#The hyperfocus
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ADHD at night: I could write a book. I could get my Master’s Degree. I could go to the club and come home with 12 new friends. I could get a job at that club and meet the mother of my children. I could cure every disease and use my wealth to bring world peace.
ADHD during the day: Fold laundry too hard :( Come back next week
#adhd#actually adhd#executive dysfunction#disability#neurodiversity#neurodivergence#neurodivergent#neurodiverse#hyperfocus#hyperfixation
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Obligatory battle of the labyrinth kiss scene
Bonus:
#holy shit it’s done#I’ve been working on this for 34 and half hours according to procreate#nine days#I physically could not stop myself from working on it until it was done#I locked in so hard#I’m shaking#the adhd hyperfocus consumed me#I’m having a visceral reaction to creating this#I HAD to draw it#my art#fan art#artists on tumblr#percy jackson#pjo#percabeth#Percy Jackson and the olympians#Annabeth chase#percabeth fanart#battle of the labyrinth#botl#riordanverse#rrverse
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Fuck hard in the— wait, how did that line go again?
#poolverine#deadpool and wolverine#wade wilson#logan howlett#honda odyssey fucks hard#my art#this is my most intricate painting ever holy shit#hyperfocus really pulled through for once#I guess the secret was just more bloodstains all along
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Wait- I thought this was normal???
#neurodivergent#neurodiversity#autism#actually autistic#autistic things#hyperfixation#actually neurodivergent#asd#meme#visualization#hypervisualization#hyperfocus
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#Funny how at work they proclaim they worry about mental health to trey to avoid medial leave due to mental illnesses but at the next second#They're demanding to have tons of work up to date when they fucking now it's impossible#They don't want burnout people but they do nothing to avoid it#All the while the administrator herself spent more than half of here work hours having coffee with another chief 🙄🙄🙄#The desire to take that medical leave is breathing in my neck#But I won't#I'll just complaint about it until I forget and then they do another thing to piss me off#Like if they actually knew about mental illness and stuff they'd fucking knew its not just stress and depression what make people illi#It's also anxiety eh doesn't let you focus properly because you can't stop worry about something#It's a the fucking adhd that doesn't let you focus EVEN IF YOU WANT TO#That makes you doing 38873728 shit instead of the work you have to do but you just can avoid it sometimes#So they expect everyone has the same level of focus but nope#People get distracted people sometimes lose focus but then when they regain it the huoeecois let's you do your work at the speed of light#The hyperfocus#We're people were all different#You can't expect everyone produce the same amount of work in a determined period of time#Ugh#Bye
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My cat has always had the worst timing. He'll jump up on my desk to cuddle at the very moment I'm about to get up to urgently go to the bathroom. He'll try to curl up with me in bed the very instant I need to get up and refill my glass of water and put some vaseline on my dry, sore lips. He'll ask me to play just at the second I need to end my break and get back to work.
The poor guy, right? From his perspective, he approaches me for love and I immediately get up and leave. I feel awful about it. I try to reassure him first that I love him and he just has bad timing, but I know it can't feel nice, and also he's too big of a dumbass to understand that me getting up and walking away isn't triggered by him coming to say hi.
Except today I realized something: Yes. It is.
I was sitting at my desk watching a video and up jumps the boy with a mrrp, head positioned for pets, when I realized I urgently had to get up and go to the bathroom. As I opened my mouth to say "bad timing again, buddy," it finally occurred to me that... I definitely already had to go. I for sure did not "suddenly" have an urgent need for the toilet out of fucking nowhere.
I didn't realize I needed to go because my brain is piloted by angry gremlins and they were more interested in watching the video than letting me know about an important bodily function.
My cat coming to say hi is a regular trigger that pulls me back into my body from whatever bullshit I'm hyperfocusing on. And that's when I realize all the warning lights are flashing on the dash. Need water. Need food. Need toilet. In pain: need to change position. Holy shit look at the time, need to get back to work!
I now wonder how much worse I'd function if I didn't have a furry little guy in my apartment to regularly remind me that I exist in a physical form which requires maintenance and also that time passes.
I do still feel bad for walking away from him every time, but I have started just inviting him to come with me. Hey bud, sorry, I have to stand up right now, but come follow me while I get a glass of water. You coming? Come on! And rewarding him with pats for following. It's better than just walking away, I think.
Anyway cats (or other pet of your choice that requires frequent attention)? 10/10, strongly encourage having a little guy to bother you now and then, especially if you have ADHD and live alone.
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Toddifons! (and bonus version w/o tanktop)
Working in the shop on a hot summer day is, well, hot
Hey, since you're here, check this out!
#Did you know: I drew this on ONE Layer so there's no line art for it lol#Word on the street is that she only has one really strange skin in game but there's log entries saying she wears overalls to work#I love the description of her working on her project. Very hyperfocus-core lol#Overall supremacy#digital art#pixel art#artists on tumblr#arknights#art#Toddifons#pixel
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no outlet
@blitzbee-week day 3: attack
prev | next
#i worked on this for 15 hours straight from start to finish. ough.#eye strain#blitzbeeweek2024#blitzbee#maccadam#transformers#vart#tw eye strain#i keep looking at the overall shape and detail of each panel and going. damn i made that#i fr blacked out into hyperfocus at one point
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Exandria B, Bren and Essek
from the fic series reflections and other illusions of control by @atlasarcana extra tidbits and process gif under break :D
total time: 50ish hours (i didnt measure exactly lol)
as soon as i finished reading this series, i knew i had to draw something. i mightve gotten possessed in the process, this is the most detailed sg painting ive made in a WHILE a lot of aspects in esseks design was inspired by this piece by zmees with some of my own elements added in bren's design was mostly my own ( i have a double breasted vest i made like his thats blue :3)
#critical role#my art#shadowgast#caleb widogast#essek thelyss#bren aldric ermendrud#shadowhand essek#volstrucker bren#the hyperfocus was insane with this one
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What's your stance on Ford as a person? Honestly, I believe that for thr majority of canon he is a bad person. But I believe he grew. Still not great though XD
(Love him anyways obvs)
I disagree entirely! I think he's equally as good a person as any of the other main cast.*
*Except Mabel, who, as we all know, is always right about everything.**
(**This is a lighthearted joke. For the love of god, I don't want Mabel discourse in my inbox.)
His biggest sins in the show:
After telling his brother that he was thinking about changing their shared life plans, and then discovering that his brother had gone to the high school that night for no good reason and gone to the science fair for no good reason and messed around near Ford's science project for no good reason and broke it and didn't tell Ford about it... Ford believed Stan did it intentionally and held a grudge for it. You know what, it WOULD be pretty damn hard to believe it was an accident.
Hilariously ill-equipped to cope with Fiddleford's mental health. A guy who responds to "I have anxiety" with "have you tried yoga, it helps me" isn't a bad person, he's clueless. "Character cheerfully enacts a bad idea while a loved one in the background goes NO PLEASE DON'T DO THAT" describes half the episodes of Gravity Falls.
Was successfully manipulated by a professional manipulator into believing his best friend wished him ill. Man, what a terrible person Ford is for being manipulated by a manipulator and saying cruel things to somebody he'd been genuinely convinced was trying to harm him.
??? Didn't say thanks to a guy he was still mad at after the guy fixed a problem he himself had caused. This is a solitary example of stubborn bad etiquette, jesus christ. There's half a dozen different reasons why it makes perfect sense Ford wasn't in the right mindset to feel grateful, this is not something worth indicting his entire character over.
He had high ambitions, which everyone seems to lambast him for, but high ambitions that wouldn't have required doing anybody harm! (Until the professional manipulator started manipulating him into harming the people around him, but we are going to demonstrate some reading comprehension and not blame Ford's underlying morality as a person for things he never would've done if not for Bill's bullying, con artistry, and outright lies.) Like, what is it that he wanted to do with his life? Use his talents to get rich and famous? Shit, that's exactly what Stan wanted to do with his life. It's what Dipper fantasizes about doing with his life. Even Mabel, who thinks about her long-term future the least, dreams big with her art & performances and is already making big money off cheap-ass commissions. What terrible people they all are, for—let me check my notes here—uhhh... unrealistically fantasizing about achieving success in life by doing the things they're good at.
When their dad accuses Stan of lying as a child, Ford puts his entire summer on the line to defend Stan even though he knows Stan is a habitual liar and has no reason to believe Stan is telling the truth this time.
When his new college roommate he barely even knows gets laughed at for proposing an outlandish scientific theory, his first emotion is outrage at this injustice and he drops everything to convince his already-despondent roommate that he was right and help him prove it beyond a shadow of a doubt.
When he moves to a new town, he tries again and again to befriend his new neighbors, and fails not because he's rude or a jerk, but because he's awkward as hell, tells terrible jokes, and sucks at identifying phoenixes.
When Fiddleford gets hurt around him, he cares about it, feels guilty about putting him in that position, doesn't want it to happen again, and tries his best to help even though he's bad at helping.
When he gets kidnapped by a weird holiday folklore creature, he concludes without even thinking about it that he's now in charge of protecting and rescuing the kidnapped kids. Yeah, then he immediately starts hollering at the folklore creature for trying to impose his religious beliefs on Ford and the kids—but like, Ford was right tho, he just had bad timing.
When he discovers that the Northwest family committed atrocities against their poorer neighbors a century ago, his first instinct is to march up to their house, find the first Northwest he can locate, and give them a piece of his mind for it. Like, this won't even FIX anything. He's just THAT OUTRAGED over the injustice.
When he sees what he thinks is a fortune telling fraud conning the people, he attempts to debunk her because he's mad to see someone cheating other people with lies—and when he can't debunk her, he just leaves her alone rather than harass her about it. Typically, if assholes think somebody's doing something wrong but don't have any proof of it and fail to get proof when they look, they decide they're right anyway and keep giving that person shit. Ford doesn't give her shit. That's the opposite of an asshole move.
When he discovers his Portal To Knowledge (And Fame & Fortune) is actually a Portal To Doom (But Still Possibly Fame & Fortune, Maybe Even Godly Power), he isn't tempted for a second to keep working on it anyway. There is no moment where Bill manages to tempt him. No matter what Bill offers, no matter how long Bill offers, never, at ANY point, does Ford have a SECOND of "but what if I did make a deal with the devil?" the way so many heroes in similar situations often do.
You ever notice that? So often moral moments in the show are presented as choices the characters make. Will or won't Dipper give Bill a "puppet" in exchange for knowledge. Will or won't Stan fight a pterodactyl to protect Mabel's pig. Will or won't Mabel hand Bipper the journal. Ford is never given a "will or won't he" moment over Bill's threats, offers of friendship, or offers of infinite power—he steamrolls straight past them without a second of consideration—because, to him, the selfish, cowardly, easy choice ISN'T EVEN AN OPTION. He doesn't even SEE it as making a choice because the possibility of doing the wrong thing is invisible. A character who wavers first before turning Bill down would look more noble for "overcoming" temptation—it's harder to notice just how much stronger Ford's moral compass must be to not even feel temptation in the first place.
Greed and pride never tempt him to join Bill's side. Exhaustion, despair, and fear never tempt him to give up. He bears up under weeks, possibly months of extreme sleep deprivation, physical torture, psychological torture, emotional torture, threats of death, threats of brainwashing, threats to his family. He doesn't hold up so that he can pat himself on the back for being a hero—if that was all it was he would've gone "screw it, this isn't worth it and nobody would know I'm the one who gave up" a week in—he does it because he simply knows it must be done and because he's so isolated (half because of Bill's influence!) that he believes he's the one who must do it, all alone.
Thinking he has to do it by himself isn't egotism or pride; it's helplessness. He thinks no one else stands a chance. He thinks he's alone.
And, when he discovers his Portal To Knowledge is a Portal To Doom, he immediately feels guilty. No trying to deny the situation to protect his ego. No shuffling the blame off to someone else. No "maybe the apocalypse could have a silver lining!" No locking the door and trying to ignore the problem. He blames himself for being fooled—he IMMEDIATELY takes full responsibility for his actions—and he CONTINUES to take responsibility FOR THE NEXT THIRTY YEARS.
He takes more responsibility than is even warranted—he treats himself like he's an idiot for believing in an APPARENT GOD who's been practicing manipulating humans for thousands of years and who had never given Ford reason to believe the portal was anything but what Bill said it was. He beats himself up to no end every single time his past with Bill comes up. He even keeps beating himself up thirty years later when he's shoving warning notes to future readers in Bill's evil unkillable book!
When he falls into the multiverse, he dedicates his entire life NOT to finding a way to rescue himself, but to finding a way to permanently stop the CHAOS GOD who's still at the threshold of destroying Ford's world and countless others. He makes himself a hated criminal in the process, just to stop Bill. He's ready to spend the rest of his life trying to protect a world he doesn't think he'll ever see again. He does it because, as he sees it, somebody has to stand in between the children and the obnoxious folklore cryptid menacing them, and he's the only adult in this damn cave with the skills and knowledge for the job.
When he gets home, he doesn't tell his family about Bill and his quest because he's afraid that doing so will get them involved and endanger them too—and because he's too deeply ashamed of himself and his mistakes to stand the thought of his family knowing about the horrible things he's done (AGAIN, WHILE BEING MANIPULATED BY THE GOD OF MANIPULATION).
He loves his great-niece and great-nephew the second he lays eyes on them; he nevertheless tries to steer away from them to keep them safe from Bill; and yet he caves to the very first temptation to emotionally bond with his great-nephew he gets, because in spite of his noble "keep them safe" intentions, he wants so so badly to be close to his family.
As pissed as he still is at Stan and even though neither of them can look at each other without hissing like cats, he still makes an attempt to start bridging their divide by inviting him to play DD&MD.
When the apocalypse happens, he immediately puts his life on the line to try to kill Bill.
And when he's captured, isn't fazed for a second by Bill's offers or threats... until his family is threatened. The exact thing he'd been trying to avoid & prevent from the very start.
And when he's reunited with Fiddleford, his immediate reaction is to point out that Fiddleford's well within his rights to hate him—which isn't a new revelation, it's not like Ford had to do any soul-searching to reach this conclusion, he'd concluded that 30 years ago the instant he realized Bill had played him and that he'd been lied to about Fiddleford.
And then he tries to kill Bill again.
And then he's ready to sacrifice his own life to kill Bill—and the only reason he doesn't is because he has a metal plate preventing him from making the sacrifice... but, Stan doesn't have a plate. If Ford hadn't had the metal plate, he would have gladly done the exact same thing Stan did—and he would have thought it was right for him and only him to make that sacrifice, because it's VERY clear he feels (and has felt from the start) that this is all his fault and he's obligated to fix it.
Over and over and over, these are Ford's two defining character traits: getting so pissed off at injustice that his common sense shuts off and he goes into terminator mode until he's righted this wrong as best he can, even when he can't actually do anything about it; and feeling like he's Atlas, weighed down with the full responsibility of fixing everything he's done wrong and made to believe that, for everyone else's sake, he has to do it all alone. Even when doing so puts himself in harm's way, even when he has to put his entire life on hold for it, even if it might cost him his life. Scrape off his awkward social skills, his loneliness, his nerdiness, his endless curiosity, his zealous love of the strange, his starry ambitions, his yearning for recognition and success—scrape his personality down to the bone and that's what you're left with. A man who believes in defending the exploited so strongly that it makes him a little stupid.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and assume that you probably don't think Stan's fundamentally a bad person, and that you probably think that isn't even worth questioning. Stan's made a whole career out of swindling people, conning them out of as much money as he possibly can, stealing, lying, committing a long list of goofily-named crimes, and attempting douchy pick-up artistry on women; and to cap it all off, he held the safety of the entire universe hostage to demand a goddamn "thank you." Don't send me any "But he had reasons—" "But it was only to—" I don't need it, I don't want the essay, I'm not arguing that Stan's a bad guy, it's fine.
But. You can look at Stan's moments of cruelty and unkindness, his uncharitable thoughts, his character flaws, and think, "that doesn't define him. He's more than his cruelest moments and worst mistakes. He's imperfect, but he cares so much and his heart's in the right place, and beneath all the flaws his core is good."
And if you can't do the same for Ford, it's not because he's a worse person. It's because we got two seasons with Stan and five and a half episodes with Ford—and while we saw Stan yearning to fish with the kids or encouraging Mabel to whoop Pacifica's butt at minigolf or crying over a black and white period drama or punching zombies to save his family, we only saw Ford at the worst moments in his life and under the stress of a prolonged apocalyptic crisis—and, it so happens, all the moments he was pissed at the guy we spent two seasons learning to love.
Ford's got moments of cruelty and unkindness, uncharitable thoughts, and character flaws. But, at his core, he's a good person, and he always has been, and he still is.
#anonymous#ask#gravity falls#grunkle ford#ford pines#(note to self: when you see an ask that makes you go 'god i don't wanna get into this; i'll type something quick & punchy and move on'—)#(—do NOT start typing something 'quick & punchy' when your adhd meds are wearing off.)#(they WILL last just long enough for you to snap into a hyperfocus but not long enough for you to have the power to stop typing.)#(i'm thirsty.)#meta
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Leo not being aware he is a genius will never not be funny to me it's not even because he is insecure with it but he genuinely thinks the stuff he does is do EASY and everyone could understand. He gets genuinely frustrated when people looks at him confused. (This is also really autistic of him
#heroes of olympus#leo valdez#feeling frustrated when no one else understands your hyperfocus or something else
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I have a disproportionately loud mess of a head for no discernible reason* so it’s kind of a miracle that I spent the last month and some change willing myself to wield watercolor again. Witness the struggle! A long overdue color sketch for a (super patient) client.
Just watercolor with a boop of gouache.
*they are a mush of small but immense problems??? Executive dysfunction being maximized by meds the main culprit…
#watercolors#work in progress#equine#commissioned work#color study#traditional media#traditional art#you wouldn’t believe how much I want to hyperfocus on this piece for a week state#but the burnout and year long hiatus have shaken my confidence to its core#and I was never a confident person to begin with#it’s a horrible feeling and I have had to borrow J’s will to conquer it in any way#I celebrate even the smallest victory these days otherwise I’d burst#can you believe my adhd diagnosis was inconclusive?#no I’m fan but I am getting tired of relying on my brain to punch itself#i need new meds holy shit#there are not enough apologies to make up for how I feel about making everyone wait
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you idiot, we could have been…us.
#one intense bout of hyperfocus later and here we are#i have so much to do what am I doing here#again not super entirely happy w this but my brain won’t let me stop until this is done and for the sake of my wellbeing#here ya go#i can’t draw clothing so pretend the monotone colour blocking is purely ✨artistic✨#im so dehydrated omg I love having adhd it’s great (LYING THRU MY TEETH)#good omens#ineffable husbands#crowley#good omens 2#aziraphale#aziracrow#go2#ineffable lovers#ineffable wives#good omens season 2#gomens#gomens 2#Michael sheen#David tennant#gomens season 2#good omens fanart#crowley fanart#art#fanart#good omens 2 fanart#david tennant fanart#anthony j crowley#my art#ineffable divorce
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mr grump and his golden ray of sunshine
i just wanted to draw their contrasting outfit choices (all the clothes vs none of the clothes lol) but edward’s a possessive lil bitchh so here we are
lineart and another close up ⬇️
#jakeward#being a mind reader has its pro and cons#please appreciate jacobs lil tooth it made me very happy to draw#i drew this in a 5hr hyperfocus which prohibited my use of references#so if anything looks wonky#thats why#thats also why it took so long (friggin brain)#jaydraws#jacob black#edward cullen#jacob x edward#twilight fanart#twilight#the twilight saga
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Predicting Film Plots and 4 Other Examples of Autistic Pattern Seeking
Neurodivergent_lou
#autism#actually autistic#autism and pattern seeking#examples of pattern seeking#predicting film plots#hyperfocus on patterns#neurodivergence#neurodiversity#actually neurodivergent#feel free to share/reblog#neurodivergent_lou (Facebook)
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