#Societal Norms

[musingsofanaroace]

Society: One day, you'll meet someone, fall in love, and get married. What my AroAce ass heard: One day, you'll meet someone, bond over your shared interests, and become best friends.

[tranquil-slaughterhouse]

Would I be accused of having toxic individualism if I said I wasn't interested in listening/buying the latest popular* pop album?

*like either popular on this website and/or western English-speaking countries

[uncommon-lamp]

Ok so I'm no philosopher.

Today I was sitting at my campus and I saw a woman, dressed in a power suit with her makeup and hair done with her shoes and socks off in the grass. That's a little odd, I thought to myself, normally grass-enjoyers are more of the "crunchy granola" type (I live in California). And I realized that I hadn't had my bare feet in the grass since I was a young child. Why? It wasn't socially common. But here I was, seeing this very professional looking woman enjoying the tactile pleasure of the natural world. "That's a good idea" I said to her, feeling a bit bolder than usual.

So I took my shoes and socks off and walked around in the grass. And it was delightful. And it was the best I felt in days. And I realized that I never would have had that delight if it weren't for this lovely woman who showed me, silently, passively, that she wanted to feel grass beneath her feet.

And it made me think about how we as a species lead by example. We aren't a hive mind, obviously. We have free will, but so much of what we do is informed by our peers. How we look to other. What's acceptable. What's expected. What's normal.

And it made me think... Of everything. Every time I've realized I want food when my friends do. Every time I've danced while at a party when there are others willing to do the same. Every time I've been the second person to laugh or talk or cry. Every time I've offered money to the homeless after seeing someone else do so first. Not because I didn't want to, but because I didn't want to be the only one.

And I think that maybe the one of the many reasons we have "i-pad kids" is because they're not being lead by example. We're on our phones, so are they. They don't know the pleasure of reading because we don't give them a reason to wonder.

The reason we may not have as much empathy and sympathy is because we're not used to showing it. The reason we have trouble talking about our feelings and wants and needs in social spaces is because we don't want to be the first one.

Because kindness begets kindness. Or, at least, interest begets interest, and when there's interest, there's a possibility for change. Inertia is the killer.

So read in public, read to your children, teach kids how to act and be around others. Foster empathy, charity, humility, tell people, especially kids, why it's important. Make it normal to be a nice person for the sake of it. Be public, smile at people, say hello to people, be yourself. Just be.

You might be the reason someone feels the grass beneath their feet, and smiles at you and wonders why they took so long to realize they wanted to.

That's how I want to live, anyway.

[midnight-specialist]

Figure out your attachment style. Find out why yelling makes you uncomfortable. Solve the mystery of where that anger comes from. Question your wants, are they inner voices or internalized external voices from society? Family? Culture? Religion? Why does your need for validation express itself the way it does? What type of people do you attract? What type of friend do you want to be? Why are you implicitly attracted to chaos? Things to be figured out and questions to be answered by none other than yourself without masking it with sarcasm or humor. Have those painful inner monologues! By granting yourself space to get to know you from your roots and outward you take back your power that was stolen from you the moment those around you started perceiving you. and that is the very highest form of power.

[gpstudios]

Title: Observing World Childless Week: Understanding and Supporting a Diverse Path to Fulfillment

Introduction World Childless Week, held annually in the third week of September, is a global initiative aimed at raising awareness and fostering understanding about the experiences of those who are childless by circumstance or choice. This week is dedicated to acknowledging the diverse paths to fulfillment and offering support to individuals and couples navigating life without children. Explore…

[lifenconcepts]

Fuck it I ain’t bothered on writing this out but I feel like this hits hard and is kinda important so if you wanna try decipher it like it’s some ancient texts go ahead but I assure you, there will be challenges when you read this.

[melodiclyre]

A common societal trend I’ve noticed is quite prevalent is the romanticization of certain mental disorders and the infantilization of others. This trend thoroughly befouls our perception of people with such disorders, and in certain circumstances this can be quite harmful.

Disorders such as depression, OCD, and, even to a certain extent, anxiety are all heavily romanticized in literature and media. Characters with these conditions are constantly sought after, and seen as beautifully broken. Their suffering is seen in itself as an art of its own.

Whereas characters, as well as people, who are on the autism spectrum or have ADHD, are very often infantilized, their behaviors being described as childlike. They may be seen as annoying, bothersome, or just a pain to deal with in general. Their pain is not seen as poetic, but essentially meaningless, because their plights seem so trivial. If they are doted on, it’s often demeaning.

I’m certainly not blameless in this cultural phenomenon, but I do believe that it’s truly messed up. I wish to understand why mass behaviors such as these exist. Why do we perceive certain conditions in different lights, and is it possible that society’s preconceived notion of these disorders can change?

[lillesbloom]

Tuned in

When it’s het, it’s a ship,

Gals embrace, not a blip.

Media frenzy, a race to be first,

To quench that 1950’s patriarchal thirst.

So many signs, completely ignored,

Never seeing the prom queen as what they abhor.

We see you and the game, through this obvious charade.

Between worlds, yet in both, a bandit, but shooting straight.

Is it deception when it’s in plain sight?

Screaming in color, but filmed black and white?

Assumptions and narratives, looks are deceiving,

But we still tune in to your narrative that we’re receiving.

-Lille B.

[afraidtospeak]

I am unlovable.

You reminded me of the fact for as long as I could remember.

I was eight years old when you told me I needed to sit properly because nobody likes a girl who cannot.

I was nine and then ten when you told me I needed to lose weight because nobody likes a girl with the extra chub.

I was eleven and then twelve when you told me I needed to speak quietly because nobody likes a loud girl.

I was thirteen when my hair started falling and the weight fell away and my head grew lighter. You told me I looked pretty.

I was fourteen and then fifteen when I had to cut my hair off, too thin.

I was sixteen when the weight started coming back and you told me I should go back to the way I looked.

I was seventeen when the mirror and the clothes I wore became the two most feared things in my life.

I was eighteen when the mere sight of food made me recoil in disgust.

You did not call me unlovable, but you made me feel inadequate in every way possible until I realised I was not lovable.

If you could not—if I could not love myself, who could possibly ever love me?

~𝒯

[nickysfacts]

Who said protesting societal norms has to be a hassle?

🚬🚺☠️

[musingsofanaroace]

Making Friends?

For me, making friends remains an enigma. A complex, unsolvable algebraic equation. I know that the fault lies with my unique and quirky personality, but I have no clue how to rectify the situation. For I see the world through a monotropic lens. A neurodivergent lens. An AuDHD lens. An AroAce lens. An agender lens.

I tend to push people away when I get sucked into an "attention tunnel" that transforms into a Minoan maze. A maze that can take hours, days, months to find my way through. Sometimes, I hyper-focus on a special interest that I had since childhood: doo-wop, ancient civilizations, dinosaurs. Other times, I hyper-focus on a short-term special interest: Elvis Presley, underwater search and recovery, indie horror games, psychology.

I tend to push people away when I don't know the social script I should follow; and therefore, I come across as weird and a bit creepy: I rock from side to side, walk on my toes, play with the tag on my shirt, and summarize each one of my special interests to see if any of them lands. Rarely does my communication style prove effective. Once, I freaked out somebody when I told them that I liked cookies dipped in orange juice. From that day forward, they avoided me like the plague.

I tend to push people away when I develop a "squish" on them. I'll want to know everything about them and to spend all my free time with them. To go with them on long, meandering walks; to go with them to museums, historical monuments, and concerts; and to go with them to parks filled with vibrant colors, tantalizing scents, and breathtaking sights.

I tend to push people away when I tell them I'm agender and prefer they/them pronouns. They can't see beyond the binary world they have concocted from gossamer thread and cotton candy daydreams. Forever they see the world in black and white, never shades of gray. Forever they see the world as gay or straight, never all the sexualities in between or those not even on the spectrum. Forever they see the world as male or female, never taking into account that intersex and nonbinary people exist. Forever trapped in a world full of sharp edges and precipitous cliffs.

I feel doomed to constantly drown in a tidal wave of societal norms and exceptions written in a foreign language lost to the ravages of time. Doomed to have no friendships beyond the one I made in senior school. Doomed to wander amid this massive swarm of humanity always befuddled and forever flummoxed.

Well, that's all I have for today. Until next time, take care and stay curious.

[miomediator]

I kinda baffle me that Strifing in Homestuck is generally accepted and never questioned, like there's never an opposing stance in any fan work. [excluding Dave's relationship with it] As someone pacific in nature, I woulda expect some stories, maybe with original characters, covering anti-strife topics. You know, like with challenging gender norms and societal expectations. Threads/messages on social media would be like: "It's okay if you don't like strifing" or "I never liked the idea of fightning, am I weird?", "my parents and relatives keep pushing me picking a strife specibus but the thought of it makes me nauseous, help", "everyone's picking on me cause I suck at strifing", "the reason of why I stopped strifing"…

Strifing seems to be such an expectation in HS, and I know it's because of Lord English's influence. But beyond the main cast, it would be logical to have people questioning and even rejecting fighting as a regular societal practice.

Hussie may be allergic to worldbuilding, but it would be neat to see this kind of thing in fanfics and fan comics.

[jupiter-cafe]

On Being an Introvert in the Philippines

Introduction

Exploring the lively and social culture of the Philippines as an introvert can be challenging and complex. In a country where family and community are largely valued, introverts frequently find themselves going against the societal norm. Let's delve into the distinct difficulties and challenges faced by introverts in the Philippines, including my own experiences.

Understanding Collectivism in the Philippines' Culture

Collectivism is deeply wired in Filipino culture, where the norm favors groups, family, and community over an individual. For example, Filipinos frequently seek guidance and advice from their families when making significant life decisions like career choices or marriage. Family and community play an important part in Filipino society, with major life decisions generally involving the entire family, including the extended family. The culture of having an extended family living together and helping and supporting each other in their day-to-day lives is also prevalent.

The Challenges of Family and Social Gatherings

As a kid, I recall how family gatherings were a regular thing to do when there would be an occasion, such as attending family reunions during fiestas in the province. While I respected the close-knit nature of Filipino families, these gatherings would often be an exchange of communications among relatives. The anticipation to interact with them would be draining for an introvert. Filipinos value social harmony and tend to avoid conflicts and confrontations. It's common for individuals to maintain polite interactions by abstaining from expressing disagreement when they hold differing opinions during family gatherings.

The Impact of Barrio Fiestas and Religion

Barrio fiestas in the Philippines are significant community fests. These occasions emphasize community involvement and social relations, which can be a draining activity for an introvert due to the crowds and nonstop socializing. Religion also plays a part in adding to the collectivist culture of the Philippines, with the majority of the population being Catholic. Religious values often affect the significance of community, family, and social harmony.

The Extroverted Nature of Filipino Culture

In the Philippines, being sociable is the norm. Striking up conversations with people in public places like markets or public transportation is common, as is befriending people and having a group of friends. This can be surprising for an introvert who prefers solitude. Introverts in the Philippines may feel pressured to engage in social events regularly, leading to exhaustion. The extroverted culture can overshadow the contributions of introverts, making them feel misunderstood and undervalued.

Personal Experiences and Educational Challenges

Personally, I have often been criticized for being quiet, labeled as a "snob" or a "weirdo" by family and acquaintances. In terms of educational settings, curriculums in the country's education comprise group activities, performance-based tasks, recitations, etc. In which introverted students may struggle to thrive, affecting their grades and self-confidence.

Tips for Thriving as an Introvert

For introverts in the Philippines, finding quiet spaces, setting boundaries, and connecting with like-minded individuals can be beneficial. Embracing one's introverted traits and communicating openly about needs can help introverts thrive in an extroverted culture.

Conclusion

Being an introvert in the Philippines comes with its own set of challenges and opportunities for growth. By understanding and appreciating the cultural values of collectivism and social harmony, as well as the extroverted nature of Filipino culture, introverts can navigate their social landscape more effectively. So, embrace your unique traits, set those boundaries, and find your balance—you've got this!

Resources

Cruz, I. J. (2000). Culture and its influence on Filipino psychology. Quezon City: University of the Philippines Press.

Enriquez, V. G. (1994). From colonial to liberation psychology: The Philippine experience.

Manila: De La Salle University Press.Hofstede Insights. (n.d.). Philippines - Country comparison. Retrieved from https://www.hofstede-insights.com/en/countries/philippines/

Lising, R. A. (2018). Understanding Filipino psychology: A guidebook for teachers and students. Manila: Rex Bookstore.

[1introvertedsage]

Society has gotten so comforted with lies, the truth is offensive now.

[blueheartbookclub]

Unveiling Social Constructs: A Review of "Pygmalion" by Bernard Shaw

Bernard Shaw's "Pygmalion" is a thought-provoking play that transcends time, weaving together themes of class, identity, and societal expectations with wit, humor, and insight. First performed in 1913, the play follows the transformative journey of Eliza Doolittle, a Cockney flower girl, who becomes the subject of a bet between the phonetics professor Henry Higgins and Colonel Pickering. As Higgins attempts to mold Eliza into a refined lady through speech lessons, "Pygmalion" explores the intricacies of language, social mobility, and the power dynamics inherent in class distinctions.

At its core, "Pygmalion" challenges the notion of fixed social hierarchies and underscores the arbitrary nature of class distinctions. Shaw deftly exposes the absurdity of equating social status with inherent worth, presenting characters whose true value lies not in their birthright but in their character and individual agency. Through Eliza's transformation from a humble flower girl to a confident, independent woman, Shaw highlights the fluidity of identity and the potential for self-determination, regardless of one's social origins.

Moreover, "Pygmalion" is a testament to Shaw's mastery of dialogue and character development. The play is replete with sharp, witty exchanges that not only entertain but also serve to illuminate the complexities of human nature and interpersonal relationships. From Higgins's acerbic wit to Eliza's spirited defiance, Shaw creates characters that are as memorable as they are multidimensional, inviting audiences to empathize with their struggles and triumphs.

One of the most compelling aspects of "Pygmalion" is its exploration of the power dynamics inherent in language and communication. Shaw exposes how linguistic norms and accents serve as markers of social status, relegating those who speak differently to the margins of society. Through Higgins's efforts to "improve" Eliza's speech, the play raises important questions about agency, autonomy, and the ethics of linguistic imperialism, prompting audiences to reflect on the ways in which language shapes our perceptions of ourselves and others.

Furthermore, "Pygmalion" is a richly layered work that rewards careful analysis and interpretation. Shaw infuses the play with symbolism and allegory, drawing parallels between Eliza's transformation and the myth of Pygmalion, the sculptor who fell in love with his own creation. By framing Eliza's journey as a modern-day retelling of this myth, Shaw invites audiences to consider the ways in which art, identity, and desire intersect in shaping human experience.

In conclusion, "Pygmalion" is a timeless masterpiece that continues to resonate with audiences for its incisive social commentary, vibrant characters, and sparkling wit. Shaw's exploration of class, identity, and language remains as relevant today as it was over a century ago, inviting audiences to question societal norms and challenge the status quo. With its enduring relevance and timeless appeal, "Pygmalion" stands as a testament to Shaw's genius as a playwright and his unwavering commitment to social justice and human dignity.

Bernard Shaw's "Pygmalion" is available in Amazon in paperback 12.99$ and hardcover 19.99$ editions.

Number of pages: 188

Language: English

Rating: 9/10                                           

Link of the book!

Review By: King's Cat