#While Anakin gave Ahsoka all the love

[marvelstars]

Agreed this is a big part of why their relationship was always different and while Obi-Wan sometimes was nice but most times he was sarcastic, this is why Anakin told Ahsoka she may not have made it as Obi-Wan´s apprentice but she may do it with him, he didn´t learn this approach with Ahsoka from him, this is Shmi all the way.

[gffa]

EVERY SINGLE MOMENT OF THIS WAS SUCH A FUCKING BANGER. Baylan Skoll is reading exactly what Ahsoka fears and sets up this vision for her, that he says her legacy is one of death and destruction--which hurls her into a vision-slash-flashback of the clone wars, where she felt like this is all she learned as a Jedi, because this is what the galaxy was when she was growing up in it. That this is Anakin--or Ahsoka's own mind using Anakin as a proxy, because she STILL emotionally and mentally sees him as the one who teaches her, even if it's not really him, she imagines it to be him, because he's her Master, the one who taught her what she needs to know--but also this is the center of everything she can't let go of, all the hurt and fear and loss, it's all tangled up in Anakin and what he became. That she loves him and fears him in the same breath, that she remembers the good, the charming young man who was teaching her how to survive, who gave everything he had to her, while also remembering what he became, that he was so powerful that he became the worst nightmare the galaxy had ever seen, that neither of these is the whole of who he is, that he is all of this and more. He isn't just Anakin Skywalker, he's also Darth Vader. He isn't just Darth Vader, he's also Anakin Skywalker. He isn't just Anakin and Vader, he's also everything of Obi-Wan, of Qui-Gon, of Dooku, of Yoda--and she has to learn to accept that the same is true of her, too. The potential for tremendous darkness lurks in all their hearts, that's what the Jedi teach. No one is above the dark side. No one is above fear and clinging on and holding too tight. It's a lifelong journey not to give in to those things and you are so much more than just any one moment or even any one aspect. Yes, if she's everything he is, then she does have the potential to become the same kind of nightmare of death and destruction that he did, just as she fears. It's why she's held herself back from the galaxy, from the Ghost crew, from Sabine especially, because she's afraid, and only agreed to train Sabine in the first place because whatever abilities she has, they're so low Sabine can't become another Vader. Grogu does have the potential to become another Vader. Ahsoka does have the potential to become another Vader. She has killed many and destroyed so much. But that's not all she is. She's also saved so many lives. She also gently tucked Roo Roo Page back into her mother's arms. She also taught Petro and Katooni and Gungi and Zatt and Byph about how to get their crystals. She also saved Kaeden's life. She also protected Ezra from Vader. She's all those things, plus more, just as Anakin was all the things he was and more, too. Baylan was right that part of her legacy is death and destruction, but he's a dark sider, he lies and twists the truth, and the truth is--Ahsoka Tano, like every Jedi before her, is more than just one part of her legacy.

[fellthemarvelous]

Jedi and attachment

The Jedi Order was around 25,000 years old when it fell at the end of the Clone Wars.

And I've seen people say "the Jedi don't teach emotional regulation" I guess because there are some Jedi who fell, but like, the number of Jedi who didn't fall far outweighs the number of Jedi who did fall.

And that's not to say that Jedi never made mistakes, but none of them gave into their anger and fear and hatred. Mistakes are normal, even for Jedi. Failure is the greatest teacher. They were apparently able to regulate their emotions well enough to actually learn from their mistakes and grow.

I'm not sure which part of "the life of a Jedi is not easy" isn't exactly translating well for some people.

What do people think Qui-Gon meant when he told Anakin being a Jedi would be challenging?

As Yoda said, it is a lifelong struggle not to allow fear to bend into anger. Fear leads to anger leads to hate leads to suffering. The Jedi never stop learning.

The reason they avoid attachments is because attachments distract them from the bigger picture, from their purpose. They are protectors and defenders of life, and they cannot be picky about who they choose to help, regardless of personal feelings.

As Obi-Wan has said, Jedi do not hold grudges. They cannot. They can be upset, yes, but they are given the tools to handle their emotions and often utilize them.

Anakin damned an entire galaxy when he fell to the dark side. The Jedi are not to blame for Anakin's fall. Anakin made his choice, and while he spent thirteen years being groomed by Palpatine, he made the choice to follow Darth Sidious.

ANAKIN FELL BECAUSE OF THE CHOICES HE MADE.

He is the one who slaughtered Jedi younglings. He's the one who slaughtered the Separatist leaders, and even though they were the enemy, they were defenseless and trapped in a room with the most powerful being in the galaxy after being sent there by Sidious and Grievous.

The reason the Jedi were so hesitant to accept him into the Jedi Order was because of his age. He was attached to his mother and his anger over her death is what caused him to slaughter an entire colony of Tusken Raiders. He didn't do it out of love. He did it out of hatred, and revenge is not the Jedi way.

It is not the fault of the Jedi that Anakin could not properly regulate his own emotions. He lied to the Jedi for three years. He hid his relationship with Padme, so how was Yoda supposed to know how to help him properly when he didn't have the full context? Of course his advice seemed bad because Anakin was not being forthcoming about the nature of his relationship with Padme. Yoda did not have a complete picture of Anakin's anxieties at the time, and while you can teach someone how to do something, you cannot control how they put the teachings into practice. You can only hope and trust that they are doing the right thing.

And the thing is, the Jedi would have helped Anakin and Padme. Yoda and Obi-Wan loved Anakin. We saw several instances of just how much Yoda cared about Anakin, especially so at the end of season six of the Clone Wars.

Anakin betrayed the entire Jedi Order because he allowed his fears to consume him. He participated in the genocide of the order he had been part of for thirteen years just to save the life of ONE PERSON who ended up dying anyway BECAUSE of him.

No one has ever said the Jedi Order is perfect because there is no such thing as perfect, but they were not ever the villains. They were never the bad guys. They were pulled into a war orchestrated by Darth Sidious who weaponized the compassion of the Jedi as a way to destroy the order.

When you look at the handful of Jedi who fell and claim that the Jedi "don't teach emotional regulation" you're just erasing all personal accountability from the fallen Jedi WHO MADE THEIR CHOICES.

There is only ONE Jedi (that I am aware of) who fell to the dark side involuntarily, and that was Ahsoka Tano. She was corrupted against her will and then killed. Anakin was able to resurrect her, and while he did a good thing, it only made his fear of losing her again even worse.

Maul murdered Satine and forced Obi-Wan to watch, but Obi-Wan managed to control his emotions and not go on a killing spree. He actually held a dying Maul in his arms. Ahsoka was failed by the Jedi Order, but she didn't fall to the dark side. Yoda lived for 900 years and never once fell to the dark side.

There are a variety of factors that went into Anakin's fall, but he is the one who made the choice to do the monstrous things he did. He was not being mind controlled. He had Jedi training, but he threw all of that away for one person. He gambled the fate of the galaxy on the belief that Palpatine would help him save Padme from dying, knowing that Palpatine was a Sith Lord and knowing that he was the one who was actually responsible for the war. He made a selfish choice at the expense of everyone else in the galaxy and the only person who won in the end was Darth Sidious. It was the biggest lesson that Anakin ever learned.

This is not a failure of "teaching emotional regulation". This is the failure of someone who allowed his personal feelings to overshadow his Jedi training, and he is responsible for the consequences of his own actions.

End note: This is not an Anakin Skywalker bashing post. I love Anakin Skywalker, but he absolutely is to blame for his fall to the dark side. He's a fascinating character. I could write a whole ass separate post on why I love him so much. Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader is an icon.

[phoenixyfriend]

Something something Dooku survives the Clone Wars, the Imperial Era, and even a few years past the OT...

And Luke finds him while looking for More Jedi to help him teach.

Chewie recognizes the decrepit old bastard, and there is yelling, but being A Hundred And Nine has mellowed Dooku out in his own dusty hermit hut, on the other side of the galaxy from Ben and Yoda's hermit huts.

All the Jedi ghosts are unhappy with this but Dooku is… not REFORMED, technically, but he's old and tired, even if the Force keeps him a bit more healthy and energized than the average Old Guy, and humans routinely live to pretty unreal old ages in the gffa anyway so really 109 for them is probably like 85 for us.

But yeah. Old mountain hermit (to contrast the desert and the swamp) who's been in hiding from That Dick Sidious since he lost both hands to babyface Vader in 19BBY.

@jebiknights (Sammie) said:

Dooku finds out Luke was also trained by Yoda and is like "oh Yoda finally gave me a younger brother like I always wanted"

Alternately he could probably get Luke to call him Great-Great-Grandfather.

Sammie: Funniest option is he's both which makes Luke even more confused lmao Ghost Obi wan in the background like "stop fucking using non Jedi terms to describe Jedi relationships it doesn't fucking work"

Luke calls him, irreverently, Gramps, but also. Leia definitely recognizes him as a Recent Historic Political Figure, but not until AFTER Luke has already integrated Dooku into his new Jedi school.

"Why did Chewie let him do that?" He thought it was funny. (And/or if you like Chewku, you can make this some sordid exes thing.)

"Why did R2 let him do that?" Best keep evil man in electrical prodding range.

Sammie: Leia comes to the school for her biweekly Jedi lessons and sees the newest teacher was a traitor to the Republic 😭

Best if they can find Quin or Ventress out in the black. Partly because like. Does this make Ventress their step-grandma (Quinlan's on-off something) or their great-great-aunt (Dooku's 4th apprentice)?

Sammie: Both and also Luke's niece. Luke has a migraine by the end of it and Leia is ready to disown herself. Ventress: I didn't realize the Jedi were so incestuous Luke: war flashbacks to before he realized Leia was his sister

Ahsoka in the corner with Spacebucks, five years late "Y'all suck. Hey, Quin."

Sammie: I know you likely didn't bring up Quinlan thinking of QuinObi but now I'm imagining Quinlan declaring himself their grandpa when he meets the twins bc 1) he loves to cause chaos 2) he does/did consider Anakin his kid even if not in neat non Jedi terms and 3) Obi-Wan thought being considered Anakin's father made him sound old, and Quinlan needs to harass him beyond the grave

Dooku must have a cane that the ghosts heckle him about because He Clearly Wants To Be Just Like Yoda.

@lyntergalactic (Lyn) said:

I feel like evil gramps could really bring out Ahsoka's snark once she shows up and that would be highly entertaining Ahsoka is simultaneously his most and least favorite grandchild

She's the most experienced as a Jedi (Ventress went full Sith, not just leaving the Order but following the tenets like Ahsoka, and Quinlan isn't in the lineage), has never Fallen unless you count that thing on Mortis.

Also she WILL bitch Dooku out at this age, and honestly he kind of appreciates the brutal honesty.

Ahsoka: I'm not a Jedi. All the old people: Lies

She brings up the Hondo incident since nobody else is putting in the effort. Anakin and Obi-Wan COULD as ghosts but nooooooo she has to do everything around here.

Sammie: Oh but it sets them off so hard they can barely get the story off from laughing NGL I think the twins did not understand how truly annoying Obi-Wan and Anakin could be together until the Hondo story gets told.

They are The Worst.

[vadersassistant]

Hiiii

wo dering if you could do an enemies to lover anakin imagine. kind of like friends to enemies to lovers or something like that and it ends in them making out o whatever you are comfortable with.

Anyways thank youuu

Denial One Shot (Darth Vader x Reader)

Summary: After venturing into a Sith Temple to try and find an edge on the current war, (Y/N) meets her enemy, Lord Vader, the man who killed her best friend and secret lover. He has been hunting both her and her alias down for months, following her across the galaxy, but little does she know, he has no plans to kill her. Takes place in the temple seen in the Star Wars Rebels season two finale. Reader was previously a Jedi and is in hiding due to order 66.

Warnings: Make out session

A/N: (Y/N) does not know Vader is Anakin, and Vader does not know (Y/N) is the Fugitive he has been searching for. This is once again a mix of suited Vader and nightfall Vader. In which, Vader wears the suit and mask, but he can take it off and looks like the Anakin we know and love.

The temple was eerie, an odd feeling passing by with each step you took. It was the opposite of the one I grew up in, representing everything I was told to dislike, and yet I was here anyways. I had made up my mind to fight instead of continuing to run from the problem. I wasn’t a rebel, but I wasn’t an imperial either. I was the middle ground, a former Jedi with a new identity, a mask to shield my face so that I could live freely, but the saber still gave it away. I was good, too good to be a civilian having fun with an old relic, even though some still used them publicly. Some, as in him.

The Jedi fell and Lord Vader rose out of thin air. There was no preface, no foreshadowing, he just came, and everyone bowed their heads.

To outsiders he was a military leader trained in combat, who happened to use an imaginary power. To force users, like Obi-Wan, Ahsoka, and I, he was a Sith. We all knew it the second he began hunting us down. He wanted the Jedi dead and made it clear when he began searching for my alias as well. Everyone knew who she was, I was put on every single imperial security watch available, but I evaded it all I could. I forged a new saber, so that they couldn’t track me that way, and told people about how the female jedi on the Holonets from the clone wars died. The only people who truly knew were Obi-Wan and Ahsoka, since they too had done something similar. He was Ben, she was Ashla, and I gained the name Fugitive, a mask being the only way to keep track of my identity.

I couldn’t count how many storm-troopers I had killed by now, just that I did. I was forced to, to keep myself alive, because he wanted me turned in. I was always told to run, to flee from Vader because of what he’s done, but all I wanted was for the man to wind up dead. A lust for revenge had developed ever since I learned what he did to my best friend, Anakin Skywalker.

I don’t even know how he could have killed a warrior like him, but he did and now he’s gone. Slaughtered like any other while trying to save people in the temple, something someone with his character would have done naturally. The worst part is that everyone he was trying to save is dead too, and that he could have escaped with us, had he not done what he did. He had a wife, Senator Amidala, a good friend of mine, who also died that night, although I wasn’t sure if they ended on good terms.

The two had been arguing for a while, he believed she was cheating on him with Obi Wan, although she continued to deny it along with everyone else. I was the only one who he talked to about his problems willingly, even Kenobi would have to go through reading his mind to talk about personal issues. It was only when Anakin died that the truth came out, that being that Anakin was right, and she was seeing Kenobi.

I hadn’t recognized him after that point. I knew he was afraid he would be kicked out of the Jedi order if we found out he was dating another woman. Even further, the fact he knowingly was allowing the affair to happen, but it occurred anyways, and he lost everything with it. That was consequence enough, he didn’t need me to yell at him any further for going that far.

Still, I was angry, because I cared about Anakin.

And also loved him.

I denied it for years, the helpless prodding’s from Ahsoka when the two of us would spend hours upon hours with each other. We carried out the entire war effort, working extremely close together on missions. It was no surprise that I liked him, he had even mentioned subtly what things would be like if he hadn’t met her. It sounded like he regretted it, but I had no clue, due to us being force users.

I now stood in front of the man who took him away, the one that gutted him in the chest like a fish with no care whatsoever. The man that had been hunting me down under both my names since the night of the fall, the one that was known for murdering everyone in his path. I don’t know how he found me, I had a feeling we were being followed, but I didn’t care. We needed the Holocron inside of the temple, and Ahsoka now had it in hand. I could sense their distraught, both behind me looking at the Sith in front of us. They didn’t want to fight him; they were afraid to fight him. I felt differently, looking at his mask through the visors of my own.

“It was foretold that you would be here, our long-awaited meeting has come at last."

“This meeting is over,” Ahsoka said.

“Are you so sure?” the Sith questioned through the modulated voice his mask provided him, as I stepped forward.

“What are you doing?” Obi-Wan asked me, his breath becoming short.

“Leave."

“No," he shook his head. "Don’t do this."

“Leave. Now.”

I looked up at the temple’s ceiling as the walls started to drop down. It was collapsing on itself, since the Holocron had been taken from the Obelisk. There wasn’t much to do, but I knew I didn’t want to pull them into this. I turned around and outstretched a hand.  

Ahsoka screamed as I force pushed both her and Obi-Wan back while the temple’s walls crashed down. I saw her figure fly back just before the drop and felt her gently land. There was a ship, they could leave, I would worry about myself after I killed him.

“We’re finishing this here,” I said. "I know you've been hunting me for the past months."

“You are courageous, unlike your friends,” the Sith mused. “Hateful.”

“You killed my best friend," I pointed out. "I want you to experience that same pain."

“Revenge is not the Jedi way,” he reminded. "Your confidence dilutes your ability to make rational decisions."

“I am no Jedi.”

“Then who are you? Your saber is unlike any I have ever seen, an identity successfully hidden behind a helm.”

“That’s none of your business, why have you been hunting me?” I asked. I felt the pressure of the Dark Side creeping against my mind's barriers, he was trying to invade.

“You would make a wonderful apprentice in the dark side,” Vader said. "You have already abandoned your training as a Jedi."

“I don’t side with murderers.”

“And yet you are one. I have seen your way of fighting Fugitive; you have killed countless of our troops and inquisitors.”

“Your Inquisitorious is an embarrassment, and I will never join you, not after what you did,” I called my saber to my hand, igniting it.

“Then you will die.”

There was this feeling of fear that attempted to wash over me, like he was attempting to throw me off, but I wasn't thinking about it anymore.

I ran full speed at him, force pushing myself up off the ground and into the air to try and put myself on the offensive. My blade met his right over his helmet, as he angled me back and I landed behind him. My automatic response was to try and swing for his legs, a move he evaded but had been surprised by. I knew I needed to be careful with how I played things. He would try and tire me out by just playing the defensive, but I also didn’t get that tired frow much stamina I built up during the war. Vader was also bigger, and stronger, meaning I’d need to use his weight to my advantage. I was quick, less stable, and grounded, and more agile in my movements.

We continued to take shots at each other, as he seemingly began to test me. It was a constant switch from the right to the left, bashing at each other from different angles and walking along with it. It was something Anakin and I always did, and it almost felt familiar. For whatever reason, I could feel myself getting into the rhythm Skywalker and I got into when we would train every day. After a certain point I would always switch my grip and force him to back off, and I did it purely out of muscle memory, shoving the Sith back.

“Your anger focuses you,” he commented. “Join me and I can enhance that power.”

“You killed him, the man I loved, do you truly believe I would ever consider that?”

“He is gone for a reason,” Vader said.

“He was the chosen one!” I shouted, interlocking lightsabers in a pursuit for power over the other. "You know why he lost his life?! Because he was trying to save everyone else, instead of actually caring for himself for once."

“(Y/N)."

I stumbled back immediately, hearing that name leave his mouth,

"What?"

My eyes widened beneath the visors, letting my guard down for just a moment.

It was all he needed.

I felt his immense force break through my walls and invade my mind, clawing through my memories and thoughts like a file. Not only that, but he immediately took me to the ground. It was quick, as he now straddled me, muscular thighs resting over my lower waist. Both my arms were pinned to either side with by the force, my saber in his hand.

I grunted, struggling under him and thrusting against his cod piece hoping it would make him budge but it barely made a difference. I couldn’t do a thing, as the Sith reached for my mask and pressed down on the sides. I felt it depressurize, as his gloved digits lifted it off my head, and I looked into his mask with my own eyes.

"How do you know my name?" I asked angrily as I fought underneath him to free myself.

There was no way of telling what he truly felt in that moment, holding the helm silently, breathing being the only indication he was still alive. I continued to try and do everything to get out of his grasp, but the Sith only sat there and took me in, his body heat lingering over my own. I felt like a mess, wondering where Ahsoka and Obi-Wan might be right now, realizing why Anakin lost his life to this man. I didn’t know how he knew my name, my real name, the one that no one had called me in months. I was fully pinned down, not giving up until I saw him reach for his own helmet.

"What are you do—"

My throat ran dry, amber eyes piercing through my body like a blade.

"Anakin."

It was him, with brown hair that held golden streaks just above his armor.

"(Y/N)."

Hearing his voice sent a shiver down my entire back, as I shuddered underneath him.

“I thought you died—they said Vader killed you—" there were tears welling up in my eyes, looking up at him.

“I am alive."

“Why did you turn?"

“The Jedi council was using us, Obi-Wan lied to me about Padme (Y/N), they were having an affair. But you know that already.”

“Obi Wan told us,” I trailed off.

“I know.”

“Do you plan to kill me?”

“No, that was never my intent," he emphasized lowly.

“So, what will you do?” I questioned.

“After separating myself from the order, I reflected much upon it,” Anakin started. "And came to terms with several of my mistakes."

“What mistakes?”

Still straddling me Anakin leaned down, placing his hands by either sides of my head and lowering himself to my ear.

“I was blindly dating filthy senator, when I had the love of my life right next to me the entire time."

"What do you mean?" I emphasized each word, my abdomen tensing as he got so close to me.

"There wasn't a day that went by that I didn't think of my future and imagine you by my side. I told myself it was our strong bond causing me to think of you constantly, due to the amount of time we spent together, but now, I feel completely different."

"Anakin," my heart was racing, as he continued to whisper into my ear.

"Maker, I missed you so much."

He was just trying to be friendly, that's all this was.

"Now, I know you are not that naive," he let out a deep chuckle, reading my mind.

"Is this your way of coercing me into joining the dark side?" I said softly, trying to play it off.

"There is no need to coerce you (Y/N), your heart is already doing all the work," Anakin told me. "All there is to do is to make up for lost time."

"No.."

"Continuing to deny it is only stalling the inevitable," he spoke in a playful way. "Your hatred towards the one you believed to be my killer only proves it more."

"I—" I cut myself off, as Anakin moved his head, now right over mine.

"What is it?" he asked me, his golden eyes flicking from my lips up to my eyes in quick fashion.

I gave in, nodding to his silent question and feeling the force lift off my hands.

Anakin pressed his lips to mine as I lifted my head up and met him midway. His robotic hand came down to my waist, the other combing through my hair as he helped hold my head steady. It was delicate and prepared, goosebumps crawling over my skin as his weight pressed me onto the cold temple floors. He was an expert in the way he worked around my mouth, the first time I had ever kissed anyone to begin with.

To think such a sacred place would be ruined due to our own shenanigans.

A Jedi and a Sith, making out in a temple with no care for sentiment.

His lips were chapped yet soft, and the more breaths we took between kissing the more swollen they became. Anakin didn’t seem to care though, continuing to go down on my neck allowing me to breath. He wasn’t going too far, but it was enough for the occasion, leaving marks I that wouldn’t leave for days.

It was madness.

Everything around us screamed in pleasure, the force happily chiming along with the two sides agreeing on something, even if it wasn’t an argument. Anakin had changed, and I couldn’t decide if it was for better or for worse.

If only those two could see me now, making love to the man that we had been running from for months. The copious amounts of rage had turned to attraction in a blink of an eye, rejoicing in his presence as my hand pressed against his tunic and I felt his abdomen underneath the fabric. He was such light and yet the darkness itself, drowning me in it as we sunk into a pool of ecstasy.

The cold stone floors were soon heated, as the temple grew humid and we both simultaneously agreed to take our tops off. It was the definition of multitasking, as I took off his armor and tunic, leaving behind a black pair of pants, and his boots. With the force he slipped my top off, gaining access to my collar bone and gracing it with his mouth. There was a possessive feeling in the air, as he took in my body for the first time with his own eyes as I did to him.

"You are so beautiful, it is intoxicating."

I felt myself smiling, sitting up and wrapping my arms around his neck, the both of us kissing deeply. This was it, holding our breath as we enjoyed one another, but the force was warning the both of us.

The temple shook, I almost forgot it was collapsing.

"We need to escape before we become trapped inside," Anakin said. "My ship is outside."

"And you assume I'm coming?"

"I know you are."

I laughed, acknowledging his foresight. We put on our clothes hurriedly yet thoroughly, as someone trained to handle life or death would. In truth, that was what we stood for, as Jedi and Sith both came together as one, in ways that would be frowned upon.

Except we didn't care.

We weren't denying it any longer.

Back in business since the recent Ahsoka episode. Hope you all enjoyed!

[darthgloris]

2AM THOUGHTS #5: Ahsoka snitching on Anakin to Y/N about his crush on her

Ahsoka looked over her shoulder and rolled her eyes with a small smile.

"What?" Y/N asked.

"My Master." She replied simply.

"What about him?" She wondered, looking back. She saw Anakin already staring at her with a charming smile. As soon as she met his eyes, she smiled back and offered him a small wave, which he returned gladly. She giggled at the thought of having his attention and turned around, returning to her conversation with the Padawan.

"That." Ahsoka deadpanned.

"Oh, come on, he's just being sweet." She dismissed with a wave.

"Is he?" She asked rhetorically. "You think he's sweet, you should hear the way he talks about you."

"What? What does he say?" Y/N wondered.

"Ugh, you have no idea! Do you know how many mornings I've spent listening to him whining over you and going 'she's such an angel, I don't know what we did to deserve her', 'I wish I could spoil her with everything she ever wanted', 'I'd leave the Jedi Order in a heartbeat if she asked', 'Maker, she's so intelligent, she makes everyone here look like a dog'-"

"Wait, wait, what?" She interrupted. "Anakin said he'd leave the Order for me?"

"He did. You turn him into mush just by existing," she confirmed. "He wants you so badly that if you complimented him, he'd die."

The realization of what she meant to him was a bit overwhelming, yes, but it made her happy. The happiest she had ever been. "That's... wow."

"What are you going to do about it?" Ahsoka asked.

"I... I don't know, I mean... he's amazing. He really, really is." She sighed, sitting on a rock.

"Do you like him?" The Padawan pushed, although she knew the answer as clearly as anyone with eyes.

"Of course I do, who wouldn't? I mean, he's sweet and kind and gentle, he's handsome, he's smart, he makes me laugh, and- oh."

Ahsoka raised an eyebrow, amused. "Gotcha."

"All right, then, I'm going to spend time with him more often." Y/N concluded.

"Starting now. Go." Ahsoka said and gave her a little push to where her Master was working.

Y/N walked closer to Anakin, who smiled brightly when he caught sight of her. "Hi."

"Hi," she replied, chuckling softly to herself. "What you doing?"

"Oh, just fixing this speeder. It got hit pretty bad during the battle." He sighed, hands on his hips as he examined his work from afar.

"How'd you fix it?" She asked, smiling fondly as she scooted closer to him.

"It's just boring stuff, you don't want to hear about it." He dismissed.

"No, tell me. I'm curious, I want to know." She smiled, resting her chin on his metal armour to peer at the ship. Through the Force, she could feel the butterflies erupting in his stomach. He loved when she took an interest in him and she knew it. Meanwhile, she felt sparks running through her body at the feeling of his toned muscles on her skin.

He let out a breathy chuckle before beginning his engineering rant. Her heart swelled with cuteness overload as he explained every step and every detail to her, and he looked so happy while doing it, as if one of his recurring daydreams had finally come true.

She wrapped her arms around his middle from the back, briefly nuzzling into his neck before turning her attention back to the ship. Her heart skipped a beat as she felt the muscles of his abdomen through his robes. Anakin froze as he felt her touch engulf him.

"Y/N..?" He hesitated.

"Yeah?" She asked, hoping he wouldn't make her pull away.

"Are you on death sticks?"

"No, Ani." She laughed, nuzzling her nose into the short curls on the back of his neck while she smiled.

"Well, then, um..." he hesitated. "...could you do this more often?"

"Aw, of course." She smiled as he melted into her embrace. He rested his hands on hers and continued explaining the final steps, every once in a while looking back to see her face.

When he finished, he was smiling like a happy child, finally getting the love and care he needed. They were both blushing furiously and smiling like idiots.

Ahsoka watched from afar with a smirk on her face, proud of her newfound matchmaking skills. Her heart burst with happiness as she saw Anakin press a kiss to Y/N's forehead, looking down at her as if she were his whole world.

Finally, the pining was over.

[demontonic]

Hayden Christensen - The first time

H.C x actor reader

In which you try to avoid him during training but it’s useless when Ewan puts you up against each other in a friendly match.

Word Count: 2099 words (que spiderman theme song. IM NOT JOKING THIS IS THE ACTUALLY COUNT)

You were new to the industry, you had only been in two movies thus far. The first one wasn’t big, it was just an indie film that horror movie nerds happened to like. From there you got picked for an audition for a bigger movie that would be put in a few theaters. However here, now, you’d never really expected such a huge change, you weren’t going to be playing a huge part. It was a flashback for the upcoming series Ahsoka, you were going to be a Jedi for a short time. They were doing another scene for order 66 in which Anakin goes against someone whom he’d become acquainted with during training. A battle was to be choreographed which meant you were going to be up against the actor who had single handedly started your acting career.

You were a huge Star Wars fan and without a doubt one of the kids who had lightsabers and a few Clone Wars coloring books. As you got older you looked into Anakin’s actor Hayden Christensen and grew to love the movies he’d done. Of course you thought he was hot, who wouldn’t love the nerd in Shattered Glass, or the punk in Life as a House? Sure he’s older now but that didn’t stop you from absolutely freezing up the second you walked into the training area. He’s significantly taller than you, that much you already knew but now it made you feel even more anxious. Interviews of him (which you of course obsessed over in your younger years) depicted him to be very nice, but you can’t always judge someone based on their interviews.

“Oh my god,” you whispered to yourself as you placed your hand to your cheek.

“Are you okay?” The trainer had questioned, a slight concern showing on her face. Hayden had also looked to you, the thin lightsaber prop swinging effortlessly to his side as he awaited your answer.

“Uh- Sorry I just got a… um- a headache is all.” You lied while your hands gripped onto the prop like it was the only thing grounding you.

“I have tylenol in my bag, or some water if you want?” Hayden’s hands gesture over to the black backpack that was leaned against the wall next to yours. Your throat ran dry as you opened your mouth to speak, before choking on your words and coughing… quite literally choking on your words.

“Yeah, the water should be fine.” Hayden walked over to his bag before pulling out two bottles and handing one to you. He stood there however as you took a small sip and placed it back down.

“Nervous?” He snickered lowly while he waited for you to collect yourself.

“Pfft… can you tell?” You questioned softly, looking up at his sparkling blue eyes. My god you’d dreamed about meeting him for practically half your life, but all you did was fumble. The casting crew never really gave you a lot of information, just that it was for upcoming Star Wars content and that they’d needed to fill a small jedi role. Nothing could’ve mentally prepared you to meet your living, breathing, wet dream.

“It’s just training right now, so there’s really no need to stress, we can all help you learn everything you’ll need to know.” His voice was so calm and endearing, maybe it was the daddy issues talking or the fact he is a dad, but it was so comforting.

Even three months into your training you’d distanced from Hayden as to not make a complete fool of yourself. He’s almost 40 at this point with a child you’d assume he was tired of the wild fans. Even so during training you’d often slip up while your eyes were trained on his swift movements. Sometimes you guys would get together and have little matches to see who could win. It was a random pick or whoever decided to challenge someone, and it was no different today. Everyone had finished training but the energy had been so vibrant that here you were on the cushioned floor in a circle. At this point it was no secret your character and Anakin were to have a final battle, but you had never gone against each other in these matches.

“Okay before we start, would anyone like to call someone out?” Rosario Dawson, Hayden’s childhood friend who’d been training for a separate project, questioned the small group.

“This isn’t a call out but I’d actually like to see Hayden vs Y/N without their choreography.” Ewan suggested while sitting on the blue mat cross legged, a childlike smile on his face. On one hand you were a shell of a human around Hayden, but with Ewan it was like he was your favorite uncle. Had you at some point in time found him incomprehensibly attractive? Yeah, but he’s the kind of nice that makes you feel like you’ve known him your entire life.

“Oh come on, is that even fair?” You whined, alluding to the obvious experience points he had on you.

“Are you calling me old?” Hayden jokes lightly as he steps forward into the circle, the group collectively letting out a low ‘oooooooh’.

“I mean your character is the chosen one, I don’t know if my three months of training can compare.” In all honesty you had tried your hand occasionally at a lightsaber when you were younger, so you had a little bit more experience than you let on. The amount of times you’d watched the behind the scenes,their practicing and training helped you recognize his moves.

“I’ll go easy on you, how about that?” His arms were outstretched to his sides in a shrug. A smirk was playing on his lips as he stared at you expectantly.

“Easy? Okay Christensen I’ll fight you.” Competitive couldn’t even begin to describe the drive that suddenly pumped through your veins. The way his eyes zeroed in on you, and the familiar smirk you had only dreamed of seeing in person made your adrenaline kick in. All the information you’d ever retained while watching those extras, would finally be useful for more than proving a point in a dumb argument online.

“Let’s not forget who’s had more training.” Hayden said with a scoff as you both got into your beginning stances. Yours mimicking the form Obi-Wan took while fighting Grievous, Ewan didn’t miss it, how could he? He simply stood with his left foot pointing towards you, his right braced for a sprint, and his saber behind him ready for a strike. You were reading him like a billboard, he never strayed from the forms he was taught, but you were a fan with too much time so you had a few of your own moves.

“May the force be with you Master Skywalker.” You said before he charged, you dodged the first strike but he had already begun to recover from the miss. A huff came from his chest as he swung the flimsy pole back down, meeting yours with a loud clash. The group let out sounds of shock and excitement as he pushed you down to one knee, he was stronger than you. It was no secret as height wise he’s an entire foot taller than you, so you quickly rolled from your position in front of him. He stumbled forward slightly, then twisted around to meet your blows. One to the head, down to the legs, up to the arm, then back down to his torso since it would be an awkward position for him to hold. You were both fast, you’d spent so much time learning basic defense in case one of you made a mistake it was too easy. Stamina was probably the only way you’d win this, or so you thought.

“You’ve learned well, young one,” he tripped you up, while you were focused on his words he’d hit you with the same move Anakin used on count Dooku. “although you’re too focused on me,” your ‘saber’ swung upward to slash his torso, but with a small step back, he dropped the pole to his open palm.

“And not my hands.”

“Fuck.”

The cool, thin, dented metal was up against the side of your neck as your arms were still tilted up in your last strike. Heavy breaths left the both of you as your small ‘audience’ went silent. The sound of your pole hitting the mat, signaled your defeat and in true style you dropped to the floor. The room erupted with groans and yells of victory from those who bet on Hayden. A few seconds of lying on the floor Hayden walked over, standing above you holding out his hand.

“Come on loser.” His smile was so genuine it made your face blush softly as you rolled onto your back.

“I can’t, I’m dead, rigor mortis.” You mumble, letting your tongue hang out the side of your mouth. You felt two arms scoot under your back and knees, quickly feeling your body lifted into the air. A scream came out of your throat as your hand quickly gripped onto Hayden’s loose shirt. The group laughed as he basically tossed you up and down, pretending like he was going to drop you.

“I don’t know why you’re screaming! Dead people don’t scream!”

“Oh- OH MY- PLEASE! GOD PLEASE! OBI WAN PLEASE!” He’d even managed to flip you on your stomach, your fingertips almost meeting the ground before he flung you back up again. Sure it wasn’t a crazt high distance from his arms, but add that with his height it was terrifying enough.

“So uncivilized!” Ewan mocked in a bad Obi-Wan voice, Hayden finally held you against his chest as he laughed with the rest of the group. Ewan came over with Rosario, both of them cooing softly at your semi panicked state.

“Put the poor girl down already!”

“She’s as red as a tomato Hayden!”

He let you down to your feet, still holding onto you as you stumbled lightly. Your chest heaved as you rested your hands on your knees, completely oblivious to how you practically pushed against Hayden’s crotch. His hand came down to rest on your lower back, rubbing softly while you regained your breath.

“I’m-… I’ll kill you for that one day Christensen.” You said through heavy breaths before standing straight again. Hayden’s hand coming up to rest on your shoulder, sporting a smug smile as the group began to discuss the next match. Hayden pulled you off the far walls where your bags lay, you both sitting in front of each other while he pulled out water bottles. For a while you sat in silence, just leaning against the wall watching Rosario and Ewan go at it.

“Were you ever going to tell me about your tattoo?” Hayden questioned, his voice staying low in contrast with the yelling from the group. At first you almost didn’t know what he was talking about, but then your cheeks turned to a dark red. On your wrist was the japor snippet Anakin gave Padme when they first met, and under it read ‘Skywalker’ in Huttese. Usually it was covered by a scrunchie or bracelet, but it must’ve slipped your mind today.

“I wasn’t planning on it, it feels too embarrassing to show you.” You held your arm out to him, since he’d already seen it there was no use in hiding it now. His hand pulled your wrist closer as he traced it with his fingers.

“I always wanted to get a replica of the japor snippet but I never did. I think this is really cool Y/N, you don’t need to be so nervous around me all the time.” He said quietly as he set your arm down on your thigh. Hayden was nice, but you were feral, you still couldn’t grasp the fact you avoided him like a schoolgirl avoided her crush.

“I-… I am not! The job is just so… overwhelming you know?” Lies, you shook as bad as a chihuahua when you were alone with him, practicing lines, fighting, and in general.

“It’s been three months and you still get distracted by just staring at me mid-fight.” A chuckle resonated in his chest as you looked at your blushing face.

“Okay… I just didn’t want to look like some nerdy, obsessed fangirl, I didn’t know how well that would go over.” Holding the cool bottle against your face you let your hair shield your face from the older man.

“I think it’s cute.”

And for the first time, you felt like maybe the star would align, maybe you would have a chance with the man you’d worshipped during your teen years.

I need to be his controversially young girlfriend HIS BIRTHDAY IS THE DAY AFTER MINE idk i think its a sign or whatever🤞🏼 hope you liked this! feel free to make any requests! i might make a part two but idk yet

Masterlist

[reverie-verse]

Anakin Skywalker x Reader: Crabbiness Equals Love

Prompt: You’re from Earth, He’s from a Galaxy from far away. You’re sort of a normal person, and he’s a Jedi, that’s tasked with bringing you back to the council. You’ve known him for a few months and you’ve both had a rocky relationship, you’re friendly one minute and arguing the next. But what happens when the two of you are finally forced to work together? Things tend to come to light in odd ways…

Enemies + Friends =Love 🫶🏽🥹😊

Fluff this is definitely fluff😊

Yes I gave you knowledge in fighting because let’s face it, ain’t nobody safe out here in these streets. 😩😬

You have some knowledge in technology of the ship, given that you’re an engineer. 🤷🏽‍♀️ It’s how I developed the story😩

————————————————

“ Master, we've been stranded out here for two days! Go talk to her.” Ahsoka points out to you, Anakin had his arms crossed, staring off into the distance. Rex tried his best not to laugh, taking it as his cue to visit and speak with Obi Wan.

“ No” Anakin doesn’t budge, instead he sighs a deep sigh.

“Master, can’t you see how hard she’s working over there, tinkering away on the ship. Even R2 is going over there to help her out”Ahsoka tried a different approach, sounds of metal and sparks could be heard, R2 makes his little way across the dirt to get to you.

“ She's fine. She doesn’t need my help.” He continues his long distance staring, his stubbornness at an all time high. Ahsoka groans, throwing her hands up in the air. She turns away from Anakin making her way towards the ship. She could hear you cursing as you were banging on the pieces of the ship. She shook her head figuring she’d have to try to persuade you to speak with him.

“ Y/N?!” She calls out to you.

“ What?!” You replied as you twisted a piece of electrical together.

“What’s going on between the both of you?” Ahsoka lifts her eyebrow up at you, as she peeks into the little hole of which you worked out of.

“ Nothing” You replied, taking to wires and conjoining them, testing out to see if they’d work.

“ Really? Why do I get the feeling it’s not true” Ahsoka says sneakily, trying to get you to explain the situation. Or maybe reveal a detail about the relationship between the two of you.

“ No-Well-No-you know what, I need a power converter. I can’t do this without it, and that means I need to go into the city” You changed the subject avoiding Ahsoka’s statement.

“ Great!-“ Ahsoka smiles “-Anakin will go with you- ANAKIN! You have to go with Y/N to the city!” Ahsoka turns on her heel, making her way out the ship and to her Master. Anakin had moved to stand next to Obi Wan and Rex.

“ No, you go with her” He shakes his head, he refuses to be with you right now.

Obi Wan only smirks before speaking out “ I agree with your padawan, I think you should go with Y/N”

“ I don’t care what my padawan thinks, I’m in charge” He retorts.

“ Yes, while that is true, but I out rank all of you, so you will go with Y/N to the city,” Obi Wan replied as he rested a hand under his chin. You were standing at the end of the ramp. You grit your teeth, clenching your fists. Ahsoka smiles from ear to ear, Rex had to turn away from the scene.

You and Anakin both glared at each other. The word “Fine” left both of your lips roughly, as the irritation builds between the two of you.

“ Get your cloak” Anakin orders.

“ I am getting my cloak-here’s yours asshole” You threw his cloak at his face while you tugged yours on.

Anakin glared at you, catching it with ease shrugging it on. “ What did you just call me?”

“ I called you a-“

“ -Be safe you two! We’ll watch the ship while you’re gone!” Ahsoka interrupted you as she ushered the two of you along. From the looks of it, the two of you walked with a large amount of space between you, neither one of you wanting to be near one another. It was quite amusing to be honest.

Rex shook his head, a smile on his face “ Are you sure you want to send just the two of them? They might end up killing each other.”

“ Captain Rex, the hope is that they won’t kill each other. Maybe by the end of this the two will get along. “ Obi Wan sighs, shaking his head.

————

The two of you neared the city limits, as the two of you were about to enter, Anakin pulled his hood upon his head shielding his face, causing you to do the same. Both of you instinctively inch closer together, as your eyes surveyed the crowd. “ Stick close and don’t touch anything” Anakin whispers to you.

“ Oh come on, what are you, my gatekeeper? It’s not like I planned to touch everything while in the process of running away.” You replied sarcastically, your eyes landed on a building that looked as if it sold parts. That was the first shop you intended to visit, you began to move in that direction, Anakin hot on your heels, his eyes never drifting from the crowd.

“ No but you aren’t a jedi either, so someone has to watch you” He retorts, as he quickly wraps a hand around your bicep, pulling you back into him, to keep the creature walking past you, from crashing into you. His grip on you wasn’t as hard as you’d expect. He held you firmly but not enough to cause bruising. Interesting. You were less timid from the time you were first introduced to this life. By now you were becoming accustomed to it, the creatures, and the planets. The life of the galaxy.

“ Yeah well, I don’t need a babysitter. And who's to say I won’t become one just to spite you.” You yank your arm out of his grasp opening the door, your eyes looking for the section of materials you need.

“ Y/N that’s not how that works-What is your problem?” Anakin asks as he surveys the shop.

“ My problem? I should be asking you that, you're the one who’s got a stick shoved up his ass twenty-four seven.” You had finally found the piece you were looking for, you grabbed it turning to Anakin to show him the piece that you found. He of course had to make sure it was in good shape and condition before purchasing the item.

“ What’s that supposed to mean?” He asks you in confusion.

“ It means that you’re crabby all the time, at least with me. You're not that way with Ahsoka, Obi Wan or even Rex. Or that Senator woman” You take the item off the counter carrying it in your arms, Anakin takes his leftover credits, placing them in his pocket.

“ That ‘senator woman’ has a name, there’s nothing going on between her and I…-I’m not crabby with you all the time..” He tries to defend, as he ushers you outside, he makes sure to place an arm around your waist, keeping you close. He could feel an uneasy disturbance through the force, someone was here, and he could feel their eyes on you both.

“ Really? Cuuzzz it kinda looks like it- Listen all I’m saying is that ever since you and your space warriors came to earth to take me away on your little spaceship. You were fine but then after that two week grace period you’ve been nothing but crabby-hey!” Anakin pulls you into an alleyway behind a bin, his large hand covers, your mouth, your back pressed tightly to his chest, his side pressed against the wall, shielding you from the creatures who stopped at the alleyway.

“ Which way did they go?” One hisses out.

“ I don’t know, I lost them in the alleyway”

“ She’s with a jedi” Another growls.

“ So, it’s just one jedi against the four of us.-” The other voice chuckled darkly. Anakin’s com link blink, a sound emitted from it. You looked up at him as he looked down at you, he let go of your mouth as the two of you rushed to turn it off. Obi Wan’s voice comes through before you both could get to the button.

“ Anakin, where are you two? I do hope that you aren’t fighting. Ahsoka has finished a portion of Y/N’s work we still need that other piece-”

“ Did you hear that? It sounds like we got company” The group inched further into the alleyway.

“ Anakin? Come in, Anakin?” Obi Wan’s voice grew more irritated by the second.

“ Awe man, does that mean we gotta fight the lizard people?” You looked towards Anakin who was shaking his head at your reluctance.

“ Yeah-” His answer was short as he moved you out of the way, he lifted his wrist to his mouth “Obi Wan I’m a little busy right now, we’ll get there as fast as we can-”. Anakin pulled out his lightsaber, igniting it as the group of four closed on you both. You moved off to the side, your eyes landing on a speeder that remained stationed on the side, the owner nowhere in sight. The group grew closer, lifting their weapons up, pointing at the two of you.

“We take them together-Y/N?!” Anakin calls out to you as you take off running. You threw whatever object you found on the ground at one of the lizard guys. Using him as leverage you knocked the weapon out of the other guy's hand, the three of you now engaged in hand to hand combat. Anakin deflects the shots taking down his enemies. He too, is engaged in hand to hand combat, as he easily takes them down. However one of the enemies pressed a button on their wrist signaling for back up, a much larger group of thugs emerged from the opposite end of the alleyway.

“ Shit there’s more?!-“ As you both fought.

“ What did you expect, for there to be less?!” Anakin yells back as he kicks his opponent back.

“ I don’t know, maybe?!-“ You socked your opponent in the face, as he ducked your eyes landed on a speeder across the way,”- Anakin the speeder!” You yelled as you flipped a guy over, rolling yourself over his body, using his weapon to shoot at the other men.

“ I know-Let’s go!” Anakin twirls his lightsaber blocking off the shots, he slices one weapon in half as he force pushes his enemy away. You took off running for the speeder, Anakin following behind you. The two of you weave through the crowd, getting on just as the owner walked out of a nearby shop. The two of you hopped in starting it right away. Anakin drove the speeder while you sat facing the back of the speeder pointing your weapon at the enemies. As they fired at you both, you fired back at them, Anakin swerved through traffic. He makes a hard turn causing you to slide over, losing your shot.

“ Damnit!-” You shouted as you realigned your targets.

Anakin too busy lost in thought he smashes his foot on the break causing you to yet again lose your shot and slam into the dashboard. “ Anakin?!” You glared at him.

“ You think I’m crabby?!” The vehicle completely stopped in the middle of traffic. Anakin turned to look at you.

“ What?!” You replied in disbelief and shock.

“ Do you?” He insisted.

“ Are you kidding me right now?! We are in the middle of a speed chase and you want to talk about being crabby?!-“ Your grabbed your weapon, fixing yourself back into your position as the other speeders got closer. “-Now’s the time to start moving!”

“ I’m finishing the conversation we had earlier! Answer the question!” Anakin was determined.

“ Are you-Fine-Yes I do! Are you happy now? Will you stop arguing with me and drive?!” You started firing, hitting one of the targets causing them to fall off their speeder and crash into a building. You switch targets aiming for another one, you follow it.

“No I’m not crabby! No, I won't drive, not until we sort this out- together!” He crosses his arms.

You looked away from your target glaring at him “So help me-if you don’t start this damn vehicle-ugh fuck it!” You pull back your weapon slamming your foot down on the gas, Anakin momentarily takes his foot off the break, the two of you once again swerving out of traffic. Half of your body rests on top of him as you move through the current of vehicles, you aim to get the hell out of dodge. Anakin switched seats with you, allowing you to take hold of the driver's seat, and him the passenger. A hand that belonged to Anakin as he gripped onto your shirt holding you in place to keep you from falling out. The two of you shifted from side to side from your aggressive turn. The two of you barely make it out of the city, leaving the thugs behind in the dust so to speak.

The heat of your skin pouring through your shirt, it warmed his hand. For a second Anakin thought of what it might feel like to touch your skin. To feel the heat of it against his. The chemistry between you too was undeniable, the level of comfortability has always been there. For Anakin you were the one person he could be himself around. He could be sad, mad, sweet, humorous, annoying, over confident, and boyish. But you, you were honest, sarcastic, you were hilarious, you were kind and charismatic. You were right though, he was being a dick to you, sort of these past few weeks. When he first met you, you were kind and you offered to help where you could and when you could. He liked that about you-there were a lot of things he liked about you-he just wasn’t ready to admit it-not with so many people around…

By the time you reached the ship, you threw your cloak off and to the side of the ship with Anakin hot on your heels. Ooo you were so mad, you could literally murder him, not really but you wanted him to trip and fall on his stupid pretty face. Ugggghhhh. You grabbed the piece that Anakin helped you buy from the shop getting ready to work on it. Ahsoka, and Rex seemed to find a way to make themselves busy. Obi Wan held an amused smile on his face. “ I take it the two of you are still working on some things”

“ Something like that” Anakin shrugs with a smirk on his face as if he had a plan set in motion. A plan that only he wanted to know, Obi wan shakes his head smiling to himself. The two head to the cockpit with Rex following behind. Ahsoka, joins you in finishing your work with the converter, the ship finally starting up allowing you all to leave the planet.

——

You were sitting at the table near the kitchen of the ship, you had a cup of water. Your hair pulled out of its tight hold, allowing it to be in its natural state. You had your hands cupped around the cup itself, you stared down into it. Your mind adrift, your thoughts chaotic, you were perplexed, confused, exhausted and attracted to someone who might be attracted to someone else. Anakin was Anakin, you knew that and you knew the type of person he was. Sure the two of you hadn’t always fought, there were times you guys actually got along but right now he was insufferable. Annoying, he got under your skin on purpose, you just know it.

You rubbed your eyes, heaving a sigh, as if on cue Anakin himself walks into space. As if he had known you’d be thinking about him. You stood up taking your cup with you, you walked to the sink pouring it out and washing before setting it back on the rack. You turned to leave the space but not before Anakin reached a hand out grabbing your arm, causing you to stop in your tracks. “ Hey, hold on” He says softly.

“ Why? So you can irritate me some more, no thanks-“You moved to pull your arm out of his grasp.

“No, but I’m tired of arguing,” He admits.

You lift an eyebrow at him “ Really?”

“ Yes..and I’m sorry.” He says, his face contorting into a softer look.

“ For?” You sighed.

“ For my crabbiness” He couldn’t help but smile.

“Anakin.” You groaned.

“ Y/N” He whispered back, the grin never leaving his face, a chuckle rumbles from his chest.

“ That’s not funny,-” You tell him, a small smile of your own fights it’s way into your face.”-But, apology accepted I guess. I’m sorry for calling you crabby.”

“No need to apologize for it, I was an asshole these past couple weeks..” He looks down at the floor before looking back up to you “-As for the senator, it’s complicated.”

“ You were a pain in my ass…But tell me about your situation maybe I can help” Your hip leaned against the counter, your arms crossed. Your heart hammers in your chest at the same time sinking.

“She’s only a few years older than I am, she’s all I’ve ever known, she’s familiar” His hip against the counter matching your body language, Anakin completely faces you, he’s standing a little closer than he was before but not enough to force you to look up at him.

“But I thought Jedi aren’t allowed to fall in love”Your head tilts slightly to the side as you pondered the thought of it, Anakin tried not to follow your head movement, it was cute, your curiosity.

“ Well attachments are forbidden, possession is forbidden, but compassion is unconditional love- also forbidden-but these things…are crucial to a Jedi’s life” He smiles softly.

You squint your eyes at him “ I don’t-are you sure? Cuz I don’t think that’s-what the Jedi meant when they said forbidden..”

“ Y/N” He huffs.

“ Okay cool we’re just gonna ignore the code got it. So I assume that your friendship between the Senator and you has blossomed into-something more?” You gestured to him with your hand.

“ No, not exactly”

“ No? Wait hold on. You just said she was familiar, I’m lost- then who are you talking about?” Your eyebrows creased together.

“ She is familiar as a friend, someone like Obi Wan or Ashoka. I thought that she would mean more to me but then there was you” He whispered gently, he moved from the counter's edge, stepping closer to you, his hands taking hold of your hips pulling you towards him. Chest to chest his head angles downwards, your head cranked up to look at him.

“ Me?” Your eyebrows shoot upwards in surprise.

“ Yes, you. I can breathe when I’m around you, I can think, I can feel the weight of the order and the galaxy lift off my shoulders. You challenge me, you intrigue me, you guide me, you show me how to be better.” he dipped his head closer to yours, nudging his nose with yours. Your body and mind give you away instantly, melting in his hold, it was something you realized you hadn’t felt in a long time. His touch was intoxicating, and to him you were breathtaking. Such a quick switch of emotions, but he was done pushing you away, and you were done with ignoring how you felt about him.

You whispered, sucking in a breath before releasing it, “ I-You-This-Please tell me this isn’t a joke, cuz that would be really mean.”

“ If I was joking I wouldn’t have confessed the way I did. ” He smiles, one hand lifting up to cup your jaw, his thumb grazing against your cheek, he rubs his nose with yours as tilting his head to the opposite side. Within a second his lips were on yours, your hands grip his clothes, the hand around your waist tucks you further into his body, the hand that held your jaw, his long fingers connecting with the back of your head and hair. The two of you twisted in opposite directions, his lips engulfing yours in such a sweet, passionate languid pace though it quickly turned into a frenzy of rushed kisses. He was practically devouring you and you were fighting to keep up with him. You had to pull back needing air, you shook your eye, you needed to calm down for a second.

Anakin smirks, your eyes searching his face, his hair falling out of place, his lips swollen-“Shiiitttt, you’re dangerous-” You admit your chest heaving up and down, causing him to laugh. His hand slips from your neck and cheek moving to join his other hand around your waist.“-No I am serious, no wonder why so many women, and men fall at your feet” You laughed with him. He buries his head in the crook of your neck. Your arms wrapping around him holding him in place.

“ Mmm I don’t know what you’re talking about-” His lips move against your hot skin as he speaks.

Ahsoka steps through the threshold with a grin of her own “ -I take it all is well?” She asks, her voice startling you both, Anakin releases you, the warmth of him slipping away along with him. You lean with your back against the counter, your hands resting on top of it.

“ What, do you want snips?” He huffs as he stood half way in front of you.

“ Oh you know, just checking up on my Master and friend-” Ahsoka smirks as she lifts an eyebrow between the two of you. “-And to tell you both that we are nearing coruscant. Obi Wan wants you both up front.”

“ Thank you!” You tilt your head to the side to look past Anakin, giving her a sweet smile. Ahsoka nods as she walks away from the door moving towards the cockpit. Anakin turned to you causing you to shrug offering him the same smile. “That’s our cue” you push off the counter heading out to the hall.

Anakin follows behind you as he leans close to your ear “This isn’t over” He whispers to you, he kisses your cheek slipping into the cockpit. You rolled your eyes at him, which only made him grin from ear to ear. The two of you take your seats, Obi Wan and Rex piloting, Ahsoka in front of you.

“ Oh good, the two of you are finally getting along.” Obi Wan states. The two of you looking anywhere but at each other, sharing what could only be described as happy and secretly enjoying the new found relationship.

[lightwise]

I Never Gave Up On You

Optimism and Redemption: How Luke and Omega are the only people who could have reached Anakin/Vader and Crosshair in their darkest moments

Unfortunately, I don't feel like pulling a bunch of screenshots for this one, so bear with me.

There's a really beautiful parallel between Luke and Omega as the bright-eyed, young, slightly naive but endlessly optimistic characters who are the ones capable of reaching out to and believing in Vader and Crosshair enough to help bring them back to the light.

They see the best in people. They both have their moments of complaining or becoming impatient with their circumstances or surroundings, but when it comes to people, they are bottomless wells of patience and optimism. They don't ignore or overlook the bad things that Vader and Crosshair have done, even to them, but they don't hold those things against them and believe that they can change their ways.

They value family. While both of them would show compassion to anyone, there is a special bond to people they consider family that opens up even more of their tenderheartedness. And they capitalize on it.

They have distance from the worst things the other has done. Now what do I mean by this? I have often thought about how out of Obi-Wan, Ahsoka, Padme, and Luke, the people who loved and knew Anakin the most, only Luke was able to actually save him. I believe it's partly because Luke wasn't actually there for Anakin's fall to the dark side, his crimes as Vader, the depths of his hatred and hurt that he leveraged against Obi-Wan, Ahsoka, and Padme numerous times. Those three had seen the worst of Anakin/Vader and been burned by it, and while Padme did hold out hope, even she couldn't reach him. Obi-Wan and Ahsoka eventually gave up, because they had been hurt too often and there was too much proverbial water under the bridge. Luke, however, while he did have ways in which he was hurt by Vader, could separate Vader from the Anakin he had been told about, and could see how that person was still inside the masked Sith who cut off his hand. He didn't have a lifetime of irreparable damage to overcome. And he kept choosing to call out to Anakin, his father, and ask him to make the right choice, even if it meant he (Luke) could die in the process. Similarly with Omega and Crosshair, while she was there when Crosshair was led away from them all and had his chip enhanced, and all the times that he shot at them and hunted them down and betrayed them, she didn't have a prior deep relationship with him that was ruptured by these incidents. She could see his true nature and the good in him, and was hurt by his choices but not wounded in the same ways that Hunter, Wrecker, and Tech were after watching the sibling they had grown up with turn into seemingly a different person. Hunter especially gave up hope, and Wrecker and Tech were willing to let Crosshair make his own decisions. But Omega knew that Crosshair was more than what he had chosen for himself, that he was her brother, and she never stopped reflecting the light she saw in him back to him until he was able to grasp onto it for himself. She refused to leave him behind, even at the risk of her own safety.

They succeeded. Where others had tried and failed (even with the same amount of loving and caring and persistence for a time), Luke and Omega never gave up hope. And they got to see the fruit of their efforts. Vader and Crosshair were so closed off, so thoroughly convinced that their choices had made them irredeemable, so hated themselves, that they refused any and all help until someone was willing to be that bridge for them one more time. And it's really beautiful to see the results.

[david-talks-sw]

The fact that Dave Filoni called Anakin “the greatest Jedi ever” is proof that he’s bias AF. His anti-Jedi rhetoric is bupkis.

I wonder if he means "the greatest" in terms of in-universe fame...?

Dunno if this is the case in Canon (then again Dave Filoni blatantly ignores any *non-motion* transmedia elements in Canon so meh), but in Legends he's:

"Anakin Skywalker, the Hero with no Fear™, handsome, dashing, the face of the Republic's army during the Clone War, the only Jedi who tried to resist the nefarious Order's coup and was treacherously murdered for it".

And I seem to remember that, in Canon, he's like the Jedi Temple's superstar anyway, every Jedi recognizes him on sight. I mean, that line from Baylon about "Anakin speaking highly of Ahsoka" must have some meaning beyond artificial personal stakes.

So from a fame and a "power level" standpoint... sure.

He's the greatest.

I'm giving Filoni the benefit of the doubt.

While I've talked about why Filoni's entire headcanon about the Jedi doesn't track with what George Lucas' intended narrative, I think it's worth acknowledging that Filoni's bias comes from part of his duties while directing The Clone Wars was.

One of the goals of TCW was humanizing Anakin, expanding upon his character make him go from "a character whose only purposes is to embody the themes presented in three movies based on the matinee serial format" to a relatable person, a good man, the hero Ben mentions to Luke in A New Hope.

I think it's normal that he'll see Anakin in a more positive light.

Also (and full disclosure this is just me theorizing I am no authority on any of this so if turns out I'm wrong just come right out and say so)...

I'm pretty sure that Filoni, Lesley Headland and most of the recent Star Wars authors are all Gen X, raised by baby boomers forced to conform to society, obey authority and have proper decorum (boys don't cry!) all of which they strove to rebel against. Add to that the corruption they witnessed growing up and coming out of high school, and you see a kind of jadedness emerge. "The rules aren't as black and white, the world is grey."

So while most of them and the boomers despised the Prequels upon release, a few of them projected a more individualistic headcanon onto those movies that fit with where their head was, at the time.

As such: Anakin isn't interpreted by them as a cautionary tale about what happens when you're greedy. He's a misunderstood rebel, a non-conformist who has his flaws but is ultimately good at heart. Which isn't entirely inaccurate, but it is very clearly an embellishment of a character who will one day become a space nazi.

The fact is... the Prequels were made by a boomer. One with very liberal values and who was himself a rebel, but a boomer all the same. The whole point of his story is...

"we all must come together and fight as one, if push comes to shove; we must all be compassionate and selfless if we are to survive; don't be greedy, let people go when it's their time to leave".

And then he makes the Jedi say that, making them beacons of truth and good and compassion in his fairy tale, now aimed at Gen Z kids.

Gen X-ers hear/read that and project all the boomer BS they had been told onto the Jedi...

"oh, so the Jedi are saying you shouldn't love yourself, you shouldn't be yourself, you should give up on what makes you an individual to fit in, you shouldn't feel any emotions"

Because nobody is that good, realistically, right?

This happened in other mediums. The one that comes to mind on the spot is the relationship between Mufasa and Scar.

In The Lion King, Mufasa is strong and noble, Scar is weak and conniving. Simple enough. Around that same time, in A Tale of Two Brothers, young Mufasa is shown to be pretty nice with Taka (Scar), who is framed as a spoiled brat to begin with.

Skip to the 2019 remake, and it's hinted Mufasa gave Scar his wound, and in The Lion Guard they explain that Scar got his nickname from Mufasa mocking him for a misadventure.

He went from being a noble king to a bully who had it coming, Scar is an underdog who got picked on. Because again: nobody is that pure, right? Fairytales be-damned.

Nothing is black and white, it's all grey.

So yeah, long story short I do think that Filoni being part of the generation that wasn't the target demographic but was old enough to retcon the crap out of the Prequels also plays a role into his view of Anakin.

[wlwanakin]

god you're so right about how messed up the obi-wan/anakin/ahsoka dynamic is. it's like: your dad had you way too young, never forgot it and never let you forget it, and the moment you've achieved some independence he has another kid.

and like. you know that this kid is going to have to be your baby, because your father is not qualified to raise her, so it falls to 19-20 yr old you to keep this child alive. anakin is the true teen mom of star wars, tbh

RIGHT!!!! RIGHT!!!! like it’s that. it’s not that but emotionally it is that!!!! and it’s sooo fucked in ways that feel under-acknowledged cuz the show itself is like “but it’s fine! look how well these three get on” but also i don’t care what the show says (except when it’s good in which case i do care. i care So Much). i’m gonna talk about how it’s fucked!! and like, in general it’s the kind of a recipe for extreme tension and resentment and anakin not letting ahsoka be subject to any of that is maybe one of the acts that got him into force heaven two decades later, because anakin grew up being silently resented by obi-wan a bit (in some ways A Lot) and like you can talk about the cycles of it all but that is a very important aspect of it that anakin ensured he did Not continue! but like goddd you cannot tell me there was no resentment towards obi-wan about it all that nagged at him, especially since obi-wan likes ahsoka so much, and frankly obi-wan and anakin are a classic case of parent and child who simply would not like each other if they met as unrelated individuals, and boy oh boy is that a miserable thing to be. and i think it’s unrealistic that all this weirdness just evaded ahsoka too so i’m sure she has her own complexes. being an unwanted child whose custody got passed off bc your religious order decided to use you as a character-building tool (did she ever find out about this. if she ever found out about this it’d be crazy. i like to think she did) is never smooth sailing even your not-teen brother-mom loves you so so much and actually expresses it (UNLIKE SOMEONE ELSE I KNOW).

and anakin really IS the teen mom lol, and i find that funny both bc he’s much closer to an Actual teen mom age wise while obi-wan (designated teen mom by fandom including me bc he acts like one) was fucking 25, and bc anakin was the MORE SUCCESSFUL ONE. like not only was he given a padawan when he was 5-6 years younger than obi-wan was on the frontlines of a WAR he also got over the whole not wanting her thing like super duper fast and despite being the most insane woman alive he actually did a pretty good job and ahsoka ended up being really well-adjusted forever (which is in part stupid bad writing but also i do think anakin gave her the best child soldier experience one could be given…also fucked to think about if you wanna chew on that). like i increasingly don’t care for tcw as the years go on but ahsoka and anakin’s dynamic will be close to my heart forever and ever and that is partially bc the circumstances are so deeply fucked

[saviinika]

Just a boy standing in front of a boy

Last WIP wednesday before @codywanweek and I'm eeeeeeeeee with excitement. The clip is from a hurt/comfort fic; Cody is hurt, and Obi-Wan is leaving him voice journals so he doesn't feel like he's missed anything while in the bacta tank. Because that's what totally platonic colleagues humans do for one another.

---

“Is now a good time to tell you that as a result of my year with the Duchess during my Padawan days, Iam fluent in Mando’a? I suppose better late than never, really. I apologize for deceiving you and your brothers for so long, or making it seem like there was a necessity for private conversations around me. It was certainly never my intent; it just never seemed like a good time to tell you, especially when many of the topics of discussion were clearly not meant for my ears. I can’t say I blame you for the cold shoulder you gave both her and I during our whole escort fiasco evading Death Watch. I should have been more open about my pre-existing relationship with her. Hmm. That’s not the right phrasing. ‘Historical relationship’, perhaps. And yes, though she did say she loved me, and at one time I thought I had loved her, I would have been miserable had I stayed with her like I wanted when I was eighteen. You make my life so much brighter, my dear. I don’t think I would be a very likeable man had we never met.”

“You know, I did like Boil’s treatise on why all Jedi should have retractible cords around their wrists to better keep track of their lightsabers. I’ll be honest, for all my repeatedly reminding Anakin and Ahsoka to hold onto theirs, I think mine has decided to run away on purpose because it likes you, darling. There’s certainly no other logical reason why I lose it so often or why it always makes its way into your hands. Kyber crystal, which makes up the heart of every Jedi’s saber, is a Force-sensitive material and as such, exceedingly rare. Jedi do not choose the crystal that powers their sabers; the crystal, or crystals, choose them. And mineseems to have chosen you too. Forgive my chuckle, it’s just that every time you return it, my crystal is humming the most pleasing song. So you see, I’m afraid the evidence is strongly in your favour. Perhaps I should consider letting you train with it. You’re brilliant, and eminently capable, so basic Soresu wouldn’t be hard to pass on. If you’re going to keep finding it, you might as well be able to wield it effectively in your own defence.”

“There’s some sort of commotion happening with Rex and your Clone Force 99. You really will have to tell me the story some day of how you managed to ensure the loyalty of those four vode. They seem so far removed from your preferred method of warfare, although honestly, you did have to get your penchant for taking on BD-1s with your fists from somewhere. Anyway, Anakin is leaving with them shortly and Kix did let me go to bid them farewell under Mace’s heavy-handed supervision. To my surprise, he commented that I was looking rested and better fed. I suppose if the Master of the Order could tell that I was wearing myself too thinly, perhaps I wasn’t doing as good a job at muddling through as I thought. Oh, Helix is here now and he wants you to know that he scoffed at me for saying that. He also says that he finds these voice notes I’m making for you ador— No, I am not telling him that. Sorry for being overly familiar there, my dear. It’s hard to do this with an audience.”

[gffa]

Something I really, really liked about the first two Ahsoka episodes is just how prickly Ahsoka is when she doesn’t want to deal with something. She’s not handling everything with Sabine all that well, she’s still hung up on her guilt about Anakin even almost three decades later, to the point that it’s spilling over onto her relationship with Sabine, she still feels distant from Hera, she’s downright almost mean to Sabine after she loses the map, there’s very little sense of whimsy or fun to her, she’s calm on the surface, but very much still a hot mess underneath. Felony gets a lot of shit for the way he talks about his favorite character (and not undeservedly so) but the way he writes her here, is not actually a perfect character but instead a complicated and thorny character who is legitimately really, really engaging to me and is allowed the room to make mistakes and be messy. She is not the most True Jedi Who Ever Was. She’s still ignoring her feelings! She’s still afraid to let go of Anakin! She’s still holding herself at arm’s length because she’s scared of losing people and being hurt again! These are all things that are foundational to being a Jedi to deal with! And she doesn’t! Because she tells herself she’s not a Jedi and so she doesn’t have to do the things a Jedi needs to do, doesn’t have to confront and let go of her feelings, and she just leaves things where they lie! And it makes her relationships prickly and clouded and messy, all while being completely understadable, she was dealt a hand that’s an impossible mountain to climb, with leaving the Jedi Order, with the genocide of her people, with the death of her entire extended family, with the Force being darkened by the Sith, with the devastating truth about Anakin, with never being able to go back to the Jedi Order like she wanted because the Jedi Order was stolen from her--all of that is a deep level of trauma that haunts her and she hasn’t pulled it out of her heart yet, and it makes me love her all the more. This show said, “Let Ahsoka be a living, breathing character who has a story worth telling because it’s not easy and it’s not perfect, but it’s heartfelt and deeply caring.” and then gave it to us.

[fellthemarvelous]

Not to be divisive in the SW fandom (like that's hard), but I love Sabine's journey as the next Mandalorian Jedi.

It doesn't matter that she doesn't have a high M-count. Not all of the Inquisitors had high M-counts either but they were still able to control the Force.

Sabine's M-count is under 7,000, which is 20,000+ less than Anakin Skywalker's was at the height of his power. And after he fell to the Dark Side and lost the duel with Obi-Wan, his M-count decreased significantly, but he was still powerful (he allowed his fear and his pain and his anger and his hatred to control his actions).

Sabine was able to wield the dark saber, and that's not an easy task. It took many frustrating hours of training with Kanan and Ezra, and she had to face her fears before she was able to connect with it.

Remember, Mando struggled with the dark saber and accidentally hurt himself pretty badly in the process. He couldn't connect with it and it's why he was not able to fight with it.

Sabine went back to Mandalore to try and reconnect with her family, to get them to join the Rebellion.

After Gar Saxon got hold of the dark saber, Sabine took him on (a man more than twice her age) with Ezra's lightsaber, and she defeated him.

At that moment, instead of choosing the Mandalorian way and killing him, she chose to follow the way of the Jedi and allowed him to live (be taken prisoner). Not surprisingly, he tried to shoot her instead of submitting but took a blaster shot to the heart from Sabine's mother for his troubles.

But this is the moment her family chose to follow her into battle to free her father from Imperial prison.

Sabine wasn't interested in ruling over Mandalore, and it's why she gave the dark saber to Bo-Katan in the end while she chose to return with the rebels to continue fighting against the Empire.

And when Ezra chose to surrender to the Empire on Lothal, he left his lightsaber with Chopper who gave it to Sabine the moment that Lothal was free. He left it behind for her to use because she already knew how to fight with it.

She fought alongside Ezra, Kanan and Ahsoka during the Rebellion.

Hera even told her she was starting to sound like a Jedi at one point.

It doesn't matter that she's not naturally attuned to the Force the way the other Jedi are. George Lucas has said that anyone can be a Jedi because the Force resides in all living things. Obi-Wan Kenobi has been telling us this since 1977 when A New Hope came out.

Kanan emphasized this when he was training Sabine with the dark saber.

Sabine comes from a culture of highly skilled warriors who are the ancient enemy of the Jedi, but if one Mandalorian was able to find balance between his Mandalorian ways and the ways of the Jedi, then why can't Sabine?

Yes, it's a challenge for her, but she doesn't let it stop her from trying anyway. We should be cheering on the fact that she was finally able to use it instead of being annoyed that she was able to do it in the final episode of Ahsoka. We saw a fraction of her training and it wasn't like Ahsoka hadn't been working on training her years before that.

And now that Ahsoka has been able to face her own fears, she is finally able to be the master that Sabine needs.

Sabine is now stranded on a planet where the Mortis gods are carved into the mountainsides, in a different galaxy with Huyang and Ahsoka, the one who carries the life force of the Daughter inside of her.

Sabine cracked the code on the painting in the Jedi Temple on Lothal that allowed Ezra to open the portal to the World Between Worlds.

Maybe it's just me, but I think Star Wars Rebels was hinting at her following the path of the Jedi all along.

[o-wise-corvid]

Maul takes statements a little too literally because Sidious had a habit of making “offhand” ones that turned out to be extremely literal. Like “it will only be a little skin off your back” would mean carving a piece of flesh off Maul’s back while being told if he moved or made a sound, they’d start again on a completely new area until he could “complete the mission”.

You don’t come out of being raised like that for as long as you can remember and be a regular person mentally. If he didn’t take it all at face value, he’d never have survived. If he didn’t follow instructions to the letter, there would be pain worse than what he was already in.

In canon, and AU’s that include this, most healthy moment he ever had was realizing that it wasn’t that he was unworthy of Sidious’ approval, but that Sidious was unworthy of his adoration. In canon, he decided to make it Sidious’ problem however he possibly could. Killing Anakin was his best shot. And he got Ahsoka instead.

Kenobi was just an outlet for all the pain and hurt and jealousy that all this breeds inside a person’s soul. Kenobi was why he failed right? Right?! He had to be. And when Maul discovered Kenobi had someone that loved him, truly loved him… they had to be dealt with. And that’s why Satine had to die. How could he let the man who’d taken everything from him have the thing that Maul so desperately CRAVES? Simply put, Maul couldn’t.

Maul’s full, ultimately, of love. But he’s been beaten and twisted and broken so many times that when it comes to showing it, it’s also broken. “I was told to do this by a person I love and if I love them, I do it to the letter, because if I don’t, I must not love them so maybe they’ll love me if I do it perfectly.” All he wants in the end, is someone to please love him back. But he doesn’t believe he deserves it. Because no one ever has. Which in turn leads to “If I don’t show how much I hurt, it isn’t real but I deserve it all anyway, so who cares?”

So when I write for a Maul who’s endured Sidious and come out the other side, whether in an AU where he gave up being a Sith or Sidious was killed, you get a very tired, very lonely man. He’s free of some things, having possibly realized that Kenobi was just a scared kid who’d watched his father-figure die and who else wouldn’t have gone after Maul after seeing that? It was all Sidious. He might meet someone he likes. A partner or perhaps a younger person he realizes he has paternal instincts toward. But then, he comes to love them. And one day they tell him to just GO AWAY. LEAVE ME ALONE. They mean it for an hour or so. A couple days max.

But Maul doesn’t understand that. It’s not their fault. And it’s not his either. So when they realize Maul’s not even in the same building, but is in fact waiting at the nearest spaceport with the cheapest shuttle across the galaxy in mind, it’s liable to make them panic. Because chances are, they don’t even remember what they said to him. If he ends up failing either in this or some other regard, brought back because of whatever reason, it frequently leads to quiet self harm because he failed and failure means punishment.

It doesn’t matter whoever he’s with all but begs him to not do this, not leave them. Maul doesn’t believe it. Even if he agrees just to get whoever it is to calm down. Because it feels so good. To be wanted. To be clung to. If it’s true, it’s going to have to hurt. Things that feel this good… they simply don’t happen to Maul. So they’re obviously lies.

This mental cycle is breakable. But it’s going to take a long time and a whole lot of effort. Which is why Maul isn’t easy to love or for just anyone to attempt to try to. He’s damaged. Horribly. And you’re going to get hurt trying to heal that. One should accept that not all of it will be healed. One should accept that he’s going to misunderstand. And if someone really does love him? They’re going to have to try anyway.

[marvelstars]

Lord Vader´s motives

I believe given the lack of information about Vader´s motives after the foundation of the Empire, it gets lost in translation what were his motives while he was the Empire´s enforecer given this happened right after he realized Palpatine lied to him, groomed him for years but also keep him alive after Mustafar using his own life force and he lost everybody he loved but there are some novels like Revenge and Lords of the Sith that tackle Vader´s perspective and how it differs from Anakin´s.

In "Lords of the Sith" novel in which Palpatine officially starts training Vader in the darkside, he asks him if he was a traitor to Padme and Obi-Wan and Vader answers YES, because that was the truth even if it cut at him but he knew that was the Emperor´s intention. To use the darkside you must often focus on your negative emotions, in Vaders case pain and suffering were the mains emotions keeping him conntected to it,not just physical but also emotional and psycological pain.

Vader didn´t have the illusion of believing Padme would have followed him and if he did Palpatine didn´t allow him to believe it as part of keeping him chained to the darkside, he had to keep him hopeless, so Vader focused all of his attention on ruling the Empire and finding some meaning in his turn to the darkside that way. But it wasn´t anger or hate the emotions keeping him there, it was pain and suffering.

I have always found this interesting about his character, because his own perspective on "Putting Order in the galaxy" very much reflects Anakin´s skywalker frustrated wish to "free all the slaves" just that his perspective, like his mind, were twisted at the time, so while Vader was aware he didn´t bring freedom, Order became his main motivation.

I don´t support the idea that he thought much about Obi-Wan or Ahsoka during his early years as Vader, if ObiWan´s memory was painful to think about, from Anakin´s betrayal to Obi-Wan leaving him to die, Ahsoka´s memory made Vader change his thoughts quite quickly and he could barely think about Padme without regret. Focusing on the Empire and trying to bring whatever order he thought could be beneficial, that was the focus on his life from that day on until he discovered the existence of his Son, which gave him some hope to have a family again, if not to leave the darkside.

I believe, following the OT, Vader wasn´t in denial about being Anakin skywalker, he just believed everything that make Anakin Skywalker, the person he used to be, died right along his loved ones, Anakin skywalker existed but whatever value Anakin originally had in that name had lost it´s meaning "That name no longer means anything to me", spiritual death, there was no escaping the darkside but he still could do something with what he had left.