#The Logic of All My Dreams
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i had a dream last night that i organized a tumblr meetup and we all agreed to go to a local bar together. so i go to the bar but it was a really busy night and i didn't want to ask every stranger "are u here for tumblr reasons" bc that's embarrassing and i'm shy. so i just got a drink and felt very awkward & hoped someone would approach me. tried to look inviting and like i was from tumblr but not like i was "from tumblr". when i left some girl stopped me to ask if i was there for the meetup but i was too shy and asked what's tumblr?
in the dream i went home to make a post about how nobody showed up to the tumblr meetup but my entire dash was people saying they'd gone to the bar but were too fucking shy to admit to being on tumblr so we'd all just had a drink and gone home
#i have very vivid usually very logical dreams due to my ptsd#i'm skipping the part where i was really nervous about what to wear bc i didn't want to wear the wrong thing#also the drinks were all pink & with umbrellas . also after this in the dream there was this guy#who had been there in a chicken costume and was ''funny'' but then he was always outside my window#down the street . in the store. etc.#just standing there . moving like he was drowning. he kept signing that he was choking#and i was too scared to help while his feathers .... floating and bloated in the dry air#.... while he begged me with his weird puffy wings. silently. choking and choking and choking. his toes barely touching down#and meanwhile im like sorry dude i gotta jump on tumblr to talk about this bar experience#dream me: okay the drowning on dry land chicken guy is fine. but i draw the line at social anxiety
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I'm fine. It's fine. Everything is fine.
#interrupting my irregularly scheduled 24/7 jace propaganda to bring thee#but also not#weirdly enough#i was keen on them before but—by the gods and the hells—this season!#and tis such fine feeling to have a female character on mine screen and scream my trademarked 'tis be i forsooth' i cannot even#this be i forsooth#mel medarda#the truest queen that e'er did grace our mortal screens#jayce talis#the sweetest lad that ne'er did wrong in all his days#when you bestow magic upon the cerebral iconoclast and render all her chess moves irrelevant ♡ magic simply operates beyond logic#when you bestow actualization upon the visionary iconoclast and render all his dreams corrupted ♡ reality simply taints all ideals#what fucking fine character writing in these two i am blown#i understand now. that 'roman empire' thing. tis them unfortunately#them be mine roman empire#meljay#i guess#plus i'd be positively inclined to be their third if viktor's busy#no i am not back from my unannounced hiatus#aye these tags are a mess#was there meant to be a poetic meta in the tags? nay. yet when hath such a thing ever stayed mine hand#forget janna. to none but Amanda Overton do i bow. what a goddess she be#arcane spoilers
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Kingdom Hearts Dream Drop Distance - The World That Never Was
#kingdom hearts dream drop distance#khddd#the world that never was#scenery#my gif#i really love how sora's side of this world is dark and eerie and fully leans into how dreams can distort and twist reality#the city looks mostly normal at first aside from the ghostly fog that seeps down from buildings and drifts along the floor and rises up#but as you keep going the ground beneath you is no longer a street but rather the faces of more buildings that stretch over an abyss#it's no longer the sprawling city you first arrived in but instead an uncanny one way path towards your destination#the buildings now twist and contort and are crooked and grow out of the ground in all kinds of ways that make no logical sense#it's the first time that a sleeping world looks easily distinguishable from the real world. it looks wrong. like a nightmare#meanwhile riku's half contrasts heavily by appearing to be fairly normal#the interior of the real castle never made any practical sense so nothing here feels too out of place compared to how it usually looks#it shows how much more in control riku is in comparison to how sora is losing his grip on reality as he descends further into their trap#cool stuff! love me some environmental storytelling#also i finished giffing every world in this game yippee i'm done (is covered head to toe in blood)
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Me trying to figure out how Exile fit weeks, months, or years into 11 days of December:
So it’s the month of Christmas at the start on December 4th…
but then it’s still the month of Christmas after when he’s with Techno and they visit the dsmp main area…… how does that work?…
Are we really saying that it makes more sense for Exile to be some black hole of time before Christmas in the month of December, rather than Tommy, in his mental spiral, just confusing time in Exile?… Come on now, be reasonable. You can’t tell me that this makes sense. Are we that bad at math that between December 4th and December 25th we’re gonna fit multiple months and years?! Heh?
#it does not make sense#I actually can’t find any fact to prove that time being different makes sense#I’m in genuinely trying here… walk me through the logic innitors or anyone who believes it lasted longer… because as far as I can tell there#is not evidence of long times for anything in the dsmp period. (besides limbo)#dsmp#c!tommy#dsmp exile arc#dsmpblr#dsmp meme#exile arc#c!tommyinnit#dreblr#dsmp memes#dream smp#look by all means if you can prove there is a reason it makes sense for this to be a things beyond the words or Tommy I’m all ears#and genuinely curious#this is fine#c!disc duo#I know it’s not Monday but this is rotting my brain…
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Just thinking late at night …
#limbus company#hong lu lcb#dream of red chamber#spoilers#? I guess#but do you see the vision#can you imagine#project moon#a fricking flower#no because the more time passes the more difficult it is for me to see how Hong Lu's chapter will revolve around his romantic setbacks...#because he never reacted in any way to the passionate speeches of Heathcliff and Catherine referring to his own experience#but there is no shortage of references to his family in each Canto and even in Heathcliff's one#Hong Lu reacts more to his family situation than to his love story#so everything points to the fact that Hong Lu's canto will be about family#so where does Lin Daiyu fit in all of this#parentheses: the fact that it is Hong Lu's family who finds themselves at the center of the scene seems logical#compared to the novel which even if it talks about a love story#it also and above all tells the life of an important Chinese family of the time and all its members#and enlightenment#Is Hong Lu pretending so much and hiding who he is so much#that we can't even guess that his canto will be about love?#Oh my rambling in the tags
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i’m sorry but like
they are SHARING A BED
they are ROOMMATES
they are SILLY LITTLE GUYS
they gave us this set up and for what? scotty pilgrim decides to go to all this effort to defeat this girl’s 7 evil exes and whatnot when THIS TWINK ASS MAN IS IN HIS BED
#scott where was the logic#if i had that man in my bed there would be no questions#i don’t care if she’s manicing all over your pixie till you dream girl#THERE IS A TWINK IN YOUR BED#i hate men#scott pilgrim takes off#scott pilgrim vs the world#scott pilgrim comic#scollace#wallace wells#scott pilgrim#wallace wells x scott pilgrim
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I should be working on requests rn but I had a dream where I made these last night and I think that was a request from god
#five hours of my life put into these are they look okay at best#in my defense there are no good screencaps of weevil online and i still refuse to watch the show#they specifically had a weird filter over them in the dream it was important#icons#yugioh#yugioh dm#insector haga#weevil underwood#rex raptor#dinosaur ryuzaki#rainbow#rainbowcore#shrimpshipping#probably#by the logic that all their screentime in canon is probably shrimpshipping as well
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we've had fireworks every single night this week. then it'll be halloween and then bonfire night. :/
#when are they going to finally ban them for personal use#:(#thankfully my dog is on holiday#my grandma's old dog was here on new year's eve one year and she got so scared by the fireworks she was never right after that#i still think that's what caused her to deteriorate so quickly :(#plus theyre setting them off in the field and of course leaving all the litter 👍#have i mentioned i love where i live 🥰#lol the other night i woke up to someone screaming 'he's got a knife he's got a knife' and blue flashing lights#i did dream that i got stabbed when i went back to sleep that night 😭 but honestly it wasn't a nightmare it was kind of chill#and sort of cool to see how it would feel#even though dream logic means it's totally unrealistic#anyway#that wasn't the point#my point is GET ME OUT OF HEREEEEEEEE#and ban fireworks ‼️
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Jimithon Mouthwashing is such a good representation of untreated, enabled NPD like it makes me want to squeeze the life out of him. I'm endlessly fascinated when watching him interact with his crew, surroundings, and himself because he's so fucking lost in his own sauce. It's insane. If I'm being real, it makes him my favorite character in the game.
It's a little scary to say, but watching Jimmy is like seeing a mirrored version of myself two years ago before I truly committed to treatment for my NPD. He's like a shadow. The opening line "I hope this hurts," which I believe comes from Jimmy right before the crash, is such a poignant statement. It's a simple line, but I can tell you from experience that the desire to hurt others when in a narcissistic rage is overwhelming. It's such a good line to sum up Jimmy's character in that moment. Luckily, in the real world, I had my friends and family there to catch me when I hit my lowest, even though I'd hurt them so many times. Jimmy probably could've used friends to force him into therapy (cough cough Curly cough cough)
#also I don't mean we're similar in any way when it comes to rape or SA. Please don't twist it that way at all.#I mean like in terms of the jealously resentment revenge hurting others to feel thrilled not taking responsibility not seeing flaws etc#I'm diagnosed with NPD also but pls know my experience will be different from others. We're all different people obvs.#also Jimmy has like wayyyyyyyyyy more things wrong with him not just untreated NPD lol#I would say that untreated NPD is a hell most can't describe#you barely feel anything except rage boredom and jealousy (in my case)#love is a form of ownership and control because you can't really feel it the right way#so your -person- is an object of intense obsession and also a tool for you#if that makes sense? I see that with Jimmy and Curly for sure#You want to tear others down and hurt them because it makes you feel good to put them below you#there's a constant feeling of insecurity and it drives you crazy fr#kind gestures from friends feel insulting#and oh my god achievements made by friends and family in my case feel like I've been shot like I hate when they achieve things#It's not logical obvs but that's something I instantly noticed in Jimmy so i was like .....oh brother lol#and also if they achieve something my brain needs it to somehow be tied to me or I'll make it tied to me so they can be thankful#they should always center their attention on me and if they don't I immediately resent them#these are just some of my thought processes on the matter so I can show the similarities I feel with Jimmy#the KEY DIFFERENCE is all of these thoughts I have are left in my head and not exhibited in my actions (any more. took a long time)#but he is such a nasty human with ZERO introspection that he prob never even thought about treatment#also doesn't help that the hot blonde he's friends with never did anything to help with that#idk sorry for oversharing but ahhh this game is so well written I gotta yap about it lol#also kind of a funny unrelated story to show how weird the achievement thing can be lol#my friends announced they saved up enough to go to Vietnam (their dream trip) and I was happy for them (I really was)#but of course my delusional ass immediately also took it as a threat#and I booked a month long trip to Europe a few days after so I could also announce it LMAO#that is a kind of innocent incident when compared to Jimmy but it just shows how annoying NPD can be#Jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#NPD
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Please tell me about art and media you know of that accurately captures the weirdness of dream logic and atmosphere and emotions... books and movies and video games and art and comics and YouTube stuff, whatever you want... you know, where it only makes sense on an intuitive level and falls apart when you try to explain it...
#im trying to think of examples#a great one is mullholland drive by david lynch#also actually some of david firth's (salad fingers guy's) sock series animations did that so well for me back in the day#like you know where something or someone or a place can be two things at the same time in the dream?#and how something weird and silly can have the strongest serious emotions attached to it#and how stories within stories happen#eternal sunshine of the spotless mind#was good w these vibes#silent hill 2 as well and sort of majora's mask#the book orlando#actually you know what i just rewatched a bunch of david firth's cartoons and Pulch: The Good Times is actually a better dreamlike one#than some of his dream series to me somehow#the way it has this wistful tragic nostalgic nonsense vibe that like you'd probably find deep and sad while having the dream#but upon waking it both makes no sense and seems stupid and funny instead if you were to try to explain it#also the nightmarish one about soup or wtv#when the little person gets all upset about her soup being stolen hahaha and then the creepy guy goes 'you forgot your hammer'#anywayssss#many of these things have stuck in my head since like 2007 or wtv idk theyre just fun#Sock 4: Sock Lops is good for the weird narrative jumping dream logic vibes#if you can stand to watch that much 2000s newgrounds edgy animation in this day and age...#p
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btw i will never be over how tommy kept his compass locked in his enderchest at all times, and tubbo never took his out of his offhand
#my post#listen i KNOW tommy couldnt have kept it on him often bcus dream wouldve destroyed it#but. yknow. something about tommy heart-on-his-sleeve innit keeping it locked up#and tubbo close-to-the-chest _ having his displayed where everyone could see it#like tommys very much more 'i think with my heart not my head' and tubbos more inclined towards what the 'most logical' thing to do is#but when given an item that could in all honesty represent their heart. they both carried it differently than youd expect#idk its just an interesting detail to me
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Captain Zionist & His Eugenics First Officer Star in Same Old Bioessentialism
#I can't with this fucking SHOOOOOOOOOW#just saw The Clip where they all become Vulcan and are immediately logical and immediately racist toward Spock#what are you all doing in that writers room. what do you think Spock represents??? why does it seem like snw hates aliens and hates Spock#and doesn't even know what Vulcans are??#snw feels like pro-human propaganda in a world where aliens are real rather than people dreaming up a world where aliens are real#what are you DOING why is there this grinning malice??? where's your hope and earnesty????#if you're wondering about 'captain zionist' I'm talking about the actor himself and not the character Pike but the way this show is going#I literally wouldn't be surprised my GOD#It's such a mean little show that thinks we won't notice bc it's laughing#when you watch it you just get the feeling it doesn't CARE about anything
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i have a ~dream question~
#this has been an original post#my pollies#polls#dreams#driving#i realized today that while im obvs not the driver in my dreams im also not specifically on public transit most of the time#im just. a passenger#no concept of other passengers or a driver or even what kind of vehicle it is#my dream logic is very much ''if its not relevant to the situation who cares''#also ''why generate actual human beings when you can just have the vague sense that a place is populated''#idk why im thinking abt this this morning specifically since last nights dreams didnt even involve being in a vehicle#not the ones i remember anyway#i was just thinking abt patterns in my dreams in general#cause my brain does this weird thing where in all my anxiety dreams im living in the apt i lived in through elementary + part of high school#like yes its the place ive spent the most time in but also. i havent lived there in TWELVE YEARS#and i mean i did hate that place but its not like ALL my trauma was experienced there#its just weird#dreams are weird#clouds dreams
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had a funky asgardian dream last night lol
the premise was that loki fucked around and basically an amnesiac version of loki ended up back in time with so many holes in his memory but enough knowledge to be like "odin is my dad"
and odin looked at this kid and was like "aw he looks like hela, this tracks" and, importantly, does not know that loki is a frost giant and just assumes loki is his full blood kid lol
all that to say that loki and thor grow up with big brother!loki who is actually?? a good big brother?
rather than hide hela's existence, older loki makes odin nostalgic and he ends up telling them that hela is their big sister who was "lost to the war" or some bullshit, which most people assume to mean she died in the war, right?
older loki sees like, one picture of her, notes the similarities, and then for some weird reason feels profoundly uncomfortable so he decides not to unpack all that and just avoids mention of her lol. kid thor doesn't really care that much about her bc she's not in their lives so why should he? kid loki LOVES learning about her and actively seeks info about her out, mostly because he thinks a big sister would probably be better than two older brothers (he also is young enough that lost to the war means that he could probably find her, right?)
importantly, kid!Loki grows up very differently in this dream world. instead of being the weird outcast prince, everyone looks at him and is like "awww look he's like his big brother <3." he's also like, 8 so at the moment he is very much the baby of the family
anyway so the main plot of this dream was big Loki (imagine like a 19/20 year old) plus thor (like 12) and Loki (8ish) manage to find where Hela is sealed away. idk where they are or where the king and queen are, it's implied they're not in asgard right now and this was a Very Unplanned Field Trip that is giving older Loki an ulcer. They have to look at little Loki to confirm this weird fucking ceiling portrait is Hela bc the older two are not the Hela Experts in the room
at the same time, older Loki is starting to get some flashes of the future and begins to suspect that he's from the Bad Timeline
through accident, they manage to unseal Hela, who is met with three whole younger siblings - and let me tell you it is a very different welcome when you have a very enthusiastic 8-yr-old sparkling at you and very excited to have found his lost sister and a 12-yr-old who thinks girls kind of have cooties rolling his eyes
so hela makes a split second decision to not tell her baby brothers about the whole "dad sealed me away for being warful" thing (it will be a fun surprise for odin later <3) and also embrace being a big sister (it is now her legal job to pick on older loki and make fun of thor for being the odd one out)
anyway while they're figuring this out, older Loki is continuing to get flashes of the future but is now somehow joined by thor also getting flashes of the future. what they manage to glean makes them suspicious, and hey if they're both getting future visions or whatever then logically baby loki should also be, right??
so they start to like. suspiciously spy on little loki. except idk maybe the universe decided that one loki having knowledge was fine? i don't think older loki actually fully knows about the time travel thing or that he IS little loki tbh
so anyway they're spying on an eight year old who has a strict bedtime of nine o'clock.
meanwhile hela starts getting flashes of the future and is like "wait. do i destroy asgard?? why would i do that? where would my brothers live? ):"
the only other thing i remember is there being a dramatic scene where hela is trying to reject her fate and someone tells her that she cannot escape it, and she's actually getting teary eyed because she's gotten attached to her weird shitty brothers now
then i woke up and was like "huh"
#my dreams#dream journal#big brother loki dream#i have no explanation for the fact that both lokis were just called loki in the dream#no one even batted an eye#that's dream logic for ya!#thor was also a lil different#a little shit but in the way that 12 year olds are little shits#also he kept getting called the odd one out bc of all his black haired goth siblings#i think at one point he asked if they thought he should dye his hair#little loki was very sweet honestly and really got to be a little kid without the weight of asgard hating him#older loki really absorbed a lot of that at the beginning lol and would NOT stand for anyone being mean to his little brothers#older loki and thor teaming up to be suspicious of little loki was a hilarious part of the dream#i am not kidding about the 9 o'clock bedtime which little loki adhered to religiously#little loki shoving his brothers out of the way like 'sorry losers i have a sister now <3'#hela was charmed by little loki and the other two are very fun to tease#her and older loki snipe at each other#older loki is like 'hmm for some reason i feel like releasing hela is Very Bad.'#*looks at little loki*#'ah yes my position as fav older sibling is being threatened'#hela is that one meme where she's like 'i've only had little loki for one day but if anything happened to him i'd destroy asgard'#i appreciate my brain deciding i needed a fun little sibling sitcom in my brain last night though#very fun#no clue where the loki of it came from since i haven't seen a marvel movie since uhhhhh i think the one where thanos snaps.#is that infinity wars or end game#i did watch the taika thor movie but not the second one?
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Ya know I just realized, the fact that in the staged finale c!Dream threatens to kill c!Tubbo because he doesn’t need him and plans on using the discs to control c!Tommy not his best friend c!Tubbo (despite planning to use c!Skeppy to control c!Bad) is pretty screwed up. That to everyone believing the staged finale essentially believes that to control c!Tommy, c!Dream’s best bet is two discs not the living, breathing best friend he already has captured…
#I mean that says it all doesn’t it? that the whole server including tubbo and Tommy agreed that that logic made sense essentially highlights#that the discs - two items - are more important to Tommy then his best friend…. which damn rip tubbo I guess feels bad#c!clingy duo#dsmp#sorry I wasn’t trying to talk about Tommy anymore but like… y’all gave me this brain rot okay… not my fault…#dream smp#staged finale#c!tommyinnit#c!tommy#c!tubbo#dsmpblr#lore thoughts#this is fine#once again I rest my case… still think Tommy cares about people?… I don’t think so.
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If you see me convulsing on the floor don’t worry about it I probably just accidentally redirected my brain power from movement to thinking about undead unluck
#undead unluck#all of my thoughts all day are of undead unluck#I dream about it at night too#the next logical step would be for my brain to redirect other functions for the sole purpose of thinking about undead unluck some more
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