#Together In A Broken World
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I got the Kindle to read on the train, the paperback to read in bed, and the hardback for that cool wraparound cover. Too bad I donāt enjoy listening to audiobooks or Iād have a full set!Ā
#Paul Michael Winters#together in a broken world#books#new books#bookstagram#dystopian books#dystopian fiction#lgbtq romance#lgbtq books#queer books#queer romance#mlm romance
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Interesting New Releases āØ
Goddess Of The River: reimagining of the story of Ganga, goddess of the river, and her doomed mortal son In Tongues: a young gay man upends the lives of a powerful art-world couple Keepers Of The Stones & Stars: a witty, YA epic fantasy about a cheeky quintet of teens chosen by magical gems to save the world
The Lamplighter: A historical feminist horror in a small whaling village Land Of No Regrets: A story of four students who find hope and kinship amidst the challenges of growing up at a harrowing Madrasa in rural Ontario Lost Ark Dreaming: A Snowpiercer style class divide dystopia, set in West Africa
Together in a Broken World: Two boys fall in love in a deadly world, but itās the secrets they keep that might kill them Trust & Safety: a couple becomes entangled with a queer couple living the dream life
#booklr#books#new releases#new books#goddess of the river#keepers of the stones and stars#together in a broken world
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#BookReview #TogetherInABrokenWorld by #PaulMichaelWinters #Pacific&Court
NineStar Press Publishing date: May 21, 2024Ā Good Reads Summary Two boys fall in love in a deadly world, but itās the secrets they keep that might kill them. Seventeen-year-old Zach was visiting his uncle in a small Montana town when a mysterious illness ripped through the world. Most died, but those who survived the Infection became mindless killers, spreading the disease with a singleā¦
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#LGBTQ+#ninestar press#Pacific & Court#Paul Michael Winters#post apocalypse#Together In A Broken World#YA
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The parallels between Hananene and Mitsukou!??!? Mitsunene dreaming of leaving everything behind, just the two of them, not bothering to think about the how or what comes after, only wanting to be happy and carefree with their partners, trying to find a solution no matter how unrealistic so neither of them have to stress anymoreā¦ and Hanakou still cautious and skeptical and so worried, bringing the other back down to earth, thinking of their safety and the future, knowing it will hurt, yet they still go along with their partner in the endā¦
#tbhk spoilers#toilet bound hanako kun#hananene#mitsukou#tbhk 118#tbhk 91#I think someone said that mitsukou are like the new worldās version of hananene which is actually so true and so heartbreaking!!?!?!!!#mitsuba being nene and kou being hanako???#mitsunene want to forget about their problems and think they can live a happy life like that#hanakou think the burden of fixing it falls entirely on their shoulders and refuse to open up#edited the hananene panel just to get the whole scene on one page#but recent chapter reminded me of every time nene has asked hanako to run away with her#(picture perfect and far shore)#hananene vers is a little less magical but same energy#GHRHAJSH mitsukou getting to be actual friends in this timeline šš#their casual touches and the fact theyāre always together?????#i am actually sobbing over it actually Iām broken#jibaku shonen hanako kun#tbhk#jshk
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the way Scully kneels down to Mulderās level to talk to him when heās distressed (and sitting) I donāt know if thatās romantic but itās incredibly loving and tender.
youāre right. because sheās mimicking him. he always gets down to meet her when sheās vulnerable or scared. itās like when she tried to use his first name (which he does when heās trying to connect to her personally) in tooms. sheās doing what makes her feel safe and what makes her feel close to him.
#he is so much bigger than her#and it never shows. sheās always allowed to match him#they have such a space together in a world that wants her to be small and him to be broken#and theyāre both conscious of it#key word: romantic
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Hannibal: Should the universe contract, should time reverse and teacups come together, a place could be made for Abigail in your world. (Ko no mono) Will: [Hannibal: Where does the difference between the past and the future come from?] Mine? Before you and after you. Yours? It's all starting to blur. Mischa. Abigail. Chiyoh. (Dolce)
Hannibal and teacups and time and the rules of disorder: Ko no mono, Mizumono, Primavera, Dolce, Digestivo
Hannibal was born to be a girl dad.
#hannibal#nbc hannibal#hannibal nbc#will graham#hannibal gifs#hannibal lecter#hannigram#murder husbands#abigail hobbs#murder family#hannibal parallels#pesky--dust parallels#pesky--dust gifs#hannibal shitpost#should the universe contract should time reverse and teacups come together a place could be made for abigail in your world#the teacup is broken#teacup#teacups#mischa lecter#abigail reminded me so much of her#why did you kill her?#what happened to abigail had to happen#there was no other way#there was#but there isn't now#hannibal s02e11#ko no mono#mizumono#hannibal s02e13#hannibal s03e02
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Everything about Style is just driving me feral with want to have THK right now, immediately.
The way he's all big, bold gestures and confident swagger; the way his introduction includes a literal arms-wide-open welcome. The overalls unbuttoned until nearly the middle of his chest and how he's the only one in the main cast to be (literally) this uncovered (everyone else has 2-3 layers on).
I wonder if this hints to how vulnerable his character is, narratively speaking: how he potentially is the one that starts out with the least information (apparently Kant doesn't tell him who Fadel and Bison are when he makes that deal with Style?); how he may be the least physically familiar with violence because he's just a mechanic (vs Kant's background with crime/the police. Also the way in the trailer Style is constantly in shock when Fadel does something violent around him); how he chooses with his heart even after he finds out the full truth about Fadel ("You know I know everything").
When he describes his life, it's so... innocent? We get a snapshot of what he thinks his life is about and it's: fixing cars, collecting vintage cars, bowling and hanging out with his best friend. Every other character's answers are layers of subterfuge and double meanings but Style's answers create such a contrast by being so unfiltered. This is a character that (at least at this point) is guileless and without agenda.
I'm so excited to see Style pursing Fadel. I'm so excited to see Fadel try to remain stoic and unmoved in the face of Style's unabashed interest and enthusiastic flirting. I'm excited to discover why Style goes from attraction to being willing to risk it all for Fadel.
But also -- in a very different way than what Kant will doubtless be to Bison -- I'm excited to see how Style will become an escape for Fadel. Fadel, who just wants to sleep for 25 hours (he's so exhausted) and live a normal life, maybe open a restaurant that isn't just a front and a cover for the illicit job he maybe no longer wants, who enjoys solitude but wants to find someone to spend it with (he sounds so desperately lonely, my heart breaks for him).
Someone uncomplicated, who lives life fully, who isn't afraid to go for what he wants and who wears his heart on his sleeve.
In less than 5 minutes, this interview shows us the ways they could fit together like missing puzzle pieces, and I am so, so excited to see it fall apart and come together.
#the heart killers#style#fadel#fadelstyle#also can we talk about how well both joong and dunk embody their characters??#dunk doesn't normally SIT this way when he's in interviews#he's much more relaxed and calm overall and doesn't use as much inflections unless he gets really excited#but all his mannerisms feel in character (or at least true to the Style we see in the trailer)#joong too -- the way he slouches and the almost disinterested air he's projecting#like Fadel doesn't really want to be doing this interview (bc ofc he wouldn't)#the way he keeps defaulting back to linking his hands together like he's got something to hide#his body language is so defensive and all his answers look like they're extremely calculated and thought through#joong is rarely this still in a real interview so this feels very distinctly like a character choice#joongdunk#joong archen#dunk natachai#and even if i wind up being horribly wrong about all of this i'm still so grateful for what we got already and what we will get in THK#as long as they don't end broken up although thats what fanfics are for so even that wouldn't be the end of the world to me xD#also someone please yell with me about how pretty the tiny bit of eyeshadow they added to dunk's eyes makes him look AHHHHH#thk interviews#style meta#thk meta#<my posts>
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in my head, kieran survived the oādriscoll kidnapping, but by the time heād got back to shady belle after someone found him bleeding out in the street and took him to the doctor, the gang was gone, and he took the opportunity to escape the gang lifestyle, running off to strawberry and beginning work with the timber folks
years later, you can find him at pronghorn ranch in epilogue 1, lovingly tending to the horses in the barn when you go to scoop the manure, and heās made an honest living for himself. and the oādriscolls are gone because sadie killed then all and he is finally safe and happy is anyone listening can anyone hear me
#does anyone care where javier fits in here#in my little mind world they run off together but not at the same time#i want to write more about this but i have no idea where to start and this is all i can find the words for at the moment#if my brain can work for a little longer i may reblog w javiās side of this au#it takes him a lot longer to actually buck up and run off but it happens literally right before the pinkertons come to beaver hollow#like he takes the opportunity during the height of the confusion when john renters camp to run off#because john is alive and dutch lied and he misses kieran so much and itās just his last straw#his heart is broken and loyalty matters to him still more than anything but it isnāt dutch heās loyal to anymore#iām literally delusional#autism is a crazy thing cuz why am i literally making up an entire au and constantly thinking abt a ship that literally only 3 people in the#world ship#please put me down i wish i could have gotten hyperfixated on a Normal ship but noooo#itās THIS ONE#someone please indulge me i have so may thinks and thots#rdr2#red dead redemption 2#kieran duffy#javieran#i wonāt tag javi because. heās literally not mentioned in the actual post LOL#text#hero's talking to himself again
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the lack of fandom insanity about aloy hzd is crazy to me.....she was literally born of immaculate conception to be the saviour of a world that doesnt want her. she was the loneliest girl in the world the first and last of her kind. while gay
#she is everything to me!!!!!!!!#went back to my hzd replay and in my feelings currently#also started on burning shores finally and while its good. for reasons known. opening hfw again does remind me#how i feel that it did not do justice to the themes of hzd#manyyyy thoughts on that#one major thing is that the zeniths even existing takes away the fact that up to that point there was absolutely nobody left#from the old world. just recording and emails and broken holograms#not even gaia (!!)#(yes it is very important to me that the gaia in hfw is just a backup copy she is the same program per se but NOT the same gaia#that chose to give life to aloy. out of her love and trust in elisabet. it was actually very impactful imo how that gaia was destroyed#before she could ever speak to aloy. she could nly leave her a message. addressing her as elisabet iirc#which ended on 'i only wish i could hear your voice again' DEAR GOD#anyways the fact that the hfw gaia is NOT the same one. and thats never addressed or anything#just encapsulates the emotional hollowness of hfw compared to hzd#hzd just had this massive all encompasing theme of loneliness. that came together in all aspects of the game#hfw was such a paradigm shift from that it should have been more meaningful#but they got lost in the sauce and ended up with kind of a nothingburger in comparison#hzd was a story hfw was just a game. THERE!!#wow this turned into kind of a rant anyways. aloy girl of all time!!!!#hzd#hfw#aloy
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My dearest, tell me about your conlang scripts, pleaseā£
Yeassss thank you beloved I will now kill for you <3 Ask me to kill for you.
I truly do not know how long this is going to end up but I'm just gonna go for it.
Montaran
Montaran is fauns' native language: it is alphasyllabic (rather than alphabetic), made up of character 'blocks' that are themselves composed of syllabic components. It's based off a mix of Korean and Sanskrit (mostly Brahmi script).
ā¬ļø "This is an example sentence" written in Montaran. Pronounced "Bavna mÅskadatÅk nin."
Components are arranged in blocks of three max, with spaces between words. It's written and read top to bottom, left to right. In three-component characters (called full blocks or complete characters), the arrangement of the components tells you where the syllabic emphasis is.
Here's the same sentence but with the components split up. The first word bavna has it's emphasis on the syllable na, and you can tell by reading because it's alone, as opposed to the other two components, which share space on the top of the block. The second word, MÅskadatÅk, has its emphasis on the first and fourth syllables mÅ and da- the ones that are alone in their vertical placement. For partial blocks, like the last word nin, you can't tell emphasis by reading it.
Montaran is an abugida, which means its alphasyllabary is made up of consonant letters and small, diacritic-like additions that determine vowel sounds. Consonants can exist alone, but vowels must be connected to a consonant.
Where vowels are connected to a consonant can vary- usually there is a standardized method, but handwriting can alter it.
Montaran doesn't use any articles or particles, is written subject-verb-object (though the verb to be is considered an implied verb and therefore not actually written or spoken in sentences which would need it in other languages). Adjectives and adverbs are placed before what they alter.
Homonic
Homonic is humans' native language. It's alphabetic, made up mostly of vowels. The consonants are just 6 'base' ones, the sound of which changes with the inclusion of diacritics. It's based off of mostly English and Japanese.
ā¬ļø "This is an example sentence" written in Homonic. Pronounced "Goa ja ikaruth zonosh hfow."
Likewise I had more explanation for those weird phonetics but once again I am going to joker out so what the fuck ever. The r is a tapped r though.
Consonants base form is considered the default, while the diacritics change what sound it makes. The handakuten indicates a harder sound (P to B, F to V, L to tapped R), the tilde indicates a softer sound (hard G to Y, L to R, F to a sort of harder H that's not quite an english H), and the dakuten indicates a much softer, sometimes voiceless sound (P to W, F to H, T to Th). I should say now that I wrote out the phonetics of these in a way they make sense to me, so they might seem like nonsense to you. Because I don't understand international phonetic alphabet. But I digress. Vowels are never given diacritics.
Homonic uses both articles and particles, but particles are mostly used for action and subject indication. It's written subject-object-verb: Adjectives go after the noun they alter, but adverbs go before the verb. It's written left to right.
PaitarÅ
PaitarÅ is ipotanes' native language. It's an abugida, but unlike Montaran, consonants cannot exist alone. Instead, letters in their 'default' state are assigned the inherent vowel a, and all alterations from that indicate different vowel sounds. It's based mostly on Ge'ez and Eastern Cree.
ā¬ļø "This is an example sentence" written in PaitarÅ . Pronounced "Roujih myudae ba raisakÅ louhayka".
PaitarÅ has a bunch of different versions of verbs depending on context. They have general vs current forms, constant vs transient, beginning vs ending, and some verbs have a gladly vs reluctantly form. I gave examples, but this is my third time trying to edit this and I can't be assed to write it all out again without becoming the joker.
Rotation and diacritics determine the vowel sound of a letter. It's very consistent, so while it looks like there are 8 million letters, really there's just 12 that are altered slightly for different forms. A clockwise rotation 90 degrees will always result in the vowel ay, an macron will always result in the vowel i, etc.
It's written left to right, subject-verb-object, and uses no particles (but does use articles). It's also one of the harder languages to learn from an outside perspective, because many of the vowels (particularly o, oo, ou, and Å) sound similar to the untrained ear.
Arbor
Arbor is satyrs' native language. It's alphabetic, and has the largest alphabet of any language, with 42 letters (PaitarÅ beats it only if you consider all rotations and diacritics separate letters, which I don't). It's based mostly on Russian and Japanese.
ā¬ļø "This is an example sentence" written in Arbor. Pronounced "Shleya bouk dzyaƱen aotal voh."
It's written right to left, verb-subject-object. It doesn't use articles, but does use particles, which make up far more of the grammatical structure than of any other language. Particles indicate time, possession, location, direction, vocatives, pragmatics, formality, connectives, and conjunctions. For example, in the above sentence, the particle voh indicates certainty- what is being said is fact- not up for debate.
Formality particles are something that is mostly unique to Arbor: Homonic uses some, but they are loanwords from Arbor, and not used near as often. The only circumstance in which a satyr would not use formality particles is when speaking to children (or if the speaker is a child). Because of this, for an adult to speak without these particles is perceived as immature or patronizing or both. There are generally four 'levels' of respectful particles: familiar (for friends and family), peers (for acquaintances and strangers), respect (for superiors or elders), and higher status (for governmental or religious leaders). There are also degrading particles that are only used explicitly as insults, but are naturally not used in everyday life.
There are no true diacritics in Arbor, similar letters (like eh, ih, and uh, or v and fh) are considered distinct, not the same letter but altered).
Shotali
Shotali is nightlings' native language. It's syllabic, written calligraphically from top to bottom. It's made up of common humanoid phonemes as well as a clicking sound that is unique to their physiology. It's mostly based off of Khoisan and Vulcan.
ā¬ļø "This is an example sentence" written in Shotali. Pronounced "Sikosha taori niloth zhoi."
Here's the same sentence twice, one with the letters and other aspects of the sentence pointed out. The letters are designed to run into one another, where one letter ends another begins. Words are separated by a small open circle at the beginning and end to make clear the joint between the two.
It uses only two diacritics: a handakuten and a macron. In natural Shotali, they are used sparingly, but their usage has since expanded to allow for other sounds to be transcribed into Shotali. The macron traditionally changes just a few letters from an i vowel sound to an e (ri->re, ni->ne, li->le), but now can also be found to alter any letter with an i to an e, even if it was not originally allowed. The handakuten, in natural Shotali, indicates a click, made as part of the syllable alongside the voiced pronunciation, and is not actually considered a diacritic in this form. It's present only on hard consonants (k, v, d). These consonants can be written/spoken without the click and therefore without the handakuten, but only in very specific words or it is incorrect. Some words only define meaning by the presence or absence of this click- this makes things tricky for any other species trying to learn/speak Shotali.
Now, though, the handakuten is also placed as a diacritic on some other letters- not to indicate a click, but to harden the sound (Th to T, P to B, Zh to Z, J to hard G). These characters are not included in the base alphabet as they are considered adopted characters, meant to transcribe sounds from other languages- Shotali has a lot of technically allowed ways to write/speak that arent included in the 'official' alphabet.
Only d, j and th (or t with a handakuten) can exist as a consonantal sound without a vowel, considered a whole syllable by themselves in Shotali. It's written verb-object-subject, and uses no articles or particles. Adverbs and adjectives go before the noun or verb they alter.
Bonus: Chimerae's sign-morse
The chimerae, which live in the depths of the ocean and thus do not interact with any other humanoid species, converse with a form of sign language that utilizes their bioluminescent abilities. It is untranscribable, and so doesn't have a proper name. It's made up of similar signs as that of shallower merfolk: large, slow movements of the hands and caudal fin, but is additionally altered by light. Light carries meaning in: where on the body it is located, how quick the flash is, and what physical sign it accompanies.
Chimeraes have two distinct dialects of this language: a distant and close dialect, both used in conjunction with each other depending on context. Because detail gets much harder to see at distance, and the deep sea is big, the type of sign-morse used when far away from your conversation partner is different than that which is used when you are right next to each other. The former is vaguer, but more obvious, while the latter is more intricate and specific.
#ask#conlang#writing#<- trying to keep this so i can find it later teehee#THANKS BELOVED i sat with this for a bit but i shall now release her to the world. i am normal about fake languages and worldbuilding#also there is an ancient version of montaran that is not spoken but is used in tattoos and art. because it is aesthetic over function#also iarans (species of merfolk that can talk) have a language unique to them that is mostly used in song but it doesnt really...#..have a written alphabet or anything its very labile. likewise aesthetic (this time aural vs visual) over function#bcause they usually just sign to communicate with each other#AUGHC. i love making shit up. these were so fun to research for and put together#and they make the world feel a bit more fleshed out to know what their speaking sounds like?????#OH also the names for the diacritics are just what the closest analogue is called in the real world#they arent calling things macrons and tildes and dakutens. but thats basicslly what they are so thats what im calling them š#stupid as website broken ass website. post you asshole I'll kill you#.
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d&d tomberly... save me..
d&d tomberly
save me d&d tomberly
#power rangers#mmpr#tomberly#d&d#fantasy au#low pressure messy ass lil doodle to get the image out of my brain#tommy's a dragonborn redemption paladin who used to work for an evil sorceress (fantasy rita) as her first knight and vengeance paladin#kim's an assassin rogue who worked for the same sorceress under a (now broken) mind control spell#they travel together as adventurers to find new purpose in the world and right the wrongs of their pasts#and eventually fall in love along the way#truly just smashing together and playing dolls with different versions of them but now tommy's a big lizard and there's dungeons/dragons#tommy was also known as ser drakkon while serving under fantasy rita#and kim was just called slayer#so it takes a while for them to get used to using their normal names instead of their old titles once they start travelling together#ill do proper designs later i just wanted to fuck around a lil bit#(the height difference is also much more significant in ''canon'' imagine kim's on an apple box idk)
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Pet-ty Book Review no. 11 Together in a Broken World by Paul Michael Winters reviewed by: Sweetie
āI cared about these young humans right from the start, the writing pulled me in immediately (surprisingly, as human concerns seldom do). The whole time I was either enjoying their mating ritual (a "slow burn," something cats never do), or I was worried for their safety. I wanted to adopt them and snuggle them and wake them consistently at 4 am.ā >^..^<
#together in a broken world#Paul Michael Winters#books#new books#bookblr#bookblr community#bookstagram#books and reading#bookworm#book review#book recommendations#book recs#mm books#mm romance#mlm romance#mlm#lgbtq#lgbtq reads#lgbtq romance#lgbtq books#dystopian books#dystopian fiction#gay books#queer books#gay romance
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Iām remembering the Lovelace and Jacobi friendship thing they had going on the Urania and oufgh
#once again singing my praises for the wolf 359 wiki pages#and yāall better BELIEVE Iām using that shit in ouroboros. donāt even play w me#THEYRE MIRRORS OF EACH OTHER!! TWISTED BROKEN SHATTERED MIRRORS!!!#THEY LOST EVERYTHING!!! THE ONLY DUFFERENCE IS THAT LOVELACEāS PIECES WERE ABLE TO BE PUT BACK TOGETHER#AND JACOBIāS COULDNT BE#DO YOU HEAR ME.#DO YOU SEE MY VISION.#tweaking rn im just so#hrrenghhghadhddhh#tragic friendship honestly#lovelace sees herself in jacobi in the latter end of brave new world#someone put me down#wolf 359#w359#daniel jacobi#isabel lovelace#the ouroboros cycle#<-au tag because I need this for later probably#be fucking warned
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Itās so embarrassing and heartbreaking being in so much pain over losing someone while knowing they donāt give a fuck if you live or die. Your favorite person becoming a stranger is a special kind of hell.
#I fucking hate having bpd#while Iām at it I donāt understand the fuckin audacity some people have to say they love you and do horrible things to you#I feel so stupid#I feel so stupid for believing all the lies#but I was so in love and put him on such a pedestal that I just allowed it all.#thinking about someone constantly and grieving over them and knowing theyāre perfectly fine and to them you donāt exist#Iām still in such a state of grief and I donāt understand why time hasnāt healed#it honestly feels like itās gotten worse w time#I just torture myself but I canāt help it my brain wants me dead#itās so painful I feel so fucking stupid#being abandoned with no closure by someone whoās your entire world#for someone they were unfaithful to you with multiple times (I donāt even know how many and dony want to know) immediately#like that was the plan all along#he took our cat hundreds of miles away and I donāt even know if he still has her or if sheās still alive and I miss her every day#I never loved someone like that and it feels like the heartbreak is actually physically killing me#i spent 1/5 of my entire life with him#I was my prettiest and had the best body at the time and I wasted it on someone who didnāt appreciate me#not wasted. it wasnāt wasted. we had some incredible times together#Iāll never be that beautiful again#and now idk what do so bc i canāt decide which is worse: being alone and isolating or loving deeply and ending up horribly hurt all over#itās all just so upsetting.#and I feel so stupid for allowing it all#he knows more about me than anyone and he made me feel like he loved me so much sometimes and then did horrid things and itās so fucked up#nobody read this Iām so embarrassed and horribly broken#it traumatized me so much there was so much abuse and pain idk if Iāll ever recover#I deserved it but it still hurts my heart#I was so mentally ill and sick I know it had to have been miserable to be around me#there are so many things only he understands and knows about me and I need to talk about them I j wanna b able to b there 4 each other#but that girl is so beyond insecure and controlling so. if I want to talk to who fuckin gets me Iām just fucked#why lead someone on like that for years knowing youāre going to abandon them the second itās convenient
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It makes me wanna facepalm whenever I remember how hard Poppy was crushing on Creek cuz she's so in love with Branch now and that could've been Creek but he was a fucking idiot and blew it
#the fact that he sold poppy and all their friends to an enemy to save himself and in the second movie branch almost dies to protect poppy#to everyone who's trying to justify him remember that you have to be a special type of an idiot to believe that your enemy will spare you#also creek was trying to make poppy dislike branch and then he hurts her so bad he throws her into branch's arms#he's just so bad I'm happy that poppy found someone who truly loves her now#like you don't have to die for me but you don't have to get me killed either thank you very much#also how broken poppy was when he did it and everyone she loves were in danger#it hurt me so bad when she lost her colours#it's fascinating how the song is about true colours and creek just showed his true colours when he betrayed them#trolls movie#trolls creek#creek#trolls branch#trolls poppy#poppy#branch#broppy#trolls world tour#trolls band together#trolls holiday#trolls holiday in harmony
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I need a completely rewritten teen wolf series with Derek Hale as the main character. I think it would heal me.
#we follow Derek from New York. Laura left for beacon hills. itās been six years since he was back but he hasnāt heard from her#and hes going stir crazy waiting. he packs up and travels back. itās almost too much immediately. he still canāt get a hold of Laura#he canāt resist going home. itās like a natural pull that guides him back. all at once heās 16 again. staring at the wreckage of his life#deputy stilinski is sherrif now. itās reassuring in the slightest that the police force seems to have moved on from how corrupt it was#he catches her scent and itās putrid. bile catches in his throat. he seeks it out. still in denial to what he knows it means.#when he finds Laura itās like the world ends all over again. he canāt stand to see her like this. he gives her a proper burial.#the best he can do at least#he visits Peter. heās not the man Derek remembers- so full of fire and cunning. their relationship may have been strained at times.#often Derek felt more like Eve being swayed by the snake than a normal friendship#but this isnāt the sharp tongued uncle who guided him. this is a broken shell. all that remained of his family. he was so lost.#22 but he barely knew how to function without his family- his pack paving the way#Laura handled everything. she got the apartment. she made sure they had food. Derek looks back and feels so useless#he was so lost in his grief. Laura must of felt the same way but she never let them drown in it#she made sure he got his GED. even got him to enroll in community college classes.#he took them online. he never was able to warm up to people the same way. he used to be so full of life. now he just wanted to be left alone#he studied English. never finished his degree. doesnāt look like he ever will now. he canāt go back to Laura and his shared home.#canāt bare to see another shell of a home#he vents to the vacant audience of Peter and his cold fixed eyes#Derek leaves. he wants to promise heāll return soon#but promises feel costly these days#he decides to go back to the reserve. maybe he can find some clue as to what happened to Laura#someone lured her here. someone who knew them and their history here#his mind went to the worst. Kate. why would she go through the trouble six years later. why wait so long.#Derek couldnāt stomach the thought of facing her. he focused on the woods. the scents were all over the place.#clearly multiple people had been through here recently. two scents were much stronger. Derek follows them#but when he hears the crunch of leaves he realizes why the scents are so strong. theyāre still here#he ducks behind some trees. listening in on their conversation. but an echo of their scent catches his attention#he spots an inhaler on the ground. he puts two and two together and swipes it from the leaves.#he comes out once theyāre closer. tossing over the inhaler- he figures theyāll leave. dumb kids messing around in the woods#he reminds them this is private property. though that may not be true anymore. he recognizes the scent of a new beta. interesting.
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