#Towe defense

[oldguydoesstuff]

Missile Command, the OG Tower Defense game.

[gameideas-111]

Defend the Tower idea

What if you had a 3d platform and tower defense game. Where you could place down structures and use class powers. The target is to keep your structure from being drained by a pack of creatures, with certain creatures to spice up the combat and enemy count.

Maybe there can even be a mechanic similar to Salmon Run in the platoon games. With the core game being most similar to Dungeon Defenders. Maybe you can charge the item you're guarding with the fuel of those you kill, with transporting a resource back to recharge the item you're guarding possibly being part of the game. Maybe there are some elements from Planet Engineer, like one class having conveyor belts, another a catapult, another a collector, and the last one a small collector who helps collect these resources.

Player elements: These elements would also swap out the element being used.

Fire: Makes towers use fire attacks (And by extension, having lingering damage over time from the fire), and increases player damage. While taking more damage from frost

Frost: Having the towers do frost damage (And applying the freezing effect that slows down enemies hit with it to all the players and towers' attacks) and granting the player more defense. While taking more damage from thunder.

Thunder: Chain damage and range towers (and lets the player deal thunder damage), and increases the player's speed. while taking more damage from earth.

Earth: Increases the health of all structures built by this player, and lets them heal next to any player structure. while taking more damage from fire.

Player Classes: The classes that would be in the game (This will also use their bass elements without modifications).

Worrier (Fire): Mellay based and focused on clearing things. Having three charge-up powers to choose from. The first ability charges quickly and effectively and gives you a grenade that explodes on a large area, the second option is a barrel you can through like Donky Cawn that barrels down a lain leaving a trail of elemental energy that will explode at the end of its path, the last one taking the longest to charge and acts as a massive damage boost to you. increasing your difference and damage.

their structure is a catapult that can through the items players collect somewhere else. like onto a conveyor belt or a storage bin, maybe even one of the wizard's sprites (Sprites, catapults, and could even load these things with the resource, or maybe unload it like heroes depending on the item).

Wizard (Frost): Largly floaty and seen to jump around. They have a constant attack. With you being able to choose from three major abilities. The first ability is the ability to pick from a massive elemental power shot. The next option is to cause an elemental storm that points in a cone and deals its damage. The last option is to call upon elemental birds that circle around an area and attack creatures with the lowest health, when that creature dies they move on to the next enemy, they leave at the end of a timer.

The mage can also summon a little helper to collect resources automatically in an area as long as their node isn't destroyed. They can act with anything the players can interact with. Their next special structure is a tower that lays out a small damage of your element over a large area. Others will be landmines. low cost, low expectations. it explodes and gets destroyed.

Engineer (Thunder): quick and largely focused on supporting structures. With their bass structure having the ability to boost structures around it also tends to be the second fastest class. The first option for chargeable ability is overcharge, which lets them overcharge all structures in the area, increasing their attack speed and damage to the structure. The next option lets you cause all your structures to heal other structures near them. The last option is to launch a massive rocket that deals a large amount of damage.

They can make conveyor belts, wich have a limited amount you can place. anything put on these conveyor belts will be carried along. Though, these things will destroyed.

Scout (Earth): The most agile class and often sneaking around, able to throw powers and ability to fix structures and heal allies. While also primarily being a ranged archer. Their low-cost ability lets them do an AOE healing effect, next an enhancement shot that causes an explosion-based attack. The last charge action would be an ability that heals and increases the charge of all other players around them.

The Scout can place a structure that has a storage capacity that hooks up to other player structures to create storage items to not overwhelm machines.

Enemy Modifiers

Armored: Making enemies slower, but take less damage.

Healer: Able to heal the Hp of enemies near this one.

Besurk: when an enemy hits half health, they gain double damage and can run quicker.

leading role: These creatures can initiate a charge, they can do this operatically.

Fire Touched: Takes less damage from fire, and deals fire damage. While taking more damage from frost

Thunder Touched: Takes less damage from thunder, and deals thunder damage. While taking more damage from earth

Frost Touched: takes less damage from frost, and deals frost damage. While taking more damage from Thunder.

Earth Touched: Takes less damage from Earth, and deals earth damage. while taking more damage from fire.

Enemy Ideas

Sprigin: The basic small enemy that comes in bulk and swarms quickly. Alongside having the ability to be thrown by larger enemies.

Hog Ridder sprigin: A Sprigen riding a hog as their mighty stead. They are always charging and deal more damage than other goblins. often dealing double damage to those they charge into.

Back-Packer sprigin: A small Sprigin creature who carries a backpack of explosives that when killed, explodes. But if they get to a target or an obstacle, they'll set up the explosives, scream to make all the other enemies back away from the explosives, and run away themselves becoming a regular goblin before the explosion goes off, dealing a hefty amount of damage to the structure.

Gremlin: Small magic user of minimal skill, often acting as a range unit and saboteur of towers. Frequently having skills to jump around and over places with some invisibility power.

Archer: A range unit that sicks in the back and attacks with a bow. They are primarily there to apply cover and range support for allies. If attacked up close, they do have a danger and smock bomb they can use at close range, but will often just try and find a better position.

Skeleton: A Skeleton that unless attacked in its shattered state after being attacked, will reform at half health. They can also consolidate their bones during this process to regain health, at the cost of merging.

Rough: Quick and swift. With an invisibility tactic to try and sneak up on the back line of the defenders to deal massive damage to them then run away. If they can't reach their target. They'll act as shorter-range archers that deal more damage. After three shots, they'll run away to another position.

specter: Strange beings who hover over obstacles and tackless damage from physical sources. but normal damage from magic. They also tend to lift and farry over creatures across gaps and over obstacles sometimes.

Shield Mage: A sorcerer who weald powers over frost magic, they often boost the occasionally providing cover fire over their allies and wield a shield for their own protect. With a larger health pool than your average goblin.

Sword Mage: boosting the attacks and ferocity of the other enemies around it. Alongside using the powers of fire. It also often provides a more aggressive and wielding a sword and staff to make lunge attacks and fire beverages.

Lance Mage: a mage with powers over thunder magic. They specialize in making enemies go quicker in charges, and chain damage through their spell. Welding a lance to help with this.

Staff Mage: a mage with power over Radiant magic. They increase a constant area of effect that hurts those who aren't their allies. With them also specializing in healing their allies slowly while in their damage ora.

troll: Tocken big enemy, often seen as a slugger and minny boss (They also have one hell of a throwing arm). They are powerful physical targets.

Grand Serpent: Another big enemy that acts as a mini-boss, and is long and speeds up the enemies by its long body, alongside them trying to eat smaller enemies to regain hp. They also can do quick dashes and charge quickly as an attack.

Swooper: Flying enemies who specialize in being low health high traversal areas. Able to steal resources or attack structures. possibly even sporadically carrying small enemies so that when they're shot down, they drop the enemy above where they fell. They also do swoop attacks, hence the name.

Huntsmen: A Boss who actively hunts a specific player, and puts down their own traps. mines, enemy cages, and some boost enemies. they have quick attacks and are quicker than most other bosses. All while having some of the lowest health of any boss.

Grand Mage: A powerful boss of the raid who holds a shield and a spear. Flinging one of six elements. Fire, ice, thunder, and radiant. Who specializes in throwing smaller enemies with their magic, launching long-range attacks, causing a damaging AOE, increasing speed for charges, or summoning smaller creatures. They also hover above the ground, and make it over gaps the enemy normally can't.

Dark knight: Another boss that is powerful and does double damage to structures, causes charges for all enemies, and increases their damage. With a special attack to cause other creatures to rush to his Aid and come to his position. He can even deal more damage to the one who dealt the most damage to him.

Day Screacher: A boss who can fly and chuck small and medium creatures around while flying around and frequently swooping around them. With screech ability for range abilities, and a chance to dodge attacks before making a swoop.

[dykedvonte]

I think a big misunderstanding is the power people give Curly to actually change things about the way the pony express operates or could’ve done things on the Tulpar.

We are talking about a company that docks pay for bad synergy despite mandated psych evals that should tell which staff members would work well together, only allots for 5 hours of sleep despite having literally no other tasks to truly do and locks all resources behind the access of one person. The last one is likely to manage resources and make it easier to justify collective punishment and blaming one person for it; someone needs something in “excess” or the captain gives in? It’s all on them your pay is docked. Instant resentment.

It’s insidious how the company works, it’s by design to distract you from coming after them, to force tensions to line their own pockets. With all the restrictions and forced interactions, altercations are bound to happen. 5 hours of sleep a day, limited sources of entertainment, no real tasks… the monotony alone would cause bad cabin fever, mix that with just only one absolute mediator and you get the exact environment that allows shit like in the game to happen.

The idea he could just complain and try to throw his weight around to get them to dig into their pocket for the crews comfort is laughable and misses the predatory and dehumanizing aspect of capitalism the Pony Express represents. Curly was and is still just another asset to them. Being a top show pony doesn’t mean he’s anywhere close to the actual top. He is the top of the working ladder, not whoever’s in corporate, he wouldn’t even be on the bottom step unlike what Jimmy perceives. The resounding recommendations he would get are almost mocking as they throw him out like nothing just like the rest. Being a shitty fucking company, how much do you bet they’d mean anything anyways, especially since he wanted to leave the field all together.

He made a fuss and they didn’t listen, he says he should’ve done more but you can tell he knows it wouldn’t have changed anything. Jobs like this are willing to make a sacrifice if it means even a penny more. Curly makes a bigger fuss they likely would’ve just found an “unrelated” reason to fire him, hired a more pliable guy or, terrifyingly, promoted Jimmy. The company was failing, going to shut down whether anything happened on the ship or not. But knowing that they were shutting down and that everyone, including him, would be out of a job with this being their last paycheck, he had to factor in not destroying the last bit of their financial stabilities combined with every other issue on the vessel and his own. He gets another cryopod or locks and then he has to break to them that they are not only fired but there will be substantial cuts to their paychecks due to the “upgrades” (things that already should’ve been in place on their part) on top of anything else that could be docked along the way.

You can blame him for saying it so early into the trip but then again, if he mentioned it later who’s to say it wouldn’t have been worse? On the capitalism side alone how would people in a galaxy away from home, out of a job and already stir crazy react? Don’t get me started on how Jimmy would have reacted if he realized he only had two days left to fix what would be a very hard to miss “problem” in his head…

I can’t even consider explaining this as devils advocate because it’s just facts of the world we and they live in and factors that heavily affected the situation. People are just so quick to make claims on the ease of the choices when P.E literally makes it hard to choose to do anything but suck it up.

[petrichormore]

God q!BBH is fascinating. His paranoia especially. q!Bad has called himself paranoid in character btw. multiple times. but the one example that immediately comes to mind is when he was talking to q!Aypierre. When people call him paranoid he doesn’t really say “Nuh uh” (at least not seriously - he’s become a little more self-aware) he says “okay maybe I am, maybe I’m not. but don’t you understand why?”

for q!BBH the price of potentially overreacting and hurting his friends’ feelings with his lack of trust is significantly outweighed by the price of an egg fucking dying because he decided to relax. He has been the deciding factor in a life-or-death situation for an egg multiple times. And his overreactions have saved lives. Obviously his developing belief that he’s like the Lone Responsible Caretaker of the Eggs is like blatantly incorrect but it didn’t come into existence in a void. It isn’t just one of his inventions it’s a consequence of other parents putting (whether purposely or accidentally) a lot of pressure on him that he tried and failed to escape from.

So he doesn’t care if he’s paranoid, he doesn’t care if his distrust hurts people, he doesn’t care about what’s reasonable or not - he cares about the eggs being alive. And if being unreasonable has kept the eggs alive in the past then damn you better believe he’s only going to get more unreasonable. And he’s not going to be sorry about it either, not while he feels responsible for every single child on the island.

[awesome-casuallyfamouscollector]

Destroyed Russian Ural-4320 military truck and 122mm 2A18 D-30 towed howitzer, Luhansk region, Ukraine, August 5, 2023. Source: Naalsio26

P.S. By the 533rd day of the war, the Russian army has lost 5028 (+15 during the last day) cannons in Ukraine. Yes, they are cheap, and in most cases obsolete, but along with the destroyed guns are killed their their crews, destroyed trucks, ammunition stores and counterbattery radars...

[true-blue-sonic]

I think worse than Silver finding it hard to catch his dozen of friends in free fall is Silver not getting the emerald from Zor easy and justifying by saying the "I can't be this accurate" bullshit

Oh right, he can't be that accurate, it's not like it was any easier than grabbing wreckage from everywhere around while flying in super speeds to keep up with Sonic, it's not like it was any easier than keep the same speed as Sonic, hold wreckage above him and then slam the wreckage like giant hammers in attempt to hit Sonic. He can't hold Zor in place either because a zeti is far stronger than what our uwu cinamon roll boy 🥺 can hold

Sorry by the "fans don't look" moment hehe

To be quite honest, I truly have no idea what to make of Silver's power level in IDW anymore... except the fact that he's 100% just a lot weaker than in the games and Sonic Channel😅 And I do also feel that even within IDW itself, he's simply not consistent in how strong he is. Though, I would say that links back more to the fact the plot is driving what is happening, and not the characters themselves. Silver obviously could not get eaten alive by the Giant Chopper, so he is able to defeat it after a bit of a struggle while looking none the worse for wear in the aftermath. But holding like five gardening tools simultaneously or catching Duo when he falls down one meter is too much, because it needs to be too much to continue on with the things that come afterwards (him falling to the ground so Blaze can help him up in a Cute Moment; everybody believing he terribly hurt Duo so nobody would see through Mimic's deceit despite the much more severe fight that had happened between Whisper and Lanolin one room over that everybody just... stood around for). So... yeah. Power level as the plot demands it, I guess? I'm always glad to see Silver do the far more powerful things that we know he is very well capable of in the games and Sonic Channel. Ranging from casually catching a giant meteor and throwing it back at basically a god without breaking a sweat, to his entire boss battle in Generations, to him telekinetically holding up a bridge that is noted to weigh multiple tons, to him stopping the beam of the Eclipse Canon that was about to level an entire city with his shield of light: Silver is very, very powerful, to a frightening extent.

[techdriveplay]

How to Tow a Trailer Safely

Towing a trailer can be an essential skill, whether you’re transporting a boat for a weekend getaway, moving furniture across town, or embarking on a cross-country road trip with a camper. However, it’s not as simple as hitching the trailer and hitting the road. Understanding how to tow a trailer safely is crucial for protecting not only your cargo but also yourself, your passengers, and everyone…

[superdorkcat]

Upcoming Magical Girl Projects

Magical girl fans are finally eating good after years of starvation. So good, in fact, that I decided to make a list of magical girl projects in development.

The Magical Girl and the Evil Lieutenant Used to Be Archenemies - The most imminent of these projects, since it's premiering only in a few days. It's the story of the forbidden romance between the magical girl Byakuya Mimori and Mira, a high-ranking official of an army trying to take over the world.

Mermaid Magic - In a new western magical girl show from the same studio as Winx Club, Princess Merlinda, with her friends Sasha and Nerissa in tow, ventures to the human world in order to find a way to save her homeland of Mertropia from the ghost pirate Barbarossa and his monster horde. Dropping on Netflix next month.

Acro Trip - One of several new magical girl series coming out in the Fall 2024 anime season, Acro Trip follows Chizuko Date as her efforts to increase appreciation for her idol, local magical girl Berry Blossom, takes her down a "dark path filled with strange folks."

Magilumiere Magical Girls Inc. - Kana Sakuragi is having a hard time finding work, botching over 15 different job interviews. However, her luck changes when a series of events lands her a job at the magical girl company Magilumiere.

The Story of the Girl Who Couldn't Become a Wizard - The third of the magical girl anime coming out in October, MahoNare for short tells the story of Kurumi Mirai as she tries to become a wizard anyways after failing to get into her school's magic division.

Puella Magi Madoka Magica the Movie - Walpurgisnacht Rising - The fourth PMMM movie, which will pick up where Rebellion's massive cliffhanger left off. It's currently set to come out sometime later this year.

Cute High Earth Defense Club Eternal Love! - The magical boy series is getting a new movie in winter 2025 as part of the celebrations for its 10th anniversary. While the movie will "consist entirely of new scenes that will be newly drawn," exact plot details are unknown. (Added August 7, 2024)

Mahou Tsukai Precure: Mirai Days - A new installment in the Precure franchise, Mirai Days will serve as a sequel to Mahou Tsukai, the thirteenth season. Even though it's premiering early next year, specific plot details are currently unknown.

Princess Session Orchestra - A TV original coming next year, Princess Session Orchestra is based on a concept by Akifumi Kaneko, one of Symphogear's co-creators. The land of Alicepia's peace is destroyed when monsters called Jammerwocks attack, prompting a trio of young girls to step up the plate to protect the realm.

Winx Club - The western magical girl classic is getting a CGI reboot. While comments by Iginio Straffi imply that certain characters who were introduced later in the original series (such as Roxy and Nabu) will appear earlier, no specific plot details have been revealed so far. The series is coming to Netflix late next year.

New Panty & Stocking with Garterbelt - Panty & Stocking is getting a second season after over a decade that's coming out sometime next year with no specific plot details revealed yet. (Added August 7, 2024)

Project Symphogear Next - A new Symphogear movie was announced late last year. However, no further details have been revealed.

Hua Xianzi: Zhi Mofa Xiang Dui Lun - A co-production between Tencent Video and Toei Animation's Shanghai branch, this anime is being billed as a "remake" of Lunlun the Flower Fairy. That being said, promises of "a fresh story and characters" make it sound more like a reboot.

Studio Pierrot's new anime - Studio Pierrot, which has made a variety of magical girl anime from Creamy Mami to Tokyo Mew Mew, has announced that they're creating a new TV original magical girl anime. No specific details have been disclosed, but the caption for the teaser image ("I want you to sing once more...") implies that it'll be a magical idol anime.

Lolirock season three - After Lolirock's second season ended with a cliffhanger all the way back in 2017, it seemed like the story would never get a proper conclusion. However, the series's creator and director, Jean-Louis Vandestoc, announced on his Instagram in 2023 that creative meetings for a third season have begun.

Magic Knight Rayearth revival - TMS Entertainment is making a new Magic Knight Rayearth anime in honor of the franchise's 30th anniversary. Unfortunately, it's currently unknown what the format will be.

Cardcaptor Sakura: Clear Card season two - The sequel to the magical girl classic is getting a second season that will adapt the rest of the manga.

Magical Girl holoWitches - A multimedia project starring six VTubers as fictionalized versions of themselves who work as both streamers and magical girls who save people when they get trapped in the magical Holocas World. There was a four minute extended trailer in May, but the anime's proper premiere date is unknown.

Ojamajo Doremi 16-20's - An adaptation of Ojamajo Doremi's light novel sequel series, which follows the girls as they grow from being in their mid-teens to early 20s. Interestingly, the format for the adaptation (TV show, movie, or streaming series) will be based on the reception of a music video featuring the girls as adults.

[jinwoosbabyboo]

The School is Calling

You got a call about your kid(s) fighting at school ... this can't be good .... or is it? [Requested by: Anon]

Zayne

Principal: Your child got into a fight during lunch

MC: who started the fight?

Principal: That's not important the important thing is your daughter brutally beat up another child

Zayne: What was the fight about?

Principal: Another child took her fruit cup

MC: Is this the same kid who put slime in her hair two days ago?

Principal: Yes but-

Zayne: Is this the same kid who's been taking her notebooks for the last two weeks

Principal: well you see-

Zayne: This sounds like a case of bullying and it seems as though you and your staff have done little to discipline a student who has been bullying our daughter

Principal: I assure you we have a strict no bullying poli-

Zayne: It's not strict enough.

The principals lips snap shut.

Zayne: Now violence is not the answer, but this sounds like a case of self-defense you along with your staff need to handle the bullying problem you have in this school

Principal: ....

Zayne: Are we done here?

Principal: Yes we're done here sir sorry to bother you two

MC: Don't be sorry be better

Rafayel

Principal: Your children got into a fight during recess

Rafayel: Damn *turns to his kids* did you two win?

Your children rapidly nod with big smiles on their faces.

Rafayel: Hell yea! up top!

Principal: Sir this is not a good thing

Rafayel: Did they start it?

Principal: Well no

Rafayel: So they finished it?

Principal: Sir

Rafayel: Good talk ... tell your students to leave my kids alone now if we're done here im taking them to get ice cream

Rafayel walks outside with the twins in tow and finds you leaning against the hood of the car.

MC: So?

Rafayel: They didn't start it they finished it and they won

MC: That's what I like to hear ... Ice cream?

Rafayel & the twins: ICE CREAM !

Xavier

Principal: Your child got into a fight during P.E.

MC: Who started it?

Principal: That's not important here

Xavier: Answer the question.

Principal: ........The other kid shoved your child into the wall

Xavier: Which explains the bruise on his elbow

Principal: Your child then proceeded to punch the other kid in the mouth knocking his tooth out

Xavier: Sounds like self defense

Principal: Your son busted that kids lip sir

MC: Maybe that kid should've kept his hands off our son

Principal: We can't have your son fighting it goes against everything we stand for

Xavier: My son has told you and your staff multiple times this kid was being mean to him and you've done nothing

Principal: We've done everything we can

Xavier: No you haven't you let it slide until he stood up for himself and showed that kid that his actions have consequences we're done here

Sylus

MC: I just got a call from the school, but I won't be able to make it up there in time Sylus: I'll go I'm not busy MC: Okay let me know how it goes

Principal: Im sorry to inform you that we're going to have to suspend your daughter

Sylus: Why.

Principal: She tied up a student and stuffed him in a locker

Sylus: Why.

Principal:*mumbling* He .... He ripped one of her braids out

Sylus: Speak up.

Principal: Another student pulled her hair and removed a braid by accident

Sylus: If I do recall my daughter has reported this kid pulling her hair multiple times

Principal: Yes but we can't have her fighting

Sylus: She didn't fight .... she overpowered him and showed their difference in strength

Principal: but-

Sylus: You're lucky she doesn't like picking on the weak ... don't bother me or her mother with these trivial matters again ... lets go little dove

MC: How did it go? Sylus: Just a friendly chat nothing serious MC: What did she do? Sylus: Made me proud

[mariasont]

They Think I'm Pregnant - A.H

a/n: i feel like this is kind of shitty but alas here we are!

masterlist

pairings: aaron hotchner x fem!reader

summary: the team thinks you're pregnant and you decide to have a little fun with it

warnings: reader is not preggers promise!, honestly the team gossiping is so lol, suggestive content per usual

wc: 1.3k

"I mean she has been kind of moody lately."

The gasp that rose in your surprise was quickly smothered as you pressed yourself against the wall, pushing into it as if that would make you invisible somehow.

"Well, interestingly enough, there has been considerable growth in her chest area. It's due to elevated levels of estrogen and progesterone, which I've noticed with her." Spencer stopped abruptly, the sound of Morgan's muffled laughter in the background. "I'm not saying I make a habit of such observations. Okay, um, don't tell Hotch I said that."

Casting a skeptical eye down your shirt, your frown deepened. Sure, your boobs had grown, but that was a testament to a little happy relationship weight, not the fodder of their theories. 

"Nice one, kid," came Rossi's voice, and you could almost see the smirk on his face.

"Oh my gosh, guys, this is like, the best news ever! A mini-agent in the making! Can you imagine how cute she's going to be? I'm going to get her the cutest  outfits!"

"Garcia, how do you know it's going to be a girl? Did the baby send you a text?"

The baby? Was rational thought absent among them? It must be. You crossed your arms defensively.

"Okay, maybe we should pump the breaks everyone. Why do we even think she's pregnant in the first place?"

JJ—your voice of reason. You could kiss the ground she walked on.

"I'm just putting two and two together. She walked out, and there was a pregnancy test in the trash that wasn't there before."

Your eyebrows drew down, and the increasing shuffle from the room prompted you to make a beeline for Hotch's office before anyone saw you snooping. But in your defense, Emily snooped first.

The moment the door clicked shut, you lunged for the blinds, bypassing any attempt at a greeting with Aaron. The blinds clattered shut, so fast you nearly gave yourself whiplash.

"Honey, what are you—?"

His words hung unfinished as you whirled around, pressing your pointer finger to your lips as if he were a kindergartner about to walk down the hall.

"They think I'm pregnant!" you hissed indignantly, jabbing a finger toward the door as if it were a portal to the rumor mill itself.

His face drained of color as his eyes darted from your face, down to your stomach, and finally rested on your tits. "Are you?"

You slapped his shoulder. "No!"

"Then why do they think that?"

You recounted every piece of evidence  they had collected, giving special attention to Spencer's bodily hypothesis as a subtle form of retaliation.

"He said what?"

You laughed, draping your arms around his neck as you made yourself at home on his lap. He leaned back in his chair, arranging you so your legs were stretched out across his lap.

"Focus," you said desperately. "They think I'm pregnant."

"Sweetheart," he chuckled, his hands finding their way to your waist. "Does it really matter what they're assuming?"

Your lower lip jutted out, fingers threading through your hair as you mulled it over.

"You're a genius." Your arms were around him in an instant once again, leaving a big, messy kiss on his cheek as you hopped down from his lap and strode towards the door.

Who cares if that's what they think?

So, you devoted your day to your greatest talent: stirring the pot. If they were set on believing you were pregnant, why should you interfere? Better yet, why not enjoy their theories and have some fun along the way?

You pulled every trick in the book.

In the morning, you bolted from the briefing room with a hand clamped over your mouth, you later reappeared, ginger ale and crackers in tow--which you knew JJ would understand. No one said a word.

In the afternoon, you turned up your nose when Emily offered you coffee, which in turn caused her eyes to bulge out of her head, but still she said nothing.

In the evening, you staged a sudden craving for the strangest of snacks, convincing Spencer of your dire need for pickles dipped in peanut butter. You sent him on a wild goose chase for it, and he did it, no questions asked.

All of these, as some would say--childish antics, lead to a big pile of nothing because no one was brave enough to just ask you.

So now that you were all gathered around Rossi's living room, with the day's efforts in vain, you were forced to drastic measures. 

The wine glass was mere inches from your lips when the whole lot of them were up in arms--a blabbering, spiraling mess.

Garcia, her mouth a perfect 'o' of scandalized red, was quick to wrestle it from your grasp, hoisting it just beyond reach as Morgan promptly confiscated it, placing it atop the tallest bookshelf, as if you were a child meddling with contraband.

"What are you thinking?"

"Are you crazy?"

"What are you doing?"

"Hotch, do you see this?"

Their words bombarded you all at once, a rapid-fire of overlapping sentences that was impossible to decipher. A giggle escaped you, hand instinctively rising to your lips. Sure, you had braced for a reaction, but this was beyond anything you had imagined.

You played dumb, your head canting to one side as your brows contracted. "What?"

You basked in Aaron's exasperated eye roll, his hands coming together as if in prayer while he let you revel in the moment. He was a good man.

"What do you mean what? I love you so much, but you have to be out of your mind," Garcia probed, her hands clutching on to her necklace as she looked side to side at the others.

You opened your mouth, ready to provoke her further, but Spencer beat you to it.

"Given the potential impact on blood volume and plasma osmolality, it's really not advised to drink alcohol, considering your condition," he said, fidgeting with his tie while nodding to your belly.

"What condition?"

"Oh, come on! We found your pregnancy test in the trash today!" This time it was Emily speaking, her hands on her hips as she gave you a knowing glance. She quickly muffled her exclamation. "Hold on, you've told Hotch, right? If not, I'm prepared to get on my hands and knees and beg for your forgiveness if necessary."

"You all are ridiculous!" you declared, rising from the couch and moving toward your abandoned wine. Aaron was quicker, offering the glass to you. "I'm not pregnant, and if you nosy nellies had bothered to ask rather than speculate, you'd know that.”

You took a large gulp of your wine. For emphasis. Your colleagues' mouth hung agape, all but Rossi, who smirked and toasted to the absurdity with his whiskey.

"You heard us?"

"Reid, let's just say, I'd appreciate if you would reserve those observational talents for the case files, not on my girlfriend's anatomy," Hotch suggested, the warmth of his hand seeping through the fabric at your back as he casually sipped his scotch.

You watched Reid's complexion turn a spectrum of pink hues, his apology barely above a whisper as laughter bubbled around us. 

"Wait so then whose pregnancy test did I find?" Emily's words caused a collective breath to catch, glances shifting suspiciously around the room.

JJ's hand shot up, laughing as Garcia barreled into her side, arms wrapping around her before she could even get the admittance out. The room buzzed with congratulatory cheers, everyone sharing hugs and kisses as JJ told the story.

Aaron chose that instant to lift his hand to his neck, his lips meeting yours in a kiss so gentle it turned your insides to jelly. He eased back, his breath mingling with yours as he mumbled, "you know, the idea of you pregnant...it's not something I'm opposed to."

You let out a soft giggle, nestling your head against his chest, the steady beat of his heart bleeding into your ear. Your gaze drifted to your friends, toasting with raised glasses--minus JJ--with laughter and chatter filling the air.

"Is that so? Cravings, mood, boobs and all?"

You felt the rumble of his chuckle through his chest, the sensation tingling against your cheek. "All of it."

Rising onto your toes, you reached up to cradle his ear, lips grazing lightly against it. "How about we head home and practice? And then if you put a ring on it, I’ll consider it.”

That was the first time you had Irish goodbye-d a party.

[fanfictionismyaddiction]

When Roles Collide

Word count: 941

Pairing: max Verstappen x reader, ft. kelly and P

Summary: After expressing concern that Kelly relies too much on Max to care for her daughter, Y/n faces Kelly's anger.

______________________________________________________________

Kelly arrived at the apartment with P in tow, the little girl bounding into Max’s arms as soon as the door opened. You watched as Max smiled, scooping her up effortlessly, his affection for her always evident. But today, you felt a growing sense of frustration. This was the third time this week that Kelly had dropped her off with barely any notice, and as much as you loved P, something about this situation wasn’t right.

Once Max and P had gone off to play, you approached Kelly, who was halfway out the door. You could feel the words building inside of you, and you knew you had to say something before it continued.

"Kelly, can I talk to you for a second?" you asked, your voice calm but firm.

She paused, hand on the door, clearly not expecting this. "Sure, what’s up?"

You took a deep breath, trying to keep your tone even. "Look, I love having P around, and Max is always happy to see her. But I feel like lately, you’ve been relying on him a lot. She’s your daughter, and she needs time with you too. Max can't always be the one stepping in."

Kelly’s expression shifted instantly, her casual demeanor hardening into something defensive. "Excuse me?" she said sharply, her brows knitting together. "I’ve been busy, and P loves spending time with Max. Why do you care all of a sudden?"

You swallowed, taken aback by the sharpness of her response. "It’s not that I care 'all of a sudden.' I just think it’s important that P spends time with you, her mom. Max loves her, but you’re—"

Before you could finish, Kelly cut you off. "You’ve only been in Max’s life for, what, six months? And now you think you get to delegate how I raise my daughter?"

Her words hit like a slap, and you felt your chest tighten. "I’m not trying to delegate anything," you said, keeping your voice steady, though your heart was racing. "I’m just saying that it feels like Max is being put in a position where he’s—"

"Where he’s what? Being a father figure to the daughter he’s helped raise for years?" Kelly’s voice was growing louder, her anger bubbling over. "You don’t get it. You don’t know what it’s been like for me and P. Max has always been there for her, and now you just waltz in and decide you know what’s best?"

The frustration you’d been holding back for so long surged forward. "That’s not what I’m saying, Kelly! I get that Max has been there, and I love that about him. But I’m not trying to replace you or act like I know what’s best. I just think P needs her mom more than you realize."

Kelly crossed her arms, her eyes narrowing. "You think you know better than me, huh? After just half a year with Max, now you’re an expert?"

You shook your head, trying to remain calm even though the tension was thickening by the second. "I’m not trying to tell you how to be a mom, Kelly. I just think that you’re depending on Max a little too much, and it’s not fair to him either."

Kelly scoffed, her eyes flashing with irritation. "What’s not fair is you sticking your nose in where it doesn’t belong. Max and I have been handling this just fine before you came along."

Max, who must have overheard the raised voices, appeared in the doorway, his eyes darting between you and Kelly. "What’s going on?" he asked, his tone cautious but concerned.

Kelly didn’t hesitate. "Your girlfriend here thinks she knows better about how I should be raising P. Apparently, I’m not doing enough because I let her spend time with you."

Max’s eyes widened, and he glanced at you, clearly surprised. "That’s not what she’s saying, Kelly," he said softly, trying to diffuse the situation. "I think she’s just concerned, that’s all."

"Concerned," Kelly repeated bitterly. "How considerate of her. Well, news flash—this is my daughter we’re talking about, and Max, you’ve been like a second father to her for years. You don’t need anyone else telling you what’s best for her."

The anger in her voice was palpable, and you could see the hurt flashing in Max’s eyes as he tried to mediate. You wanted to defend yourself, to explain that you weren’t trying to come between anyone, but the words were stuck in your throat.

"I think it’s best if we just take a step back for now," Kelly said, turning toward the door. "I don’t need anyone questioning how I handle my daughter. I’ll figure it out on my own."

Before you could respond, she was gone, leaving the tension lingering in the room. Max let out a long breath, running a hand through his hair as he looked at you, unsure of what to say.

You felt a pang of guilt but also the undeniable weight of your frustration. "I wasn’t trying to upset her," you said quietly.

Max nodded, stepping closer. "I know. You’re just looking out for P and for us… but this is complicated." He hesitated, his eyes searching yours. "Kelly’s always been protective, especially when it comes to P. I think she feels like she’s losing control."

You sighed, rubbing your temples. "I just want what’s best for everyone."

Max pulled you into a hug, his arms wrapping around you protectively. "I know. And I appreciate you trying to help. We’ll figure this out. Together."

But as you leaned into him, you couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling that things had just gotten a lot more complicated.

[literaryvein-reblogs]

more words for your fight scenes (pt. 2)

Arrive

admission, alight, appearance, arrival, billow, butt in, come in, cross, disembark, embark, enter, foray, get back, get on, go ahead, immigrate, influx, intrude, invasion, lance, light, lunge, penetrate, pierce, progress, reach, return, stalk, trespass, turn up

Illegal behavior

assault, backstab, bleed, break, bribe, buy, conspire, contravene, delinquency, disobey, extortion, felony, foul, graft, hara-kiri, holdup, imposture, infringe, intrigue, kickback, larceny, loot, misconduct, misdeed/misdemeanor, offense, pick, piracy, poach, rip off, rip-off, robbery, shenanigans, smear campaign, speculation, stick up, take, theft, treason, victimize, violation

Join physically

link, merge, mingle, piece, splice, tuck, unite, weld, yoke

Jump

bounce, clear, dive, gallop, hop, lunge, plunge, rear, recoil, skip, start, vault

Leave

abandon, back, blow, bolt, break, break out, cringe, dart, depart, desert, deviate, digress, disappearance, distance, draw back, ebb, embark, exit, fall back, flee, fly, get along, get out, goodbye, go out, jilt, light out, maroon, parting, push off/push on, quit, recoil, renunciation, resign, retire, run, scram, segregation, shake off, shrink, strike out, takeoff, threads, trousers, vacate, withdrawal

Prepare physically

acclimate, accustom, braid, brush up, bundle, coat, disguise, domesticate, dress, embattle, fine-tune, fix up, fortify, gear, gild, gloss, grease, habituate, knit, make up, modulate, overhaul, pad, plaster, polish, prepare, preserve, primp, reform, refrigerate, regenerate, rejuvenate, renovate, round, set, shine, smear, square, strain, toughen, training, weather

Pull

drag, extract, lug, pluck, schlep, strain, tow, twist, wrench, yank

Push

advance, back, barge in/barge into, billow, blow up, bulge, burst, compress, crowd, crush, depress, drive, extrude, force, indent, insinuate, jam, jolt, knead, mash, mob, notch, poke, prod, protrude, pump, repel, roll, shove, slam, squish, tax, tip, trample, wrestle, wring

Weapon

A-bomb, armament(s), arrow, atom bomb, battery, bullet, catapult, defense, explosive, firearm, gun, missile, nuclear weapon, ordnance, rocket

NOTE

The above are concepts classified according to subject and usage. It not only helps writers and thinkers to organize their ideas but leads them from those very ideas to the words that can best express them.

It was, in part, created to turn an idea into a specific word. By linking together the main entries that share similar concepts, the index makes possible creative semantic connections between words in our language, stimulating thought and broadening vocabulary.

Source ⚜ Writing Basics & Refreshers ⚜ On Vocabulary ⚜ part 1 Writing Notes: Fight Scenes ⚜ Word Lists: Fight ⚜ Pain

[p0orbaby]

Take One for the Team

summary: you and alexia are in a secret relationship

warnings: talks of sex

a/n: i volunteer as tribute

word count: 1.1k

-

Alexia's been on a warpath for a week now. You can tell because she's more vocal than usual about everyone else's inadequacies, and that's saying something. Today, she's pacing around the changing room like a caged lioness, ranting about the “abysmal” performance during training. You’re pretty sure she’s the only one who noticed anyone playing badly. The rest of the team looks at each other like, “What the hell is she talking about?”

To be fair, she's not entirely wrong. Someone did manage to miss an open goal from three yards out, but the way she's going on, you'd think that someone also insulted her grandmother and keyed her car.

In one particularly low moment, she accuses Ona of “running like she’s towing a tractor.” Ona’s response is to half-heartedly flip her off, which might’ve made Alexia angrier, but she’s already storming off to harass someone else.

You’re trying to stay under the radar because you’ve already received your daily dose of Alexia’s wrath earlier when you suggested—very helpfully, you thought—that she might want to “relax her shoulders a little.” You even demonstrated a quick shoulder roll for her. In response, she gave you a stare so cold you’re surprised you didn’t get frostbite on the spot.

So, you’re sitting on the bench, quietly tying your shoelaces and pretending you’re anywhere but here, when Aitana slides in next to you. She doesn’t say anything at first, just sighs dramatically and starts fiddling with a pretend loose thread on her shorts.

“Do you think she’s always like this?” Aitana asks eventually. “I mean, off the pitch. Like, what’s her problem?”

You shrug because what else can you do? You can’t exactly explain to Aitana that Alexia’s been on edge because you stole the last of her favorite cereal this morning and refused to apologise. In your defense, it was your cereal. But Alexia can hold a grudge like nobody’s business, and you’re pretty sure that’s why she’s been lashing out at everyone.

Still, you’re not about to say that out loud. You like your life the way it is, uncomplicated by having your secret relationship exposed by a rogue comment about breakfast food.

The others start to gather around, sensing a potential gossip session. The changing room is like that, everyone gravitating toward any sign of drama, like moths to a flame. Irene joins in, wiping sweat off her forehead with her shirt and making it clear she’s had enough of Alexia’s mood swings.

“She needs to get laid,” she declares, completely deadpan.

You almost choke on your own saliva, trying to play it cool while swallowing your surprise. The rest of the team nods in agreement, as if this is the most reasonable suggestion anyone has made in days. You, meanwhile, are caught between wanting to laugh and desperately trying not to give yourself away.

“She probably hasn’t gotten any in weeks,” Cata adds with a knowing smirk, like she’s an expert in Alexia’s sex life. Or her supposed lack thereof.

Mapi grins like she’s just figured out how to solve world hunger. “We need to volunteer someone”

Oh no. No, no, no. You can see where this is going, and you’re about to make a break for it when, Patri, Irene, and Mapi all turn to you simultaneously, their eyes practically gleaming with mischief.

“You should do it,” Patri says, pointing a finger at you like she’s accusing you of a crime.

You blink at her, feigning innocence. “Why me?”

Irene shrugs. “Why not? You’re like... the calmest person here. You can handle her”

Ingrid’s eyes narrow in on you, and she tilts her head. “Plus, you’re not bad-looking”

“I appreciate the backhanded compliment,” you say dryly, glancing at the door, wondering if you can make a run for it before they start making detailed plans. “But why would I want to-”

“Take one for the team!” Mapi interrupts, practically cackling. The others join in, laughing like they’ve just solved a great mystery. “It’s a win-win. She gets laid, and we don’t have to deal with her bullshit for at least a day”

You have to admit, it’s a decent plan. If you weren’t already sleeping with Alexia, that is. But they don’t know that, and you can’t exactly tell them without revealing your secret, which would definitely make things awkward.

You open your mouth to object, but Ona cuts you off. “It’s perfect. You’ve got that whole mysterious vibe. She’ll be into it”

“You think she’ll be into it?” you ask, raising an eyebrow.

Marta grins. “She might kill you first, but that’s a risk we’re willing to take”

They all laugh, and you can’t help but smirk. They have no idea how much Alexia is “into it,” but you’re not about to spill the beans now.

“Fine,” you say with a dramatic sigh, pretending to mull it over. “I’ll do it. For the team”

Irene pats you on the back like you’re about to go off to war. “Good luck, soldier. You’re going to need it”

“Thanks for the vote of confidence,” you deadpan, but they’re already high-fiving each other, congratulating themselves on their brilliant scheme.

-

Later, when you finally get Alexia alone, she’s still fuming, muttering something about people not taking the game seriously. You’re not really paying attention, though, because you’re still stuck on what the team said earlier. You can’t help but laugh when you think about it, which only makes Alexia glare at you more.

“What’s so funny?” she snaps, crossing her arms.

You shake your head, still grinning. “Nothing. Just thinking about how you’re really wound up lately”

Her eyes narrow, and she takes a step closer, a dangerous glint in her eyes. “And?”

“And,” you say, dropping your voice to a low murmur as you pull her in by the waist, “the team thinks you need to get laid”

Alexia blinks at you, her expression shifting from anger to surprise, and then she lets out a laugh, genuine and loud, like she hasn’t in days. “Is that so?”

“Mm-hmm,” you hum, nuzzling her neck as she relaxes in your arms. “They volunteered me. Said I should take one for the team”

Alexia pulls back just enough to meet your eyes, her mouth curving into a wicked smile. “You told them we’ve been doing that for months now?”

“Nah,” you say, shaking your head. “Figured I’d let them keep thinking they’re the geniuses”

She laughs again, shaking her head in disbelief, then leans in to kiss you, her lips warm and soft against yours. When she pulls back, she looks a lot less stressed than she did before, which you consider a job well done.

“Think I’ll have to thank them later,” she murmurs, brushing a thumb over your cheek.

You smirk, tilting your head playfully. “You mean thank me?”

Alexia’s eyes glint with that same dangerous edge from before, but this time it’s paired with a smirk that promises nothing but trouble. “I already do, don’t I?”

You can’t argue with that. And for once, neither can the team.

[hoshigray]

Having thoughts about Toji crushing on a cutie little cinnamon roll. Maybe they go on a few dates before he finally gets her home with him, and just as things are heating up he realizes oh, she’s a virgin. That doesn’t mean he’s not interested, but it changes how he wants to go about it.

Noonie, yeeeeeeeeessss!!! I had the dumbest grin while reading this in my inbox teheheee~ Longer than I intended but what the hell lol hope you like it!!

Cw: dom! Toji x fem!reader - age gap (the reader is at least in their 20s and in college; Toji is around mid-30s) -missionary position - unprotected sex (PSA: wrap it up, or get the fuck up) - ass grabbing - pussy eating - biting (Toji bites your ears) - edging (fem! receiving) - pet names (angel, baby, cutie, sweetheart, mama, princess) - clitoral play - light comedy bc I do[n't] think I'm funny. Wc: 2k

"Ready, baby?"

Your body goes rigid, fingers playing with the hem of your shirred frilled cami romper. A shaky sigh seethes from a wary smile. "Yes." The man in front of you grins before opening the door to his place, and you enter to your doom.

Toji has been courting you for quite some time. It started with small greetings when he visited the café where you work for his usual order of black coffee. Then those greetings slowly evolved into casual chit-chat, prompting Toji to ask you out because he couldn't resist your kindhearted aura.

How could he when his day instantly brightens when you flash your gorgeous smile every time you see him? Or when you always give him a call or text anytime you return to your dorm after hanging outside campus grounds. And when you're done with work, you let him drive and drop you off at your dorm. But that's because he always stays at the café until you get off: watching you welcome customers who enter the space, offering free treats to kids, or giving him a tiny smile from the other side of the shop whenever you catch him staring. Makes him snicker like an idiot.

But his favorite moment with you was the first time you two kissed on your third date. Oh, Toji could replay the scene all fucking day. With your eyes lidded, lips quivering and gripping onto his leather jacket as the man peppered you in kisses, he adored your display of pleasure. And it was even more adorable when you nervously bid him goodnight before entering your dorm room.

It was entertaining how he was the only one that made you — his cute little darling — so shy whenever he came too close. So much so that it turned him on, his desire to have you under him waxing inside him day by day. Except he doesn't, choosing to wait for the perfect time.

And now, when he finally has you where he's been dying to have you, Toji's allowed to indulge in your charm personally. There are shudders of anticipation around him as he kisses you on the couch, his big hands roaming over your form. A deep chortle vibrates his throat when he bites your bottom lip, resulting in a shivering whimper from your swollen lips. Oh, he's going to enjoy every second of this.

But as someone on the other side of the makeout session, you found yourself in an unpleasant position. Not because you didn't want to be here smacking lips with Toji, oh no. He was a great kisser, taking your breath away simply by his lips. No, the real problem was more personal.

Something so personal that it has your brows trench as Toji's hands snake down to your butt, kneading it like putty. Wait a minute...

"Mmmm, Toji, please wa—"

"Shhhh," he hushes you with kisses down your neck. "Taste so good, angel."

Something very personal that your eyes are towed shut when he creeps a hand inside through the bottom of your romper, a warm palm groping the soft flesh of your ass. Wait, wait, wait!

Something extremely personal that you gasp sharply when you feel two fingers sneak past your panties. WAIT!!!

You push Toji off you in haste, and the older man stops with his hands up defensively. He looks at you with confusion, tilting his head to examine what's wrong. You squeak and throw apologies his way. "I'm so so sorry! I'm-I'm just...umm...."

It takes a few seconds for Toji to piece everything together, with the way you're talking in quiet mumbles, your hands fidgeting with your romper again, and your eyes downward to avoid his gaze. His head straightens with eyes slightly wide. Is...Is she a—

"Are you a virgin, sweetheart?" Another muffled squeak confirms his suspicions, and you nod with hesitance.

What were you thinking pushing him off!? If you're gonna have your first time with anyone, why not be the man you're attracted to? But then again, it is YOUR first time!! In humiliation, you cover your face with your hands, the phone call you had with your best friend earlier replaying in your head ("Get it, girl! You either die a virgin or live long enough to get some good dick in your life." "That's the worst way to reference that movie!" "What-the-fuck-ever, go get that dick!!")

You can hear a chuckle from the man, and your eyes shut as you descend further into embarrassment. Oh God, I should've taken my dumbass home so I didn't have to deal with this later and cry myself to—

Your train of thought grinds to a halt when Toji pulls you into his chest. "Oh c'mere, ya cutie." He rubs circles on your back. "Did my lil' angel save herself up fr' me to deflower?"

"No, you perv!" He barks out a laugh above you, not helping this situation. "I just...I-" You try to retort, but the way he looks at you with a sly look and playful grin has your stomach flip. Why's he so goddamn handsome!? "I was just....never ready."

He hums pensively, still rubbing your back. He stays quiet for a while, and you don't bother fixing that while resting on his chest. He doesn't say anything until a minute later. "Think yr' ready now?"

"I don't know? Kinda scared..." You're honest. "But I...I really wanna do it with you, Toji."

"Then, do ya trust me?"

"Yeah, I do."

"Well, in that case," Toji carefully pushes you off him before he hoists you up bridal style. The swift motion catching by surprise as you hurriedly wrap your arms around his neck before he starts walking. Amused, he kisses your cheek. "Don't worry a thing, princess. Gonna take care of ya real good."

You gulp as your face goes hot. Oh, I definitely should've stayed my ass home...

Yeah, you definitely should've.

Fifteen minutes in, your senses are already clouded by the lapping motions of Toji's tongue on your vulva. You're lying on his bed, your figure writhing and back arching from the commotion between your legs. You tried to contain yourself by concealing your moans, yet your lips let the pornographic noises fly.

The last fifteen minutes have been spent preparing you for the big event. Toji started by fingering your hole, making you adjust to having a foreign limb within you. When you were wet enough, one digit became two, and you grabbed ahold of his shirt as he did his expert work on your soaking chasm.

Now in your nude, you let the man continue to prep you, his hands holding onto your legs with your pussy out for him to see, for him to toy with his wet muscle between your folds and drinking your essence.

"Ahhhh-Haaaah! T-Tojiii," you look so out of it, your head squirming around the pillow beneath you and your words slurred. You've already come two times; what more does this man need for you to be ready? "Oh God, it's too much fer mee, 's too muuch!"

A sharp cry exits your mouth when the man licks your clitoris, his deep forest green eyes peer up to look at you. He snickers, "C'mon, mama, you know I gotta have my girl ready to take in all of me." He flicks his tongue on your bud, and another yelp escapes your lips. "Lemme finish up here, 'kay?"

And he goes back to finishing you up, his hands grabbing you by the hips to bring you closer to his ravenous mouth. You clutch tufts of his raven hair, and his name comes out in incoherent babbles.

Your eyes start to water as your head gets dizzy with the raunchy noises from down south. Your cold sweat contrasts with your hot bare form, and the throbbing sensation between your legs festers under your skin.

Beads of sweat scroll down your forehead. You're close to release. "Hngg! Toji, I'm gonna cu-cummm!"

Suddenly, Toji removes from your legs, leaving you and your pulsing slits to the substituted cold air. You whine for your neglected orgasm that withers away, propping yourself up to beg him to give you what you want. But your breath hitches before you can make a complaint.

Toji is off his bed, withdrawing his shirt and jeans, freeing his cock from his boxer briefs. You can't help but stare at the member before you. Following the trail of hair from his lower abdomen, his erection sprung up with precum oozing out. Compared to your fingers or toys, his dick is way beyond your comprehension in length and girth.

Oh, to die from the first dick you've ever taken. How poetic.

Toji notices you ogle at his shaft, sneering as he returns to the bed. "Like what ya see, cutie?" You chew on your lip when Toji props your legs around his waist, a hand used to position his shaft to your leaky entrance. "Gonna start real slow, so take some deep breaths fr' me, 'kay baby?" You nod, internally bracing yourself for what's about happen.

The head of his cock touches your slit, and you jolt. "Relax, baby. It's gonna hurt if you're tense like that." He coaxes, your breathing securing you from the intrusion. He watches you; with each exhale, he pushes himself. The unfamiliar limb prying in your vagina and the pain you're experiencing is like no other. But you bite down on your lip to push through.

When the tip makes it in, you gasp. Gradually, Toji pushes his member further into you, stretching your tight hole to accommodate his girth. You try to compose yourself with even breaths, but you shriek when you feel his length brush against your G-spot. When the base kisses your cunt, Toji gives you a few minutes to adapt to him. "How ya feelin'?"

"So full..." You look at him with brows scrunched, eyes hooded, and tears streaming down your pretty face.

"Hmm, I bet." He wipes your tears with the rough pads of his fingers before slowly thrusting into you. You grip his shoulders for support, your pussy tightening around his length while your legs cage him. "Oooooh, Christ, you're so tight, mama. Drivin' me fuckin' crazy."

And you're about to be driven crazier when his hips pick up the pace, his dick hitting your sweet spots with precision. It's so surreal finally experiencing your first time, especially with Toji. Maybe it's because he's older and more experienced, but whatever expectations you had up until this point have been blown out of the water. The slap of his pelvis on your slick-coated folds fills his room, his throaty groans sound way too good to the ears, and his hot kisses on your lips make you melt. It all feels so electrifying.

Just when you thought you were undergoing it all, Toji slithers a hand down to your clitoris and swipes up and down on the pearl with his thumb. A choked sob leaves puffy lips, "T-Toji, I'm so close. Please, please, please, let me—Oh God."

"Hnnmph, oh shit—" He's close, too. He bends down to nibble on your ear yet licks the pain away. "I know, sweetheart. Come on me." His thrusts then go faster, a merciless tempo you were unprepared for. Shrieks go higher as your orgasm climbs up, and it hits you hard when Toji's fingers play with your clit again. Your climax sends shivers up your spine, your tender walls pulsating on Toji's cock.

And the older man pulls his dick out of your sensitive cunt, letting his come spill onto your stomach. It looked so lewd yet deliciously attractive, especially with him heaving on top of you with his black bangs sticking to his forehead.

When you two calm down, Toji scans your disheveled appearance and chuckles. "Damn, yr' gonna have me addicted to ya, princess." Your stomach was wiped off with a towel that Toji had on hand as you giggled aimlessly.

"Wanna go again?"

"......yes?" You avoid eye contact and turn away bashfully. He chortles and kisses your cheek once more.

"So fuckin' cute."

[soullumii]

stranded | joel miller x f!reader

pairing: joel miller x afab!fem!reader

summary: you get stranded in the middle of a blizzard. joel comes to your rescue. you share a bed for warmth. things escalate from there...

warnings/tags: 18+ content, MDNI!, smutttttt yurrrr (vaginal fingering, unprotected piv sex, dubious consent, lil bit of somnophilia, joel is packinggg), no outbreak!joel, modern au, implied age gap, soft!joel, pet names (peach, baby, darlin', sweet girl, sweetheart), lil bit of joel being jelly, cuddling to keep the cold at bay, fluff, NO USE OF Y/N

word count: 7.6k (idk what the fuck happened)

“Damn it!” 

You press down hard on the gas pedal, grimacing when your engine revs but the car doesn’t move an inch.

Your tires skid uselessly over the snow and your headlights reflect into a white wall of nothing—the snowfall so thick you can’t see anything in front of or around you, as if you’re trapped in a snow globe. The road is practically gone from existence.

The only thing you can hear is the wind whistling and the staticky sound of Carrie Underwood’s ‘Jesus Take the Wheel’ going in and out on the radio.

Yeah, you wish he would right about now. 

“Fuuuck,” you whine, eyes stinging with unshed tears. You hit your wheel in frustration, dropping your forehead onto the horn. It honks pityingly. 

Of course, the one time you were actually going out, you had forgotten to check the weather. 

You’re probably going to die out here on this back road through the woods. There’s no one around, not that you can tell, and you’re low on gas. You were going to fill up once you got out of the woods and back into civilization, but the blizzard had other plans.

Your stomach rumbles, crying out for the dinner you had skipped in hopes of having a hearty, post-sex meal with the hook-up you are—or were—on the way to see. Though, that’s certainly not happening, and the snacks you usually had stuffed into the glovebox are gone, your sister having stolen them last week after you dropped her off at school.

(Darn that growing goober!) 

You don’t have anything that might prove useful in this situation besides the long, slim heels on your pumps (which could be used in defense), and the thin peacoat wrapped around your shoulders. You check your phone to see if you can call a towing company, but of course, it has zero bars. 

“Shit, shit, shit,” you whimper, pressing the heel of your palm to your watering eyes. 

“It’s gonna be fine,” you say to yourself, picking your head up and rubbing away the tears in your eyes. You take deep breaths and put the car into park. “You’ll be fine.”

The sudden sound of a knock on your window startles you so bad you yelp, jumping in place as ice cold terror rises up your spine. 

You can hardly see who had knocked, only their gray silhouette in the white blizzard.

The stranger knocks again. 

“You alright in there?” The shadow asks, a hint of a Texan accent curling their vowels. Shit. It’s a man. 

You slowly grab your shoe from your foot, holding it so the heel faces the window, and snow blows into your face as you carefully roll it down an inch or two for precaution, because who knows if it’s a fucking cannibal-axe-murderer who preys on unsuspecting women stranded in the snow. Maybe he does this every year—maybe this is his prime harvesting place and time. 

Your eyes are wide as you peer through the opening warily, heel at the ready. 

He’s close enough now that you can make out a prominent scowl, hard brown eyes, salt and pepper hair…

…wait a minute. You’d recognize that glower anywhere.

“Joel?”

Your lungs suddenly remember how to work again, and you inhale on a shaky breath. The hand holding your shoe drops to your thigh in relief.

His brown eyes narrow. “Peach…? The hell are you doin’ out here?” He asks, and Jesus you forgot about that stupid nickname he gave you. It sends butterflies loose in your stomach. “It’s a goddamn blizzard.” 

You scowl in exasperation, though, at his obvious observation. “Yeah, I think I know that, Joel. What are you doing here?”

“I heard a honk, figured someone needed help.” He looks you up and down, his gaze lingering on the circles of mascara around your eyes. “Guess I’m right.”

You straighten in your seat, the gratitude you feel at his presence is overshadowed by the need to look self sufficient and capable, because you are. You’re a grown ass woman! So…

“I don’t need your help,” you huff.

He arches a brow. “Really.” It’s not a question.

You glower. “Maybe.”

Joel leans an arm on the frame of your car, and taps your window once more. “C’mon. Let’s go.” 

God, this is so embarrassing!

“Fine.” You roll up the window and turn off the car. Joel tugs the car door open as far as it can go and offers a gloved hand to help you out. You wobble a bit when you step out in your heels, grateful that Joel is there to steady you. Though, the feeling sours a bit when he huffs in disbelief at your shoes. 

You send him a glare, “I had plans for tonight, okay?”

“In the middle of a blizzard?” He deadpans.

“It wasn’t that bad when I first started driving.”

“Riiiight,” he drawls, “Well, I’m sorry to say, peach, but you ain’t driving in this mess anymore. You can stay with me tonight.” He says, closing the car door behind you. 

Stay? With him? 

“Joel, I couldn’t bother you with—“

“I wouldn’t offer if it was a bother.”

Joel’s as stubborn as a bull, more so than Ellie. And she is stubborn. You don’t argue, because it’s fruitless to argue with a brick wall like him. And, faced with freezing to death out here or staying in a well-insulated building, choosing the latter is obviously the right thing to do.

“Okay,” you relent and point to your trunk. “I have a bag back there.”

He raises a brow. “Heels and a bag…What kind of plans were we talkin’ about here?”

A hook up, Joel, you mentally drawl. Because…that’s exactly why you were out. 

Like hell you’ll tell Joel that, though, he’d disapprove. He’s always been the protective type. You’ve known him since your junior year in college, after your families practically merged. But you’ve never seen Joel as another dad. He’s always been…something else to you.

“A trip to Nunya.” You supply instead of the truth, crossing your arms over your chest to try and conserve some heat. 

“Nunya?” Joel’s brows furrow. 

“Yeah. Nunya business, Joel.” You give him a sardonic smile. 

He shakes his head and sends you a look you’re quite familiar with, the one that makes you feel inches smaller. And ten degrees hotter. 

Joel sighs in exasperation and wordlessly wrenches the trunk open. He slings your bag over his shoulder as if it weighs nothing.

(It weighs a lot. You’d know, you shoved five different erotica books in there, just in case your date failed to make you orgasm.)

(Though thinking about Joel probably would’ve been enough.) 

You lock your vehicle with a bemused glance. “What are we gonna do about my car?” 

“I’ll tow it out tomorrow,” Joel says. “Roads are a fuckin’ mess right now.”

You trudge behind Joel to his quaint cottage sleeping cozily between tall pine trees and chubby evergreens. The porch light is on, and the windows glow a comforting orange. Puffs of smoke drift up from the chimney. It looks warm and inviting, like straight out of a Christmas movie. 

You’re impressed at how close you managed to strand yourself to his house. Maybe Jesus really did take the wheel. 

Joel kicks the snow off his boots on his front porch, then opens the door, gesturing for you to enter first. 

When you breach the doorway with Joel at your heels, warmth settles over your cold-bitten cheeks along with an alluring aroma of meat and tomato and spices that hits you in a wave. You’ve never seen Joel cook anything other than Chef Boyardee Beefaroni, or burgers on Tommy’s rusting grill before, so this is certainly a surprise. It could be Sarah or Ellie’s cooking, but last time you checked, Sarah could cook eggs and Ellie could cook, well, nothing.

“So did you hire a personal chef to make whatever smells so good?”

He sets your bag down in the foyer with a grunt and shrugs out of his coat. “I made it.”

You can’t help the disbelieving laugh that bursts out of you, and the slightly offended look on Joel’s face only makes it harder to stop. You cover your mouth with your hand, but you’re absolutely positive he can see the mirth lighting in your eyes.

Though he’s offended, there’s a twitch to his lip, as if he’s trying not to laugh. “I’m perfectly capable of cooking.”

“I’m sorry—I’m sorry,” you try to stamp down your giggles. “Yes, you’re capable but… is it edible?”

Your stomach decides in that moment to start rumbling, and he smirks.

“Guess you’ll have to find out.”

You take your coat off and follow Joel towards the kitchen. As you follow, you take in his aggressively Texan decor and furniture. Paintings of cowboys and horses and mountains are hung artfully on cozy, beige walls. The Eagles’ discography drifts merrily in the air from an old record player. There’s a guitar stationed in practically every corner. It’s all so very Joel, though the random space ornamentals and butterfly drawings sprinkled about are so very Ellie and Sarah. It makes you smile. 

“Where are the girls?” You ask, because usually those little stinkers would be stationed at the dining room table, bickering over the answer to a ridiculously difficult math problem.

“At Dina’s,” he answers, taking off his gloves and dropping them on the table. “They wanted to play in the snow.”

Oh. So you’re here alone with him. Anxiety prickles at the edges of your mind, sinking in your stomach.

“I guess I was the only one that didn’t know about the blizzard, then.” 

“You must be livin’ under a rock to not know about it.”

You grumble in protest, but your grievances disintegrate on your tongue as you enter the kitchen and near the simmering pot. You breathe in the aroma, the smell so powerful it's almost like you’re actually tasting it. 

You look over your shoulder at him. “Is this chili?”

He nods. “Want some?”

“Absolutely.”

He comes up beside you to open a cabinet. “Go ‘head make yourself comfortable on the couch. I’ll bring it out to you.” Your mouth dries at the sliver of skin that peeks out beneath his flannel as he reaches up.

You force yourself to turn around. “Wow. Such a gentleman, didn’t realize you were capable,” you say, your saccharine sweet tone doing well to mask how flustered you feel. You can breathe easier the second you exit the kitchen and enter the living room. 

His voice follows you. “A simple ‘thank you’ ‘stead'a this attitude would do you some good, y'know?"

"I know," you sing-song, grinning as you settle yourself down onto his couch, grabbing a blanket from a basket on the way. A fire crackles in the hearth and you study the flames with fascination as warmth spreads across your skin. You tug the blanket around you, pulling it up to your chin. 

Joel emerges a minute later and your gaze darts from the fire to the bowl he holds out to you. “Here.”

“Thank you, Joel,” you say emphatically, accepting the bowl and cradling it in your hands. 

He smiles, “There we go. Guess you do have some manners.”

You give him a half-bow. Joel just smiles in that familiar way, like you’re just so ridiculous he can’t believe it. It makes your stomach curl giddily. 

Having rolled up the sleeves of his flannel to his elbows, Joel’s forearms are on display, muscles flexing as he tosses another log into the hearth, and you drop your gaze to your chili, as to not get caught staring. He sits down in the armchair adjacent to you with his own bowl.

You blow on the steaming chili before taking a bite, an involuntary moan releasing from you the moment it hits your tongue—paprika, peppers, tomato, cumin. It warms your stomach pleasantly. Who knew Joel could cook so well?

“This is so good,” you mumble around your bite. 

He swallows his own chili down, pupils large as he watches you. “Edible enough for ya?”

You nod enthusiastically, “I’m sorry I ever doubted you.”

“Mmhmm,” he hums, unconvinced, but he’s smiling at you again, and you can’t help but return it. 

Comfortable silence lapses between the both of you as you eat your meals. Joel finishes first, of course, setting his bowl on the coffee table and leaning into his chair with a satisfied groan. He throws an arm over the back, spreading his legs. You watch him while he watches the fire, heat licking through you.

Eventually, after you slow down, you speak again.

“Thank you, Joel, seriously, for letting me stay.”

His eyes find yours and he nods. “‘Course, peach. Wouldn’t’ve let you freeze out there.” 

You nod and glance around, taking in his cabin. A large, stone fireplace is set in the wall, a tree trunk coffee table stationed in the center of the living room, some handmade wood carvings of horses and other animals scattered about. There’s a drawing of himself sitting on the mantel, “To: Joel, From: Ellie” signed at the bottom. Your heart swells. 

“It’s been awhile since I’ve been here,” you remark.

“I know,” Joel says. “You should come around more often. The girls miss you.”

Your smile turns shy and you feel a spike of bravery. “What about you? Do you miss me?” 

He takes a moment to answer, a veiny hand coming up to rub at his beard as he leans on the arm of the chair. Onyx eyes drag down your figure. “‘Course I do, darlin’” 

Heat pools hot and thick between your thighs at that look, and you’re about to press him about how much he really misses you when a buzzing in your pocket captures your attention. Your phone. Guess you have some bars now. 

marcus: where r u?

Oh right, the hookup!

you: blizzard blocked the roads. won’t make it tonight.

marcus: ok. 

You scoff at the lack of depth in his response. Not even a “stay safe out there”? Jesus. You settle into the couch with a frustrated sigh, head thumping against the cushions, eyes falling shut as exhaustion creeps into you. 

Boys always thinking with their dicks. Why do you even bother?

“What’s that about?” Joel asks. You peek an eye open at him. Firelight dances across his tan skin. He gestures to your phone. “That gotta do with the real reason for your trip tonight?” 

You rub your temple, “Yeah.”

He hums. "...Listen, I know it's none of my business but—“ 

"It was a hookup, Joel," you interrupt, already knowing where he was going with that. He tends to do that, beat around the bush so much until you’re desperate to just say it. More desperate than he was to know it. You’d rather just skip that whole process. 

"Oh,” his brows furrow.

"Yeah," you repeat dumbly, fiddling with the blanket.

"There, uh, ain't no shame in that, darlin'."

You quirk a skeptical brow, "I know."

"Alright," he mumbles, avoiding eye contact with you. Awkwardness settles between you.

"Things are just a bit dry," you supply, though you have no idea why you're still talking, or why you described yourself and the state of your love-life like that because Joel doesn't need to know that. Nobody needs to know that

But it captures his attention, because he's looking at you again, though this time annoyance is written on his features, along with something else you can’t name, his eyes practically black. Damnit, you knew he’d disapprove, even if he claims there’s no shame in it.

“And you went to some random boy for that?"

You straighten on the couch. "Who else am I supposed to go to, Joel? You?” Sarcasm drips from your words. 

What the hell is he implying?

His gaze jumps to the fire, the muscles in his jaw clenching, his fingers flexing on the arm of his chair. "Never mind I said anythin'."

Your arms cross defensively over your chest. "I don't need your judgment, Joel.”

"I ain't judgin'."

"Sure sounds like it."

He stands abruptly, running a hand through his peppered locks. "I'm not, I just—listen, it's gettin' late. You should sleep. I didn’t have time to get the girls’ room ready, do you want my bed?”

You shake your head, "Couch is perfectly fine, Joel. Thanks."

“You sure?”

“Yes, Joel. I’m a grown woman who can handle her decisions.” 

"I know that.” Frustration laces his words. He sighs, hand coming up to rest on his belt. “Just... let me know if you need anythin'."

“You got it.”

He turns the living room light off on the way to his bedroom down the hall. You don’t watch him leave. 

Once he's gone, you change into your pajamas and settle yourself on the couch beneath a blanket or two. The crackling of the fire and the howling wind outside lulls you to sleep faster than you expect. 

-----

“Fuck.”

The aggressive shivers that wrack your body are what wake you up in the middle of the night. 

Your blanket is wrapped tightly around you, but it’s a thin, furry thing. Nothing like the down comforter you have at home. The fire has also gone out in the hearth, low flames flickering in the ash.

You pull the blanket up to your chin, curling in on yourself as the cold permeates your skin. 

Aside from the chattering of your teeth and the squall outside, it’s eerily silent in the house. You realize, now, that the whooshes from the heating system you had grown accustomed to before are gone

Shit.

You reach for the lamp on the side table, pulling down on the chain. It doesn’t turn on.

“Shit.” 

You sit up, blanket wrapped around your waist. The power is out. The snow storm must’ve knocked out a power line. It’s too cold to stay out here with only your thin blanket and the clothes on your back. And Joel had said…

Let me know if you need anythin’.

You really don’t want to bother him, but the goose flesh rippling across your skin and the pathetic way your lips are quivering, along with the shudders that wrack your body as it attempts to maintain homeostasis are not something you can just sleep through.

You tightly wrap your blanket around your shoulders and tiptoe down the hall. You can see a warm light from Joel’s bedroom, the flicker of a flame on the cream walls.

You slowly push the door open but hesitate at the sight of Joel buried comfortably beneath his comforter. You don’t want to wake him… but his room is awfully toasty from the fire crackling away in his own hearth. And his bed looks absolutely heavenly. 

You steel yourself and pad to the side he sleeps on. 

“Joel?” You whisper. He doesn’t respond.

You lean over to gently push his shoulder. “Joel.”

“Mm—“ His brows furrow, and he scrunches further into the blankets, reminiscent of a cat curling its paws over its head when woken up.

You push his shoulder again, a bit harder this time. “Joel. Wake up.”

He swats at the air, as if your hand is a fly buzzing around his ear. “‘M awake,” he mumbles against the pillow. 

“Joel—the power went out. I’m freezing.”

He’s silent for a moment, eyes still shut. He’s no doubt rolling the words around in his head, trying to make sense of them through a sleepy haze.  

Then, when he does, he wordlessly scoots back and reaches for the comforter. He lifts it, offering the space next to him to you.

“C’mere.” 

You splutter, taken off guard by the invitation. “What? Joel—“

“‘M not askin’, peach. C’mere.” The last word leaves his lips like a command, and you straighten reflexively, apprehension holding your limbs hostage as want curls dangerously low in your abdomen at his tone of voice. That should be enough warning to not climb into bed with him.

You debate telling him to get his ass up and give you another blanket along with a couple more logs in the hearth so you can avoid any kind of proximity between you (lest you feel those capital-f Feelings), but you can practically feel the heat radiating from the bed and his body beckoning you in. 

Oh fuck it.

You let loose a shaky breath and hesitantly slip beneath the covers, facing away from him. You stay glued to the edge of the bed, careful not to let any part of you touch him. Your legs curl into your chest for extra measure. Immediately, it’s so much better. So warm. So comfortable.

And it smells like Joel.

You inhale the earthy and spicy scent of him that lingers on the linen as your head sinks into the soft pillow, but your inhale chokes off as Joel’s strong arm snakes around your waist beneath the comforter, his large hand burning like a brand when it settles hot over your stomach.

He pulls you into him, the sheets swishing as he tucks you into his body. Your back slots against his warm, broad naked chest. His bare legs intertwine with yours, his pelvis almost flush against your ass, only covered by a thin pair of briefs. 

Holy shit. 

You can feel everything. 

“Joel?” You question, voice quivering at the sudden closeness. “What are you doing?”

“Keepin’ you warm,” he mumbles against the nape of your neck. 

You do feel warmer, though it might not be entirely because he’s holding you, but rather because of how he’s holding you. He’s curled around you, like a koala around a tree, thighs bracketing yours. 

You can feel his beard scraping at the nape of your neck, breaths puffing against your feverish skin. 

His thumb is rubbing softly along the pudge of your tummy, palm branding your skin, his fingers dipping innocently beneath the hem of your shorts. 

You can barely breathe, or even think, heartbeat stuttering as arousal pools liquid hot and heavy between your legs. Every unknowing twitch from Joel’s fingers makes it worse. Every touch of his calloused fingertips against your skin is pure agony. Every brush of your ass against his pelvis has you throbbing. You stare wide-eyed into the darkness, gaze roaming the pitch black, as if something out there could make you forget about the ever-growing desire you feel for Joel. 

You can’t sleep like this.

It seems like Joel can though, appearing to already be deep in slumber. He hasn’t moved in a few minutes, his exhales even and slow against you. 

You try to ignore the wetness between your legs, ignore the instinctual urge to roll your hips back against him. You should just go to sleep. But this ache you feel, pounding and deep and relentless…You have to do something about it, even with Joel holding you close.

He won’t mind…right?

But how are you supposed to touch yourself with Joel’s hand in the way? 

You could just move it. That’s the right thing to do, but it feels too good, so hot and heavy on you that you just don’t want to, and as a result, an idea so absolutely fucked worms its way into your mind, lust and desperation destroying any last semblance of rational thought. You could…

No. No. You can’t do that. He’s a human fucking being, not a hand shaped vibrator. 

But… you really want to, and he’s asleep so…he won’t even know…right?

You make up your mind and slowly curl your fingers around Joel’s deadweight palm, biting your lip in concentration and shame as you carefully urge his hand further into your shorts. After each nudge of his palm, you wait to see if Joel gives you any sign of him being awake. But he’s dead asleep. After a moment, you keep going. 

This is so fucked, but you can’t bring yourself to care when you finally feel his thick fingers brush over your clothed folds.

“Shit,” you whisper, breathlessly, holding back a whimper. You manipulate his hand so that his palm is resting large and warm over your aching clit, while his index and middle finger are placed heavily above your heat. 

And then, you really say fuck you to your morals. 

You give an experimental thrust of your hips into his palm, shuddering at the contact against your clit. Then you wait to see if Joel reacts, your head tilting a bit to look over your shoulder. But Joel hasn’t moved, hasn’t said a word. Good.

Confident he won’t wake, you rock your hips again and again, holding onto his hand with your own, pressing it down with each thrust of your hips to get that sweet contact. The heel of his palm bumps your aching clit with each thrust, and you bite back moans and whimpers well enough, but you can’t hide the deepening of your breaths as you climb closer and closer to your climax.

Everything else fades away as you just focus on that one goal. On crawling over the edge. You hardly feel the growing smirk pressed to the back of your neck, or the way Joel’s cock is now hard against your ass as you grind against his palm.

“F-fuck,” you huff, eyes tightly shut as you ground yourself in his presence behind you, the beat of his heart thudding against your spine, the rise and fall of his chest, the light, unconscious brush of his lips on your neck. Closure is on the horizon as you imagine him lifting up on his arm and leaning over to actually get you off, his teeth biting down on your shoulder as he thrusts his fingers into your aching cunt. 

“Joel—“ you quietly moan. 

The moment his name slips from your lips, his hand suddenly pulls back, and you let out a frustrated groan (he can’t do that!), which quickly turns into a squeak of mortification (oh yes, he absolutely can!).

Because Joel is awake. 

He. Is. Awake.

And he knows what you were doing, his chest rumbling against your spine as he—is he fucking laughing at you?

“Needy girl, aren’t you, peach?”

Mortification ignites in your cheeks, nausea pooling in your stomach. “Joel, oh my god, I’m so sorry—“

His hand gravitates to your thigh, curling around it. He pulls it up, inserting his knee in between your legs and he griiiinds it into your clothed cunt. Your desperate apology is cut off by a reflexive wanton moan, your back arching as pleasure reverberates inside you.

“‘S okay, baby, I understand. So fuckin’ desperate you had to use me while I was sleepin’, huh? Didn’t get what you wanted earlier so now you’re searchin’ for somethin’ else, hm?”

His large hand finds your waist again, sliding down your stomach to inch beneath both your shorts and your panties now. You gasp as his fingertips find your clit easily.

“I’m just a ‘lil offended I wasn’t your first choice,” he chides, fingers slipping through your soaking folds. “But I like this much better than you findin’ some boy to get you off. You need’a be fucked by a man, darlin’. Ain’t that right?” 

His words send heat straight to your core, thighs clenching around his knee as he ruts it against you while simultaneously stimulating your clit with his fingers.

“Yes, Joel,” you moan. “Need you.” 

His teeth scrape against your throat when he growls, “Goddamn right you do.”

You can’t believe this is happening.

Joel slides his hand further into your panties, his middle finger curling in to sink into your soaked cunt. You choke on a gasp. 

“Who’s the guy?” He asks, randomly, while his finger rocks into you.

You can’t think as Joel inserts his ring finger alongside the other, stretching you so deliciously. “W-what?”

“The boy you were gonna see tonight. Who is he?” 

Who was it? Mark? Matt? And why does he care? You don’t know, you don’t care, only thoughts of Joel Joel Joel consume your waking being. 

“I—I don’t know, Joel. Please, oh my god.” 

He hums pityingly. “Poor thing can't even remember his name.” His other hand comes up to slide through your hair, gripping the locks at the nape of your neck. He tugs, and you melt. “I’ll make sure you don’t forget mine.” 

He doesn’t need to worry about that.

Joel moves his thumb to circle your clit as he thrusts his thick, long fingers up and into you, curling them to hit that spot that has your heartbeat dropping between your thighs, desperate and loud and begging for release. 

“Hhhoh— Joel!” 

“Tha’s right, baby. So goddamn wet. You’ve been dealin’ with this for awhile now, huh?”

You nod into the pillow on a broken moan as his fingers withdraw and sink into you at a steady pace, his thumb circling and circling and circling.

“Words, baby.”

You cry out, hands gripping the pillow. “Yes, yes. Joel. Been wanting this f’so long.”

“Should’a come to me first. Would’a helped you out a long time ago,” he drawls.

Yes you absolutely should have, based on how quickly you’re approaching your orgasm.

Your cries are so loud, but you don’t care, focusing only on your pleasure and the feel of Joel’s mouth on your throat. 

You’re finally getting what you want. And fuck, is it amazing.

Your eyes roll back as it all builds up inside you, Joel’s hand unrelenting as he fucks you closer and closer to the edge.

You’re scorching, everything hot and intense, your stomach tightening, your legs stretching out as the pleasure builds and builds.

Fuck, you’re gonna cum—

It rips through you violently, eyes prickling with tears, your thighs clenching as your walls bare down repeatedly around Joel’s fingers, making him groan. 

“Good girl,” Joel murmurs, hand eventually inching out of you and your shorts to squeeze your thigh appreciatively as aftershocks run through you, thighs quaking and clit throbbing. “That’s what you needed, huh? S’it feel good, cummin’ all over my fingers?”

His fucking voice!

“Mhmm,” you hum in agreement, sinking into the sheets, eyes drooping shut as pleasure lulls you to sleep. 

He tsks, “Wake up, darlin’ I ain’t done with you yet.”

His beard scrapes against your neck as he moves to your ear.

“It’s my turn to use you.”

Your eyes shoot open. Fuck. 

Joel pulls your panties down your legs as far as he can, and you squirm to wriggle them off of you.

He pulls away for a moment, but when he’s back, the bare, hot, thick length of him is pressed between your ass cheeks, and a full body shudder runs through you.

Holy shit, he’s big.

He grips your thigh again, but this time he throws it over his own. And then you feel it, the slick head of his cock as he guides it through your folds.

Oh fuck.

“You okay, peach?” He asks, laying a gentle kiss on your shoulder. Now you have tears in your eyes for an entirely different reason. His hand slides across your waist and up beneath the hem of your shirt, palming your breast. Your nipples tighten. 

Your mouth feels dry and you swallow down a lump of lava. “Y-yes, Joel.”

“Good. Wanna give you all of me, how’s that sound, darlin’?”

You will take whatever, anything you can get from Joel.

“Good, Joel. Yes, please, oh my god.”  

“There are those manners.”

A desperate whine slips from your lips as he directs the head of his cock into you, slowly and carefully, his hand running up and down your thigh in comforting strokes. God, he’s stretching you so much, hot and thick and pulsing inside you. It’s almost painful, but it’s a welcome pain.

“Jesus, Joel,” you moan when he stops to let you breathe, “You’re so big.”

“I ain’t even halfway in yet, darlin’.”

“W-what?” How is that even possible? 

“You can take it.” He says, sliding in some more and fuck you don’t have much of a choice. but you can, and you will because he feels too fucking good, and you’re ready for him to make you feel it into next week.

“Is…is it all the way in yet?” You ask, thoroughly stretched and filled. 

“Almost, sweet girl,” he breathes. “Goddamn, you’re tight.”

That makes you clench down even more, and he releases a pained groan behind you. “Relax, darlin’, c’mon.”

You do your best and let yourself sink into the bed, taking deep breaths and concentrating on the crackling of the fire.

And then, he thrusts fully into you, filling you up completely, and your mind is right back to him, a soft cry slipping from your lips into the pillow.

 “There we go, tha’s it. Good job. Taking me so well,” he croons, stroking your side.

“F-fuck me, Joel, please move.”

He squeezes your ass in his large palm in retaliation to your command. “You use me, I use you, remember?”

But he listens anyway, likely desperate to move himself, because then he’s gripping your hip with a large hand and pulling back just to sheath himself fully into you once more, his cock head bumping against your cervix, and holy fucking shit.

“Joel!” You cry, and he leans over to kiss you, teeth biting at your plump lower lip as he thrusts into you again.

And again.

And again.

And again.

He rolls into you at a steady, bruising pace, and you’re practically boneless as you just take it. Cries and whimpers and moans spilling out of you like a gas leak as he mouths down your throat, sucking and biting and oh my god this is way better than just getting yourself off on his hand. 

Then Joel shifts, pushing at your side to press your stomach into the mattress. You whine as he pulls out of you to situate himself behind you. He grabs your hips with both hands and pulls them up and backwards, easing himself back into you until your ass meets his skin, then he rolls his hips, driving his cock deep from a brand new angle.

All you can do is sob into the pillow. 

He’s so fucking big, so fucking deep you can’t think of anything else besides him and his wonderful cock, or the filthy things he’s whispering into your shoulder blades.

His large hand plants itself on your spine, and your hands scramble for purchase on a pillow.

“Sweet girl, taking me so fuckin’ well,” he purrs. “You were desperate for this cock, huh? God, I wish you could see yourself. Split open on me like this. Your little boy toy wouldn’t be able to fuck you like this, ain’t that right?"

You shake your head. God, why did you even make that dick appointment in the first place?

You hadn’t even realized what being fucked by a “real man” meant until now.

Joel knows how to fucking deliver, you guess that’s why he’s so successful in his contracting business. He’s delivering you straight to that blessed release. 

You clench around the girth of him, the filthy sounds of your arousal echoing in his room along with the cracks and snaps from the fire burning steadily in the hearth.

If you couldn’t sleep before, you definitely will be able to after this because you’re mindless as he fucks you into oblivion.

“Joel, fuck—mmph—!” 

“Yeah, that’s right. Can’t say anythin’ but my name.”

His breathing has become more labored, desperate grunts escaping his lips as his cock twitches inside of you. He’s getting close, deep and gravely moans falling out of him as his thrusts become harder and more sporadic.

His hand sneaks around your front, spanning your entire stomach as he slides down to your soaking folds, his middle and ring finger finding that sensitive bundle of nerves and giving them a gentle tap before circling, using that same method from before that had you squirming.

You writhe on his length, legs falling out beneath you as your orgasm swells within you. 

“Please Joel,” you whimper into the pillow. 

“I’ve got you,” he promises. 

It’s there, filling your body, building and cresting and searing white-hot through your limbs. 

And then he thrusts a certain way, hitting that spot within you, and his fingers are circling and—

Yeah.

You fall boneless to the mattress as you come apart, your arousal coating Joel’s cock as he continues to fuck you through your release, stroking your spine. Pleasure floods through your body as the tension releases, and tears freely fall as you cry into the pillow.

Because goddamn it!

How can something feel so good? 

And then Joel’s pulling out of you and letting loose a long, satisfied moan as he comes all over your back, hot stripes painting you. 

He collapses next to you, groaning something about his back.

And you can’t help but laugh, delirious and soft, and Joel’s laughing too, brown eyes sparkling. His calloused hand comes up, runs his thumb along your jaw, and he’s smiling at you, soft and unlike anything you’ve ever seen before.

“You alright, peach?”

“Ohhh yeah,” you giggle, sighing with contentment.

You’re gonna be feeling this for days, just like you wanted.

Joel’s lips brush against your forehead gently, and you’re too tired to acknowledge it, slumber pulling you under far too quickly. You think you can feel the gentle swipe of a wet washcloth on your back before you pass out.

-----

“Fuck…”

The bed is empty when you wake, and a spike of anxiety shoots through you as you sit up. A fire still crackles in the hearth, a fresh log dropped in the ash. On the night stand is a note, beneath it, one of Joel’s t-shirts, your jeans, and a pair of your underwear. 

Mortification climbs through you as you read:

Peach,

My bathroom’s on the left if you’d like to shower. I hope you don’t mind, I went through your bag to get you some panties  underwear. Lot of books in there. You sure like to read.

Oh god, he found your erotica stack. The covers are not misleading, either, he definitely knows what kind of books they are. You force yourself to keep reading through the humiliation.

I’m out picking up Sarah and Ellie, I’ll be home soon. There’s pancakes on the counter. We’ll tow your car when I get back.

Also–about last night…we don’t have to talk about it, if you don’t want to. But, I want you to know that if you ever need something like that again, I’m here. And for anything else. I’m here. Always. 

See you soon. 

Warmth fills your body and you reread those last sentences over and over. 

Always. Does he really mean that? 

You check the alarm clock on his nightstand–it’s eleven fucking a.m. Holy shit, you haven’t slept that late in a long time. 

When you stand, an ache radiates through you, and memories of last night flit in your mind and along with them, a fresh new wave of arousal. You scramble for the shower.

You emerge fresh and clean twenty minutes later, smelling like Joel, having only his body wash and shampoo to use. Each inhale is practically torture, and the ache between your legs is just another reminder. Seeing yourself in his shirt makes it worse. You try and push it away.

You descend the steps, halting when you hear the sound of Ellie’s voice from the kitchen.

“And I was like, pew pew! And I got both of them out!”

Sarah’s scoff of disbelief follows. “Nuh-uh! You didn’t even hit me!”

You creep down the steps, smiling a bit at Ellie’s outcry of “Yes I fucking did!”, and then you hear it–Joel’s low laugh, the Texan drawl.

“You kiddos are gonna drive me crazy. Just eat your damn pancakes.”

“Why’d you make these in the first place? You don’t even like pancakes,” Sarah teases. 

“Uh…”

You decide you should probably help him out. “Hey girls.”

Three heads snap in your direction. The eyes of one skirting down your body, a blush creeping across his cheeks. The other two brighten in shock. 

“What are you doing here!” Ellie gasps. 

“We haven’t seen you in forever!” Sarah adds.

You enter the kitchen and come up behind them to pull them in for a hug, your arms hooking around their necks. You smush their cheeks against yours. Ellie grumbles, Sarah laughs.

“I know! I’ve missed you guys so much. I’m just super busy with being an adult and all that shit,” you say, letting them go so they can breathe. You round the island, grabbing a plate and stacking two pancakes on it.

“Well, stop being busy. We miss you,” Ellie says.

“If I could, I would.”

“Why are you wearing Dad’s shirt?” Sarah asks, eyes narrowing, a mischievous smile pulling at her lips.

“I–um–” the question catches you off guard, and you scramble for an excuse, eyes flicking to Joel desperately. He clears his throat and crosses his arms over his broad chest, now covered in yet another, dark flannel. How many does he own?

“Snowstorm stranded her here last night, and she didn’t have any clean clothes,” Joel says, definitively.

It’s not a lie at all, and yet, it feels like one.

Sarah and Ellie exchange a look that says, yeah fucking right. You shovel pancake into your mouth to try and cool down the blush in your cheeks. 

“Speakin’ of,” he continues, “I’ve got the tow dolly all hooked up so when you’re done, we can tow your car out.”

“Great. Thank you, Joel.”

His brown eyes flick between yours, his hand coming up to rest large and warm on your shoulder. “‘Course, sweetheart.” 

You finish your pancakes without any more embarrassing questions from the girls, thank God, and then you’re out in the snow wearing a pair of Joel’s boots stuffed with socks (they’re too big, but they’re better than heels) and bundled up in one of his coats, watching Joel tow your tiny car out of the snowbank.

It’s just as cold as yesterday, though the dreary sky has cleared into a baby blue, the sun bright and high above the clouds. The roads are clearer, the snow plows having come by not too long ago. 

You grimace as you hear your car groan and creak as Joel pulls it out of the snow, big puffs of it falling off the roof in clumps. Eventually, it’s on solid ground once more, and he tows it back toward his cabin. 

Back in the driveway, Joel hops out of his truck and double checks your car. He pats the roof of it when he deems it accetable. “All good to go, sweetheart.”

You sigh in relief, “Thank you so much Joel, seriously.”

He nods, though he looks…nervous for some reason. “‘Course, darlin’. Glad I could help.”

You don’t really want to leave, but you’ve bothered him long enough, so you stroll to the driver's side and go to open it, but suddenly Joel’s hand comes down to keep it closed. You look up at him confused. 

His expression is hard, serious as he looks down at you. “Do you regret last night?”

Well. You were not expecting that. You thought that, maybe, it would just remain undiscussed. A blip. Something you both shared, but never spoke of again. You know your answer, though.

 “No. I don’t.”

“Good,” he says, eyes dark, “me either.”

He opens the door for you, pauses for a second then shuts it, voice desperate. “I just need to say this, before you go.”

You nod, encouraging him to go on.

He takes a deep breath, rakes a hand through his graying locks. Pinches the bridge of his nose, and shuts his eyes tight. When he opens them again, there's a hard determination in them. Your pulse quickens, your legs turn to jelly.

“I like you, peach,” he says. “I understand if you don’t want to be with me because of the whole single father thing. And, also because I’m me. But I just thought I’d tell you how I felt, because,” he huffs out a laugh, shakes his head, “I’m thinkin’ you might like me, too.”

Your hands are shaking, and not because of the cold. Maybe you should buy a lottery ticket with how lucky you've been these past fifteen hours.

“I’ve liked you since the moment I met you, Joel," you confess. 

“Oh,” he says, breathless, and a smile pulls at his lips.

“Yeah,” you breathe, your own grin forming to match his. 

The breeze shakes the evergreens, drifting flakes of snow onto Joel’s graying hair. His nose is reddened by the biting cold, but his eyes are warm as he smiles down at you. 

“Not gonna lie to you sweetheart, I’m kind of glad you got stranded here.”

"Yeah, me too," you laugh, and then you pull him down to you, pressing your lips against his, smiling into the kiss.

This kiss is the exact opposite of the one he gave you last night. It’s careful, sweet, tentative. He reveres your mouth, rather than ravishes it. You’re both bundled in multiple layers, standing in the freezing cold rather than lying naked in a warm bed. 

And yet, it’s just as perfect, if not more.

Eventually Joel pulls back, hands heavy on your waist. He’s still grinning. His hands frame your face, his thumb running softly along your cheekbone. 

“Peach,” he says. “Would you like to stay for dinner?”

[777heavengirl]

Leave

poa!remus lupin x healer!reader one-shot ! warnings: angst ? mentions of war and death, eventual fluff word count: 4,014 masterlist

Remus Lupin was a handsome man. You had always known this, ever since fifth year when you got paired up with him in potions. It became your new favorite subject. He was not only gorgeous but bright and sharp as a whip. You could hear his sarcastic and witty comments from under his breath often, and the giggles that bubbled out of you were hard to contain. You had considered yourself decent friends, sharing more than one class with him and opting often to work together throughout your time at Hogwarts. He was even the reason you were a part of the order of the phoenix as the war broke out. 

It was a dark time, the insecurity and the panic. The sheer paranoia that draped over everyone like a coat made of lead. You lost contact as the war ended. His best friends were dead, or traitors. His family was dead and as far as you knew he retreated until the only mention of him was the pictures on your walls. You hadn’t laid eyes on the man for twelve years. 

But Remus Lupin was still a handsome man. Older barely, tired definitely. As Dumbledore introduced him as the new defense against the dark arts professor you couldn’t help but gawk. His shy smile was the same, a small curl of his lip as he looked sheepishly at the crowd of children. His light brown hair was longer than the last time you had seen him. He shaved it the year Harry was born, you always thought he looked quite good with the buzz. Matter of fact he had asked you to shave it for him. You’d never forget the trust he had in you at that moment, nor the feel of his head, his face in your hands. 

You had started your post as a secondary healer at Hogwarts around the same time Harry Potter turned 11. Albus insisted Madame Pomfrey needed the help, and as a trusted witch and now experienced and skilled healer after many years at St Mungo’s, you were the one for the job. After much bonding with the Potter boy, as he had the terrible habit of always needing medical care along with his friends you started to tell him, stories of his mother, of his father, and your time together at school. You suspected Albus Dumbledore was playing a game of chess. Remus’s appearance was no different. Maybe he was trying to introduce the boy to his parent’s old friends. Show him the love and care his parents had fostered with others. The way James and Lily cared for their friends like family, until their last seconds.

Lily Evans had been, until the day of her death, one of your closest friends. The two of you were basically inseparable, she always said muggle-borns needed to stick together. This closeness is what made your friendship with Remus so easy. It was like two overlapping circles of friends perfectly lining up, creating one. This also made it easy to fall in love with him. Lily always encouraged it, you could still hear the smile on her face as she spoke warmly about the man, how perfect he was for you.

Lily loved Remus. You suspected this was also the reason for his absence. Everyone deals with grief differently.

Or maybe he just really had no care for you after all?

You shook the thought away as you did your nightly duties. It was nearing the end of the first week of classes and you hadn’t dared talk to Remus. You were trying to come to terms with the undeniable fact that maybe it was best that you didn’t reconnect. He could teach from his classroom on his side of the castle and you could heal children from yours. Not in a bad way, but maybe in the way two people avoid each other because of too much shared pain. Because maybe looking at each other meant acknowledging how alone you were. It’s not like he had even looked at you either. You wondered if he thought of you. 

You thought of Lily as you cleaned. She’d huff at you if she heard your thoughts. 

“Ah yes Ms Y/L/N,” Dumbledore walked in, Remus in tow. The soft brown, wool sweater he wore made your heart clench. He looked like he always did, he looked like the Remus you grew up with. Not the stuffier professor robes you had seen him wearing around. “I do believe you are familiar with Professor Lupin’s-”

”predicament” Remus muttered but in the silence of the night it was clear as day. 

”ah yes, ever so verbose, the professor, but you are aware yes?” 

Of course, you knew, you had helped him post-full moon before while you were training to be a healer. While the war felt like it would blow down your doors at any minute. you simply nodded. You resumed your task of folding the sheets, opting to do it with your hands.

You were afraid to look at him, but you knew what Dumbledore would ask.

”I trust you can make sure he’s in good shape each month then?”

You smiled softly at the headmaster, “of course sir, i’ll tend to him when needed” Dumbledore smiled and nodded as he turned, patting Remus’s shoulder as he passed and disappeared into the castle's darkness.

You could feel Remus tense up as you were left alone, you felt suffocated even in the expansiveness of the hospital wing. 

“I have all the moon dates in my calendar professor,” the words felt foreign coming from your mouth but you couldn’t bring yourself to say his name. “so please don’t hesitate to tell me what arrangement you’d prefer I can go up to your room the morning after or if you feel like coming down as well”

Remus shifted on his feet as you spoke. He stared hard at the windows but he suspected you were also avoiding his gaze. 

“I think I can make it up here, don’t worry I’ll probably be okay,” You hummed, shooting him a tightlipped smile as he bowed his head and left. Your eyes never met. 

Remus felt like he might suffocate at any moment. His skin felt hot under his collar and he couldn’t remember if he had looked at you at all. He tried to picture your face. Had it aged at all? Had you changed? He could only think back to when you buzzed his head thirteen years ago. Your wide smile as the two of you laughed at his falling locks. It had been cathartic at the time, and he could still feel the ghost of your fingers over his face, over his head.

It was a fleeting thought, a flash of a life he had forgotten he had lived. Twelve years is an awfully long time, to not see someone.

He wondered how you had dealt with all of it. With the losses, with the absence of everyone you loved. He could feel regret worm its way into his heart. He had left you alone. You were each other's remaining friends. There was no longer anyone else, Lily and James, Marlene, and Dorcas were all dead. He presumed Mary was dead as well. Frank and Alice weren’t there anymore, not mentally.

He knew you took care of them. At St Mungo’s. He caught a glimpse of you once as you came into their room. Remus had just gone to visit, talk to them, and bring them flowers. Even if they didn’t seem to recognize him, Alice was entranced by the Lillies he brought. He felt content enough about it as he walked away, but then you walked into the room after. He knew you hadn't seen him, but he peeked in to observe you. With your nice smile and your caring gaze, you checked up on them, made sure they had been fed, ran through a small (although futile) therapeutic exercise with them, and put on a charm so the flowers wouldn’t wilt, so they make you happy for a long time Alice. Remus hated the pang of pain in his heart. He always knew you would become a good healer. He didn’t want to disrupt your life. You seemed well-adjusted. Or at least he hoped you were, but that was just the outside, and the outside doesn’t always reflect the inside.

Remus knew this especially well.  

-

This arrangement between you was barely touched on. Remus had come in only once in the two months that had passed for a small scrape on his neck. It made your fingers itch in anticipation. It was like you needed to feel needed. You knew he wasn't having the best time. He looked pale and ill and you fought the urge to drop something off at his door. 

"Severus I need to know if you're giving him Wolfsbane" You disliked dealing with Severus Snape. You didn't trust him. Not since the incident with Lily in fifth year. And rightfully so. Regardless of the headmaster's unwavering faith in him, you were convinced he was going to screw with Remus and his job. Whether payback for things in the past or simple jealousy. 

"I don't see how that's any of your business," He sneered at you as he turned away, walking down the dark empty halls of the dungeon's hallways. 

"I'm his nurse-"

"He won't even let you treat him, and if you knew what was good for you," he crossed his arms. You felt as useless as when he and Lily had started arguing in fourth year. "You'd forget about him, its pathetic-" 

You knew it was pointless to speak to the man. You often pondered if he saw glimpses of Lily in you just as you saw them in him.

You huffed as the two of you walked your separate ways. You felt sixteen again. Mindlessly, you walked to the defense against the dark arts tower. It wasn't a section of the castle you found yourself in often or at all anymore, your days as a student had long passed. You focused on the stone stairs. You felt like your hands were clammy and freezing at the same time. You didn't know if you were overstepping a boundary. 

Classes had finished for the day, the kids ran around the castle, some greeting you some not. You didn't mind. You knocked softly at his office door with your knuckles. You suddenly felt insecure about your red robes and white apron, it was nearly identical to Poppy Pomfrey's. She said something about yours having a younger silhouette. Whatever the hell that meant. 

"Come in," Remus's voice called out through the door. You turned the door knob hesitantly. You couldn't help but stare at the artifacts and books thrown and placed about. "Ah, welcome"

"I'm sorry for the intrusion," you still didn't dare say his name, it was stuck in your throat like a bubble of water and air that forms when you drink too fast. You felt like you might choke. "I just needed to know if you were taking a certain potion-"

Remus nodded, an understanding smile playing on his lips. 

"I am,"

"Okay good," you trailed off as you finally looked at him straight on. His hands had stopped their task, ink-dipped feather placed back on his desk as he also stared at you. You fiddled with your fingers behind your back. "I'm sorry, Severus wouldn't answer my question and I needed to know so as to not give you anything that might react poorly-"

"It's alright," Remus bit his lip slightly, you could tell he was bouncing his leg from under his desk.

"I'll take my leave then" you turned away from him. 

"Y/N" you stopped at the door, the cold metal handle cooling your hand. "D'you want some tea?"

You couldn't say no. Not to him. So you turned back and nodded. 

Remus smiled softly, seemingly relieved. 

-

Your tea time with Remus had been filled with content silence. Neither of you felt the urge to speak, it was a comfortable stillness as you sat side by side looking out his window. You didn't feel the need to express anything or address the twelve years that you were absent from each other's lives.

This felt enough for now. 

As the sun set you left, with a thank you and a small smile. He mirrored it. You felt like a bit of weight had been lifted and you spent the rest of the night with a small smile on your face. 

The next few weeks went along about the same, healer duties with the bonus of Remus passing by the hospital wing later on and having tea silently or you seeking him out in his office. You were afraid to talk, like you'd ruin it if you did. You felt as if your desperation to erase the last twelve years of silence and solitude might consume you.

But the full moon came around again and you desperately hoped Remus would come in the morning. For you to fuss over him, to make sure he was properly fed, to give him whatever sweets he wanted. You wanted to kiss the scars on his face as you once did, to run your fingers through his hair as you reassured him that it was over, that he was okay. Even if he kept his consciousness thanks to the potion, transformations were rough on him. You hadn't been able to even close your eyes.

You heard a knock on your door. You briefly glanced at the clock on your desk, 5:30 AM. Remus was out of it. And probably outside your door. You scrambled from your bed, closing the distance between you and the door, and cracked it open. Sure enough, the brown-haired man stood there, with his greenish-pale face and clammy skin.

"I'm sorry-"

"Remus please-" You dragged him inside, quickly directing him towards your bed. You made sure he laid down while you assessed him for any accidental injuries. As you got to work Remus watched you, the way you muttered to yourself as you read the labels to potions and serums to try and help him. Your dark blue silk gown flowed down your body, reaching right over your knee. It reminded him of a river at night. The lighter blue robe loosely tied around you pooled around ur feet as u crouched next to your medicine box. 

“Here drink this, it should make you feel better,” you say next to him, one leg tucked under your thigh, the other hanging from the side of the bed. You brought the small vial up to his lips, one hand under his head to try to bring him up. The green liquid tasted slightly bitter but he drank the whole vial without reproach. 

Remus sighed as he felt his body warm. You got up again, opening and closing cabinets, muttering to yourself again. You found a chocolate bar and a cloth with a sigh and walked briskly back to his side. Remus felt sadness bubble up from deep within. He thought of you all alone for so many years, he watched your face as you dabbed a warm damp cloth around his face. He hadn’t noticed before, how you didn’t look all that older. Tired, yes, beautiful, always. Last time he had seen you, the two of you were freshly 21 and you felt like you would eat the world raw. Now you were 33. Most people your age haven’t seen half of what you had. You had a frown on your face, and your eyes reflected a deep sorrow. 

You were so young. Remus thought of your time apart. He couldn't rationalize that he had lived so long without you.

You were both still so young.

”I’m sorry,” Remus couldn’t help saying it

”You don’t have to apologize for anything Rem,” your voice was barely above a whisper, you conjured some water in the glass on your bedside table. You went to help him drink from it and he grabbed it from your hand, sitting up.

“I do though,” his eyebrows stitched together in worry, he placed the cup back in its original spot. He couldn’t help but look away “I left-“

Your hands dropped onto your lap, you felt like your heart was falling out of your chest.

”You didn’t owe me anything, we just drifted-“

”Love you know that’s not true,” your head spun at the nickname, you hadn’t heard it come out of his mouth in so long. Old habits die hard. “I left you alone and we’re all the other has left.”

He shook his head and felt his eyes fill with tears. You could feel the tears start falling from yours as well.

”It’s my fault I should’ve tried harder-“ Remus laughed in indignation.

”Y/N it is not your fault,” as you tried to talk, to somehow convince him and yourself that your distance had been your doing, that you had been the one to cut him off, the one to leave, he grabbed your hand. “I was the one that stopped answering calls and the door, I moved away, I’m the one that did everything in my power to not think about what had happened and that included leaving you-"

Remus couldn't help but think the worst of himself, as he saw the tears stain your cheeks and your nose redden. You were full-on crying now, clutching his hand like he would vanish into thin air. Remus Lupin was someone who left. He knew this, he always had been, as a kid he ran from his problems. From his lycanthropy, from his mother's illness in his teenage years, from his father's sadness. He ran then, spending holidays at Hogwarts where he could pretend that the only thing that plagued him was the full moon, moving in with Sirius and Peter right after graduation. Being the first one out of the door after they had to go their separate ways for safety.

He was still a man that left. He left you as the both of you stood alone in the ruins of the family you had all built. He ran as far as he could. 

Remus Lupin was someone who left. And he feared that the look on your face now would forever make his heart bleed. Because how could he have let himself leave you?

But you didn't see that, and if you did you didn't hold it against him. Your tear-ridden eyes shone when you looked at him. He felt like he might suffocate under your gaze. He wanted nothing more than to kiss you, for all the years he didn't, for all the times he almost did. Remus Lupin wanted to kiss you more than anything else in the world. 

That could wait, he had already waited a lifetime anyway.

He pulled your arm until your body collided with his chest, heart to heart. His hand pressed your head close to him, your hands gripping his soft sweater until your knuckles turned white. He buried his face in your hair as you both cried, sobs trembling through both your chests. Your knees on the bed as your top half lay on top of him. You didn't care, the only thing you could think about was how he was here now, how he held you, and the way his hand rubbed up and down your back. 

"Please never leave Remus," the words managed to escape you between sobs, and he could hardly manage to croak out a never again.

And he never would. Remus vowed to himself, at this moment with you in his arms, he'd never let go again.

He'd never leave.

-

It had become a habit for the two of you, to seek each other's comfort. You'd wonder what it felt like to kiss him. Although you were close now, there seemed to be a line neither of you would cross. Wary of the other's reaction. You figured that maybe after so many years any romantic interest in you had dissipated. 

So the habit persisted, he'd come beaten and battered after a full moon, Severus's potion-making is quite unreliable, isn't it? You figured he did it on purpose. And you'd patch the brown-haired man, only then would he pull you into his arms. Remus was soft and pliable, the exhaustion of the transformation made him melt into your body and your bed. He more often than not dragged himself to your room, even when the full moon was far, even when he felt good. He would make his way to your room, and you'd always greet him with your arms wide open and ready to press your bodies together until you fell asleep. He'd usually be gone by morning.

It was December now,  and the cold made his joints feel brittle and ache. 

He had gone directly to your room after dinner, he couldn't help but watch you as you got ready for bed. He stripped down from his robes until he was only in a loose white tee and a pair of joggers he had permanently left in your room. The aches that resonated through him often made you forget that Remus Lupin was still a young man. You were only 33. The remainders of youth highlighted the shape of his body as he threw himself on your bed. The white tee shifted upwards with his arms revealing slivers of his torso. You couldn't help but look through your mirror as you brushed your hair. 

Your dynamic had become somewhat domestic, he'd watch you get ready and pull you into his arms to sleep together. You felt like a silly teenager, playing house. Like this was the life you were supposed to live, the soft music pouring from the record player, a soft song you heard many years ago. The type of song that makes nostalgia and melancholy settle in your heart. This was it, the life you were supposed to live was the way Remus crossed the room and pulled you by the hand. The way his arm pulled you close and you slow danced, laughing at the way you tumbled around. You deserved a soft life, one with chocolate frogs and slow rhythms. A life with laughter and joy, of feeling unjudged, of feeling safe and warm. 

A life full of love.

And as Remus spun you around and laughter poured from both your lips you couldn't help but feel your heart swell. It felt like a warm flower bloomed in your chest as you looked at his smiling face. He slowed your spinning around the room as the song came to a close but you remained in his arms, you could feel the tip of his fingers tug slightly at a lock of your hair. You couldn't help but smile up at him between giggles. 

"Can I kiss you?" his words were merely a whisper, like a ghost of desire. And you couldn't help but smile even wider, pulling his neck down to press your lips against his soft ones. He tasted of spearmint and chocolate, and you couldn't help but break into a smile, lips still pressed onto his. He leaned back, holding your face between his large hands. Laughter bubbled from his lips as he leaned in for a second kiss, head spinning, his lips soft but firm. He dragged his lips to your cheeks, pressing pecks on the apples of your cheeks, on your jaw, on your neck. Laughter bounced between the two of you.

Fifteen years of desire piled up to one kiss. 

This life was the one you deserved.