#This isn't to make anyone feel bad
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preciouslittle-bhaalbabe · 7 months ago
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I think some people treat Astarion too much like a fragile porcelain doll sometimes.
Listen, I completely understand the instict to be super gentle and never push anyone to do something they don't want to. But that's just the thing. Astrion doesn't do it if he doesn't want to. If you don't push him into sleeping with you in act II, he doesn't. If you don't have enough approval at the party, he doesn't propose sex. He WANTS to. The reasoning behind why he wants to may be a bit fucked up in the beginning, but if he didn't at least like you a little he wouldn't bring it up. If he didn't want to try experiencing other forms of sex again with the drow twins, he wouldn't agree. In fact, if you ask him before his personal quest is over he tells you pretty plain that he doesn't want to. He's very clear about boundaries and consent is VERY important to him. If he doesn't want to, he won't. This is also demonstrated with his reaction to the astral touched tadpole. It's a VERY clear "no".
He wants to enjoy sex again. He wants his mind to match his body's desires. He is SUPER into the player. He wants to be able to have that kind of intimacy with them.
Does that mean he doesn't struggle still during the act? Of course not. Healing isn't linear. I remember shortly after a particularly bad experience my body would refuse arousal. I was with someone I love deeply and my mind was in the right place, but my body just refused to cooperate. I feel like Astarion goes through something similar, but reversed. His body takes over (muscle memory most likely, he's done this MANY times) and his mind receeds. Having an orgasm while dissociated is not a pleasant experience. But again, if he didn't want to try, he wouldn't. He can communicate his boundaries and when he feels uncomfortable. It's not the players job to protect the smol precious sex repulsed bean. He's figuring it out on his own terms and the best thing the player can do is listen.
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fridgrave2-0 · 5 months ago
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hehe ghost-turbo haunting felix au
turbo is connected to the last piece of his code in the whole arcade - a trophy he gifted to felix in mid 80s as a symbol of him genuinely caring about their relationships on par with being the best racer. felix also gave him one of his medals and both kept their gifts next to other rewards, but when roadblasters and turbotime were unplugged, the medal was gone with everything else
now, after burning in cola-lava turbo is basically dead, but scraps of his code still were intertwined with the trophy (after all, it was his first winner's cup, but felix never knew about it), giving turbo an opportunity to exist as a shadow incapable of interacting with anything and anyone besides felix, who kept the trophy even after the roadblasters incident
also I went crazy in tags, feel free to check them out
#turbo#turbotastic#fix it felix jr#80s boyfriends#hammertastic#headcanon about them exchanging their trophies isn't mine but i loved it A LOT#and “darling” is turbo making fun of how felix was calling him in 80s#this hc about “doll” and “darling” pet names also is not mine but i adore it#turbo here is a complete freak who just stays around felix most of the time even when felix has moments with calhoun#and felix is an ass who keeps secrets from everyone bc he doesn't want his dirt to come out#he's ashamed of his previous relationship with turbo and doesn't want anyone to know any details#and calhoun to just know about it#this just gets worse and worse#they also didn't actually break up and were still technically dating when turbo went gamejumping#and he's mad af at felix because he's the reason ppl in the acrade made a boogeyman out of turbo and he couldn't come back#like imagine your bf says to you what you are better than others think of you#and then behind your (presumably dead) back tells everyone that you're just an egocentric maniac#i believe turbo has other reasons why he gamejumped (besides jealousy which took place but wasn't the most important reason)#and felix is an unreliable narrator#so yeah turbo HATES his ass#(but still would-) no im not making it suggestive#anyway i hc that turbo had put A LOT of emotions in this relationship even tho he's bad at this#he tried his best with felix but they were just making each other worse#and turbo while feeling betrayed never really moved on (yes even after 25 years he's PATHETIC)#and felix is just full of regret about everything but he won't admit his mistakes in his relationship with turbo#bc “well he turned out to be a bad person so that automatically makes me in the right about everything”#but felix had made a lot of bad decisions while dating turbo and was just classically ignorant about a ton of things#sorry about this random ass essay in tags i'm done for now#wreck it ralph#wir
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invye · 5 months ago
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We are interrupting our regularly scheduled program to bring you a snippet of a potential ZoSan undercover as a married couple fic:
(Timeline wise shoehorned in sometime shortly after the timeskip, before the Strawhats make it back into the news big time.)
(People need saving from a exclusive circle of nobility, but most of the Stawhats have already been seen around the island, so the lot ends up on Zoro and Sanji to try get in posing as a freshly married couple on their honeymoon to try get more information.)
[after coming up with the plan and Zoro and Sanji hesitantly agreeing]
Robin: "You seem a little stressed, Cook-san."
Sanji, chain-smoking his third cigarette: "I'm fine, I'll do this… I just… I don't like lying about something as significant as marriage, alright? I know it's stupid, but that's just how I am."
Luffy, perking up from where one might have thought he wasn't paying attention at all: "Oi, Sanji, promise to protect Zoro?"
Sanji, puffing out smoke: "Obviously, the Marimo would get lost within all of two seconds without me having his back."
Luffy: "Good! Now, Zoro--!"
Zoro, already rising to the bait: "Oi, if anyone is protecting anyone, I'll be guarding your lanky ass, shit cook!"
Luffy, laughing: "Alright, then as the captain of this ship I hereby pronounce you married!"
Zoro:
Sanji:
Robin: "Oh my, congratulations!"
Brook: bursts into song
Luffy, grinning at Sanji: "See, now it's not a lie anymore, so you don't have to feel bad about calling Zoro your husband."
Zoro: "LUFFY!!! YOU CAN'T JUST--"
Sanji: wordlessly walks off to get ready for the mission
Usopp: "Wait, wait!" runs after Sanji, grabbing his wrist
Sanji: stares
Usopp, sweating nervously: "Need your ring size…"
Sanji: staring intensifies
Usopp, scurrying off as quickly as humanly possible: "Wedding gift!"
Luffy, in the distance, still being yelled at by Zoro: "Too bad we don't have time to celebrate, I really want some wedding cake… :("
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paper--moons · 3 months ago
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Thinking about that classic agere trope where the regressor borrows their cg's clothes (usually something along the lines of a hoodie or t-shirt) to wear, and while that's all fine and dandy like...please consider regressors that are much taller/heavier than their cg borrowing clothes and using them as a sort of lovey instead. Just hugging onto their jacket because it's so soft and smells like comfort.
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foundfamilywhump · 5 months ago
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see like the thing with 'carewhumpers' as a concept to me is it just like... i know this is prrrrobably not really how it's meant but something skeeves me out about the idea that kindness or caretaking mixed in with hurting someone can somehow meaningfully complicate or dilute the harm done to the point of making that character no longer a 'whumper' whereas someone doing the same 'bad' things but not ever being gentle or caring for them would just be a straight-out whumper. when like... that's how 90% of irl abuse dynamics work? so i just... don't really get the point, i guess. like to me it implies something about the 'care' provided somehow mitigating or combating the harm done that. i just do not personally appreciate or enjoy.
#gav gab#just thinking out loud#like i don't think that's 'nuance' or 'grey characters' i think that's just an extremely common and typical dynamic of abuse#someone breaking your nose and then cleaning up the blood and tucking you into bed is not less like#violent or abusive or harmful than someone who just stops at breaking your nose yk#and i think that it can successfully be summarized by any number of other ways?#carewhumper is just not useful or meaningful shorthand to me the way caretaker/whumper/whumpee are#it implies that the word 'caretaker' or 'whumper' encompasses 100% of a person's constant behaviour#in a very flattened and simplistic way#please do not come at me about this im not saying this is how everyone means it this is just#how i personally feel about it#due to the way i approach these words#and im not trying to say anyone CANT write about very typical abusive dynamics#im just saying the elements of like. 'good' behaviour or 'kind' treatment#doesn't make the Bad Part any less real or bad#the way that 'carewhumper' being set as a different or distinct thing than 'whumper' implies to me#i just feel insane whenever i see people using the term tbh like this is probably a me thing#a very stupid distinction to get hung up on#but i just. im always like isn't that just a whumper who's nice sometimes#what is the utility of this word if not to imply that#someone being nice sometimes meaningfully combats how cruel they are other times#what part of 'whumper' means they always have to be violent and awful 24/7#and do not take this to mean caretakers are never allowed to fuck up#or do anything wrong or get frustrated#or anything like that but that is like#very distinct from being a whumper of any kind at all#like the idea that a 'whumper' can only be 100% a sadist who means to cause harm and intends to cause harm every time is like#cmon now
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s1lv3rp4w3dc4t · 3 months ago
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shout out object shows with canon queer ships. I'm talking on screen kiss or even just verbal confirmation. all things considered it's a bit strange you don't really see them that much when you think about how gay everyone here is. I love you ii but c2bc did what you didn't and I think that's actually really nice.
#girl makes claims when there's 1 more ep for ii and many more for c2bc. police arrest her.#inanimate insanity#ii#osc#silver's mental breakdown#c2bc#c2bc spoilers#do we do that here or what#fireball c2bc#pound c2bc#i always misread his tag as pound cake. i am but a fool#also is firepound mildly fanbrush coded ir am i kind of losing it. it's someone and pb. because fireball is very pb coded. inspired? somethi#ng. also c2bc totally takes influences from ii and we all noticed that right. it's not a bad thing. ii is my favorite show. but like. “im nb#.“ ik there was like no other way to say it but that's exactly what pb says in s3. ”he wants to make a boys club!“ ”im nb.“ ”i mean... a no#girls club!!!!“ i think i lile c2bc but im bot 100% sure? i saw someone comment that all the chars are likeable but like. speaker isn't!! st#op bullying my girl corky!! she's literally not that bad! don't get me started on beerkeg. i dont feel bad that he was manipped bcus like. d#ude she said no. leave ger alone#!!#i dont feel bad for him at all snd even cheered when princess hat (?) started using him even though it was not the greatest move and not sup#er healthy. s2's cast is still mych better though. justice for portal though!!!!!!! gone too soon. i kinda shipped. princess hat (?) and tap#e measure in s1 btw i never told anyone that but I did think it. service bell is like a taco i like mych less. and shout out firepound and m#mirror book. pretty crazy how gay objects can just live in my head and i let them do that. anyways sorry for writing a whole nother post in#the tags i just haven't shared my thoughts yet and wanted to lol.#i like it i think#firepound#<- oh hey look gay people
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necrotic-nephilim · 4 months ago
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this is not a ship post, but something that frustrates me a lot in fanon concerning Jason Todd that attempts to soften Jason's return to Gotham for the sake of found family domesticity or easy hurt/comfort or just sliding him into the Batfam sooner, is they all seem to fundamentally misunderstand Jason.
because there seem to be a lot of fandom popular concepts of Jason coming home much sooner and just not having his whole Under The Red Hood arc. which in theory is fine and i can see the want to simplify canon to make room for your lighthearted more fluff-leaning concepts. but in everyone without fail, the way they address the clown-shaped elephant in the room is by having some throwaway line that "oh Jason quietly kills the Joker and moves on".
when the Joker being dead or alive is not the *point*. if by some chance accident, the Joker had died prior to Jason's return, whether by ridiculous freak accident, getting whacked by a fellow villain, hell even someone actually doing so to avenge Jason, it *would not* satiate Jason's anger. because Jason's end goal in UtRH is not to simply kill the Joker: it is to make *Bruce* kill the Joker. Jason's anger is directed to the idea that to Jason, if Bruce truly loved Jason, he would've killed the Joker. that is love, for Jason. compromising your personal values for love and not letting someone go unavenged. when Jason was Robin, almost every angry or misguided thing he did was born of love. he wanted to kill/hurt Two-Face because he believed Dent killed his father. he was so angry at Felipe because an innocent woman was dead due to that man's actions. he wanted to save his mother in a situation he knew he shouldn't be in because he loved her. his anger, his violence, it is driven by love and feelings of righting wrongs. that is how he thinks wrongs *should* be righted. that is how you avenge and *love* someone.
because so long as Jason's return to Gotham doesn't end in Bruce killing the Joker (which, it never will bc Bruce is Bruce), Jason will never forgive Bruce. you cannot wave away the layers of hurt and complicated trauma by killing Joker offscreen. because Jason will still be angry that Bruce didn't avenge him. in his eyes, that means Bruce did not love him enough. he was not truly loved by Bruce the way he loved Bruce. bc Bruce was Jason's whole *world*. prior to being taken in, Dick and Tim, they had support systems. they had loved ones. they knew what stability and healthy family love looked like. Jason *didn't*. and that's not to say that Catherine Todd did not love him with her whole heart and thus he loved her, but it certainly wasn't a stable and safe support system for Jason to grow up in. Bruce was Jason's first real sense of a stable, healthy life. and so of course Jason poured everything into Bruce and loved Bruce so devoutly. Bruce was his world. like he says, if it had been Bruce, Jason would've stopped at nothing.
so his betrayal is rooted in that he was not avenged, not that Joker is alive. so long as the Joker does not die by Bruce's hands, it will never be enough for Jason. (in this era, at least.) notably, this is also why i don't think it would change a thing if Jason knew the whole "oh Bruce wanted to kill the Joker but Superman stopped him" tidbit that fanon has really latched onto as a way to pacify Jason's anger toward Bruce. Jason knowing that wouldn't change a thing, in my opinion. because Jason knows Bruce. and a tenant of Bruce's character is that he grapples with murder *every day*. the whole point is how *easy* it would be for him. he is a human weapon, trained by killers, trained to be deadly. he is the greatest strategist to exist. he knows he could kill someone and get away with it. *no* trace, no proof, nothing. and he knows he *wants* to. wants to kill the Joker, Joe Chill, anyone who's hurt him that viscerally.
but he *doesn't*. that's the point. Bruce wakes up every day with that question on his mind, and every day the answer is the same. Bruce's morality is not a decision he made in an alleyway when his parents died, it's a decision he continues to make every day and he *must* continue to make in order to remain who he is. Jason is quite familiar with the fact that Bruce grapples with this daily. i do not think it surprised nor fazed Jason to know that Bruce did *consider* killing the Joker. that he wanted to. maybe even planned to. but a consideration, a want, a plan, is just a thought. it's nothing substantial, and substance is everything to Jason. at the end of the day, Bruce didn't. he was talked down by *Clark* of all people with an excuse of diplomatic immunity, as if Jason and Bruce don't both know that Bruce could've *easily* found a way to make it look like an accident or some other loophole. because he's Batman. there's always a loophole. he always finds a way when he actually intends to. but he never actually intended to kill the Joker. so he didn't. and Jason would know that there was never an intent. it's an interesting piece of fodder to add to the nuance of Jason and Bruce, but honestly, i think it'd make Jason angrier to have that excuse thrown in his face. as if Bruce hasn't beaten Clark half a dozen times by now. it's a flimsy nonsense excuse that Jason would rip to shreds.
so while yes, i understand the wish for easy lighthearted fanfic that doesn't have to deal with the nuances of canon, i think that Jason's character will always be so deeply robbed and altered if you try to fix his thirst for vengeance with an off-page killing of Joker at Jason's hands. it was never the point. the point was that -in his own eyes- he wasn't loved enough for Bruce to make an acception. he realized that not even his *death* would come before Bruce's Mission. Jason truly believed that Bruce loved him and held him as the most important thing in the world, and now he has proof that Bruce didn't. because the Mission mattered more.
i'm not saying i have a solution to this conundrum if you're attempting to solve it for fanfic/fanon, nor am i even saying it's a bad thing it exists. i just think it becoming overwhelmingly common has led to misunderstandings surrounding Jason's motivations and feelings about this arc and it's an unsatisfying solution that only seeks to pacify Jason's rage and his trauma responses for the sake of found family-ification.
#necrotic festerings#jason todd#fandom meta#idk man this isn't too serious it's really just me noticing this becoming a dominate thing#also this post isn't a subtweet at literally anyone specifically#it's a commentary on a trend as a whole#so no one think i'm like. being shady pls.#and if you write jason killing the joker himself during this era that is okay and it's valid#i just don't want the fandom largely treating it as in character#but ooc fanfic is allowed to exist! that's valid yk!#also i once again wanna reiterate all of this is commentary on *this era*#this is a pre-flashpoint meta.#jason's realtionship to his trauma *wildly* changed in both new-52 and rebirth so yeah. he's at a point he's “moved on”#and either seeks to kill joker himself or seeks to just let go of the whole thing#depending on the arc#(but if i get into that then i get into my feelings on how jason has had no consistent characterization in the past decade. so.)#(that's a can of worms we're not opening here it will make some ppl mad and i'm not dealing with it.)#is this how i start writing serious character metas and not unhinged shippy ones. idk#i've got others in my head but#i fear the discourse#if the discourse on this post gets bad i will turn off replies and reblogs idc#this is me testing the waters. ig.#also if a single person tries to argue about tim not having a loving family i will bite you /lh#yes he did. the drakes make not have done the *best* job! i'm not arguing that.#but they loved him and he had a support system.
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skrunksthatwunk · 7 months ago
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actually i'm still thinking about the moral orel finale.
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he has a cross on his wall. do you know how much i think about that bc it's a lot.
a lot of stories ((auto)biographical or fictional) centering escape from abusive/fundamentalist christianity result in the lead characters leaving behind christianity entirely. and that makes complete sense! people often grow disillusioned with the associated systems and beliefs, and when it was something used to hurt them or something so inseparable from their abuse that they can't engage with it without hurting, it makes total sense that they would disengage entirely. and sometimes they just figure out that they don't really believe in god/a christian god/etc. a healthy deconstruction process can sometimes look like becoming an atheist or converting to another religion. it's all case by case. (note: i'm sure this happens with other religions as well, i'm just most familiar with christian versions of this phenomenon).
but in orel's case, his faith was one of the few things that actually brought him comfort and joy. he loved god, y'know? genuinely. and he felt loved by god and supported by him when he had no one else. and the abuses he faced were in how the people in his life twisted religion to control others, to run away from themselves, to shield them from others, etc. and often, orel's conflicts with how they acted out christianity come as a direct result of his purer understanding of god/jesus/whatever ("aren't we supposed to be like this/do that?" met with an adult's excuse for their own behavior or the fastest way they could think of to get orel to leave them alone (i.e. orel saying i thought we weren't supposed to lie? and clay saying uhhh it doesn't count if you're lying to yourself)). the little guy played catch with god instead of his dad, like.. his faith was real, and his love was real. and i think it's a good choice to have orel maintain something that was so important to him and such a grounding, comforting force in the midst of. All That Stuff Moralton Was Up To/Put Him Through. being all about jesus was not the problem, in orel's case.
and i know i'm mostly assuming that orel ended up in a healthier, less rigid version of christianity, but i feel like that's something that was hinted at a lot through the series, that that's the direction he'd go. when he meditates during the prayer bee and accepts stephanie's different way to communicate, incorporating elements of buddhism into his faith; when he has his I AM A CHURCH breakdown (removing himself from the institution and realizing he can be like,, the center of his own faith? taking a more individualistic approach? but Truly Going Through It at the same time), his acceptance (...sometimes) of those who are different from him and condemned by the adults of moralton (stephanie (lesbian icon stephanie my beloved), christina (who's like. just a slightly different form of fundie protestant from him), dr chosenberg (the jewish doctor from otherton in holy visage)). his track record on this isn't perfect, but it gets better as orel starts maturing and picking up on what an absolute shitfest moralton is. it's all ways of questioning the things he's been taught, and it makes sense that it would lead to a bigger questioning as he puts those pieces together more. anyway i think part of his growth is weeding out all the lost commandments of his upbringing and focusing on what faith means to him, and what he thinks it should mean. how he wants to see the world and how he wants to treat people and what he thinks is okay and right, and looking to religion for guidance in that, not as like. a way to justify hurting those he's afraid or resentful of, as his role models did.
he's coming to his own conclusions rather than obediently, unquestioningly taking in what others say. but he's still listening to pick out the parts that make sense to him. (edit/note: and it's his compassion and his faith that are the primary motivations for this questioning and revisal process, both of individual cases and, eventually, the final boss that is christianity.) it makes perfect sense as the conclusion to his character arc and it fits the overall approach of the show far better. it's good is what i'm saying.
and i think it's important to show that kind of ending, because that's a pretty common and equally valid result of deconstruction. and i think it cements the show's treatment of christianity as something that's often (and maybe even easily) exploited, but not something inherently bad. something that can be very positive, even. guys he even has a dog he's not afraid of loving anymore. he's not afraid of loving anyone more than jesus and i don't think it's because he loves this dog less than bartholomew (though he was probably far more desperate for healthy affection and companionship when he was younger). i think it's because he figures god would want him to love that dog. he's choosing to believe that god would want him to love and to be happy and to be kind. he's not afraid of loving in the wrong way do you know how cool that is he's taking back control he's taking back something he loves from his abusers im so normal
#i had a really big fundie snark phase a year or two ago so that's part of like. this. but im still not used to actually talking about#religious stuff so if it reads kinda awkwardly uhh forgive me orz idk#maybe it sounds dumb but i like that the message isn't 'religion is evil'. it easily could have been. but i think the show's points about#how fundie wasp culture in particular treats christianity and itself and others would be less poignant if they were like. and jesus sucks#btw >:] like. this feels more nuanced to me. i guess there's probably a way to maintain that nuance with an ultimately anti-christian#piece of media but i think it'd be like. wayy harder and it's difficult for me to imagine that bc i think a lot of it would bleed out into#the tone. + why focus on only These christians when They're All also bad? so you'd get jokes about them in general#and i think that's kinda less funny than orel and doughy screaming and running from catholics lsdkjfldksj#i think the specificity makes it more unique and compelling as comedy and as commentary. but that's just me#like moralton represents a very particular kind of christian community (namely a middle class fundie wasp nest)#you're not gonna be able to get in the weeds as much if you're laughing at/criticizing all christians. but they accomplish it so thoroughly#and WELL in morel and i think that's because it chose a smaller target it can get to dissect more intimately. anyway#moral orel#orel puppington#(OH also when i say wasp here i mean WASP the acronym. as in white anglo-saxon protestsant. in case the term's new to anyone <3)#maybe it's also relevant to say that i'm kindaaaaaaaa loosely vaguely nonspecifically christian. so there's my bias revealed#i was never raised like orel but i like to think i get some of what's going on in there y'know. in that big autistic head of his#but it's not like i can't handle anti-christian/anti-religious media/takes. i'm a big boy and also i v much get why it's out there yknow#christianity in specific has a lot of blood on its hands from its own members and from outsiders and people have a right to hate it for tha#but religion in all its forms can be positive and i appreciate the nuance. like i've said around 20 times. yeah :) <3#(<- fighting for my life to explain things even though my one job is to be the explainer)
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lord-squiggletits · 3 months ago
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Is anyone talking about Megatronus' cog and how maybe Megatron taking that was also a sign of him being not a good leader.
Is anyone complaining about how Orion got the Matrix going to also complain about how Megatron stole Megatronus' cog out of Sentinel's chest even though 1. he supposedly doesn't believe in Primes and false prophets any more and 2. Sentinel stole that cog from Megatronus' body who he murdered, so Megatron is literally just perpetuating that cycle of treating a dead hero's body parts as a collectible one is owed for having the Vision And Initiative To Seize Power. And being a hypocrite because despite supposedly hating Primes, he still covets Megatronus/his iconography so much he stole his cog and used it for his own despite the fact Alpha Trion (the last living Prime) gifted Megatron a perfectly usable one that he got consensually unlike Megatronus'?
Bc like. If we're talking symbolism into account. Idk it felt pretty symbolic to me that one of Sentinel's evil acts was to steal someone else's t-cog and then what does Megatron do? Steal someone's t-cog. Sure, Sentinel stole it first and was a bad guy so he ostensibly doesn't deserve having his corpse treated with dignity, but like... was it not obvious to anyone else that that act was where Megatron definitively went over the line of "revenge on an evil leader" to "stealing dead a dead guy's organs to suck out his physical power and symbolic presence for himself."
Are we going to talk about that or are we just going to keep bitching about how Orion was given the Matrix while he was dead, not expecting to be given a chance at life again, not seeking power for his own gain, with the consent/blessing of the previous Primes which somehow makes him evil and unfair
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artuurle · 25 days ago
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the issue with most of my creative process being very "in the moment" is i end up with a bunch of doodles for things i then decide isnt "canon" to things or i get REALLY DERAILED, so last night i drew some love and loss au doodles that kinda occur later on. Huzzle sweep.
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The last one above is traveling to another god domain really hurriedly looks like in my head to be 100% clear. mini rift <3. no time for flair we needs to GO NOWS.
if you cannot tell I love drawing huzzle a lot. my cunty lamp <3
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companion-showdown · 7 months ago
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Who had the worst time aboard the TARDIS?
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TOURNAMENT MASTERPOST
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angelsdean · 3 days ago
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[deep sigh]
#i don't want to *shudders* 'discourse' but my god. some ppl do not understand the you are not a child/i never was scene w/ dean and mary#might just have to dig up my previous posts on the topic#like! the whole point is that both dean and mary's feelings are valid. both are allowed to feel hurt. both are grieving.#dean being 'a decade older' than mary doesn't change the fact that he's never had his mother in his life and finally does and WANTS her#to BE there#that's it. that's all he's asking for. he's literally NOT asking her to 'parent' him or coddle him or cut the crusts off his sandwiches#he's not expecting her to play 'mommy'. he literally just wants her around and wants her to CHOOSE them over their enemies#i don't think that's a hard ask or unreasonable#but at the same time i also think mary is allowed to want space to process her own complicated grief over losing her 'babies'#and she's allowed to want to discover who she is outside of being a mother esp now that she doesn't have small children to care for#but that also doesn't mean she ever stops 'being' a mom either. she's always going to be their mom. whether she feels equipped to be or not#(most parents do not feel prepared or equipped to be parents)#and so i also understand why it hurts so bad for dean (and sam) to watch her leave them. to watch her seem to choose anyone BUT them#even if that's not what she's actually doing / not her intention#like the point of that scene is that they're both hurting and both's feelings are valid#dean isn't being unreasonable asking for his mom to finally be in their lives and stick around and wanting to know her#but mary is also allowed to want space (she is so like dean in that respect) to process everything and figure out who she is#anyways. i said i wasn't going to make a post abt it but i guess i kind of did#even tho i know i've said all this before in another post a while back#dean and mary#vic.txt
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birb-tangleblog · 8 months ago
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Them 💛☀️💙🌙🌿🌸🦉🦎
I'm so delighted I was finally able to get my hands on this pin- she's so pretty in-person!
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mewguca · 12 days ago
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sometimes i feel compelled to delete this account
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quiet-admirer · 2 months ago
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Friendly reminder: just because someone participates in a kink space doesn't mean they want kink directed at them personally. Just because you've talked with someone before, whether about kink or not, doesn't mean they want kink directed at them personally or that they want to get kinky with you. Even with someone who you've had kinky interactions with in the past, it's always a good idea to ask first if they're in the mood for a kinky chat or want to receive belly pics or hear about your boner.
Because maybe they do! And then you're interacting with someone who's on the same wavelength as you and you're more likely to get the actual interaction you're looking for! And if they're not into it then you can skip over the awkward conversation or being left on read and you can keep it moving and keep reaching out to find people who actually are into it and interested :)
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kindnessoverperfection · 4 months ago
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Lately, when I talk about someone I strongly disagree with, I think about my friends.
When I interact with someone who regularly rants about people, and tends to take things in the worst ways (without any attempts at self-reflection or grace), I feel more on-edge. I'm nervous to voice opinions. I'm always over-thinking everything I send them, worried about how they'll receive it.
On the other hand, I feel much safer during conversations where someone is speaking neutrally about those they feel at conflict with. When they feel upset about a situation, but without talking aggressively about the other person. Because I know that if we're ever in a disagreement, or have some sort of conflict or misunderstanding, they won't hurt me or suddenly hate me*.
I used to speak much more aggressively about people. My personality disorders, combined with online toxic environments, were big factors in that. I was stressed and angry constantly, and I felt justified, and I felt afraid and ashamed to respond with anything but anger. But to make a long story short, I had several big painful interpersonal experiences where I realized how my attitude was impacting my friends.
I remember the nervousness in my friends' eyes. I remember the people I've met who are much older and never grew out of that reactive communication style, and I don't want to be that person. I want my loved ones to feel safe around me.
So nowadays, I do my best to speak compassionately (or at least neutrally). Because I want to signal to my friends that I'm not going to be cruel to them, or to automatically believe the worst of them, during a conflict or misunderstanding. I try to vent about situations and my fears instead of people.
I wish I'd realized this before.
*(I discuss splitting in the tags)
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