#Ugh and the self doubt he has on if he’s a good person or not
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mellethernil · 1 year ago
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do you think Aragorn freaked out the first time he killed someone? Like growing up w elves and they never dared bad history there and such
and being w the rangers ofc he was gonna be in situations where it was man vs man and to protect himself and others he had to
he’d put on a brave face after the rangers have to call out his name more than twice but he really has no clue how to process what he just did
overtime it gets easier but there’s still nights where he can’t close his eyes without picturing the light fade from someone else’s
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belovedcloud · 6 months ago
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Boxes
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pairing: older! neighbour! leon kennedy x fem! reader
✎ notes: older leon has been rotting my brain recently, especially DI leon ugh. i'm making another fic with him but I honestly might do vendetta leon. i just know this man would help you out with moving in.
➤ WC: 3K
➤ CW: strangers to lovers? pet names: sweetheart, love, baby, darling, good girl. reader is seen to be in their low 20s whilst leon being 38. leon feeling ashamed of himself for liking you, mentions of ada, helena, claire. leon has a fleshlight. touch starved Leon. both you and Leon are a bit tipsy. tit play, leon eating you out, p in v (unprotected sex), aftercare.
MINORS DNI!
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Carrying boxes was strenuous. You moved in a few weeks ago from your parents house, it was time for a new start. Although, your arms seem to regret the decision as you lift up the remainder of your boxes to the 12th floor. But it wasn't as bad when you had a certain man by your side. Leon was lucky enough to see you struggle your way up the apartment complex. Your first meeting with him had a slight tinge of embarrassment but soon died down as you got to know each other soon enough. With Leon carrying all of your heavy belongings such as your disheveled chairs and whatnot - you could see the strain on his muscles, it was attractive without a doubt. Despite the fact that he was older than you, the way he carried himself with looks and personality made him extremely enchanting. He was a man of charisma.
Today was like no other, however, it was the last lot of boxes you had stored in your parents house. Therefore, it shouldn't be that hard right? Leon was coming to help you out anyways, he insisted.
A few minutes passed, your back towards your car as you wait for Leon to come out of the complex. A similar silhouette appeared, Leon closed the door behind him - approaching you with a small smile. "Last set today then?" He spoke out to you as he opened the trunk of the car. "Yeah, good for you right? Your old back won't be cracking every 5 minutes" You teased leading to Leon giving a low chuckle as he looked at you. "Old? You wound me." He laughed out as he took an airy box. "I don't look that old do I?" He passed the package to you, taking a hefty one for himself. "No... no, you look good." You mumbled out, hoping he didn't take the compliment in a different way. "Good? I'll take it." Leon gave you a smirk as he shifted the box, walking towards the door. You hurried up behind him, ensuring you didn't make yourself look weird. Entering into the complex with a nervous look on your face. Even though moving in was arduous, the thoughts of not speaking to Leon daily made you feel quite upset. How would you even make up an excuse to see him? Knowing him for a few weeks was short but the way you linked with each other was different. It was like you were friends for years, comfort was found within you when you spoke to Leon. If only you knew how he felt about you.
Leon felt bad. He felt ashamed that he found you so attractive. The way your shirt hugged your body and your jeans show the curvature of your ass and your thighs strained. You were so much younger than him - he couldn't help his mind wandering to images of you whilst he laid in his own bed. Wishing it was yours. He built your bedframe, he helped you place the soft clean mattress on top. Yet he felt pure filth in his self as he thought of your body on his. His hands intertwined with yours as ideas of fucking you flooded his brain. Night after night it would be the same for him, his cock thrusting into his hand or fleshlight. He tried to think of anyone else but you. Ada, Claire, Helena could only stay in his mind for a mere 20 seconds before his brain cogged back to you. You. It wouldn't help hearing you over the thins walls as you touched yourself. The softest but most pornographic moans leaving your lips. Leon only wished that it was him making you sound that way, but it was wrong. What would his friends think if he dated you? He believed he was out of your league - if only he knew about the sinful thoughts you had about him too when you indulged in your own pleasure. Two fingers thrusting into your cunt wishing it was his, gushing all over your thighs as images of him engulfed your brain.
"Stay here, I'll get the last few boxes for you." Leon maintained a steady voice shaking out the immoral ideas in his head. Keeping a level-headed smile he gave you a small wave before you could argue back. Seeing his back turned towards you, your eyes subconsciously wandered on it. Soon landing onto his biceps, subtle veins leading to his hands as he went stood in front of the elevator. Snapping yourself out of your trance, you unpacked the two boxes you and Leon took up. Placing the glasses into the kitchen cabinet and hanging up clothes was therapeutic in some way. Helping you calm yourself from your thoughts on Leon as you felt a wet patch on your panties. Pouring out a glass of wine for two as you waited for Leon to come back.
"I think that's it.. unless you have some hidden ones in your car?" He joked as he placed down the final box to the side, looking up to see you with two glasses of wine in your hand. "Oh?" He smiled, stretching his back before walking to you. "Seems like you need this then." You giggled passing him the glass, Leon rolling his eyes as he took it. "Thank you for the past few weeks helping me move in... I was wondering if you wanted to relax for a bit?" You murmured, sitting down on your couch. Leon soon accompanying you. "How can I say no?" He gave you a slight smirk as the rim of the wine glass pressed against his lips, the alcoholic liquid sliding down his throat.
A bottle or two of wine later caused the both of you to erupt into laughter and giggles - getting to know each other quite well. You learned that Leon worked for the government, although not being able to go into grave detail, he was an important figure for the USA. It wasn't long until you also explained what your job was, explaining in why you chose your path. However, you felt hot. Way too hot as you sensed his eyes gaze all over you. Lingering onto your lips and eyes as he looked at you with such awe and fascination. Leon felt warm within himself, you were like a new light that he had been longing for. You spoke without care, refreshing for him as his job withheld such secrecy. An urge secreted in him as your soft lips moved with grace. He yearned for you, and it was becoming evident from the pained strain in his jeans.
Taking another sip from your drink, you spoke without thinking. "How's your love life?" Shit. Was that too personal? Hoping for the best outcome you fiddled with your glass as your eyes wandered to his face, trying to decipher what expression he had. "Boring. If I'm being honest with you, I haven't dated anyone for years." A deep chuckle elicited out of his throat. The rasp laced in his tone giving you a shiver. "Seriously? You're joking." A giggle came out of you. Was he actually single? "Nope. But I'm surprised you don't have a certain someone here. You've got a boyfriend haven't you?" Leon hiccupped out, the alcohol making him feel fuzzy. To his surprise, your head shook side to side. "No, I'm single alright." You said with a soft smile plastered on your face. Leon genuinely couldn't believe it. A woman like you single? "Now that's a surprise." Leon grinned as he finished his 4th glass of wine. "Well, I'm sure you'll be able to find a man of your age. Although most of them are probably a pain in your ass." He laid back onto the couch, his arm behind his head. Again, your eyes couldn't help but avert to the flex of his bicep. This time, it didn't go unnoticed.
"You're right." A sigh came from your lips, "Which is why I don't usually go for guys my age." You admitted, making Leon confused. So who did you go for? "Hm? So you like younger men?" He asked, staring into your eyes with his own lustful ones. Praying that what you were looking for was the opposite of young. A mellow giggle followed out of your mouth as you shook your head once more. "No, I like older men." Leon's smirk became wider as those words left your mouth. Maybe he had a chance after all. Perhaps his wrongful thoughts were okay with you - that you wouldn't mind a man near twice your age to fuck you. "Really sweetheart?" A low groan drawn out his throat, his eyes basically fucking you. That same heat returned to you, just much more insatiable.
It was like a flip in you switched, your body longing for touch as so for Leon. Sloppy kisses shared between you two as Leon's hands gripped the fat on your hips. Subconsciously grinding himself into you as he felt your clit throb on his crotch. Your quiet whimpers muffled by the crashing of yours and Leon's lips unmethodical rhythms as saliva was shared. "F-Fuck.." A moan left Leon's lips, his head clouded by lust as he tapped your legs. "Wrap 'em around me darling." He demanded as he held you up, your legs squeezed tight around his waist - your irregular breathing echoing in his mind. Leon wasn't going to just fuck you on the couch, he wanted to show you his love. Heavy footsteps followed behind him as he nudged your bedroom door open, placing you gently on your newly built bed. "Let's see how well I built this frame, yeah?" Leon joked as he littered your neck with butterfly kisses. Pinning you down, stopping your squirming beneath him. "L-Leon..." That was enough to get him going, the pornographic moan after the lustful mumble of his name had his cock throbbing for more. He wanted you, he needed you.
Leon's hands slowly crept under your shirt, caressing your chest as he kneaded your tits. Pinching at your nipples to elicit another whine out of you. Your soft, mellow skin opposed his calloused hands. The hands that killed bioweapons were fondling with your tits, shakily taking off your shirt to show them in true beauty. "So fucking gorgeous." Leon groaned out, without a doubt in his mind he shoved his head in between your breasts. Your whimpers echoed throughout your bedroom, just to be stopped as you gasped when you felt his knee part your legs. Rubbing your clothed clit as he sucked on the plush parts of your tits. His hands methodically unbuttoned your jeans, slowly pulling them off you as he saw your pretty laced panties. They would've looked so innocent if it wasn't for the soaked wet patch in the middle of them. "All this for me baby?" He murmured, enchanted by how wet you were. You could couldn't help but frantically nod your head, needing to feel his touch somewhere else. "P-Please Leon.. need you to touch me." You moaned gently, your hips bucking for any type of touch. Who was he to say no to such a polite question? "Alright sweetheart.. C'mon spread your legs f'me." He ordered and you obeyed, feeling like mush in his hands.
The pads of his fingers played with the lace and the little bow at the top. Cute. Slowly, he slid your panties to the side, your slick leaving a small strand attached to the material. Leon was mesmerized by the sight, yet you felt embarrassed. Trying to close your legs failed as his strong hands pried you open. "Don't close 'em love, you're so beautiful. Let me appreciate you, yeah?" He groaned, feeling himself rut into your fresh linen sheets. Leon positioned himself in front of your clit, feeling his mouth water as he looked at it. His eyes flickering to you before asking "Do you want me to carry on darling?" His hot breath tickling you, a soft moan squeezed out your throat. "Yes.. Please Leon.. Want your tongue on my clit." Leon gave you a deep chuckle in response, his eyes flickering back to your clit. "'Atta girl.. Didn't know you were so dirty." He whispered before licking your slit, slowly capturing you in his mouth.
This was pure filth. Your moans alongside the wet sounds your pussy was making as Leon's pistoned two fingers in and out of you. His tongue skillfully flicking over your clit as his baby blue eyes watched your reactions. Your fingers felt themselves entangled in Leon's hair, pulling at his strands as choked moans fell out of your mouth. Chasing for that sweet release, you subconsciously bucked your hips, allowing for Leon's nose to press up against your clit. Deep, shallow moans trembled into your clit as Leon was determined to make you cum. He wanted all of you, he needed you to be ready for his cock. "C'mon, give it to me baby." He pressed his tongue against you, curving his fingers in you in the right spot. "L-Leon... I'm gonna.." Your sentence was soon cut off by the shaking of your body as the coil in you snapped. The orgasm took over your body, your lips chanting his name as you pulled on his hair. Granting you a groan from Leon as he swallowed your cum. "So sweet." He chuckled, pulling himself off you. Before pulling your face close to his, allowing you to taste yourself as he kissed you.
Leon felt a hand tug on his shirt, your pleading eyes staring into his blue ones. A smirk tugged his face as he took off his shirt. Slowly unbuckling his belt, removing his jeans alongside it too. Your cunt ached to be fucked, your mind telling you that only Leon could satisfy your needs.
He pulled down his boxers, a pretty dark red tip beamed at you. Glistening with pre-cum smeared all of it. You couldn't help but stare as Leon's face flushed a light pink. "Fuck.. Don't look at it like that sweetheart." He moaned softly, positioning himself right up against your entrance. "You ready?" His hand slowly caressed your face, a nod coming from you as he intertwined his hand with yours. He was big. Real fucking big as you felt yourself stretch open, your eyes rolling back in pain mixed with pleasure. Fuck. Leon could've came right there as he saw your expression change. You were so attractive. He slowly rutted himself into you, moaning your name as his hips sputtered. "Y-You alright?" He stuttered out, you were so tight. "Yeah.. I'm okay. You can move Leon." A soft smile appeared on your face, he couldn't help but reciprocate it back. He moved his hips, his thrusts soft - but it was hard to keep it that way after a minute. His thighs started to slap against yours as his dick pistoned into you. Leon threw his head back in otherworldly pleasure, moaning sweet nothings as he felt himself lose himself inside of you. You were no different. Your moans and screams increased in volume and pitch as you felt him pound into you. Your legs shaking in pleasure as you felt that same coil tighten in you again. "My good girl.. f-fuck so fucking good f'me." Leon growled, feeling his body become weak to your pheromones. He buried his head into your neck, marking you with lovebites. He felt his dick throb as his hips moved without thought.
"Leon.. I'm gonna cum again.. Feels too good." Mewls escaped from your throat as your hands scrapped at his back. Scratching him. The pain mixed with pleasure was enough for Leon to start panting as he felt himself get close. "Cum for me, please cum for me baby.." He whined as he thrusted into your sweet little pussy. You were so pretty for him, his good girl. The marks on your neck slowly started to become more evident, a smirk appeared on his face as he saw you scrunch up your face. His hand snaked down to your clit, slowly rubbing it. Giving you a whole new sensation as you felt his dick pulsate inside you. "I.. I.. Leon!" The coil in you snapped again, twice as hard as you creamed all over his cock. He didn't stop smacking himself into you, a white ring forming at the base. Leon started to chase his own high. "Take it, take it, take it." He chanted as he felt his hips stammer. The clapping of your skin quickly died down as Leon jerked himself out of you, rubbing his dick as his cum splattered all over your stomach. You couldn't help but think how handsome he looked as he threw his head back, moaning your name.
After both of your highs, Leon practically collapsed on top of you. "G-Get off.. You're so heavy." You tried to push him off, a laugh escaping Leon's lips as he pulled himself off of you. Pressing a soft kiss against your lips. He climbed out of your bed, pulling up his boxers and walked out of your bedroom. Soon, he returned with a damp cloth in his hand with two bottles of water in the other. Whilst wiping you down, Leon flashed you a quick smile and passed you the cold bottle. Your lips pursed the top as you gulped down the liquid. "C'mon... Let's shower." He took his hand into yours, lifting you up from your bed and carrying you to your bathroom. Your hot thighs pressed against the cold counter as he flipped the shower on. "Hey guess what." Leon couldn't help but giggle out the sentence. Your eyebrow cocked up as you looked over to him. "What?" You asked him with a smile on your face.
"At least we know I built the frame right." He laughed out, finding himself hilarious. "Oh shut up." Your laughter soon followed along.
likes, comments and reblogs are appreciated! thank u for reading :)
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margindoodles2407 · 14 days ago
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YOU
YOU GET IT
The thing about me is I will, at any point of the day, stop whatever I'm doing to drawl, "Ooooh, meteor shower" in Hevy's voice.
#because guess what. i do this too#I DO THIS TOO#this arc is actually my favorite tcw arc. for personal reasons. one of those being it has some absolutely iconic lines#i mean. there's this one. then you have “would you shut UP with instructions?? you're not in CHARGE”#(which is with a lot of siblings something i hear on a near-daily basis anyway XD )#of course there's “ARC TROOPERS follow ORDERS” and the resulting fistfight#there's “now let's hear from the squad that ran the test in record time- ARC Trooper time!”#and then THE most self-depricating “think he means US boys?”#(shortly followed by the galaxy's most sarcastic “Well. BrAvO fOr BrAvO sQuAd”#there is the absolute heart-wringer of a scene that is “we're just numbers Ninety-Nine! ...Just numbers”#AND THEN “not to me. to me... you've always had a name”#(SCREAMING. BY THE WAY)#then we go to the rishi moon. and we've got echo's iconic “personally i LIKE that it's so quiet. i can catch up on the reg manuals”#(and the ensuing teasing)#and then “uh. shouldn't you be watching your scope Hevy?” “sure. let's take a look.”#*looks. mockingly. and then* “wow. would you look at that? all clear! JUST LIKE THE LAST HUNDRED TIMES I CHECKED”#the absolutely CLASSIC “looks like we've got ourselves a couple of SHINIES”#(one of the reasons i love this episode is because it lets rex be the silly chaos man for once)#and then. AND THEN. “uhh... do we take prisoners?” “I DON'T.” and ugh i am sobbing once again#and then there's ARC Troopers which is a glorious episode for the sheer amount of fives and echo that we get#and i love this entire episode but i must say that without a doubt there is one line that stands above the rest#(and i promise this isn't just my fives-centric bias showing through)#because “look around you. we're one and the same- same heart; same blood. our training is IN our blood. and MY blood's boiling for a fight!#is SUCH a line. like wow what were the clone wars writers ON. this is POETRY. i want to like. embroider this into a tapestry#oh and then at the end when rex is like “you boys showed real bravery out there. reminds me of me actually.”#like oh rex you silly man. it's like the meme of obama giving a medal of honor to obama. i am laughing hysterically#okay so this was really long but all this to say: you are correct and should keep doing this because you're in good company :D#star wars#look at my guys
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mrsbarnesblog · 1 year ago
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I trust you
masterlist ko-fi ao3
Summary: when Bucky comes back from a mission with a knife wound there is only one person who can convince him to get help.
Words count: 3.5k
Warnings: angst and fluff, injury, wounds, low self-esteem, bucky has trust issues and needs a hug, touch starved bucky,
Author’s note: ugh just let me hold my baby and kiss his cute sad face omggg... anyways, idk why I rarely write angsty things, I really wanna do something new, so if you have any ideas let me know! 💘
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It was almost eight o'clock in the evening when FRIDAY reported that the guys' quinjet should arrive at the compound within an hour.
Steve, Sam, and Bucky went on another mission to destroy HYDRA almost two weeks ago. As usual, none of you could get any news from them because they couldn't risk giving away their whereabouts.
It was foolish to assume that you weren't worried about them. Especially for one person. Bucky.
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You and the former Winter Soldier met about six months ago when Steve and Sam first brought him to the tower. Steve was really worried about his old best friend, so before bringing Bucky to the tower, he talked with the team and asked all of you to give Bucky space.
Of course, you knew who he was from the day Steve found out that Bucky was alive. You have seen hundreds of reports and photographs on TV and on the Internet about The Winter Soldier, a ruthless killer who was always invisible but too damn good at his missions. He is the man who was turned into a weapon against his will.
When Steve introduced him, the whole team just nodded and shared awkward smiles, and Bucky himself kept his eyes on the ground. The whole situation was too intense, and no one, not even the funny and sarcastic Tony Stark, knew what to do or say. You actually thought that it might be rude to just stand there and look at him, as if he was a wild animal. Looking at this shy and uncomfortable-looking man before you, you knew that the smallest thing you could get him was to show that he was welcomed in this tower and that everyone was on his side. So, pushing away your own shyness and nerves, you stepped forward, holding out your right hand.
"Hi, my name is Y/N.  It's nice to meet you. I hope you’ll feel comfortable around here." You offered your warmest and most sincere smile, trying not to show nervousness.
Bucky slowly raised his head, genuinely surprised that anyone else had actually spoken to him besides Steve. It's nice to meet you. When had he heard those words for the last time?
Your eyes met, and you could have sworn all the air was out of your lungs. His eyes were even more beautiful than in those rare, high-quality photographs. He looked truly beautiful, with long hair and blue eyes, even though you could see that he was tired—physically and even more emotionally. You stood for what seemed like an eternity, looking at each other's faces, until Bucky got a little nudge from Steve on the arm.
Only then did his gaze move to your still outstretched arm. He hesitated a bit, unsure if he wanted to be touched or feel someone’s warm skin. It’s been too long since another person wanted to touch him without causing any harm. Even Steve gave him minimal physical contact. Always through the gloves or thick jacket, and Bucky didn’t know the true reason for this—whether it was because Steve cared about his feelings or he just didn't want to do that. But then Bucky looked at you again, and he already knew that you would be his death.
You were so beautiful. Probably the most attractive person he has ever seen. It was still morning, and he assumed that you planned to have a day for yourself because you had no makeup, your hair was a little bit messy, and you looked really comfy in a big sweater and a pair of black leggings. Oh, and he definitely noticed your cute, fluffy pink socks. Your eyes were full of friendliness and comfort, so it made him want to trust you. Your lips curled into a warm smile, and he had no doubt that you wanted to make him feel comfortable on the team.
Bucky lifted the corners of his lips slightly, meeting your eyes again, and held out his right hand to you, still feeling awkward. Especially when the whole team around you watches your interaction too closely.
 "Hi."
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When the Quinjet landed on the territory, you couldn't calm your pounding heart. Natasha, who was standing a couple of steps away from you, of course, noticed your condition but didn’t say anything and just sent you a reassuring smile. She knew you'd calm down when Bucky was by your side.
Sam got out first. He looked tired, had a couple of scratches and bruises, but was generally fine.
"Sam!  God, I'm glad you're okay." You said, running closer to him. "How is Bucky? And Steve? Are they okay?" Your worried eyes ran across his face, trying to find answers, but he only pursed his lips and lowered his eyes to the ground.
"Steve’s fine, and Bucky, um... I think you should see it yourself. And I think you need to have a serious talk with this idiot because he doesn't listen to us." Your brows furrowed, but before you could ask anything else, footsteps and stifled moans were heard behind Sam.
It felt like your heart stopped as soon as you saw him. Blood flowed from his temple and lip, and an already darkening bruise adorned his right cheekbone. Your eyes rushed down, trying to find all the damage, and then you saw it. Bucky kept his right hand on his left side. His entire palm was scarlet red as the blood passed through his thick suit and soaked through his fingers. Your mouth opened involuntarily, and your eyes instantly filled with tears.
Of course, this was not his first mission, but he always returned almost without any injuries or with something that quickly healed because of his supersoldier serum. It has never been so bad.
Before you knew it, you were already standing next to him. Tears flowed freely down your face, and you raised your hands up, wanting to touch him, but they froze in the air.
 "Bucky…" You sobbed, looking straight into his eyes.
 "Hello, doll" He smiled reassuringly at you, but you saw how he pressed his teeth together to ease the pain. He didn’t want to scare you.
"Bucky, God, wh-what happened? You need to go to the hospital wing. You’re losing a lot of blood!" You gently took his metal hand, but before you could lead him away, he removed it and moved away a little.
"It's all right, doll.  Nothing that I can't handle on my own. Trust me, I’ve experienced worse."
"Buck, Y/N is right." You notice Steve for the first time because all your attention has been focused on Bucky since he appeared. "That punk cut you pretty deep; it needs to be stitched up."
"You know, I never go to the hospital wing." He purses his lips awkwardly, looking down.
Of course. Of course you knew it. Everyone in the tower knew that the Winter Soldier didn't like being touched or visiting doctors, and he had never asked for any kind of help. He always limited himself to a short handshake or a pat on the back from his best friend.
But you also knew that Bucky couldn't take off his clothes in front of anyone. Too many scars from bullets, knives, and other things that HYDRA used to torture him He confessed this to you one evening when you were sitting in the dark in the common room after his nightmare.
In those six months, you got close enough to him that he trusted you to sit with him in the stillness of the night and share his fears. But he still avoided touching and, of course, did not want to show his body to anyone. Even you. Especially to you.
You were one of the few good things in his life. Someone who genuinely wanted to spend time with him, who wasn’t afraid of him, and who was always kind and supportive. Bucky didn't want to lose you. And he knew that if you ever saw him with those ugly marks all over his body, you would run away without looking back. Because who would like it?
The hand that took hundreds of lives. The hand that was forever connected to his body left a big reminder that he was, in fact, just an experiment that went too well. He often looked at his shoulder in the mirror with anger and despair, wanting to get rid of this mixture of scars and torn skin. Obviously, when HYDRA put that prosthetic on him, they didn't care much about looks or pain, so they just hooked it on the way they did.
"Bucky, please listen to me." You sobbed, moving closer to him again. "I know you're afraid to go there, but please, you have to do it, otherwise, you'll lose too much blood or just get an infection." You hugged yourself with your hands as your body began to tremble with concern for the person in front of you. "It can leave a big scar." You whispered and saw that Bucky’s jaw clenched again. You didn’t want him to think that there was something wrong with having scars, but you knew that it was emotionally too hard for him to deal with them.
"I'm sorry, doll, but I can't," he pursed his lips, shaking his head, "you know I can't do it."
"Bucky…" you whispered as more tears started flooding your face. You were so focused on Bucky that you didn't even pay attention to your friends, who stood aside and pretended not to eavesdrop on your conversation.
"Don't cry because of me, doll, please, you don't have to cry." Bucky's voice lowered to a whisper as he worked up the courage to use his thumb to wipe a tear from your right cheek with a metal finger.
You took advantage of the opportunity, grabbing his metal wrist and pressing his hand closer against your cheek.
 "Please, Bucky. Then let's go to your room. I can help you if you don't want to undress there.
"I don't think it's a good idea either, doll.  You don't need to see it."
"James," you focused on his eyes, rubbing small circles with your thumb into his wrist, "it'll be alright, I promise. I'm not afraid of you. I won’t leave. I'll take care of you. Please do it for me."
You were hurt by his gaze. You've seen a thousand thoughts go through that head. Doubt, fear, uncertainty, and pain. He couldn't lose you. Couldn't lose what you had. Even if he wanted so much more, he was content just being around you. He couldn't lose you to a damn ugly piece of metal attached to him.
But you looked at him like your life depended on it. Tears were still running down your cheeks. You were hurt because of him. But you refused to give up and let his self-doubt win this fight. You continued to gently massage his metal wrist as you placed a light kiss on it. And he could no longer resist you.
"Fine."
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"It's better if we do this in the bathroom," you said as you closed the door to Bucky's room behind you. You quickly walked past him, going into the bathroom and pulling out the first aid kit you knew was in the bottom drawer. You felt comfortable being a little bit bossy here, and Bucky didn’t mind it.
He quietly followed you, watching you with an unsure face. His blood was still soaking through his arm, but that didn't bother him as much as the fact that he'd have to undress in front of you and that at some point you would touch him.
Once all the necessary things were ready, you turned to face Bucky, already preparing to help him out. But as soon as your hands went up to help him unbuckle his suit, he staggered back, and you froze with your hands in the air. For a few seconds, you silently looked into each other's eyes, then you moved, trying to understand his reaction, and what you saw made your heart ache.
His brows were slightly furrowed, and the corners of his lips were turned down. His eyes always told you everything that he tried to hide, and right now they told you how scared and insecure Bucky actually was.
"I don't think I can do it." Bucky whispered softly, casting his eyes down in shame.
"Hey James, look at me," you said, taking his face in your hands. "I'm your friend, you know? I won't hurt you. I won’t judge you. I won't do anything against your will. But I need to help you because I can see how much pain you're in," you sighed, running your fingers over his cheekbones. "I know it's hard. And I know you're scared or shy, but I'm here for you. None of this scares me, and I'll be as gentle with you as I can, okay? You can tell me if it becomes too much, and I'll stop. I promise."  You could see the tears forming in his eyes, and you couldn't help feeling the pain that this beautiful man in front of you had been without care and affection for so long.
Bucky nodded slightly, giving you permission to continue.
"I’ll clean up your wound on the ribs, and then we can take care of your face." You carefully removed your hands from his, now placing them on the clasps of his suit. You opened them one by one, and when you finally got to the last one, you helped Bucky carefully remove that piece of clothing. Next on the way was a stretchy long-sleeve shirt, and by glancing at the wound, you could see that all the tissue around it was completely covered in blood.
"So, now I'm going to carefully lift up the shirt so you can take it off and not bother your wound too much, okay?" you asked, running your eyes over Bucky's face to understand his emotions. He took a deep breath, as if preparing for the worst, but nodded anyway.
You started to slowly lift up his shirt, helping Bucky pull his hands out one by one, and then tossed that no longer needed rag into the bathtub.
"Oh god," you muttered softly, looking at the wound that seemed to be even bigger now.
Bucky thought that you said it about his appearance in general, so he lifted his head up to the ceiling to stop angry tears from falling.
Come on, Buck, we need to sew this up so it doesn't leave a scar. Do you think you can sit on the counter next to the sink?" You looked at Bucky, but you couldn't meet his eyes. You knew that he was at the edge, his body trembled a little bit, but he still listened to you and silently jumped up on the free space near the sink.
"Bucky," you said quietly, trying to be as gentle as you could. "I see you right now, and I’m not going anywhere, you hear me?" You put your hand back on his face, making him meet your eyes. Before you could think, you placed your right hand on his chest, causing his eyes to instantly widen in surprise. His skin was very warm and silky, even though there were a lot of scars from different conditions. You gently moved your hand, showing Bucky that you’re not afraid, that you’re not a threat, and that he can trust you. "You're doing well, it’s okay," you said as you started rubbing soothing circles on his shoulder.
You backed off a little, finally picking up all the necessary things, and began to sanitize and then stitch up the wound. Every time you needed to put your hand on your skin, you felt Bucky instantly tense under your touch, but you tried to send him quiet words of encouragement and praise. Bucky was very quiet, not making a sound even when the needle pierced his skin. His face wasn’t in bad condition, and Super Soldier serum almost healed them, so you decided to only sanitize and clean his skin.
"Well, you did a great job, James. I'm proud of you." About twenty minutes later, you finally tied the bandage and began to put everything back in the drawer, but then felt a touch on your arm.
You looked back at Bucky, only to meet tear-filled eyes.
"No one has ever taken care of me in a long time, Y/N." You stepped closer to Bucky again, unconsciously placing your hands on his shoulders. "I feel ashamed of my body. Of that arm. I didn't want you to see those ugly scars. God, this is so pathetic—"
"Don't say that," you interrupted him. "That's not pathetic. I understand how you feel. That you have so many negative thoughts about yourself. But Bucky… God, I don't know how to properly say it." You paused for a moment, considering the words. "You're one of the most amazing people I know. And even if many people in the tower are scared or intimidated by you, for me, you are the sweetest, most caring, and most generous person. You remember every little thing I say, make me coffee and food when I'm too busy, pretend to like those shitty movies that I make you watch with me. I'm so sorry that so many bad things happened to such a good person that you feel unworthy of good things."
Suddenly, strong arms surrounded you, and you realized that Bucky was hugging you with arms wrapping around your waist. He nuzzled up to your neck, and you could feel light sobs. Gently, you entangled your fingers in his hair, massaging the scalp with calming movements.
"I don't deserve you, doll." Bucky pulled back a little, still keeping his hands on your waist. "I wish I could be normal for you. Be who I was back in the 40s. I would’ve asked you out and given you everything that you deserved. But that person is not here any more, and I'm not worthy of you."
He wanted to ask you out on a date?  Your heart stopped as soon as the words left his mouth, and you stared at Bucky in surprise. "Bucky—"
"I know…fuck—I shouldn't have said that. Fuck, fuck, fuck. I'm sorry, doll. I didn't mean to mess anything up between us, I promise. I know you don't feel the same— it's okay, really. Just forget about—"
You didn't let Bucky finish by leaning forward and brushing your lips against his. His flesh automatically tangled in the hair at the back of your neck as the metal one tightened his grip on your waist. For the first few seconds, Bucky was in shock, not kissing you back, but just as you wanted to pull away, his lips began to move, taking over you immediately.
It was the best kiss you ever had. He was gentle yet so passionate. There were a lot of unsaid feelings that Bucky kept to himself for too long. All thoughts seemed to have left your head as the feeling of him filled your whole body.
When there was not enough air, you moved away from each other, touching your foreheads with your eyes closed.
"Fuck" was the first thing he said.
"Yeah," you laughed, finally meeting Bucky's eyes. He looked at you with such adoration that you felt butterflies in your stomach. You just noticed how much skin-to-skin contact you had. "Are you okay with that? Doesn't that make you uncomfortable?" You tilted your head as your hands squeezed his shoulders.
"That's... that's weird. I'm not used to that kind of contact," Bucky said, studying your face. "But I trust you, doll. You are the only person I trust completely." You felt him begin to gently run his hand along your back. "I'd like to ask you out on a date. I mean, if you want to. If not, I totally understand—"
You interrupted him again, leaving a quick kiss on his lips. "I'd like to go on a date with you, James. You know, you’re so cute when you’re shy?"
You've never seen his face so lit up with happiness, with a little bit of pink on his cheeks. Butterflies began to beat in your stomach again, and you realized that it was you who made him feel that way.
"Do you want to go to bed, put on some shitty comedy, and grab some food? I still have to watch over your injury."
"Sounds like a perfect plan, doll." Bucky kissed you on the forehead, interlacing his fingers with you, and led you to his room.
Even if it still required a lot of work, cuddling with Bucky, you knew it was the best place you could be.
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merlinssassybeard · 1 year ago
Text
'Ex' husband Gojo - You and I
Part 1
Tags- Gojo x fem reader, angst, self depreciation/suicidal stuff, miscarriage centered chapter
Synopsis- a look at both of their POVs, the aftermath a month later.
Satoru is devastated but so are you but worse...
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22nd October, 2016...
22nd October of 2016 was when it happened. The Legal Separation between you and Satoru Gojo.
Fortunately or not but the whole fiasco never went outside the borders of The Gojo Estate, despite it involving a few 'third parties'.
Luckily, the servants of the house were on a week off or else by now you and Satoru would have become the new gossip of the town no doubt.
Mr Ijichi, an assistant director at the Jujutsu High and a very close and trusted accomplice of your husband... or ex husband, you can't decide.
He is probably the only person who knows about it, not in detail of course since Satoru is very specific on who he wants to be close with but yes, you suspect Mr Ijichi is a bit aware of what went down because he was the one driving the car on that day.
You also suspected at first that maybe Ms Shoko is also in light of the events because she is definitely someone who gets her information one way or the other and the fact Satoru might have... no! He has infact told Shoko about all of it.
When Satoru introduced you to the World of Jujutsu Society, Ms Shoko was the first he got you to meet with and since you have had good relationship with her.
Since your legal separation happened, Shoko and Ijichi have been a mediator, set up by Gojo, for communication since, you know it and so does everybody who knows Gojo Satoru, he's too prideful to go back wagging his tail where he's not needed. Or so he thinks.
Satoru thinks because of his work schedules, he is not able to spend time with you as your husband and not able give you the life you hoped for which definitely affected your mental health (as predicted by his six eyes) and thus you decided for a divorce.
But the new information that he got on that day from you made him realize maybe he was indeed wrong thinking that you are perhaps different from other women who only fell for the looks but mostly for the money and the status of the Gojo family in general.
He never had plans to marry in the Jujutsu Society or The human World (haha as if!) be it arranged or love. He did not care. He had plans to become the wise Sage or a Monk of wisdom, a teacher/mentor like in video games. But all of it changed when he met you, a simple average human.
You were the one who taught Satoru so much. You were the one made him realize that even the strongest sorcerer has a soft heart that has the capability of falling in love.
But what made him solidify his love, making him realize that yes he has fallen in love and he is glad it is you was when you (unknowing about his past with the incident with Riko and Toji) made him realize the fact that all humans are not same.
This was the last and final straw that made the fall for you really bad and sick. He wanted to marry you. But he never said it out loud because of the repercussions you would have to go through and that is why he protested as well when you brought up the topic of marriage.
But none of it matters
None of it
Not anymore
He is done
All humans are the same.
Greed
Lust
Money
Fame
Power
All humans are indeed the same...
Satoru has no interest in any sort of relationships anymore. Everything feels sour and bitter. All he knows now is his role. His role as the strongest sorcerer, a responsible mentor, as the Head of his Clan, Face of the Jujutsu Society altogether. These are his priorities.
Gojo would very much prefer a permanent sort of freedom from you now knowing your true face.
'Ugh awful, so disgusting. A whore? Really? Is that all you thought of yourself y/n when you voluntarily got physical with me before marriage?', he said to himself in his head.
The only reason Gojo sent Separation papers instead of divorce was because it would startle both of yours and his families. The society isn't kind to divorced women and that too the ex wife of the six eyes sorcerer. Oh what a wonderful way to make him vulnerable for the curses and curse users!
He can say whatever he want against you but somewhere, inside that beautiful big and kind heart of his, he wants to talk to you, talk things out, talk about your feelings and wants to listen. But his mind refuses to let down his walls, ever gain!
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Days following the 22nd October, you mostly stayed locked up in your room while Mr Ijichi packed all of your husband's clothing and accessories.
Mr Ijichi isn't stupid, he knew it must be really hard for you that is why he tried his best to enter, collect the things and exit as quietly as he could.
'A whore? Why did you even say that you bitch. You really don't deserve ANYTHING in this world!', your days began with endless self loathing.
5th December, 2016
A lot happened in the month following the incident.
Most of your days were spent in self loathing because after your miscarriage at just 3 months, the doctor had declared that you're (uterus) not strong enough to carry a child.
These words are something a woman is most scared to ever hear in her life. And you were one of the unfortunates.
You had stopped taking your post miscarriage medications. You're mental health got worse as well due to continuous thoughts on how you acted up on impulses and ruined the only good thing you had. Days followed you couldn't even get the strength to get up from the bed every morning. Fading appetite lead to refusing food which further resulted to visible sunken cheeks.
The house staff didn't knew anything that took place during their week off and they had noticed changes around the household. From your behavior to the absence of the Head of the house. They were also worried for your health and didn't knew what to do.
The head of staff, Mr Kawaguchi, decided to make a call to the Master of the house since it is normal for him to be absent from the house due to his work.
Kawaguchi- Good morning Satoru sama. This is Kawaguchi from the house.
Gojo (a little annoyed)- I'm busy, call me later.
Kawaguchi- Sir actually there's a grave problem at the house.
Gojo (mockingly)- what? Did someone die or something? This better be important-
Kawaguchi- sir its Y/n sama. Y/n sama is not in good health.
Gojo (worried)- w- what?! What're you stupids doing? What happened to y/n? Is she okay? What did the doctors say?
Kawaguchi- uh about that sir... y/n sama didn't let us into her room and actually we had to... (nervously looks back at the the other staff, everyone nods)
Gojo- huh?
Kawaguchi- sir, we had to break into y/n sama's room. We have called the doctors and they'll-
Gojo- break into the room!? What is hap- Nevermind, I'm sending someone. You lot stay there and look after y/n till the docs arrive!
Kawaguchi- y- yes sir!
Gojo was now left worried at what the hell did he just hear on the call. 'What are you upto now y/n'. Is this some trick to bring him back out of pity and pretend nothing happened? That you, a month ago, didn't just randomly demand for a Divorce.
He was really annoyed and even if he wanted to go to the house he couldn't due to being out abroad for missions. He has been busy with overseas missions mostly after the separation.
He decided to send Shoko for a look and to inform him 'EVERY SINGLE DETAIL', verbatim.
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Shoko was sitting at the morgue, smoking, when she received a call from Gojo.
'Ha? Gojo? At this hour?', she wondered.
"Yea?", Shoko said with her usual nonchalant voice.
"I need a favor"
Gojo explained her the situation to which she agreed without hesitant, knowing what has been going on between you two and now this.
When she arrived at the Gojo Estate, she was welcomed by the worried faces of the staff that guided her to your room.
She started observing every detail. She saw the entrance door, broken. The inside of the master bedroom, dim, even with long sliding doors facing the beautiful and bright gardens. There were half eaten bowls of food. A trolley with clothes overflowing.
Shoko turned to looked at you and felt her heart wrench a little at the sight of you. She was horrified and worried. She is usually a very calm and relaxed person but you, you really made her loose her calm.
She knows you and has seen you in your good days. In light yellow summer dress beside Gojo, all smiles to now? Like this. Dark circles umder eyes and slight sunken cheeks, chipped lips and several medications.... wait what medications?
There were already a doctor present in the room who declared that its just dehydration and that it'll be okay with a few medicines.
The servants thanked the doctor and ordered the medicines.
Meanwhile, Shoko was already in a shock. The medicines piled up beside you on the bed and the bedside table were... post miscarriage pills. She enquired the whole situation from the staff.
All while, the two women staff got you up in the bed and gave you water.
Eyes half open, you recognised what was happening. You passed out of dehydration and couldn't hear the knocks of the servants outside for breakfast. They were worried and tried the other doors, through the garden, but they were locked. So they broke the entrance and found still in the bed with pills surrounding you. They all got worried and one called the doctor and the head called Gojo.
Shoko noticed you were up and ordered the ladies to open the curtains and windows and leave her for a while. Afterall she's got some questioning to do in Gojo's behalf.
She extended her hand to hold your left hand. It seemed cold to touch. "Hello y/n. Remember me?"
You struggled to open your eyes and look.
"Don't worry i won't ask you how you're doing", she joked.
"But i will ask about the medications y/n. Do not lie. I'm a doctor too", Shoko knew now is not the time but she also knew that if you were pregnant then why didn't you tell Gojo because he obviously didn't know.
Your ears started ringing. And eyes welled up. You were reminded of it again. You wanted to just lay back down and bury yourself in the warmth of the blankets.
But the cat was out of the bag. Shoko is a doctor. She knows medicines. You cannot lie. You cannot hide. You have to be strong, you have to show her that everything is okay and Satoru needn't be worried, not like as if he is anyway.
"Please.", you mumbled, she had leaned in and caressed your knuckles. "Shoko, do not let anyone know of this, i beg of you."
"Shhh", she shushed you, "Don't say that. I won't. I promise"
She continued, "... but what about Satoru? You can't hide it from him. The child was his as much as it was yours-"
You cut her in, "Shoko i wanted to tell him! I wanted him and only HIM to be the first to get the news of the...", you struggled but continued, "...of the pregnancy. I got to know myself in the 2nd month and he was coming back home just next month, it was all perfectly going... until it wasn't".
Shoko was visibly upset. She didn't knew what to say. All she was aware of was the things Gojo told her...
He went home with gifts and souvenirs for you, you gave him divorce papers, he tried convince you not to, you weren't ready to listen, you said some hurtful things, he realised his place and agreed for separation over divorce.
Looking at you she can tell you would breakdown any moment.
And she was right.
You did.
You broke down in tears.
Hyperventilating you mumbled, "Shoko they said i can't have children! Can you believe that! I can't have kids! And I'm so stupid i brought out a f-fucking Divorce paper when Satoru came home."
"He was so angry with me i could feel it even if he wasn't! I'm stuck Shoko! I-i just - just want to go hide under a rock or maybe i should just kill mys-"
Shoko pulled you in for a hug. "Ah! Thats enough. That's enough. Shush now. Its okay."
"I won't tell Satoru, don't worry"
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Series masterlist
Tags:
@autumn-slaves @wondermilka @hh0pe @chayunwoo @Enaaneaen @sweet-almonds @sindela @dazai-gojo-kinnie @whats-humanity-lol @thewickedofrizz @phantasmia @ghostllyyz @yihona-san06 @aesonsgirl @direwolf-5 @fairyyxsp @puroganggang @altyx @dianagracesworld @hermitkerm @leonesimp @minnerra @whitelittlebunny @letharue
2K notes · View notes
angelheony · 5 months ago
Text
'Make it stop, please make them stop!'
✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶ Synopsis ✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶
You used to think that you were good at hiding your emotions beneath the surface. Well simply because the hints you've been throwing at this someone you like have been getting ignored. On purpose or just his obliviousness? You have never told a soul about your affections, which hurt a couple of your crackhead friends, but in their defense, it was quite obvious to the naked eye what you both have been stressing over.
You were also quite sensitive to the other's feelings for you (said by them) and it hurts your friends' eyes to see the both of you pinning on each other but were clouded by self-doubt and overthinking.
So cue Wei Wuxian and Nie Huaisang scheming to get you to confess to each other.
Pairing: Jiang Cheng x gn! Reader
Content- Fluff, crack, idiots in love, straight up chaotic writing srry srry this author is tired
wc: Approximately 3k+ words
Warnings: Bad grammar, might be ooc, spelling mistakes
More Author's notes at the bottom
┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊
┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ˚★⋆。˚ ⋆
┊ ┊ ┊ ⋆
┊ ┊ ★⋆
┊ ◦
★⋆ ┊ . ˚
˚★
Your head hurts when thinking about how the hell you got stuck here, in a small room, in a haunted house (or what Huaisang claims it to be). With the person you admit to being in love with.
Jiang Wanyin.
You sit with your back leaning on the wall, not making eye contact with the equally flustered man in front of you. Covering his face with his hand, trying to conceal the effect that the situation has on him. Not so slick really, but who are you to say that? when you are as stunned to be here as he is.
✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶ ✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶
It's now lunchtime in the Cloud Recesses, fluttering white robes pool at the entrance of the dining halls. Only just having finished their tasks and some lectures.
The light pitter-patter from the soles of their shoes can be heard and a few whispers thrown in secrecy. Disciples, afraid to be punished by the elders in the vicinity.
You keep your eyes open for a set of black and purple robes sitting, so you can grace them with your presence.
And there they are, seated on the near edge of the room. Odd why would they pick that place specifically? Unless we're in for knack of trouble again. You sigh out whilst striding towards them.
Wei Wuxian's eyes show a glimmer of mischievousness as he says albeit a little loudly,
"Well if it isn't our favorite person in the world, Aish so tardy what's got you so late? Jiang Cheng here was quite worried-"
A snicker can be heard from the person beside him, Huaisang. Which earns them both a smack in the head by the purple clad man.
You smile whilst sitting beside him, seeing it's the only space left. As both of the trouble makers are facing you.
"And you both didn't ouch, well at least someone did.."
You tease back only lightly, nudging the shoulder of your seatmate. Earning a flustered glare from him.
"Stop with your games." Jiang Cheng says firmly, Handing you a bowl of soup and utensils.
You give a sheepish smile in defeat to not piss him off further, "Okay, okay I'll stop. Thanks for leaving some for me, you're the best A-cheng"
You grab the soup in his hands, fingers touching for a brief second. Though it was enough to render you breathless, you hide it with a cocky demeanor.
✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶On the other side of the table✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶
"Do they think they're so slick with it....? I swear they're oblivious..." Wei Wuxian rolls his eyes at the pair in front of them as he whispers to his partner in crime.
"How do they not notice at all, it's stressing me out"
Huaisang nods fervently, fanning himself dramatically faster.
"Ugh, when can we make this stop...It hurts my soul just looking at them" Wei Wuxian groans, looking exasperated enough as it is. After all, he just finished copying a lot of the Lan clan's rules as a punishment.
"Well then let's hurry up with the plan," Huaisang, says menacingly, Betraying his always jittery demeanor. As they both snicker at the plan he concocted just a few nights ago.
✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶
"What are you both scheming again?" You say with raised eyebrows and a small smile. Curious about what adventures await from the both of them.
"Guys, you know I think you're the coolest and strongest people here-"
A scoff can be heard beside you, making you crack a grin.
"Just spill it out, what is it?" Jiang Cheng says with impatience.
"Ugh... Can you please, please come with me? I want to explore that abandoned house just on the outskirts of town!"
Huaisang whispers-shouts, with his hands clasped together pleadingly.
You nod, willing to go on an adventure as well. As place bores you to death, all of you sharing the look of agreement.
"I'm in, when will we do this little escapade of ours?"
"In a few days time, Qiren says that we have a test coming up and you know I can't fail, my brother will kill me now for real..."
Huaisang panics, before excusing himself in the library pavilion to study. Just now remembering it.
Wei Wuxian slumps on his chair, defeat evident in his face.
Guessing he'll have to endure a couple of days of this pure torture. "No A-sang come back, Why not now..."
"Go annoy your favorite Lan brother if you are so adamant about causing some trouble right now," Jiang Cheng says sarcastically,
"Ah, nice idea A-cheng.." His eyes light up 'Better than staying with you cowards!'
He saunters off with a grin, excited for some amusement.
"tch, that guy..." He says in disbelief, he wasn't even being serious about that.
"Wei Wuxian being Wei Wuxian, just let him be it makes him happy," You say in a soft tone. Wishing to have that carefree personality in life, your eyes following him.
"He enjoys being punished so much?", he sighs crossing his arms on his chest with a solemn expression "Hopefully he won't bite on something more than he can chew in the future with his antics"
You could only smile, gaze falling on him. He's such a worrywart for the people he cares about. Just odd at showing it.
You both sit there for a while enjoying the peace, after going through your separate tasks much to your dismay.
✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶
Now you are here in front of a shabby and abandoned looking house with your peers,
"That was close, Hangguang-Jun almost caught us"
Huaisang said clutching his fan with relief.
"Thank god we have Wei Wuxian here with us, Lan Wanji recoils at the sight of you."
Jiang Cheng grins out, patting Wei Wuxian on the back. Much to the black and red clad man's dismay.
"Hey, I would say that we have become good friends already!"
"Mhm, ask the ghosts in here if they want to be friends with you too. So we can have a safe passage"
You join in on the teasing, moving to the door. Wanting to get on with the exploring already, Huaisang follows suit with a smile.
"Why am I friends with you guys again?" He pouts dramatically, a rhetorical question that you don't bother to answer.
You all look into the house, debating on who should go first,
"Aish just go in and stop your sulking"
You ruffle his hair, at the same time pushing him in first.
"Cowards" He mutters under his breath yet walks in anyway,
The light from the sun outside dims as you all move in deeper. A chill permeated in the air.
Huaisang is far behind the group, clutching onto your robes
"It's so dark someone make a palm tor-"
The sound of something heavy falling cuts you off, Readying your sword in hand.
"What the hell was that mhmp-"
The sound of Jiang Cheng getting muffled out by something worries you, making you call out to him loudly.
"Wei Wuxian? Where is he?" You ask him but there's no response, not knowing where they're both gone you were about to light a palm torch-
Getting cut off again by Huaisang's shrill screech behind you,
"Ah, there's a ghost help me, help me!"
He jumps onto your back, almost outbalancing you,
"Huaisang- I'm trying, get off! How can I fight with you on top of me!-"
He moves around sporadically making you stumble around, dropping your sword,
"Gah A-sang I can't see- ugh get off. You're choking me-"
You struggle under his struggling, for someone who doesn't train as much, Huaisang can get pretty strong when scared.
You get dragged by another person by your wrist, and though it doesn't feel like a monster you still can't help but try to struggle in their hold. Your friends, Like they're both two different people, not listening to your pleas and shouts.
You hear some screams and banging from a door.
It sounds like Jiang Cheng- thank god he's all right,
A door creaks open as you get pushed quite harshly into wherever your sight is is a blur.
You brace yourself for a harsh fall, eyes clenched shut,
Only to be met with a firm wall-? You didn't get hurt as it broke your fall
Arm snake their way to your side to stabilize you.
You stiffen, maybe it's one of your abductors. Almost giving them a harsh slap but thankfully you stop yourself in time to see a familiar face.
"A-cheng..."
You sigh in relief, almost falling back onto his chest with your gladness...
His chest-? You freeze in your place in disbelief,
Meeting his flushed gaze, he mutters 'Are you okay?'
You quickly fall back, face flushing with color as well,
"Sorry- sorry I didn't mean to do that you see people pushed me in here-"
You stutter out, pointing to the already closed door. This looks so bad.
"Where are the others?" You ask flatly, finally catching your breath and calming down.
"They're the ones that pushed us here." He says darkly, pissed at their intentions.
"But why?..."
"Hey, are you all okay there?" A voice resounds from the other side of the door, It's all sickeningly happy and sing-songy, Must be Wei Wuxian.
"Wei Wuxian! Cease your jokes, Let us out!" Jiang Cheng exclaims, standing up to continue his banging on the door before you rudely interrupted.
"No, You both have been insufferable!"
"Isn't that supposed to be your job? Why are we the insufferable ones now," You nip back in confusion,
"Huaisang- let us out, stop following that idiot's schemes..."
Moving to the door as well, You say softly. Hoping to get his mercy.
"Hmm, sorry then all my planning would go to waste..."
He says leisurely, "Don't worry, this will all be for the very good of all of us. So you'll still owe me another escort after this!"
You could envision him saying that with a smile, you really won't trust him after this that's for sure.
"I will break both of your legs off when I find a way out of here" He stops his banging, looking for more plausible exits in this small room.
"Hmm there's nothing you could do to get out A-cheng, all you both have to do is confess your hidden feelings to each other so we all can be done with this bother!"
Wei Wuxian explains like it's so easy to do and after this, we can go back like nothing happened,
"Hidden feelings, stupid. what are you talking about?"
Jiang Cheng chokes out, which kind of hurts. expecting something different, but it is, Jiang Cheng.
"Oh come on guys, stop ignoring it. You both are always so close and so sweet to each other..."
"Those love sick gazes too eurgh..." What a hypocrite, When he unknowingly does that to the younger Lan brother too.
Your gazes meet, both clouded with worry and embarrassment.
" This is some sick joke, just let us out.."
"No, you sort out your stuff, we're gonna explore the rest of the place now-"
"Wuxian seriously?... That seems like a bad idea, what if there are fierce ghosts around here? Were incomplete!"
"Well they're locked in there, you wanna stay outside where no one can protect you? Just come with me and have some trust" Wei Wuxian says cockily. The sound of walking echoes only but faintly now.
"Okay, Okay wait! Don't leave me please!"
"Plus give them some time, they'll be busy eating each other's faces or doing something even more interesting in there like some papap-"
"Wei Ying!" You both say in unison almost harmonizing, which earns a laugh from the shameless idiots outside.
Jiang Cheng spurs insult to insult in embarrassment
And you just freeze there, muttering some curses to them outside.
✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶
You sit with your back leaning on the wall, not making eye contact with the equally flustered man in front of you.
Hopes shattered after seeing that there were no plausible exits in this small room, and the stupid door seemed to be blocked and locked on the outside.
You can't burn this house down with a palm torch or do full-powered attacks. Simply because the space in here is ridiculous, it might hurt the other one due to proximity.
Seriously, every movement you do has your shoulders touching it may have been nice when outside, but this predicament has your thoughts tangled now.
"Sorry I don't know what they're playing at, listen they'll get tired of this charade soon and let us out"
"Is it true? do you like me too?" You ask with a glint of hope, retracing back to your conversation with your friends outside.
"I-I don't know what they're saying, I would never?..."
He says almost confused himself, trying to deny it but also not. Unable to make up his mind.
Pride or heart? which will he choose, as he is still going back and forth, one thing is sure to you.
"Ah is that so..? Cause I like you" Having lowered your pride and fear, you say it.
Your gaze falls on his widened eyes. It's like hearing a pin drop, silence envelopes the barely lit room. You could only inhale sharply, this is the ruination of the bond that took years to build.
The strings tugging on your heart, are too hard to bear. Almost pulling it apart slowly but surely. You could only close your eyes in hopelessness
Slow paced walking can only be heard, going towards you.
"I'm sorry A-cheng, I'll stay away from you after this if it bothers you-"
You got cut off by a sudden bone-breaking hug, "Don't say sorry, I like you too." He mutters out softly, vulnerability laced in his words. Like finally letting go of this facade that you raise to never be looked down upon. This burden of a secret getting carried for years finally being able to let go.
"No- not don't say that. Don't say that because you pity me, it's weird"
You try to pull him off you, disbelief clouding your mind.
"it was such a long time ago. I was a coward, I didn't think you would love someone like me...I'm a joke, I'm harsh, I don't know how to express anything-" He blurts out a wave of self-doubt, which you aren't having.
"No don't say any of those, the right question is who wouldn't fall in love with you..."
You lean his head closer into your embrace, finally choosing to embrace the facts. No use in denying it anymore.
"I know you care, somewhere deep in your heart. I understand, forever will."
"You must be crazy," He mutters out shakily, intertwining his fingers in yours.
"I must be. So stop denying my feelings. Or I'll go even crazier" You hold his hands, tightly not wanting to let go at this moment.
You stay in each other's hold for the time being, embracing the tranquility and letting this sink in. Embedding this moment deep within your chests.
✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶
A few minutes have passed, and you still aren't out. You don't mind though, enjoying some peace.
"Seriously, I can't believe this is the place where we confess to each other" You cover your face trying to stifle your oncoming laughter, finding it too amusing. "Imagined it would be in some romantic place, amidst blooming lotuses, or in the rain all that poetic stuff"
"It would have been thanks to those idiots outside, where even are they? It's getting hot in here" He hisses out, complaining about the heat yet makes no move on detaching himself from you to cool off.
"Oh, it is?" You say with a mischievous tone, implying something as a joke. "Don't mind if I take a few covers off us, so we can cool off- and you know."
A sharp sting from your ear cuts you off, letting out a groan in response.
"You- I didn't mean that, What is wrong with all of you!-"
Jiang Cheng pulls on your ear with an embarrassed expression, not so slickly covering his face with his free hand.
"Oh you didn't mean that whoopsie!- ah okay okay sorry stop"
Clasping your hands on his, you try to pry his grip from your ear. god if Huaisang has some strength released by fear then this guy has some when embarrassed,
He let out a 'hmph' before letting go and sulking away from a distance.
"Ah don't be mad I was joking please?" You try to look as pitiful as ever, crawling into his embrace. Trying to hug him before a scream interrupted your wooing.
"Ah! Help There really are some ghosts here!" A shrill and loud scream can be heard echoing outside the halls
You roll your eyes, not caring if that's real or just an act again
Only leaning into your 'lover's' chest now.
"So this makes us official now right?" You poke Jiang Cheng's cheek. Checking if he's still mad, wanting an answer now.
"If you want to be? yeah." He mumbles out too quickly, breaking his mad facade for a while. Still trying to keep that calm and not affected act.
"You're adorable you know that right?" You point out his not-so-slick act right now,
Pinching his cheeks and admiring the flush in his expression.
"No I'm not your being ridiculous-!" He tries to pry away from your grip, feeling all too bashful as of now.
"Oh yeah fine, coolest most amazing, strongest-" You turn in a different direction, though still teasing.
"If you don't shut up! I'll make you" Jiang Cheng says albeit unsure of his threat, still has conviction in his eyes.
"Hmm, how so? I'm curious" tilting your head to the side, curious.
"I'll kiss you..." A meek whisper, barely able to be caught by your ear
"You'll what?" You exhale shakily, really amused now at his not so intimidating remark
Unsure to even call that a threat, who's he threatening you or himself?
" You all can burn in he- " He gives up, only squirming to get out of your vicinity
" You know you're really in no place to threaten, but I'll just give it to you" You exhale a laugh,
before leaning in quickly, not bothering to warn him. What you said was plenty enough as your lips intertwined in a clumsy kiss.
Running can be heard from outside the halls, with some matching breathless screams. It's Huaisang,
"Guys guys please help there's a ghost! Please don't be mad at me anymore, I'll do anything just help me-"
Loud thuds and scrapes on the floor, like furniture dragging can be heard. You could only smile in your shared kiss not minding the chaos outside one bit.
Jiang Cheng was shocked at your sudden initiation at first, frozen. Yet after some time, he kisses back clumsily, eyes closing in embarrassment,
As the door finally swings open, Huaisang stumbles in quickly. tripping un-ironically before closing the door, leaning his back on it as he takes some time to catch his breath.
His relief turns into disbelief as he rethinks his decision to come in here, seeing your quite intimate moment. Or if it would be better if he stayed outside.
Covering his eyes, he could only plead for it all to be over soon.
"Sorry for interrupting guys... but I'm here.. hi, hello... Can you please help us.." He says mortified by what he barged into.
"Huaisang help! make them come out here hurry!-" Another loud voice can be heard outside. Seems like he's in a bit of a pickle, eh whatever.
"As you can see we're in a bit of trouble-"
"So what?" "get lost," You both say in unison, stopping your entanglement just to be petty.
Huaisang could only whine with his hands clasped, as he flinches at the loud noises of destruction coming from outside. Pitying his friend amidst the trouble he's fighting alone.
"Find somewhere else to hide and maybe I'll reconsider, after a while," You say not wanting to let go soon of this fondness circulating in this tiny room.
"But where?-" He cries out, though accepting his doom with a cry as you continue where you left off.
Bolting out of the door in a panic,
✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶
Bells echo around the cloud recesses, signaling the time of rest and the end of the day.
Not for both of the black-clad individuals, One with the gold accents dragging a tied-up one.
To be fair getting caught and being a distraction is better than getting mauled by a ghost to death.
Patrolling Lan clan disciples halt them in their tracks near the entrance, a knack of punishment awaits them for breaking a few rules of staying away past curfew.
A light revenge really, concocted by yours truly. A bargain in exchange for saving them against that fierce ghost.
After all, they’re the reason for your blooming bond right now, and your safe passage entering the recesses as the attention of the patrollers is now in the eyes of our geniuses. Rightly so with their brilliant plan.
✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆✶
Did I get too carried away when making this? Yes. 3k words, you know it's bad when your notes app gets maxed out.
I was really tired when finishing this, might not be in character, but let's just imagine since this is just my self indulgent fic (all of them are)
Will probs delete the whole thing or just a few scenes after I get some well needed sleep, and fix some mistakes
byebye I will be passing out and hope you enjoyed your reading somehow.
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ironunderstands · 5 months ago
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Not a question, just very happy it's not just me loving IP3 (or trans Ratio for that matter). Yap away on both
Ugh I love them both so much
Most of my headcanons are when I find something to be better and/or more interesting than it is in canon, or something that’s a great extension of canon, and that’s exactly what trans Ratio is to me.
It takes his already present insecurities and squares them, as now the doctor has to contend with not just being a SMART enough man, but being a smart enough MAN, and adding that extra layer of misery and complexity is just so delightful.
By taking a character racked by self doubt and adding another layer to it, like Ratio being trans, you complicate his current insecurities and give new perspectives to look at them from.
Like in canon Ratio exercises so much because he wants to be the most perfect, best version of himself and has been doing it since a very young age (middle school).
But then you add him being trans to that, and suddenly he’s not just combating being perceived as not good enough, he’s combating being perceived entirely, attempting to try and get others to view him the way he really is, and attempting to live up to whatever masculine ideal that would push away his dysphoria, something prominent within his life from a young age.
I’ve kinda dived into this within my fics about it, but I like the idea that Ratio keeps this a secret from everyone- and I mean everyone. He already doesn’t live up to his own expectations of himself, so to have the rest of the galaxy find out that he doesn’t live up to their expectations of him either (ie being a cis man I mean you cannot tell me there aren’t like hundreds of people in universe begging for his uh- yeah), it would crush him.
I mean considering how guarded he is already, adding another thing to hide behind that alabaster mask would be fun, even if I think Ratio is likely at least a decade post-op + post-transition, so it’s not like he has to bind or anything, but the threat is still there. Especially considering his well known love of baths- imagine if he avoided the public baths at his home planet (considering how heavily Greek/Roman inspired Ratio is), and how that might affected him growing up, or just the tendency of shirtlessness in general.
There’s just a lot of possibilities and intricacies to it that makes me really like this particular headcanon, and it will always be canon in my heart haha. I have some more silly things behind it, like me wanting to give Aventio and Ratiopaz biological kids because it would be cute, or just the inherent joy of the big buff guy actually being the trans one rather than who you would expect it to be/who it’s stereotypically made as- Aventurine, as I like when characters have traits you don’t expect them to possess.
I also tend to dislike Aventurine being made ftm because he’s implied to be an SA survivor and rep for amab victims is already kinda abysmal so I don’t like taking it away, also I just think it’s boring tbh, at least for me it just doesn’t interest me.
Trans Topaz is a whole other discussion, personally I think she’s mtnb, and more femme presenting (I’d make her use she/they in my fics it’s just pronoun swapping when writing polyamory is miserable and anybody who’s ever written it can attest to that 😭, it’s there in spirit I promise!)
I honestly don’t have deep reasons behind this one, it’s just pure vibes. Someone was like, “Topaz gives nonbinary” once on here and I’m like yeah, yeah she does 😭. She reminds me of Childe a lot and I also view him as nonbinary so she’s kinda in a similar boat.
I think she’s very motherly but like in the way Mother Nature is if that makes sense? Mother is mothering but she’s also a creature tm* and certified tax collecting humanity loving entity. Also I have a close friend who’s a trans woman and Topaz reminds me of her so like, bam ur trans now lol (hi Alice if ur seeing this).
As for Aventiopaz, I fear I’d need a whole other post dedicated to why I like them. You guys know why I like Aventio, Avenpaz also require a whole other yap session, and Ratiopaz is the best rarepair ever fight me. Generally I like it because it’s really sweet, the dynamic is hilarious, they are the power trio of all time, they have great gameplay synergy, and their designs complement each other a lot- being primary colors and all.
I also enjoy their individual unique relationships to the IPC and how that might affect their interactions with one another, both in canon and in my brain. Moreover the trio of coworkers who are well known around the office for a) getting the job done and b) being absolutely obnoxious around one another (in a good way) is incredibly fun and I enjoy the idea of all the shenanigans they would get up to.
Perhaps my next Aventiopaz fic would be them going on a mission together or something, as I definitely want to write another one, and also update my slideshow of the parents au, I’ve just been so busy and a bit unmotivated 😭 so hopefully I can get to that soon
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maycatsblog · 3 months ago
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A Loyal Customer and A Total Noob Employee.
Suguru Geto x fem Reader
Notes: Both characters are adults. Reader has self-harm scars. Slight Stalking, yandere tendencies, kidnapping.
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Geto sighed, tired from the work the week had brought. Geto stopped in front of a coffee shop, which was a personal favorite of his. He loved the coffee they made and the baked goods. Geto walked through the doors, knowing what he'd be ordering.
He went up to the counter to order, and the person who was there was someone Geto didn't recognize. A new employee. "Can I just have three brownies and hot coffee? Thanks." He looked at her name badge, trying to see what her name was. The writing was messy, as if written in a hurry. Y/n.
Y/n moved quickly behind the counter, getting the brownies and hot coffee ready to go. Y/n walked back to the front with the ordered food. "Uh, here's the food you ordered." Y/n looked at the register nervously, putting in the items so that it could be paid. "That'll be.. $6.70.." Y/n mumbled. Geto paid the price, and Y/n held out the brownies and hot coffee out for him.
Geto took the brownies and hot coffee but not without noticing scars on Y/n's arms. He stayed silent but took a mental note. When Geto left, she sighed, relaxing. This was Y/n's first job. Y/n rubbed her arms, nervous from the work day. She sighed, a bit tired from the day. For the rest of the day, Y/n felt anxious. It felt like someone had their eyes on her.
For the next few weeks, Geto came into the coffee shop on days that he knew Y/n would be working. He started to chat with her, eventually beginning a friendship between them. Geto and Y/n enjoyed each other company, looking forward to the days they'd see each other. One day, when Geto came in, he noticed that Y/n had a few bandages on her arms and face.
Y/n noticed Geto, smiling warmly. "Hi, again, Geto." He noticed that she didn't seem to be bothered by her bandages. Geto smiled back at her, "Nice to see you as well, Y/n. What happened to cause the bandages?" Y/n looked at her bandages for a few seconds before saying, "It was just a bad accident. I didn't want to miss work, so I just bandaged myself up. I'm okay, though." She gave a thumbs up in response to her claim.
Geto nodded, pretending to believe Y/n. Geto doubted her story. Maybe Y/n was actually being abused by someone, and she was too scared to speak out about it. Or did she harm herself? Other ideas raced through his mind. Geto looked at his phone, pretending something came. "Oh, oops. Looks like i won't have to order something. Got to go. See you next time, Y/n."
Y/n waved bye as Geto left the shop. He went into an alley, and the thoughts Geto had been refusing to think about spilled. The thoughts asked why Geto liked this non sorcerer. Cared and worried about her. Under his breath, Geto whispered to himself ," If she's in my sight all the time, I won't have to worry Y/n."
The next day, Y/n smiled up at the ceiling. When Y/n started this job, she was nervous most of the time. But then Geto started to come by when she was on shift. They became friends, and Y/n had started to be less nervous over time. Y/n thought about what might be a nice gratitude gift for Geto. She pondered about what, until she heard the door open. Y/n looked to see who it was, seeing Geto. He looked tired but was resolved to do something. Y/n started to walk over to him but felt dizzy. "Ugh..." She looked up at Geto. He looked out of focus. Strange creatures looked to be around him. A second later, Y/n lost consciousness.
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wildissylupus · 5 months ago
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Can we get some OW New Blood headcanons? Whether it be some type of angst, heartfelt, or lighthearted interactions between the group.
Ask and you shall receive!! It's been awhile since I've done some New Blood stuff so let's see what I can do. Let's start off with some head canons first.
The New Bloods are the biggest human help in getting Zarya to unlearn her prejudices against omnics, it's mostly by telling her their own experiences with the Crisis (and with Hana it's her experiences with the Gwishi). They also call her out if she does or says something in line with her prejudice.
Cassidy is giving them all stealth training cause holy shit he cannot be the only person on that team who knows how to stealth, Baptiste is close but Cassidy knows that Talon stealth training is not going to cut it.
On top of that Cassidy is also giving specific training to D.Va so if she has to fight outside of her Mech he knows he can handle herself.
All of them know about Pharah's crush on Angela, either being told by Pharah herself or from Cassidy complaining that Genji and Pharah are hopeless at romance (he's been dealing with this for a max of 14 years at this point, he's allowed to complain)
They are all in agreement that if they are on a mission in a Talon base, they need to steal as much equipment as possible, mainly focusing on medical supplies.
They all make strategies on how to best use their skills together. They also sometimes include other agents abilities as well.
Pharah is the least foul mouthed of the group, only really swearing outside of missions, the rest? Not so much. By far the people who swear most often are Cassidy and D.Va.
----------------------- Cassidy: So I hear you you and Angie where around each other a lot while she was in Cairo, anything happened? Pharah: We just... hang out, spent time together, nothing other then what we would usually do before. Cassidy: ....Fareeha it's been fourteen years, for the love of god please make a move that isn't just flirty banter. ----------------------- Zarya: I don't understand how you have so many fans. Why do people like to watch you play games that they can play themselves? D.Va: The same reason why people play the Olympics and other sports, cause they like to see other doing something they love! ----------------------- D.Va: Ok so what if I initiate Self Destruct and you shoot them when they get behind cover! That way no matter what we're still hitting them. Cassidy: I don't know, might be able to hit some of them but I doubt it would be worth riskin' the Mech. D.Va: Oh, OH! What about if Niran launches you into the air and you shoot them from above! Cassidy: Hey...That ain't half bad! ----------------------- Baptiste: You know, you should really get some rest, it's not good to overwork yourself. Pharah: Have you been talking with my mum? Cause if she did you should tell her to take her own advise. Baptiste: No, no, I noticed it myself. Though I do think it's funny that both Ana and Cole seem to have the same issue as you. Pharah: Well, it kinda runs if the family. ----------------------- Pharah: Hey Cole, did I tell you that Jean thought we were dating? Cassidy: Ew, what?! What made you think that?! Baptiste: You two just seemed to have a lot of history! I was curious! Pharah: Yeah, it was our history that made you curious, nothing else more personal. Baptiste: Fareeha, I swear to god- ----------------------- Pharah: You know, you and Brigitte remind me of Cole and Angela when they were younger. D.Va: Ugh, Cass said the same thing, but I know I'm way cooler then he is! Pharah: HA! He would have said the same but trust me, it's a compliment.
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salemcantupdate · 1 year ago
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Ok
Baldurs Gate shipping and who I am actively in love with
SO, currently romancing Gale because Astarion rejected me, full one said “I don’t wanna have sex with you, UGH, EW, imagine.” But Gale is so cute??? I don’t get whenever I see hate for him, especially cause we had astral projection sex which was absolutely fantastic. Wyll kissed me but I said “haha nah Gale” and I think I accidentally romanced Karlach??? I don’t know. Oh I also hugged the Guardian love him.
Now for shipping
SHADOWHEART AND LAE’ZEL IS SO FUCKING REAL TO ME OH MY GOD THEY GOTTA GET DOWN RIGHT NOW
They ARE rivals to lovers
Wyll and Karlach… they’re best friends. I’m sorry but all the women look like absolutely lesbians to me and I love that for them
But Wyll is so sweet and so cute and I do adore him, he’s so fun, but I built him so badly haha. Anyways, he is a WHORE, he flirts with EVERYONE, SLUT BOY, and he needs a happy ending. Don’t know with who though. And Karlach needs a short woman to peg.
Astarion is 100% asexual and I love him cause he’s just like me frfr which means he needs to be with me and only me. But also genuinely I think Astarion can only be happy with a redeemed Durge??? Like I think that’s the best path for him. Two monsters learning to be good together… GAH ITS SO CUTE. Either way, he’d need to be with someone who isn’t overly horny
Also once again I absolutely adore Gale. Gale is so good and so loving and he also absolutely loves body worship like he is hozier he was on his knees and worshipping his Goddess Mystra, loving her and now HE CHOOSES YOU IN HIS ROMANCE. HE BDKDCJKWHCISJDKWJD. I love him, so who should he be with? He’s more on the basic side overall, easy to get approval from, but also extremely romantic and loving, and autistic just like me frfr. So… actually maybe Wyll??? Wyll has some self worth issues especially after going all devil and Wyll is also a romantic? But ehhh… I dunno, it just doesn’t feel right.
Anyways, Halsin. I love the daddy bear man like YES he is absolutely fantastic and I love him so so so so much I want him carnally. But also I can’t really see him with most people haha. Maybe Gale though, imagine the astral projection scene but then Halsin is a bear, that’d be hilarious. But nah, I honestly like Halsin/Astarion/Reformed Durge Throuple. Essentially, finishing Astarion’s personal quest before initiation with Halsin will ensure that Astarion doesn’t get any self doubt. They are all on different parts of their journey for improvement, both Halsin and Astarion have severe issues with self doubt along with sexual trauma, and all of them have a “beast” inside. Durge with the Urge, Astarion being a vampire, and Halsin with his difficult-to-control wild shape. Plus Halsin to me is one of the most respectful and consent-focused characters, which I think would work well with what Astarion needs.
Ok so I wanna ship Karlach with some cute bard girl or something, someone just as fun and nice as she is. And you know what? Wyll and Gale is starting to grow on me. They’re both characters who try to “woo” Tav before doing anything, Gale with the Weave and Wyll with his dance.
Imagine, Gale teaching Wyll the secrets of the weave, likely Wyll has never interacted with it properly as his magic comes from a devil. This could help unlock Wyll and on some level separate him from Mizora. Oh wow, both these men have been manipulated and abused by extremely powerful non-humanoid women. They’re both self sacrificing gits who want to be the hero, both sacrificed much for power. I think it would start when Mizora first appears in camp, maybe. Gale would go to comfort Wyll over the transformation, maybe even compliment his horns. During the night of celebration Gale would see Wyll by the beach and offer to show him something magical, aka the Weave scene. They make some jokes and Wyll mentions the dancing, Gale prods, and Wyll says maybe another time.
GAH
I FEEL LIKE A FUCKING GENIUS
Alright, so, summary
Lae’zel and Shadowheart
Karlach and cute girl (if Alfira survived Durge I’d choose her but oh well)
Durge, Astarion, and Halsin
Gale and Wyll
EDIT: This post is no longer accurate to my views or feelings on the matter! I will write another one eventually since I actually know the characters a lot better. This was legit written before I even got to act 2 and I barely did anything in act 1
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silly-writes · 1 year ago
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Prompt: Camper (Courtney, Gwen, Heather, Sky, Cody, etc.) falls for a reader who tries their best but silently suffers from Imposter Syndrome quite a bit with said camper being the only person to realize the self doubt of the reader yet still falls in love with reader. How'd things develop?
More characters with a reader who suffer from imposter syndrome!
Hello anon! I got this request already but not all the same characters are included so Courtney, Gwen and Heather are linked here! Sky and Cody for this prompt below the cut! enjoy!
Sky
Being heavily competitive, she's not in this game for the heart to hearts.
I would imagine it would take a lot for her to notice something like this, but as she started to fall for you it would become more and more apparent to her.
Based on everything that happened to Dave I also feel like she would not really ever officially confess to you, trying to keep things relatively professional, so to speak.
It wasn't until one day when she was talking to you (or rather strategizing) that she realized how deep it really ran.
"I probably shouldn't go first," you say.
She nods "you're right, you're probably our strongest player for this next challenge. We should finish strong so you should go last."
You gave her a forced smile then explained "I know you really care about winning... maybe I should just go in the middle or something."
You were terrified of screwing things up, but even more so of screwing things up for Sky. It'd be your funeral if you messed things up for her.
Meanwhile Sky is trying to figure out how you could see it fit to hide your skill, she's upfront about what she's good at, never shy about it, and she doesn't see any reason why you shouldn't be the same.
"Well that's ridiculous. I mean if you want to throw, sure you can go in the middle. We're in it to win it though, right?" She says elbowing you playfully.
Sky tries to uplift you by letting you take the lead when you offer it, and I would imagine the two of you would become sort of the unspoken leaders of your team.
Nobody makes any decisions without discussing it with the two of you first.
Cody
Cody is absolutely stunned by everything you're amazing at, absolutely in awe of it every time.
He's even more amazed that you give him the time of day, especially since you're so cool, and skilled, and he's so- well not. (sorry cody <3)
He tries to impress you always, literally at every turn.
He ends up embarrassing himself at tasks you could've cleared in under a minute while he's struggling with it for up to ten.
But to you it is oddly endearing.
He never has any reason to believe you don't know how utterly amazing you are.
Until one day he's trying again, trying to lift up the canoe to shove it into the water.
You're watching him struggle, but it would be beyond rude to offer to do it instead, so you just sit.
He sighs sliding down against the beach floor "ugh. You had better just save me any more humiliation and help me now."
"What? I think you've got it."
He scoffed, turning towards you "just do it will you?"
He got into the boat grumpily, and you easily slid the both of you into the water and started rowing.
"Why do you let me do that when you could've easily just slid us into the water. We're so behind now."
I think maybe he takes your silence as if you're making fun of him or something.
"I didn't think I could," you shrug.
"But you're so amazing at like, everything."
You hum softly a bit instead of responding.
"You had better know that by now," he scolds a little bit, catching onto your self conscious attitude.
"Whatever you say," you say quietly.
After that he's more determined than ever to show you off, and compliment and praise you over every little thing, no matter how simple, or silly it is.
He just wants you to see yourself how he sees you.
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pikapeppa · 11 months ago
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Karlach/Dammon: Burning Blue
A wish fulfillment fic to answer the question: what if Dammon was the lucky guy to break Karlach's ten-year celibacy streak?
NSFW smut, ~7500 words, from Karlach's precious POV. This takes place the same night that Dammon makes Karlach very touchable again. 🥰 Read here on AO3 instead.
*****************
I’m nervous. Gods, I’m fucking nervous. No, no, don’t be nervous, Big K, you’ve got this. It’s nothing you haven’t done before! It’s just a good old-fashioned come-on, that’s all. Just a good old-fashioned invitation for Dammon to do the beast with two backs with you. No sweat, nothing to worry about, no reason to feel like your engine’s gonna thrum its way right out of your chest.
Ugh, fine, I’m nervous. I’ll admit it, all right? I’m nervous. But how can you blame me? It’s been a decade since I laid a finger on another living soul. One who wasn’t a hellspawn or trying to kill me, I should say. Yeah, the Avernus kind of laying-a-finger-on-someone is really not what I have in mind right now.
All right, there he is. I mean, of course he’s there, it’s his smithy setup in the barn, where the fuck else would be be? Shit, I’m so nervous. What if he says no? What if he doesn’t want to hit the bedroll with me? I might just crumble up into a pile of ash on the spot if he turns me down…
Ohhh, no you don’t. No more doubt. Not another negative word, you hear me? We’re doing this. Come on, soldier, shape up, be confident, all right? Just be your usual big beautiful bold badass self, just like Brynn said. Back straight, head high, tail-barb up: come on, girl, you can do this.
“Dammon! Hi! How’s the hammering going?” Nice, good start. Solid greeting, nothing weird about that.
“Karlach!” he says. “You’re back. I thought you were off to camp for the night.”
He’s smiling at me. Gods, does he ever have a nice smile. It’s like his whole face gets lit up with sunshine. And those eyes? Phwoar. I wonder if anyone’s ever told him how pretty his eyes are. Like two big blue jewels. Or like lightning turned into jewels. Wait, what’s all this nonsense I’m saying? I think I’ve been spending too much time with Gale. Ha, saying something would be a good idea right about now, wouldn’t it?
“Yeah, I’m back. I was wondering, do you — are you done for the day?” It looks like he’s done for the day. His forge is still hot, but it’s just coals now rather than a big old fire. Gods, I hope he’s done for the day.
“Yes, I’m just finishing up,” he says (yay!). “Did you need something repaired? I can rekindle the fire, it’s no problem—”
“No, no, all good. Everything’s tip-top, thanks to you. Listen, I was wondering: d’you want to have a drink with me?”
His whole face lights up, and my gods, I swear: if I had a heart, it would’ve done a fluttery thing like something from a romance book. “That sounds great. Let’s go on inside.” He hangs up his apron, and then we’re heading to the inn.
Yes! First step done, we’re off to a cracking good start! Here we go, inside the inn for a drink, just me and Dammon. How great is this? I mean, not that it’s not wonderful being with Brynn and Wyll and all the rest of those adorable little dumplings, but there’s something special to be said about being alone with just you and the person you’ve got mad horns for.
Here we are, at the door to the inn — and Dammon touches my shoulder. “Go ahead.”
He’s touching my shoulder. His hand, that strong callused hand on my shoulder. He’s touching me, he can touch me, and it’s all thanks to him. Gods, I want to ride him until the sun comes up.
Keep it together, Karlach. Stay cool until you find out if he wants this too. Ha, stay cool! I can sort of almost do that now! Enough for touching, at least, which is all I want in the world right now, and Dammon is touching my shoulder, and… and I should probably get inside the inn now.
I step inside — quick little rub of Darkmaw’s paw for luck. Ooh, Jaheira is still awake, I love her, she’s so damned cool!
Dammon leads me to one of the tables near the bar. “What can I get you? Wine? Beer? The beer is even cold, thanks to Jaheira—”
“Cold beer? Sign me the fuck up!”
He smiles — ugh, swoon! — and off he goes to the bar to find some beer. And here I am, sitting at this table, happier than the happiest clam that ever lived in the sandy banks of the Chionthar. Ha, that was a funny line! I mean, I think it was funny. I bet Wyll will, too. I’ll have to tell him about it — maybe he can add it to one of his stories!
Gods, this inn is nice: all candle-lit and quiet since it’s nighttime, real cozy-like. Perfect for telling a certain smith that he’s one of the kindest, warmest, most wonderful people you’ve ever met and that you fancy his pants off — literally, if he wants it that way. Ohh, I’m getting nervous again. It’s fine, it’s fine, it’s going to be fine.
Dammon comes back and sets down two steins. “Are you all right?”
“I’m better than all right. I’m fantastic.” I lift my stein. “Cheers to you, Dammon. For everything. I really mean that.”
Another killer smile. “Cheers back to you, Karlach.” He taps his stein to mine, then brings it to his mouth, and I do the same — ohhh, beer. Cold beer, my gods, I’d forgotten exactly how good this was! I take another swallow and another — okay, honestly, I am so thirsty. And now I’m out of beer, and Dammon is smiling at me, and no, no, I can’t throw myself at him across the table, I can’t.
He chuckles and puts down his stein. “Can I get you another?”
“Naw, I’m good,” I laugh. “This was great, thanks.”
He nods and rests his elbows on the table (hellooo, rolled-up sleeves and forearms). “So what did you want to talk about? Do you have questions about your engine?”
“No, it’s not that.” No fucking way am I thinking about that right now. “I wanted to ask if, um…” Don’t be nervous, girl. You’ve got this. “You said before that I was — that I’m… touchable. Very touchable.”
Oh no, his smile’s fading. “Yeah, I did. I’m…” He rubs the back of his neck. “I’m sorry about that. Maybe I crossed a line…? This is a big — a huge deal for you, I know it must be overwhelming, the last thing you need—”
Wait wait wait! “Hang on, slow down. You think you crossed a line?”
“I… didn’t I? That’s not what you wanted to say?”
“Hells, no!” Woah, voice down, there are people sleeping in the room next door. “Are you kidding?” I say (quietly). “If that’s what you call crossing the line, I want you to cross all the lines.”
He looks gobsmacked now, which is really fucking cute. “You do?”
“Yeah, I do. I really, really do. If you want to, I mean. I don’t — I mean, I know I’m a lot of heat to handle, but I…” Fuck, my engine feels like it’s roaring. Please, gods, let him want this too. “I want to be with you, Dammon. I… It’s been so long since I was with anyone, and — and now that I can be with someone, I… I want it to be you.”
He doesn’t say anything. He’s staring at me like a fish, actually. Oh fuck, am I totally off base here? Noooo. “No pressure, though! No — I mean, if you’re not into… If I’m jumping the hatchet here, that’s totally fine, it’s not a problem—”
“No!” he blurts. “It’s not that. Believe me, Karlach, it’s not that I don’t want to. I mean — what I mean is that I…” He’s smiling again, thank all the fucking gods. “I would love to be with you, actually. I just… I can’t believe it’s me you want.”
I would love to be with you. I would love to be with you. He said that, right? Those were the words he said? Dammon the amazing smith with the amazing sinew-y hands said that to me, right? Oh shit, he’s still talking.
He gestures at me. “I mean, look at you. You’re Karlach. The Karlach, the destroyer of demons and devilspawn. You’re a hero.”
Oh my gods. Is that really what he thinks? “Wha—? Oh come on! It’s not like that.”
“It is like that,” he insists. “Haven’t you spoken to the kids? Mattis and Ide and them? I mean, I know you have, but you know they worship you, right? You’re like a goddess to them.” He looks around like he’s checking for spies, then lowers his voice. “Honestly? I think you’re better for them than a goddess, because you’re real to them. You mean something to them, Karlach. You’ve given them someone to look up to. That’s no small thing for a group of tiefling kids with no parents to look up to anymore.”
Fuck, I’m gonna cry. He doesn’t even know about Mum and Dad, and he hit the nail right on the fucking head.
He touches my hand — oh fuck, he’s not just touching my hand, but holding my hand. Turning my hand over on the table, his fingers sliding over my palm, his fingers curling into mine like he did right after he fixed me… Gods, my entire throat is full of fucking tears.
“I would love to be with you, Karlach,” he says in the softest voice. “If you’re sure this is what you want.”
Oh, hells. He’s going to make me weep. Swallow it down, soldier, gulp those tears down! “Let’s get outta here. Will you come back to my camp?”
“Actually…” Ooh, what’s this cheeky look on his face? Cute! “Would you be interested in a bed?”
What? No way! “A bed? You’ve got a claim on one of the beds here?”
“Sort of. Me and the other grown-ups have a rotation with one of the rooms upstairs. Taking turns having a little peace and privacy for a night.”
“You and the grown-ups?”
“Yeah — well, we offered to the kids, too, but they want to stay together on the main floor, where the Harpers are. Can’t really blame them, either. But anyway, um, what I was trying to say is, um.” He clears his throat. “If you’d rather use a bed than a bedroll, there’s—”
I’m already on my feet. “Bed. You and me. Now.”
He smiles — gods, that brilliant smile. And he’s on his feet too now, we’re heading for the stairs — oh my gods, he’s holding my hand again. Dammon is holding my hand, his fingers are between my fingers, how fucking nice is this? How long have I been thinking about this — no, dreaming about this? Easy, Karlach, keep those tears in your eyes.
He gives me a little smile as we walk up the stairs. “Fair warning that it was Rolan’s turn in the bed last night, so it might smell a little magical.”
What! Is that a thing? Gale and Brynn never said that was a thing! “Really? What does magic smell like?”
“Oh, no, I — I’m just joking.” Dammon smiles and rubs the back of his neck. “It was a bad joke. Sorry. Pretend you didn’t—”
I kiss him. How could I not kiss him? He’s so — oh, gods, he’s kissing me. His lips, my lips, his hands in mine, we’re — we’re kissing, we’re kissing! Dammon the smith is kissing me, and he’s… Would it be naff as all the hells if I said he was dreamy? Fuck it, who cares if it’s naff? He is gods-damned dreamy. As much as his hands are callused, his lips are so fucking soft, and I’m… I am melting. I swear, I’m melting, he’s making my lips melt apart like a hot knife in butter, he’s touching his tongue to mine… Gods, his hands though? How he uses them? This is fucking magic. His thumbs are sliding over my wrists, his palms skimming up my arms, over my shoulders, oh gods, oh gods oh gods…!
His hands cradle my neck, and his tongue slides into my mouth, and I’m — I’m… I can’t think. I can’t think, I can’t — I can just feel. I feel him: his lips his tongue his hands — how close he is, the nearness of his body to mine, I feel… fuck, I feel everything, every touch of his fingers and every stroke of his tongue, and I — he — shit, was that me? That little kitten-y sound: was that actually me? I’ve never made a sound like that in my life.
He breaks the kiss, presses his horns to mine. “Are you all right?”
I’m a puddle. I can’t talk. I just nod.
He smiles (arghhh, as if I’m not melted enough already!). “You’re burning blue,” he whispers.
Huh? “Huh?”
“You’re burning blue.” He rests his palm on my chest — oh shit, I really am burning blue. I… I’m burning blue but — but I’m not burning him!
“You’re…” My hand’s fucking shaking as I press it over his. “You don’t feel that? Not even a little singe?”
“Not even a little singe.” His eyebrows do that little mischief-quirky thing. “I told you, I’m good.”
I laugh. I can’t help it: I’m as giddy as a kid on her birthday. “Oh ho-ho, boy, you don’t know what you’re doing by saying things like that in a voice like that.” I step closer to him.
His gorgeous smile gets even bigger. “Or maybe I know exactly what I’m doing,” he says, still in that voice — oh, gods yes, his hands are on my neck again, so callused and so fucking gentle—
“Ahem.”
Fuck, Jaheira’s right behind us! “J-Jaheira! I mean, uh, ma’am!” Shit, should I bow to her? What should I do? She’s looking at me!
She smiles — the Jaheira is smiling at me! — then tilts her head. “Karlach, is it?”
She remembers my name! Snap to attention, soldier! “Yes ma’am, that’s me.”
She nods to Dammon too. “Dammon. Good evening. Let it be known that no one begrudges you your fun, but perhaps you should have it elsewhere that isn’t right at the top of the stairs. The only stairs that leads to the upper floor…?”
All right, now I’m going to melt from embarrassment. “Of course! Right! Uh, right! Uh—”
Dammon cuts me off, thank fuck. “Sorry, Jaheira,” he says. “We’ll get out of your way. Out of the way, I mean.” He takes my hand again, and I’m following him down the hall to one of the rooms: a simple little room with a nice cushy-looking double bed.
He leads me inside and closes the door. We look at each other. And we just crack up, we just totally — we’re both laughing like loons, just laughing so hard I can hardly fucking breathe. Augh, my ribs are starting to hurt, I’m laughing so hard!
“Here, sit down,” Dammon chuckles. He leads me over to the bed, and I let him guide me there.
Then I push him down and straddle him.
His gorgeous eyes get big. “Oh! Are you—”
I kiss him again — gods, he’s so delicious. Soft lips, hot tongue, strong hands: oh, I could just die for the touch of his hands. They’re circling my waist, they’re gripping my hips, they’re curling around my thighs… Fuuuck, gods, I’m sparking. Feels like everything’s sparking, like everywhere he touches is shooting with sparks, and I can’t… I can’t wait. I can’t wait anymore. I need more, I need his fucking hands, I need his hands on my skin.
I rip off my top and chuck it on the floor, and his baby-blues drop to my tits. “W-wow. I—”
I grab his collar and I shove my tongue into his mouth — fuck, his tongue tangling with mine: mm, just imagine feeling that sweet tongue in other places… Hellfire take me, I need this man more than I need air.
I climb off of him and start unbuttoning the ol’ trousers, and he grabs my hands. “Hey, hey. Easy, Karlach. Slow down. You don’t need to rush.”
Easy? Slow down? He’s kidding, right? It’s like I’ve never known the meaning of the word. “I…” Fuck, I’m breathing hard, I’m breathing so hard, and every breath feels like it’s making me hotter. Easy, Karlach, slow it down for him.
I gulp down a breath. “I hear you, soldier. But I have to tell you, I… Sometimes it feels like I’ve only got two modes: off, and on-on-on. I don’t…” Damn it, Karlach, breathe. “You might need to show me how to do this slowing-down thing.”
He smiles, and I swear, something inside of me absolutely melts. He’s got this way about him when he smiles, like his smile makes his face softer even when he’s showing his teeth, and it just… It’s such a special smile, you know? Like the way it feels when your mum watches you eating your favourite meal that she made? That’s how Dammon’s smile feels, and I swear on my life, if I still had a heart, it would be swelling up to five times its normal size.
He shifts off of the bed. “I’m happy to show you,” he says, and gods save me, he’s using that voice again. “Maybe I can start with…?” He gestures at my trousers and gives me a can-I? kind of look.
“Yes,” I say loudly. “Fuck yes.”
A big brilliant smile, and then he’s — ah, fuck yes, he’s undoing the buttons on my pants. He’s popping the buttons one by one, not even touching me as he does it, but I swear to all the gods, watching him do this is making me hotter than I’ve ever been in my life. And that includes when Zariel first put this fucking engine in my chest. No, don’t think about Zariel, forget about her.
Dammon pops the last button, then looks at me. “Can I take them off?”
“Please. Rip them off for all I care!”
He grins — gods, he’s a stupidly beautiful man. He’s pulling down my shabby trousers now, finally, pulling the damn things down over my hips and my ass and — oh. Oh my gods, oh my gods he’s kneeling in front of me this is not a drill!.
He sighs. “Karlach, you’re… really beautiful, you know that?”
He’s kneeling in front of me. Dammon is kneeling in front of me. He’s looking at me, his hand is curled around my ankle, and — oh, fuck me, his tail-barb is tracing my calf, his tail is coiling around my calf. His tail, his hand, his — even just his beautiful blue eyes on my skin: he’s seeing me, all of me, my bare fucking skin that nobody’s seen for ten fucking years.
“Are you all right?” His tail-barb strokes my knee, his hand squeezes my calf — fuck, I can’t cope with this.
I grab his shirt and pull. “Please, I — please, Dammon!”
He stands up. “What’s wrong? What can I do?”
I kiss him again. I know, I know, I keep fucking doing it, I keep sticking my tongue down his throat, but he’s so… I… Fuck, his hands are on my hips, on my back, he’s — shit, he’s stroking my shoulder blades. His fingers are tracing over my vents like it’s the most normal thing in the world to touch a woman with fucking vents in her skin, and I’m… I feel so… It’s like I’m full, my chest, my tummy, it’s like I’m so, so full — but it just reminds me of how empty I’ve been for so long. And I need him to… I need more. I have to have more. I need him to remind me of how good it is to feel this fucking full.
I grip his collar. “I need you naked. Right now.”
He laughs: argh, that laugh, how soft it is, how sweet! “I thought you wanted me to show you ‘slow’.”
“You can show me slow with your kit off.” I know what I sound like, I sound desperate as all the hells, but I do not fucking care. A river of blue heat is running through my veins, and my skin is fucking vibrating for more: more of him, more of his skin touching mine — gods, I want to slide against him like we’ve both been fucking greased.
“All right,” he chuckles. “You talked me into it.” He takes off his scarf, then starts taking off his vest, and I start working on his belt. I’m just helping, right? Just being a good old helper, that’s me. Ha, his belt is off, his vest is off, just a pesky shirt and trousers now — oh-ho, he’s a fast one with the shirt, we love a man who can strip like a fast-changer at the circus! It’s just the trousers left now. I grab for his laces —
Oh yes, he’s kissing me. His hands on my neck, his tongue so fucking sweet and slow in my mouth — gods alive, kissing is fantastic, so fucking fantastic it’s unreal. He’s pulling me close, his hands on my hips and his chest — fuuuck me Dammon, his sternal ridges are rubbing my nipples.
I can’t fucking cope. I can’t fucking cope, I can’t think, it feels so fucking good, I’m making that noise again like a hungry kitten begging for milk…
He peels his lips from mine. “See? I knew you could do it.”
“Do what?” I whimper. Yes, I whimpered like a kitten, all right? Whatever, shut up about it.
“You’re going slow,” he says in that voice. “You’re doing it right now.”
I’ve not a clue what he’s talking about. I’ve never felt less slow in my whole fucking life. “What do you mean?”
“My trousers,” he says. “You stopped trying to take them off.”
I burst out laughing. (It’s mostly hysteria, I’m fucking telling you.) “It’s not ‘cause I want to stop! I just can’t, uh…” Oh gods oh gods: his tail. His tail-barb is caressing my butt and giving me shivers — gods, what a life! When was the last time I got a shiver about anything? — oh my fucking gods, his tail is twining around my thigh.
I can’t breathe. I can’t think. I’m alive with desire, I’m so fucking alive, and all he’s doing is curling his tail around my upper thigh. But his tail is so close — he’s so close, the smooth heat of his tail curling so fucking close to where I’m burning so hot…
That kitten noise squeaks out of me again. “Dammon, please…” I stroke his chest — my palms on his chest, my fingers on the ridges of his ribs, I’m touching him. I’m pressed against him from thigh to chest, I’m pulling him closer with my tail, I’m petting the ridges of his back and his shoulder blades — ooh, he’s got wingtips!
“You have wingtips!” I gasp. “Aw, how lucky are you? My mum always said these were good luck!”
He laughs that precious little laugh. “My grandmother said the same. Said it means I’ll be able to fly in my next life.”
“Aww, I love that. Makes me extra-wish I had a pair myself.” I trace the sharp little hooks with my fingers, then keep running my hands over the ridges of his back. Damn, skin is amazing. It’s really an amazing, amazing thing, and nobody even bothers to think about how amazing it is. Skin and muscles, too, like these nice wiry ropes of muscles in his upper back and his arms… Phwoar, his arms are bloody fit. I mean, of course they are, he’s a fucking smith, but still: I didn’t realize just how damn fit he was under his clothes. And these veins in his forearms? The way they pop, and the burn scars on his forearms and his hands? He might even have more scars on his arms and hands than I do, which is saying a hell of a lot.
Hellfire fucking take me, he is gods-damned beautiful. The scars, the ridges of his spine and his sternum, the wiry muscle of his smithy’s bod — not just his body, either, but his jaw, his nose, that heart-melting jewel-eyed smile…
Oops. Embarrassing. I went totally silent while I was touching him. “Sorry. Went into my own little world for a minute there.”
Another soft laugh. “Don’t even think about being sorry,” he says, and he lifts his hand… Ohhh, he’s touching my cheek. He’s holding my cheek in his palm, just cradling my cheek like it’s a baby bird… How long has it been since I’ve had a hand on my cheek? A nice hand, mind you, not a blood-covered clawed hand trying to gouge my eyes out. Too fucking long, that’s how: too fucking long with no caring hands to touch me or hold me or hug me when things got fucking rough. But that’s all over now, thanks to Dammon. I can touch and be touched, I can kiss and be kissed, I can climb this rip-roaringly gorgeous man in front of me, and I swear to every god that’s listening that that’s what I’m going to do all night long.
I kiss him and pull him close with my hands and tail. I stroke his spine with my tail-barb, I lick his tongue like it’s the sweetest thing in all the realms, I rub myself against him like I’m some pent-up kid who doesn’t know what they’re doing yet, and it all feels fucking fantastic. And he’s touching me too, his claws scratching my neck so super-gently while we kiss, his hands on my back, my hips — wowee, his hands on my ass! I want that, yes more—!
He palms my backside and pulls me tight to his body — fuck, he’s hard. He’s hard he’s hard he’s hard, I can feel him rubbing against my ladybits through his trousers — augh he’s still wearing trousers, fuck my life upside down!
I break from his kiss. “Take your trousers off,” I beg. “Just take them off already, all right? I need them off, I can’t — I really really want them off!”
“I’ll take them off. It’s all right,” he says in this dreamy calm-soothing voice, and his tail starts uncurling from around my thigh—
Fuck fuck fuck oh my gods yes his tail is sliding between my legs. It’s — fuck, his tail, he’s petting my cunt with his tail, it’s sliding between my legs and stroking me as it unwinds from my thigh and oh my gods it feels so good, how am I supposed to survive—? “Mm ah fuck!”
His tail is gone. His arms are around me. “Was that okay?”
I am fucking gasping. “You tease,” I choke out.
He laughs, his lips close to mine. “Not a tease. I’m going to carry through, I promise.” Mmm, he’s kissing me again, he’s so fucking yummy, and he’s untying his trousers and I’m vibrating and I can hardly keep fucking still—
He pushes his trousers down and his cock is out. His cock, it’s hard, he’s hard — oh my god his cock. It’s gorgeous. I mean, it’s a cock, cocks are always a little funny-looking, I don’t know how folks who’ve got ‘em can cope with them, but Dammon’s is out and it’s gorgeous — fuck me yes he’s stroking it I want to do that.
I push his hand away, replace it with mine, and he gasps. “Ah—”
I kiss him. I’m stroking him, I’m walking him back toward the bed, he falls onto the bed and I’m climbing onto him and gasping into his mouth and stroking this thick pretty cock of his—
His hands are in my hair. “Karlach, slow down,” he gasps. “Slow down for a minute, all right?”
Fuuuck, fuck fuck, I can’t. No, I have to, I have to slow down for him. “Help me,” I beg. “I don’t know how.”
“It’s all right,” he pants, and he presses his horns to mine. “Just breathe with me for a second, okay?”
I nod. Breathe, I can do that, that’s totally something I can do. Just breathe. I close my eyes, I feel the sweet ridges of his horns against mine, I feel his breath tickling my lips because he’s breathing too, I feel — woah yes, that’s his tail. His tail-barb is tracing my lower spine, tracing lower still — eep he poked my bum!
I burst out a laugh. “You rotter!”
He laughs, too: fuck me, I adore his laugh. He’s laughing against my lips, his tail-barb is gliding down over my bum… oh fuck, it’s moving down to my thigh, around my thigh, drifting between my legs, is he going to—? Oh gods Dammon please yes!
“Yes!” I gasp — fuck, his tail, he’s petting my cunt with his tail oh my gods I’m going to explode.
“Easy, Karlach,” he whispers. His hands cradle my neck, perfect callused hands, fuck his tail is petting me, caressing me, touching parts of me that I’ve been dreaming of being touched for years — ah yes that’s the fucking spot right there, right there fuck right there yes!
“Dammon,” I mewl — yes, I fucking mewled like a cat, I’m mewling and my back is arching like I’m a bitch in heat, but really? That’s exactly what I am. I’m in fucking heat for this man. I’m burning for him, burning for more of this, burning alive with his tail petting that red-hot little button of love. Dammon’s breathing hard, too, his fingers gripping my hair and his hips moving under me while his tail-barb does its work between my legs. It’s like he’s getting desperate too, so desperate that he can’t keep still while his tail is petting me, and I love that he’s getting desperate. I want him to unravel just like I’m doing now. I want to hear him moaning, I want to see him bucking his hips for more, I want — I want him so badly, I want this so much, it’s happening right now and I still want it like it’s out of my reach. How does that make any sense? Why am I longing for something while it’s happening right now, right here, with this insanely beautiful man I’ve been fantasizing about since I first clapped eyes on him?
Oh fuck, why am I getting emotional?
He strokes my hair. “Hey, are you okay?”
Oh gods, there’s a moan to his voice already. He’s breathing hard like he’s the one being touched, like he’s the one who’s getting tail-fucked more perfectly than even my best fantasies — ah, fuck me, his touch, the way his tail is rubbing my clit just right, it’s so — he’s so, so fucking perfect, he feels so right, this feels so right: Dammon’s hands in my hair, his body under mine, his tail petting my cunt and his lips breathing into mine… My gods, I’m so… he’s so, this is, I’m… fuck, I’m so close, I’m getting closer, I’m going to fucking blow I’m going to—
Yes. Yes yes yesyesyesfuckmeican’tbreatheohmygods kiss me Dammon fucking kiss me—
His tongue in my mouth. Moaning, is that me or him? No idea, who cares, I’m a fucking inferno. Everything sparking, like lightning under my skin and scorching my throat in the best fucking way, all because of him.
His lips leave mine. His voice, husky and soft. “You all right?”
I whimper. Still vibrating. No words, can’t talk. Need him to fuck me.
He strokes my broken horn, strokes my cheek. “You’re burning blue, Karlach.”
I sure fucking am. Burning blue, burning alive in ways that I didn’t think I ever would again, and it’s all because of him. It’s all him, it’s Dammon — his sunshine smile, his jewel-pretty eyes the colour of a summer sky: I’m burning blue, all because of him.
I nuzzle his ear. “I’m going to ride you until you see stars, soldier.”
He laugh-moans. “Yes please. I’m all for that.”
He’d better be, because I can’t hold back now. I can’t do slow now. I am on, on-on-on like I’ve never been before, and I’m sitting upright on his lap and I’m stroking his cock while he grips my thighs — gods I want to taste him, I want his come in my mouth, no no I’ll save that for later, I need him inside of me right fucking now—
Fuck yes he’s inside me fuck yes. Dammon is inside of me, and he feels like fucking heaven.
He groans, and it’s the prettiest sound I’ve ever heard. “Gods, Karlach!”
I take it back: hearing my name like that is the prettiest sound I’ve ever heard. I stroke his chest — beautiful chest, beautiful ridges of his ribs — then I brace myself on his abs and start fucking him hard.
He groans, arches his neck in a way that makes me want to bite him (ha, don’t tell Astarion!): oh, my sweet fucking gods, he feels amazing. His cock is driving into me so hard, so sweet and hard that I’m making noise with every stroke, and he’s making noise too and gripping my thighs — ah, his tail, it’s coiling around my forearm in a way that makes my tummy flutter, and his eyelids are fluttering too like he’s really letting loose, which I love to see. I love seeing him like this, I love seeing him looking as good as he makes me feel, and fuck does he ever make me feel good. His thick fucking cock, the hot driving punch of it reaching so deep… Holy fucking hells, I missed this, I missed it so fucking much, and it’s so much better than I remembered. Dammon’s solid body under mine, his strong smithy’s hands on my hips and thighs, his tail squeezing my arm like the way he holds my hand, and those eyes: his beautiful eyes, the way he’s watching me under his half-lidded eyes while I ride him like my life hinges on his cock… Fuck me, did it ever really feel like this? Was it ever really this good?
Wait, wait a second: was sex ever this fucking good before?
I’m staring at Dammon now. Just staring at this kind and gorgeous man who’s filling me up within an inch of my life, and I… I don’t know that it’s ever been like this. I don’t know that it ever has been this good before. Sex is always great, don’t get me wrong, but it’s never… My gods, it’s never been like this. It’s never felt so… so close. So right. Fuck, it’s never felt as right as it does right now with him — how fucking weird is that? We’re in an abandoned inn in a place that’s been cursed to the shadows for a hundred years, and it’s somehow the most right that I’ve ever felt while being naked with another soul.
Wait, though: it gets even weirder. I’m with Dammon, an infernal smith who I might never have even spoken to if it wasn’t for the engine in my chest — the engine that’s slowly burning me alive. If I didn’t have this damned thing in my chest, I wouldn’t be here with him. We wouldn’t be here together doing this.
I’m having the time of my fucking life right now with the most wonderful man I’ve ever met because of something that’s going to kill me.
No, no no no, stop it brain, don’t think about it—
“Hey.” He’s sitting up on one elbow — no, he’s pushing himself upright and reaching for my cheek. “Hey, hey now, are you okay—”
I kiss him. I shove my tongue into his mouth and grip his neck, and I fuck him like there’s no tomorrow. I fuck him like this is it, like this is the only chance we’ll have and I have to show him how much this means, how good this is and how good it is because of him, because it’s him, Dammon: it’s Dammon’s body under mine, and his hand and his tail holding me, it’s all him, and I need him to know that there’s nothing I wanted more in this world than to be with him.
He breaks from my lips with the most incredible groan. “Ah, Karlach—”
I nuzzle his ear. “I want you so bad, Dammon. I want you more than anything.”
He groans again — gods, if only you could bottle a noise and keep it for later. “I’m all yours. I promise.”
My gods, what a promise. What a thing to say, what a thing to hear from someone who’s so fucking good. And now I don’t know what to say, my tongue’s a knot, my throat’s getting thick — gods, just fuck him already, just wring the pleasure out of him like he did for you.
I fuck him. I’m riding him hard. I’m bouncing on his beautiful cock and staring at his beautiful face while it crinkles up with pleasure — come for me, Dammon, I want you to. I really want him to, I want his come more than anything in the world, I want him to let it all go inside of me — oh yes, good boy, he’s getting even harder, he’s getting harder inside of me oh my gods fuck I know he’s going to come—
“A-ah, please, y-yes—!” He kisses me, Dammon is kissing me, his tongue thrusting into my mouth and his hand firm at the back of my neck, he’s shuddering and pulsing deep inside — yes, I can feel him giving me his come, and I want it all. I’m fucking hungry for it, for every last drop of him, every little bit of proof that this was me and him together: Dammon and Karlach, Karlach and Dammon, two hells-touched tieflings finding our little place of light among the shadows.
He breaks our kiss and presses his horns to mine again. “Gods,” he pants. “Gods alive. You are… incredible.” He laughs, this husky I’m-out-of-breath-because-I’ve-been-fucking kind of laugh, and I swear I’d give my unbroken horn to be able to hear that laugh every day for the rest of my life, no matter how long or short it is.
He leans away a little and strokes my hair. “How are you feeling?”
Gods, look at him: he’s perfect. He said I was burning blue, but I swear on my life, his eyes are incandescent. They’re the brightest, most electric blue I’ve ever seen in my life, and it’s like they’re scorching my soul, branding this amazing moment deep into me so that it’ll never be forgotten, no matter what comes next.
Fuck, I feel so full. I’m so… my chest, my throat, my entire fucking soul feels full. Oh no, my eyes feel full too, oh no — don’t do this, Karlach, don’t you dare.
“I—” Oh fuck, I’m sobbing. I’m sobbing? Why now, why?
“Hey, hey, it’s okay. Come here, it’s okay.” He’s tucking my head against his neck — oh my gods, I’m falling apart. He’s hugging me, his tail is stroking my back like he’s comforting a child, which is funny ‘cause I’m weeping like a baby. No, not weeping: I’m fucking bawling. That’s fantastic, Karlach, that’s just great, let’s just bawl all over the gorgeous smith while his cock is still in me.
Okay, that’s kind of funny, but… Fuck, I can’t stop crying. It’s all just coming out now, everything, all the stuff that’s been going on: the tadpole, my engine, the shadow curse and how fucking awful it is here, Lae’zel almost dying at the crèche and Mizora being a fucking bitch to Wyll and Astarion making his snarky little jokes like he’s not dead-scared of Cazador. I’m just fucking sobbing, I’m howling for me and them and everything, and more stuff keeps coming out: Gortash, Zariel, Avernus, Mum and Dad — everything, it’s just fucking everything, it’s all the things, so much shit I haven’t cried about for years, and it’s all coming out on poor Dammon because he’s hugging me.
Dammon is hugging me. He’s just hugging me while I cry all over him, hugging me tight like I haven’t been hugged in fucking years, and I don’t know if I can stop.
I do stop, eventually, when it feels like every tear in my body is on his neck instead of in my eyes. When I finally stop crying, he speaks. “Are you all right?”
Gods be damned, his soft voice, his hand petting my back… He’s going to make me cry again. “I’m okay,” I say. “Stuffy, but okay.” I lift my head — eurgh, yep, lots of tears and snot on his neck. Real attractive, Karlach, really sexy stuff.
“Sorry.” I wipe my face real quick and start wiping his neck. “Sorry. That’s gross. I’m so sorry—”
“Don’t be sorry,” he says. “You needed that. There’s nothing to be sorry for.” Oh hells, now he’s wiping my cheeks… Did someone make this man on purpose to turn me into the world’s meltiest puddle? He’s wiping my cheeks and looking at me in that so-soft way with his beautiful soft eyes… Oh boy, I’m a goner. If I wasn’t already all fluttery for him, I’m a total loss now.
He strokes my shoulder. “Do you have to head back to your camp?”
No way. I don’t want to go back. I want to stay here with him and make this night last forever. Don’t say that, though, you’ll sound like a limpet. “I can stay for a while,” I say, all casual-like. “If you want, I mean. I — unless you have to sleep? You probably have to get up early for the forge—”
“No, no,” he says quickly. “I can get up whenever, that doesn’t matter. Either way, if you — if you don’t have to get back, maybe…” He clears his throat — aw, he’s looking shy! Why is he looking shy? “Maybe you’d like to stay the night? With me, I mean?”
He wants me to stay? He wants me to stay! “Yes! I mean—” Oh gods, I’m laughing now. “Yes. I’d love to stay with you.”
He smiles — oh gods, that killer smile. He’s going to destroy me with that smile before the night is through, I swear. “Great! That’s — that’s really great. Okay.” He laughs a little and strokes my arm. “Maybe I can take my trousers off, if that’s okay with you?”
“Your—?” I twist around on his lap to look — ha, oh shit, his trousers are down around his calves, and he’s still wearing his boots!
I laugh and climb off of him. “You didn’t take them off? Bit eager, are we?”
“Me? You didn’t give me a chance! So much for slowing down.” He’s grinning now as he pulls off his boots, and he’s so damned pretty that all I can do is smile back at him. Gods, I really am a goner.
He drops his boots on the floor. He’s totally naked now, naked and warm and perfect, and I don’t want to waste another second not touching all of that perfect naked skin.
I straddle him and wrap my arms around his neck, and he smiles and strokes my hip. “Back for a second round already? I’m game, but I’ll need a little more time.”
I press my horns to his. “Dammon, I…” No, Karlach, don’t say it. Don’t tell him what you’re feeling, it’s way too soon. It is too soon, right? It’s too soon to know if this is just lust or if it’s something more, right? Something so much more, so much bigger that it feels like it’s filling my entire damn body… I can’t know yet for sure that this is what I think it is, can I? Fuck, I’m breathing all shaky. Stop it, K, don’t cry again, just don’t.
He strokes my neck — gods, his magical hands on my skin, I can’t get enough. “It’s okay,” he whispers. “Take your time. Talk when you’re ready.”
I nod, and I kiss him. For the dozenth time tonight, I’m kissing Dammon, melting under his soft lips and tasting his tongue and feeling every inch of my skin coming to life under his hands, and I can’t be fucking bothered with talking. Who cares about words or talking or even thinking when there’s this, when there’s him? Not me, that’s for sure. All that matters is being here with Dammon, skin-to-skin with him like all my hottest dreams, and I don’t give a shit about anything else.
Tonight, I’m burning blue for him. And that’s all that fucking matters.
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usaigi · 2 years ago
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Is Matt Murdock Homophobic?
Short answer: Doubt it.
Long answer: I seriously doubt, just because he’s Catholic/was raised in a highly Catholic environment (a Catholic orphanage) doesn’t mean he’s homophobic. Being Catholic does not automatically equal being homophobic. 
And if we’re being completely honest, I won’t consider Matt to be “extremely” Catholic in the way the fandom seems to think about him. Matt attending mass on Sunday, going to confession, and having a relationship with his priest just makes him a churchgoer. Which I guess makes him more devote than a lot of other Catholics but the way some of the fandom talk about him makes it seems like he’s having a crisis of faith every other Tuesday. 
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I've seen this topic come up in fanfiction and in fandom in general so I’d like to offer a liberal queer Catholic perspective on being queer. 
Is being gay a sin in Catholicism?
Having same-sex attraction is not a sin in Catholicism. However, having sex outside of marriage is a sin. And since the church only recognizes heterosexual marriages, it essentially does make being gay a sin. The whole “being gay isn’t a sin but if you act upon it is” which is... ugh.
We are all children of God, and God loves us as we are and for the strength that each of us fights for our dignity. Being homosexual is not a crime. It is not a crime. 'Yes, but it is a sin.' Fine, but first let us distinguish between a sin and a crime. It is not the first time that I speak of homosexuality and of homosexual persons. And I wanted to clarify that it is not a crime, in order to stress that criminalization is neither good nor just. When I said it is a sin, I was simply referring to Catholic moral teaching, which says that every sexual act outside of marriage is a sin. Of course, one must also consider the circumstances, which may decrease or eliminate fault. As you can see, I was repeating something in general. I should have said, 'It is a sin, as is any sexual act outside of marriage.' This is to speak of 'the matter' of sin, but we know well that Catholic morality not only takes into consideration the matter, but also evaluates freedom and intention; and this, for every kind of sin. And I would tell whoever wants to criminalize homosexuality that they are wrong. - Pope Francis 2023
HOWEVER: We have not seen Matt Murdock having religious objections/feel guilty for having premarital sex. Birth control is also not accepted in Catholicism but I seriously doubt Matt’s not wrapping it. I’m sure I don’t need to cite one of the million jokes about him being a manwhore, we all know it. Do we really think Matt would be such a hypocrite to think someone is a sinner for being LGBT when he himself has had how many girlfriends? Not to mention he was also born and raised in New York City and his need for justice is one of his primary character traits. Do you really think Matt learned about the Stonewall Riot(his own city’s history), the AIDs epidemic, the general mistreatment and discrimination of LGBT people and would really support it? BFFR.
Matt Murdock is a lot of things, mainly a self-loathing idiot in desperate need a therapy, but he’s not a bigot. 
I’m going to link this post by the lovely @ceterisparibus116 about Matt’s "religious guilt" and what I think is fandom’s general misunderstanding of Matt’s Catholic guilt. 
What about internalized homophobia?
In my own fics I’ve written Matt as bi/pan (hooking up with Moon Knight) (also that one Ziwe meme) and as a trans guy who pre-transition thought he was a lesbian/sapphic. (If you read it I’ll love you forever). Mattfoggy is the biggest ship in the fandom so it's only normal to have this discussion.
Sure, maybe Matt wouldn’t judge other people for being gay and having sex outside of Catholic-recognized marriage but would he judged himself? How can Matt still consider himself Catholic and queer? 
A misconception I think a lot of people have about Catholicism is that we must all follow the church’s teaching and that everything the Pope says is infallible. Which is silly and simply not true. Pope Benedict XVI once stated that: "The Pope is not an oracle; he is infallible in very rare situations, as we know." Pope John XXIII also once said: "I am only infallible if I speak infallibly but I shall never do that, so I am not infallible." 
First of all, the church is not a monolith institution. Second of all, not all Catholic teaching is infallible, “no church teaching is automatically free from error, because the church is composed of human beings. God alone is a priori free from error in detail and in every case.” (Infallible? An Inquiry by Hans Küng). Very few things are infallible statement. The Immaculate Conception of Mary and the Assumption of Mary are infallible statements. But as far as I know, “being gay is a sin” is not. 
Conscience, actually, takes priority over church teaching. Pope Francis said “that priests must inform Catholic consciences ‘but not replace them.’ And he stressed the distinction between one’s conscience—where God reveals himself—and one’s ego that thinks it can do as it pleases.” (x)
In extolling conscience the Catechism quotes from another Vatican II document Gaudium et Spes. It states: "Deep within his conscience man discovers a law which he has not laid upon himself but which he must obey. “For a man has in his heart a law inscribed by God . . . His conscience is man’s most secret core and his sanctuary,” the document goes on, “There he is alone with God whose voice echoes in his depths.” In summary, it is possible for a good Catholic in good faith to act contrary to the teachings of the church. - Patsy McGarry
If Matt prayed, asked for guidance and his conscience said that being (trans, gay, bi, however you headcanon him) is not sinful, he can, in good faith, oppose the church. And yes, he’d be welcomed to take the Eucharist. Eucharist is not a reward that only the most faithful free-on-sin living saints. It’s a source of healing and for those striving to live in the Gospel.  
In terms of the church, as I said, it’s not a monolith and people can and do disagree in current teaching. Here’s Cardinal McElroy calling for the ‘radical inclusion’ of LGBT, women and others in the Catholic Church. Here’s a letter by 6,000 nuns standing in solidarity with Trans community.
This is just my headcanon, but I don’t think Father Lantom is homophobic. I’d like to think he’s one of the priest calling for reform and acceptance of LGBT people. I also like to think Sister Maggie was one of the nuns that signed that letter. If Matt came to him asking for support, I honestly think Father Lantom would give him that.  
Would everyone in his community accept him? No, probably not and that’s unfortunate. But there are those in the community don’t accept the young single mom or the recovering alcoholic. Religious gatekeeping is a problem and I don’t want to pretend it isn’t, but it’s not the only truth. I dislike the idea that being queer and Catholic are mutually exclusive. Or that Matt would leave his religion for being queer. To be honest, as a queer Catholic I find it pretty disrespectful. I would love to read more fics where Matt realize he’s queer and struggles with it but it’s so incredibly annoying when the fic concludes with Matt leaving his faith. We’re Catholic for God not for a church. There are other queer Catholic Matt could hypothetically find community with. 
And I get it, a lot of people are coming from a place of religious trauma and are writing fanfic to express it. I'm sorry for anyone who was hurt by the church, religion or toxic family. The church has and continues to do a lot of harm, both on the individual and global level. If anyone wants a rant about colonization of Latin America, I’m your girl. I just dislike this black-and-white mindset that Matt is either Catholic or gay.  
If anyone has questions, I can try to answer. I’m not a theology expert, I’m just a virgo and a fanfic writer. 
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b4b3tte · 1 year ago
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Hey, dear. Would you write something about Ken being in love with a curvy girl with low self-esteem? My idea sounds like she's in love with him too, but doesn't show it cause is afraid of rejection. So he would try to kinda "convince" her that he is really interested.
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꒰ ⊹ ˚ Summary — here is Ken confessing his love for the human girl he fell for
Contains of — Insecurities, bad mental health thoughts, confession, etc
Pairing — Gosling!Ken x Female Reader
note — UGH I LOVE when you guys request stuff, it makes me so happy thank you for the request I love it, it’s very unique than my other ones!! I hope you enjoy this and you and your body is gorgeous no matter what <3
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Ken had always been captivated by You, a curvy girl with a heart of gold. The radiant smile could light up a room, but he noticed something more profound beneath your cheerful exterior - a hidden layer of self-doubt that you carried like a heavy burden.
You as well, had secretly admired Ken from afar. His warm personality and the way he made everyone around him feel valued had won your heart, but fear held you back from revealing your true feelings. You couldn’t bear the thought of rejection, so you kept your emotions locked away.
It wasn’t something you did intentionally but something that just came naturally, you always feared of rejection and not being good enough for people, and knowing someone like ken
someone that’s handsome,charming, funny and bright, that made you question your worth and morals more than normal
You always heard of people talking about how Ken is head over heels for you but obviously you never took them seriously because why would you?
People are cruel these days and would do anything to make someone’s day bad, plus you simply thought you were worthy enough to be liked by someone especially someone like Ken
You couldn’t help these thoughts, so you just let them overpower you and become oblivious to kens flirting. Ken really adored you and wanted to impress you ten times more than he “ impressed “ Barbie,
it’s always “ hey y/n watch what I can do “ , “ y/n look at what I made “ , “ hey y/n want to go to the movies later tonight? “
Ken tried all of those things but he never managed to get a reaction out of you, he was genuinely wondering what was he doing wrong, he even started doubting himself but he finally decided he was gonna take this into his own hands
One gloomy afternoon, Ken decided it was time to make a move. He invited you to your favorite coffee shop, where you guys often shared stories and laughs. As you guys sipped their lattes, he mustered the courage to speak his truth.
“Y/n,” Ken began, “there’s something I’ve been wanting to tell you. I’ve admired you for a long time, not just for your beauty, but for the incredible person you are. I feel like you being here has brightened my life, you make me feel respected you put me first and I never thought that would happen. “
Your heart races at the shocking words ken just spoke, you really couldn’t believe he was saying those words to you, as you looked into his eyes, realizing that maybe, just maybe, he felt the same way you did.
Ken continued, “i know we have some things we don’t like of ourselves but I hope you know that I’m really interested in you, for who you are “
Ken always was confident but when it came to you he always choked up and got noticeably flustered, when it came to the part of speaking about your body he definitely hesitated but it just had to come out
“ Your curves are a part of what makes you uniquely beautiful, and I wouldn’t change a thing about you.”
You really wanted to tear up at kens heartfelt words you never had someone feel this way about you, hell you didn’t even feel like this about yourself, so to have someone to say this to you made you genuinely happy.You had never felt so cherished, so accepted for who you truly were.
Over time, Ken’s unwavering support and love helped you gain confidence in yourself . you began to see yourself through his eyes, not as someone with low self-esteem, but as a woman worthy of love and admiration.
Your love story blossomed, built on a foundation of trust, acceptance, and the courage to reveal your guys true feelings. Together, you two proved that love could conquer even the deepest insecurities, and you guys embraced your journey towards self-discovery and mutual adoration
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I Hope you guys enjoyed this, sorry for the rusty grammar and such, I wrote this during class lmao but I hope it’s still good!! Love you guys!! Please request more stuff❤️
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definitely-not-lying · 1 month ago
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Kokichi what's your opinion on the other characters in v3?
Fasten your seatbelts! we're going on a rant about my classmates nishishi~!
Rantaro Amami:
Hmm, Mr. Mysterious, huh? He's always so calm and collected, he’s hiding something, I just know it! But that makes him interesting. I'm curious of what's on his mind all the time. He sounds like a trustworthy person. But that was a lie! Rantaro is also really chill to talk to! :D
Kaede Akamatsu:
I think Kaede is too optimistic for her own good! I mean, over-the-top optimistic. It's a bit annoying... But she can be pretty cool sometimes too, she has some serious talent with that piano! She's a really good leader, but obviously not as good as I am. When she has an idea she is very pushy and I think that's boring.
Ryoma Hoshi:
I don't dislike Ryoma but I also don't like him. It's dissapointing that he finds no meaning in life and doesn't talk alot to others... He's kinda just a boring loner that's impressivly good at tennis. And he's so small! when I first met him I thought he was a little kid nishishishi~ please don't tell him I said that! :|
Kirumi Tojo:
Mooooooom? Just kidding! Hihi~ She's kind of a killjoy. She's always on my case whenever I try to cause some trouble! But Kirumi is also a talented maid. She's got a lot of skills and she's super efficient. I wonder how she always helps others and never spends time for herself!
Angie Yonaga:
The Atua freak? She's a dissapointment. The only thing she does is ramble about this so called Atua! I doubt she can actually make dicisions on herself. She’s always so cheerful and smiley, but that makes her so suspicious!
Tenko Chabashira:
Ugh, she's so annoying! Always going on about 'degenerate males'. But it’s fun to push her buttons! I wish I could tape her mouth shut forever. I should ask her to teach me Neo-Akaido too! Then I could surprise attack her with her own moves and my wish could come true :]
Korekiyo Shinguji:
He's weird... and creepy! "Sister this, Sister that" and his stupid mask... honestly, I don't know how the others put up with him. But as long as he doesn't summon a demon in my room i supposse he's okay.
Miu Iruma:
The itty bitty bitchlet. She's way too vulgar! I kinda respect her for actually being smart, unlike certain people... nishishi. If she wasn't such an annoying pervert she'd be almost interesting. I mean, how can someone with such a huge mouth even function?
Gonta Gokuhara:
The big gentlemen! He's so gullible it's almost boring... but i guess his heart is in the right place. He's also very strong! He could lift me in the air, no problem. It's kinda dissapointing he likes bugs so much. Those are just the worst! :(
Kaito Momota:
Ah, the Ultimate idiot! A wannabe hero who's fun to mess with. He's always so self-centered and calls others his side kick while he doesn't do anything! But I gotta admit, he's got guts! If he wasn't so heroic I think he would be... fine :/
Keebo:
Keeboy! He still didn't answer my question! Now i'll never know if robots really have d!cks :( Anyways, He’s so easy to tease, and he falls for everything. Poor Keebo, too pure for my games! He's fun to talk too and I feel like there is something more to him that we don't know...
Tsumugi Shirogane:
She's plainly boring... I don't like or hate her... heck, I even forget she exists sometimes! It's a bit annoying that she makes alot of fiction references that no one gets... She really is a hardcore loser!
Shuichi Saihara:
Aww, Shumai! The shy, serious detective. He tries so hard to be emotionless, but he’s so easy to fluster! He's one of the few people here who’s actually worth the time of the Ultimate Supreme Leader. I wish he would stand up for himself more often. He'd be way more entertaining then! <3
Maki Harukawa:
Ah, Maki Roll! So cold and serious—makes it even more fun to mess with her! She acts all tough, but deep down, I think she’s just a softie for Kaito. And maybe she’ll just kill me in my sleep... who knows! Either way, I’ll keep poking the bear. It’s more exciting that way, right?
Himiko Yumeno:
She's pretty lazy. And her so called 'magic'? She should come up with something better! But her tricks are very interesting. She once made a tiger cub appear from her hat! :0
If you don't like my opinions, try to change them! I'm not that stubborn but I can't promise anything!
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weliveinapokemonworld · 25 days ago
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Self-indulgent fic based on my headcanons. A bit AU. I projected my musings about Eternatus onto the characters. (Not betaread.)
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Sonia lets Raihan absorb the photographs and document's content. He has his head cradled on his hands, propped up on the table where he stands, as his eyes go wider and wider with each second.
It's such a relatable feeling that she bought several cans of beer: Both for her and for him once he needs something to distract himself. Her first one was open when he entered her home in Wedgehurst, setting the mood as he got an impression how bad her news are.
"Sonia."
"Hmm?"
"Sonia, what the bloody hell?" He sweeps a hand across the papers as if they've personally offended them. Which they might have. The whole deal with the second Darkest Day is bad enough.
Everybody, if they didn't experience their own struggles, knows at least one other person who was affected - injuries from a rampaging wild boltund and a partner slurpuff; secondhand injuries and deaths from the energy grid failing, thus life support failed; homelessness because a giant tail smashed through the street-facing wall or an earthquake destabilized an entire apartment block.
Raihan spent hours evacuating Hammerlocke, and battling along other people to fend off Dynamaxed and Gigantamaxed pokemon. It included several heart-stopping minutes in which his pokemon couldn't Dynamax on their own for some reason.
Once the chaos stopped, his team was left so exhausted they slept for two days at the pokemon center. He would have slept for just as long right after, if not for the need of his help as the current highest ranking League member. Previous leadership either had fled or resigned instantly; the Champion was unconscious in the hospital.
He organized the immediate aftermath: interviews to reassure the public, postponing the Championship match to a later point, reaching out to organisations, etc. etc.
Raihan did collapse onto a couch in the ex-Rose Tower once he believed the worst was over, badly scaring Nessa and Kabu. He was damned lucky he didn't need an extended hospital stay liked Leon.
The consequences could've been worse, but they were and are still bad enough. That's just the most visible of the fucked-up shit that Rose, Oleana, and whoever else in Macro Cosmos was involved got up to.
"Trust me, I've felt the same." Ugh, she's left this can open for too long. Metal clinks as she sets it onto the tray on the side.
"That's- that's a skeleton. They have always been a skeleton, not just a distortion because of Gigantamaxing?"
"I know."
"And you're saying that testing showed a dual Dragon and Poison type?"
"The experts at the institute repeated the tests three times. Victor had to bribe his dragon with a lot of treats to keep going."
"But-!" Raihan throws his arms up. Again, relatable. He inhales deeply. "How does that make sense?! Is that just... their body, how they look like?
"Pokemon biology is weird as bloody hell, and there's tons of exceptions. I'm not an expert. But when a pokemon looks like that, it always has been a Ghost type. Whatever connects the vertebrae looks more like some kind of energy than anything organic."
Raihan has several Dragon types he raised himself. He sounds doubtful for very good reasons.
Sonia opens another can, and the folder she has held back until now, hiding it under a notepad. Tiny droplets spray on the retyped papers. The culmination of this fucked up iceberg and why she needs a drink. Or several. She's held them back because he needed that context first to understand everything else. He's among the many who have the right to know.
"It doesn't explain everything, but I've found a lot of information in Oleana's notes. You are correct but you won't like the why and the how."
He gives her a startled look.
"It gets worse-?"
He drops into the chair next to her as she keeps sipping. "Wait, how am I right?"
"Depends on your definition of 'worse'. Before you say anything, I'm upset about this whole thing, too. But I already had my hours of mixed anger and anxiety. I've simply tired myself out."
He gives her a dubious look. Her and the beer can.
"I guess Hop and Victor also know already then."
"And Leon." Another sip. At least it's good beer when it hasn't gone stale. "Hop was the first to suggest to have the testing done to be certain. Victor supported him when he pushed to dig deeper and got Leon on board with me. All three of them battled Eternatus, after all."
He reluctantly reaches for a can on his own, his face making a complicated expression as he pulls the tab open. But he doesn't take a drink yet. She slides him a coaster over as he reaches for them. "You and Leon are smart. And he does have access now to most of Macro Cosmos' documents." A grimace. "What they didn't manage to destroy or hide, that is."
Sonia considers clarifying that Oleana handed over all of her notes to Leon without hesitation when he asked once she resigned.
Raihan does have a big point. A good point. The company did compile a lot of the information connected to their ill-adviced project and hid them well. Telling anybody that they are?- were?- willing to start an apocalypse like their boss is not a good look.
Trying to destroy incriminating documents is just as bad a look. Leon forwarded what he could find to organisations who are reliable and will use it to help Galar heal.
He couldn't bear to read the information tied directly to Eternatus - including Oleana's handwritten papers, locked away in a drawer in his apartment's office - or anything closely related to the pokemon. The betrayal, the trauma were too big. He had to find a therapist he clicked with and needed several months to pass before Leon folded under the force of two pairs of eyes who begged him to help a few days ago.
It's funny how vehemently the teenagers still deny making any such expressions, when two people witnessed them.
"You are right when you said how strange it is that Eternatus is the typing they are." Pages rustle as she thumbs the folder open, letting them fall until she's found what she's looking for. Raihan leans over to get a better look at the photographs as well as the sketches of the site, then nearly stands up.
"That's Eternatus, right? Or their skull. Where did they find this?"
A sigh leaves Sonia.
"Several potential sites exist that could qualify. Macro Cosmos staff secretly transported every part of Eternatus' skeleton into the basement they were digging under Hammerlocke Castle for the energy plant- This was before your time! Two years before you took over as gym leader, so sit down! You were not at fault for this shit."
He glowers down at the pictures.
"I still can feel betrayed and uncomfortable about how long this has been going. Ugh." He removes his snapback and draws his free fingers through his locs. She doesn't believe that he's not blaming himself. She'll also not say anything, because it would only make matters worse. He loves Hammerlocke and the gym, and he takes his responsibilities seriously. "Fuck, I have to look into the gym's past years. Expenses, money flow, building orders... Worse, if the previous leader knew of this...
"Not that it's matter. It'll reflect badly either way on the whole city if this becomes public. Even if I prove she knew and maybe even received some kind of bribe or was blackmailed into hiding everything. I'm the gym leader now and present in everybody's mind."
Unsaid goes that the public is already facing him with scrutiny because Eternatus was hidden slash trapped under Hammerlocke Castle. She won't say anything. She will wrap an arm around his back as he slumps in his seat and hides his face behind his hand. They stay like this for several seconds. Her grandma's old clock - from Magnolia's own grand-grandfather - ticks away.
Raihan puts his snapback on and straightens. She lets him go and ignores it as he builds up his composure again with a cough.
"Sorry for that. Also, thanks."
"No problem, Raihan." She twirls a lock of her hair around her index. "I wish I had better news, but you have to look at the pictures again."
He does as she asks, grumbling. He pulls out a magnifying glass out of his belt pocket, with a sudden frown. He inspects the fossil - the lightning at the dig site isn't that good. It was probably a chance find, maybe in some mines. But it also makes it easier to spot the same details she's found. He taps on a spot next to what seemed to have been a skull, not yet pressed flat from the pressure of the earth and rock collecting above.
"I see an outline of a body around the bones, which are blue. Not much, but the earth is colored with a slight purple tinge, probably from residual poison." He shifts the magnifying glass. "There's also... some glowing pieces? They look a bit like crystal growing over the bones. Wishing stars? Did they fill in and replace the organic material, like it happens with opal?"
Wordlessly, she flips to the next page. The table rattles as he plants his palms on the surface, shoving his chair behind and over.
"Watch the beer!"
She winces when the chair clatters to the floor, holding both cans securely in her hands. Not that she can blame him fo his reaction. The chair will only need some polish.
"What- is that a hide? Is it breaking into-?!" He brings his face close again, squinting through the glass even though he doesn't need to. This picture shows a close-up of the ribcage, still covered by what seems to be magenta scales and skin, with flesh below. Strange but not unheard of for some species. Their bodies tend to resist the decomposition process better than that of others, among which are often steel types, but also dragon types. These specimen don't care if somebody pokes a rib with the handle of their shovel.
Usually. Usually, they don't crumble and transform upon a slight touch into a different material: glowing crystals and shards. Those were-
"Wishing stars," Raihan says, a hand over his mouth. "The wishing stars didn't crystalize in the gaps of the bones. The bones disintegrated into them."
He looks at her.
"And so did probably more than the bones - hide, flesh, organs, sinews, am I right? Is Eternatus- They don't generate them, or not only. All wishing stars are remains of their body. Why didn't we discover that earlier?"
"For the same reasons Eternatus is likely what they are. Rose's plans were bad enough without the experiments, so everybody hid that part separately."
"They didn't wake up when they were found or after, right? You only mentioned their remains, the bones. Are they a clone?"
"If only-"
"Sonia, stop beating up the bush for the sake of my nerves, please. I'm already on edge, and you're driving my anxiety higher and higher."
Raihan- Oh. He's not- Yeah, he's looking tense, expression too flat. One hand is clenched into fist, lying on the table and subtly shaking. She stares down at the cans she's still holding. Did she delay that much? Her eyes flit to the clock. It's later than she's thought - it shouldn't have taken this long to bring him up-to-date-about everything. Carefully she puts the beverages onto to the tray next to the empty one. She didn't realize-
The pit from before threatens to open in her stomach again. Looking at the beer now makes her feel ill. She might not have tired herself out from the shock as much as she's thought.
"Okay- No, not okay, you're right. I've been stalling and making you worry." She pats her cheeks twice, focusing. It doesn't do anything against the tension in her stomach, but fake it till you make it, right?
"Please just humor me for moment. You might figure out yourself first. Do you know of Cara Liss?"
"Scientist specializing in fossil species revival. Developed a revolutionary new approach that minimizes the impact of fossilisation, thus minimizing changes in the DNA that shift typing to Rock. It also works on whole fossils rather than making modified clones. Other scienstists as well as investors refused to take her seriously because of her age and gender. She never got opportunities, so she could never could show what she could do. A downward spiral." He taps on his fingers to stress each point, frowning harder with each second.
"She got frustrated at the unfairness, and took matters into her hands, in a bad way.
"Currently facing charges of alleged fraud, selling made-up information that could cause harm to other pokemon, and proven abuse of the pokemon she created. Galar doesn't tend to have many complete fossils or big ones. She mashed two different species together who would make one whole body, to have an impressive proof of concept. Never mind that those pokemon face chronic health issues because their body parts are incompatible with each other."
Raihan's last words hang in the air as he trails off. More seconds pass. Turning around, he pulls up the chair and sits down in reverse direction, elbows leaning on the backseat. Slowly, dramatically, he slaps a hand over his eyes.
"What the fuck." He groans. "What the fuuuuuuuuck..."
She can't help it. She snorts, loudly. "Relatable. You sound like I did a few hours ago."
"Don't you quip at me, Professor Sonia." Brown eyes peek out between the gap of his index and middle finger. "Is that what other regions had to deal with when they made the news because of domestic terrorism and their own near catastrophes? Did those include instances of unethical scientists experimenting on powerful pokemon?"
She can only shrug, although she's wondered about that, too. It feels like somebody, somewhere, is laughing at them.
"Maybe? Not that I'm going to ask. I don't know how to explain how our former League Chairman and his former Vice President at Macro Cosmos both failed so badly at their plan to revive Eternatus and succeeded at the same time. If I even should explain. This is dangerous information."
"So, they did- What, exactly? Did they stuff the bones into that big sphere to stop them from disintegrating further? And adapt Liss' method to work on fragile not-fossils?"
She rubs her temple.
"Not quite. Some of the workers found their Dynamax bands depleted within minutes whenever they were around the bones. This happened roughly about the same time Oleana figured out from new data that the energy supply would run dry in a decade rather than in a millenium like others had calculated.
"Rose put two and two together that the bones passively absorbed the energy from wishing stars. She theorized that they could reconstruct a larger part of Eternatus if they'd immerse their skeleton in hundreds of them. It'd allow them to revive the dragon as close as they could get to what Eternatus used to be, using both known methods."
"But they failed to consider just how damn powerful the dragon is, right? Either process has been streamlined in the last years, but both still need large amounts of energy to just bring back an omanyte. Isn't Eternatus even bigger than the largest recorded wailord?"
"I'll look it up when my brain isn't leaking out my ears. And yeah. They've theorized that they didn't have enough energy, too, but didn't come to a clear conclusion. We can't know."
It's the most vexing puzzle. Several pieces are missing. And the gaps between what they have is so big that they can't rely on guesswork what used to be in-between.
"We have to little information about what happened when Eternatus started the first Darkest Day, why they did it, and how and when they died except that the Wolves were likely involved. On top of that. People back then thought everybody knew what happened because it affected the entire region. Why should they need to record it in any way?"
The pitfalls of history research - how do you reconstruct events when the surviving physical objects are not enough? Sonia feels like putting her head on the table. The table cloth rubs against her forehead. Raihan won't mind. It's not the first time either of them were around for the other to just be done with the current bullshit and show it.
"Point is. They brought them back, but not even close to complete. You were right about the vertebrae. Dyna- Um, their own energy is running through their middles like spinal marrow? It forms discs, although I have no idea yet if they're cushioning the vertebrae or just separating them. It's also forming their brain and eyes, somehow."
"... So, they're actually a ghost? They didn't adapt like the dreepy line to survive?"
"Leon asked the same question. It distraught him so much that his own dreepy swarmed him to comfort him."
More seriously, she continues, "Again, we know too little. I don't know why they died, didn't form a ghost when they were so powerful, but now have come back. Or maybe this isn't the ghost of the original pokemon, but rather an echo with their own personality left in the bones."
She pulls her ponytail to the side so she can lay her head on her cheek to face him. He seems like he's having a crisis, mouth dropped open. Probably at the idea that such a powerful Dragon type returned as a ghost, in pain after being awakened so abruptly and incompletely. It's the stuff of legends- and horror stories about the vengeful death. It nearly became true.
"Hop has a hypothesis that Dragon and Poison were their original typings. Death came so quickly that they were not aware of it. It didn't affect whatever more esoteric causes affect typings.
"Sounds as possible as other hypothesis there could be at the moment." Raihan's voice is tight. His shoulders tense up. He stretches those and his arms backwards, groaning with pain. His mouth pinches as he rubs a spot on the back of his neck. "Say. Would it be okay if I stay for a while? This was a lot. I don't wanna travel all the way back to Hammerlocke alone, yet."
"Of course, you can! I was the one who dumped all of that on you!" She would've asked if he didn't. She worries about him after dropping that bomb onto him and will feel better, knowing that she can support him if he should need in the few hours. She has dragged up painful, still too fresh memories. What an awful host she is! She hasn't even offered him snacks to the beer.
She shoves away from the table to stand up. "Would you like-"
His stomach growls; her own follows in sympathy, apparently having overcome - or forgotten - her nausea. She pats it, which earns her a snort and a smirk. It's not quite truthful yet, but it is amused.
"-Something to eat? If you're offering to cook, I'll accept gladly."
"Sorry, not sorry, I don't have the energy. I do have a large pot of pumpkin soup left from yesterday that we can heat up." Oh dear Sword and Shield, it sounds tasty when she just says it. Her stomach growls again. He follows her into the kitchen, playfully needling her.
"But your cooking is so good! You could whip up something extra to go with the soup."
"The only thing I'll whip is some unsweetened cream to top it." Sonia hands him the cutting board she's fetched from the counter. "You can cut that loaf into nice slices, about an inch each. We're going to toast them, add some butter, rub some garlic across, and add whichever herbs we like from Gran's garden. We're going to eat that with the soup and talk in front of the telly to get our minds off of this clusterfuck for now. Sounds good?"
She's getting hungrier with each word she says. Raihan is probably not better off. His eyes take on a dreamy quality he gets whenever when he's around and invited to when she cooks. He shakes his daydreaming off with a cheeky salute.
"An autumn meal made by yours truly for the afternoon? Sounds good!"
The tension does not dissipate as much as it drops to a lower level? She's too experienced in the kitchen to need her entire focus on whipping the cream. Her arm goes through the motions automatically. She knows herself enough to anticipate a potential spell of insomnia this night once the distractions have stopped.
With some distance and having talked about the whole topic again? It ties so easily back to the consequences of the second Darkest Day and the event itself. What does it say about Rose and his allies who were involved that she has to make a disctinction which one it was? Did he ever even consider just at what risks he put Galar and the region's people? What were his plans if Eternatus had managed to kill people directly, like they nearly did Leon? Or Hop or Victor? Or Raihan as the next potential line of def-
No. No. She shakes her head and resumes whipping. She'll only drive herself to the brink of an anxiety breakdown if she pursues horrible "What Ifs" that didn't happen.
She has a machine for big amounts of batter and eye whites. But doing it by hand just makes them taste better. The sames goes for cream. She might have made a bit too much, even. Oh well, she can add some plums to the rest, a bit of sugar, and have dessert, too. The familiar movement soothes her, making it easy to be aware of the kitchen, her friend, and the sound of the knife as he meticulously cuts through the bread, slice for slice. She removes whisk from the bowl and drops it into the taller one she used this morning for her scrambled eggs.
"Hey Raihan," she calls over her shoulder. He pauses for a moment. He might not be the best cook in their friend group, but he always remembers his kitchen safety. "Do you have any appointments in this evening or tomorrow morning? I'd like your company and not be alone today if you'd like to stay longer, too. I have still one of your overnight bags in the closet."
"Nope, not anything I remember. Rotom, if you would?"
Rotom flies out of his back-pocket, unfolding the phone. "You are correct, sir. You have no appointments until the day after tomorrow."
"Then I can stay! Lucky you to be graced with the presence of the Great Raihan, huh?" What. What in the Sword and Shield. Did he just wraggle his eyebrows at her? What a dork.
"I'd say you're the lucky one because you love my cooking so much. Oh, how much mature, sticking your tongue at me."
And because she's just as mature, she does the same. Raihan sticks his tongue out again, she retaliates, which makes him retaliate in turn. They continue like this for some more rounds, her grin growing larger and more uncontrollable, until he breaks. Yes, he does laugh first, not Sonia as he later will claim.
"Let's just say we're both lucky, okay? Before we start again." He giggles faintly, leaning against the cupboard. His long arms, stretched back, prop him from where they grab the counter's edge.
"Yes, please let's do that."
He had the good sense to put the knife down on the top and a foot away from him. Sonia cannot claim such foresight, but at least she didn't drop the bowl? Or spilled the cream? She puts the bowl down and ducks to a drawer for the spatula, holding onto her own giggles. She has to remember her own kitchen safety. But. Raihan is right, she thinks, as she watches his grin remain when he fetches the knife again. With his head mostly turned, he can't know that she's looking. At least in this moment, the two of them are probably very lucky.
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