#World CP Day
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alittlebitbethany · 1 year ago
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Hi everybody I’ve posted a new #youtubevideo on my channel in honour of @worldcpday today. Please check it out it would mean a lot to me.
Image Description: a screenshot of a #youtube video featuring a picture photo of a #blythedoll with Green eyes , wearing a green sleeveless shirt mini dress and White go-go boots. The text reads BC’s Doll Place: Happy World Cerebral Palsy Day 2023( With Subtitles). #cerebralpalsy #worldcerebralpalsyday #worldcpday #worldcpday2023 #disability #dollphotography #blythe #blythedolls #blythedollsofinstagram #green #dollcollector #dollcollecting #takaratomy #neoblythe
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delicatebeauties · 22 days ago
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What are your wish list for the heart killers ost and mvs?
As for me
1. joong -
unknown / open to suggestions - he seems to have a deeper range and smooth range.
Or something like :
or a moves like jagger beat and visual?
2. dunk -
-thai english or a full on english cover for the international market
something pop punk ? something like a male acoustic cover of dirrty by Aguilera? Or Hartley in Hawaïi?
I really want jojo to lean on the hot babe vibe for the mv in a subtle way, full on car repairs and grease (ala transformers scene for megan fox)
or those visuals (less intense..)
3. firstkhao - thai
- something in the vibes of 21 pilots? or sucker for pain?
- a more pop version of heartbreak hotel (Elvis?)
- jazzy noir detective inspired / duke Ellington? with a thai noir vibe?
- neo dark tangoish vibes a la palermo/berlin in money heist?
Visuals wise :
kant in that dark car and blue shirt in a mini detective style with bison tailing him and taking Polaroids ? a caress on the neck or nape?
bison in a sleek player (think Vegas in KP) styling- after all once the heists are over he can shed the innocent look
a car chase / on the run mv?
i so want them to be each other video vixen 👄 and for any of the 4 to dance with a silver standing mic. Sleek pin suit or thin cravat suit for first to distinguish from the more indie look in sand mv
Other inspo/gif heavy
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rcguish · 3 months ago
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if you see silver doing something with his right hand (eating, drawing, typing on his phone) and it either falls away or he switches to his left in the middle of whatever it is, most typically it's the pain. right hand/wrist flares up more than his left due to right being his default / receiving the most stress, though years of practice has made him ambidextrous.
the level of pain is usually in the level of how much can he keep from his facial expression. no change is just a minor ache or a sharp yet quick sting, anywhere from a one to a six. a squint erring on the side of wince is perhaps something more pervasive, rating around a seven on that scale. maybe it's multiple areas of his body rather than a focused problem area, maybe it's an all over ache that wears him down throughout the day. sharp inhales through his teeth / hisses accompanied by almost / completely closing his eyes + furrowed eyebrows is usually pain ranging from eight to ten. this is either a localized and acute pain that won't go away + every little movement aggravates it ; or a deepset muscle ache throughout every centimeter of his body and limbs, fingers and toes. like he could feel even the movement of his hair and the energy it takes to even blink.
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eldistchild · 7 months ago
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It’s so sad, yet so obvious, when even other women see me (as a person with a uterus) as just a baby-factory. Just last night a seemingly rational woman decided to lecture me at work about how sad my ancestors would be if I don’t choose to reproduce (even though I told her I have siblings who plan to have kids.) About how people need something to live for- and children are something to live for. About how I’m “so beautiful” there should be more of me in the world? For a start, those seem like extremely foolish and selfish reasons to have kids. But also, this woman was just a customer at my job who I’d never met. In what world is it any of her business? In the world where women (females specifically but you can’t for sure tell someone’s biological sex by looking,) are here for the *sole purpose* of churning out more humans.
People who pressure anyone into having children do not see those people as human beings. They see us as factories to keep up the population and/or as validation that they made the right choice having kids because “everyone else is doing it.” Or maybe they just want everyone to be as miserable as they secretly are, but it’s really not a cute look.
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thedeadthree · 2 years ago
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SCARLET; the corpo -> CYBERPUNK 2077
— OCS + THE HOLIDAYS // for @marivenah and happy birthday!
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sirenemale · 1 year ago
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Maybe I'm just desensitized from dealing with like cptsd probably ocd neurotic soup unchecked for my whole life and finding ways to just phase out the chatter of it but seeing ppl here talk abt moral ocd and stuff in a way where they refuse to be reminded of racism or anything is baffling to me. Like I don't get how that's helpful for you, instead of separating thoughts and morals from yourself and your actions you're just going oh no my religious ocd is triggered when ppl talk about me having privilege or benefitting from systemic oppression so therefore I'm never going to interact with marginalized people who talk about it ect ect ect. Or proship ppl being like it's too hard to take a stance against incest and age gap ships so they're just no holds bars for it now. Like again maybe I'm being mean, being online is hard I do think the way ppl talk is especially triggering for ocd and the whole born good born bad self flaggelation for forgiveness stuff never be wrong takes especially eat at me but they are symptoms ultimately and letting it box you out from ways you can actually genuienly improve as a person feels wildly unhelpful to me. Sitting with guilt and understanding what is real harm thats been done by you and actual bad things you believed and what is the brain chatter is crucial.
#ig it's just that unpacking that and ingrained beliefs and the urge to be centered and coddled is#something you have to be doing regardless and i kind of jsut cant respect not doing that#like i care abt ballroom there is a ballroom scene here and my ruminations can play up on anything like#i absolutely cannot engage with the ballroom scene here its not a space for pakeha reslly and i dont want to come off as a white drag race#fan who isnt aware of privilege and wants to be inserted everywhere egotist ect maybe even being into drag at all is problematic ill never#understand ballroom bc i didnt go thru enough and bc im white and z and x and x#and like THAT is disordered thinking that is feedjng off scraps of white fragility and online discourse#but there is truth that the scene here is intimate and new and primarily for maori and pacific and takatapui and that is how it needs to be#like i hope im not wildly off base. idw be one of those ppl who are like just found out abt opression im going to make myself the singular#voice and educator on it coughing at breadtube phenomena kinda thing right right right#like just white ppl bouncing obvious things they just learned back and forth to feel more progressive#i just think ocd isnt a good reason to feed into the left cannibalizes itself cant say anything these days isms of it all and the like#ohhh ur a puritan bc u think cp is bad parts of the net#my self analyzing and ruminations are a thin line but it has genuienly improved me to understand that#your shame and guilt whether it's rational or disordered or not isn't the center of the world and does not need to be coddled#anyway LMAO it did spend 5 hours writing this bc it is disordered and got stuck on it#long post
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slowtumbling · 1 year ago
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The Unknown Soldier - Remembering a Veteran of Peace
On this Veteran’s Day, I honor my grandpa who, rather than go to war, joined Civilian Public Service (CPS) as a Conscientious Objector (CO) during Word War II. He left a young wife and did not return, except on brief furloughs, for four years. My dad, born during that time, wondered who this visiting stranger was. Rather than destroy, Grandpa, like the many other men in CPS, helped build the…
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puppetmaster13u · 5 months ago
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Prompt 334
So. Danny has discovered he might erm, might be technically a necromancer. At least as far as magic is concerned. Like even if it’s just via resurrecting himself the magic side of things (god, he’s more scientist- sided dangit) count it as such. 
Which means that half the time someone tries to summon a necromancing-esque being, he’s the one who gets tugged if he’s even a centimeter within range. It was annoying enough in high school, it’s no less annoying in this world they’ve all moved to. 
On the bright side, thanks to also being half dead himself, the summonings and other rituals can’t actually drag him somewhere. It just causes him to feel like someone was crushing a lung or two, which honestly nothing new. (Gosh were those days of vigilante work really that violent? Huh, guess they were)
What he wasn’t expecting was for a tiny child, a living child, to track him down despite him not existing legally or anything similar in this world, to revive their previous local child vigilante. Which like, hey, first of all, he has a few questions? Just a couple and yeah sure, he’ll shake on it- can he have your name first there kid…? 
Tim, on the other hand, is getting a little concerned when he realizes a lot of the questions the probable-fae keeps asking are in line with the stuff CPS asks. (Unknown to him, that is exactly where Danny is getting several of his questions about this scrawny vigilante kid. Erm. He might have to take the kid, for like, his own safety- hey Frostbite he needs your help he has some questions-) 
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alex51324 · 20 days ago
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Now, more than ever, we need to be careful about spreading misinformation and rumors
I can guarantee that over the next few months, we'll be hearing about a lot of alarming things going on here in the US. Some of those things will be true, and some won't. (And some will have both true and false or exaggerated elements.)
It's going to be absolutely vital that important information is not drowned out by misinformation, rumors, and ragebait.
That means, when you see something that would be important if true, before sharing, you check whether it's actually true.
In library world, we use the acronym SIFT:
STOP: Don't spread the information, or get caught up in your emotional reaction to it, before you've checked it out. INVESTIGATE: Who is saying it? How do they know? If there are links or sources in the post, do they actually say what the person is saying they do? FIND other coverage: Do an internet search for key details: quotes, people's names, specific locations. If something major is happening, there will normally be a lot of coverage. TRACE claims, quotes, and media back to their original context.
Usually you don't need to do all four things: just STOP and then pick what makes sense from the other three. If you decide to share the information, you can also say what you did--"This is a firsthand account from XYZ protest; it lines up with what the local TV station is saying, but has a lot more details about what the cops did," or whatever.
The more urgent the information seems, the more important it is to make sure it's reliable.
If we're hearing every other day that this or that vulnerable group is in immediate, life-threatening danger--but 49 times out of 50 it turns out to mean Trump rambled somewhere about something which, if actually implemented, could end up having the described consequences at some point down the line--then people aren't going to know the difference the one time in 50 when the danger really is immediate.
Think, here, things like immigration crackdowns, CPS investigations into parents who affirm a trans child's gender, or demands that health care providers report miscarriages to law enforcement. We all know that these are things Trump World talks about a lot and would like to be able to do, in some form. For the sake of the people affected by these topics, we need different ways of talking about, "Here they are, back on their bullshit," versus, "This is a policy proposal for a real thing that could happen," versus, "Holy shit, grab the kids and run."
We cannot go to "Holy shit, grab the kids and run" every time Trump, or someone in his inner circle, decides to bloviate about something that could disastrously affect people lives. The people who are most in danger can't stay at DefCon 5 every day of their lives, and when they do really have to grab the kids and run, we need that alarm to be heard over the constant background hum of dread.
The same goes for action items--whether protests, ways to help, or little things people can do to stay safe/sane. There's going to be plenty going on, and nobody is going to be able to do everything, so do your part by passing along those things that you can vouch are true and important, and skipping the things you aren't sure about.
I'll leave you with an example. Remember how a few years ago, we were all-in about hand hygiene and disinfecting surfaces? And then it turned out that those were not actually very important in terms of preventing the transmission of COVID-19, and what we really need is better air filtration in public spaces--but, at my work at least, we still have canisters of surface-disinfecting wipes sitting around, and tattered old signs up about hand hygiene, and no air filters.
At the time, early in the pandemic, we were sharing the best information we knew about how to stay safe, but people got a little too fixated on that initial advice--remember how people would wipe down their groceries? And those little sticks for pressing elevator buttons?--and then when the advice changed, they didn't want to hear about it.
Distrust, fatigue, superstitious attachment to the old grocery-wiping ways--there were a lot of reasons, but the key thing to take away is that attention, energy, and goodwill are all finite resources. Try to avoid wasting it with grocery-wiping--or worse, shilling for the guy selling little sticks to press elevator buttons with.
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bet-on-me-13 · 1 year ago
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The one where Bruce is the asshole (again)
So! We have a typical story where the JLA finds out about the Situation in Amity.
Whichever way they find out doesn't matter, but either way they end up sending Batman to do a threat analysis and review of whether this requires their attention.
And while there, he runs into a Kid who obviously needs to be saved from his Abusive Home. Look at him, he's far too thin, his grades are horrible, he has many unexcused absences, and he has bruises hidden under his clothes.
Even after figuring out that Danny is Phantom the local Hero, he thinks Danny needs to be saved from his Parents.
I mean, it's plain to see! They Hates Ghosts with a Passion, negelct their son very often, shoot at him nearly every day, and are probably the ones who killed him in the first place!
So, with no input from Danny himself, Bruce calls CPS on the Fentons and uses his Wealth to expedite the process and avoid the actual Investigation. (I mean, why would you even need one? It's so obviously a bad home!)
The Fenton's are arrested, and Bruce reveals that Danny is Phantom to convince the Courts that they are horrible people for shooting at their own son, and that they should be locked up (ignoring the horrified looks on their faces, probably cause they were living with a Ghost for so long, thats probably why).
He immediately offers to adopt Danny, even when Danny vehemently refuses his offer. He knows that Danny will come around to it, he's doing this for his own good. He still thinks his Parents were good people, and not thr Villains they really were.
Meanwhile Danny's life has been completely uprooted thanks to the self-righteous machinations of an Adoption Crazed Fruitloop! And not even the usual one!
Sure his parents were often busy with their work, but they Always set aside time to hang out with their kids and make sure they were okay. They never abused him, the neglect was only for like a month or two when the portal before they got their act together and apologized for it, and (most importantly) THEY DIDN'T KNOW he was a Halfa when they shot at him! They only found out when the ASSHOLE revealed his Identity in Court!
And Danny is Extra enraged by that part. The Adoption Crazed Fruitloop had revealed his secret identity for the ENTIRE WORLD TO HEAR!
He would never be able to live a normal life anymore, even if he managed to get away from the Moron who caused all this!
Bruce Wayne was a Villain in his eyes.
He ripped him from his home and from his family (basically kidnapped), revealed his identity to the world so he was forced to stay with him for fear of the GIW, and spun the whole story so that it looked like he was the Good Guy in this!?
It was official. Danny Hates Bruce Wayne, possibly more than anyone else in the World.
And that's a High Bar.
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hoseoksluna · 21 days ago
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THE BALL OF LIGHT, i. | myg, jjk
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pairing: friend!jeongguk x fem!oc (ft. brother!yoongi)
genre: fluff
word count: 2.9k
summary: life of other people never mirrored yours and jeon jeongguk will never be yours, either.
pin: ball of light / taglist: join / discord: join / masterlist: run
cp: ao3 / wp
warnings: smoking, suggestive but not described thoughts of nudity, pessimism, orphancy / the members in this series are fictional.
note: everybody, welcome the new series. it is a multiple member-centered fanfic, so the names you see in the title don't necessarily mean the pairing is endgame or anything like that. who the main love interest is will be a surprise that the fic will slowly reveal. trust the process with the first chapter. it's short on purpose and i will reveal the information and quicken the plot along the way. let me know what you think. reblogs and esp comments are mandatory unfortunately in the hoseoksluna house:/ ...... sfjsldfjsldfj ENJOY. i love u guys! should i crosspost it on wattpad? (im scared of wattpad)
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… Or was his destiny from the start To be just one moment  Near your heart? 
(Ivan Turgenev)
— an epigraph from the book White Nights by Fyodor Dostoyevsky
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Your brother Yoongi was always the pair of hands that would tug your legs down whenever you would fly in your books for too long. He did it out of tender care and fatherly kindness, calling your name in order for you to come join him in the kitchen for a meal. To be some semblance of a family after the tragedy had sunk its teeth into your bloodline. And what you had never imagined was that one day, you’d have to leave him behind to step inside a dream of this very reality. 
Throughout the trajectory of your girlhood, you had lived inside the worlds of your books. Classical literature that carried more depth, more leniency, despite its hardships that the characters went through, than this world. The idea of love clung to you like a second skin, one you wouldn’t really receive from the two important roles in your life because you weren’t made out of love, but would find within flowery and difficult words of another time. Digging deep and understanding made you fall in love with it, seek it in school, in the streets and inside your own home, only to look and walk past those people still empty-handed. 
In spite of it all, your palms were, somehow, still heavy. As if they carried something invisible for worldly eyes. 
You would see it come to life whenever you would close yourself up in your room, with your folded legs, your short hair wild and with a book on your lap. Dostoyevsky taught you that love could be found upon a fateful coincidence and it marred you in a beautiful way that was pitifully disastrous. It forced your eyes to look for it everywhere, even through the reappearing pain of disappointment, and it especially forced you to look for it at home. 
The hope remained even after both of your parents went to the other side of this love, beyond this world. They passed away due to an unfair illness. And because they went at the same time, you often found yourself thinking if they loved each other in the realm of eternity, when they very seldom loved each other in this temporary realm. 
Your firm, ingrained dreaminess helped you cope with the sudden silence, the aftermath of your state of orphancy. You no longer had to reread a sentence in your book a thousand times, the once screeching voices beyond the door of your bedroom shunned out, dead, but still pulsing. The walls carried the ghosts of those parental fights and Yoongi… he, in his secret sensitivity to the paranormal, braided for you a bracelet of black thread. To keep you safe from those spirits, to help you heal. 
He didn’t have one of his own, and that fact faultlessly described the new role he clothed himself in within this abrupt change. He would stare at the walls with a cold gaze, threatening them with power if they ever made a sound. He sat more at the kitchen table now than he did at his music station in his room, spine hunched over a myriad of bills that would make him pull on his hair until a bald spot formed. On the left side of his head, just above his ear, where his amygdala bloomed with black flowers. 
You would come home from school, glide your eyes over his bare wrist pressed to his cheek,  and touch the tense muscles over his protruded shoulder blades. You saw, vividly, the way his new role tore him apart and you wanted to help him. Physically and emotionally. But Yoongi rejected your help, rejected the emotions you were so willing to smooth out and caress with the lines of your palm that knew love from the way you caressed the pages of your books. He would get up from the table, tell you to shower, and he would walk to the kitchen to prepare you a meal, a meatless one because meat was expensive. He would wash his hands in the sink, let the cold water hide the strands of hair he plucked out of stress. 
He would pretend that everything was fine when in reality, nothing was fine. 
Your parents didn’t leave you a dime, but they let you keep the house you and Yoongi grew up in. Left an unpaid mortgage in your hands instead of happy memories, instead of love. 
But Yoongi, he showed you love. He would show it to you by the way he would boil the water for you in the beginning of yours and his orphancy because he had no money to pay for the water bill and because all the money he had saved in his boyhood was used for funeral expenses. He would show it to you by the way your plate would have meat and his wouldn’t. And he showed it to you by the way he wouldn’t allow you to find a job and financially help him, but instead told you to focus on your degree. To focus on your dream. No matter how many times you pestered him that you could find a part-time job. 
No, your dreams require your full attention, he had said once, that Yoongi-coded frown shadowing his features. Go study. 
And so you bowed your head and silently left, retreating into your room while contemplating in your heart that Yoongi never knew what your dreams looked like. And neither did you. Not until they showed up right in front of you. 
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It is a time perfumed by the upcoming winter, the November time of the present. Frost has been kissing each corner of glass one would stumble across in the city of Seoul, decorating it with its affection using its snowflakes. It’s what you’re looking at, perched with your shivering form on the bus stop with the only friend you ever had in your lifetime. 
Or a so-called friend. You don’t think you would use the term friendship with a guy like Jeongguk. 
He represented the unattainable aspect in the books you’ve read. The goal that hasn’t yet been reached. The agonized yearning that hangs by a thread around the character’s life. He embodied the aspect of pain itself—because if life had been a little kinder to you, he would be yours. 
Life, however, isn’t kind. 
Life is realistic.
You met the boy at a wrong time in his life. Passing by him on the stairway of your high school, you caught him in a tense, yet volatile situation of an emotional kind. Spring, still reminiscent of winter, had wrapped itself around your nineteen years of age, and you, dreaming a strange dream that you couldn’t wake up from, ran late for your class. You hadn’t spoken to him prior this fateful day, though you knew of his existence. He was just a background character that you didn’t pay any attention to until he blazed up with life and the sparks of sensitivity on that empty staircase. And you couldn’t take the other way; you couldn’t turn around and miss the class. You had to walk by him and his girlfriend at the time while they were in the middle of an argument that shook through the echo of the space. 
You walked by them, but the encounter changed your life. It changed your life because Jeongguk’s cheeks were tearstained, glistening in the uncanny white of the staircase. His eyes were fixed on yours, his eyelashes wet and long—prettily, so terribly prettily. You quietly apologized, running up the stairs as rapidly as you could, and his eyes did not leave yours until you were out of his view. And then you heard the shuffling of feet and where there was an absolute turmoil, silence replaced it. 
Jeongguk found you that very day. 
Alarm was eclipsed over those puffy eyes, his eyelashes no longer wet, but still long, so terribly pretty. You were on your way out, exiting the building, when he grabbed a hold of your backpack, stopping you from disappearing. And when you gazed back with absolute horror, your short bob swishing around you, Jeongguk smiled a soft half-smile, which thinned out that negative emotion—as if he did it on purpose, not wanting to scare you. 
What’s your name? he started with a question, his shoulders slouched and drooping, an evident tiredness misting him in a drowsy aura. His voice was strained, bubbling in his throat as if he either screamed his vocal cords raw or didn’t speak for a while, choosing silence. Both options turned your heart upside down, painfully. You felt a greater pity for him than you ever have for someone in your lifetime—and that was the beginning of all your firsts with him. 
When you said your name, Jeongguk averted his gaze and nodded his head. You expected him to ask you which year you were born, but he kept his eyes low as he uttered the words, which made your pity for him grow into a bare tree�� with just one twig, a seemingly singular wing, within you. 
I don’t know how much you heard, but Ka-eun didn’t do anything wrong. It was a misunderstanding and I would appreciate it if you kept it to yourself. 
You had heard a female screaming, seething voice, but due to your sleepy state, you hadn’t made out what those words actually were. But remembering the tears dripping off of his lashes, you realized how hurtful those words thrown at his must had been. And while you thought about this all, Jeongguk took your hand, pried open your fingers and fished out of his pocket a small banana milk. 
Ka-eun, the it-girl of the high school. Jeongguk protected her reputation, in spite of the fact that she didn’t deserve it at all. 
That was the kind of person Jeongguk was. 
It wasn’t the only encounter you had with him. He would smile at you and greet you while passing you in the halls. Would put banana milks sometimes on your desk early in the morning. Would sit beside you at lunch when he wasn’t on speaking terms with her. And he would confide in you while knowing nothing about you. 
That’s the reason why you can’t call your intertwinement with Jeongguk a friendship. Certainly not, after the person he became when uni life spread its roots in yours and his and he chose the one opposite of yours. 
The faculty of medicine stood facing your faculty of philosophy and literature, and Jeongguk, wearing his green scrubs and his oversized hoodie, would meet you during lunch breaks, insisting that you spend it together because he didn’t know anyone else and he was too anxious to meet new people because of what Ka-eun put him through. 
But Jeongguk didn’t eat. Not so much like he used to. 
The trauma and the difficulty of his field forced him to turn to cigarettes. And him blowing out the smoke the other way so you don’t inhale it while eating your lunch made another twig, another wing begin to grow on your tree within your chest for him. 
You didn’t love him, but he was kind to you and he meant something to you. You never loved a man, besides Yoongi and Dostoyevsky. And Jungkook puffing out the smoke like that, he reflected Yoongi and his brotherly love for you in a way that made you dream. Dream about a romantic love that everyone else seems to have so easily, except for you. About that romantic love you read about in your favorite Dostoyevsky book White Nights. 
But perhaps the affinity you had for Jeongguk was some kind of love that the books haven’t written about, at least later on. A kind of non-romantic love that you, yourself, came up with. A love that meant nothing in this world, but everything to you. A love that blazed up like the tip of Jeongguk’s cigarette that he lit up for you at the beginning of autumn of this year, letting you try it out just because he felt like it. 
Another first that has become a habit. 
You didn’t have money of your own to spend it on packs of cigarettes, but Jeongguk did. And he’s never been the kind of person who was stingy. He would give himself if he could, and it completes him—the act of giving and the other person’s response of receiving. 
His eyes burst with light at this very moment, a few months later, just like they did the first time when he lit up a cigarette for you. Though this time, you don’t need his help. You feel their heat, in the middle of this frosty bus stop, as he watches you place the cigarette he pulled up from his pack for you, his own hanging from his lips, unlit. He always waits for you to light up your own first like the gentleman he is, but something about his gaze is different. You sense their intensity, their foreign, foreign intensity that you don’t think is meant for you. And when you take that first puff, you expect it to leave you—like you’ve learned that it always does—but for some reason it doesn’t. 
There’s depth to the eye contact once you reciprocate it. Murkiness descends upon the pair of you, the sun parting ways with the day in a much quicker way that you still haven’t gotten used to. And along with it, a light layer of snow begins to fall. 
Something is meaningful about it—like it should be written down. Jeongguk’s eyes of lingering seriousness, pensive. The snowflakes that settle upon his ebony hair. How silky they must be to the touch. Always so poofy and voluminous. 
Your hands itch to write and Jeongguk doesn’t ask for his pink lighter back. He merely keeps staring, and you start to think that maybe something is weighing his heart heavily. Something personal that he will soon pour out. Like he always does. 
You’re the listener, never the talker, but something inside you urges you, strangely, to make the first move. Get him talking, get him smoking, so he can go home, go to bed and awake with a fresh consciousness, ready to be filled with anatomy, sicknesses and all the other stuff he needs to cram. 
The hand that longs to write lifts, and it feels natural. It feels natural to flick your thumb on the lighter and call fire to life. It feels natural when Jeongguk purses his lips, lifting the cigarette in the process, and holds it up for you while his hands remain warm in the pockets of his oversized black jacket. It feels natural to watch him suck in, the cheeks that carry too many memories of his tears hollowing out. 
And for a second that is too brief, you let your soul imagine what it would be like… to have Jeongguk as your boyfriend. 
To have the full, ceaseless measure of his love. The one that is meant for the better people, but not for you. 
To have his hands touch your skin in a way that would convey what he feels for you— 
“Have you told your brother yet?” 
Too, too brief, that second. Internally, you take your imagination and sew it shut with a pink thread. Pastel pink, like his lighter. 
The question aches as if you pricked your heart with the needle. You haven’t told Yoongi that you smoke one cigarette a day with a boy after school. You haven’t even told your journal. All in fear that the only life you ever managed to experience out of the realm of your books would simply disperse, never to be found again. 
In fear that Yoongi would be mad and you’d add another layer of stress on top of his already high pile. In fear that he would yell at you like your father did over meaningless things. 
“No,” you respond, softly, dropping your gaze to the ashy tip of your cigarette, flicking it off. The prickling sensation deepens as the iciness of the weather grows. You shiver, sighing. The tree in you does as well. “I’ll never tell him. Never—”
“Never in a million years,” he finishes for you, and your mouth parts in the overwhelming realization that you were wrong. 
Jeongguk does know something about you. He remembers that this is a sentence that repeats in your vocabulary multiple times a day. And there’s such intimacy to it, him knowing this, him finishing the sentence for you, him being educated in the matter that bears your name. 
Or perhaps not. Perhaps you’re too starved of any male attention, love and touch. 
Your imagination in you fights against the seam. 
“What happens if he sees you?” Jeongguk asks, and you pause before replying. Take a puff of your cigarette, watch as a miniscule star of mischief begins to live within the macadamia chocolate of his eyes—as if the principle of him secretly corrupting you utterly enthralls him. You picture that’s what he smells like underneath all those clothes of his, your imagination poking a finger through the seam. And you let it—you let it grasp you because it’s stronger than you. 
Macadamia, musk, cedarwood. 
The kind of lustful smell that is dark to the sight, but innocent in its core. 
Behind him, the blue murkiness fully evens out, no hint of the sun’s coloring painting its corners with positivity. Pessimism abides, and you feel it burying itself into your literature-woven bones. 
You’ve been waiting twenty minutes for the bus, Jeongguk even longer for his. The roads are long and empty, darkening the longer you stand here. The snow forms a firm layer on the ground, and you already anticipate Yoongi’s anger-infused worry, crawling all over you. 
You turn to look at Jeongguk, your blood flow at full halt. 
“War happens, Jeongguk,” you say, swallowing thickly. “If Yoongi and I see each other outside of the walls of our house.”
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absolutebl · 4 months ago
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Meet You At the Blossom - Watch Along
Maybe a trash watch? We will find out.
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But first what do we know about this show?
Well, I can't for the life of me remember the title. The article placement it too weird so it will henceforth be called Blossom okay?
Here's what I learned from @renafire
Duck daddy!!!!! I bring news! China didn't kill the gays! Meet You at the Blossom is an HEA! Golden retriever XiaoBao x ice prince Huaien (who gets the shit stabbed out of him an awful lot for being a ML). A side CP of dumb, pretty bodyguard x eccentric doctor. The background plot was basically a bunch of middle age men fighting about the ML's long dead mother. Needles! So many needles! (It was practically a sickfic tbh) Flapping sleeves! Flowing hair! Poison! Politics! A villain weirdly into kites! Prisoners in chains you can easily slip your hand through! Dimples! Loyal bodyguards becoming family! It's not the best thing ever, but it ends happily! There was even a line about "true love has nothing to do with gender" which I feel like is a big deal for something associated with China?
This convinced me to watch, so I thought I'd just post it verbatim to convince you, too.
So I'd refused to watch Blossom because I assumed the leads would die or at least be torn asunder at the end, and that there would be no kisses.
So this Watch Along is going to be me eating crow.
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China pretty much always does censored BL (when they do it at all) since 2017 or so. You can watch something like My E-Sports Genius Brother for the style of "happy but censored BL" that I've grown to expect from China. (Although I wouldn't necessarily recommend it.)
They didn't used to do this! Time once was that China was this chaotic minefield of tasty mess meets terrible tropes (like kidnapping, stepbrothers, rape, whipping boy, and dub con). I had a weird love for it at the time because it was the Wild Wild World of BL beck then and I didn't know to expect better.
I come from 90s Yaoi. Remember?
Ah the bad old days. (You can read a history of CBL here. Not updated in ages.)
Where was I?
So, what I knew about Blossom was that it was a Wuxia BL and that it was made with Thailand, or for Thailand, or something to do with Thailand (there is Thai script on the promo material) and that it wasn't being distributed inside Mainland China. (I still worry about the actors but that's kinda a natural state for me and BL outside of Japan.)
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Outside of China Blossom got wide distribution showing up everywhere iQIYI (China based), Viki (Japan based), Gaga (Taiwan based) WeTV (US Based) and YouTube (Thai Channel Artop Media is serving it).
It also looks like Heavenly is involved and they are Korea based. So like, everyone had their mitts on this thing. We live in crazy times.
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Okay so, here are my 20 expectations:
Pony tails with a ribbon or two
Lots of questionable older tropes, especially dub-con & kidnapping (the herb that makes you horny maybe?)
Flowing filmy robes wafting everywhere
EXTREMELY PRETTY men, costumes, make up, setting... well, everything
No consent whatsoever
Pokey pokey, but not with the right kind of swords (a naked blade will be grabbed by a naked hand, sadly also not in the preferred way)
A bodyguard hotter than he has any right to be, wearing black
Floaty fighty fighty, including but not limited to: skid backwards through puffs of dust, a leap to land + one knee down + holding sword + head bowed, a twirly protect baby from baddies
A boat in a lotus pond
Poison, probably green, glittery if I'm lucky
Circular architecture
A big fuck off fan
Puppy-cat pairing
They wander through bamboo, sit down at the edge of a lake, probubly on a log
Wound tending, of course, because there will be lots of wounds
Someone pushed onto a platform bed (also kneeling in front of it)
A jail with straw in it
Older men with sparse beards detracting from the romance
Fruit or some other food being thrown
Some serious SLEEVE action.
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Li Le as Zong Zheng Huai En
Probably the reserved unhinged one. Has sword, will prod.
He has a solid track record of shows under his belt. So to speak. One wonders how they persuaded him to do BL. He sure is pretty tho.
Wang Yun Kai as Jin Xiao Bao
The son of the wealthiest man in the Jiangnan region, probably the cheerful cute one.
He's an entirely green actor.
Most of the cast is from mainland China, with the exception of Achi Sukonlaphat Sribubpha, who is Thai (obvs) and under Artop Media.
Nancy Chen is directing
She is a Taiwanese director and screenwriter, who directed HIStory 4 and HIStory 5 (neither all that great) and was behind very queer friendly Pappy & Daddy.
I wouldn't call her a stellar director. I would say I've been reserving judgement, but if you pin me down I'd call her Taiwan's New.
Pitch
Xiao Bao (cute) falls in love with icy, white-robed stunner Huai En due to an unexpected meeting. Discovers she is actually a boy (and a baddie). Hijinx ensue.
Adapted from the novel Hua Kai You Shi Tui Mi Wu Sheng 花开有时, 颓靡无声 by Shui Qian Cheng 水千丞
Co-production with China and Taiwan. But the country of origin is listed as Thailand.
12 Episodes, 40 min each (or so) for a total fresh content run time of 8 hours.
Aired: Jul 11, 2024 - Aug 15, 2024 on iQiyi, Viki, WeTV, Gaga
Shall we get started?
I had a surfeit of options since Viki, Gaga, and iQIYI all had Blossom. I like Viki's interface best, want to support Gaga the most, but in this case, I opted for iQIYI because... screen shots. So it's all your fault.
EPISODE 1: Nicknames, pretty men, dimples, twirly, stabby, floof!
I don't like the intro music, it's too slow and tinkly, but classic for the genre I suppose. Still I'm fast forwarding through all the falling cherry blossoms.
All right. Now it's about time for... YES...
Emperor Infodump
Chancellor of Extraneous Explanations
As You Know Bo
Sorry sorry. The puns must flow.
The deets: layabout emperor = chaos & suffering. New emp = strong & popular but his baby bro wants to rule. New emp exiles bro to obscurity. New emp = good ruler. Order established through patriarchal dominance. Children laughing in the street. Got it.
I will not be remembering names, FYI.
We open on kid in trouble over a kite killed(?) by baddie.
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Enter pretty spangled skippy puppy McDimples. I shall call him Dimples. Dimples = spoiled rich kid having trouble finding a wife - presumably because they all know he gay.
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Enter hottie evil cut-glass cheekbones McPoutypants. Haven't decided what I shall call him. It'll come to me.
Extremely pretty men. CHECK.
Ooo, a big hat on horse back!
Of course, how could I not have had that trope on my checklist? My bad.
And a bunch of assassins slow-dropping out of trees like lazy fruit. I forgot that, too.
I gotta say, fairy prince or high elf is not a bad moniker for twirly-sword cheekbones supreme.
Floaty fighty fighty! CHECK
Oh, I thought they'd go in for crossdressing at the very least but I guess they went for Dimples is an idiot instead. Interesting choice. I see we also have the "baby is a clumsy bunny" trope all set to deploy. Carry on.
Grab the sword and skid through the dirt. CHECK!
And a fainting!
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Pony tail with ribbons. CHECK
Dimples might be a bit too much of a prat and an idiot for me.
[Have begun watching at 1.25 speed. Don't fault me.]
I always find the orange/yellow eye makeup that Cdramas put on characters of questionable morality fascinating. Why those colors specifically? And why eye makeup specifically?
We arrive home. It fancy. Daddy doesn't want an unknown lady for his baby (silly daddy, ladies are for ladies, boys are for boys).
Everyone acknowledging that elf prince is, in fact, The Prettiest is very pleasing to me.
Meanwhile, there is some kind of list/stuff/thingy and Prince Shen wants it and is a bad guy, maybe? I can't remember names from the beginning so I have no idea what's going on with the plot but also, it is only going to get more convoluted. Plus the weekend is coming so I'll eventually be drinking and watching this. Plot is for people who don't like BL. And don't have six bottles of sake in their fridge.
Snicker.
Where was I?
Oh yes. Judiciously NOT following the plot.
Dimples and his 2 enablers seem to share about 1/3 of a braincell between them. But they're sincere about it.
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Engage secret identity trope and the expected cross dressing.
Ooo Shen is The Prettiest's uncle? Damn it I'm trying to follow the plot again. Must not get sucked into plot. This is a Cdrama therein lies madness. Ah, Prettiest is the son of the emperor's exiled younger bro? Got it.
Twirly protect baby from baddies! CHECK
And that's episode 1 in the bag. In the sheath?
My thoughts so far:
This couldn't be more exactly what I expected if it tried. I mean it is trying. And it's succeeding in being a Wuxia BL. So. Yay! Performing to the packaging. I appreciate that in a show.
I'm looking forward to more.
(On the advice of one of my spies I've switched to watching on YT when I can, YT and Gaga are supposed to have the better subs than iQIYI and Viki. That said I found iQIYI's serviceable.)
EPISODE 2: Checking a bunch of stuff off my list in rapid succession
Poisoning?
No. Sex herb? CHECK
Discovery that she is in fact he?
Dominance Tussle? Dub con? Rape? Already? CHECK
Well that came fast (presumably so did he).
There’s a lot happening all at once at the beginning of just ep 2. 
It’s an ACCOUNT BOOK that’s causing all this fuss? Hilarious. 
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Enter the anticipated hottie (bodyguard? spy?) in all black wearing a hedgehog. CHECK
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(I didn’t expect the hedgehog, I have to admit.)
Oh is the single brain cell society is trying to grow additional brain cells? That's not gonna work.
Cheekbones is still the prettiest.
Oh HELLO stern grabby Daddy not-older brother of yummy. We likey.
Who do you belong to?
Why do you have The Biggest Sleeves?
Do I take that as a sign of gayness?
Please? 
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Ooo looks like I’m right. 
Also this is very silly.
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And "I never said she was a woman."
It’s just so funny.
OH NO!
Stern prince bro is leaving already?
I only had Grabby McDaddy for a very short length of time. I already miss him. 
Meanwhile, Dimples apparently has no compunction about being in love with a man, we blew through a bisexual identity crisis while I wasn't looking, and now we exist inside the gay=okay bubble? I did not expect The Bubble(tm) to show up in a Wuxia, but I guess this is a BL universe and we all just float around in it… 
Cheekbones is a bit of an asshole. Quite apart from the, ya know, bit of rapey rape thing.
I also did not have absolutely terrible VO dubbing on my bingo card. I forgot about that one in Cdramas.
EPISODE 3: Distracted by the pretty
Some kind of dark past for dimples and his little (not blood ) sister. 
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Sniff test, the greatest trope of 2024 apparently. Nice to see the execution of a modern trope in a vintage style BL.
Aa ha! Kneeling next to a platform bed. CHECK
And more poisoning and drugs.
Wound tending. CHECK
Aweeeee Dimples is worried about Cheekbones! How cute.
Also, the ice queen appears to be melting.
Ooo. More sexitimes? Consensual this time. Okay. I guess Taiwan did get its nuts all over this show. (Honestly, that was a mistype but I'm keeping it in.)
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The bit with all the bodyguards was great.
And my love for Mr. All-Black Clued-in Hottie persists.
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We are now in the “does he like me back?” phase of the high school narrative. We are also in the "do I like him at all?" part of the narrative. Suddenly, this is an angsty YA. 
Ice queen has melted and is now turning into jelly. (Can you tell I’m very pleased with myself and this metaphor?) 
And now, Dimples is sick?
Boy, is this fast moving! I have to say, that is something I did not expect at all. Usually Cdramas are much slower than this.
I do love how shameless D imples is. It’s kind of delightful. He’s definitely in his bisexual awakening slut phase.
Cheekbones is also a doctor, apparently. Useful man. 
In other news: I would really like to add a full length crossover wafting robe into my wardrobe. I have no idea why I feel compelled by such a thing.
EPISODE 4: Gay sleeves AT last
Not a lot happened in this episode. Mostly flirting. More backstory and plot that doesn’t really matter. Presumably this intended to be character motivation?
We do not need him to be motivated we need him to be pretty. Understand the brief please.
Why no more floaty floaty sleeves?
Oooo, because sleeves in gay! CHECK
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I did like the scene of the blood being cleaned up after the assassination attempt(?). It’s kind of nice to see that depicted for a change. I always worry about all that blood on that nice stone work.
Oh the handholding it was very cute.
Ice queen has melted and now turned entirely to jelly. Very very jelly.
Dimples is so stupid proud of his tall deadly wife. It's flipping adorable in a very goofy way.
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I guess Cheekbones has come around and now Dimples has officially been claimed, multiple times and in multiple ways. He can't change his mind or anything now. Trouble is afoot...
asleeve?
ahead...
ahem.
I'll stop now.
EPISODE 5 - It is a Thing I guess?
OMG Cheekbones just loves his stilly bint of a bf. It’s absolutely absurd. The ultimate puppy/cat pairing.
I love it that he’s just casually walking around with a knife sticking out of his back and only cares that baby may have gotten a splinter in his finger.
Now we are in the vows portion of the early romance. I am assuming betrayal is coming soon? 
Grabby McDaddy! I missed you! Here to perform the part of Basil Exposition I see? No grabby for me? Sad. Unfortunately, if you aren’t flirting with a man I’m going to be fast forwarding. Although your sleeves are very nice.
Uh oh, Dimples is in trouble. 
Okay that was that. No screen caps, I lazy.
EPISODE 6 - DOOOMMMM
Oh lovely. More rape. I guess Dimples went looking for that response? Is that the implication? Does Dimples have a rape kink? What is with this show? 
No brothels for a baby I guess.
It’s not gay... it’s poison? 
It’s not bisexuality... it’s the slut herb? 
The single brain cell club is now the wailing fates. 
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I guess cutting off a man’s hand out of jealousy is no biggie? Well this is a BL. Jealousy is the #1 excuse!
Fighty floaty blood spatter death! This time on wooden planks. Those are impossible to get clean. 
Meanwhile, there’s a lot of backstory and stuff I don’t care about, and probably can’t follow even if I did care about it.
I don’t like the Emperor at all. But then I don’t think I meant to. I am a little shocked that there aren’t more men with sparse beards distracting from the romance. But I guess this is a BL, they go for youth even in wuxia.
EPISODE 7 - You know what they say about a man with big sleeves?
Oh, Daddy McGrabby is back and he's a good guy (?)! He’s also in love with Dimples. 
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Oh no!
What is this sensation I feel being thrust upon me?
Is that…? Is that second lead syndrome?  I think it is.
Oh well, it was fated the moment I saw the length of his... sleeves in episode 2.
Meanwhile?
Dimples gets tortured by acupuncture. 
Poisonings are always so elegant and classy in Cdramas.
Blah blah captured rescued captured rescued again sort of. Cheekbones is now seriously imperiled. We swap one for the other in Grave Danger (TM).
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Enter the Divine Doctor character! Who (Dr) I have been told reliably by previous witnesses is A Favorite. I do love this particular archetype (quirky healer wise beyond his years - sometimes actual immortal. ) I am prepared to be delighted.  
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EPISODE 8 - Divine Doctor is Emperor of the Gays
The divine doctor and 1/3 brain cell is not a pairing I thought was going to happen. Frankly it doesn't seem like the writers thought about it much either.
But it did make me laugh out loud.
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It’s fantastic. I love them. I love this for me. I love a secondary couple for this show. Carry-on.
I LOVE THE DOCTOR SO MUCH. 
Everyone was absolutely correct. He is the best character. He is my favorite. He is openly gay and a troublemaker and absolute queen. And I adore him forever. No notes.
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King Emperor behavior!
The evil crown prince has a crush on Daddy McGrabby. With good reason, he does have the biggest sleeves.
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(I have a crush on Daddy McGrabby.) And he clearly likes brats, so I think the crown prince is in with a chance, actually.
(Not me, sadly. Despite the rumors I am not a brat. I make no case for this.)
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EPISODE 9 - The Plot Thickens like Shampoo
Oh, Cheekbones is the new crown prince? We have a whole Snape situation going on here?
And finally Cheekbone knows what is happened to his poor little tortured Dimples. (oof that acting tho. before you say "what acting" i KNOW.)
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In all honesty, I’m quite engaged by the drama of the show at this point and kind of losing my snark because of it. Don't get mad at me.
It’s not a bad show. I mean it’s a melodramatic soap opera, but that’s to be expected. It's so soapy it's like one of those extra foamy soap dispenser soaps.
To be entirely fair most gay men of my acquaintances have very similar relationship trajectories. Minus some of the casual murder (aside from character assassinations of course). 
EPISODE 10 - Oh Noes All Round
Not enough of my beloved divine doctor emperor of the gays. But you can’t have everything. 
Oh noes, my babies are fighting. 
But he brought you a big thistle! Don't fight!
Oh they get to kind of make up, or something. It’s sweet. Puppy Dimples accidentally caught himself a psychopath. To be fair tho, all cats are psychopaths at heart.
Oh noes Daddy McGrabby is planning on killing Cheekbones. No Daddy. Not the Cheekbones!
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The cheek kiss from Cheekbones was so romantic. Normally I’m not a huge fan of this particular smooch, but under these circumstances it was very good.
EPISODE 11 - So Many Gay Emperors no one cares about the actual emperor
I wish I could shut somebody up by a simple double tap to the collarbone. It’s like the wuxia version of a block feature on tumblr.
Meanwhile, the part where 2/3 of a brain cell are comparing how hot their respective fierce gay emperors are to each other is truly hilarious. I actually clapped.
This is so ridiculous.
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Epic eye roll from the remaining 1/3 of a brain cell. And I have to say I’m on his side in this matter.
Oh noes Daddy McGrabby is not, in fact, on the side of twrew lurve after all.
How sad. 
EPISODE 12 - The Bisexual In the Bathtub & other nursery rhymes of my youth
I love this silly bint of a bisexual in the bath between two fierce gay dudes who are about to give their life force to keep him alive.
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Someone definitely once drew this as Lord of the Rings fanart 20 years ago.
I guess our single brain cell has been torn asunder. And Daddy McGrabby never did get his man.
Next series?
Bing him back to me.
With EVEN BIGGER SLEEVES!
IN CONCLUSION
All cards on the table?
This was undeniably a wuxia and most definitely a BL.
Evil stunning princely Cheekbones meets and falls in love with the bisexual Disaster dimples of his dreams. There’s a lot of floaty fighting, tangled plot, and overworked emotions. From start to finish it was exactly as it claimed to be, including more than the expected amount of sexual claiming.
I’m not wild about the wuxia genre, but I will tell you what I do like:
Very pretty men in flowing robes + eye makeup + hair ribbons wafting about stabbing and kissing each other plus ridiculous soap opera machinations. I also like cheekbones and dimples. AND I love a stupid gay sleeve, okay? There was also truly epic levels of stink-eye, and that too is to be lauded.
This show left me grinning like crazy. Was it great? Not really, but it was a great experience and I enjoyed it immensely.
I’m so glad you all persuaded me to watch it in the end.
Thank you! 
I should probably give it an 9/10 because I had such a good time watching it. But I’m not going to, because it isn’t a 9/10 drama. It had a lot of flaws chewing at that pretty (boom mic riddled) scenery, not to mention all the rapey rape.
It’s a solid 8/10
(source)
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eyesofbong · 3 months ago
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A Chrollo x F!Hunter Reader Fic | Summary
Best advised to be read in dark mode. AO3 link coming soon!
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★ 18+ MDNI WARNINGS: descriptive murder, burning of corpses, torture?, arson, slight implication of attempted suicide, gore, blood, violence, strong mentions of sexual abuse towards children including human trafficking, implied kidnapping, perversion of innocence, predators, CP, and implied rape. (NO I DO NOT ENDORSE THE ABUSE OF CHILDREN. it is only briefly mentioned since it is disgusting to keep the story realistic and strictly used as awareness since this is actual problems in the real world they don't just kidnap children. I WILL NEVER! write about non-con with underage characters or children, rape, and assault.) ★
☆ word count. 8.9k (sheeeesh had to hold back on somethings)
✥ Chapter Summary: Lost in the shadows of your despair, haunted by memories of the children you once saved, you find yourself drifting further from your purpose. But when a call from Chairman Netero breaks the silence, you're pulled back into a world you thought you'd left behind, drawn into the unknown for one last round — for the sake of saving a young man from making the same mistakes you did. ✥
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The church was still, bathed in the soft glow of flickering candles. You remained in the pew, feigning prayer, while your mind wrestled with turbulent thoughts.
But before you found yourself here, in this quiet sanctuary, there was a journey—a path that led you back to the world you had once left behind.
“You can’t save them all.”
The words echoed in your mind—a truth you had grappled with for most of your life. So why was it so hard to accept that cruel reality? Why did you live your life the way you did? Most people would argue that they wish they had your power and skills. But they didn’t understand. They couldn’t comprehend the burden that came with such strength.
Why would anyone want to carry that weight for so long?
Power is a double-edged sword. If you aren’t corrupted by it, you’re crushed beneath its weight. How easy it is to destroy rather than create.
You often wondered why Netero had chosen you that day. What did he see first—the helpless child who had lost everything or the Hunter who would grow into his greatest soldier?
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You trailed behind the men, each step leading you deeper into the belly of this vile place. They had no idea you were not one of them, no clue that every word you spoke and every move you made was part of a carefully laid trap. The air around you was thick with malice, a foul concoction of despair, fear, and predatory intent.
Since taking the head of your family’s killer, there has been a void in your heart—one you filled with vengeance.
But now, you had a new purpose: to use your power to hunt down the worst of humanity, like this network of mafia traffickers.
Suddenly, your senses sharpened. You heard it—a soft, muffled cry—the children.
The group leader, a man with greasy hair and a twisted grin, laughed. “You hear them, little rascals?” he sneered, gesturing ahead with a perverse pride. “Got a fresh batch of chicklings just yesterday. Innocent, full of life... worth a lot more in certain markets, if you catch my drift..."
A wave of revulsion swept over you, but you kept your face steady, fighting internally the burning in your throat.
Sick bastards. That’s all they were to you. There was nothing more vile than preying upon children, tearing away their innocence, and selling their pain.
Once, you had believed killing was always wrong. But when faced with monsters like these, death seemed like the only solution.
“That shouldn’t be a problem, right, Mistress?” The leader’s voice was thick with expectation, his beady eyes studying you for any sign of weakness.
You met his gaze with a cold, calculated, calm one. “The price is no problem, but I’ll need to see the ‘quality’ of the children you speak of to ensure they’re worth it,” you replied, playing along with his sick game. He grinned, his yellowed teeth bared like a predator sensing victory.
“Of course, my lady, right this way,” he said, gesturing for you to follow him up a rickety flight of stairs.
As you ascended, you noticed the tapes scattered on the floor—stacks of them carefully labeled and arranged. Your heart sank at the sight. You knew exactly what they were: recordings of abuse. Child pornography is waiting to be sold and distributed. Evidence of what these children had endured and what they were being forced to relive in the most horrific way possible.
Images of small, terrified faces pinned to the walls, some in tears, others with expressions frozen in fear, burned into your mind. You forced yourself to keep moving, to keep your eyes forward, your face blank. Every fiber of your being screamed for you to lash out, but you had to stay focused. You had to see this through.
When you reached the top, he led you to a door and pushed it open with a creak. Inside, the children were huddled together, wide-eyed and trembling. At the front stood a small boy with big gray eyes—"The runt." of the group. His clothes were torn, dirt smeared on his cheeks, but there was something in his gaze—a spark of defiance that hadn’t yet been snuffed out. The other children seemed to hover protectively around him, even in their weakened states.
“Well, what do you think of these little lambs?” the leader asked, his voice dripping with mock sweetness. “Aren’t they precious?”
You glanced at the children, your heart aching. For a split second, your gaze softened when you saw the small, porcelain-skinned boy, his eyes locked onto yours. He seemed to sense something in you, something different. You took a slow, steady breath, and without moving your lips, you mouthed, “I’m here to help.”
The boy’s grip on the bars loosened slightly. Hope flickered in his big gray eyes. You could feel the children’s fear and desperation mingling with a fragile thread of trust. They were so small, so fragile, yet somehow still fighting.
“They are precious,” you murmured, your voice taking on a steely edge. “But not in the way you’re thinking.”
The men’s laughter faltered. They sensed the shift, but too late. You moved swiftly, raising your hand. A wall of stone shot up from the ground, separating the children from their captors. Panic spread among the men as they scrambled for their weapons, but you were already moving.
With a flick of your wrist, a vine extended from the stone wall, and in its grip, a sword was handed to you. The blade flashed, slicing through the air. In one swift motion, you severed their hands before they could draw their guns. Blood spattered against the walls, and the men screamed.
“You crazy bi—” one of them began, but his voice was cut off as you grabbed his face. Nen flames flared from your palm, melting his skin. His screams turned to a hideous, gurgling cry as you slammed him against the wall, against a picture of him touching one of the children.
“My flames are nothing compared to the ones you’ll face for eternity,” you said, your voice cold and unwavering.
"THE DEVIL! YOU'RE THE DEVIL!" he shrieked, his voice cracking in terror.
“YOU’LL GO TO HELL TOO!” another screamed.
You tilted your head slightly, unbothered. “I know,” you replied calmly. “And I’ll be right there with you... to make sure you suffer.”
With a final, furious surge of nen, you let the flames consume him, his body twitching as the fire took hold. One by one, the men fell, their screams swallowed by the inferno of your rage.
The air thickened with the stench of burning flesh, but all you felt was a calm, cold satisfaction. You took a deep breath, letting the fire die down, leaving only smoldering ashes behind.
The floor was now slick with blood, staining everything it touched. You closed your eyes and focused, drawing on your nen, the energy that flowed through your very being. You felt a ripple within yourself, a gathering of moisture in your veins, pulling towards your fingertips. With a single thought, you summoned it forth.
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A small, shimmering blob of water began to form, hovering just above your palm. It glistened with a faint blue hue, infused with your nen—your life force flowing through it. The water was more than liquid; it was an extension of your will, a manifestation of the purity and cleansing you desired.
You moved your hand slowly, and the blob expanded, reaching toward the crimson stains that pooled on the floor. It touched the blood, and a strange, almost serene reaction occurred. The nen-infused water seemed to drink up the blood, absorbing it into its depths, turning it from a crystalline blue to a dark, murky red. It quivered and shifted, gathering every last drop, until the floor was clean.
Once it was done, you flicked your wrist, and the blood-tainted water dissipated into steam, evaporating into the air. The scent of iron and smoke faded, leaving behind only the faintest whisper of moisture.
You turned to the vine still hanging from the wall. “Take the corpses to another room,” you said softly. “I don’t want the children to see this.”
The vine extended, wrapping around the charred remains and dragging them away, leaving the room clear. You watched it go, feeling a pang of sorrow in your chest. “I’m sorry, Mother,” you whispered, “but someone has to purge the evil, right?”
The vine nodded as if in understanding and vanished into the shadows.
With the room now clear, you lowered the stone wall, allowing the children to see. They were still huddled together, wide-eyed, trembling, but there was a new light in their eyes—a glimmer of hope.
You kneeled, using a tiny flame to illuminate the room gently. “You’re safe now,” you said softly, your voice switching to a delicate tone.
The small, marble-eyed boy stepped forward. His hand slipped into yours, his grip surprisingly strong for his size. “You back came for us?” he whispered, his voice shaking but resolute.
You nodded, squeezing his hand gently, a warm smile breaking through your hardened expression. “Always.”
The children began to move toward you, timid at first, then with growing confidence, their small hands reaching out, seeking comfort. For now, at least, they were safe.
And you would make sure it stayed that way.
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It was mostly your funding that kept the orphanages in Meteor City from crumbling. Your money was funneled into the broken, forgotten corners of the city where children like Chrollo and his friends sought refuge. You couldn’t always be there, but when you were, you made it count—your presence, your touch, your attention. That was the difference, wasn’t it? You had to put your wealth somewhere, after all—unlike Ging or Pariston, whose fortunes seemed to disappear into the wind, chasing their whims. For you, though, Meteor City had become an escape, a place to atone for the things you couldn’t control.
But it was more than duty, wasn’t it?
Chrollo had bonded to you in a way that you hadn’t expected. The other children admired you, but he worshiped you. His innocence clung to you, unsettling and infectious, dragging you into a world where, for brief moments, you almost believed you could be more than just a Hunter. That you could be someone who stayed.
It was one of those quiet, unguarded moments when you found yourself in Meteor City again, his small, frail body curled up against yours on his bed, his head tucked beneath your chin as if he could melt into your very being. His face pressed into your chest, and his small hands clung to your shirt as if you were his entire world.
“Stay with me,” he murmured, his voice soft, pleading. His wide gray eyes blinked up at you, still so full of that childlike adoration that made your chest tighten painfully. He didn’t understand—how could he? He was too young, too innocent.
You combed your fingers through his shaggy, jet-black hair, pretending it didn’t hurt to hear him ask. Pretending it didn’t make you feel like you were betraying something inside yourself. The glow from the window—the familiar golden light of dawn—signaled your impending departure. Mother Nature, it seemed, always knew when it was time to pull you away. You would have to leave again. You always left.
But not yet.
“Okay,” you whispered, the lie slipping from your lips like it always did. “I’ll stay.” You tucked his head back against your chest, hoping to drown his fears in the safety of your embrace. He felt so small compared to you, so fragile. You held him tighter, but no matter how tightly you cradled him, you knew it wouldn’t be enough. You couldn’t stay.
He sighed, his words soft and filled with frustration. “I wish you were just a normal girl. Not the Great Hunter. They always take you away from me.”
The weight of his words crushed your chest. You swallowed hard, burying the guilt and sorrow that always surfaced in these moments. He was just a boy, after all—a boy who didn’t know what it meant to live a life like yours. His love was simple, innocent, and untainted by the reality that you could never be what he wanted you to be.
He sighed again, his voice thick with sleep. “It’s not fair. You’re just a kid like me, but it’s like... you’re not. You’re stronger, taller... you have magic. You’re not afraid of anything.” His sleepy eyes blinked up at you, half-lidded, his gaze lingering on your face as if you were the only thing keeping him from falling asleep. “You’re so cool, Y/N.”
You forced a smile, your heart aching with every word. How could he say these things so easily, not knowing the storm they stirred within you? You shouldn’t be here. You shouldn’t be feeling this pull toward him, this unbearable conflict between duty and something else—something darker, something you didn’t want to acknowledge.
“I want to be strong like you,” he continued, his voice fading as sleep began to pull him under. “Then I’ll be the one to save you.”
You let out a chuckle, though it felt hollow. “Oh really? I can’t wait to see you try.” Your voice was soft and gentle, as if you could keep him safe from the weight of your feelings. But even as you spoke, your gaze lingered on his longer than it should have. The way his eyes—those innocent gray eyes—held yours made something inside you crack. You didn’t want to look away.
And yet, you had to.
As Chrollo yawned, his body slowly relaxing into the warmth of your embrace, your heart clenched in that familiar, bittersweet way. You knew what was coming next—the moment when he would fall asleep, and you’d have to leave. You always left. He knew it too, even if he didn’t say it. His eyes fought against the sleep pulling him under as if staying awake would keep you there just a little longer.
You should go. You needed to go. But instead, you held him close, brushing your thumb along his cheek, tracing the outline of his pale face. He murmured something so soft, so quiet, you almost didn’t hear it.
“I love you, Y/N.”
Your heart shattered.
The words hung in the air between you, heavy and suffocating. You didn’t respond. How could you? What could you say to that? You weren’t supposed to feel this way. You weren’t supposed to let it hurt. And yet, his innocent words cut deeper than any wound you had ever known.
You didn’t respond. Instead, you cradled his face in your hands, letting the silence fill the space between you. Your mind and heart were at war, clashing violently as you tried to convince yourself that you felt nothing for this boy—nothing beyond duty, beyond the role you were meant to play.
But his words lingered. His love lingered. And it was killing you.
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Only you could carry this burden. You had to ensure that you were the last shepherd, even if you were just a broken saint now.
And when he called, you would answer, no matter how much time had passed since that harrowing incident.
Isaac Netero’s familiar contact flashed onto your phone just as you returned to your quiet estate. The grand home, surrounded by vast lands, had become your sanctuary—where time seemed to stand still. Bamboo trees swayed in the wind, whispering secrets you couldn’t quite hear, and the rustle of leaves was like a lullaby to your broken spirit. This land, untouched and isolated, had become your refuge. Here, you could pretend the world had forgotten you, just as you had tried to ignore it.
You rarely needed to leave; everything you required, you grew with your own hands. The earth was rich and forgiving; the bamboo was tall and kind, your only companions, as well as the critters that inhabited the land, your only solace. They tried to aid in healing your scars, though they only made the loss more bearable. They connected you to reality, keeping you grounded and pulling you back from the edge whenever you felt yourself slipping away. They depended on you as much as you did on them. 
But even Mother Nature, with all her quiet persistence, couldn’t fill the gaping void left by your loss. She could only make the emptiness more bearable, less suffocating.
You had given in to the silence, but she hadn’t given up on you. Yet the moment Netero’s contact appeared, the corpse of your heart couldn’t help but beat with a retired purpose you knew you could no longer fulfill.
Still, your hands, worn and deft, quickly picked up the phone, bringing it to your ear.
“Y/N L/N. Think you have a chance to talk, my dear?”
His familiar, softened gruff voice was a reminder of how time had aged him, even though he had left you with so many unanswered questions. He was still your father in many ways.
But you were now Netero’s little fallen general.
“I’m here,” you replied, your voice a ghost of itself, as if unused to forming words meant for anyone else. “It's good to hear your voice. I would ask, How have you been?”
“I am well, Father,” you cut in, a weary undertone threading through your words. “Trying to keep the ground from swallowing me whole.”
A heavy silence fell between you, a shared history that neither of you wanted to address hanging thick in the air. Netero sighed, his voice dipping into a tone you had not heard in years—gentle, almost pleading. 
“Y/N…”
You remained silent, unyielding, waiting for him to continue.
“Listen to me, just this once,” he started, but you interrupted again, sharper this time, like a blade cutting through the fog.
“My nen is gone, Isaac," you said, each word deliberate and hard. "There’s nothing more to that story. There is no Master of the Hunters anymore.”
The silence that followed was colder, heavier. You could almost hear him wince at the use of his first name, a name you rarely called him. You knew it hurt him—that it stripped away the façade he liked to wear around you.
He hesitated, then took a deep breath, his voice laced with quiet desperation. “I'm not asking for her to listen to me,” he said carefully. “I'm asking for you, Y/N.”
Your gaze drifted to the bamboo outside, watching the stalks bend and sway in the wind. There was a part of you that wanted to hang up, to let the silence consume you once more, but another part—a faint, barely alive spark—kept you on the line.
“There is a young man,” Netero continued, “who is the spitting reincarnation of you."
Your chest tightened, the ache spreading like a slow poison through your veins. You swallowed, but it felt like shards of glass in your throat.
Netero’s voice softened, almost as if he were trying to soothe a frightened child. “I know I pushed you to retire early, and for that, I am sorry,” he confessed, his words heavy with regret. “I couldn’t bear the thought of what might happen if the wrong people found out you had lost your nen. But this boy—he needs someone who can show him the way. Someone who can give him a chance to choose a different path. A scent he can follow.”
He paused, the weight of his words settling into the air between you. “None of us can do that.”
A flicker of frustration sparked within you, threatening to crack the numbness you had wrapped around yourself like armor. You closed your eyes, the familiar heaviness of duty pressing against your chest. "Why... why do you always drag me back, Isaac?" you murmured, your voice almost devoid of emotion, a whisper lost in the wind.
“Because,” he replied softly, his voice steady but filled with quiet insistence, “you lost your nen, but you didn’t lose everything. I couldn’t save you from your fate... but you can save him before he makes the same mistake.”
For a moment, the world outside seemed to be still. The bamboo stopped swaying, the wind held its breath, and even the critters paused their quiet movements. Everything waited for you to decide whether you would let yourself be pulled back into the life you had tried so hard to leave behind.
A slow exhale escaped your lips, and your grip tightened around the phone. Maybe it wasn’t about saving yourself. Maybe it was about saving someone else—just one more time.
“I’ll think about it,” you finally whispered, knowing you were already halfway convinced.
Netero's sigh of relief was almost inaudible, but you felt it—a soft echo in your chest. "That's all I ask," he said gently. "Just think about it."
And with that, the call ended, leaving you standing alone in the quiet of your sanctuary, the wind picking up again, the bamboo swaying once more.
For the first time in a long time, you felt the stirrings of something beyond emptiness—a faint, fragile thing that might have been hope.
You let yourself fall back against the mat, feeling the familiar, frayed edges pressing into your back. Your phone lay loosely in your grip, screen dark, but its weight still anchored you to the moment. You stared blankly at the stone pond before you, the water still and silent under the overcast sky. But inside, that gnawing feeling had grown stronger, louder, and more insistent. The doubt and emptiness you had tried so hard to bury now surged to the surface like a wave, threatening to swallow you whole.
Then you saw her—the familiar, ethereal form rising from the pond—"Mother," your nen-made spirit, tilting her head at you, trying to read the emotions you kept so tightly locked away. Her shape shimmered and wavered, the liquid surface of her body catching the dim light, reflecting a thousand tiny, dancing fragments of your surroundings.
“You’re cruel...” you muttered, not bothering to lift your head. You didn’t need to see her to know she was there, watching you with a concern you could not bear. The water spirit hovered closer, her presence radiating a gentle insistence. A wave of water reached out, almost like a hand, and as she moved, droplets broke away and splattered onto your face. The cool water trickled down your skin, obliging you to finally look up and meet her gaze.
Her expression was unreadable, but the tension in her form, the way her edges seemed to blur and tremble, told you everything. She was worried. She is always worried. Especially when you have attempted to end your suffering...
Seeing her like that... It only made the ache worse. It plagued you and gnawed at you like an open wound. You hated it. You hated feeling like this—so useless, so empty. Once, you had been so certain of your place in the world, so sure of your purpose. You had moved like a blade through the darkness, cutting down every evil in your path. You had saved countless lives and fought battles that others had deemed impossible. You mattered.
And now... now it felt like all of that was gone. Stripped away the moment your nen vanished. When it had left you, it had taken everything with it. Your sense of self, your purpose, your reason for being—it had all crumbled to dust, leaving nothing but a hollow shell behind.
"Quit it," you muttered, your voice low and tired. "I'm not in the mood."
But Mother didn’t listen. She never did. Instead, she moved closer, her form rippling like a soft wave, the water elongating until it seemed to reach across the space between you. With a sudden, playful motion, she curled around your feet, a cold grip tightening around your ankles. Before you could protest, she yanked you off the mat, dragging you across the ground.
“Really?” You groaned, exasperation flaring. You knew what she was doing. She was trying to wake you up, to stir something inside you. “Cut it out, Mother.”
She didn’t respond. The water around your ankles tightened, and with another tug, she lifted you upside down, your hair falling toward the ground. The blood rushed to your head, and you blinked, momentarily disoriented. For a moment, you dangled there like a rag doll over the pond, your feet held aloft by a watery tendril.
You found yourself staring directly into her face—or what passed for a face—her liquid eyes focused intently on you, unblinking, unwavering. She was demanding your attention, forcing you to look at her to confront whatever was buried deep inside. The silence stretched between you, filled only by the gentle slosh of water moving with every slight motion.
“I said quit it,” you repeated, a hint of irritation in your voice. But she didn’t budge. Her expression seemed almost stern. The water droplets that made up her body shivered slightly, as if she were speaking a language only you could understand.
Mother’s form shifted, her eyes narrowing slightly. Her head tilted again, and for a second, she almost seemed to frown. The water that held you up began to twist and turn, slowly spinning you in the air as if examining you from every angle. Her touch was cold, but there was something else there—something gentle, almost comforting, beneath the chill. She wouldn’t let you hide from this. She wouldn’t let you sink back into the darkness you’d been wallowing in for so long.
“Quit it, Mother,” you muttered, voice strained, but there was no real fight in your tone. You were too exhausted to fight her, too tired to do much more than dangle there, your heart heavy and your purpose frayed.
Mother, ever persistent, moved the water around you in a swirl, as if shaping something from the depths of her core. You felt a coldness, a thin sheet of water sliding up to your face, and then you saw it—your reflection mirrored perfectly in the water.
But Mother didn’t stop there. Slowly, deliberately, she turned the reflection around.
Your eyes widened as you caught sight of your own back and your skin. The large, red Hunter symbol emblazoned between your shoulder blades, stark against your flesh, with the L/N family symbols woven underneath, bearing the phrase that had once given you strength:
"No child left behind." 
The words, so familiar, stared back at you with a cruel clarity. Your vow, your creed. The promise you had whispered to yourself a thousand times over, in the darkest nights, in the quiet moments of despair. The very words you had once tattooed onto your skin were like armor against the world.
Your breath caught in your throat. You tried to look away, but Mother twisted the mirror slightly, making sure you couldn’t escape it.
The reminder was as sharp as a blade, cutting through your excuses and your self-pity.
You were The Great Hunter, not because of the nen you wielded, but because of the promise you had made. Because of the innocent you had sworn to protect.
Mother watched, her watery eyes soft but firm, refusing to release you until the weight of that reflection settled back into your bones.
You sighed, a long, tired exhale, and for a moment, just a moment, you allowed yourself to feel the ache of that old purpose stirring within you.
She stared back, unyielding. Her watery surface rippled slightly, as if in response to your unspoken thoughts, and you felt a tear prick at the corner of your eye. A tear you quickly blink away. The silence stretched on, filled with everything you weren't saying—filled with all the things she knew you didn’t want to admit.
You sighed, feeling the fight leave you, your shoulders slumping. “Fine. Fine, you win,” you said quietly, feeling defeated, but in a way that almost felt like relief. She had always been there to stop you from corrupting yourself, always pushing you, always forcing you to face the things you wanted to ignore. And now, as much as you hated to admit it, you needed her to do it again.
You felt her release your ankles, and for a moment, you simply stood there, breathing, your heartbeat slowing, the cool air biting at your skin. She hovered closer, her watery hand reaching out as if to touch your face, but she hesitated, just a fraction of an inch away. You stared into her eyes, feeling something inside you break loose like a dam giving way.
You hated this... You hated feeling like you were nothing. Like you were just a vessel for the person you used to be.
Your Nen was gone, but you were still here. That gnawing, insatiable need to matter, to make a difference, was still there, burning quietly beneath the surface.
You took a breath, your fingers tightening around the phone still in your hand. "Alright," you whispered, almost to yourself. "Alright, I'll do it."
Mother seemed to shimmer, her form brightening slightly as if she were smiling. Her droplets swirled around you, a gentle, swirling dance of liquid light like she was encouraging you, cheering you on.
Your thumb moved over the phone screen, almost of its own accord, and you found Netero’s name again, hesitating for just a heartbeat before you pressed the call button. The phone rang once, twice, and then his voice came through—calm but expectant as if he had known you would call back.
“Y/N?”
You closed your eyes for a moment, steeling yourself, and then spoke, your voice steady. “Where is he?”
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You stepped off the airship, choosing to take a more grounded approach this time. It had been so long since you walked among society; today, you wanted to feel the earth beneath your feet and hear the noise of life all around you. Normally, you would have flown in on Khan, your Seraphrid—a creature resembling a winged horse, only larger and more formidable, a loyal companion since your youth. But today felt different.
As expected, Khan had already beaten you here. His sleek, black form stood tall among the trees, his six powerful legs moving with an elegance that defied his size. His head was turned in your direction, and the two long, string-like antennae that served as his natural bridle extended, sensing your presence. They wrapped around your arm, their touch gentle but firm, syncing with the veins on the underside of your wrist. The bond was immediate, an ancient connection that required no words.
With a familiar pull, you mounted him, his raised hoof serving as a stepping stool, an unspoken offer only the two of you understood. You clicked your tongue softly, a signal you’d always used, and he responded with a low, rumbling neigh that resonated through your bones.
Khan didn’t need instructions. He read your intentions through the link you shared, feeling the subtle shifts in your thoughts and emotions. He began to trot into the dense forest, guided by your thoughts alone, the rhythm of his steps matching the cadence of your heartbeat.
Netero had informed you that the young man, the one you were to meet, was training in these woods. He had given you the young man’s contact information, though he had been elusive with any real details. When you had pressed for more information, Netero had only chuckled, his words tinged with mystery: “You’ll see...”
Typical of him to leave you to uncover the truth on your own, to dig up the bone yourself, like always. As Khan weaved through the thick underbrush, you found yourself wondering about this boy. What was it about him that had made Netero reach out to you after all this time? What was so special that it warranted pulling you back into this world?
The dense forest began to thin, opening into a sun-dappled clearing. Khan slowed to a gentle canter, his antennae twitching as if sensing something ahead. You felt it too—a presence, quiet yet intense, like a heartbeat echoing through the trees.
This had to be the place. As you dismounted, Khan’s gaze remained fixed forward, his body tense and alert. You patted his side, reassuring him, and he relaxed slightly, though his eyes never wavered from whatever lay beyond the clearing.
You took a deep breath, feeling the familiar stir of curiosity and something deeper—something that felt like the whisper of purpose reigniting within you. Stepping forward, you moved into the clearing, ready to meet the young man Netero had sent you to find, ready to face whatever awaited you on the other side.
You dismounted slowly, your feet sinking into the damp earth as the coolness of the soil crept up through your boots, grounding you in the present moment. The clearing before you stretched wide, dappled sunlight breaking through the thick canopy above, casting shifting patterns of light and shadow across the forest floor. The air was thick with the scent of moss and earth, a living, breathing presence around you. Khan stood tall beside you, his powerful form coiled with restrained energy, his antennae twitching in tune with the undercurrent of tension that rippled from you like a stone dropped in water.
Ahead, the low murmur of voices reached your ears, punctuated by the rhythmic clack of wood striking wood and the sharp rustle of leaves disturbed by quick, deliberate movements. You moved forward slowly, cautiously, each step bringing the sounds into sharper clarity. As you reached the edge of the clearing, you paused, taking in the scene before you.
Two figures moved with practiced grace, their forms entwined in a dance of combat, their bodies speaking a language of strength and discipline. One of them, tall and broad-shouldered, had a presence that radiated intensity and control—Izunavi, a hunter you had known from years ago. His sharp, unwavering gaze and the calm precision of his movements marked him as a hunter, one who had taught countless others the art of survival.
But it was the boy who drew your attention.
He was younger than you had imagined, his golden hair catching the sunlight like a halo, his eyes narrowed in concentration, a fierce determination burning in their depths. His posture was taut, muscles coiled and ready, every motion calculated and precise as he mirrored Izunavi’s steps, his gaze never faltering, never leaving his mentor for even a heartbeat. His body moved with the grace of a predator, but there was a tension there—a rawness, a desperation that was almost painful to watch.
So this was Kurapika.
Your breath caught in your throat. It was like staring into a ghost, a specter of who you had once been—a younger self, with that same consuming fire, that same drive, that same reckless need to prove something to a world that had never shown mercy. You recognized the look in his eyes immediately. You had seen it in your reflection, in the faces of those you had saved and those you had failed. The beast of burden lay heavy in his gaze, the weight of vengeance familiar darkness that seemed to clutch at his very soul.
He was still a child. Just as you had been—a child thrust into a world too cruel and too vast, carrying a burden too heavy for shoulders so young. You lingered in the shadows, your heart tightening in your chest, a sense of foreboding curling in your gut. Finally, you decided to step forward, your presence pressing through the air like a ripple in still water.
Izunavi’s movements stilled. He sensed you first, his eyes flickering toward you, his expression a mask of calm neutrality, though you saw the faint recognition behind his eyes. His stance eased, a subtle acknowledgment. Kurapika followed his gaze, turning to face you, and the intensity of his scrutiny hit you like a blow—a look so piercing it seemed to strip away layers, searching, demanding answers before he even spoke.
“Master,” Izunavi greeted, his tone respectful but carrying a hint of something harder beneath. "Netero told me you might be dropping by."
"Y/N," you corrected, voice soft but firm. Each syllable felt heavy in your mouth, burdened by the memories of your past. You inclined your head slightly, stepping fully into the clearing, moving with purpose, though a knot tightened in your stomach. "It’s been a while, Izunavi," you said, your voice sounding almost foreign to your ears. "I see you’ve taken on another pupil."
Izunavi nodded. "One with a special kind of determination," he replied, a note of pride softening his otherwise stern demeanor. He glanced at Kurapika, who stood like a coiled spring, ready to snap. "Kurapika, this is Y/N L/N—once known as Master Hunter, The Great Hunter, the Hound of the Hunters… too many names to count."
Kurapika’s eyes widened slightly at the sound of your name. Recognition flickered across his features—his expression shifting from curiosity to something deeper, something darker. You could almost see the thoughts racing behind his gaze, the questions forming, and the curiosity and anger mingling in a storm of emotion.
Netero had left you a note from the first examiner of the 287th Hunter Exam: "Kurapika Kurta said he wishes to become a Hunter to exact revenge on the Phantom Troupe and seek aid from the Master Hunter." The Phantom Troupe, a name you had only heard in passing, a whisper of a threat, a gang too small to matter back then. But now, seeing Kurapika’s face, you realize how much had changed and how much you had missed.
“Where were you that day?” Kurapika’s voice was low but steady, each word laced with a simmering rage that seemed barely contained. "I read stories about you... Master Hunter, the one who made crime vanish like mist before the sun. When my people were slaughtered, I didn’t fear, because I knew—you would come. You would hunt them down for me."
The pain in his voice was like a knife twisting in your chest. “I waited years for you! Held onto that hope until I had no choice but to become the hunter I needed.”
His voice cracked, but the fury within it did not waver. "You let them walk this earth after what they did to me... to my people." His hands clenched into fists, his knuckles white, his breath ragged. And then you saw it—the flash of scarlet behind his gray contacts, the burning rage of his clan's curse, the anger and grief all mixed into one volatile storm.
A lump formed in your throat, and you swallowed hard against it. The weight of his accusation bore down on you like a physical force. In your absence, the world had shifted and twisted, and you had been powerless to stop it. You had lost your Nen that day, the day you had lost everything.
That’s why you weren’t there.
The same beast of burden now latched onto him had once latched onto you. You had failed him, and his words cut deep into whatever was left of your fractured soul. If only you had known... If only you had hunted them when they were small, a mere whisper of a threat. If only…
But you hadn’t. And now you were facing the result of that failure.
Your silence hung heavy in the air. You felt the burn in your eyes, the sting in your throat, and the weight of every decision and every choice you had made that led to this moment. There was nothing you could say to erase the pain in his eyes—the sense of betrayal that seemed to radiate from him like heat.
Kurapika's expression hardened, his jaw tightening, his eyes narrowing to slits. “I need justice,” he said, his voice colder now, like a blade drawn against a stone.
You drew a deep breath, fighting against the rising tide of emotion within you. “Justice is a fine line, Kurapika,” you replied quietly, meeting his gaze with a steady resolve. “And revenge can blur it until you don’t know which side you’re on.”
His jaw clenched, his eyes burning with a mixture of fury and something deeper—something fragile and almost broken. He turned away, shoulders tense, his footsteps heavy, as if carrying the weight of the world on his back. A part of you wanted to reach out, to stop him, to pull him back from the edge. But you knew better than to force it. He had to find his way, just as you had.
“Kurap-” Izunavi began, his voice edged with concern, but you raised a hand, silencing him. Your eyes remained on Kurapika’s retreating form, watching as he disappeared into the trees, swallowed by the shadows.
“Let him go,” you whispered, the words barely more than a breath. "I’ll talk to him later... once he’s cooled off."
Izunavi hesitated but finally nodded, trusting your judgment. You stared into the forest where Kurapika had vanished, the weight of his words still heavy on your heart. You knew that if he continued on this path, it would lead only to more pain and more loss. You weren’t sure you could bear to watch someone else descend into the same darkness that had swallowed you whole.
You had to try for his sake and yours.
“How far is he in his Nen?” you asked, breaking the stillness. Izunavi turned, his expression solemn.
“He's a determined, quick learner, but he’s already made those terrible vows for his Nen ability. It’s been five months since he started, and he’s planning something for September 1st.”
Next month, you thought. Not much time. “Is it related to the Troupe?”
“Positive.” Izunavi’s response was immediate; his voice edged with tension.
You sighed deeply, feeling the familiar heaviness in your chest. Another lost child, another soul standing at a precipice. The memory of the children from Meteor City flickered in your mind—those small, eager faces filled with both mischief and hope. Even now, you could remember the way they looked up to you, their eyes wide with wonder and something more—something like belief.
Chrollo, Feitan, Phinks—all those troublemakers who had once felt like yours in some way despite being the same age. You had often wondered where they were now, how life had treated them, and if they had stayed on the path you had hoped for them. Maybe, when all of this was over, you’d find them again. Just to see. Just to know.
Izunavi’s voice pulled you back. “His vows are monstrous, Y/N. I don’t know what he sacrificed, but his chains are still out of control. He’s powerful, but he can’t command them yet.”
“Chains?” You repeated, an eyebrow arching in surprise. “That’s his ability?”
Izunavi nodded gravely. “Yes. He wants to bind the spiders to hell with them.”
A small, amused laugh slipped past your lips, as that did sound like something he would say. Then your expression turned serious. “Izunavi… I’ve lost my Nen. If I decide to teach this boy, will you be my eyes?”
Izunavi blinked, momentarily stunned, but he quickly nodded, his gaze steady and filled with a new understanding. “I will,” he promised softly. “But... are you ready for this?”
You took a breath, the weight of your own words settling within you. “I wasn’t Netero’s best hunter just because of my Nen.”
You could still feel Nen, even Mother’s Nen whenever she came to you, like a whisper at the back of your mind, a gentle reminder of the power that once flowed through you like a river. You hadn’t lost your instincts—if anything, losing your Nen had sharpened them. It was like losing a sense and gaining another. You could feel things now, in ways that other Nen users couldn’t—like sensing the shift in the air before a storm.
Izunavi hesitated for a moment, then spoke again, his voice a little softer, a little more unsure. “Y/N, you can do it? Teach him? With your Nen gone…?”
You looked at him, a small smile playing on your lips. “I can.”
Izunavi seemed to consider your words, then nodded again, more firmly this time. “Alright,” he said. “I’ll be your eyes.”
Your gaze drifted toward the direction where Kurapika had stormed off, your thoughts tangled with the past and the present. You knew the path he was on—you had been there yourself once. And you didn’t want Kurapika to stain his hands as you had stained yours, even if it was for what you believed was “good.”
If you could help him find another way—if you could keep his hands clean, you would. You were willing to stain yours all over again for the sake of keeping him from the blood that had already marked too many lives.
You had to operate in his shadow. Teaching Kurapika while also trying to beat him to the Phantom Troupe would be no easy task—especially if you had to do it behind his back. There was still so much you didn’t know. The years you spent disconnected from society left gaps in your knowledge. You couldn’t deny it, and the thought made you clench your fist. At least you could still rely on the physical strength of the L/N bloodline—but even that might not be enough. What if the Phantom Troupe’s Nen abilities were stronger than you anticipated? If they were all together, no matter how much experience you had, they could easily overwhelm you by sheer numbers.
What if you couldn’t protect Kurapika? The thought sent a shiver up your spine.
This was a mess just waiting to explode.
Izunavi watched you quietly, sensing the shift in your mood, the old scars being reopened, and the new purpose forming in your heart. You felt the stirrings of a familiar resolve—a quiet, burning fire that refused to go out.
“Let’s start now,” you said, meeting Izunavi’s gaze with a calm but determined look. “We have until September 1st. I won’t let him fall.”
You followed Kurapika as the sun began its slow descent, painting the sky with hues of orange and pink. Shadows lengthened, and the woods grew quieter, the sounds of the day's creatures giving way to the night’s. You had given him time—enough time, you hoped—for his anger to cool and for his heart to steady. But you knew that the embers of rage didn’t die so easily; they could smolder for a long, long time.
You found him near the lake, sitting against a tree with his knees pulled up, his blonde hair catching the last rays of sunlight like threads of gold. He stared blankly ahead, lost in thought, his face a mask of quiet resolve. You watched him for a moment from a distance, letting your presence be felt without imposing yourself. You knew words wouldn’t be enough—not yet, not for a boy with a fresh wound.
Slowly, you made your way toward him, moving carefully and deliberately, leaving space for him to turn you away if he chose. He didn’t look at you, but he didn’t push you away either. That, in itself, was something. You took a seat beside him, leaving enough distance between the two of you to let him feel unpressured but close enough that your presence was felt. You let the silence stretch, understanding that sometimes it was the only thing that could truly speak.
After a while, you finally broke the silence, your voice soft, almost tentative. "You want to hunt the Troupe, right?"
Kurapika didn’t move at first, his eyes still fixed on the water. When he finally spoke, his voice was quiet but resolved. “I don’t have a choice.”
The words hung between you, heavy with finality. You have heard that before, spoken in different ways by different people. It was always the same. A choice made in desperation, when the soul felt trapped by the past, by the need to correct something that could never truly be fixed.
“You always have a choice,” you replied softly, your tone neither reprimanding nor coddling. It was simply a statement of fact.
Kurapika shifted, his hands tightening around his knees. “Not when it comes to this. Not when it comes to them.”
You glanced at him out of the corner of your eye, studying the lines of tension etched across his young face. He was still so young—too young for this kind of rage to live so deeply inside him. But rage wasn’t something that cared for age, wisdom, or even reason. You knew that better than anyone.
“They took everything from me,” he continued, his voice harder now, laced with bitterness. “Everything. My family, my home, my future. I can’t just let that go!”
You exhaled slowly, a quiet sigh that was lost in the soft rustle of the wind through the trees. “Letting go doesn’t mean forgetting,” you said gently. “It doesn’t mean forgiving either. But this path you’re walking... It’s not just about revenge anymore. It’s about who you become at the end of it.”
Kurapika’s eyes flicked toward you then, sharp and wary like he was expecting a lecture he’d heard a thousand times before. But you weren’t here to preach.
“I’m not asking you to stop,” you clarified, your gaze still on the water, the gentle waves reflecting the dying light. “I know that’s not an option for you. But you need to be careful, Kurapika. Rage has a way of consuming everything in its path. It’ll burn through you if you’re not careful. Until there’s nothing left of the person you used to be.”
He was silent for a moment, absorbing your words. The tension in his body hadn’t lessened, but there was a flicker of something in his eyes—uncertainty, perhaps. Or maybe it was understanding.
“I can control it,” he said, his voice quieter now, but the determination in it was unmistakable. “I have to.”
You nodded slightly, acknowledging his resolve. “Control is important. But you also need balance. Power without purpose is dangerous, even to yourself.”
Kurapika frowned, his lips pressed into a thin line. “Purpose? My purpose is to kill them.”
You turned to face him fully then, your eyes locking onto his. “And after that? What happens when they’re gone? What’s left for you?”
The question caught him off guard. He opened his mouth, but no words came out. For a moment, the hard façade he had built around himself seemed to crack, and you saw the lost boy beneath. A boy who had lost everything and didn’t know how to live without his hatred to guide him.
“That’s why I’m here,” you continued, your voice softening. “I’ve walked this path before. I know where it leads. If you’re not careful, you’ll reach the end of it and find that nothing is waiting for you on the other side. Nothing but emptiness.”
Kurapika’s hands slowly unclenched, his fingers tracing the edge of his sleeves as if grounding himself in the present moment. He didn’t say anything, but you could see the conflict in his eyes.
You reached out then, gently placing your hand on his shoulder, a rare gesture of comfort. “I’m not saying this to stop you,” you said, your voice low, almost a whisper. “But I am saying you need to think about what comes next. After the bloodshed. After the vengeance. What will you be left with?”
Kurapika lowered his head, the weight of your words sinking in. The silence stretched between you again, but this time it wasn’t filled with tension. It was a moment of quiet reflection.
“I don’t know,” he finally admitted, his voice barely audible.
You gave a small nod, squeezing his shoulder lightly before pulling your hand back. “That’s okay. You don’t have to know yet. Just... don’t lose yourself in the process.”
For a long moment, Kurapika didn’t move, his gaze fixed on the ground, deep in thought. When he finally looked up, there was a new clarity in his eyes, though the fire still burned there, too. He wasn’t ready to let go of his vengeance, but at least now he was starting to see the danger in letting it consume him completely.
“I’ll keep that in mind,” he said, his voice steady but quieter than before.
You nodded again, satisfied for now. It was a start. He would need time to fully understand what you meant, but at least the seed had been planted. And as much as you wanted to protect him from the pain of the path he was walking, you knew he had to walk it for himself. All you could do was guide him along the way.
As the last traces of daylight disappeared from the sky, you stood up, brushing the dirt from your pants. “Come on,” you said, offering him a hand. “Let’s head back before it gets too dark.”
Kurapika hesitated for a moment before accepting your hand, pulling himself up to his feet. He stood beside you, his gaze lingering on the horizon for just a moment longer before he nodded, turning to follow you back toward the camp.
As you walked side by side, the soft sounds of the night surrounding you, you couldn’t help but glance at him, the weight of the future heavy between you both.
The journey was far from over...
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ukrfeminism · 10 months ago
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We’ve been chatting for about half an hour when Eloise lowers her voice to a whisper. Until now she’s been confidently talking through the ups and downs of being a 19-year-old woman in a world she finds unsteady. 
She’s annoyed that, on TikTok, the advertisements she gets are keyrings with rape alarms and “stabby kitties” (a cat-shaped metal keychain with pointed ears sharp enough to cause damage), feels that modern feminism sometimes goes a bit too far, but having grown up in the age of nudes, she doesn’t really trust men. Which is unsurprising considering the story she tells me next.
“So a boy I know was asking a girl at his school for nudes,” she says, quietly. “And then when she refused, he threatened to rape her.” The boy was 14 and had recently posted an Andrew Tate video to his Instagram page, which was Eloise’s first encounter with the online influencer. 
“It said stuff like how women are your property and that it doesn’t matter if women say they’ve been sexually assaulted; if you’re with them that’s your right. I didn’t like it,” she adds.
Tate has made several appearances in the headlines this week. On Tuesday, a Romanian court rejected his appeal to ease the ban on him leaving the country as a legal case against him – in which he’s charged with human trafficking, rape and forming a criminal gang to sexually exploit women – continues. He denies all charges against him. The following day, Ipsos polling for King’s College London’s Policy Institute and the Global Institute for Women’s Leadership found that one in five men aged 16-29 who have heard of Andrew Tate have a positive view of him.
Separately – or, arguably, perhaps not – another survey published in the same week underpinned a renewed focus on the attitudes and beliefs of Generation Z, this time from the Crown Prosecution Service (CPS). The research asked just over 3,000 adults of varying ages – 50.6 per cent of whom were female – about their understanding of rape and serious sexual offences, and the law on consent, and drew troubling conclusions.
Overall, 74 per cent of people surveyed understood that it can still be rape if a victim doesn’t resist or fight back, but the number fell to just over half (53 per cent) of 18-24-year-olds who had the same understanding. Less than half of respondents from this age group recognised that victims might not report a sexual offence to police immediately, that being in a relationship or marriage doesn’t mean consent can be assumed, or that if a man has been drinking or taking drugs, he’s still responsible if he rapes someone. More than 70 per cent of over-65s recognised that even if no physical force is involved a person might not be free or able to consent to sex, compared to just 40 per cent of young people.
Previous generations have become used to hearing that rape myths and misconceptions continue to persist, but that’s precisely why this week’s grim trinity of headlines stings. “There tends to be a public assumption that things are generally always getting better,” says author and feminist campaigner Laura Bates. “Actually, views like these are incredibly widespread among young people.” 
Bates regularly works with schools, talking to pupils who often tell her that “rape is a compliment”, that “it’s not rape if she likes it” or, “it’s your boyfriend, you have to have sex with him”.
She adds: “Attitude surveys have to be taken seriously because they are a real red flag that we’re going backwards – we’re seeing much more extreme and concerning misogynistic attitudes among the youngest generations than we are among the oldest. We have to face up to that and ask, why is that happening?”
Gen Z has never been neatly contained. Growing up as the first digital natives in the chokehold of crisis – climate, Covid, cost of living – has seen them praised for their social awareness, but disenfranchised and forgotten by politics. Their extremely online nature has given them unprecedented access to the world and other people – but, of course, that’s a double-edged sword.
“The internet has made everyone’s voices louder, but that means the most misogynistic people in the world are heard more too,” says Niya Clement-Hickson, a 26-year-old marketing designer from London. He says his generation has been “kind of ruined” by social media.
“You’d be surprised at just how many people around my age will argue that Andrew Tate is not as bad as he seems.”
When I spend an hour talking to 16-year-old Tate fan Manus from Ohio on TikTok, he says exactly that. He’s relatively timid and seems unsure of what he thinks at times, but came across Tate aged 12, being drawn to his motivational speeches, humour, and attitude towards making money. “[Tate] kinda showed me how people really are in reality,” he says. On Tate’s assertions that women are the property of men, he says those beliefs are simply from the Bible (though Manus himself is Muslim).
He maintains he’s never seen Tate speak violently about women, and when I send him leaked voicenote recordings of Tate saying that he enjoyed raping a woman, Manus is certain it’s fake “probably to make him look bad”. I ask for his views on feminism and he responds that feminists now want “superiority” and “more rights”. What rights exactly? “More rights in general,” he says, vaguely.
This opinion is not a rarity – there’s a pervasive idea circling comments sections and pub corners that the pendulum has “swung too far”. “Some of us warned that when you continue to suppress their identity by telling young boys that they are inherently toxic, they’ll start acting irrational,” one comment under an Andrew Tate post this week read. But it’s not just boys who hold this idea. Early last year, a survey from Ipsos UK and the Global Institute for Women’s Leadership at King’s College London echoed this and some of Eloise’s views that feminism has gone too far. They found that 52 per cent of Gen Z and 53 per cent of millennials believe that we’re now discriminating against men. Less than half of Gen Z respondents said they defined themselves as a feminist.
Was it coincidence then, to see that shortly after the research was published in March 2023, the year of the girl was in full swing? A persistently pink summer was punctuated with girl dinners, #tradwives – modern women who believe in traditional gender roles – and stay-at-home girlfriends sharing their daily rituals on news feeds. New York magazine’s The Cut declared it “Woman in Retrograde” as the year came to a close; a cluster of reactionary elements to a significant demise of mainstream feminism.
This shift back to traditional behaviours is also present in younger men, says Niya. “A lot of guys feel that their role is all about providing money, being a protector. But they feel they deserve to get something out of the interaction. They just can’t deal with being told no.”
In terms of consent, does he hear attitudes that put women in danger? “Absolutely,” he replies. Niya didn’t learn about consent in school – “I don’t think it was ever talked about beyond ‘don’t have sex until you’re old enough’” – and thinks this is quite common for men of his age. For Maya, who’s 24 and neurodivergent, the line of consent is difficult to pinpoint and somewhat shaped by social media. There’s a “disconnect” from what she really wants – and is able to articulate – in the moment.
“I think that we do have less and less sex and more and more porn,” Niya adds. “And I think that once porn is your main and in some cases, only engagement with sex and women, then that is going to completely screw up how you see sex.”
Do all roads lead to porn? Probably. Clare McGlynn, who is a professor of law with particular expertise in sexual violence and online abuse, says: “We know that algorithms promote more extreme content, more hate – and many, many younger people, men and women, are getting this. Millions of people, as we speak, are watching mainstream online pornography that is racist, sexist, misogynist and violent in its content. Of course, it’s shaping attitudes and lives.”
“There’s certainly a pressure on young boys and men, for example, to be taking and sharing nudes – they’re part of a culture that is encouraging them to,” McGlynn explains. During a study, she looked at what material was presented on the homepage of popular sites – she found landing pages which were filled with sexually violent material. “So it’s also not them even actively choosing that material; we’re part of a culture that is grooming young men, teaching them expectations around sex – and asking them to accept and normalise it.”
What appears clear from the survey conducted by the CPS is a dangerous lack of understanding of what constitutes a crime. “I do lectures on criminal law and I’ve had students come up to me afterwards and say that they didn’t know they had been sexually assaulted or raped,” McGlynn adds.
Laura Bates says that we’re in the midst of a “crisis of sexual violence among young people”. 
“Deeply misogynistic misinformation is being spread to young people online at a rate that most people just have absolutely no idea about,” she says. “And there is a massive knock-on effect.
“Some will look at these surveys and go, well, what does attitude matter? But you have to draw a connection between these really worrying attitudes about rape and the fact that nearly 80 per cent of young people told Ofsted inspectors recently that sexual assault is normal and common in their friendship groups.”
So what can be done? More responsibility and accountability from social media companies, says Bates. Tate’s content – some of which reportedly shows him attempting to beat a woman with a belt; she later hides behind a locked door – has been viewed more than 11 billion times on TikTok, she says, adding: “That’s more than the population of the planet.” Last year, advocacy group HOPE found that more 16-17-year-old boys had watched Tate’s content than had heard of Rishi Sunak. “I think it’s really important that the government supports high quality, age-appropriate sex and relationships education,” she adds. 
Actively listening to and engaging with boys – as seen in initiatives like the state of New York’s Starting the Conversation campaign – is also important. Boys must have a safe and judgement-free environment to express themselves: the more their experiences of rape culture are internalised, the more difficult they are to see.
The Online Safety Bill, which was enacted in October last year, she says, was a missed opportunity for change. While it asks for more transparency on social media platforms and imposes sanctions for those not following the act, along with criminalising cyberflashing and sending unsolicited nude images, “it went 250 pages without mentioning women and girls once, until campaigners changed that”, Bates says.
“It’s so much more effective to focus on prevention of radicalisation than trying to unpick it once it’s happened,” she says. “Young people really are prepared to listen and prepared to change their minds, it’s just a shame this isn’t happening in every school.”
“It does make me worried about how safe the world is going to be,” says Eloise, who will begin her twenties in the summer. “What if people really start thinking that women are property again?” Then, she’s quiet again. “I really hope it can change.”
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juneyjubilation · 4 months ago
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Childhood Friends to Lovers - Dick Grayson x Reader
Dick Grayson and you, childhood friends who grew up together as circus performers, finding yourselves in a secret relationship. The road to love was not an easy one, but the two of you finally took the leap and admitted your feelings for each other. Now, you both have to navigate the challenges of keeping your relationship a secret, all while trying to protect each other from the dangers that come with being a part of the superhero world.
Oh boy this one got long. I hope you all enjoy :) 
. . .
You were a child when you first met Dick Grayson, the only son of John and Mary Grayson, the Flying Graysons, a family of trapeze artists who performed in a traveling circus. You were a member of the Aerial Silks act, and it was there that you first laid eyes on the young Dick, swinging through the air with a grace and skill that left you in awe.
Dick was a few years older than you, but as the years went by, you found yourself spending more and more time with him. The two of you would often sneak off during performances to explore the circus grounds, and you both shared a love for the thrill of the spotlight.
As you grew older, your relationship blossomed into something more, and you both found yourselves falling in love. You were the aerial silks performer, and he was the trapeze artist, and together, you were unstoppable. You were the perfect couple, the childhood sweethearts who had grown up together and found love in the most unexpected of places.
The day Dick Grayson was supposed to debut for the crowd was one that would forever be etched in your memory. It was a day of excitement and anticipation, as the circus crew of Haly's Circus prepared for the night's performance. You could feel the energy in the air, everyone buzzing with excitement for Dick's big moment.
You watched from the side of the stage as the Flying Graysons took their positions. Dick's parents, John and Mary, were in their element, the trapeze swinging gently between them. The crowd roared with approval as the music started and the act began, the Graysons' movements fluid and precise.
But then, in a heartbeat, everything changed. A sickening snap echoed through the tent, and the trapeze jerked violently, sending John and Mary plummeting towards the ground. You couldn't move, frozen in horror as you watched Dick's parents fall, their hands desperately reaching for anything to save them.
The silence that followed was deafening, and in the chaos that ensued, you frantically searched for Dick. You found him sitting on the ground, his face buried in his hands, sobs wracking his small body. Cops and CPS workers swarmed around him, their voices a blur as they tried to make sense of the tragedy.
In the midst of the chaos, you saw Bruce Wayne, the billionaire owner of the circus, standing off to the side. He looked devastated, his eyes fixed on Dick as he approached the boy. You watched, your heart breaking, as Bruce took Dick into his care, promising to look after him, to give him a home and a family.
You didn't know what the future held for Dick that night, but you knew that your lives had been forever altered by the cruel hand of fate. All you could do was hope that Bruce Wayne would take care of the boy you held so close to your heart.
. . .
And the world spun on, despite the loss of Mary and John Grayson. The days kept going, even without the sunshine that Dick Grayson had become for you. For a long time after that night, the world seemed bleak and colorless.
That was until you began to paint, desperate to try and mimic the vibrancy of the circus you once knew.
It was a surreal moment, and you couldn't help but feel a sense of pride as you looked at your creations. They were a far cry from the aerial silks you used to perform with, but they were just as beautiful in their own way.
The art gallery was abuzz with activity, the chatter of people mingling with the soft strains of classical music. The room was filled with an eclectic mix of people, dressed in their finest, all gathered to witness the unveiling of your art.
Your paintings were the centerpiece of the event, displayed on the walls in a tasteful arrangement. The room was dimly lit, spotlights highlighting each piece, allowing the vibrant colors to pop and draw the eye. A mix of abstract and realistic, your art told stories of love, loss, and the beauty of the world.
You stood by the entrance, greeting guests as they arrived, your smile warm and inviting. Your hair was styled in loose curls, framing your face, and you wore a dress that matched the vibrancy of your art.
Servers moved through the crowd, offering glasses of champagne and hors d'oeuvres, while in the corner, a jazz quartet played softly, the music adding to the festive atmosphere.
The buzz of conversation grew louder as the night wore on, the room filled with the sounds of people enjoying themselves, appreciating the art that you had poured your heart and soul into. It was a night of pride and accomplishment, a testament to the journey you had taken from a child performing in a circus to a renowned artist.
Amidst the sea of people, a familiar person stood out, his tall frame and sharp features making it easy to pick him out from the crowd. You froze, your heart pounding in your chest as you realized who he was. Dick Grayson, your Flying Grayson, the boy who had once been your everything - now grown. His dark hair was neatly styled, and he wore a well-tailored suit that hugged his lean, muscular frame.
He looked different now, older and more worn, but there was still that spark in his eyes that you remembered so well.
As you watched him, you were struck by the familiarity of his movements, the way he carried himself with an air of confidence and purpose. Even after all these years, there was something about him that drew your gaze, a spark that still lingered in your heart.
Dick's expression was serious as he moved through the crowd, talking to people with the ease of someone who was comfortable in any situation. A part of you ached, knowing that this was the man you once shared your dreams with, the boy who had lost so much, yet still managed to stand tall.
In that moment, as your eyes met from across the room, a jolt of recognition coursed through you, a reminder of the connection that still lingered between the two of you. Dick's eyes widened slightly, as if he recognized you too, and then he smiled, a genuine and warm expression that sent a shiver down your spine.
You found yourself drawn to him, making your way through the crowd, your heart pounding with a mix of excitement and nerves. As you approached, you could see the relief and happiness in Dick's eyes, and for a moment, it was as if no time had passed between the two of you.
As you approached Dick, you couldn't help but smile, your nerves settling as he greeted you with a warm hug. "It's been too long," he murmured, his voice a familiar comfort.
You laughed, your eyes meeting his as you pulled back, taking in the sight of him. "It has been," you agreed, your heart fluttering at the closeness. "But it's good to see you."
Dick nodded, his expression turning serious for a moment. "I've missed you," he admitted, his voice low. "I never got to say goodbye, after... everything."
Your heart clenched, the memories of that fateful night coming back to haunt you. "I missed you too," you whispered, your hand reaching out to touch his. "I never stopped thinking of you, wondering if you were okay."
Dick's eyes softened, and he squeezed your hand gently. "I'm okay," he reassured you. "I've had a lot to deal with, but I'm okay."
You nodded, understanding the weight of the words. "I'm glad," you said, your voice sincere. "I'm glad you're okay."
Dick's smile grew, and he released your hand, gesturing to the art around you. "This is amazing. I'm not surprised, though, you've always had a talent for bringing stories to life."
You beamed, proud of your work and grateful for the compliment. "Thank you, Dick. It's something I've always loved, and now, I get to share it with the world."
He nodded, his gaze taking in the art around you. "You're making your mark, just like you always said you would."
"And you've done the same," you pointed out, nodding to his suit. "You're a successful businessman, and I've heard whispers of an up-and-coming philanthropist in Blüdhaven?"
Dick's smile turned wry, and he looked away for a moment before meeting your eyes again. 
"Yeah, well, some things change, and some things stay the same, I guess." Dick replied, his voice holding a hint of nostalgia. "And now, here you are, the rising star of the art world."
You laughed, shaking your head. "I never thought I'd be standing here, in a fancy gallery, with my paintings on the walls," you admitted, gesturing around the room.
Dick's eyes sparkled with admiration. "You've come a long way. I'm not surprised, though. You always had the drive, the passion."
You smiled, feeling a warmth spread through your chest. "Thanks, Dick. It's good to see you again, to know that you're still out there, doing your own thing."
He nodded, leaning in closer. "I've missed you," he whispered, his voice soft and sincere. "And I'm glad I ran into you tonight."
You felt your heart skip a beat, the intensity of those words making your breath catch in your throat. "I'm glad too," you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.
The two of you stood there for a moment, lost in each other's gaze, the years that had passed seemingly melting away.
Dick's hand reached out, his thumb brushing gently against your cheek. "Let's catch up," he suggested, his smile drawing you in. "There's a lot to talk about, a lot of time to make up for."
You nodded, your heart pounding as you took his hand. "Yes," you agreed, the promise of rekindling your friendship and exploring the newfound feelings between you both filling you with excitement and anticipation. "Let's catch up."
The two of you stood there for a moment, the connection between you palpable. Then, Dick glanced at his watch, his expression turning apologetic. "I should get going," he murmured. "I have somewhere I need to be."
Your heart sank at the thought of him leaving, but you nodded understandingly. "Oh…" you said, your voice soft, trying to not let on how tightly disappointment gripped your heart.
Dick's smile was apologetic as he turned to leave, his hand lingering on your arm before releasing it. "I'm sorry. I really wanted to stay and catch up, but duty calls," he said, his voice tinged with regret.
You nodded, understanding that he had responsibilities he couldn't ignore. "It's okay," you reassured him, your heart aching at the thought of him leaving. "I'm glad you were able to come, though."
Dick's eyes met yours, and for a moment, you saw a flicker of something there, something that made your breath catch in your throat. Then, he was gone, disappearing into the crowd without another word.
You had thought you’d gotten over your silly childhood crush on Dick Grayson, but you couldn't help but watch him go, your heart aching with a mix of love and longing.
As the night wore on, the crowd began to thin, leaving you to mingle with the remaining guests and art critics. The soft strains of jazz continued to play, the room bathed in the warm glow of the spotlights, highlighting your artwork.
Suddenly, the mood shifted, the atmosphere growing tense as a group of thugs, armed with guns, burst through the doors. The room erupted into chaos as people scrambled for safety. You found yourself pushed against a wall, your heart pounding in your chest as the thugs rounded up the remaining guests, including you and five others.
The leader of the group, a burly man with a scowl, approached you, his gun pressing against your temple. "Don't move, or your friends die," he growled, his voice laced with menace.
You didn’t know these people, but that didn’t matter. You weren’t going to condemn these people to death over your art.
The other thugs herded the rest of the hostages into the center of the room, their weapons trained on the group. The once-festive atmosphere had been replaced with the heavy scent of fear and adrenaline.
One of the thugs approached the art, his eyes gleaming as he studied the pieces. "Let's see what kind of loot we have here," he said, a cruel smile spreading across his face.
As the heist unfolded, you could do nothing but watch, your mind racing as you tried to think of a way to escape the dangerous situation. The once-celebratory event had turned into a nightmare, and all you could do was hope for a swift resolution.
Just as the thugs began to load your artwork onto a waiting truck, the sound of a zip line echoed through the gallery. A dark figure swooped down, landing gracefully in the middle of the chaos.
Nightwing.
The thugs' eyes widened in surprise as he disarmed one of them, sending him stumbling backward. The other thugs, realizing they were in over their heads, started to panic, their guns wavering.
Nightwing moved with preternatural speed, his batons flying through the air, striking his targets with precision. The hostages, including you, watched in awe as he took down the thugs one by one.
The leader, sensing defeat, made a desperate move towards you, his gun raised. Nightwing was quicker, his escrima stick connecting with the man's wrist, sending the gun skittering across the floor.
The thug was subdued, and Nightwing turned to the others, his eyes dark with determination. "Everyone, stay down," he ordered, his voice firm but calm.
As the thugs were rounded up, Nightwing made his way to the hostages, helping them up. His gaze met yours, and for a moment, you felt a spark of recognition.
"You okay?" he asked, his voice low and concerned.
You nodded, still shaken by the ordeal. "Yeah, thanks to you," you replied, your voice trembling slightly.
Nightwing offered you a reassuring smile, his eyes never leaving yours. "Glad to be of service," he said, his voice brimming with the same intensity you remembered from your childhood.
As Nightwing helped the other hostages, your thoughts raced, piecing together the evidence from the encounter. The smile, so familiar and warm, the way he moved, with the grace and agility you remembered, and the way he had flown in on a zip line - the very same way you'd seen him do tricks in the circus.
Your heart began to race, the realization dawning on you. It couldn't be. But as he turned back to you, his eyes meeting yours once more, there was no denying it.
Nightwing was Dick Grayson.
The boy you'd once shared your dreams with, the man you'd reconnected with earlier that evening, was now standing before you in his crime-fighting persona. The shock and delight mingled, leaving you reeling.
As the last of the thugs were subdued and the night grew quiet, Dick's gaze returned to you, his expression softening as he noticed your trembling form. He approached you, his hands gentle as he guided you away from the chaos.
"Hey, are you okay?" he asked, his voice low and soothing. "That was quite a scare."
You nodded, still trying to process the events that had just unfolded. As you looked into his eyes, you couldn't help but notice how familiar they seemed, how much they reminded you of the boy you once knew.
You glanced around, making sure no one else was within earshot. As you were sure the coast was clear, you leaned in closer to him, your voice dropping to a murmur.
"Dick," you said, your words barely audible. "That's you under that mask, right...?"
Dick's eyes widened slightly at your whispered question, a flicker of surprise and a brief flicker of panic crossing his features. He hesitated for a moment, before nodding begrudgingly, his voice dropping to match yours in volume. "Guilty as charged," he replied, his voice low and incredulous, "how’d you know?"
You smiled, your heart pounding with excitement. "Because I know you, Dick Grayson," you whispered, your voice filled with a mix of awe and amusement. "And I know that only you could pull off a stunt like that."
Dick's smile grew, his eyes softening as he looked at you, the tension he'd been holding on to dissipating. "I guess I can't keep everything a secret from you," he replied, his voice laced with a hint of nostalgia.
You nodded, your heart swelling with a sense of pride and affection. "No, I guess not," you agreed, your hand reaching out to touch his arm.
The two of you stood there, lost in each other's gaze, the chaos of the night fading away. The reunion of old friends, turned into something more, as you realized that the bond between you transcended time and circumstances.
Dick's hand reached out, his thumb brushing gently against your cheek, just like it had earlier that evening. "Let's catch up," he suggested, his smile drawing you in. "There's a lot to talk about, a lot of time to make up for."
. . .
Days after the heist, you found yourself sitting in a small, dimly-lit café, the warmth of a steaming cup of coffee enveloping your hands. The room was filled with the soothing sounds of a jazz quartet playing in the background.
You glanced up as Dick entered, his dark eyes meeting yours across the room. He approached your table, his smile brightening the space around him.
"Hey," he said, taking a seat opposite you. "I've been meaning to talk to you."
"About last week?" you asked, a playful smile tugging at the corners of your lips.
Dick chuckled, his eyes never leaving yours. "Well, that too. But there's something else I need to discuss with you."
You nodded, your curiosity piqued.
"Look," Dick began, his voice low and serious, "this life, it's dangerous. I can't have anyone I care about getting hurt because of me."
Your heart clenched at his words, understanding the weight of his responsibility. "I understand," you replied, your voice soft. "But what about us?"
“We need to keep… this a secret, at least for now. It's for your safety," Dick hesitated, his expression pained. "I know. It's a lot to process."
You took a deep breath, trying to gather your thoughts. "I'm scared," you admitted. "Scared of what this means, of what it could put you through."
Dick's expression softened, his hand reaching out to brush against your cheek once more. "I know," he said. "And I'm scared too. But I don't regret a moment of that night. I don't regret being here with you."
"The connection we share means too much to me, you mean too much to me," Dick continued, his voice filled with conviction. "And I promise you, I'll do everything in my power to keep you safe. But for now, we need to keep this between us."
You looked into his eyes, seeing the sincerity and love reflected there. A lump formed in your throat as you nodded, accepting the reality of the situation.
"Okay," you whispered, your voice wavering. "Let's do this."
Dick's smile was tender, his thumb brushing against your cheek once more. "Thank you," he said, his voice low and filled with gratitude. 
The two of you sat in a comfortable silence, your hands brushing against each other, a silent promise of the love and commitment you shared, despite the secrets that bound you. Together, you'd face the challenges that lay ahead, trusting in the bond that had brought you back together, stronger than ever.
. . .
You sat in a bustling café, your eyes scanning the room as you sipped your coffee. Your heart raced with anticipation, knowing that Dick would be joining you soon. The coded message had been clear: "Meet me at the park with the red bench, our table will be the one with the most books."
A few minutes later, you spotted Dick entering the park, his eyes scanning the area as he approached. He took a seat at the designated table, his eyes meeting yours for a brief moment before he pretended to leaf through one of the books.
You made your way over, your heart pounding in your chest. "Mind if I join you?" you asked, feigning innocence.
Dick looked up, his eyes brightening. "Not at all," he replied, his voice low and filled with mirth. "Unless you're here for one of these literary masterpieces."
You laughed, taking a seat opposite him. "No, I'm afraid not," you said, your voice just as low. "I was just looking for a nice, quiet place to read."
You both settled into your roles, chatting casually about books while your hands brushed against each other under the table. The world around you faded, leaving only the two of you, wrapped in the sweet thrill of secrecy.
As the afternoon turned into evening, you and Dick continued to share stolen moments, laughing and reminiscing about old times. The park's red bench was now a symbol of your forbidden love, a beacon of warmth amidst the chaos of your lives.
In this public, yet private, space, the two of you could be free, if only for a little while. The coded messages and secret rendezvous were a testament to the depth of your feelings, a shared secret that only you and Dick knew.
. . .
You stood in the kitchen of your modest apartment, the scent of garlic and rosemary wafting through the air. The meal you were preparing was simple, yet hearty, perfect for a quiet evening at home.
The doorbell rang, and you quickly made your way to answer it. Dick stood on the other side, his smile warm as he stepped in. "You didn't have to go through all this trouble," he said, his voice low and filled with gratitude.
"Oh, come on," you replied, playfully swatting his arm. "I enjoy cooking. Plus, it's not every day I get to have a superhero over for dinner."
Dick chuckled, his eyes dancing with mischief. "I'll try not to disappoint," he said, helping you carry the dishes to the table.
The two of you settled in, the silence in the room punctuated by the sounds of cutlery clinking against plates and the occasional sip of wine. As you ate, you found yourselves slipping back into easy conversation, the familiarity between you like a comforting blanket.
After dinner, you moved to the living room, curling up on the couch together. You watched a movie, your legs intertwined and your heads resting against each other, the world outside fading away.
Later, as you lay in your bed, your arms wrapped around each other, you felt safe and content. The intimacy of the evening provided a stark contrast to the danger and excitement that defined Dick's life as Nightwing.
In these moments, the two of you could simply be, enjoying the simple pleasures of being together. The quiet moments, the stolen kisses, the whispers of love and affection that passed between you.
The private dinners, the intimate nights shared in each other's homes, were a balm for your souls, a sanctuary from the chaos that surrounded you.
. . .
You sat in front of your laptop, the screen glowing as you opened up the encrypted messaging app. You had to be careful, you couldn't let anyone see your communication with Dick. It was a risk, but one you had to take if you wanted to keep your relationship safe.
You typed out a message, your fingers flying across the keys. "Hey, I miss you. When can we meet up next?" you asked, your heart pounding with anticipation.
A few minutes later, a response popped up on your screen. "I miss you too. I can make it tonight at 7 pm. Meet me at the usual spot," Dick wrote, his words a promise of the love and passion that you both shared.
You smiled, your heart swelling with happiness. You couldn't wait to see him, to be in his arms again. You quickly typed out a response, your words filled with longing. "I'll be there. Can't wait to see you."
The two of you continued to communicate, your words flowing back and forth between you. You talked about everything and nothing, just enjoying each other's company. The encrypted messaging app provided a safe space for you to express your love and affection for each other, without fear of unwanted surveillance.
As the night wore on, you found yourself getting ready for your meeting with Dick. You put on your best outfit, your heart fluttering with excitement. You knew that you had to be careful, that the world around you was dangerous and unpredictable.
But in this moment, you didn't care. You just wanted to be with Dick, to enjoy each other's company. The world could wait, but your love for each other couldn't. You knew that you would do anything to keep your relationship safe, to protect it from those who would try to tear you apart.
. . .
You and Dick sat in a dimly lit corner of a crowded restaurant, your eyes locked on each other as you whispered. "So, what do you think?" Dick asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
"I think it's perfect," you replied, your smile brightening the space between you. "We'll say we met through work, that I'm a consultant for Wayne Enterprises."
Dick's eyes widened, and you could see the gears turning in his head. "And I'm pretty high up in the ranks," he added, his voice filled with mirth. "Everyone knows how I'm always looking for new talent."
You chuckled, nodding in agreement. "Exactly. It'll be believable, and it'll explain our frequent meetings."
A waiter approached, and you both ordered your meals, your hands brushing against each other for a brief moment. The world around you blurred, leaving only the two of you, wrapped in the warmth of your secret.
After the waiter left, you continued to discuss the finer details of your cover story. You decided that you would occasionally be seen working late hours at Wayne Enterprises, giving the appearance that your professional relationship was genuine.
Dick, always the strategic planner, suggested that you could be seen at charity events and fundraisers, further solidifying the façade. You agreed, your heart swelling with gratitude for his thoughtfulness.
As the night wore on, the two of you continued to enjoy each other's company, always mindful of the world around you. You knew that you had to be cautious, that the truth of your relationship couldn't be revealed.
. . .
The opulent ballroom was filled with the sounds of laughter, clinking glasses, and the soft strains of a string quartet. You and Dick stood together, your eyes locked on each other as you navigated the sea of people.
Dick's arm rested lightly on your waist, a gesture that was both protective and casual. It was a perfect display of your professional relationship, one that you had worked diligently to craft.
As you chatted with a group of people, you noticed a man eyeing you with interest. He approached, his smile charming and disarming. "Excuse me, miss, but I couldn't help but notice you from across the room. You're simply stunning," he said, his voice smooth and seductive.
Your gaze flicked to Dick, and you could see the trust and understanding in his eyes. You knew that you had to handle this situation with discretion, without revealing anything about your true relationship.
"Thank you," you replied, your smile warm but distant. "Unfortunately, I'm with someone tonight. But perhaps another time?"
The man's smile faltered for a moment before he recovered. "Of course, another time. It was a pleasure to meet you," he said, bowing slightly before moving on.
You turned back to the group, your heart beating with gratitude for Dick's unspoken support. The trust and discretion that you both shared were the backbone of your relationship, allowing you to navigate the complex world around you.
Throughout the evening, you and Dick continued to mingle, always mindful of each other's whereabouts. You exchanged subtle glances, your eyes filled with love and understanding.
You and Dick stood side by side, watching the crowd as you sipped your champagne. "I thought for sure he was going to try to hit on you," you said, your voice low and filled with amusement.
Dick's eyebrows shot up, and he let out a deep laugh. "Really? Why would you think that?" he asked, his voice equally as low.
You shrugged, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "Well, you're the one who's usually surrounded by women," you said, your voice light and teasing. "I thought you were just taking a break from all the attention tonight."
Dick's laughter filled the air, his eyes sparkling with humor. "Oh, I'm always getting attention," he said, his voice filled with amusement. "But I guess I'm just too used to it to notice."
You laughed, the sound light and carefree. "Well, it's a good thing I'm here to help you fend them off," you said, your eyes sparkling with mischief.
Dick chuckled, his eyes dancing with amusement. "I'll definitely take all the help I can get," he replied, his voice filled with mock seriousness.
You smiled, your heart swelling with love for the man who stood before you. "Well, you'll always have my attention," you said, your voice soft and filled with emotion.
Dick's expression softened, and he lowered his champagne glass. "I know," he whispered, his eyes filled with love and adoration. "And you'll always have mine."
The two of you continued to talk, your conversation peppered with quiet humor and playful jabs. You reveled in the simple pleasure of being together, the world around you fading away as you basked in each other's company.
. . .
Outside of Dick's inner circle and your closest friends, very few people would know about your relationship. You both took great care to maintain your cover story, ensuring that your interactions appeared professional and casual.
Dick's staff at Wayne Enterprises would know you as a consultant, a frequent visitor to the offices, and an occasional guest at charity events. They'd see you working late hours or having meetings in Dick's office but would assume it was all part of your professional relationship.
Similarly, your friends might notice that you often hang out with Dick but would be told about your professional connection.
Both Dick and you were careful to avoid any actions that could be misconstrued as intimate or compromising. You would always have a plausible explanation for your whereabouts and interactions.
The only people aware of your true relationship would be those you trust explicitly, such as Dick's closest confidants or your dearest friends. They would understand the importance of keeping your relationship a secret and would respect your desire for privacy.
In essence, you had created a web of intricate lies and half-truths to protect your love. It was a delicate dance, but one that the two of you had mastered, ensuring that your relationship remained a secret, shielded from prying eyes.
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sillylandmagic · 2 months ago
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Happy World Cerebral Palsy Day!! Made a drawing of me through the years as someone with this disability.
Hope all you folks with CP get a billion dollars!!/half joke
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green, from lightest, to darkest. on the left side, a drawing of a baby is drawn. She has light hair, eyes looking up, and wearing a nasal canulla for oxygen. She wears a pink onesie with a light pink collar, and dark pink buttons. In the middle, a drawing of a 3 year old me, is standing on her own. There are squiggly lines next to my legs as I stand in a wide stance, showing the hard time with balance. The girl wears a light yellow shirt, with a green dinosaur on it. Her collar, and ends of sleeves are also green. she wears grey pants, and periwinkle socks. The little girl has blonde short-mid length hair. Her eyes are pointed down to look at her surroundings so she can keep balanced. a bit of drool comes from her mouth. On the right, a teenage me sits down criss-cross-applesauce with green pants. an orange, dark orange, and pink striped shirt is on them. Their left arm has increased muscle tone, and is positioned in a flexor position at my waist. There is a heart between the toddler drawing and the teen drawing. I have brown hair with blonde highlights. my roots and back of hair showing. I wear glasses and am talking. A message wrote says "Happy Cerebral Palsy Day" END ID:
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