#YEAH WELL IF I CAN COLLECT IT IM GONNA DAMN WELL TRY EVEN IF I DONT USE IT

[helpmyinterestsareverywhere]

oh MY god - I do NOT remember the Leviathan fight being this hard the first time I played?? Are you supposed to be able to beat it the moment you get the mission? Or am I just under-levelled?

Whatever - this fight is a problem for tomo- *looks at time* ...later today me

[ch3rryb0mb3rr]

Tldr; please put warnings on smut and have it below the cut and stop sexualizing minors in media. Especially if they just came out of middle school thats weird. Write what you want but tag and put warnings when needed.

--

I get so pissed when im going to read something about my favorite character, and it's smut WITH ZERO WARNING.

No 18+, no NSFW, no MDNI and it isnt even in the fucking tags. I dont wanna read that shit. Put the damned warnings there for the love of all that is green on this earth it takes two seconds. maybe a bit more, but if you could pump out 3.4k words of pure porn, I think you can handle a couple of tags and warnings

I am a minor, and i use those warnings, so I dont read straight-up porn!! I also dont need to read about incest accidentally because there was NO warning, and it was NOT in the tags!!

(And for those of you who do put warnings, i thank you and wish the best in life!)

(I am also well aware that a lot of people dont listen to dnis like that, but it's helpful for the people trying to avoid reading stuff like that)

Also, while im on the subject, let's not sexualize minors in media. Yeah their hot, i can see that. But i dont want to see the start of an NSFW alphabet for a 15/16 year old. Aged up my ass. Just put the beginning below the cut?? And not after the first four letters??

I do NOT need to know a fav characters preferred body part is the tits thank you very much. I definitely do not need to accidentally read that they wanna suck on it like a damned bottle.

--

'This character as your friend is soo perverted he wants to steal ur panties hehehe' NO HE DOESNT. HE'S A TEENAGER AND LIKES CATS. TF?? theres adults in the majority of the show that are reasonably attractive. Write that shit about them.

'Oh, they have this list of kinks,' and its shit only someone who has read hardcore smut would have. They are 16 and most probably haven't had sex because the creator cant give them a fucking break from trauma.

'He would be soooo toxic and blahblahblah [insert romanticised assault and abuse and trauma]' NO. that boy is my age and is a nerd. Motherfucker wants to study at princeton and has absolutely no flirting ability. You're only saying that because he's black, most of that shit reeks of racism.

--

These characters are kids, CHILDREN, and you as an adult (if you are one) should not be writing smut about them, aged up or not. You should not be thirsting over a sophmore when theres PLENTY of good looking adults that you can be.

Theres a difference in growing up liking a character and having a crush on them and growing out of it when you're an adult. And being an adult thirsting over a teenage boy. It's not cute. it's not 'oh, it's fine because he/she's not real'.

Its really fucking gross actually.

--

At the end of the day just tag your stuff correctly. That way its easier for everyone else to find EXACTLY what they wanna read. Because at this point im just gonna start reporting fics with no warnings at the beginning.

Someome younger than me with no parents looking through their devices could stumble on that, and not know what it means, read it, and be scarred for life.

I was reading that stuff way way way too earlier and its fucked up my mental state a bit so if we collectively start putting in the effort to help prevent this from happening to another 11 year old or younger than we should do so.

--

Start gatekeeping fandoms like creepypasta from young kids, start tagging shit correctly

Another child does not need to end up somewhat hypersexul with very violent intrusive thoughts by the time they hit high school because their parents wouldn't look out for them, and the fandom did NOTHING to try to prevent it.

Its not your job to parent the kid, and to look over their should. Thats not what im saying.

It IS your job to, again, tag shit correctly, put warnings for gore, bluring violent images, saying outright that a certain game/book/story/etc your recommending is NOT for kids due to its violent nature/sexual content/etc. Reporting accounts of children under the age limit for social media (i.e., a 10 year old with discord or instagram) (it is breaking the T.O.S)

Act like that one lgbtq+ chat room website I was on for a couple weeks where all the adults kinda looked out for me a bit. And supported me figuring out who I was and collectively riped a guy to shreds after I blasted him at a failed attempt to groom me. (And told me I had done exactly the right thing in this situation. Also, hi, if you know who I am from there!!!) (Story time if ya'll want I look back and think its the funniest thing ever how I dealt with him 💀)

[suffarustuffaru]

why the emilia camp thinks otto is their most threatening member 👍

i see some people being confused on why the emilia camp collectively seems to agree that otto is the biggest threat there for some reason and like. yeah. i get it.

but let me explain real quick why i think it makes sense for the emilia camp to think that :O !!

otto though is disarming because. well okay look at him he doesnt look threatening at all. he has the looks and personality of a wet cat. hes whiny. hes cringe fail. he gets stressed out with paperwork. he looks like you could just smack him around like a bug. he HAS been smacked around like a bug. but that makes him unpredictable because apart from roswaal, he is the Most Amoral one there. you can expect roswaal to be trying some shit, but youd never know when to expect otto is planning something. his moral compass is just “does this benefit me or my loved ones in some way? if not, then its gonna be gone 🥺”.

sure, he does nice things sometimes out of the goodness of his heart. he genuinely means well a lot of the time.

but also then you read the shit hes thinking in his internal dialogue and its like.

“should i go save some girl i dont even know from bandits??? hmm lemme think for a couple minutes. im the only one that can help rn… some guy claiming to be her dad is begging me to help his daughter, but also hes kind of annoying… but i dont even live in this city so why should i help… or Care. actually. but i feel kinda bad about this girl… but also this is gonna put me and my profits in danger… but if i reject helping then im forever gonna be known as the guy who abandoned them and then i wont be able to make any sales in this city anymore :<<<< ……anyway im gonna help them then lol im so smart.” and then he gets captured by the exact same bandits anyway so hes like “well okay now me and this girl might be sold into slavery so i might as well save both of us or ill feel bad ☝️☝️”

(yes. yes this is genuinely ottos thought process if you read through the Otto's Bittersweet Peddling Log side story.)

except all the back and forth Calculation he does in his head Stays In His Head and doesnt match up with his outward appearance most of the time. which means that sometimes his words dont match up with his actions. “dont be surprised if i leave at the first sign of danger,” he says, right after risking his life and writing a suicide note over a dude hes known for like four days. “ahah thanks for giving me a vacation to see my family…” he says, damn well knowing he cant go back home yet otherwise he’ll get sniped by assassins. “im gonna give you some of my own money bounty money to help you BUT BUT BUT DONT THINK THAT IM NICE OR ANYTHING I NEED MOST OF THE MONEY FOR REPAIRS OK YOU CAN ONLY HAVE A BIT :<<<“

this also means that whenever otto says or does something Particularly Questionable, all his friends are still kinda blindsided by it because otherwise otto seems Mostly Fine in comparison to whatever the hell everyone else has going on. hes just a wet pathetic cat of a guy ahah. theres nothing more going on with h—

“if everyone in vollachia dies but rem and natsuki-san live, then we’ve won. if everyone in vollachia lives but rem and natsuki-san die, then we’ve lost.”

um otto can you repeat that. what the fuck did you just say.

otto looks Mostly Normal, Just Stressed Out or Somewhat Chilling the vast majority of the time, and then he whacks you over the head with a steel chair. like can you imagine being garfiel and learning that this pathetic rag of a man is actually pretty brave when it counts. youre like “oh cool lol we kinda beat each others asses and i was Annoyed but now that thats all over i got some newfound respect for you!!” and then you read through his diary and hes got a suicide note in there, which is like. okay fine whatever hes kind of a clown just like my New Captain lol but hes dedicated to his friends, ill give him that. and then a year later you find your now brother figure (whos also lowkey highkey an alcoholic) with a broken hand after punching a wall because he couldnt do his Lets Abandon 50 Million People Plan and youre just sitting there going

and okay dont get me wrong—subaru is Batshit Crazy. in Multiple Incomprehensible Ways. if the emilia camp (or Anyone. At All.) knew about all the shit hes done and been through with rbd, subaru would INSTANTLY be skyrocketing up the Most Threatening People list. but at the same time subarus less threatening than otto in the sense that subarus Always going to want to do good. hes Always going to want to save everyone. hes Extremely forgiving, on top of that. he goes along picking up friends everywhere he goes in his own Incomprehensible Unhinged Way and hes fond of All of them.

otto? yeah his opinion of you could shift on a dime and you could end up in his personal shit list unless youre one of the *checks list* *clears throat* maybe like ten people he cares about. and even if youre on the I Care About You! :) list, he could still get pissed enough at you to, i dont know, punch a wall over you? and spiral into obsession? and even if hes not upset at you hes still gonna mansplain manipulate malewife his way to his goals <33

and yeah of course subaru is also Mansplain Manipulate and Gaslight Gatekeep but at least he has way more good intentions AND his attitude about it is gonna be like "sorry :<<< i just gotta do this for your sake :<<<<<< :((( haha dont worry about it". subaru would never ever want to do anything big to hurt his loved ones (except for rbd). while otto doesnt even bat an eye. everyone can be manipulated if he has to. he goes down his list of Things I Need To Do and goes "yeah that had to be done. oh well. anyway i got more shit to do (like maybe kill a toddler lol)"

also lets talk about roswaal's perspective really quick. post-arc 4 hes like "well subaru-kun is always gonna want to save everyone and hes doing a pretty good job of things in general so whatever lol. i can still keep him in check by killing everyone if even one of his friends dies :)". so its like. YEAH subarus an Unhinged Wildcard. roswaal knows that. but right now subaru is more predictable and also again, roswaal knows he can keep subaru in check by making subaru have to reset if roswaal really needs to.

but otto? yeah ottos second in line for being an Unhinged Wildcard. but whats even worse is that otto is Basically Subaru but More Calculating and with a moral backbone thats Near Nonexistent. roswaal was genuinely concerned for otto in arc 8 for once and there was still Literally No Stopping Otto from being a stubborn little shit whos hell bent on all the maladjusted insane mentalities hes got floating around in his head, half of which he doesnt even say out loud, and all of which he thinks is Completely Right and that theres Nothing Wrong with what hes doing.

and also otto being underestimated and Not In The Tome was a big help as to how subaru got the win over roswaal in arc 4 👍and then otto Continues to try keeping an eye on roswaal after arc 4, to the point of getting roswaal's tome and actively trying to investigate roswaal's actions, so roswaal is Very Aware that otto is. a bit of a threat. roswaal of course is smarter and more powerful than otto though, but that still doesnt change the fact that otto is still capable of being a threat if roswaal doesnt Also kind of keep an eye on otto back. because roswaal kind of lost to otto already in arc 4!!

but okay, on top of all of this, no one knows the full extent of whats going on with otto, not even roswaal (though he has his Suspicions), and most definitely not subaru yet (whos Still a bit of an otto apologist anyway), and otto is already a bit menacing even without knowing All of that. and the rest of the emilia camp are already a bit more lenient with roswaal (as hes seemingly chilled out after arc 4 + they all need him still). that, and you can easily Expect roswaal post-arc 4 to be suspicious and Probably up to something. you wont know what it is, but you wont Exactly be surprised when it happens.

and also roswaal isnt publicly batshit crazy like otto is. otto of course isnt as Openly Weird as subaru, but otto is still Openly Unhinged and Pathetic. just look at him declaring julius and anastasia, HIS CAMP'S ALLIES, as enemies right to their faces alsdfjlsdjfl.

and with subaru, there is Zero doubt in the emilia camp's minds that subaru wants the best for them and everyone around them.

otto though? yeah he also wants whats best for the camp. he Cares about them, he really does. but hes so obviously Questionable by the time you get to arc 8 to the point where the entire rest of the camp starts eyeing him like this:

theres also the fact that ottos dp allows him to have eyes and ears Everywhere so long as he doesnt overuse it. that paired with his Intelligence, Stubbornness, and Lack of Morals or self-awareness/sometimes guilt/regret over his actions is dangerous. theres a reason why gluttony if subaru decided to flood The Entire Surrounding Area Around Otto. the flood took away the potential army otto couldve made out of the animals and allies otto had in the city, and once you do that, whats otto going to do against someone like shaula? all of ottos power regarding his People Skills and Animal DP was stripped away.

but if that Isnt stripped away... well honestly otto can do whatever the hell he wants the moment he figures out a solid plan to try and get what he wants. his biggest ability at the core of what makes him dangerous is his ability to quite Literally be in the background. so long as hes underestimated, so long as he still has secrets, no ones gonna know the full extent of his bullshit!! you cant stop him if you dont even realize what hes going to do, and hes Good at doing that!!

and if gluttonybaru hadnt taken out otto, subaru would be skyrocketing right to the top of ottos shit list after subaru literally just killed All of ottos (and previously subarus.) loved ones. otto wouldnt stop until he figured out how to destroy subaru. its to the point where im pretty sure if otto had to choose between destroying half the world vs kill gluttonybaru once and for all, otto would certainly choose one of those options in a Heartbeat.

anyway. if youre an emilia camp member, and you see the dude whos in charge of the Vast Majority of the factions political affairs, the guy who you Know is very intelligent and competent and determined when it counts, say shit like "if everyone dies in this entire country i wouldnt even give a single flying fuck as long as our friends get back safe and sound :) it would be such a loss if the entire country lived but our friends didnt :<<<" OF COURSE I WOULD BE LIKE YEAH THAT GUY IS THE MOST DANGEROUS ONE HERE. HE HAS THE SKILLS AND THE MOTIVATION TO BACK UP THAT STATEMENT AND I WONT EVEN KNOW WHEN ITD HAPPEN. he also has the Mental Instability to back that up too, given the amount of times he spends drinking and Raging and Being Terribly Anxious over Every Little Thing.

youll be sweating buckets being wary of otto while ottos casually standing there with his wet cat looks and a knife in your back.

and otto has, for the most part, some of the most normal trauma compared to a bunch of people in this cast (not to discount ottos trauma and pain or anything but its true lajdsfls sorry otto. but also im not sorry because arc 5 was partially on you T^T). he doesnt have rbd, he doesnt have some weird family drama bullshit going on like the astreas or emilias family or the segmunts, he hasnt been erased by gluttony, etc etc. but hes still like this. if you put him in subarus position and gave him rbd, he would get even worse than he already is.

yeah so anyway thats my quick rambley psa about why i think it makes sense that the emilia camp's voted otto as the most threatening one there 👍

but the fact that we (the audience) (or at least some of us!!) keep questioning why the hell the emilia camp thinks otto is the biggest threat there is means that otto's funny silly guy image is. Kind of Working??? just a little bit.

because. granted. of course i think subaru is easily the most threatening person there with both His Flavor of Insanity and rbd. subaru is an eldritch horror in every single way. but at the same time - hes an eldritch horror who thinks friendship is the best magic of all T^TT !!! he FORGIVES PEOPLE WHO'VE KILLED AND TORTURED HIM. hes not threatening in this sense - the fact that hes kind of just way too nice in this sense!!! granted yes, he IS abusing rbd and Terrifying and Threatening in a multitude of ways, but i'd rather take my chances with mainbaru over main otto right now HAH T^TT at least subaru will apologize and start bawling his eyes out if he stabs some random innocent civilian and stranger in the gut for Some Necessary Reason!! otto would feel a bit bad and then completely Eradicate that feeling of guilt with "i had to do it. it was them or me so no regrets <3".

because otto..................... yeah otto is the Worlds Most Pathetic Yandere to his whole camp.

[alovesongtheywrote]

holy fuckin shit girl nighmare academia 🤌🤌🤌

thank god for that person who asked for a pt.2, but I must ask for a pt.3 loll

♥ Summary:  here you go, 1000 words of reid scheming against the reader with the help of some familiar faces! [Prof!Spencer Reid x GN-Prof!Reader]

♥ Warnings: morgan and garcia being morgan and garcia, vague mentions of spencer wanting kids, threats of bodily harm at the very end

♥ A/N: yeah, ik the last one of these came out like. today. but im having a lot of fun, so until that stops. have fun with the enemies to lovers professor au

♥ Word Count: 1200

Series Masterlist

♥♥♥

“Alright, my sweet brain boy, I’ve got the dirt on the Doctor- not you, the other Doctor.  You know what I mean.”

Spencer nodded- then he, in all of his genius, remembered that Penelope could not see him.

“What did you find?” he asked, pulling his legs up on his office chair.  He hadn’t left the university grounds after his fight with you and his call with Garcia.  You had left.  He was sure of it.  His office window gave him a great view of the parking lot, and hence, a great view of you leaving.  Reid, on the other hand, had stayed inside his office waiting for this second call.

“Well, it looks like you may have some competition in the doctorate department.  Doctor (L/N),” she stressed your title, “Also has three PhDs- one in criminology, one in law, and one in- get this- English Literature.  They’ve written a few really good articles, mostly on crime stuff, but also on Pride and Prejudice.  And oh, their takes on Elizabeth and Darcy- it’s enough to make a girl swoon.”

“Okay,” Spencer sighed.  None of this would help him get back at you- most of it was knowledge he could attain with a casual google search, “What else do you have for me?”

“Well, our dear Doctor is active in the community.  They help ex-cons get GEDs in their spare time, they donate to various charities and nonprofits, they support the local arts. They've got a lot of hobbies, they enjoy Halloween a lot- oh, and their mom is super proud of them.”

“What else, Garcia?”

“They have two cats, a couple siblings, a few nieces and nephews- it looks like they’re good with kids.”

“This isn’t relevant,” Spencer groaned, trying to hide his frustration.  He was looking for ways to get under your skin the way you had gotten under his.  He didn’t need to know every nice thing about you.

“Hey, you want kids, don’t you pretty boy?”  A deep voice that was very much not Garcia’s came over the line.

“Morgan is here, by the way,” at the very least, Penelope had the decency to sound a little embarrassed.

“I can hear that.  How long has he been listening?”

“Long enough to hear that you and this Mystery Professor would make a good match.  I mean, where else are you gonna find someone with three PhDs and a face like that?”

Spencer could hear Garcia’s gasp, even though she had pulled away from the phone.  When she spoke again, her voice was playful, “We’re looking for him, not for you.  What would Savannah say?  What should I say?”

“Easy baby girl, I’m just letting our boy know that I approve.”

“Hold on,” Spencer’s voice broke through the bickering of his former co-workers, “I think there’s been a misunderstanding.  I am not interested in (Y/N) (L/N).”

“Oh?  Then whyfore the background check, boy genius?”

“Is something wrong, Reid?”

“No, no, it’s nothing- it’s not like they’re a threat to my safety or anyone’s safety.  They’re just…”

“Just what, kid?”

Spencer drew in a sharp breath, trying to keep his cool.  He had to be calm- collected.  He couldn’t let Derek and Penelope know that you were so deep under his skin, inside the tissue of his brain, that he couldn’t stop thinking about you.  He couldn’t keep his mind from running back to the image of your face, glaring at him as you took the typewriter from his hands.  They would get the wrong idea.  The entire wrong idea.  So, Spencer had to remain cool.

He immediately failed.

“They’re just really fucking annoying, okay!?”

“Damn, kid!  Okay!  What did they do, tell you that Doctor Who was just okay?”

“No, you don’t get it-” Spencer hissed, flopping further into his chair as he proceeded to rant about the entire typewriter thing.  He quoted you word for word, too- of course he did, eidetic memory.  Once he finished, Morgan and Garcia seemed to take on a new understanding of the situation.

“I see!  This wasn’t a love call, but one for information!!  A stockpile of knowledge for devious pranks- that is why you called, right?  You need info for getting back at the lovely Professor?”

“Yes-!  They aren’t lovely, but yes.”

“Kid, anyone who can make you write emails is lovely in Garcia’s book.”

“Listen to your local Morgan, Reid- now, do you have a revenge plot already?”

“Sort of?”  Spencer shared his plans with Garcia, smiling to himself at the sound of her laugh.  His brand of humor didn’t usually get that reaction. 

“Sounds perfect, Reid- I can help with that, but I’m gonna need a secure connection, Dr. (L/N)’s email address, and everything you know about the benefits of handwritten notes.”

Once the plan was fully fleshed out, Spencer hung up the phone and finally, finally made his way out of his office with a rare spring in his step.  His plan was set.  The trap was in place.  Your beloved technology would be your downfall.  As he stepped onto the Metro, he had to keep from cackling like an overdramatic villain.  He was at a high point, and he really didn’t want to be arrested for causing a disturbance.  

Meanwhile, back at Quantico, Morgan and Garica looked at each other, the now silent phone placed between them.

“So, those two are-”

“They are perfect for each other, yes.”

“We’ve gotta help him.”

“Absolutely.  Hey, once they get together, do you think he’ll introduce me?  I want to talk to Dr. (L/N) about their Pride and Prejudice hot takes.”

“Careful, Garcia.  We’re shopping for him, not for you.”

“Hey, I just appreciate a person who can see the true nuances in one Fitzwilliam Darcy!  And I wanna know which film adaptation is their favourite.”

“Hey, lovebirds,” Rossi’s voice came from the door of Garcia’s office, “The rest of us have been ready to go for fifteen minutes.  What’s the hold up?”

“Nothing, Rossi.”

“We just found a perfect match for one Spencer Reid.”

“Really?  Interesting.  Tell me more later.  Let’s go.”

-

Two days later, you opened your PowerPoint slides only to find a presentation about the benefits of handwritten notes.  Everything you had in place for that day was gone.  All that was in its place was a genuinely well-crafted presentation about how writing notes by hand was better for attention retention and memorization.  

Honestly, you couldn’t even get that mad.  It was a good presentation.  

Still, you had a reputation to maintain.

You bit your lip and crossed your arms, becoming the picture of barely contained rage.  You took a deep breath, turning to your students and slapping a strained smile across your lips.

“Forgive me, my lovely students, but given this sudden turn of events, I’m just going to cancel class for today.  The correct notes will be on the class website later.”

You made your way to the door, leaving all your belongings behind in your haste, “Enjoy your afternoons, I’m going to go stab Dr. Spencer Reid.  In the throat.  Have a good day!”

A few students gave quiet, confused farewells.  Others leaned over to each other and whispered, “Stabbing is a sex thing, right?”

Technically, they were correct.

[aby55-of-the-ab5o1ute]

..

OH!? SO EVERYONES JUST GONNA WORRY ABOUT ME? NOT OUR SYSTEM, OR THE COLLECTIVE, OR ANYBODY ELSE!? HOW MY PARENTS MIGHT FEEL IF I HAVE TO GO, OR MY CHILDREN, OR MY SIBLINGS, OR LITERALLY ANYONE!?

IM NOT THE ONLY ONE HERE YOU CAN'T JUST IGNORE EVERYONE ELSE UNLESS THEY PRETEND TO BE ME OR SPAM VENT POSTS!!

AND YOU CANT EVEN GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ME PROPERLY

YOU DONT EVEN GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ME!

IM JUST A "COOL HOST" OR SOME SHIT!

Y'KNOW WHAT!? MAYBE I'LL JUST LEAVE! I'LL FORCE Y'ALL TO LEARN TO FUCKING LOVE THE OTHERS AND NOT JUST STAND AWKWARDLY OR IGNORE THEM BECAUSE "WELL I DONT KNOW THEM"

WELL YOU KNOW ME, AND I LOVE THEM! MAYBE TRY TO FUCKING GET TO KNOW US

I DONT WANNA KNOW YOU IF YOU ONLY GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ME

ESPECIALLY IF YOU DONT EVEN ATLEAST CARE ABOUT THIZZY

HE'S LITERALLY MY SIBLING

MY "TWIN"

WE ARE JOINED TOGETHER

WE ARE SEMI-FUSED

HE IS THERE FOR ME WHEN I NEED SOMEONE

HE IS THERE FOR ME WHEN I DONT NEED SOMEONE

HE TAKES CONTROL OF THINGS WHEN I CANT

HE TAKES RESPONSIBILITY AND PROTECTS US

WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO ANYBODY GIVES A SHIT ABOUT!?

AND WHY DO THEY NOT EVEN ACTUALLY GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ME!?

YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE WORK SO GOD DAMN HARD TO KEEP US AFLOAT

JUST IN OUR SYSTEM ALONE

THIZZY IS THERE WHENEVER I NEED TO GET OUT OF FRONT OR FRONT IS NEEDED TO BE OCCUPIED

VEEBEE HELPS ME GATEKEEP AND KEEP TRACK OF ALTERS BECAUSE I HAVE SO MUCH GOD DAMN STUFF TO DO

YEVA, NORI, AND KHAN PROTECT AND SOOTHE US

THATS ONLY OUR SYSTEM

AND ONLY JUST A FEW OF THE GOD DAMN PEOPLE

YOU DONT CARE ABOUT THEM

AND YOU CANT EVEN CARE ABOUT ME PROPERLY

STOP IGNORING THE PARTS YOU DONT LIKE

STOP

ONLY

CARING

ABOUT

ME

ITS SO AGGROVATING

SOMEONE WILL COME INTO FRONT WITH FRIENDS AND THEN LEAVE BECAUSE THEY EITHER GET IGNORED, OR TREATED LIKE THEIR ME

THEY MATTER TOO!

I GET IT, "YOU DONT KNOW THEM", BUT THAT DOESNT MEAN YOU GET TO IGNORE THEM

YOU KNOW US AS A COLLECTIVE

THEY'VE LURKED BEFORE

HELL MAYBE YOU DO KNOW THEM BUT THEY JUST PRETENDED TO BE ME BECAUSE THATS THE ONLY WAY THEY DONT GET SIDE LINED!

THE AMOUNT OF TIMES WE'VE HAD ALTERS COME INTO FRONT AROUND FRIENDS/FAMILY, SAY HI, MAYBE GET GREETED, AND NOT TALKED TO AGAIN OR IGNORED WHEN THEY SAY SOMETHING IS FUCKING ANNOYING!

THIS IS WHY IM THE MAIN FRONTER

WHY IM OVERWORKED

BECAUSE NOBODY CAN FUCKING GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THE OTHERS!

OH GOD AND ESPECIALLY MY DAD, KHAN?

HE NEVER FRONTS NOW!

I HAVE TO WHINE AND BEG FOR HIM

BECAUSE NOT ONLY WAS HIS FIRST EXPERIENCE BEING SIDE-LINED FOR HIS WIVES

BUT IT WAS ALSO HIM BEING COMPARED TO HIS SOURCE AND TREATED LIKE THE SCUM OF THE EARTH

AND SURE OUR FRIENDS NOW MIGHT NOT BE THAT BAD

BUT NOBODY FEELS WELCOMED!?

IM NOT EXPECTING A WELCOME PARTY AND A CAKE TO BE BAKED FOR THEM

IM EXPECTING FOR THEM TO BE TREATED LIKE FUCKING PEOPLE

And I can't even be cared about properly..

I'm ignored until I'm on the brink of fucking suicide.

or until I go directly to vent to people..

and when..

when I wanna rant about my family..

like.. in-system family..

i get ignored...

I talk about alters and then people sideline it

I talk about shit and then nobody cares

I'm tired..

you guys have made it so i never want to front again.

i don't want to speak to you guys ever again.

i don't want to be the host forever but nobody else is accepted so here I am.

thinking basically everyday "will this be the day I die?"

and most of the time its Thizzy helping me through it.

giving me the will to live.

its Nori helping me through it.

or anyone else.

so yeah.

i dont care right now about how terrible of a person I sound like.

We have been struggling for months with only our system being able to front for the most part because the other systems were forced out due to them not catering to what our friends/family wanted.

and now its getting worse.

now its turning into me being the only one able to front.

fuck this.

you guys made us feel like shit.

[vilf-lover]

okay my review of kenju audio 🙂‍↕️

now- no hate. kind of. i absolutely don’t condone or encourage stealing other peoples artistic visions and ideas and creations but also i don’t want to criticize some doing something that makes them happy. you get it.

first: telepath bf comforts you

excited and scared, very scared. geordi and james aren’t exactly in the best places right about now but this is not redacted audio…….

okay….he’s australian

NO HATE TO MY AUSTRALIAN BABES I WAS JUST THROWN FOR A LOOP

i can’t really explain how i feel about this. i’m um bored.

it’s very “i’m home. you suck. what’s wrong. you suck.” *extensive sigh*

where’s the flavor 😃

it’s giving early david but like not at all

he’s like more of a walking red flag believe it or not

so i’ve found the reason we’re being comforted he says “if they’re mean to you again” we getting bullied or what

“you’re my mess” brother wrap it up im so sorry but what

“you really shouldn’t let that stuff get to you- it’s a lot of bullcrap” 😐 okay

“you need to not care as much about what people think of you” that’s enough, this is not a pep talk

“just be yourself and that’s all you can ask for” i feel like im back in middle school at the inspirational seminars

“now are you done moping. LITTLE. BABY.” yk i can’t tell if david was this bad and im just more attracted to the idea of him or if this is just. dry. AND mean.

OH MY GOD AND ITS OVER ✊🏼✊🏼✊🏼

he wasn’t even supposed to be tsundere 😢

it was just boring, that’s really all. there was no background noise, stale line reading, very very scripted vibes (yeah i know the whole thing in this genre is a script you know what i meannnn)

i can’t even muster the courage to listen to the vampire ones because i’ll fight someone if i feel even a glimpse of sam-like mannerism

second AND LAST: tsundere werewolf has shifting trouble 😀😀😀😀

now part of me was trying to work with the benefit of the doubt and not think he was copying erik. this title within itself confirmed he is indeed. i’m not excited for this one especially after the last one.

no one can recreate my milo tho so this will be interesting

first second and i’m hearing grunting and i want to turn my phone off.

“go away, can’t you see i’m busy” get milo’s words out of your mouth

WAIT HES IN THE LIVING ROOM 😰😰😰

wait okay guys i’ve made a horrible lapse in judgement. he’s not having trouble shifting. he’s having trouble *not* shifting 😮‍💨 phew thought he was copying redacted but it seems like we’re all good

he fell down the stairs because he shifted randomly 😭😭😭

damn he’s mean

oh and it’s just his leg that’s shifting

i’m gonna go to sleep and this isn’t a sleep aid

OH HE USES THE SAME GROWLING SOUND EFFECT LMFAO 🐺🐺

OH WAIT THIS IS LIKE YOU GET BITTEN AND TURN

wow vamp x werewolf lore crossover

“i pride myself on my control with my shifting” well that’s a bit of a problem now isn’t it

“god knows i wouldn’t hear the end of it from lucas and i know i would just get speeches from nate” …right right right

ohhhh and he’s the beta ☝🏼

“and don’t call me puppy” oh???? wow we’re really just collecting character traits

i had to skip through the rest fairly quickly because i simply could not

AND WE ARE DONE.

@vegafan69 my professional review done 🤓

[httpiastri]

I kinda get what that the other anon means about Ollie seeming a little, fake (for a lack of a better word), at times.

I think it's because of that classic FDA PR training which in the words of Marcus Armstrong teaches you to "say a lot of words which mean a bunch of nothing".

Everything he says feels so sanitised, I feel like you never really get to hear any genuine, strong opinions from him.

It's really hard to explain it in words if you don't see it for yourself. I think it's more obvious if you compare him to other F2 drivers like Christian or Pepe, for example. They speak with so much conviction and don't seem to mince their words (whilst keeping things civil still) and you get such a strong sense of personality from them.

Tbh I'm not even sure if we can blame the FDA entirely for this because Dino is part of the FDA but I feel like his personality still shines through.

Prema's social media team is good at making Ollie break out of character at times but you can always see him trying to keep it cute still.

I feel like the closest we get to seeing his real personality is when he leaves comments on his family's SM accounts. Everyone views him as this well-behaved golden retriever but those comments show that he's actually quite sassy irl, he low-key seems like a menace (in the best way haha).

In a way I don't blame him for trying to maintain a certain image because people seem so eager to jump at any chance to cancel public figures these days.

I'm not gonna lie, part of it is also the cheating rumours for me. I don't consider cheating to be a trivial thing. It shows a real lack of character and integrity and I don't put anything past people who are capable of cheating. If people are allowed to be put off from Mini and Montoya because of their cheating rumours, then I don't see why it should be any different for Ollie. Of course, I don't think this should mean that people get to send any hate or abuse to the drivers but I don't blame them for side-eyeing them at least.

oh 100%!! we know how picky the fda is with their drivers and how they media train them. its funny how you used dino also because idk if i agree 100%? like i think he seems like such a funny dude but 90% of the time, he's holding all that back bcs of how he was brought up in the academy… he also seems "fake" in that way, esp when you compare clips of him from prema 2024 to when he was with paul in 2023 etc. but yes definitely letting more loose than ollie….. also thinking abt how paul has been very calm and collected in a media way but whenever he was with dino….🥹

lol yeah it would take a lotttt to hear a proper strong opinion from him… he aint gonna say anything other than "the car felt kinda bad but it’s okay 🙂" for at least a good while lol! and ofc no opinions on non-racing stuff like that….. god yes abt his sm comments, i saw a comment the other day that made me so "!! yes this is him!!!!" but now i cant remember what it was 🫠

but like yes as you say, i understand it 100%. damn its not easy to just "be yourself" without controlling your personality even as a "normal" person, so to expect a celeb who's got the entire racing world watching him to just be 110% himself without thinking about how he looks or what people think ?? that would be insane. all celebs do it, whether we notice it or not, so like 🤷‍♀️ plus he's still young, not even 20 yet….

yeah i get your point with the cheating… i agree with my entire heart, i have had this convo with friends before because i am not okay with people who cheat in any way (i don't see how it would even be possible that people do that?? it's so…. no i wont even think too much bcs im boiling already), so this situation has me kinda conflicted. obvs since there's no proof from anywhere, we can't properly know what happened. but in my mind, ebba (and maybe hermes) is way more reliable than estelle. like just… the amount of stuff going on around her, the rumors she starts and spreads… damn idk 😓 but i understand your point of it too!! i usually always support a girl who claims they were cheated on!!! it's just estelle i dont trust ig? :/

[lexa-griffins]

Clarke competes in a Halloween costume contest. Her costume is complicated to wear so she needs help to put it on. Cue Lexa who helps Clarke with her costume and that's how she discovers about Clarke's secret in her pants

Its a supergirl costume. Took some time to find a really good one that wasnt just some flimsy stretchy fabric or just a red skirt and a bidy but Clarke finally found one that resembles the full body suit Clarke wanted.

Except it is hell to put on. To be fair, Clarke has a lot more than Kara Danvers does to tuck inside the damn thing.

Its for a contest thought her friends signed her up for and because she cant help but be competitive, she is set on winning. And with a superhero team, she is sure to be set for success with this one.

If she can even put it on the right way first.

"Shit." Clarke curses as she realizes she manages to dress it the wrong way. Her makeup is done and if she keeps trying to squeeze herself into this thing alone she's gonna sweat it all off.

"Hey Lex. Could you help me with this thing?"

In comes her roommate. Hallowen is not her thing so while Clarke struggles to get inside her costume, Lexa leasures around in shorts and an oversized shirt

"You look ridiculous right now."

"Thanks, you're always so delightful. Please help me. Im struggling." Clarke whines as she gets the costume out and turns it correctly.

"Fine." Lexa sighs, seemimgly annoyed and snatching the costume from Clarke hands and staring at it. After its made clear Clarke's legs have to go in first, she motions to the bed, "sit down so its easier."

Clarke does as she's told. She sits on her bed in just her socks, sports bra and compression shorts. The latter felt more appropriate given she doesnt want a bulge to be visible on the costume. She'd rather keep that to herself.

Something that might be difficult now she realizes, as Lexa kneel in from of her on the floor, trying to get Clarke's legs inside the leg holes of the suit.

"This material is not forgiving. Jesus fuck." Lexa comments as she struggles to slide the tough and thigh fabric up Clarke's leg.

Her mouth is dangerously close to Clarke's crotch tho and Clarke has to close her eyes to bed her dick not to act up right now.

Not that she doesnt find Lexa insanely attractive but as it stands she is the best roommate she ever had and there is a small chance she might move out screaming is Clarke has a boner right by her face.

Shit. She thought of a boner.

"Hmm Clarke?" Lexa's voice is not alarmed but she does seem apprehensive.

Clarke whences, knowing damn well her dick is pressing hard agaisnt her compression shorts but refuses to look up, "Im sorry. I should have said something before."

Finally, she looks at Lexa, ready to see her looking at her in disguss. Instead her eyes are hooded and her mouth slightly opened as she stares at the bulge, "thats not gonna fit in the costume." She comments in a slow voice.

Clarke's breathing shakes, "y-yeah, it probably won't."

Its not a dream caused by dripping on her own feet as she tries to get the costume on Clarke is sure. Yet everything that happens afterwards does not seem real.

Lexa's hands on the band of her shorts. The gasp as she pulls them down and Clarke's cock jumps out, stiff against her stomach.

Lexa's hand wrapped around her shaft, soft skin moving up and down her length, causing pre cum to drip from her tip and Clarke groan at the feeling.

"Hold still." Lexa whispers as if Clarke is planning on going anywhere.

Plump lips wrap around her cock with ease, her toungue collecting the pre cum with one swipe. Clarke moves her hand to the back of Lexa's head, holding the ponytail she tied her hair in as she accepted to help Clarke. She lowers herself slowly onto Clarke's dick, taking a second between each inch of dick before she gets half way through her lenght and cannot take anymore. She comes up for hair like she's been underwater and all clarke can do is stare at her in amazement. She looks absolutely gorgeous like this, cheeks red, eyes watery, spit in the corner of her lip.

"Lexa you dont have to-"

"It wont fit in it." Lexa tells her sternly. If she means the costume or her mouth Clarke will never know because Lexa is on her feet again, discarding her shorts and underwear on the floor and climbing on top of Clarke.

They should talk about this. Clarke just needed help with a damn costume. And now she's looking as Lexa aligns her dick with her entrance, feeling as she lowers herself down on to Clarke's dick with ease until Clarke is fully buried inside of her.

"It fits." Lexa chuckles.

It sure does. Thight but like a damn glove.

Lexa rides her with gusto, and Clarke cums faster than she thinks she has ever done in her life.

She's still dripping Clarke's cum when she lowers herself down to clean Clarke with her mouth.

Clarke is barely aware of the costume being fully pulled up and closed before shes staring st herself in the mirror.

Lexa's face pops up in the reflection behind her as she finishes closing the zipper, "a little thight, but like a glove."

[scorchrend]

if u would like to share ur marx thoughts…… and make us all feel physically ill alongside u…….. this random anon is very much interested in hearing 👀👀👀

thats the problem istart feeling physically ill because i cant verbalize what i'm thinking it;s that bad. but since you asked this might be the push i need. UHHHHH marx thoughts. what are my marx thoughts it's like rummaging through my junk clearbook where everything is just placed anywhere and everything gets lost i do answer better and more coherently with specific questions.. btw.... hehe. Love Questions okay. random thoughts go

marx is a really attention seeking guy. thrives out of getting a rise from other people. pre super star though, i don't think he has any real friends despite being a common sight due to his tricksterisms and funny things. i don't think he's done this in canon really, but personally i like to make it so that marx used to work under dedede. you know. big castle, you think it has cool stuff, should give pretty good benefits to staff right? but then kirby's dream land happens and hes like Bro this Sucks and skedaddles. so yeah no meaningful relationships

i like the idea that marx is friendly with kirby pre kirby super star, but i don't think it's a relationship that can really be described as "friends" more than "staying on good terms and excitedly saying hi whenever you see each other, have a little small talk, and go separate ways." i mean, to kirby, they're friends. i don't think marx knows this when he asks kirby for help in milky way wishes, he's relying on kirby's helpful nature the trust is just kind of a bonus. as for why marx soul is like that i dont fucking know man these are random ass thoughts

thing is i think marx genuinely thinks kirby's a cool stand up dude especially after kirby's dream land but i think he just got Sooo Fucking Pissed thats why mww happens or whatever but i'm not sure either since i'm just spitting words. whatever his reasons are they always change in my head, marx is an enigma to me Even as a local marx enjoyer

as for his relationship with magolor it's the average They meet after Marx Blows Up and magolor is in the area and like Damn well i'm not gonna leave that guy out there am i. then bla bla friends (menaces) and puts the idea of nabbing that crown from landia. less of an intentional thing you know, but even if marx blew up he still kinda had something to show for it you knoe. the wings and the nova power. i can't say why they'd part ways (i don't know either) but basically before that they enjoyed some weird shit like pranking randos maybe Way Too Hard

anyways, after they part ways, marx probably goes planet hopping for a bit but eventually settles back on popstar. guys got the wanderer bones in him but i really think he thinks life on popstar is swell. he wanted to rule it for a reason i guess?? also the nearby planets he can fly to are Pretty Empty. I think.i actually genuinely don;t inow what im saying though im making a lot of this on the spot

reason for thinking marx has been hiding out on planet popstar: he's readily available in kirby star allies from the first dream palace. i know the dream rod summons them but like for my purposes i think it's just kinda like YOU. COME HERE.

okay but you know who else is in wave 1 that's right rick kine coo and gooey. i think they become friends. i think they're marx's first real friends (if you count them becoming friends while marx is disguised? they keep it up even after they find out. trying to be the kirby they want to see in the world or something.) like i got a little idea where its kinda like Damn i kinda wanna Fuck Up Everything but then he experiences laughing With people and not just Laughing at or Being laughed at and is like Fuuuckkk this is kindasick actually. UGH plans POSTPONED!! he is still 100% a shithead though these improvements dont really happen until marx drops his disguise after he meets magolor again (between rtdl and dream collection)

as for marx and magolor's reconciliation i feel like it's really smooth at first while magolor recovers from an arduous warp or whatever but when magolor starts showing discomfort at the ... hobbies marx has there starts to be tension because marx starts feeling like magolor is ignoring him and doesn't want to associate (even if magolor does want to keep being friends). however they deal with that is still up in the air but it required a lot of arguing, magolor apology to the dream team, marx blowing his "presumed dead" cover just to cover for magolor on something, etc. stuff that shows both parties really value their friendship even after they've changed and paths diverged quite a bit. fyi their arguments are so fucking bombastic because they WERE so SIMILAR that any insults they toss at the other is a double edged sword, and evidences some kind of self loathing

for marx's relationship with kirby i honestly think they're chill. but ofc marx exasperates kirby at times.

also marx has to get hisinfo from somewhere so i think he does in fact read stuff. only stuff interesting to him but he does read and when he does he Reads reads. thats how the Loser hatched his plan regarding nova anyways. somehow taranza finds outabout this and hes like Oh my god someone who understands media. Marx vehemently denies this (but cannot resist screaming at other people who have shit takeaways from x book he likes) (Marx has opinions on notoriously polarizing character Eon based on historical figure Aeon Hero) (not anything i consider important just something funny)

i could go on forever but for now i think my brain is all worded out. not even sure if any of this makes sense. here you go anon. enjoy.

[pesterloglog]

Dave Strider, John Egbert, Jade Harley

Act 6, page 6302-6323

DAVE: so weird being back here

DAVE: cant believe how long ago it feels since i lived in this place

DAVE: spent way too long wallowing in our own filth on that gnarly meteor thats for sure

DAVE: this doesnt even seem like my room anymore

DAVE: its like trespassing or something like im horning in on somebody elses life

DAVE: a life lived most sweetly though i will admit

DAVE: ahahaha the fuckin toilets still there

DAVE: i remember when jade put that there that is perhaps like my favorite memory

DAVE: wish jade wasnt crazy just makes me remember how much i miss not crazy jade

DAVE: or less crazy jade

DAVE: wait

DAVE: didnt karkat once say terezi ripped a troll toilet out of his house

DAVE: what is with girls and their universally constant tendency to rip out plumbing fixtures

DAVE: did i just accidentally crack another cosmic riddle or

DAVE: i gotta txt him and get confirmation on this asap

DAVE: actually nah

DAVE: i probably harangued the poor guy with enough of my bs the last few years

DAVE: ill just keep shufflin thru memory lane making wistful observations out loud

DAVE: you know it kinda chaps my bulge that people rip on me for talking to myself

DAVE: its like the most perfectly natural thing to do

DAVE: why are people so up tight about keepin a lid on their monologues what a bunch of stuffy pricks

DAVE: ive always found the sound of my own voice to be mysteriously soothing

DAVE: haha talk about an embarrassing sentence to say in earshot of an actual person

DAVE: well maybe not the mayor

DAVE: you can always tell the mayor anything <3

DAVE: hahaha this piece of shit is still here too

DAVE: didnt we use this thing like ONCE

DAVE: what a useless pile of trash in hindsight

DAVE: sometimes i think this game was designed by an idiot

DAVE: wasnt it called like

DAVE: the laserbeam intellivision or something

DAVE: id throw it in the lava but that would be a waste of melting

DAVE: oh yeah

DAVE: almost forgot about my ill beats from the past

DAVE: i wonder if theyre as ill as i remember

DAVE: ok i just pushed some buttons and verified they remain as ill as the day they were dropped

DAVE: ill have to send them to karkat he has always been an enthusiastic patron of my exceptional science

DAVE: i mean sure he says it sucks and maybe he even believes that on some pathetic sub intellectual plane of consciousness which gross philistines operate on their whole lives

DAVE: but whenever he gets a load of my hype

DAVE: i see him there

DAVE: tapping his foot ever so slightly

DAVE: i see him

DAVE: this poster...

DAVE: love this poster

DAVE: its like an old friend

DAVE: never even knew who these guys were or what their deal was

DAVE: never gave it much thought i guess

DAVE: doubt ill ever find out at this point

DAVE: oh well

DAVE: some things i guess were never meant to be figured out

DAVE: or benefit from any kind of elaboration

DAVE: not even years later

DAVE: just the way it is sometimes

DAVE: its like ive said before

DAVE: this poster is a hell of a mystery

DAVE: that i never even thought was a mystery

DAVE: and it would be pretty cool if somebody solved it

DAVE: but damn if thats ever gonna happen

DAVE: so thats a shame

DAVE: aw hell its my old dead things collection

DAVE: what a stupid blast from the past

DAVE: i seriously cannot remember if i was sincere with this shit

DAVE: i was probably trying to flex my underdeveloped irony muscles

DAVE: like the shrimpiest kid at the hipster gym

DAVE: why does my childhood room have to be such a predictable museum of embarrassments

DAVE: i dont know

DAVE: some of these things are kind of cool actually

DAVE: like from a standpoint of objective reevaluation afforded by the sobering maturity that comes with being literally 100% grown up now

DAVE: dead things are actually pretty rad

DAVE: i feel like if i was legitmately into all this then more should have come of the interest

DAVE: like there could have been like

DAVE: entire CONVERSATIONS about it that never even took place

DAVE: hey rose youll never guess what im excited about and have loads of dialogue to spill over

DAVE: whats that dave

DAVE: ancient mollusks

DAVE: hmmmmmmmm said rose

DAVE: how many bananas do you think this paw clutched back when it was alive and attached to a monkey

DAVE: dave i really must say

DAVE: this conversation blows

DAVE: yeah sorry

DAVE: maybe i could have really developed this interest

DAVE: maybe i could have been something cool as a result

DAVE: like what even profession is this

DAVE: a dead shit ogler?

DAVE: no wait

DAVE: probably a paleontologist or something

DAVE: i could have been a paleontologist

DAVE: instead of what i became

DAVE: which was

DAVE: uh

DAVE: some pajama packing fuckface from the renaissance fair

DAVE: that would have been the dopeness!

DAVE: eurgh

DAVE: the ironic selfies

DAVE: oh god

DAVE: now this

DAVE: this is some irredeemably mortifying shit here

DAVE: what was i thinking

DAVE: i dont know man

DAVE: i just dont know

DAVE: this is what seasoned veterans call "bad irony"

DAVE: look at this guy

DAVE: what a fucking novice

DAVE: oh who am i kidding

DAVE: i cant stay mad at that face

DAVE: ok this one is pretty funny actually

DAVE: ...

DAVE: eheheh

DAVE: hehehehe

DAVE: haha!

DAVE: hahahahahaha!

DAVE: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

DAVE: WHY

DAVE: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

DAVE: (gasp)

DAVE: WHY CANT

DAVE: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

DAVE: WHY CANT I STOP LAUGHING

DAVE: PFFFFAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

DAVE: YOU WIN!

DAVE: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

DAVE: YOU WIN YOUNG DAVE

DAVE: THESE SELFIES ARE COMEDY GOLD

DAVE: AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

JOHN: hi dave!

JOHN: what's so funny?

DAVE: whoa

DAVE: john

JOHN: what were you looking at there...

JOHN: hey, are you crying?

DAVE: what

DAVE: no

JOHN: ...

DAVE: i mean i was just laughing too hard at something dumb

DAVE: you know how it is

JOHN: heh, yeah.

JOHN: can i see?

DAVE: no its nothing

DAVE: where the fuck have you been

DAVE: do you remember what happened since we got here

JOHN: yes.

DAVE: well

DAVE: are you gonna fill me in or keep floating there in the most uninformative way possible

JOHN: uh oh.

JOHN: dave, i have to go!

DAVE: what

DAVE: why

JOHN: i can't hang around in one place for too long.

JOHN: let's catch up later, ok?

DAVE: john wait

JOHN: see you buddy!

DAVE: no dont

DAVE: john no stop turning into wind you fickle idiot

DAVE: dont just leave right away that is such an insanely predictable move

DAVE: i said get back here you slippery motherfucker!!!

JADE: hello dave

DAVE: god dammit

JADE: he was just here wasnt he

DAVE: no

JADE: how do you even know who im talking about??

DAVE: look all i know is egbert most definitely didnt just appear out of nowhere and catch me weeplaughing at my selfies

JADE: dave i know he was just here

JADE: i can smell him

DAVE: i keep my apparment misted with his odor at all times

DAVE: essence d'egbert

JADE: degbear?

JADE: what...

DAVE: no like the french pronunciation

JADE: ah

DAVE: anyway im just a lot more comfortable when my whole place reeks of nerd musk

DAVE: so that explains that

JADE: you cant fool me dave

JADE: i will track him down sooner or later

JADE: in any case it doesnt matter

JADE: i came here to see you, not him

DAVE: you did

JADE: come with me

DAVE: where

JADE: out here

JADE: we have some work to do

DAVE: what work

JADE: youre going to need to upgrade your weapon

DAVE: what

DAVE: you mean the deringer

JADE: yes

DAVE: i thought it was like the best possible sword

DAVE: or at least the best possible broken sword

JADE: that may very well be the case

JADE: but it will be useless against lord english

JADE: wouldnt you prefer a weapon that is capable of inflicting damage against him?

DAVE: uh

DAVE: not really?

JADE: of course you would

JADE: this isnt even up for discussion

JADE: now give me the deringer

JADE: we have all been traveling for three long years. what better way to celebrate our reunion than with a little alchemy? :)

DAVE: lots of ways

DAVE: we could have a jade goes back to normal party

DAVE: starring normal jade

JADE: HAR HAR

JADE: gimme the sword

DAVE: ok here

DAVE: how do we make it so it can damage him

JADE: it needs a special ingredient

JADE: something which represents his only known weakness, but hasnt been properly weaponized

DAVE: and you know what that is

JADE: i do

DAVE: how

JADE: i get all my intelligence on such matters from the old lady

JADE: shes had centuries to hatch a plan to settle her score

JADE: over time shes uncovered many secrets about him

DAVE: i dont understand how this is working

DAVE: is she piping all these secrets into your brain

DAVE: along with the evil

JADE: that is not relevant!

DAVE: fair enough

DAVE: i guess technically almost nothing is relevant to the dude youre barking orders to

DAVE: literal barking because of dogginess

JADE: bark bark bark!!!

DAVE: yes exactly like that

DAVE: thank you for participating in the joke

DAVE: now what is this special ingredient and where do we get it

JADE: i already have it right here

DAVE: oh yeah?

JADE: in fact ive had it for about as long as i can remember

JADE: it was right under my doggy snout all along

JADE: remember this?

DAVE: no

JADE: dave are you lying to me?

DAVE: no!

DAVE: ive never seen that thing before

JADE: but i found it on your planet

JADE: it must have gotten here somehow

DAVE: i didnt take your lousy egg

JADE: its not an egg!

DAVE: yeah well these planets are crawling with brainless lizards maybe one of them thought it was an egg

DAVE: and then brought it here cause its warm here and tried to hatch it

JADE: you really have a one track mind when it comes to certain things

DAVE: what things

DAVE: what are you talking about

JADE: davesprite was like that too... i just figured it was because he was part bird

JADE: but no, here you are going on about bird things too just like him :p

DAVE: come on dont compare me to him

DAVE: just cause i think its an eggy looking thing dont mean i think like a damn bird

JADE: mm hmm

JADE: and just because i have these pointy ears doesnt mean i wouldnt kill for some snausages right now!

DAVE: .....................

DAVE: do you actually want snausages

JADE: .....................

JADE: maybe ._.

DAVE: ok well snausages notwithstanding this is bullshit

DAVE: tell me how that thing doesnt look like an egg to you

DAVE: how is that not so obviously SUCH an egg???

JADE: its a cueball dave!

DAVE: i see

DAVE: so if im following

DAVE: then what youre trying to tell me is

DAVE: lord english has some sort of severe egg allergy that we are hoping to exploit

JADE: sigh

JADE: i see its still impossible to have a serious conversation with you, whether you are a sassy bird or not

JADE: i thought regular dave might have matured a little over three years but i guess i was wrong

DAVE: can we just make the eggsword already

DAVE: oh no

DAVE: not the legendary piece of shit again

JADE: pardon?

DAVE: its the fuckin welsh sword again!

JADE: are you telling me you have seen this sword before dave

JADE: how is that possible?

DAVE: i dont know!

DAVE: because i have a shitty quest is how

JADE: .....

DAVE: didnt davesprite tell you anything

DAVE: i found this sword in a gold cave and broke it

DAVE: then davesprite took it to hephaestus who fixed it and upgraded it to the deringer

DAVE: and sent that to me and i broke it again

JADE: you sure seem to break swords a lot

DAVE: i know!!!

DAVE: that has always been my thing for some reason

DAVE: now i guess it turns out my ultimate sword is really just a repaired downgrade of my previously ultimate sword mixed with a cueball?

DAVE: we just cycled right back to caledfwelsh like a bunch of tools

DAVE: that is the most stupid convoluted ass backward way to get a sword out of a stone i can even imagine

DAVE: i feel like somebody somewhere is having a good laugh over this i sure hope like the juggalo equivalent of fuckin loki or whoever the fuck is having a top notch riddlewank at my expense

JADE: :|

DAVE: you know what really gets me is

DAVE: this shitty welsh sword presumably consisted of those ingredients all along which just makes me want to travel back in time to perform a mutually assisted suicide with myself

DAVE: me and other dave can take turns suffocating each other with our own DUMBASS capes

JADE: dave i admit this is a peculiar turn of events, but i think you are overreacting

DAVE: jade this is STUPID

DAVE: my quest is a STUPID PIECE OF GARBAGE QUEST for LAME SHITTY LOSER FUCKHEADS WHO SUCK BALLS WHILE CRAPPING THEIR PANTS

JADE: omg

JADE: youve really spent way too much time alone with karkat havent you

DAVE: ...

DAVE: i need help :(

[aubzikins]

Alaskan Darkness Ch 3: Writer's Collective Discord Shenanigans Pt2 (April 11th)

Writers Collective Discord – Chaotic-Main:

Aubz: Okay so here’s the deal… I love that y'all used the fic discord names as y'all's name but its too much. I made nicknames for each of you so we know who is who and I don’t have to use my brain more than I already have to…

Hwa: Oh? Ooo Nice and short, I like it Aubz.

HJ: HJ? That’s all I get?

Sangie: Haha I got a cute one :P

Aubz: Ok so I need updates, what’s going on.

HJ: We are preparing to head up your way.

Aubz: Okay, we have houses prepped for you all, *inserts address and sends map directions* The house that I have marked as a star, that will be where we in-process everyone. I have winter gear for everyone as well. With the way the weather patterns have shifted. We may need to prep for a longer cold season.

Hwa: More snuggles will be needed then…

Rayne:  AUBZ WILL SNUGGLE YOU ALL YOU WANT HWA!!!!!!!!!!!!

Aubz: Rayne… Have I told you how much I hate you lately?

Rayne: Love you too Aubz!

Bella: Now now children…

Chan: This is like our personal group chat between the kids and I *laughs*

Aubz: OMG I cant with any of you right now. Ok, what else has been going on.

Chan: Ahh so… Aubz.. We have read all of your guys’ fics by the way

Aubz: …

Aubz: *Dies Dramatically gif*

Jennen: Check our chat…

HJ: Naughty having your own chat…

Writers Collective Discord – WC OGs:

Jennen: So… Jinnie is trying to seduce Rayne, Chan likes multiple of us, They have read all of our fics, I got Lixie cuddles, Jisung has been cuddling Rah, Binnie is in love with Shai, Minho and Bella… Eliza has been on a rescue mission and will be heading our way, the kids and pirates have read everything we have ever posted in this server as well

Aubz: WAIT… Bella and Minho what? You're just not gonna skip past that and not elaborate..

Jennen: I don’t know for sure, but they have been spending a lot of alone time together.

Aubz: BELLA! DID YOU GET TO SLEEP WITH MEOW MEOWS?????????

Bella: First of all no… I do get to sleep next to him but not with him… I also slept next to Rah and our emotional support Quokka.

Aubz: OH HELL NO *Storms off to main chat*

Writers Collective Discord – Chaotic-Main:

Aubz: LEE MINHO!!!!!!!!!! YOU GOT SOME EXPLAINING TO DO.

Minho: Sorry don’t understand English…

Aubz: You are such a damn liar Lee Minho. YOU HAVEN'T FUCKED BELLA YET???????????

Chan: *inserts popcorn meme*

Aubz: CHAN DON’T YOU EVEN START BECAUSE I OWE YOU A GIBBS SLAP TOO WHEN YOU GET UP HERE.

Chan: What did I do!?

Aubz: You don’t think I know about your shenanigans? You are sorely mistaken.

Lixie: *peeks in*

Aubz: If you don’t get your shit together Minho, I am going to sick San after Bella. Im sure he can get the job done.

San: Wait what?

Bella: …

Minho: What the fuck Aubz?

Aubz: It’s the end of the world basically and none of us knows who's gonna live or die… so fuck and be happy

Bella: Aubz... I'm never going to tell you anything ever again… Also why are we summoning a pirate when I have plenty of options between the homeless children

Aubz: Yeah yeah yeah… I give it 5 minutes… or until one of them fucks you.

Rayne: *laughs in OT8*

Hannie: Homeless children?

Rah: Just wait until we get up there Aubz…

Minnie: *watches the shenanigans*

Innie: Is this how she is all the time?

Shai: *inserts popcorn gif*

Mingi: What in the world is going on?

Jongho: Mayhem

San: So Bella…

Bella: Sir… I don’t have time to deal with a pirate… I have homeless children to attend to first.

Hwa: Ill take care of Aubz when I get up there.

Aubz: I think the fuck not! I am gonna yeet myself to a Polar Bear.

Rayne: I think the fuck yes!! YOU NEED SEONGHWA LOVINS!

Bella: IF YOU ARE GONNA THROW ME UNDER THE BUS THEN I'M GONNA DO THE SAME TO YOU… Jongho, Hongjoong and Seonghwa… Aubz is down bad for all of you…

Aubz: *shocked pikachu face gif*

Bella: Get wrecked Bitch *inserts tongue face* And San? Minho wants to talk he says.

Hwa: *is confused* I thought… *inserts a sad face*

Jennen: Wow Aubz… after all these years… you finally get a chance and you are saying you’d rather yeet yourself to a Polar Bear than be with Seonghwa?

Eliza: WTF is going on in here…

Trixie: Chaos… just Chaos…

Rah: Aubz is so fucked.

Kel: Aubz, behave.

Aubz: IM BEHAVING!

Kel: Aubz…

Bella: HAHAHAHA

Rayne: You are NEVER behaving Aubz…

Eliza: Oh Aubz…

Chan: Aubz are you okay?

Binnie: I am gonna go snuggle Shai…

Lixie: This is so chaotic… I love it!

Aubz: Hwa… I'm sorry for saying that I will yeet myself to a Polar Bear *inserts a groveling gif*

Kel: Good girl…

Rayne: *keyboard smashes*

Hwa: I forgot that Kel seems to be the only one who can get you to behave.

Kel: She gets a little ahead of herself sometimes Hwa. Please be patient with her.

Hwa: *inserts nodding gif*

[dorkicon]

i reached taglimit. readmore contains ^that

yeah anyway point is no one is free from sin etc etc. and if jesus was real hed be a punk ass bitch bc he apparently refuses to smite these guys on the spot

the whole damn thing was infuriating. the part in the book that talks about sex was, as far as i can tell, like, a chapter. if that much, but everyone was up there comparing it to human trafficking, to grooming, to sexual assualt

like the sheer flippancy with which that was thrown around-- well if this library sees fit to have this in their collection, its obivous theryre trying to groom children because it was on display!!!

(it was not, and even if it was, the display is closest to our paperbacks and audiobooks, by like 20 feet if not more. our teen section is behind even our paperbacks, alllll the way in the back corner. our childrens section is in the very front of the library. even farther away from our display. a child would have to go way out of their way to even think about reading one of these books)

an adult watching their child or teen would have say in what they read, in the sense that we do not allow anyone under 18 to get a card. a parent has responsibility. if they dont like what their kid is reading, then thats their fucking issue, not ours.

^im aware that that has its own pitfalls, and would indeed make it hard for a gay teen to read freely if they have homophobic parents. i didnt say it was always a good thing. its just the policy we have.

tangent over. i had to stand there watching people go up there and air their grievances. some guy pretending to cry as he quoted the bible about how fags are corrupting the kids. an old man yelling about how theyre giving babies mastectomies (lol?) a woman who saw fit to let us know that she had a trans daughter and she thought our director should be fired for having this book in the collection some guy who for some reason went on a tangent about how, like, they/them pronouns arent real, which like, idk man. like-- like...? otay pick a struggle

and all of this is just to say that...even though its easy to joke about, its easy to call these ppl ignorant assholes who talk a big game while not understanding anything about ANYTHING its also like. scary lol. bc i guess theyve won in some regard

like our director is leaving at the end of this month. and i cant say i blame her. i was mad and hurt w how she reacted...in retrospect i guess i was mad at the administration in general. not just our director, but the board, and how easily they capitulated to taking the display down two years in a row. i have no idea if the board asked her to, or if shes stepping down willingly. its not my business but i guess i wouldnt be surprised.

and well. frankly, its scary. the board had someone lined up who had zero experience, someone who would make sure we got less fag books, who would make SURE we dont have another pride display. idk if theyll be a director or a board member, but it isnt pretty either way.

the fact of the matter is that under her our library has expanded into tons of extra community outreach. networking w the senior center, the heritage museum, building a food pantry and stocking it, giving out lunches and dinners to kids, providing a place for homeless people to stay without getting fucking hassled. its...a lot, that i dont know will be kept under new leadership yknow

and some of us are talking about leaving, and...well, that sucks too. it really does, because were generally open minded folk, sans the libertarian and the one who is apparently the son of the far right lady who...mentioned him telling her all about how we ran things here in her speech so. lol.

i dont know. i guess the point is that its scary. and i think ive put too much of myself into that stupid fucking library because ive been mourning it i guess. mourning what were gonna lose, what it may turn into. i dont know. something. all over a passage about gay sex in a book yknow.

and ppl are getting real brave about their transphobia and their fearmongering. you give them an inch theyll take a mile yknow. and once this blows over and theyve disrupted and uprooted this fucking community center theyll move on, because they never gave a shit about the library or any of our books or anyone who works here or even the kids they claim to protect. theyre empty, empty people fueled by righteous anger over the boogeyman of the week and the queers just happen to be an easy target.

bitching abt my job again

tags contain frank mentions of transphobia and homophobia

[sailorhyunjinz]

SKZ SHORT REACTION TO YOU ALWAYS CRYING , WHINING , AND RUBBING YOUR FACE INTO THEM DURING SEX 😭🥺🥺 CUTE FDDFFGG

It just always feels so good and overwhelming to have fat cock inside of your tiny pussy 🥺

Also ilysm <33 hry ?

-🐈

KITTEN! how are youuu~? i’m doing just fine, thank you for asking ^^

also... wish i could relate but do i get dick? no, none. ASHAHSHSA

OK QUICK REACTION (aka cherry word vomits) LEGO

warnings; dom!skz x gn!reader, dacryphilia, explicit sexual scenes, slight impact play, moaning, sex (well no fucking shit), orgasm,,, uh what more,,

before starting lemme just say this; as a collective THEY LOVE IT, EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM LOVES IT but sure... some more than others 

Bangchan

nah mate you got him whipped 

W H I P P E D

just imagine holding him close and rubbing your face against his muscles while he’s just going at it OH LORD-

he already likes being in control

and when you show that you are weak in the presence of this dominant aura it just boosts that aura tenfolds.

i dont think he’d go as far as to see you cry but like tear up yk?

but BRUH HE LOSES HIS SHIT WHEN YOU’RE CLINGY

your toes curling as you try to move away from his touch, him already beginning on your fourth orgasm that night

you try to hold on to anything which is most likely his broad shoulders (oop drooling a bit)

DUDE HAS THEM GUNS TO BE ABLE TO MANHANDLE YOU WITH EASE

which he does... a lot 

but he would always ask if you felt comfortable and would remind you to use the safeword because caring dom shit 

whine his name and BYE- he cums

would ask you to say it louder

“let everyone hear how good im making my baby feel”

Minho

SKSKASK all of you guys are going to say that i’m stereotyping minho

BUT IT MUST BE SAID

he likes it to a certain extent

if you belong to the more extremely squirmy people chances are he would get kinda annoyed having to hold you down LMAO

THATS NOT TO SAY THAT HE DOESNT LOVE SEEING YOU WRECKED

nononono honey... this man is corruption kink in human form

crying >>>>> moaning

WELL THATS MY GUESS

he’d be all cocky about it

“only i can make you feel like that baby?” 

WAIT LISTEN TO THIS

he has a whole ass folder on his phone that’s just pictures of you being completely wrecked 

he uses them to jerk off 110%

it can really be any kind of pictures but his favorite is the one where you have both cum and tears running down your face

somebody take the internet away from me 

Changbin

awh binnie baby likes it v v much 

it let’s him know how much you are enjoying it which is more important then getting his own pleasure

oof service top binnie?? ok stop cherry dont LMAO

weak for your whining 100%

especially if it’s all like,, high pitched and cute I CANT-

ngl it gets him even hornier 

you’re feeding his horny monster by holding onto him, scratching his back and leaving all kinds of marks. 

just gonna say it; he likes seeing you desperate

“binnie~ i need you inside of m-me..”

say that and HE A GONER

BECAUSE HE LIKES SEEING OTHERS WANT HIM (i know all your secrets dont even try to hide it you smug hot mf)

because of his buff arms he would have no problem pinning you down if you squirmed around too much 

his sturdy arms in contrast with your quivering body OH GAWD

“you want me? beg then” 

and you can’t simply ask 

you need to whine it

IT DOESNT HAVE TO SOUND CUTE

just desperate ;)))

Hyunjin

the whole fucking rubbing your face and hair against him; in love

it doesnt even have to be against him

against the bed or against a pillow is enough to keep him going

your hair all disheveled when you look at him :((

“do i fuck you that good, baby?” he cooed at you, your head burried in a multitude of pillows. you nod, your hair in your face as your whole body jerks forward from his powerful thrust

we all know that this boy is vocal 

so you would have to be EVEN LOUDER to get him off

which you were

god you know the dance lives??

when he’s all sweaty and is heaving for air?

head empty. only that

yeah... he would like a clingy s/o

because then he can go around and be proud of himself that he made you cry in bed LMAO

he wouldnt tell it to anyone, seeing it more as a personal achievement HASHASH

a sucker of you being squirmy

gives him more reason to use force when pinning you down 

showing himself off a lil...

blushing mess if you compliment him on his muscles tho... 

Jisung

you know that video where felix bites a banana with the peel still on and jisung goes all “SPIT IT OUT YOU FUCK” 

yeah thats what happens when you start crying from how hard he’s going

he thinks he fucked up real bad

no dude you just hitting it too good (HASHASH bye im yeeting myself off a cliff)

crying in bed makes him scared but do you know what really gets him?

whining

A LOT OF IT

he loves how they go from small murmurs to full out long whines that are all uneven

some incoherent words mixed into them together with his name

he also loves how they sound mixed with his moans and growls

i feel like he’s very moved by sound

the mf that would record your moans no cap

i feel like he would be the one to rub his head against you??

yk missonary (wow cherry has nothing else to come with LMAO) he drops his head when he’s close to cumming, shaking his head slightly against your shoulder, his soft hair tickling you

he would be the one tearing up when he’s close

BECAUSE you feel too good wrapped around his aching dick :((

can we really blame him? 

Felix

OOOOH MY GOD 

OOOOOOOOOOOH MY GOD

he loves it

more than he should

all of it; the crying, the rubbing against him, the whining, the hair in your face LIkE OOF

why? because it gives him a sense of being in control 

he has you under his control which IS RARE FOR HIM

OK he subs for you a lot and then he does the same thing, probably even more than you do

yk the whole rubbing his hair against your chest as he’s whining at the top of his lungs

BUT HE REDEEMS THAT WHEN HE DOMS

which is perfect because then its a give and take situation

happy sexy times

where the both of you are enjoying it waaay to much

WAIT THIS

imagine him pounding you in missionary right.... and both of you cry!?!?!

two overwhelmed babies :(((

Seungmin

Puppyboy is all for it 

let me just say,,, he has a corruption kink SAHSSAHS 

OK I KNOW EVERYONE IS GOING TO BE LIKE

“cherry he’s so neat and tidy, how could he possibly have a corruption kink?”

THATS WHY. BECAUSE HE LOVES SEEING YOU ALL TIDY AT DAYTIME

but god forbid nighttime because then you are nothing but a drooling and crying mess, holding onto him for dear life as he mercilessly pounds into you 

i swear this dude is all about drastic changes like duality is in his DNA

and i feel like he likes people that have that same charm??!?

IMAGINE THIS RIGHT;

you’re riding him, tired and fucked out of your mind, eventually leaning down to his chest and nuzzling your face in the crook of his neck, crying from overstimulation

AND THIS MF lifts you up slightly and starts thrusting up into you 

thats it. 

i love him AHSHASH

Jeongin

it would take a while for him to get used to you crying in bed 

first time it happened he got scared, stopped and hugged you, apologizing like a thousand times

you all like “...it was just getting good?”

he doesn’t understand shit at first???

“b-but why are you crying then? tell me the truth y/n”

“but i am?” 

after you explained that it just happens to you he’d nod and continue

after a while... he starts liking it

and if you one time don’t cry he’d be confused again, this time saying;

“did you not l-like it?” 

“dork, of course i did” you say ruffling his hair and he feels relieved hearing you say that 

ah cutie :(((

ALSO the whining and the squirming; total sucker for that LMAO 

OK IMMA SLEEP NOW holy shit my back is scoliosis central rn and im so damn nervous for my exam tomorrow AAAAAAH fuck fuck fuck 

ANYHOW HOPE THIS WAS FUN READING <333

[nat-20s]

8 for jmart?

#8- constantly cheacking their messages for words from the other

what else was I gonna do? here's some classic ol' season 3 pining babey

Hello Martin. This is Jon. I have gotten a new phone after losing my last one, please put in the new number.

It's a simple message. Straightforward, factual, and utilitarian. There is no reason that pressing send should make his heart race. There's especially no reason that the second he sends it off, he's tempted to lie on the deeply uncomfortable, likely bedbug infested motel mattress staring at his screen until he gets a response. Sure, he's sick of being overseas, and he's sick of being so isolated, and he's sick of running, but he's not...desperate for what little companionship can even be provided by words on a screen.

He does miss Martin, though. He misses Tim as well, but in a manner that's significantly more complex and knotted than the simple desire to be around him.

God, when did he start wanting to just be around Martin? He started being aware of that want when he was at Georgie's, but he has no idea when the want itself actually started. That was probably something he should examine. Technically speaking, that is something that he has time to examine, but he doesn't want to examine right now. Right now, he wants the comfort of perhaps one of the only people out there that doesn't want to kill him, or use him, or both.

Martin, whether through somehow sensing Jon's discontent from nearly 4000 miles away or, more likely, through a general dutifulness inherent to his character, only takes a few minutes to reply. Oh good! it'd been a little bit since hearing from you, we were somewhat worried. putting you in my contacts as we speak :)!

Saying that "we" were worried is almost certainly generous on Martin's part, but Jon feels no need to point that out. Instead he turns on his side and stares at the phone. He particularly focuses on the smiley face, ridiculously charmed by the fact that, despite everything, Martin hasn't lost his predilection for emojis. Two years ago, he would've rolled his eyes, maybe thought something snide about professionalism. It wouldn't have been fair, as Tim used to do the same thing and he thought nothing of it, but he wasn't fair back then. Now, he simply wonders if he can get away with sending one back.

Before he can respond, Martin sends another message. Are you actually alright? I realized I was kind of assuming that losing your phone was the only reason you were MIA, but is anything else going on?

Damn. He tends to forget how perceptive Martin can be. What, exactly, Martin had perceived in that first message, Jon couldn't be sure, but apparently there was something that tipped him off to the..eventful last week he'd had. He really, really doesn't feel like getting into all of that right now, especially not over text, so instead he replies a mostly truthful I'm fine.

Then, squinting at the screen and realizing that might come across as a dismissal, he adds, Well, other than trying not to contemplate the general sanitation practices of a motel that clearly hasn't updated it's decor since the 70s. I'm suspecting the sheets are much the same.

He doesn't know how Martin will react to the message. He can't see the face he'll make, won't know the tone of his voice. However, he likes to imagine that Martin will at least smile. Maybe he'll even give that breath of a laugh, the one that sometimes happens when Jon's being lightly acerbic and it's not directed at him. He doesn't know, but he does hope for it. Martin texts back Oof. Maybe sleep on top of the covers tonight, yeah?, and Jon thinks that he might have guessed Martin's reaction correctly.

Christ, who knew all it took was a combination of jetlag and threats to turn him into a sap. He needs to sleep. He really needs a deep, proper, uninterrupted sleep, one lasting a minimum of eight hours and ideally closer to fifteen. Checking the time, it would be a fairly reasonable time to sleep, especially with the early start he has tomorrow. He considers sending off a quick good night message, but then has the realization that as reasonable as it is for him to be asleep right now, it's just as unreasonable for Martin to be awake. Are you alright? Good lord, Martin, it's almost 4am over there. Did I wake you?

Barely 30 seconds pass before he gets back no, you're good!

A beat, then a follow up message. I've had a irregular sleep schedule since I was like 16. A lot of evening and night shifts had a lasting impact u know? Working at the institute made it a bit more consistent but it's still p rare that i sleep the same eight hours night to night.

Jon's starts to text back something sympathetic; he's had his own struggles with both in- and hyper- somnia, but his phone buzzes in his hand before he can finish it.

Sorry! That was uh probably more information than you wanted.

Well, that just won't do. Even if there wasn't a part of his brain that had recently started collecting facts about Martin like they were precious jewels instead of mostly mundane stories, he doesn't want Martin to think he can't talk to him about things outside of the standard bounds of coworkers. Not at all. We're friends, Martin, I enjoy learning about you.

His brain wants to catastrophize the second he presses send. For the first minute that Martin doesn't reply, he doesn't let it. After the second minute, he allows the minor worry to become more severe. Had it been too much? Were they friends? Jon certainly thought so, but what if Martin wasn't in the same boat? Their interactions had been entirely friendly for months now, but what if that was just Martin being polite? God, what if Martin still thought of Jon as his boss, nothing more?

Ten minutes. It takes ten minutes for Martin to finally respond, and Jon has almost called him four times to explain himself. Ten minutes, and the first response is only Oh!

Then: Cool

Well, that's not a "piss off and die", but it's not exactly comforting. Jon doesn't know how to reply, staring at the words on his screen and not entirely sure if he's fucked up or not. Fortunately, Martin's not done responding, and the next message is much, much better.

Hey uh. Feel free to say no I know it's getting late over there but. Im not getting back to sleep for the rest of the day and itd be nice to actually hear you. Would you be okay with a call?

Without a moment's hesitation, he texts back Yes!, exclamation and all, because he's become someone he barely recognizes. The phone rings just as immediately, and he feels his entire body relax at Martin's first "Hello?"

Things are difficult right now. Things have been difficult ever since the promotion that was a curse in disguise. The world is filled with monsters he barely understands. He wishes he was home despite the fact that he barely recognizes it, as filled with tension and strife as it is. There's so much to discuss, so many things they should be hammering out. But right now, the threats are not pressing. Right now, he can hear about the bad true crime documentary Martin half-watched before he got Jon's texts, and Jon can bitch about the three different "pip pip cheerio" comments he's gotten since coming over seas. Right now, and for the hour before Jon drifts off, breathing slow and deep, he can pretend that this is an ordinary phone call, in an ordinary world, between two people who simply miss each other an extraordinary amount.

[suckmybigtoeoikawa]

Robaire x reader how they met

yess!!! im also gonna write how he confesses to you ^_^

i imagine you guys meeting at a fancy party

you got dragged along by your friend, you honestly didn’t want to go, but who could pass us the opportunity to get free food

when you guys finally arrive at the fancy dinner (after spending like hours getting ready), your friend lowkey leaves you to go talk to her other friends

you started to follow along but then you just figured what’s the point and moved to the bar

it was pretty chill, you stayed on your phone but you were a little hurt that your friend left you

after a little bit of scrolling though your instagram feed, you hear someone say “excuse me”

“oh yeah my bad” you say and move a little over to give the person more room. they sit down next to you. there’s some more silence but you don’t really mind, you don’t even know this person.

“hey, uhm, what drink is that?” the person asks. you look up at them and you think ‘damn they look familiar’. “it’s presseco” you answer with a smile. “is it good, im not sure what i should get”. “Yeah it’s good, you’d should add some ginerale to it, then it’ll taste much better”, the person smiles back at you and says “thank you”.

now you could’ve sworn you’ve seen him before. it’s eating at you.. where have you seen him.. school? no..instagram.. probably.

the person orders their drink and takes a sip, “oh, i see what you like now”, they says chuckling but you couldn’t help but feel butterflies from the way they said it. “yep, it’s good right?” “yes, i’d try this again”

there’s some more silence, and you’re a bit scared to ask for their name so you just hold off.

“what’s your name?” the person asks. “Oh my name is y/n”. “nice to meet you y/n,” the person puts their hand out for you to grab. you put your hand out and you both shake hands. “my name is Robaire”. “nice to meet you” you smile.

you could’ve sworn he looked a little bit surprised after you said that, you didn’t know why. “so do you come to these events often?” you laugh a bit from how cliche the question is. “no not really, my friend dragged me along, usually at this time i’d be playing a video game or something”. he chuckles a bit, “yeah me too, i came here with some of my friends”. “that’s nice”. there’s some more awkward silence.

“so.. not to sound blunt but why’d you come over the the bar, and not stick with your friends?”. he picks up his drink and takes a sip, “well i got into a little argument with one of my friends, so i’m just cooking off. I think we just needed to calm down, we’re both stressed” he says. You can’t help but realize how collected he sounds, he’s so understanding. “hmm, i see, stressed from work or?” “yeah, work” he says, it sounded like he didn’t want to talk to much about it.

“well.. at least your here with me”, you pick up your drink with a smile and raise for a cheers. he follows suit. “cheers tooo?” you drag out the last word so he can finish the sentence. “to new friends”, he smiles and you guys cheers.

After a few hours of talking to Robaire, you realize more and more how attractive he is, and how cool he is too.

he mentions all the places he’s been to and all the people he’s met

honestly you thought he was a fuckboy

you guys end the night with exchanging numbers and from that day on you guys talked more

you still haven’t brought up where you think you’ve seen him before and honestly you don’t feel like asking either

2 years later

you and him are really good friends now, ans you also know what he does for his job

he’s a famous entertainer

your friend was so mad at you, because you didn’t know who he was when you guys first met

he told you he was scared to bring it up the first few weeks of talking because he didn’t want you to use him

you completely understood and still stuck around (and he fell deeper in love dawg)

one day he invite you out to dinner, it wasn’t anything special but he tells you to wear running shoes.

honestly you got scared

you guys arrived at the dinner spot and everything was chill, it was a dinner spot that he loved to go to and he got really cool with the owners as well so you guys could get a spot away from the public.

the whole dinner was smooth and nothing out of the ordinary. the only think that you noticed was that he was acting a bit weird. like very shy.

a few weeks ago you noticed it, and even when he was around the other 4*town members they would act a little bit suspicious as well. but today. he was acting totally different.

“hey so why did i need to wear specifically running shoes?” you ask. “well we’re gonna go on a walk after dinner” “robaire.. are you planning to kill me”. he laughs and says “no no no, i just gotta show you something”

after you guys finish eating, he looks so eager. so much so that he almost forgets to pay. but as you guys are walking to the spot you notice why he said to bring running shoes. you feet were killing you. it wasn’t even like you were out in the woods or nun. y’all were in the city streets walking, and at the time you don’t know if he did this on purpose trying to get you tired but lord have mercy it was tiring.

you guys end up stopping at some park. you guys find a bench to sit at and he points down to some flower on the ground. “this is what i wanted to show you”. you look at him like he’s crazy. “..t-the flower?”. “yes, i know it may seem weird but listen. what do you think is so different about this flower” “uhm… “, you look around to see if there is anything different. you lowkey irritated, your tired and exhausted and now he got you playing blues clues?. “i don-” your sentence is cut short when he kisses you.

you just look at him. your shocked. “y/n..” “y-yes” “will you date with me?”. you’re shocked completely and confused. but at the same time everything makes sense: why he was acting so weird, why he was being so shy, so fidgety. “yes” you smile.

he kisses you again and he’s saying over and over again “for real?”.

you ask him why he showed you a flower and he tells you about how he wants that flower to represent your guys relationship, he wants it to grow into a beautiful flower

he’s such a romantic lord have mercy

[brilliantfantasticgeronimo]

the giggle - thoughts and reactions (part 2/2)

obsessed with how much attention donna pays to the recap... ("is all of this true?" well there's some nuances donna but yeah pretty much lol)

"by a bird(????????)" favorite delivery of all time

yoo i saw gifsets of this scene and was sad they skipped 13 era but they DONT skip 13's era dfsklj (And listen im thasmin-truther thru and thru but flux IS more of a proper, affecting trauma than like, the doctor being a fuckboi for the 60th time skdlfjkdl) once again fandom was making a fuss about nothing ugh

the doctor's subtle shift+close-up when it comes to bill's bit in ze recap........... too soon

they contractually needed an scene where nph could show his card-playing magician chops hehe

"i made every opinion supreme. they shout and they type and they cancel. that's the game of the 21st century" ur brain on liberalism/idealist philosophy

"and u know full well we're both elderitch horrors" was such a sexy comeback lol

("doctor, the doctor, fun")

"we can be celestial" ok we didnt need to remember *that* about the toymaker, rtd :/

handmeidens .… interesting insult choice....

"every single one of you is fantastic" iidk mel i have my reservations about twin dilemma!six...

bi-generation is supposed to be a myth ... myht myth myth... EYES EMOJI. BLURRED EYES EMOJI.,!!!!! SALT. THIS ONLY HAPPENED BECAUSE OF THE SALT. (screams into the night)

"i think you're beautiful" "*still* beautiful" obsessed w/ it. yes 14 you’re still a beautiful woman probably.

"i’ll have medows of doctors dying over and over again" he’s just a whump fic writer. Let him be. Toymaker just #tag your shit and everything is OK.

HE SHRANK THE GUARDIANS INTO VODOO DOLLS sdlkfjd rip the funky birds!!!!

you loved rose and river AND YAZ!!!!. damn they SHOULD have put yaz there. it would have Worked so damn well with the themes of this special ghgh and would have actually delivered the point that 14 “says things like that now”. And would have connected all the arcs so well aghghghg.

Lol 15 trying bludgeon 14…. me when [the self-hate] (also // to donna’s "this is so therapeutic!")

but this is what i get... my reward... and is not fair

mmm… dr who is a tv show fuel → the toymaker gets “banished” from this reality… and he gets flattened .... like it is rn if u watch the episode. u are looking at a flat image of NPH...

“you do it day by day”... i cry (“that would drive me mad” let's hope fourteen's life doesn't go the way of The Hours (2002) directed by Stephen Daldry lol)

“my reward.... to come home” t.t aaaaaa mi fine IM FINE

a tardis that regenerates in the second act WILL bi-regenerate in third act

people were so mad that they didnt make it about change.... well yeah it wasnt about change. it was about rehab

if we see a tardis w/o the jukebox, that's not me (we don't see it...)

"you werent gonna leave without saying goodbye, were you?" "as if i would ever do that" (translation: damn, u saw what i was gonna do)

"good luck" (translation: bitch go collect NEW TRAUMA away from me)

the evil step mother dslkfjk

ching out for fandom 2 mine all the Gen Fic possible out of this situation for years to come. Peace.

CONCLUSIONS!

oh boy. dskflj let's separate it by points, I'm Eager To Soapbox tonite...

ON DOCTORDONNA:

this was a success for me in ways the star beast wasn't. there’s so much Food in this one. "to come home" "maybe i will save you", etc etc etc etc. It feels like it draws a close to 10 and Donna’s story... but not really bc “the story never ends”....aka: Fandom the ball is now in ur court, the ground is Fertile for us to produce decades upon decades of Gen Fic (and they even get a TARDIS a la deleted tentoo scene! so we aren't even confined to domestic stuff only!!!) it is our time to Feast. Merry Christmas and God Bless Us All <3

ON MESSAGING: This episode is, at the very least, made up of 2 hats: the first hat is " toymaker outfoxing The Dr." (no complaints in this), and the hat inside that hat is: “humanity going mad and being The Problem” ... this was good enough to be its own hat. but it is kinda forgotten? If this were a normal season I feel that would have been a full episode where we would feel the implications of it . maybe then I would respect it more as a Political Message / Social Criticism bc rn it feels very eye roll lib core / basic af... to Elaborate:

this is what prejudice works like only if u have no understanding of material conditions. "why are people so prejudiced? BC they're afraid and mad! their fear of the new makes them lash out!!!!" sure. but the reason *that's* dangerous is not bc suddenly everyone will start rowing on the streets, is bc 1% of ppl get *benefits* from this line of thinking. prejudices are not actually "born" out of "fear" and "madness" but are *carefully, intentionally constructucted and/or encouraged* by the dominant class)

(Meiners wasn't an "irrational" person, he was being /quite/ rational in furthering scientific racism …… germany's wealth came from exploiting nigeria, togo, rwanda.… meiners own wealth came from that. Slavery *is* logical if you’re an slaverer. Pretending it isn’t leads u to pointless things like trying to “argue” against socdems in power to further refugee rights… they don’t care. They are doing it because it benefits them. It isn’t a “flaw” in the system, it’s the system working as intended).

(so like, yeah this is a ~validating and ~poignant commentary to watch if u are a ~liberal (tr: center-right person) who wants to believe they're superior to conservatives (extreme right person), but it's... not actually an astute or meaningful reading of the political zeitgeist)

so yeah. that plot fumbled imo and my hope now is with the upcoming Kate and PM story we can go harder on "Dealing With The Zeitgeist" and maybe redeem this in the process. we shall see...

On The Big Controversy:

Bigeneration rlly rlly works for me ... tbh On a couple levels… first, the mechanical: the doctor after TTC has been thoroughly portrayed as a Weird Thing more than any other time recently. Ppl used to joke about “elderitch horror” doctor before but now it feels like… way more real. The Doctor is really fucking weird !! so having them split like a cell? To survive? Yeah to me that feels like a very “yeah, this might as well happen”. After The Regeneration Limit has been throughout Debunked in-universe, it follows that we would question... just how much life is there in this fucking guy??? well, too much to be contained in one body, babes!

SO, that’s the mechanical level… but on the emotional level? I love it even more. The thing to understand is that... in this story, regeneration is *not* a device for telling a story about “accepting change” (that’s been done, lbr, more than enough times before). Here, it is actually doing a new thing for The Show: it is telling a story about “the journey of Healing” (hopefully, the first step in a very long Journey focused on that). 15 holding 14, embracing him… that’s just, well, it's moving man. 14 is a mess and 15 from what I’ve seen is Fucked Up In Brand New Ways… but here, in this moment, at least they’re starting to show a little bit of self-compassion. That’s one of the hardest things there is man, and for a character that has gone thru sm Grief and sm Trauma and shown so much downright self-destruction, self-sabotage, season after season after season… (literally saying ‘no’ to Yaz the day before for (reasons)!!!)…. And like, going against every other “the doctor can’t stand themeselves” character beat since The Power Of Tree (which I love don’t get me wrong but!! it's always had Implications!!)!!! ... well... It’s truly hopeful. It’s relatable. It’s beautiful. I'm sorry some dw fans are so tired of DT that they truly are missing out on something Monumental for the show / the character in general. That leads us to... ON THE TRANSITION FROM 13'S ERA

I also feel ngl fandom seriously worries about such… unimportant things all the time. “oh but having a DT with a tardis out there MIGHT make people think Ncuti isn’t legitimate!!!!” bro every other white doctor was already out there having adventures in the TARDIS every other week. Ppl who don't consider 13 or 14 as legitimate were already doing that by refusing to watch the show and sticking to the watching the 40+ seasons of white males as leads that are literally a click away. Like I’m sorry to bring up old fanwank but sdklfjsd god, honestly that was such a bizarre, intangible worry to have. When u actually watch the special w/o all these marketting worries... They very much …… don’t forget 13 in these specials . in fact it’s quite the opposite sdklf to get a true Understanding of all the layers going on in 14’s arc, 13’s story are p much requisite viewing. and I'm a flux Enjoyer thru and thru but c'mon, we all talked about how the resolution was fumbled sdlkfjsd it's Good that they are doing the fallout of 13 committing a triple genocide now!!! these specials actually elevated flux, not the opposite.

That said... god, they really should have mentioned Yaz there at the end in that "we loved her" bit re: Rose/River... I don’t know, it feels so glaring? if you didn't want to alienate the normies, why mention flux and (all the 32408 mentions of lore) in this? mentioning yaz seems so less dangerou in that case. idk. perhaps it was On Purpose and The Shoe Will Drop at some point with 15 (RTD is after all the man who gave us canon Nyssa/Tegan when he really didn’t Have To At All lol this guy would make all the companions gay if he could), but rn it’s like :/ thumbs down on that. CONCLUSIONS TO THE CONCLUSIONS

just great "big event" dr who tbh! flawed and with some things that annoyed me but also with enough stuff to send me out to do/read fanworks for the next 15 years lol . nph annoys me sometimes but toymaker was perfectly done. lots and lots of character and lore implications to make me break the tumblr post character limit. execution wise... the effects were great and the set pieces really worked. messaging as i said was weak, tho like with the lack of enough Shirley+Kate+Mel+Rose development, knowing what we know from BTS news ... this is gonna be re-treaded ground again in a few weeks, so.. we'll see if this improves (or gets worse lol). watch this space~

the giggle - thoughts and reactions (part 1/2)

fourteen breaking up from the dance- w/ the toymaker-> "do you see why i broke with him?"

kate going to hug fourteen feels very appropriate sdlkfj kate is like 14 aka barerly holding it together lol distincly not Having Had A Good time for a while. Esp avoiding any serpents...she’s just 1 scandal away from a malcolm tucker "this job has fucked me in every hole of my fucking body" meltdown")

"no change then, there" rtd making all his rtd1 era political subtext into text lol

oh…. so kate is just 1 mind-funker away from becoming an immigrant-hating, disabled-hater, bravermanish AnCapp ........................ interesting to know (put a pin on that tbh. I feel we may finally get the antagonist!kate of our dreams (my dreams) in this era)

shirley being so "is it offensive? Well, borderline..." and "absolutely no need" and "don't make me the problem" feels kinda like... "oh we can have a have a badass disabled character but she can't actually impose herself or be an inconvinience in any way" ://

like damn in that exchange with kate, just have a "we'll talk about it later" line. From a non-political / strictly narrative-pov, that would give us a bit of a flavor for their relationship as well.

"can't you give everyone a mask?" "imagine trying that" the thing is. russel.......... they did very much give everyone a mask, DSFKLJ like *some* made a big noise and sure it's alarming for "what that means" but like... most ppl did in fact mask up sldfkj that was a very significant thing that happened, in fact.........)

the old archengel network~~

CANON WEST END MELANIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

rtd taking "but no one watches television anymore!" people and giving them the middle finger <3 iconic

nah we were already mad dr. you're not that important

"that's righteusness! that's human!" but let us seeeee the effect. same problem as the first special. we're too much in the doctor's pov. let me see the *outside world* pov. rtd1 used to be so good with this :/

"you have my permission" autocracy? in MY dr. who? is more likely than u think

(what separates 14 from 10 is that like.... 11-12-13... they could all be quite ruthless, but those post-10 doctors didnt waste time with bs. they just Get On with the autocracy w/ no pretenses lol) (it's growth (tm) but at the same time........... oh, yeah, we're on a waters of marsy / ghost light-y path lol)

"hello" "hi" T.T so cute!!! i love them

"good old sabolom glitz" what an oxymoron lol

"I've got nothing. My family are all gone" oof. timeless child parallelsssss

also melanie if u want a family u just need to adopt a bunch of orphaned, supernaturally-enhanced teenagers. it worked for SJ!!!

kate WILL hire all your ex-girlfriends doctor and there's nothing u can do to stop her

"all this time and you didn't mentioned her" i mean tbf. i love melanie but .not mentioning sj *is* more alarming than not mentioning melanie sdlkfjsdklfjsd

"you're wearing yourself out" YEAH THAT’S WHAT I’VE BEEN SAYING

companions marathoning doctor who thru the doctor's head is always so clara coded

we can't have 10.000 …….. but we can have this “the first man picked up a rock” monologue.

(tbh actually......... i always thought it was very fitting for The Story of dr. who that the very first serial and is a historical about "the day friendship was invented" , so them invoking that rn feels very fitting. The toymaker, as a the Doctor’s Fun House Mirror Of The Day reframes that day (that story) as the day *murder* was invented. )

thie flashbacks make the toymaker serial look so much better than it is lol the land of stories serial >>> toymaker serial

"you never tell me to do that" he does actually jjkjkkklk all the time.......

"that's what unravels me, all the laws I cling to, gone" for The Theme…. → overcoming trauma is about accepting the irationality and injustice of it happening. It’s necessitates accepting that life can be fundamentally Unbalanced and not Karmic.

this ep is fun but is like.... idk some of 14's speeches here. Him being so clear-headed… it feels bit gratuitous? Unearned? this "im always so certain" as well... which *shouldnt feel like that* since we've had 13 seasons (40+ seasons*) of development before this. but idk it still feels like... too much too sudden?

"take away the toys... what am i? what am i now?" the kids aren't all right.mp3

maybe i'll save u!!! aaaaa TOT

(for all the talk about "i say things like that now" the doctor doesn't actually says she loves donna *to* her face here...)

“games don’t have a memory, every game starts from scratch” tbh that’s what watching the show is like sometimes lol even for us ~reconcile everything~folks… at some point u do gotta take each week as its own thing.

the giggle in my head………… // the drumming…?

lol the "i thought i was clever" puppetry imaginery and the twisting of the ten-era"help me" motif.. c'mon toymaker is just ur avarage fan fiction writer. u are valid my dude!! join AO3!!!