#THE FINAL PART | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

morganski-19 · 1 year ago

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Things I Won't Say When I'm Sober: The Final Part

part 1, part 5

Steve is standing on Eddie’s porch, trying not to freak out. The nerves have been buzzing ever since the phone call ended. He could barely sleep but forced himself to try because he couldn’t think straight. Eddie probably couldn’t either, probably can’t even now. But Steve can’t wait any longer, so Eddie’s just going to have to deal with it while being hungover.

Just getting into his car to drive here this morning made Steve so nervous he almost didn’t come at at. Having to face the drunken words that Eddie whispered into the phone last night is frightening. Especially since he might not even have meant to say it, might not even remember it.

Steve has only seen Eddie drunk a few times. All of it has been like it was last night, slurring words and overly affectionate. If Steve was there next to him, Eddie would have been lying across him in some sort of way, just getting as close to Steve as he possibly could. Some of those times, Eddie would say something that he didn’t remember the next morning, but would own up to it in the morning, cause it came out of his mouth so it must have been true. Drunk words being sober thoughts and all that.

The thing is though, the words Eddie spoke didn’t feel like drunk words. Sure he was drunk, but Eddie said it so softly that it sounded like he meant it. There wasn’t any slurring, no messing up or taking any breaks. He knew what he was saying, just needed the confidence to do so.

For some reason, that was what Steve scared the most. He was prepared to deal with it being a joke, that Eddie was just messing with him because he was wasted. He was prepared for Eddie to take it all back and run away from his feelings and they would just go back to normal.

What scared him though was if Eddie admitted it. Admitted that he meant what he said and he does like Steve back. He wants something more and hopes to god that Steve wants it too. He doesn’t think Steve likes him back, so he’d be scared and hope that they could still be friends after this. The same fear that has crushed Steve since he realized too.

Admitting it to him isn’t what scared him though, what happens after does. Would they give this a try? Would it work? Or would it all come crumbling down like the last time Steve was in love?

Steve isn’t in love with Eddie, not yet. But he can tell that given the chance, he could. And he knows that that love could be really good. The type of love you know could last forever, but when it doesn’t it leaves you shattered. Steve doesn’t want to shatter again. He knows that Eddie has the capability to do it though. The feelings that he has for the other man are just too much for him to handle.

With a shaky hand, Steve knocks on the door. He has to get this over with, has to know. Can’t walk away without knowing if he meant it. If the words whispered so quietly that Steve could barely hear are true.

The door creaks open as Steve is met with Eddie in his pajamas, squinting at the sunlight. “Hey, Steve,” he says, almost defeated.

“Hey, can I come in?”

“Can’t say that I’ll be the best company, but sure.” After Steve walks into the trailer, Eddie lets the door slam shut before walking over to the couch and faceplanting with a long groan.

“Tough night?” Steve asks, acting innocent.

Eddie turns his head to the side to glare at Steve. “Take a look in the trash can.”

Lifting up the lid, Steve finds a pile of beer bottles. “Yeah, sounds about right. You eat yet?”

“No, been trying not to throw up.”

“I’m making you some food,” Steve concludes, already opening the fridge. He expects Eddie to protest, but he says nothing.

He starts the coffee pot before cracking some eggs into a pan. Eddie slumps off of the couch before slinking over to the counter, taking a seat when Steve plates the eggs.

“Thanks,” he mutters as Steve slides the plate in front of him. Steve pours coffee into a mug and adds sugar and creamer before placing that in front of Eddie as well.

He washes the dishes as Eddie eats in silence. When Eddie finishes the eggs, he washes that plate too.

“So,” Steve starts, not exactly knowing how to finish. “You called me last night.”

Eddie hangs his head. “Yeah,” he presses his fingertips into his eye, “Yeah I did.”

“You remember what you said?” Steve asks, heart beating fast.

He shakes his head, ashamed. “Yeah, shit.” Eddie braces his elbows on the counter and holds his head in his hands. “I do.”

“Ok.” Steve doesn’t quite know how to move on.

“Did you, did you hear everything?” Eddie says, muffled by his hands.

Steve crosses his arms and leans against the sink. “I think I did.”

“Shit, I’m too hungover for this conversation.” Eddie continues to hide in his hands, hiding his expression from Steve.

“I can go if you want.” He doesn’t want to, but seeing Eddie struggling to face this is enough to push him away.

Eddie shakes his head, pulling himself out of his hands and chugging the rest of the coffee. “No, no. As much as I hate it, I said what I said and I’m sure you have questions. I would rather get it over with than prolong the inevitable. I’m going to go get changed, and then we’ll. Fuck, we’ll talk about it.”

He gets up without looking at Steve, shutting the door to his bedroom softly behind him. Steve walks out of the kitchen, running his hands through his hair. Eddie remembers what he said, and it sounds like he means it. Disbelief fills Steve, unable to even think that is the truth. He crosses his arms, trying to not pace around the room waiting for Eddie to come out.

When he does, he walks back to the living room, nervously playing with a piece of his hair. “So,” he says, looking at Steve.

“So.”

“Um. So I heard the last part of the conversation you had with Robin that morning,” Eddie starts.

Steve nods. “Yeah, you said that.”

Eddie crosses his arms. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to, just happened. Thin walls and all. I-I want you to know that I don’t have a problem with it. I’m sorry that you didn’t get to tell me on your own terms, but you didn’t know I was gay, which I am by the way, so I understand how scary that has been for you.”

“Thank you. For the apology and for telling me.”

“I was going to tell you eventually, just didn’t know when to say it.”

Steve clears his throat. “How much exactly did you hear?”

“That you haven’t felt like this in a while. Then Robin asked if you were sure that he didn’t like you back, which revealed that you like guys and that you were sure he didn’t. Which is stupid by the way, whoever you like is dumb for not liking you back.”

The irony in that statement almost makes Steve smile. “You said that too. More detailed though.”

“Yeah,” Eddie’s jaw clenches. “Yeah, I know. Just so I know, you don’t have to say, but do you still like, you know?”

“Yeah, I still like girls. I like both. Don’t really know what it means though.”

“That’s ok. You can always figure out if you want to label that later but-.” Eddie breaks eye contact with Steve again. “Did you hear what I said right before I hung up?”

How could Steve not, those words have been floating around his head all night. “Yes, I did.”

“Fuck,” Eddie exhales, hiding his face in his hands again and walking in a circle. “So you know.”

“Know what, Eddie?” As much as he would love to give Eddie a break, he needs to hear the words in order to actually believe them.

Eddie faces him again, arms falling to his sides. He looks defeated, upset, opening his mouth up and closing it again. Until he says, “That I like you.”

“You like me,” Steve says, breath punched out of his lungs.

“That is what I said,” Eddie nods.

Steve walks over to Eddie and grabs him by the arms. “You, Eddie Munson, like me, Steve Harrington?”

“Yes, Steve, I do.”

He needs to hear it, craves to hear it again and again until his brain chooses to believe it. “Really. You really like me?”

“Yes,” Eddie says annoyed. “How many times do I have to tell you? If you have a problem with it just tell me and I’ll piss off and-”

Eddie can’t finish his sentence before Steve lets himself make a stupid decision, finally doing what he wants and kisses him. Grabbing Eddie’s head with both hands without thinking and pulls him in, pressing their lips together awkwardly as Eddie is still talking. Eddie’s surprised at first, but quickly starts to kiss back. Wrapping an arm around Steve’s back and cupping his cheek with the other.

They break before coming back together again, Steve’s hands sliding back into Eddie’s hair. He can’t believe that it’s really happening, that this is something that’s even real. The flutter in his heart is the only thing reminding him that he’s still awake. That this isn’t some dream but reality.

He thinks that it’s stupid that he wasted so much time being scared about this. That he almost walked away before he knocked, risking leaving this behind. Sure he’s scared. These feelings he has for Eddie are real and they go deep. Deeper feelings than he’s had with any of his other first kisses. But right now, that doesn’t matter. Right now, Eddie’s kissing him back, showing him he wants this too. That he’s as happy that Steve kissed him as Steve is.

Steve’s scared, a part of him always will be. There’s always the chance that this won’t work out, that he’ll end up shattered again. But right now, that doesn’t matter. Some risks are worth taking when they make you feel like this.

Eddie breaks the kiss, pressing his forehead against Steve’s. When he opens his eyes, the first thing Steve sees is Eddie’s smile, and he can’t help but smile back.

“So,” Steve starts, giggling. “You are the guy that I like, if you couldn’t tell.”

Eddie laughs. “I sure hope I was. You don’t kiss people like that if you don’t like them. At least I hope not.”

“I do though,” Steve says, running his thumb across Eddie’s cheek, because he can. “I really do like you.”

“Well good. Cause I really like you, Steve.” Eddie kisses him again, shorter this time, but sweeter. “I was so scared that I ruined everything last night.”

Steve shakes his head. “You didn’t. Honestly, if you hadn’t called, this probably wouldn’t have happened. I was so scared that you would have found out and that would have ruined it.”

“It wouldn’t have. What I said was right, whoever you liked would have been stupid for not liking you back. And I’m a lot of things but apparently stupid isn’t one of them.”

“No, you’re not.” Steve kisses him again, bringing him as close as possible.

He’s happy, the worries and stresses evaporated as if they were never there. All that is left is him and Eddie, together. It doesn’t matter what they are, or what they’re going to be. Not right now at least. All that matters is that he’s here. He might not have been the one to say it first, but who cares? Eddie likes him back, and Steve told him he likes him too. Something so simple but so hard at the same time.

But more importantly, this doesn’t feel wrong to him anymore, it feels like the most right thing he’s ever done.

full will be on ao3 later tonight Thanks to all of you who followed along, hope you enjoyed the story. This was my first time doing a story that was posted weekly on tumblr and not ao3 and I really enjoyed it. I will definitely be doing this a lot more. Thank you once again to @imfinereallyy for the post that inspired this piece.

Tag list: tag list: @imfinereallyy @estrellami-1 @paintsplatteredandimperfect @overhillunderhill @renaissan-vvitch @ashwagandalf @sirsnacksalot @lorelei724 @emly03 @super-cosmic-library @rozzieroos @dolphincliffs @henderdads @abyssal808 @evergreenprose @demolvr @steddiehyperfixation @stedumpsterfire @ent-is-indecisive @steddierthings @makeadealwithdean @kas-eddie-munson @extra-transitional @lunaticmarunatic @steveharringtonmilf @cardboardqueen @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @panicatthediaz @ellietheasexylibrarian @hallucinatedjosten @awkwardgravity1 @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @its-a-me-a-morgan @messrs-weasley @dreamlandforever @stevesbipanic @inmoonywetrust @sani-86 @aellafreya @lorelei724 @punkprettyboyprincess @stoopidstrwbrry @martinskis-lydias @a-gae-af-racoon @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @goodolefashionedloverboi @genderless-spoon

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #stranger things fanfic #stranger thigns ficlet #part 6 #the final part #it is finally done #hope you enjoyed #things i wont say when i’m sober #steddie fanfic #getting together #actually this time #cw: mentions of drinking

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