#The Painful Statements Tour

[slrmagazine]

NONPOINT Announce The Painful Statements Tour with Special Guests Crobot and Heartsick

NONPOINT Announce The Painful Statements Tour with Special Guests Crobot and Heartsick. #nonpoint @nonpoint

NONPOINT announced The Painful Statements Tour with special guests Crobot and Heartsick. The tour is in celebration of the 20th and 25th Anniversaries of the band’s two most popular albums, TO THE PAIN and STATEMENT. The band will play songs that not only haven’t been heard in a long time, but also songs that have never been played live. Leg 1 of the tour will kick off on January 10, 2025 at The…

[thekidsarentalright]

this year rly should be the year i get believers never die tattooed on me like ive been wanting since i got into fob huh. bc like. this whole era this whole tour is so. believers never die. the timing has never felt so right

[catboybiologist]

The year is 2030.

At the Cincinnati stop of her "world tour", Taylor Swift ends her set. As she walks off the stage, she leans into a nearby mic and says "oh by the way, I'm lesbian".

She's still milking a public relationship with a man named Chett Whitesman, so this is met with a combination of cheers and confusion. Immediately, the media mobilizes. They have to intercept her before she gets onto her private jet, and ambush her for an interview. Luckily, this has become much easier these days. Since the release of her 2027 album, "The Carbon Emissions of my Heart", T Swizzle has performed a ritual sacrifice of an endangered species on live camera every time she boards her jet, a #girlboss way of saying that her emotional pain can only be healed by the tortured screams of drowning polar bears.

(Since this practice started, a devoted faction of Swifties have started a carbon negative algae farming commune, with the express intent of negating taytay sweezie's contributions to climate change. Apparently "her tortured soul deserves to pollute without guilt". They haven't even come close to their goals.)

Taytor Twift is intercepted after this ritual, as she's walking up the steps of her plane. When asked what the lesbian statement was about, she nonchalantly says "oh, I thought it was clear that was a joke. Anyways, G T G!" , before biting into the still beating heart of an emperor penguin.

During her flight, discourse on the newly renamed twitter-X-ElonIsExtremelyVirile Corp goes nuclear like it never has been before.

There's a camp of swifties thoroughly convinced that her relationship with Chett is all a beard so that she can still keep touring in the New Christian Republic of Florida, and the interview at the plane was deepfaked.

A different camp of Swifties feels insulted and betrayed that she would be anything less than a paragon of allyship. To them, this is the worst slight the queer community has ever experienced.

A third camp of Swifties insists that she *is* dating Chett, and is also a lesbian. They get insulted that anyone would police Taylor's labels. Comparisons to the Boulder, Colorado shooter are made.

A group of non Swifties tries to point out that everyone is fucking insane and that 'ole taytay regularly tear gases pride rallies to make way for her promenade to stadium venues, and who the fuck cares about this shit and point out that what a billionaire celebrity does for five minutes of PR is not worth your attention or discourse, nor does it warrant harassing other people for the labels *they* use, and isn't it really fucked up that Taylor is making a joke of how people describe their identities? They are promptly doxxed, harassed, and banned.

Bi lesbian discourse is off the charts. Nothing Taylor said has anything to do with it, but it happens anyways.

A lone transsexual who actually goes outside once in a while tweets "hey guys isn't it kinda fucked up that 2.4 billion people have been displaced by mega storms this year that her jet contributes to and is also specifically designed to fly over" and is promptly doxxed and harassed off the platform.

After an exhausting 9 minute plane ride, Tailing Swiffer lands in Columbus for the next performance of her world tour. She unveils a new single that contains the line "ride my horse after dumping him, stepping up onto my SAD dle".

All is forgotten. All is quiet. The Swifties continue as usual, moving on to the next discourse about these lyrics.

[mashtatosworld]

drama

summary: the timeline of the 'back to you' series

*not an accurate representation of real-time - im a human that's bad at maths

Step into the world of y/n and Gdragon - featuring the highs and lows of an idol couple.

The Start:

The couple first captured headlines in 2015, when y/n starred as the lead in BIGBANG’s dreamy Let’s Not Fall in Love music video. At the time, y/n was still carving her own path, a fresh face in the industry with more potential than recognition.

That all changed just a week after the video’s release, when the pair surprised fans by announcing their first collaborative track. The song was an instant sensation, earning them multiple awards and solidifying their status as both artistic partners and the industry’s newest power couple.

Later that year, the 2015 Melon Music Awards became the stage for their highly-anticipated first public appearance together - a moment that sparked endless headlines and fan theories about their off-stage romance.

Though they toured separately, the two couldn’t seem to stay apart for long. Fans were regularly treated to surprise appearances at each other’s concerts, moments that only added to the couple’s mystique. Behind the scenes, insiders revealed that GDragon and y/n were secretly engaged for three years - a private promise that was repeatedly delayed by their demanding schedules.

By 2018, the strain of their global fame and conflicting commitments appeared to take its toll, leading to the heartbreaking end of their whirlwind romance.

The Separation:

As 2018 drew to a close, GDragon offered fans an unfiltered glimpse into his world with the release of a raw and intimate tour documentary. Gone was the invincible K-pop icon - in his place stood a man unraveling, visibly fragile in the wake of both creative exhaustion and personal heartbreak. It was clear to the world: GDragon was at his lowest.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the spotlight, y/n's career was blazing brighter than ever. Her post-breakup album became a global phenomenon, striking a chord with millions of heartbroken souls who found solace in her words. With every award she accepted and every chart she topped, it was evident - the pain of her past was fuelling her rise.

Despite their individual successes, it was obvious that both stars were mourning the same love story, albeit in very different ways.

The Song:

As y/n’s career flourished, GDragon disappeared from the public eye to complete his mandatory military service - a quiet two-year stretch punctuated by rumours and speculation. During this time, y/n faced growing pressure from both media and fans to address her relationship status. After months of silence, she finally confirmed: there would be no reunion with her ex. She was seeing someone new.

Just two months after her public statement, GDragon released Still Life, a hauntingly reflective track that left fans dissecting every lyric, searching for traces of their once-iconic love story. And then - silence.

For both stars, the world went quiet.

The Speculation:

For years, their story seemed to have ended - until 2024 reignited the flame.

It remains unclear whether the former couple reconnected before that year’s MAMA Awards, but rumours exploded after the two were spotted making a swift and discreet exit from the afterparty - hand-in-hand.

Fans’ suspicions only grew weeks later, when GDragon introduced his newest family member to the world - a cat named Zoa. In the photo, a glimpse of a mystery woman sparked immediate speculation. Longtime fans were quick to draw comparisons to y/n, especially since the pair had famously adopted their first cat, Iye, together back in 2016.

The internet was buzzing - was this a new chapter, or the revival of a love story once thought to be over?

The Secret:

Then the world went into shock.

After years of piecing together their love story through cryptic lyrics, subtle stage moments, and whispered rumours, fans were finally gifted the ultimate confirmation - and it was a moment no one could have predicted.

Seven months after their unexpected reunion at the MAMA Awards, y/n returned to the stage alongside GDragon. Stepping into the spotlight, y/n's growing baby bump was impossible to miss, as was the sparkling diamond ring adorning her finger.

The revelation sent shockwaves through the industry, though perhaps the biggest clues had already been there for those willing to see them.

Just months earlier, GDragon had made a rare appearance on bandmate Daesung’s YouTube series, ZIPDAESUNG, where he teased his long-awaited comeback tour and album. During the chat, the rapper hinted at “major life changes” - and eagle-eyed fans couldn’t help but notice the simple wedding band now sitting comfortably on his finger. After years of playful hints and carefully guarded secrets... the world finally had its answers.

The couple then gave fans a performance for the ages - returning to the very song that first sparked their romance in 2015. This time, they weren’t just co-stars or collaborators. They stood side-by-side as husband and wife, performing their love story in front of the fans who had followed every twist and turn.

In August, the pair welcomed their daughter into the world - a new muse for their ongoing love story. Though they’ve shared glimpses of their life as parents on social media, they’ve chosen to keep their daughter’s face private, protecting her from the spotlight they know all too well.

Now, as they step into this new chapter together, one thing is clear: after years of heartbreak, healing, and finding their way back to each other, GDragon and y/n's love story is far from over.

We're glad to see that the two are happier than ever.

𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪

starting to like making these social media posts but bOY do they take time

taglist: @petersasteria, @mirahyun , @allthoughtsmindfull , @gdinthehouseee , @infinetlyforgotten , @redhoodedtoad , @kathaelipwse , @lxvemaze , @loveesiren , @sherrayyyyy , @getyoassoutthetrunk , @shieraseastarrs , @ctrldivinev , @xxxicddbr88 , @onyxmango , @tryingtolivelifeblog , @tulentiy , @bettelaboure

[killerlookz]

She Makes Dirty Words Sound Pretty | Joost Klein

description: joost klein x f! reader You and Joost manage to find a moment of intimacy over the phone amidst a time of hardship in your relationship. (very much based on of this song <33 so lyrics are scattered throughout!)

content 18+ NSFW, MDNI- phone sex, mutual masturbation, relationship issues, angst/comfort, lots of comfort (if you catch my drift), this fic contains rpf and has been tagged as such, do not continue if that makes you uncomfortable, and please block the rpf tag

word count: 2425

I'm only trying to work this out / So if you call me at all don't tell me that I'm ordinary / because I won't be passing you, please don't leave

Your stomach churns at the sound of your phone buzzing, over the last week you had associated the sound of your phone buzzing with nothing but tears and heartache.

You roll over, letting the thick comforter that covers you slip down your shoulders as you reach for your phone from the nightstand. Just as you expected. An anxious hand hesitates to pick up the phone, not in the mood to engage in conversation with who you were sure within the coming days would be your ex-boyfriend.

A sharp pang vibrates throughout your chest looking at the screen that shines at you.

Joost <3

Rather hurtfully paired with a picture of the two of you together, his arms wrapped around you, lips pressed against your cheek in a soft kiss.

You roll your eyes, he was going to keep calling if you didn't pick up. You huff, giving in, ripping your phone from where it sat next to your bed. Reluctantly you answer, your chest tightening waiting to hear the voice on the other end.

"Y/n?" The trepidation in Joost's voice was apparent, "Are you there, schatje?" The inclusion of the pet name made you wince, sounding all too sweet for your displeasure with him at the moment. Usually, you'd revel in his compliments and sweet nothings- but not now, you couldn't.

Things had been unusually hard lately, only exacerbated by the fact that Joost had been away on tour. It seemed like all the two of you had done in the last few weeks was fight. Usually about petty, little things- things that didn't even really matter but in the moment they seemed like everything. Half the time you couldn't even remember what the arguments were about, all that remained were bitter feelings and tear stains that lingered on your cheeks.

It had all culminated last night- a screaming match unparalleled to any other petty argument the two of you shared in recent weeks. You knew deep down that neither of you had meant any of the horrible, venom-dripped words you had spit at each other. But right now it felt impossible to ever forgive, much less forget.

"I'm here." You respond, short, monotone- trying not to give too much away about how you were feeling.

"Oh, y/n," He breathes, "I've been worried, I've been trying to talk to you since last night."

"I saw." You answer, just as short and uninterested as your last statement. Joost had been blowing up your phone for the last 24 hours- so terribly you had considered blocking his number at least for a little while.

"I know you're mad at me, y/n, but I still worry about you, you can't just ignore me like that." His voice is firm like he's scolding you- but you can sense a pain behind your voice, and if you hadn't been so fed up at the moment, you'd almost feel sorry for ignoring him.

"Oh," You snap, "So you're going to tell me what I can and cannot do now?"

"Why are you looking for a fight, y/n?" He sighs, "I'm just saying I was worried about you, how was I supposed to know what happened?"

"I'm not looking for a fight."

"You're always looking for a fight," Frustration is heavy in Joost's words.

"Is that really what you think of me?" You scoff, covering the ache you feel in your heart with anger.

You hear Joost let out a breath on the other end, "No," You note how tired he sounds as he continues, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean that. You know I didn't mean that."

"I don't know that. It sounds like you did." You're having none of his apology, weeks of growing resentment were not going to be fixed by one simple apology.

"Mijn lieve meisje" (My sweet girl) He coos, "I don't mean to make you so angry." His voice has softened, a stark contrast to the harsh tone of your own voice, "You know I hate to hear you sound like this- even worse to know I did it."

Something about the gentleness of his voice, and the way he seems so aware of his own role in all of this makes your heart thump- and you almost want to forgive him altogether. But you can't, not right now- not yet.

I hear you breathing on the line... / I leave you hurting every night

"Het spijt me (I am sorry), I want to make things better between us."

"I don't know," You mumble, unsure of if there is even anything that could make things better.

"You don't know how badly I wish I was with you," His voice rich with longing, "I need to make these last few weeks up to you. I miss you liefje, I miss us."

You can't lie, you want that too, wishing so badly just for everything to go back to normal, to no longer have this hole in your chest, for your body to no longer ache with this profound sadness.

"It's just going to be so hard to forget last ni-"

"I know, schatje." He cuts you off, "You have every reason in the world to be angry with me."

"Are you angry with me?" You ask, wondering if he mirrored your own upset feelings towards

"Angry isn't the right word, no." And suddenly your stomach churns with guilt, "I'm just tired of how things have been."

You're tired too, tired of dreading his calls, tired of the tears, tired of the sleepless nights regretting every awful word you've said.

"Me too," You murmur

"I won't force you to forgive me," Joost sighs, "Not until you're ready. But I know you're upset, and I want you to feel better."

His words are so soft, so gentle, melting away your anger with each. careful syllable.

"Can you talk to me, please?" He's practically pleading.

"What do you want to talk about?" You're unsure of what conversation could fill this dead air, how you could possibly talk and things feel okay.

"Tell me what you're doing now," He requests, his words quick.

"I'm just in bed," You shrug nothing special.

"Breaks my heart to think about you all alone in that big bed." You can't tell if the pity in his voice is mocking or genuine.

"I guess it's okay," You had gotten used to the loneliness, it was worse in the first few days he had been gone.

"Mh-mh," he mumbles in disagreement, "Hate thinking about how my pretty girl has to sleep alone every night."

There's a sensuality in his tone that makes you clench your jaw, and your breathing deepen. His pretty girl. His.

"In my bed, at that." He adds.

You supposed he was technically right- you had been the one to move into his apartment.

You hum softly into the phone, not able to come up with many words to say, he seemed more like was simply just thinking out loud than having a conversation.

"I miss you," He says again, "Tell me you miss me too, schatje, I know you do."

There's something about the way he speaks that makes you oblige so easily,

"Miss you too," You mumble, head falling to the side as your eyes close.

"Mmm good," He's practically purring to you, "You're so good."

The praise was simple, you hadn't done much past admitting something the two both knew was true, but it felt like it had been so long since the two of you had spoken so gently to one another, and so you absolutely drank it up.

"You're saying so little, what is on your mind?" He pries like he's looking for something specific.

"Nothing, really." You're entirely self-aware of how boring you must sound to him, but it's the truth- sort of.

He hums in response, "Can I tell you what I'm thinking about?" He asks, his voice oozing with anticipation

"I won't stop you,"

"I'm thinking about you, thinking about how beautiful you must look right now, about holding you, how your body feels against mine, about-" He stops short,

"About..?" You trail off, wanting him to continue his pretty praises. A delightful tingle was beginning to spread through your body, his kind words making you weak.

"More of the same," He says quickly, "Just thinking about being with you now."

A soft smile sweeps over your face at the thought, though you assumed your thoughts now had to be a lot less innocent than his. You couldn't help yourself, you'd been so pent up since he left that the smallest words of adoration were setting you off.

Your hands trail down under the covers, rubbing at your inner thigh, before softly grazing over your panties. You let out a sigh, rubbing soft circles over your clit through the thin lacey fabric.

Your breathing quickens as you deepen your movements, rubbing with more intention now. You arch your back, thinking about how this would be going down if Joost was here, the two of you had never needed to have makeup sex before- but you supposed now was as good of a time as ever to imagine it.

You think about how Joost said he needed to make it up to you, about how the last few weeks had been- at this moment you couldn't have thought of a better way for him to make things up to you than with his tongue, or his fingers, or his cock.

Your pussy ached at the thought of him- the thought of you stretching around him as he mumbles sweet words in your ears about how sorry he is.

You slip your panties to the side, a finger sliding down your now-soaked folds, the contact making you gasp, "Fuck,"

You can hear Joost clicking his tongue on the other end of the line- and suddenly you realize what you had just done, your body growing with an uncomfortable and shameful heat.

"So dirty," He chastizes

"W-what?" You sputter, attempting to feign innocence about what you had been doing.

Who wouldn't let you scream 'oh' into a soft pillow / I'm such an animal, and baby honestly these teeth won't let you go

"It's okay, schatje, you don't have to act stupid," His smirk is audible through the phone, "Don't be embarrassed, keep going, let me talk you through it."

Your body relaxes and your embarrassment subsides.

"Now, will you tell me what you're thinking about?" He asks sweetly

"Thinking," A soft sigh falls from your lips, "About you," Your hand slowly crossing your thighs to return to your throbbing cunt, "About how bad I want you." The words are a struggle to get out as you resume drawing circles around your swollen clit.

"Yeah?" He encourages, and you hear some shifting on the phone, "What do you want?"

"I want," You breathe out, "You," Another breath, "Inside of me."

"Fuck," He groans, his breathing becoming louder, "Want this cock, pretty?"

"Y-yes- ah!" You can't suppress your high-pitched yelp as you slip a finger into your leaking entrance.

"Say it, tell me how much you want me to fuck you." He begs, his voice low and gritty.

"So bad, Joost, need to be fucked so bad" Your words are breathless as you pump your fingers in and out, making your eyes screw shut tight. "Fuck, I haven't had you inside of me in so long, I need it." You feel your lower stomach tightening, pleasure taking hold of you.

"How about my tongue, hm? I'd love to taste you right now, always so sweet for me," Joost sounds just about as breathless as you do right now, and the thought of him on the other end only makes you want to work your fingers harder.

"Uh-huh," You whine, thinking about his tongue lapping at your arousal, his tongue trailing from your swollen clit to your quiver entrance, teasing, before taking a dip inside. "Anything- just need you."

"Oh, you have me, you'll always have me." His words are hungry, and you can tell he's speaking through a clenched jaw, "Fuck, liefje, you have me so worked up like this and you're not even here, love hearing that pretty voice of yours."

You're almost positive you're certainly in an even more worked-up state than he is.

"Mmmneed you to fuck me until I can't walk," You sigh, unable to help but think about him absolutely ruining you, his hands groping your flesh as he pounds into you, unrelenting. "My fingers can't reach as good as you do," You can't help but stroke his ego a little, he deserved it after the hell you had been putting him through.

"Oh," He whines, "arme schatje, (poor baby) I know, I know, just keep working those fingers for me though, okay?"

Despite your fingers not being able to hit all the same places Joost can, the pressure in your body is still building, and you can tell you're losing control, especially as a long string of groaned expletives falls from Joost's mouth, his obvious pleasure only working further to push you to the edge.

"I'm c-close," You stutter, your legs starting to shake.

"Speak up, baby- want to hear how you cum for me."

The pace at which your fingers pulse in and out of you increases, working to bring yourself over the edge. You imagine Joost inside you, imagine him bringing you to an orgasm and cumming all over the length of his cock.

You can't talk now, your words are simply replaced by loud moans and gasps as you hope to god you don't wake up the neighbors.

In the throughs of your orgasm now, your back arched- near screaming, "I-I'm cumming, fuck, Joost," You can't finish the rest of your sentence, all you can focus on is the wave of pleasure that overtakes you, the way the tightness in your body is shattering.

"Hold on," Joost grunts, "I'm almost there- hold on,"

You lay on your back, legs shaking, out of breath, listening to Joost on the other end.

He finishes with one final strained "Fuck"

Neither of you speak for a few minutes,- your mind is racing, your thoughts absolutely dizzying as the silence is only filled by the two of you attempting to catch your breaths.

"Still angry now?" Joost asks, finally breaking the tension.

"I don't think so," You're not, you were way too blissed out to feel anything but complete, overwhelming love.

"So you love me again?" He jokes, chuckling to himself.

"I never stopped."

a/n: i added a pt. II to this, find it here

[confusionmeisss]

can you watch my boyfriend, please? - n. sturniolo

🫧 nick sturniolo x male!reader

🫧 the “can you babysit my boyfriend” tiktok couples trend done with our lovely nicolas!!

🫧 just fluff.

🫧 560 words.

🫧 hello lovelies!! thank you kindly for wanting to read!! i did a chris version of this initially and it made me want to do one for the others as well, so here we are!! enjoy reading & much love!! <3 (ps. happy pride my loves!! 🩷)

matt version masterlist

“Hey y’all, can you watch my boyfriend for me, please? I’ll be back quick, promise,” you say, setting the phone up against a stray glass.

“What the fuck?” Nick says, looking confusedly at the camera then up at you.

“Be good,” you say, placing a kiss on his cheek and walking away.

“Be good?” Nick looks offended by your departing statement. “The fuck? I’m always good. You guys know I’m always good, right?” He asks the camera.

Nick rolls his eyes. “Anyway. I was just editing this weeks Wednesday video which I think is one of our best because it’s funny as fuck.”

“Y’know, you gotta be your own biggest fan, it’s the only way you’ll get anywhere creatively. It’s the same as being your own biggest critic,” he says with a nod of his head. Then he looks directly into the camera seriously. “But you have to know how to balance them out. Like, you have to know when something you made is shit, and know if you have to start over or rework it.”

“Anyway, I’m really bummed out that I don’t have tickets to Melanie Martinez’s The Trilogy Tour,” he says with a slight pout, tapping at the touchpad of his laptop. “I would’ve loved to hear Detention live. And the videos I’ve seen of her concerts before, her outfits always eat! And her stage presence, my God, it’s otherworldly!”

Nick suddenly rolls his eyes as he remembers something. “Ugh, so I went to ask Matt to take me to the store yesterday because we were out of Dr. Pepper, mind you, it’s one in the afternoon, and I walk into his room and he’s absolutely dead asleep.”

“Oh, we went to Target today, and I fucking tripped in a crowded ass aisle like the clumsy fukcer I am,” Nick lets out a huff. “Like it’s embarrassing as fuck when there’s like three different age ranges laughing at you.”

Nick goes to say something else but is cut-off by his bedroom door creaking open. He watches as you walk in and over where he’s sitting at his desk.

He feels you stand behind him, putting your chin in his hair. “Hey I’m back, thanks again for watching him yall. I hope he was good for you!”

Nick rolls his eyes up towards you. “Of course I was good,” he says with an irritated huff. “I’m always good.”

You let out a laugh, placing a kiss into his hair while reaching over him to end your phone’s recording.

—

comments

count on nick to always come at us with some wise words of encouragement ❤️

“yes nick, you’re always good” we all say in unison

nicks offense at being told to be good is sending me into oblivion 😭

is nick alluding that there’s a real og-ness to this week’s wednesday video?????

oh the pain of embarrassing yourself in public 😣

i am matt matt is me bc i too annoy everyone around me by sleeping in till 1pm :)

i feel your pain on not having tickets to melanie’s tour. god bless for tour videos on my fyp 🙏

oh dr pepper lovers rise!!

the affection & the kisses 💓💓

okay but i wanna know what nick was gonna say before the door opening interrupted him…

who else is happy that nick is in a happy loving healthy relationship???? 💛💛💛

[kipkoh]

I know it’s fairly popularized that Hunter liked being the Golden Guard but there was a line in Hunting Palisman that he says to Luz that has always captivated me: “At least you can figure out your own (future).”

This (not very subtle) statement of wishing to make his own decisions coupled with the fact that Hunter was studying wild magic even while he was still in the Coven is heavily indicative of the fact that he was dissatisfied with his role in life. I’m sure he was proud of being Golden Guard and really did want to help Belos in whatever way possible, but a big part of him did wish things could have been different for him. Those desires he announced in Thanks to Them were probably not spur of the moment ideas he wished he could have experienced before what he thought was going to be his death, but rather long term wants he’d been imagining himself taking part in even before he defected.

I’m bringing this idea up mostly because I keep thinking about Hunter’s life in the castle and the rare moments when he got to witness what normal kids lives were like. If the school tours of the castle were a common occurrence, I imagine he'd be curious enough to watch them when he could. At first he'd secretly trail them and observe how the kids interacted with each other, how they joked around with their friends, and overall how carefree they appeared. He'd watch the way they'd awe at the castle in a feeling of excitement he'd never gotten to share having grown up within those walls - the castle being all he’d ever known. Sometimes he'd imagine himself in one of their places - just a normal kid whose biggest worry was getting his homework finished before it was due instead of how he might be tossed aside and replaced by the one he called his family the second he was no longer of any use to him. At some point, maybe he would start avoiding the tours whenever they happened, not wanting to feel that painful yearning for a life that was never even within his grasp and instead choosing to try and forget about it completely in order to convince himself he was content being the person Belos wanted him to be.

Sometimes on his weekend missions he would encounter parents with their children just going about their everyday lives, smiling and happy and completely juxtaposed to his own experience with familial adults. He'd watch the ease of how a child's hand would slip into their parent's as if it was such a natural and common action, without even a hint of fear of negative consequence for the touch. Hunter would look down at his own hands mummified in leather and wonder why he'd never felt the gentle press of someone's loving palm against his own.

He'd watch two young children play fight with loose branches. He'd envy how their battle was pretend and the fact that neither of them were in any real danger. He'd silently scrutinize their battle form before offering to teach them proper tactics, only to be harshly turned away and reminded of the fact that normal kids didn't care, nor have a need, to know how to fight. He'd scoff at their lackluster ambitions and comment about how they would never join a decent Coven with attitudes like that, blatantly ignoring the fact that not everyone was forced to worry about proving their worth to everyone around them.

I don’t think Hunter going to Hexside to find new recruits in Any Sport In a Storm was just a random choice on his part. While there is some evidence that kids can choose to join the Covens early, it doesn’t seem like it’s something they’re forced to do before they at least finish school. Maybe they can be forced, which is what is implied when Hunter kidnapped the Emerald Entrails, but wouldn’t it be easier to seek out new recruits who would actually be willing to join of their own accord? Otherwise there would be no guarantee they would care enough to do their job well.

Hunter did try to recruit them naturally at first but when no one seemed interested, instead of moving on to a different group of people, he just chose to kidnap a group of kids and force them. He has this intense longing for a normal life but no way to reasonably go out and get it for himself, so instead he tries to bring that life to him instead. Maybe if there were other people his age around, it could be possible for him to experience even a taste of the camaraderie he’s seen the students on tours have towards one another. Of course a bunch of kidnapped kids might not want anything to do with him, but Hunter is probably desperate enough to where he didn’t really think it through that much. Either way, even if he can’t have that life for himself, maybe he’d feel less alone if he knew there were other kids experiencing the same struggles he was. Maybe he wouldn’t feel out of place if he wasn’t the only kid being forced to train for regular battles and missions. Maybe he wouldn’t feel as bad about not having the kind of parent-child relationships he sees in the streets if there were other kids around who never got to see their parents anyway. He wouldn’t be the only kid lost in a sea of adults at the castle who refused to respect him partly due to his age.

Of course we know it wouldn’t end up being the catharsis he’s seeking, but he’s willing to try. He’s spent over a decade in a life he wasn’t sure he wanted, constantly yearning for something more with other people always (though unwittingly) waving around their happy, normal lives in front of his face. He’s sad, he’s alone, he probably feels super guilty about it because he still wants to be what Belos wants and can’t… He’s probably spent his whole life in a constant internal struggle trying to either ignore his own desires or attempt to find a balance between his personal wants and his job that never truly existed.

[madamewhistledown]

I’m going to say what you’re not supposed to say:

I believe it would be easier on everyone, on Luke and Nicola, on their families and friends, on the fandoms and their PR teams, if they are clear on what’s going on with them and their romantic connections. Just a short quick statement, and explain they won’t be discussing this further, and we move on.

And frankly, I know, this has nothing to do with my life, and it’s none of my business. (I know that!)

Here the thing about me: I’m a person with an open heart. A hopeful heart. A heart that wants to stop hurting over the pains of the world and the pains of people we know. I want goodness to rule the day. And if I have to grieve something, I want to be able to grieve it as I should so I can go about life again.

For some stupid reason that I can’t fully explain, I cheer Nic and Luke with an open and hopeful heart. I want them to be together. And I’ve been trying to understand what it is about them that I’m so drawn to. It’s their light, their energy together. I want that energy for our world.

I also want to find a way to walk away. Everyone has to be so tired of all the negative energy and misdirections. I’m so exhausted of the back and forth of this fandom and all of the breadcrumbs and cookie crumbles we’ve been given, wondering if they are true. The Luke-coded things that Nic posts. The Nic-coded things that Luke posts in his stories. We are so sure that they are together and…

A photo comes out. A comment is posted.

And the whole fandom flips out again.

You have the Occam’s Razor folks- the ones who believe based on only what they see explicitly, and nothing directly from Nic or Luke. Most of these are photos from paparazzi or just assuming that when friends get together, they must be dating.

Then there are the Big Picture folks, like me. Sure I don’t know what’s going on. The thing is - I look at the whole narrative, Nic, Luke, and what the people they trust have released. We use our critical thinking skills and know that many simple comments or photos don’t fit in with the big picture narrative. Many of us see how the pieces fit together. Nic likes puzzles. This is a puzzle.

So now we are at a moment when many of us believe they are together and some other private events are happening. And we are elated. We are waiting for the day that everything is confirmed—

But then one comment by someone who we believe has Luke’s interest at heart has mentioned someone else.

This doesn’t fit with the Big Picture. It just doesn’t. And maybe this is the confirmation we need. It makes us horrifically sad. We grieve. And I know this has nothing to do with our lives. But we grieve anyway.

In the past, we have been ready to accept that they’re not together… and then something gives us hope. We’ve gone through emotional whiplash over and over again. And we shouldn’t feel this way. This has nothing to do with our lives. Yet many of us are empaths and sense things and feel emotions greatly.

We’ve be happy. We’ve been upset. We’ve overanalyzed everything to death because we are puzzle people. We’re also romantics, and we want the happy ending we are ever-hoping for. We’ve grieved, told ourselves we need to leave this behind, and still, because of their light, believe in goodness, in light, and in love.

It would help everything if the bandaid would be pulled off. The people who need to grieve can grieve. The people who want to celebrate are able to. People will face the truth and stop blaming Luke or Nic or anyone else they are related to.

And we can get back to our pre-World Tour, “I can be the Ken for her”, days again whether we are grieving or celebrating.

[mariacallous]

The US Department of Justice has sued Ticketmaster and its parent company, Live Nation Entertainment, for abusing their alleged monopoly in the ticketing market to trample competitors.

Filed on Thursday in the Southern District of New York, the lawsuit focuses on Ticketmaster’s long-term exclusivity contracts with many of the largest music venues, making it the predominant ticketing service available to concertgoers. The firm secures these deals in part by “threatening and retaliating against venues that work with rivals,” the DOJ alleges.

In the complaint, the DOJ accuses Ticketmaster and Live Nation, which acts as a promoter for hundreds of high-profile artists, of exploiting their relationship to establish a “self-reinforcing flywheel” that blocks competitors from gaining a foothold. Live Nation parlays its exclusive promotion deals into exclusive ticketing deals with venues, the DOJ claims, which are left with no practical choice but to go with Ticketmaster, for fear of losing access to sought-after acts represented by its parent company. The DOJ is seeking to break up the joint organization.

“We allege that Live Nation relies on unlawful, anticompetitive conduct to exercise its monopolistic control over the live events industry in the United States at the cost of fans, artists, smaller promoters, and venue operators,” says attorney general Merrick Garland in a statement. “The result is that fans pay more in fees, artists have fewer opportunities to play concerts, smaller promoters get squeezed out, and venues have fewer real choices for ticketing services. It is time to break up Live Nation–Ticketmaster.”

In a lengthy statement provided to WIRED, Live Nation disputes the DOJ's allegation that it and Ticketmaster wield monopoly power. “The DOJ's lawsuit won't solve the issues fans care about relating to ticket prices, service fees, and access to in-demand shows,” the company says. “Calling Ticketmaster a monopoly may be a PR win for the DOJ in the short term, but it will lose in court because it ignores the basic economics of live entertainment, such as the fact that the bulk of service fees go to venues, and that competition has steadily eroded Ticketmaster’s market share and profit margin.”

The charges brought by the DOJ mirror allegations made previously against Ticketmaster in two ongoing private lawsuits.

In December 2022, Ticketmaster was sued by hundreds of Taylor Swift fans, who brought a case in response to a high-profile ticketing debacle that reportedly left them queuing for hours to pay for tickets that they had been assigned under an early access program, with many ultimately unable to claim their allocations. The incident led to a hearing by the Senate Judiciary Committee on consolidation in the ticketing industry and, reportedly, helped catalyze the investigation into Ticketmaster by the DOJ.

In their lawsuit, the Swift fans accused Ticketmaster of abusing its dominant position to impose “higher prices in the presale, sale, and resale market for concert tickets.” The company has “effectuated this anticompetitive scheme by forcing fans of musicians to use Ticketmaster exclusively to buy concert tickets,” the lawsuit alleged.

In the second case, a class action brought in 2022 on behalf of Ticketmaster customers in the US, Live Nation and Ticketmaster were accused of abusing the complementary relationship between their services to overcharge consumers and sustain their monopoly. “Live Nation controls the vast majority of the big national touring acts and, either explicitly or implicitly, coerces concert venues into selecting Ticketmaster as their ticketing service provider on pain of losing high-value acts,” claims Adam Wolfson, a partner at Quinn Emanuel, the law firm representing the plaintiffs.

This type of conduct, known as tying, was explicitly forbidden under the consent decree imposed upon Live Nation and Ticketmaster by the DOJ as a condition of their 2010 merger. “Our allegation is that they did it anyway,” says Wolfson. “Ticketmaster’s behavior is an open secret—everyone talks about it.”

In a corporate blog post published in March, Dan Wall, executive vice president of corporate and regulatory affairs at Live Nation, rejected allegations that Ticketmaster is driving up the price of tickets. The face value of a ticket is decided by the artist, he wrote, while the service charge—from which Ticketmaster draws its cut—is set by the venue.

In a call with reporters, a senior DOJ official described this line of defense as a “red herring” in the context of the alleged antitrust violations. “Our position is that removing the chokehold that Live Nation has at all levels of the ecosystem will be beneficial with respect to the way prices are set.”

A problem common to antitrust disputes, says Bradley Justus, an antitrust attorney at law firm Axinn, is the difficulty in distinguishing easily between practices that amount to anticompetitive behavior and those that might be considered sensible business strategy. The DOJ will argue that the exclusive deals entered into by Ticketmaster are categorically anticompetitive. “The antitrust question is: How extensive is the scope of those agreements? Are they truly so broad that another competitor couldn’t enter and scale?” says Justus.

The DOJ claims that the terms of the contracts mean that “venues cannot consider or choose rival ticketers or switch to better or more cost-effective ticketing technology.” The effect, it claims, is both to stifle competitors and minimize the pressure for Ticketmaster to improve its own product, to the detriment of concertgoers.

Although the DOJ has petitioned for Live Nation to be broken up, it has not outlined the specific structural changes it will go after, nor any injunctions it may try to impose with respect to the company’s exclusive contracts. “A breakup is absolutely on the table, but it’s important not to put the cart before the horse. In antitrust cases, any remedy has to be specifically tailored to the violation found,” a senior DOJ official told the press. “Based on the allegation that Live Nation and Ticketmaster have exerted control at every level of the ecosystem, aspects of the company need to be broken apart in order for competition to flourish in the live music industry.”

[blackmosscupcakes]

While I'm on the subject of Bells Hells' reactions to the events of last episode, I'm extremely interested in what's going to happen with Ashton. After all, only DAYS ago in-game, Ashton had their own mishap that resulted in the whole party being furious with them to varying degrees. And C3E78, their apology tour for that event, came with plenty of statements and promises on their part that have an awful lot of relevance to current events.

Ashton has always shown a high degree of awareness that this is a group teetering on the edge of darkness at any given time. His apologies in episode 78 tend to be loaded with assurances that he will forgive the others when it's their turn to make mistakes just as he hopes they will forgive him. Here's what he said to Chetney:

TALIESIN: Well, I'm glad you stopped. And I don't know, I'm processing a lot right now, but if I do stay, if you let me stay, the day something happens and it goes bad for you and you hurt a lot of people because, for any reason somebody gets in your head, something bad happens, something pushes you over the edge, something just fucking stupid. Stay or go, I promise that I will stick around, help clean it up. You will get no shit from me. None.

And here's what they said specifically to Laudna when she confronted them:

TALIESIN: I will, no matter what we do, no matter what mistakes we make, no matter what we have, I will stay and I will be there and I will not-- I will not walk away. I don't know what love is, but I'm going with this.

And they seem to be sticking to that promise! At the end of last episode they were very strongly by her side. He clearly sees (understandably, given his past) the act of sticking with someone no matter what to be one of the highest expressions of love. But sticking by someone doesn't mean signing off on all of their behaviour unchallenged, either. I also think it's relevant to look at what was in his mind when Imogen tried to read it:

TALIESIN: I think I've seen a pattern in my life and I've-- I'm going to just describe it instead of-- Just the realization of hubris and temptation and blame and this sudden realization of this epiphany of violent levels of projecting responsibility. Just this very wide thought of so many moments in life of not being responsible for what happened and suddenly going through that one by one of just, it took one week of vaguely knowing where I came from, and the only thing I really knew about these people was that they fucked up in this very particular way and it took me one week to do the exact fucking same thing. Because I was so desperate to have it and so desperate to have something that I lost so that I could be mad at someone for taking it.

They immediately took a step back and saw their responsibility for the way in which they hurt their friends, and so they expressed regret and apologies for that. He also saw how his actions were a way of reflecting his hurt back out into the world in the same way he was hurt. His father failed him, and his pain and trauma led him down the path of making a very similar mistake. I suspect all of this was on his mind in that moment where he took Laudna by the shoulder and whispered to her that she should start with an apology. They were hoping she would respond to it with that same introspection, but unfortunately a few things--not the least of which being Delilah--are in the way of that.

The question is what does he do next? He made a promise to walk beside, but (as I said above) that isn't necessarily a promise to unilaterally co-sign all of someone's actions, and I'd like to see a step forward in which Ashton uses their experience with the shard and what happened after to perhaps try and further encourage Laudna to make amends and communicate and come into the fold of the group instead of isolating herself. But I wonder if perhaps they do not feel that they have the right to say anything negative to her at all only days after the shard incident. But how does one reconcile that with a group member who risks becoming genuinely dangerous to your other loved ones if she continues down the path she's on?

[mangowillow]

last to know | ch. 2: as always, even now

pairing: jungkook x (f) reader / kim woosung x (f) reader

summary: you and jeongguk got together at 16 years old, married at 20, and divorced at 21. what was once love ever after turned into nothing but pain and unfulfilled dreams. you keep going despite the pain in your heart that never really went away, until one day, jungkook comes back— to seoul and in your life.

general story tags: divorce au, childhood friends, angst, hurt & eventual comfort, kind of a slow burn, OC is an adopted child in this fic, a lot of flashbacks later on because context is important; and the others that a lot of people seem to dislike: a love triangle and a LOT of miscommunication. look away if this isn't your thing. tags and warnings will be updated as we go along with each chapter!

warnings: mentions of weight loss and a hospital, jeongguk has a panic attack (semi-detailed), problematic parent-child dynamics. let me know if i miss anything and please be kind!

word count: 5.3k

author's note: *peeks into the void* why hello there! let's pretend i didn't disappear off the face of the earth. earlier this year i went to see The Rose live for their dawn to dusk tour and it was so much fun! there's just a lot of things that have happened and continue to do so; please accept my sincerest apologies for being inconsistent! BUT. know that i haven't forgotten about this story. heh.

also a few more things: ♡ to put things into perspective: jeongguk, OC/reader, and woosung are all the same age; that also means they're as old as seokjin and yoongi in this fic. all the other members maintain their age. honorifics may or may not appear at times. if that bothers you, well, can't please everybody! ♡ this fic isn't beta'd nor proofread by anyone. we go rogue, always.

tags for interested readers will be open for as long as this fic is ongoing! let me know in the comments or message me, whatever fits your preference!

fic masterlist

Woosung plants a big, sloppy kiss on your cheek and giggles.

Looking at him, you ask, “What was that for?”

“Do I need a reason?” Woosung teases as he chews on his jjajangmyeon. You chuckle at his candidness and reach out to wipe the sauce that landed on the corner of his lip. The both of you resorted to sitting on the floor, surrounded by boxes, using one of them as a makeshift table to place the food.

“I’m really happy you got to come today,” you muse, enjoying Woosung’s calming presence as he delicately places a piece of chicken karaage on your noodle bowl before setting his own down. You haven’t seen him for a few days because he needed to get some new music done in preparation for his application to a recording agency as a performer and a producer. You were more than happy to support him in any way you could, including giving him his space to figure things out. It was also who Woosung was— a quiet soul who liked working in solitude. 

You and Woosung are so much alike.

“Why? Did you think I’d forget?” Woosung teases, a smirk playing on his lips. 

“No, I just thought… maybe you needed more time to prepare for your application. That’s important.”

Woosung gently shakes his head, ready to disagree— “Nothing will ever be as important to me as you.”

A slight pink dusted your cheeks. You didn’t expect him to be this cheesy so early in the morning so you smile and cast your eyes back down to your meal. 

“... I do have news for you, babe.” Woosung starts. He turns his body to face you. Giving your hundred percent attention, you cut the noodles with your teeth and place the bowl down. Wiping your mouth with a napkin, you hum at his statement, “What is it?”

Woosung smiles and looks at you lovingly. You feel a bit self-conscious every time he stares at you so intensely and like clockwork, you feel your cheeks heat up. 

“I got the job, sweetheart.”

Hearing the news leave his lips leaves you surprised— your hands fly to your mouth and your eyes start to water. “R-really?” Woosung nods and chuckles through his own teary eyes, you throw yourself at him to give him a tight hug. “Woosung, oh my god— this is— “ you hold him by the shoulders, explore every inch of his face, elation in both of your hearts— “this is great, oh gosh I am so happy for you,” you hug him again. 

You feel Woosung’s body relax instantly in your hold; it has been a journey, walking with Woosung through his own painful moments struggling with his art and passion. Two years ago, he came to Seoul desperately needing a break from life and music after many unsuccessful attempts to make it into the music industry back home in the United States. Although he and his bandmates have put out several songs in the past, they never really gained as much traction with an audience as they had hoped. Going back home to his roots in South Korea also meant leaving his bandmates behind— they have been nothing but supportive of him and his time as they also needed to re-assess their own lives and figure out what they truly wanted. 

Two years ago, Woosung also met you. Both your lives changed ever since.

“Thank you for all your support, ____… you know I wouldn’t have been able to get through all this if it weren’t for you.” Woosung whispers, tightening his hold on your waist. You feel this, you feel everything when it comes to him— so you wrap your arms tighter around him, too. “This is all you, babe. This is all your hard work.”

You both stay that way for a while. Unspoken words are left hanging, as well. You both know well what might become of all this as you always try to communicate. You believe it is what has sustained your relationship for so long. 

Both of you know that Woosung will always belong to music— it’s his dream and the reason why he took so many risks along the way. It was only a matter of when. The possibilities have always been there— should there be a moment where Woosung would return to his career, to his band, to becoming a global star. The fears that come along with those possibilities were also ever-present: what you and Woosung’s future would look like. 

All of these thoughts come rushing to the both of you, but neither of you said anything.

For now, the both of you are happy. And that is enough.

When you parted from each other, you pushed away some of the hair that fell over Woosung’s eyes. “When do you start?”

Woosung takes a deep breath, “As soon as the higher-ups get settled in. I’ve been told they’ve recently landed in Seoul so it shouldn’t be too long now. I’ll be meeting with the owners and one of them is the lead producer. I heard he was a genius, but also a bit scary. They’ve also given me a signing bonus and a potential collaboration with him… that was new… he said they liked my work so much…”

“Wow, that… that sounds so exciting, baby. How are you feeling about all of this?”

“I’m nervous, for the most part,” Woosung murmurs, readjusting the collar of his shirt. It’s been a while since I talked to someone else about music professionally and… this company— I’ve heard so many wonderful things about it. For one, it was built by musicians, too. So I’m hoping they’re not just doing all of it for the business.” 

You smile warmly at Woosung and hold his hands. “You’re going to do great, you know that, right?”

Woosung draws in a breath and nods before meeting your eyes. 

That night, Woosung couldn’t sleep. He watches over you as you dream and when a strand of your hair falls on your face after moving a bit, he tucks it behind your ear. His fingers lightly dance while grazing the side of your face. Woosung sighs as a feeling of anxiety starts to creep into his heart. He loves change, but he cannot help but feel somewhat scared about it anyway. He gets so lost in his thoughts about you that he doesn’t notice you wake up.

“Baby, hey… you’re still awake.”

Your voice brings Woosung back to the present. Seeing your sleepy eyes under the sliver of moonlight that passes through your window makes his heart do a mini somersault— it always does.

“Hmm… I couldn’t sleep,” Woosung says. You scoot closer to him, his arm going under your shoulders to support your body in an embrace. 

“Tell me what’s on your mind,” you whisper, eyes closed, inhaling his scent— him. 

“Just… things. I’m not sure how to articulate them yet…”

You hum, “Then I’ll just stay like this with you to keep you warm… warmth helps you sleep, right?”

Woosung nods, bringing your body closer to his. “Hm… especially your warmth.” Seconds later, he feels you breathe deeper, letting him know that you’re about to let yourself succumb to sleep once more. “I love you.”

When no response came from you, Woosung closed his eyes. Then suddenly, in the stillness of the night, he feels your hand squeeze his ever so lightly.

“I love you, too.”

“Hyung, I think that’s the salt—” Jimin starts.

Seokjin snorts, stopping with the shaker in his hand mid-air, “What do you mean, Jimin-ah, I think I know the difference between salt and sugar.” He was about to potentially put salt on the croffle in front of him, leaving Jimin feeling both very nervous and distressed.

“Last time, I remember you put the sugar in a different container because a customer accidentally broke the original shaker. The color of the cap was blue, not red. This—” he pointed at the shaker Seokjin was holding, “— is obviously not blue.”

“Yah, that happened last week, but I already switched them out two days ago—” Seokjin tries to argue.

They didn’t notice Woosung enter the cafe until he spoke, “Why don’t you just taste it?”

“Oh hey, Woosung-hyung,” Jimin greets.

“Hey, Jimin. Good to see you,” Woosung replies as Jimin nods, his eyes turning into crescents as soon as he smiles.

Seokjin scoffs once more before greeting Woosung, but he relents and tastes whatever is inside the shaker. When he makes a funny face, Jimin and Woosung chuckle.

“Told ya, hyung. Tell us I saved your life.”

“I can’t believe this is salt, I knew I already switched it out—”

With possible disaster averted, Jimin doesn’t listen to Seokjin’s monologue anymore, “You’re here early today, hyung. Would you like to order the usual?”

“Actually, I am here to buy a mango parfait… ____’s fridge is crazy cold and the frozen mangoes are, well, too frozen. I might actually break the blender. I also forgot to make her usual overnight oats. We had to move a lot of things very quickly yesterday so she could have a bed to sleep on.”

“I got you, hyung. We just finished making a fresh batch of parfaits. Do you want one, too?” Jimin asks.

“Are there other flavors?”

“Blueberry and strawberry,” Seokjin adds.

“I’ll take one blueberry, then. Thanks.” Woosung gets ready to pay, but Seokjin waves him away. “It’s on the house.”

“You always give us free stuff, Seokjin—” Woosung tries to argue, but Seokjin shakes his head immediately.

“Taking care of my sister is more than enough, Woosung-ah.”

Woosung gives Seokjin a tight smile and nods. Seokjin then asks, albeit softer, “How is she doing lately?”

“She’s doing better,” Woosung reassures. “She has been painting more recently; not just because of her job at the university, but also at home. We’re going to set up her studio today so it should be fun.”

“That’s good to hear, right hyung?” Jimin turns to Seokjin, who nods. Jimin hands Woosung a paper bag with the parfaits. “I put some new desserts we’re experimenting with. Please give them a try.”

Woosung peeks at the paper bag and sees croissants and greenish muffins, presumably matcha-flavored. “Oh wow, thank you Jimin… I won’t take up too much of your time, guys. ____ is still sleeping and I need to clean up the mango disaster I left on her kitchen counter before she wakes up.”

Seokjin chuckles, “You really came all the way here for parfaits when you could have bought these anywhere near ____’s apartment.”

“Ah, but nothing beats your parfaits, Seokjin. A wise man once told me that,” Woosung smiles. He and Seokjin instantly formed a bond the moment they met two years ago, much to your relief. You’ve always been nervous to tell your brother anything remotely new about your love life— and you understand where he is coming from.

“Well whoever that wise man is must be pretty smart,” Seokjin replies. His eyes soften right afterward. “Go. Let’s have a drink sometime, yeah?”

“Sure thing,” Woosung waves goodbye to Seokjin and Jimin.

Jeongguk walks the hallway of the recording studio, still groggy from sleep. Hands in his pockets, he stood outside Yoongi’s door, staring at his peculiar mat: a cat with its middle finger raised, the words ‘fuck off’ glaring at him. Figures, he thought. A doormat won’t stop him from ringing Yoongi’s doorbell, though.

“Who is it?” he hears Yoongi call out.

“It’s your favorite person in the whole wide world,” Jeongguk says, sarcasm lacing his voice. He pinched the bridge of his nose; a habit he developed in college whenever he felt the exhaustion seep out of him. He hears scuffling from the other side of the door until the sound of the door’s automatic lock rings. Jeongguk sees Yoongi clad in a plaid shirt, ripped jeans, and a gray beanie— his signature style. 

“Dumbass,” Yoongi mutters under his breath before turning his back to return to his equipment. “Good morning to you too,” Jeongguk teases as he closes the door behind him. 

“How are you already set up? It’s barely a day since we arrived!”

Yoongi chooses not to respond. 

“You’re kidding me, right?” Jeongguk asks in disbelief. “Please tell me you at least went home to get your shit sorted? Or maybe sleep like normal human beings do?”

“I did… for a brief moment, maybe?” Yoongi starts.

Jeongguk shakes his head, “You have to stop spreading yourself thin, Yoongi. It’ll be the death of you.”

Yoongi fiddles with a few knobs on the synthesizer before muttering, “That doesn’t seem so bad— spreading myself too thin, that is.”

Jeongguk throws his hands up in surrender and rolls his eyes.

“Have I succeeded in frustrating you to hell and back, yet?” Yoongi smirks while continuing to flit his eyes through the numerous screens in front of him.

Jeongguk was about to say something but then the door alarm clicked. Kim Namjoon’s head peeks out from behind the door.

“I came to say my welcome remarks,” Namjoon says as he lets himself in. Jeongguk’s mouth falls open because he couldn’t believe Namjoon could just easily waltz in without any resistance. What’s even more astounding was that he knew Yoongi’s passcode— while he, on the other hand, had to ring the fucking doorbell.

“Oh, great. So your boyfriend knows your passcode and I don’t?” Jeongguk asks.

“He isn’t my boyfriend,” Yoongi states, matter-of-factly. Jeongguk couldn’t help but glance at Namjoon’s way, who seemed unfazed.

“Right, and I’m Neil Armstrong,” Jeongguk plops down on the couch.

“You’re the CEO, Jeongguk, of course, you should know the passcode… right, Yoongi?” says Namjoon, ever the oblivious one. 

Yoongi continues to do work on his computer, his fingers deftly flying across his keyboard, “Don’t encourage him, Namjoon.”

Namjoon looks back at Jeongguk who has now taken an interest in the plant beside the couch. When they met each other’s eyes, Namjoon just shrugged, his dimples showing. 

“How was your flight, you guys? I hope everything was easy peasy.”

“Easy peasy lemon squeezy,” Jeongguk responds. “Not sure about Yoongi here though. He looked like he was about to puke.”

“Shut up,” Yoongi retaliates.

“I can’t imagine the both of you tolerating each other while in another country. It’s a miracle this production company is still standing upright,” Namjoon says chuckling. 

Namjoon met Jeongguk first in university while they studied in New York. Although Jeongguk was a business student and Namjoon double majored in music theory and composition, they ran into each other at a frat party-— with Jeongguk being drunk off his ass. He was about to fall into the pool full of piss (which the other frat members thought was funny) when Namjoon saved him in the nick of time. 

Apart from Yoongi, Namjoon also served as Jeongguk’s confidant, especially after things went south between you and Jeongguk. When the dust settled and Jeongguk was sober enough to realize the gravity of his mistakes, Namjoon helped Yoongi pick up the pieces of Jeongguk’s brokenness. As with time passing by, Namjoon and Yoongi started to develop into something more, too. Much to Jeongguk’s delight and envy.

However, neither Yoongi nor Namjoon has admitted their feelings to the other. And truth be told, Jeongguk is sick of them dancing around each other.

But he also knows it’s none of his business.

“Hey, Jeongguk, is that family dinner of yours still happening tonight?” Yoongi decides to ask. Also probably to change the subject.

Jeongguk lets out a deep sigh. “Yes, it is.”

“Ouch. Will you be alright?” Namjoon asks out of genuine concern.

“I don’t really have a choice.”

“You always have a choice, Jeongguk-ah,” Yoongi inserts. “You just need to work on making the right ones.”

Jeongguk slacks his jaw and runs his tongue across his lip ring. He doesn’t really have an answer to that.

Because once again, Yoongi was right. Not just about the damn family dinner; Jeongguk also knows his best friend’s words run deeper and imply a whole lot more than just feeling forced to sit down with his parents over steak and champagne.

“See you on the other side, then,” Namjoon says as he pats Jeongguk on the shoulder before leaving the room.

Jeongguk mulled over bringing flowers to the family dinner but decided against it.

He knows that the house would be filled with them, anyway. And his efforts won’t matter, either.

As he got out of his car, a chauffeur was already by his side ready to take his keys for him. When the car drove off, Jeongguk took a moment to look at the house he hadn’t lived in for years. It feels odd to come home; it feels even odder to feel numb about all of it.

It took Jeongguk a few seconds to ring the doorbell; for god’s sake, it was his house too, he thought. Ringing the doorbell meant he was a stranger— which he felt was appropriate.

He was greeted by a new housekeeper. He gave her a nod before stepping inside. Almost instantly, his mother appeared at the top of the staircase. They look at one another for a moment, before his mother breaks the silence.

“You finally decide to show yourself.”

Jeongguk doesn’t move. Doesn’t respond, either. He was prepared for a stare-off match with his mother, but that was until his father showed up from the kitchen. With a dish towel in hand, Jeongguk’s father smiled at him as he placed a hand on his son’s shoulder.

“It’s so good to see you, son.”

Jeongguk, once more, doesn’t have it in him to respond.

At the dinner table, the silence was so loud, that Jeongguk thought it could break glass.

“Did you settle in fine, Jeongguk?” his father asks.

“Yes, father, I did.”

“You should have chosen a place that was nearer to us, Jeongguk,” his mother chides.

“Honey…” Jeongguk’s father tries to put out a fire that is about to ignite. Jeongguk, on the other hand, was so tired from the flight and emotionally, that he felt a need to retaliate.

Because why not? Whether he speaks up or not wasn’t really up to him. Between him and his mother, he has nothing to lose.

“I don’t know, mother, I chose that place because I wanted to get away from here as much as possible.” Jeongguk remarks. He knows he hit a nerve because his mother downed her champagne rather than respond.

“How is the company going, son? Everything doing alright?” his father asks, trying to mitigate a conflict that neither of them could recover from.

“I guess. Yoongi and I haven’t managed to burn anything so that’s nice,” Jeongguk eats a spoonful of mashed potato. He knows he really needs to shut up and regulate his emotions, but he just can’t help but be sarcastic.

Once more, the silence won. However, Jeongguk’s mother is the type to not back down.

“You should think about getting married soon, Jeongguk—” she starts. Jeongguk feels himself grow cold as if on instinct. 

“—and this time, we want you to marry someone your level,” she finishes. Jeongguk felt his heart twisting so painfully that he didn’t notice how tight he held on to his cutlery.

Jeongguk swallows the once-repressed pain that used to consume him whole. He knows this is futile because he never dares to face his regrets square in the face. Instead, he allows the pain to make him angry. He allows his resentment to consume him in ways he doesn’t know how to handle and in a pained effort to avoid causing further damage, he remains quiet. Unresponsive. Cold. Withdrawn.

But his own mother is even more cold-hearted than he is. She is the one who made him like this.

It’s her fault.

“You need to marry a good woman who can keep up with your social status. Remember you’re not just anyone, Jeongguk. You’re a Jeon. And you have a legacy to uphold,” his mother condescends. 

Tears start to sting Jeongguk’s eyes, but he doesn’t want to let his mother win. So he keeps still.

“I have a few prospects for you, dear. We should set dates for them, don’t you think so? I chose the most refined and educated—” Jeongguk hates how his mother knows how to push his buttons and hurt him.

He knows that his mother knows his ultimate weakness.

You.

And because his mother cannot contain her insecurities and prejudice, she projects it all on her son. But most especially, you— whether you were in the room or not.

Jeongguk’s mother continues her monologue. His father miserably fails to become the referee (he always does). Heat starts to rise Jeongguk’s neck and he swears he could hear his own blood pumping through his ears. What almost immediately follows is the high-pitched ringing that only he can hear. 

Jeongguk starts to feel dizzy; like he’s about to lose control.

But instead of releasing, instead of crying, instead of getting angry— he does none of them. 

He finds himself standing up, his hands dragging the plate full of food to the ground. With all his might, Jeongguk tries to breathe deeply.

“That’s enough, mom.” Jeongguk croaks. A tear escapes his eye. “Please.”

Jeongguk rarely addresses her as “mom”. But in times of vulnerability and helplessness, it’s the term he ends up using.

“As I expected… you are still weak, Jeongguk.” his mother states with absolutely no remorse.

Jeongguk feels like he is about to throw up. To save himself, he drags his legs to leave the dining area. Housekeepers try to help him, but he brushes them aside. Security guards around the house up until the gate tried to support him, but Jeongguk just waved them all off.

He just needed to get away before his vision completely blurred. He needed to get out of this godforsaken house.

It was a miracle that Jeongguk got far away from the house as he had. But in doing so, he felt physically weaker and weaker. His mind isn’t done with him yet as thoughts of you start to resurface. His chest starts to tighten again. He feels cold and afraid and tired.

Jeongguk falls to his knees on the side of the road; he allows his body to go limp and fall to the ground. 

He barely remembers what happened next.

When Jeongguk opens his eyes, bright, stale lights greet him. 

He hears beeping, faint footsteps, a voice over an intercom.

He feels something brushing his leg so gently that it takes him a while before realizing that someone is standing over him, wiping the edge of his slacks.

Jeongguk squints his eyes to get a better look at the person touching his leg. When he tries to elevate his upper body, the person in front of him feels him moving.

Jeongguk couldn’t believe who he was seeing. His panic attack must still be happening because it was impossible.

It was you.

“Oh… hi,” you start. Jeongguk is at a loss for words so he continues to stare at you.

You immediately feel self-conscious so you start to wrangle the damp cloth you were holding. 

“Are you okay? Hang on, I’ll call the nurse—”

You start to leave, but Jeongguk catches your wrist. He doesn’t know what he’s doing. You look at his hand on your wrist before Jeongguk lets go of it.

“W-what happened?”

“You’re at the hospital… um, I– I got a call from them saying you were here,” you say.

Jeongguk’s eyebrows met. He is still confused as to how or why the hospital would call you. As he looks at you, in the flesh, in front of him, the familiar ache in his chest threatens to overwhelm him again.

You look as beautiful as ever, even more so than the last time he saw you. The last time he did, you were crying to him. He did that to you. That was his fault.

“Are you hurt, anywhere, Jeongguk? I think I need to call your doctor, just give me a second—”

“No… please. I’m okay. I don’t feel any pain.” Except for my broken heart.

“Oh… okay.”

Jeongguk observes you, more particularly your hands. You still have that habit of fiddling with your fingers when you didn’t know what to do, he thinks. 

“H-how did the hospital call you? You didn’t change your number?” Jeongguk is a hundred percent sure his choice of questions was dumb, but he doesn’t have any idea as to why you’re here.

“The hospital told me I was your emergency contact… they uh– they only found your wallet on you and found this,” you explain as you handed him his wallet. Inside was an old piece of paper with your emergency contact number and e-mail address.

“The e-mail address is now defunct, but my number is still the same because I had it reactivated when I came back here…”

When I came back here, Jeongguk repeated to himself. 

Jeongguk wanted to ask you a million questions, but his throat feels dry and he is unable to speak. 

“I um, I also called Yoongi. He should be here any minute,” you continue. When Jeongguk looks at you funny, you give him a small smile— the first one you’ve given him since he woke up. “We talk sometimes.”

There is a lot of information that Jeongguk needs to process but his head hurts a lot and he makes a mental note to interrogate his friend later.

You move to grab and open the plastic bag that is on the bedside table. You pull out a pair of black socks. Jeongguk sees you hesitate a bit before speaking again.

“I got these across the street… your socks got wet from the rain.”

“Oh.” Jeongguk feels really dumb.

“May I?” you tentatively ask. “Your feet will get cold if we don’t—and you have the IV on so you won’t be able to use your hands—”

“It’s okay…” Jeongguk’s response startles you. “Thank you.”

You nod and sit by his feet to put on the new socks. Jeongguk feels the tears again but he tries to hold them back as he feels your touch and your warm fingers graze his bare, cold skin. When you’re done putting them on him, you smile to yourself.

“Does that feel better?” you ask.

Jeongguk nods and hums. He took his time to look at you and to his mild surprise, you reciprocated. A sense of stillness seemed to occur like time stopped just so Jeongguk could fully take in the sight of you.

He hurriedly tries his best to memorize all your features—old and new. Your face is smaller, your cheekbones higher; both indicative of you losing a bit of weight since he saw you last. Your eyes are softer, but also more tired. You also grew out your hair. 

To Jeongguk, you are still so beautiful.

And he missed you so much that his heart hurt again at the thought of losing you.

“How are y—” Jeongguk tries to ask, but the door to his hospital room slid open, revealing a disheveled Yoongi.

“Jeongguk, are you okay? What happened?”

Jeongguk notices you quickly moving aside to give Yoongi room. 

“I’m fine, Yoongi. I guess I just passed out and—”

“You had another panic attack, Jeongguk. That’s the second time this week. Have you taken your medication?”

Yoongi’s string of questions had Jeongguk feeling anxious. He just had the unexpected chance of seeing you again but under the most dire circumstances. Surely, it wasn’t the time for you to hear about his mental health issues.

“Yoongi, can we—” Jeongguk tried to save face, but Yoongi was faster. 

Yoongi turns to you and hugs you. “I’m sorry, ____, you must have been so confused.”

“No, not at all, I’m… I’m glad I could be of help,” you reassure. More so for Jeongguk because you know this must be very awkward for him. 

A bit of awkwardness did happen because none of you spoke for a bit. Your phone ringing was the only saving grace.

“Hello? Oh, okay. I’ll be right out,” you answer the other person on the line. Hanging up, you say, “Um… I should get going.”

“Is someone picking you up?” Yoongi asks.

“Yes, Taehyung’s just a few minutes away,” you answer.

Yoongi nods and pulls you in for another hug. He whispers his thanks and you respond by hugging him tighter.

You also approach Jeongguk a little closer. “Take care of yourself, Jeongguk.” You see the pain in his eyes, but you refuse to acknowledge it to yourself, even if Jeongguk’s eyes were brimming with unshed tears and his nose was already pink.

Jeongguk doesn’t want you to go. But again, he has no choice but to let you.

“You too, ____.”

As soon as you close the door, Jeongguk allows his tears to fall.

As soon as you get into the car, Taehyung asks his questions.

“Why the hell did you just come out of a hospital?”

“Tae—”

“Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere? You’re the only one there? What happened?” You can feel the panic rising in Taehyung as he inspects you, but you just chuckle.

“Yah—you laugh?”

“I’m fine, Taehyung,” you tell him but he doesn’t look convinced. “I really am.”

“Then why were you in there?”

“I saw Jeongguk again, Tae,” you calmly respond.

Taehyung freezes. “You’re joking, right?”

“I’m not,” you answer.

“And you’re… are you okay?”

“I am.”

Taehyung knows you better than that but he gives you a pass because he could also tell you were tired and your short answers mean that you didn’t want to talk just yet.

“Do you want to talk about it over ice cream and fries?”

For a second, you felt tempted, but you just also wanted to go home. “Maybe some other time, Taehyung.”

Taehyung understands immediately and nods. “Should I take you to Woosung hyung or do I take you home?”

You do want to see Woosung because you know he is what you need, but you also don’t want to burden him with a bombshell of an event so you opt to be alone for the night. “Take me home, please.”

“Okay, ____,” Taehyung answers.

The rest of the car ride was a quiet one.

The short walk in the hallway leading to your home is a heavy one. As you punch in your passcode, you deeply sigh. You want nothing more than to collapse on the bed and ruminate on what just happened over the past few hours.

However, the moment you open the door, a wave of delicious scents welcomes you home. As you take off your shoes, you see a familiar pair. You smile to yourself as you place yours beside it. 

You enter your home further and see Woosung with his back to you, working his way in the kitchen. As if on cue, Woosung turns around and walks toward you. 

“Hey you,” you say with a smile.

“Hi,” Woosung responds, gathering you in his arms and pulling you into a tight embrace. “Did you have a good day, today?”

You feel yourself swallow once before nodding. Woosung, ever the sensitive boyfriend, holds you tighter.

You know you can’t hide from him. So you hold on to him tighter, too.

And you allow yourself to break down and cry.

Woosung feels your body shake and he runs his hand across your back to soothe you. 

He may not know what’s going on right now, but he also knows you will talk to him when you’re ready. So he continues to embrace you; kissing the side of your head after a while.

Woosung whispers against your ear, “You’re safe with me, sweetheart.”

taglist: @whoa-jo @nays2112 @junecat18 @jk97bam @butterymin @smdnai

tags for interested readers will be open for as long as this fic is ongoing! let me know in the comments or message me, whatever fits your preference!

[bonesandthebees]

Has Tommy(innit) said anything about whats all happening?

About Wilbur?

also could you explain whats going on, please?

I kind of know but not too well, I just woke up, got news Wilbur abused someone, and everyone saying 'fuck wilbur'.

I will not support anyone who supports abuse in any way, but please understand that this is quite a shock to wake up too.

oh man I am feeling so bad for people who haven't been aware of anything that's been going on the past week

alright, a week ago Shubble (aka Shelby), a popular mcyt streamer/youtuber who has been in the scene for a very long time, did a stream talking about her last relationship. she didn't name her ex-boyfriend, but discussed all the ways in which he physically and emotionally abused her throughout their relationship and how she didn't realize it until later. their stream was largely meant to spread awareness of domestic abuse and the warning signs of it. and although they didn't name him, the details they mentioned about their ex made it pretty clear wilbur soot was their ex. twitter blew up talking about it, some people tried to claim shelby wouldn't want them to speculate so she made a tweet saying it's not that she didn't want to name her abuser, it's that she couldn't. since everyone had already been theorizing it was wilbur it was pretty well understood at this point that if their abuser wasn't wilbur, they would've said so. alongside this, a trumpeter who used to tour with lovejoy and a photographer for the band both heavily implied shelby's ex was wilbur.

after trending for five days straight on twitter with everyone talking about the allegations, wilbur posted a statement yesterday confirming that yes, he is the ex shelby was referring to, and 'apologized' for his behavior. except his apology brushed aside all of the emotional abuse he put her through, and in the same statement he claimed he thought the physical abuse (where he would bite her all the time to the point of her being covered in bruises) was consensual and a 'playful' thing despite the fact that shelby explained it was anything but. basically, his apology was dogshit and was him trying to avoid taking any kind of accountability for what he put her through. many many cc's in the twitch sphere, including wilbur's former circle of friends, replied pointing out how terrible his apology was.

tommy has not said anything yet, but also I don't expect him to say anything so soon. he just had surgery, like, what, 2 weeks ago? pretty sure he's still hopped up on pain meds. not to mention, he and wilbur have been incredibly close friends since tommy was 16. it's not easy to come to terms with the fact that someone you've known since you were 16 and looked up to as an older brother is not the person you thought they were.

alongside that, ranboo streamed yesterday and discussed the situation. they've been vocal in their support of shelby on twitter, and also told their viewers to give other cc's time for a response. they pointed out a lot of their friends are only just now learning what kind of person wilbur really is. they also said that some other cc's might not make statements at all and might just silently distance themselves from wilbur.

also, shelby herself liked this tweet yesterday

so yeah, I wouldn't expect to hear from tommy directly on this for a while, if ever. I also wouldn't be surprised if he just silently distances himself from wilbur instead of saying anything outright.

[koyagifs]

𝓯𝓪𝓭𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓯𝓲𝓻𝓮

pairing: mingi x reader au: idol | lovers to ex lovers genre: angst word count: 1.496 words summary: mingi struggles to accept that you're gone. warning(s): death! mentions of severe depression and suicidal thoughts.

The wind howled, whipping through the trees, their branches bending and swaying in the tempest. Each crack of thunder seemed to echo the turmoil within. Puddles formed on the ground, reflecting the fleeting flashes of light, as if nature itself were in a fierce debate. Mingi stood at your grave, flowers held in his hand as the rain poured onto him. His tears mixed as he slowly placed the flowers down, the vibrant petals now heavy with water. Each drop felt like a heartbeat, a reminder of the life that once was. He knelt, his fingers brushing the damp earth, tracing the letters of your name carved into the stone. Memories flooded back—laughter shared, whispered secrets, dreams painted in bright colors.

As the storm raged around him, Mingi's heart ached with the weight of loss. The thunder roared, a cruel mimicry of his own grief, yet in that chaos, he found a flicker of solace. It's officially been a year since your death, a year since your killer has not been caught.

He was overseas, on tour with his band mates when he got the call. He had just finish performing, coming down from his high from the adrenaline that had surged through him on stage. The cheers of the crowd still echoed in his ears when the phone rang, shattering the euphoria in an instant. He could still remember the way his heart sank as he heard the news, disbelief twisting into a raw, gut-wrenching pain. The world had tilted on its axis, and nothing felt real anymore. How he let out a gut felt cry as he fell to his knees, the staff and members rushing to his side in confusion as Mingi was sobbing uncontrollably.

Their concerned faces blurred in his memory, but he could still hear their voices—urgent, panicked, trying to pull him back from the abyss. He remembered the warmth of their hands on his shoulders, grounding him, yet nothing could ease the storm inside. The vibrant lights of the stage had dimmed, replaced by an overwhelming darkness that swallowed him whole.

Of course the rest of the tour was cancelled, KQ immediately putting out a statement, Mingi taking a hiatus to process the loss that had shattered his world. He retreated from the spotlight, the fame and energy of the stage now feeling like a distant echo.

As another lighting strike, the thunder booming in the distance, bringing Mingi back to reality. He blinked, the memory of that chaotic time flooding back as he stood at your grave, rain soaking through his clothes. The storm felt like a reflection of his inner turmoil, a reminder that he was still navigating through uncharted waters of grief. The air crackled with electricity, mirroring the tension coiled within him.

Mingi took a deep breath, steadying himself against the biting wind. Each flash of lightning illuminated the world around him for just a heartbeat, but in those brief moments, he saw your face clearly. He remembered your laughter, the way your eyes sparkled with life, and how you always found light even in the darkest situations.

" i'm so sorry" he cried out, snot running down not caring how he looked.

Mingi felt empty, unable to bring himself back to the person he was before. The weight of his sorrow felt like an anchor, dragging him deeper into a sea of despair. Each sob that tore from his throat echoed in the storm, mingling with the thunder as if the heavens themselves were weeping with him. “I should have been there,” he lamented, the words heavy with guilt.

He sank to his knees in the mud, the cold earth grounding him even as his heart shattered. Memories flashed through his mind—moments they had shared, plans they had made. It felt so cruel that life had taken you away, leaving him to grapple with the pieces of a world that no longer made sense.

“I don’t know how to do this without you,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper, lost amidst the rain. In that moment of vulnerability, he allowed the tears to flow freely, releasing the pain he had held inside for far too long.

" we were so close to be reunited but Yunho found me... I just wanted to see you" Mingi mumbled, goosebumps covering his body.

The thought of that day still haunted him, the moment when everything changed. He had felt a pull, a desperate urge to be with you, to escape the pain of your absence. But Yunho had found him just in time, pulling him back from the edge, grounding him in reality.

“I was so lost,” Mingi confessed, shivering as the wind howled around him. “I thought if I could just be with you, everything would make sense again.” The memory of Yunho's worried face flashed through his mind, the way his friend had held him, shaking him, urging him to stay in the world of the living.

But now, here he was, still feeling the weight of that longing, the emptiness that gnawed at his heart. “I wanted to believe that I could find you,” he continued, his voice breaking. “That we could laugh again, make new memories. But all I have is this.” He gestured to the grave, frustration mixing with grief.

Feeling the rain stop, he looked up to see an umbrella covering his body as the holder stood there. Pity laced on his figure as he squatted down to Mingi level.

" Mingi..."

There stood your mother, her heart aching to see the boy that had clearly loved her daughter look so broken.

Mingi’s heart skipped a beat as he met her gaze, the warmth of the umbrella contrasting sharply with the chill of the rain-soaked ground. Her presence was a bittersweet reminder of everything he had lost, yet it also felt like a lifeline in that moment of despair.

“Yunho told me you’d be here,” she said softly, her voice filled with tenderness. There was an undeniable pain in her eyes, a shared sorrow that bound them together in their grief. “I know this isn’t easy.”

He struggled to find words, his throat tight with emotion. “I—I’m so sorry for everything,” he managed to say, the weight of his guilt crashing over him again. “I wish I could have done more.”

Her gaze softened, and she shook her head gently. “You loved her. That’s more than enough.” She reached out, placing a hand on his shoulder, grounding him in the moment. “She adored you, Mingi. You brought her so much joy.”

A fresh wave of tears threatened to spill over, and Mingi felt a rush of gratitude mixed with sadness. He wanted to reach out, to tell her how much your laughter had meant to him, how every moment they shared was a treasure. Instead, he found himself nodding, overwhelmed by the connection they now shared.

“I don’t know how to move forward without her,” he admitted, his voice shaking. “I feel so lost.”

Her expression turned resolute. “We’re both lost,” she said softly. “But we can carry her memory together. You have a part of her in you, Mingi. She lives on in the love you shared, in the music you create.”

Mingi took a deep breath, her words wrapping around him like a comforting embrace. He stood up, your mother following along as she placed a hand on his back for comfort.

" There was one more thing she asked me to give to you" your mother spoke, catching Mingi breath as he looked at her. Your mother pulled out a small, weathered envelope from her coat pocket, its edges slightly frayed.

She held it out to Mingi, her expression a mixture of sadness and hope. “She wanted you to have this, once you had enough time to grieve but there is never enough time dear.”

Mingi took the envelope, feeling the weight of it in his hands. It was a tangible connection to you, a piece of your presence that he had longed for. His heart raced as he carefully opened it, revealing a folded piece of paper inside.

Tears streamed down Mingi’s face as he absorbed your words, each line echoing with the warmth of your spirit. He felt a surge of emotions—grief, love, and an unexpected sense of relief. It was as if you had reached through the veil of loss, wrapping him in your comfort.

He looked up at your mother, her eyes glistening with understanding. With a small nod, Mingi followed your mother back to his car where stood his bandmates. As Mingi approached, he saw Yunho, Wooyoung, and San gathered around, their faces filled with concern and solidarity. They had been waiting anxiously, knowing how difficult this moment would be for him. As the words from your letter echoed in his mind, he finally released a breath he hadn't realize that he was holding. In that moment, he knew, he'll be okay.

[evereverest2]

Roses — Terzomega

~part five of the Little Monster Series~

2.4k words ~ (light) smut

Days after his last encounter with Terzo, Omega finds himself in the ministry garden.

[parts]: one | previous | next

[author note:] early upload because the last part reached my goal of 50 likes! thank u everyone. for an early upload of part 6, get this one to 100 likes (i made it harder). otherwise, see you next wednesday ;)

—

“You need to get laid.”

The snickering jab came from Earth, who sizzled his cymbal for effect. Air laughed.

Omega’s tail flicked angrily. Having been warming up, he continued to practice with an edge of frustration, not giving Earth a reaction. His fingers climbed the guitar’s neck, quick as lightning, turning into an angry, shrill chromatic scale that left the guitar screaming its highest note through the crackling amp.

“He’s been so uptight,” River sighed, plucking a dark note from his bass.

“Ignoring us,” Air added with a random piano riff. “Too busy to say hi.”

“I’m right here,” Omega snapped. The four ghouls looked up from their instruments. The sound-proof practice room filled with dead air.

It was Alpha who finally spoke up. “You gotta admit it’s been a while, Megs.”

“Since what?”

“Since you got laid,” Earth interjected, hitting his bass drum a few times to punctuate his statement. 

River and Air burst into childish giggles. Omega’s brow furrowed with annoyance. Alpha laughed, a carefree sound, before shaking his head. “Nah. I mean, maybe, but nah. It’s you, man. When’s the last time we all hung out?”

“Last week,” Omega replied tersely.

“That was practice,” River said in his sullen voice. “You hardly spoke at all.”

“Yeah, like, really hung out. We used to do it all the time, right?” Alpha looked around at the other ghouls. There was a chorus of agreement.

“Why are we even practicing?” Omega huffed, suddenly frustrated. “There’s no new music and no tour date scheduled yet.”

More silence. Finally, Alpha said, “I mean, besides the obvious to keep ourselves fresh, it’s the only time we ever see you.”

“I’m busy.”

“We know, Megs. It’s not fair they make you do all that shit.”

“That’s why you gotta do your own shit, right?” Earth was relentless, laughing boisterously.

Air tilted his head, smiling suggestively. “If you need your dick sucked, you know I’m happy to do it.”

“We all want to suck your dick, Omega,” River sighed.

Omega, fed up, threw his guitar on the ground. The amp made a painful shriek that made everyone except Omega flinch.

“Megs–” Alpha tried.

Omega snarled at him, snapping his teeth. They locked eyes for a moment. Fiery red glaring into lightning purple. He growled, “We’re done here.”

He stomped out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

Every Sibling unlucky enough to see his terrifying rampage turned the other way, disappearing inside doorways, avoiding his path. There was no destination to his rageful stalking, his pacing of the Ministry. He just wanted to clear his head, to get away from the ghouls, to take one single moment of the day to himself, to think. 

At an intersection between halls, he felt a breeze gently blowing down an empty corridor, one that led to a glass door cracked open by a rock. The garden. The air was cool against his heated disposition. Refreshing. Inviting.

Omega detoured down the hall, slipping outside and carefully ensuring the door remained open. It automatically locked, and the only way to get back inside was to walk around the expansive compound through the front door.

The sky was cloudy blue, overcast but not quite raining. It was warm enough to be comfortable with a coat, though the breeze was cold and light, giving Omega goosebumps. He took deep breaths, smelling the air, calming himself. 

The plants around him were dying in the early fall, some still green, others withering away. The one plant that stood against the seasons was a dark red rose bush, though little remained of the blooms. He noticed, on the pathway, a handful of rose petals, which were bigger than any of the current flowers growing on the bush. Confused, he looked around, seeing another one further down the path. 

He walked forward, stepping around a hedge to see the very rose he had been searching for, clutched in the hands of the last man in the Ministry he wanted to see.

Cardinal Terzo was sat on an ornate concrete bench, looking down and spinning the thorny rose between his fingers. The bench was in a small clearing that looked over a garden of dead flowers, the back surrounded by hedges to create an apse in the walkway. Omega knew it was Primo’s favorite spot, and it surprised him that the old man was not there instead of Terzo. Of course, it was too cold to tend to the fauna in early autumn.

Terzo looked up at the intrusion. He looked sad. Not miserable, not pitiful, but simply sad. Then, he smiled at Omega. His frustration disappeared in an instant, leaving room to sense Terzo’s state of mind. Indeed, he was sad, mourning, his mind mulling over something in particular. But it was not all-consuming. There was a spark of happiness, and it came from seeing Omega.

“Hello, Omega ghoul. Care to join me?”

Omega hesitated. Suddenly, he felt as if he should not be there, and looked away. Terzo said, “Do not be frightened, ghoul. I do not bite.”

Omega relented, shuffling over to the bench and sitting on the edge. He stared at the collection of browning and dead flowers, wondering why Terzo was so welcoming of his presence. Since their tepid encounter days ago, they had yet to even see one another, let alone resolve the tension between them. 

“I was surprised to see this rose today,” Terzo said, breaking the silence. “The bush looks dead. Look how big and red it is.”

He held up the rose. Omega regarded it. 

“It’s dead now,” he pointed out.

“It was soon to die anyway.” Terzo held it to his nose, smelling it deeply. “Roses were mi mamma’s favorite. That is not a very uncommon favorite, is it?”

Omega shook his head.

“Many people love this flower. Yet I can only think of mamma when I see it. No one else will think of that, si? It is mi mamma’s flower. To you, you may look at this flower and think nothing of it. To me, mamma is what makes roses special.”

Omega’s tail flicked back and forth on the bench contentedly. He nodded along to Terzo’s musings. Surprisingly, this gentle atmosphere was soothing him from his outburst at the ghouls, and finally, he could calm down. 

“Is that why you’re out here?”

Terzo nodded. “Two years ago yesterday, I buried mi mamma with roses. I was hoping there would be one left in the garden.”

Omega thought to say something. To give his condolences, to ask how she died, to ask how he was doing, any number of things. Instead, he choked. And before he could think of anything of comfort, Terzo spoke again.

“What brings you to this garden, Omega ghoul?”

Relieved for the topic change, Omega sighed, shaking his head. “Nothing important. I’m taking a break.”

“From?”

“From… everything,” he chuckled slightly. “I’m exhausted.”

“Ah. It is hard, si? They say, eh, you work for Satan, then they say, eh, you must do all these things. It is like a business, not a church. Why, we are no better than the Catholics.”

Omega looked at Terzo, surprised. Though Omega may not have fully acknowledged them before, Terzo had just voiced the very feelings that he had been plagued by for far too long.

“Yeah,” he sighed, then laughed despite himself. “That’s it. I’m the only quintessence ghoul, and they give me too many responsibilities. Trivial, meaningless things anyone could handle, all because of my element.”

“You delegate then, si?” Terzo began pointing at invisible people. “You do this, and you do this. Lower your stress.”

“I don’t have the authority to do that.” Omega sighed.

“They expect too much out of you. They always do.”

Omega looked at Terzo, slowly plucking the petals from the rose. They naturally fell silent, both watching as dark petals drifted to the ground until the rose stem was barren.

“Now I have really killed it,” Terzo said, dropping the stem. He pushed his hair back, sitting up. “I can never help myself from ruining nice things.”

“It’s not always your fault.” Omega leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “That rose was dead anyway.”

“Si. But how much longer could it have lived?”

“Maybe it would have died today.”

“Or maybe it would have lived through winter,” Terzo chuckled. “But it does not matter. You cannot bring back a dead rose.”

Omega stared at Terzo. After a moment, Terzo noticed, catching his eye. Omega swallowed thickly, looking down at the remnants of the flower, breaking their eye contact.

“Maybe we can.”

“Hm?”

Omega rubbed his hands together a few times, his fingers suddenly feeling cold with the breeze. He chastised himself for feeling so nervous. He looked at Terzo again.

The words escaped his mind like air from a deflating balloon. All that was left was his eyes, rimmed by black, always seeing through him, piercing him like arrows. And his lips. One plump pink, one black. An unsettling appearance, but one that Omega had grown to long for. 

Terzo reached up to take off Omega’s mask. He let him.

There was no telling who leaned in first, who initiated the kiss that followed. Only that there was one. One that both had been craving for some time. And it was unlike any they had shared before; indeed, for they had rarely kissed at all. When they did, it was rough, nasty, followed by choking or spitting or both. Never for the sake of being kissed but for the heat of dark passion. But on this concrete bench in the Ministry garden, Omega felt the gentle nature of this kiss, and it scared him. This was not how they were. This was not hatred. This was not lust.

Omega pulled away first. 

Terzo said, “Omega—”

“I want to revisit our agreement,” Omega interrupted, clearing his throat, too terrified of what Terzo would say to let him finish.

Terzo paused. “You want to fuck me again, mostriciatto?” 

Omega gripped the edge of the bench, annoyed at how he always said things like that just to make him mad. “Yes,” he replied through gritted teeth.

“Why did we stop before?”

“It…” Caught off guard, Omega failed to answer right away, his mouth agape like a fool, hesitating. “Your drinking.”

“Eh, you catch me after a party, and you think I drink too much? I do not drink today, do I?”

“You always did when we had sex.”

Now, it was Terzo’s turn to be caught off guard. He shook his head, shrugging. “Wine makes me horny.”

“If we continue doing this, I don’t want you to drink all the time. It increases the risk of getting caught,” he added quickly.

“Fine.” He held up his hands. “I will be responsible. I won’t quit cold poultry, but I will do my best. Happy?”

Being happy was a complicated feat. Omega was surprised at how happy he was at that moment, yet what lingered in the back of his mind was far from the excitement he felt now. It made him want to quell the happiness, chalk it up to being horny, and forget the ways Terzo’s smile made him feel.

Omega nodded slowly. Terzo reached up to touch his face.

“Shall we reinstate the agreement now or later?”

Omega pointedly avoided turning his head to Terzo’s touch, glaring at a dead leaf across the garden instead. “I’m busy until evening.”

Terzo tutted. He got up to stand in front of him, casually running his arms along his shoulders. He leaned over to kiss his jaw. He murmured lowly, “As I recall, you still have one more hour of practice.”

Omega wondered when Terzo found out his schedule, or when he became such a convincing man.

He tilted his head to meet Terzo’s, reuniting once more in a salacious lip lock. His arms slipped around his waist, pressing their bodies close, Terzo now standing between his legs. His hands ran along Omega’s back, lightly scratching, slipping up to tangle his fingers in Omega’s hair. Omega gripped his ass with his big hands, slipping one down his pants just to feel the flesh. Terzo released a gentle groan.

Omega suddenly lifted Terzo, then carefully set him on the concrete bench, lying down. He knelt over him, one leg on the ground to balance, kissing fiercely. Terzo held on to him, still playing with his hair and face with his fingers, splitting his legs apart greedily. Omega slid his hand down his chest, stomach, resting comfortably on the curve of his bulge. He thumbed the length of it, tight in his pants, making him moan lightly.

Then Omega heard something, which made him stop dead in his tracks. The crunch of a dead leaf. He raised his head, his eyes darting around them.

“Mostriciatto—”

Omega shushed him. He walked away from the bench, checking the path that led to the door. Not a soul in sight. The door was still ajar. Omega returned to Terzo.

“I thought I heard someone,” he said, tense.

“There is nobody around, ghoul; you worry too much.”

Omega looked at Terzo, who was disheveled and clearly begging for more. As much as he wanted to relent, to give in to his feral desire to rip into him in the garden, he was too concerned with getting caught, and the moment had passed.

“It’s too risky out here.” Omega pinched the bridge of his nose. “I don’t know why we didn’t think about this.”

“We are horny,” Terzo said helpfully.

Omega sighed. “I should get back to work.”

“You have always been a cockblock, ghoul,” Terzo mumbled bitterly, standing to readjust his pants and fix his hair.

Omega glowered at him. “You think I’m not frustrated?”

“I hope you are,” Terzo grinned. “Then you will treat me not-so-nice later tonight.”

Omega crossed his arms. “I’ll be at your quarters when I’m finished.”

“Oh, Omega, do not finish before you see me. It will not be as fun,” Terzo winked at him. He slapped Omega’s ass on his way out, causing him to jump in surprise. Omega’s eyebrows furrowed, embarrassed, angry that he was embarrassed, and glared at Terzo as he walked up the path and disappeared inside the Ministry.

[parts]: one | previous | next

buy me a kofi <3

[total-drama-brainrot]

Thinking about the fake dating AU again. 🤯

What if, during his segment on the Aftermath, Noah plays off his 'cheating' as something so emotionally detached it makes him look almost psychopathic, in an attempt to make himself as unlikable as possible?

The 'cheating' was simply strategic, is all. It wasn't his fault the two of them had to go and catch real feelings; Noah was just playing the game. Nothing more.

What? You thought he had feelings for them? Don't be ridiculous, Noah felt nothing for either of them- they were just there to carry him through the competition.

(He doesn't anticipate the ache that twists through his chest after that statement. It isn't true in the slightest, yet even just pretending to not care about his partners is physically painful.)

At first, both Geoff and Blaineley commend him for enacting some long overdue karma/vengeance on the antagonistic duo, but the more Noah intentionally digs himself into a hole- the more hateable he makes himself- the more people actually begin to pity both Heather and Alejandro. Which was the plan from the beginning, so Noah fully commits to it, playing off every interaction as just another cog in his manipulation machine; he's the 'High IQ', after all, of course he planned it all.

And he hides the nausea writhing in his gut from the blatant lies he's sprouting under a carefully blank, uncaring mask of indifference. Every claim he makes is said in the most casual tone- as if he's commenting on the weather instead of admitting to masterminding the heartbreak of two strong competitors- and that's somehow worse than if he would at least seem smug about his achievement. Because at least then he'd (appear to) care.

So, when the Aftermath finally ends, Noah becomes persona non grata. No one wants to even look at him- who knew the little snark could be so ruthless? So uncaring?

And Noah, knowing that he can't confide in Owen (who can't keep a secret to save his life) or Izzy (who's too unpredictable to trust- and who also 'leaked' fake information about him to Sierra during her time on Celebrity Manhunt, so who knows what else she's leak?) turns to his friend Eva, who promptly decks him in the face.

"I'm not friends with cheaters."

And when he tries to explain himself, clutching at his quickly bruising face and hoping that she'll see reason or at the very least afford him some decency, she throws his actions back in his face (actions have always spoken louder than words with Eva). Claiming that, if he's willing to lead on two people romantically, who's to say he isn't also faking their friendship? How can she trust anything that comes out of his slimy mouth?

It hurts. Every accusation is like a wave of searing heat against his already blistered heart, and yet Eva's eyes are so cold as she looks at Noah like he's the scum beneath her shoes.

So he flees to his hotel room.

And, for the first time in years, he weeps.

.

Given the informative finale of World Tour, the Aftermath crew were given the go-ahead to host one last hurrah, to properly question their finalists about their scheme, and to clear Noah's name.

Their audience was practically frothing at the mouth for an update.

During their interview segment, Blaineley (in an attempt to stir up some drama- she's always endeavouring to stay on brand after all) plays clips of Noah's callous 'confessions' on his Aftermath segment post-elimination, hoping to cause some trouble in paradise for the lovely throuple by sewing the seeds of doubt in their minds.

To her surprise, both Heather and Alejandro start laughing at the clips as if they're the funniest thing they've ever seen, huddling closer to Noah as they poke and tease him. Noah, in turn, sinks in unto himself, red-faced and mortified.

"What? How can you be alright with him saying that?" Cries Blaineley, scandalised that her attempt at brewing tension somehow didn't work.

"Because he does not mean it." Alejandro explains. To his side, Heather nods in agreement.

"How can you be so sure?"

Heather points to the screen, where past Noah is lying his ass off for the world to see, stoic save for the barely noticable twitching of his fingers and the occasional jump of his leg.

"He's lying through his teeth! It's so obvious- you weren't even trying to hide your tells, and after all the practice we did!"

"I didn't need to. Neither of you were there to call me out on the bluff."

[wileys-russo]

head over (tar) heels II a.russo x reader

this one goes out to my favourite era (besides boyfriend less ofc) PSA: I’ve never been to an american college :)

head over (tar) heels II a.russo x reader 4.7k words

the first interaction.

"shit." alessia mumbled to herself. anxiously chewing her bottom lip she held the campus map at eye line, tilting it to the side and squinting her eyes as if that might help her magically understand where she needed to go.

lotte and lois having a different class together had already taken off leaving alessia to stumble her way around hopelessly lost, attempting to navigate her way to geology.

the english girl was still relatively new and though given a quick tour on her first day, her american team mates seeming nice enough, she'd hardly had more than a couple rapid fire training sessions to get to know them and had no clue if they shared any classes in common.

homesickness had also meant that most of her spare time where she could have been putting more effort into getting to know them, had been instead consumed with constant phone calls back home, trying to wrap her head around the time difference and gazing longingly at photos of her friends and family. sharp pains shooting through her chest she repeatedly ticked over if such a huge decision had actually been the right one.

quickly checking the time on her phone alessia's stomach tightened into a knot, the blonde looking around in fear as more and more students disappeared into buildings and strode off confidently in all directions. alessia looked on with a sense of envy, her peers clearly knowing where they needed to go.

swallowing her panic alessia took a deep breath to re-ground before shoving the map into her bag, desperate for a solution. spotting a girl who looked potentially around her own age alessia mumbled herself some encouragement before hurrying off after the stranger. 

"uh, excuse me!" she called out, panic resurfacing when the girl either heard and ignored her, or had no clue alessia was even actually speaking to her.

then again why would she respond,  a critical element needed to signal you were actually being spoken to was someone knowing and calling out your name.

"sorry, excuse me." alessia reached the stranger, tapping her gently on the shoulder as the girl jumped in surprise, turning quickly and pulling an earphone out.

nice going less, pick someone who can't hear you and then startle her like a creep.

"yes?" you questioned raising an eyebrow expectantly, caught more off guard by the glowing blue orbs you'd now locked eyes with than the actual tap on your shoulder.

"i'm really sorry to bother you but i'm horrible with directions, would you happen to know where chapman hall is?" alessia asked nervously, the wind knocked right out of her chest at the sheer beauty of the girl standing in front of her.

your face softened at the obvious foreign accent and you nodded. "which building are you looking for?" you asked politely, pulling out your other earphone and tucking your phone away into the pocket of your hoodie. 

"uh 803 I think."

"geology with smith?" you guessed and alessias eyebrows furrowed, the taller of the two nodding in surprise. "same, we can go together." you sent the girl a dazzlingly reassuring smile, alessia's stomach doing back flips at the sight.

"god i thought i was never going to find it. thank you so much!" alessia sighed in relief, returning you a smile as the two of you set off, now in the right direction. 

(which had in fact been the opposite that alessia was originally headed)

 "so, british?" you questioned, cringing at yourself for the clearly obvious statement.

"alessia, actually." the blonde beside you joked, sending you a cheeky grin as she held out her hand, the italian unsure where her sudden boost of confidence had appeared from. "y/n, american." you shook her hand, the two of you pausing at your words before laughing, conversation flowing easily as you both made your way across campus.

"do you want me to properly show you around sometime? the place is huge but once you get settled you'll be an expert in no time!" you offered kindly, alessia having just finished telling you about what had brought her here in the first place, how attentive and interested you seemed in her words not lost on her.

"yeah actually that would be great. thanks!"

the realization.

"-and i think she's coming to the game on the weekend with her friends! though i told her she didn't have to cause its an away match and I know she has a load of assignments. but she's so smart she hardly even has to try, unlike me. i swear without her notes i'm gonna fail geology. but who even needs geology!" alessia rambled on, so focused packing her kit bag for an early training session tomorrow she missed the knowing smirk exchanged between her english team mates. 

"so less tell us exactly when are you asking her out then?" lois asked quite casually, alessia tripping and falling head first into her bag she was so caught off guard at the question, lotte shooting up to help the blonde back to her feet. 

"what?" alessia spluttered out, still in a state of shock as she peeled away the socks from her face.

"less, mate. you clearly like the girl, just ask her out!" lotte bumped her team mates shoulder supportively before sitting back down on the bed beside lois who nodded eagerly in agreement.

"i do not! we're just friends, don't make it weird." alessia mumbled, busying herself with unpacking and refolding her already neatly folded training kit.

"less, it's okay if you do like her. she's all you talk about half the time! plus the way your face lights up whenever she's around, it's a special thing to see." lotte tried again, smiling reassuringly at the younger girl who frowned sliding down onto the floor, uniform still in her hands as her head softly thumped back against her mattress of the bed behind her.

"her face lights up too! i don't think it's one sided. the two of you hang out all the time, sometimes it feels like you prefer her company over your own teammates!" lois teased with a grin, alessia's cheeks flushing a rosy pink as she shoved her uniform back into her bag, pulling her knees to her chest with a troubled sigh.

"how do you even know when you like someone...like that. not to say i do like her!" alessia was quick to correct, pointing a finger sternly toward the girls across from her who nodded. "well, when you're around her, you feel happy right?" lois started, alessia nodding, eyebrows still knitted into a frown.

"i feel like that when i see any of my friends lois." alessia answered bluntly, lois looking toward lotte to continue, the girl being the one everyone would go to for any sort of advice, wise beyond her years.

"when you guys aren't together, do you still speak? like message and stuff a lot of the time?" lotte questioned as alessia nodded in confirmation. "and when you aren't together, do you miss her? wish you were still hanging out?" alessia gave yet another nod at the question, this one a little more hesitant.

"what's something you like about her?" "well she's really really kind, and passionate, and she actually listens when someone speaks. like properly invested in the conversation, makes her easy to talk to." alessia answered honestly, eyes moving to gaze up towards the roof as she crossed her arms over her chest, legs thumping back down to the ground.

"okay, now I just want you to tell me the first thing that pops into your head yeah?" lotte encouraged softly, alessia nodding along in understanding, eyes still trained toward the roof.

"how do you feel around her? other than happy." "i don't know, sort of light headed i guess?" alessia answered with a small frown and an uncertain shrug.

"what's her favourite colour?" "green, like a forest green."

"biggest strength?" "she reads what people need really well."

"what's her major?" "social science."

"what's her first class tomorrow?" "ethics."

"first thing you notice about her?" "smile."

"thing you miss when she isn't there?" "her laugh."

"and where would you like to kiss her?" "on the lips."

a sudden somewhat suffocating silence filled the small dorm room. a beat of time passed before alessia jolted upright, eyes widening in shock as she registered how casually the last answer had slipped out, lotte sending her a knowing smile. 

"jesus christ lot if this football thing doesn't work out, you could be like a love expert or something..." lois spluttered out as she looked to the girl beside her in awe who simply shrugged.

"and that less is how you know you like someone."

the first kiss.

"-and that second goal what a rocket! poor keeper never stood a chance you just booted it!" you rambled excitedly, alessia laying down on her bed watching you reenact the goal with a soft smile, giggling as you kicked a throw pillow across the floor.

just over a month had passed now since the realization that alessia did in fact like you a lot more than she thought, and not as just a close friend. ever since then her feelings toward you seemed to grow more by the day, and in turn she began to pay closer attention to all of the small habits and traits that made you you.

like the way the corner of your eyes would crinkle when you smiled, tiny dimples appearing in each cheek. or the way you'd always put your hand over your mouth when you laughed, and need to be reminded to breathe in amongst your giggles, the tips of your ears flushing bright red.

or the way the tip of your tongue would poke through the small gap in your teeth when you concentrated, biting down on your bottom lip with a confused frown when stuck on a particularly hard question.

the way you'd frequently go on passionate tangents about all sorts of things, only stopping yourself from speaking once you realized you were on a tangent, your cheeks flushing rosy pink and a hasty apology issued shortly after, which alessia made sure to consistently promise you wasn't needed.

alessia knew your regular coffee order off by heart, often meeting you before or after class with the iced drink at the ready, stomach doing cartwheels at the way your eyes lit up every time she would.

the way you paid close attention when she explained the actual rules of football to you after the first time you came to watch one of her games, asking her all the right questions and seeming genuinely interested in her answers. your determined commitment to best understand what was her passion in life only making alessia grow more fond of you.

it spurred her on to play her best football when she knew you were in the crowd watching. which was practically every game you could, even dragging your friends to accompany you most of the time.

alessia had even picked up the habit of a regular celebration whenever she scored, something she'd never bothered with at any other time in her career, adoring how it meant she could hear your laughter ring out across the field at the goofy pose. the blonde well aware she was embarrassing herself, that came second to the sense of pride and satisfaction felt in making you smile.

by nature you'd always been quite an affectionate person around your friends, growing up in a family and a household where it lacked meant you sought physical touch amongst others. so it wasn't uncommon for your legs to be sprawled across alessia's lap, or for you to reach for her hand and mess around with her fingers during quiet lapses in conversation. 

nor was it uncommon for alessia's arm to be draped comfortably across the back of your shoulder blades, or your hands messing around with her hair as her head laid in your lap. you could easily spend hours doing and undoing tiny plaits in her long blonde locks to keep yourself occupied whilst helping the english girl study.

which unbeknownst to you, did quite the opposite as alessia's heart would hammer away in her chest at your touch. letters jumbled with one another as she attempted to read through your notes, often requesting you read them to her given that she couldn't focus on anything else but you.

but then came her lack of confidence to actually confess any of these feelings to you. the strikers painstakingly obvious swooning and doing all she could to gain your attention and affections was easily noticed by her teammates and friends, obvious to everyone it seemed but to you.

"okay my celebration did not look like that!" alessia defended herself as you broke out into a victory dance, kicking the throw pillow into alessia's closet which had become your decided temporary goal. "oh but it did, I even got it on video." you grinned, collapsing beside the older girl on her bed and pulling out your phone. clicking into the video it did indeed confirm alessia's fears, she looked like her dad when he had one too many and busted a move.

"delete that right now! there needs to be not a shred of evidence." alessia shook her head, reaching for your phone as you quickly clicked it off. "absolutely not." you grinned with a firm shake of your head.

"it's going right into my 'things to blackmail alessia with once she's a big famous soccer player' folder." you teased, the taller girl rolling her eyes.

"football." she corrected, squeezing at your cheeks as you playfully smacked away her hands. "soccer." you argued in the same mocking tone, poking at her nose. "one last chance to say it's football." alessia warned, your forehead creasing in confusion. "or wha-" you didn't even have time to finish your sentence before the question was answered for you, the english girls slender fingers digging into your side.

"lessi!" you squealed, wriggling and bucking your body trying to evade her but it was a fruitless task given the small king single bed you were both occupying. meaning very minimal space was available for you to move away from her without falling down to the floor.

"okay okay okay, football!" you all but yelled, shoving the striker away from you as you sunk into the mattress, chest heaving up and down struggling to catch your breath back. "I hate you." you wheezed out, kicking at her as your arm fell to cover your flushed face.

"no you don't, you could never." alessia teased with a grin, tugging your arm off of your face causing you to roll onto your side, the two of you now in very close proximity. seeing you so up close only made alessia's heart harder and faster in her chest, close enough for her to count the freckles that dotted across your tanned face, all thanks to the harsh carolina sun.

time seemed to slow as alessia shamelessly stared, her watchful gaze scanning across all of the tiny features which made you, well you. her eyes then met yours as if asking permission she lent in a tiny bit to test the waters, and when you didn't immediately recoil her body took over, silencing the screaming doubts and alarm bells ringing loudly in her head.

her warm lips met with yours, the kiss short but sweet as she pulled away eyes widening in shock at what she'd just done, reality had set in. but before she could utter out the apology which was stuck in her throat, you spoke first.

"finally russo, I've been waiting for you to do that." "what!"

meeting her family.

"gio promise me that you won't be a dick!" alessia sternly warned her older brother, the boy having come to visit and stay with her for a few weeks amid his travels. "less please. i'll be on my best behavior, scouts honor!" the older italian smiled charmingly, the two of them crammed into the makeshift campus bar, everyone having gathered together to watch one of the largest basketball matches of the college season against their rival school Duke.

"that's her over there." lotte interrupted, pointing you out where you sat at a table toward the back surrounded by your own group of friends, laughing at something one of them had said. "mum was right she is gorgeous. what's she dating you for?" gio teased, staring at his younger sister whose face twisted into a glare, punching his arm at the comment.

"well, best not waste time then!" gio clapped his sister on the back, grabbing a beer he was offered before striding off in your direction, alessia doing the same and hurrying after him, lotte and some of her other team mates in tow. "lessi, hi!" you cheered happily as you spotted her, grinning as you stared up towards the taller girl whose nerves melted away somewhat at the sight, noticing you were clearly already a little tipsy.

greeting your friends she exchanged hugs with some of them she knew quite well, introducing her brother as lotte pulled you aside and into a hug, making your own way around greeting alessia's friends as the two groups merged into one, everyone hollering in anticipation as the buzzer sounded and the game commenced on the tv's scattered around the room.

eventually, after you'd finished making your rounds with your girlfriends team mates you ended up in front of her brother. alessia's world then suddenly seemed to freeze, stuck temporarily in conversation with a few of her friends across the other side of the table, contemplating quite literally jumping over it to come to your aid.

but it seemed that wasn't necessary as with only a few words exchanged between you and her brother both parties laughed and gio pulled you into a friendly hug, sitting down and busying you in conversation as alessia let out a deep exhale she hadn't realized she was even holding in.

"see, worried your pretty little head off for nothing. it's fine! relax and have a drink, lets go Heels!" lotte finished with a scream, holding up her beer as everyone around her echoed the chant, raising their own drinks in cheers.

~

"i think i might have a new favourite russo now, sorry babe." you later teased the blonde, sat on her lap as the game counted down its final minutes, her arms wrapped tightly around your torso.

"well you're only human." gio winked, clinking his beer against yours as alessia gently pinched at your thigh for the comment, her jacket draped around your shoulders.

suddenly the bar exploded into an electric scream as the final buzzer sounded, signaling that UNC had won. it was the first time you'd conquered your rivals in two years you happily informed gio, who looked around in confusion as the bar suddenly emptied, everyone running out hollering and cheering in packs.

"it's a campus tradition, everyone runs onto main street and they start a bonfire!" one of alessia's team mates informed as the table all stood to their feet, alessia making sure to keep a tight hold on your hand as both of you were hustled out of the bar and into the crisp autumn air by the large horde of drunken fans.

"this is the weirdest tradition ever. all of this over a college basketball game!" gio laughed in disbelief as he filmed the chaos interrupting around you all, him and lotte running alongside you and alessia as cheers and singing broke out amongst the huge crowd of college students sprinting wildly in all directions.

"quick, let's go Heels!" lotte drunkenly shouted at the top of her lungs, yourself joining in with her as you dropped your girlfriends hand, launching yourself onto lotte as the girl sprinted off with you in a piggyback.

"be careful please!" alessia shouted after the two of you with a face splitting grin, cheeks flushed rose pink, a combination of the alcohol she'd consumed and the sudden temperature change now standing outdoors.

"i've never seen you like this." gio smiled toward his younger sister, the two of them now pushing their way through the crowd. "what do you mean?" alessia laughed, glancing over at him before standing up on tippy toes to try and spot you or lotte. 

"like this. so happy and care free, grinning like a bloody cheshire cat. we were a bit worried you'd come running right back home with all the calls after you first left, but then they stopped and now i think i can somewhat see why." gio laughed, nodding toward where the taller boy could see you and lotte, having linked up with some more of your friends just a little way deeper into the crowd.

"she's not the only reason i like it here!" alessia's cheeks deepened in color, catching onto what her brother was insinuating. "no but she contributes to it, and that's not something you've had before. it's nice!" gio smiled sincerely, alessia wrapping him into a hug. 

"but luca and I do have a bet going on how long it'll be before she realises she's out of your league and moves onto someone else. so if you could accelerate that to...before january, i'd be ten pound richer!" her brother smirked, alessia shaking her head and shoving him away playfully as he messed up her hair.

"you couldn't just let us have a lovely moment, could you?" "that's not what brother's are for, you should have learnt that by now."

pre match traditions.

"there, all done." you bent down to peck your girlfriends cheek as you finished braiding her hair. 

seeing her struggle and offering to do it once early on in your friendship had quickly turned into it being a match day tradition between the two of you, alessia quite superstitious when it came to big games.

and today, her junior championship final, was the big game.

"thank you. checklist?" the older girl sighed, pushing herself up using your knees as leverage from where she sat between your legs on the floor, grabbing her kit bag.

"socks, shin guards, boots, water bottle, finger tape, spare socks, chewing gum, deodorant, perfume, dry shampoo, back up water bottle, yellow gatorade, protein bar." you ticked off using your fingers, alessia humming in confirmation at each object as she located it, zipping her bag up and placing it back on your floor.

"what if i miss a sitter and it's my fault we lose?" the blonde collapsed onto her back on the bed beside you, burying her face in her hands. "you won't. it's okay to be nervous but with soccer you can't afford to dwell on all the what if's...a certain little birdy told me that." you gently pried the girls hands away, interlocking your fingers and pressing a gentle kiss to the pad of her thumb.

"football." alessia corrected, unable to help the smile that grew on her face at your words. "come here." the striker was quick to pull you on top of her, your legs straddling her hips as you leant your forehead against hers. "hi." you smiled sweetly, pecking her lips and attempting to sit up but a strong pair of arms wrapped around your back, pressing your body tightly against the one beneath you.

"give me a proper kiss." the older girl whined, lip jutting out into a pout as you rolled your eyes but obliged none the less, quickly pulling away as you felt her tongue slip into your mouth.

"no. you need to go soon! it's almost 3." you giggled, squeezing your girlfriends cheeks before unwrapping her arms from around you and sitting up.

"but it's a pre match tradition that you make out with me, so..." alessia grinned, hands clawing needily at her spare jersey which hung off your smaller frame, attempting to pull you back down.

"which is why we've already made out, twice now to be exact. you need to go! baby i'm not being picked on by your teammates as the reason you're late for warm ups, again." you rolled your eyes, grabbing the girls wandering hands as they slipped up the inside of your shirt, nails scratching gently against your bare skin.

"they know full well if they tried to pick on you they'd have me to deal with." alessia rolled her eyes, hands coming to rest on your bare thighs sat either side of her. "ooo so scary." you mocked with a teasing grin placing your own hands on her cheeks, thumbs softly caressing her jaw as you leant down and stole another quick kiss before rolling off of her.

"go!" you pointed sternly towards your door, alessia standing to her feet with an over dramatic groan. "fine!"

"i'll see you out there superstar." you shared a tight hug before you opened your door, the excited chatter of your peers filling the room. "i'll be the one in blue holding the trophy." alessia grinned, grabbing your waist to pull you in for one final kiss.

"now there's that russo confidence, go heels!"

her first championship.

"come on, one last push go heels!" you screamed at the top of your lungs, voice raw and practically gone after how tense the game had been, your friends echoing the same chant beside you as the whistle finally blew, the crowd erupting as your girlfriend sprinted to join the team pile on in the middle of the field. 

she did it, she'd won her first american junior college championship.

"let's fucking go number nineteen!" you screamed with pride as alessia's name was called, the girl stepping up to receive her hat and medal at the presentation. cupping your hands over your mouth and hollering proudly, alessia's brothers who sat the row in front of you joined in, her parents turning around to shoot you elated grins.

you chatted away happily with your friends about the game as you waited for alessia to have her moment with her team and the trophy, taking dozens of photos before making her way over to her family who stood to the side, tears filling their eyes as hugs and congratulations were shared.

"i think this mean's you've reached ultimate wag status now." your best friend teased, bumping her shoulder with yours as you made your way down the stadium steps and onto the pitch, rolling your eyes at the comment.

you promised to catch up with them later as your friends headed off to congratulate the rest of the team, alessia making the same promise to her family before the two of you made a beeline for one another.

"champions!" you cheered loudly as the blonde picked you up with ease, your legs wrapping around her waist as the two of you tightly clung onto one another, alessia twirling you around a couple times before placing you back on the ground.

"i'm so proud of you." you smiled sincerely, tugging her into a short but searing kiss, pulling away all too quickly for your girlfriends liking, though in such a public setting you hardly wanted her parents to see you with their daughters tongue shoved down your throat.

"you know i never thought i was into girls with backwards hats, but this is doing it for me." you nodded, gesturing playfully to the championship snap back adorning your girlfriends head. "oh really? good to know." alessia smirked pulling you in for another kiss, unable to wipe the grin off of her face at the feeling of sheer euphoria currently pumping through her veins.

her words from before had come true, here she could be seen in blue, holding the trophy. only the piece of silverware from the game sat in the hands of her coach who stood on the other side of the field. unbeknownst to you, the trophy in her hands was you, the blonde firmly determined never to let that change.

"i love you." alessia blurted out suddenly, the three words having been dancing on the tip of her tongue for a few weeks now, too scared to let them slip at the wrong time and scare you away. "i love you." you immediately echoed back with a laugh, the complete lack of doubt in your response only further fueling alessia's body with unbridled joy.

it was plain to be seen that you both had fallen sweetly, irreversibly and to some nauseatingly head over heels in love with one another.