#THE KETCHUP ONLY ONE IS THE DESSERT HOTDOG

[telomirage]

LMAO chine's go to gas station snack is the literal gas pump. of course

[hueylengyong15]

My favorite menu items that I tried from Jollibee:

Before I tried Jollibee in my country last year, I did some research about the restaurant on Wikipedia by finding out what foods they have on the menu compared to the Philippines.

Without further ado, let's get started!

Jolly Sweet Spaghetti: This is one of my go-to menu items whenever I get stressed out. When I ordered the Jolly Sweet Spaghetti from their menu, I wanted to know what it tasted like compared to Filipino traditional spaghetti.

When my food arrived, I wanted to know what this dish tasted like compared to the Filipino version of Jolly Spaghetti. This meal was topped with sweet banana ketchup, savory tomato sauce, red beef hotdogs, and cheddar cheese. As for the spaghetti, it was perfectly al-dente, and the pasta did not get soggy when it came with the set.

Overall, the Malaysian version of the sweet-style spaghetti is better than the other restaurant's version of spaghetti in the Philippines which the sauce has a not-so-sweet taste and the sausages are not as flavorful as the beef and pork-flavored sausages.

Peach Mango Pie:

One of my favorite snacks from Jollibee is this sweet hot filling of Filipino mangoes with peach slices in this deep-fried pastry which makes it a tasty treat right after a meal.

I used to dislike mangoes back in my middle school years. However, when I started to buy the dried version of mangoes, it tasted sweet and not too sour for my liking.

As I got older, I started to like mangoes and they had a gummy-like texture with sugar that had a sweet crunch.

The blended mango filling in the pie was sweet and not too sour. As for the bits of peach, it was delicious when mixed together and put in a pie. I love this hot dessert and when I go to Bukit Bintang, I would eat it again when the final exams are over.

Fiesta Floats:

Did you know that they had a different type of Fiesta Floats topped with a perfect swirl of Vanilla ice cream that encouraged buyers to try a summer treat in the Philippines back in the 2010s?

Unfortunately, you can only find these three types of floats here in Malaysia. While in the Philippines, it's popular among Filipinos who want to get a refreshing drink during the summer break.

Two months ago, after New Year's Day, I wanted to order one of the Fiesta Floats at the kiosk in Sunway Pyramid as a refreshing drink for myself due to us getting lost in the mall. But I saw that the drinks were sold out due to a shortage of ingredients.

A week later, after the tour of the B-Verse Beyond the Stars Exhibition, I went to another restaurant in Pavilion Bukit Jaili where I saw that all of the Floats were available on their menu.

I was delighted that they still serve the drink to everyone who wants to buy it. I ordered a Chocolate Float for me to try it out. However, it does not look the same as the one in the picture, but the staff members did their best to make a perfect swirl of vanilla ice cream.

The chocolate drink wasn't sweet, and I could only taste the chocolate inside the milk that had an okay taste as I drank a sip. As for the vanilla ice cream swirl, it wasn't that bad for my liking as seen in the commercial on Facebook. Next time if the drink is not sweet, I will tell the manager to add more chocolate milk for the drink.

Overall, I could suggest to the locals who want to try out these foods from this Filipino fast-food restaurant in Malaysia. As for the Philippines, it is not recommended to Muslims as some of the products are not permissible for them to eat.

If I have time, I could bring one of my friends to try this restaurant out for a treat after class to explore what fast food spaghetti tastes like compared to other kinds of pasta in restaurants.

[dr-jem-nutcase]

MvA: The M Files, take-a-peek pt. 3

For starters, thanks to all the likes, shares, & comments. I hope you've been enjoying this

Chapter 3

fake foods from Counterfeit Chemicals: a lot of fast food joints & every other generic food product in America. At least it tastes good...a lot of times. Like, Taco Bell is in no way authentic Mexican food but I LUV it 🌮

This place was Old Man Carl's in the movie and the same company that later brought BOB that ill-fated hotdog stand in San Francisco

That chart lol

Root beer flavored spinach. Sounds gross. I'd also be deathly afraid to try it. Reminds me of the late 1990s/early 2000s when Heinz made purple ketchup, which was NOT a success. But nowadays, different flavored snacks & desserts (particularly ice cream) can be hits every now and then. fake foods (or Old Man Carl's) could've been on the brink of creating a new trend! Okay, moving on

In case anyone has a hard time reading some of the text in the second panel, it says, "it doesn't taste any different from a real tomato". Sorry for the kerfuffle

Designed or created?

Btw, there IS actually a limited edition ranch flavored ice cream

Ranch-flavored tomato. Sounds great with a salad or some types of pizzas

Red 7 lol

This would be. mildly. terrifying. Wth was even in either one of those foods?

Runs away & claims BOB is homicidal. So judgmental & assuming! *fake shocked face*

How'd he grow an eye out of all this?

BOB's quite eloquent for being a "newborn"

Ooh! Monger's a sergeant now!

Eating the building isn't too different from both Blob movies but a much lighter tone than eating people alive. I never saw the newer one but I watched the OG one years ago. A guy walks into a doctor's office agonizing in pain and fear because his arm's covered in this goo that's eating up his arm and in a few minutes the guy is gone before the doctor could amputate the arm. Very G rated

Welp, so much for eating a police car (movie) or a city block (video game)

The third soldier's mouth is missing

Evidently they eat lead. Sorry, wrong story!

So BOB's eye is just part of his anatomy? Not some specially made artificial eyeball?

Like Link's chapter, this is a total jump away from the origin story in the movie. It's a good explanation for the genetically altered tomato & chemically altered dessert topping but a slightly censored telling of BOB's origin. That explosion on the two scientists was a bit satisfying. Again, kids' book *sigh*

Monger's hands are black

So...BOB named himself?

Big lips Monger isn't real. Big lips Monger can't scare you

"Lots of people don't have brains...a politician..." DW, is that supposed to be a burn? Hot dang! Let's get out some aloe vera, cold water, and maybe a trip to the burn unit at the nearest hospital

Some day, son. Some day, you will contribute to society. Just not today

I'm kinda surprised that this building hasn't toppled on top of anyone. Istg, Monger isn't afraid of anything

Now where's BOB gonna go? Also, is Link still on dry ice? Will BOB be on dry ice too? At the end of the OG Blob movie, the blob is frozen/encapsulated in ice and dropped off in the artic/antarctic. Did Monger go in this direction? Capture a monster and then freeze it like Han Solo? Hopefully that monster prison will be in the making soon. Like, REALLY soon. You can only freeze and store so many monsters! Btw, can you imagine trying to freeze the Invisible Man?

Again, this piece of work isn't mine. It all belongs to you know who. See you soon!

[wandering-aloneo-o]

think of it this way:

there are So Many Types Of Cereal

every boxed cereal ever. all the holiday variations. all the types ever. plus oatmeal counts. theres so many oatmeal possibilities in themselves. this makes hot and cold options, and so so many flavors. also this doesn't specify the type of milk! that means Dairy Free ones are okay! flavored ones are okay! (yes a Lot of cereal products have gluten, but there are also A Lot that dont and that, imo, sometimes taste better than a lot of the gluten-containing options)

this one is genuinely baffeling to me. how did so many people pick this? Why did so many people pick this??? theres only so many kinds of hotdogs (and ill count brautwursts in this too) And you have to have ketchup with them Every Time. for Every Meal. and also theyre meat (unless youre getting the plant-based ones), and at the very least people tend to start to feel Very Unwell after eatting the same processed meat stuff day after day, meal after meal.

theres only so much you can add to/do with pizza (granted it is more than Fucking Hotdogs Which Got First Place) there is dessert pizza, and veggie pizza, and tiny pizzas, and all the other fun stuff. (but as someone who is biased against pizzas because ive only had like. one kind from one brand thats actually edible. i just dont care for this one) and also think about how much effort can go into chewing pizza. okay HEAR ME OUT. it might not seem like a lot but I Swear that will add up after some point and will get tiring! especially since pizza is relatively the same texture-wise and chewable-wise. pizza also has gluten (once again this can be substituted with non-gluten bread) that, according so people i know who have tried Many different gluten free options, just doesn't work as will with gluten-free dough. (if you have any good gluten-free pizza recipies tho, im sure my step mom would be dying to hear about them if you wanna message me or send an ask :D )

anyways yeah. everyone who said cereal is right and everyone who said Fucking. Hotdogs. is criminal

[kierancampire]

Oh, health update

So today has been confusing and concerning. So when I woke up I immediately felt almost completely fine, but it is usual for me to wake up better but get worse as the day goes on, so I was thinking maybe that'd happen but I felt fine. Now, keep in mind yesterday I was running a fever, had a really bad headache, intense stomach pains and nausea so bad that I couldn't even think of food, I was lethargic, my body hurt intensely, and I had an irritated throat.

Wanna know what today's been like? Initially all I felt was my stomach (which was arguably the worst thing yesterday), but it was nothing compared to yesterday, it just felt mildly irritated and pained slightly, it was almost nothing compared to yesterday. Then towards the end half of the day my stomach feels mostly fine, but weirdly every so often it feels like someone is pinching my throat shut but it goes away instantly if I drink. I had breakfast completely fine, for lunch I had hotdogs and diced onions with ketchup, then some chocolate, for dinner I had another chicken burger and seasoned waffle fries, then for dessert I had some biscuits, 3 of which were chocolate! No issues! Ate it all like normal!

I have two theories currently. During 2022 and I believe 2021, I repeatedly kept having illnesses that were exceptionally intense and incredibly bad, but they literally only lasted 24-48 hours, then instantly disappeared. This could be that, a really intense one day illness. Or another thing I have noticed, once again, often when I have been ill I have noticed I'll have a really bad day or two, improve for a day or few, but then come crashing back down with the illness becoming really intense again for a few days, then I start healing. So it could be that too. I am hoping for a one day illness, but life has made me feel I should never expect the best, as the worst always happens, it's why I am so scared for UC in 2024, the worst always happens. But we will see tomorrow/in a few days, maybe I'm lucky for a change, I am just glad today was nothing like yesterday at least

[kirbypost-generator]

Kirby Cafe menu translation [2019]

Official site [Backup link]

This is the new menu after the cafe reopened after a shorter closing. Note that this menu shares many entries with the one from last year.

Coffee Curry and Whispy's Farm Vegetable Curry

2,480 yen

Fresh and healthy curry with richness and depth extracted from an original blend of coffee, and a base of tomato. Please enjoy the two different kinds included. ※Comes with a ceramic mascot figure of Kirby or Waddle Dee

Kirby's Inhale! Hotdog With Cheese Sauce

1,580 yen

Plenty of vegetables, and a satisfying sausage sandwiched into a genuine hotdog. As well, you can enjoy the variation of flavor in the cheese sauce. Please eat before Kirby inhales it!

Kirby's Warm Soup Pasta & Cheese Toast

1,680

Underneath his chef hat, you'll find a minestrone soup with two colors of pasta. We recommend dipping the cheese toast, the "Maximum Tomatoast", into the soup.

Chef Kawasaki’s Piping Hot Cheese Fondue Steak

1,980 yen

Please dip this piping hot hamburg steak into the simmering cheese.

Kirby Burger & Meat Pasta With Warm Vegetables

2,580 yen

Kirby burger and meat pasta topped with warm vegetables. A plate which you can eat and enjoy the balance.

※ Comes with souvenir plate (Large)

Waddle Dee Naptime Omelet Rice

1,680 yen

A peacefully sleeping Waddle Dee, lying down in just a slightly different way. In order to avoid waking it up, please eat this quietly.

Kirby's Sucking Up the Caprese

1,380 yen

Fresh tomato and mozzarella cheese, garnished with basil sauce. Please eat this before Kirby does.

Kirby Burger for Kids

980 yen

Only for children up to elementary school. A plain hamburger only topped with ketchup.

※Comes with a kid’s drink

Kirby's Fluffy Strawberry Mousse

1,480 yen

Strawberry mousse, decorated with custard cream and raspberry sauce. This is a light dessert you can lick up by yourself.

Invincible! Candy Parfait

580 yen

Break into a dash! Now you want this tasty mini-size parfair, perfect for an after-meal.

The Chocolate Fondant That Meta Knight Stealthily Takes Out of His Cape

780 yen

Warm chocolate cake oozing with melting chocolate. Please eat this while basking in Meta Knight’s warmth.

Maximum Tomato Full Recovery Plate

2,480 yen

A desert plate with all sorts of Maximum Tomato. Full charges your heart and stomach with an original Tomato Jam, and a refreshing, delicious Tomato Sherbert.

※Comes with a ceramic mascot figure of Kirby or Waddle Dee, and a souvenir plate (Small)

Chef Kawasaki's Whimsical Frying Pan Parfait

1,080 yen

Head Chef Kawasaki made this parfait in a frying pan. Eat the crepe last, enjoying it together with its texture.

Madly Loving ☆ Friend Heart Cocktail

880 yen

A nonalcoholic cocktail with a single Friend Heart, used for the luxury of making somebody fall madly in love with you. Please feel free to come back to the Kirby Cafe as many times as you want.

※ Comes with a coaster

Kirby’s Cheerful Marshmallow Au Lait (ICE/HOT)

1,180 yen

Cafe au lait garnished with a Kirby marshmallow. You can choose from two types of marshmallow. -Kirby’s Butt -Cheerful Kirby

※Comes with a coaster

Kracko’s Bubbly Soda and Finishing Blow

880 yen

Kracko's almost down! Deal the finishing blow with strawberry soda! Once you beat him, please relax and eat this.

※Comes with a coaster

Art Collection Au Lait

1,980 yen

You can now choose from 3 different flavors. Cafe Au Lait (Unsweetened) / Matcha Au Lait (Sweetened) / Strawberry Au Lait (Sweetened)

Please eat this after choosing your favorite art. You can take home an unused mug.

※Comes with a souvenir mug & coaster

[dyketectivecomics]

Little Miss Moonbeam

 Chapter 1: Hit the Pavement

(Read below or on ao3)

Summary: It was a coincidence, really. Harley and Ivy had spent the better part of their month in Vegas, laying low and enjoying newfound freedom. After being cleared for the first time in years of their criminal charges, all that they’d needed to complete their plea deals, was to stay away from Gotham for the better part of the past few months. As this temporary banishment drew to a close, Harley proposed celebrating, Vegas-style. Finding just enough pieces to pull together one of the fastest and tackiest weddings that Pam had ever seen, only one thing was missing; a flower girl. As fate would have it, Raven is tagging along on her mother's tour. And above all else, she is looking for an escape. While they hadn’t kept in contact since the incident at the Asylum a few years back, it had hardly mattered to Harley, who had greeted the girl with a warm hug and invitation to their impromptu wedding. To which Raven happily obliged, on the condition they’d let her tag along on their road trip back to Gotham. A condition that a much more sober and clearheaded Ivy was starting to severely question the motive of... ... Meanwhile, Zatanna enlists Diana's help in finding her daughter. With mixed results.

...

“I’m going to fight it.”

“You’re going to lose, babe.”

“I’m gonna destroy it.”

“It’s a whole-ass saguaro cactus, Harls. And it looks like it’s over twenty feet tall.”

“Language,” Raven quietly interrupted as Harley made a motion to roll up her nonexistent sleeves.

In a tank top and booty shorts that hugged her in all the right ways, Ivy had to admit she found the blonde’s antics mildly amusing, at the very least.

Their volkswagen’s coolant had done a piss poor job. They’d barely made it an hour out of Vegas before it began to leave a trail of smoke behind, and caused a minor panic among each of the passengers. Ivy managed to pull over, find a signal with Harley’s phone, and called for help. Now it was simply a matter of waiting for a tow from the nearest town.

She was starting to become a tad more worried about the heat getting to her wife, or to this poor kid they suddenly found themselves in charge of.

Pam quietly apologized to the girl as Harley continued putting on a show for them. Pushing her baseball cap forward like Popeye and winding up a fist as if ready to punch out all of the cacti’s lights , she made quite the fool of herself as she stubbed her toe against a barrel cactus and subsequently howled in pain. Raven let out a giggle that she immediately tried to cover with her hands, and Ivy rolled her eyes.

“That’s what you get for trying to fight nature,” she called out lazily.

She couldn’t help her smile as Harley began hopping on one foot, attempting to take out the needles and muttering at the pain. She began to hop a little too far back from that barrel cactus, however, and brushed right by another species then.

Raven started laughing outright as Harley let out another couple yelps of pain. “Call ‘em off, Red! I surrender!”

“Only if you get your ass back to this car already!”

“Language,” Raven said again, this time with a pointed glare at the former rogue.

Slowly turning to face the girl, Ivy took her time to size her up.

She leaned against the seat on her side, arm sticking to the leather due to the sweltering heat. In a purple tank top and white tennis shorts, with sneakers that looked almost too big for her feet, she seemed almost impossibly small. Pam distinctly recalled the light-up sketchers the girl had worn when they first met, and being oh-so-annoyed by how they only seemed to flash brighter with every other step. The girl had obviously matured at least a little since that time, but certainly not enough to impress this rogue.

She didn’t think kids were so much a nuisance , rather that many of them were generally loathsome compared to most adults. She would never admit to having a soft spot for them, however. It really wouldn’t do to have her reputation put on such a dangerous line.

Especially since this one was really starting to get on her nerves now.

She took off her sunglasses and placed them atop her sunhat, pleased when Raven’s own sapphire eyes lifted to meet hers at the movement.

“You and I both know your father swears enough to make a sailor blush, sunshine-”

“Don’t call me sunshine-” Raven growled, meeting her gaze, glare for glare.

“Moonbeam, then,” Ivy sneered, “And if we’re going to get along these next few days without wanting to kill one another, let’s get one thing clear-” She leaned forward, hands resting on knees in the most patronizing pose she could manage. The girl’s frown deepened in response. “Harley and I were criminals. We’re doing our best , but we’re not going to completely change over night. So just bear with us. Alright, Moonbeam?”

The girl gave a nearly imperceptible pout, and tore her gaze away, muttering something under her breath as Harley limped over to where they sat in the car.

“Those cactuses are tougher than they look.”

“Cacti,” Raven and Pam corrected at the same time. Harley only gave a small, knowing smile, before pulling up her leg and using the open door as a footrest. She made slow work of pulling out the last of the needles stuck in her skin, sucking in a sharp breath with each tug and pull.

“Um, I can help with the pain,” the girl volunteered, “If you want. It’ll help you heal faster too.”

“Aw, I ‘preciate that Ray-Ray, but y'know what they say,” she took a pause, “ Comedy is pain plus time.”

The botanist gave a groan as Harley gave a shit-eating grin.

~*~*~*~*~

The panic hadn’t set in until well after the show.

After all, she’d had an occasional argument with Raven before. She fully expected her daughter to be somewhere backstage waiting for her.

Traditionally, she would have been in the dressing room. It was the fastest way to clear the air, and the most private place to talk other than waiting until they were back at their hotel room. On occasion, Raven would sneak off to other areas. The girl had become well acquainted with more than one theater’s catwalks and costume storage.

But after exhausting every possible sulking spot, Zatanna felt something knot uncomfortably in her stomach, as if her heart had dropped out of its place.

She talked with stagehands and crew members alike, those who had witnessed them fighting earlier in the evening, and those who helped to paint a picture of where the girl had run off to.

One thing had been made almost immediately clear: Raven had left the building.

And there was no telling what kind of trouble she could find herself in.

~*~*~*~*~

“God, I love small towns,” Harley sighed after taking the biggest gulp she could manage out of her chocolate milkshake. She nudged the strawberry one further across the table to it’s intended recipient, who sat sulking in her seat. “C’mon, Ray-Ray! Nothin’ cures the grumps like a milkshake! And we ain’t leavin’ till you finish yours.”

“We’re not leaving at all until the shop clears our ride,” Ivy sighed, taking her seat beside her wife with their orders in hand. “Mechanic said it could take a few hours.”

“Shh, milkshake first, Red. Doctor’s orders!”

“Doctors don’t prescribe milkshakes,” Raven snorted, still looking pointedly out the window and away from the clown and the botanist.

“Yeah? Well these doctors do!” Harley smiled, tapping the glass with a spoon before dipping it into the treat. “Dessert first, kiddo. That’s how ya live your life right.”

“Just indulge her,” Ivy stage-whispered, “You’ll be happier for it.”

“Appreciate the… back-up,” the clown sang between bites of her burger, bits of ketchup and mustard flying onto the table.

Ivy rolled her eyes, handing a napkin over to the clown as she took a careful look around the diner.

It was nearly empty, save for the waitress behind the counter and the trucker at the far end of the bartop with his own meal nearly finished. There were a few television sets, many of them playing various sports channels. The sole set that displayed a news broadcast, however, caught her eye. The volume was too low to make out the anchor’s words, but in the news ticker was something alarming.

‘World Famous Magician’s Daughter: Still Missing. Last Seen Leaving Vegas Hotel.’

Her back straightened, but she tried to appear nonchalant as she signaled to the waitress to turn the volume up on the broadcast. She kept a careful ear out as Harley and Raven began a petty argument over the merits of chili dogs versus hotdogs, grateful that the clown seemed to be getting along well enough with the girl.

~*~*~*~*~

She breathed a little easier, when she heard Diana was available, and in the area. Well-rested after an intergalactic League mission and itching for an easy assignment, she had practically skipped into the theater to meet with the magician.

“Zatan-”

“Diana, I-” she interrupted immediately. The tone her voice took, the empathy Zatanna could feel in the amazon’s voice in so few syllables, was almost too much to bear.

“I just want my-” She choked on the word, swallowing thickly and composing herself before she turned again to face the amazon.

“Vegas PD found some witnesses. She’s hitched a ride and they’re heading east-”

“Then what are we waiting for. Fill me in as we go,” Diana smiled, “Let’s find your daughter.”

~*~*~*~*~

“Remind me again,” Pam sighed as she interrupted Harley’s radio channel surfing with a forceful press of the power button, “Why I shouldn’t simply turn this car around and give you back to your mother?”

“Because I’ll let her follow through on pressing charges for kidnapping if you do,” the eleven-year-old glared at the botanist in the mirror as she leaned forward on the front seat. Her arm couldn’t quite reach for the dials on the radio, but she hadn’t given up hope yet for taking control of the music from the rogues.

“And to think, we were gonna invite Zanna to the wedding, too.” Harley shook her head incredulously as she kicked her feet onto the dash. Pam shot her a few concerned looks before she sighed and slowly brought them back down.

“We all saw that news ticker back at the diner,” the botanist mused, gripping the wheel a bit tighter as she realized she’d unconsciously picked up speed. She slowly eased off the gas, and tried to relax her grip. They didn’t need another reason for any highway patrols to pull them over.

“It won’t be long before Zatanna sends the whole damn League after you,” she reasoned, “And after us, by default-”

She stopped herself as Harley touched her shoulder, catching her wife’s nod in the girl’s direction. Pam glanced to the rearview mirror, to see Raven had slumped into the backseat, glaring daggers out her window as her eyes misted over. Her arms were crossed over her chest, hands balled into fists and crackling with the barest hints of energy.

And that was when the former rogue felt one of her own eyes begin to mist over, and recalled the incident at the Asylum, and the unfortunate conditions under which she had first met the girl.

It was Raven’s emotions, making a wonderful mess of what should have been a happy honeymoon.

She felt Harley’s hand squeeze her shoulder, just before the clown began taking off her seatbelt. “Make room for Auntie Harley back there, Ray-Ray! It’s time for some quality therapy-time!”

“Harley!” Ivy yelled, “For God’s sake! I can pull over!”

“No time, Red! Keep yer eyes on the road!” she yelled back in reassurance as her foot bounced against the volkswagen's ceiling, and nearly hit Ivy square in the face. “Me an’ Ray will have some girl-time back here, ‘kay?”

“I don’t-” the girl took a deep breath, closing her eyes and humming something quietly before she opened them again to give the clown a stern look. “I don’t need to talk about it.”

“Pammy, darling, please make a note in the patient’s chart that she’s uncooperative and a spoil-sport,” Harley declared, a tad louder than necessary.

Biting back a smile, Ivy could only respond with a nod, “Noted.”

“Now listen, kiddo. You may not think you need to talk. That’s fine. I ain’t gonna make you talk,” she reached to place her hand atop Raven’s, pulling back when the girl shuffled further away. “But just know we’re an option, ‘kay? It’s always better to talk to someone about how ya feel. It ain’t gotta be anyone except who you decide.”

She stretched her arms slightly above her head then, as much as the car’s ceiling would allow, and laid them nonchalantly behind her head, leaning back against the door on her side and picking up her feet to lay them across the girl’s lap.

“Now if ya don’t wanna talk about… why exactly ya wanted to tag along. Then we’ll talk about what we’re gonna do when we get to New York! ‘Cause here’s what I’m thinkin’...”

They knew from experience, and from many a trusted road atlas, that a trip from Las Vegas to New York would take thirty-six hours, minimum. Mrs. Pamela Isley-Quinzel was starting to believe this particular trip would take a tad longer than that.

[corpulentcarbs]

Taiga’s eyes narrowed, her own face flushed with a hint of embarrassment. “You’re so full of it, you dumb fat ass chihuahua.” She snapped at her to mask her usual feelings, despite everything Ami knows how to ruin things by running her mouth. “You really think you’ve got me all figured out, you sound like a bigger idiot than you usually are. I do this because it’s the only way to actually get you to shut up.”

Without missing a beat, Taiga reached over grabbing a hotdog that’s slathered with both cheese, ketchup and relish. Shoving said hotdog into Ami’s mouth that she won’t close. “Why don’t you save yourself the embarrassment.” Her tone of voice even more fiery than usual. Relentless in grabbing an extra beefy burrito that was packed with beans, meat and cheese with her free hand.

“You shouldn’t flatter yourself thinking I’m jealous of you, I really wish you’d just drop it all together honestly. Because when you use your mouth for anything other than eating it really irritates me.” Taiga continued, her eyes gleaming with a mix of defiance and a hint of something she obviously won’t openly admit herself obviously.

The model’s mocking drove her more up the wall with how much more rapid her assault at feeding her was. Alternating with even more hotdogs and burritos, cramming them into her mouth up until she held one last hotdog which was the largest of all. “You think me feeding you is some kind of therapy for me? Don’t twist it any further than me just taking care of a butterball when no one else wanted to help you.”

Shoving in the last hotdog with a lot more force, practically forcing her to swallow it whole. Watching on as Ami’s gut grew tighter as she paused for a moment. “And if you’re going to keep running your mouth, you may as well do it with food in your mouth like a good chihuahua. Cause I actually like it when you’re obedient not when you want to blabber on about nonsense that you act like you’re such an expert on.” Soon she pushed the empty bags aside so she could grab the dessert.

Even if almost anything physical wouldn’t do much to Ami, the short brunette was going to make sure this damage involving her waistline was even more permanent. With the funnel being shoved into her mouth, barely giving the plus sized model a chance to even talk back or speak ill of her. Not hearing more of her none sense helped Taiga calm down just a bit.

“I-It’s… about time you finally shut up…”

Her face was still a bit red from getting her hand and fingers licked, that embarrassment wasn’t something she could handle at first. Two liters turned to four then that four turned to eight, leaning in each and every time to make sure they not a drop was spilled out dribbled. Watching on as Ami’s gut grow more tighter and more taut due to the pressure of the mix. As she set down the jub what popped out of the bluenette’s mouth was the tube that Taiga finally piled out after a half hour.

“Always acting so high… and mighty but as usual you helplessly… guzzle and consume as if it’s your last meal… even eating when you’ve clearly had enough. You always call yourself a model but I see… nothing but a pig…”

Despite her usual pridefulness, there was obviously a hint of embarrassment still lingering about Taiga’s composure. Not really caring how full or not the model is, she took this chance to slap her grossly enlarged and gurgling gut.

[surveysonfleek]

1493.

Breakfast! 1.) Have you ever eaten a “balanced breakfast” like they show in cereal commercials (I.E., bowl of cereal, fruit, glass of orange juice)? i probably have. i just hardly ever do.

2.) When’s the last time you made someone breakfast? my mum made breakfast this morning.

3.) What’s your favorite cereal? froot loops!

4.) What’s the highest calorie, most terrible for you breakfast you’ve ever had? a big breakfast. like bacon, eggs, pancakes etc.

5.) Would you rather get breakfast from McDonald’s or Burger King? mcdonalds of course.

6.) Waffles or pancakes? i feel like i’ll be less disappointed with choosing pancakes. as much as i love waffles, i’ve had really gross ones in the past. like not fresh, hard etc.

7.) Eggs or cereal? eggs.

8.) Milk or orange juice? oj.

9.) PopTart or Toaster Strudel? never tried toaster strudel. i do like poptarts but they’re a little too sweet.

10.) Do you even eat breakfast? like 10% of the time. 

11.) Do you take vitamins with your breakfast? no.

Lunch! 1.) When do you usually eat lunch? 1ish.

2.) Did you get notes from your parents in your lunch when you were little? no lol.

3.) If you had one, what did your lunch box look like? i had plenty throughout my school life.

4.) What’d you have for lunch today? a costco hotdog.

5.) Do you like to go out for lunch? Where? i don’t have much time to go out for lunch but i do love going to thai or chinese and having their lunch specials.

6.) Do you have/want any cute sandwich cutters? (They decrust your sandwich into a shape) no.

7.) Do you sit with/meet with anyone for lunch often? not really.

8.) Have you ever had a peanut butter and butter sandwich, or does it sound appealing at all? i have. i’m not really a fan of it.

9.) Is your lunch usually a hot food or a cold food? last week i had salad everyday. so cold lol.

10.) Has the word “lunch” been repeated so many times it’s a meaningless word by now? no.

Dinner/Supper! 1.) Do you follow the health rule of having a small dinner and big breakfast? quite the opposite lol.

2.) Do you ever say a prayer before eating dinner? no.

3.) What’s your favorite take out dinner, if you have one? chinese!!

4.) Have you ever been taken out to a nice restaurant for a dinner date? yes.

5.) Did you grow up eating dinner with your family? How do you think that affected you? yes. it lasted until i was in uni and not everyone would be home for dinner etc.

6.) Do you have “nice” dinner plates for special occasions? no.

7.) Do you ever eat frozen dinners? rarely. i hate them.

8.) What dinner foods can you cook? lol. not that much.

9.) White or red meat (or their vegetarian substitute counterparts)? i like a bit of both.

10.) Soup or salad? salad.

Dessert! 1.) Do you ever get dessert at a restaurant when they ask? hardly ever. i’m always too full to make it to dessert.

2.) Is there a dessert food most people like that you hate? cheesecake.

3.) Cupcakes or real cake? cake!

4.) Ice cream or pie? pie.

5.) What kind of birthday cake (or other sweet birthday type thing) do you usually get? a mudcake of some sort.

6.) What was your favorite childhood birthday cake? ube cake.

7.) Do you have a favorite foreign (to a Westerner, anyway :P) desserts? (Baklava, biscotti, churros…) yes. churros, baklava, cannolis, buko pandan, leche flan etc etc!

8.) Do you bake sweets? Which are you best at? yes. brownies.

9.) Have you ever had a good “diet” dessert, like something endorsed by Weight Watchers? What was it? not really. i know how to make gluten free brownies but they’re not healthy whatsoever.

10.) What’s your dream dessert? fresh waffles with nutella and bananas.

11.) Do you watch shows like Cake Boss or Cupcake Wars? no.

Snacks! 1.) What’s the best candy in the world? do chocolates count? kit kats!

2.) Do you eat more snacks or full meals? full meals.

3.) Is there anything you find yourself eating when you’re bored? leftovers.

4.) Do drinks with calories count as a snack? haha yes. they actually can make me feel full.

5.) What’s your favorite food that’s usually served at parties? cob loaf!

6.) Do you eat in class? If so, what is it, usually? -

7.) Honestly, are your snacks healthy or bad for you? it depends what you eat obviously.

8.) Potato chips or trail mix? neither.

9.) What do you usually get at the movie theater? i usually have dinner before going.

10.) Did you get fruit snacks with your favorite character on them when you were little? no.

11.) Do you remember any sayings from conversation hearts? Which is your favorite? u r mine. loool.

Food in general! 1.) Do you buy generic brand food? only if i’m baking or cooking something for the first time.

2.) Is there a common food you find repulsive? olives.

3.) What’s your favorite “ethnic” cuisine? japanese.

4.) If you were stranded in a zombie apocalypse with only a full, run-of-the-mill and full-of-junk vending machine for food, which items would you eat first? chocolate.

5.) Are you a candy fanatic? no.

6.) Do you like any weird food combinations? nah.

7.) Are there any foods you shouldn’t eat because of your religion? no.

8.) Would you eat a bug if it was covered in your favorite food? no lol. only for money.

9.) Do you think being a vegan would be/is really hard? if you had a good knowledge of food and knew how to cook it wouldn’t be too hard. 

10.) Do you eat in the car? yes.

11.) Do you pay attention to serving sizes? hardly lol. only when i read calories.

12.) Fruit or vegetables? veggies.

13.) Mustard or ketchup? bbq sauce lol.

14.) Does mayonnaise disgust you? not really.

15.) What’s your favorite holiday, in terms of the food you get to eat during it? xmas duh.

16.) Are you hungry? (: What do you plan on eating next? nope. water.

[puzzled-zebra]

I really like the “Aliens eat weird Earth food combinations” trope and I hope that Voltron does that. Say for example...

Allura, with all the daintiness and sophistication of an Altean royal, dipping fries into a milkshake while Lance just stares at her like she’s the most beautiful creature in the universe.

Actually, just crank Allura’s thing for milkshakes to 11 please.

“Oh stars, Lance! This ‘pizza’ is absolutely scrumptious!”

“Heh, had a feeling you’d dig the ham & pineapple.”

“You know what? I just came up with the best idea! Lance, we should make a pizza milkshake!”

“......B-brilliant idea Allura. I, honestly, would have never thought of that...”

Allura acquires Lance’s love for Italian food in the strangest of ways.

Lance doesn’t know how she can happily dip pickles in marinara sauce, but he’s glad that she is smiling.

Ah, yes, fettuccine with salad dressing. Makes perfect sense.

Romelle would just be Buddy from Elf.

Romelle...why are you?...You don’t...you don’t put honey on hotdogs...

Remember that spaghetti monstrosity that Buddy made? Add strawberry jam to that, and you’ve got Romelle’s Special Dessert Pasta.

No, milk duds and ice cream do not make for a well balanced breakfast, hun.

She really likes sweet condiments.

Jelly or jam on any and all sandwiches. Yes, especially burgers.

I’ve heard of people adding ketchup to eggs, but never chocolate sauce.

“What do you mean ‘Maple syrup isn’t a beverage’? It’s a drinkable, sweet liquid in a bottle! How is this different than one of your ‘sodas’?

Speaking of sodas she’d probably chug a liter bottle and belch like Buddy too.

She won the contest that the boys were having, as well as won their respect and friendship, and was titled the Queen of Soda Drinking.

She probably thinks it’s an Earth sport.

Everyone is concerned that she’ll get diabetes within a month of being on Earth. Please stop this beautiful sunshine child.

In this trope Coran would just be Coran!

He’d experiment with all sorts of things to recreate the taste of Altean dishes.

Hunk was horrified watching Allura’s strange combinations, but Coran really takes the cake...and cuts it in half to use it as bread for a tuna sandwich with extra mayo.

Please...stop...no one wants to witness you mix marshmallow fluff and relish to make a “new and improved” sweet potato salad “This time with pineapple!”.

The only “normal” strange combination that he is addicted to is cantaloupe with pepper.

He sometimes eats things that aren’t technically food...or even edible by anyone’s standards.

Yes, he has accidentally consumed dish soap. It wasn’t that bad, it could just use some salt!

Stop eating the chapstick Coran, it isn’t candy. Neither is the lip gloss.

Look, I KNOW it says it says 100% natural, and that the first three ingredients are mango, algae, and grapefruit extract, but that is a skin care creme, and NOT something you should be spreading on a bagel.

He also delights in the finer beverages on Earth like wine...Rice wine.

He’s also crazy about condiments and pineapples in general.

No, he isn’t eating a plate of 7 different sauces, that was a steak. A steak he COVERED in 7 different sauces like a heathen.

YOU DON���T PUT SPICY MUSTARD ON POPCORN THAT’S FOR THE HOT DOGS!

Pineapples for breakfast, pineapples for brunch, pineapples served in any way to compliment his lunch.

He also likes pineapple on his pizza...which has been drizzled in several different sauces, and then coated entirely with ranch dressing.

Keith and Krolia have the same weird as hell tastes.

Neither of them care if they are in a town with a Walmart or 7/11, it’s huntin’ time!

Fresh roadkill? Heck yeah, free lunch!

Beef jerky is great and all, but have y’all ever had rabbit jerky? OOH or snake jerky!

A well-marinated and carefully cooked heart, can be just as good as any steak.

Scorpions can be plenty tasty if you season them just right! And crickets are basically like eating sunflower seeds only free and with more protein.

Galrans. Freaking. Love. Ketchup.

Krolia put her lover in the awkward position of buying 3-5 bottles of ketchup per week. The grocery staff spent countless hours wondering what he used all of it for.

They would add ketchup to everything if they could.

Keith: *drenches pancakes in ketchup!”

Lance: “KEITH! THAT ISN’T MAPLE SYRUP!”

Keith: “I know.”

Lance: “Wh-why are you putting ketchup on pancakes?! That’s disgusting!

Keith: “No it’s not! That guy over there is doing it too!”

Lance: “Keith, that guy is putting it on his omelette.”

Keith: “Meh, same difference.”

Lance: “THERE IS A DIFFERENCE!”

They put as much ketchup as possible on both burger buns, and then DIP THE BURGER IN ADDITIONAL KETCHUP FOR EACH BITE.

No writing cute messages or drawing pictures on their omelettes, they will just COAT the omelette in ketchup.

Poor Shiro learned this the hard way. KEITH WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DRENCH HIS CAREFULLY DRAWN KETCHUP ART? THAT’S THE ONLY PART OF THE OMELETTE MAKING PROCESS THAT HE GOT TO PARTICIPATE IN! SURE IT LOOKS LIKE A 5-YEAR-OLD DREW IT BUT STILL! So unintentionally heartless...( ;^; )

Keith first had ketchup when Krolia let him slobber on her ketchup covered fingers after she had some fries.

This discovery helped her encourage him to bottle feed by dipping the nipple in ketchup.

Krolia’s lover was SO concerned about her sodium levels when they were together. Many years later, Shiro is experiencing that same concern with her son.

“Marinara sauce is like ketchup...but fancier.”- Krolia or Keith at some point in their lives.

Yes, in case you are all wondering, Lotor would love ketchup too.

And all of his former generals as well.

[frozenlakebeast]

From a game on discord

Text: want to go to a food truck festival tonight?  It's on 6th St by the apts

Text-reply: sure

-

There were  trucks everywhere, with all types of food. In the center were a few picnic benches,  so festival-goers could sit while they ate. A stage with a local band stood at the back of the plaza. Jamie found seating while Mako got food.

Jaime waited and looked at all the food choices. It all looked good! When Mako came to the table, Jamie watched him eat for a bit before piping up with, “I bet I could eat from everything here.”

“You can't.”

“Watch me!”

Mako just grunted.

Jamie pushed himself up. “I’m gonna do it. Save my spot.”

He walked over to the first truck, named “Doggie Style”. He laughed at the name before ordering two hot dogs with “the works”. Next door had tacos and burritos, so he got two of each - two different styles, whatever the cooks felt like doing. He couldn't carry more but still had a few more trucks to visit, so he went back to the table to drop off what he had.

“You’re going to eat all that?” Mako asked when he saw the spread.

“Nope,” Jamie grinned, “I’m gonna eat more. Don't touch.”

As he turned away, Jamie saw Mako’s eyeroll and giggled to himself. This was going to be so good.

Two trips later, he plopped down at the table and looked at his feast. He had two hotdogs, three beers, two  burritos, two tacos, two burgers, two fries (in the only size they came in: large, with lots of ketchup on the side), two loaded baked potatoes, two ice creams (one vanilla and one chocolate, both soft serve), and one very large slice of pizza, loaded up with extra cheese, pepperoni, and bacon.

He inhaled one of the hotdogs, then a taco. He mixed the ice cream and fries, enjoying the salty and sweet flavor. The ice cream alone would've made a great dessert, but it was hot and they were melting.  The second hotdog went next, then a burger, and he was full. Mako huffed a smile and stole some fries.

“Finished?” He asked.

“Not a fuckin’ chance!” Jamie swatted Mako’s hand, back at the fries. “Those are mine, and I'm gonna eat them. You want some, go get your own.”

Mako shrugged and withdrew his hand, settling back to watch the show. Jamie took a breath and surveyed what was left. He could do this.

He took it easy for a minute, eating fries and sipping beer while deciding what to eat next. He felt pretty full, but not uncomfortable. He looked at the remaining burger. It was already pretty packed, but what if…? He took the top bun off and shoved the rest of the fries inside while Mako looked on with something akin to disgust. He took a bite and grinned. “Jealous?” He asked, mouth full.

“Ugh,” Mako scoffed, “Disgusting. Making me hungry, though.”

“So go get something!” Jamie gestured wildly to the trucks surrounding them. “I already told you, this is mine.”

Another eyeroll and Mako heaved himself up to somewhere. Jamie didn’t look. He started the pizza.

He…was full now. Uncomfortably so, and his shorts were digging into his stomach. He unbuttoned them and it felt a little better, so he drank another beer. They were the swanky craft beers that came out once a year for three days and cost more than an entire meal. It was pretty good. He rubbed his stomach and ate the other taco, then a potato.

Mako came back carrying another full tray of whatever. Jamie didn’t feel like looking at more food and didn’t care what he brought back.

“You okay?” He was asked. He nodded, sort of, but jerky movements were not going to happen. He started on the next potato, but could feel himself sweating.

“Here.” Mako put the tray down, and shifted Jamie so he was sort of laying across the seat of the bench, sort of leaning against Mako.

He let it happen. He wasn’t that bad off that he couldn’t stay sitting, but if Mako wanted to baby him he wouldn’t fight it.

“You did it wrong,” he said, grabbing what was left of the food. “You have to pace yourself.”

Jamie tried to say something but burped instead.

Mako laughed and rubbed his stomach. “Here,” he said again. He fed the rest of the juicy baked potato to Jamie with one hand, using the other to rub his stomach. They continued that way with the burritos. Jamie watched as his stomach expanded, but Mako’s giant warm hand felt good. It felt really good, and he started drifting off.

“Hey, you’re not done yet.” He felt something cold press against his face. “One more.”

He opened his eyes. Ugh. He sighed and pushed against Mako to drink it himself. Mako let him, still rubbing his stomach. Once he finished, he burped again which made him feel a little better, but not much. Mako let Jamie lean on him as he ate his own meal. In his half-drunk, very full state he felt sort of woozy, and mumbled nonsense.

“I ate it all,” Jamie told Mako’s shoulder, “Jus’ like I said I would. You proud of me?”

“Sure,” Mako said.

“Good.”

[onewfantaesy]

hello! for daycare au, maybe smth like taemin having brat phase and he stole/broke smth and tells boa and yunho that's heechul???

When Taemin walked into the kitchen to see Boa frosting what looked like the biggest chocolate cake his five-year-old eyes had ever seen, Taemin knew he had to have some. He had to eat it right this very second or so help him he would perish right then and there, so he ran up to the counter to sit on one of the stools and stare with huge, wide eyes at the cake in front for him.

“Mama, can I have some?” he asked, reaching his finger out to dip it in the frosting.

“No,” Boa said, tapping Taemin’s hand away. “This is for after dinner. Why don’t you go play in the living room while Pob and Daddies finish making dinner?”

“But that’s so far away,” Taemin whined, slouching in his seat and pouting at Boa. “I want cake now.”

“With an attitude like that, you won’t be getting any cake,” Boa warned him. “Now go play somewhere. Dinner will be ready in an hour or so.”

Taemin huffed and whined, but he slid from the stool and went stomping into the living room to play with the toys he brought over from home. Changmin wasn’t there that day, he went to go spend the night at a friend’s house, and Heechul was busy up in his room doing “Big kid things, Taemin, so go away,” before he shut the door.

Taemin heard Boa go out in the backyard to talk with Key, Minho, and Yunho while they grilled hotdogs and hamburgers and whatever else they were making that night. He tried really really hard to not think about the cake - he really did - but he could taste the chocolate frosting on his tongue and he just had to go have a taste. Just a little one. Just a finger-full.

When he went back into the kitchen, no one was in sight. The cake wasn’t on the counter anymore, but when he looked in the fridge, it was sitting on the bottom shelf in all it’s glory, just asking for Taemin to stick his finger in it and take a goopy glob of frosting to put in his mouth.

And he really only meant to take a little, just one little taste to hold him over until after dinner, but then one taste turned into two, and then two turned into him digging his whole hand in the bottom to pull out a chunk of cake.

It wasn’t until there was a gaping hole at the bottom of it that he’d realized what he’d done, and he panicked and turned the plate around so the missing chunk wasn’t facing the front and he closed the fridge and ran into the bathroom to wash the evidence from his hands. 

His face was clean of any frosting, and there was no trace of chocolate under his fingernails. 

Taemin didn’t know what to do. Maybe if he just pretended everything was normal, no one would know. That was it, he just had to act normal. 

So he went out into the backyard to bug his daddies and his mom and pob, and it ended with him being held at Key’s hip watching the meat sizzle on the barbecue. 

“Are you gonna want a hotdog or a hamburger?” Key asked, rubbing a hand up and down Taemin’s back.

“Both,” Taemin said.

“Both?” Key laughed, and so did the other three. “You really think you can eat both?”

“Yes,” Taemin said. “Can I have cheese on my burger?”

“Course you can,” Yunho said.

Taemin ended up nuzzling his head into Key’s shoulder and pouting into Key’s neck.

“Hey, what’s the matter?” Minho asked, going over to rub the back of Taemin’s head.

“My tummy feels funny,” Taemin whined, and he tightened his grip around Key’s neck.

“You’re probably just hungry,” Key said. “Dinner’s almost ready.”

By the time dinner was over, Taemin had eaten half of his ketchup-smothered hotdog and half of his cheeseburger. Minho was sitting next to him laughing at the way Taemin mangled whatever food he didn’t eat, and Key was on the other side of him saying that he shouldn’t be wasting food like that. Taemin just pushed his plate over to Minho and told him he could eat the rest, and Minho did eat some of it, but he left the hotdog alone. Too much ketchup, he said.

When the table was cleared and Boa was getting the cake out of the fridge, she let out an annoyed sounding breath and brought the cake out to the table, showing off the bit that was missing from the bottom.

“Taemin,” she started, looking at him, “did you eat some when I told you to wait until after dinner?”

“No,” Taemin whined, and his eyes narrowed and his lips went up into a little pout.

“He was out with us the whole time,” Minho said, putting his arm around Taemin’s shoulders. “When would he have eaten your cake?”

“Heechul,” Boa accused next, and Heechul looked both confused and pissed off. “I can’t believe you, how old are you that you can’t wait until after dinner to have dessert?”

“I didn’t eat it!” Heechul claimed.

“Well if it wasn’t any of us, then who else would it be?” Boa asked.

“Are you serious?” Heechul complained. “I didn’t eat it!”

Taemin only sank into his seat, and he looked between Boa and Heechul while they went back and forth over whether or not he ate the missing chunk of cake.

“Well you’re not getting any now,” Boa said. “You can just go back to your room.”

“But I didn’t eat it!” Heechul shouted. “This is such bullshit!”

Heechul ended up stomping up the stairs, and they all heard his bedroom door slam shut.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Minho whispered, and Taemin flinched. “No one’s mad at you, don’t look so scared.”

“Oh, baby, I’m sorry,” Boa cooed, and she went around the table to hug Taemin and kiss his cheek. “You’ll get an extra big piece since you were so good and waited until after dinner, okay?”

“Okay,” Taemin mumbled.

When Taemin didn’t finish all his cake, they all just laughed. He had the habit of only eating half his food lately, and they thought he was just being picky again. But Taemin ended up curled up on Key’s lap and staying there until it was time to go home.

“My tummy still feels funny,” Taemin said when Key carried him out to the car.

Key looked worried, and he put his hand to Taemin’s forehead once he got him in the car.

“Maybe you’re getting sick,” Key said. “Minho, come feel his head, does it feel hot?”

Minho came over, and his palm replaced Key’s on Taemin’s forehead.

“Maybe a little bit,” Minho said. “We’ll see if you still have an upset tummy tomorrow, okay?”

“Kay,” Taemin mumbled.

The next day, Taemin still had an upset tummy, and it only got worse as the day went on. He couldn’t stop thinking about the cake, and how Heechul got in trouble for it instead of him, and he eventually found himself crying in the middle off the living room to Key about how, “I ate Mama’s cake!”

Key was confused, and he knelt down next to Taemin, and held onto his arms and asked, “Did Mama’s cake make your tummy hurt more?”

“No,” Taemin cried, hiccuping and wiping at his face with one hand while the other gripped onto Nana. “I ate it and then let Mama get mad at Heechul.”

“Oh, baby-”

“I didn’t mean to eat it!” Taemin said. “I just - I only wanted a little - and then I just tasted a teeny bit of the frosting and then - and then my hand was in it and I ate a whole lot of it and I didn’t mean to!”

Key sighed, and he held Taemin close while he cried and rubbed his back and said that it was alright, it was better that he told the truth now.

They ended up going back to Boa and Yunho’s house almost right away, and Taemin was still crying and holding onto Nana while he told Boa about how he was the one who ate the piece off cake, not Heechul, and he was sorry and he didn’t mean to and it was an accident.

Boa held Taemin on her lap and rubbed his back until he calmed down and stopped crying. He had apologized to Heechul too after Yunho called him downstairs, and he was scared and worried that his big brother was going to hate him and never want to talk to him again.

“Yeah, whatever,” Heechul said, not really caring. “Do it again though and I’ll flush your trains down the toilet or something.”

“But why didn’t you just say it was you yesterday?” Boa asked, her hand still rubbing up and down Taemin’s back.

“Because I was scared you would hate me,” Taemin cried, and he tried to hide his face in her shoulder until she held his face out so he would look at her.

“Baby, I’m not going to hate you for eating a piece of cake,” she said, a smile on her face. “But I am disappointed that you didn’t tell me, and that you lied about it and let your brother get in trouble instead.”

“I’m sorry,” Taemin cried, his mouth taking in a shuddering breath.

“I know,” Boa said. “And it’s alright. But Daddy,” she said, looking at Key, “what’s do you think should happen now that Taemin’s told the truth?”

Key wasn’t the best with discipline, that was a well-known fact throughout the entire family, and he looked uncomfortable as he sat Taemin down on the couch between himself and Boa.

“Well,” Key said, clearing his throat. “Taemin, I don’t think you’re going to be getting any dessert for the rest of the week.”

Taemin sucked in a quick breath, because that really was a horrible punishment for Key to dish out.

“And that’s for eating the cake, isn’t it?” Boa asked, giving Key a pointed look.

“Yes,” Key said, nodding. “Because you ate cake before dinner even though Mama told you not to.”

“And what about the lying, Daddy?” Boa suggested. “Don’t you think he should get in trouble for that as well?”

“Daddy,” Taemin whined, holding on tight to Nana.

“Taemin,” Key said right back, and he looked sterner than he ever had before. “You’re going to go to bed early this week. You’re going to be in bed by seven-thirty. Every night.”

Taemin was pouting and sniffling and was very upset, because Key had never punished him so much before. Boa was the strict one, Taemin knew that, but Key was getting stricter now that Taemin was getting older, and Taemin didn’t like it one bit.

Taemin thought maybe Key would let up on the punishment, would let him have a pudding cup or go to bed at eight like normal, but Key was very stern about Taemin’s punishment. All week Taemin had no dessert after dinner, and he was in bed at seven-thirty on the dot. It was awful, and Taemin hated it, but so did Key. Even Minho didn’t like that Taemin was in trouble, and it threw the entire family into a funk that whole week.

But the next Sunday, Key had cookies and ice cream for Taemin to have for dessert, and the three of them all watched a movie on the couch until eight o’clock, and they were all very happy now that Taemin wasn’t in trouble anymore.

[antarestyl]

you would write a fic with more sansbyyy (obviously not in tbs),😂I know you have a fic but mah heart needs more

Well, have a small fic then. Dunno just yet how far I will go with this. I would think at least 1-2 more chapters the least, but this might develop into more like the UF!Sansby one. ;)

This will be like 90% fluff for everybody who needs this right now.

Something old, something new…    

AO3 link

Summery: Many things changed with coming to the surface. Grillby and Sans’s relationship might be one of these things.

Living on the surface came with a lots of plus points.

For one point, it was the SURFACE. There was a sky and the sun and the STARS in the night. It was a beautiful place, full of plants and animals and all kinds of human stuff. It was new and interesting and ever changing.

There was weather.

Humans were a bit confused when monster showed a pretty strange but enthusiastic joy whenever the weather changed. Be it sunny or cloudy, rain or snow, heat or mild temperatures, it would put monster in good moods.

Another strange but good thing was that apparently gold was pretty valuable to humans. So what was a meager savings for hard times before, was now a wealth great enough to live comfortably on for quite a while.

Grillby never hurt for money, his sold from his soldier-days was barely touched over all the time, but he enjoyed working in his bar. And now he could built his bar all new and just like he wanted. Also now he could hire some more employees so he had even more flexibility and could even take some days off work.

The problem was, that he didn’t really know what to do with himself once he had a day off.

While his new bar was constructed, he already took the time to travel a bit, visiting a near-by dessert and checked out all sorts of tourist attractions that could be found around his living space. He had been thinking about visiting other countries too but found himself a bit to nervous flying on airplanes over big bodies of water to really consider this.

So there he was, having one of his free days… and being pretty bored.

His apartment was pretty bare. There really wasn’t much he did in here usually besides sleeping and resting after work so he didn’t bother with personalizing it. There were a few photographs on the walls but nothing much else. It felt… empty. Lonely.

He did still have his niece but she had moved a bit out of town with Grillby’s sister and her girlfriend, so he talked mostly via texts with her. But now it was a weekday so she would be in school most likely.

Most of Grillby’s friends were regulars from his bar and friends was… a bit big of an word for that. He knew them and cared about them but he wasn’t really close with them.

Grillby’s flames flickered a bit lower when he finally concluded that he was just very very lonely.

He kind of missed Snowdin now. Long days at the bar, which was always filled with familiar faces. And of course, Sans, who came each and every day.

Sans had been a stable for some years for Grillby, a small skeleton monster with a way with puns and who never failed to make Grillby laugh. They had struck up an easy friendship, Sans being there to cheer Grillby up and Grillby being there to listen to Sans and help him if needed. The tap was a long-standing joke between them. Sans payed what he owned Grillby without a fail and Grillby would sometimes give Sans food for free, especially when he saw the small skeleton struggle with life in general.

Sans wouldn’t always tell him everything that was wrong but Grillby had the feeling that Sans told him more about the things going on in his life than to anybody else. Grillby in turn had the feeling he could trust Sans with everything in his life in turn.

They knew a lot of things of each other. Grillby knew about Sans struggling with money sometimes. He knew Sans lost his parents at a young age and that Papyrus doesn’t remember either of them. He knew Sans liked ketchup because the texture was nice to him and he hated raw carrots. He knew Sans was afraid of heights. He knew how much Sans loved his brother and that he loved the stars and longed to see them for real. He knew Sans used to be a scientist but that something happened and he is not one anymore. He knew Sans had a friend he had never seen face-to-face, a voice behind a door that shared puns and knock-knock-jokes with him.

He knew a ton more and Grillby had always felt kinda honored to know this much about Sans. It felt nice. When he called Sans his dear friend in public the eyes of the little skeleton had lit up brightly and Grillby had felt a flutter of warmness at the sight.

It all changed on the surface.

Sans now was heavily involved in politics, even if only behind the scenes. He took care of Frisk whenever Queen Toriel or King Asgore couldn’t, he was behind the scenes when his brother was speaking the to the humans. He sat together with the royal scientist Alphys at the tables as an representative of the science division of monster kin and he still acted like the judge whenever Asgore needed him to be. Grillby had heard that Sans had bought a house and a telescope, a real one, and had a year-pass for the observatory. He heard talk that the little skeleton could become a real scientist again, working on big projects about space and stars.

He didn’t heard any of this from Sans himself and hadn’t seen his dear friend in weeks. To be honest, it hurt more than he would have thought.

Grillby was old and had lived through a lot of years. He had seen monster come and go, whole lines of families in Snowdin went by in a blink of an eye. Sure, each death of somebody he knew hurt but nothing hurt so much than the notion that he had lost the one that was his closest friend for such a long time to the wonders of the surface.

A part of Grillby longed to be back in Snowdin.

He signed deeply, banishing the thoughts. No, that was not fair. None of this was fair.

He decided to spend the day outside, leaving his empty and cold department to go to a near-by park. Maybe that would banish his dark thoughts.

The weather was nice. Pretty nice in fact. The sun was shining, birds were singing and flowers were blooming in the little park that Grillby favored for his walks when his apartment seemed to be closing in on him. It was nice and relaxing out here, the air fresh with a small current in it that let Grillby’s flames dance a bit.

There were a few children with their parents out here, some people walking their dogs or couples relaxing on the benches. It was positively idyllic.

And then Grillby saw Sans. He was standing in the middle of the small road, together with the young human that freed all monster, laughing with them while he stacked up Hotdogs on their head. He was wearing his usual blue jacket but also a pair of ridiculous sunglasses in the shape of flowers and a straw-hat, black shorts and some sort of sandals on his feet.

The human must have noticed him because they turned around and waving at Grillby, prompting Sans to turn around too. There was always a smile on Grillby’s friend but this one seemed… more like any other smile he saw on Sans. More… more peaceful.

Sans was happy, truly happy, and Grillby wondered if he had ever saw Sans happy like this.

“Hey, Grillby,” Sans said as he came closer. “fancy meeting you here. Is this your day off?”

Grillby nodded slowly. “I was… talking a walk.”

“Nice.”, chuckled Sans while Frisk signed quickly beside him.

 //We weren’t at Grillby’s for so long! How are you?//

“I am quite well.”, said Grillby softly. “Thank you for your concern… I haven’t heard from you…. in a while too. It is nice… to see you.”

Frisk nodded happily while Grillby looked over to Sans who looked… slightly guilty?

“Hey, kiddo… how about you go and get some nice-creme and we’ll meet up at the playground in a bit?”, Sans said, handing Frisk some money. The human nodded happily, waving at Grillby and took off.

And just like this he was left alone with Sans.

Sans who looked… more and more uncomfortable? Grillby’s flames lowered a bit more. Friends shouldn’t feel uncomfortable in each others present… right? Did their relationship change this much already?

“Uh… hey again.”, mumbled Sans, laughing slightly. “Wow it… it has been a while.”

“A… few weeks.”, said Grillby. It were six weeks and five days, not that he was counting.

“Wow… time flies huh?”, chuckled Sans nervously before sighing and looking down. “Look, Grillby… I am sorry. I just… so much stuff happened and I… felt kinda bad just popping in on you when you got so much to do too.”, he tried to explain. “I really should have come over more, huh?”

“You are… not under any obligation to visit me.”, said Grillby, trying to soot his friend.

“Still… it… I’m sorry.”, mumbled Sans.

“… I missed you.” was out of Grillbys mouth before he could swallow his own words and Sans blinked, looking at him with wide white eye-lights.

“You did?”, he asked and Grillby was… confused. He sounded like he didn’t expect it.

“Of course.”, he reassured Sans. “I… missed you a lot. Even with… many thing going on… I… would have understood. And enjoyed your company greatly not matter the context and quantity.”

Sans now looked even more guilty and Grillby felt a bit more distress at that.

“Shit Grills, I… I am really sorry now.”, Sans said, sighing. “How about… I’ll make it up to you?”

“… how…?”, asked Grillby surprised.

“Well, I got the day off, you got the day off… I just drop Frisk off to Toriel after this and then we can… meet up? Catch up on stuff?”

Grillby blinked at the offer but felt compelled to take it. He never really met Sans outside of his work but on the other hand, there was barely a time where he was off work in the Underground. So he found himself nodding.

“Alright… How about 3pm at yours?”, asked Sans. “I’ll get you and we’ll figure out where we go?”

Grillby thought shortly about. It was around 11am right now so it was not an unreasonable time. He could finish his walk like this and wouldn’t have to wait to long for their meet-up. So he nodded.

“Alright.”, Grillby said, just to make sure, feeling a smile spread on his face with the realization that he didn’t lost his dear friend apparently. He was looking forward to meeting up now, rekindling what they had in the Underground.

“Nice, it’s a date!”, cheered Sans before winking and teleporting away, most likely to get Frisk while Grillby was left standing frozen again.

 A.. a date?

[kmp78]

Christmas fest in Budapest 🇭🇺

Okay, first things first: 

sadly but not surprisingly the ripple effects from last year´s massacre in Berlin were clearly visible: the Budapest Christmas markets were surrounded by concrete blocks and ever-present police officers were packing not just tasers and hand guns, but also actual machine guns! 

I gotta say, it makes Christmas spirit a bit harder to come by when you have an Uzi in your line of sight at all times... 😔😨

But, it is what it is and all we can do is look forward to better times!  

If you are looking for a budget-friendly, extremely well-located, spotless AND FABULOUSLY NAMED hotel in Budapest, you need not look any further than...

Ehe. 😁

When I was surfing the net for accommodations and came upon this gem... Well, it was a done deal at that point!

The only thing that annoyed me were, shockingly, other tourists! I´m sorry all you Russians out there but I have to say it: learn some ferkin´ manners, Jesus Christ! Is Vladimir banning all citrus fruits from your country or was it just plain greed and nastiness that drove one of your countrymen to dip elbows deep into a bowl of lemons and shove them in his pockets?! Like... really? Couldn´t leave just one for my tea? Not that I would have wanted it anyway, what with his disgusting bare hands having groped them... Sick. 😠

Also the Brits sitting next to me were at their best (?) behavior and judged absolutely everything in sight. Apparently “this English breakfast isn´t proper English”.

Well... DUH! You ain´t in good ol´ Blighty now, guvnor! Suck it up! You can munch on your bangers and mash back home!

And fun fact: almost directly across from our hotel was... 😒

Mom´s comment when she saw these:

“Oh my, those pants are way too short! That looks so stupid! What kind of man would want to wear those?!”

I just wept in silence. She does not need to know. 🙊

MOVING ON!

Some local treats: the Hungarian KFC (shut up) offered something I had never seen nor tasted before called a “Qurrito box” which consists of a semi-Mexican style burrito thingie with chicken and rice and all that good stuff inside - it was really good! 😋

In some more non-fast foody selection, the markets had plenty of amazing and curious offerings!

An interesting observation about the Christmas markets in Budapest: they are very different from their counterparts in Berlin and Vienna etc. in the sense that here the stalls are very “down to earth” and not at all “mass production-like” as they tend to be in bigger cities. 

The goodies and crafts for sale were a lot more personal and homely, which I absolutely adored!

They utilize pine cones, dried fruits, vegetables, meats etc. in all imaginable ways with amazing results! 😍

If air travel wasn´t such a god damn hassle these days and bringing liquids on-board wasn´t a capitol offence, I so would have bought those pickled jalapeno/cabbage/paprika kitties! Look how cute, @ginie62! 😍

And yes, the markets were as picturesque as I had hoped for! 👌

Something that no decent Christmas market could ever be short on: BOOOOOOZE! ☕

To balance out all that drinking, you have to get some filler for your tummy as well, and when in Hungary you absolutely have to go for the most traditional Hungarian food of them all: goulash!

Really tasty and cheap! And on a chilly winter day, it also warms you up inside so win-win! 👌

If goulash does not tickle your fancy, you could try another local treat called lángos which is deep-fried dough topped with whatever you fancy, basically. Could be savory or sweet, anything goes!

I went for sour cream and grated cheese. YAS!

On another day I tried a lángos which was wrapped up in burrito-style, with salami, onions and cheese inside - yet another success story! 👏

And for dessert you have to sample another Hungarian delicacy: chimney cake!

It´s basically a wheat coffeebread which is first rolled around a mold and roasted over an open coal fireplace...

... and then while it´s steaming hot (aka steam rises from the center, making it look like a chimney!), it is rolled around in an assortment of flavoring options, such as cardamon, chocolate, cinnamon etc.

I went for the basic and traditional option aka cinnamon and sugar! Yumz! 👍

And for @kweenbeyass who might want to add Budapest to that bucket list: you´ll be happy to hear that they are extremely tourist-friendly over there! For example, on their main tram lines they have clearly marked all interesting sights along the way (in English) and indications where you have to get off! Very handy indeed! 😉

And any English language help you can get will be a plus, because the language is...

Yikes. 😨

And speaking of traveling: did you know that Budapest has the world´s 3rd oldest metro system? It dates back to 1896, and while it may not look like it belongs in the 21st century...

... I can assure you that it works like a charm! We never had to wait for more than 3 minutes for the next train! Sometimes I did almost wish we did have to wait around a bit longer because the stations were so adorably quaint!  😍

Another fun activity I always enjoy while abroad is lurking around the local grocery stores for all sorts of weirdness, and Budapest did not disappoint in that regard!

Gyros chips? Cheeseburger chips? Hotdog & ketchup chips? Pizza chips?

WHAT?

And this banana has got to be 11 and then some inches...

Ugh. 😵

The Market Hall is also worth checking out, if not for anything else then simply for the vibes of yesteryear. You can really sense the Soviet era still.

Fun fact: they had a random scale screwed to a wall which we could not figure out the purpose for, until we saw that people who had just purchased their potatoes and peas and whatnot marched over to that scale and measured what they had just bought aka they made sure the seller had not screwed them over with the weight of their produce! I guess not all people can be trusted...

And for any communist enthusiast, there were lots of trinkets on offer...

While in town, I discovered they had a Titanic exhibition which I naturally wanted to check out since Leo is my friend-in-law through six degrees of separation from Daddy-o and all.

They had built replicas of the cabins for the richies and the poor folks...

... and had actual items salvaged from the wreck itself! Whoa!

Budapest is also “littered” with fun and curious statues, like this little fella who I met alongside the Danube river.

This guy here had the best business idea! He juggles and entertains in front of cars who are waiting at the red light, and then before the light turns green he takes his hat off and does a quick round from car to car, collecting donations for the little show he put on! Genius! 👏

And while Bucharest may be the “official” residence of Count Dracula, Budapest also boasts some eerily majestic castles.

A nighttime activity you absolutely HAVE TO experience is a trek up to the Fisherman´s Bastion. Holy bejeebus, the views are... yes I will say it... INCREDIBLE. 👀

The Parliament House is also worth a closer look!  🤩

But please do be careful when trekking around after dark as the surrounding park is very poorly lit and there are dangerous steps and ledges all over - we had a near-catastrophic incident which luckily only resulted in a banged-up lip and bruised knees. 🙁

All in all, I can recommend Budapest as a vacay destination to anyone who is looking for a little taste of old time glory and ascetic vibes mixed with modern day comforts and conveniences! 👍

[our-springdays]

april 4: 浅草、スカイツリー、タワーレコード

I first had lunch with my lovely RA, Yuka at ごんべえ near Waseda :) They serve udon (hot & cold) there~ I don’t think I ever had cold udon back in the States now that I think about it!! I only tried cold soba.

This is called 月見うどん because the egg in the middle looks like the moon! Next we headed to the Hokusai Museum in Sumida for the Hokusai Beauty The Brilliant Women of Edo Exhibit. 

It’s so hard to take a full view of the museum!! But the architecture is beautiful.

This was a tiny park right across from the museum~ You can even see Sky Tree from here!! Also, a really adorable お婆さん saw us struggling to take a photo with the Sky Tree so she asked if we needed help. She was so confused with the iPhone that she ended up taking a selfie at first! And after we changed the view for her, she was holding the phone upside down to take the picture. She was ADORABLE!!! Such a nice and sweet lady!!!

Now onto the museum itself.. The admission fee is 700 yen for high school students and older. 1000 yen for adults. So make sure to bring your student IDs for the discount~ Also, apparently, if you wear a kimono, you can also get a discount!! No photography is allowed inside the exhibits!! It was extremely interesting to see how Hokusai depicted beautiful women back in the Edo period in his paintings. I was also able to learn a little about the concept of “beauty” and its evolution. Japanese women used to purposely blacken their teeth and use lead for foundation! That really surprised me because nowadays, no one wants black teeth. But supposedly, coloring their teeth black helped them with tooth decay!! How ironic.

After the museum, we went to 浅草 (Asakusa) to have some fun since it was still early in the day~

It’s Sky Tree again~ But now bigger! Now you're probably wondering what is that golden poop-looking thing in the distance as well. That is Asahi Super Dry Hall!! It is where their beer glasses are designed. So it is not actually poop!!

This is my extremely bad attempt at trying to take a decent picture of 浅草寺 (Sensoji). It was insanely crowded (as you can tell) and I didn’t want to linger so long because I am not a big fan of super crowded areas. Since it was so crowded we didn’t go inside the temple~ We just went straight to the street food! 

This is 餅ドッグ (Mochi Hotdog) from 安心や. As unappealing as my photo makes it to be, it is actually really good!! It’s mochi wrapped around a sausage with some ketchup. One is I think around 350 yen! Be careful because it can be a little hot~

This is ごま団子 from one of the little shops on the side~ I forgot how much this was, but Yuka paid for this. Thank you Yuka!! :)

This was the main reason why I really wanted to go to Asakusa!! This is the Level 7 green tea ice cream from 壽々喜園×ななや (Suzukien x Nanaya)! I’ve been dying to try this because I love green tea. Surprisingly, it wasn’t bitter at all!! I’m definitely a fan of this. One scoop in a cup is 560 yen. There is also a Hojicha flavor I think!  Also, please keep in mind that this shop closes very early!! I think the closing time was around 5pm, and this little boy was yelling cutely down the streets, "Please wait for us!! Don't close yet!!" in Japanese. It was SO cute!!!

Next, we took the bus to Sky Tree since it was closeby~ For some reason, in a lot of places in Japan, a mosquito ringtone(?) starts playing by entrances or big traffic areas. It’s kind of irritating once you notice it because you just want to walk away from it asap. When we got to the entrance of Sky Tree, the mosquito ringtone started playing. I asked Yuka why do they use noises like this, and she said she couldn’t hear anything. She even walked back to try to see if she could hear it & she couldn’t; she sounded genuinely worried for second for not being able to hear it (She’s so cute!!) Since she was the only one in the group who couldn’t hear it, she joked that maybe it’s to keep foreigners out LOL!!

After a bunch of walking around in Sky Tree trying samples and looking at shops, we finally sat down in the food court to have dinner! My feet were definitely about to give way because we walked so much. There are soooo many samples in Sky Tree!! You can literally get full from eating the samples. The ones that I really enjoyed were one of the cheesecake shops and one of the sweet potato desserts!! I wish I brought some back. Anyways~ The food in the picture is デミグラスハンバーグ (Demi-glacé hamburger steak) from グリル カキヤス (Grill Kakiyasu) in the food court! This was 880 yen and comes with rice and miso soup! 

This is Sky Tree at night illuminated! I didn’t go up to the observatory, but at least I got to see this~ It was also getting late, so.. you would have thought I was going back to the dorms.. Nope.. I didn’t forget what day April 4th was!!

FACE YOURSELF album is released today!!! So I went to Tower Records in Shibuya to support my favs. There are 3 limited edition versions of the album (A, B, and C) & 1 normal edition. With every purchase, you get a random member on the flyer~ I just went with Version C because it came with a photobook!

Here is my really bad attempt at taking photos again. The lighting wasn’t the best but I tried my best!

Here are the flyers that you can get! I was so confused at first because I saw some girls with a whole stack of flyers. I thought they worked there at first.. but it turns out they were just regular fans!! Oh~ And these albums weren’t accessible on the shelves. You have to get on line and request the cashier for it!!

And of course, I have to end this post with my beaming smile in front of the humungous poster. :) Thank you for giving me the energy to get through the day with your music~ If you haven’t listened to it already, I highly recommend Crystal Snow, Let Go, and Don’t Leave Me!

[checktheirfridge]

Fridge Analysis

Stonehill,

This is my boyfriend’s fridge. What do you think? We’ve been dating for about 5 months.

Love your blog! :)

-Stacie,

Stonehill Analysis

Hey Stacie,

We’re all dating detectives in our own way. Some of us might judge our dates on how they dress. Others judge on what’s on their bookshelves. Living in LA, some judge on what they drive.

I’ve found the most accurate indicator to be their refrigerator. Now, as I’ve always said, when it comes to dating, nothing is black and white. And when it comes to our fridge, it never tells our whole picture.

But what’s in our fridge does offer clues into our lifestyle and thus, what it would be like to date us.

When I look at your boyfriend’s fridge, can I tell if he’s the guy for you? Of course not, only you’ll know that. But we do get some insight…

The man’s got money

He’s got a side-by-side model. It’s generally more expensive than a top-bottom fridge and I can see by the left door, he’s got an ice/water dispenser, a luxe feature. This tells me he’s either a homeowner, or in a high-end rental.

Does money = happiness? Hell no. But it is one less issue to fight about if you guys move forward.

The fact that the manual is in the bottom drawer indicates that he’s either ludicrously lazy or has never fully settled in. You’d think if he was going to stick around, he’d put the damn thing in a drawer or chuck it by now.

He’s more about taking out than cooking in

If his condiment shelf was any more populated, it’d look like India. It’s clear most of his meals are prepared anywhere but his kitchen.

He might grill, which I like to see, as he has hotdogs and the BBQ big 3: mayo, mustard and ketchup. His other big meal is breakfast. He’s got eggs, bacon, country Crock and Coffee Mate for home brewed coffee. Chances are this is your crash pad on weekends.

He’s in good shape

He’s got Promax Protein Energy bars to fuel his workouts and build muscle. Plus, he downs Fish Oil, high in Omega-3 fatty acids, to prevent heart disease.

That, combined with his lack of junk food, tells me he puts a fine food forward to look good naked. As I preach, if you can’t make the effort to look your best when you’re single, odds are you’ll look even worse later.

The Dude abides

Your BF drinks like a man. No offense to Vodka, but it’s not a manly drink. It’s basically an alcohol to mix with something so it tastes like that something.

He’s more of a guy’s guy, as he prefers bourbon and Whiskey (though his Jameson should be larger than a Dixie Cup). For extra credit, he’s got tequila and beer on standby.

He’s from the Midwest

At times, a fridge can offer clues on geography and it does so here. He has Hy-Vee Grape Jelly. It’s a supermarket chain from the Midwest, and he ether lives there now or is pathetically cheap and dragged his jelly with him.

Of course, there’s more items to go on and I can’t say with absolute certainty whether he’s a doll or a douche. But I do like what I see here. And that’s always a good start.

Fridge Dating Scorecard

Bang on first date: 7 The guy looks like he’s got game to close early. He’s probably social (he has a large bag of ice even though he’s got an ice maker), in shag shape and is financially independent.

That combined with liquor for a nightcap, ice cream for dessert and breakfast in bed come morning? I don’t know what you’re attracted to, but we all need to clean the pipes and I see nothing here that would stop you.

Marry: 7 I see qualities that are important in a partner. He looks like he has his shit together, takes pride in his looks, and knows how to have a good time.

That’s enough to stick around Positive Town. To paint this picture any further, we’d need more insight from you.

Sleeping with the Enemy: 3 The only red flag I see is the manual. For whatever reason, it seems a bit weird that he’s been living in his pad for a while, yet can’t find a better place for it.

The left door can use a wipe down, but it’s a relatively neat fridge and even has baking soda. Looks like all’s quiet on the Wackypack Front.