#So i mention both of them when ppl ask what ive been up to

[frobby]

Yoo joonghyuk would love cookie clicker

[toastsnaffler]

ykw actually I am angry + disappointed w them. I've been pushing how I feel aside and trying to make it my own fault so it's all contained but I think theyve just been mean. and they really should know me better ik I try to pretend I don't expect more from them so I feel less hurt when they do things that upset me but we've been friends for years by this point. like come on.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA for inviting my cousin to an LGBT meet up?

Cw: mentions of suicide and transphobia

I (18M) am a trans man and my cousin N (21F) is a lesbian who is very masc presenting. We're the only queer cousins in the family (at least in our generation) so weve always been good friends and shes been one of the biggest supporters of my transition, defended me from bigoted family members and always corrected family when they used my deadname/old pronouns. I lowkey hoped she would come out as a trans man or nonbinary as well. We dress in the same style which makes it so when were hanging out together one of us is gonna get misgendered since people asume both of us are trans men or masc girls. When N is the one being misgendered she doesnt bother fighting it since its more trouble than its worth but looking back i think it really annoyed her.

Earlier this year N was severely struggling with her mental health. I apologize for the wording i may have since i dont know the proper terminology for this stuff or any specific disorder diagnosis she may have (other than autism). She was having some sort of manic or depressive episode. She was dead set on pushing people away and making them hate her so she could take her own life without regrets.

I visited N once to give her my support during a struggling time but i stupidly told her there was nothing she could say that would push me away. She told me not to test her but i kept pushing it and i admit what happened next was my fault. She told me in a very cold voice that she was a terf, though that she didnt want me dead but that "we" (im guessing she meant trans ppl) made it so much harder for her to exist(???????). I didnt let her keep talking just and left her room, said my goodbyes to her family and just cried while driving home.

Im still not sure if she meant it or if it was part of her mental episode and just a way for her to hurt me and push me away. On one hand ig it explains some of her behavior? N sometimes complained when she got asked for her pronouns or being misgendered like I mentioned before. On the other hand, I gen do not believe she has been a terf all along esp with how supportive shes been of me. If she was a terf youd think she would try to subtly talk me out of it, but that has never happened. My friends have nicknamed her schrodinger's terf lol

Anyway, i went no contact with N for a few months for my own wellbeing. During this time i heard that she tried to kill herself a few times, which got her into a mental hospital. She was given higher doses of meds and seems to be doing way better.

We had a family reunion this week and i decided to approach her. N seemed a little hesitant to talk to me but stayed polite. I tried testing her and talked about the effects T has been having on me but she acted like she always had and congratulated me and even complimented me on how deep my voice has gotten. I wasnt satisfied cause i wanted an apology for what she had said to me so i pushed it more. She did end up apologzing but it was a very surface level apology. At this point i didnt want to keep pushing in case it set her off again so i just took her apology (plus i wanted my best cousin back) and spent the rest of the day hanging out with her.

On the way home my mom said she was happy me and N had made up and that i should invite her to the lgbt club meetings Ive been going to this year. It seemed like a good idea to me, she lost a few friends during her episode and she could make more queer friends here. If N is trans and just in denial it could help her get the resources she needs to feel comfortable coning out. If N IS a terf maybe having more positive interactions with trans ppl could change her mind on it. Overall i thought it would be a win for her.

I brought it up to my friends and some of them blew up at me. Their argument was that itd be exposing the other trans ppl in the group to a terf and putting them in danger. I truly hadnt considered this angle so im kinda conflicted now. She had never felt like an unsafe person before and now that her episode is over she feels normal again. Even if she is a terf i dont think she could actually cause harm? I want N to get better but i dont want to put my trans friends at risk.

So tumblr, WIBTA for inviting N to my lgbt meet up?

What are these acronyms?

[seinarutamago]

Ik ppl on tumblr will understand my rambles bc i have this AU ive been wanting to draw of zosan.

Highschool/school AU where zoro is an international transfer student and sanjis got beef with him for some reason...

This was based off this tweet. I just WANT TO EXPAND ON IT with my own twists.

I have perona in my head as his translator or part of his homestay family (mihawk and perona). And she kinda translates for him until hes used to speaking and understanding english more.

Sanji... idk what his deal is bc it could he oh hes trynna enjoy his last years of HS and suddenly zoro steals away the attention from "his ladies" (yk hes a flirt but cant score) so hes beefing with zoro. OR sanji has his gay awakening seeing zoro but won't come to terms with it and is mad at zoro bc of it. Or fuck it both why the hell not.

100% they have these little battles that at first zoro didnt pick up on and zoro eventually does but doesnt let sanji know at all. Bc he wants to be an ass.

I feel like sanji would try to stalk investigate zoro. Follow him around to find something to poke fun at him with. But it ends up them walking around the building for an hour bc zoro couldn't find a classroom... when he passed it 20 times. Oh, sanji did not let him live it down, but if u mention why he was following zoro, hed kill you

Nami and usopp are just side eyeing each other like. Really dude. And they are shocked when sanji denies he likes men bc they thought lowkey he was a little fruity....

Luffy in this AU 100% brings zoro in with his group of friends bc he wants to hear abt japan life (and ask stupid unrealistic questions abt japan) and sanji has to suck it up...

[whumpshaped]

im asking more hungary questions today... do u celebrate mikulás day and if not what DO you celebrate? or is it just christmas the way we know it in america?

sorry if this weird, from what i've seen the celebration days seem to vary a lot so im curious!

-@rule-masochism

I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY ABOUT THIS.

SO mikulás is the hungarian word santa claus for anyone whos wondering. mikulás/santa day in hungary is on december 6th, and it's complerely separate from christmas. kids put their boots out in the window and receive treats and gifts in it! (yes i always put both boots out bc... choccy... i needed as much as possible...)

and u know how bad kids get coal in america or whatever? bad kids in hungary get smth called virgács. its this thing. it gets translated by google as like "rod" or "birch" its basically meant as like "u should be fucken beaten w this thing for being bad". from what ive always seen, most santa day packages have virgács in them lol but like, along w the treats. ive never seen a kid actually just receive that as like a punishment ajdjdk just as im sure not many ppl just receive coal for christmas

now christmas is totally different thats obviously on the 25th (in our household, the 24th, but we're the exception since thats normally just christmas eve) but... if santa came on the 6th then who brings the gifts, u might ask. BABY JESUS. ITS BABY JESUS! baby jesus brings the gifts...

as for some other customs, we dont do stockings as far as i know. santa and the reindeer are a popular motif and stuff but it doesnt quite make sense for christmas? it makes more sense for santa day on the 6th... idk as a kid growing up w hungarian traditions but A Lot of american influence, i kind of associate the reindeer and the sleigh with both holidays, but i also remember mixing them up and thinking baby jesus was going around in a sleigh- idk. weird times. kid brains do Things.

basically we have two separate holidays in december and on the 6th we get some chocolate and maybe some smaller gifts and then the actual big gift stuff comes on christmas. also leading up to christmas we do advent calendars which are also a thing in america i think. i always had so much chocolate in december bc i got TWO advent calendars with chocolate for every day from my parents and grandparents and then me and my brother also had an additional advent calendar that was a cloth thing that we hung up in our rooms with pockets for each day and every day some kinda treat would Magically Appear in it. so much chocolate.

also i have to tell this story- my mom unearthed some incredibly old letter i wrote as a kid to jesus (with my christmas wishlist). and listen... i had no idea where the man lived so i put down the address as heaven street 777... no further comment on the matter

oh also part of advent preparations is the advent wreath! we light a candle every sunday leading up to christmas. the one with the 3 purple and 1 pink candle is the traditional, the pink candle is lit on the third sunday. the colour purple represents fasting, repentance, and reflection. the pink candle is for joy and the virgin mary. separately, the candles in order symbolise faith, hope, joy, and love.

also if ur in church during the holidays (and ur catholic) then u know the priest also wears purple during the advent time (the other time he wears purple is easter and when ur one-on-one confessing). and he wears pink on the third sunday. thats just smth i mention bc i think its neat, i havent been to church in a decade lmao

thats all i can think of!

[kittyvolvox]

It’s been a minute since I’ve seen ST2…if you don’t mind, can you elaborate more about your post regarding the name Jane…cause I feel the same way, like she would like to reclaim her name and what she’s lost, but I always see people say she prefers El because it’s an affectionate nickname or something.

okay so basically the second-half of s2 jane is completely seperated from hawkins and anyone she knows her. she specifically leaves bc she is looking for her mother, for where she came from, we also see a flashback of jane asking hopper who/where her mother is so this is an ongoing thing that has been plaguing jane.

when becky ives asks who she is, she replies "jane" and refers to terry ives as "mama" continually and when becky calls the ives house "home" jane repeats "home" like she also believes this could be home for her. so she clearly likes this being jane and being an ives, at least so far. however, jane ultimately leaves the ives home - but only bc becky calls the police asking for help and she gets spooked - and bc jane wants to know more abt her sister kali.

jane then meets kali and again, she introduces herself as "jane". this is despite the fact kali would actually know her better as eleven or say "el like eleven" perhaps, as kali only knows jane through the lab. jane literally has to show kali her number tattoo bc the name jane means nothing to kali. this time we know for certain that she must be using the name jane instead of el/eleven not for simplicity like you could assume at the ives house, but for another reason. a reason i personally believe is due to jane feeling a connection to this new name rather than her old one. when kali says "home" jane again repeats "home" bc she also believes this could be home for her. she feels kinship here with kali, as jane.

looking further in 2x07 (ik ppl hate it but idc) aka "the lost sister" we have the scene where kali tells jane to let herself feel her anger, something which takes jane a while as she's not used to allowing herself to feel these emotions fully. (the only other time before this we see jane as fully angry before this is when she's fighting with hopper, which considering she's being held against her will as a lab rat is WILD if you think abt it.) at face value, this scene is just abt anger, but its also abt emotions and jane's humanity in general imo. as jane, she's allowed herself both these things, but as "eleven" in the lab and even "el" with the boys she has not. even in later seasons, mike describes jane as a superhero not a person. "el" is not human like jane is.

speaking of this ep notice when jane leaves it's bc hawkins needs her. she doesn't want to leave kali, she doesn't want to stop being jane but does it bc it's her obligation. this is jane actively putting her powers before her own desires. i'm not saying jane didn't miss the ppl in hawkins bc we see that she does, but up until they were in danger, jane didn't miss them enough to put them above kali bc kali gives her something the ppl in hawkins can't/don't know to give her. understanding. her humanity. her name.

also the s3 scene with her and max shopping - max has to reiterate that jane should do what she wants and not what mike/hopper want. this shows me that jane is not putting herself first, she is putting others first and i truly believe that extends to her name.

i'm not saying the party are bad friends for calling her "el" bc they didn't see jane's arc in s2 and don't know everything that's going on with her. but doesn't the fact they don't know (from what we see) abt jane's mother which as i mentioned is a big part of jane's life that she cares deeply abt, a sign that jane isn't being open and honest with them abt who she is? that she isn't sharing that vulnerable, human side with them? that she is putting being a "superhero" before being human?

i hope this answered your question anon :) but tldr: i believe jane represents her humanity and el/eleven represents her being a "superhero".

[meatsex]

You ever think about if you really like red vox, or only like it because famous funny streamer man guy is making it, and if the lyrics are even made well? This isn’t directed at you specifically, this is just a thought I’ve had.

yeah, ive thought abt this kind of stuff, i dont think its unusual for ppl to think that when they listen to music made by a youtube funnyman (since theres many such cases)

i cannot say if they are a good band in a technical sense or not cuz im no musician, but i think i have enough proof to tell i like red vox because of what they make and not because vinny twitchman is the lead singer

ive tried listening to music by other youtubers before but almost all the time it falls flat unless its like a one time thing usually, but i (personally) feel like red vox has both incredibly rich music AND lyrics

there is a couple of songs i listen to i think "i feel like x word or y thing could have been connected a bit better here" but it feels solid and, what matters to me, actually impactful, a lot of these songs feel and sound so emotionally charged i kinda worry some times, and listening to them in a bad day might break me, i joked abt this before but i call another light "my second the downward spiral" just because of how heavy it can feel at times (especially the first and last songs)

it also helps that a lot of what music vinny likes and probably inspires him usually aligns with what i like too (talking heads, radiohead, nin, even elo which i didnt know he liked until a recent stream)

also i should mention this here which i funnily enough mentioned to a friend some days ago, but the reason i began to make so much vinny art in the first place its *because* i began listening to red vox, ive been a vs fan for years now, but when i draw him a lot of times i mostly think of him as "singer of red vox" than "twitch streamer vinesauce" (which doesnt mean i dont like making fanart of him as a streamer) + other more personal connections im too lazy to write about, which explains why im always making him look kinda melancholic or just more akin to the emotions his music evokes

sorry this ended up being so long but i cannot be asked about my interests and reply in a normal way

ultimately if you like something you just like it and theres nothing wrong with that even if its funny youtuber music, i think id rather support and get supported for the thing im making than for a brand name but thats on every different person to choose

[yj-98]

my brain is perpetually melting lately so im like not super comprehending it but i looove hearing ppl talk about what theyre into and i am just nodding along so enthusiastically when you talk about rdr2 . also take this as me asking about it as i said im nodding along

crow im sorry </3 honestly i understand 100% and i hope the brain fog lifts for you<3 but im happy its fun to hear about <3 thank you for nodding along and asking about it (in spirit) so let me lay the generic history + synopsis of both games because i have . sort of just been dropping context as i talk about two brothers and their horrible father (<3 and the good one)

anyways im about to be very autistic<3 buckle up

red dead redemption (2010) started off as a spiritual successor to a game called red dead revolver (2004) that rockstar bought after the game had been cancelled after it failed to follow thru with funding issues in 2000 (capcom. as in mega man capcom, was paying for a studio to make it, but funding dropped and and that studio closed so rockstar acquired the studio + eventually got the rights for rthe game). HOWEVER they wanted to do more w/ the concept

so john martson was born in 2010 w/ the first red dead game. youre introduced to a this former outlaw in 1911 who's family is being used for blackmail as he makes his way across a fictionalized version of the american south/west + mexico trying to track down his former friends because the US govt wants them dead. hes polite but no-nonsense and hes sarcastic sometimes and mentally unwell and also so kind. hes very funny honestly like rdr1 john my beloved. and he helps people along the way! he makes associates with all kinds of people. he deals with the people in his old gang (javier escuella and bill williamson), including his father figure dutch van der linde. hes described as his fathers greatest success and greatest downfall. hes returned to his wife and son and 'uncle' only for the US govt to raid their home, kill uncle, and it forces john to tell his wife and son to run while he makes a last stand, knowing that theyd stop at killing him. because ultimately these games are about redemption. and it almost succeeds, but his son grows up to avenge him

and its a fun game! its a wonderful story its really well done with interesting twists and turns and a HEARTBREAKING ending with this kid just. continuing that cycle. killing a government man puts a target on his head too. and rockstar couldve gone with a sort of . 1910s-1920s set sequel where you explore what the kids fate is. instead in 2018 we're given a prequel in the form of red dead redemption 2.

its 1899 and its the end of the golden age and the age of the "west" is honestly decades gone. dutch is clinging to an old life because he hates the US government, doesnt trust the law, etc. hes got a group of misfits including two men hes raised since they were preteens (arthur morgan + john marston) alongside his oldest friend (platonic life partner? sorry. theyre toxic old men* in love) hosea matthews.

(*old for 1899)

so arthur morgan is born in 2018. hes not mentioned once in rdr1 because he didnt exist! and rockstar gives themself the very hard job of making us LIKE a protagonist new to the story as a whole. and it works basically immediately. id argue its almost impossible to hate arthur when he feels so human. ive rarely like. played a game that beat for beat feels very much like reading a novel and i am. so honest when i say he feels human. they all do. but you hear his thoughts, you read his journal entries, you hear his comments to himself and his way of interacting with the world around you, let alone with other people. hes so endearing, if not a bit gruff and rough around the edges, and then he warms. especially around hosea, or in quiet moments with john or his friendship that blooms w/ a man named charles (i will not get into this.) or his kindness with sadie adler, a widow you meet in the prologue (shes sooo).

and then arthur starts dying. hes dying from the end of chapter 2. theres 6 chapters total + two epilogues w/ john. chapter 1 is essentially the prologue. youre given ONE whole chapter with arthur before It Happens. and hes declining. and you get hints. he starts coughing.

rdr2 is a story of arthur and the events that lead to rdr1 with a splintered family. you know the events of rdr1 will happen as absolutes: bill dies. javier dies. dutch dies. john and abigail (his wife) will die. jack, their son, who in rdr2 is maybe all of 5 years old, will one day kill a man. but that seems so distant

its a death march, its an avalanche, its a butterfly effect. its a car crash its a trainwreck. and youre a rubbernecker. you cant look away, you have to play his part in the play. the events that ultimately are the catalyst happen a month prior to the games opening: dutch picked up a man named micah bell, and micah is not a nice man. and he knows exactly how to play dutch like a fiddle. and dutch's ego is too big to know hes being played. they rob a ferry boat. it goes badly. people die. the pinkertons are after them all. they run into the mountains and almost die. dutch's ego is bruised and he Needs to correct it. they run into his old nemesis and they steal that guys plans to rob a train. you could say that this was the true catalyst for the events for the rest of the game but ultimately it doesnt matter. micah has his grip on dutch, and dutch just robbed one of thee wealthiest men in america, who has an ego that matches

meanwhile arthur is an attack dog, and he attacks the wrong target on orders he doesnt like. a weak man dying of tuberculosis. it infects arthur, unwittingly. arthur can quit these jobs. its doesnt matter. he will die in 6 months

rdr2 is a story of trying desperately to pump the breaks as more and more people die. its about hope and trying to save as many people as you can. its about people who fall through the cracks and who the 1% hate coming together and the reality of being used in a cult of personality. its about one man falling apart and taking 20+ people who looked to him like a shepherd, down with him. its about desperately clinging to the past as the future rockets forward. its about loyalty its about betrayal its about dying.

arthur is shown chapter after chapter as he gets weaker that his father is willing to let family die. that when dutch loses hosea in ANOTHER botched robbery he is not the same man. that he's willing to let both his sons die. and when arthur realizes his time left is short, hes desperate to make things right

arthur dies letting john escape. dutch and micah look down at him as hes dying and walk away. arthur is buried facing west. for the sun. john inherits his hat and journal. john tries to build that fateful home with abigail and jack. you spend the epilogue with him as he tries to make wrong puzzle pieces fit and shave down the parts of him that were his fathers son so that they can try to live normally. he succeeds. the epilogue lets you face micah and dutch as john and arthurs friends who survived (charles + sadie). you kill micah. he deserves it. dutch lets john live.

time does not stop. rdr1 looms ahead. you ignore this and play ranch simulator as john draws in arthurs journal and writes and scratches out words and draws hearts around his wifes name. you can find arthurs grave and sit with him.

i spent 1 month putting off arthurs death. i mourned him in real time when he died. games to CHANGE the brain chemistry

[most-canon-non-canon-ship-poll]

literally hoping they break up in the last season

Why Mileven is shit - a submission-based essay, part 2/3

Mileven - a currently canon het ship from the Stranger Things fandom between Michael (Mike) Wheeler and Jane (Eleven) Ives/Hopper/Byers/IDK

they NEED to breakup (AGAIN) in the final season let's start w their character arcs rn. el was born in a lab and was raised VERY strict to be a weapon and shit. she escapes and now her whole arc is finding herself and being who she is separate to what people tell her she is. mike comes from a lowkey conservative family with parents who are married only to fit into the normal, not because they love each other. his arc, similar to his sisters' struggle in earlier seasons, is to not fall into conformity just because you feel like you should. both of these stories line up with the main moral of the show: be who you are even if it isn't "normal" ot whatever now how does mileven go against this? mike, and a bunch of ppl around el, in the earlier seasons keeps telling el what she should do/be. even in the later seasons we see mike refering to el as a "superhero" (which she doesn't like). neither of them feel free to be themselves around the other (shown by el lying to mike and mike being WAY out of character around el, etc). mike literally can't tell el he loves her while not under pressure. mileven sometimes parallels mike's parents' and sta.cy (a failed conformity relationship) and other bad relationships ANYWAYS it also reallyyyy pains will byers (who's been canonically in love with mike for like years, and mike's best friend) to see this. also, milevens keep harassing will/mike shippers on anon even months after the last season. like they have a hate discord server just for it. anyways i love mike and el but ohhh my god there is still SO much i haven't mentioned about how bad they are together (and how bad shippers often are, sometimes being violently homophobic and calling bylers delusional and shit)

OOOH IT FUCKING SUCKS THEY ARE SOOOOOO BAD FOR EACH OTHER JESUS THEY DON'T COMMUNICATE LIKE EVER THEY ARE BOTH CLEARLY IN IT BECAUSE OF THE EXPECTATION OF A ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE THEY CAN'T CONFIDE IN EACH OTHER THEY DON'T SHARE ANY INTERESTS THEY'RE HAVING CONFLICT MORE OFTEN THAN NOT THANK *GOD* I AM UTTERLY CONVINCED THEY ARE HEADING FOR A CANONICAL PERMANENT BREAKUP. NOT TO MENTION THEY ARE BOTH GAY AS HELL TO ME. YOU SEEN THAT "THIS SHIP IS SO CANON AND IT'S A LESBIAN AND A GAY MAN" TWEET? YEAH. FUCK THIS STUPID FUCKING SHIP NOT TO MENTION THE SHIPPERS ARE FREQUENTLY OPENLY HOMOPHOBIC. UGHHHHHHH KILLING BITING (this is my fave btw)

they have no chemistry or buildup unlike the other st couples. they kissed season 1 right after she asked if he would be her brother. hes very obviously compensating for something. i think i gagged when they made out in season 3. speaking of. thats all they do. make out. they dont really have meaningful conversations. this also comes from the fact that when mike met her she was fresh out the lab that abused her for like 11 years. she was not socially ready to understand the bounds of a platonic relationship let alone a romantic one. anyway mileven break up s5 will happen i believe it. if nothing else. cross ur fingers gamers

the sheer homophobia and general toxicity that the fans of this ship create is absolutely insane when their perfect (read: mischaracterized) straight (read: homosexually-coded) couple is judged for having toxic or incompatible elements is insane. the only good romantic aspect between these two characters is in a cringefail "wow this really doesn't work at all" i-want-to-put-this-dynamic-under-a-microscope-and-study-it-because-it's-an-absolute-trainwreck" kind of way. el has been abused and cut off from society her whole life and at 12 years old she immediately gets together with this guy at whose earth shattered after his best friend went missing who then has surviors guilt after she almost does which is misconstrued as romantic rather than unhealthy obsession and trauma. and so on and so forth.. there's just so much wrong they lie to each other So Fucking Much despite truthfulness being very important to them and they ignore their friends to make out (which is filmed in a way that is meant to feel uncomfortable btw lmao) and el doesn't understand mike's trauma from bullying and he doesn't understand how she doesn't want to be built up into being a superhero etc etc. and it's just so increasingly bad I want to rub my temples just thinking about them. they're just so bad for each other and their relationship has done nothing but make them worse in general but for some reason their ship is viewed as fluffy or cute or whatever the hell. anyway mike is so heavily coded to be fucking gay and in love with his best friend (and el can be interpreted to be lesbian coded) and I just need to get them out of there amen

I'm gonna make a list bc the reasons are many: 1) their first casual interaction they get together but in the same conversation she asks him if she can be like a sister to him 2) all their "cute moments" are them making out in the 3rd season with still absolutely no chemistry 3) their only actual cute scene is them dancing at the snowball yet in the same scene they portray the same way two couples that are not romantic 4) mike becomes a terrible person when he's with eleven 5) eleven literally GOT OUT OF A LAB SHE WAS RAISED IN and this is the first guy she dated 6) she can't even say he's a good kisser 7) mike can't tell her that he loves her (bc he doesn't) and the only time he does he makes this whole ugly ass speech up about how she's his "superhero" even though she doesn't want to be seen only for her superpowers 8) in said speech, while listing the things that he loves about her, he only names her superpowers + he lies multiple times 9) EVEN AFTER SAID SPEECH she is still mad at him and won't talk to him (probably bc she saw right through his bs) 10) she spent a whole 6 months lying to him about all of her life 11) mike is clearly gay and is meant to be with his childhood best friend will 12) mike idolizes her and doesn't see her as an actual person 13) eleven needs to be her own person (ffs she just got out of a lab) 14) the ship sucks and even the authors and actors say so

they have NO chemistry. they kissed after one week of knowing each other when they were 12 and eleven didn't even know what a romantic relationship was at the time, given the fact that right before mike kisses her she says "will you be like my brother?". they spent the entirety of season 2 apart with mike calling el on his walkie and el watching romantic movies on the tv for a year (then will is in trouble and mike says 'fuck it' and goes full protective boyfriend mode but this isn't about byler so i digress) and start dating soon after they meet again even though they haven't had a SINGLE conversation and are barely friends. season 3 comes along and the writers do their utmost best to show us how incompatible they are. their makeout scenes are uncomfortable, they break up at the beginning of the season and neither one of them seems particularly bothered that their first relationship is over. in fact, the happiest we see el in the entire series is during the time they're broken up, when she gets close to max (who she actually has chemistry with, by the way) and finally experiences freedom, being a teenage girl and etc since mike had been "keeping her all to himself" for like, a year. aside from that, he doesn't go after her at all after she dumps his ass (literally) but when he and will have a fight, he bikes across town in the rain just to apologize, that boy is GAY. finally, the theme of season 4 is lies and once again, mike and el spend the season apart (once again, mike spends the season with WILL) and right before they part ways, they have a big fight about mike being unable to so much as WRITE "love, mike" on his letters to el, let alone say it, and he bullshits his way through it and refuses to say the actual reason until vol. 2, when he apparently "confesses" that he's afraid he'll lose her if he says it (okay, amigo, you're gonna lose your girlfriend who was literally begging you to say 'i love you' not even a week ago, aham, totally valid excuse). conclusion: they don't know each other and they don't act like themselves when they're together. mike hides his nerdy nature, el feels like she has to be the amazing superhero he's always viewed her as or else he'll lose interest and it just feels like they're both grasping at straws because this relationship has been dragged on for too long that they don't know how to break up permanently. they are afraid of losing each other, but not romantically, as mike was el's first semblance of family after escaping the lab and mike feels like it's his duty to protect and care for el. also, mike is gay. in other words, FREE THEM.

[wrongcaitlyn]

about your series dear reader, will we ever get to see Nico having a collab or featured song in the future... heehe... love your work btw

thank u for the ask!! and thank u for reading i’m so glad you like it <3 i’ve actually thought abt this quite a bit!! the thing with collabs, is that either i could use an irl celebrity, or i could make a character a celebrity and make them work with nico—so here are my thoughts on both options:

1) a real celebrity - i try to stay away from involving real life people in the fic, as in interactions, because i don’t know any of those people irl and i would hate to, like, mischaracterize someone or write positively abt someone who eventually gets revealed to be like a shitty person, yk? the most i’ve ever done, i think, is that one time i mentioned nico taking a picture with lorde - but even then, it wasn’t him talking abt her, it was just a picture that was posted. that, and the absurd amount of taylor swift name drops that i have, which i will never stop😭

basically, though i have considered it (my mind is literally CONSTANTLY imagine collabs of nico and other celebs/other songs), i literally have a playlist of them, i don’t think i would ever include it in the fic. simply bc of the concerns mentioned above :/

(however, i would like everyone to know that ive been imagining nico as a surprise guest on the rep tour, and having him featured on rep tv, for like- literally as long as ive had this au in my head. ill never write him collating with taylor (bc again idk i just feel strange writing abt real ppl) but in my head, it’s canon)

2) creating a new celeb - this one is hard, pretty much bc i’m… out of characters.

like, i still HAVE characters to use, but i already have plans for most of them and a majority of them aren’t actually part of the music industry. i could justify a collab between alex and nico bc she’s like the only music person i have written, but i also don’t wanna force that

if i ever do, which i doubt, bc i don’t have any plans to at the moment, it’ll be a pjo character, i just don’t have any idea of who that would be :/

oh and! last reason why i’m hesitant to add a collab - i feel like nico writing music is so engrained with him working with apollo as a producer, and their studio dynamic. obviously, it’s good to step out of your comfort zone, but i think that it’s also some sense of caution and comfort between them, that they’re the same people who will work on every nico di angelo song and album.

either way, i have seven albums outlined in total. the time span of greatest of luxuries goes from 2018-2024. that may be subject to change, but im feeling pretty confident abt it (it used to be 2028 btw😭) and anything PAST that time range is completely up to the reader!! i have lots of ideas of what could happen beyond that seventh album, and i have an idea (and a playlist) of the eighth album, but i can definitely imagine a lot of features in the future as he branches out. (and also him on rep tv. or ttpd. will update when ttpd comes out if i think there’s a specific song he’d slay as a feature on)

and lastly, for features. yes. he is on the hunger games tbosas soundtrack bc i say so‼️

(i imagine yellow flicker beat by lorde, even tho that was written for mockingjay, i just feel like it fits his vibe, but also, can’t catch me now works perfectly too)

[boyfhee]

moots as idols?

omg ask game :o it's been 55 years

these r mostly based on ppl ive talked quite a few times, but if ure a moot who isnt mentioned and would like to be, lmk and i'll gladly tell u which idol i associate u with

@ctrlemis : ART hmmm shuhua?? so so cool, like they're not afraid to say what's on their mind, and also v funny . also niki bc i think both of their energies match . MINGYU ure definitely the most stunning person to walk on earth

@amakumos : wonyoung / sunghoon / ningning, yun is so famous like she will always be famous . she's funny AND GOD SHE IS PRETTY TOO v nice tho!!!!! these four sit at the same table idk

@haerinz : rose FAE IS THE REASL FAMOUS MOOT HERE LIKE U WILL SEE HER EVERYWHERE IN EVERY OTHER SMAU . js like rose in in every pic like ??? mayb fae has powers to break ppl up....it's giving cupid's conflict yn (go read yun's works)

@maiverie : MOTHER LIKE KARINA i have nothing to say ab mai she can leave u speechless actually . but both her and karina r so...cool...and alien bc they're out of the world 😆☝️

@tyunni : atp i cant associate u with anyone other than riki BUT jay . no im not saying ure as smart as him but ure as cool as him . and jay is very cool like that's a fact from science . ALSO EUNCHAE idk u both r same atp

@jennaissantes : YUJIN AND YUNJIN three slayful girls together. i have no explanation here but lily just reminds me of yunjin and yunjin, AND IT'S VICE VERSA . guys do u know lily can sing...this was meant to be

@hoonvrs : the real heeseung moot everyone. if ure my hee moot ure my fav idk. gives very pretty girl vibes and i bet saint is one . heeseung bc i think she's good at a lot of things...idk it's just the energy, plus shes The comedian

@flwrshee : sunoo....lia....seungkwan, v cute and composed energy here (kwan is not composed i Know), like probably someone who can make u smile instantly, that's ri for u

@tnyhees : DINO hmm also minhee?? from gidle?? let's add jake too. v chaotic energy here, but again v cute i swear half of u r super cute. but chae is a rlly fun person to talk to, js like the ppl i mentioned above (me saying this as if i talk to those three on a daily basis)

@soobnny : SEUNGMIN AND JUNGWON WITH A HINT OF RYUJIN . first of all, sue, ure v cute and funny so seungmin and won card was guaranteed, and ryujin bc ure also super cool like omg be my friend :o ps. chaeryoung reminds me of u sm

@jaeyunverse : minghao and jay moot. the brain energy is over the roof here like yeah sage can help u write ur thesis 😍☝️ v intimidating at first and is equally insane, probably psychotic

@dokiyeom : aya ure so joshua and winter coded for me i cant even explain why but atp im convinced ure one of them. ik we havent talked much but from the limited conversations we've had so far, i can ure rlly welcoming and nice and sweet and id love to talk more w you

@heeliopheelia : JEONGHAN AND HEESEUNG MOOT fuck ure too sexy for this site what r u doing here? carly probably has three degrees and is pursuing a fourth one be honest bae this is how it is right? BC URE SO . COOL . LIKE COOL IN CAPS BOLD ITALICS . COOL . and ure funny . date when

[isabelguerra]

how long have u been part of the pnat fandom? any older fics/art you really liked from now inactive users? what horrors have u seen that u will never unsee

this is such a sweet ask i wasnt expecting actual responses omg!

ive been in the pnat fandom since 2015/2016 :) because of this arguably ALL my favorite older fic/art is by inactive users lol, some people are still kicking around though. my fave fics of all time are:

- I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream For Battle by whytho

- Copycat by onethreataningacronym

- parental guidance is not advised by soomin

- the many emotions of one johnny jhonny by littledragonprince

umm what horrors were there. oh okay so apparently there was fandom drama a few weeks ago over the prose stuff or writing or whatever idk i wasnt paying attention- anyway i saw people posting about it like it was some massive fallout. literally it was baby leagues. in 2018ish mid-ch5 when isabel and isaac had their big fight? the fandom was in ACTUAL SHAMBLES. the tag was full and i mean FUL of people writing me-length essays on why isaac was right or isabel was right. people tried arguing isabel was gaslighting isaac. one person in the fandom was a psych major and wrote an entire response on how that was quite literally not the definition of gaslighting. several people quit the fandom for this it was their catalyst. also bullymagnets and imaaxes hated each others guts. actually pnat shipping only really got popular around 2016/2017- a lot of the fandom didnt like shipping the kids! we just hung out being like ‘what if max and isabel bet one could shove more cookies in their mouth and then they both threw up’ ‘what if the activity club played dnd’ ‘what if they were wizards’ it was super chill. rarepairs were more common. ppl were a lot more focused and interested in just having fun and trying new things than if those things made sense or if they liked them or not. OH PARASONAS WERE HUGE everyone loved parasonas. wait this is supposed to be about the horrors. ummmm i mentioned it before but there was a lot of isaac/isabel fandrama. by which i mean isaac enjoyers who tended to relate to him without understanding why the writing treats him like it does, woobified the shit out of him and were super obnoxious about it. imo this still happens but not nearly as much as it did in 2014-2019. there was this one guy who like HARDCORE shipped ed and isabel and did it with unabashed gusto. these were the horrors

[sapphosdickandballs]

iiiii feel like ive been sending you too many asks as of late but i just am starting something to talk about. its due tomorrow so uhhh im gonna binge read it. ive got several things to read lol.

i didnt want to start another book right away cause id finished pride and prejudice and pittsburgh yesterday-ish after reading the majority during my shift- and OH YEAH.

i was so- stand offish at first about it because i thought it was so... goofy how the timetravel mechanic worked but literallyyyyy- stick it out. ugh it was so good???? i loved it. IT WAS GREAT. literally is everything. AND i think its a def rec. im not gonna spoil much but yeahhhhh lol.

is it better than she gets the girl? no not imo but like they're both rly good books.

i was listening to it during work and audrey had mentioned phoebe bridgers and my voice cracked bc i deadass gasped and shouted "PHOEBE???" making like two ppl look at me very confused 💀😭. "moon song" mention !!!! 🗣🔥🔥🔥🎶 . i love audrey for that. why am i always so shocked when someone mentions her in wlw books- anygays... proud!!! good choice. im in love with books that name drop music like that *looks at ols <3* i love punisher as an album sm ughh so that makes me 10x happier.

uhh- low key?? side note. after i sent you the previous ask abt books ghost LITERALLY sent me an epub of the falling in love montage without me asking or anything- like straight up just sent it to me 🫡. HAVEN'T READ IT YET BUT I HAVE AQUIRED IT.

oh and another thing.. i know what i said about not liking delilah green doesn't care and you taking it off of your tbr. i wanted to say- i think you should read it anyway. i would like to see you disagree with me not liking it or have a conversation about it and your thoughts. because- EVEN if i don't like it- i think you should have your own say on if you want or should read it. and like- i think itd be interesting to get your perspective or thoughts?? i wouldn't bump it high on the list or anything but i do think you should read it anyway. what i may not like, you could. i don't want you to miss out on that lol. hope that makes sense?? i can go into explanation on why i didn't like it then too. i went on a 15 min deep dive through voice notes with ghost after i finished it so 😭.

ghost managed to get me another wlw book i look forward to reading soon but i feel like this might be getting too long. i saw some art and i was sold. its like- enemies to lovers during the apocalypse?? it gives me tlou energy w the premise and thats speaking to me w my ellabs hyperfixation 🫡. obv not tlou but yeah. HAVEN'T EVEN PLAYED TLOU EITHER UGH BUT I WANT TO. anygays that tis all.

ifffff and when u finish kiss her once for me dooooo lmk. ik u said you had uni stuff and might be busy so obviously no rush or pressure but do lmk whenever that is!! i would love to infodump more but idk what else to say atm lol but i hope this isn't too annoying <3. i like sending u reading asks n stuff!!

you are not sending me too many at all! Your asks have been making my day every time I get them <3 and I’ll add that to my list! I love time travel stories so imma eat it up. I haven’t read in like 2 weeks 😭 and unis starting soon😭😭😭 but the second I can muster up reading energy I’ll finish kiss her once for me :]

[enlighten3d]

CARMELA LORE!!! I don’t know if she’s interesting to you but uhm mitski started playing so i must share her loreee (abuse is mentioned btw just letting you know just in case!)

So she grew up with her mum Carmela and her dad Daniel and she took both of their last names (carmela is Venezuelan)! And fun fact!! Her parents are teen parents, both of them being 16-17 (maria was turning 17). So the two had an ok relationship, what do you really expect from two teens who had to get married the moment they could thanks to their parents (having kids out of wedlock and stuff)/lh. Daniel definitely didn’t do much, since he’d been told by his dad (and mum) that it wasn’t his job to take care of his kid, like in the actual taking care not just the socialising and talking to the kid if that makes sense. BUT AS THE TWO GROW UP!! They start to get a relationship that I could only describe as Me and My Husband by Mitski (with hands thrown- if that also makes sense sjdgsj)

So over time, Maria ended up leaving to go the city since she wanted to study medicine! And she planned to take Carmela with her but stuff got in the way! (Daniel. He got in the way) So she ended up leaving anyways (OMG WAIT PARALLELS WITH JANETTE ok don’t mind me finding parallels with my oc lore) without Carmela- which Carmela did not understand at 11 years old so she thought her mum was just leaving. And then speeding forward to when Carmela is 16 (the time during her mum leaving and now was not good especially with her dad- she has a bruise across her neck if that indicates anything- uhm SORRY I JUST REALISED HOW DARK THAT IS UH)

In short her mum comes back to the town, her guilt also catching up to her, makes friends with Janette since they find they have a lot in common, Maria ends up in the cult even though Janette tries to stop her from joining. Maria becomes very heavily devoted (?) to the cult meaning when Janette needs to find someone that isn’t Oliver to do the cult ritual, she happily offers up her daughter Carmela! (who is reeling from her mum showing up and her mum trying to apologise) Also the reason Maria is so devoted to the cult is because they are very good at catering to the person’s needs (maria’s being somewhere to stay)

also the last time maria saw carmela, she was presenting as a boy (transssss) so thats another box for her (carmela) to unpack

YEAH. THATS THE RIVERA LUZARDO FAMILY!!! (carmela’s last name) SORRY THAT WAS A LOT AND A BUT HEAVIER THAN USUAL.again as always any questions are welcomeee

OOO CARMELA !!! trust me, shes interesting to me... and beyond that id be glad to hear the lore of ANY of you have, whether ive heard of them before or not

oo this is a long ask /pos... so much food. om nom nom

okay. woah. what do i even say to that

i would like to throw hands with daniel. hes next in line in the timmies parking lot right after adele. i would also lose this fight but id be trying a lot harder cause i hate him more (adele is objectively worse cause shes like.... committed at least one murder, but... adele is gay so its alright, she gets a pass /j).. fuck him. motherfucker..

carmelas mum is... i just feel bad for her, honestly. just really really bad. she ended up in a Situation, make the best decisions she thought she could, tried her best, is literally just Trying. i just feel bad for her man. shes just a person. she is quite literally the most normal person in this entire thing i think. shes just Trying, man. yes, trying ends her up in a cult, but she is Doing Her Best. like... how to put this... shes Real. adding her to the list of ppl who need a shock blanket

unless shes transphobic, in which case INTO THE PARKING LOT SHE GOESSSSSS

i love carmela, did you know that...

does she get no choice in being the next cult leader...

i hope shes alright... (shes not, is she)

[shoheiakagi]

I agree with you about the tags u left on that anon being rude to ciassu! Seriously thats just plain so fucking rude smh. Anyway u ended your tags with mention of shuhei x yata that op was going to write and it got me curious bc ive never thought of that pairing before lol so now im wondering if u have any other yata or shuhei ships u like/can think of? Sorry for the random ask i just want to see if theres any other ships i can add to my list other than chitose x yata lol

Hi!! Thank you for reaching out! And yeah, I feel like some ppl just like to send anon hate cause they’re bored? Like what is the end game here? You’re not gonna be the person with the last laugh cause your ask is either gonna be deleted or responded to in a post. And like, if you think there’s other writers who post the same type of fics, then why don’t you just focus on them? People need to realize that writing fics and drawing art is a skill, and that the creator puts in a lot of time and effort into perfecting it for the audience. I just don’t get why some ppl act mean online, when they don’t have that same persona irl?? Like why act like an internet thug??

Anyways!

Yes, I was also intrigued when I saw how op was working on a ShouheixYata fic! Like I know some bits and pieces of how they’d interact as friends, but as romantic partners? I’ve seen some EricxYata and and ChitosexYata, but never a ShouheixYata. I’m sooo curious cause Yata is terribly shy when it comes to romance, while Shouhei is charismatic and nicer than the other abc boys. Like is Shouhei going to be all flirty and try to charm him?? Does Yata develop a crush on Shouhei which he tries to hide but miserably fails at it??

And I do!! So to start off, I’ll be honest and say that I’m not really fond of romantic!banshou. Its weird cause i have other ships with similar dynamics, and i also adore both characters individually, but im not the biggest fan of them as a ship. I think its probably bc i dont like how its portrayed by the very few fans they have, and how a lot of things about shouhei, end up revolving around bandou’s inferiority complex towards him (which really sucks as a shouhei’s girl who wants to learn more about him).

But despite being in my y/n feels for shouhei, i do have a few ships for him! I don’t think it’s as obvious as it was when i first created this blog, but shouhei/eric is the closest to an otp i have for this fandom. Its probably bc theyre my top two faves, but i do think they have strong potential to be a sweet and interesting ship, and the few interactions they have are so cute 🥺 the fact that shouhei is the only person Eric refers to by their first name other than Anna 🥹🥹 (although i do think its probably cause everyone refers to shouhei by his first name lol. If im not wrong, i think eric refers to fuji by his last name despite being very close). I also do think they’d look really good together! Despite Eric being unkempt and not into fashion, he is objectively very good looking and i think his sharp and cool features are a good contrast against shouhei’s softer and warm features. I genuinely do think shouhei is the second person eric is comfortable with, after fujishima. I also ship shouhei with chitose and akiyama! I think i started shipping shouhei with chitose sometime last year and honestly? I think they’d be a fun and hot pair. I can’t really see them being them in a serious and committed relationship, but i do think they would probably hook up here and there (or even just be really good friends, since theyre pretty similar to each other except for some differences). Akiyama/Shouhei is always going to be that one opposites attract/enemies to lovers ship for me lol. I wish their fight scenes from s1 were longer, im so curious on what the dialogue would have been like.

Yata was my first ever fave character/crush when i first got into K back in 2012, but unfortunately that died out. But i do think ericxyata is such a cute and funny pair! I remember reading this really old fic on them in which yata learns english just so he can finally respond to eric’s taunts, only to have the story end with eric kissing him on the cheek 💞 i don’t remember being sold that quick on a ship like i did with that fic lmaoo. They’re like my second favorite pair, but theres sooooo little content on them :/ thats what i hate about k. Most content are on the popular/designated ships, you barely see anything on different pairings/dynamics. Yata and Kamamoto are seen as platonic for the most part, but i can see some potential for it to turn romantic! Kamamoto is a ride and die for yata. Like if theres ever a rare chance that yata decides to leave homra (unlikely, i know), i do feel like kamamoto would probably join him idk. the loyalty there is really strong. I think yata and chitose would be interesting since chitose is a playboy while yata is a virgin, but its probably gonna end with a nasty heartbreak on both sides 😬

[canayams-art]

it's meee, the qianqing anon✨ it certainly been a while since ive been in your asks jsjdjdjd the uni has been crazy and the finals were approaching so i had to force my focus on studying instead of screaming about my faves to anyone who was willing to listen :") but now that that's out of the way for a while now because the second semester has already started, im free to go back to my deranged brainrots sjejejejjeke

OH I ALMOST FORGOT very very late merry christmas (if you celebrated) and happy new years!! 🎉🎉

im rewatching the second season of tgcf at the moment and im going crazy over the small lqq moments i missed in my first watch wjejejek he's just such an amazing character and soo 😍 i love/hate that im now restarting the angst 😭😭

SOMEHOW I ALSO MISSED THE BRIEF BLURRY SHI WUDU CAMEO AND I WAS SCREAMING ABOUT IT FOR HALF AN HOUR TO MY FRIEND!! I CANT WAIT TO SEE HIM IN HIS FULL CORRUPTED GLORY IF WE EVER GET GHE BLACK WATER ARC ANIMATED!! he actually might be in my top three favorite characters from tgcf even if i don't talk about him nearly as much as i talk about mq

anyways. LQQ!! i know i already watched everything and i know that i know what's going to happen but man i am not prepared to go through that again! while i am EXTREMELY glad that we got to see him boil qr alive AND slice him in half, THE PAIN THE ANGUISH THE CONFLICT JWJWIEKEKKEJJE

i don't think i will be getting him out of my head anytime soon :")) im even more salty that he doesn't get a more important scenes later in the series :((

unfortunately ive been a bit brain-dead because of the most boring subjects in the world ughhh so i don't have any new lqq and mq thoughts :(( if you do pls share with me, im dying for every crumb of creativity available skkekekeke

also idk if i mentioned this in my last ask, but it makes me so happy that both you and your followers like these little lqq/mq rants 🥹 it makes me excited to share whatever new idea pops into my brain and know that there are somewhere ppl who get just as excited about them as i do

anyways, i hope you're doing well!! 😽😽

Welcome back qianqing anon!!!

I hope finals went well for you and that you’ve been able to catch your breath again. I also hope you enjoyed the holiday season!

Every time I see or think about donghua lqq I feel so grateful to the production team for depicting the way lqq feels and expresses himself so intensely. I know we all know this by now but his arc really is my favorite within the entire story,,, 🥹 It’s a shame we really only see him in the early chapters and the final ones— I genuinely think his story could easily be its own novel/extra.

Also where does shi wudu show up???! If it’s later in s2 then I haven’t spotted him yet cos I,,,,, still haven’t gotten around to finishing s2 (life got in the way of quality time in lqq land 😭). I feel you though— I find shi wudu interesting in such a way where I love his character but I also feel he 100% got what was coming to him LMAO. Blackwater arc is gonna be so wild to see.

But!! Back to qianqing lol. I was thinking earlier about the fact that lqq answers any personal communication array regardless of who is contacting him. Meanwhile mq haunts the public communication array but gives this vibe that not a lot of people have access to his personal array,,,, made me think about how mq seems like the type who always reaches out to lqq privately, knowing that lqq will always answer, but refuses to give his password in return. Lqq probably asked him once and mq probably told him something like “It’s pointless when I know you’ll answer me no matter what.” (Bonus: maybe mq finally decides to hand his password over when lqq ends up going down to the mortal realm to seek his revenge— like it’s mq’s way of telling lqq that he’s concerned but without flat out saying he’s concerned for lqq LOL)

Anyway! Please always feel free to slide into the inbox. I may be slow to reply to these but they really do make my day. The qianqing brainrot never sleeps 😂