#WHAT. WHAT. WHAT. WHAT. DAMIAN I LOVE YOU. DAMIAN FUCKING GET HIS ASS!!!
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Coffee addict Never sleeps Tim drake âÂ
Solving cases in his sleep off 87 energy drinks Tim Drake â
The coffee addict never sleeps perpetually tired Tim Drake thing is a widely accepted headcanon however that was elementary school tim but after he stayed up for a week straight subsisting entirely on coffee to decipher the bat weekly patrol schedule and how it aligns with rogue attacks/Arkham breakouts, he crashed then when he woke up it was fucking wednesday so he missed his chance to commemorate his discovery with pictures of Robin and he decided that shit would never happen again and made himself an âefficientâ sleep schedule so he could run around doing fuck shit, add to his robin shrine, and stay on honor roll bc he was even more pissed to see the gotham gazette had pictures of Robin with an on site interview credited to Vicki Vale (listen bowl cut tim had a one sided beef with vicki vale that included tim judging who gets better pics of the bats but she isnât even aware that sheâs competing with a whole ass child đ heâs sitting at the table with a mug of orange juice and looks at the newspaper snorts and goes âfucking amateur I could do betterâ)Â
Regularly unsupervised tiny businessman in training Tim âTen hours of uninterrupted sleep?? Thatâs so inefficient not to mention fucking stupidâ Drake is so pissed he missed getting shots of Robin dropkicking a rogue from 6 six stories up (for absolutely no reason dick just thinks itâs fun) that he just takes at least 3 hour naps every eight hours đ he refuses to spend almost half a day sleeping âfor no reason when he could be doing something productiveâÂ
And he still does this as a bat but itâs just easier to tell if he didnât take his nap bc he has less than zero impulse control and heâs just fucking done with everything like the gcpd is terrified bc timâs saying shit like âThis guys a fucking moron, I couldâve done this in half the time without killing anyone fucking loser doesnât he know if you keep them alive you can prolong the torture?â and âyouâre like all hysterical and for what 𤨠âyou blew up 83% of Bristol waahâ stfu and fucking rebuild it?? Itâs only rich mfs that live there, itâs just a matter of them opening their fucking walletsâ once a new recruit made the mistake of asking if robin had adult supervision regularly and Tim responded with âwell if youâre gonna snitch to cps like a little bitch then yeahâ and that cop did snitch so tim fucking doxxed him
Yj has just accepted that sometimes they will find tim in an air vent, on the roof, in one of their closets, or something just fucking knocked out then an alarm will go off and heâll just get up like nothing happened but for the first couple of months they were probably concerned bc âIâve never seen you sleep?? wtf are you on manâ and Timâs confused bc âI slept next to you this morning wdym??â and thatâs how yj discovers tim sleeps with his eyes open
But one of the worst things about Timâs âtime efficient sleep scheduleâ nonsense is that it fucking works heâs one of the most well rested and coherent bats even after back to back Arkham breakouts however the absolute worst thing about his sleep schedule is the likelihood of going into the cave and seeing tim staring in a daze but wide eyed yet somehow never blinking at the batcomputer with 57 tabs open on top of being unresponsive and thinking he has a fucking concussion or heâs been replaced but heâs just doing case work while muttering nonsense in his fucking sleep for some reason
#Tim drake being unhinged even in his sleep and taking sleepwalking to the next level by doing reports/solving cases in his sleep#A bat hearing incoherent mumbling but no oneâs nearby: đ heâs in the walls đ¨ heâs in the goddamn walls#No one knows how or why heâs in that particular spot in the wall bc thereâs isnât a secret entrance/crawl space there#Tim also has a wall of energy drinks Bruce regularly tries to lecture him aboot#And Timâs like âyour eldest son has snorted sugar MULTIPLE timesâ#then he gestures at Jason âand that one looks like if he didnât have drug related childhood trauma heâd try to snort protein powderâ#bruce: tim we have to talk about your behavior#Tim: like three of your kids have basked in the blood of their enemies 𤨠I am NOT your biggest issue rn#Dick Grayson being the main reason thereâs an âacceptable levels of forceâ slide with 600+ slides & most are examples of what not to do#Stephanie đ¤đž Damian: being reason Bruce is adding more slides to a PowerPoint from 2 decades ago#Tim drakes idea of straight forward is how everyone else imagines jumping through hoops and fucking struggling to avoid pissing off the fae#Like wdym simple?? This plan has 97 parts and heâs like no thatâs just the first page of plan 1 if itâs sunny#Rogues: I canât catch him off guard wtf do none of these mfs sleep??#Tim ânever let em know your next moveâ Drake whoâs been sleep for the past 45 minutes: đľâđľ#Yj has cuddle piles in the air vents#Everyone with enhanced senses is losing bc âthere are children in the wallsâ#Coffee addict babs calls tim weak when he tells her he cut coffee bc it was fucking with him before continuing to chug hot coffee#Oracle: this is the worst Tuesday ever đ I need more coffee before I deal with an Arkham breakout#Nightwing: but itâs sunday??#Spoiler: Maybe itâs time we switch to decaf love also just out of curiosity when was the last time you slept??#Oracle: you want the fucking location or not?#Dick: I take it back mb#Spoiler: a thousand apologies to our gracious overlord#Oracle: thatâs what I thought#Bruce: youâre benched oracle#Oracle: take that bench and shove it up your ass batman#Steph 100% calls everyone mushy pet names and has since Bruce lectured her about professionalism when she was dating tim#Imagine getting your ass kicked by a sleepingwalking middle schooler#Or worse: imagine having to explain to your insurance company that a sleepwalking child blew up your home#tim drake is a menace
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Batfamily fans are annoying because they hate Bruce, Batdad fans are annoying because they woobify or reduce Bruce, neither of them give a shit about the villains as the secondary main characters, nor Gotham as any atmospheric or thematic weight other than âbackdrop city,â the main comic titles currently are catering so heavily to the weekly Twitter discourse itâs actually a real fucking problem, etc etc.
And then meanwhile Iâm over here defending The Dark Knight Returns and trying to figure out what the hell to do with my realization I donât give a fuck about Dick as Nightwing.
#If I had the gumption or the care to be more of an essay writer about Batman#Iâd take a crack at trying to express how constantly reducing Robin to Batmanâs CHILD is actually a littleâŚ#like yes he was Dickâs guardian#and yes he legally adopted Jason#and Tim#Damianâs his biological son etc etc#but the child fantasy of Robin is just as much being Batmanâs best FRIEND as it is getting to drive the Batmobile as a 10-year-old#Robin and Batman are partners and theyâre best fucking friends#and yes itâs a grown ass man treating a kid as his equal#because itâs FUN. and itâs fun best contrasted with the villains being the most HORRID fuckinâ people you have ever seen#just as Bruce/Batman needs to be a harmony between terrifying violence and unrelenting compassion#Batman and Robin need to be a balance of absolutely childâs logic and ultimate good vs Very Fuggin Scary evil#evil thatâs Very Fuggin Scary and then meanwhile death traps and fights on giant memorabilia#and Iâve got wider issues with the ever expanding Batfamily#but I think reducing Bruce to this hyper anxious love lug of a Dad backing cookies for everybody as a defense against Batjerk takes#and what have you#is equally⌠not it.#Iâm in a Batman mood ignore me.
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I think more people need to play around with Damian's speech. Don't get me wrong, I love the antiquated Victorian child style of speech, but also he's a teenager that swears plenty in the comics. We really need more scenes like:
Damian: Father, I regret to inform you that I have been assigned in-school suspension for the next three days.
Bruce: What, why?!
Damian: My classmate Kevin was disparaging a female classmate for turning him down, so I called him 'a rizz-less, basic-ass neckbeard bitch' and said I was going to fuck his mom and give her a son she'd actually love.
Bruce: *is completely speechless*
Damian: That is all I needed to tell you. If you will excuse me, I have homework to complete before dinner and patrol.
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My favorite thing about the bats is that⌠they are gothamites. And sure they scare the shit out of people⌠but they are in Gotham. Superman is loved by his people, Flash is adored, people pray to Wonder Woman, Green Arrow is feared. But the Bats? The Bats are like all of Gotham's weird older brothers/sisters/parents. Superman and Green Lantern are visiting Batman in Gotham and all of a sudden he gets smacked in the face by a banana and they turn and find a group of teens skateboarding away and one kid calls over his shoulder âeat the fucking potassium you absolute brick.â and Batman doesn't even do anything. Barry is chilling with Nightwing when a girl runs beneath the building they are sitting on and screams âNice ass Night! But get it the fuck down here, my cats stuck in a tree.â And Nightwing does a flip off the building and just?? helps her?? Wonder Woman and Black Canary are passing through Crime Alley on their way to the Batcave and spot Red Hood standing in an alley, being lectured by a woman who is half his size and she ends the lecture by throwing two sandwiches at his face and walking away. Red Hood just takes his hood off and starts eating. Superboy is helping Red Robin defeat Scarecrow and while theyâre hiding, waiting for him to walk into their trap, RR is casually conversing with a Gothamite about Hogwarts Houses, and when he says the Gothamite looks like a Gryfindor he pops his head out and screams âYo scarecrow hes right fucking here!â Jâonn is heading to the Manor to discuss League business with Bruce when he spots Robin(Damian) fighting Riddler all alone and is about to intervene when three teenagers show up and just fucking deck him instead. Damian doesn't thank them, just glowers, and one of the guys goes âyou're welcome you fucking brat.â And the girl even smacks the back of his head and goes âmanners.â Clark is sent to go find Tim and Steph and Damian and finds them at this girls birthday party, in full costume, eating cupcakes and drinking punch, jumping on the bouncy house and is like âerrr, B-Batman needs you home.â And as one the entire birthday party group went âFuck Batman.â Spoiler was spotted painting these guys nails, Black Bat was seen teaching calculus to a group of teenagers, Batgirl(Babs) was running after a group of kids screaming âGive me back my laptop you fucks!â Just- just the batfamily and Gothamites being annoying to each other and appreciative yet bitches.Â
Bus driver: stop getting thrown at my fucking bus, i got places to be and my insurance only covers so many shatter windshields and person sized dents Batman: I don't really control where I get thrown Bus Driver: well you better fucking start otherwise theres gonna be another fucking villain on these streets *drives away and almost runs him over* Superman: *gaping* yo-you're just gonna let him do that? Batman: *shrugs* Gotham insurance aint what its cracked up to be Superman: *staring dumbly*
#gothamites and batfamily are like thisđ¤#they hate each other but love each other#one big happy fucked up family#batfam#batman#batman and robin#bruce wayne#batfamily#gothamites#only in gotham
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Would they or would they not catch youâŚ
Dick: yes. 100% yes but heâs -no pun intended- a little bit of a teasing dick about it.
He will catch you but then act as though heâs going to drop you by loosening his grip, making you scream out of surprise and cling onto him tighter, all the while beaming that bright and beautiful smile of his as though he wasnât about to willingly let you fall flat on your ass on multiple occasions.
âI fucking hate you!â You whined, smacking Dick on the bicep.
âOh do you now?â Dick inquires as he slowly begins to losses his grip on you, smirking.
âDid I say hate you? I meant love you, a lot! Please donât drop me.â You cried as you tightened your grip on his neck whilst struggling to keep your feet from touching the floor. âAwww I love you too gorgeous.â Dick coos as he pressed kisses into your face as you could only glare at the cheeky bastard.
You hate him sometimes but you werenât going to complain about the affection you were being given. So you guess youâll suffer for now.
Side note: he might even try and see if you can catch him. đ
Jason: He will catch you but makes it a big deal whenever he can. He loves holding you in his arms.
He could keep you in his arms forever if he could but knew that he canât, so he settles for going about his day carrying you throughout the apartment instead.
âYou can put down any day now.â Youâd tell him but that only makes Jason tighten his grip on you as he moved in his makeshift library for a book to read.
âNo.â He simply replied, scouring the many book titles in front of him in the hopes that one might speak to him. You pout. âWhat do you mean no?â Jason then looks at you and says. âNo means no. As in no I will not put you down because I do as I like and will not be told otherwise, so the cutie currently in my arms has to deal with it.â He then smiles as he presses a kiss to your forehead before looking back towards the bookshelves.
You end up falling asleep in his arms and Jason couldnât help but smile at how cute you were, even if you did look like the living dead.
Damian: says no but will in fact catch you without hesitation.
However if you do try to tease him about it, then he will drop you without a second thought. âYou can catch yourself next time.â He would say as he walks away, leaving you with a bruised ass. Titus -who saw the whole thing- would come up to you to make sure you werenât genuinely hurt and encourage you to get up by nudging you with his head.
Donât test him because he will do it and then act like the whole thing didnât happen if you were to bring it up.
âDick.â Youâd say as you stood up.
âI heard that.â Heâd call back, his voice echoing off the walls. âYou were meant to.â You reply. âAnd at least Titus came to check up on me to see if I wasnât hurt.â Youâd add while scratching Titus behind the ear.
Needless to say you were more cautious when choosing Damian to catch you. However he does apologise for dropping you on your ass by gifting you something he himself drew by hand; He secretly doesnât like it when youâre upset with him and will do anything to rectify it.
What a sweetheart.
Bruce: heâs too use to you pulling this type of shit that itâs basically muscle memory for him to catch you as youâre running towards him, all with a straight face mind you.
Be grateful because he risked a much needed bowl of Mulligatawny soup just to catch you in his arms, but then again the kisses you bombard his cheek is more than reward enough, a small almost missable smile appears on his lips as he then proceeds to carry you for the rest of the day as âpunishment.â
( this only occurs when Bruce is feeling particularly affectionate or playful)
Much to your batkids -Dick, Jason, Tim, Damian, Duke, Cass and Steph- dismay. Theyâd want to use this as blackmail, but they know that it will backfire as youâll probably hang the photo on a wall somewhere in the manor, reminding them of how disgustingly their parents can be when given the opportunity.
#dc imagine#dc x reader#dc x you#dc fanfic#dc fic#dc comics x reader#dc fluff#dc fanfiction#jason todd imagine#jason todd fluff#jason todd x reader#jason todd imagines#jason todd fanfiction#dick grayson x you#dick grayson imagine#dick grayson imagines#dick grayson x reader#dick grayson fluff#damian wayne x you#damian wayne imagine#damian wayne x reader#damian wayne imagines#damian wayne fluff#bruce wayne x you#bruce wayne fluff#bruce wayne x reader#bruce wayne imagine#bruce wayne fanfiction#nightwing x you#nightwing fluff
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Damian meets Dani about... oh, a few weeks after he's found out his brother was alive and living somewhere in America, and... lets say a week after he's met Samantha Manson. After that gala, it doesn't take much prodding and stalking to find out that Mansons live in Amity Park, Illinois. And if that's where Samantha was, then that's where Danyal was.
Stalking Manson's social media -- of which required a little bit of hacking as she kept her account private -- to see if there were any pictures of his brother was only slightly helpful. Most of her pictures were either scenic shots of Amity Park, photos of posters and signs of her environmental protests, fundraisers, and other such activities. The photos that did include Danyal were all carefully cropped out or angled to avoid showing his face.
The most recent photo was one of Manson at what appeared to be a gym, sitting in front of a mirror with another brown-skinned boy leaning against her. They all looked like they were coming down from exercising, Manson and the other boy -- Foley, as the tag said -- were both sitting on the ground. But the third boy, Danyal, was laying down, the angle prevented the camera from seeing most of his face and body, and what could have been seen was covered by Danyal's arm that he'd thrown over his face.
Unfortunately, as easy as it would be to take a plane down to Amity Park and hunt down his brother for answers, that would cause more problems than it would solve. Father made it explicitly clear after they'd returned from the gala and found out where the Mansons resided that they were to wait.
"If Danyal finds out that we know he's alive, he will likely try and run." Father told them, sitting at the chair in front of the Batcomputer, Amity Park's page pulled up. "He's spent the last five years in what has been, essentially, deep cover. He will not react well to finding out it's been blown."
(Damian had wanted to argue -- he's waited long enough. He wants to know what his brother's real feelings on him are. He wants to know why Danyal decided to leave the League himself. It had been a decision between Danyal and Damian over who would fake their death, and Danyal had chosen to leave. He wants answers.)
(But, Father's been quieter since the reveal of Danyal's existence was brought to him, and the memory is still fresh in Damian's mind of Father approaching him after the fight and quietly asking him why he hadn't told him about Danyal.)
(It was hard to read his face with the mask on, but the line in his shoulders, the pinch of his mouth -- Father was hurt and trying not to show it. Guilt still bubbles up in Damian's chest at the recall.)
(He feels even worse remembering his response -- rolling his shoulders back and telling Father, his stomach churning: "I thought it pointless to inform you of a son that was already dead." He didn't want his Father to mourn a child he never met, and... Damian didn't want Father to wish it was Danyal here instead of him.)
So, waiting for their plan of attack to finally be initialized, Damian allows Richard to drag him down to Gotham's mall. To get out of the house and do something else.
And it's there that he meets Danielle Fenton. Really, how unexpected. He's in the middle of conversation with Richard when she, well, bumps into him. Its not a huge bump, neither of them go to the ground nor do they drop anything, but she whirls around in utter apology while Damian is already forming an insult on the tip of his tongue.
"Oh geez, sorry! I didn't see you--" Ellie makes eye contact with him, and her voice cuts off, but her jaw stays dropped. Damian can't say he's of the same expression, but he is of similar sentiment. Brown skin only a few shades lighter than his own, black hair, glacier blue eyes that Damian has only ever seen on two people. And, as both of their eyes flick up to each other's brows, the death knell.
Father has a very unique set of facial features -- specifically, the strange shape of his eyebrows. It feels ridiculous to say aloud, but the 'batwing' shape of his brows means that anyone who knows about the Waynes would, reliably, be able to recognize them within minutes.
And this girl had them, just as Father did, just as Danyal did, and just as Damian does. She also shared an uncanny likeness to Danyal, and to mother.
Damian's hands immediately go to a dagger at his hip.
At the same time, the girl makes a strange squawking sound - like she's just had a revelation. And immediately she's jabbing a finger at Damian's face, her other hand slamming over her mouth to smother her annoying, staccato shrieking.
"You!" She squeaks, hopping in place with sparkling blue eyes. She looks around frantically, and Dick tenses up in Damian's peripherals -- likely seconds away from dragging the girl away from the crowd.
The girl laughs, giggly and excited, and lands her eyes back on him. There is an expression of awe on her face as she drops her hand from her mouth, she leans her face close to his, grinning from ear to ear. "You! You're Danny's brother!"
Damian's attention sharpens. She knows Danyal -- she looks like Danyal. She knows Danyal.
The girl couldn't be more than a few years older than Damian, but younger than 15 -- the age Danyal should be right now. She claps her hands together excitedly. "Holy cow!" She breathes, and audibly inhales, "Look at you! Wow! I thought you were a mini-Danny for a moment. But then I realized your eyes were green and you don't have his scar."
She's tilting her head side to side, looking over him like a specimen to be studied. Automatically, Damian is scowling, leaning away from her in annoyance.
That only seems to delight her more, and she laughs again. "You even have his scowl! Amazing!" She exclaims, and long-driven instinct forces Damian to ruffle up in offense, how dare she compare him--
The girl juts her hand out for a handshake, grinning from ear-to-ear. "I'm Dani with an i, but you can also just call me Ellie if it's too confusing." She waits patiently for Damian to give her his hand, and he tamps down his annoyance to reluctantly take it. Dani shakes it hard.
"You know, Danny's told me about you a few times -- never your name, no, he's always calling you starlight. It's incredible how he can share details while also keeping all the important bits out."
'He calls you starlight.'
Dani speaks quickly, excitably, like a child on a sugar rush or a teenager meeting her favorite author. She steamrolls through her sentences like she didn't just hit Damian with a sledgehammer to the chest. It's the second time he's heard someone claim that they've been told about him under a pseudonym, under the same pseudonym.
He's at a loss for words, and Richard steps in with a hearty chuckle and a hand on his shoulder. "Woah," he says, cutting off Dani with a warm smile, "I think we should probably talk about this sitting down, yes?"
Yes, Damian thinks, blinking at Dani, let's pause this for a moment. He needs a moment to breathe.
Dani blinks, and then nods, smiling back easily. "Right, good idea! I know a good spot." Then she turns and bounds into the crowd of other shoppers, and only then does Damian realize that Dani was without a chaperone.
They quickly follow after her, and perhaps if they were anyone else, they would have lost her in the crowd. The ease she moves between people makes Damian wonder about her origins -- obviously she is a clone of Danyal. The eyes, the name, the similarities are all too convenient to ignore.
However, who made her was the question. She was far too bubbly to be made by the League, and the fact that she knows Danyal and was even within speaking terms of him implied that whoever made her was within close range of him as well. Perhaps even knew him, to some level.
Most people who made clones did not do so with good intent, but the fact that Danyal told this clone about Damian meant they were close on some level. Dani likely defected then? Similarly to Superboy. Did she have powers? Did she know of the League?
She's sitting at a table in the food court when they finally catch up with her, and she looks a little sheepish as they draw up their chairs. "Sorry," she says as they sit down, smiling nervously, "I totally forgot to make sure you guys were following me."
Not a lie, Damian thinks, eyeing her up and down as he lowers into his seat beside Richard. He sniffs curtly, hiding only some of his annoyance. "It's fine. We found you, didn't we?"
Dani nods,her mouth twitching into a more relaxed smile. "You did! Yeah, wow." She stifles a round of awed giggling. "Sorry, sorry-- it's just so weird to actually meet you in person. The way Danny talked about you made it sound like he was never gonna see you again, so I kinda thought the same."
...Ah. Right. Because he faked his death without any intention of reveaing that it was fake in the first place. The squeeze of Damian's chest is unexpected and throbbing, like someone put a weight on his sternum in an effort to crush his lungs. In his chair, Richard's arms flexed and unflexed subtly.
"Well..." Damian pressed his lips together, "I am here now. It is interesting to meet you, Dani." He says, he can't say nice, the jury is still out on that one. But it is interesting. Placing his elbows on the table, he leans forward. "Are you Danyal's clone?"
Immediately Richard swats him lightly in the arm with a hiss of his name, while Dani's eyes widen comically at him. However, instead of getting defensive or even fleeing, Dani grins widely. "I am, actually. No point in denying it, right? But you haven't given me your name, Danny's brother."
Damian tamps down an instinctive twitch, a trained negative response to being Danyal's anything. He nods shortly. "My name is Damian, this is my... brother, Richard." He gestures to Richard, and ignores the grin he gets burning into his temples.
"You can call me Dick, Dani." Richard says, leaning over the table to shake Dani's hand. Dani nods, an eyebrow raised amusedly. When Richard lets go, his smile carefully falters, and he feigns looking around. "Are you alone?"
Dani's eyes bug for a moment, and her smile turns strained. "Ah, my -uh, guardian is actually in another store right now. I texted them, they'll meet me here when they're done."
Lie, Damian thinks, and shares a knowing look with Richard. She's alone -- a foolish thing to be for children, especially in Gotham. If there's one thing Damian knows for certain, it's that Danyal would not allow any clone of his to wander around inept or incompetent. Especially when he is supposed to be dead.
He likely allowed Dani to live because she was not only a girl, but had something that prevented her from being easy to defeat or capture. He doesn't see anywhere where she could be concealing a weapon -- so powers, perhaps? A meta Al Ghul would be a useful asset to anyone, if she had no weapons, then powers were the next potential option.
He turns back to Dani, "I see. Can you tell me more about Danyal? It has been a long, long time since I last saw him. I am... curious to see if he's the same as I remember him."
Dani's expression falls flat and deadpan, the illusion only ruined by the toying of her mouth and the amused glimmering of her eyes. "By that do you mean if he's still a stubborn stick-in-the-mud with a mean streak a mile wide, and a weird propensity for breaking out into shakespeare when he's pissed?"
Damian stares at her. "...Yes."
The girl sighs dramatically and slumps against the table, pressing her cheek into the cold metal with her face all scrunched up. "Then yeeesss!" She whines, "I love Danny, I do. He can be a big prickly teddybear sometimes, but oh ancients, I will always hold our first meeting against him for as long as I live."
An eyebrow crawls up Damian's forehead - both at Dani's description of his brother, and the mention of their 'first meeting'. Dick sits up in his peripherals, an equally intrigued look on his face.
"How did you guys first meet?" He asks, barely bothering to hide his interest.
Propping her head up on her chin, Dani remains deadpan -- and perhaps a little pouty -- "Ehh... I claimed to be his third cousin once removed." Automatically, Damian presses his mouth into a line. She was avoiding answering the question in full. "He didn't really... take it that well."
Damian can understand why. Father's earlier explanation brings itself back to the forefront of his mind -- Danyal would not react well to finding out his death was uncovered. If Dani claimed to be related to him, then it is a miracle she was still even alive. Had it been Damian, he would have killed her on the spot.
"Yes," he hums, "I can understand why."
Dani scrunches her nose up, and eyes him warily, "Yeah, don't think I didn't see you grabbing your side earlier." She says, ignoring how Damian stiffens up faintly. "I've learned my lesson."
They fall into almost comfortable conversation after that - trading questions and answers back and forth. Dani, short for Danielle, was in Gotham to explore. She was nearly a year old, and she wanted to see the world before settling down and doing anything concrete.
Danielle asks Damian what he was doing in Gotham, Danny said they lived overseas. Damian tells her that he lives here, and she perks up and asks if he was put into foster care too.
He nearly ruffles with offense -- no, he was living with their Father. He nearly says as such -- only for a hand on his back to stop him. Richard sends him a warning look, and Damian is very vividly recalling just that weekend with Manson.
(He is still wondering how his brother managed to reach Gotham so quickly, because that was his brother. He might not have been able to see his face, but that voice was his.)
Manson was furious with them over something, furious enough that she refused him information on his brother. Enough that she was petty to hang up the phone with Damian's brother without ever even uttering a word to him of who she was talking to.
Damian looks Danielle and lies, and tells her yes, he was also put into foster care. Richard backs him up.
Danielle is a well of information on his brother -- more so than any of Manson's social media was. Despite her explorations, she's still naive -- or, at least, naive to Danyal's situation. With Richard's help it's all too easy to get her to tell them about Danyal.
He learns that Danyal was interested in astronomy. Whenever Dani visited it was like he had new facts to tell her. He learns that his brother listens to goth rock, and was particularly a fan of a band called Dumpty Humpty. Something that Damian was certainly not expecting his brother to be interested, of all things.
And, perhaps the most important piece of information of all, Danielle pulls out her phone with little prompting and shows him a recent photo of his brother. Damian prevents himself from stealing it out of her hands, forcing himself into carefully taking it with permission and showing it to Richard.
It was a simple selfie of the two of them in a park somewhere. Danyal was crouched down beside her, and while Danielle was beaming into the camera, Danyal simply wore a half-tilted, awkward smile. He was in a red muscle-tee, the last thing Damian could imagine his brother wearing.
There wasn't much to put it, Danyal was simply older. With wavy black hair framing his face and his glacier blue eyes, there was no doubt about it that he was an Al Ghul and and Wayne. The scar he's had for as long as Damian can remember -- the one he gained from protecting Damian merely a week into his birth -- split diagonally down his face. It's shrunken more with age -- well, not shrunken. Danyal merely grew.
He had old, familiar scars down his arms. Ones he gained from training. But there were ones Damian doesn't recognize -- a pinkish one near his upper shoulder that looks new. Another laceration on his other arm that still had its stitches. An ugly, mottled wound as if someone had stabbed him with a blunt object.
There was a cut on his throat, healed but certainly not years old, as if someone had meant to slit his neck and missed it's mark. His brother has been in battles, in fights, and they are recent.
Damian stares at it silently. His tongue locked to the roof of his mouth, unable to formulate a sound. He never really knew his brother in the League, he was not allowed to -- not by Grandfather, not by Mother, and encouraged by Danyal. He is a stranger to him. Damian is sick of it.
Danyal and Danielle look more like siblings than he and Damian ever did.
He looks up at the girl, and finds his voice. "Can I have this?"
Danielle is all too happy to give it to him, typing her number into his phone. It's the first message she sends him. Richard leans over Damian's shoulder with a smile, "Would you be willing to send us anything you've got on, uh, Danny?"
Danielle beams at him, looking incredibly touched, "Of course! I can give your number to Danny the next time I see him, if you'd like."
That's right, Damian realizes with white hot panic, to get these photos she has to see him in person. He can't know I know he's alive. He jolts his head up, eyes wide. "No!" He exclaims. Danielle reels back, looking surprised.
"No." Damian repeats, forcing his voice to remain calm despite still feeling panicked. "No, not yet."
"Oh." Danielle simply says, her brows furrow together. She looks like a lost fawn. It's incredibly strange to see on a face that holds Al Ghul blood. "Uh... why?"
Yes, why? Damian can't seem to come up with an excuse.
But Richard can, always a lifesaver. He wraps an arm around the back of Damian's chair. "We recently found out Danny lives in Amity Park, our family was hoping to go visit him as a surprise." He lies, easy as breathing. And it's hardly even a lie. Just the truth re-worded. Damian nods shortly.
Danielle believes it, hook, line, and sinker. She grins widely, near-impishly. She smiles so much. It is equally as strange. "That's so sweet! Okay! I won't say anything, promise." She swears, and Richard feigns a slump of relief. "Dan's pretty good at sniffing out lies, so don't tell me anything about it. The less I know, the better."
Richard nods, smiling warmly and gratefully. "That'd be great. Thank you, Dani."
Danielle and Danyal's meeting... very, very quickly goes very sour from, basically, the moment Danny steps into his room and finds Ellie sitting on his bed (strike one) and reading the comic books Tucker introduced him to (strike two). By the time she's looked up to address him, Danny has the door locked, and a hand hovering near the knife hidden under his shirt.
She gets her third strike when Danny, in a voice that could make the mountains tremble, demands to know how she got into his room, and she lies (with uncertainty of her decision growing in her chest) that Jazz let her in. Danny's hand shifts closer to his weapon, and he turns towards her fully, and says that Jazz would never let someone he didnât know into his room, and who was she.
(Vlad Masters had underprepared Danielle for her meeting with Danny -- not out of any completely direct malicious intent, but he failed to mention just how... 'touchy' Daniel could be -- he failed to mention the scars littering up his arms, unhidden by the hoodie tee he meets Ellie in. He failed to mention that along with those scars, that Danny was visibly lean, capable of doing very real damage without the use of his powers.)
(He tells Ellie that heâs adopted, and that he is observant and clever, but ungrateful and has a bad attitude.)
Her final strike occurs when Ellie, trying to keep her facade of cheeriness, tells him that sheâs his third cousin once removed. Immediately, Danny has his dagger pulled out, and Ellie finds herself with the cold metal of a blade pressing against her throat.
Danyal 'A.G' Fenton hasnât killed since he arrived in Amity Park. At first it was because mother told him to keep a low profile, and killing would do the opposite of that. But, he's been slowly learning from his sister and friends over the years the value of human life. So it's become a combination of keeping his head down, and also that life has value to it.
But. That doesnât mean he canât kill, nor is he opposed to doing it if the situation calls for it. It just means that he doesn't do it. And âDanielleâ is an unknown in his room, claiming to be family to him, and appearing uncannily similar to him and his family. Either someone hired her and she was trying to pass herself off as a relative to him because that someone realized Danny was the biggest threat, or, his false death has been compromised, his mother was unable to tell him, and the league was aware he was alive.
No matter how he looks at it, this Danielle was a threat to him, his sister, his friends, to Damian, and to the Drs. Fenton. Danyal Fenton doesn't kill, but he has no problems doing so.
(Ellie, pinned under Dannyâs knee and the blade to her neck, is too terrified to think of phasing out of his hold. Not that it would help, he would just chase after her.)
âYou have broken into my home, dared to lie to my face, and when I demanded to know the truth, you dared lie to me again." Danny's scowl could cower even Skulker, his glacier blue eyes burning. "Your continual breath has been a favor from me, that I have graciously allowed, from the moment you entered my room, dahkil."
"So I will ask one more time," he hisses, "who. are. you."
Danielle, only a few months old, unprepared for the ice storm that is "Daniel" Fenton, and his clone in only flesh and blood, and not memories, immediately breaks. And tells him that she was his clone, that Vlad sent her to come capture him, and to please not kill her.
Danny's face twists with anger, Ellie thinks he's going to kill her anyways. Instead, he withdraws his knife and gets off her, stringing out curses in Arabic as he sheathes his weapon back into its hiding place faster than Ellie can blink.
He switches to English as she is collecting her bearings (and contemplating fleeing), and Danny paces the room like a tiger in a cage. "--of course that wretched, arrogant, peacocking little ingrate would do something so infuriating. I should have driven my sword into the shrivel of his heart when I had the chance--"
Ellie, for a moment, thinks of leaving while he is distracted. And starts to slowly creep away. But Danny notices instantly, and whirls on her. His too-bright eyes bore into her head: "Where do you think you're going."
"...I'm leaving."
And Danny scoffs at her, "Why? So you can fly back to Masters and tell him that you failed to capture me, and that I know that he cloned me?" He says, and Ellie remains silent -- that's exactly what she was going to do. "He will destroy you within seconds."
Of course, Ellie rears back in offense, and she finds the footing to glare at him. "He would not! He's my dad, he loves me!"
Danny gets in her face, glowering back with an equal intensity. "He does not." He snaps, "Vlad Masters has not a soul in his body nor a heart in his chest. He would sooner cut off the hand that helps him stand, than to take it along with him."
"If you're really made of my blood, then I will teach you only this: we bow not our heads nor our hearts to anyone." Danny's too-blue eyes narrow, and his voice dips into a hiss, "Especially not to a conniving snake like Masters. Your heart: cut it off, or cut it out. He will sooner leave you to bleed."
Then, he unlocks the door and drags her out before she has much time to act. And as he drags her down the hall he shoots Sam and Tucker a text, and they meet up at Nasty Burger. Ellie is a spitfire, but Danny has her too intimidated to leave.
"This is Danielle," he tells them bluntly as he corners her into the booth, "she's my clone. Masters created her."
Ellie is with them for a week, and somehow throughout that time, Danny manages to actually get her to like him throughout that time. He's callous, blunt, and full of sharp edges that you can cut yourself on. But when he's not spitting venom, he's fretting.
When he drags her back to the house after being with Sam and Tucker, he pulls her to Jazz's room and opens the door to tell her the same thing. "This is Danielle." He says upon abruptly opening the door, interrupting Jazz's studying as he pulls Ellie inside. "She is my clone, Masters created her. She needs clothes."
Then he turns and leaves, shutting the door behind him. Ellie, in that moment, thinks that now's her chance to flee. But Jazz then squeals, and she is trapped in new arms, shaken around by Jazz Fenton, excited for a sister.
(Ellie finds herself complaining to Jazz that night, shoved into old pajamas. She's in utter disbelief that Jazz could care about a jerk like Danny.)
("He's rough around the edges, but Danny does care." Jazz tells her, combing through her hair with her fingers. "We've been working on it ever since he joined the family, but Danny warms up slowly. He's usually less stoney; I think your arrival spooked him.")
("Spooked him?" Ellie repeats, she doesn't believe it at all. "He has a funny way of showing it, he threatened to kill me!" And she turns around just in time to see Jazz's press her lips into a line.)
("He's... very protective. He'll deny if you ask him, but he worries a lot." Jazz's fingers find her hair again. "What I do know for certain though, is that he wouldn't have kept you here if he wasn't worried about you at least a little bit.")
(Ellie doubts it.)
But Ellie is indeed there for a week, and the day after her initially rocky introduction with Danny, he is a little bit kinder to her. Still kinda a bitch, but he's less harsh to her, if... almost uncomfortable around her. Flighty, kinda.
Whenever she gets mouthy at him though, he looks oddly smug about it and, infuriatingly enough, praises her attitude. He is very, very annoying. And still kinda terrifying. But hearing him shout insults via puns at someone during a ghost fight that happens that week lessens the intimidating factor,,, a little bit.
Things go about,,,, relatively,,,, similar to canon. In the sense that it ends with Ellie defecting from Vlad because she finds out that Danny was right and that Vlad didn't actually care about her. (And that Jazz had been right too; Danny, in his weird, mean way, had been worried about her as well)
Danny looks out of his depth as she talks about how he was right, and he cuts her off with a vaguely uncomfortable clearing of his throat. And gives her the most awkward, but genuine apology he can muster.
"I should've used more tact when telling you about Masters, and I... apologize for threatening you when we met. I was..." he makes a face like he's sucked on a particularly sour lemon, "worried. First about my family, and then later about you."
(Ellie will be damned: Jazz was right)
Before Ellie leaves, Danny puts a hand on her shoulder and tells her: "I wasn't kidding about what I said to you when we first met: you are of my blood, and as such, you do not bow your head nor your heart to anyone."
Ellie looks at him, thinks about the last week, and smiles like she's caught him in a trap. "What about Sam and Tucker then? And Jazz?"
Danny smiles, it's awkward and tilted, like his face isn't used to the gesture. "We bow not our hearts, but that doesn't mean we can't share."
#dpxdc#dp x dc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#danyal al ghul au#WOW WOOPS THAT WAS LONGER THAN EXPECTED#and i even got everything that i wanted into it! Damian getting Dani's number was a surprise though#not included: damian and co also stalked tucker's SMS and found jack shit on danny too bc danny told them he doesnt like posting his face o#the internet. so they don't post his face. danny also has a social media account but its sparsely used and any photos taken are scenic shot#or are photos promoting events. there aint a single selfie on there yall#his account is @djfenton on instagram and anything else is @sneakahead which is an inside joke between his friends and him#not included and cut: dani saying she was alone and when one of them points out how that's unsafe she laughs and tells them#'it only is if i get caught! and good luck catching me'#damian was not meant to end this interaction with more info on his brother but oops Danny's total vagueness on his situation#is coming back to bite him in the ass unintentionally - ellie doesn't know you're hiding and she recognized your brother! oops!#dick is the âniceâ one but he is also a manipulative fuck just like the rest of his siblings. everyone say thank you dick for being able#to lure people into a false sense of security and get what you want that way. love ellie but she's canonically naive so im using that to my#advantage babeyyy#the waynes are fantASTIC liars and actors and manipulators.
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Batboys when their unaffectionate best friend texts them âI love youâ out of no where.
Tw: suicide mentions but not done. Reader is gender neutral.
Dick
As soon as he got that text, he either felt happy you started to be affectionate or he felt worried as you never really texted him that. He goes to text you âare you okay?â
And if you donât answer heâs leaving work and going to your house. His anxiety is eating his stomach alive when he reached your house, he opens them with the spare keys you gave him.
You were just watching tv when you turned at him confused. âDick?â Immediately dick hugs you, tightly. Now youâre concerned . âDick?â You said again, worried. âI was worriedâŚthought something happened to you.â He stays at your home until he gets called back to work.
Jason
Just try and do the same shit to him like dick. Donât answer him? This manâs pulling up to your house immediately when you said âI love you.â Scared that maybe someone who knows him and wants to hurt Jason is after you.
He knows you, more than you know yourself. Literally heâs already at your window banging on it, cursing himself when you donât open it he goes and bust the window open wide. He can pay for it, donât worry.
As he stalks around the house holding his gun, he sees you standing in the kitchen holding a knife. This big ass fridge of a man just grabs the knife out of your hand. You scream shocked before seeing it was just Jason.
âWhat..were you doing?âŚâ he asked firmly. You scoff and grabbed the knife, well tried to as you explained yourself. âI was gonna cut onions before you came in Jay..â you said pointing to the onions Jason had clearly hadnât seen due to adrenaline.
âOh. Well love ya too, ima go now. Iâll see you in the morning.â Jason says leaving, that was before he turned around. âOh yeah and UhmâŚyour window is broken.â Jason leaves quickly as you gasp and go check your bedroom window. âJASONNNN!!â You yelled in anger.ďżź
Tim
Itâs late at night, he on his computer doing a report when all he sees on his phone is an âI love youâ text from the most unexpected friend ever, you. Immediately Tim is getting up, calling you as he gets dressed to go to your house.
Heâs scared, âpick up, pick up, pick up.â You donât answer. âFuck!â Tim hangs up and calls again. He knows you had some thoughts of suicidal tendencies, but heâs been by you in your darkest days. So when you just text him that, he doesnât realize heâs crying when he finally reaches your house.
Heâs using a spare key he secretly copied off of your own home key, donât ask. Itâs for procedures like this if you are in danger.
Anyways he immediately screaming your name, if you donât answer immediately as he screams your name. Heâs gonna run up to your room.
But if you immediately yell back his name, heâs running towards your voice. You were in your room relaxing when you see a tired and scared Tim rush at you into a hug. Crying softly as he holds you tight.
âYouâre okay right? Why didnât you answer my calls?!â He says immediately. âMy phone died when I texted youâŚâ Tim immediately stopped crying just to give you a âwtfâ face. ââŚ.are you serious.â Tim had forgotten that you had a terrible habit of having your phone dead at times.
âYeah.â â..just for this night scare. Iâm sleeping here.â Tim says, his body soon gave out easily. Making his heavy body fall on your smaller frame. âTim! Tim! Get up dude..Iâm sorry!? Damnnit!!!â
Damian
The moment that text got sent, it takes him 6 minutes to get to your house. Quietly like the damn ex assassin he is.
His expression and face are hardened holding a katana, broâs lip in sunken in as he looks around your house. âI donât know what games you are playing. But itâs not funny L/N.â He says as he then sits on your bed. Katana flat on his lap staring at you intensely. âWhat, I canât say I love you to my best friend.â Damianâs glare hardened. âYou can, I was just surprised when you texted me those 'words'. Seemed unlikely of you to say that so I had to come to make sure you were secured.â
You deadpanned at the tanned boy in-front of you. âOkay fine, I just wanted to say it incase you felt like you didnâââ âI know you love me, and I âŚlove you too. Now that I know you are okay, I must go.â He says quickly. Looking away to hide his slight flustered face, he lifts up your window sill and jumps out the window. You walk over to see the boy is immediately gone.
#dc fluff#dc x male reader#dc comics x reader#damian wayne#damian al ghul x male reader#damian wayne x male reader#dc x reader#dc imagine#damian wayne x reader#damian wayne x you#jason todd x male reader#jason todd x reader#jason todd#tim drake x you#tim drake x fem!reader#tim drake x male reader#tim drake x reader#dick grayson fluff#dick grayson x male reader#dick grayson x you#dick grayson x reader#dick grayson#dick grayson x female!reader#batboys x y/n#batboys x male reader#batboys x reader#batboys fluff#batboys#jason todd x fem!reader#tim drake
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why now? (again &. again chapter excerpt)
ft. yandere! damian wayne x kidnapped! reader
read until the end for an author's note. slight spoilers below.
"damian, tell me, why now?"
why now? you question that to yourself more often than you would want to. why now, instead of the past 13 and a half years when you were a nobody to the family? why now, when you had finally learned to love yourself and let go? why now, when you were finally out of their arms.
"huh...?"
your youngest brother snaps out of his focus on painting a canvas of you, body turning to your direction, curiousity peeping in his eyes. he acts like whatever you had said was bewildering, but you know he knows what your question meant, he doesn't need a repeat of your statement because damian is a no-bullshit brotherâ he simply wants to hear your voice.
his eyes used to look at you with contempt and disgust. you'd rather that than the current gaze of adoration from your brother, who now stares at your form seated on a papasan chair, now his muse for his current painting.
"why now, damian? why is it now that all of you guys are suddenly interested in me?" you repeat; exasperation, disdain, apprehension, all an amalgation of emotions in your tone. if he wants to play stupid, then fine, as long as you get what you want in the end.
you continued mumbling, voice echoing inside the room-turned-atelier. "last i checked, you were intent on murdering me just 'cause you hated me."
it was a quip, truly, a mere tease to his past actions. you didn't know just how much your statement offends him, eyebrowns furrowing as his gaze seems to harden.
it took him seconds to fully register what you had said. you wished you were quick enough to take those seconds to your advantage to bolt out of the room, to run away, but you can't.
"(name)," he sighs, standing up from his chair and easing his way to your seated form. you stand, too, not wanting to back out of what seems to be a forming argument.
he may be shorter than you by an inch or five, but you didn't want to admit just how much smaller he makes you feel.
"i have never told you i hated you." he says, as if it is a matter of fact, but you couldn't bring yourself to believe him, to believe what he wants you to hear. the wringing in your ears provides you the slightest bit of solace, but it wasn't enough to distract you from the words that come out of his mouth, words that contradict his past actions towards you.
"i may have injured you in multiple occasions, said hurtful things beyond redemptionâ for that i am deeply sorry for treating you, my older sibling, that way. but my intent to hurt you in the past never stemmed from hatred. i have never hated you, (name), and i do not have any reason to hate you."
you didn't know whether he was trying to convince you, or himself. you don't know how to feel, you don't want to feel anymore. fuck, you regret even talking to him in the first place. you feel so trapped, like you were in a dead end of a maze. you want to get out but you can't.
you didn't even know just how much you were heaving, tears welling in your eyes as you shiver; all the lies you had fed to yourself now biting you back in the ass.
you expected him to shift the conversation to something else, anything else, or even tell you to sit the fuck down so he could return to painting you.
what you didn't expect was, was his sudden turn of actions as his arms locked you in an embrace, his head nuzzling your chest as he pouts, head turning up, eyes gazing at you fondly like you meant the world. like he never once hurt you with his words and with his actions.
'push him away,' your mind tells you, but your heart clenches, beating erratically as if it was screaming at you to not let go.
you hate this. you hate that you feel conflicted, appalled at yourself for even fucking reciprocating his hug. it scorches you, you hate everything, you hate that you had always wanted this. you hate yourself for tearing up, hand shakily finding itself on his head, running through his hair.
you hate how warm you feel, how your chest aches at his affection, how both your grip on each other were strong as iron. how damian nuzzles deeper into the embrace, how he feels so vulnerable in your arms.
"why now, you ask? you always wanted this, right, (name)?" his words were muffled by your clothes, but you couldn't drown his voice out even if you want to. god, you wish you never asked him anything.
he continued, pretending as if you weren't choking on your own predicament, "dick was always the most experienced, tim the smartest even if i do not wish to admit it..."
he drawls on, listing every traits of your family, relishing in the thumps of your heart.
"âbut you..." he stares at you deeply, fingers dig deep into your skin. but it doesn't scar you, not anymore.
"you are the most emotional... my older sibling, the one who got away. you're finally back..."
damian makes a show of tightening his grip, the space between the two of you near to nonexistent.
you had every strength to push him away, to send him tumbling to the floor unexpectedly. but he was always stronger than you, damian was always one step ahead of you. you're too tired to fight back, you want more. you need for him to let go butâ
he has you in his arms.
you don't know how much time has passed.
"... i miss you and i love you, (name)."
reblogs and interactions are encouraged and appreciated.
a/n: 974 words. inspired by this panel. sorry for the delay for the new chapter so i'm giving you guys this erm, i was experiencing massive writer's block and mood swings (and a bit of imposter syndrome when it came to my writing). this is a drabble for a future chapter (not the next one) where they had already kidnapped you. damian is one manipulative fucker and writing contradicting feelings hurts my brain lmao !!
#đˇ... yael's works#đ§... yael's misc.#series: again & again#yandere dc#yandere batfam#yandere damian wayne#yandere damian wayne x reader#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x gn reader#yandere x male reader#yandere x you#yandere x y/n#platonic yandere#theres times where i cant write at all and times where i can write smth good enough đ
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The Wayne manor is not a quiet place.
Someone Is always doing something, talking about anything, teasing, bantering, playfully slandering, so Bruce grew accustomed to noise. Its hard not to, with his nest of birds.
But this particular topic has him on mute;
"Why do YOU get him when he's old?"
" Oh my GOD, Jason, I'm LITERALLY the oldest. You ALWAYS have to get everything!"
Jason isn't at all interested in Dick's dramatics. He wraps all 6'4 inches around Bruce's leg like an affectionate leech. "You're the fucking meanest! You'll probably feed B those gross ass protein shakes and force him to watch re runs of Realest Housewives of Gotham!"
"YOU TRIED TO BLOW HIM UP!"
Cass is strong like a tsunami and silent as a snake, jumping on Bruce's back, beautiful eyes full of threat. " Dad stays. Mine."
Bruce pipes up, " I have a retirement plan--"
"Getting railed everyday at the Kent farm isn't a retirement!"
Tim gives Steph a look of disgust. "Gross."
Damian isn't above pulling out his swords. " If I don't get Baba, everyone is dying. Me included. "
"Damian. What did I say about threatening your siblings with murder?" Bruce asks expectantly.
" Oh, I'm not threatening, baba. I'm making a vow."
Alfred doesn't pry his attention from the chamomile tea he's preparing. " Master Bruce stays with me."
"...Alfred, I don't think you'll...You know, be around when Bruce retires--"
"Was that a contradiction?"
They all gulp. The argument is settled quickly, and Bruce spends the rest of his evening with head on Alfred's lap and his hand in Jason's hair, petting like a cat, and listening to RHOG on the TV.
He loves the noise.
#bruce wayne#dick grayson#jason todd#damian wayne#batfamily#do NOT bring up gotham war okay?? idc#alfred pennyworth#batdad#dc comics#soft bruce wayne#battinson#hes so <33#text#text post#writing
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dick had bruce as a partner. there was a mentorship there yes, but at the end of the day dick & bruce were a team.
jason had bruce as a father. bruce took him and made the extra effort. he actually adopted jay and stayed home when jason was sick.
tim had bruce as a liability.
tim went to bruce- bruce never found him. i just really love the idea that because of the difference in dynamic, tim is one of the few people who can shame bruce into compliance so easily.
dick and bruce will get into shouting matches that neither one of them walk away from being satisfied, bruce is an unmovable object and dick is an unstoppable force. when they meet, its not pretty and there is almost always collateral damage.
jason and bruce are like setting off two firecrackers next to each other when they fight. it's loud, it's bright, but it burns off fast. the anger and righteous fury is there one moment but then gone the next.
tim and bruce fight differently, because a lot of the time, tim understands where bruce is coming from. he saw bruce start on his path to self destruction and managed to get him to switch tracks. bruce was never the same after jason's death (what parent is after seeing their child die) but batman was able to correct himself. after stepping into the role of robin, tim understood. he too lost so many people he cared about because of the weight of the cape he wore.
and i think the first time that damian and bruce go head to head, dick may be the one who comforts damian and assures him of his place in the family, but tim is the one who goes to bruce. it's the first time bruce has ever seen tim this angry. tim is seething with a fury that would put the devil himself to shame. he is so angry that he is shaking and bruce can the restraint that tim is using to keep the discussion from becoming physical. tim tells bruce, or rather lectures him, in all the ways that he has fucked up with dick ('kicking him out, never officially adopting him, forcing him to go through with the spyral mission- you treat him as your partner when its convenient but the moment it's not he is your soldier again. its unfair bruce. he's more of a man, more of a father than you have ever been'), with jason ('do i even need to say it? actually, let me address it. you cannot see the forest past the trees. jason isn't who he was before he died. he never will be. same as you. he lost a lot more than his life when the joker blew him up. he lost his innocence, he lost his faith in you. i'm starting to think he may have been right') and with himself ('i love you bruce. i have always cared so deeply about you and your mission. it's why i came to dick in the first place. but this isn't about me.').
and bruce remembers why his relationship with tim is so different. tim trained overseas, tim got to patrol on his own as robin so much sooner than his other boys did. tim was largely unsupervised during his run with the young justice. tim had made up an entire fake uncle to keep his indepence. tim would never argue with bruce about himself in this way, but he would argue about- ('this is about damian. and i swear to god bruce. if you can't pull that stick out of your ass and find a way to apologize to damian that leaves him feeling properly taken care of. superman himself wouldn't be enough to save you from my wrath.')
and it's only later, after bruce does apologize to damian in a way that leaves dick speechless. when barbra happened upon the cave's security footage that she shares with dick who shares with steph who shares with jason that his family figures out just how fitting of a last name that drake is for tim.
#guilt tripper tim drake#tim drake#dick grayson#bruce wayne#jason todd#batfamily#batman#dc comics#robin#red robin#damian wayne#damian is tims little brother#as god as my witness he would do anything for that boy#manipulative tim drake#angry tim drake
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Tim with hannaki disease
spending his childhood choking on flowers
Barely able to breathe rejection after rejection
Jason is attacking him at the tower and he canât stop coughing out flowers
when dick gives Damian Robin, Tim leaves the cave spitting out petals
imagine if he died of suffocation during the Bruce quest
Fuck. I love hanahaki disease.
Tw: death, blood, asphyxiation, fictional disease, dead body description, gore
For those of y'all unaware, it's a completely fictional disease where having unrequited love results in the person growing flowers in their chest. It's usually romantic, but I prefer the platonic versons (especially child-parent angst, holy fuck).
I've seen two types of hanahaki:
The love is actually unrequited
The person only perceives the love as being unrequited
Either way, the progression is as follows:
Person coughs up one petal
They start coughing up more and usually blood
They cough up an entire blossom
They die trying to cough up the entire flower (blossom and stem)
There are four outcomes to hanahaki disease, depending on what rules you are working with:
Love becomes requited
Person dies
They have a surgery to remove their ability to have feelings
They lose (voluntarily or not) their memories about their unrequited love
Some people play with flower meanings of the petals being coughed up. I fucking love those versions so much.
Let's get into the AU! The timeline is mine to fuck around with, so excuse any non-canon progressions.
~~~~
Tim has chronic hanahaki disease from his parents. They visit often enough to quell the worst symptoms and mitigate the damage, but they don't stick around enough (or show enough constant attention) for the petals to go away.
Janet once asked Tim if he'd like to get the surgery. Tim said no. Janet respected that choice and never asked again even though Tim was like nine at the time. It also becomes a fear of his. He wakes up in cold sweat at the phantom idea of just not being able to love anyone. It terrifies him, even if the feeling of asphyxiation is the only other option.
When Janet dies and Tim becomes Robin, he does his best to hide his condition from Bruce. It worsens, from the way Tim adores and loves the Bats, but Tim manages.
It's a rough few years, but slowly, the ice begins to melt. The Waynes show Tim more and more affection. YJ also shower him in so much care to the point that Tim has days of uninterrupted breathing.
It's a novel but welcome feeling.
Jack waking up from the coma complicates shit. His condition worsens again, but it's manageable.
Until Tim's sixteenth birthday.
The teen will never admit, but that test nearly fucking killed him. Bruce never finds out how close he was to killing his Robin, but Tim knows. He'll never forget how thorns scraped along his throat at the idea that he can't trust anyone. He'll never rid himself of the intimate knowledge of how blossoms taste in his mouth and the sickly sweet smell of blood mixed with flower petals.
Tim has to quit Robin, for his safety, health, and as a "fuck you" to Bruce, but realizes he can't keep in contact with Dick, Alfred, or Barbara without it. He can't contact his team.
He has to go back, so he does.
Tim's not sure if it's better or worse that Bruce didn't know about the hanahaki. If the man did, would he still have done the test? Due to him never showing remorse or guilt for his actions, the teen doesn't know.
The question pesters him even when his dad finds out about Robin.
It plagues him through Steph becoming Robin and dying.
It festers into his bones when, while wearing those same damn colors, he hears his father die.
That is one or many reasons "Uncle Eddie" was created.
Tim can't quite trust Bruce, but he finds himself still loving the father-like figure in his life. He finds himself forgiving him. He leans into the hair ruffles, shoulder pats, and gruff words of affection. He lets himself be loved.
Then, an undead asshole in a gleaming red bucket comes to kick Tim's ass. The teen can't help but laugh at the way his life bounces between breathing and dying at the drop of a hat.
He's just barely able to hide the flowers from both Red Hood and the Titans.
A little assassin appears, and each attack brings a petal.
Each new death hampers Tim's ability to breathe. Tim tries, but it's so fucking hard. How is he supposed to live without them?
With the ticklish scrape of petals, Tim doesn't think he's supposed to.
Bruce isn't dead. Tim knows, with every fiber of his being, that Bruce can't be dead. Tim won't survive if he is.
Even if Tim loses everything, even if these damn fucking flowers consume him, at least his death will have a purpose.
That's what he tells himself as he lies in a pool of blood beneath the stars. The sand at his back is soft in comparison to the stem piercing his throat and tongue. The sound of his choking is joined by the bubbling wheezing of Pru.
Ra's peers down at the body already set with rigor mortis. Tim's jaw is pried apart by a bouquet of yellow carnations dripping in blood.
The demon head hums at the sight, a dangerous gleam to his eyes. With the flick of a hand, two assassins grab the young detective's corpse. The other three bodies are taken as well.
Tim's eyes fling open as the teen gasps for air.
It's wrong. It's wrong. It's all wrong. He's empty.
He's surrounded in green.
Oh fuck.
For awhile, Tim just soaks in the soft expansion of his lungs. He marvels at their capability.
He can't remember a time when he's been able to breathe so easily. It's enchanting and allots the teen a giddy sort of relief.
Through the destruction of both the Spiders and the LoA, he finds himself taking small moments to just breathe. It's a simple joy he can't help but partake in.
Tim logically knows there's a price. His breaths cost him, though he doesn't know their price. He should be dead and buried within the flowers.
He is neither.
He is alive. He is free (from the petals. It takes him a little bit to become free of Ra's).
Tim brushes aside these valid and alarming concerns to focus on his goals: escape, take down Ra's, and derail whatever retaliation occurs.
So that's what Tim does. He ignores the insistent sense of wrongness and focuses on the task at hand. He coordinates his friends and family. He faces down Ra's. He gets kicked out of a window.
With a grim smile, his body goes lax and his eyes flutter shut
He's done.
When Tim springs up from unconsciousness, Steph's voice reassures him he's safe. She tells him he's in the batcave.
The tension to bleeds from his body as Damian mutters a demand. Tim's eyes dart from Robin to Batgirl to Batman (Dick) to Alfred.
That sinking feeling of wrongness returns.
Dick's eyes are trained on the teen as he asks Tim, "How did you know I'll be there to save you?"
It's obvious the man is worried. It's obvious he's so fucking glad he caught his younger brother.
The lie falls from Tim's lips as smooth as any truth, "You're my brother, Dick. You'll always be there for me."
Dick's face brightens with fond relief.
Tim watches. He observes the reactions of his older brother. He catalogs the effect of his words on the man he's admired and loved for thirteen years.
He notes all of this.
And he feels nothing.
#tim drake#thank you for the ask!!!!#dc au#I'm not editing this so have fun ~#also yellow carnations represent: disdain & disappointment & rejection#i know there are a ton of plot holes just ignore them
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Yandere Batfam x Camp half-blood (Neglected reader)
DC x Pjo
Part 2
______________
"why can't my parent just claim me? My human parent doesn't like me, and now you're telling me there's a chance my godly parent might not even care about me at all?" You huff kicking a rock while walking to the dining pavilion
Annabeth's eyes fill with sympathy "You never know, maybe they're just busy"
"busy my ass... I've heard that excuse so many times before" you sit down at the Hermes table, where all the unwanted children sit
"So (Name), are you going to be a year round student or just for the summer, because we're gonna need Mr.D to sign you in" Travis Stoll one of the head counselors says to you
You think about it for a while, you saw how other children treated each other like family, how there was a director who loves the children as his own, you could find your place here, it doesn't matter if you have parents, you could find your family, just as everyone else in this camp did
"I-" then you stop, you mind going back to the Manor, how you left the hallways burning, and now you're missing, are they worried? Do they want to find you? What if they think you set the house on fire? Would you even have a home to return to?
It's not like you were as loved as Jason who could just die and come back
This set your decision, you are never going back to that cold mansion, you are never going to sleep in a silent room, here, you could build a life for yourself
"I'd like to stay year round" you say
"well that settles it, I'll explain the rules to you later 'kay?" He says
The infamous Mr.D seemingly groaned, you're pretty sure you heard him mumbling "another fucking kid"
___________________
Two days have passed, you feel like the happiest kid on earth
Annabeth is doing this thing where she's trying to help you find your godly parent, you couldn't care less(or could you?), but listen-
Yesterday you just shot 25 consecutive bullseyes and you've never felt so amazing, everyone was clapping their hands and we're praising you, and everyone was saying you were a natural at farming, sword fighting was one you enjoyed, you know a thing or two about combat so you gained respect from the other campers
But even after all those achievements, no one came to claim you
Now you're trying blacksmithing, you loved all the things you did but... The weapons were kinda ugly, every sword in the weaponry looked the same, only special kids get customized swords, so you were kinda hoping to make your own custom weapons and stuff, I mean no parent is gonna give it to you
"Hello!" You smile at the busy forgers, they acknowledge and some nod and some smile back
____________________
Tim looks at CCTV cameras, his eyes wide and in disbelief
A random woman, who somehow broke into the Manor, with a flamethrower, burned a hallway down
He saw this kid, well his little sibling, but I don't think it's appropriate to call you that, you ran crying for help- well you weren't crying for help exactly but you were screaming, you were seen running for your life away from this madwoman
whom he'll safely assume is one of his father's ex lovers or some villain that decided to get back at him
The problem was you.
No sign of you at all
Batman had everyone patrolling, Bruce Wayne reported you missing, a prize reward given to the one who'll find you dead or alive (alive hopefully)
There was this image he couldn't get out of his mind
In the middle of trying to salvage what could be saved in that fire... He spotted a family picture, a picture where everyone was still visible- and only your face had been burned off
He tried to help with the search, thinking about where you could go, what you could do, but he couldn't
He didn't know how you acted or how you'd decide
He knew nothing about you, and so did the others, it was like you were already dead before it was even confirmed
Damian walked in the room "you're still here? Dad already got the JL to help with search, quit trying to show them up"
"I just don't get it, she ran to the garden, but she wasn't there- could there be other villains waiting in the garden and took her? I don't know-"
The demon spawn scoffed "Anyways dad wants you to send the CCTV footage to JL, they said they'll analyze it or something"
Tim was doubtful, it's not like anyone there could spot what he couldn't, he was very observant (of everyone but (name) apparently)
____________________
Sorry it took a long time for me to update đ, it was pt week and I had a lot of projects
But I wonder who could possibly be (name)'s godly parent?and who could spot what Tim couldn't?
@bat1212 @jisnothere @erikasurfer @nathaly36
#dc universe#dcu#percy jackon and the olympians#percy jackson#percy pjo#yandere batfam#yandere platonic#yandere#dc comics#percy series#warmyanderepjoxdc
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keeping up with the Wayne's pt.2
Bruce avoids the cameras at all time:
Cameraman: Why is your father always avoiding cameras? why don't we see him more often?
Dick: oh well you know Bruce, he's a very old man, always getting lost in his own home
Bruce:..
---------
Damian: do you like animals?
Jason: no. he just wants to start drama
Damian: .
Jason: Damian..?
Damian proceeds to pull out a 6 inch sword and attacks Jason with it:
they cut the cameras after Tim got involved..
----
Jason in the car with the camera pointed at him: You know, when there's drama people love to be like "this is my relationship I don't need to involve people" well in this family you do
-------
Tim: I don't need dick be so fucking annoying with a stick up his ass like he runs this shit because he doesn't
Dick just walks out of the manor slamming the door shut
-----
Jason: I don't know what a Jeff koons is
Bruce: he's famous for the balloon dog
Jason: oh..thats..
Bruce: you, you need to go to like a art class
Jason just sitting there:
---
Cass: I just looked at my brother and he looks fucking insane
Camera cuts to Dick wearing his 'sparkly' Nightwing costume:
Cass: see..
#batfamily#tim drake#batfam#jason todd#batkids#damian wayne#bruce wayne#tim and jason#batfam shenanigans#batman#dick grayson#dick and jason#tim drake is a menace#cassandra cain
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dcxdp chat prompt?
Danny: You can de-escalate literally any situation by asking âare we about to kiss?â
Danny: Doesn't work with getting out of speeding tickets, though.
Damian: ...How do you know that? And why are you speaking as if you've done it multiple times already..?
Danny: ...Shit
____________________________________
Damian: Iâve been dropping them the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. No response.
Danny: Wow. They sound stupid.
Damian: But theyâre not. Theyâre really smart actually. Just dense.
Danny: Maybe you need to be more obvious? Like, I donât know⌠âHey! I love you!â
Damian: I guess youâre right. Hey Danny, I love you.
Danny: See! Just say that!
Damian: Holy fucking shit.
Danny: If that flies over their head then, sorry Damian, but they're too dumb for you.
Damian: Danny.
____________________________________
Bruce: Jason, you need to calm down.
Jason, slamming their fists on the table: BUT HOW CAN IT BE "BIRTHDAY CAKE" FLAVOR IF A BIRTHDAY CAKE CAN BE ANY FLAVOR?!
____________________________________
Dick: What are you drinking?
Jason: Vodka.
Dick: Straight?
Jason: No, gay. Why?
____________________________________
Damian , about Danny: Can I tell them they look nice?
Dick: Sure.
Damian: Can I tell them I respect them?
Dick: Maybe, if they ask.
Damian: Should I show them an oil painting I made of us surrounded by our three cats and four dogs?
Dick: ...
Dick: Iâd save that for later.
____________________________________
Tim: Hey, what have you two been up to?
Dick: We were helping Bruce write his vows, but he kicked us out because Jason was making inappropriate suggestions.
Jason: How is âSelina, I love your sweet assâ inappropriate?
____________________________________
Steph: You don't need my blessing to go kiss Bernard. In fact, I was pretty sure you were already kissing Bernard!
Tim: Nope.
Steph: In that case, as the archbishop of Tim's fully awakened gaydom, I give you my blessing to immediately leave and rectify that as soon as possible! Go now, my child, and kiss Bernard right on the lips!!!
____________________________________
Tim: I can't imagine what Jason is planning. But I can tell you two things. We won't like it and it won't be legal.
#incorrect quotes#incorrect quotations#quotes#dc#batfam#dcxdp#dc x dp#dpxdc#dp x dc#bruce x selina#timbern#tim x bernard#deadseriousship#deadserious ship#deadserious#dead serious#dead serious ship
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Yandere Batfam x Neglected, but Defiant Reader
What's Next?
Warning(s): Yandere themes, past neglect, a lot of swearing, stealing, violence, mentions of bribery
(This is where now you can pick your own choices in this series, so this isn't technically a chapter)
~~~~~
Two weeks went by quickly, thank God.
You arrived at school as how you could have if it wasn't for Bruce ruining your fucking break by making you spend time with the rest of the family.
You were forced to watch movies that made no sense due to its plot or whatever and went shopping, only for them to buy you things that you didn't like that all. Like, who still buys and wears things that could cause a whole closet clutter.
The worst part of all this is that Damian has to walk you everywhere around the school, except for using the restroom. Even worse is that Bruce changed your entire schedule to you having teachers who love to fuck you over. Because of this, you can't skip anymore!
Anyway, the day quickly went by, and now it was break time. As you two walked into the cafeteria, you spot your two basically only normal and only friends, Noelle and Sasha.
"(name)! There you are...-"
Noelle calls out to you before her smile slowly flattered when she spots Damian beside you.
"What is he doing here?"
She whispers to you that made you roll your eyes.
This made Damian narrow his eyes down at the two of them.
"Do you have a problem with me being here?"
He asks with a snarl that made your friends cringe a bit.
"(name)..."
Sasha mutters out to you that made you sigh.
"No, no... Damian, they're cool, don't worry."
You reassure him that luckily made him calm down.
"Oh, alright then. Come now, sister. We need to find a table."
Damian tells you which made you feel annoyed.
"Oh, uh, actually. I need to get my water bottle. I left it in my locker, so..."
You try to make an excuse to get out of here.
"No worries, I can go get it for you."
Damian said as he turns around.
"Wait, you don't know my combination!"
You call out of realization.
"I'll figure it out."
He calls back as he leaves the cafeteria.
You and your friends stayed where you were in silence.
"Isn't this great?"
You speak up out of sarcastically as you sit down with them.
"(name), what are you doing with that guy?"
Sasha asks as she takes a bite of her pudding.
"Being stuck by his side for the whole day and the entire Christmas break?"
"No, why are you hanging out with him?"
"Oh, god, don't be a bitch over this. I know he's such a pain in the ass, but I can tolerate him, okay?"
"No, we're not jealous or anything, he's actually fucking insane, (name)!"
Noelle tells you
"Insane like how?"
You ask as you cross your arms.
"Sent many guys to the infirmary, punched a guy in the throat earlier, nearly set a teacher's car on fire."
Noelle said as she started to list down all the things that Damian did.
"Wait, so all of this happened in one day?"
You ask with your eyes wide a little.
"Yeah."
"How do you know all of this?"
"I have two classes and a passing period with him."
At that moment, a guy with a neck cast walked up to your table.
"Were you guys just talking to Damian?"
He asks the three of you.
"Yeah."
Sasha mutters out.
"I hate him. He literally punched me in the throat during gym and didn't even apologize to me or get expelled. I'm pretty sure he paid off the headmaster or something."
He said with his eyes furrowed that meant he was pissed.
"See?"
Noelle mutters to you.
"Hold on, why did he exactly punch you for?"
You ask out of curiosity.
"Cause I said that you were pretty hot and told him that he was a wimp about it or something."
He said as he rubs his cast.
"Still sound normal to you?"
Noelle asks you.
"Oh, come on. That's like one of the things that's like the less worse things."
You tell her.
"'Less worse'?! I was passed out for like half an hour!"
The guy said in a defensive tone.
"Dude, that sounds like a you problem."
You tell him with a bored expression.
"Oh... Shit hurts."
Sasha said with a chuckle.
"Fuck you, guys... Stupid bitches..."
The guy mutters out as he walks away from you and your friends.
"Anyway, what can I do about all of this?"
You ask as you place your chin on the palm of your hand.
"Honestly, I don't know. You're pretty much on your own, (name)."
Noelle said as she takes a sip of her honey milk.
"What? You guys aren't going to help me?"
"We want to, but we don't know how."
"Please? Like actually, please. I have no idea what to do and I don't even know how to get away from all this."
You tell your friends in a slight pleading tone.
Noelle and Sasha gave each other a glance before they stare back at you.
"Okay, fine. As much as we don't know either, we'll try whatever we can, okay?"
Sasha said as she sets her pudding cup down.
"What are you exactly going to do now, (name)?"
Noelle asks in a soft tone with a soft gaze on her face
~~~~~
Go to your next class (Coming soon)
Skip until the end of the day with your friends (Coming soon)
Go home with your friends
â˘
â˘
â˘
Taglist: @somebodyrandom-613 @delias-stuff @endism @ragdol-666 @snowy-violet @sleepydhanie @missikkj @k1ttys-w0rld @box-of-kinderjoy @thetreefairypersonalblog @thelibraryofdeez @animegoddess15 @lilyalone @seraph101 @lain3iwakura @tacodeemon @whiterabbitxxx @yuyuzi-ling @lilithquillete @amisupposedtomakesenserightnow @una1002289 @spacetravelr @luckyangelballoon @illytian @ghostdoodlen @imaginarydreams @flyingpansaurus @wrenbirde @kimzzz18 @ohnoivefallen @ferakillia @f1lover4ever @asahi20789 @livingforloves @moonieper @rosecentury @waitingforanarchicaddiction @missmannequin @mischiefmanaged124 @hanselate @doli09 @chocolatemoose26 @enjisthings @stitchtheseconde @purple-lemon-8 @milliu @blublock404 @kimzzz18 @jsprien213 @bluemidnightmelodies @enter-sandmann @tdickensstuff4 @couldeatthatgirlforlunch @starsdotalk @sumikosasaki @erikasurfer @h0rr0r-10ver-69 @0lshadyl0
(If you want to be in the taglist, let me know!)
#yandere#yandere batfam#yandere batfamily#batfam#batfamily#yandere x reader#yandere platonic#neglected reader#platonic#yandere dc
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As someone who grew up with 5 older brothers, I cannot help but think of how older-brother-coded both Dick Grayson and Jason Todd are.
(A/N: Itâs not that I donât love Tim and Damian also, they just give off more younger brother vibes to me. Also, I tried to make this as gender neutral as possible, please donât hate me if itâs not.)
CW: None, slight cursing.
So I proudly introduce as my first ever post:
Annoying Older Brother!Dick Grayson and Jason Todd Headcannons:
Batfam x gn!reader
Yâall ever come home from school excited for the leftovers that youâve thought about all day and FIND THEM GONE?!?! Jason ate them. Just to spite you. And he wonât even play dumb about it either. He will admit it so carelessly.
âDid you put your name on it?â Heâll shrug with confidence. He gives no fucks. He needs that caloric intake.
Jason is that sibling who youâll argue with until youâre blue in the face and then text you 20min later with no explanation, just: âfood?â. (Said argument was probably about the leftovers btw).
And youâll still go get food with him because, well, siblings.
Dick is an older brother in the way heâs not even the tiniest bit nonchalant. He will 100% tell the cringiest stories about you in front of anyone you bring home. Unapologetically.
Or drop you off at school with the most EMBARRASSING song blasting from the speakers. He lives for it.
Another thing about Jason? He will absolutely barge into your room, flex in your mirror, knock shit off of your dresser, throw something at you, and then leave. Completely unprovoked.
He probably even steals the current book youâre reading from your nightstand.
It will return a day later out of nowhere.
Imagine just chilling on the couch, scrolling on your phone and suddenly youâre bombarded with their presence.ďżź
âIs that a *boy/girl* youâre texting?â Jason will ask as he looks over your shoulder, knowing damn well itâs not.
But guess what? Denying it would just make it worse.
And of course, Dick would freak out.
Because why would his younger sibling be dating? Youâre way too young; practically a baby in his eyes.
In the case that youâre actually talking up your latest crush, Jason would have the following reaction:
âI donât give a damn who you date,â But give him ten minutes and heâll hit you with the classic, âso whatâs this kidâs name again?â He will be looking them up later.
I think Jason would try to be the brother who acts like he doesnât care but would most definitely be over your shoulder 24/7 about a lot of things. Dating being one of them.
One time, my brothers shoved me into a box, taped it shut and then set me on the front porch. These two shitheads would do thatâ or something similar, like hanging you upside down from a grappling hookâ and say, âIt builds character.â
Ohhhh, that reminds me. You think the two of them are annoying individually. Think of them both TOGETHER.
You try to avoid being around the both of them at any given time, but itâs inevitable.
Like picture yourself coming home after fighting some D-list villain like Condiment Kingâ because of course everyone else was busyâ hoping that no one else is back from patrol.
But no! No, no, no. Why would the world ever want you to be so lucky?
In front of the Batcomputer sits Dick and Jason, there to witness your arrival in your mustard-and-mayonnaise-covered suit. Dick will at least attempt to hide the smile behind his hand.
Jason openly laughs his ass off. Tears will be brushed from his eyes as you glare at his shameless reaction.
âWell, I hope you were able to ketchup to him,â Dick cracks with a grin.
The sound of their laughter follows you as you retreat to the locker room, middle finger raised in their direction.
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