#What to see in Old Delhi

[queenoftreasures]

My Delhi Dairy

The roots of Delhi go deep into the Mahabharata era. Modern history says Delhi is an amalgam of seven cities but some historians say Delhi could be made up of 15 cities. Now, with the satellite towns–Noida, Gurugram, Faridabad, Ghaziabad–in its ambit as National Capital Region, it’s a megalopolis. Delhi has always been the seat of power and dynasties have fought over the crown here. The ancient…

[hellotailor]

armand’s costumes are such an interesting data point re: his nebulous sense of identity.

when analyzing any costume, there are always many factors to consider: the setting, the character’s personal taste and economic constraints, storytelling concerns like tone and genre, etc. with armand, we also need to remember that he’s 500 years old and violently disconnected from his human origins. everything he wears has an element of disguise, selected to blend into a new environment.

armand was enslaved as a child in 16th century delhi, and barely remembers his mortal life. unlike louis - who can return to new orleans after 80 years and reconnect with his past - armand has no home to return to. his whole backstory, even his name, is rife with traumatic subtext, leaving him with an obsessive need for structure and control. this adds an extra layer of meaning to costuming choices that initially seem like straightforward menswear. 

armand’s 1940s wardrobe is very put-together - primarily three-piece suits and coats that make him look wealthier and more formal than louis, who is purposefully dressing down. most of these outfits are tailored to bulk up armand's frame, leaning into the "maitre" persona. and like his business-casual dubai wardrobe, he always leaves his collar open. when i interviewed costume designer carol cutshall, she described this as a symbolic power move, signalling that he's an apex predator who doesn't need to protect his throat.

my personal interpretation is that while armand clearly likes to look good, he has a complicated relationship with attractiveness. he doesn't always want to draw attention. his color palette is shadowy (black, grey, brown, olive green), and he’s much less flashy than the other Théâtre vamps. however when he’s feeling confident and flirty, he becomes more of a power-dresser - for instance his hunting outfit with the big coat and sunglasses, or his habit of wearing kohl.

interestingly, most of armand's 1940s costumes set him apart from the coven. the Théâtre vampires dress like cabaret performers, embracing a lot of period-specific styles. by contrast armand is more timeless and neutral. in fact, due to the relatively minor changes in men's suits over the past 100 years, there's a lot of overlap between his wardrobe in the 1940s, '70s and 2020s:

the rest of the Théâtre squad share an unofficial uniform of boldly clashing monochrome patterns with pops of bright color. meanwhile armand has a very plain wardrobe, emphasizing the image of him as a businesslike authority figure surrounded by zany artistes. he only wears subtle stripes on a few occasions in the '40s, reflecting the recurring prison motif we see in lestat's trial suit and (most famously) the dubai penthouse bedroom:

if we ask the question, "what does this person like to wear?" there are easy answers for lestat, louis and claudia. we understand their tastes, and the motives behind them. but armand is more enigmatic. we can recognize through-lines in his wardrobe, but his "taste" is dominated by whatever role he's currently decided to embody, whether that's a parisian theater director or a real estate mogul in dubai.

the times when he appears to have the most fun with clothing are when he steals a pair of sunglasses from his human dinner (!) and when he's pretending to be rashid. in other words, when he's explicitly performing for an audience. "real armand" is still a mystery.

(i may write more about armand's dubai wardrobe later, but for now, you can find all of my iwtv costumes posts on this tag!)

[rose-maidenn]

⋆✿˖°Pick a Pile : What do People dream of you ⋆✿˖

Hey guys here in this reading I dive into various kinds of dreams people have about you some can be very clear and other can be eerie , select any Pile using your intuition and all of it might not reasonate as it is a collective reading

Masterlist | old masterlist

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Pile 1 :

Symbolisms and confirmers: (not all of them have to resonate if anyone does go ahead and read).

Manhattan, 444 , deli , delhi, psychedelic rock , chappal roan , Manu, sweet 16 , Anna karenina , Malcom and Marie, Mr and Mrs Smith, sweet blond jesus , sundays , 1970s , breakfast , clear cut diamonds , heist , monetairy affair, mole on the left side of cheek , glittery dress , you're wearing pink or yellow or black as you read , you have birthday on 5,21,8,5,12 of the month , you're born on Wednesday.

The first dream about you is dreamt by a young girl or a female friend you admire a lot , it's about shopping and spending time together in a cafe and having doughnuts and chatting about how so many changes have befall you yet how close the both of you feel to each other . I see the symbolism of the fan maybe this conversation is carried out as you guys look at the ceiling .

The next dream about you is dreamt by your mother about you being successful, maybe in a business industry or the singing industry , you might be an alto , I see peonies being represented (wealth and prosperity) , she also might have received a task to do to ensure that something involving writing a small chit and placing it somewhere maybe in the altar, money bowl etc .

The third dream I tap in is dreamt by an online friend , blond or red hairs , they dream of you in a garden harvesting fruit with them I see a lot of red around, this could be sunset time or the colour of the realm is red . I see that they relate to you a lot and want to spend time with you . They keep you in their prayers a lot and hence they dream of you so vividly.

Pile 2 :

Symbolisms and confirmers: (not all of them have to resonate if anyone does go ahead and read):

Cobra Kai , 555, Birth of venus , a purple car , crown , eatery , devilish sweet , idiocracy , self made star , faraway land , willow , apples , yule ball , Saraswati, Athena, yellow , Azul, attar , dogs , bed bugs, blond hair , Birth mark on bosum or scalp , you're burning a candle as you read , you're wearing white , blue or green as you read . Born on 31 , 3 , 7 , 6 , 17 of the month . Born on Tuesday or Friday

The first dream about you is dreamt about you is a weird competitive and erotic dream , it's dreamt by a colleague who has been dreaming to overthrow you , they're so obsessed with you it has turned psychosexual , I'm not getting into details but you might need to do a cord cutting , I feel you're also experiencing dreams about them , honey go ahead and cleanse yourself.

The next dream about you is from an admirer I see them taking you on a helicopter or a private jet to an island and talking with you all day long , they play with your hairs make you food mainly pasta and give you a head massage. They get continuous dreams about you , in other dates they visit museums and sit by rivers talking to you about classics , their childhood and your wishes and wants , sweet so sweet .

The third dream about you is dreamt by a teacher or a guru or a superior, it's related to your academic or spiritual journey , you're on your way to unlock new horizons and the teacher is being asked to prepare themselves to guide you properly . They also see that you place them in your success story and make them famous much like they becoming famous because their student made it big in life .

Pile 3 :

Symbolisms and confirmers: (not all of them have to resonate if anyone does go ahead and read):

Sylvia plath , danger , conceit , burrow , red alert , sapphires, skin , the substance , weaving , crocheting , barbie in the 12 dancing princesses , Trans, bi , blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb , lack of communication, berries , rainbows , horses, manifesting generator , wedding bells , piercings and snake or quote tattoos , you're wearing pyjamas as you read . You're wearing red , sheer , beige , pink as you read . You are Born on 1, 18 , 19 , 25 , 13 , you are Born on Thursday, Monday .

The very first dream is by a friend you are cut off from or just fell apart from , they're dreaming of you near a fountain or a water body giving them advice or consoling them about something this person is having a bad time actually they sleep really less , maybe you should talk if they aren't bad or toxic . They also dream of you both being In a concert maybe guns and roses

The next dream is by someone who is actively manifesting you , it's crazy and eerie , they don't see your face , could be a soul mate or someone from your soul tribe, they see you spending their time with them and talking about various subjects , also going on a travelling journey also see some arguments and casino is also seen . Guys it's 1:11 am hehe a confirmation

The third dream is an absolute action packed banger of a dream could call it a batman coded superhero dream , it is being dreamt by a past admirer or a childhood friend who still likes you, you're being upheld by a monster who keeps eating your skin and then he /she comes along and protects you and heals you through some dna regeneration technology and then yall kiss and call it a night.

Thanks for reading hope it helped 🌸✨️

[metamatar]

soo curious what made you say armand's story wasn't 'well done' cuz i havent seen many ppl criticize the way they handled his race/backstory/etc

i mean his being indian is mostly just window dressing till s2. he is violently trafficked and abused, so he has no memory of india but "arun" (plausibly hindu name), new delhi, and a time period. he's a great character tbc, just that his race is very generically done.

the one obvious site for commentary – where he pretends to be his own muslim servant is mostly cast on the show in the context of his history of prostitution. the poolboy in the vampire mansion. when daniel sees through the performance, it supposedly because he's not sure he's performing "dubai" native correctly... but! when it comes dubai in specific, it actually enslaves south asians in large numbers through the kafala system. it also has a large number of south asian expats. the show is really only interested in armand as rashid in terms of what it means for his relationship with louis. so far? i guess there's stuff to be mined about how south asian men are demasculinised and considered weak and armand was young and dying when he was turned, forever immortalised as fragile. mostly though iwtv only uses armand's race as it likely marginalizes him in a very generic sort of it got him trafficked and he got whitewashed sort of way. there's none of the verisimilitude we get with louis being southern creole usamerican, lestat being french, santiago's british theatre pretensions and so on.

the show has like, watsonian reasons to be lazy – its not armand's season, he seeks to control and manipulate people with what he reveals, he's avoidant, etc etc. its inoffensive, but its not interesting. it feels like an oversight on a show obsessed with the clash of the old world and the new in lestat and louis, the dynamics of race and class and gender.

[the-owl-tree]

Deer's Xenofiction List - The Good, the Bad, and the Furry

Compilation of my xenofiction books I've read, my opinions on them, and ones that I've yet to get to. Will be updated as I go along, if I remember. Books I have not read have an asterisk (*) in front of them. Not a complete list, I will update as I gather more titles.

Adaptations will be listed along with the source material and not as a separate entry.

While I am accepting additions to the list, please make sure your suggestion isn't already listed.

Last Updated: 24-06-2024

-New additions to the books section

-Categories and sub-categories being considered: short films, animal transformation (human to animal).

-Content Warning: Mentions of sexual assault, animal abuse, animal death, and violence. Only a handful of entries have content warnings because they were given to me prior. Please look into the works beforehand to see if you feel comfortable engaging with them, this list is not a content warning guide.

Books

Warriors by Erin Hunter - A long-running series following the drama of four groups of feral cat groups in a forest.

Rating: sucks just read the first arc and nothing else. unless you have childhood nostalgia for this series you probably won't like anything that comes after.

Seekers by Erin Hunter - another animal series from the erin hunter team. It follows a group of bears searching for a safe place to live.

Rating: It's fine. I only read the first arc. While it has a much drearier tone than Warriors at times as it deals with growing environmental impact of global warming and human interference. If you like Erin Hunter's writing style, you might like this one.

*Survivors by Erin Hunter - Look we just gotta get these out of the way, these guys have a monopoly on kid's animal books. Survivors follows a dog named Lucky (yes. really) trying to survive in an area abandoned by humans.

Rating: I read the first book and nothing else. I'm sure it's...fine, suitable for a dog-obsessed young reader but as it is, no one's really rushed to recommend it to me. I'm sure it has fans somewhere, but I can't really speak for them.

*Bravelands by Erin Hunter - uuuhhh animals? in Africa? Surviving? I guess? Sorry my bias against Hunter is showing, but at some point you start to wonder what's going on here, you can feel them trying to recreate the success of Warriors.

Rating: idk what to tell you, never read it and probably never will. If you're a person who likes lion stories, you might enjoy this, maybe? Been told the hyena rep is appalling, another sad day for hyena lovers everywhere.

*Bamboo Kingdom by (you guessed it) Erin Hunter - It follows three pandas (apparently) each in different panda kingdoms.

Rating: I couldn't tell you shit about this one to be honest. You want more bears? Here's bears!

The Bees by Laline Paull - A novel following the life of Flora, a sanitation bee in her hive who rises through the ranks of her devout society.

Rating: Unfocused at times and a rushed ending, but a gripping story nonetheless. Would recommend!

Pod by Laline Paull - Follows the life of Eira, a spinner dolphin from an "exotic tribe" who is forcibly taken into another group of dolphin's to become a member of their leaders harem.

Rating: This book relies on the mythos of "dolphin rape" with numerous, non-graphic sexual assault scenes. While interesting concepts are introduced and, at times, the plot becomes compelling; it otherwise flounders its premise with messy execution and poorly thought out ideas. Also there's an American spy dolphin named Google, make of that what you will.

*The Wildlings and its sequel The Hundred Names of Darkness by Nilanjana Roy - A book about a small band of cats lives in the labyrinthine alleys and ruins of Nizamuddin, an old neighbourhood in Delhi.

Rating: Recommended multiple times to me by different people, no warnings given.

Varjak Paw (and sequels) by S. F. Said and illustrated by Dave Mckean - A short book about Varjak, a Mesopotamian Blue Cat, and his journey to learn an ancient art from his family’s past.

Rating: Varjak Paw is unique with striking imagery and interesting ideas. However, the writing in itself is far from anything special. The book it at its best when accompanied by Mckean’s striking visuals.

*The Underneath by Kathi Appelt - An abused dog hides under the porch of a home to escape from its owner. Based on a reply I've been given, do not ask me to expand anymore on the plot of this book, I have no goddamn clue.

Rating: Described as a formative book for reading xenofiction, it’s been recommended highly! Contains heavy topics such as animal abuse, be warned.

*Fire Bringer by David Clement-Davies - A novel following a red deer named Rannoch and a prophecy that looms over him.

Rating: It seems to have a decent fanbase and it's been recommended to me a handful of times.

*Bambi, a Life in the Woods by Felix Salten - A coming-of-age novel following a roe deer named Bambi. Best known from the 1942 Disney film.

Rating: If you're a deerhead, check it out I guess!

*Raptor Red by Robert T. Bakker - Often (favorably) compared to a textbook, Raptor Red follows a female Utahraptor. Written by a paleontologist, it's meant to be a realistic look at dinosaur's social habits and their interactions with their world.

Rating: Yet to read but sounds cool as fuck. This book contains a heavy emphasis on realism and world-building, with little dialogue. It may be slow for some readers!

Black Beauty by Anna Sewell - Horse girls, certain English classes, and so on, Black Beauty is fairly well-known. Though for those unaware, Black Beauty follows the titular Black Beauty's life in Victorian days.

Rating: It's a classic! Pulls at your heart strings! Just typing this out makes me want to reread it.

Watership Down by Richard Adams - Similar to Black Beauty, I can't imagine anyone reading this list doesn't know about the tale of a group of rabbit's trying to survive a harsh world.

Rating: It's well-written with a lively world, but its treatment of its female cast reveals a deep gendered bias in the writing.

*Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH by Robert. C. O'Brien - Mostly known from the (excellent) Don Bluth adaptation, the book follows Mrs. Frisby and he encounter with a group of highly intelligent rats.

Rating: Yet to read.

*Redwall by Brian Jacques - A 22 book series following a group of anthrophormic animals who live in Redwall Abbey and their call to action to defend themselves from "vermin".

Rating: Yet to read

Guardians of Ga'Hoole by Kathryn Lasky - A 31 book series following a group of owls and their attempts to thwart evil. The first arc follows Soren and his attempts to find the owls of Ga'Hoole and beat the 'Pure Ones' while the later books act as an epilogue and prequel.

Rating: First half read and loved! Highly recommend! Handling of Kludd is...meh.

Note: It has an animated film adaptation! While not entirely faithful, it still does a great job keeping to the themes of the books, trimming the fat, and telling a complete story. It also has two video games, one on DS and one on ah other consoles? Both are fun, I like the Wii version.

*(sorta?) Wings of Fire by Tui T. Sutherland - Most people reading this will know this one! It takes place in a world of dragons with seven tribes. The first arc follows the exploits of prophecized dragonets and their attempts to end a war.

Rating: I've yet to finish it. The writing is skewed for a younger audience but is charming nonetheless.

Note: It has a graphic novel adaptation illustrated by Mike Holmes.

*Duncton Wood (First book of the Duncton Chronicles) by William Horwood - A novel the three groups of moles in Duncton Woods and the tyranny of a powerful mole named Mandrake.

Rating: Not yet read, heard good things! lots of mole sex apparently.

The Plague Dogs by Richard Adams - After escaping an animal research facility, Snitter and Rowf escape out into the wild where they must survive a hostile world.

Rating: ough. my heart. would recommend.

Note: Well-known for its animated adaptation, would recommend it as well.

*Silverwing by Kenneth Oppel - The first in the Silverwing book series, Silverwing follows a bat named Shade who loses his colony during a migration to the south.

Rating: Yet to read but I've heard good things!

Note: Currently has an animated television adaptation, go check it out!

*A Black Fox Running by Brian Carter - The story follows the tale of a dark-furred fox named Wulfgar and his human nemesis, Scoble the trapper, over the course of time.

Rating: Yet to read.

*The Books of the Named/Ratha’s Creature (First book of the Ratha’s Creature series) by Clare’s Bell - Ratha’s Creature is set in prehistoric times following the story of Ratha, a Dinaelurus nimravid(?) and her role as a female in her Clan.

Yet to read, often recommended in the Xenofiction scene.

*The Taken (Book one of the Foxcraft trilogy) by Inbali Inserles - Follows the story of Isla, a fox kit who loses her home and family and must survive in the world of “furless” while mastering Foxcraft.

Recommended by @girlashfur

*Hurry Home, Candy by Meindert DeJong and illustrations by Maurice Sendak - Described as "heavy", Hurry Home, Candy follows the life and struggles of a dog named Candy.

Recommended by @mosshugs

Felidae (the first book in a nine book series) by Akif Pirinçci - A crime novel following Francis the cat as he tries to uncover the truth behind a series of murders in his new neighborhood.

Rating: I haven't read the novel and nor do I want to, but I did watch the adaptation. It's a grisly one but apart from the violent murders and striking imagery in the film, you're not missing much by skipping it. I can't really recommend this one for a variety of reasons.

Important: I can't stop you from reading the book or watching the animated adaptation, I watched the animated adaptation, but please do not financially support the author in any way. Pirinçci is a far-right dipshit and does not deserve support.

The Animals of Farthing Wood by Colin Dann - With eight books under its belt, The Animals of Farthing Wood originally started as one book about a group of woodland animals trying to find a new home after losing their old one to human development. It was followed by six sequels and one prequel.

Rating: Haven't read the books but I love the animated adaptation of it! I recommend checking out both.

*Ragweed (First book of the Dimwood book series) by Avi - A book about the adventures of a mouse seeing the world.

Recommended by @meanling

*A Dog's Life: An Autobiography of a Stray by Ann M. Martin - Written by the same author of the Babysitter's Club series, A Dog's Life chronicles the life of a dog named Squirrel.

Recommended by @meanling

*Scary Stories for Young Foxes by Christian McKay Heidicker and illustrations by Junyi Wu - Scary Stories for Young Foxes is a book consisting of several stories all told by a mother to her kits.

Recommended anonymously

*The Sight (and its sequel The Fell) by David Clement-Davies - Set in the same universe as Fire Bringer, The Sight follows a pack of wolves cursed by a lone wolf, Morgra, whose powers foretell the destiny of one of the mother wolf's pups: Larka, a white wolf gifted with a mysterious power known as The Sight.

Not yet read.

*Last of the Curlews by Fred Bodsworth - A realistic depiction of the journey of the last of a critically endangered and soon to be extinct bird.

Not yet read.

Note: Has an animated adaptation!

*Wish Tree by Katherine Applegate - From the same author as The One and Only Ivan! While this story includes animals, it's main character is an old oak tree named Red! The perspective is really interesting. She is both the neighborhood wish tree, and a home for many animals. A family of Muslim refugees move into the neighborhood, with the kid, Samar, becoming attached to the tree.

Not yet read.

*Pax by Sara Pennypacker - A war approaches and Peter must release his pet fox when his father enlists. The story alternates between Peter as he starts a journey to find his pet, and Pax who is learning to survive in the wild.

Not yet read.

*A Wolf Called Wander by Rosanne Perry - Inspired by the wolf 0R-7 (Journey), we follow Swift. After a rival wolf pack attacks, Swift's family scatters and must find a new home, taking an 1000 mile journey across the Pacific Northwest.

Not yet read.

*The Tygrine Cat by Inbali Iserles - Alone and lost, a young cat called Mati is struggling to be accepted by a colony of street cats in the bustling marketplace at Cressida Lock. What Mati doesn’t know is that he is the last of a vital, age-old breed and that a mysterious feline assassin named Mithos is close on his trail. With his enemy nearing, can Mati learn to harness his ancient powers — before a deadly feline force destroys both him and his newfound friends and takes the spirit of every cat on earth?

Not yet read.

Fifteen Dogs by André Alexis - The ancient Greek Gods make a bet and endow fifteen dogs from a shelter with human-level intelligence.

Rating: I can't say I loved this book but nonetheless I appreciated it's prose. If you can get past outdated pack dynamics and some...questionable writing around its female characters, there's a lot to appreciate. Mind you, this is a book for adults and does not shy away from sexual material.

Comics (Webcomics included)

Beasts of Burden written by Evan Dorkin and illustrated by Benjamin Dewey and Jill Thompson - The comics follow along the adventures of the ‘Beasts of Burden’ a group of animals who investigate paranormal happenings in their neighborhood.

Rating: With gorgeous art and an interesting world, I recommend! Just be warned, it is bloody and the sory doesn't hold your hand.

Note: Beasts of Burden currently has 21 comics published in Dark Horse Comics.

What Lurks Beneath by ArualMeow - A feral colony must grapple with a food shortage while simultaneously tussling with the divide between two groups of cats.

Rating - A highly compelling read. Each character plays a role in the unravelling drama of three siblings and you will walk away loving someone.

Note: Ongoing!

I Hope So by Detective Calico - A rewrite of My Pride turned into an original story, I Hope So follows the story of three lionesses navigating both the complicated politics of the lion prides but also the harsh environment they must survive in.

Rating: Slow to update but absolutely worth it! I Hope So is a charming and interesting read. It’s yet to finish but it’s far enough that you'll be able to invest yourself in the world and characters with no trouble!

Note: Ongoing!

Tofauti Sawa by TheCynicalHound - A revenge story that follows a spotted hyena named Sahara.

Rating: Tofauti Sawa is not here to endear you to its protagonists or hold your hand. It can be a tough read but a worthwhile one nonetheless. I need to catch up but I recommend it!

Note: Ongoing!

*Golden Shrike by Doeprince - A story about twin deer and their friends and their search to retrieve three fallen stars for a bored God.

Rating: Yet to read but I've heard good things!

Note: Ongoing!

*Doe of Deadwood by Songdog - It follows a deer who has a pact with a demon that takes the form of a tree. It has some heavy themes and light gore.

Recommended by @beeloaf

Note: Complete!

Jet and Harley by Doeprince - Described as a beautiful piece on grief and moving on, Jet and Harley stars a kitty cast and gorgeous artwork.

Rating: Recommended anonymously. It's still starting but it has some strong set up and charming writing going for it, I recommend keeping an eye on it!

Note: Ongoing!

Preeny Has to Repeat 6th Grade by momodriller - A love letter to adoptables and the creativity of young artists, this charming comic utilizes designs bought from adoptables on DeviantArt! It follows the story of Preeny, a young cat with a magic brush tail and what happens when her whole world turns upside down.

Rating: Beyond adorable, charming and sweet. There's a lot of love put into this webcomic and it shows! Highly recommend.

Note: Ongoing!

Africa by Arven92 - The story of a female leopard named Africa and her quest to protect her family and loved ones while her territory comes under threat.

Rating: Gorgeously drawn and with a story that twists, Africa pulls no punches in showing you the wickedness of its antagonists but also the enduring bond of a family.

Note: Ongoing!

*Oren's Forge by Teagan Gavet - A webcomic that explores the dynamics of predator and prey and what happens when those divisions fall in the story of a pair of pine martens and their journey for sanctuary.

Rating: Not yet read

Note: Ongoing!

*Pride of Baghdad written by Brian K. Vaughan and Niko Henrichon - A graphic novel falling the fictionalized account of the real life escape of four lions from the Baghdad Zoo after an American bombing in 2003.

Rating: Not yet read.

Content warning for graphic violence, gore, animal death, and a brief one panel depiction of sexual assault.

*I Didn't Know by Songdog - A comic about a cat exiled from her Church.

Rating: Not yet read.

Note: Ongoing

*Fox Fires by Pipilia - This ongoing Webtoon follows a Tanuki named Raate as she goes on a journey to find the missing "Fox Fires", a gate between the land of the dead and living. She encounters many friends such as birds who are messangers for elves, magic cats, and normal mean wolves.

Not yet read.

Note: Ongoing

Manga & Anime

*Silver Fang Gin and Ginga Densetsu Weed written and illustrated by Yoshihiro Takahashi - The original and the sequel respectively, the manga series follow Akita dogs, Gin and Weed. While Silver Fang focuses on Gin's search to fight the monstrous "Red Helmet", Weed follows the titular Weed and his search for his father.

Rating: I've not read this but upon getting recommended it, multiple people warned me about the misogyny in the series. Ye be warned. Additionally, the manga is (apparently) very gory!

Note: Both have anime adaptations. Weed's opening is a fucking banger go watch it at the very least.

Beastars (and Beast Complex by extension) written and illustrated by Paru Itagaki - In a world of anthromorphic animals, Beastars follows Legosi, a young wolf navigating his complicated feelings towards other species and learning more about his world.

Rating: Beastars is action-packed, fun, emotional, and dramatic! The first half is a compelling story of identity and how we interact with one another and the complex forces of society that drive our feelings, all wrapped up in a wonderous animal metaphor. As a coming-of-age story, it carries themes of desire, sexual desire, yearning, shame, and more. The second half is eeeeehhh not as strong, but I still recommend it nonetheless!

Note: Beastars currently has an anime adaptation by Studio Orange! It looks fantastic and has some really nice quality of life changes. Highly recommend.

Chi's Sweet Home written and illustrated by Konami Kanata - An adorable slice-of-life story following a cute kitten named Chi adapting to her new home.

Rating: It's just plain cute! If you're looking for something adorable to help you relax, I recommend this one. It's for a younger age demographic so don't go in expecting deep storylines or anything.

Note: Chi's Sweet Home has two adaptations: one with traditional 2D Japanese animation and two seasons and a 2016 3DCGI adaptation. I'd recommend the original adaptation but that's pure preference.

Nyankees written and illustrated by Atsushi Okada - A comedy manga that depicts street cats as brawling "yankees", drawing them as both cat and human to depict their brawls over food, territory, and ladies!

Rating: It's funny, I can't deny the humor in this one makes me chuckle. It's a little racy but otherwise, a fun, light-hearted read.

*A Cat's Tale written by Sae-Him Kwon and Hyeon-Jung Kim and illustrated by Kwon-Sam - A thrilling tale of murder and deception from the animals living on the Sae-Min's farm from the point of view of an elderly cat.

Rating: Yet to read, discovered on Anime-Planet's search system.

Monotone Blue written and illustrated by Nagabe - A story set in high school, it's a BL manga that follows Hachi the cat and Aoi the lizard.

Rating: Yet to read, but I adore the author's other works so I have high expectations!

*Neko to Ryuu written by Amara and illustrated by Sasaki Izumi- A cat raises a baby dragon as her own.

Rating: Yet to read but come on, that sounds adorable.

A Story of Seven Lives written and illustrated by Shirawaka Gin - A Story of Seven Lives follows Nanao, a former housecat turned street cat after a terrible tragedy.

Rating: It's a tearjerker and absolutely adorable. The artwork is lovely and all the cats' designs look fantastic. if you're interested in a simple drama about the relationship between cats and people, i would highly recommend it.

Note: There are human protagonists! If you want pure animal protagonists, maybe skip this one.

*The Walking Cat: A Cat's-Eye-View of the Zombie Apocalypse by Tomo Kitaoka - Zombies roam the earth and civilization as we know it is dead. When Jin—a young man trying to survive the chaos—rescues a cat from certain death, the unlikely duo sets off on a quest to find a mysterious island where Jin’s wife may be alive. Witness the zombie apocalypse through the eyes of a fearless feline whose curiosity may kill him yet.

Rating: Not yet read.

PLEASE READ: Due to its setting, this series has been given a handful of content warnings, please heed this warning before you read. Content warning for gore, death, sexual abuse, physical abuse.

Film

i'm not gonna put every disney or dreamworks film on here i'm sure a majority of us know that disney makes a lot of already popular animal films. if possible, i'd like to spotlight some films that weren't made by big studios and/or don't get a lot of attention. Further note, some of these are adaptations of children's books. I'm cheating a little here mainly because the adaptations are more well-known and probably more appealing for readers of this list than the original books. Uh, sorry.

The Brave Little Toaster directed by Jerry Rees - The film follows the adventures of sentient kitchen appliances and the search for their owner.

Rating: Aimed for a younger audience, it's an adorable viewing for all ages.

Isle of Dogs directed by Wes Anderson - In the year 2038, canine flu breaks out in a futuristic Japan and all dogs are sent to 'trash island' where they fight to survive. One day, a young Japanese boy crashes down on trash island to find his dog.

Rating: The stop-motion animation is gorgeous, the writing is fun and charming, and the visuals are amazing, however the film has rightfully garnered criticism for its stereotypical depiction of Japanese society and 'white savior' narrative around one of its human characters.

Chirin no Suzu (English Title: Ringing Bell/Chirin's Bell) directed by Masami Hata - On a farm, Chirin witnesses the death of his mother to a wolf. Distraught and filled with rage, Chirin vows to get revenge and trains to do so.

Rating: A fantastic and visually striking film, the film's cute aesthetics hide a sombre and darker story. Would recommend!

*Vuk (English Title: The Little Fox) directed by Atilla Dargay - A Hungarian animated film that follows the life of a fox and how he must use his wits to survive.

Rating: Not yet watched.

Arashi no Yoru Ni (English Title: One Stormy Night) directed by Gisaburō Sugii - On one stormy night, a sheep and a wolf take refuge from a storm in the same abandoned home and befriend each other...unaware of what species the other is until later. They strike an unusual friendship that's tested when their respective groups begin to clash.

Rating: Cute, sweet, and well-animated, One Stormy Night is well known for the romantic undertones of its two leads. I think it's adorable and highly recommend.

Note: It received another adaptation of the same source material, a 3D animated show where they made the sheep a girl. Do with that information what you will.

Leafy, A Hen into the Wild directed by Oh Sung-yoon - A farm chicken dreams of one day living a life in the wild and raising her own clutch of eggs and, after faking her death to escape, finally gets the opportunity to do so.

Rating: A gorgeous animated film with moments that will tug at your heart strings. It's got some kiddy jokes with poop and fart jokes but they're not too distracting. Would recommend!

Note: Please find a version with the ORIGINAL ending, not the censored one. It is more thematically fitting and one heck of a gut-punch.

Underdog/A Dog's Courage directed by Lee Chun-baek and Oh Sung-yoon - After being abandoned by his owners, a dog joins up with a pack of other dogs in search of 'paradise'.

Rating: Despite some poor pacing and wonky tonal problems, I think this movie is still worth checking out! The character designs are cute and it's decent entertainment if you've got some time.

Note: There's a post that says this movie is about dogs escaping to North Korea, it's not true. They escape from North Korea to South Korea.

Padak directed by Dae-Hee Lee - A dark and sometimes brutal film about a wild fish that ends up in a restaurant fish tank that overlooks the ocean. The film stays there and the audience is given a tense, nerve-wracking narrative of life and death.

Rating: A fantastic, emotional movie that uses its limited setting to its full advantage. It's brutal and unforgiving but one hundred percent worth the watch.

Khumba directed by Anthony Silverston - A film that follows a zebra with only half his stripes and his journey to gain the rest of them in hopes of being accepted by his herd.

Rating: It's fine, a little wonky but it has a lot of heart.

Earnest and Celestine directed by Stéphane Aubier, Vincent Patar and Benjamin Renner - A gorgeous 2D French animated film based on a series of children's films about a bear who takes in an orphan mouse in an anthropomorphic society that does not approve.

Rating: you're going to get cavities at how sweet this film is. Charming, funny, and visually stunning, you would be remiss if you didn't watch this wonderful film at least once.

The Land Before Time directed by Don Bluth - After tragedy strikes, young Apatosaurus must embark on a journey to find the Great Valley.

Rating: It's a classic! A bit cutesy and meanders at times, but still worth a watch.

Note: Pretty well known for the host of direct-to-DVD sequel movies it produced, a television series, and a video game.

Television (Online Productions Included)

My Pride directed by Maddi Patton - My Pride is an independent internet production that follows the tale of a disabled lion named Nothing trying to exist in her cruel society.

Rating: My Pride is clearly a work of passion, one can’t deny the creator clearly had a vision of what she wanted from this show. However, the execution is flawed and the handling of disability has been (rightfully) criticized. While the animators and voice actors have clearly put a lot of love and effort into the project, the writing falls short of what it could be.

Note: The series ends on a cliffhanger and has been discontinued. You have been warned.

My Little Pony (Generations 1-5) developed by Hasbro - If you like ponies, here you go! While G1 did have a human character, G3 to G5 are purely horsies. Each generation has a different story and main cast to follow.

Rating: Very obviously for a younger age demographic, the generations do have their own charm! G4 is popular for a reason with a sleek style, witty writing, and a lovely cast of characters.

Azurehowl and Azurehowl Reborn created by azurehowlshilach - Bet this one brings back nostalgia lol Azurehowl is set in a world where wolves have the magic of dragons! It centers around Ruuza who may be more special than she realizes.

Rating: i gotta rewatch this one to make my thoughts clear but i remember finding it charming. Azurehowl Reborn appears to be the remake/reboot of the original series.

Note: Ongoing!

Twelve by Petpyves - An original series about May and Imp, a duo who's jobs are to jump from body to body and guide them to a better end, results vary. It's a work of love and has some really strong concepts and writing, as well as doing its best to handle more mature subejcts with respect.

Rating: It's rough around the edges but nonetheless a great show to binge! I recommend it, though it's been a while since I watched it.

Note: Complete!

No Evil by Betsy Lee - In the land of myths and fables incarnate a group of spirits live their casual lives alongside humans, until a cataclysmic force thought to be dealt with shows once again in the world. A prequel series to the webcomic Brother Swan.

Rating: Not yet watched.

Note: Complete!

Burrow's End by Dimension 20 - A Dungeons & Dragons campaign following a group of stoats.

Rating: Not yet watched.

Note: Complete!

Video Games

Okami developed by Clover Studios - You play as the wolf Amaterasu on her journey to save the world from forces of darkness.

Rating: A classic for a reason. Fun to play, great story, lovely characters. Would recommend!

Stray developed by Bluetwelve Studios - In a walled city populated by robots, you play as a cat.

Rating: ending made me bawl. Gameplay is a bit clunky, the platforming is essentially hitting buttons to automatically jump to your destination instead of you jumping yourself. Otherwise, would recommend!

*Tokyo Jungle developed Crispy's! - Set in a deserted, furistic Tokyo, you can select from a wide array of animals to play as and survive.

Rating: never played but maaan do I want to.

*Spirit of the North developed by Infuse Studio- You play as an ordinary red fox whose story becomes entwined with the guardian of the Northern Lights, a female spirit fox.

Rating: Yet to play.

Untitled Goose Game developed by House House - honk

Rating: honk

*Copoka developed by Inaccurate Interactive - You play as a pigeon trying to build a nest in a totalitarian state.

Rating: Yet to play.

*Seasons After Fall developed by Swing Swing Submarine - 2D platformer where you play as a fox in a magical land.

Rating: Yet to play.

Pokemon Mystery Dungeon developed by Spike Chunsoft - A rogue-like RPG in which you take the form as a human turned Pokemon and must navigate your world. There are currently seven games to choose from, each with a unique world and story.

Rating: I love PMD, I'm putting it here because I'm biased. I love it a lot and it fits the criteria so here you go!

Cattails & *Cattails: Wildwood Story developed by Falcon Development - With the creator known for their WC fan game, Untold Tales, Cattails branched out from the bones of the fan game and became an original game of it's own! In this RPG, you play as a cat where you can hunt, fight, find love, and solve puzzles. Wildwood expands on the base mechanics, adding in farming, characters, and more!

Rating: I found the first Cattails to be cute and simple. It's not an intensive RPG, the mechanics become repetitive after a while. If you're someone who likes getting into the rhythm of a grindy rpg, you'll like this one. Not yet played Wildwood but I've heard it's great!

Rain World developed by Videocult - You play as a nomadic slugcat in a brutal world with only your wits, agility, and strength to survive. Eat, hunt, flee, and hibernate while finding out the secrets of your world.

Rating: Okay. this game is HARD. Like unfair hard. Imprecise controls, brutal difficulty, and sometimes really unfair save points - this one is tough. However, it is gorgeous and it's really fun seeing all the beautiful environments the creators came up with. Enemies are also incredibly complex, reacting to each other and you in different ways. It's an acquired taste, while it wasn't for me personally, I would recommend giving it a try at the very least.

Miscellaneous

Additions that aren't necessarily xenofiction but pertain to it in some way.

Cheek by Jowl: Animals in Children's Literature by Ursula K. Le Guin -A fantastic essay that explores the role of the animal in children's literature from its role as something to reflect human society, or how it teaches children about animals. Furthermore, it explores the ways in which xenofiction can intentionally or unintentionally reinforce human bigotry through what we deem the "natural" order of the world.

Rating: Please read if you're interested in xenofiction! A fantastic essay that kicks you off thinking critically about what xenofiction has to say. The essay has a striking section on Watership Down that I highly recommend reading.

Cardinal West (YouTube) - A YouTube channel that discusses xenofiction. Videos that I recommend to start with are:

How (Not) to Write Xenofiction: A Literary Autopsy of “One for Sorrow, Two for Joy” by Clive Woodall (CW for discussions of sexual assault)

How Adapting The Fox and the Hound Changed Animation

[indizombie]

Social activist Ramendra Kumar who is general secretary of the Delhi Shramik Sangathan, a federation of unorganised workers, says gig workers are slightly better treated than domestic workers because, while they may be excluded from public spaces, they do not have to enter homes and this spares them the worst humiliations. “What older Indians do immediately on meeting a maid, cook or cleaner is to ask their name. That tells them instantly both their caste and religion so that Hindus can then exclude certain people, from, say, working in the kitchen because of caste purity” Kumar said. “India is the most stratified and divided society in the world and even new areas of the economy, such as gig workers, are not exempt from the old attitudes that affect traditional workers like maids and cooks which divide us Indians. These people want gig workers to deliver what they want but don’t want to see them or hear them.”

Amrit Dhillon, ‘Delivering discrimination? India’s gig workers see access denied by class divide’, South China Morning Post

[hopelittledreamer]

I couldn't sleep. What the hell is going on in this country???? Have y'all been keeping tabs on the violences going on in sambhal? And the surveys going on one after another on mosques? I seriously can't believe how tf are people so stupid. There are countless mosques and shrines which were built on demolished temples. If you go on trying to restore each and every temple back, then this country would go down to hell. Does the government has no other fucking issue than screwing up the already paper thin communal harmony in India? People are freaking dying in Delhi because of the air pollution, rape is as common as robbery, the environment is deteriorating at a fast pace, the economy of the country is in shambles, people are now poorer than ever, more than 90% of the country earns less than 25k rupees per month, the ganga is dying, so many animal species native to our country are on the verge of extinction, we don't have any good relation with any of our neighbouring country, unemployment rates are skyrocketing, the taxes are eating away at the middle class, only 1% of the population holds the majority wealth of the country, Mumbai has become the city with the most billionaires in all of South Asia with 92 billionaires residing there yet the biggest slum of asia exists alongside these elites . All of these issues. And what does the fucking divisive government wants to focus on???? Surveying centuries old mosques and wanting to see whether there's any temple ruins beneath it. And they don't even want to do this for their dharma. Naah, they don't give a fuck about hindus. They only want to keep the attention on these matters while the rich keep on profiting. Wow, like just wow. Use your fucking brains. The rich won't hesitate to kill the poor, doesn't matter if it's a Hindu or a muslim or a person of any religion. God, I can't believe the state of this country.

[creatingnikki]

Dear you at the start of 2024,

Hello, I'm here with insights and tea. You will have a lot of main character moments this year. Flying all the way to another city to meet a man you met online because you're this bold and hopeful woman who loves love and can actually take care of yourself even if things don't work out. Don't ever regret being that woman — the courage to believe in love despite all the prior bad experience, despite all the trauma and baggage you still haven't been able to clean your way out of, despite the shitty people out there — you are a sparky, smart, sweet person with so much capacity for love. Don't let people who break your heart shame you into hating you for your strengths and for taking a leap of faith.

Also, remember, sometimes people only break your expectations, not your heart. Love...it is something so vague and intangible and different for all. But for you? It's showing up. It's prioritizing the person's needs and emotions, being in sync with their thoughts and caring. Endless caring. So, if you take a minute and think about it, that boy you travelled over 500 miles for never loved you and baby you didn't quite love him either. You were on the path, both of you, yes. But neither got very far and it's frustrating and it sucks. But don't let yourself marinate in the misery of broken expectations for too long.

You will also make out with this really tall and hot guy in the middle of the dance floor at the club with everyone stopping and staring and you won't care because in those few minutes of drunk ecstasy everything will quiet down and it will feel like it's just you and him and all that sexual chemistry in between.

You will spend yet another week in the Summer in Delhi with your best friend and you will drink soju and eat tteokbokki and you will read many interesting lit fic books — this time from some v cool Indian authors too.

The space you were so restless for, you will be blessed with. And then you won't know what to do with it or yourself. You will keep feeling broken thinking that void, that God-shaped hole inside of you, is way too big and you will feel depressed and beyond repair. But when the seasons change you will give a reading club in a park in your neighbourhood a chance and you will make new friends. The 동네 친구들 (neighbourhood friends) like you had as a child you had been wanting again.

You will bake brownies at 2 am in the night and have your home smell like comfort. You will get that promotion at work and realize you've been in the workforce for long enough to be a reporting manager and it will feel amusing because you still sometimes feel like that 21 year old fresh out of college starting your first job. You will buy sunflowers for your friends and your mom and sometimes forget to buy flowers for yourself.

Patterns will keep repeating and you will struggle to break them. You'll want to get a hammer and smash them because the consistency with which you will fall back into them is frustrating and appalling. But that way you will only end up smashing your own crutches. So, you will have to learn to get out of them the way you learned to get out of the pool at seven — slowly, without haste, without slipping, and with grace.

My love, you will feel like ending this life but in a way you would turn off the computer at 10 when it was glitching — from the main switch. But you can't do that no matter how much you wish sometimes you could. Because you could always start the computer again the next day. And you always would. Hang in there because instead we are going to hit refresh.

I love you. I am getting better a loving you. When you are in December, you'll see. My words to you are kinder and there's so much less shame and guilt and disgust. So, you may not experience any major milestones in 2024, but you do know that this too is a pretty big thing? Being softer and more patient with yourself. And so I'd say it will end up being a pretty good year over all. Net good.

Love, The me at the end of 2024

PS You'll get through every single thing you feel like you won't. I promise.

[hand-picked-star]

The 13th Annniversary Arshi Fiesta

Moodboard : historical AU

Whispers of the Heart | Chapter 02

I am not very good at writing ffs. I even read ffs very selectively. But it was an attempt of me to participate in the 13th-anniversary arshi fiesta. I might be wrong about certain aspects of that age and era, but it's a fantasy, so why not?

I don't own Arnav and Khushi and the story is purely fictional and has no relation to any living or dead. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

Chapter 2

After 10 years

Arnav was threading the busy traffic of the Bazar with his ambassador mark 1 to reach the St.Stephen all-women college of Delhi to pick up certain someone who he hadn't talked to, for almost 2 years. Though it was the cheapest car of that generation, it was his most prized possession at that moment, brought by the profit he got from his first export shipments of the textile factory he bought 1 year ago. But his mind was on that girl who lived in his mind rent-free till that fateful day 2 years ago and hadn't left ever since. Even at that moment, he could still feel her, if he closed his eyes.

Shaking himself off to get rid of that feeling, he concentrated on the road. Arnav's focus cleared to zoom in on that girl of question, no no, a young woman, in a simple white saree with a blue border, a mandatory college ware. The way she drapped the saree over her was very modest, but modesty seemed to allude Arnav today. His heart gave a thud realizing he could vividly feel how that petite body felt pressed to his. 'control yourself, Arnav. you've done so much damage already', Arnav chastised himself, willing his heart to a normal rhythm. Her jet-black hair was pleated into a single braid and a simple black bindi in the middle of her eyebrows that brought out her hazel-coloured doe eyes even more highlighted by a thin line of kajal. That was what Arnav was so scared of. Her little bindi had the power over him that the whole Oxford female fraternity didn't. He might have not talked to her but he saw her secretly every time he came to Dehli and watched her spread her wings like a butterfly to be the beautiful woman she ended up being. Roma Chachi had given her an apt name 'titliya'. All those times watching her from a distance Arnav tried his best to control his heart and mind, but ended up failing every single time. There was a reason why he avoided her for 2 years.

Khushi was standing at the gate of the college with her classmate, Sarita Chauhan, waiting for Akash Vai to pick her up. Khushi was irritated, she insisted on taking the rickshaw back home but due to the overprotective nature of Bhai and Babuji, she couldn't do that. But she didn't expect to see Him that day and somehow she knew he had come to pick her up. The last two years did a kind of magic to him or was it London or the girls of London to be exact, she didn't know. The Arnav sitting in front of her in that car donning the black glasses and clad in a rolled-up white shirt and black suspenders was a far cry from the man she last saw. But he was still Arnav among all of these, Her Arnav. That's why it didn't surprise her when her heart went overboard 'dhak-dhak,dhak-dhak,dhak-dhak'. Her friend beside her produced a small sound of appreciation,

"oh Khushi, you've never introduced me to your brothers. now I understand why." giving her a little nudge with her shoulder.

Khushi scoffed at her comment " he is not my brother. "

It's been 10 years since she lost her parents. And in the middle of all of these when Mahindar Chachu became her Babuji and Manoroma Chachi became Amma, she couldn't exactly pinpoint. And as a result, she got two brothers who loved her fiercely as their own. Abba had arranged a home tutor for her when she was 10 years old, because she couldn't bear the stress of public schooling. As soon as she started to form complete sentences her tutor advised her to write letters to her brothers, studying in Darjeeling. She wrote letters to Akash bhai and Aman bhai and then she wrote another letter to Arnav addressing him as 'Dear Arnav'. Her tutor chastised her for not adding a 'bhai' or a 'ji' at the end of his name. But Arnav was never her 'bhai', was he? He never felt like a 'bhai'. He was so much more. But above all, he was Her 'Arnav'.Just 'Arnav.' she used to call her 'Arnav' since she was 8. Nobody corrected her till she was 16. Then she started to call him 'Arnavji'. Now she didn't know what to call him anymore.

Arnav parked the car in front of her. when she made no move to sit inside, he took off the glasses unleashing his dark brown eyes on her. he opened the car door from inside and addressed her -

" what are you waiting for Khushi Kumari Gupta? Pandit bulake mahurat nikal na parega kya?" giving her the crooked half-smile that she adored. His familiar husky voice sent a wave of wistfulness through her. A thousand memories spun in her head, tangling together. God, she missed him so much. "Akash bhai and Aman are busy in the printing press. Cachu asked me to drop you home."

Khushi stared at him for another moment then with a huff she entered the car, which was a bad decision she understood not long after. Being in a closed space with him was torture. His enchanting woody scent engulfed her and transported her to a particular day that was in the centre of conflict between them. Both of them stared at anything but at each other, but soon Khushi couldn't resist the temptation to steal a look at him, which was a far worse decision than the previous one. Her eyes found his hands on the steering wheel, clutching it and as soon as a flashback of those hands flooded her mind - those hands clutching her smaller ones when they used to take a walk, those hands closing the hook of a payal around her ankles, those hands teaching her smaller ones to hold the chalk to write on the black slate, those hands helping her to plant rose plants on the garden. Her mind shifted to her smaller hands giving prasad to his larger ones, his hands cracking open the peanut shell for her whenever they went to the mela, his hands pulling her braids.'Have those hands become larger till the last time she saw them?' Khushi mused silently. Then a switch flipped in her mind, more flashbacks, she started to feel his hands on her cheek, on her waist, on the back of her head. Khushi closed her eyes tightly and clutched the books in her hands and to drive away those visions from her mind, blurted out what came to her mind at that moment " Anjali di said, you could not come to Delhi for another 3 months"

Arnav, looking at Khushi from the corner of his eyes, said "I didn't plan to. But My best friend is marrying my little sister. I wouldn't miss that wedding for the world and Roma Chachi said no more auspicious 'mohurat' after this month until the end of this year. And it's not like I have not been travelling to and fro between Delhi and London in the last couple of years."

Khushi nodding and trying to swallow down the hurt, said solemnly "I know."

Arnav had been studying law at Oxford University for the last couple of years. He had passed his bar exam and had been doing an apprenticeship under a Barrister in London for the last year. She knew all of this from Aman bhai. On the other hand, Arnav sold the land that his grandfather gave him and bought a run-down textile factory in old Delhi. She knew he had been very busy and she also knew he had been to Dehli multiple times in the last 2 years. He didn't stay in Rajput haveli nowadays when he came to Delhi. He had rented a two-storied bungalow on the outskirts of the town. But what hurt her more was he went to Rajput haveli to meet Amma and Babuji every time he came to Delhi, only when she was in school. So, it was not so difficult to figure out, who he was avoiding. Why, why she have to ruin the most important friendship she had in her life??? If only she wouldn't have done what she did 2 years ago.

It didn't escape Arnav's eyes the pain that flashed through her face. He still could read her like an open book, could decode the emotions that transpired through her pretty eyes. He regretted hurting her so much, but it was for the greater good. Sometimes he thought he preferred to remember her as still eight years old because she'd adored him then. She would gladly follow him anywhere. In fact, whenever she saw him leave, heading toward the garden where he liked to walk and think, she would come running after him. Even though she frequently fell, her little legs no match for his long, strong ones, she never cried and never complained. She was strong even back then.

Little Khushi used to fill their conversation with a million inquisitive questions though, looking at him with trusting big eyes. Her questions made him laugh and stumbled over answers.

When she was eight, he was her Hero.

As soon as the car reached Rajput Haveli, she all but sprinted away from him. Arnav sighed grabbing the package from the backseat he also entered the house. As soon as he reached the living room, he was met with Madhumati ji scolding Khushi for running around carelessly, even at the age of eighteen and her praying to God to give her 'sanka devi' same 'satbuddhi'. Then there was Roma Chachi, who came rushing towards him to give him a hug. Roma Chachi never failed to make him feel loved. Arnav admired this woman for her enormous capacity to love those who weren't hers.

"London suits you, Arnav Bitwa, look at you, how handsome you've turned out to be!!!! "

Arnav's tall figure folded itself to return her hug, teasing her he proceeded "And you didn't change at all Roma chachi. Still as gorgeous as ever. I missed you so much."

Manoroma smiled at him fondly. A child she once wished was hers so that she could have protected him from the heartbreak he endured at such a tender age " I missed you too, Bitwa. Don't be a stranger now like you have been for past years, ab toh hum ristedaar bhi banne wale hain."

Arnav smilled at her " I'll try."

Manoroma continued, "I hope you are staying with us this time, aren't you?" seeing Arnav nodding his head, she continued "Good, now I am going to the temple, we'll talk after I come back. chaliye, madhumati ji."

Arnav watched them leave and then silently proceeded toward the first floor crossing the stairs. At the very least, he could try to save whatever was left of the friendship he once shared with Khushi.

Khushi sat cross-legged on her bed, looking at the payal that broke as soon as she entered her room hurriedly a few minutes ago. It had been her room since her parents had died. It had seen so many of her tears and held so many of her secrets. Bua ji nowadays, began to get on her nerves, reminding everyone of her spinster status, but Khushi was adamant not to get married before she enrolled for college, now that she finally did it, she didn't have any excuses left.

Looking at the payal, Khushi thought of how it's been almost 10 years since she was wearing that particular payal. One morning 10 years ago, in the garden, looking at her rag doll, she confessed to Arnav that she used to have a similar payal like her doll once, that the bad guys had stolen from her too. And she missed wearing the payals. It was one of the first things she had admitted to Arnav during their long walks.

He'd asked her why she didn't just ask Mahindar Chachu and Chachi for payals and Khushi had tearfully confessed her fear that if she wanted too much, her new guardians would give her away. And the sound of payals must disturbed them as well.

That very weekend, he'd bought her this payal and its pair. She'd loved it. It was the first time since her parents died that she'd bounced in places with joy like she was really eight and not eighty. She giggled with her delighted-little-girl pleasure.

Khushi stared at the payal with a sad smile on her face. The clasp had been given away. Just like their relationship now. She still remembered how the payals were too big for her small ankles, he had to make a loop at the end to adjust them to her size.

Arnav had adored her once.

But she'd messed that up good and proper a long time ago. But did she really mess it up beyond repair?

A knock on the door drew her thoughts out of the past. To her surprise, it was Arnav standing in the doorway, his expression as passive as ever. "Can I come in?"

She nodded, automatically scooting backwards to lean back against her headboard. He came to sit in front of her, and Khushi smirked, remembering playing Ludo with him at that same position, at that same spot when she was 10, 11, 12.

"What are you laughing at?" he asked, curious. A smile played at his lips that made her heart feel like a thunder about to strike.

"I was just remembering beating you in ludo," she said quietly. In her room, it was harder to be aloof as she tried to be with him. How long had she been trying to show him she was grown up, grown past the foolish girl she'd been when they...

His smile broadened but only slightly. Still, it was enough to make her blood feel warmer. "So you found a game you can actually beat me at, Phati sari. Don't get arrogant." He pointed a finger in her face.

Laughing lightly, she remembered the origin of her nickname at the kanya puja day, when she was 10, Amma had made her wear a red saree made for little girls. it was so beautiful. She ran to the garden to show it to Arnav where he was helping Babuji to sow the vegetable seeds and ended up tearing the pretty saree in that process. She cried the whole day so much that Babuji ended up buying two more similar sarees just like that. But she couldn't get away from the torment of Arnav's teasing. She gained that nickname a day later. she stared down at her lap, tracing the broken payal with the pad of her finger. He sounded like his old self just then addressing her with the name he gave her, the one who wasn't so uncomfortable and cold around her. 'O Devi maiya, what do she need to sacrifice to have that again.' she sighed and asked "So what did you want to talk about?"

"This is awkward," he said after a moment of silence. "It seems almost pompous for me to say I'm proud of you."

"Why do you think it's pompous?" she asked, curiously. "I mean, everyone else has said it... unless you don't mean it."

"Of course I mean it," he said, his tone sincere. "A graduate degree in English literature" He looked down, then back at her again"You always wanted to be a writer. I am sorry I wasn't there when you enrolled on college, I should have been there." he said with a decisive, displeased tone. "I know I haven't been as supportive as I could have been these last few years."

Khushi shook her head. Arnav had always been something of an enigma to her. Well, not always. There was a time when their relationship had been simple. At some point, something had changed. What that was, Khushi was still at a loss as to explain. She knew when the switchover had happened, though.

"Arnav," she said with a sigh. "If it hadn't been for you, I wouldn't have even tried to get into a college. You have always encouraged me to write and kept me interested in the world of literature with the books you used to send me."He even sent her books when he was avoiding her those last few years.

Looking up at him, she smiled. "you were the only one who never doubted my capabilities. You just seemed so certain I could do it - even if it would be hard."

"Most things worth doing are difficult," he said quietly. "It never occurred to me to doubt you. If that was what you wanted, I knew you were capable."

And because he knew, she believed, she thought but didn't say. "It was difficult. Still, I did it, and I think I made the right choice. You had everything to do with that."

Their silence then was not so awkward, but more comfortable. Then Arnav reminded the package in his hand and extended it to her. As soon as she saw the package, her face brightened with a brilliant smile and she all but tore the packaging of the book. 'A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens ' It's her favourite book, but it was special.

"you brought me the first edition" She looked in awe both at the book and at the man. When the awe subsided awkwardness seeped in. Arnav was about to leave.

"Arnav," she began hurriedly, blowing out a breath in a huff, she was ready to right wrongs in her life, and start fresh. "I know you've been... wary about seeing me since... since then. And I don't blame you. I know things have been strange for a long time. But I was a stupid girl then. A lot has changed - I've changed. I'm not going to... do that again. So if that's what you're worried about-"

"Khushi," he said quickly, reaching across the space that separated them, putting his index finger over her lips.

For the space of a few breaths, Khushi's heartbeat began to stutter. Time stood still, their breaths caught. She didn't know how long it had been since she was watching his hooded eyes, looking at his dilated pupil.

And then a moment later, a curtain seemed to fall over his expressive eyes, hiding all the secrets she so desperately wanted to reveal, his eyes holding hers. He let his hand drop slowly before he broke eye contact, staring out the window. For long moments, he was silent. "It's not you. It's never been you."

She waited, but he didn't seem inclined to explain further. "Is it so unthinkable ?" she asked finally. She cringed because she'd feared the answer to this question for years. He was her best friend, her confidant - the most important person in her life since almost before she could remember. That had never changed. And she didn't want to lose him. She would take him in whatever capabilities he would like to share with her.

"Is what so unthinkable?" he asked, dreading the answer himself.

"Can't we try to be friends again?" Her voice was quiet, and she struggled to make it not waiver. It felt strangely like her world would crumble if he put the final nail in the coffin of their relationship, as melodramatic as that sounded.

To her surprise, his eyes were wide, almost horrified. He shook his head, chuckling nervously. He thought she would ask about something else. "I never imagined you would interpret my attitude that way." He rubbed a hand over his chin, tracing the line of stubble - it had been some days since he'd shaved. She'd noticed that almost instantly when he walked in the door. She still remembered the way that little bit of stubble felt, brushing against her cheek.

"To answer your question, of course, we can be friends. I've never not been your friend," he said finally.

This cheered her considerably, and Khushi sat up straight, smiling. "Good."

@arshifiesta @featheredclover @phuljari @msbhagirathi

<previous> | <next>

[coochiequeens]

After stories like this break I always hope it will lead to those supporting surrogacy to agree that there needs to needs to be more regulations.

IVF Centers in Delhi NCR: CBI Uncovers Child Trafficking and Fake Doctors in Fertility Clinics

CBI investigation reveals alarming illegal activities in Delhi NCR fertility clinics, including child trafficking, illegal surrogacy, and employment of unqualified practitioners. The probe exposes violations of the Surrogacy Regulation Act 2021 and links to organized crime. This shocking revelation raises urgent questions about regulation and patient safety in the fertility industry, prompting calls for immediate reform and stricter oversight.

Posted byby Ajay Gupta Political journalistAugust 3, 2024

NEW DELHI, August 3, 2024 – A recent investigation by the Central Bureau of Investigation (CBI) has unveiled a disturbing network of illegal activities within In Vitro Fertilization (IVF) centers across Delhi NCR, sending shockwaves through the fertility industry and raising urgent questions about regulation and oversight.

IVF Centers in Delhi NCR Key Findings

Numerous IVF centers Delhi NCR implicated in child trafficking schemes

Surrogate mothers exploited in violation of the Surrogacy (Regulation) Act, 2021

Organized syndicates linked to organ trade and forced begging identified

Fake medical credentials and forged adoption documents discovered

The Investigation Unfolds IVF centers Delhi NCR

The CBI’s probe, which began as an inquiry into a single child trafficking incident, quickly ballooned into a comprehensive examination of the fertility industry in the National Capital Region. Investigators uncovered a complex web of illegal activities, with some IVF centers serving as hubs for various criminal enterprises.

“What we’ve found is deeply troubling,” said CBI spokesperson Rajesh Kumar. “These centers, which should be helping families, have instead become conduits for exploitation and trafficking.”

A Pattern of Abuse Illegal IVF centers

The investigation revealed multiple schemes operating under the guise of legitimate fertility services:

Baby Trafficking: Newborns purchased from surrogate mothers were sold to childless couples or, more alarmingly, to criminal networks.

Illegal Surrogacy: Despite the ban on commercial surrogacy, many centers continued to offer paid surrogacy services, exploiting economically vulnerable women.

Document Forgery: Staff at several clinics were found creating false adoption papers and medical records.

Unqualified Practitioners: Some centers employed individuals with fake medical degrees, putting patients at severe risk.

Legal Framework and Violations

The Surrogacy (Regulation) Act, 2021, explicitly prohibits commercial surrogacy in India, allowing only altruistic arrangements. However, the CBI’s findings indicate widespread disregard for these regulations.

“The law is clear,” explained Dr. Shalini Mishra, a legal expert in reproductive rights.

“Surrogacy can only be altruistic, with no financial compensation beyond medical expenses. What we’re seeing here is a blatant violation of both the letter and spirit of the law.”

The Greater Noida Gang

In April 2022, authorities arrested a gang operating out of an IVF center in Greater Noida. The group, which included two female employees of the clinic, lured prospective parents with promises of baby boys, a practice strictly forbidden under Indian law.

The Fake Doctor Incident

September 2022 saw the arrest of an IVF clinic owner following the death of a woman during a procedure. Subsequent investigation revealed the owner’s medical degree was fraudulent.

The Egg Donor Mastermind

A 2021 case involved the rescue of a two-year-old child from a trafficking ring. The operation’s leader was discovered to be an egg donor with connections to multiple hospitals in the region.

Implications IVF Centers in Delhi NCR

The scale of illegal activities uncovered by the CBI raises serious concerns about the oversight of fertility clinics in India.

Dr. Amit Banerjee, a reproductive health specialist, warns of far-reaching consequences:

“This isn’t just about illegal adoptions or surrogacy. We’re talking about potential links to organ trafficking, forced labor, and other forms of exploitation. The ramifications for public health and safety are enormous.”

As the investigation continues, calls for reform are growing louder. Experts suggest several key steps:

Enhanced Monitoring: Implement more frequent and rigorous inspections of IVF centers.

Stricter Licensing: Tighten requirements for operating fertility clinics.

Patient Education: Launch public awareness campaigns about legal surrogacy and adoption processes.

Inter-Agency Cooperation: Improve coordination between health authorities, law enforcement, and child welfare organizations.

The CBI’s investigation into illegal IVF centers in Delhi NCR has exposed a dark underbelly of the fertility industry, highlighting urgent needs for reform and vigilance. As authorities work to dismantle these criminal networks, the challenge remains to ensure that legitimate fertility services can operate safely and ethically, providing hope to families while protecting the vulnerable from exploitation.

For the latest updates on this developing story, visit the CBI’s official website or follow our continuing coverage.

[octuscle]

What's up bro? After that lunar landing, India seems like the place to be! Problem is, I don't think the suitcase I brought will be enough for me to last seeing everything from the Taj Mahal to the golden temple. Can I borrow one of the DEL suitcases?

There is actually another suitcase. A fairly new aluminum suitcase from RIMOWA. Looks very expensive. And doesn't necessarily match your dusty and sweaty tourist outfit…. But since no one else has contacted me: Have fun with it!

Delhi… A really huge city. But also really challenging for a tourist who doesn't speak Hindi. But slowly you get used to the strange English they speak here. And somehow you finally find the Airbnb in the old city, a stone's throw from the Red Fort. It smells of sweat, urine and exotic spices in the stairwell. The stairs are steep and you are pretty tired. Heaving your suitcases up is really exhausting. But you have made it. You'll see what's in the big new suitcase tomorrow. You just want to sleep. It looks like the bed in the room hasn't even been made yet. You don't care about that now. Just sleep…

When you wake up the next morning, your old suitcase is gone. But also your old pajamas are gone. You lie naked in bed. And something is different… Your morning wood is hard as steel. Hehehehe, that's not bad… But it's also darker somehow. A shade like a coffee with a shot of milk. Coffee! Yes, you need it now. You get out of the silk-sheeted bed and your boner leads you like a divining rod to the coffee maker in the alcove between your dressing room and the master bath. After the first coffee, quickly take a shower and then get dressed.

And then a second coffee. Your driver will be here soon. Good thing your suitcase is already packed next to you.

You don't like Noida. But many of your friends live there because they have located their startup companies there and it is easier to find capable software developers. But that's not your world either. Your family made their money generations ago in real estate and in the textile industry. And you now head the banking and finance division in your family holding company. After all, you have financed some of your friends' startups. And today one of your friends is getting married. In Noida. You'll survive that, too.

The journey was long, as usual. Getting out of Delhi takes time. But at least you were able to make a number of phone calls while your driver navigated the car safely through the traffic chaos. Now you have moved into your suite. In the corridor hectic movements between the rooms. Bridesmaids and other guests scurry from room to room. You hate this hassle. In life, you would never think of getting married. But the bellboy who carried your suitcase upstairs was hot. You call the front desk and ask for someone to help you unpack your luggage and get dressed. The hotel is one of the most preferred locations for weddings in Noida. You are a regular guest here. They know your preferences. And the bellboys love your cock. You can already imagine that now there will be a fight again, who is allowed to blow you and gets the tip for it.

Yes, that was good… Your cock dangles relaxed between your legs. Your clothes fit perfectly. So on to the ballroom. And let's see who is your boring dinner companion this time.

[bellasmumblingsandmusings]

30 Questions for Your Tav! (Sima)

Heads up for MAJOR SPOILERS for What Could Have Been! After the cut!

What would your Tav’s greetings be (at different levels of approval)? Neutral: “Looks like you need someone to clean up your mess. Lucky for you, I’m here.” Low Approval: “You’ve made this harder than it needs to be. I don’t trust you, and that’s not about to change.” High Approval: “Well, well, if it isn’t my favorite spell-slinger. Let’s see what kind of trouble we can stir up today, shall we?” Romantic Approval: “You know, I’m starting to think you might be the only person I could ever really... trust. That’s dangerous.”

Describe their tent setup! What’s on the outside? The inside? Outside: Sima’s tent is simple but weather-proofed with elemental charms, and a small, well-kept rapier stands near the entrance—a mark of her readiness for a spar at any time. Inside: Inside, there’s a delicate maang tika tucked into a hidden pouch—a treasured keepsake from her mother. The deep jewel tones of teal, purple, and green adorn her bedroll and blanket, giving the interior a rich, comforting feel. Books on strategy and magic are neatly stacked next to her rapier and spell components.

What would their character quest be titled? Why? “Winds of Calimport” The quest takes the player back to Calimport, a bustling city reminiscent of a blend between Lahore, Delhi, and Mumbai—full of vibrant streets, chaos, and beauty. Sima must face old enemies and confront the legacy of her mother, as well as her own turbulent past. The title reflects both her storm magic and the tumultuous city where she was forged.

What would your Tav’s romance scenes look like? How many would they have? Sima’s romance scenes would be full of chemistry and intense energy. Each scene would reflect a balance of passion, strength, and vulnerability, from quiet moments during a storm to sparring sessions that turn playful and affectionate. Three romance scenes:

The first would be a lighthearted, teasing moment during a sparring match, with the sparks of their connection growing stronger.

The second would delve deeper into her past and struggles, where she finally opens up about surviving sexual assault.

The third would be a passionate, intimate scene under the crackling energy of a storm, reflecting both their deep connection and their shared history of strength and survival.

Describe their idle animations! Sima frequently sharpens her rapier, performs hand-to-hand combat drills, or conjures small orbs of lightning that dance across her fingertips. Occasionally, she stretches or adjusts her combat gear, always ready for action. In quiet moments, she hums a soft, stormy melody.

How would the player go about meeting them in Act 1? What is their introduction? The player meets Sima amidst a chaotic thunderstorm on the streets, where she’s fending off a group of bandits. With swift movements, she handles the last of them using both her rapier and a crackling burst of lightning. Her introduction is direct and wary, but she acknowledges the player’s skills, giving them a chance to earn her trust.

Describe their arc. How would a player help resolve it? What choices can be made? Can your Tav be turned down a dark path, or pulled to a lighter one? Sima’s arc focuses on reconciling her storm sorcery powers with her past trauma and her desire for freedom. Her relationship with her mother’s legacy as a spy and courtesan is pivotal, as well as her history of surviving sexual assault, which is an empowering part of her identity. The player helps her decide whether to embrace power as a tool for revenge or to use it as a force for good.

Dark Path: She becomes ruthless, using her powers and combat skills to exact revenge on her enemies and those who threaten her autonomy, regardless of the cost.

Light Path: Sima chooses to control her power, using it to protect others and find peace with her past. She becomes a protector of justice, helping those who can’t help themselves.

After Act 3, what does their life look like? What are they talking about at the reunion party? At the reunion, Sima would be proud of how far she’s come. She talks about continuing her work as a mercenary, traveling freely between Baldur’s Gate and Calimport. She might joke with Wyll about their sparring sessions or reminisce about the stormy nights spent bonding with Astarion.

What’s the significance behind your Tav’s name? Sima means “treasure” in ancient elvish, symbolizing how much she meant to her mother, who saw her as the only precious thing in their hard life.

Does your Tav have a last name? Is there a meaning behind it? Sima has no last name, which represents her desire to forge her own path and not be defined by anyone but herself.

What is your Tav’s go-to comfort food? Spiced lamb kebabs—the rich, bold flavors remind her of Calimport’s lively street markets and better days with her mother.

Does your Tav have any tattoos or scars? Why? Sima has no scars, but she wears her maang tika as a reminder of her mother’s teachings and their bond.

What is your Tav’s main color palette? Why do they choose those colors? Teal, deep purple, and rich green. These jewel tones reflect her vibrant personality and stormy sorcery, while also symbolizing the rich cultural heritage of her Calimport upbringing.

Where are they from? What was home like? Sima is from Calimport, a bustling city of vibrant markets and dangerous streets, reminiscent of a blend between Lahore, Delhi, and Mumbai. Life was chaotic and unpredictable, but it’s where she learned to survive.

Is your Tav more likely to fight/flight/freeze/fawn? Fight. Sima was trained to handle danger head-on, both with magic and hand-to-hand combat. She’s always ready to take action rather than flee.

What do they do for fun, when not adventuring? What are their hobbies? Sima enjoys sparring with Astarion and Wyll. She also practices her lute and reads poetry or books on strategy. When she has downtime, she’ll meditate by the water, connecting with the storm’s energy.

Do they have any enemies outside of the main plot? Any friends? Sima shares many of Astarion’s enemies as he rises to power as a Vampire Lord. Old enemies from Calimport, including slavers and rival guilds, still have grudges. She also has friends within the camp, particularly Wyll, who shares her love of sparring and justice.

Where/with whom do they feel safest? Sima feels safest with Astarion. Despite his transformation, their bond is one of deep trust and understanding. She also finds camaraderie with Wyll, who understands the complexities of balancing power with morality.

What is their MBTI Type? INTJ. Sima is a strategic thinker, independent and resourceful. She values knowledge and planning, and while she appears detached, she deeply cares for those she trusts.

What is their relationship to touch? Do they shy away from it? Do they need it to feel present? Sima is selective about who touches her, but once trust is established, she is confident and passionate. She’s comfortable in her own skin, a testament to both her mother’s influence as a courtesan and her own experiences. Touch, in trusted company, is something she enjoys—it grounds her and connects her to those she cares about. Her trauma manifests not in guardedness but in a fierce need to protect vulnerable people, particularly those who have faced similar struggles.

Describe a defining moment from their past, which makes them who they are today! Sima overheard her mother give the order to kill her father when she was just a child. This moment shattered the small innocence she had left and revealed the harsh realities of their world. It marked the beginning of her mother’s fall from grace, which eventually left Sima destitute and alone, forcing her to stow away to Baldur’s Gate at the age of six. This moment defined her resilience, her ability to survive on her own, and her resolve to never let power or betrayal destroy her.

How is your Tav’s relationship with their family? Their parents? Sima loved her mother, despite the complexities of their life together. Her mother’s role as both a courtesan and a spy taught Sima many of the skills that shaped her, but also left her with a painful legacy. After her mother’s death, Sima was left alone to fend for herself, and the knowledge that her mother orchestrated her father’s death adds layers of unresolved emotions. Her relationship with her father was nonexistent, but knowing her mother arranged his death left a mark on her.

How does your Tav act in situations of stress? In moments of peace? Under Stress: Sima is assertive, going straight into fight-and-defend mode. She is a fighter through and through, and her resilience is both stubborn and admirable. She channels her anger into action, protecting herself and those she cares about. In Peace: Sima enjoys using her combat skills, whether through sparring with Astarion or Wyll, or honing her magic. But more than that, she loves to laugh around the fire, teasing her companions with witty banter. She finds peace in moments of humor and connection, embracing the camaraderie that comes with shared adventures.

What does your Tav consider to be their own biggest character flaw? Sima’s biggest flaw is not just her difficulty in trusting others but her tendency to see the good in people, even when it clouds her judgment. This can lead her to give people too much leeway, especially when they’ve shown signs of being untrustworthy.

What is something they would die on a hill over? Freedom and justice for the vulnerable. Sima will not stand by while others are oppressed or exploited. She’s willing to fight, bleed, and die for the right of others to live free, especially those who remind her of the struggles she’s endured.

Give us one of your Tav’s secrets! Sima knows her father was killed on her mother’s orders. Her mother never spoke of it, but Sima overheard the order when she was young. It’s a secret that has haunted her, knowing that this act set off the events that led to her mother’s fall from grace and eventual death.

What is the worst thing they’ve ever done/said to someone they love? In a moment of frustration, Sima tells Astarion, “When will you stop using your pain to excuse your actions? When will your past suffering stop being a shield for your worst excesses?” This cuts deeply because, while true, it reflects Sima’s own fears about him losing himself to the darkness. It’s a harsh reminder of the gap growing between them as Astarion continues down the path of ascension.

Describe a smell that reminds your Tav of childhood. The rich, spiced aroma of chili and cinnamon brings Sima back to the vibrant, chaotic streets of Calimport. It’s a scent of both warmth and survival, from the bustling markets where she and her mother once walked together, to the dangerous underworld they had to navigate.

What fears keep them up at night? Sima’s greatest fear is losing herself to power. While she desires strength, the thought of becoming consumed by the darkness—much like she fears is happening with Astarion—keeps her awake at night. She’s afraid of becoming something she no longer recognizes, or worse, something she can’t control.

What does your Tav want more than anything? Sima desires freedom, not just for herself but for those around her. She wants to live in a world where she isn’t defined by her past or her trauma, where she can be powerful without losing herself. At the same time, she longs for Astarion to find his way back from the darkness, for both of them to wield their power without being consumed by it.

No pressure tagging! Thanks to @for-tymora for the original list! Tagging!: @bardic-inspo @roguishcat @pursuitseternal @fangsandfracturedhearts

[hand-written-dreams]

CRIMSON SHADE

Chapter 10

Weddings and Vendettas

He's a wolf in disguise

But I can't stop staring in those evil eyes

- ( The song of the chapter is 'Monster' by Lady Gaga)

Khushi sits silently at her desk, gently caressing the bandage on her wrist. With every blink, her eyelashes stir, each moment bringing a new flash of the same memory, vivid and unrelenting.

Rain.

Raindrops.

Raindrops clinging to long lashes.

Lashes framing beautiful brown eyes.

Fingers clutching a coat lapel,

Fingers circling a delicate wrist.

Teeth clenched around a glass piece.

Lips curled into a barely-there smirk.

Buaji's voice cuts through the trance. "Haire Nand Kishore, you're drenched! You'll catch a cold!" she fusses, rubbing a towel through Khushi's hair. Her eyes dart to Khushi's wrist, and a gasp escapes her lips. "What happened to your wrist?"

"It's just a tiny cut, Buaji. Don't worry."

"Are you feeling dizzy?"

"Why would I feel dizzy?"

"Because the sight of blood makes you dizzy, bitiya. Are you alright?"

"Oh," Khushi says, a trace of bitter amusement in her voice as she remembers the younger version of herself, the one who would faint and vomit at the mere sight of her own blood. Buaji doesn't know, that Khushi died a long time ago. The girl who once crumbled at the sight of red vanished the day she ended a man's life. Blood doesn't bother her much anymore. She's learned how to control it. Like she's learned to control the feelings coursing through her blood.... rage, fear, desire....

Except when 'he' is near.

One particular Armani-clad individual still makes her blood boil, agitating her to the point that she forgets all of her old phobias.

She can't decide if that's a good thing or a bad one.

It can't be anything but disastrous.

He is poisoning her blood.

.

.

.

When Khushi steps out of the shower, wearing her favourite pajamas with towel wrapped loosely around her hair, she sees Buaji rummaging through her cupboard, pulling out every designer outfit she owns.

"What are you doing, Buaji?"

"Didn't Mr.Jha tell you, bitiya? We are going to Gurgaon."

"For what?"

"The Oberoi's eldest son is getting married!...what you guys tell it these days..oh huh..'destination' or something. Obviously, all of Delhi's elites will be there. So, Mr.Jha is taking us with him."

"When?"

"As far as I know, we're supposed to prepare for a two-day stay there, this Saturday and Sunday."

Oh, Sucks.

This puts such a damper on her 'find-the-evidence-and-get-the-hell-out- of-here' project. Two days of mundane chatter, ridiculous cosplays and forced pleasantries. Fake smiles and empty wishes will be used left, right and centre. Weddings bore her to death. Why does she even need to attend? She doesn't know the bride or groom.

Uff..

But of course, Mr.Jha is busy trying to establish every connection he can before his election. Shakti Singh Oberoi isn't just one of the richest men in the city, Mr.Jha's real interest probably lies in the fact that the Oberoi family has a long list of people in Parliament right now. It's always about power and politics.

Buaji holds up two lehengas in front of her, waiting for Khushi to choose.

"Pick whichever you like, Buaji. I don't care."

"What will I do with her? Fine, I'm picking the red one," Buaji huffs.

Khushi rolls her eyes. Buaji can't be more predictable. "Not the red one."

"Why? Red looks good on you, bitiya."

"I'm kind of hating the red colour nowadays. What about pick the purple one."

Khushi connects her phone to the charger as buaji keeps sorting her clothes. She wraps herself in her blanket and drifts off to sleep.

But brown eyes invade her dreams.

Vivid, relentless, and inescapable.

.

.

.

It's insufferable. He is insufferable. That egoistic man is not letting her sleep at night. Khushi throws off her covers and sits up in her bed, dragging her laptop toward her. She will teach him a lesson. What leverage does he have against her again? A CCTV footage. She will hack his phone and erase that footage.

She fiddles with her phone. She has his number, right? He's sent her a text with that video. With a few taps, she searches for his contact.

What the fuck...

Of course, it's encrypted. But it's an encryption she can break.

"Game on, Mr.Raizada. Since the day we met, all you've done is threaten me and pin me against the wall. Now you've crossed your limits. You're pinning me in my dreams as well. I will show you what messing with me will cost you."

Her eyes gleam as her fingers fly across the keyboard, the adrenaline coursing through her veins. A smile stretches across her face as she cracks the code and is almost one tap away from erasing all the information from his phone when her laptop hangs. The screen scrambles with a warning about virus detection, and she curses under her breath as the laptop goes into self-preservation mode.

Frustrated, she rubs her eyes. Her phone beeps with an incoming message. An unknown number.

'Nice try, little bird.'

.

.

.

For the next few days, Khushi looks like a zombie. Not only is she plagued by the same dreams--or nightmares, as she prefers to call them--but nothing interesting is happening in her father's study either. Apparently, the wolves haven't yet discovered who killed their beloved daughter, so the serpents are safe, at least for now.

All of these make Khushi ponder a certain offer. It doesn't feel so bad sitting in her own bedroom, frustrated with empty search results and the impending mind-numbing conversations with a bunch of unknown wedding guests. An IT expert at a tech company-her classmates would salivate over a job like that straight out of college. She knows it's not her qualifications that are getting her this opportunity; it's because of something she can do for him.

Then there's what he said about providing evidence against her father. Ugh... why does she become such a fireball in his presence? He was right. She asked all the wrong questions. Instead of inquiring about the evidence he mentioned, how he got it, and how she could use it, she let his threats get to her and lost her shit entirely.

"I expected more from you, Khushi," she chides herself, banging her head against her laptop. It's a new task for her now, a new skill to learn: how to keep her cool in the presence of Mr.Arnav Singh Raizada.

But she doesn't have his number. How will she contact him? The encrypted number is a one-way street; she can't text him back.

There goes the offer. Now she has to wait for another chance meeting with him to tell him she'll work for him, but only if she can lay down some conditions of her own.

And the worst part? She has no idea when or if she'll meet him again in the near future.

The uncertainty gnaws at her, leaving her more frustrated than ever as she packs her bag for the wedding she is going to attend. The wedding is set in a luxury resort just on the outskirts of the city, no more than a two-hour drive away.

As she tosses clothes into her trolley, her mind races with scenarios, each more outrageous than the last, where she meets him again and tells him about her accepting his offer. She can already imagine the smug look on his face, that infuriating smirk that makes her want to scream, punch and wipe that smile from his face all at once.

But beneath the annoyance, there's a spark of determination. If she can just see him again, she'll find a way to turn the tables. She won't let him intimidate her or pin her down anymore.

Then her thoughts shatter as ice water of realization washes over her. What's the point of thinking about the offer or accepting it? Her father would never allow her to work, and neither would Mr.Jha. She can never do it anyway. She grits her teeth and snaps her trolley shut.

Khushi sits stiffly at the long banquet table, flanked by her father and Mr.Jha, her hands resting on her lap beneath the lavishly decorated tablecloth. The glittering wedding hall around her feels suffocating, the loud hum of chatter and laughter grating against her nerves. Her father, seated to her right, exchanges polite conversation with the other guests, his tone authoritative, as always. To her left, Mr.Jha, the epitome of perfection, flashes his charming smile to those who pass by, looking every bit the polished, well-bred man her father adores.

But Khushi feels disconnected. She is drowning in a world of pretension and formality, a world where every word is calculated, every action rehearsed. The air is thick with the scent of expensive perfumes and freshly cut flowers, but it only reminds her how out of place she feels here.

The fabric of her lehenga digs into her skin. She wishes she could tie her hair up, but the makeup artist had styled it in loose waves cascading around her shoulders. The heavy jewellery weighs her down, making her body ache.

She should feel honoured to be seated between these two powerful men, her father's pride and her fiancé's polished charm surrounding her. But all she feels is trapped. Her thoughts swirl with a mixture of resentment and exhaustion. The glittering lights, the perfect smiles, the endless small talk, it all feels hollow.

Her gaze flickers across the room, trying to avoid the eyes of those who expect her to smile, to play the role of the dutiful daughter and future wife. But beneath the calm exterior, her heart races. Her body is present, but her mind is far away.

She softly drums against the linen, as Her eyes drift up, almost instinctively, and there he is.

So the Eagles are here as well, huh?

He is indeed an Eagle through and through, his presence alone exudes power. He’s draped in a deep brown suit-type sherwani, she isn’t quite sure what they are called. The tailored fabric clings perfectly to his imposing frame, every seam accentuating the breadth of his shoulders and the straight line of his posture. The deep, almost regal brown not only adds a richness to his look, but also brings out his eyes even more. She huffs closing her eyes.

He might be an asshole, but he's the kind you can't help but stare at. The traditional attire only adds to his appeal, making him infuriatingly hard to ignore, despite the attitude that comes with it. His presence demands attention, and no matter how arrogant he seems, there's no denying he's dangerously attractive.

His dark gaze fixed on her from across the room. His expression is unreadable, but the intensity behind his eyes is unmistakable. A shiver runs down her spine. A spark ignites in the air between them that no one else seems to notice. She quickly looks away, her pulse racing.

But the pull is undeniable. She glances back at him, catching his gaze once more. She was looking forward to this moment, the chance to meet him face-to-face once more. Her lips curve into a small, almost imperceptible smile, one she tries to suppress but can not. It doesn't escape him. One of his eyebrows lifts up.

And her breath catches. And in that split second, Khushi feels like they are the only two people in the room, locked in a battle of unspoken words and unreadable expressions. But that slight lift of his brow, that glint in his eyes-it tells her he knows. He always knows.

From the corner of her eye, she sees the wedding planner she was introduced to earlier, guiding the Eagles toward the table where she sits. Her heart skips a beat as she watches the group approach slowly. As soon as the first one arrives, the atmosphere shifts. One by one, the members of the Eagles come into view, their faces hardening the instant they spot who is already seated. It takes only a split second. A cold realization ripples through the group. This was a mistake. The wrong families had been seated together.

The wedding planner, blissfully unaware of the gravity of the situation, smiles brightly at all of them. She tenses, her eyes flicking toward Mr.Jha, who sits rigidly beside her. A conversation runs through her mind.

"He said he was sure about who killed his father. But how could that be? The person he's talking about was just a boy back then...what, 14 or 15?"

Her eyes snaps back to the brown one.

Oh no!

The tension becomes palpable, thick enough to choke on. Guests at the table shift uncomfortably in their seats, casting uneasy glances at one another.

Mr.Rathore exchanges a sharp glance with Mr.Raizada before his gaze slid to her father, then to Mr.Jha, his lips pressed into a thin line, the displeasure clear despite his outward calm. "Well, this is.....unexpected," Mr.Rathore muttered, his voice cold, eyes darting between the Serpents already seated at the table.

Tension spikes when one of the men beside Mr.Raizada, makes a move to grab the collar of the wedding planner, his temper threatening to erupt. But Mr.Raizada raises a hand, a silent command, and the man freezes. Without breaking his composure, Mr.Raizada pulls a chair out in a smooth motion and gestures Mr.Rathore to sit. Then, with deliberate calm, he pulls out the chair beside Mr.Rathore and sits down himself. He leans back slightly, crossing his arms over his chest. "Forgive the wedding planner for the misunderstanding, Rakesh," he says, with his unsettlingly neutral voice with no malice, no hatred, no rage, no irritation, nothing. "After all, we are all friends here, aren't we?"

Her pulse quickens. She doesn't need to glance at her father to know his jaw is clenched, his fingers likely curled into tight fists beneath the table. And yet, mr.Raizada remains disturbingly calm, too calm. His eyes scan the faces of the serpents, not a single emotion flickering across his features. If anything, he seems amused, as if he's daring them to react, to make the first move.

Mr.Jha gives a curt nod,"Of course," he bites out, faking a smile. There aren't only the members of the Serpents and the Eagles, there are also Mr.Jha's political allies. He has to save face.

Across from her, the brown eyes briefly meet hers before he addresses everyone, "I trust we can make it through a few hours without incident," his voice low but carrying enough weight to silence the murmurs around the table.

The Eagles exchange wary glances as they hesitate for a beat before taking their seats. She watches across from her Junior Rathore quietly takes his place beside Mr.Raizada and then the two girls she saw at the restaurant earlier slide into the seats beside him. One of them, petite, with big dark eyes flashes her a small, secretive smile. The other, with glossy dark hair and a bit more confidence, sneaks a wave as though they're old friends sharing a private joke.

Strange. She frowns. Yet her lips twitch at the surrealness of the situation.

“Oh, darling, you’re here! Sorry, I’m late,” a singsong voice says as a freshly manicured finger trails across Mr.Rathore’s shoulder. A gorgeous woman in a black saree slides into the seat beside him. Ah yes, Mr.Rathore’s girlfriend, Sheetal Kapoor. The envy of all the men in the society.

Slowly, they begin to converse among themselves, and the atmosphere around the table settles back into a semblance of normalcy. Conversations ebb and flow as laughter punctuates the air. Khushi takes a sip of her cold drink, letting the chill pass through her, while her gaze drifts across the table.

There he is, blatantly staring at her, swirling his drink in the glass with a casual nonchalance that betrays his boredom. The corner of his lips quirks up.

She can't help but feel the heat rising in her cheeks under his unwavering gaze. It's as if he's dissecting her every move, and for a moment, she wonders if he can read her thoughts. With a quick glance, she meets his eyes, holding his gaze for a heartbeat longer than necessary before looking away, trying to regain her composure.

She rolls her eyes internally, refusing to let him see how flustered he makes her. "So charming," she mutters under her breath, hoping the sarcasm will help ease the tension brewing between them. But inside, she feels that familiar spark igniting again, making her pulse race.

She steals another glance, catching him smirking now, that infuriatingly confident smirk that tells her he knows exactly what effect he has on her. The table buzzes around them as the two of them are locked in a silent battle of wills.

The conversation around them shifts into the importance of female education, equality and how Mr.Jha is doing excellent job in this regards, but she has tuned it out.

She places her glass almost defiantly and crosses her arms, looking at him fully, refusing to look away. His smirk stretches further. It's smooth and teasing. He's savouring every second of their little game.

But the game is cut short when a woman, one of the wives of a business associate seated with the Serpents, turns her attention to Khushi with a warm, curious smile

"What about you, bitiya? Are you attending college?"

She blinks, breaking her staring contest, and smooths the napkin over her lap. Her composure slips back into place. She clears her throat, quickly scrambling to switch gears from their wordless duel to the polite conversation at hand.

"Oh, um..." she starts, offering the woman a polite smile. "I've graduated recently from IIT Delhi. Computer Science"

"She’s graduated with honours. We are very proud of her." Mr.Jha adds to their conversation.

The lady smiles radianty at her , "Oh, that's excellent. A girl in Computer Science. I'm so intrigued. Are you doing anything right now? Are you applying for higher education? Masters or PhD or anything else?"

"Umm.... I guess I'm now on a creative hiatus...exploring few..... personal interests."

Out of the corner of her eye, she catches his raised eyebrow across the table, a knowing smirk tugging at his lips. Then a sinfully deep voice joins the conversation as well. "In other words, you're neither studying nor working," he comments flatly.

"There are other things I do, of course." she feels her ear pinking as she sips her drink to control the verbal lashing that begs to come tumbling toward Mr.Raizada.

"Do share," he taunts in mock fascination. "What do you do, Miss Gupta? Besides collecting degrees just to keep them gathering dust, I mean." The table falls silent, not a good kind of silence.

"I'm sure, Miss Gupta will have a bright future. She is a brilliant girl and will do wonders to the society alongside her fiancé, Mr.Jha. They will be such an extraordinary couple," Mrs.Rastogi intervenes.

"Yeah, I'm sure, they will. So, tell us, Miss Gupta, what are you planning to do with that degree you get...with the money of the honourable tax payers of this country....besides indulging in hobbies and attending galas..." her eyes narrow as her fingers tightens around her glass, ".....or is it keeping the fashion industry afloat by purchasing enough clothes to dress half the country? If so, thank you in advance by the way, for investing in our business."

"I'm going to kill you, Mr.Raizada," she mutters silently clenching her teeth.

The poor lady, Mrs.Rastogi comes to damage control as she nervously adds, "The IT field has flourished in the last few years. I'm sure she'll find something to contribute to that. Bitiya, what are you planning to do next? Work, perhaps?"

Khushi hesitates, not sure how to respond to that question in front of everyone. Before she can find the right words, the infuriating man cuts through the conversation."Well, that depends, doesn't it?" His gaze flickering to her father and then Mr.Jha, before finally landing back on her. "I suppose certain permissions are required before any plans can move forward."

The words are casual, but the barb is clear. Her polite smile wavers just a fraction.

A particular clinking sound of curtilary draws her attention to Mr.Jha. His expression is calm, but his knuckles whiten around his fork. "Actually, that's not true. I'll let her to do anything she wants." Mr.Jha replies smoothly, his tone polite but edged with barely concealed irritation.

"You'll let her...." He quotes him and smirks leaning slightly forward , "...like I said, she needs your permission to do a job if she wants. Where's the equality in this again?"

"Khushi's future is important to all of us. We only want what's best for her. She has full autonomy to do whatever she wants to do." Mr.Jha says through gritted teeth.

Her eyes meeting the brown ones. His gaze is sharp, as though he's daring her to respond. But she remains silent.

"Oh, that's wonderful to hear, Mr.Jha. How reassuring it is to know that our future leaders practice what they preach! Supporting your fiancée in her career sets such an extraordinary example for the young generation of this country," the lady gushes on and on and on.

"Yes, thank you, Mrs.Rastogi," Mr.Jha responds politely, meanwhile shooting daggers across the table. "Empowering women is a central theme of my campaign. After all, charity does begin at......"

"Actually, Dad," Khushi cuts in with a slightly higher tone, turning fully toward her father, "I have been thinking of sharing this with you for a couple of days. I have an offer from a tech company. Paragon Tech.....I think, I'll consider that offer. What do you think? It's a good company, right?" She asks faking a bright, enthusiastic smile. It's an opening. She had to take this chance.

"Yes, it's a good company. You can work there if you wants, sweetheart." His father says before pursing his lips. "We'll always support her." her father continues, nodding at Mrs.Rastogi while brown-eyes looks like he’s just won the argument.

Everyone returns to their starters as the conversation dies down, but an urge lingers in the air. An urge to strike back.

"You know, Mr.Raizada," Mr.Jha starts with a casual tone. "I heard a very amusing story a few days ago... one of my bodyguards just mysteriously found himself unconscious in your presence."

And that infuriating smirk is back on his face as he wipes his mouth with a napkin. "My condolences. You need better security, Mr.Jha, with better skill to remain on their feet.....and better manners."

Mr.Jha’s jaw tightens, but before he can retort, Her father addresses the brown-eyed man across the table with a hard look. "Mr.Raizada, have you forgotten your manners at home?"

Something darker flickers in the caramel-brown orbs, "On the contrary, Mr.Gupta, I remember them quite well, much to your future disappointment."

She can feel both Mr.Jha and his father's rage toward the brown-eyes radiating off them in waves. And she’s sitting in the centre of these three men.

The servers gathering around the table help bring the tension down a few notches. Mr. and Mrs.Rastogi attempt to extinguish the brewing disaster by shifting the conversation to lighter topics, asking Mr.Jha about his political campaign and other matters.

And all this time, his eyes have been on her. Discreet this time, not very obvious.

She feels like burning from the inside out, and all he does is watch, his expression unreadable. It drives her mad, to the point she wants to scream, but instead, her voice comes out quieter as she responds to Mrs.Rastogi's other questions.

After a while, he leans in, his lips moving silently as he whispers something to Mr.Rathore. And then he leaves the table, leaving behind a empty chair in front of her.

The chair remains vacant when their main course is served, even through dessert.

Without his brown eyes all over her, she feels strangely empty too, just like the chair does.

And it’s a dangerous feeling.

A feeling that could ruin her.

Author's Note:

Thanks for reading! I’d love your feedback. Leave a comment!

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@arshifiesta @featheredclover @phuljari @jalebi-weds-bluetooth @chutkiandchotte @msbhagirathi @titaliya @shiyaravi

[kingmabry]

Morarji Desai, Prime Minister of India (March 1977 to July 1979), was President of Ramana Kendra, Delhi, 1968-70.

I had the privilege of seeing Ramana Maharshi in August 1935 in the hall in which he usually sat. He was sitting on a sofa and wore only a loincloth. I could see an aura on his face, which was glowing with peace and joy. I sat opposite to him but did not ask him anything. He too did not say anything to me. I sat just over an hour and just looked at his face. Till today I have not seen that aura, that joy or peace on anybody else’s face. That hour of perfect stillness in that silent presence has been a precious memory ever since.

While I sat there, no questions arose in my mind, nor did I feel any desire to ask anything. I was at complete peace with myself. It was this experience that convinced me that Ramana Maharshi had realized God or Truth. Some of his disciples who were present asked him some questions, which he answered. He, however, said nothing of his own accord.

I had to leave the place next day by train at about twelve. About an hour-and-a half before the time of departure, I approached Ramana Maharshi for permission to leave. He told me that I should go after I had eaten. We sat down for lunch along with the Maharshi, at about eleven O’clock. After lunch, I bowed down to him and left.

The visit left an abiding impression on me and convinced me that Ramana Maharshi was a realized soul and that the ideal of ‘action in inaction’ as propounded in the Gita is really attainable.

Presiding over the 99th Jayanti celebrations of Ramana Maharshi at Ramana Kendra, New Delhi, on 13th January 1979, Morarji Desai as Prime Minister, said:

The Maharshi seemed to know everything. He knew the language of the animals. He listened to their complaints. He treated every being in the same way, whether it was a cow or a dog, a crow or a monkey. All were equal in his eyes, the beggar and the millionaire. He never went out of Tiruvannamalai. He refused to go out and preach. He said, “If I am a jnani, I consider everybody else a jnani too. What is there to give?” He regarded everybody as himself. He made no attempt to convert anybody. One got transformed by his very presence.

Many civilizations have flourished and then disappeared. But in this country, you find our old culture and the ancient religion still alive. And it is this that keeps the country alive. It is persons like the Maharshi who keep it alive...All learning should come from within. That is the way the Maharshi showed. He did not criticize others way of life. He said, “Stick to your own religion and follow it properly.” Ramana Maharshi taught that one could do sadhana in one’s chosen way and reach the goal.

- Face to Face

[carionto]

Light the Fuse and Step Forth

At the Old Delhi Institute of Natural Science and Engineering, after a bit of a panic over a missing student who had merely went on an unannounced diving trip, Professor Iorvan Hal'Ahmat Garaamhan was having some trouble.

His life was boring.

He's 46, single, no kids, a cat, tenure, routine hobbies, and going bald. All his friends are about as boring as him. Except for Ruth, she usually gets the group together for an excursion to touch grass, but she volunteered to help establish a new branch of the institute in East Egypt over the next two years, and she's kind of the glue for their whole friend group.

Maybe he should take a vacation? But where... Earth is Earth - been there, done that; and he's not a fan of space travel either, too many weirdos up there, and really does not agree with all this moon cracking and harvesting business. Seeing footage of them smushing three moons together for that idiotic Death Kebab project really turned him off from all of that space and aliens nonsense.

Noticing a small notebook that had apparently fallen beneath one of the desks, he picked it up to see who it belonged to. It was an unassuming thing with no distinct markings on the outside. As he flipped the cover over, he saw it belonged to a freshmen named Cintra Valkeim, and was about to close it, but a strange line of symbols caught his eye.

"Professor? Is everything alright?" a voice suddenly interrupted his browsing. When did he get to the last page? When did he move closer to the window? Closing the notebook by impulse as he looked up at the voice, it was Cintra. She appeared a little nervous and worried. Putting his professional smile back on, he walked towards her and held out the notebook.

"I believe this is yours. I noticed it had fallen down. Be more careful next time, the cleaning drones don't check ownership themselves and simply dump anything they don't recognize as trash into the lost and found bin." he said as she took the notebook back.

"I will, thank you." She appeared to consider saying more, but closed her mouth and turned to briskly walk away.

Not thinking about it any more, Professor Garaamhan started to pack up his things and head out for lunch, when students for his next class, not due for another hour, started pouring in. Confused, he checked for the time and to his dismay found it had already been over an hour since the previous class ended. Did he really stand around for an hour, transfixed on

What was he doing for an hour?

He picked something up, then said goodbye to a student, but everything in between is hazy. Something was strange, and he didn't like it.

His stomach growled, and he didn't like that either.

Making an executive decision, he quickly scribbled an overly complex task meant for senior students, said anyone who correctly solves this gets extra credit, which immediately got almost all of the sophomores to shut up, sit down, and start working, then he walked off to have a meal.

The next day, as Iorvan was heading for the staff room, he noticed a strange light coming from beneath the closed door of an empty classroom. It was pulsating slightly, like a heartbeat. Without thinking, he put his hand on the handle, but froze before turning it open.

For the briefest of moments, every cell in his body screamed to not open the door. The fear that engulfed him dissipated just as quickly, as a student approached him with a question. They asked something, he answered, both said their goodbyes, and he could not remember what he was doing. Snapping back to reality, he went to the staff room and had a normal day.

That night, going through tomorrows assignments, a notebook with no markings seemed to appear in his stack of documents.

He opened it, noticed a student named Cintra Valkeim was the owner, looked at the scribbles on the side

He awoke in a hospital bed. He felt anemic. His eyes were burning, mouth parched, lips like sand, and a splitting headache made him wish somebody would knock him out cold.

A nurse rushed in as soon as the automated system informed the staff he was awake, delivered the painkillers, and gave him some water. She explained that they found him unconscious in his apartment after the institute and his friends failed to make contact with him for three days in a row. He had been sitting at his desk, and the muscle damage indicated he had remained almost unmoving for the entire time, but fully tensed up.

Three days? What was he doing? He couldn't remember anything out of the ordinary, and when the paramedic who arrived on the scene came by, what she described to him gave no impression of anything different either.

Over the next week, fellow staff, some students he had worked closely with on their thesis projects, and one of his friends came over to see how he is, what happened, etc. Nobody became wiser from any of this. Everything was normal.

After being discharged, he decided to not think too hard about the incident. The stress of a mundane existence got to him, is the explanation he went with.

As he went about his day back at the institute as normal, he walked by a empty classroom that had a strange pulsating light coming from beneath the closed door. He was about to open the door, but noticed he was holding an unassuming notebook in his hand.

"Open the door, please."

A young female voice spoke softly from behind.

He used his other hand to reach for the handle and opened the door and stepped forth into the light.

His world ended. The universe ended. Then it began.

Fast forward to the present.

He is underwater.

The pressure crushes him before he can recognize what is happening.

Then he is underwater again. Not crushed this time.

A voice that is not a voice, more like a decree from existence itself, embeds into his mind. His mind goes blank, and he dies, again.

Once more underwater. The voice is a voice this time.

L E A R N

is all Iorvan understands before passing out, once again.

He steps out of the dark empty classroom and greets Cintra, who was standing behind him earlier.

"I believe this is yours. Third time now, you really need to be more careful about leaving your things behind, Ms Valkeim." he gently reprimands her as she takes the notebook from him again.

"I promise I will, truly. Sorry, Professor Garaamhan. See you later!" are the last words out of her before rushing off to her next class.

Flipping through his own notebook, Iorvan jots down a series of impossible symbols as he walks down the hall to his own next lecture.

[related context]

[wormbraind]

wanna write an AU where aisha dies instead of alec (not necessarily in new Delhi btw). i feel like the fact that he was the one to die was appropriate and ultimately pushed aisha to do some good things but goddamnit i want to see my blorbo sufferi kind of wonder how he'd react since alec's natural response to trauma is to become even more dead inside. he probably wouldn't get much time to be upset before he became an emotional black hole

would be interesting if taylor looked at brian, very obviously grieving his sister, and then alec, who i figure is either deceptively chill or even more obnoxious but is certainly not displaying his emotions in the Proper Neurotypical Way so taylor just goes oh there's alec 'sociopath' vasil for you! never even really cared about aisha! alec would most definitely not make good decisions. i need more time to think about what bad decisions he would make and how it would go but this would be so fun to write (local man giggles and kicks his feet while writing about fifteen-year-old boy he relates to a little too much suffering)

little thing. maybe alec modifies his costume in honor of aisha. a more twisted mask and more grays maybe