#YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW HAPPY I AM RIGHT NOW
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#YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW HAPPY I AM RIGHT NOW#Ive been blasting Naseba Narunosa Nanairo Tamago and Shoshin wo KEEP ON! and Gachi de Katouze!#ITS. A PROBLEM#sky rewatches#oh and Tachiagariyo too ofc#ina11 go#ina11#<- for me to find later#Sky rambles
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should i accept this job i was offered?
#its a move to an expensive area that i will likely have yo live w multiple roommates and idk if im i to that right now in my life :/#its a really good job but it could also be bery corporate#i would be glad to leave my situation BUT that means rent goes up a lot#and i kinda just wanna keep saving up#and idk!! like i would be dumb not to take the job but im kinda leaning that way rn#i know the area i would live jn is literally peoples DREAM but i know how isolating and exhausting the culture can be#like if you havent lived i a place like it you literally cannot understand#but i HAVE#anyways thr job and the interviewers were so fucking nice and everyone seems so happy to have me#and like it WOULD be so good for my career#but i just dont know!!#and im not guaranteed a job where i am right now which is SCARY#SO SCARY#like what if i say no to this and never get another job offer ever in my life#this is my first fullyime job offer jn literally three years what the fuck#how am i even considering sayjng no#and yet...
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not to be a milennial but harry potter and the prisoner of azkaban really is that bitch....
#mom wanted to rewatch the movies so we've been going thru them <3#talk about a movie thats just like. grief. i turn into the jamie lee curtis halloween trauma supercut#SORRY..... the visuals are peak like that IS the hp vibe to ME and i am BLOWN AWAY this movie was made in 2004 it feels ahead of its time#the first two are so whimsical and magical enrapturing and this movie is like. a well worn cardigan. this feels 2011 cozycore to me#sorry but the introduction of lupin becoming a comforting trusted guardian type of figure AND the dementors representing hollow depression#this 13 yr old whos been kept in the dark on so many things being extra vulnerable prey to them bc of the severe trauma#but getting lessons on how to withstand that creeping dread.. through happy memories... still bonding w lupin increasngly ouagh...#the grief between them both over james and lily. also btw ofc defense against the dark arts being fighting yr fears through laughter. aaaaaa#and then sirius. black. im. i know we meme on the twelve years of it! in azkaban! but as a bitch whos now closer to those characters in age#and can appreciate and understand them obv more than i could when i was. a tween. that just hits like ok shit. VALID#so valid and real to see the child of your friends you knew at that age but who DIED and then see the friend who betrayed them#to see like the best of BOTH of them mirrored and living on in him and be like yknow what???? you WILL be protected frm that same fate#hoooo the briefest moment where harry might hope things will turn out okay. w sirius' name being cleared and peter having to explain himself#and sirius being like hey i get it if you want to stay w your family that is fine but. if you wanna move in w me...#(harry relaying this to hermione later as well. dreaming of a place fr just the two of them somewhere in the countryside#somewhere..... sirius might see the sky..... bc he thinks he would like that after all those years locked up do not even touch me rn.......)#only fr everything to turn to shit two friends fighting w deadly force. the chance to set this right slipping off into the night.#a million dementors descending relentlessly until utter exhaustion and certain death. some strange salvation? fight for a second chance?#but then still havign to say goodbye when they only just GOT this. and everything still being so. god. and lupin having to leave as well.#the thought of sirius also WANTING that guardian type connection but being forced to live in 1. a cave barely living more freely than before#2. then being confined to the stuffy somber abusive home he ran away from as a teen w that portrait still up there and everything.. bitch...#oh man the way i KNOW when we get to ootp (my favourite) its gonna leave me blasted into a million little pieces#the way i know shit like the knowing wink the entirety of the wall tapestry room scene and of course nice one james is gonna DESTROY me..#dont even talk to me abt that dark turn at the end of gof and how everything after gets soooo. god. w everything just getting destroyed and.#i cant even think abt it i cant even talk about it. wah#i dont care btw that they aged those guys up undermining how insanely young these people died. perfect casting fr the remaining marauders ok
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fuck
#like idk i never realized just how bad she hurt me. i didnt even rly realize she hurt me at all#bc there are so so so many ways she sldve reacted so much worse. but like i never thought someone cld just straight up ignore it.#like i get the way i told her was dumb and confusing. ok. i can understand that. whatever#but idk. she said she wished my sister had told her years earlier so that she cldve helped her back then#but then suddenly it's different when it's me. suddenly it's 'but youve always been my little girl' and 'oh i dont know that sounds dangerou#s' and 'are you sure?' and 'how long have you felt like this'#well it's been almost 5 fucking years now and it hasnt changed. i havent changed. fuck#i trusted her. i trusted her to be there for me and to support me and to accept me and she threw it back in my face and never even blinked#i can never ever trust her again and she doesnt care. she doesnt even know bc shes so wrapped up in all the fucking lies she tells herself#fuck. she did everything wrong. fuck. i can never fully trust anyone with this part of me again bc of her#and it's awful bc it's such an important part of me. it brings me so much joy and i think on it often and i love myself for it#but it's just simmering in my chest and every time i think of letting it hit air again i freeze bc i thought it was safe once and it WASNT.#i wanted to get my name changed before high school. i wanted to start the medical process. i wanted all the thing i thought shed do for me.#my wants and my understanding of my identity has changed now but it still hurts.#it hurts so bad to see other ppl my age get all of that and to have the support of their family and to not be afraid to put a name to it all#im happy for them. but it's so awful hearing her point those ppl out w no self awareness like oh thats so good for them isnt that sweet#I AM RIGHT HERE! YOU COULD BE DOING ALL OF THAT! I NEEDED YOU TO BE THAT FOR ME!#and every time she does acknowledge it she gets it completely wrong or it's just to bemoan how little she understands#'oh everyones changing their name now its so confusing' 'im really trying i dont know what else you want from me' NO YOURE NOT! YOURE NOT!#YOUVE NEVER BEEN WILLING TO TRY. NOT FOR ME.#you never fucking loved me you loved the idea of what you thought i would be and you cant fucking let it go even when the truth is staring#you dead in the face. fuck. you complain about how i 'hate you' or 'think youre stupid' well maybw treat me with an ounce of respect and act#like you understand the things youve EXPLICITLY BEEN TOLD. even a little.#but honestly it's too late. if she were to suddenly have a change of heart now i wouldnt give a damn.#the damage is done you dont get to have this part of me and act like youre such a good and supportive mother.#i cant even say i hate her. i love her but shes hurt me more than anyone else ever has and i can never trust her to actually love me or even#fucking see me or support anything about me that actually matters to me#i dont know. i dont know. thinking about it again.#ive thought abt telling my dad. not bc it wld do any good but bc ik he values honesty and maybe hed throw me a 'damn that sucks'#my sister said this is something i have to fight on but she doesnt get it. i have no ground to stand on as far as shes concerned
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Yesterday a man told me it is obvious that I am going to be an advocate for women my whole life and that I can do so much good for other women if I stay on the path I am now. and today my boyfriend told me that he doesn't want to talk to me all the time because I'm not that fun to talk to
#he backtracked really quickly after saying that. like one message later he was like 'i love talking to you we are both just busy a lot'#which makes sense but... i'm not really made for men i dont think. ive never been able to understand them or connect with them#not on the level that i have been able to with certain women. and i really like this one man but i dont know if we will ever#get to that point where i feel like we are truly connected. i dont know if i Can connect to a man the way that they wish i would#and sometimes (like right now) i feel as if i am wasting time and energy on loving a man because our dynamic will never be equal#i love talking to him and i can do nothing but text him for hours and that is s great day to me but apparently he gets bored.#like. there is no way to solve that i dont think. we are just different. different things make us happy#how different is Too different for people to work?#i want us to work because he makes me happy. except for right now- i feel like a dumbass#my posts
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This is a vent post. Carry on.
Saw some photos of someone who took their Great Pyr out on the PNW coast. And it hit me with the reminder that Denver was supposed to come surfing with us for my birthday last year. We had the cabins booked, I was so excited to have him on the beach with me. Had everything planned. And then, well, he got sick.
We still ended up taking photos of me with his collar out on the beach. But seeing those photos of the big dog on the coast just hit me like "yeah I was supposed to have that too".
#you know when something little strikes you and then big grief hits?#yeah...#in the last week or so I've circled back to#feeling like my dog must be right around the corner#because its been so long! i want to hug him i want to pet him again#i want to see his full body wiggles and hear the floor shake when he lays down#i want him to come to bed with me i want our daily walks back#i want his dinner happy dance and for him to sleep on my toes while i work#i just miss him so much#and then its just... now its the rest of my life without him#brain having a hard time understanding that#i dont WANT a whole life its been 10 months i want him back now#anyways... this has been a vent post#i feel so silly sometimes for how fucked up i am over losing my dog#so many people out there have lost more#and Denver was a dog! 10 years was a full life for him!#and I've had many pets who have passed#but my god Denver was the great love of my life#dem speaks
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had to witness oscar do promo for the t*xas l*nghorns, my school lost TERRIBLY in football for the second weekend in a row, and mclaren was fucking stupid as usual. horrible terrible bad weekend to be a sports fan
#no but like actually. you guys dont understand how absolutely fucking distraught i was over landoscar going to UT#like STOP trying tk make them college football fans unless its MY college#let alone the longhorns of all godforsaken teams#and when oscar took a picture with the golden hat………. something genuinely died inside of me you guys dont even understand#genuinely had to refrain from rolling around the ground in the fetal position#anyway.#not surprised that mclaren did shit this weekend because of course they would in texas bc texas SUCKS#this is just turning into a hate post about texas honestly. real of me tbh#anyway. forgetting texas was ever a thing#hoping mexico will be better <3#i’m at the point where i dont think landos going to win the championship (bc maybe if i tell myself this enough by the time abu dhabi rolls#around i wont have to kill myself at 9:00 in the morning on a random sunday) i just want him to win races in General#because him being happy makes Me happy#and of course oscar should be right next to him#or vice versa#bc duh#idc who wins as long as Other People. don’t win#my progression of me becoming obsessed with f1 is so funny to me bc i was originally a ferrari fan#(funny considering the first race i watched was miami and THEN monaco) and now it’s just progressed into me being a steady mclaren fan#and hating everyone else on track#i WILL SAY THOUGH i have been an oscar truther since day one once i found out he and i shared the same birthday#bc how could i not be in love with him after that#anyway#this has rapidly lost the plot#im not even sure what the plot was#i am going to bed and hoping that this week goes by quickly bc i already miss f1#lacey talks
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stream of consciousness type deal.
#people's experiences of you will be so drastically different from what you're like when relaxing/unmasking at home and they'll be shocked#when you live together and you thought you let them see what you were like normally except most of the time theyve seen you at home its an#Occassion™ so ofc im gonna be alert and jumping around and talkative bc theres a lot happening and im really happy theyre there#and i can be still. but once they see me day after day exhausted and overstimulated its different bc i am different#i dont feel like i am but i am#and if they dont believe when you explain whats happening then shit hits the fan#for a while i did not understand why they were getting so mad at me at dinner#the other people there understand how i can be foggy or overstimulated and just need to eat and im happy to be there i just need to not look#at anyone or say much and im dizzy from working all day. i need to mash for a bit all ill be good. theyve been generous to take me as honest#when i tell them what im doing.#but a person who is not used to seeing me that way will start thinking im rolling my eyes at whats being said when im actually staring into#space or trying to refocus or trying to get my body to stay in itself instead of drifting off and they think im quietly judging and ik like#im so sorry but fr im not even listening to the group conversation and im not thinking anything negative about you im just gathering my body#i SWEAR. also its agreed that i take part in a group meal instead of isolating with my food bc i need to eat right now too#now that ive stopped working and im going to go back to working after this meal so. this is what i have to do. it is understood and you're#somewhat new to being here on a daily basis but I'm serious i just have to do this and im not being shady im just Something™#(aka exhausted/overstimulated/neurodivergent.) but when i get up with the gathered dishes without making eye contact im automatically angry#and im judgemental and manipulative and trying to control everyone's mood by making my problems everyone's problems with my sighing and eye#rolling. im like. again im not rolling my eyes im trying to focus my eyes. and im not sighing at whats being said im letting out the breath#i realized ive been holding bc im holding myself back from an anxiety rollercoaster drop bc im very overstimulated rn and i was asked to be#here to share meals and deal with it in front of everyone and you arent understanding that id be doing the same thing in private#nothing's WRONG im just OVERSTIMULATED RN and im pulling my body back and im not thinking anything about ANYONE in this room but im starting#to NOW bc you keep assigning meaning where ive told you repeatedly theres none and i get why you're interpreting it this way but i promise#thats not what im doing and your reasons for why im doing it are not accurate.
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Fuck.
#whT if i just. what if i just. what if i just#haha. hehehe. hahahaha. fuck. me.#i blinked. i fucking BLINKED. suddenly theyre yelling at each other.#'shes on her period her emotions are out of control rn'#no you dont understand. thats not how it works. you dont snap like that bc ur on ur period.#im scared. im so fucking scared. what#if she has bpd too. what if it passed down to her and its judt showing now?#yk when it happened i only felt hurt in my chest? i didnt feel anything at all. all that emotional training paid off ig#yeard and years of telling myself to shut my emotions off rlly worked bc ive never heard her scream and cuss like that before#yet i didnt feel anything. but i did feel my inner child crying. i felt deja vu.#a distant memory of when she was yelling and arguing with HIM while i cry and piss myself on the rug when i was barely 2 years old#when my mom yelled and started sobbing and started cussing and fuck#it was so triggering but it felt like my body stopped working. it stopped completely. but like#my instincts. felt. like. it was on fight or flight mode. i wanted to run. my legs ached and i couldnt walk but it felt like i wanted to run#i wanma falk about it i wanna ralk about it so bad but what if i talk too much and ppl see how depressed i really am#i dont want to give off rhat impression. i want to give off a happy impressiom even tho im not#for ronight. and tomorrow. i dont wanna function properly.#ive functioned enouvh this week. ill take a break today and tomorrow.#for tomorrow. ill pretend i died and my ghost is wandering around my room. for tomorrow ill rot my soul away.#ill pick up the pieces for it later. i dont feel like piecing myself together right now.#im so. im so fucking tired. i feel like the only thing thatll comfort me rn is to hug a clay statue of yuuta for some odd reason#ive been so unbelievanly depressed for the past few months fuck i want to die i want to die so bad#and theres not even like a single reason why. i dont rememver. i cant remember. i cant feel. anything.#i dont wsnt to live right now. can i just. die. and then get brought back to life later when i feel ready again.
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ITS FUCKIGN HAPPENING
#YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW FUCKING EXCITED I AM. YOU DONT GET IT OH MY GOD#I WAS JUST UTSUPOSTING YESTERDAY I AM SO UNFATHOMABLY HAPPY RIGHT NOW OH MY GODD#virgetxt
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...
#im really just ranting so pleasr ignore this post it really isnt that serious i just need to vomit it all out before i crash#i wish i knew who i was i wish i knew who i was going to be who i would havr been before everythong went to shit#before my parents beat my soul into submission before i retreated into myself so hard im killing myself just trying to come out again#i dont know who i am or what i want or even how to begin ttying any of that#my therapist started saying all the same things my dad would say abiut me and about my qork and about my life#id been with her for over 5 years so maybe she is right maybe my dad was right maybe my parents were right maybe i do deserve nothing#i hate my body but my partner says its beautiful i can barely face the day but my partner is happy when i do#they say my parents were wrong in so many ways but why is it taking me so long to prove it#ive been bad my whole life o was a bad kid a bad friend a bad adult but i wanna be goood so bad ii might puke#i know i can be good but why cant i prove it why is it stopping me why cant i push my my brain why cant i hit the override and just LIVE#its hard being 25 when i didnt think id make it to 15#its hard living when all you want to do is give up i want to give up i wish i could and maybe a few years ago i would have#but now for the first time in my life i want to live i want to do good but my brain body and soul have no idea how#i think im autistic and the worst part is realizing how much of me that is how much i should havr been cared for#i have to learn how to live in the world but the world is so scary and it hurts and my therapist talkrd a lot about getting used to it#she wanted me to dive in and didnt understand no matter how many qays i tried to explain to her how much it painrd me to try it her way#i wish i could just do it that i could grin and bear it but i cant anymore i cant just do it#i wish i could just become who i was supposed to be someone without the pain and the torture and the constant berating#someone who can have a job and cook dinner and still feel whole after it all#i jist want to live i want to be good i want to get better and i feel like peeling my skin off my body i feel like ripping out my teeth#it makes me feel awful every time i cant do sometbing because i was getting better i couod feel it and now im in hell this is worse#i feel like im experiencing depression for the first time all over again ivw never been so violently thrown bacj into the pit#please i want out i want to hear creaks without thinking someone is 8n my home i want to clean like someone isnt watching me#i want to move around my home like i dont expect to be graded i want to be able to sleep at night and not have tomorrow ruined by flashback#im so so tired and for the first time in my life o dont wanna give up i wanna be better but i dont know how#every time i try to get help something goes wrong and i run out of insurance soon so im probably just fucked#my antidepressants arent doing shit and my birth control makes everything harder and i jist wish i could take medication and live#im tired im tired but ive been crying in the bathroom for over an hour because sometbing so stupid triggered me#and now im a child again and i have work tomorrow and i cant scream and cry into my partner cause they have work#they work so hard for us and i can barely do a day im so fucking pathetic and yet they stay with me
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it’s never over | sebastian vettel
pairing: sebastian vettel x actress!reader
summary: ten fateful years ago, y/n and sebastian vettel broke up, breaking hearts all over the world. present day, y/n starts leaving small hints about finding another lover. the world goes crazy.
liked by redbullracing, and 284,920 others!
ynandsebplscomeback: we are gathered here today, to mourn the loss of yn and sebastian vettels relationship. 10 years ago today, their breakup was announced, shattering the hearts of millions. please, we ask for a ten minute silence from you all, thank you.
view comments below!
user1: pls-i can’t take this rn 💔
user2: IT BEEN TEN YEARS??????
user3: ten depressing ass years
user4: the way we all thought they were coming back when they were sennas memorial tribute 🧍
user5: THEY WERE TALKING AND GIGGLING IT UP!!!!!! THEY TRICKED US 💔
redbullracing: 💔💔.
user6: i honestly think nobody was more hurt about the breakup then the redbull admin. they have been liking y/n+seb content since they broke up 😭😭
user7: THEY BROKE UP SO SEB COULD FOCUS ON HIS CAREER. HE NO LONGER HAS A CAREER SO THEY NEED TO GET BACK TOGHER RIGHT NOW.
user8: i remember when seb announced his retirement and everyone was so happy??? because this meant a more chance of y/n and him getting back together 😭
user9: i can’t do this right now. maybe tomorrow. not today.
user10: everyday i pray they get back together, today i will pray harder.
liked by redbullracing, charles_leclerc, and 837,205 others!
yourusername: calm days 💗
view comments below!
user11: no….no…no this can’t be
user12: who tf is that
user13: WHAT IS THIS?? ON THE TEN YEAR ANNIVERSARY?? WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS
user14: m-maybe that’s seb?? pls cmon tell me it’s seb. y/n i beg.
user15: you’re dating another white man and it ISNT seb??? this is unacceptable.
redbullracing: why would you do this to me
yourusername: ?
user16: DONT. do not. question mark us right now.
user17: THAT ISNT SEB Y/N AND YOU KNOW IT.
user18: guys don’t worry!! that’s definitely seb!! just look at the finger tips…i compared them to other pictures of seb and it’s literally him!
user19: this is what crazy looks like
charles_leclerc: 🤩🤩
user20: WHAT DO YOU KNOW CHARLES
user21: SEE because if it WASNT seb charles definitely wouldn’t have commented. he’s the biggest y/n+seb shipper, behind the redbull admin ofc
user22: unless i see that man man’s face, and im 1003847% certain it isn’t seb. i will continue to believe that it is sebastian and they reconnected and are planning to live happily ever after 😝😝
user23: can you guys stop harassing y/n for moving on after 10 years 😑😑
user24: seb and y/n haven’t dated anyone since they split. i feel like it’s time for her to move on. this is good for her
liked by yourusername, scuferiaferrari, and 962,927 others!
sebastianvettel: calmer days!
view comments below!
user25: wait a damn minute
user26: ITS HAPPENING STAY CALM EVERYONE STAY FUCKING CALM
user27: that’s y/ns leg. i fucking know it.
user28: AND HER HAND!! ITS HER FUCKING HAND GUYS!!
user29: WAR IS OVER
user30: omg wait i’m crying
user31: istg if this turns out to NOT be y/n. i will be killing myself.
redbullracing: are those the birds chirping? the sun shining?
user32: i know admin is jump in up and down in happiness
user33: OKAY GUYS WIAT WAIT WAIT J BEED TO PROCESS THIS. I NEED TIME
charles_leclerc: ❤��❤️
user34. HE KBEW!! HE FUCKING KNEW!!
user34: wait he knew….
user34: YOU FUCKING KNEW AND DIDNT SAY ANYTHING FOR GOD KNOWS HOW LONG?? YOU SICK SICK FUCK
user35: nobody will ever understand how happy i am right now
liked by redbullracing, yourusername, and 1,730,026 others!
sebastianvettel: happy one year anniversary to my beautiful beautiful wife ❤️❤️ here’s to many more!
view comments below!
redbullracing: what
redbullracing: is this a joke?
redbullracing: please don’t mess with me like this
redbullracing: OMG
redbullracing: OH MY GOD
user36: holy. fucking. shit.
user37: you sick fuckers. YOU HAVE SEEN WHAT YOUR BREAKUP CAUSED AND ALL THIS TIME YOUVE BEEN MARRIED???
user38: FOR A WHOLE ASS YEAR NO LESS
user39: i don’t know if im happy that your married or mad that you LET ME THINK YOU WERE STILL BROKEN UP
user40: so many mixed emotions rn
user41: this is making my head hurt…in a good way
user42: THIS MEANS THEY WERE TIGTHER DURING THE SENNA TRIBUTE. I FUCKING KNEW IT.
charles_leclerc: happy one year 👏👏❤️
user43: okay but how did charles keep this a secret…
user44: RIGHT?? i feel liked he’d be the first to accidentally say something 😭
liked by sebastianvettel, charles_leclerc, and 964,016 others!
yourusername: my beautiful beautiful husband 💗 one year down! many more to come!!
view comments below!
redbullracing: my god it’s real…
redbullracing: MY GOD ITS REAL
redbullracing: AHHHHHH
user45: this is the most relatable thing ever
user46; thank you gods 🙏🙏🙏
user47: ive reached peak happiness
user48: okay but when are we getting wedding pics???🤨
user49: NO FUCK THIS. i need a timeline of EVERYTHING. when they met, when the got together, when they b-broke up, WHEN THEY STARTED DATING AGAIN??, when they got engaged, AND WHEN THEY GOT FUCKING MARRIED???
user50: what kills me is that we will probably never get this information 💔💔
user51: i can die peacefully now, thank you y/n ❤️
. . .
notes; my first seb smau, hope you enjoy!! :)
#sebastian vettel x reader#sebastian vettel x you#sebastian vettel x y/n#sebastian vettel social media au#sebastian vettel smau#sebastian vettel fanfic#sebastian vettel fic#f1 x y/n#f1 x female reader#f1 social media au#f1 smau#f1 x you#f1 imagine#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#formula one x reader#formula one x you#formula one smau
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how do people hate love?
love is such a happy warm and gentle feeling. it is quite probably the happiest emotion i can understand to possibly exist, and i do not understand how people can just detest it.
and i don’t mean in a romance-repulsed aromantic sort of way, or even in the jokey “y’all are so sweet and lovey it’s disgusting” way. but a genuine, deep-seated hatred of love?
how do people hear even a mere suggestion at the possibility, a damn joke about dating somebody in a hypothetical future, and say point blank, i don’t care i just don’t want to hear about it.
just.. how can people hate love so much they insist on putting others down for talking about a feeling that makes them happy?
#i just don't fucking understand it yall#love is love and love is good#the Exact wording for that last one was: man idc i just dont wanna hear about SHITE#i'm just really upset about it at the moment because some friends just ganged up on me in their absolute trashing of ppl talking about love#and i just love love in general#but more than that i have had such an awfully long and difficult journey with myself about how being vulnerable abt my own feelings and love#because i have spent most of my life just shitting on myself for wanting to talk about my feelings with other people because i feel annoying#i feel unwelcome and foolish. ignored? belittled? what word am i looking for.#i feel like people don't give a shit about what i feel and want me to shut the hell up for crissake#and i've only just recently felt comfortable talking about feelings honestly with friends and now i just.#i want to crawl back into the shame cave with my weaved basket full of hearts and sniffle#god just. fuck people who hate love all right#leave me and my happy mumbles alone#don't immediately rant about how much you hate ppl discussing love and relationships after i say something about someone i'm interested in??#jfc bro just take your wet blanket and have a picnic on the pacific floor don't toss it on me hoping i'll turn into a ghost#excuse me yall i'm just really not happy about thsi right now. some friends just said some shit that rubbed me super wrong and it instantly#shot down the good happy feeling i was finally having during this extreme depressive episode#shut up IM holding the trashtalking breadstick
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inextricably bound - viktor, jayce
summary; stuck in a plane above all else but at least you're together
genre/extra tags; oneshot, fluff, bad jokes?, a dash of angst?, czech viktor, jayvik are canon fuck whatever christian linke was saying, just two bros being soulmates in every timeline and they're each others everything (but not in a gay way am i right chat /j), god forbid two dudes be canonically gay in every timeline, sorry im pissed off, im coping with jayvik being gone, OOC jayvik??, i dont know how to write for jayce well, jayvikreader poly sloppy toppy (jk), it's like implied that reader just got pulled in and doesn't know the dramatic moment they had n the astral plane before finally making up., headcanon that the astral plane is almost like being in limbo for death or reincarnation
[reader's gender not specified or mentioned]
word count; 808
a/n; can you tell im mad that there are jayvik non believers? like hate them all you want, but you can't just say that they were just bros and im glad most of the fandom can understand that. am i absolutely greedy for viktor? yes, but im not taking him away from his literal soulmate/twin flame/whatever the fuck gay shit they got going. also i feel like this isnt my best work but anyways enjoy :)
empty.
that's what being in the astral plane feels like. but it's calm. most of your body is engulfed the stars that you once looked up to. now you were part of that. not as a star but as a being. your face is illuminated a white gold shimmer.
"love?" a voice echoes and before you know it, two familiar faces are close to yours.
"vik? jayce?" your voice echoes in the listless space. and it's only then do you register how.. normal they look again.
despite the stars that cover their body and shimmering light of the ethereal, they look like themselves. it was the viktor and jayce you knew. your hands move, your body floating as you hold viktor's face.
"it's you. viktor.." the mentioned male looks at you, guilt and love in his eyes. jayce's hand rests on the small of his back, a silent encouragement for the shorter man. "it's you.." your voice trembles. viktor can't look you in the eye until jayce's hand gently nudges him, and it's only then that he sees the absolute love pouring from your eyes. "i should be more concerned that we're stuck here, but fuck.. i missed seeing you."
you can't exactly cry in the astral plane. your tears end up sparkling and twinkling away and become part of the galaxy you've been pulled into.
"miláček.." you don't even realize how much you've missed his normal voice until now. even if it did have that ethereal echo, it was still him. your viktor. your forehead presses against his for just a moment.
"you... i have a lot to say, but let me be happy for just a moment." viktor tenses at your words, but he relaxes in your touch. you pull away to give jayce the love you missed giving him.
"jayce.. you did so well. more than well. i don't know everything of what you experienced, but you never gave up. didn't know i could be more thankful for you." jayce smiles brightly at your words as you hold his face between his hands in appreciation.
he looks at you with that look he used to give you and viktor when things we once normal. that silly lovesick grin on his face, but you know he can't express how thankful he is for you and him. "i missed you so much, too. you have no idea." he said softly.
"now, with that out of the way, what exactly happened?" the two men look at each other before slowly explaining how everything started and ended with them. and they definitely ended it, seeing as they were taken here by the crystal that jayce held so dear to him. "but why am i here then? i mean, it makes sense for you two to be here. you're basically soulmates."
"don't say that, miláček. we love you too. whether you're in this timeline or not." viktor said gently, floating to you and holding you in his arms. "we won't allow you to think so lowly like that. especially when jayce is around. and especially because that line of thinking does not seem to do well for us. my insecurities blinded me to want to fix everything to a dangerous degree.." he confesses.
"you’re ours whether you like it or not. and it's not like we can find a way to leave here." jayce smiled softly, his large arms wrapped around yours and viktor's shoulders. he hugs you two close, not missing a moment to hold you both in his arms.
"i guess it was really meant to be when i said you're both stuck with me forever." you joked, kissing them on the cheek. "but we're really stuck here?"
after your kisses, viktor starts giving his share of kisses. "it would seem so. not that i'm complaining." jayce joins in on the sweet kissing session, making sure to give as much as he could before you or viktor start telling him to stop. echoing laughter rings out in the empty void. the cold of the astral plane could never make you shiver when you were with the men who did nothing but give you warmth.
"maybe we'll just reincarnate. do you believe in reincarnation?" you asked between kisses. they pause for a moment, contemplating your words.
"eh.. well, i'm sure it wouldn't be crazy to believe in reincarnation." viktor said with the slight tilt of his head, his look silently conveying his uncertainty but uncaring of it.
"if we do get reincarnated, i'll make sure to find you two before anything else." jayce whispered, his face firm with determination and love.
"that's so sweet. and sappy." you laughed lightheartedly.
the two men can't help but join in with their own laughter and just for a moment, the stars twinkle a little brighter as if joining in on the joy.
#arcane viktor x reader#arcane viktor#arcane jayce#lol arcane#arcane x reader#league of legends jayce x reader#lol jayce x reader#jayce league of legends#jayce x reader#lol viktor x reader#lol viktor#league of legends viktor#viktor x reader#league of legends viktor x reader#viktor league of legends#viktor x reader x jayce#jayvik x reader#viktor arcane#league of legends x reader
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⸻ ┊͙ the one where drew breaks up with angel !
warnings: angst, flashback to the argument is italicized, arguing over odessa, reader is sad asl 🩷 also angel x drew is not like a series, so it’s not like they’re broken up ‘forever’ ? if that makes sense. i just make blurbs based on random diff times during the relationship, it’s not like a set series where things are happening in order. hopefully that makes sense to someone 🧁 i kinda hate this. lmk yall
you don’t know how drew did it, how he put a smile on his face for the world to see when he broke your heart last night. was it possible that you really mean nothing to him?
scrolling on your phone looking at all the new pictures of drew at his premiere, he looked so happy. part of you hoped that he felt just as miserable as you did on the inside.
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“i mean really drew,” you threw your arms up in the air. “how many fucking times do i need to say i have an issue with her?”
“don’t start this bullshit again.” drew shook his head, you’d never heard him shout at you so loud before. “maybe if you could just have a simple conversation? instead of poutin’ and complaining? all you do is shut down when you’re upset. what am i supposed to do with that?”
you couldn’t even argue because you felt yourself shutting down, just like drew said you always did. “i don’t know what you want me to do.” you sounded so defeated, because you were. you weren’t sure how you were going to dig yourself out of this one. drew didn’t seem to be budging either, like he usually did.
“it’s the same thing over and over.” drew kept going, his temper didn’t seem to be slowing down. was this feeling pent up the whole time? “when have i ever shown you that i’m disloyal to you?”
never. he’s never shown that he’s disloyal to you. not once. "i don’t know! I just dont understand why you need her around when i’ve clearly shown that i don’t like her!” you rebuttled, unsure of anything else to say.
“because y/n, what don’t you get? she’s my fucking friend! she’s been around longer than you! you think i’m just supposed to fucking drop every woman i’ve ever been friends with just to make you happy?” drew got up from your pink fuzzy chair, the one he’s been sat on for the past 20 minutes while arguing with you. you hoped this wasn’t the last time he’d ever be sitting there. “this just isn’t working. i'm sorry” drew led himself out your dorm room, leaving you there crying.
drew hated seeing you cry, so much that he promised you that as long as you were with him, you'd never be left alone or upset, no matter how angry he was.
so, why did he leave you there crying into your own hands, hoping that this wouldn't hurt too much?
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so now, there you laid, on your dorm bed, in the same room drew left you. everything around you reminding you of him, all the stuffies he’d bought you, the pictures of you and him hanging on your wall, the flowers he surprised you with, sitting at your desk - looking right back at you, slowly dying away.
you opened your gallery, there were pictures of him from just two days ago, his eyes filled with nothing but love for you. what went wrong?
#⊹₊ works ⋆#⊹₊ blurbs ⋆#꒰ 𖥻 angel!reader ♡ ꒱#bookshelf#drew starkey#drew starkey imagine#drew starkey x reader#drew starkey x you#drew starkey blurb#drew starkey x female reader#drew starkey headcanons
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a ghosts graves
In the aftermath of a battle, Phantom, Batman, and Superman could be see talking between each other.
During a lull in the conversation a tiny girl comes running from underneath caution tape taped around the vicinity, holding a bouquet of marigolds between her small hands. She’s out of breath and seems to be embarrassed when she stands before the heroes, Batman reacts the quickest to the sudden encounter. Asking her about why shes here and what the problem is, he’s about to ask about her parents when she interrupts with “i have something for mister Phantom”.
Danny who had been only half listening was caught off guard, he looks at her and tries for a reassuring smile but his confusion must show through because she suddenly looks down shyly at her flowers.
“I heard from mommy that you put flowers on graves for people you like, ” she starts, “i don't know where yours is though, so i got you flowers to put it wherever it is”. She’s obviously embarrassed about interrupting, but she says the words with a form of determination. Suddenly what seems to be her mother comes running from out of the crowd.
“I am so, so, sorry for Miya, i didn't mean to loose sight of her, she slipped away, we’ll get out of your hair now. ” the woman says in a rush, gently tugging the child back from the slack jawed heroes. Danny can just make out her gently reprimanding the child for her behaviour when he suddenly steps forward. “Wait, wait, wait” he says quickly, crouching down to the child now hiding a bit behind the mother, “you got me flowers. . . so i can put them on my grave?” the tiny nod he gets from that has him smiling, “you wanted to put flowers on my grave?” is asked with excitement, gaining n even bigger nod in return.
He takes a small step forward, still crouched, and asks “are you alright with me hugging you?”, the nod lets him quickly move forward a spin the child around in a tight hug, laughing. He smiles brightly at the girl, holding her in his arms with enough space to make sure the flowers were safe, who is smiling back just as brightly. Danny laughs, “no ones ever given me flowers before! And you want them on my grave!” the actions have gained the attention of both civilians and other heroes, Danny could honestly care less though, someone wants to put flowers on his grave! Someone went through the effort of giving him flowers! He is so excited!
Both the mother, Superman, and Batman all look uncomfortable, “have you. . . never gotten. . ahem. . Flowers before?” Superman asks, “i mean, you look young so. . . have your parents never. . . ?”, the ending never gets finished but its definitely implied what he wants to really ask. Danny doesn't care, its not exactly important, right?
He looks at the heroes and says cheerily “i don't think my parents even know im dead!” before looking back at the child in his arms, not seeing all the shocked, pale faced staring( minus Batman, he never emotes, like, at all).
Eventually the kid has to leave due to dangerousness of the area, but not before a final hug and happy goodbye from Phantom after she hands the flowers to the undead hero. Danny says his goodbyes to the surrounding heroes, not understanding why they all look at him funny as he carries around the marigold bouquet before he flies off. He holds the flowers close to makes sure they dont get destroyed by the wind, but he cant help a few happy loops and twirls in his flight home.
The first ever flowers for his grave, how exciting!
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Ever since then the heroes and a few civilians make sure to give Phantom flowers each time they see him for his grave. Phantom is so excited people want to give him flowers each time a new set is given to him.
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wooooooo ok
i finally actually wrote something after so long, sorry for the long break between shit, stuff happened :/
sorry if there's any big misspellings or anything like that in here, i had an idea and wanted it down as fast as possible and i fucking ran with it as far as i could lol
y’all can continue this if you want, i just thought this idea was so cute
have a good night/day/afternoon/life
#my writing#dpxdc#dcxdp#dp x dc#dc x dp#batman#superman#danny phantom#danny fenton#the supers are horrified#lmao#so is that one random civilian#her child doesn't get it so shes safe from the horror#lol
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