants. He would have done the same for anyone.” Evidently. “He beat the shit out of him, Charles. He risked suspension. At best. Probably expulsion.” Moira eyed the key in his hand and stared. “Twice this week, I would say.” Charles shrugged again, because he didn't know what to say to that. 

Lehnsherr wasn't interested, had said that much. It was better not to dwell on things that almost were. Charles sighed. Or weren’t, apparently, because it was all in his head. He probably spent too much time in there. Moira huffed. “Do you think I should go thank him for this?” Charles asked, holding the key between his thumb and index. Moira linked their arms. “I really think you should, Charles, if you feel like it.”

Charles heard a commotion, then the door of the classroom swung open and banged against the opposite wall. Someone gasped. 

Hank appeared on the threshold, pale and agitated. 

“McCoy!” The professor exclaimed. “What on Earth is happening?” “I’m really, really sorry, professor,” Hank answered, and he was so upset that his skin was swinging between blue and white. “But I need Charles. Immediately.” Charles stood up and Hank turned towards him. “It’s about Alex. We’d ask Lehnsherr, but we can’t find him anywhere…” Charles pulled the key out of his back pocket and shoved it in the collar. It clicked open with a mechanical swish, and Charles tossed it on the desk. 

Voices arose in his head as he had just turned the volume on. “Where is he?” “Park, behind the cafeteria,” Hank answered. Charles hurried down the stairs and together they ran across the corridor. 

Alex was standing in the middle of the park, alone. The grass around him was scorched and greyish, and Charles could smell smoke. 

Alex’s shirt was pulsing red in correspondence of his chest. 

“Oh, thank you, fuck,” he said when he saw Charles stepping towards him, Hank on his tow. He was shivering from head to toe. “Just knock me out already.” “There’s no need for that, Alex,” Charles said, keeping his voice steady. His throat was tight. “Take it easy.” Alex scoffed angrily, and the red in his chest heightened. He clenched his fists and snarled. “Easy? I was about to explode in the middle of the Cafeteria, Xavier. Fucking explode.”

Charles could feel anger, and frustration, and biting terror howling and scratching at his shields like rabid dogs. Everything was flashing red and white, everything was swirling, his mind was cracking under the blows of panic. But above all else he felt a growing heat right over his stomach, boiling and buzzing, ready to cut through his flesh. 

“But you didn't, Alex. You controlled it.” “Barely.” Alex looked away, chest heaving. His muscles were strained in the effort of keeping the energy inside his body. “I can’t do this. I shouldn’t be here. I can’t, why don’t you understand. I just can’t.” “But you do, you can,” Charles replied firmly, and stepped forward. “You have been here for months, don’t let one slip up mess with your head.” “My slip-ups could cost lives!” “Mine too,” Charles said, smiling sadly. “And Erik’s, or Janos’. You deserve to be here, Alex, and you're making wonderful progress every day. People want you here and will help you. I promise.”

The raw dogs had receded now, and while Alex looked him in the eyes, vulnerable and hopeful, Charles could only feel angry birds screeching. Terror was no longer stabbing his shields, but Alex's thoughts had to be directed elsewhere, or they could start collapsing on themselves all over again. “Besides, you can’t go before declaring yourself.” Alex’s mind snapped in surprise, as if kicked out of track. His eyes flashed towards a point behind Charles, where Hank had been fidgeting for the last five minutes. 

Hank held his breath loudly.

“You’re such a little shit,” Alex accused Charles, blushing furiously and looking at everything that wasn’t Hank. Charles smirked through a fog of embarrassed excitement. “I never said whom you should declare to, dear. But it has been a long time coming, so...” Alex glared under thick eyebrows, but at least his body had stopped trembling and glowing red. “You’re one to talk,” he huffed and folded his arms. “Clearly you and Lehnsherr still have your heads up your asses.” It was Charles’ turn to gape, but immediately stopped when he saw Alex sneering. “Your sources are unreliable, I’m afraid. There’s nothing between us.” Alex raised an eyebrow. “Says who.” Charles swallowed. “Says he.” “That’s not what--” Alex stopped and lifted his hands in surrender. “Know what. Not my business. Morons. Sexual tension is so thick between you two not even my blasts could cut through it. It’s disgusting.” “Mmh,” came Hank thoughtful voice. “I’ll have to vouch for that.” “Shut up,” Charles grumbled, cheeks flagging hot in embarrassment. “I came here to help, and look at what I have to endure. I don’t deserve this.” “You started it.” “Count to one hundred, and if you’re still not shooting lasers through your nostrils by then, you’re good to go. Undeserving scoundrel.”

This time Charles knocked. 

He had this whole speech prepared, schemingly littered with thankfulness and apologies about ill-time confessions, and closed by a joke to lighten up the mood. He felt clear-minded and self-possessed, with steady hands and a firm voice. He raised his mental shields. He swallowed against the heart in his throat. He also felt nauseous, but that was irrelevant, all things considered. He just needed to breathe and stick to the scenario sprawled out in his mind. No interruptions, no blubbering, no undignified ogling… 

The door swung open. Lehnsherr was steaming hot. Literally. Fat droplets of water clung to the wet tips of his hair and splashed on his neck to ran down the collar of his shirt, darkening the fabric. The bare skin of his arms and throat glistened and puffed slow swirls of steam. He was barefoot. Charles closed his mouth audibly and irritably. “Oh, fuck me.”

@helene-of-spain , @youarerageandserenity, @why-cant-people-just-think, @auri-moon , @starkqnthony, @docty-strange , @starkxavier, @ectoplasmaticpansexual, @season-four-is-imminent, @ unticka

[ryouverua]

Trial 5 - Post-Execution

Investigation 1 / 2 - second half is where I put my own theories that I penned before playing the trial.

Trial: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8

Pre-Execution

;’’’) That’s a good look on you, Monokuma.

what this no i’m not crying you’re crying shUT UP

Have any other executions ended with the corpse literally landing in front of them in the trial room? I feel like this is a first???

uUM

K.... K1-b0? Buddy? Are - uh - are you okay? You’re looking a bit.... ?????

A-ARE YOU THOUGH -

Uh, okay??? So I want to go over Kaito’s execution and be upset about his death and everything but suddenly, this? This came out of nowhere??? also skldfj they took the ahoge off his sprite too omg

Crap I badly want to mourn Kaito for a while and yeah this is taking away from that but I don’t exactly want to not address K1-b0 literally BSoD-ing in front of us -

Oh! Gloating! I’m good for gloating too. Rub it in his face, Sweetcheeks. You’ve got my full backing here.

Normally I’m against kicking someone while they’re down but KICK HIM! KICK KICK KICK! I’m so down for this collective group smack-down.

Man, this Monokuma has been so much less in control and emotional than the previous Monokumas. I mean, the competition is pretty stacked - last Monokuma was literally the god of his world and an omniscient being that pervaded their entire ecosystem with one exception - but between throwing up a second motive in the first chapter, getting ‘overthrown’ by Monodam ** (even if he ‘went on vacation’ and this entire chapter, this ^ guy is barely hanging on by his teeth.

** I just realized the whole ‘Monodam takes over the killing game’ may have been bloody foreshadowing for this chapter sdlkfj

Monodam even got pushed to his limit for all of a whole chapter/killed two Monokubs and even though Kokichi didn’t directly kill them, he does have Gonta and Miu’s aka two classmate’s blood on his hands even with the most charitable look at chapter 4′s events before both Monodam and he ultimately take actions to end their own lives

this has been another mini-episode of ‘I read into things too much’

ANYWAY quietly skips over everything but the most pertinent Monokub dialogue, don’t mind me ~

Who would though, at this point? .... K1-b0, depending on what’s going on with him right now?

Shuichi is so pumped up thanks to Kaito and Kokichi’s teamwork! This has to be what Kaito was hoping for. Kokichi probably wanted to win the trial in its entirety, though...

Something about him saying ‘you’re certainly entitled to your opinion’ is incredibly grating and hilarious. It’s so.... passive-aggressive and banal? So un-Monokuma? I feel like behind the plushie, someone is pouting with their arms crossed tightly and just grumbling to themselves. They can’t even muster up a whole ~despair~ rant right now.

SWEETCHEEKS SWORE :O

I want to make a fun reference to Saimota but then I remember Kaito’s corpse is still warm on the ground a few feet away from them and I cry

LMAO IT SWITCHED TO A SILENT K1-B0 IMMEDIATELY AFTER....

K1-b0 isn’t about to like... become a killing game enforcer or something??? Like, completely flip his switch? fml this silence is dangerous

blah blah blah monokubs do their ‘cute’ schtick and I get tired of it, anyway -

oh great, it’s the sprite I blocked out of my brain up to this point

DID MONOPHANIE JUST DRAG ME

Please put away the tongue when they leave ffs

Aaah damn it, here comes the hammer. D:

Participant......... and then he mentioned about it going on for a long time, so.... a cycle...??? If Rantaro is repeating it, does that mean they’re all repeating it...??? The same sets of personalities/memories/talents, in new bodies every time or something - ? Is that an idea I should follow -

FFFF DID MONOKUMA JUST FLASH US

YES, PUN FULLY INTENDED SOMEONE HAS TO MAKE THOSE JOKES IN MIU’S ABSENCE

yeah hilariously while I was starting to think more about his statements Monokuma literally surprised me just like he surprised Shuichi and the rest of them lmao

Meanwhile Sweetcheeks is just twitching beside her, possibly even foaming at the mouth -

YEAH WHERE’S THE NEXT SET OF MEMORIES, BUDDY

anyway he talks about despair and hope again, I glare at the yellow text with tired resignation, etc

It really does sound like it’s something that’s repeating when he puts it like that, right??? And with Rantaro’s video - what is this, a test simulation of the gopher project or something?

Another wild theory appears - the original students with the talents Makoto/Hope’s Peak wanted to preserve, or for whatever reason digitized their memories/personalities/talents (think Gonta Alter-Ego) died - or were ‘hunted down’ aka the Ultimate Hunt - and in their place they pick up 16 ordinary kids to give them to, possibly by force. Or hell, maybe not, if Rantaro remembers and said something like ‘you wanted this’, though wasn’t that in regards to the killing game???  And then... they set up a simulation? Maybe? To test their viability? .... The question is who introduced Monokuma to the whole thing. Is that part of the test, or was that the cult sneaking in... and if the students really are ‘easily replaceable’, are they just picking up new ordinary kids as replacements? Are they looking for an outcome where they can defeat Monokuma? If this is a simulation, does it operate under the same rules as the NeoWorld program, where they die in real life?

Eeh... not sure how I feel about this. It feels like it has holes still. 8′D

ffffffff

!!!!!!

Aaaaw....

I mean I think we knew after the deductions in the first chapter but yes, mastermind confirmed - ! And -

WHAT

NO

WHAT

NO

WHAT

N O

W H A T

please go away

I-I MEAN... YOU REALLY DON’T.... HAVE TO...

BANGS HEAD AGAINST WALL

asdlkfjsdl why junko WHY MUST YOU BE BACK

So I was going to put this at the end of the post but then A LOT OF STUFF happened at the end of the chapter and it... doesn’t really fit there....

Okay... t-there is a second option. I mean, Junko could really be back for the third (fourth? do Shiro/Kurokuma in UDG count?) time and I really hope that isn’t the case fff - but ‘Junko’ facing away from us for a reason, right? Which means it could be someone dressed as her, right? Even if it did sound like her seiyuu...

But out of everyone left, assuming this isn’t happening at the exact same time/immediately after the trial... well, I mean, out of everyone alive, two people could be in Junko-dress right now, right? Both Maki and Tsumugi could fit, and considering we haven’t gotten to look at Tsumugi at all and her talent... I’m heavily leaning towards her.

..... except.................. cospox though. Crap. Hmm....

I think... I could maybe follow up on some of the speculating I made in this post? About Junko being elevated to a larger-than-life figure in history? Maybe there’s some leeway in there, in the same way that we have historical figures that end up being featured prominently in fiction, or even become warped/satirized in various ways because they’re so removed from us in our current time... and perhaps Junko has become more than a person in that same way, or even more than that, a title/role that can be inherited and passed down? Is it possible to get around cospox that way? It would fit in with her early Chapter 1 comments - let me see if I can dig them up from my old posts - ah this one, here, if you want to look at it. i also am totally into what she’s saying if you’re wondering why I remember this so well lmao

If she is from the cult... and this is a parallel to Angie, who constantly spoke about being a conduit for Atua’s message, Korekiyo, who was just a vessel for his sister according to himself, and Kaito, who literally acted in Kokichi’s place............. maybe....... this could work........... ????

...... except I don’t know if it’s enough of a stretch to get around this. I MEAN. MAYBE IT IS. MAYBE. I could just be stretching reeeeeeally far in order to avoid an inevitable Junko returning. maybe i just want to see the power of the ultimate cosplayer since it’s a hobby so dear to my heart idek

Whelp it doesn’t matter the scene is moving on without me anyway so 8′D

FUCK NO MORE TRAINING TIME OR TRAINING JOKES OR STUPID TITLES FOR THE TRAINING POSTS THIS IS THE WORST TIMELINE

Man I really love the close connections Shuichi has to people in this game. Maybe that’s why I’ve been enjoying it so much? He recognizes his classmates and what they have to offer, sure - but he’s a regular kid. He’s got his favoured connections, and the people whose deaths he feels more powerfully than the others, and the reactions he has to everything around him... well, maybe that’s my own bias because they really resonate with me. I don’t usually have much of an interest for audience surrogate characters (I don’t dislike them, I just, you know, don’t adore them or anything) but - and I know now that this is a divisive topic - I really like Shuichi’s personality. I really do. And I think he has one. He’s a quiet guy - he keeps most of his thoughts on the inside - and I get that for a lot of people, quiet = no personality, but the way he has responded to a lot of the situations that have come up previously have both been different than what I’m used to seeing from ‘protagonist’ characters and, erm, pretty... familiar to me personally and that has been a bit of a shock tbh. seriously what’s with this - same birthday, same blood-type, same hobbies, likes and dislikes, same Best Boy, etc....

I’m not sure where this tangent is going tbh, but I guess I’m sorta gearing up for next chapter? We don’t have many people left to work with. 8′D Kaito’s gone, Kokichi is gone, and all we have left are a collection of differing quiet personalities. It’s going to be very, very different, that’s for sure.

“Oh yeah I forgot this turned into a group activity like, three sessions in.”

“I mean, you did too by poisoning them both, but that’s neither here nor there.”

I am being a bit harsh on her though - to her credit, she seemed initially confused about why he was blaming himself (despite him repeating all the things she said to him during the beginning of the trial). There’s no one left to connect them now and she seems to have realized that - they’re going to have to finally do the heavy work themselves.

Like Chapter 4 Maki, I feel like she’s speaking in that same roundabout way she did when asking about Shuichi’s interest in Kaede. “Are you lonely too?” or even, “do you need someone to talk to/be with who understands how you feel?” She still has a lot of trouble being forthright but it’s great that she’s taking the initiative, especially after her earlier confession.

I hate to say it, but I think Shuichi may have ended up in a similar state as Ryoma after Chapter 1 if he was left spinning his own wheels...

Solidarity. 8′/

!!! 

For all the things that he did... fml I can’t think of anything better. He spent so much of his time trying to bring you both out of your shells!

I wonder if Shuichi is including his entire class in there. It was only a few days ago that Kokichi said he considered them all friends too. Also Korekiyo hilariously enough

omg they’re still so painfully awkward but it’s so sad and relatable and they’re trying to start building a bridge without Kaito acting as their support...

Ooh! This is the first time they’ve been approached aside from Tenko in Chapter 3, right?

Aaaw he’s so happy to see them. 8′)

YES!!! New team training! New team training!

Yes this is exactly what they need to do after the trial! They need to stick together! ... Now where the hell is K1-b0???

quietly skips over Tsumugi telling us we won’t lose to despair because I am stubbornly clinging to the time before hope/despair was brought back up -

- Sweetcheeks why

so much goddamn hope

But I’ll allow it because it’s leading to an overdue cheesy friendship speech and after the tragedy of chapter 5 I need that right now.

Though... hm. I was sort of hoping Shuichi and Maki could hash out some of her actions in the last trial, or Maki would offer some kind of apology. Would that have happened if they weren’t interrupted?

Yeeessss new image! I love it! Also lmao Himiko maybe you’d manage to finish one if you took the big bulky hat off...

Good - a commitment to keep living is important, especially from Shuichi. Now the majority of you are carrying someone’s wish, huh... except Tsumugi, unless you count Gonta maybe. I figure Miu could count for K1-b0, though I guess that’s a bit of a stretch too?

fuck my heart had been ripped out and stomped on, especially with the flashback to third chapter training:

.... See you, Space Cowboy.

Now fade to bla -

..... Huh.

I’m glad one of you is concerned after what happened. 8′/ I’ll excuse Shuichi and Maki because they have every right to be distracted by grief but between you and Himiko you couldn’t keep an eye on him?

Because seriously, none of them know where he is. And there is no way that’s a good thing.

BUT SOLIDARITY!!! also robophobic!!!

Well that’s an ominous way to end the chapte - oh never mind it’s not over??? What, three ‘epilogues’ this time? Not that I’m complaining because I’m happy to extend the trial for as long as necessary but jeez -

K.... K1-b0???

It was lost after the accident??? So it wasn’t just programming... a... a transmission then? So it really was some sort of antenna...

Wait that makes it sound like you weren’t just using it for guidance but actually being controlled by it?!

More hope and despair references -

Music change???

Wait, dude, what do you mean by that -

What

WAIT WHAt ARE THOSE TURBOBOOSTERS

HE CAN FLY?!?!

UM EXCUSE ME WHERE DID THIS COME FROM

Kokichi was dying to see all of these cool functions and only now when he’s literally dead do you show them off? RUDE

WAIT WHAT THE FUCK K1-B0 THERE ARE STILL LIVING STUDENTS DOWN THERE

MISSILES TOO -

OH WOW UM OKAY THIS WAS NOT THE QUIET CONTEMPLATIVE END-OF-CHAPTER SCENE I THOUGHT WE’D BE GETTING DEAR LORD

dON’T YOU ‘END TITLE’ CARD ME, GAME

a;sdlkfja

i

i forgot this

happened at the end of the

chapter

oh god

skldfj

ugh, ghghhgh

cool thanks sweetcheeks and I will cherish this forever,,,

...

assuming he survives long enough to

[dyke-remy]

Live And Let Die, part 6

Part 1      Part 2      Part 3     Part 4     Part 5 

Description: Agent 008 and Agent 009, professional spies for the MI6 with liscense to kill. Partners in both work and love. After an agent goes missing the partners have to once more go out into the field. (It’s a James Bond AU)

You don’t need to know anything about James Bond to be able to read this fic, trust me

Tw: Accidental misgendering here and there, some light torture

Words: 3611

Remus woke up in a cold sweat. His body ached and his head seemed to be banging in rhytm with his heart. He was staring into a grey concrete wall but it was weird because the ceiling looked like the floor and the floor looked like the-

Oh. Oh he was hanging upside down. He strained himself to look upwards and there was indeed rope all around his limbs that tied him to the ceiling. He could barely even move his fingers, much less his head.

"009?" He called out. He tried not to sound too worried but failed miserably.

"008!" Remy exclaimed back. To both of their's relief it didn't sound like they were far apart.

"I'm right here. Are you okay?"

"It doesn't matter but yes I'm tots 100% good"

"It matters to me!"

Remus swung a bit back and forth in the air and to his surprise his head struck something else. "009 are you-"

"That's me alright" Remy leaned their head back so they felt each other's warmth.

For a few moments they stayed like that without saying anything. As long as they could touch each other, as long as they knew the other were there, everything felt safe.

"You're okay right? Nothing happened after I blacked out?" Remy asked.

"Nothing too bad...but...I....I think I might have been hit by Jaws. Didn't see his face though"

Remy let out a quiet gasp "Jesus fuck. The bitchy brat got Jaws and everything on his side huh"

"I'm not a brat!" Virgil's voice came from somewhere Remus couldn't see.

The agent felt hands grab his shoulders and force him around. He saw Virgil with his back turned to him, he was turning Remy around the same way so the agents were looking at each other. The enby was tied to a steel chair. There even was a rope around their neck so they could barely turn their head.

"You gonna torture us? Gonna torture us with your lil baby hands?" Remy asked with a shit eating grin. In response they got a back handed slap to the face.

Remus tried to glance around. They were in what looked like a garage that had been turned into an improptu torture chamber. Tools (knifes, hammers, guns) laid on a table and next to it stood Theo, the bodyguard.

His eyes stagnated on Virgil. His hands began to shake.

"Where you hiding your lil Jawsie now tho? Aint so scary without him" Remy continued to tease.

"Do you seriously think the two of you pose enough of a threat to need Jaws here" Virgil rolled his eyes "I'm sure he's in his box or something-"

"You- You're-"

Remus' voice was shaky as he stuttered it out. He was staring at Virgil as if he was looking at a ghost.

"I know you"

Virgil glanced at him before looking over to Theo. He let out a few dry chuckles and the bodyguard laughed along.

"You're- Virgil- You're the kid- you were there when Ro- my brother died"

A sick smile spread over his lips "Of course I was. And you're Remus. And Roman is dead"

He expected the agent to lash out. To scream and shout and try to claw his way out of the ropes just to hurt him. Virgil knew he was the reason the previous 009 got killed. It was the only logical reaction.

"I'm sorry" The genuine, nearly tearfilled, tone on Remus' voice caught him off guard "You were just a kid. I'm sorry we weren't able to help you. We- I saw how your dad treated you. Me and my brother wanted to get you out of there I promise"

The teenager took a step back. He closed his hands into fists. His nails pierced into his skin until blood dripped out.

Remus lowered his voice and tried to keep eyecontact with him "We can help you now though. If you unbound us we can knock out that big stupid bodyguard and take you somewhere safe. No one will hurt you again. I'll make sure of it"

Virgil stared at him with rage in his eyes. He grabbed onto the agent's jaw and forced his head closer. "Your brother dying was a good thing"

Remus tried to say something back but it was as if his mouth had stopped listening to his brain.

"Y'know when I was younger I would always cry like a baby whenever I saw my dad kill someone" Virgil continued in a low voice "But your brother looked so Pathetic when he died that I never cried over another death again. That was the only thing he was ever good for. Just a maggot to look disgustingly pathetic before being crushed to death"

"Shut up" Remus growled out.

"And wow! Running away like a coward was a truly amazing move! The moment you left your brother started to sob. That bastard begged my dad to let him live and everything! He just kept going until-"

"Shut up!"

"-Until his voice was so hoarse and he was so close to death all he could do was keep crying out for you. I don't even think he was aware of it! It was all just sobs about hugging you and your mom until he died! Just as he deserved!"

"HE DIDN'T DESERVE ANYTHING LIKE THAT!" Remus yelled out "HE DESERVED A LIFE MUCH MORE THAN I DO! YOU DON'T-"

"Darling. Darling look at me" Remy said calmly.

Remus stopped and glanced over at them. Tears were welling up in his eyes. "I deserve to die more than he did-"

"Babe that doesn't matter right now. Virgil is just trying to get you emotional so you'll be more likely to say what he wants you to say. Just follow my breathing okay? In for 4. Hold for 7-"

"Out for 8. I know. I know" Remus forced out between short breaths.

"It's okay babe just-"

"You shut the fuck up!" Virgil shouted "Theo make him shut up!"

The bodyguard promptly went up behind Remy and forced their mouth open. They tried to bit his hand but was stopped when a piece of barbed wire was pulled around their head so the largest part of it laid dangerously in their mouth.

"Thanks" Virgil took a deep breathe to try and not explode with annoyance "So Remus. 008. Whatever. You got the privilege of hanging upside down because you were such a heartless Bitch and killed 3 of my spiders! That's like killing 3 baby puppies you monster!!"

He went over to the table filled with tools and picked up a crowbar. It looked a bit too heavy in his hands. He rolled up the sleeves of his hoodie and took a firm grip on the weapon, clearly ready to swing it at the agent.

"Your brother's life was worth less than my spiders, you realize that right. So you'll pay for it" He lifted the crowbar above his head "This is for-"

"Sir!" Theo interrupted "You're holding it wrong. You'll easily hurt your wrists unless you shift your right wrist and move your left hand a bit up. It'll hurt the cretin more as well"

Virgil sent him a small smile and shifted how he held the crowbar "Thanks"

He slammed it into Remus' ribcage.  "This is for Max!" The next hit landed on the side of his hip "This is for Dante!" The last one landed on his arm "And this is for Charlotte!"

He lowered the crowbar while letting out heavy breathes. His black hair had fallen in front of his eyes and his mouth was twitching upwards into a smile. Remus didn't even seem bothered by the hits. It really had felt like being hit by a kid. If anything the reminder of his brother's death hurt more than Virgil beating him ever could.

"So now when we all agree that your brother deserved to die and all 00 agent's lives are worthless we can continue onto the interrogation! Theo please let the maggot speak again so I can beat the answers out of both of them"

Theo made sure the barbedwire dragged into Remy's skin as he dragged it out of their mouth. Their teeth were colored red from blood. They immediately tried to spit the blood into Theo's face and let out a fake moan when he slapped them in return.

Virgil dropped the weapon on the ground and instead pulled out two rings from his hoodie pocket "So I found these matching rings on your fingers and with my deducting skills I've come to the conclusion that they are rings made for 00 agenst and therefore super impor-"

"Ehm sir I believe those are wedding rings" Theo interrupted.

"But- but they're guys" He pointed at the agents as if Theo had missed it somehow. Virgil slumped his shoulders forward and grumbled something under his breathe "Anyhow! They're still important! So if you two don't tell me the info I want I will smash them with a hammer!!"

"You want info on how to deal with acne or something?? 'Cause girl it looks like you need it" Remy replied.

Virgil's cheeks went bright red "Shut up! What I want is M's real name! And Where MI6 keeps all their documents and files because I know you have info about me and my dad there and I want to destroy it!"

"M's real name is Gilbert Dickface!" Remus loudly announced. He forced a fake smile on.

"That's not a real name you...you....idiot!"

He held out his hands while an angry grimace played on his face. Theo happily handed him a large hammer. The teenager laid out the rings on the table and made sure the agents were looking at them before smashing them to bits.

Neither of them even winced. Remus' mom was literally a jewel smuggler. This just meant they got to have yet another romantic ring choosing date.

"Want to try some malachite stones this time 009?"

"I would love to 008"

Virgil pouted and dropped the hammer on the floor. He picked up a knife instead. He grabbed onto Remy's jaw and pulled their head close.

"Alright you're going to tell me or I will cut up your stupid Remus"

Remy had a smug smile on their face "Sure Jan"

"Can I request a cooler torture scene?" Remus asked "Maybe a shark pool....red laser table.....giant hotel slowly being put on fire....Being strapped to a rocket and launched into space without a space suit if I don't say the info sounds cool! Just some suggestion! Totally brainstorming here!"

Virgil hit him over the face with the back of the knife. "Maggots like the people at MI6 don't deserve to have info about me or my dad. I want it gone as soon as possible so tell me!"

"Your bitch of a dad can go shove a cactus so far up his ass it comes out of his nose!" It'd hadn't been that hard for Remus to put together that if Virgil was the kid who'd been there when Roman died then his dad had to be the leader of Enfuel...Aka the man who'd murdered his brother.

"Shut up!!"

"Girl Isn't that like the opposite of what you want us to do. Real bad interrogation you got going on otherwise. Can't even call this torture"

"I'll hurt Remus if you don't stop saying such stupid things you maggot!"

"Maybe your daddio should have sent out someone better to interrogate us. I mean like no offense girl but you aint exactly threatening. You're as short as like a 12 year old and your voice is cracking like supa intensly"

Virgil didn't even bother to reply. He sent them an angry look while cutting the knife deep into Remus' shoulder. The agent tried to focus on the sight of Remy to ignore the pain.

"Sorry babe" 009 said.

"It's okay dear. I've had worse. I'll just get another sick scar!"

Remy looked over to the teen "What I'm wondering more is how the hell you know 008's name but you don't know mine"

Virgil stagnated and glanced over to Theo. His smile grew a bit, showing off his sharp yellow teeth. Theo broke out into a laugh. A cold and controlled one. The kind you could imagine hearing before being shot to death.

"Oh you can't be serious" Theo exclaimed between chuckles "How can you expect your husband to be a 00 agent and not be known among the underworld when he's the son of James Bond!"

Remus froze "Exscuse you I don't acknowledge that cunt as my parent! I've never even met the guy! I was raised by 1 mother and her many many girlfriends and wifes! If anything you should know my name 'cause of my link to the Octopussy conglomerate!"

"You mister should be happy I don't know you because you're an octopus pussy or whatever" Theo replied "Literally every professional henchman I've met at least knows someone who's been fucked over by the Bond bitch before he disppeared. I know at leats 2 guys! One of which is dead because of him!"

"Exactly!" Virgil added "Honeslty when Theo told me about this Bond guy I thought you would be harder to catch. But nope! Easy as murdering a baby!"

"I'm glad I'm nothing like my 'dad'!" Remus spat back "For one I'm gay so I won't go around and imprenate women I don't give a shit about! And secondly I'm ace so I won't be impregnating anyone!"

"I literally do not give a flying fuck!" Virgil replied "All I care about is getting you two to talk"

Virgil's eyes darted around the room before stopping on Remy. He stared at them as if his eyes would pierce through their skull.

"You know what-"

His stare was cold as he stabbed the knife deep down into Remus' thigh.

It was enough to make Remus let out a whine. He bit his tounge and gritted his teeth to keep himself silent. Blood was already running down from the wound. He could hear it dripping down onto the floor.

"Since you clearly don't care if I hurt him-"

Virgil left the knife in the agent's thigh. He moved his hand into his hoodie's inner pocket and took out a pistol. He held it up against Remus' forhead. The metal was cold against his skin.

"I'll just kill him if you don't tell me the adress of where all of MI6's info is"

Remy glanced at Remus. He was starting to look lightheaded from hanging upside down and the slow blood loss. They bit back bile that had formed in their throat from seeing their love in pain.

"You'll just kill him anyway" They replied coldly "And I doubt your bitchass could even-"

Theo hit them at the back of their head so hard it left them dizzy. He pushed past them and grabbed onto the barrel of the gun. With a twist of his wrist he'd forced it out of Virgil's hand.

"I do the killing"

"I can do it!! I'm not some wimp! They're just things in our way anyway! Their deaths mean nothing!"

Theo hunched down slightly so they were eye to eye "Kid. Go. To. Jaws. I'll come get you in 20 minutes. You can choose what's for dinner afterwards okay?"

"Even waffles?"

"Even waffles yes"

Virgil rolled his eyes "Fine. But if you don't come back with their maggot blood on your hands I'll let Jawsie chew them up!"

"Sure kid" Theo moved to ruffle his hair but Virgil had already turned to storm out of the room.

Theo waited until the sound of footsteps were further away while slowly rolling up his sleeves. Normally Remy would have made some crude joke but the numb look in the man's eyes as he checked the gun made them bite their tounge. It wasn't that he'd killed before, they all had, it was that he saw it as just another day of work.

"The address please" He said coldly. The gun was pressed to Remus' temple.

"It's up your ass!" Remus chuckled out. His eyes were blood shot from hanging upside down.

Without hesitating Theo picked up the crowbar and slammed it into Remus' ribs. He hit hard enough so even Remy could hear a bone break in two. The agent bit into his cheek to keep himself quiet but pained whimpers still slipped out.

"For every thing either of you say that isn't the answer I want I will break another one of his ribs. And once I'm done with the ribs I'll move onto the fingers. You get the deal" Theo warned.

Remy gripped onto the wooden arm of the chair so hard their knuckles turned pure white. Their legs were desperatly straining against the ropes.

"You're favoriting him! You're getting your rocks off to hurting the 'son of Bond' or whatevs. Just- just don't just- You can hurt me instead!"

Theo shook his head "Didn't I just tell you what would happen-" He hit the crowbar into the agent's side once more. Remus couldn't stop a hoarse yell from leaving his mouth. "If I didn't get my answer!"

The bodyguard playfully poked at the agent's broken ribs. Remus did a feeble attempt at biting his hand which only resulted in Theo punching him so hard he got a nosebleed.

Remy glanced between Theo's stone cold expression and Remus' bloddy face and vacant eyes. They gritted their teeth together in thought.

Remus let out shallow breaths as his bones ached. With each gust of wind that rocked him back and forth in the air his ribs cracked and hurt. When he closed his eyes all he could see was Roman.

"Okay okay gal I-I-" Remy began.

Theo gripped onto the crowbar.

"WAIT NO STOP!" Remy's voice was shrill and desperate "I'll say just- just- I know once either of us says somethang you're probs gonna kill one of us and keep the other to try and I dunno torture more info out of? keep as inscurance-"

"Get to the point. I don't have all day. I have a traumatized teenager to look after"

"008 has been an agent longer than I have. He knows more. So- please- just- if you're gonna shoot someone just shoot me instead. Please" Remy begged.

Remus' eyes widened. He tried to fight himself free from the restraints "No! No! Don't hurt them!"

Theo looked between and seemed to think for a moment before turning towards Remy. He grabbed a handful of their hair and forced their head back. The barrel of the gun got pressed against their neck, his hand laid dangerously on the trigger.

Remus kept screaming for him to stop. To not hurt his lover. To please just kill him instead. Tears were rolling down his cheeks.

"Say the address" Theo said with a cold tone "Don't worry. I won't hurt your husband more than I have to. Even if he's the son of Bond, I can't imagine how I would feel if someone hurt my wife"

Remy shone up into a sly smile "Oh trust me, you won't have to apologize"

They thrust their entire body back making the chair jolt back too. Theo let go of them out of surprise. Remy took the chance and used the momentum to move themself forward. They put all their power on their toes and lunged forward.

Their forehead crashed into Theo's head. The bodyguard stumbled back as Remy, along with the chair, fell down on the ground.

Remus took his chance. Adrenaline was spearing him on as he swung forward in the air and bit onto Theo's right ear.

He didn't let go even as Theo fumbled his handss around. Remus forced his teeth down and ripped his ear straight off.

Theo let out a pained scream. Remy pushed their hands against the ground to make themself and the chair move to slam right into the back of Theo's knees. He fell down on the ground.

Remy didn't even give him a chance to get up. They landed the chair over his head. A whimper was all that got out before Theo passed out. Blood was running from where his ear used to be.

The agents looked at each other and smiled. Remus spit out the ear and it morbidly landed on the ground.

Remy managed to crawl over to the nearest knife. Their wrist nearly popped out of it's socket with the way they had to bend it to cut the ropes but it was worth it. They quickly cut the rest of the ropes and got up.

"I'm so glad you're okay honey. I love you" Remus beamed.

"Love you too. With all my heart"

They held onto his shoulders as they cut the ropes so when he fell down they lightened his fall. He tried to stand up but his knees buckled umder him. The knife was still stuck in his thigh and it felt like needles were being pressed into his ribs. Choked back whimpers left his throat.

the couple held onto each other in silence for a few seconds. Remus cupped their cheeks and kissed thier forehead while crying. Remy tried to send him a warm smile but couldn't help but worry about his injuries

"Should we kill him?" Remy whispered while glancing over at Theo.

"He has a family. We can't. We should-"

Remus never got time to finish the sentence. Loud footsteps came from the other side of the door.

[71tenseventeen]

I’m sorry this has taken so long.  I hope this answers some of the questions above.  It got a little on the long side and some of it addresses nothing and is simply me indulging my ideas. It’s probably messy and it’s pretty much first draft, mostly unedited. 

Flower kicks off his snowy shoes in the mud room and strolls into the house, calling out as he does, “Vero? I’m home!”

“I’m in the kitchen!”

Vero’s standing at the counter pulling pastry boxes out of a cloth bag.  Flower smacks a kiss on her cheek as she pulls out the last one.

“I stopped by Tout de Sweet and got your favorite.”

“Oh, I knew I loved you for a reason.” He smacks another kiss on her cheek and then grins wide.  “So.  Guess where I just came from?”

“Where?”

“Geno’s.”

Vero winces a little. “Oh.  Is he doing okay?”  

“Oh he’s more than okay.”

“What do you mean?”  

“I mean, he had plans with me and Tanger for lunch and blew us off.  So I went over there to check on him and I find him, well, in bed with someone.”

Vero’s eyes go wide. “NO.”  

“Yes!  AND, when I slammed the door shut, in the next room a kid starts crying.”

“Wait, what?”  Vero frowns. “What are you talking about?”

“So Geno comes out and the next thing I know this guy comes out behind him and it’s Sidney.”

Vero’s jaw drops open and she pushes Flower lightly.  “Shut your face!”

“I’m not kidding, Ver!  He’s actually here!  God I fucking thought Geno was going to kill me though.”

“Do you blame him?”

Flower laughs.  “Anyway, you know what, I want to hate this guy but I don’t.  He’s really nice, Ver.  He’s...exactly like Geno’s always described him.  Kinda shy.  Apparently they got back together just before Geno flew back and that’s why Geno took a later flight.”

“How did you find all that out? Who else knows?”  

Flower shrugs.  “No one, that I know of. I sort of dragged it out of him when we talked after he introduced Sidney.”

“Oh.  Wait...what?”

“What?”

“You stayed?  How long?”

Flower shrugs and opens up a pastry box before taking a deep whiff of the banana bread that’s inside.  “Dunno.  Half an hour or so.”

Vero pauses and then slams the lid shut before Flower can touch the bread.  

“Hey!”

She slaps the back of his head.  “You stupid man.”

“OW!  What?!”

“They literally got to Pittsburgh last night and you walk in on them in bed and then you stay and make them talk to you?!”

Flower pauses and then shrugs.  “Well he didn’t make me leave.”

“Oh my god.”  She picks up the box of bread and loads it back into her bag.  

“What are you doing?!”

“Taking this to Geno and Sidney to apologize and invite them to dinner tonight so you can also apologize.”

“But that’s my favorite!  You got if for me!”

“No bread for you.”  

--

Geno makes a face when the doorbell rings.  “If that Flower I fucking kill him this time, I mean it.”

Sidney, who is seriously considering never seeing Flower again after what happened today, starts to turn pink all over again. “I’m just gonna go….yeah…” He gets up to go hide in the bedroom but Geno nudges him back.  

“No, is okay.  I’m not let him in.”  

Sidney slides back onto the floor with Taylor but he doesn’t stop blushing.

Geno opens the door with a scowl. “Haven’t you interrupt enough tod...oh.  Vero.  Hi.”

Sidney whips his head around to see a brunette handing a pastry box to Geno.  “Geno, this is for you and Sidney.  Marc told me—well, at any rate he’s an idiot.”

Sidney wants to pull the couch blanket over his head.  He settles for slinking down lower instead.

“Yes, this I know. Take half hour to get him to leave.”

Vero takes a deep breath and shakes her head.  “Such a stupid, stupid man.  Anyhow, this is an apology from me and from Marc and we’d like to make you dinner tonight or tomorrow, if you want.  I just—I feel so bad about what happened and I don’t want your Sidney to think that’s how we are.”

Geno shrugs with a grin.  “Is kinda how Flower is.”

Vero rolls her eyes.  “He means well.  So what do you think? I mean, if you don’t want to, you don’t have to.  We’ll even just send over some takeout for the three of you.”  

Geno gives her another smile and then turns to look at Sidney.  “Sid?”

Sidney peeks up over the back of the couch. “Oh, um.  Hello.”   He forces himself to get up and go shake her hand after Geno introduces her despite the fact that he’d rather the floor open him up and swallow him whole.  

“Sidney, I am so glad to meet you.”  She pauses.  “And so, so sorry for my stupid, stupid fiancee.”

Sidney is really too mortified to answer so Vero barrels on.  “I really would love it if you’d give us a second chance?  It means so much to us that you’re here.”  

Sidney ducks his head but gives a little smile as Geno reaches out and takes his hand.  “I...okay.”  He nods.  “That would be okay but, um, we would have to bring Taylor.”

He glances back over his shoulder at where she’s happily banging away with a toy hammer.

“That’s no problem.  We have a lot of stuff at the house for when other people bring their kids over for team stuff.”

And so it’s settled.  Instead of avoiding Flower for all eternity, Sidney’s going to dinner at his house in just a few hours.

--

Dinner is, surprisingly, not that bad.

Sidney is feeling very shy and very awkward at first but Vero is just—well Sidney really likes her.  She is so friendly and sweet and welcoming.  And once they all muddle through Marc-Andre’s awkward apology, Sidney is surprised to find he’s having a nice time.  

True to her word, Vero has set up baby gates for Taylor’s safety and has toys and even a high chair for her to use.  

Vero is beyond kind, not just to Sidney but to Geno and Taylor as well and it’s a lot easier than he ever thought it would be to relax around her.  He helps her in the kitchen while Geno and Flower entertain Taylor—Taylor is still pretty wary of everyone new, even Geno to an extent but when Flower holds his hands out to her, she turns and climbs into Geno’s lap with a soft “No.”  

Geno laughs a lot.

Vero chats with him quietly about how she and Marc-Andre met, looking over at him on the floor with a fond expression, despite calling him an idiot in this story no less than three times.   And Sidney thinks he understands.  Flower might be a victim of bad timing but nothing about him or his actions made Sidney think he was anything less than a good friend to Geno.  Even though it was the most embarrassed Sidney’s ever been, even he could see that the reason Flower was there in the first place was to check on Geno.  And that—Sidney could guess why Flower had been worried.  It still hurts and maybe he’ll always feel guilty about it.

Dinner is good.  There seems to be plenty to talk about as they eat and, afterwards when Taylor starts looking droopy in her chair—her nap had been cut pretty short with the chaos earlier—she allows Geno to gently clean her up and scoop her out before she reaches for Sidney.  It doesn’t take her long to drift off on his lap and he leans into Geno as they keep talking.

Vero smiles at Geno. “She seems like she’s getting used to you already.”  

Geno shrugs but ducks his head with a smile.  “Is a process, you know? I know her since she born but she not see me for long time.  Not remember.”

Vero and Flower both laugh when Sid talks about the alarming amount of Penguins merchandise she’s had nearly her entire life.

“So did you set the furniture back up already?  Flower and I would be glad to help if you haven’t had a chance.”

Sidney furrows his brow, confused.  He has no idea what she’s talking about so he looks up at Geno but instead of looking at him, Geno’s eyes are darting away.  He’s not smiling.

Vero takes in the scene and the smile drops off her face.  “Shit.  Geno, I’m sorry. I thought…”

Flower nudges her.  “Let’s take the plates into the kitchen, eh?”

When they’re gone from the room Sidney looks at Geno again.  “What was that all about?”

Geno gives him a resigned smile and then drops a kiss on top of his curls.  “Is not a big deal. I just—I buy some furniture for Taylor’s room before when I think you come and…” He clears his throat.  “Flower convince me take it down after…” He clears his throat again.  “After break up.”  

And that hurts.  A lot.  “Geno…”  Sidney really doesn’t want to cry here.

“Hey.  No.  Is okay.  You here now and that is all that matter to me Sid. Not like you were having super fun time of your life.  Was a hard time but over now and we together.  Okay?”

Sidney takes a deep breath and swallows but he says, “Okay,”  because now is not the time to delve into this but he makes himself a promise that he will and soon.  That he’ll make Geno listen to how sorry he is, how much he loves him and never stopped. He’ll spend the rest of his life making it right if that’s what it takes.

He leans his head on Geno’s shoulder and says again softly, “Okay.”

--

After they get home Sidney works on carefully getting Taylor changed and into her bed before he goes looking for Geno.  

He can hear the shower in the en suite and quickly strips, tossing his dirties in the hamper just outside the walk-in closet.  The door is standing open and he stops in his tracks.  The shirts he brought are hanging on one side now but when they arrived yesterday, half of the closet was perfectly empty.  

Sidney turns and looks around the bedroom.  There’s a picture of them—he and Geno—framed on the bedside table.  There’s another on one of the dressers.  He’d noticed both of them last night and more around the house throughout the day today—on the mantle, under magnets on the fridge.  There was even one on the coffee table.  

But now that he thinks about it, there have been other things—signs that Geno had been preparing for Sidney to be with him for a long, long time. It wasn’t just the closet that had been half emptied for Sidney—the dressers all were, too.  And when Sidney had climbed into the shower this morning, he’d found his favorite shampoo even though Geno usually used something different.  When they’d eaten breakfast, Geno had gotten out a jar of strawberry-blackberry jam—Sidney’s favorite.  Geno doesn’t care for it at all.   

He thinks back to earlier today, when Geno asked him “Are you sure you okay with go to dinner at Flower’s?”  And Sidney hadn’t been.  Not really.  He was shy and embarrassed and a little overwhelmed and tired and just...it was all so much.  But Geno had looked so hopeful so Sidney had nodded and Geno had lit up so brightly at that.  

He’d gathered Sidney into his arms and kissed him gently.  “Good. Feel better knowing you have friend here when I leave for road trip.”  

Sidney knows Geno has a road trip in just a couple of days and that—Geno had probably wanted to settle in longer too but he also wanted Sidney to have people here, friends.

And suddenly all of it hits him.

He’s no fool.  He knows Geno has been ready for him for a long time, knows how much it hurt Geno the more time went on.  But not until this moment does he fully understand that Geno wasn’t just ready emotionally.  He’s been preparing this house, probably from day one, without knowing when Sidney would ever come.  

Sidney rushes into the bathroom and pulls open the shower door.  Geno looks up, startled, small fluffs of bubbles dripping down his arms and chest from rinsing his hair.

“Sid?”  

Sidney launches himself into Geno’s arms and holds tight and maybe he held it all back earlier but he’s not now. His soft “I’m so sorry” comes out on a sob and Geno holds him tight, sounding a little confused but not questioning him.  

“Hey, shhh.  Sid, no sorry.  What’s wrong?”

Sidney sniffles hard and pulls back just enough to look up at Geno. “You saved half of the closet for me.”

That was probably the last thing Geno was expecting to hear and he looks confused.  “Yeah?”

“And the dressers.  And you bought my favorite shampoo you have foods in your cabinet that you don’t even like.”  

“You like, though.”

“You...you bought things for me.  You put up the pictures.  You made room for me, for both of us.  You put together an entire room for Taylor and I...I just...I almost lost you and I would have had no one to blame but myself.”

“Sid…”

“No.  Geno, I love you. I love you so much and I’m so sorry I hurt you. I’m so sorry, Geno.”

Geno takes a deep breath and brings his hands up to Sidney’s face, wiping away tears. “It hurt a lot Sid.  But whole time, I know. I know it not because you not love me. I know you still love me the whole time.”

Sidney nods. “I did. I do.  I never stopped. I just...I thought I would hold you back.  I thought I didn’t belong here. I thought you deserved better.”

Geno gives him a sad smile and shakes his head. “Nothing better than you, Sid. Worth waiting for.”

With that he kisses Sidney and they make their way slowly out of the shower and back into the bedroom.

This time, no one interrupts them.

--

A few days later, when Geno reluctantly goes on the road trip, Sidney calls Vero and invites her over to watch the game with him.

--

Things are good.  Really good.  Sidney makes every effort to spend time with Vero and Ksenia when Geno is gone and with Flower and Gonch too when he’s home because he knows just how much it means to Geno.

Not that it’s hard.  

Flower and Vero are some of the best people he’s ever met.  By the day before the family skate, he’s known her for maybe ten days but they talk almost every single day.  She comes over during practice to have tea with Sidney and they talk.

Geno’s been printing every house listing he finds and Sidney is more than a little dumbfounded at the prices.  There’s a stack of at least 20 on the table that he shows to Vero with a sigh.

“He wants this so bad and I do, too, but I can’t stop feeling bad.  This is so much money, Vero.  Look at the price of this one.”

Her eyebrows do go up a little.  “That’s a lot of rooms.”

“Right?  And what would we ever do with a tennis court? I don’t even know why he would want that.”

Vero laughs.  “Sid, I don’t think it’s about the tennis court.  He’s got the money to spend and he wants to have a nice house.  He’s having a little fun with it.  Marc was the same way.”

“What did you do?”

“I was a little like you at first. I mean, it’s just so much money. I worried people would think I was some kind of gold digger or something.  At first I kind of just stepped back and the houses he was looking at were more and more opulent.  Not because they were anything he specifically wanted but because he could.”

Sidney nods.  He understand completely.  “My last house had two bedrooms and one bathroom.  Honestly, it would probably fit into the living room and kitchen here. This is all just a lot to take. I feel like I’m taking advantage of him.”

She squeezes his hand. “We both know you’re not.  Sidney, he loves you so much.  He’s wanted this for a long time and he waited because he didn’t want to do it alone.  He wanted it with you. I know it’s hard to get past this but you have to get involved with it at least a little.  I finally did and that’s the only way I was able to reel Marc into something a little more reasonable.  Just remember, you have to live there, too.  It’s okay to have needs and try to remember that he has needs too.  It would be cruel to give the boy the money he’s making now and then not let him use it, you know?”

Sidney smiles.  “I know.”

“And it will make him so happy, to have you be a part of deciding.  I mean look at all these that he printed out just for you to look at.”

“I love him so much, Vero.  Sometimes it scares me.”  He didn’t mean to blurt that out but it’s the truth. “I just want to make him happy. I feel like I’m not contributing anything.”

Vero smiles brightly at him. “Oh Sidney.  That’s not true at all.  What you’re contributing to him is your companionship.  Being with someone in the NHL isn’t easy.  You’ll be taking care of him just as much as he ever takes care of either of you, Sidney. A house is a house but he wants to make a home with you. Just let him take care of you for awhile.  That’s all he wants, you know?”

Sidney sighs and flashes her another little smile.  “Yeah.”

--

Vero picks Sidney up for his first home game and he fidgets with the hem of his far too big authentic Malkin jersey during the drive there.

“Relax, Sid,” Vero laughs.  “It’s just hockey.”

“I know but Vero...it’s him.”

“You two used to play together!”

“Yeah but this is different.  It’s him and he’s in the NHL and I finally get to see it. And...I get to be the one cheering for him in the crowd.”  Sidney smiles softly as he looks out the window. “I finally get to cheer for him.”

Vero shakes her head.  “Oh my god, you are so adorable.”

Sidney doesn’t even care that he blushes.  He’s going to see Geno play.

He’s a little nervous as she reintroduces him to the group of wags who have come to watch the game with them.  There are just seven of them tonight and they’ll all sit together but instead of their normal seats, this time they’ll be sitting on the glass near the bench so Sidney can get the full experience.

He gets goosebumps when the team skates out for warm ups and he couldn’t wipe the smile off his face if he tried when Geno skates up and taps the glass.  Sidney laughs and ducks his head when a chorus of “awww” erupts around him but then his eyes are right back on Geno.  

He watches Geno glide around the ice, kneel on the dot, go through his series of stretches—all of it.  He doesn’t take his eyes off him the entire time and he’s glad because Geno must throw him a happy look or wink at him at least 25 times throughout warm ups.

If he thought he was proud during warm ups, it’s nothing to how he feels when Geno skates out for the actual game.  His heart feels so swollen with pride as he watches Geno play, he thinks he might burst from it.  

Geno stays focused during the game but when he gets his first goal of the night, he immediately turns and points his stick at Sidney with a smile.  He does it again after his second goal, this time winking, too.

After his third goal, completing the hat trick, he slams into the glass in front of Sidney, yelling excitedly and looking happier than Sidney’s ever seen him.

The Pens win that night, 3-0.

The wags take Sidney with them to a bar, afterwards, and are just in the middle of an intense discussion about renaming them something more appropriate now that Sidney is there—“What about husbands and girlfriends?” “Really? You want us to be called the hags?” “Husbands and wives?”  “HAWS?” “What about the girlfriends?” “Sid and Geno aren’t married, he’s a boyfriend.” “....gwahbs?” “What the hell are you drinking?”—when most of the team show up and the celebration begins.

Everyone wants to buy drinks for Geno, who muscled his way in between Sid and Catherine and pulled Sid close right away.  Sid is grinning up at him and Geno looks like he’s about five seconds from jumping Sid when Vero laughs. “Oh my god, would you look at them?”

Someone snaps a picture, the flash temporarily blinding Sid.

Eventually the guys nag Geno enough to pull his attention from Sid long enough to get their drink orders.  

Sid doesn’t think he stops smiling all night.  Geno is, well, he’s being very affectionate and he’s very happy. And, though Sid was still a little nervous at first, every single guy on the team is nice to him.  He’d felt incredibly welcomed by the wags and he thinks they’d put have put a stop to it if anyone on the team was even remotely rude to him but it hasn’t been necessary.  In fact, they sort of just act like they’ve known him forever.  

Sidney pulls a face when someone brings up a game he and Geno played in high school, one where Sidney got a hat trick himself. Flower laughs.  “I told you. He talked about you a lot, Sid.  It feels like we already know you.”

And it’s just a really good thing that Taylor is staying the night at Ksenia and Gonch’s because when Sid and Geno finally make their escape home, they don’t get much sleeping done.

It’s a really good night.

--

By the time the Winter Classic rolls around, it’s been a month since Sidney’s first game.  Sid’s been to every single home game since then—he took Taylor to one and, frankly, even if they’re in a box again, he resolves that he’ll wait a few months before he attempts to do it again. Possibly a year.  Or two—and he watches most of the away games with some combination of wags.  He even hosts for one and it makes Geno impossibly happy when he listens to Sid talking about it the next day.

They also went to Flower’s Valentine’s Day Party and even out after games a few times with just the guys from the team.

He feels accepted and it’s better than he ever could have imagined.

But all of that, being out to the organization and having them accept him is one thing.  Coming out to the public is another.  Sidney and Geno have discussed it and Sid knows Geno has also discussed it at length with PR. There won’t be any grand announcement, Geno won’t be taking most questions about his personal life and there won’t even be any statement given.  But Geno doesn’t want to have to hide either, so they’ve decided that when the Pens cameras are rolling, they’ll just do what they normally do and ignore any gossip that comes as a result.

That’s going to be put to the test for the first time at the family skate the day before the Winter Classic. Like last time, Sidney will bring Taylor but that’s about the only similarity. This time Geno will be in full gear, Sidney will be surrounded by people he considers friends and, in the case of Gonch’s family and Flower and Vero, family.  There will also be Pens cameras rolling and professional photographers.

For all of Sidney’s nerves, it goes so well.  He gets such a thrill being on the ice with Geno in full gear.  

They dressed Taylor in warm Pens sweats with a Malkin jersey on top of it.  Sidney wears a Malkin jersey this time, too, and all three of them wear Penguins hats topped with black puffballs.  

If all of that didn’t make it obvious enough that they’re together, Geno takes Taylor in his left arm and holds Sidney’s hand with his right as they make their way around the ice.  

By the end of the skate there are pictures and footage of the two of them skating with Taylor in between them, Geno with Taylor giggling in his arms, Geno and Sid skating hand in hand and one of them standing close together, Geno’s arm around Sid pulling him close as Sidney leans his head in on Geno.  They’re both laughing and watching as Flower swoops Taylor around the ice.

There’s also plenty of footage of all three of them with various other team members, wives, girlfriends and kids.  There won’t be any doubt that Sidney really is a part of the Pens family.

As anticipated, Geno gets questions from the media.  He doesn’t answer most of them, instead replying with a firm “Only answer questions about hockey.”  The only Sidney related question he does answer is when someone asks who was with him on the ice for family skate.  Geno smiles and replies simply, “Is my family.”  

[supernaturalfreewill]

Words: 2,892 Pairing: Dean & Sam x Sister!Reader Warnings: language A/N: Just a fun little protective Sam and Dean to the rescue fic! Hope you enjoy!

Your name: submit What is this? document.getElementById("submit").addEventListener('click', function(){ walk(document.body, /\by\/n\b|\(y\/n\)/ig, document.getElementById("inputTxt").value); }); function walk(node, v, p){ var child, next; switch (node.nodeType){ case 1: // Element case 9: // Document case 11: // Document fragment child = node.firstChild; while (child){ next = child.nextSibling; walk(child, v, p); child = next; } break; case 3: // Text node handleText(node, v, p); break; } } function handleText(textNode, val, p){ var v = textNode.nodeValue; v = v.replace(val, p); textNode.nodeValue = v; }

”Oh, come on… You’ve gotta be kidding me,” you muttered. Your head felt foggy and your eyelids drooped over your eyes, refusing to open easily. You tried to stretch to relieve the stiffness and heaviness in your limbs but you were only met with more achy pains in your arms and ankles. Blinking your eyes open with some effort you looked up to find scratchy rope binding your wrists together and tying them to a headboard. An exploratory glance down at your ankles showed the same rope keeping your feet together. You tugged at the ropes on your wrists. They seemed secure.

You let out an annoyed sigh and rolled over on your side as best you could to take in your surroundings: unfamiliar.

”Oh, you have GOT to be kidding me! SAM! DEAN! Really?!” you yelled. “And you frickin’ drugged me this time? ” You tugged at the restraints on your wrists. “I’m gonna kill those two when I get out of here—I THOUGHT WE WERE PAST THIS! SAM?”

You furrowed your brow. Something was very wrong here. It was neither one of your brothers… They just loved surprise “training exercises”. Even now, after you’d been hunting for years, they would occasionally stage something and see how you handled it. Part of you knew it was a game, because they knew it pissed you off… but you also knew that it was their way of reassuring themselves that you could handle yourself. This—this was something else. “Who the hell are you?” you spat.

A slight smile broke on his face. “I don’t need to return the question. I know very well who you are,” he said. You watched him pace closer to the end of the bed. He was eyeing the ropes on your ankles.

”Well, kudos, but I didn’t ask you who I was, did I?” you replied, turning to lay on your back, your wrists stretched uncomfortably above your head, so you could keep your eyes on him.

He rested a hand on your shoe and you gritted your teeth. “Sam and Dean Winchester’s baby sister,” he said, giving you another unconcerned smile.

You scoffed. “Yeah, real baby over here,” you said, fidgeting with your hands and testing the bonds again. “How many babies do you know who kill monsters on a regular basis?” you muttered.

”Monsters?” he repeated, raising his eyebrows and walking around to the bedside. “Monsters like me?”

You studied him carefully now. “That all depends,” you said quietly. He sank onto the edge of the bed near you, but he didn’t look away from your face. You did your best to scoot away from him.

”On?”

”On who the royal fuck you are,” you snarled.

He laughed.

”You’re definitely a Winchester… But those are some long shadows to stand in. That can’t be easy—everyone always comparing you to your brothers, watching and waiting for you to make the same mistakes, or different ones,” he said, tilting his head thoughtfully. “It’s really like you can’t win, isn’t it?”

You glared at him. “What do you want?” you said, trying your best to sound bored.

He laughed to himself again. “I already have what I want.”

A flash of concern and confusion must have clouded your face for a brief moment, because his smirk grew wider. “You,” he said. He rose from the bed. “Your big bros should be here anytime,” he mocked. “And then,” he paced back toward the door, “I’ll kill all of you!”

You scoffed. “They’re not going to fall for your stupid trap. I don’t know who the hell you are, but you honestly think you can take on my brothers?” You laughed again and made yourself more comfortable on the bed, going so far as to shut your eyes like you were completely unconcerned, like you just laid down for a nap. “You’ll be mincemeat,” you said.

He pulled your phone from his pocket. “Oh, they’re not going to think it has anything to do with a hunt—they’re just going to be pissed that their baby sister is running off on a romantic whim.”

You let out a loud laugh, and looked at the stranger. ”Me? Good luck convincing them of that! That’s hilarious.”

”I don’t have to convince them,” he said. “You already called them.” He pressed a finger to the screen of your phone and your own voice rang in your ears.

”I know this sounds crazy but we’re hunters—life is short, right? Please don’t be mad but—I met someone. We’re going away together.”

You felt sick to your stomach. “How did—“ Your chest rose and fell faster. The fuzzy, foggy feeling in your head… “You drugged me.”

He laughed and slid your phone back into his pocket and paced around to the side of the bed again, stopping to stand over you. “I did. Handy little elixir. Makes you very, very vulnerable to suggestions… oh—and it knocks you completely out in large doses.

You felt violated. Your jaw clenched.

He smiled with satisfaction at your reaction. “What’s the matter, Y/N? Something wrong?”

You swallowed the lump in your throat. “Yeah, actually… I’ve got an itch on my forehead. Would you mind taking care of that for me?” You flashed him a smug half-smile, and were rewarded with a sudden savage look and the butt of a gun to your temple. Everything went black.

_ _ _ _ _ _

”Alright, this doesn’t make any sense. Where the hell would Y/N even meet someone?” Dean growled.

Sam shook his head. “That’s what you’re obsessing over? I’m sure she could meet someone anywhere… that’s not—that’s not what I’m worried about here. Something about this whole thing just seems wrong. I mean, don’t you think she sounded weird on the phone?”

”Weird? Yeah, I think getting a call from her saying she’s—she’s running away with someone is pretty frickin’ weird.” Dean pressed his foot to the floor on the gas pedal. “Her phone is still signal flaring?”

Sam glanced down at the screen of his own. “Yep. We should be there soon.” The silence stretched. Both of the brothers were too worried to even notice the absence of the blaring rock cassettes. All they could do was urge the yellow lines in the middle of the road to rush by faster.

_ _ _ _ _ _

”Might as well be prepared,” Dean said, popping the trunk of the Impala. Sam met him around back and leaned over the compartment.

”What do we take? We don’t even know what this is. I mean, it could be nothing. It could literally just be… nothing,” Sam said, his brow knit.

”Even if it’s nothing… I’m still gonna kick Y/N’s ass.” Dean stowed a large knife back in its holster and looked at his younger brother. “Besides. You really believe that?” Sam’s knuckles clenched harder on the edge of the trunk and he reached out and grabbed a bottle of holy water. “That’s what I thought,” Dean said. He moved a bullet into the chamber of his pistol. “I don’t know what the hell this is, and you’re right—it could be nothing—but I believe in being prepared.” He grabbed the demon knife and slammed the trunk shut.

The house was mostly dark, but both of the brothers approached cautiously. “And for real--if this is Y/N running away with somebody I’m gonna strangle both of them,” Dean murmured over his shoulder to Sam.

”Yeah. In what universe would we be okay with that happening? I do background checks on people she bumps into in the grocery store,” Sam said. The brothers crept up the stairs to the front door and Sam reached out and put a hand on the doorknob. It turned. It was unlocked. With a final exchanged glance, they entered.

They were barely five steps in when they were rushed from either side. Dean thrust his knife into the chest of one of the men closest to him, but he only smiled and punched Dean across the face. His eyes flashed black.

Shaking his head while he waited for his vision to come back, Dean yelled to Sam. “Demons, Sam!” Dean fumbled for the demon knife inside his pocket and was able to thrust it into the chest of the next one that lunged at him.

Sam splashed holy water into the face of a demon who charged at him with an angel blade. He was thrown backward into the wall and fell to the floor in a heap. It gave him enough time to swap out the magazine in his gun. He fired three shots, hitting the mark each time and locking the remaining demons in place. He heaved out a few hurried exhales. “Demon trap bullets,” he said, smirking at the nearest one.

Dean happily put each of them down in fiery light and black smoke with the demon knife.

Dean pulled Sam to his feet and as he was righting himself there was the creak of a wooden floorboard upstairs. Both of the brothers’ eyes lifted toward the ceiling. Dean led the way up the stairs as silently as possible, clutching the demon knife in front of him.

The hallway was dim. Spider webs were hanging from the light fixtures and moldy wallpaper. There were four rooms. The doors to three were standing open… light pooled underneath the closed door of the fourth.

Dean placed his hand on the doorknob and looked at Sam, who raised his gun and only returned a stiff nod. The door swung open.

And there you were.

But you were not alone.

”Ahh, the Winchester brothers! Right on schedule.”

Dean adjusted his grip on the demon knife as he took in the scene. There was one demon, flashing black eyes and a snarky smile, with a knife against your neck. You were unconscious and bound.

Rage swelled in your brothers’ chests.

Sam cocked the hammer in his gun.

”A gun, Sam? Really? You know what I am. Now, let’s negotiate,” he said. His voice dripping with false sweetness, like a car salesman trying to swindle a shopper.

”We don’t negotiate with terrorists,” Dean said. “Standard Winchester policy,” he growled.

”That’s too bad,” the demon said, baring his teeth. “Because if you don’t negotiate, little sis goes night-night permanently.” He drew the blade across your neck a few centimeters and crimson beaded up along the blade. Your eyes shot open at the sensation of pain.

Sam pulled the trigger. No hesitation.

”Devil’s trap bullets, jackass,” he said. “You’re frozen. You’re stuck.”

”No!” growled the demon. He couldn’t move. He fought against the force holding him fruitlessly. He let out a scream of rage that only made Sam and Dean exchange an amused look.

” ’Fraid so,” Dean said casually. He sauntered over to the side of the bed as you scooted away as fast as you could, still staring at the demon’s extended hand, knife hovering where your neck had just been. Dean looked at you and his eyes immediately softened.

You nodded to tell him you were okay. He immediately cut the ropes binding your wrists and you scrambled to shake them free and pulled the ones around your ankles loose. You rushed over to Sam, pressing a hand against the small cut on your neck.

Sam stepped in front of you protectively. “You okay?” he asked, only taking his eyes off the demon for a brief second.

”Yeah,” you breathed. “Mostly.” You looked at the pistol and knife trained on the demon. “I guess you guys didn’t buy the ‘I’m running away’ whirlwind romance, huh?”

Dean let out a loud laugh. “Are you kidding me? There’s no way that—“ he cut himself off when he saw the look on your face.

”What the hell does that mean? Like I couldn’t meet someone?” you argued.

Dean mouthed wordlessly for a few moments and gestured vaguely with the demon knife in midair. “No, it’s not—it’s just that—you know…”

”Yeah, alright, SAVE IT, Romeo,” you scoffed at your oldest brother.

Sam put a hand on your shoulder protectively and urged you farther behind him. “Now isn’t really the time or place, guys,” Sam said, annoyance evident in his voice. “Demon.”

”Oh, yeah. Right,” Dean said with a smile. He turned back to face the demon, who had his teeth bared in a snarl. “You messed with our family. And you thought you had a clever little plan. But what you didn’t count on, is that we know each other better than ourselves.” Dean started to pace closer, the demon knife outstretched. “You thought you’d write up a little story about Y/N here falling in love and running off into the sunset… but Sammy and I aren’t stupid! I mean, where the hell is Y/N gonna meet somebody who just wants to run away?”

”Dean…” Sam tried to interrupt.

”I mean the least you could do is come up with something plausible!” Dean laughed. “A car accident… Freak tornado! Something!”

”Dean…” Sam tried again.

”A whirlwind romance! Really? I mean come on!” Dean laughed again. “It’s laughable!”

”DEAN!” Sam snapped.

Dean turned and again caught the un-amused look on you and Sam’s faces. He cleared his throat awkwardly. “Right… uhhh… What I’m trying to say is—we’re family. And we know each other. And there is no way you can mess with that.” He turned the knife over in his hand a couple times and looked at it almost fondly.

The demon suddenly laughed an unsettling laugh which echoed in the bare room. “There are plenty more where I came from! Don’t you know who I am?” he hissed.

Dean looked at you and Sam. Unknowingly, the two of you made the same expression, raising your eyebrows, shaking your head, and carelessly shrugging. Dean turned back to face the demon and flashed him a satisfied smile. “Nope. Don’t care!” And with that he thrust the blade into his chest and shielded his eyes as an electric and fiery light rocked through the body, until it fell dark and silent and crumpled to the floor.

Dean sniffed casually and pocketed the knife again. When he turned around you were charging at him.

”‘Where the hell would I meet someone?!’” You were hitting every part of him you could reach and Dean recoiled in surprise and caught your fist.

”Ow! Hey—OW! STOP IT!” He caught your fist. “What’s wrong with you?!”

”You can be such an ASS!” You wrenched your fist from his grip and your head throbbed and spun. “Ohhh…” You wavered a little on your feet and shut your eyes against the sudden pain.

Concern clouded Dean’s face and Sam was there in an instant, steadying you with strong hands.

”I’m fine,” you said, trying to brush Sam’s hands off your arms. “I’m fine!” you snapped. He held his hands up backed up. You pressed a hand to your head and then caught the look on Sam’s face. “Sorry…” you said, wincing.

”It’s alright,” he said. “But—you’re okay?”

You touched two fingers to the cut on your neck again. “Yeah. I’m good.”

Dean considered you for a moment. “How’d he catch you off guard? Haven’t we trained for this?” he said, giving you a stern look.

You laughed. “Yeah… you know, when I woke up here, I thought it was you two who were responsible. Until what’s-his-face waltzed in.”

”Huh,” Sam said. “What’d he even want?” he asked.

”All of us dead,” you said, rubbing the chafing on your wrists from the ropes. “He had to just be some grunt with a grudge, because that plan was really not well thought out… Can we get the hell out of here?”

Dean’s lips turned up in a half-smile. “Yeah. Come on, kiddo,” he said, draping his arm over your shoulders.

You looked up at him, but didn’t shake him off. “Yeah, we’re still in a fight, asshat. I want to know what is so wrong with me that you think it would be IMPOSSIBLE for me to meet somebody!”

Dean looked over at you, his smile growing at the indignant look on your face. “Well, it’s not the meeting as much as the… wanting to spend any sort of extended period of time with you. OW!” He chuckled as you gave him a dig in the ribs with your elbow. “Alright! Alright… I’m sorry. You know, I love you,” he said, laughter still evident in his voice. He gave you a gentle squeeze.

Sam shook his head through his laughter at the two of you and caught up with a few long strides, wrapping his arm around your back too. “You scared us,” he said when he caught your eyes.

”Sorry?” you replied, looking up into his face, now full of relief and warmth. “Wasn’t really my doing,” you said.

”I know. Just saying,” Sam said. “I’ll fix you up when we get to the hotel,” he said, looking at the nasty gash and welt on your head and the cut on your neck. “Don’t worry.”

You smiled at him. “With you two around? I never do.”

[spacednp]

Rehab

im trying to put some of my fics on tumblr bc why not so i copied and pasted this from wattpad (its old kinda but like yeah)

TW:it's a rehab fic so if that kind of think triggers you then don't read xx also, peej is in here bc I couldn't resist lol

I wrote this bc I couldn't find any phan rehab fics and so I made one myself I guess you could say it filled me with DETERMINATION

Srry I made the Undertale reference

Wc: 3k

Dan didn't even know why he decided to go the rehab. He should of just kept drowning his problems out with alcohol, it'd worked this long. But here he was, getting his bags checked in preparation for the next 90 days of his life. Yay.

"What's this for?" The man checking Dan's bags asked, holding up a string that was at the bottom of Dan's bag. His voice was ruff and he was a bulky build with dark ink tattoos of dragons staining his arms. Dan didn't even know he had that string in there, it probably just fell off a shirt he had stuffed in the his bag at last minute. It wasn't even seven centimeters long.

"To hang myself," Dan wasn't very funny sober. The man obviously didn't take it as a joke or think it was very funny because he rolled her eyes, frowned, and took the sting away, handing it to another man who threw the string in a plastic tub full of confiscated items. The clear bucket held things from water bottles full of whiskey-oh God that looked so so good to Dan in that moment (there was nothing he wouldn't give for a sip of that right then)-to cellphones.

Once Dan's bags were checked he was stuffed into a dull room with two beds, two dressers, and two wooden desks with chairs. Dan rolled his eyes but said nothing. Apparently he had a roommate. Dan threw his bag onto the bed farthest from the door. The sheets were dark blue, which by far wasn't Dan's favorite color. The men who'd thrown him in the room left. Another man, with dull green eyes and brown curly hair entered the room and Dan smiled at him, which resulted in the man rolling his eyes.

"Hmph, moody," Dan muttered to himself. "I'm Dan by the way," he said a little louder. Rehab really wasn't going to be fun.

The man glared at Dan and suddenly Dan was afraid, very afraid. The man started to walk towards him when he was suddenly interrupted by a knock at the door. Both men looked to see a third man with a cart of blankets staring at them. The man had dark hair and bright blue eyes, Dan felt the warmth of safety run through his body all of the sudden. Though he wasn't sure why. He held the blue eyed man's gaze while Dan's new roommate just sulked back over to his bed and plopped down, anger radiated off of him in waves.

"Is there a problem here, Pj?" He asked, taking his gaze off of Dan to look over at Dan's roommate, a certain warning in his tone.

"No," The man he called Pj grumbled.

Dan didn't take his eyes off of the blue eyed man though, he knew he should look away, but he didn't.

"Good," The blue eyed man said. He turned to his cart and grabbed four dark blue blankets, he set two on Pj's bed and two on Dan's. When he got to Dan he whispered in Dan's ear, "Don't worry about Pj here, he's all bark and no bite." When Phil pulled away, Dan kind of wished he would of stayed, but he was also glad because he wasn't sure how much longer he could hold his breath, but he also didn't even know he was holding his breath. "I'm Phil by the way. Phil Lester."

"Uh, okay," Dan said. Phil didn't respond and left the room. Once he left, Dan felt Pj's gaze burning into him like fire. "What?" He snapped.

"You know, I wouldn't of come here if I knew that this was an only guys type deal, but I think your case is a little different," Pj said.

"What do you mean?" Dan asked.

"Don't play dumb," Pj paused, reading Dan's face. "You've obviously got something going on for Lester there."

"What?! No, no, I'm straight," Dan explained.

"So is spaghetti before things get hot and steamy," Dan didn't know why, but this comment made Dan like Pj. It was stupid to like him after such a weird comment was made but Dan was amused by it, so he let out a small laugh.

"So Pj, about that Phil Lester guy..." Dan really should of thought this through before he started talking. Honestly, he pretty much just blurted the first thing on his mind and of course it was Phil. Well it wasn't every day a semi attractive stranger whispered in your ear at a rehab center, of course Dan would think about him. It wasn't weird, not at all. Or maybe Dan was just a lying alcoholic with no morals, either way, he wanted to know more about the blue eyed man called Phil.

"What about him? You got a little crush on him?" Pj teased. Okay, maybe Dan didn't like Pj that much anymore. Dan ran a hand through his hair nervously.

"I just want to know a little about him," Dan insisted. Okay, maybe he wanted to know everything about the very attractive stranger. He was just really pretty... was that weird? No-no. Dan was just curious, right? He set his hand back down by his side and watched Pj closely, ready to absorb any information he could about the stranger, like a dry sponge dunked into a bucket of water.

"Well, as far as I know he's single," Pj paused for a moment to wink at Dan to which Dan replied with an eye roll, "he's also both the maid and the nurse-this is a pretty shitty center by the way, the place is pretty much a dump-and he's probably older than you."

"Wow don't you know a lot," Dan said sarcastically. He couldn't help but cross his arms around his chest.

"What? I don't keep tabs on the guy, and I've only been here a couple of weeks and I'm not exactly the best person here, I've snuck a couple beers in and gotten busted every damn time," Pj told Dan. Then he smirked. "I think I saw him check you out by the way."

"W-What? No way." Dan felt his cheeks went red, he automatically spun around to try and hide the embarrassment. He couldn't deny how his heart fluttered in his chest. Pj was just teasing Dan though, it wasn't real. Phil didn't check Dan out, no way. Dan walked over to his bag, uncrossing his arms as he walked. He unzipped his back and grabbed a stack of clothes and opened the drawer to his dress which sat next to his bed. Wooden, worn, and very very bland. He couldn't help but read the carved things on the bottom of the drawer.

Fuck this place & these people

I want a bloody drink

Everyone in here is a asshole!

Dan mentally cringed at the awful grammar and terrible handwriting. Dan agreed with the second thing though, he wanted a drink really badly. His was beginning to get foggy with a migraine and he hated the withdraw he was suffering from. This was probably the longest he's been been sober in the past five years, which was sad because it had only been two days. Maybe a little less.

"I have a killer headache," Dan hissed out of no where as he was setting his last shirt in the drawer. It wasn't a lie.

"Go to the nurse, maybe he'll give you an aspirin, or maybe he'll give you some kisses," Pj teased. Dan just shook his head, which sent a million hammers banging into skull at once. Dan let out a small moan in pain. "Oh gee Dan, you getting a little too excited over there?"

"Shut the fuck up," Dan spat at Pj. Pj chuckled at this, which sent a wave of frustration through Dan. Why was he laughing?! Dan literally felt like he was dying!

"I'll take you to the nurse, hopefully Phil's in his office," Pj stood up and started walking towards the door. Dan followed slowly because wow his head hurt. Dan followed as fast as he could and kept up with Pj's fast pace as much as he could, but ugh his head hurt so bad. Eventually they reached a door that had the work "nurse" on its navy tag.

"Here we are good sir," Pj said, slapping Dan on the back and beginning to walk away. But before he left completely he managed to call, "Good luck getting him to fuck you!" Over his shoulder. Dan rolled his eyes at Pj's rude comment and knocked on Phil's wooden door.

"Come in!" Phil called from inside. Dan opened the door with his right hand, his left one busy cradling his aching head. Inside was the blue eyed beauty known as Phil sitting behind a wooden desk who was scribbling something on a piece of paper. He was wearing thick black framed glasses which somehow managed to make him look more attractive than earlier. There was a computer on his desk with several papers, along with a few little nerdy trinkets. There was two chairs on the side of Phil's desk that was closest to Dan so he took a seat in one. On the wall behind Phil there was a few tall cabinets and a sink. "What's the matter?" Phil asked, not looking up from the stack of papers on his desk.

"I have a killer migraine," Dan announced. Phil looked up from his papers and smiled once he saw Dan.

"Name?" He requested, his voice sweet and warm. It reminded Dan of a warm winter coat on a chilly December day, warm and laced with fluff, guarding him from the brutal weather.

"Daniel James Howell," Dan told him, removing his hand from he head. Phil nodded and set down his pen. He turned to his computer and typed a few letters into the keyboard. The computer was white and bulky and was probably older than Dan was, weighed more than him, and was really really slow. Dan would call it slower than him, but in reality a rock could probably beat Dan in a race.

"Mhm," Phil hummed, clicking something on his screen Dan couldn't see. "Here you are! Daniel James Howell, number one twenty seven!" Dan loved the way his name rolled off of Phil's tongue. He loved how it sounded when Phil said it. But that was normal, right?

"It's not like I don't appreciate the banter, but can we just get my headache taken care of please? It's killing me," Dan whined. Phil giggled and the sound was so sweet it almost made up for the fact that he was taking so long to just hand Dan an aspirin. Almost.

"Yessiree," Phil sung, standing up and walking over to the cabinet behind him. Dan couldn't help but notice the way Phil's hips swung as he walked-okay maybe that was a little bit of a weird thought. Phil hummed a little song as he picked up a bottle of pills and opened it up. He took out a plastic cup and half filled it with tap water from the sink. He walked over to where Dan sat and handed him the pill. Dan's skin tingled when Phil's fingers brushed against his outstretched palm. That was normal though, right? It just tickled a little bit. Dan put the small pill in his mouth and Phil handed him the water. Dan took a big swig of the water and swallowed. He handed the cup back to Phil who walked back over to the sink and dumped the rest out and then threw the cup in the trash bin that sat next to Phil's desk. Dan wouldn't of wasted a drop of that if it had any alcohol at all in it.

"I have no idea how I'm going to survive three months without any alcohol," Dan thought out loud. Phil laughed, his tongue poking out of his teeth a little as he did so.

"I did it not too many years ago," Phil said. That was the last thing Dan expected to hear from the man. Phil just seemed too... good. He seemed very sweet and innocent, like a little kitten. Soft and frail. Dan couldn't even picture Phil anywhere near a bar, let alone drunk out of his mind and slurring his words. That just didn't seem like Phil. The fact that Dan felt so close to Phil even though he didn't even know the man was kind of odd. Dan noted that how he described Phil was similar to how the family and friends of serial killers described the killer.

"Really?" Dan gasped. Phil nodded, smiling still. Shook ran through Dan instead of blood.

"I was only about a year younger than you. Five years sober this March," Phil commented, a content look on his face. "You'll get used to it. Even after five years it's still hard for me sometimes, but I'm taking it one step at a time,"

"Huh, I can't picture you drunk," Dan blurred. Phil's personality was just too... adorable. Phil laughed again. "What's so funny?" Dan questioned.

"You really don't remember, huh?" Dan shook his head, confused. "Well I guess it makes sense, you were pretty hammered. Anyway, I helped you home once when you pretty much passed out outside of a bar in London a few years back. Seeing you like that was the reason I got sober and eventually got this job. I realized that it wasn't healthy to throw your life away like that and seeing someone as young as you in that state broke my heart and so I decided I wanted to help people get sober. I guess I finally get to help the person who helped me,"

"I didn't do anything," Dan said. He was really shocked, but he guessed that was why he felt so safe around Phil, because Phil had helped him before.

"Yes you did Dan. You opened my eyes and made me finally put my life in focus," Phil said. Dan didn't know how to feel. How was he supposed to feel? Was there a way he was supposed to feel?

No, there wasn't, he realized. Feelings weren't wrong or right, but they were yours. It wasn't wrong to dislike someone and it wasn't wrong to like someone either. Feelings turned into actions though. There was wrong and there was right actions. It was wrong to hurt someone but it was right to comfort someone. But how did you distinguish what was a wrong action and what was a right action? The little voice in your head. At first it always sounded like Dan's mum, telling him not to eat his brother's cookie or telling him not to run the red light. Over time though it started to sound like Dan. It told him to not smoke that cigarette he'd stolen from his dad. It even told him not to drink so much, it was the reason he was in rehab. He had ignored it all those years ago when he ended up drunk out of his mind and passed out outside of some random bar in London. It told him to trust Phil, and he listened to it.

•••

In rehab Dan learned to trust that little voice.

It told him to not take a drink of the vodka Pj managed to smuggle in, even though every other part of his body wanted it so so bad.

It told Dan to fake a headache a couple of times to go and see Phil.

It told Dan to not lose his temper when Phil found the vodka in his and Pj's room and Pj insisted it was Dan's.

It told him to calmly explain to Phil that it was Pj's and that Dan would do any blood tests to prove it.

But now, as Dan was packing up to leave rehab, it told Dan to do something a little different. He opened up the first drawer in his dresser and crossed out all the rude messages in it. Instead he replaced the terrible messages with new ones.

It gets better

You can do it

Never lose hope <3

It was cheesy and kind of-okay, very-stupid, but Dan couldn't help it. It was true, and like sweet little Phil, Dan wanted to help people. He new the truth behind the people who drown themselves in alcohol every night. They were not bad people, no. They were just broken people who ignored the little voice in their head, the one that would help them get better.

People can inspire you to help others or help yourself, but when it come down to it, you're the only one who can save yourself.

The voice will tell him to agree to go on his first date with Phil.

It will tell him that he has a crush on Phil and has since he first saw him.

It will tell him to come out to his family.

It will tell him to look into beautiful bright blue eyes and say 'I do'.

It will tell him to sign those adoption papers. Daniel James Howell-Lester.

It will tell him that it's okay to explain why Daddy and Papa don't drink all the same 'grown up' drinks as all their friends' Daddies drink to his children.

It will tell him to tell his children that no, having two Dads isn't weird.

It will tell him that it's okay to cry as his youngest child leaves for university.

It will tell him that he wants to stay with Phil until the day he dies.

And he will listen to it. Always and forever, because he's learned from his mistakes.

[imperialdramons]

Things I personally can’t stand in fics and writing in general. LONG rant, so stick with me people. This is a long overdue list that’s been in my drafts for ages.) VERY SUBJECTIVE in case that wasn’t obvious from the first sentence lmao. 1) Characters shipping the otp mentioned. I already like said OTP otherwise I wouldn’t be reading this fic. You don’t have to sell me on the concept of these characters dating, again, it’s why I’m reading the fic. You also don’t have to make characters ship them because, again, that’s what you have friends for- you talk to each other about what you like about the ship rather than sit by as a bystander while two other people go on talking about why they like said ship without allowing you to contribute a word. This is what we have social media for- conversation and opinions. 

I really despise when everyone in a fic suddenly decides “these characters ought to date yes they’re soul mates” almost as if they’re part of a hive-mind when this is the most unrealistic thing to expect when you put two characters in a room full of different people. Trust me, most people would be very uninterested in other people’s love life. The most you would get would be a few close friends making gags (but again- you don’t have to sell ME on the concept of the characters dating. I fail to see both the charm and the point of this) If you’re going for realism, this isn’t where you’ll find it. If you’re going for a joke, I fail to see the humor in it. If you’re planning to make me resent a otp I normally would love by literally forcing me to read opinions of people I don’t even know- you brought your A-game pumpkin, and you succeeded. I often get the impression characters that ship the fic’s otp are trying to either parody what I feel about the characters, or tell me how to feel about the characters, and neither of these leave a good impression. Is the point of this stunt to make the characters feel awkward? There’s many different scenarios you could put them into that could make them feel equally as awkward and give more rewarding results- especially since the fics i’ve read including this have had the characters react very little to others “shipping” them- it kind of just goes on in the background (why? if there is no point to it, why include it? again, it feels like you’re trying to sell me something i’ve already bought). Is it written so often bc there’s some satisfying factor in knowing everyone agrees with you both inside and outside the fic? Oh. I think we’ve reached the reason this is so popular in fics. Score 1+ for the hive mind!

2) Convenient stupidity. When a character acts in a way to either mislead or derail the plot from its actual purpose without getting punished for their stupidity or given a chance to redeem themselves. It’s such a time-waster, and often causes the plot to regress and for the characters to go through the same motions again. It’s not a deal-breaker, but it’s a real joykill to have to read about the characters trying to fix a problem that could easily have been avoided had the character just not acted stupid when it seemed convenient to drag things out further.

3) PLEASE DO NOT COPY SITCOM JOKES FROM SHOWS LIKE SEINFELD AND THE BIG BANG THEORY I WILL LITERALLY FLIP MY LID. It doesn’t take a trained eye to notice when a joke doesn’t fit the phrasing of a character. Some lines from popular sitcoms work with every character because they’re so generic, but sometimes the lines sound absolutely out of character when they come from a character who feels like they’re being held at gunpoint just to hammer in a joke or two. I have seen characters butchered momentarily just to hammer in a few jokes that immediately lose their humor, mainly because the jokes are not funny if I can tell someone is forcing the words into the character’s mouth. It doesn’t sound like anything they’d actually say, but something someone else wants them to say. It isn’t a deal-breaker, but it really takes me out of the fic. There was one fic that actually had me dig through my bad 90′s sitcom archive to find 3 shows with the exact same joke as said fic. Do you know how disturbing it is to read a fic and suddenly see Jerry Seinfeld’s face pop up in your mind like a jump scare? It’s terrifying.

4) I can’t stand when a fic has all the depression tags, all the dark and tragic story tropes, but let’s throw in a joke in every third paragraph despite talking about a dark subject- let’s even ruin the most serious moments with a joke because hey jokes are supposed to break tension right. Let’s not care if it looks out of place or forced, we have to have a joke dammnit. Yes, humor is often used to lighten up the mood when things get too serious- but you actually have to allow your audience to have a pause for things to remain serious for a while before you can make a joke. A lot of the joke relies on the element of surprise (timing), and the delivery. If you don’t allow us to breathe in and grow accustomed to the serious and dark tone, you won’t be able to make us laugh when you genuinely write something funny. It’s just harder to get into it when there’s so many jokes. Instead of being a dark fic with some nicely paced jokes, it turns into an internal conflict of whether or not you label the fic as a dark humor satire or dark themed fic with a lot of comedy in it that just doesn’t pace well. Very few people can get away with this without making the humor seem completely out of place (but I have actually seen it done), and it takes a huge amount of skill to actually make dark humor work- because when dark humor doesn’t work, it just sounds offensive or insulting. (Dark Humor is often offensive, but what’s offensive has to either have some truth to it, or genuinely be funny to work as dark humor.) Meanwhile, when regular humor doesn’t work, we often either don’t notice the joke, or just shrug at it “yeah it was bad but i’ve read worse” and keep reading. I have seen so many fics write dark themes wrong by making light of a very dark situation and that is all fine and good if you’re writing a comedy that is mocking tragic and dark tropes in the form of a satire. However, this doesn’t work if you want said fic to be “inspirational” or “educational” (or even SERIOUS) about mental illness or disorders. It really just confuses the reader as to what your actual goal is with the fic if you’re both trying to mock the problem, and educate people about the problem. This just goes out to the smartasses that dismiss criticism bc “I has the depression so you are wrong and your opinion is stupid bc you dont have the depression so anything you say is wrong 8D” Please gently fuck off.

5) This might be an unpopular opinion, but I personally rank a fic’s appeal by how well they conduct a premise. You might also say I rank fics by how badly they mess up an easy premise/moral they have to work with and make a simple topic seem very absurd. I don’t care if the premise is simple- if they wrote it well, they deserve props for it. If they wrote a difficult premise and the fic kind of fell apart, I can still give them some props because I can tell there was effort put into trying to make something work. However, when a fic takes an easy premise and completely butchers it, ohhhh boy. It almost becomes something akin to reading my immortal- for shits and giggles- a beautiful trainwreck. However, here’s a fun fact; I don’t hate my immortal, or hellstorm evangelion, and wouldn’t class them as “the worst fics in harry potter and evangelion”. Why? Because they started off with an absurd premise. As soon as I read an absurd premise, I know the fic is going to be absurd. The fic delivers what it promises, and I genuinely can’t flaw it for that. Of course the fics are bad, OOC on top of crazy ideas, but it didn’t really market itself differently or as anything but OOC and crazy- and this is why I also don’t take them seriously- because in a way- they don’t take themselves seriously.

What I do take seriously however are fics that try their hardest to make a point and then fail miserably because they didn’t bother to do even the smallest amount of research- and I really do mean the most minuscule amount of research. I read a fic where a bruise lasted for 2 months. A bruise. Lasted 2 months. If a bruise is big and dark enough after 2 weeks you shouldn’t see a doctor, you should see an exorcist- because that thing needs to be sent to the shadow realm and fast. 2 months? A simple google search would have solved this. I actually didn’t know how long a bruise lasted for, but I took one look at that and shook my head, thinking “No. I really don’t think this is accurate.” but I actually decided to go look it up because “I might be wrong”. I might be nitpicking, but when your fic is trying to go for realism it doesn’t really help that you have these small bits of misinformation that could easily be corrected... One or two won’t kill the mood if the fic is good enough, but if the fic focuses on a subject that involves, oh, I don’t know, doctors/medicine (which i might add- i know near to nothing about) and relies on misinformation that even I can spot?... Maybe it wouldn’t be a bad idea to just skim some reliable sources for relevant information about what you’re writing about. Small aside- I get bothered when people put the word “literally” in front of things they mean to say are “figurative”. I can actually gloss over this most times (i do it too sometimes almost unknowingly), but when someone writes “Literally kicked the door down-” and in the very next sentence, say the door “swung open”- No. That is inaccurate. You can’t just shove “literally” in front of things and not expect it to change meaning. That is literally illiteracy.

6) Nicknames. I really cringe at “Darling” or “Cutie” in fics. Yes, people do this in real life and I’m guilty of it too- but have you ever been that one friend in a friendship circle where you don’t exactly feel as if you belong there and then you’re hearing 2 people call each other "darling” over and over again? Doesn’t that feel even the least bit uncomfortable? I often get that impression when I read fics of two characters going back and forth like this- i feel like the awkward third wheel that’s imposing on their fun. I can handle some pet names, but when they constantly say “darling” and “sweetie” over and over again, I can’t help but to feel as if the characters are losing some of their character in the dialogue (it is actually very corny). Most fics of non-canon ships are already putting characters into situations that are hard to swallow- but nicknames like “darling”? That’s probably an aspect of fics i’ll never be able to handle. I can’t say why I feel this way other than the fact it always feels forced and shoehorned in (unless the character themselves have also used this word multiple times) There are of course the exceptions. The exceptions are the characters who you can actually see say this kind of thing. Ringabel from Bravely Default is an easy example, or say, Cat Noir from Miraculous- but the phrases fit because they align with their character, and aren’t just put there to “be cute” but to be “accurate” to the portrayal. That doesn’t mean “if you dont use pet names for these characters, you’re misrepresenting them”- it just means that these specific characters seem like they might engage in petnames, whereas someone as... hm... let’s say Jotaro from jjba probably wouldn’t do it in a serious manner, and neither would Cyrus from Platinum. Some characters fit the bill and others don’t, and I know this is highly subjective, but to make things simple; the goofy characters are always the ones who I can see use such language seriously or unironically without it feeling out of place.

THERE’S MORE, But I’m tired and this rant has been long long long and I want to go eat eat eat. Maybe later i’ll add a few more in a brief because this kind of went on for a lil too long than necessary.