#WE NEED MORE ANGRY AND AGGRESSIVE FEMALE CHARACTERS!! i love when female characters are bitches

[xpoolboy]

oh your angry, aggressive, calculating male character? yeah i made him a girl now. no she's happier like this trust me

[daydreams-to-passages]

So I found this little snip bit in my docs and figured I share. It's clunky at best and can feel a bit odd since it's an isaki.

Anyways best of reading for yall.

I just about threw my phone again. It was getting on my nerves! Like why is she such a bitch to him! She manipulates and is so toxic.

The concept of this show is great the love interest hate her-hate hate hate her! It's not even meant to be a romance!!

The Flash was apart of the arrowverse list I decided to finally sit down and watch. Green Arrow season 1 passed, building was solid Helena that show’s Iris was dead. Omgosh how happy was i to see her die on screen. Why did the female leads or potential female leads have to be so manipulative. Like give me someone sweet and gentle with their hero partner. Something that while not physically strong is still strong and able to overcome stuff. I don't want her to feel so out of this world, more like if a hero clinged to the idea of normal. And her turn around to “i didn't want to be normal. I wanted to be abnormal like you. But with you I learned that normal is just fine. That normal is peacefully morning with coffee. They're watching kids in yards.” Domestic shit. And the hero? He gets that normal that he so desperately wanted.

Like that'd feel so much more in character for someone sweet and nerdy like Barry. Why the hell would he go for a journalist? Why would he stick with his first love who clearly wasn't interested in him. Like think of the angst of a world crossover where an Iris gets Barry versus not. It'd be much more interesting than whatever the hell Spiderman x Superman fusion they wanted for flash.

“did you throw you phone again?”

Stocking my tongue out at my Roommate, “Your sure one big simp.” They laughed at my agony, “they could do Barry so much better if they gave up the Iris subplot! Let her die and stay dead!”

“What like you?”

“What no! Why does everyone assume that? Like sure I'm not against filling shoes but I don't think I'd be a good match for him.”

“Why? You simp hard enough.”

“Romance and relationship aren't about simping, dude. Plus he needs to slow down and breath. I'm someone who needs to go fast. Sure theorically would could balance each other out but…”

“But?”

“I'm not that much in dululu land. I'm aggressive and visually angry all the time. Defensive at the best. We'd probably grate against each other and ruin the whole friendly sweet personality Barry has.”

“You know? I think it'd be the opposite. Like you want to go fast but he needs to slow down for you. Where he's friendly you could keep a leash on him. Where he's late your already planning and coming up with ways to make him on time. I think it'd be a match made in heaven.”

“Ewww stop feeding my delusions. It doesn't matter anyways.”

“Why?”

“Cause he's a simp for Iris.” I say turning back to my phone with the paused TV show. Grumbling going back to it.

“I wonder….” My roommate trailed off clicking my door shut once again, I got the weirdness uneasy feeling running down my spine. Though shrugged it off for a hunch that something bad was going to happen in the show.

Oh how right I was.

3 days later.

“Your Caitlin Snow. Your Cisco Ramon. Your Harrison Wells.” I slowly spun pointing at the once characters so far away was now within touching distance. “And that means your…” A red blurr skids to a stop, “Flash.”

I let the silence steep in the air as I chewed my thumb, “fucken Void.” I grabbed phone calling them immediately, “YOUR A FUCKEN BITCH! What did we say about dululus! WE DONT NOT ENCOURAGE OR CHANGE WORLDS TO SATISFY CURIOSITIES!”

“Well hello! I wanted to see if sparks would fly.”

“Oh sparks are gonna fly when I kill you and burn your body.” I snapped back before ending the call rubbing my forehead trying to think of a way go fix.

“So how'd you get in?” Cisco asked over his snack of the moment.

“Didn't mean to I opened a door.”

“A door?”

“Ya? Worlds are interconnected. You know the speedforce and realm jumping and all that shit.”

“You know about the Speedforce?”

“Now to find the right door so I can strangle my darling roommate. They said go for it. They said what could happen with an interdimetionable being? Nothing they'd be too scared to ruin the balance of things. NO NO ONE MET THIS Stupid fucker! So long as it's interesting it'll happen.” I wandered through Starlabs I could feel people staring into my back as I open and closed various doors in opens to finding the right one but no luck.

“So this happens often?”

“Yep.” Popping the P with a big sigh of defeat, as another door failed.

“So Void? Just sends you off with nothing?”

“No no. He chaotic neutral bish knows I know my way around this world.

“So its not random?”

“No. Gods do you enjoy interrogating me? World's often have echos of each order. Speedsters can only come I contact with ones that either have speedforce on it or if a doppelganger is there. Void doesn't have those restrictions. He's not a bad guy or even someone who you can fight. He's not a rogue or a metahuman you created. He just like putting theories to a test.”

“Is it alright that your sharing this information?”

“Sure it's not like you'll remember me when this is over.”

“Wait why not?”

“Cause I don't exist here? By allying myself with my roommate I essentially killed off any dopples of myself. I'm the one and only. And two you wouldn't remember me cause it'd break timelines. Everything I do will be edited to fit whatever narrative. With minor exceptions.”

“and those exceptions?”

“I'll will be replaced by someone who fits better.”

[pale-silver-comb]

So I know absolutely nothing about Leverage except what I've been seeing you post lately and I have to admit you're making it look tempting to watch! Can I ask what are some of your favorite things about the show/reasons you would suggest people watch it? And is there really a poly relationship that is canon?

Okay. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. I am going to do my best not to just “asdfghkjl” at you and answer coherently.

In a nutshell, Leverage is about 5 people. 4 are criminals (Parker, Hardison, Eliot and Sophie) with different and unique skill-sets and 1 is an ex-insurance investigator (Nate) who, at one point or another in his career, has tracked down (or at least attempted to) the other 4. The whole show is essentially: man reluctantly reforms 4 criminals to use their criminal powers for good and 4 criminals move into man’s life and stubbornly refuse to leave because, goddammit, now they have morals. 

I’ve got a lot of favourite things about the show but the main ones are as follows:

1. Found family. And I’m not talking about loners who come together to fight crime and happen to co-exist to the point where they realise they happen to have found themselves a family. I mean, Nate and Sophie are the Drunk Uncle and Wine Aunt who somehow become Mom and Dad to 3 beautiful criminal children. Mom and Dad love their criminal babies and the kids love them (as well as each other, but we’ll come to that in a moment). You get amazing family moments such as: Mom and Dad packing the kids lunch before sending them out to kick corporate greed’s ass; Mom and Dad giving the kids ridiculously expensive and personal Christmas presents causing their most Grumpy Kid to go very very quiet and soft as he runs off to gleefully play with his new murder toy; the kids interrupting Mom and Dad’s big Movie Style Kiss to ask if they can please keep their new underground layer and huffing and puffing when Dad tells them no.

2. Found family: the OT3 edition. To answer your question, the OT3 is indeed canon, confirmed by the creator. Now, usually, “confirmed by the creator” infuriates me because most of the time it’s a way for a creator to be seen as “progressive” without doing anything to actually be progressive. That isn’t the case here. The OT3 are built up carefully and while it is obvious the creators didn’t originally intend for all 3 of them to become a relationship in the romantic sense, by mid-season 5 we are given a very clear picture of where Parker, Hardison and Eliot are heading in their relationship. There aren’t any kisses at the end to signal this but there are solid marriage vows in not only one but two episodes. (And by marriage vows I mean literal equivalents of marriage vows: “for better or worse” and “’til death do us part”. I’m not even exaggerating). The OT3 also doesn’t need explicit romantic narratives to convey how much they love each other. Their love is laced through the whole show, from the way they teach each other things to the way they respond to each other and work as a unit. The way they fiercely protect and admire each other. Like someone once said, if you need characters to kiss or say I love you to let the audience know they love each other, you are writing them wrong. 

Aside from that, each of the parings in the OT3 are just. Gah. They are so well done, with friendship being the solid basis for them all. The creators never expect the audience to assume anything about them or fill in the gaps. They give us their relationships on screen and reference many things off-screen to show us how these relationships continue to build in between episodes.

Hardison and Parker are a canon couple and date in the show: it’s approached slowly and they are so goddamned sweet. They are basically every fluffy slow-burn trope with a healthy dash of mutual pining in the mix. They are basically that quote “love is patient, love is kind”. (I would like to add their romance never becomes the focus of the show or overrides the importance of any other relationship they have with the other characters, especially Eliot.)

Hardison and Eliot are the Old Married Couple and from day one are already bickering and looking at each other/making comments that are found in every UST fic ever (not to mention Hardison has a very good knack for making Eliot grin like a little kid, when usually he’s basically an Angry Little Chef Man). They argue, they play, and love each other plain as day. 

Parker and Eliot are more subtle but every bit as wonderful. They have an unspoken connection and understand each other on a level no-one else can. Parker and Eliot are not good with giving themselves over to affection for different reasons (and Hardison plays a central role in helping them realise it’s okay to want it and have it- that boy has endless patience) but there is something so beautiful in the way the two of them come together on their own and develop their own special bond that works for them. Parker and Eliot are that trope where the characters don’t need to speak to understand each other perfectly. They just do. Their love language is a lot of the time non-verbal but speaks volumes. (Parker also likes to annoy the hell out of Eliot and Eliot....just.....lets...her. Because he’s soft. The softest, grumpiest boy.) 

I could go into so much depth for each pairing and their dynamics as a 3 but that's for another post.

3. Subverting stereotypes. There is the occasional hiccup in the show regarding stereotypes but ultimately, Leverage gets an A+ when it comes to writing characters and making them 3 dimensional people who are not defined by certain characteristics or events. Nate could so easily fall into the White Man Pain trope where he uses the trauma of losing his kid as a reason as to why he is entitled to act like a dick. Nate is a dick but he doesn’t use his pain to excuse it and I appreciate that. Hardison is a black man who is soft and nurturing. Easily the most empathetic and patient of the group. He’s nerdy, an actual genius, and has the biggest heart of all the characters. Nate is maybe the glue but Hardison is definitely the heart. Media’s usual aggressive, amongst other, racist stereotypes can fuck right off. Parker is canonically autistic (I am sure this was confirmed by one of the creators) and she is not defined by it. It’s not written as some kind of singular personality trait. It’s part of what makes up Parker but it’s only one facet of who she is and not once is her actions, thoughts or feelings treated like a joke. Sometimes people don’t understand why she does and says the things she does but it’s met with patience and fondness over the course of the show. Equally, it’s not met with over-caution. Parker is just Parker. No-one tries to change her. The other nice thing is Hardison, who always makes sure Parker knows she’s amazing because of who she is and not in spite of it. Finally, Sophie is in her 40s. She’s not treated like she’s past her prime. Ever. She’s sexy, smart and never is she pitted against or compared to Parker (who is younger) for anything. Sophie is amazing and there’s never even a conversation of “I may be older but I am still *insert adjective typically associated with younger women here*”. Sophie is possibly the first female character I’ve ever seen who isn’t just unapologetic about her age but has never had to apologise for her age. It’s a non-issue and that’s that. The women on the show are written so well, right down to secondary characters and it’s beyond refreshing.  

4.) It’s just fun. The show has a “monster of the week” type format. Except instead of a ghoul or a ghost, the monster is some corrupt wealthy and powerful individual or organisation. The show draws on real-life individuals to do this and therefore closely parallels real-life people and events. It addresses important political, economical, social and environmental issues while at the same time remaining fun and light-hearted. The characters constantly get the chance to play dress up and by GOD do they have fun with it. You get to watch Eliot beat up bad guys in the most delightful of ways, usually after a witty non-sequitur and with a weapon you’d never think could be a weapon. The dialogue and back and forth between the characters is everything. And finally - my favourite thing- the team can never resist striking a dramatic pose after they’ve taken down the bad guy, making sure the bad guy sees them. I mean, they COULD just walk away, satisfied they’ve taken the person down, but nope. They gotta be dramatic bitches 24/7 and pose like they are models for every single month of this year’s Criminal Calendar.  

5.) Competence Porn. So. Much. Competence Porn.  

Honestly, I could list a thousand reasons for why Leverage is amazing but to list them would to be spoiling so many amazing moments you’d get to discover for the first time on your own if you do choose to watch it. It’s the kind of show you can watch with an eagle-eye and sink your teeth into. But it’s also the kind of show if, you would prefer, put on in the background for something entertaining while you do something else. Each episode is about the job at hand but it’s made up of so many moments between the characters that show how much the creators and writers care about them. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll do whatever it is you do when something Soft and Wonderful happens that makes your heart melt. I am so beyond grateful for Leverage. It’s everything I always wanted in a show. Nearly every show I’ve watched in the past 10 years has disappointed me in some way, usually either because the writers run out of steam or characters who I love are treated poorly or given some kind of unnecessary “shock value” arc. Leverage doesn’t do that. Leverage is what it says on the bottle. Fandom isn’t something I joined because I needed canon fix-its. Fandom only enhances and celebrates an already excellent canon. 

[bookaddict24-7]

I said at the beginning of the year that I would share my reviews more on my blog instead of just on Instagram and Goodreads. I’ve been reading a lot so far this year, so my reviews will be delayed on here.

Friend me on Goodreads here to read my reviews in real-time!

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96. A Court of Silver Flames by Sarah J. Maas--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Listened to the audiobook for this one (from the library) because the size of the physical book was promising to put me in a slump. Wow, when people told me this was SPICY, they weren’t lying. I’m used to spice—I LOVE having spice in my books. It was only weird for me because of two things: 1) knowing that this was previously a YA series even though we all knew it wasn’t really, but teens and kids are still going to pick this spice-fest up; 2) The audiobook voice actress was...very passionate and aggressive about these scenes. There’s a certain level of aggression I need behind the word “stroking” and this narrator just overdid it a bit. Other than the female MC reminding me of her sister from the first book (she was very woe is me—which I get because of her trauma), this was an entertaining romance with fantastical elements. I will most definitely be picking up the next book—especially if this level of spice keeps going. I did like the character growth and how the female MC handled herself AFTER she learned how to better control her anger and after she started to help herself heal from her trauma. It’s true what they’ve been saying: this is Faerie Porn. Prepare yourself.

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97. Blue Flag Vol. 4 by Kaito--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Again, beautiful volume and that storyline is amazing! My only sad realization is that my ship is probably never going to happen 😭 But please pick up this series if you can—the artwork alone makes it worth it! The covers are GORGEOUS. Definitely one of my faves. ___

98. Rent A Boyfriend by Gloria Chao--⭐️⭐️

** spoiler alert ** I wanted to love this book because the concept was right up my alley. I love the fake boyfriend trope! I also loved AMERICAN PANDA by this author, so I had high hopes... We all know that's my downfall. While I didn't hate the book, I was disappointed. The romance was very insta-love (why THIS particular girl when he's encountered so many others with similar home lives?) and even the actions that happen later on made me wonder if their blossoming romance was strong enough for them to make such life-altering decisions. I mean, all the power to them if it gave them the push they needed. My biggest disappointment with this book, however, was how the female MC was treated and how she would react to said treatment. Books like this one with parents that are extremely controlling/verbally abusive make me so angry because I'm watching it from an outsider's perspective, which I know gives it a whole other tone. I can't say how I would react if I was the teenager in the situation, but being an adult on the outside, I wish I could throttle these parents. The kids are so used to the abuse that they end up making excuses, "empathizing" with their abusers, and even apologizing for making their parents feel a certain way. Here's what really and truly bugged me here, and this might be a **SPOILER**: there is no alluding to the fact that these parents are abusive. The words aren't used, but it's clearly abuse. The dad suddenly changes his thinking and the mother is still a stubborn bitch who continues to belittle her daughter despite everything. And the daughter is like "I get that this is your love for me, but I need you to do it less". That is powerful in itself, but that's pretty much as aggressive as the MC got with her parents. I imagine that these kinds of relationships are tough to navigate, but I'm frustrated. Not because this isn't fully a happy ending (in my books) but because whenever I read these books, I'm supposed to see this as character development. I'm supposed to think, "Oh wow, look at this teenager empathizing with their parents when they feel bad about what they've said in their own defence." This book made me realize how often this happens in the YA books that frustrate me. I love YA books that have great communication if a parent is verbally abusive. The apology (from the parent to the child, NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND) is the moment where I'm like, alright, awesome. Communication! I'm ranting now. I apologize. I just get so frustrated with how powerless I feel when I read these books and I hope to never be an example of these parents who actively tell their daughter that "they agreed to this horrible match because she was too simple looking and not pretty enough to do any better." (I'm paraphrasing.) Anyway, I didn't know this would become a rant review because I didn't hate this book, it just made me angry at the inaction of the characters (except for one time where someone did try to intervene but the MC had a reaction that was like "why would you do this?" I highly recommend AMERICAN PANDA by this author, but this one was super disappointing.

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99. Come Tumbling Down by Seanan McGuire--⭐️⭐️

Today was not the greatest day for my reading. I listened to the audiobook for this one and was immediately lost, aha! I just found that I didn't care about this story. This series is seriously so hit or miss with me. Maybe it could also be that I didn't really care for Jack and Jill's story, so this one was just...eh? I borrowed the next one in the series from the library though, so I'm not giving up!

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100. A Taste for Love by Jennifer Yen--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I almost DNF'ed this book at first because I wasn't sure if I liked the tone, but I'm so happy I didn't! I'll admit that I went looking through reviews to see if I should keep going and the moment I saw that it was an adaptation of PRIDE & PREJUDICE I knew I was a goner. This was a lot of fun and very light. I think this would be the perfect read for summer. It's a great story about an Asian American girl who meets this handsome Asian American teen boy during a moment where he inadvertently becomes her saviour. Despite this meet-cute style meeting, he leaves her with a horrible first impression. Unlike a different book I recently read about tough Asian parents, I found this one had a great character arc between the MC and her parents. They were still tough on her and though I'm not part of that community, I always find it interesting how the parental and child relationships are portrayed (mainly because of societal stereotypes in media). I loved this relationship between the parents and the MC because both groups learned something from each other without being verbally abusive. I really enjoyed this adaptation. It was fresh enough to not feel repetitive, and the surprise bi-rep was awesome. I wasn't expecting that and I love being surprised (for the better). If you want a light contemporary read with Asian rep, this is definitely the read for you!

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Have you read any of these? Would you recommend them? 

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Happy reading!

[dutifullybitchypeach]

ACOSF FINAL THOUGHTS. 3/5

It was good. But it could have been EPIC. I think I got caught up in the hype and should have remained blissfully ignorant. Loved Nestas journey and her finding happiness. WELL DESERVED.

However lots of loose threads, ignored angst, rushed ending, pregnancy plot overshaowed a lot - 2 chapters wasted!

It was Nestas book with Cassians POV to balance. It was interesting to read how skewed, almost backwards it was the way Nesta saw things. Like the IC behaviour/comments at times to her was counter acted then with Cassians interpretation. Really showed her low her self esteem was.

I know it's Nesta letting go and being happy with herself and I believe SJM wrote it this way to be deliberately CLEAR that the IC are NOT perfect and are 100% capable of being total pricks. BUT that they are not held accountable for their actions the same way Nesta is, was frustrating. Cold hard facts: Nesta never murdered/stole/lied/tortured/assaulted anyone. She was a bum and a drunk who spewed hurtful shite. An angry bitch. However the only thing she ever wilfully killed was the King of Hyburn at the NC's request. The level of disgust from Amren/Rhys/Mor directed at Nesta in the beginning was uncomfortable to read and didn't sit well with me.

I'll have to read it again but I was not satisfied . Nestas character arc started half way through ACOWAR. She stepped up when they needed her to.

Feyre agreeing despite her experience in Spring was a step backwards for me. Then again it's exactly what Nesta needed. Cruel to be kind. And Feyre had Nestas back repeatedly throughout the narrative.

Loved Nestas story all of it, training, friendships, self love, etc etc. Gwyn and Emerie ❤ All epic. And she's well...more interesting! Detail on Cassian killing all those monsters, scene in the big, wow so good.

Feysand overkill or perhaps Rhys overkill. Sorry SJM but you need to pull back.

Nessian happened the way I thought it would. That Cassian isn't perfect is normal. His heart is Nestas, it's pretty clear. Smut scenes, I've read better sorry !!! Intensity was not the same as previous books. More sexy and less crude for me. Missed Cassians swagger but I guess we are in his head, and he's a big cuddly insecure bear. With a big d**k.

More thoughts (in my humble opinion).

Feysand pregnancy DRAMA. Unnecessary. Keep it, just don't let it happen the way it did. I've already said I thought the sacrifice should have been for Gywn/Emerie and there is a simple tie in IMO (see previous posts). Or perhaps Cassian actually stabbing himself rather than hurting Nesta with the Queen. But I get SJM and 'losing' her power, that much power just undermines the remaining plot for next few books. Nesta could just blast them all to hell. And she stole it in anger and has let it go with love. Growth! She is clearly still hella powerful. We don't know the half of it.

For me the above was the most irritating. The ending squeezed in. And I like Feysand. But Nesta healing with Feyre needn't have been so convoluted. Or drastic. More private, perhaps a real angsty, tense conversation and confession. They didn't discuss anything.

The last few chapters too much went on...important moments; first females to win The Rite, sidelined. Accepting the mating bond, sidelined. WTF is Nestas power now, sidelined. Queen dead, sidelined. An ILLYRANIAN FEMALE KICKING ASS sidelined. I mean Christ that was Cassians goal! And nothing. NOTHING. Not even a handshake.

Rhys. It was plain uncomfortable. But someone mentioned SJM deliberately wrote Rhys that way for this book and that's true. In the Feyre POV she mentions "two mates" the reasonable one and the asshole so that, I think, is telling. He's def more HL and pulls rank in this book with everyone.

Rhys clearly witnesses Nestas trauma from her nightmare but there is no recognition with Nesta. Not a peep. Yet he clearly feels massive regret. Is that for our benefit, the readers? That at least we know. Don't hate on Rhys. (I like Rhys btw)

I'd have liked a full circle scene where they are back in THAT sitting room admiring baby Nyx and Nesta just says a few things. Cooly and calmly. She's happy they intervened, but for all their wisdom and years of living it left a lot to be desired. Nothing too crazy, just a few delivered lines, Nesta style.

Felt Nesta lost a little of her fire. But maybe you see it more from the others POV. Though they always provoked her and it was a defence mechanism. And she was a bitch at times. With others outside the IC it's clear she is not like that. Make what you will of that.

I know SJM doesn't like to over detail things but a moment with Feyre/Nyx/Nesta alone would have been nice.

The sisters never meeting Gwyn or Emerie. A scene like that would have been powerful.

Amren is as Mor rightly said is a "cranky old bastard". And "Welcome back to the Night Court Nesta Archeron" screamed, now that you've scrubbed up love come on home. I don't know. Amren was clearly done with Nesta she was the one that stood by her the most and got sick shit of her. All Amren can command is respect now and Nesta really wanted hers, possibly the most.

Can I make a point about people harping on about slut shaming. Amren made one catty observation, that Nesta would ride almost anything. No other character mentioned it. Not one. And Nesta enjoyed her bed partners, she refers to some of it (threesome!). There was zero shame. And SJM hates slut shaming. So stop. It's not a thing.

I'm nitpicking but there was a lot of hurt just left off. Perhaps that was the point. SJM was like, fuck it, Nesta doesn't want to feel that anger or resentment anymore she wants to live and be happy. She's found inner peace with herself and those that matter most. Me wanting justification for how they treated her at timea is not the point!!! Lol.

The painting, that stood out for me in ACOFAS. It hurt to read it. Maybe Feyre had nothing to paint of Nesta. They didn't talk. Share thoughts. I think Feyre asking Nesta herself to show her memories of The Rite so she could paint it would have had more impact. But it read very plainly like now you've earned your spot here...or I like you now or something. She was deliberately not there, perhaps until she wanted to be. Or finally accepted and embraced life with the IC. It was an unnecessary detail that just fueled the Feysand halo (again I like Feysand).

Nesta made those weapons therefore they are hers. Amren is power hungry. Rhys seems happy to hand them over. High King drama, I can see it. It could happen.

It's clear that Nesta didn't want to leave the NC, therefore she had to fall in. People have a problem with 'who's boss' but we've only ever had court dynamics from Rhys/Feyre POV. And they are the top dogs in the NC. We are going to have to get used of seeing Feysand make decisions from the outside. It's THEIR court. And to be fair, Feyre always had Nestas back.

And yes I believe you always have a choice with Rhys. I know some scoff at that.

Rhys kneeling to Nesta further proves our gal is a Queen. Feyre is the only one he's ever bowed to. SJM gave us that moment for Nesta and we will have to be content despite he's questionable aggressive behaviour. He clearly has issues with family given his past.

Enjoyed seeing a bit of Elaine. Finally. And Nesta delivered some home truths! Elaine needs to find some backbone. Really looking forward to her story. Go mad SJM!

Feysand POV should have been the fallout of Rhys keeping baby drama from Feyre. Now THAT I would want to hear. And perhaps Feyre saying to Nesta I'm "secretly glad you told me".

Eris I always found super interesting. It's clear to me he knows Mor is gay. Him helping her would have meant she was trapped in the AC. 'Rejecting her' allowed Rhys and Co to save her and to have freedom. She screwed him by keeping it secret. His arc will be with Lucien I think.

Az and Elaine not for me. Sorry. I'd like Lucien to find some happiness. I've spoken of this before see other posts. Az tortures people for a living, he has serious issues.

I've already spoken about Mor....remember her lol. Where is she! Ha! Actions speak louder than words with Mor. Winnow please my mate is being a dick, teach me to dance, dress shopping. But I guess she's Feyres friend, Nesta has hers. Nesta feeling ashamed as to how she treated Mor, will be interesting to see how Mor feels about that oul time when I was such a hypocrite, lol, what I really meant was....

There are 2 more books and a novella so who knows. Nessian ain't over.

Going to look forward to the fanfiction!

Thanks SJM.

[lilacskyura]

I’m sorry if this is too specific but could you do a h/c for Todoroki that his S/o is like hella badass and they have a trans sibling (male to female if possible) who gets bullied a lot and they always defend them and then one day when the S/o finds out that their sibling is being bullied again they go to find them only to find Todoroki’s already defending them and everything I just thought that’d be a random cute thing 💖

Innocence | Shoto Todoroki

hope u enjoy angel <3 @spencers-abit-weebish

↳ in which y/n’s trans sibling has an issue standing up to bullying. like the hero he is, shoto is there to lend a helping hand. mild fighting, mentions of bullying

↠ I do not believe any of the mha characters would ever be transphobic; i made a random support character!

✰

“It’s because I’m different to them, they dont see me as an equal.” She gushed, looking at you with watery eyes. “Why not?” You asked, angry that you had missed the signs of this yourself, you had let her down.

“Just because you took more time to find who you are, doesn’t mean you’re any less of a person. You’re my sister, that’s that.” You said, wiping the last few tears from her eyes.

You couldn’t begin to fathom what she has to go through daily just to be herself and knowing people were making that more difficult than it needed to be made your blood boil.

“Tell me who,” you said, taking her hand into yours. “It really doesnt matter...” she trailed off, avoiding eye contact with you.

“Nobody is allowed to fuck with my family. I will die before I let someone make you feel any less than perfect.” You pressed, edging her to tell her who was causing her trouble.

“They’re in the support course, the pink haired girl that always follows Shinsou around like a lost dog.” They grumbled, grabbing your sleeve urging you to not do anything stupid.

You could hear- all you saw was red. Pushing yourself up off your bed you stormed out of the dorm- your sister staying where she was. “Where the fuck is that pink haired bitch from the support course?” You shouted to the living room.

Bakugo wasn’t laughing as he saw how angry you were: he just shrugged.

You turned away from him and continued down the halls- your vision tunneling as your eyes landed on her as she reached into the cupboard for a snack.

Like a rabid dog you tore after her. Stopping in your tracks as you saw Shoto, your boyfriend, already talking to her.

“Talking” the girl looked like a deer in headlights.

“I’m just struggling to understand why you think it’s okay to constantly degrade someone who has done nothing wrong to you, they’re living- peacefully- training to proctect innocent people and you think it’s okay to harass her?” Todo said, anger enveloped his words.

“Well, she’s not exactly your sister is she?” The girl sneered, ingorance dripping from her every word.

“She isn’t my sister, no you’re right. But she’s y/n’s sister- taking that out of the equation- she is innocent and living peacefully. Leave her alone or I swear to God you’ll wish you’d never laid your eyes on her.” He pressed, stepping closer before finishing his sentence:

“She was born in the wrong body, that’s all, she’s confident and brave and strong enough to live how she was meant to and she doesn’t need ignorant little arseholes like you making life hard. How are you going to call yourself a hero when you terrorise innocent people for living?” He snarled.

You were watching intently, Todo wasn’t an aggressive person at all; watching him defend your sister so fiercely made your heart swell with pride.

“Get out of my face,” The girl stressed, Shoto obliged taking a small step backwards before berating her some more- “apologise, to y/s/n.” He said flatly, watching the girl walk away in a sulk, she got served a death glare from you as she stalked out of the room.

Shoto turned around to face you, your eyebrows were raised slightly as you pulled him into an embrace - “Thank you. You didn’t have to do that, I was on my way to beat her up,” you laughed, earning a laugh from Shoto.

“People are ignorant. It’s difficult to understand that it still happens but everyone here supports anyone, who they are or who they love. There is nothing wrong with your sister, I wasn’t about to let her make your sister feel like there was something wrong with her” He added, taking your hand in his as he turned to the counter - staring at the soba he had neatly perpared.

“I showed her who the weak person was.” He said, stroking the back of your head gently, pointing to the soba- “want to share?”

<3 - a little note from me:

i am and always will be an ally to the LGBTQ+ community, everyone is loved and should always be allowed to express themselves for who they are. you’re all strong, confident and deserve the very best.

although this topic wasn’t mentioned specifically in this h/c - the same goes for the POC community, i will continue and forever be an ally to you and defend you against anything that comes your way.

i may not go through the struggles you do; i will continue to fight for you.

we are all human. we all deserve the equal opportunity to live. You are all loved. Massively. Embrace who you are and never let anybody take away from that.

[frenchibi]

A rant-essay about The Witcher books (and comparison to the show)

((after having read book one, and started into a good chunk of book two.))

Proceed at your own discretion, there will be a lot of frustration and swearing. Also, spoilers for basically the entirety of the Netflix show. Also, there is discussion of sexual assault and objectification and lots and lots of sexism.

The structure of my rant is as follows (because yes I structured it):

 1. Things that I enjoyed in the books

1.1 Geralt talks more

1.2 Geralt and Jaskier have a better relationship

1.3 The fairy tale theme

2. Things that made me want to scream

2.1 Geralt (is not a good character)

2.2 Yennefer (deserves better)

2.3 Jaskier's sexism (Netflix!Jaskier would NEVER)

2.4 Female Characters; Sexy Fantasy That Fucks (it's bad)

2.5 Narrative devices and structure (it’s bad)

3. Bonus: Why the audiobook grinds my gears

Total length: 4k words :’) Click to proceed.

(So, we’re doing this? I think forty likes is sufficient general interest, so... okay. Obligatory disclaimer here: This Is My Opinion. However, I am not fabricating any of the… grounds for my opinion, it is based on the content of the books, that I read, and which are broadly available, so anyone can read them and see for themselves. Personally, I would not recommend the experience, and below I will detail the reasons why. If, like I was, you’re hesitant about reading them, this essay might sway your decision either way. You might go “oh thanks op now I know I won’t like it” or “huh I think I wanna see this for myself because you’re yelling a lot”. It’s all equally valid. Anyway, let’s proceed with “things I enjoyed”.)

1.1 Geralt talks more Geralt in the books is a bit of a mess as far as characterization goes - but I don't hate that he's less stoic here and less... idk, arrogant/superior towards humans than he is in the show. He talks to people, engages with them, discloses opinions and thoughts and… it's a good look. We even get several pages of monologue from him at one point (because he is talking to a priestess who has taken a vow of silence, but I’ll take it – the books in general have a monologue/structure problem which I will address in 2.5) which is way more than the show ever provided us with. I’d like to say it gives us an insight into the character but maybe that’s a bit of a stretch, see below (2.1).

 1.2 Geralt and Jaskier have a better relationship

Geralt and Jaskier are FRIENDS. And I mean that literally the first thing we hear Geralt say about Jaskier in canon in book one is "of course I want to see him, he's my friend". Which - Netflix!Geralt could NEVER and I'm salty about it. Jaskier in the books has his own problems (2.3) but I still think he's my favorite overall, he's fun and Geralt genuinely enjoys his company. They travel together and ENJOY it, they joke, they reminisce and it is Good. Netflix, take notes.

 1.3 The fairy tale theme

This gets lost in the Netflix adaptation altogether but. The idea in the books is that all these monsters that Geralt encounters are dark twists on fairy tales and I'm HERE FOR IT. Renfri is literally Snow White But Badass. Cinderella, Rapunzel and Rumpelstiltskin’s stories are mentioned in passing, and other ideas that are explored here have fairy tale elements, e.g. slaying the dragon. It's cool, but apparently the story loses this aspect in later volumes so I guess it makes sense that the show decided to omit it. Still a bummer tho bc I liked that.

 So. Now on to Things that made me want to Scream, which is what we’re all really here for.

2.1 Geralt (is not a good character)

Geralt, oh Geralt, I wish you weren't such an obvious Mary Sue, Saviour™ and thinly veiled Jesus allegory. Geralt is always, ALWAYS right and it pisses me the fuck off. Geralt gets all the women he wants with NO PROMPTING and it makes me angry. Geralt always has the last laugh in every and any situation. Geralt is always smarter and more powerful than the Idiot Humans. Geralt ignores advice and suffers no consequences for it. Geralt has no well-thought out character, no consistency - he just is the "main character" and "hero" that the story needs - if the story needs him to be smart, he is, if it needs him to make a mistake, he does - he has no AGENCY and it’s BORING. Why am I supposed to care about him, exactly? Because the plot tells me to, and because everyone else is framed like an idiot in comparison and you’re supposed to like strong and smart characters. Cool. Bleh.

 2.2 Yennefer (deserves better)

Strap in, because this is the longest part.

Yennefer in the books is… a badass (but sexy) until the plot needs her to be a damsel (but sexy). She also occasionally has one (1) other character trait and that trait is Crazy Bitch.

I’ll admit I was not her biggest fan after the show (I didn’t really connect with her that much after she became vindictive™, though I gotta say her role in the last battle was Very Cool) but in the wake of what I have read so far, I have decided to AGGRESSIVELY STAN because she fucking. Deserves better. Oh my GOD it makes me so angry. Here’s how I think her character creation probably went:

"Ok so here we have Geralt, who is a badass, and So Cool, and he could have any Female he desires. But his Female can't be inferior and giggly and vapid like literally all other women - she needs to be the ideal fantasy Fantasy.

First: she needs powers. So we'll make her a Cool Sorceress! And more powerful than the other sorceresses because Geralt deserves the BEST. But also, he needs to be able to be Cooler and save her so she needs to be (like all females are, because they are inferior) emotionally volatile and vulnerable, and Geralt will also be the only one who gets to see that Vulnerability because Geralt has the biggest dick is her love interest. So she will be weak around him because he's just so hung wonderful.

Secondly, she needs a believable weakness (besides being too emotional because all women are too emotional), and as we all know, women have one purpose: to bREED. But not Yennefer - oh no, Yennefer is (wait for it, this is the dramatic backstory, hold your breath) broken, she's BARREN, USELESS AND EMPTY AND SHE HATES HERSELF FOR IT!!!!!

*pause for dramatic effect*

I know right that's so SEXY

[This is the point where I’m like… this might, possibly, maybe, under very different circumstances have been a compelling storyline if the author had ever consulted a woman. Or, you know, if the story was written by a woman. This is objectification and fetishization of the worst kind and I hate it. The show has this element too and it’s bad there too but it’s nowhere near as pronounced as in the books. Anyway-]

Speaking of sexy - obviously Yennefer is the sexiest of all the women Geralt has ever encountered. And because I, as the author, am aware that's unrealistic, I will drop in YET ANOTHER PIECE OF DRAMATIC BACKSTORY: She used to be a HUNCHBACK!!! *air horns* I KNOW RIGHT OH MY GOD and now she made herself SEXY with MAGIC because YOU KNOW ALL WOMEN WANT TO BE OBJECTIFIED BY MEN!!! SEXY FANTASY THAT FUCKS!!!!

[also? This is revealed to Geralt (and the reader) not by her telling him, or by a flashback, but because he "sees that she has the eyes of a hunchback". I can’t even begin to state how much I hate this.]

Anyway every time she shows up it will be mentioned how shapely her legs and breasts are and how young she looks despite the fact that she must be Old. She will turn heads and men will scorn her because she is too pretty and not interested in them and men hate anything that has any amount of sexual power or agency. but not Geralt, no, because he gets to fuck her at the end of the day so he's the only one who doesn't objectify her out loud. (but he does in his internal monologue. hooray.)

Also, to emphasize this point, we will have a side character sexually violate her while Geralt is tied up because that is The New Hotness™"

And if that wasn't enough, she as a character subscribes to what is known as "Female Hysteria For No Reason" and will become a Woman Scorned over absolutely nothing if the plot needs her to be angry.

The plot regarding her relationship with Geralt is also a bit different - in the show, she gets angry once she finds out Geralt's third wish ties them together (whether this is justified may be subjective - except yeah, no, she’s absolutely right, Geralt what the fuck??). In the book, she hears his wish as he makes it because MAGIC and is somehow SUPER INTO IT because this author has never met a human woman before.

...and then I need to complain about the storyline with the dragon. Because, you will remember, in the show, she gets angry and storms off after learning of the third wish, but that can’t be the case because she already knows about it in the books, right?

Well.

 The story in the books goes like this:

Six years ago, after one of their affairs™ Geralt leaves without waking Yennefer (but like. Leaves her flowers instead) and admittedly that's kind of rude but also like... ok. That doesn’t seem too strange a thing for Geralt to do. Maybe he just wanted to let her rest? Anyway.

They don't meet for six years, in which Geralt idk... idly misses her or something, and Yennefer develops a deep lasting hatred based on her abandonment issues…? (I am. grasping. there's no good reason if this relationship is as casual to both of them as they have made it sound, but she is SUPER MAD because the plot needs her to be ANGERY).

So with his backdrop, cue the search for the dragon. Geralt is like "eh I'll join them. I have nowhere better to be, also Jaskier is here and he's not boring so ok" and then he hears Yennefer will also be there and goes "oh well all the better, haven't seen her in a while"

And when he follows her to her tent to greet her, she spits verbal FIRE at him and is like "bitch you're lucky i didn't gouge your fucking EYES out" and other lovely statements of a similar calibre, and Geralt just stands there and takes it and tells her he missed her.

which implies either a) he knows what he did and he thinks he deserves this, or b) he has done nothing wrong in his own eyes and this is just "bitch crazy" to be ignored. It is heavily implied to be b), because, in our third person POV narrative, we get NO REMORSE from him, no indication as to what he thinks about this whole thing Yennefer is accusing him of, nothing at all in terms of emotional response to her. Cool. She yells at him and then storms of, and he just… idk, shrugs I guess?

So, they travel, Yennefer is Icy Bitch Queen but also everyone hates her and insults her to an absurd degree (see above, she's Too Sexy and Powerful and also like, a Woman) and she takes it without saying anything back but it's obvious that everyone's trash talk is affecting her (so it’s obvious that at some point she will be Vulnerable again). Jaskier, who seems to have no personal grudge against her at this point in the books, joins in the teasing because he's there to make fun of everyone I guess? (boy.) No deeper malice from him than from anyone else though.

And then, for drama, the party reaches a narrow bridge. They’re debating whether or not it is safe to cross with all their supplies and then BAM! there's a landslide so they have no choice. The events go like this:

- Geralt lets the others cross first. Right as he wants to cross, he hears Yennefer yell because her horse fell over, because of course it did

- Geralt abandons his own means of escape to go help her up, and then she proceeds to save his ass because SHE HAS FUCKING MAGIC THERE WAS NO POINT IN YOU GOING TO SAVE HER YOU FUCKER she just makes a shield so nothing hits them and they stumble to the bridge

- they get caught on the bridge as it collapses, and of course Yennefer is the one who falls first, and he catches her, so they're both hanging there and he's holding on to her suspended over this. Canyon or whatever.

- Jaskier, from above, yells to the others to get a rope to help pull them up but they respond to "wait until the bitch has fallen, then we'll pull the witcher up"

which. wow. but ok.

Yennefer can barely hold on, and HERE is where Geralt asks her to forgive him for… his wrongdoings…? (you know, can't have her die with a grudge, I guess? Or whatever?) He's like "Yen, forgive me" and she says "NEVER"

((and also, she has consistently kept telling him to stop calling her Yen (which he first started when they started... having Relations™ so obviously now it has bad memories attached to it for her), which he blatantly ignores because her feelings don't matter))

In the end, Jaskier gets the others to help despite their reluctance and hatred of Yennefer and they travel on. Yennefer's back to being Ice Queen - and then they find the dragon. Some fucker tries to fight it alone and gets injured. Yennefer is in charge of healing this dude, and so she ends up alone with Geralt in a tent – where she asks him to double-cross everyone else and kill the dragon himself (after telling them all she would cooperate with them) - "for me. I want the dragon, Geralt, for myself. All of it. I don't want to share. Kill it for me" and then explains that not all is lost because with certain parts of the dragon, SOMEONE CAN CURE HER BARRENNESS and i want to launch myself into the fucking sun

Geralt is like "uhhhh"

she says "on the bridge, you asked for my forgiveness- if you do this, I'll forgive you"

and then HE GOES "well, that no longer matters to me. I'm over it now" which hsadjlkfhsajdklfhsajkldfhaskdfsj I cannot begin to impart to you how many levels of “UGH” I felt at the predictable reversal of roles because he can’t ACTUALLY have to apologize to her – it’s HER who has to apologize to HIM for being an irrational Female

and now SHE'S all like. quivering lip and wanting him back or whatever and I am SICKENED that SHE IS THE ONE WHO HAS TO GROVEL NOW BECAUSE THE PLOT CANNOT HAVE GERALT EVER MAKE A MISTAKE AND OWN TO IT?!?

Thanks, I hate it.

 Oh and I almost forgot in all my rage about that storyline – when we first meet her, we learn that Yennefer apparently doesn’t “bother with the whalebone [i.e. corset] nonsense other women use” (literal quote from the book) so I guess her tits are magic???

This just in, if she needs boob support SHE’S A THOT, if your knockers don’t stand on their own you’re INFERIOR and NOT DESIRABLE, GTFO.

 2.3 Jaskier’s sexism (Netflix!Jaskier would never)

Jaskier, you have been done dirty.

It could have been so cool too - Jaskier in the books is witty and likeable and makes friends wherever he goes because everyone likes a bard?? Also he's really smart and knowledgeable because "a bard needs to know about many things" which is SO VALID??? And Geralt trusts him and cares about his opinion??? And also it's clear Jaskier likes Geralt, not just for the purpose of writing ballads about him, but because they're old friends, they've travelled together a lot - yes, their relationship is good here, regardless of your shipping preferences. (Also, he wears a hat with a large feather on it, which is how Geralt recognizes him in crowds, and it's amazing and hilarious.)

HOWEVER.

Jaskier treats women terribly. At his first introduction, he literally gropes a priestess (and then makes fun of the high priestess for chastising him for it). He sees women very much as objects to be… maybe not “won” but, well, persuaded, which makes him a tiny bit better than most of the other men, who are basically straight-up rapists. But then there's the scene with Yennefer which. Made everything turn sour tbh. It goes like this:

Yennefer wants to go after the dragon alone (see above), but before she can get Geralt to do it for her and double-cross everyone, she's overwhelmed by some of the other men in the party and they're all tied up (Jaskier, Geralt, some other pacifist sorcerer who is around, and Yennefer). And one of the men, who hates her for her (sexual) power, rips open her blouse and exposes her and assaults her while she screams, so then he gags her. And then when he’s done he walks away and leaves her exposed. Geralt looks away after she screams at him not to stare (wow, points for chivalry, the standard is literally So Low - also his justification for obeying her wishes is that he’s already seen her boobs so it’s not a big deal to him anymore) but Jaskier shamelessly stares at her even after she makes it absolutely clear she does not consent to ANY of this and has no choice because SHE IS TIED UP, and he even jokes that he'll write a ballad about her perfect breasts. And I'm over here like.... no. no, no, no, no, no. Jaskier deserved better characterization and Yennefer deserves a better fucking franchise.

 2.4 Female characters; Sexy Fantasy That Fucks (it’s bad)

I have touched a lot on this already so I'll try to be brief, but. Ugh.

Sexy Fantasy That Fucks™ is practically a legit genre and sadly a lot of semi-progressive fantasy falls into this category - where we have moved on from having only like one or two named female character (see: LotR) to having several, and look, they can even fight, but only as long as they're aggressively sexually attractive to men while they do it. Poor Harley Quinn suffered the same treatment in Suicide Squad - The Male Gaze Filter.

Here in the books it goes like this: Oh look, “vaguely tribal” women who fight - but they're also the most overtly sexual and involved in a canon off-screen orgy with Geralt and an older (practically old) man and are portrayed as Perpetually Horny. Oh look, Yennefer, a badass sorceress who falls apart when Geralt so much as looks her way because Geralt is so fucking great I guess. Then there’s the 14-year-old striga princess who needs to be described, once her curse is lifted, with emphasis to her “perky breasts”. SHE'S FOURTEEN. And there’s the young priestesses, who are subtly flattered by Jaskier's direct "advances" because, you know, they've dedicated their lives to serving a goddess but understandably they just WANT TO FUCK™.

There is a single female character who is not sexualized - the head priestess, Nenneke. She's described as fat and old (and wise though, throw her a bone). Geralt respects her because of her wisdom but that's it - she has a Use™. And also, he ignores her advice in the end anyway. Pity she wasn't more beautiful I guess. I am Sickened.

 2.5 Narrative devices and structure (it’s bad)

Now, we get to the bones of the thing. There's... one main thing that really bothers me and that's a CLASSIC - the fact that this author prefers to have action explained to the reader through monologues by characters that inexplicably have All The Information, rather than have us, you know, experience the action first hand. There are a couple of fight scenes of Geralt vs A Monster, sure, but that's all we get - everything else is told to us through monologues. (and yes it's still a monologue even if Geralt interrupts to say "go on" or "get to the point". It's not really a dialogue if the other person is only being expositioned at. Now Geralt just looks impatient and annoying.) Even the short story format (of the first two books) is explained this way: the individual short stories are monologues within conversations in the base timeline, explaining to the reader (and to Nenneke in the narrative proper) backstories and how characters met.

Which... it's a choice? It makes more sense than the show with it’s wack-ass timeline with absolutely no conext. But like. Why can't you have us at least discover the respective monster through someone else's POV though? I get that we're always staying with Geralt because Geralt is oh so great, but rather than have some Constable explain to him for like twelve pages how the princess (who is, without any intrigue, an incest-princess - this is not a mystery, everybody is aware of this at the beginning of the story and freely provides this information without prompting) became a striga and how many people she has killed and what people say she looks like and how to allegedly cure her - can’t we see that shit happen? Like... ok, thanks? I hate it. The show did this better.

 3. Bonus: why the audiobook grinds my gears

Last and definitely least - the audiobook is BAD (but I don't want to buy physical copies, and my library won't have the English version because I live in Germany, so I guess I'm stuck with it). The guy who reads it is Bad At Reading Out Loud because his emphasis/cadence is incredibly unnatural (also regrettably all the books are read by the same guy) and his pronunciation of names (most notably Jaskier, who is called Dandelion in the English version of the books) is inconsistent??? He started out by (correctly) calling him dandelion in book 1 and now has changed to pronouncing it dandelion, like the flower, which is not how you say his name (and... no offense if he’d started out that way because I, too, thought that was how you said it just from reading the word - but he says it CORRECTLY in the first book and then changes it to the wrong pronunciation in book two so I’m confused?? How does that happen?)

Also - different accents for different characters are only a good idea if a) you're good at accents and b) they aren't overtly connoted? Like. Don't give a guy in a fantasy setting a bad russian accent??? Also what part of Geralt as a character made you think SCOTTISH???? Oof.

And another thing - these little descriptors after direct speech? They MATTER.

"Don't touch me," Yennefer hissed

and

"Don't touch me," Yennefer screamed

are two very different sentences and should be read as such. You can't just. Say "Don't touch me" seductively and then add "she yelled". That's not how voice acting works. Please, pLEASE I'M SUFFERING. I was already struggling enough with some of the content of the books and now you’re making consuming them really difficult and irritating :’) Oof.

 In conclusion – I don’t even know. I was mad and now I’m tired.

  Anyway, all this to say – I didn’t hate every aspect of the books. I will keep reading (in my case listening) because I’m stupid, I apparently love to suffer and I am, thanks to the show, invested in the storyline and want to know what happens. But I will most certainly keep complaining about them because that’s the only way to make this fun for myself. And are you not entertained?!

Who knows. Maybe stuff will get better.

Take from this post what you will, and if it’s only my personal hypocrisy then that’s fine. I hope you had a nice day – I’m gonna go make myself some tea to calm down. And I’ll have you know that despite what you may have heard, I have never worn a bra in my life, because I’m not like other girls.

[toongrrl-blog]

Perpetua: A Potential Heroine for our times.

Hi everyone we are going to rant about the Bridget Jones series once again and talk about a character, who I feel came too early before our current zeitgeist of bad bitch feminism and the #GirlBoss: Perpetua. 

Perpetua is not intended to be likable. She is very posh, snooty, a bit arrogant, and demanding of Bridget and people she works with, greeting Bridget with a slight sneer as she comes into work and Bridget’s inner monologue voices a desire to staple stuff to her head for having gained a bit of power over Bridget in the publishing company Pemberley Press. Gee, let’s see what we have: entitled, snooty, fancy, having the attitude they are above it all, who has those traits? I’ll wait *sipping tea*

But we notice something about Perpetua; after Bridget’s relationship with Daniel implodes because he was using her as his side piece and decides to find a better job elsewhere, Bridget goes to Daniel to tell him she is quitting. Perpetua overhears and picks up on what has been going on (she is appalled at what she is hearing) and as soon as Daniel tries to beg Bridget to stay, Perpetua gets up to defend Bridget: “I want to hear this, because if she gives one inch, I’m going to fire her bony arse for being totally spineless!” To her smiling pride, she sees Bridget tell Daniel off and leave the publishing company...and that’s the last we see of Perpetua. Even after that (awesome) scene, my teenage self got the message that it’s better to be a Bridget over a Perpetua, a bubbly but insecure girl who tries to conform to the male gaze over a stoic and IDGAF woman who does what she wants. I also heard messages from people, like my parents, telling me how important it was to act and look a certain way to be “likable”; it was better to be insecure and conventionally feminine rather than to be confident not very popular but self-assured. Also Bridget was the rom-com heroine who had people fall in love with her, Perpetua was seen as stuck-up and she was thrown to the wayside. Who stood to reap the benefits of our society?

Looking back, I found out that after almost 20 years of trying to be a Bridget: the “relatable” insecure girl next door type who is vulnerable and needs the validation of those to find her desirable and “worth it” that I’m wasn’t the likable, conventionally pretty and feminine Bridget...I was Perpetua: not always likable, assertive, willing to put her neck out there, not always sociable, but assured of her intelligence and her ability to turn heads. Plus we have our signature style and know how to work accessories. While Bridget dresses basic and in miniskirts (she wants to blend in but also attract men), Perpetua stands out in her headbands, pearls, cardigans, and pie-crust collars combining the elements that I loved in a younger Hillary Rodham Clinton, Peggy Olson, Nancy Wheeler, and Raquel Rodriguez Orozco from Destinos: An Introduction to Spanish. Just a Power Preppie who figured out how to stick out and take her place in a male-dominated workplace, with no apologies. 

After watching Tee Noir’s video on women who were declared to be problematic but upon second viewing and reading were raising valid points about their situation or the situations they observed but lacked the likability or popularity to be taken seriously, I was inspired to finally write this post. As Perpetua was a woman who showcased what it was like to live life on your terms and not ask for the permission of anyone to validate you. A woman who may have envied Bridget’s “bony arse” but didn’t let her size or peoples’ perceptions of her appearance get in the way of getting what she wanted from others. 

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Here are some tropes and issues I will be referring to in this order, as they relate to Perpetua’s role in the films and books and how they regard her.

Fatphobia: Being Targeted by Internalized Hatred

“Ah. Introduce people with thoughtful details. Perpetua, this is Mark Darcy. Mark is a prematurely middle-aged prick with a cruel raced ex-wife. Perpetua is a fat-ass old bag who spends her time bossing me around.” Bridget Jones’s inner monologue, Bridget Jones’s Diary (2001)

We all know that Bridget Jones is notoriously famous for obsessing over her weight (134 lbs. at 5′4″, which is pretty fine) and that there have been reviews of the books and the movies condemning her or passive-aggressively noting that she isn’t Hollywood Thin and how it was remarkable for she (with hourglass curves, wears a small to medium size, blonde and blue eyed, average pretty at her worst) to get Colin Firth and Hugh Grant (in their prime) to fight over her. Whether we go by the timeline of the books (her birth year being 1962, Marilyn Monroe’s death) or the movies (her birth year being 1969 in the first film, post Jayne Mansfield), we see that Bridget grew up in and became an adult in an age where the female standard of beauty had gotten thinner and thinner, with even models having their pores air-brushed away from their faces. To paraphrase a Mad Men fan when she was talking about the culture of the mid-1960s, when she was a kid and women wanted to look curvaceous as Marilyn and Elizabeth Taylor, she looked like Twiggy; when she developed the voluptuous curves, everyone wanted to look like Twiggy. The 1970s and 1980s was an age of self-improvement as female empowerment (feminism co-opted by capitalism) where dieting and getting thinner was seen as “bettering” oneself. Suddenly it wasn’t cool for Bridget to strut her stuff in a pencil skirt a la Joan Holloway, it wasn’t enough to be a junior partner or to create your own safety net, even the irresistible Veronica Lodge worried about her weight. 

*WARNING: Most of my sources refer to Fat Black Women but I feel like the arguments hold up here*

Then we go to Bridget and Perpetua, aside from their personality clash, Bridget is secretly envious and outwardly disgusted by how Perpetua can be much heavier than Bridget, yet wear curve-hugging clothes and go shopping and not give a shit about how her body looked. Perpetua knows that her boyfriend appreciates her good pussy under her gut! Bridget comforts herself by telling herself that happiness comes from reaching attainable goals....like changing one’s body rather than making money or procuring items....sigh Capitalism is a son of a gun. Clearly Bridget has animosity towards Perpetua for being plump and not feeling like she needs to hide for not looking like a supermodel. But why?

Fatphobia is one way of expressing internalized hatred against one’s body and their own self. In fact, Perpetua committed the sin of loving herself (or being neutral to oneself) as she is, and stands out from the rest of the cast who are obsessed with living up to certain standards to putting forward a certain image to the world that everything is fine. In a fatphobic capitalist patriarchy, it’s quite maddening that she would develop the arrogance and entitlement that she puts on display, especially because she is a...woman! Katie Wee, in her essay for Huffington Post, talked about how it was hard for her to play a fat-shaming exercise instructor in an episode of Shrill because she wouldn’t fat shame another person, but she had practice internalizing that cruelty. Wee talks about her history of eating disorders and over-exercising, all in a bid to become a ballerina, well into her twenties. Currently she works at a body-inclusive fitness studio and that Lindy West and Aidy Bryant were very encouraging in her performance. She also said:

When Annie writes her off, I made the decision that for Tanya this hits something much deeper. It’s as if Annie is saying Tanya’s life’s work is for nothing, or her religion is bullshit. Annie is feeling content in the body she is in, and for Tanya this feels like a personal attack. The subtext to what Tanya is saying is, “If I don’t get to be happy in my body, neither do you! Especially not you.”

This was also explored in the Room 104 episode “The Hikers” where college graduates and childhood best friends go on a hiking trip before they start working or looking for work. Megan (the fabulous Shannon Purser) is plump, freckled, down to earth and happy to have gotten a job offer right after she accepted her degree while her friend Casey (Kendra Carelli) is thin, has excelled on Instagram artifice, and hasn’t procured her own job yet but is triumphant over her past popularity. Yet a placed pebble in Megan’s boot reveals that Casey has been feeling disgust over how her fat friend would thrive in a larger body and not cover up and how she was burdened with making sure she was included in social gatherings growing up, soon Casey’s angry rant after Megan voiced her disgust over Casey’s sense of superiority over her reveals that Casey is angry that being conventionally beautiful and popular hasn’t made her any happier with herself or her own life, while Megan has excelled in their young adulthood in spite of her appearance and lack of popularity. Bridget is angry that Perpetua is thriving and content with her own life despite not looking a certain way while Bridget has been trying to get down to 110 lbs since she was a teenager and has been backing out of rooms after getting laid so the menfolk wouldn’t notice her behind isn’t scrawny (what would she think of Kim Kardashian’s or Nicki Minaj’s behinds?). Bridget, who poured energy into fitting an ideal of an adult woman, is miserable while Perpetua, who isn’t the “ideal woman”, is successful. 

There is also some egocentrism on Bridget’s part: she is a heroine of a rom com so the story centers on her, with her friends being mere satellites. There has been a tradition of the fat best friend who exists to support the leading lady or gent who will fall in love while the fat person gets to sass and serve as cheerleader, with no insight on their inner life. Especially if they are Black. Tee Noir noted that most of the funny fat friends tend to be more engaging and likable or just plain compelling than the conventionally attractive main character, but their characterization is often neglected, to the point of sometimes even lacking a last name. In fact society, and even fat people, are internalized towards thinking that if you don’t fit the standard of desirability (thin, white, young-ish, cis, wealthy), you have to settle for less in your relationships and in entitlements, like how Annie in Shrill goes out with a boy who is too mediocre for her, all because she got the message that a fat girl like her shouldn’t expect a hunk or even a guy who is going to treat her decently and see her as a goddess. The show centered on Annie bringing out her inner fat bitch. Bridget hears constantly from her smug married male pals that women of a certain age shouldn’t be too picky because they aren’t as attractive and fertile as younger women (ring, ring, I am calling Tarana Burke on their asses, can I be the hype man?) and that triggers her insecurities about being single and 130 something pounds. Perpetua, who is a bit older than Bridget, medically overweight, single (but with a boyfriend) and less conventionally attractive than her...and is thriving in her life with no rush to the altar and she is free to voice demands in her relationship. I guess Bridget isn’t as nice as we were supposed to think she is, no shade, but be upfront about it Bridget (or writers). 

But I can go easy on our hapless blonde, because Bridget (and probably Perpetua) internalized the notion that fat is disgusting and that women who aren’t thin enough have to shrink themselves and blend in, not causing waves. Perpetua lets us in on some hints that perhaps she is jealous of Bridget’s looks and figure, referring to her as having a “bony arse” for one, but it’s not a driving trait of her character. In her seminal book on female Baby Boom pop culture history, Where the Girls Are: Growing Up Female with the Mass Media, she noted that from a young age women were encouraged to see other women as competition, and if one woman is victorious in one area, we are defeated “And we had grown up with a notion of a female hierarchy in which some women---the Waspy, wealthy, young, and beautiful---were at the top of the pyramid and other women---the poor, the dark-skinned, the ugly, the old, the fat---were at the bottom and this is something that advertising (a source that sells Perpetua her image of wealth and sells Bridget’s insecurities) capitalizes on. Media in the 1970s have even applied the same dichotomy to some feminists where Germaine Greer (before she was all TERFy) and Gloria Steinem were held up as exceptions to the stereotype of ugly, nagging, and/or mannish feminists (something that Betty Freidan, Kate Millet, and the OG Bella Abzug got slapped with). It’s the ugly side affect of individualism.

One can hope that Bridget got the shameless and joyful spirit of that little girl who ran around the paddling pool in her underwear back. 

Who’s Afraid of “Fat ass old bags”?: Backlash against non-insecure women

“Do what you feel in your heart to be right – for you'll be criticized anyway.” Eleanor Roosevelt

Let’s be clear: arrogance isn’t confidence. I use the term “non-insecure” as an umbrella term for Perpetua and for confident women who have faced backlash for their lack of willingness to act like they are less than to appease the patriarchy. But...men get to be arrogant and admired for their drive and accomplishments, hell they don’t even have to accomplish much unless you count bankruptcies (look at who is President of the United States at the time of this writing). So why do women who act arrogantly, aggressively, cut throat, authoritative, or just plain assert their needs and personal boundaries are so vilified? So I will try to look for how we could all learn to be confident as Perpetua. 

Ever since Peggy Olson was promoted to Junior Copywriter, and even before, women in the workplace have been scrutinized from the secretarial pool to even top positions as CEO or junior partner. Like McCann-Erickson in the final season of Mad Men, Pemberley Press is something of a toxic workplace where underlings fight to get noticed for their achievements in dull lighting, men like Daniel Cleaver and Mr. Fitzherbert (more like Tits Pervert, right Bridget?) feel free to sexually harass women who haven’t developed the skills to defend themselves and demand respect, and where the characters we are closest to, don’t really like her. Women in power tend to confuse a white cis male hierarchy with a pecking order where the men try to undermine her authority either because they find her too attractive or make her feel unattractive, sometimes other women would undermine women because their success threatens their own self-image as women. A toxic workplace can also be why Bridget cannot excel at the work she does (she jumps from one toxic workplace to another in the movie); this can also be why Perpetua comes off as a hardass, she has to put up a shield to protect herself and the years working at Pemberley Press have hardened her to the point where Bridget couldn’t relate to her. 

Bridget, according to Daniel Cleaver and the viewers of the films, is likable while Perpetua is not. Bridget is very feminine, sexy, witty, self-deprecating, supportive, warm, and non-intimidating while Perpetua may be feminine (look at them pearls and long hair), she isn’t conventionally attractive as Bridget and her size and age have kept her out of the “sexy box” and while Perpetua is clever, the woman doesn’t ease her way into conversations at parties like Bridget pretty much demanding to be introduced and included in them and she walks with the ease and assumption that she belongs everywhere she goes. Perpetua just also isn’t cuddly, but men get to be aloof like Mark to the point of being insulting or irreverent like Daniel to the point of toxicity, why is Perpetua being judged so harshly for traits that we see in these two high-status men? Forbes magazine once quoted that women are affected by two types of bias at work: prescriptive and descriptive bias. 

Descriptive bias is the labels we attach and associate with certain social groups and communities, and prescriptive bias is how they are expected to behave. And, when someone does not conform to these prescribed roles and behaviors they can be penalized or punished. Women, for instance, are traditionally expected to be caring, warm, deferential, emotional, sensitive, and so on, and men are expected to be assertive, rational, competent and objective. So, when it comes to promotion, these traits are sometimes automatically prescribed to people as per their gender without detailed information about their personalities, thereby a man, in general, is assumed to be a better fit as a leader.

The other side of this is prescriptive bias is when a woman does not fit the role that is traditionally assigned to her and attempts to claim a traditionally male position is seen as breaking the norm. So, when a woman is decisive, she might be perceived as "brusque" and "abrupt". Therefore, for the same kind of leadership behavior, women might be penalized while a man is commended.

Women who are traditionally feminine (passive, self-effacing, caring), are considered “likable” but not leadership material while women who display traditionally masculine traits (assertiveness, self-preservation, ambition) are considered ball-busters. Both women are less likely to get promoted because of both bias, while what’s “bossy”  or, sometimes, “hysterical” for women, get’s men promoted (*cough* Brett Kavanaugh crying that he likes beer *cough*). Women who help out at work aren’t seen for what those caring and proactive qualities can benefit the workplace, it’s expected that a woman would be so domestic. Even female candidates for Head of State are subjected to the tyranny of likability....for a position where the focus has to be on achieving safety and stability for a nation, even if no one likes them, a position that will be decisive no matter what they do. The work can be done by women supporting one another and both genders checking their biases at the door. Men can call out another man for describing their appropriately authoritative female boss as a “bitch” and women can examine why other women demanding more in their relationships or being promiscuous is so threatening to them. Women can even decide who takes turns at office domestic tasks like making coffee and getting birthday cards signed, making it a universal effort by the work site and network with each other as they celebrate each other’s triumphs and different traits.  

Bridget’s passivity doesn’t help her in being taken seriously at work by her male peers either. Whereas Perpetua is disparaged for being older, heavier, and less conventionally attractive as she is criticized for being authoritative, Bridget is reduced to her sex appeal by Daniel to her face and even described as “fannying about with the press releases” (hearing about this treatment incenses Perpetua to Bridget’s side), thereby reducing Bridget’s femininity into something frivolous and not a endearing trait that helps her navigate the world. Bridget has proved in a deleted scene that she can give a brilliant advertising pitch for a horror novel, sadly the assignment was for a children’s book but it was maddening that the men wouldn’t give Bridget that credit (watch it, I can see Peggy Olson smiling somewhere). Bridget is also hampered by what is called “Imposter Syndrome”: according to Wikipedia, it “is a psychological pattern in which an individual doubts their skills, talents or accomplishments and has a persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a 'fraud'” despite have external skills and a number of accomplishments. Aside from her own appearance, Bridget puts her own abilities and intellect down, and it’s no surprise as how her society puts an emphasis on the physical appearance of women: “If you've grown up with messages that you're only valued for your looks and your body, not your skills or intelligence, you may end up getting a certain job or position and wondering whether you truly deserve it or if the hiring manager just thought you were a pretty face”, said clinical psychologist Emily Hu for the BBC (not to mention it’s much harder for women of color who deal with their cultural expectations and prejudice from a white supremacist patriarchy). Bridget’s own outrageous mother hasn’t passed down her bolder traits to her daughter and often makes Bridget feel small as she berates her for “not getting your colours done” or being unmarried. 

In a world where tomboys and girly girls are pitted against each other, what would have happened if Perpetua and Bridget have let go of their preconceived notions of one another? Perpetua does seem to see Bridget as more than “blonde hair and big boobs”. It’s worth seeing that when the Bustle wrote about how to combat workplace misogyny, that they emphasized how important it was to support other women in the workplace as Perpetua did for Bridget at the last minute, alongside feeling free to disagree with men and demand a raise. Once again I want to note, Bridget and Perpetua are both white cis able-bodied women from upper-middle class backgrounds, so if their professional journey is fraught just imagine what it’s like for women of color. 

Tough Women

“You can stand me up at the gates of hell. But I won't back down.” I Won’t Back Down, Tom Petty  

Bridget learns, as we all do, and like Perpetua might have done that if she wanted to overcome her issues, she really has to confront her own discomfort and take risks as she demands more from life. Perpetua is a tough woman: she doesn’t appear to soften, even when she is greeting Bridget or Mark Darcy, who she is impressed by and she seems to encourage Natasha’s efforts to snatch him up. Granted a woman like Perpetua probably learned she had to tough, if she wanted to make it in a male-dominated workspace, I would not be surprised if she had parents who instilled a sense of ambition and toughness in her from a young age, or like Megan from Bridesmaids, she had to deal with a childhood of bullying and took that pain to transform herself into a formidable character.

We also see from her confrontation with Daniel, she isn’t afraid to get harsh with a powerful man especially after she finds out that he has been using a female employee sexually and been denigrating her worth at the office. 

We don’t know Perpetua’s physical prowess and she clearly prefers pearls to combat boots, but she does possess traits that are associated with men: logical mind, firm, self-reliant, witty, sharp-minded, a professional in a cutthroat environment, and is flawed while being formidable. Perpetua is strong, a Shonda Rhimes character that Rhimes herself hasn’t created. Sadly like most Tough Girls, she isn’t her own protagonist and is there as an accessory to the main character, the Trinity to The Matrix’s Neo and she is often the lone woman that Bridget interacts with at work. Tough Girls are counterparts to more “typical” women: traditionally feminine women who are softer and more emotional...Bridgets. One thing I want to note is that Bridget is the protagonist instead of a love interest but yet she stands alone as her friendships are not that positive and her relationship with her mother is strained. Like Ripley of the Alien series, Perpetua is the lone smart and strong woman who has to deal with a environment where no one else wants to listen to her and everyone is ruled by their emotions (or their libido). She is Joan Holloway, who weathers the misogynistic waters with her razor-sharp observations and commentary regarding the absurdities of the people who are around her, while not being afraid to command attention and others, even at the risk at not being truly liked but “admired”. Not a phony. Perpetua is a privileged woman but like I stated before, she dealt with a combination of body-shaming and misogyny that toughened her...but why should a woman be tough and hurt? We could have had a scene where Bridget encourages Perpetua to reveal her vulnerabilities and open up along with Perpetua pushing her to be more resilient over a spa day with face masks, pedicures, beer, Milk Trays, pizza, Terminator movies, and hair makeovers while discussing how to hide Uncle Geoffrey’s body.

Strong Independent Women

“The watch I'm wearin', I've bought it. The house I live in, I've bought it. The car. I'm driving, I've bought it. I depend on me, I depend on me.” Independent Women, Destiny’s Child

Imagine trying to reconcile feminist principles of not depending on male partners and rugged individualism that insists the opposite of what John Donne’s quote about how one person is a party of a larger community. You have the Strong Independent Woman, who is used by capitalism to sell feminism and face cream/Spanx/sanitary napkins/Wonderbras/lipstick, who needs no man (or interdependence) to thrive in a still misogynistic world. This misogynistic world also abhors the independence, self-assurance, self-reliance, and self-love of women who choose to follow their path. Meanwhile the non-mainstream feminist and environmental movement have pushed for a culture of interdependence and for a culture that doesn’t base one’s value on how much money or genius or beauty (or what have you) an individual possesses; Bella Abzug noted that “Our struggle today is not to have a female Einstein get appointed as an assistant professor. It is for a woman schlemiel to get as quickly promoted as a male schlemiel”.

But the image of the female individualist for one strong reason: women are still expected to perform the bulk of emotional and domestic labor while being paid less than their male peers for the same job, also because of ingrained sexism and perpetuated self-doubt, many women are still dependent on their spouses, parents, bosses, the opinions of others. It’s nice to see images of powerful, strong, often gorgeous women of wealth not have to depend on men for their worth or their livelihood. But we are flesh-and-blood human beings, not super beings or robots; even Perpetua shows some vulnerability when she refers to Bridget being a lot thinner than she and she is clearly looks crestfallen when she hears that Bridget has been belittled and used for her body by Daniel, we don’t hear much about her circle of friends in the movie aside from Natasha (in the book, she is friends with some same-minded women). Everyone needs an interdependent society of people supporting one another and helping each other grow. 

Perpetua both upholds and subverts the tenets of the Independent Woman: she isn’t the supermodel-esque independent woman but Perpetua makes her own money and at lot of it, she dresses very well to project her authority in the workplace, she is bold, rejects the validation of male authority, and she isn’t afraid to be unlikable. She lives in a big city (because independent and single people don’t live in small towns or the suburbs *sarcasm*), presumably in her own spacious apartment or even a townhouse, she has found herself at some point before the story and has a strong sense of self, she works hard and has a strong sense of purpose because of her work ethic, and heaven help the dumbass that underestimates her or any other woman. She is a non-superpowered Carol Danvers: rather than waiting for someone to rescue her, she is quick to rescue herself from self-doubt or even rescue someone from injustice. She is noted to have a love interest, but she doesn’t revolve her world around him and is suggested to make demands for her needs in the relationship, showing she isn’t prone to fuckwittage as Bridget is (perhaps Perpetua learned to put a stop to that bullshit?). Of course because this is Bridget’s story, a woman who yearns for that fairytale ending of marriage, and this is a regressive, “post-feminist” (what sense does that make?) story, Perpetua isn’t a role model and is seen as a polar opposite to Bridget’s softness, ditziness, girliness, romanticism, and self-effacing persona.

I want to stop and say that I am so happy to be writing this essay in 2020, a year in which a large number of women (especially of color) have been elected to political office in record numbers with the Indian and Jamaican American Kamala Harris being elected as Vice President of the United States (and the first woman to do so). She is also independent enough to make her own money and develop her sense of self, along with a strong sense of agency and inter-dependent enough to credit the support and love she has from her blended family including her late mother. In fact the independent women of Broad City, Sex and the City, The Mary Tyler Moore Show, Moana, Mulan, and GLOW (crossing self) all have inter-dependent systems of support and are one another’s family (hell even Bridget’s so-called friends are her “Urban Family”). I also want to say, it’s highly likely that Kamala was more a Perpetua and not a Bridget (or else she wouldn’t have been able to succeed like she has done in her career), thus her win as Vice President vindicates Perpetuas who have worked and lived before her. 

Working Women Do’s and Don’ts

“You're just a step on the boss man's ladder. But you got dreams he'll never take away.” 9 to 5, Dolly Parton

As established, Perpetua is happily single (but also partnered), she fulfilled in material comforts, she is unafraid to confront men about their bullshit (she has a hard time trying to get Fitzherbert away, I bet), and she has high standards. To paraphrase Charlotte Pickles, to thrive where she works she has to “eat, breathe, and sweat self-esteem” and she does. This is something that Bridget lacks and something I feel Perpetua can help her with. Sadly we never got that chance: the gentle and feminine Bridget and the stern and neutral Perpetua bonding in a mutually beneficial kinship. I’m sure that Perpetua wishes she could talk back to men like Julia Sugarbaker of Designing Women and that her role models came after some viewings of Working Girl, Baby Boom, and Murphy Brown and perhaps by the privileged and successful men (and a few women) in her family. It must be said that despite being referred to and clearly existing, we never see Perpetua’s boyfriend and that’s because pop culture has long depicted women in managerial and supervisory positions as lonely, ice-cold, unfeminine, and hard. Meanwhile more feminine women like Bridget don’t get the respect that Perpetua has and demands, and Perpetua lacks Bridget’s likability (Bridget of the many men and one woman who fall in love with her). While I wouldn’t consider Perpetua to be politically progressive (she is a woman of privilege and Sloan Rangers are considered Tories) but she isn’t a woman who is willing to exploit others for her own bottom line (or the corner office). We do see that she is quick to defend Bridget from slut-shaming or having her worth denigrated by Daniel, which leads to a rare scene of comcaderie between her and Bridget. I get the sense that Perpetua isn’t merely interested in ruling the workplace, but she wants to change the workplace enough to be less toxic (getting rid of Daniel and Fitzherbert). 

I can find some similarities to Perpetua in three fictional characters known for their drive in the workplace: Dr. Christina Yang (Grey’s Anatomy), Peggy Olson (Mad Men), and Princess Carolyn (Bojack Horseman). Christina Yang, like her creator Shonda Rhimes (if you are reading this Ms. Rhimes or someone writing or interning for her, please feel free to take ideas for a film or show about Perpetua, I need cheddar), is proudly childfree, dominant, blunt, up for a good time, and voraciously sexual and ambitious. Like Perpetua, she doesn’t aim to please others and very performative in her actions and words along with being caring and brusque (and snarky, especially about the terrifying Mr. Blobby). Also like Perpetua, Yang finds comcaderie with a bubbly young blonde who is sometimes reduced to her beauty (Izzy as played by Katherine Heigel) and tries to lift her girl friends up. While Perpetua has been working in a post Cold War publishing company, Peggy Olson is a young woman from Brooklyn working at a advertising agency in the 1960s, with different struggles from her more “sexier” counterpart (Joan is a more confident Bridget after all, and Peggy has some BJ traits). Peggy is also a trailblazer for assertive working women of today and paved the way for Perpetua across the pond, setting an example from the ground up (partly observing the men above her) when she wasn’t able to find much female role models that didn’t rely on their sexuality or follow a traditional path. Women during that time didn’t have reproductive freedom, equal pay (still, sigh), and working women were shamed for wanting to follow a different path. Peggy also deals with fatphobia in Season One (she was actually pregnant) and divorced herself from her sexuality temporarily (but she experiments with sex and drugs throughout the series). Like Peggy, Perpetua isn’t crippled by Don Draper’s self-loathing (Bridget) or lack of discipline (Daniel) and Perpetua had to learn to believe in herself rather than merely rely on the validation of others. Princess Carolyn is a pink, perky, girly girl cat but like Perpetua she has a relentless drive, is intelligent, hard-working, can sell something (a celebrity image or books), and knows how to positively influence certain people around her. All these women have lived by their own self-definitions and owned the struggles they endured to get ahead. 

Can’t Be Tamed

Walter Stratford: Hello, Katarina. Make anyone cry today?

Katarina Stratford: Sadly, no. But it's only 4:30. 10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

Rom Coms (such as Bridget Jones’s Diary) have a nasty habit of wanting to tame, soften, tone down, settle down an independent woman with her strong mind, sharp tongue, active sex life, and own money to matrimony. Then we have heroines who are allowed to fly their freak flag and find their own tribe (or leading man). That is Kat Stratford, the teenage feminist protagonist of 10 Things I Hate About You, a girl that Perpetua would have been at that age if she were American with blonde, pretty privilege. After all Perpetua has been perceived by Bridget (a Bianca without wit or spine) as a “heinous bitch” as delivered by the fabulous Allison Janney; they are perceived as difficult women who rain down their parades with their truth and don’t suffer the foolishness of arrogant men. Such women are supposed to be tamed, which has several meanings. The negative being to “tone down” or “dominate”; an alternate definition has been offered by The Little Prince’s fox “to earn one’s trust”.

We don’t know if Perpetua has anyone, romantic or platonic, to complement her personality and balance her out as Natasha seems to have Perpetua’s negative traits. This is where she and Bridget could have developed a friendship, combining vulnerability and a disdain for the fickle opinions of others and keep from having to choose between love and career, between relationships and financial independence. We could have seen a closer relationship blossom over the story just as Bianca and Kat grow closer to one another in the film. Maybe Bridget demanding more from Mark at the end, telling him that just because he bought her a new diary it doesn’t mean that he can get away with walking away from her and that it makes up for how tight-assed he can be with Perpetua cheering her on and another scene where Bridget smiles and let’s Perpetua squees over something in excitement. 

Like Kat, the Perpetuas can find their own tribes or mates. 

Women of Privilege in Media

Rich bitches, girl bosses, sassy queens, matriarchs, as Christopher Rosa noted about these women (which includes Perpetua): "They're rude, they're loaded, and we love them for it.” In a world that hates empowered women, as bell hooks bluntly noted, these Regina Georges, Cheryl Blossoms, Alexis Carringtons, and Perpetuas take back that slur and wrap it up in designer couture and fabulous accessories with nary a hair out of place. They own the negative stereotypes and manicure it into an image of fearlessness. They reject the social pressures placed on women to be nice no matter what, likable, fade into the background, and talk themselves down. Rich bitches indulge themselves with no apology and wear their strengths as boldly as their statement jewelry. But what if you don’t want to be bitchy all the time, what if you want to channel that fierceness into something constructive? 

#Girlboss is an atom and a half: traditionalists argue that she isn’t a proper “feminine” woman who loses out on heterosexual love and children (”true womanhood”) while many feminists argue that she simply advanced to a seat in the patriarchy and doesn’t give a damn about the little people below her enough to truly make positive changes. Pop Culture has four flavors of the this character, as noted by The Take: the Bitch Boss, the Pre Code Boss who acts the way we think women started acting like after 1968, the Feminine Boss, and the social media savvy Girlboss who starts companies with cutesy names like WAHAM or WEEMAN or GOOP and they are often white and conventionally attractive. The last flavor exploits feminist phrases while selling out to capitalism and patriarchy for women to buy more shit and willing to step on people’s heads while building her empire. Sometimes she’s Charlotte Pickles, a somewhat ruthless but loving mother and CEO who loves angora sweaters, is glued to her phone, and can effectively hit the roof of a overturned boat with her high heel. Perpetua may seem standoffish to care only about her bottom line or take on traditionally masculine traits like Ruth Chatterton in Female or Diane Keaton in Baby Boom, but she proves to be a Leslie Knope when she stands up for Bridget in a heated moment. Perpetua has no necessity for large pink letters or catchphrases to prove she is a powerful (and empowered) woman, she simply is. One can see Perpetua taking over Pemberley Press, first Daniel’s job and then ousting Fitzherbert and taking his position, thus ousting misogyny from that workplace and using her power to uplift more voices in writing. 

Bridget and Perpetua, meet, Betty and Veronica (respectively). While the Bridget the Nice Girl avoids her issues (and Betty can be in danger of being subsumed by them), Veronica and Perpetua make their rules and are willing to break them. Like Perpetua, the teenage Veronica wears her posh prep clothes proudly with a string of pearls and headbands holding her shiny hair. Veronica is also confronting a system (and family legacy) that taints America and makes living so impossible for people who have no boots to pull the straps from and handicaps her to a pedestal. Perpetua seems to want her friend Natasha to snap up Mark Darcy (remember she knows nothing of Mark and Bridget) like Veronica in the CW reboot wanted Betty to do with Archie. Both want to work hard and be recognized for their merit, not wanting to depend solely on Daddy’s money, bucking long-standing patriarchal expectations of upper-class young women who were expected to marry a man from a similar class and have children to inherit the money. Perpetua and Veronica show a willingness to get down and dirty while being allies to their less privileged and/or more passive female comrades. They also wield their power to take down over-puffed authority figures who abuse their privilege and have attitude when a woman gets slut-shamed or otherwise mistreated. Remember Daniel and Mr. Titspervert, Perpetua’s specialty is ice.

Legally Blonde and Bridesmaids, etc. 

Vivian Kensington. Elle Woods. Professor Stromwell. These women showcase an alternative where cold but supportive women befriend our plucky blonde protagonist in a Playboy bunny suit and a douchebag ex-boyfriend (before ending up with a lawyer who comes off as uptight). Legally Blonde gifted Elle camaraderie with these women while Perpetua was left at the wayside and Elle was given a circle of supportive friends while Bridget had friends who negged her and were a poor influence on her confidence. Where Delta Nu gave Elle their time to help her practice for the LSATS, Bridget’s friends openly wonder out loud that Mark Darcy said he likes Bridget as she is, ditziness and unfashionable (of the time) curves and non-airbrushed looks (really?). We also see Elle add more people to her friend circle, like the working-class Paulette who proves to be mutually supportive of Elle and has been empowered by her to stand up to her ex and then we focus on two women who stand in for Perpetua: the steely Professor Stromwell ( the Mrs. Sarah Paulson, Holland Taylor) and the preppy  Vivian Kensington (Selma Blair, la diva). Vivian and Elle start out as rivals for the handsome but douchey Warner Huntington III, who categorizes these women as the wife material Jackie and the fun and hot-tubbing Marilyn, but slowly upon finding out that their professor is a sexist who demands his young interns get him coffee and that Warner lacks Elle’s integrity find some common ground. Vivian is horrified and takes back her previous behavior upon hearing that their professor has sexually harassed Elle, reducing this intelligent and savvy young woman to her sex appeal. Also Professor Stromwell puts Elle on the spot on her first day of classes at and has a reputation for making her students sob, but it’s implied that Stromwell sees a bit of herself in Elle and wants this young woman to succeed and that means challenging her to do the hard work in Harvard. In the climax of the film, when Elle discusses quitting Harvard because of people undervaluing her intellect and being sexually harassed as a final straw, Stromwell turns around in her salon chair and tells Elle: “If you let one male prick ruin your life, you’re not the girl I thought you were.” Stromwell gets credit in Elle’s valedictorian speech at the end of the film. We see here that while Elle upholds girliness and finds new love in a established lawyer, unlike Bridget she has a support system of women (and a few men) who encourage her to kick ass and challenge the perceptions of others and celebrate her triumph in defending someone from a life-altering sentence. 

I feel that in 2001, either Annie Mumulo or Kristen Wiig watched BJD and found the relationship between Bridget and Megan wanting as well as I did, this likely spurred them into writing Bridesmaids, a film that centered on women fighting over a best friend rather than a man, where the male love interest listened to the protagonist vent about her friend issues, and where an overweight and unconventional female secondary character pushes our insecure everywoman protagonist to start fighting for her goals and her sense of self, or rather her “shitty life”. Annie (Kirsten Wiig) is a former owner of a bakery that fell victim to the 2008 recession who is hitting rock bottom as her childhood best friend gets engaged and starts befriending her fiancee’s boss’s preened to perfection wife Helen (Rose Byrne)  and then finds comfort and motivation in the form of the fiancee’s wacky sister Megan (Melissa McCarthy). Annie gets loonier as the movie goes on (ahem) until Megan persuades her to channel that spirit more constructively; Megan is proud of her hard-earned achievements and is confident but also kind enough to adopt several puppies and see Annie at her lowest. Megan earns her own money and demands more from her relationships than the other women in the movie (unhappy marriages, lack of communication, lack of trust) and emboldens Annie to grab life by the horns, thus starting a new friendship. It’s notable that this film is about post-college aged adults and the role of friendships in their lives.

Perpetua’s Potential

The 2010s have shown more narratives that focused on women’s relationships with one another and have even re-defined what “happily ever after” looks like and as a result of the #MeToo and #TimesUp Movements, women have examined how toxic their culture is to women and finding that the harassment and assault of women to be terrifyingly normalized and it has been for a long time. Millennial and Gen Z women have even questioned the issue of pitting women against each other, one of which is the “not like other girls” attitude that pits the cool babe or the weird girl against the high-maintenance girly girls that easily conform to society (even rewriting these types as friends or lovers to one another). 

So what does that mean for Bridget Jones’s Diary? Well we could see a B Plot on Mark Darcy and his divorce from his Japanese ex-wife and she’d be given her own inner life and complexities, Perpetua might have to reconcile her relationship with Bridget and Natasha (the latter who is hostile to the former), we could see Perpetua strike up a friendship with her polar opposite Bridget and the narrative could focus on Bridget helping Perpetua open up her softer side while Perpetua gives Bridget the encouragement to stand up to her (admittedly) trashy family and friends and demand more from her relationship with Mark (or even dump him). We can even see them include Rebecca Gillies, the beautiful trust fund baby that works for Mark and finds Bridget to be desirable as she is (without being backhanded about it Mark!). We can see Bridget become stronger as she has one friend who challenges her to be better and another friend who finds her supremely wonderful and gets her to see it. 

Maybe we can see Uncle G die, a girl can dream.

The Rise of the Perpetuas or what happened after Bridget drank some of Perpetua’s Juice

#MeToo, #TimesUp, #BossBitch, Lizzo, Ariana Grande, Lady Gaga, Katy Perry, Beyonce, Hillary Clinton, Alexandra Ocasio-Cortez, Ilhan Omar, the Notorious (and late) Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Jacinda Ardern, Michelle Obama, Jameela Jamil, Mindy Kaling, Tiffany Ferg, Kimberly Nicole Foster, Dahvi Waller, Gretchen Whitmer, #BlackGirlsAreMagic, Mothers of the Movement, CaShawn Thompson, Intersectional Feminism, Black Feminism, Mad Men, Mrs. America, Insecure, The Baby Sitters Club, Amy Schumer, GLOW, Emma Gonzalez, Candice Carty Williams, Malala Yousafzai, Kamala Harris, Meghan Markle...all of them have grappled with issues like Bridget and Perpetua and have even expanded the conversation about women’s day to day lives and the small (and large) ways society is misogynistic and have gone further to question why it’s so commonplace. We even see a talk about body neutrality (as opposed to the sanitized body positivity), which one can easily see Perpetua practicing. We also see women being held up in social media as being “stanned” for being difficult, wonderful, achievement oriented, sassy, fierce, outspoken, demanding, and fashionable...all things that Perpetua was put down for. 

“I just took a DNA test, turns out I'm 100% that bitch

Even when I'm crying crazy

Yeah, I got boy problems, that's the human in me

Bling bling, then I solve 'em, that's the goddess in me” Truth Hurts, Lizzo

To paraphrase Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?: All this time, they could have been friends. 

The year 2020 has been a dismal year for women’s careers as women are swamped with the demands of domestic life and bosses have shown that they won’t cut their employees slack for having kids in the background. People even explored how the pandemic has revealed cracks in society from economic disparity, how women are ultimately shouldered with the burdens of home that men aren’t expected to, how vulnerable marginalized communities are in systems with poor health care and systemic bigotry, and the lack of a social safety net. These are challenges I see Gen X, Millennial, and Gen Z women pushing back against (I will show up, pussy hat and mask on my person). One can even see Bridget, the ex Mrs. Darcy, Perpetua, and Rebecca marching in their Women’s March or even the global Black Lives Matter marches as they cheer on (or help) “tipped” over statues of colonizers and slave traders. We’d even see them attend virtual seminars on how to be better allies to BIPOC and listen as ex Mrs. Darcy talked about her difficulties as a East Asian woman in a predominantly white society and Bridget promising to call out her mother for her racist comments. There’d be no good woman/bad-woman dichotomy being perpetuated as they embrace each other’s differences. 

[gay-slabies]

mod & character introductions!!

Hello, and welcome to our Countryhuman’s Ask Blog! This blog is one in which the mods (and there are eight of us) each have certain characters who we will write and draw for, meaning that asks geared towards certain characters will also be geared towards certain mods! The vague plot is that the characters all live together in one big house and just sort of vibe... This isn’t supposed to get too serious, y’know! 

Below the cut are everyone’s intros! Make sure to read them, because we all worked hard to get this blog up and running and we would like to be able to meet you all! The nicknames come from our Discord server, by the way, in case you were wondering about the oddity. 

The blog also only follows any of the mods who have a Tumblr, so check the Following list if you want to talk with us one-on-one!!

hi im cursed and im the person who cant draw for shit because i hvae to laptop with mousepad. Well ma'am, the lab results came back and This is hard to say but Your son tested highly on our simp scale Oh goodness gracious But doctor, what does it even mean to be a simp? Well son, allow me to explain- (Nacho: Cursed has America, Mexico, and Australia)

Hey, I’m Mango! As listed in the description, my pronouns are she/her. My acc is @strangled-mangoes if you have any personal questions :). The countries I’m doing are Estonia and Spain. Estonia is very chaotic,, shorts in the snow, crocs with socks... you know that guy I’m talking about. The “It’s not even that cold” guy,, him. (The poison. The poison for kuzco. The poison chosen especially to kill kuzco. Kuzco’s poison). Now Spain... he’s a little different. Okay, a lot different. He’s basically an ex-homophobe turned gay and is now protesting for trans rights. Sorry if that’s a little confusing, I’m bad at summarizing things haha

Hello!! I’m Moderator Nacho, the father of these hellchildren! I am Exe’s husband, but don’t let father and husband disallude you- I am biologically and mentally female uwu. Yes I use uwu. Call me a furry all you want. Your words are like bites from a baby that hasn’t grown teeth yet. Disgusting and harmless. ANYWHO, I am one who tends to go off on a tangent, but can still structure out a plot, as well as being more than willing to give people Big Answers to their asks!!!! Also... apparently I apologize too much. Besides all of that, the countries I will be answering asks for are as follows: Lithuania, The United Arab Emirates, China, Northern Native America, and Russia. If I misrepresent a country in a way you don’t agree with, then feel free to tell me! I will gladly listen and take what you say into account, especially if you are ethnically or religiously knowledgable on the country. My Lithuania... is a bit of a bitch, plain and simple, but it’s kinda valid, since he is Very Old. My UAE is a difficult bow to unravel- He’s very bigoted towards anything LGBT+, but Something happens to change that :). My China is non-binary and like 4000 years old... He’ll fuck anything that moves if he can convince it into bed, but he is also very formal and polite when he wants to be. My Native America is actually just the northern half, and she is... chaotic, to say the least. My Russia? Himbo. That’s all I need to say. He’s the very definition of a himbo. Look up himbo in the dictionary and it’s just a page full of pictures of Russia.

Hi yes hello, I'm Satan, and I say trans rights. I'm the only irish lad with these lads, and you already know my pronouns, they/them. I'll be doing Russian Empire and The Soviet Union, R.E has much inner homophobia, and Sov tries (and fails) to be badass. You cant run from being fluffy. And I'm also ace, and into girls uwu.(my least favourite skittle is purple)

Greetings all, I’m Mod Exe. You could also just go to call me the German-Soviet, young kinda boomer mother of like; 15 kids with a cat and a she/her husband. My pronouns are they/them with the occasional she/her mixed in. I’m tryna figure stuff out. I’m one out of three European Mods (Mod Satan and Mod Corn)! I might misspell stuff because out of all these freaks here, I’m the only one whose first language is not English. I apologize in advance. The countries I will doodle and answer asks from are West Germany, Third Reich, German Empire (Second Reich) and The Weimar Republic. My headcanons for them might be weird but hey, isn’t that literally all of us? That’s all I wanted to say already! Sincerely, Exe.

Hehejehehhehe Mod Void here! I’m your local otaku who knows absolutely almost nothing about the outside world, and is also Canasain. I draw a lot, and if you want to check out my underdeveloped and only just started ‘art’ blog, it’s @bluevoid27 . As stated in the description, She/Her pronouns! I’m also in charge of these beans: Antarctica, Greenland, Canada, Philippines, and Martial. My take on these characters may be a bit different from the most popular versions. Antarctica is still bean, but is presumably hiding a less pure version. Greenland is well, kind of overprotective of Antarctica, but is still a nice child who’s also NB. Canada is probably the one who’s been altered the most, let me tell ya, in Canada, we aren’t as nice as the stereotypes, so this version is a bit more reckless, still loves syrup, and has some sort of trouble showing he’s sorry (wow what a surprise!). Philippines is your classic Pinoy, karaoke master, hopeless jokester, and just a carefree dude in general. Martial is your angry Pinoy, with threats like “Gusto mo palo?” while holding up a sandal. He still resembles somewhat of his brother, but is way more aggressive and rough on the edges. Salutations, I’m Moderator Discord (no, not MLP, but the actual Apphuman)! As stated in the description, my pronouns are they/them/she/her (although I prefer they/them the majority of the time). I know way too many memes and vines for my own good, and I also have rather unusual headcanons! My account is @statehumans-maryland in case you have any personal questions, and the Countryhumans I will be doing are East Germany, South Korea, and Poland! • East Germany is a soft boi who loves his sister, West Germany, and h̶a̶s̶ ̶a̶ ̶b̶i̶g̶ ̶f̶a̶t̶ ̶c̶r̶u̶s̶h̶ ̶o̶n̶ likes his best friend, Poland! He is basically one of the most innocent and wholesome people you will find on this planet — plus, he’s a farmer’s boy, so that’s neat! • South Korea is someone who is rather worn down from the shenanigans with his brother (North Korea) causing all sorts of trouble and not exactly having the relationship with him, but he’s overall a very cheerful person (though he does well at concealing his inner turmoil) who is generally friendly with others and more than willing to take responsibility for his brother’s actions, as well as deal with the consequences for such actions (even though it’s very unjustified and unnecessary). He also has a polyamorous relationship with Martial Law and Japan. • Poland is the epitome of a gentleman and will never hesitate to correct himself should he make the slightest of what he perceives as “mistakes” in his mannerisms (though he’s very slowly slipping out of it because c’mon, this is 2020, ain’t nobody got time for formalities). Overall, he is a very good friend to have, has a fair bit of anxiety, and h̶a̶s̶ ̶d̶e̶e̶p̶ ̶f̶e̶e̶l̶i̶n̶g̶s̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶b̶e̶s̶t̶ ̶f̶r̶i̶e̶n̶d̶ is very close friends with East Germany.

Mod Corn is currently busy, but has given us permission to add their intro later, so look for that!

[emsartwork]

If you’re comfortable with sharing, it would be cool to hear more about your winx next gen, if that’s okay with you?

Yes of course!!!! below the cut cus i get rambley

the story so far: Daphne and Thoren are king and queen of domino. Ashia and Nex are king and queen of Andros. Sky and Bloom are king and queen of Eraklyon. Stella and Brandon are queen and king of Solaria. Tecna was queen of Zenith for a while but got bored and decided to do something else, now she and Timmy run an exploration research company that explores the outer reaches of the magix dimension. Flora is the potions teacher at Alfea, Helia runs a small art gallery in Magix city. Musa started her own record company, and Riven became the assistant combat instructor at Red Fountain. Icy broke Tritannus out of mer-prison and transformed his tail into legs, the two are now in hiding along with Darcy. Stormy left the Trix after an issue with Icy. 

THE CHILDREN:

alrighty lets start off with Sky and Bloom, or Skoom as I like to call them. This is Aidan.  He attends Novatan University, a new school now on Magix. He’s a classically trained necromancer but will use magic in just about any way he can. He uses the tile of Necromancer of Ash.  Aidan does not posses the dragon flame, and boy is he angry about that. Though he gets along with his cousin Ophelia pretty well, he is intensely jealous of her destiny as bearer of the dragon flame, and to compensate he seeks power above his own and some times other’s safety. Aiden is loud, prickly, and easy to rile up, but cools down quickly and forgets about whatever made him angry. Bloom, in true Bloom fashion, generally avoids her son because she doesn’t know how to deal with his attitude (he also occasionally reminds her of Valtor and that scares the hell out of her). Sky does his best to spend time with and curb Aidan’s more destructive impulses but he also has to rule his kingdom. Aidan basically only gets along with Ophelia, he can hang out with Selene and Jack occasionally but they tend to annoy him. He and Thorn do NOT get along. 

Daphne and Thoren!!! Daphen? Thorphne? idk their names don’t mesh that well lol. any ways this is Ophelia. Ophelia attends Alfea and is known far and wide as fairy of the dragon flame. After Daphne became pregnant, she had to ask bloom to return the dragon flame to the royal line of Domino since its always been passed down from one heir to the next. Bloom(after a few emotional breakdowns) eventually transferred the dragon flame to tiny fetus Ophelia. Ophelia doesn’t want it. She doesn’t really tell any one, but she hates being the bearer of the dragon flame. She hate the attention, the pressure, the legacy, the kidnapping attempts, the random attacks, the fact that she’s always the target. Ophelia isn’t even sure she wants to be queen of Domino in the future. in her free time Ophelia writes stories. Ophelia shoves her feelings down, holds grudges, and she can be VERY passive aggressive. When she finally explodes she can very destructive and cruel. Ophelia loves her cousin Aidan but can’t spend a lot of time with him because she can eventually feel the jealousy streaming off of him. She gets along really well with Anemone, but when they do fight its Armageddon. She also gets along really well with Thorn, as they’re both level headed older sibling types.  

Timmy and Tecna!!!(Tecmy?) I know. She looks nothing like either of them.This is Ruth, Timmy and Tecna’s adopted daughter(they have actually adopted several other children but Ruth is the oldest and most important to the plot). When Ruth was about 10, her family’s ship crashed on a tiny desert planet in an uninhabited solar system. Her parents didn’t make it, and Ruth herself was severely injured. She managed to stem the flow of blood from the gashes in her shoulder and thigh, and cobbled together a radio system from the pieces of the ship. Timmy and Tecna were out on an scientific exploration mission when they picked up her distress signal. Infection had already set into her deeper wounds and her arm and leg had to be amputated. Ruth uses a prosthetic leg in day to day life, but prefers not to have a regular prosthetic for her arm. Ruth attended and graduated from Cloud Tower, and is the Witch of Metals, she manipulates metal into a movable prosthetic arm when she needs to, but doesn’t maintain it as its a drain of her magic. Ruth is Koyuvian(a fake planet/race thats in my version of winx club) and wears the tinted glasses to filter light. Ruth is a mechanic, and loves to build different contraptions. She’s hopeless at coding, but builds a lot of prototypes for her adoptive parents. She gets along Selene the best. 

Flora and Helia! Floria!!! (Helora?) This is Thorn. Thorn is Silva Lynphean and a quarter Vaonaaj. He attends Red Fountain and is a team lead in his class and possibly the strongest. Thorn is quiet and sarcastic, generally preferring a books to spending time around people. He’s a little awkward when not in a “specialist” situation. he kind of wishes he was really good with people, but also doesn’t bother practicing socializing because he’s scared lmao he’s basically Mr. Darcy from Pride and Prejudice. to compensate for his social ineptitude, Thorn hangs out with Jack a lot. He is very observant though and can pin point people’s weaknesses in a snap, and he’s not shy about using those weakness if he needs to.  He and Ophelia get along well, but he thinks Aidan is a spoiled brat who throws too many temper tantrums. 

Musa and Riven = Riva. So this is Jack. Jack attends Red Fountain. Jack loves to be the center of attention, and hides all of his insecurities behind an over the top inflated ego. He isn’t terribly interested in his dad’s career (fighting) or his mom’s career (music) but he is decently talented at both. Jack true passion is design. He isn’t totally sure the type of design he wants to do yet, but fashion and architecture are both interesting to him. He’s the best or the worst dressed guy at Red Fountain depending on who you ask, considering he usually throws together items that don’t seem like they should be on the same body at the same time. His mom and dad don’t really get either of his interests, but are trying very hard to be supportive. Jack is the easiest going out of these characters (except maybe Ramiel) and gets along with just about anybody. He’s Thorn’s “wing man”(for both platonic and romantic interests because Thorn just doesn’t frickin talk to people) and the two are kind of a funny pair to look at since Thorn is so so tall, and Jack is….. not. He also gets along well with Anemone. Jack is very intuitive, and doesn’t feel comfortable around Eirlys, usually actively trying to avoid any contact with her. 

Stella and Brandon have Selene. Selene attends Alfea and is the Fairy of the Sun and Moon. Selene is kind of a screw up. She’s clumsy, forgetful, chronically late, messy, and awkward af. Selene doesn’t really think she suits the role of “princess of Solaria”, one of the most televised planets of the Magix Dimension(kind of like Los Angeles is the celebrity center of the US), but is constantly trying to be better at her role. Unfortunately she’s trying to force herself to be like her mom instead of trying it her own way. The one thing Selene is really good at is sculpting, and can usually be found hidden away in her studio with clay in her hands. and in her hair. and on her clothing. basically everywhere she is not neat. She’s pretty quiet in general but get her started on a project and she’ll rattle ideas off one after the other. She and Ruth are crafting besties, and trade creations frequently. She’s horribly intimidated by Thorn, though its mostly their mutual awkwardness clashing. She doesn’t like to be around Aidan much at all. 

This is Anemone! The unlikely product of Aisha and Nex! Anemone is the Fairy of Coral, and is attending Alfea. Anemone is the girly-est girly girl to ever girl. She likes the pink she likes the ruffles she likes the make up and the fashion and the pastels. But the thing Anemone REALLY likes about being a girly girl is that it means stupid people underestimate her, giving her the upper hand and allowing her to reign terror down upon her enemies. Anemone is a girly girl and also a stone cold bitch. She’s not the nicest girl, but that’s mostly because she has the highest self esteem of any of these characters and does not bother with things that are not worth her time. She’ll be respectful and polite as long as you are. She does confide in Ophelia and considers her a good friend, but also thinks Ophelia needs to get her shit together and stop moping lol. She also gets along well with Jack, as they both enjoy fashion and whatever trend is happening at the moment. She dislikes Eirlys, but doesn’t have a solid reason for why lol. 

Ramiel! Ramiel is Stormy’s son, his father isn’t in the picture. So basically after the news broke that some of the winx were pregnant (because lets face it they would be celebrity news) Icy processed it as “shit. they have reinforcements. we need reinforcements.” and proceeded to have herself, darcy, and stormy try to have kids. Icy had already broken Tritannus out of prison, and it was now just a matter of getting their human merfolk mix to actually work. Darcy has always been a romantic at heart so she promised to have a kid with the next man she was actually interested in. Stormy on the other hand has never really given a damn about romance, so she bore the brunt of Icy’s new obsession with continuing the ancestral witches blood line. Stormy didn’t necessarily mind the actual sex part(wasn’t enthusiastic about it either tho so :/ ), but HATED being pregnant. After a rough pregnancy, Stormy gave birth to a son who Stormy immediately became attached to, which was NOT was Icy was looking for, the ancestral and the trix power is passed down through the female line, meaning a son was functionally worthless to her. After Icy basically told her she would have to try again, Stormy took her son and noped out of there asap. She went to Ms. Griffin for help as a last effort, and after agreeing to be stripped of her magic she and Ramiel were relocated to a hidden, sparsely populated village deep in one of Lynphea’s forests. Ramiel knows nothing of his mother’s past, and, against her express wishes, decided to enroll in the Paladin program at Lynphea College. He thinks of Cymmeri as an annoying younger sister, and doesn’t know Eirlys or Arcturus. He vaguely knows of Thorn and Jack due to Red Fountain and the Order doing group training together occasionally. 

This is Darcy’s daughter Cymmeri, usually just called Cymi. She’s kind of a know-it-all, sassy child, who has only just started to display signs of her magic. She and Ramiel form coincidental friends after a random encounter, and she’ll occasionally go to him when she has a problem she can’t talk to her mom or other cousins about. She, like my version of Darcy, is at least part Koyuvian(my own personal made up planet not from the winx) which gives her the solid eye color. She wears enchanted glasses to make her eyes appear more ordinary, and to filter light that would otherwise hurt her eyes. Cymmeri also really likes to lean into the creepy goth child role just for kicks.

Eirlys and Arcturus are Icy and Tritannus’ twins. Eirlys attends Alfea and is the Fairy/Witch of Snow, Arcticus will eventually attend Red Fountain, though right now he’s learning magic from Tritannus, and acting as a support to his sister. The twins are actually too young to be attending either school, but their height and forged documents take care of that. both of them usually have spells in place to hide their more fishy traits but i wanted to draw them lol. Eirlys is a fitness nut and spends most of her free time exercising or playing sports. This also gives her an excuse to go on long solo runs so she can relay info to Arcturus who then takes it to their mom. Eirlys is kind of arrogant and can do no wrong in Icy’s eyes, where as Arcturus lacks self esteem and is constantly trying to prove his worth to their mom. Arcturus has an affinity for water, and most of his spells use it. Eirlys tries to force her relationship with most of the winx’s kids, but does genuinely get along with Ophelia.   

this isnt totally accurate for their heights but i did some of these really fast and the proportions are off lol. 

[themyskira]

So....have you read the latest Avengers #20, about the current version of She Hulk? How do you feel about that?

I’ve made a point of avoiding Jason Aaron’s Avengers because I truly can’t stand what he’s done to Jen. He took a character who, for all her more recent traumas, for all she can struggle to balance her legal career with her the pitfalls of being a publicly known superhero, loves who she is and embraces being green wholeheartedly -- he took Shulkie and turned her into Lady Bruce Banner, retiring lawyer whose inner ragemonster is just waiting to break loose. It’s some deep-seated bullshit and I’ve been trying my best to simply wait for it all to pass over.

But it was hard to ignore Avengers #20, because this was the issue where Jason Aaron went right off the fucking rails. I mean, he really went full Aaron Sorkin on his readers, and that isn’t a compliment.

Classic She-Hulk: Charming. Witty. Sensational. The Jolly Jade Giantess. The sassiest super-lawyer in all of Brooklyn. More laughs than a barrel of Deadpools. Fun. For years, that’s how the world described my client.  Until the accused came here and flushed all that global adoration down the gamma-irradiated toilet.Jason Aaron She-Hulk: Rrrgh. Objection. Some still like--Judge Jen: Overruled!Classic She-Hulk: The accused would like you to believe she’s not at fault for what happened to my client. That these changes in her personality are the unfortunate side-effect of her new powers, which were awakened inside her by some meddling space giants... and that since that happened she's been doing her best to regain control of herself. To do right by my client and give the world back the gorgeous, green, fun-loving bombshell they know and love. But that’s a complete lie, isn’t it? ... Ladies of the jury, I ask you... is this the face we want to present to the world? After everything we’ve worked to accomplish over the years, is this the sort of muscle-bound downer of a Hulk we want to be?

This sequence takes place in the context of a mental simulation being used by Jen in an effort to build her control over her powers, but in truth it’s just three long and excruciating pages of Aaron taking petty swipes at fans who are unhappy with his portrayal of She-Hulk. Through this exchange, he deliberately frames criticisms of his She-Hulk as shallow, over-the-top and sexist, suggesting that those of us who dislike his barely-recognisable ‘roidmonster Jen simply don’t understand good writing and that we just want a fun sexy green bombshell to wank over.

(Also implicit in this, and indeed throughout the comic, is the view that classic She-Hulk is less meaningful as a character because her comics are frequently humour-oriented. ‘Funny’ is situated in contrast to ‘deep’, ignoring the fact that Jen’s best writers have found room for both, and that Aaron’s She-Hulk fails to be either.)

And that sets the tone for the whole issue. From that point on, the entire comic is just Aaron transparently editorialising that no, you guys just don’t get it, my She-Hulk is better and deeper and more feminist than your She-Hulk.

“I was an omega-level threat in the charm department. I was the Hulk you’d want to have a glass of pinot with. And the craziest part was, my powers, for the most part... made me happy. An incredibly rare occurrence in my line of work. I actually enjoyed being a hero. I loved being the fun Hulk. I loved it a whole helluva lot. So how come I don’t miss it?

“There’s a war on. And the trolls have taken Australia. I’m part of the team that’s taking it back. These trolls come from a faraway realm, but I know their kind. They would’ve laughed at the old me. Made crass jokes even as I was taking them down. This time, nobody’s laughing. And I love it with my all big, green, glowing heart.”

The frustrating thing is, he’s right on the cusp of something genuinely interesting here.

Men who speak angrily and aggressively are apt to be seen as tough, forceful and strong-willed; women who do the same are more often viewed as shrill, nagging, hysterical, bitchy. Many women consciously or unconsciously learn to mask their anger, make ourselves smaller and less threatening. Asserting yourself can be the difference between being seen as the ‘fun girl’ and the humourless bitch.

And the sexual harassment he references -- the sexist jokes, the propositioning, the devaluing of women’s capabilities -- not only are these things that many women, from the most disadvantaged to the most powerful, face to different degrees, they’re relevant on a meta level to the portrayal of women in comics.

All of these themes would be ripe for exploration in the context of classic She-Hulk. Jen is a fun-loving character whose life isn’t governed by rage and the need to control it the way other Hulks are, but that doesn’t mean she can always afford to lose her temper -- as both a woman working in a profession rife with sexism and ‘old boys club’ attitudes, and as a female superhero in the public eye, “you wouldn’t like me when I’m angry” takes on a whole different meaning.

Conversely, we might also think about Jen’s privilege in this regard -- that by virtue of her public profile and influence and general ability to grind men into a pulp without breaking a sweat, she doesn’t face the same level of discrimination as other women. That other women (particularly women of colour and LGBTQI women) don’t have the same freedom to express their anger as she does, not without consequences. And that -- as both the superhero She-Hulk and as the high-profile lawyer Jennifer Walters -- she is in a position to help other women to be heard and ensure that their anger is answered with change.

As for historical sexism in comics, there’s no better antidote to the male gaze than hiring more women and nonbinary people.

None of that seems to interest Jason Aaron. Rather, in defence of his roided-out Girl Bruce, he seems to be saying... what? ‘I have fixed sexism by making Jen so buff that men are too scared to undervalue or sexually harass her’?

(Which, by the way, they still do anyway.)

Next, we get this exchange:

Deadpool: Why’d you stop being funny? I mean, you were really good at it. You were like... me before me.She-Hulk: Rrgh. Rather be free.Deadpool: How’s that?She-Hulk: Free to be ugly.Deadpool: Um, wait, can’t you be both?

So, the implication is that before now, Jen wasn’t “free” to be her whole self -- that she had to be the fun, funny girl to avoid being seen as too angry and threatening.

And aside from the fact that, as I said, I think there are many more nuanced ways to explore this without negating Jen’s characterisation -- this is just lazy goddamn writing. It’s not an idea Aaron has explored up till now, nor is it reflective of the ways in which Jen has been portrayed in the past. It’s just a messy retcon jammed into the story to justify the ‘superiority’ of Aaron’s version of the character. Once again, the writer is speaking through the characters.

We also see Aaron once again implying that being “ugly” -- by which he means physically imposing, buff, not resembling a typical comic book pinup girl -- ‘frees’ Jen from the constraints of sexism, which is full-blown outrageous.

You think that men only sexually harass women they deem attractive? Really? You think that sexism stops at catcalls and underestimation? You think that Jen, a female superhero in the public eye, isn’t going to be subjected to ugly sexist slurs no matter what she looks like? That is as insulting as it is naive.

Later, Aarons-via-Jen engages in some meta-criticism of the fact that She-Hulk has traditionally been portrayed not as a huge, buff ragemonster but as a sexy bodybuilder (and retconning in a shit-ton of sexual harassment while he’s at it, because remember, sexism only affects women society deems conventionally attractive).

“Cousin Bruce said something once, a few years back... about how envious he was of me. How easy he figured I had it. When he hulked out, he became a giant, deformed monster who couldn’t even wear normal clothes. While there I was looking like a bodybuilder who’d just been spray-painted green. I could wear suits, walk down the street without people running and screaming. Teenage boys hung posters of me on their walls. Must be nice, Bruce said to me, to be that kind Hulk.

“I’d never wanted to punch my cousin so bad. And that’s saying something. I told him about the parts of being me that he was oblivious to. About all the times I’d been hit on during team-ups. The bad guys who’d cop a feel when we were fighting.  The sleaze ball who published photos of me topless when I was in the Fantastic freaking Four. (I’d really rather you didn’t Google that.) No paparazzi ever followed Bruce around taking photos of his butt while he was fighting the Leader. I told him... looking like a big scary monster didn’t seem so bad to be sometimes.”

And here we really get to the thesis underlying Aaron’s argument, the reason he feels She-Hulk needed a complete overhaul.

Like most superheroines, She-Hulk was shaped by the male gaze. It’s fair to say that played a lot into her original character design as a green Amazonian bombshell, whose appearance and comparative level-headedness stood in stark contrast to the huge, monstrous, rage-driven Hulk whose powers she inherited. Heroines in cape comics are supposed to be ‘fun’ and ‘sexy’ (as judged by the men they were typically being written by and for). Jen’s body has frequently been the subject of titillation and her promiscuity has frequently been the subject of crude humour.

Aaron seems to view this as the flaw at the heart of the character, and it’s something he’s set out to correct -- by making her the gigantic, buff, scary, angry Hulk she was never allowed to be at the outset. Sexism thwarted! Strong Female Character accomplished! Give yourself a pat on the back, Jason.

Except, here’s the thing.

It’s true that Jen has often been depicted through the lens of a male sex fantasy. 

It’s also true that many readers have embraced her as a female power fantasy.

As the super-buff, super-strong, seven-foot-tall She-Hulk, Jen doesn’t feel the need to bite her tongue or moderate her opinions or diminish herself out of concern for how others might respond. She doesn’t have to hide her confidence or her sexuality. Through her transformation, Jen gains the freedom to embrace all that she’s been repressing -- the brilliant, witty, brash, assertive, body-confident parts of herself she’s always kept hidden from the world.

In looking at Jen selectively through the lens of sexualised artwork, instances of bad writing and a frankly snobbish undervaluing of humour comics, Aaron zooms right past everything that makes her such an appealing and empowering character to so many readers.

Which brings me right back to Deadpool’s comment earlier in the issue: Can’t you be both?

If your complaint is that Jen is portrayed in a male-gazey, overly sexualised manner that de-emphasises her strength and physical power, hire an artist who will draw her as the buff, badass giantess that she is.

She-Hulk doesn’t need a gamma power-up or a brutish alter ego to be formidable, she’s She-Hulk ffs. And stripping Jen of all her femininity in the process of turning her into a ‘roided-out tank raises some dodgy gendered assumptions in itself.

(For me, Peak Jen is a giant buff green woman in a bright pink designer suit. Not only can she be both, she already was.)

And hey, just gonna throw this one out there again, if your complaint is that since her creation Jen has been predominantly written and drawn from male perspectives for a male audience, resulting in some sexist and oversexualised portrayals, how about you hire some goddamn women and nonbinary people to write and draw her?

This is not the Great Feminist Reimagining of She-Hulk that you think it is, Jason Aaron. This is a slightly more pretentious rehash of that time David Goyer dismissed the character as a “giant green porn star”. You’re trying to ‘fix’ Jen by negating everything that she was previously, which is quite simply bad writing.

And when you find yourself dedicating a full issue of a comic book to calling your readers stupid for not liking your treatment of a character, that feels like a pretty sure sign that you’ve fucked up.

[blackcatanna]

First impressions of Hakuoki characters:

Hijikata: Sebastian from Black Butler realness. Is mean but in a reluctant way. Like a Mum who is in charge of discipline because her husband (Kondou) is incapable of laying down the law. I like him but I would like him more if the game wasn't sucking his dick so hard. He has good hair. Please don't kill me, Hijikata!

Okita: He is handsome (duh) but seems a bit too eager to kill his own men... Ugh, now he's making me thank him. His idea of humour is threatening to kill you. He's like an old cackling witch who was shunned by the world and is taking it out on anyone he has power over. I enjoy him but I find it hard to relate to someone who takes pleasure in tormenting the helpless. Big dom energy. Probably enjoyed tying you up a bit too much. I want to fight back but I have a feeling that there is no script for bratty Chizuru. :'(

Saito: The Chosen One. He is dangerous but also adorable. He saved mah life *swoons*. He is HELPFUL. He has beautiful impractical hair. He is CONCISE. He is POLITE. He just seems like a great person to have around... If he's on your side (R.I.P. Itou). Alas, we can never be wed, for he is already married to his sword... Or maybe it's Hijikata... Or Okita... Or tofu. He has a lot of commitments.

Harada: He has red hair. Me like red hair. I feel like all three of them are way too casual about my impending doom. Not getting friendly vibes here. However, it turns out that he's pretty great! A bit too chirpy for my liking, though. Because I'm a miserable bitch (goth), I guess. The baka trio are all more boisterous and outgoing than I would be comfortable being around but I like them on their own. Harada is my favourite, though. Definitely the Mum of the trio. I guess that makes him the cool aunty of the Shinsengumi? He has the best Kazama burns and I will always love him for that.

Heisuke: I wish that the others would stop treating him like a child. Maybe they would if he stopped taking their bait. He's the most openly friendly of the group and that means a lot when you're surrounded by new people (and are being held against your will). He looks like an angry wildcat. I like cats so that's fine, I guess.

Kazama: Ew. Can you tell that I don't like him? Fuck this wannabe nonce. Actually, no! Don't fuck him! That's what he wants! Just stab him real good. He cannot control his temper. I do not respect that. He is racist. He is too scared of rejection to court a girl and get consent. He is really handsome but he has the worst personality so I feel no attraction to him at all. Not even for a hate fuck. No. Go away.

Nagakura: Ah, the classic pervert! We love a slut! I kept forgetting who he was, though. Sorry. Clearly, he has hidden depths but I have yet to find out what those are. Is a little bit too violent. Needs to calm tf down. I don't really have much else to say about first impressions. At first, the baka trio were just loud, wacky background noise.

Sannan: Seems fine, I guess... Fairly reasonable. If he was such a sweet, fluffy bunny before his injury, why was everyone so scared of him? He has a pleasantly calm aura. However, he needs to work on his diplomacy. Demanding blood while brandishing a sword is extremely un-chill of him. I also enjoy wandering around eerily in the middle of the night so we have that in common. Definitely gives off sinister vibes.

Yamazaki: Ninja Nurse Mum! He is clever, selfless, dedicated and reliable! He deserves a better hairstyle XD Sorry Yamazaki! The rat tail is not a strong look but he probably has more important things to worry about like SAVING LIVES and coming up with new moves to shout out in combat. I am excited to do his route because he deserves all the happiness.

Iba: The most beautiful one. He's rich, good looking, friendly and has had a crush on you for years. He also rescues you from the Shinsengumi on numerous occasions to hang out and eat delicious desserts. He's very cute. Definitely too good to be true. Everyone has a dark side and it concerns me when someone locks theirs away so much. Or maybe he really is that 2D. Iba is so perfect that they had to give him the Demon Arm of Horniness because they didn't want to tarnish him with a human flaw. I would probably be obsessed with him if he was real but, as a character, I don't find him that interesting.

Sakamoto: I still have no idea who this man is. He creeps me out, though. I don't remember why, I just remember being creeped out when you first meet him. Maybe he should mind his own business.

Souma: Puppy? Who threw this poor guy to Harada and Nagakura? Wow, I finally have underlings. However, they are probably not here against their will. He looks scared so he must have some brains. I haven't played his route yet so I don't know much about him.

Nomura: Horny Puppy! This isn't really a first impression (except for in the sense that all of my impressions are initial because I haven't played much with him in yet) and is totally spoilery but there's a bit in Edo Blossoms where they're making fun of him for being terrible with women and how it'll take him ten years to figure them out. At the time, I thought, "Bit harsh, guys. He could very easily die tomorrow and then he'll never get any." AND THEN HE DID. Die, that is. Not get laid. R.I.P.

Kondou: Married to Hijikata. They have loads of terrible children. Fun Dad. Thinks that he's a cool Dad but there are no cool Dads. Everyone talks about how nice he is and how everyone loves him but it's hard to appreciate that when he's debating whether or not to feed you to Okita. Turns out, he is kind but very busy. Definitely a secret badass. Very secret. He gives off friendly bear vibes.

Inoue: Friendly Grandad who is way younger than he looks. Not datable so he is mostly in the background, just being kind, helpful and dependable. He is warm but calm and comforting to be around.

Shimada: Gruff undatable anime guy who is not a bishie and so his brave and heroic acts often go unnoticed.

Motoyama: Bless him for trying to be a wingman. Why is he so scared of the Shinsengumi? Scary poor people with swords? He is very good at his job. Needs to calm down with the winks and nudges.

Itou: This Bitch. He could be fabulous but he loses points for mocking the disabled. He's Regina George. Except he actually dies. Is very camp. Would be great to go shopping with him. Not necessarily gay but is the gay best friend you deserve, not the gay best friend you asked for. Is a bitch but also sometimes the only sane person in the room. He's not reading you, he's just being real with you because you're Shinsengumi Sisters.

Miki: Bitch by Association. "Darling." Doesn't seem totally evil, just trying to do his best by his brother. Relies on tough guy image. Doing his job but happens to be on team Bitch. Also, he is a handsome boi.

Takeda: Fabulous Cunt. Should be too beautiful to be such a disaster human and yet here we are. Starts off as a bit of a prick, ends up (spoilers) feasting on the flesh of innocents... Is that a glow up? He's a dirty cop. Nobody likes him X_X :'(

Shiranui: GUNS! SHOOTY SHOOTY! He has a lot of aggression and he channels it through his GUNS. He always looks somewhat maniacal. Needs to take a chill pill.

Amagiri: Infuriatingly calm enemy with infuriating facial hair. He seems pretty chill and not bloodthirsty so... Good? He punched Heisuke, though, so RAAAAAAAWR!!!!

Kodo: Worst Dad. Scalpels > kunai. Took a level in WTF while he was away (hopefully he wasn't always like that).

Kaoru: Why can't I dress like that? :'( Definitely evil.

Sen: Hey, don't tell me off for protecting you! Can we be best friends?! I'M SO STARVED OF FEMALE CONTACT!!! More of this queen, please. She is powerful, kind and she is honest! I wanted to run away with her while Saito and Heisuke were away :') But the game didn't let me :'(

Kimigiku: GOALS. Why can't I be disguised as a geisha (except for that one time) :'( GET THIS QUEEN A ROUTE. She is beauty she is grace. I wish that I looked more like a woman and less like a child. I want her to be my friend too. She can teach me her womanly arts!

Chizuru!: She's fine. Much less annoying than she could easily be. Too pure for this world. A fine example of woman (well, she looks like a child). Her disguise is useless. Pretends not to be thirsty but rushes past Itou to see shirtless men. HMMMMMMM.

[douxreviews]

The Handmaid's Tale - ‘Unfit’ Review

"I've never seen anyone so devoted."

Like the Canadian story line, the flashbacks in this show are often a welcome relief from the horrors of present day Gilead. This time, not so much.

Let me start by saying that Ann Dowd is absolutely awesome as the fearsome Aunt Lydia, and a flashback to her past should have done more to explain her character. Instead, even in her past, Lydia was taking children from their mothers while pontificating about her good intentions. She is just as conflicted and confusing as she always was. Maybe there's just no explaining people like Lydia. Or anyone who fits in Gilead.

Lydia Clements was a fourth grade teacher who used to work in family law. She went from judging Noelle, a poor young mother with a bad job, to helping her financially and giving her emotional support (which was lovely), to initiating legal proceedings that successfully took Noelle's son Ryan away from her. A remarkably bad thing that followed a remarkably good thing, and note how Lydia's clothing and hair style changed from loose, comfortable and attractive to a Gilead-like shapeless outfit and restrained bun.

This was tied in to Lydia's possible new boyfriend, Principal Jim. Lydia and Jim seemed so well matched: both were single again with careers in education, and clearly religious since they both quoted the Bible in casual conversation. Jim even said grace in the karaoke bar before they ate. (Karaoke "Islands in the Stream." Too cute, and adorably out of character for Lydia.)

Why would their aborted lovemaking on the couch push Lydia over the edge into such overwhelming shame, into violently destroying her own image in a mirror? Was it because she finally allowed herself to acknowledge her own sexual needs, and being rejected was too heavy a blow? For that matter, why did Jim stop? His wife died three years ago. Was it really too soon for him, or did her aggressive move on the couch turn him off? And why did this incident make Lydia turn on Noelle? Because Noelle had encouraged her to date again, had given her makeup?

Tying this into our lead character, we've all been wondering how June is still alive considering how badly she's been acting. I think June is too angry right now to be frightened of what could happen to her. Maybe Aunt Lydia sees June the way she saw Noelle, as someone she would try over and over again to push in the right direction – until she didn't. This doesn't bode well for June.

I enjoyed the three gossipy aunts around a table matching Handmaids to Commanders more than the flashbacks. This was background that we needed. Aunt Lydia complained about June's misbehavior, but then she talked about June being misled. "We never had issues with Ofjoseph before the Waterfords. A problem household, to say the least. And she was there for all that business with Emily." Aunt Elizabeth added, "And Lillie." It's an explanation for why June is still alive and undamaged. Not a great one, but an explanation.

During the almost comical testifying scene in the gym, June did acknowledge that Frances' death was June's fault, and that Hannah would suffer for what June did. And then June took that opportunity to turn on Ofmatthew, saying truthfully that Ofmatthew didn't want her baby. We learned that Ofmatthew thought her baby was going to be a girl this time, and she didn't want to bring a daughter into Gilead. I so can't blame her.

During their shopping trip to Loaves and Fishes, June smiled as Ofmatthew snatched the guardian's gun and went on her desperation spree, and then she nodded when Ofmatthew was aiming the gun at her. I think June was ready to die. When Ofmatthew changed her target to Aunt Lydia, I was yelling, "Kill her!" Sadly, no. The death of Ofmatthew and her possibly female fetus, along with the death of Ofandy's baby girl, felt like a metaphor for the murderous sickness of Gilead's culture.

Racism in Gilead

This is the second episode in a row that featured the horrible death of a black woman. It's also the first time race was so much as mentioned. During that fascinating scene with the Aunts and the sherry and the files on the lazy susan, Aunt Lydia said that one of the Commanders didn't want a Handmaid of color. Racial prejudice exists in Gilead, but it is kept on the down low. Under the table, pun intended.

Critics of this show talk a lot about intersectionality, how jarring it is that Gilead is all about the misogyny while racial issues don't seem to exist, and really, I totally get that. It's a major change from Atwood's book. In reality, a fascist, misogynistic society like Gilead would almost certainly be deeply racist as well. I initially thought I understood why the producers made this decision. They wanted the focus of this fictional dystopia to be the oppression of women, period. There is also the practical consideration that if they had adhered more faithfully to the source material, the entire cast of this series would be white.

While I was thinking about what I would write about this episode, I realized that I hadn't thought through that assumption. They could have kept Gilead logically racist by having Handmaids of color while all of the Commanders and Wives were white. White slave owners in the past often raped and impregnated their black slaves, didn't they? And of course, June could have still had a black husband and daughter. I wonder why they didn't go that way? It would have made a lot more sense.

More glowing comments about the photography

As usual, the photography in this episode was spectacular. I was particularly struck by the from-above shot of Handmaids circling Ofandy with comfort and hugs, June in the snow with a red umbrella on her way to Loaves and Fishes, and the camera attached and moving with Ofmatthew's gun. The most striking was the line of red blood on white tile as Ofmatthew's body was dragged out of the store; it reminded me of the red ropes they use for hanging.

And the flashbacks were so pretty that they often looked unreal – the diffused lights on the Christmas tree, the sparkling clothing and hangings at the nightclub, the New Year's Eve glitter. I'm sure that was on purpose. The unreality, I mean.

Do they celebrate Christmas in Gilead? Has it been mentioned? It seems unlikely. But I didn't think they would have dancing, either.

Bits:

— The name of Hannah's Martha wasn't mentioned in the previous episode, but here, the very first scene started with June talking about Frances, and what an ordinary life she led before Gilead. Much like Lydia.

— Janine was kindness itself toward Ofmatthew, and when Ofmatthew lost it in Loaves and Fishes, she beat the crap out of Janine. It would have made more sense if Ofmatthew had attacked June, instead.

— During the birth scenes and the testifying, the Handmaids were acting a little like a bitchy high school clique. "Crybaby! Crybaby! Crybaby! Crybaby!" actually made me laugh.

— June told Joseph Lawrence that he wasn't protecting Eleanor, he was suffocating her. Lawrence didn't take the bait. I'm starting to think the Lawrences are in danger. Gilead turns on its own on a regular basis. No one is safe.

— The Lydia/Ryan twenty questions scene that opened the flashback began with Ryan asking, "Am I alive?" I wonder. Is he?

— Gold acting stars for Ashleigh LaThrop, who played Ofmatthew. I wish we'd known her character's real name. Maybe we'll find out what it was at the beginning of the next episode.

Quotes:

Aunt Lydia: "Tell your friends to cool it." June: "I'm sorry, Aunt Lydia. I don't know what you're talking about. You want to take my tongue out? Burn my arm? Better hope they don't need me on TV again for Nichole."

June: "How did that rhyme go? The one we'd jump rope to? Tinker, tailor, soldier, sailor, rich man, poor man, beggar man, thief. A game to tell what our children would grow up to be. The list is a lot shorter now, especially if it's a girl. Martha, Jezebel, Handmaid, Wife." What about "Aunt"?

Noelle: "You're a fucking coldhearted bitch!" Lydia: "I forgive you."

Aunt Lydia: "Sometimes it's the apple, and sometimes it's the barrel." Aunt Lydia has decided it's the barrel this time. She wants to transfer June to another household. Uh oh.

June: "I hurt her. and I enjoyed it. The wives and aunts, too, grieving over Ofandy's dead child. And Lawrence. They all deserve to suffer. It's an acquired taste, seeing others in pain. Like that smoky scotch Luke got as a gift once. I grew to like that."

June: "I finally know how Oflgen felt, what made her put on that bomb vest. […] And I know how Emily felt, right before she stuck a knife in Lydia's back." Again, it sure sounds like June is ready to die.

This is the second episode in a row that I didn't much like. Two out of four smoky scotches.

---

Billie Doux loves good television and spends way too much time writing about it.

[go-diane-winchester]

How Misha ruined slash fiction

THIS IS AN EDITED REPOST.

I first got into fandom slash fiction because of Lord of the Rings.  Before that I had no idea there were others like me.  The Ringers, as I prefer to call them, were the nicest slash fans and gave me the erroneous impression that slashers are really lovely girls.  How wrong I was.  But almost twenty years ago, I [and my generational demographic] had the semblance of mind to differentiate between fact and fantasy.  I came across the definition of slash fiction, way back then.  Its was generically defined as fanwork done by women for women.  Of course one would argue that men like slash fiction too.  Correction.  Straight and Bi women like slash fiction.  Gay or bisexual men like Bara.  That is something that they indulge in because it is attractive to them.  How trans people fit into this dynamic, would be an interesting study for the future and I have already done a post on that subject. 

Straight women are completely different.  How straight women show their attraction and what they are attracted to, is completely different to what gay or bi men like.  Even bisexual women are still women and still writing from a female perspective.  For decades, and I am counting the pre-star trek era, that was how things were.  Women, for decades, had no other platform for sexual expression except slash fiction.  The phenomenon started in the East, and spread all over the world.  But Eastern and Western slash are completely different from one another.  Why don't women just write something with a man and a woman?  This is where we notice that slashers and other women are completely different.  Slashers don't like to watch another woman’s love story.  Its not satisfying for us.  We can write ourselves as the other half of a pairing, like a Mary Sue scenario, but to be honest, its not the most popular genre because the only woman truly satisfied with the story is the writer herself.  Women, very seldom, bond over Mary Sues.  But slash stories are discussed as a way of bonding over a common interest.    

Classic slash was hidden.  It was underground, which was good because the uncultured riff raff stayed away.  It was the ultimate girl talk.  It surprised us, how similar our desires were and what we found attractive.  Remember the faulty character Becky Rosen?  Even though she is problematic, the moment Sam licked his thumb and wiped the ink stain off her nose, many of us turned into embarrassing swoony puddles.  Why?  He was cleaning her nose, for goodness sake.  What’s so cute about that?  I don’t know.  We all just gushed at him.  Remember Dean spinning the Impala in the episode “Baby”.  I played that bit again and again.  It had nothing to with sex.  Dean was handling a car but I remember having a flushed face over it.   

I read somewhere that foreplay starts in the kitchen.  This applies to women anyway.  So warming your girl up starts way before you even get her to the bedroom.  So you start with a candle lit dinner and soft music and slow dancing.  While he may be ready when he walks in through the door, she will need wining, dining, dancing and lovey dovey talk to get interested.  Usually.  Sometimes, she will appear suddenly turned on, but no, she just saw her husband helping an old man cross the street, and she thought ’‘why is he so stinking cute?  Wait till I get my hands on him’’.  But that is once in a while.  We don’t switch on and off like men.  We are, by nature, cautious creatures.  Getting us in the mood is as important as the act of lovemaking itself.  That is why art that is geared to women, generally, is over-the-top and melodramatic, indulging the foreplay more than the sex. 

Ryan Gosling with a boom box [or whatever you call that thing] standing on top a car, confessing his undying love = foreplay.  Jack Dawson making Rose stand at the head of the ship [or whatever you call it], making her imagine she’s flying = foreplay. Is it necessary to the story?  Nope.  Will the Titanic stay buoyant because Jack didn’t make Rose fly?  Nah, its will still sink.  Do we like it, nonetheless?  Oooh, yeah.  

For the past 80 or so years, we have kept slash fiction solely to ourselves because:

men wont appreciate it because its not their “thing”

men will misunderstand it [case in point: Misha Collins]

because it was sexual fantasy and some of us would prefer not to share that openly. 

Did male actors speak about it when they did find out?  Yes, in passing, especially if they were the subject of the story.  A reporter or crew member would always tell them.  In the case of J2, Kim Manners apparently told them what he had found on the internet.  The Lord of the Rings cast found out because of Peter Jackson.  What was their reaction?  The same as all the other actor’s reactions: They would smirk/laugh about it, make a joke and move on.  Then Misha Collins came along.  The first time he had spoken about slash fiction, I had winced.  Apparently, judging from the audience reaction, so had they.  We really didn’t want this spoken about, openly, for two reason. 

1]  He was speaking to a general audience during his panel.  Some of them don’t care for slash fiction and no, homophobia has nothing to do with it.  If it doesn’t float your boat, it just doesn’t.  Keep throwing the word homophobia around, unnecessarily, and its going to eventually lose its effectiveness because it is frequently being used to bully people into doing what you want, rather than for equality.  So no, Jensen Ackles is not a homophobe because he doesn’t want to be up close and personal with Misha Collins.  Grow up. 

2]  The sane slashers of those days, [and it was a decade ago] didn’t want their personal naughty little secrets spoken about so candidly in a public setting.  Why?  Let me illustrate.  If you tell your friends, in a personal setting, how you like when a man runs his hands all over your body, it will illicit some “oohs” and giggles followed by their own contributions to the discussion.  If you are sitting with that same gaggle of friends at a crowded restaurant and you say the same thing loudly for the whole room to hear, what will they think of you, especially if they have children with them. 

Slash used to be one of those things a lady never spoke about in public, no matter how empowered she thought she was.  Personally, I don’t think a lady has to relinquish her femininity and decency in order to feel empowered.  That’s why I don’t like women, like Kim and Briana, who call themselves bitches to show how tough they are.  Sure, I will break a man's face, if he puts his hands on me, but that doesn’t mean that I have no feminine qualities, and I won't exhibit this aggressive side of myself with a loving and caring man.  I guess things have changed since the early days, and women are different now.  But this is just my opinion and not relevant to the subject at hand.

If Misha knew how to gauge the audience, he would have understood there and then, that this is not a suitable topic to indulge in, where the audience was mixed and included some younger people, i.e., teens and children.  What he did, was to keep running his mouth off about something he didn’t know.  And its shows in the way he refers to Destiel as pseudo-porn.  His fans were very angry about it, because it lessened their artistic efforts to pornography and nothing else.  He said he went on Wikipedia to learn more about slash fiction.  For a man who went to university, he is not very smart.  If you have ever done any academic research report at university level, you will know that any report that includes citations from Wikipedia are immediately rejected. 

Wikipedia is an unreliable source of convoluted, opinionated information that is sometimes not quantifiable and therefore cannot act as an academic resource.  Plus anyone can edit those pages, no matter what agenda they have or how stupid they are.  This fool didn’t know that.  So he started to “educate” the still fixated younger batch [who have now grown into the hellers we loathe with gusto] in the audience and on YouTube as to what slash fiction was and that is why they like him so much.  While other actors speak a line about it and move onto another topic, Professor Knowitall esq. will give his rather young audience a lecture on a subject he knows nothing about, thereby conditioning them to think that slash fiction is something that it isn’t.  Is he that stupid or that arrogant?

If you look through Wikipedia, it will give you the impression that slash is homosexual in nature, and that it is an expression of gay love.  The fact that those stories and artwork originated with straight women and are powered by the artistic efforts of straight women, is ignored.  There are topics about queer recognition and LGBT relevance on that page.  The page isn’t telling you what slash fiction is.  It is telling you what other groups feel about it.  I can tell you, almost a century ago, slash fans were not indulging this art form for those reasons.  They were doing it for their own satisfaction.  If other people like it too, that’s fine and dandy, but it is not about them.  And what Misha has done with this fandom, which is bleeding into other fandoms via intrusive destiel fans, is to make slash about the LGBT. 

That is why gay men are now getting angry because young impressionable girls are listening to him and turning a straight/bi female art form into an inaccurate gay platform.  They are using things like closetedness, gay bashings, bigotry and even AIDS as a gay “trope” or theme for their stories.  Gay men fought to change the name ''Gay Cancer'' to AIDS, because it was erroneously being considered a homosexual disease, and yet years later, we have a ''fake'' inclusive generation celebrating a story like ''Twist and Shout".  No wonder gay men hate teen slash girls.  If you write about a subject you know nothing of, you will write it wrong.  These children [because they behave like that] are writing about some very sensitive and serious topics and they are romanticizing them.  What person wont get angry? 

In the old days, the two people who made up a pairing, were differentiated, by using two words:  Seme and Uke.  While slash was a straight female art form, gay men didn’t give two hoots about these words.  They didn’t read the stuff.  They didn’t care.  They had bara.  When “woke and non-bigoted, inclusive” slash fans started speaking for gay men through their stories despite the fact that these men have a voice of their own, the guys got angry because they don’t have a seme and uke role type in their relationships.  Well, of course they don’t.  Slash is not about gay men.  Its about straight women and their sexual expression.  And in their fantasies, there are seme’s and uke’s. 

That is another problem with the Wikipedia page.  When you look at the history, it starts with Kirk and Spock.  The dunderhead who wrote that page, didn’t know that slash started in the east, probably Japan, although Hong Kong might dispute that.  When it became animated in the 1970’s, the anime version was called Yaoi.  The Japanese were actually making money from slash fiction way back when, by making comic type books, essentially novels with pictures.  And it was those translated stories, which were almost always set in another world, that gave birth to Kirk/Spock slash fiction.  Star Trek is also set in another world so to speak.  The westerners got hold of these books when the Asians immigrated.  The first slash stories were actually distributed in conventions, because the internet didn't exist back then. 

There is only one other person who over-indulged his slash fan base.  Harry Styles.  He regretted it, because it ruined his friendship.  So he stopped.  But he had a good excuse.  He was between the ages of 15 and 19 whilst in 1 Direction.  He was a baby and didn’t know any better.  Harry learned his lesson within five years and stopped.  Misha has been on the show for ten years. He was in his mid thirties when he started on Supernatural.  He was already a grown man who has no excuse, because he is not stupid.  With the amount of damage the militant destiel fans have done, you would think that he would stop.  He doesn’t.  Because it gives him staying power. 

The one thing I have noticed is, overindulging a slash fan [not necessary a heller - any slash fan] is like feeding a Mogwai after midnight.  It turns into an uncontrollable gremlin.  That is exactly what Misha’s militant fanbase is: a hideous collection of gremlins that he overfed and now they are attacking any mogwai that doesn’t show gremlin traits, even if they are mild-mannered destiel fans who don't like the leads beings threatened.  What Misha’s dumb section have now done, is that they have taken slash fiction itself, and turned it into an increasingly hateful and problematic concept.  Because, the general public, which includes J2 [because they have nothing to do with slash fiction], now have the impression that slash is a means of bullying and putting your indulgences before other peoples’ opinions and dignity, in the name of representation. 

It also give the impression, to unknowing people, that homosexuals are boisterous and demanding people and you have to please them or else.  The general public don’t know that predominantly female, heterosexual, entitled princesses are writing this crap.  They think that gays are pushing slash fiction because words like gay, queer and LGBT keep popping up in a pro-destiel argument.  Any gay man reading this, take heed, because these children are damaging your collective reputations.  And if you don’t deal with it now, the PR headache you are going to have to deal with, in the future, as a group, is going to be immense. And it won’t even be your fault, but you will be blamed for it.  How do you go about doing that?  Speak directly to Misha.  Shut up the master Gremlin-Troll himself.  Tell him he is doing you a great disservice.  After all, the mostly straight heller girls are speaking for you and he is pushing the microphones into their hands. 

I always liked slash because not only was it a means of female sexual expression, but it was also a means of female creativity.  Sure, we all like Cinderella, but it was lukewarm for some of us because, she was difficult to emulate.  And growing up, we didn’t know she was a character to enjoy, not to emulate.  Children always emulate what they see on screen.  She was thin, pretty, a good singer with nice hair and small feet.  I am club footed, bipolar and fat, with a lion’s mane that brushes broke on.  I felt sorry for her because she was abused.  I felt sorry for her because she was crying at one point.  Then I remembered what I look like when I cry.  Soft tears don't roll gently down my pink cheeks.  Snot rolls down my nose, careening to the inside of my mouth.  Not pretty.  Not delicate.  The story was nice but it left me feeling inadequate.  Some women love it.  Others, like myself, are “meh” about it. 

When I read a bemusing slash version with actors in place of the fictional cast, I read the whole story smirking.  I didn’t begrudge the beautiful lead [I think it might have been Jensen] because I was as besotted with him as Prince Charming was [presumably Jared].  I didn’t want to be him.  I wanted him.  I wanted the prince too, just FYI.  I could be a fly on the wall in the story, without actually picturing how my insignificant self would fit into the story.  That is what slash fiction meant to me.  It was an escapist art form into a fantasy 'verse, that is custom made to put a smile on my face. 

Now, Prince Charming is fighting for gay rights against his bigoted father, the king, and Cinderella is beaten by his ugly step siblings because he is a homo.  And I look at it and blink.  I am not the audience for this story.  Empathy is one thing, but replacing your sexuality with someone else’s, is something else all together.  Especially since every slash story now, seems to be about gay characters and gay rights and homophobia.  Slash has turned into a one trick pony.  How much could you write about gay rights?  Slash’s creativity is running on autopilot.  Take your ship, make them gay, make one closeted and unhappy, make the other out and happy, throw in a gay oriented trope, even AIDS [no decency threshold] and boom!  You've got a story.  

They’ve been writing in this way for the last ten years and they’ve ruined the whole genre.  So much so, that destiel and cockles stories aren’t enjoyed by anyone except destiel fans, because Misha and Cas are in those stories.  And he is always written as a precious smol bean.  At this juncture, I have to point out that, to be fair, other ships on Supernatural and other fandoms are doing the same thing, because destiel fans bend the will of others to their own.  I heard they are actually tagging destiel into posts about other shows.  Other bloggers noticed that destiel and Misha are in Mother Nature tag.  They don't even leave Mother Nature alone.  Why?  Because Misha has turned a harmless indulgence into an addiction.  He is their only dealer and pursuing canon gives them their fix.  They are gremlins on crack with stunted creativity. 

Of course, the children argue that they can't read an unrealistic story which is why slash characters have to instead be gay.  Oh yeah, then how come in Cockles stories, Misha is something pregnant.  Sometimes, he is a pregnant wolf.  So you can take your “realism” and shove it where the sun doesn’t shine.  When you write a totes realistic story, with gay characters rather than slash characters, you are disrespecting three groups of people:   

the actors, who are your, sometimes, unwilling muses 

the homosexual community, that you have absolutely no right to speak for

the earlier  slash fans who nurtured this art form, before you ''woke'' idiots came barreling in, with your inclusiveness, and flushed their efforts down the toilet, all at the behest on one selfish man. 

Decent slashers say:  This is a work of fiction and has no bearings on reality.  Then they go out of their way to not include themes that are synonymous with the gay community.  The characters in a properly written story are never explicitly gay.  They just like some guy, even though last week they were with a girl.  And no, that doesn’t make them bisexual either.  Remember, slash is a  platform with a large percentage of straight females and bisexuals don’t want you speaking for them, either.  Otherwise, nobody will dispute the hellers for saying that Dean is bi because he wore a purple shirt, once.  The fed up bisexuals reading insulting meta on how Dean is bisexual, because of his food and clothing choices, are a case in point.  So the character are fantasy slash characters.  If I were to coin a word, then they are slashsexual.  

They are just muses for the woman’s sexual expression.  We don’t need to tell them what we are doing, thereby putting them in an uncomfortable position to amend or dispute our opinion about the subject.  That is plain rude and borderline sexual harassment.  Even if we are women and they are men.  Treat them with the same dignity that you demand for yourself.  Its got nothing to do with them.  Don’t ask them.  Misha, on the other hand, has no shame and will therefore never turn down a question.  He will answer the question in a way that his gullible fangirls like, inflating his ego and giving him permanence in the show.  Has Misha caused irreparable damage?  I am afraid so.  Older women, in the SPN fandoms, get caught up in life so they don’t indulge in slash as much.  And so the brats are running this art form to the ground, teaching nonsense to those that are younger than them, parroting whatever crap Misha spews about slash fiction, in the name of sexual equality, representation and the LGBT. I am not even counting their online behaviour, just pointing out their horrible handling of slash fiction at the behest of Misha Collins.  They still listen to him and its going to get worse and worse, until slash fiction becomes THE most hateful thing about fan culture.   

Please note:

The analysis of slash fiction does not include tinhatting.  Tinhats do not believe that the people they are writing about are mere muses.  Cockles fans and J2 Tinhats believe that they people they are writing about, really are gay, but closeted due to public shame and ostracization.  Tinhats, at least the ones that I came across, do not like to be seen as shippers.  They are a separate entity altogether.  That would be a fascinating topic for the future.  Thank you to the tinhat who reminded me of this, because I completely forgot. 

[thenightling]

Umm...  Uh...  Umm... uh... (The Dreaming related...)

I’m a little disappointed right now.  I’m trying to embrace the parts I like but I’m a nerd and I am compelled to whine about the parts that annoy me.  ‘Tis the nature of Nerdom.

  Warning, here there be ranting and it might be hyperbolic.  

Can someone else take over writing this thing, please?

I don’t know which is worse.  The poor characterization of the old Dreaming comics of the late 90s and early 2000s or the hamhanded allegories in the new The Dreaming.   Poor Merv is now literally a Straw Man about bigotry.  And the Lucien narrations aren’t... good...

I know everyone wants to bring their own flavor to The Sandman Universe and only Neil Gaiman can and will sound like Neil Gaiman but this doesn’t even feel like the characters.   This feels like a self-righteous Marvel comic from a year and a half ago...  And yes, I know that Vertigo is a division of DC, I’m just making the comparison. 

And why the Hell has poor Merv been turned into a thinly disguised Trump Supporter stereotype?  He was always an ass but he was an equal opportunity ass.  WHY would you even WANT to use the blue collar, pumpkin headed scarecrow as your bigot metaphor?  You just made a LITERAL strawman.  This is almost as bad (if not worse) than using Cain to represent misogyny.  

Much like a certain late 90s / early 2000s version of The Dreaming I sense no love for these characters.  It feels like resentment or a belief that they can be used to represent anything at all and to Hell with consistent characterization.  

The Dora-needs-sex scene in issue 1 of The Dreaming felt so pointless other than “Look at us! We have adult content!  Wheee!” It’s like counting all the F bombs in Spartacus: Blood and Sand and realizing most of them were used as filler and or just to remind you that you were watching Starz.

  Some dialogue is just unpleasant to read.  (“Get thee behind me, Creeper.”)   First, Dora, you were created in the 90s.   Creeper wasn’t the usual term in mid-90s. It was usually just creep. I guess she could have picked up on the word from a dreamer so it’s not that bad but she still dresses and wears her hair like the 1990s. 

 Also, Dora, you just slept with this demon and now you’re threatening to crush this being’s testicles for suggesting a bear (which is literally an extension of himself) take part and how dare he still be horny!  As gross as that is, you’re not dealing with a normal bear or normal place and this scene doesn’t “empower” me as a woman.  Anyone else feeling “empowered” by this?!?  Threatening a horny demon immediately after sex with him doesn’t give me a “girl power” feel.  Actually I was never a fan of that slogan because I remember when it was just a marketing gimmick for the Spice Girls.  I wish we had a better woman’s strength slogan.  

Another line that stands out was “Malignant penetration”.   

That was was such an inorganic and forced line, I groaned as soon as it appeared, knowing it was just there for innuendo.   What the Hell!?  This is lazy!  I expect better from The Sandman Universe. 

Way to phone-in witty suggestive dialogue...

 At least they know Brimstone smells like a fart...

Why is it every “empowered” female character has to be edgy, angry at authority, and with a chip on her shoulder now?  It’s turning into a tired cliche.   Do we need to be angry and resentful to be “empowered”?    I’m starting to hate that world, “Empowered.”   It feels contrived and when you sit and think about it, it has a pandering quality that suggests we had no power to begin with.  But that’s a tangent for another day.   

I’m also starting to get annoyed with being smacked in the face with constant reminders that Dora is “Different” and “Dora is special” and “Dreams aren’t supposed to be able to do that” ect...  How many times are you going to tell us how unique she is? 

Also this is getting so blatant.  Lookie, they’re still forming.  They need to be educated.  They’re innocent and still taking shape.  And they’re not really blank after all.   But they can barely speak the language.  And they’re being rounded up by someone who doesn’t care or understand them and kept in pens.  These are children in detention centers.  For God’s sake!

Merv is creating detention centers for children... 

And they are refugees that need sanctuary.  This isn’t symbolic.  This is blatant.  And I feel like I’m being treated like an idiot that is having every little metaphor (and it’s more allegory than metaphor) explained to me.    I don’t mind when writing can make me feel like an idiot (Like discovering the cat in Sandman: Overture was Desire all along) but I don’t like being treated like an idiot who needs everything explained to them.   

And I am dreading what they are going to do to our favorite Jack-o-Lantern and his personality for the October / Halloween issue.   

This is not Merv.   “Make The Dreaming great again” should NOT be a thing.   You have taken the blue collar construction worker type and turned him into an obnoxious allegory.  As I said, Merv was always an ass but he was OUR ass and he never acted quite like this.  This is one of those obnoxious over-the-top political statements that made me wander from Marvel and be embarrassed that I’m a liberal.   

This is also teetering on classism that the only character that can be classified as blue collar worker is the one being used as an ignorant bigot.   Merv had his likable moments in the original Sandman.  This is bordering on offensive.

Also, could someone kindly tell the new writer that unless Daniel manipulated the Griffon’s memory to make him think he was a gift from The Greeks, the Griffon is not of The Dreaming and there for should NOT be changed by the weirdness going on.  He was a gift from the Greeks.

At first I thought The Griffon looking like that was a result of the weirdness going on in The Dreaming and then I was like “Wait a second.  Either Daniel tricked the re-created Griffon into thinking he wasn’t of The Dreaming or he is, as The Wake told us, a gift from the Greek Gods.)

And now Daniel is being messed with and he’s not even in this!  Here, I’ll show you how...

Lucien, disguised as Daniel (and The Dream entities somehow fall for this...) tells Merv to teach The beings and to care for them.   And somehow this is supposed to be out-of-character for Daniel.   Uhh... Why? 

Why do people keep thinking Daniel is supposed to be cold?!    Daniel is supposed to be the warmer, kinder aspect of Dream. 

And yet, here’s Morpheus during his douchiest phase.

Why is it whenever someone other than Neil Gaiman writes Daniel he comes off colder and meaner than Morpheus at his darkest?    I wrote a post a while back explaining my theory as to why this happens but it still baffles me...

https://thenightling.tumblr.com/post/175624611158/theories-about-why-dc-writers-have-not-handled

WHY is the “Care for them” something he wouldn’t say, exactly?!

And poor Lucien.  The constant monologue is weird and yet people are acting like he’s always done this.  Uh... Since when?   It was Morpheus who did most of the narration in the early Sandman and in Sandman: Overture.    Granted there was the weird talk bubble in Dark Night’s metal that made Lucien’s text look like Morpheus’.  It’s enough to conceive a new and weird conspiracy theory.

I’m not really comfortable with poor Lucien’s forgetfulness.  I’m afraid that like the illegal immigration / refugee allegory in that this will be a poorly handled alzheimer's metaphor.      

Okay, I’ve bitched enough.  Now for things I actually like to try to make this post a little less angry and aggressive.  

I like that there’s something mysterious building but I’m afraid it’ll be a let down and something as mundane as Starro again...

I like that now there’s actually a reason Daniel isn’t intervening. 

I love the artwork.  

I haven’t entirely given up on Dora’s potential.   I’m still curious enough to want to know what’s going to happen. 

There are parts actually written well and interestingly, almost like Neil Gaiman, himself. 

And I am still glad that there is new Sandman content but this wasn’t a great first taste of The Dreaming.  I had liked The Sandman Universe 1 well enough but this (The Dreaming 1) ... not so much... 

Anyway, that’s my review of the new Dreaming comic.  Ultimately it wasn’t as good as I hoped and I’m not thrilled with the preachy feel of parts of it.  And Doria’s interesting quality from The Sandman Universe is starting to wane in favor of a cliche chip-on-her-shoulder “empowered” trope and that bugs me because I want to like her.

Anyway...  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_O1hM-k3aUY

@deathlyendless @zalemoonshadow @sorry-for-the-chocolate  @endlessemptynight @minxymojo @vagaryhexxx @thejediviking @fortmarmorus @winterbirdybuddy  @treebrooke79 

[harrish6]

The Guardian Of The Abyss - Chapter 1 - My Fatal Hope

This drawing of my OC was made by the lovely JuneTheGlassesBearer! Look at it! This is my OC, Fatal Hope, one I deigned and created all on my own, and I couldn't be more happy about how they look! Better than all the drawings I made of them! Ahh~! I think I need a moment to calm down.... Phew! Okay, I'm okay. Just needed a moment to fangirl all over the picture. Still can't stop smiling.

This is a story about my OC, Fatal Hope. Fatal Hope is a gender-fluid Skeleton Monster, meaning that sometimes they are male, other times they are female.

To make things easier, when Fatal Hope is male, they will be called 'Fatal'. When they are female, they will be called 'Hope'. The pronouns for them will be 'he' or 'she' as well when they are either male or female/their respectful gender. Characters who do not know this will just use what they want, usually calling Fatal Hope 'He' - unless dressed in a certain way - and thinking him male even when it is Hope. Not their fault, as they do not know that Fatal Hope is gender fluid.

Anyway, I've had this idea of Fatal Hope for a long time! Before even Healing What Was Broken was created. So, I decided to make a story for my OC finally.

Fetal Hope is a Kidnapped/Imprisoned God, Error is a Formed/Forced God, and Ink is a Created/Doesn't Know(that he is one) God. What Fatal Hope is the God of will be in the story.

Fatal Hope is not a "Sans", as they are from another Multiverse where "Undertale" and such does not exist. They are just a skeleton Monster with similar magic/powers, and even then they have mainly have different magic/powers with different EFFECTS/drawbacks than the Sanses and Papyruses do. So, just Fatal Hope. Not Fatal Hope!Sans.

I like to call this version - meaning I nicknamed this version - of Error - in this story - Errant. Errant means "erring or straying from the proper course or standards". And this Error does this right from the get go, all because of Fatal Hope being there right from the start of everything. So, his nickname is "Errant". That way I don't confuse him with the my other Errors.

Fate is not happy. That much is certain. The plans they have made are dying before they even had a chance, and some are erring from their fate because of all of this. So, Fate is not happy at all.

As always, Fate is a bitch. Just saying that now.

-Start Chapter-

Fatal didn't know how long he had been in this endless Abyss he was forced to call home. He had lost count before he could even think of counting. There are no days, just endless black nights that want to devour him. All he could hear was the hungry static, rumble and groans that is the Abyss, and the chains all around him rattling if he moved even a tiny bit.

Sitting on what could be a ledge or step - Fatal couldn't tell, it was all darker than black - Fatal glanced behind him at the vault. Sometimes he wondered if he should just break the chains on him, the Multiverse be damned. Besides, the whole Multiverse was still young. it wasn't like too many people would die-

'No...no. I can't do that.' Fatal mentally sighed. He wasn't that cruel to do something like that. Loneliness must be getting to him once more. At least it wasn't blood lust this time. How Fatal just wanted to stab someone. He blamed growing up in a war torn Multiverse for that one; Craving the fighting and conquering all in one's way. Missing the cheers, the screams and magic in the air. How the blood and dust felt on his bones as he fought, how it tasted as he grinned at all the carnage that surrounded him day in and day out. Hell, he even missed the balls and meetings that his King and Queen held. No matter how bloodied or violent was his Multiverse, no matter how unstable it was, he missed it with all he has.

It just made the loneliness all the more present. He missed his armey, those were his true family. They bled, fought, and cried together. They were supposed to die together, yet it seems he was the only one to live on.

Because of that motherfucking Fate. That damn bitch who seemed to think that they were a God and could control everyone just because they had the power to. There was no such thing as fate, there was too much freewill for that to be a real thing. But, Fate?

Fate is real, and seems to be delusional enough to think they actually are fate just because of their powers. How Fatal just wants to strangle them. To show Fate what he thinks about fate and themselves.

Rage boiled inside of him, making him clinch his fists. Just the sight of the burn marks all over his hands made him want to kill something. In the shape of chains, the burn marks just remind him how he failed to fight the chains the first time. In the end, his Multiverse was shattered and he was dragged down into the ever hungry ABYSS.

Fun times.

Sighing, Fatal pushed the anger in him away for now. There was no use in getting angry right now. Not when there was nothing to fight or anything to protect. The ABYSS not counting of course. He wouldn't care if anything were to happen to the damned place. If it can even be called a "place".

"Another day, another endless darkness to greet me. Bah, if only! Endless darkness would be better, at least it would be quiet." Fatal sighed, leaning back, making the chains on him and surrounding him clank. "What I wouldn't give to see other colors than the ones on me. One can only take so much."

Closing his eyes, Fatal thought back to happier, simpler times. When he was still in his own Multiverse before the bitch of all bitches dragged him into this place with only a few parting words.

-Fatal could still see it, as if he had never left and everything was if the chains had never came.

The Multiverse around him was broken in so many ways. Technology overtaking yet still staying the same no matter what inventions came out. Castles filled with Kings and Queens stood out amid the metal skyscrapers and smoggy skies.

The land was mostly desolate. Dying or already dead. Animals going extant left and right, hunger and starvation was everywhere. Cries of pain, of anger, of hunger and justice ringing out. Acts of violence going up and up, wars of all kinds coming to life. Water was scarce, food was becoming a luxury. This was a fact before Fatal Hope was even born. But Fatal knew the reason why the War truly started, why it went on and why so many fought to their last breath.

"Survival is a most. What you do not have, take."

"Your kingdom is dying. To live on, for the next generation to live, we must do what must be done."

"The Multiverse is unstable, there are too many others and it is too crowded. Food is scarce because of this. Resources are dying out. We must find balance. Do you understand what this means?"

"In War, there are no winners. There is only the ones left standing in the end."

"To live, we must steal. To survive, we must kill all those who stand in out way."

The screams and yells of the armies, the blood in the air as guns go off, the dust on the ground as magic pluses all around, the soft music of the balls, the soft smile of the Queen, the loud laughter of the King, the pout of the young Prince, the joking amongst brothers and sisters in arms; All of it and more was home.

No matter how many armies Fatal fought, no matter how many he killed, he did it all for his home and Kingdom. All for his family, his army. He must stand tall and straight even through the pain, through everything.

Good thing Fatal Hope was raised in such a war torn Multiverse, taught from birth to fight and survive. Taught how to survive in all situations, not just on the battlefield. Fatal found out many things living in his Multiverse, and It made things easier in the long run.

Killing is so easy. Fatal would kill any and all to protect those that he loves and those that are his. Why care about the other lives on the other end? It's not like they care for him and those under his protection. He doesn't know them, so why bother caring at all. It made killing so much easier to him than others, with how he was mentally. Luckily, his army was much like himself.

Fighting and conquering is so much fun. How Fatal loves fighting, the thrill of it all. It might be from so much death and violence in his life, but fighting, even to the death, was just so much fun. It was like a game. Just as life is. The rush of it all, Fatal can still taste the blood and feel the dust on his bones. It made his blood and magic flutter just thinking about it all. To conquer lands was a rush, to fight a whole mini war and decimate the other side was not pretty but it was so much fun.

Smiling can convey many different emotions. Soft and gentle smiles can calm even a dying person. Smiles full of nothing but teeth can show your aggression. Wide smiles that turn into grins can show just how excited someone is. Smiles filled with blood-lust can make the most harden individual shiver with fear. Smiles can convey so much, yet still be considered polite. Sometimes, it is better to show what you think with a smile than words.

Dancing is a great way to become graceful and tell a story. There are many different dances in just one culture, many more if counting other cultures. Dancing is discipline, forcing one to keep inline with the beat. But once learned, it stays. Dancing teaches one to stay light on their feet no matter what move they are doing, making every step apart of a bigger story. Dancing can be aggressive, can be gentle, can be loving, can be lustful. Dancing is much like fighting in a way; both can show so many emotions in the way one moves with the other.

Politics can kill just as easily as taking a knife to the SOUL can. Fatal has seen people die from words alone and it he has learned one thing from being in the courts of Kings and Queens, it's that politics are shady business. Nearly everyone has a knife behind their back as they smile. One wrong word, one wrong move, and suddenly all you have worked for is gone and a assassin is paying you a visit the next night. But at least in politics, one can choose their enemies and allies.

Nothing is black and white, everything is a rainbow of colors and shades. There is no wrong or right, there is no good or bad. People made those ideas and notions to make themselves feel more than the animals that they are. To make themselves seem more than what they are and to feel better about themselves. The funny thing is that these notions change, the definition of what is right and wrong, good and bad, change as time goes on. Fatal knows that when were resources bountiful, killing was seen as a last resort. killing was seen as "Wrong" and "Bad". Now, killing was seen as "Right" and "Good". Enrolling into the army was seen as a must, and no one sugar coated that they were going to be killing many others. But it was okay, because it was "Good" and "Right". There are no such things, Fatal knew this.

Love is to be horded and treasured, held above all else and not taken for granted, for you do not know when your last day will be. It was rare to see love out in public, any kind of love. It was also rare to even be in love or love others in a romantic way in general. Fear of it being taken away from them made sure that it was horded or never happen. But in such a unstable Multiverse, one filled with strife and war, no one knew when it would finally be the day everything ends. So, love was spoken in awe. As if love itself was a God(dess) and hung the stars, moon and sun itself. To have love, to be in love, and to be loved was such a rare thing and needed to be treated as such. It never happened to Fatal, but he knows to treasure even the thought of it.

Never say "Never" or "Impossible". There are no such things. Even impossibilities are still possible. It is only "Never" and "Impossible" when someone doesn't try. It only takes trying to change it all. Suddenly, "Never" is "Always" and "Impossible" is "Possible". So many inventors thought that high tech visors were impossible, that it was impossible for cars to fly and for weapons to have a mind of their own. But, someone tried and suddenly, such things were common to see everyday.

It's okay not to be okay, it's okay to cry and to laugh even in the worse situations. War has taught Fatal that emotions needed to be showed and not bottled up, only hidden when absolutely needed. But after that necessity? It was fine to just cry or show whatever emotion needed. Emotions showed that they were alive, that they were living and breathing. War has messed with Fatal even if he loves fighting, he knows this and will admit to it. He is not okay, will never be okay, but that's fine. Fatal knows that it's fine to be himself even he's not okay or too emotional.

Be yourself, for only yourself can have the final say on what you are. Fatal Hope only had one life, so Fatal Hope was going to do it the way they wanted. The funny thing is that no one was bothered by them being genderfluid. They just wanted a sign or a way of knowing when Fatal Hope was male or female. So, Hope bought a pink ribbon, tied it around her neck and told everyone that when she is wearing the ribbon around her neck, she is in fact female and Hope. Then, when he was Fatal, he just tied it around his left leg for safe keeping. Such a easy thing to do and no words needed after the first explanation.

Your army is your family, you will live and die with them and for them. Fatal joined the army young, joined the military young. It was the only safe way to get food and he had no one else to fall back on even at a very young age. There were a ton of times where parents even gave up their children to the military, to be raised to be of use to the military and/or to have a better life. While that did not happen to Fatal, he knows that the whole military was a family. You bleed with them, you eat with them, you sleep by them, you breath with them and you walk to you possible death with them every time there is a battle to be waged. Sometimes, the army is all they have and is their family. Fatal truly had wanted to die for them all, and would have too. He was a leader after all, the leader of a whole army in fact. He has lead his army into many battles, and every single one he would have died for any of them. Yet....the chai-!-----------------

-'No! Don't think about it! Not now! Anger is no use when there is nothing to fight! Nothing to protect.'-

These and so many other things that Fatal had found out throughout his life and made life so much grander, so much more fun than it should have been. How he missed it. The smiling faces, the fighting, the blood bath that was War.

Missed his army, his family.

But those motherfucking chains-!

"P E R F E C T . P R O T E C T I V E  G U A R D I A N  O F  T H I S  M U L T I V E R S E , Y O U  A R E  N O W  M Y  F I R S T  G O D  A N D  J U D G E .  M Y  G U A R D I A N  O F  T H E  A B Y S S."

"F A T A L  H O P E; G O D  O F  B A L A N C E  A N D  G U A R D I A N  O F  T H E  A B Y S S . F A T E  H A S  D E E M E D  I T  S O !"

Black chains were choking him. He tired to struggle, fought with everything he had. Made step after step, more chains coming to life. Some going into his eyes sockets, pulling back and back. The world around him shifting, breaking further and further. Soon, the ground under him gave way, forcing him to fall. The chains pulled him down.

All the while, the voice laughed and laughed.

"MERCY!"-

Fatal was jerked out of his thoughts, looking around in shock. For a moment, he thought he heard another voice other than his own and the noise that is the ABYSS.

"Finally lost your mind, Fatal." The shackled skeleton chuckled to himself. "Hearing things is always the first sign-"

"PL-LEA-A-ASE! HE-E-E-ELP!"

Before he even knew what he was doing, Fatal was standing up tall and straight, searching for any place the voice could have came from.

'Another....voice....Oh, my. Seems I do have some fatal hope left in me.' Fatal grinned widely, chains clacking together as he moved to the voice. Starting to go faster and faster, soon cautiously running to the sound. 'Another voice means another person. A way out. Yet, they are calling for help. Trouble. If someone calls for help, it's only polite to answer it.'

Fatal might not know what or who was calling for help, but he once used to be a leader of a military, one of them at least. Protecting others was something that he used to do all the time, something that he loved to do and something that made him Fatal Hope. It was one of the reasons he joined the army besides wanting to eat and survive. The call might lead to something new, a way out even if he is lucky.

a deadly, fatal hope was growing inside of his chained up SOUL. For the first time since getting dragged down into the ABYSS, Fatal felt hopeful that this will all work out. That everything will be fine.

That there might be a way for him to get out; mainly to help the one calling for help and to find Fate. Fatal Hope really wants to kill - slaughter, maim, spit on, set on fire, laugh at, strangle, ect. - Fate, no use in sugar coating it.

But, it all came down to one thing and one thing only. Fate didn't matter right now. No, the only thing that did was the person screaming.

'Don't worry!' Fatal Hope ran as fast as he could, using all his training to move as quick as he can towards where the voice was coming from. The ABYSS'S rumbling and groans of hunger trying to drown out the call, but Fatal will not stop even if the call ends. He'll keep going even if it takes years to find the other person who is screaming out.

Someone was calling for help.

Fatal Hope was going to answer the call even if it was the last thing they did.

-End Chapter-

Fatal Hope - FH - doesn't believe in fate. They just think Fate as a person/Monster with powers/a whole lot of magic. FH thinks as Fate as a person, someone alive. Not a God. This makes it harder for Fate to control FH, as FH just straight up does not believe in them and only believes that they are a person with power. FH's Multiverse did not have Gods, and if they did, they were dead before FH was born. FH choices are their own, and they will deal with the consequences that their actions lead them with a grin and smile.

Really, FH is still trying to come around to the idea of them being a God. A Guardian is one thing, they are used to protecting and fighting in the war they were in, but a God? Yeah, FH doesn't believe in the whole thing yet knows that they were given powers to become one - to be one. But just because Fate wants them to be a God, doesn't mean they will do it. The only thing stopping FH from just ripping the chains off of them is the fact that too many would die because of it. Naive innocence would die.

But, that doesn't mean they won't. All they need is one little reason, and they will break free from the chains and break the lock and key on the ABYSS.

FH has a pink ribbon tied around their left leg. When they are "Hope", she ties the ribbon around her neck to show this. This is from their time in their own Multiverse, as it showed allies and the army what gender FH was without a word needed other than the first time.

So, even if FH is wearing a dress, if they are not wearing the pink ribbon around their neck - just above the shackle around their neck - it means they are male and are "Fatal". The same goes the other way, if they are wearing a suit and have the pink ribbon around their neck, they are female and "Hope". Clothes are clothes to me, cloth and have no gender or are for one gender alone.

FH is from a whole different Multiverse, a unstable Multiverse. One filled with starvation, pain, war, death and was very unstable - it showed to everyone how unstable it was. Resources were becoming scarce because of how over filled the Multiverse was, so war was fought for them. There are other reasons as well, but that is the main reason it was fought for. Because of this, Fatal Hope will have issues, cultural differences, and are..... well, let's just say that FH has more than one layer to themselves. For good reasons too. And yes, FH loves to fight and can get violent.

Fatal Hope is the God of Balance, and because of that, they are balanced in different ways. One moment, they can be calm and gentle, next violent and aggressive. It's almost like a split personality, but not as it does blend together and there are reasons for FH being this way. The funny part is that they are random, coming off as if chaos more than balance. but balance is all about having both good and bad, mixing together and that can be shown in many different ways.

FH is not very balanced though, not in the way Fate wants that is, nor will they be impartial like balance should be. Not believing in fate does lower Fate's power over them, but there are ways that Fate is going to try and bring FH to heel. More on this will be in the next chapter as well as a explanation. Also more on FH's past and them in general.

Also, yes, I will have/use Fatal Hope and Errant in Falling Into A Different Destiny; What If Version. Hard not too, I already know I am going to have too much fun with them both.