#STOP I AM CRYING T T | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

calicos-clones · 8 months ago

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I don’t think people realize how freaked out fanfic readers get when their favorite author(s) doesn’t update their ongoing schedule ON TIME.

And it’s not cause we want the chapter…it’s cause we’re so fucking worried about the Author.

Like— OMG ARE YOU OKAY? YOU’VE BEEN GIVING US THE TRAGIC UPDATES OF YOUR LIFE IN THE NOTES THE PAST 10 CHAPTERS?! WHY STOP? ARE YOU DEAD? DID YOU GET STUCK IN THE WALL LIKE YOUR CAT?? HAVE YOU EATEN?? HAS YOUR BRAIN EXPLODED??

Readers no longer care about the story when they don’t get their usual update. We panic and flag S.O.S as we track down our wayward author who has been both blessed by the universe with a creative mind and cursed all the same with the worst luck.

So any authors who are reading this please understand— when we comment “hey are you okay?” in your comments. No, we are not asking about the chapter.

We are legitimately concerned for your wellbeing. Do not force yourself to shit out a chapter just to appease other ppl when you yourself are not in the mental state to enjoy it or even write it to begin with.

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF DAMMIT

#yes this is targeted #I hope authors read this and understand that we all care abt you #ao3 fanfic #ao3 #ao3 memes #I am frightened by how nonchalantly authors drop the most tragic life changing experiences in the notes and are like #“it might be a day or two late but don’t worry!#wdym don’t worry?#I’m worrying for YOU!#eat something #drink water #cry or something idk #stop writing to runaway from your issues #take care of yourself dammit T^T #don’t let assholes run an author’s comment section #support your authors #they will write when they can #you can wait as long as they need #burnout is very real and very draining #DO NOT pressure authors #appreciate what they’ve done for you so far #authors love to create— they will always give you more if you make sure you water them #with love #and understanding #and maybe some actual water cause who knows when they showered #memes #fanfic #fanfic meme #author awareness

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dossei-dossei · 1 month ago

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Jewel de Paris!! / Ayakaze Sakina Sayonara Show

#takarazuka #yukigumi #ayakaze sakina #asami jun #sakiaasa #jewel de paris #god bless whoever decided to air the sfwb adlib i owe u my life #praying one day they air maeraku on sky stage so i can make a gif of that one too #(aasa made a heart at saki and saki made one back)#i posted the jupari gifs before but they fit w the sfwb gif so #idk if i am happy with these colours but i wanted to post it (sfwb gif)#might make some more gifs from the digest but maybe not #who knows #this was the important one (to me)#(though so is aasa handing the flowers over to saki so)#also thank you raku cameraman for all the closeups of aasa/sakiaasa i feel very personally targeted #im not sure if it was an intentional callback or just. them being them. but it was the first thing i thought watching the stream so #very very cute that aasa was the one to initiate it this time #anyway shutting the fuck up before i start crying over sakiaasa in the tags bc no one asked and if i start i will not stop and i will hit t #e tag limit #anyway #shout out to neiro suwa and kasekyou for being very very cute in the back #takarazuka revue #my gifs

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quarks-pussy · 1 year ago

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So I know we here at Startrekfandom love that "came back wrong but from the pov of the wrong" thing and apply it to many different characters and canon situations and I am far from trying to complain about it (I'm "came out wrong" trope myself so I was always gonna obsess over it) but having recently watched a very important episode (you'll know which one) for the first time I think there's a character who hits both tropes mentioned but llike, intertwined, opposite and subverted, and whom I wanna talk about.

Julian Bashir.

From his parents' pov he's "came out wrong but we got him help and he came back better" while from his own pov it's "came out 'insufficient', was destroyed for it, came back wrong and only later slowly came to terms with his new self tho never the process (justifiably so)" and it's heartbreaking because in a way, he's right! Jules Bashir died! His parents had an intellectually disabled child and decided to eugenics him! Julian is not the person he used to be and while I do love the person he is now, that doesn't bring back who he was! Part of me wishes we could've gotten to see Jules at least once and part of me hopes we never do because my heart would shatter.

This isn't a good comparison but nonetheless one I can't help drawing: it's giving similar vibes to anti-vaxxers. "I'd rather risk having a child who is dead than one who's autistic". Obviously this doesn't map over since Julian is still autistic and the procedure his parents subjected him to specifically targeted his intellectual disability and if any folks with id wanna comment on this I definitely recommend you listen to them over me, but it's a similarity I, as an autistic who has encountered anti-vaxxers again and again, can't help but point out. "Give me a normal child or give them death."

This may have been written about already but there needs to be stories about teenage Julian (after finding out and rediscovering who he was) practicing some good ol' recognition of the self through media. I need to hear about how he would encounter a story about someone who came back wrong (I'm gonna assume there's plenty of "wrong" pov stories floating around by the 24th century) and absolutely weep. I need to see Julian mourning Jules, taking years and years to process his feelings, experiencing guilt about how he, the imposter, didn't deserve to live Jules' life.

Came back wrong from the returned's pov but it wasn't an accident. It was done to you deliberately by the people who claim to love you. And now you are here, piloting the corpse of your predecessor.

Jules Bashir is dead. Long live Julian Bashir.

#i've called julian jules before simply as a normal nickname but i don't think i ever will again. not after this #and knowing that if it had been possible i would have probably gone the way jules did. knowing that at his age i would have gone willingly.#fuck dude i am literally actually crying literal tears irl right now this is not a joke #fuck!!!!!#julian bashir #jules bashir #doctor bashir i presume #came back wrong #star trek deep space nine #HE WAS SIX YEARS OLD!! HE WAS SIX YEARS OLD AND THEY KILLED HIM!!!!#i cannot stop crying i am literally crying and like not even just a little #i cannot... poor julian how the FUCK do you ever come to terms with something like that #and like... julian remembers. he has most if not all of jules' memories and also knows he was murdered simply for not being julian #like how did he cope #(im about to go off on a tangent that will contain censored names for the sake of not clogging those tags if you dont know who i mean hmu)#like this is literally the thing that fucked up j*ran so bad he went on a murder spree isn't it #he remembers the one who came before who was killed. very different circumstances of course esp since tr*ll are expected to replace one ano #another but he remembers this person he remembers BEING this person who was young and simply enjoying life and who died a sudden death and #he remembers the experience of that death as well and how it lead to his own creation. it's not remotely similar ofc but considering that #the only time we see t*rias in alpha canon is in julian's body... i need to lie down for a moment.#and jor*n couldn't cope! he couldn't! it was far too much and the weird thing is right now in this moment i GET it y'know?? like that's #so horrific. and i haven't watched any jo*an episode besides facets yet but do you think. do you think j*dzia told julian about all this an #he nodded along and kept composure and then when he was alone he broke down crying? like julian you're doing SO well ily you're coping and #you shouldn't have to obviously but you do nonetheless!! do you think julian still has something from jules? like i've heard there's a tedd #but i mean jules prolly didn't keep a diary he was a six year old with an intellectual disability it's pretty unlikely he could write but #does julian have drawings made by jules? i'd like to think so but honestly his parents probably threw them out. like they also moved so #sorry i'm just. many thoughts head full. ive stopped crying now but who knows for how long. also i'll have to tag this with my original tag #maybe i should've picked something less silly for when i make serious posts but like what am i gonna change my url as well? don't think so #original posts fresh from quark's pussy #and thats the tag limit folks it's been fun. i had to delete two other tags but my god. anyway. thinking about jules bashir forever & cryin

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kirkwallguy · 2 months ago

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actually i said it in the tags but it isn't enough... if you like da2 and elder scrolls games you need to play enderal. insane game for insane people.

#don't research the plot too much bc the twists are really good. i remember one part made my heart stop the first time i played and #it WASN'T even a twist.#the combat is fine it's just skyrim. the voice acting can be hit or miss #but god the narrative and writing is insane for what is essentially a skyrim mod. i am on t my tear ducts are gone and i DID cry #the first time i finished it. do you know how hard it is to make me cry at a game

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sowearecleariamhere · 10 days ago

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When I looked at the soundtrack before, pre act 2, I saw "Isha's song". I thought, why would Isha get a song? And a song that sounds like that? There had to be something I was missing or that was to come.

Now, post act 2:

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jasperyourmutt · 2 months ago

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Thank fucking god for doctors who give a shit about your health. I just met my new doctor who is going to be prescribing my T and I feel so relieved to have someone who actually CARES

#to make a long story short. right after I logged off tumblr in may my endo wrote my T script wrong and the pharmacy couldn’t fill it #I spent a month fighting with her office and my pharmacies (2 of them because my doctor told me it was the pharmacies fault)#the entire month of June I was not able to give myself any t injections and I got my period on my birthday #I made 1 phone call to my primary care doctor on the verge of losing my mind and she was able to get my my T within 3 hours #and now the doctor that trains her and her staff on gender affirming care is now my doctor #my old endo that wrote the script wrong called me a liar and her office treated me like shit. I hope they burn in hell #they upped my T dosage and then I had none for a month. you can not begin to understand the emotional whiplash I was having #I really truly do not understand how I survived. there would be days I would be crying and having panic attacks non stop #and now I have a doctor who I can talk to day or night. and not have to worry about a thing #yapping #anyways. I love you my new doctor. I am finally safe #jasperbarks

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jrueships · 23 days ago

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WHOEVER THE FUCK IS RECOMMENDING MED PPL TO GO INTO RADIOLOGY JUST CUS IF THE MONEY, IM GONNA FUCKING gET YOU

#first i had ai dictacting schedules and now the radiologists just thought there was a AHHGGRHHH #YES. YES U CAN MAKE MONEY GOING INTO RADIOLOGY. BUT DO NO T. JU ST. GO INTO IT. for the MONEY #MEDICINE IS FKING PAIN BCS BUSINESS IS A PAIN & PPL ARE IN PAIN & PPL ARE A PAIN #like it is Very. ppl orientated it's FKING MEDICINE and even if ure a vet or whatever theres obvs usually humans attached fo animals #so like u might not always be dealing with the ppl but ur coworkers who are also being directly accounting #for the ppl SURE AS HELL DO #like yea ppl die all the time but ure telling me u dont gaf when u couldve done something to stop a LIFE #a HUMAN LIFE that was DEPENDING ON U just doing a like tiny action in the grand scheme of ur things #but ends up a major life changer to them even if they dont always have the knowledge to recognize it #and u let them die bcs of the money #i cant fcking STANDDDDDD IT ohmy GAWD.#also like radiology is not all that hunky dory like radiactive is part of the fking name like #UGHHHH LIKE IM SUPPOSED TO BE SCOLDING MY PTS WHY TF AM I SCOLDING MFS FOR MY PTS #anyways yea tho totally just join medicine for the money it's tofally not a massive damage to u n society #but also . fuck society for making ppl feel like they only have this choice or it's starvation bcs thats also so fking real fuc that #but bro at least try not to fuck ppl over once u gain a position just bcs u happened to be in a bad mood today like #medicine is Literally. horror. it's not that 'i watch pimple popping videos haha i can handle it' horror . it's literally.#the horror of treating humans like humans while never allowed to be one urself kind of horror #it's watching a little girl crying and a big bulky father weeping like a small child bcs his wife died #&then u step out the room and a pt throws his poop at u bcs he keeps lying to u abt not having any alcohol &wants to go home but has no ride #wants a million opiods and has been absolutely wailing at ur staff and if he leaves ama it docks u so now u gotta #peruse a bunch of legal documents to try and figure out a loophole on how to get him outta here while also dealing with 60 other pts #on the brink of death or intensely septic and the whole time ure trying to save them u got bitches screaming in ur ear abt the #north carolina fluid shortage like btch fuck that im giving this kid the shit they need to survive fuck off #especially funny bcs theres fluids available but we refuse to buy them bcs theyre for a higher price than our og supplier like ok #anyways #love my life

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kindheartedgummybears · 11 months ago

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you wanna know what??

I am

TIRED

of overmasculinized werewolves!!!!

I WANNA SEE A

WEREWOLF

WALKING AROUND IN A CVNTY LITTLE OUTFIT!!! WALKING THE STREETS!!!! DISEMBOWELING CREATURES!!!!

I WANNA SEE WEREWOLVES COVERED IN BLOOD AND GORE WHILE WEARING A SHORT SKIRT AND CROPTOP WITH HELLO KITTY ON IT!!!!

I WANNA SEE A WEREWOLF WALKING AROUND IN COTTAGE AND FAIRY AND PRINCESS CORE OUTFITS!!!!!! WITH A DEAD MANGLED RABBIT IN ITS MOUTH!!!!

AND MAKE THE WEREWOLF

D I S G U S T I N G ! ! !

#i am TIRED of seeing all these manly man werewolves that are all copy and paste white boys #I am TIRED of seeing all these woman werewolves being butch and masculine(also mostly white) or submissive!!!#I WANNA SEE SOME PLUS-SIZE WEREWOLVES I WANNA SEE SOME BLACK ASIAN LATINO MIDDLE EASTERN NON WHITE WEREWOLVES!!!!! THAT ARNT F3TIZIED!!!!!#I WANNA SEE A G I R L WEREWOLF THATS INTO “G I R L Y” THINGS!!!!! LET THE WEREWOLF BE A SLVT!!!!!#LET THE WEREWOLF BE IN THE TRADITIONAL CLOTHING OF ITS CULTURE!!!!#AND RIP AND TEAR AND MAUL AND CRY IN THE MORNING AFTER DOING ALL OF IT!!!! RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#no but fr can we werewolf fans like. actually sit down and reflect on the inherent misogyny of werewolves??? ESPECIALLY IN MEDIA #like. almost EVERY. SINGLE. WEREWOLF. in movies and shows and stuff are always a buff white man with anger and trust issues #and on the rare occasion that there *is* a woman werewolf shes always either over masculine or “weaker” than the “stronger alpha male” were #olf and only seen as a mate. AND shes always “calmer” and “maternal” and “calms the alpha male down🥺🥺”.AND she never has an actually good #werewolf form its always either wolf tail and ears or full wolf. or if it *is* actually a decent werewolf her transformation is offscreen.#like whyyyyyyyyyyyyy are people so scared to make women go ape shit?????? werewolves are NOT pretty creatures!!!! STOP MAKING THEM PRETTY!!#(lmao jk we know why they're so scared hashtag male gaze)#like yes. werewolves ARE pretty but not in the “dog show 30k$ poodle” kind of way i see some people making them(not that that's bad tho)#AND ALSO LIKE. ARE WE JUST GOING TO PRETEND WEREWOLVES LITERALLY WEREN'T MADE FOR WOMEN AND MINORITIES???#like. once a month someone turns into a raging bloodthirsty unstoppable beast driven by the moon and instincts with an insatiable hunger an #need to hide away from people due to them wanting to kill you or fearing you simply because you're a werewolf. they don't know you. they ju #t see you as a creature that might hurt them. constantly being hunted down to be killed simply for existing.#WHAT PART OF THAT SCREAMS: “ah yes. White man.”#IK theres going be people(men and pick mes) that see this post and think “this bitch is overreacting” and tbh idc.the girls who get it get #the girls who dont dont.#anyways shout out to Ginger Snaps trick or treat and every other piece of media or fan piece with disgusting non-f3tiszied woman/poc werewo #i love yall #*smooch smooch*#Werewolves #Werewolf #Lycanthrope #Lycanthropy #Werewolf AU #Yeah. Im tagging that too. I see yall.

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talkorsomething · 5 months ago

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I have Got to get more transgender

#100% секретный дневник левы НЕ ЧИТАЙ #transmasc #trans ftm #transgender #i like 2 say i'm very trans already but unforch i am Not Really. mostly boring ftm Guy Ever #so tempted to cut my hair again but my sense of what i look like is already so fuzzy i dont think it'd help..#want to dye my hair anyways. at this point i'd take whatever color i can get if not purple LOL #it's almost everything i could want and yet ... still me. still the same life. stuck.#soooo high functioning like you wouldnt believe EXCEPT istg i need an emotional support human who will guide me through tasks #such as 'pay with your Moneys Card at the Store'#or... idk that's it really. maybe go grocery shopping without feeling like i'm not meant to be there also #or like. exist in general maybe #reasons why not emotional support Animal: creature cannot understand capitalism. and also is not as necessary as a service dog specifically #idk! every time i come on here i fall apart (in text) and then pull myself back together for another day of ... this i guess.#i'm not even having like crying breakdowns or anything to go along with it i'm just held inside this shell of a body. typing away again #i'm soso tempted to make things worse. progress wouldn't matter anymore... at least maybe it would feel real that i'm like this #i wish my face fit on my body right. and also that i did not look quite so much like a vaguely gnc lesbian #like at LEAST let me look butch as hell but no. curse of sad hair & uncertainty #miss my little mullety thing from that brief period in october... miss my short hair from back in 2017 ...#just dont feel satisfied with what i am now. in general.#top surgery is literally Within my reach but i'm not sure about cost and i need to wait because of doing guard now......#my list of do i want t i kept for the past month turned out to be a bunch of maybes #partially cause i got sick. partially cause it stopped being shark week and i forgot about it #as always happens...#still unsure in my new(er) name. only heard it once #didn't feel the same way as with my old one? but idk. just don't know.#missing guard also but feeling conflicted about not having time for other hobbies...#since winter season is over i've had so much time to play guitar! that's insane! mostly cause i stopped playing for unrelated reasons...#just tired again. wonder if i need more sleep than what i always get. kind of restless.#there's nothing else to say i guess. just wish i could be a person the way everyone else seems to be.

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crossbackpoke-check · 4 months ago

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about to be sooo nosy so. my apologies. but. morgan frost? girlfriend? do share (or don’t! again this is so nosy i’m sorry)

for legal purposes i can neither confirm nor deny anything about morgan and his girlfriend but afaik i think he’s single right now? at one point (within the past four years 😭) he did for sure have a girlfriend and that is the extent of my wag knowledge

#anon PLEASE i am the nosiest person in the world i understand i want to know everything. ever. however #because i have no evidence and don’t want to spread unfounded rumors i will state for the jury i am not a gossip blog #& anything i say should be taken with a grain of salt. or a vsco deep dive & also maybe a dig into the flyers media archives. wrt UNfounded #but i will gossip in your dms because it’s a vital method of communication and important for community building.#also i’m like 95% sure i just osmosed the fact that morgan and his girlfriend broke up sometime earlier in the hockey season from someone #else (probably flyerskay) and accepted it at face value like absolutely i’d trust kay with my life. she would never lie to me and therefore #i can’t be lying to you. i can’t remember morgan’s gf’s name tho but i can like. vividly remember her artsy possessive vsco photos 😭 help #that man posts more about tom petty than he does anyone else in his life besides joel so really how would we know if hes posted her less #the answer is we wouldn’t and i want to say her name is katie SO bad but i know that’s tyson’s gf it’s like. victoria or stacie or somethin #& i want to see if SHE deleted all her vsco pictures of him bc that’s how we’d know they broke up. frosty stop following so many girls #i want to try and find her and see (she’s a model and she was public and had her vsco linked so all of this is public info btw.)#ANON I LOVE YOU SO MUCH AND YOU HAVE NO IDEA OANDJRIWNDHOWHDB IT IS 1:38 AM AND I HAVE JUST MANAGED. OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD ANON HOLD ON #BUCKLE YOURSELF THE FUCK IN FOR AN ANSWER YOU DID NOT ASK FOR BECAUSE THIS IS A R I D E AND I NEED TO YELL ABOUT IT I CAN’T MY GOD I CANNOT #B R E A T H E i’m about to start crying again but the backstory is that. i have had a fic that i have been working on for literal years.#my version history says March 15 2021 and it started in my notes app about 3000 words before that and it’s based off of a tweet i thought #calla had quoted and just said ‘Joel’ about but in my notes i never #saved the actual tweet and many times throughout the years i have gone back and advanced searched every version of joel and joelle and bee #and behavior on calla’s blog that i could possibly think of and just assumed like. it must’ve gotten deleted or the account suspended and i #could never remember the wording well enough to just google it but believe me i tried and put in every variation. never found it in 4 years #i try periodically. fast forward to about twenty minutes ago i am looking through kay’s twitter and searching vsco because i SWEAR she has #the picture of frosty’s gf’s fingernail marks in the back of frosty’s shoulders i am talking about / I can’t find her vsco linked anywhere #but i’m like ok. search up a couple other things and think about who might have it and on a WHIM look up vsco in ash notthequiettype’s acct #no results okay whatever i think about what else could maybe pull it up for me so I have SOMETHING for you. I search frosty. I scroll. GUES #WHAT I FUCKING FIND FROM NOVEMBER 13TH 2020 it is THE FANTASTIC TWEET THAT SPAWNED 16K OF NOTES & FIC & A SPREADSHEET OF JOEL’S CLASSES #AND I NEVER WOULD’VE FOUND IT AGAIN IF NOT FOR THIS!!! LOSING IT!!! by it I mean my mind and my sleep schedule!!! it’s 2AM now good night!!#liv in the replies #morgan frost #philadephia flyers

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perilegs · 4 months ago

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i needed some coworkers to hear keekki's meow and the only place i had a video of it on hand was tumblr so i whipped out my keekki post and played it and one person saw my screen and i forgot to click it so it wouldnt display my username in the video player and. hm. now im scared.

#almost immediately after this i got dropped off to a parking lot where my car was and people possibly saw my fudanshi sticker #and i had a backpack and aa bag and hat to put the bag on the ground while i got my keys from my backpacl and i fumbled bc i ger #SO nervous when i think ppl may be watching what im doing so while i was trying to unlock my car i knocked my bag over and a shirt and a ba #of chips spilled out and from the bag of chips a single chip and i picked it up in my hand bc i have a trash bag in my car for situations #like this but it might have looked as if i picked the chip up to eat it. from the ground. with plenty of seagull shit around #anyways sometimes i forget i act like a cringefail loser (=am mildly clumsy and get flustered and/or nervous v easy)#and then i have a cringefail moment #well. i have already experienced my most loser moment. it was when i was tired and for some godforsaken reason bought meatballs from a stor #those rlly shitty ones in the ready meals section. they were in a plastic bag. and i was at a train station sitting on some stairs and #eating them. cold. straight out the bag. one fell and i started crying.#its been a while since that though #now that im on t i cant cry easily so its fine #i just think i need to stop seeming as if i were a bit of a pathetic loser gdvfjdbdksm #im sure i had a point somewhere in here but i need to ramble about moments im sure everyone has had #leevi talks

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deus-ex-mona · 1 year ago

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youtube

it’s that time of week again…

#and M A N today’s getsuyoubi was extra yuuutsu #first i dropped 2 cup things filled with water. cool. a mess was made. nice.#t h e n my workstation shook by itself and one of the cup things toppled down again. only it was filled with (diluted) acid this time!!!!#i wish it fell onto me bc at l e a s t my bad day would’ve ended with just an acid burn instead of getting worse #bc *then* we found out that we were near-out of [insert reagent here] that we need to run blanks for [test thing] yay!!!!! joy!!!!!!!!!#so we had to use a substitute solvent (sadge)#if only it ended there aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa #i left work on time -> waited forever for the delayed bus -> decided to get some coffee or sth as a pick me up t h e n…#the coffee place happened to run out of single bags so i decided to put it into my bag instead (mistake)…#…a n d dropped my phone while trying to prop the stupid drink upright so it wouldn’t spill.#unfortunately for me though... some rando picked up my phone some time within the 30s-1 min wherein i realised that my phone was gone…#…and took it home with him instead of handing it to the customer service counter at the nearby train stations. ha.#called my phone a couple of times with the phone from a customer service counter but he~~ didn’t~~ pick up~~~~~~~~~#and so. long story short. i had to leave the house an extra time to go to this guy’s place to pick up my bb (read: my phone)#bc the dude~~~ can’t~~~~ speak~~~ english~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ so he didn’t understand me when i told him my location~~~~~~~#and now it’s almost 8.30 in the pm. im waiting for the delayed bus to go home from wherever tf i am now. and i haven’t eaten all day :))))#(aside from a small cake thing but it’s negligible tbh)#aND HOLY FK I HATE THIS I FLAGGED DOWN THE BUS BUT IT SKIPPED THE STOP HELP ME I JUST WANNA GO HOME #.am i allowed to cry yet. i. just. i just wanna eat my dinner.#…come to think of it my drink ended up spilling in my bag while i was hunting for my phone. so. there’s that to clean up ig.#ughhhhhhhhh i wish that guy had just left my phone where he found it. s o b s #so yeah. if you read this i hope you had a good monday at least…#this truly is my ✨t r a g i c c o m e d y✨

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the-alan-price-combo · 8 months ago

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...boop?? I guess?? teehee... them

#i am allergic to trends especially apr*l f*ols related things b u t ..... yeah this is pretty good #also IT'S ALAN'S BIRTHDAY MONTH NOW. EEEEEEEEEEEEE.......... TIME TO BE NORMAL.#gosh i can't stop crying over them.... updating my essay really soon with some Very Important Info 👀#alan price #eric burdon #the animals #60s rock #british invasion #the girl can't help it

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qumiiiquinnquin · 11 months ago

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why do I have really detrimental thoughts

#vent #telling myself to take antidepressants so i can stop being like this but oh wait! i dont HAVE ANY!!!!#im so frustrated #i need to call his office but does he even remember me? i havent had an appointment since last april #i hate these intrusive thoughts #i know thats not how any of it works #why cant i be #im so frustrated to the point of wanting to cry what is wrong with me #why am i even frustrated t all

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fuwaprince · 1 year ago

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I really want cup noodles but it's too cold to walk to the store and I am bleeding for reasons I cannot explain again. Emotionally I'm pretty good. Physically I'm not

#i need to warm up and relax to YouTube vids #my ex was being an asshole in class again bc she's having a bad day or something .-. and i was not going to be complicit with her dumb shit #my friends let me know that she bothered them about me again and I'm sure it was just to relay the message that she will choose terrorism #i will not be threatened into getting back into a bad relationship #i will leave class and enjoy the rest of my beautiful day 💗 it's okay if I'm not physically well #emotionally i am free from terror and it's impossible to be sad when i laugh at my own crude jokes #also my classmates are looking out for me which is super nice 🥺 they make me feel safe coming to campus #how can i be bothered that I'm bleeding when my friends make me feel like I have a place of belonging with them #also listen here 'hun'.... swift had one thing right .... we are NEVER ever getting back together -___-#you know it's true and just accept it #also fuck t swift #i still cry to white horse but that's my character flaw #💗💗💗 if that makes me less dateable then GOOD stop asking me to marry you

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beauty-grace-outer-space · 1 year ago

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Didn't even make it til 10AM without sobbing at my desk this time.

#overachiever to the max #less than an hour at work? Time to SOB!#I fucked up an interaction with my doctor cuz they can't read and I can't pretend to be a sane normal human for two seconds #so I said #Hey the anti anxiety med you prescribed works really well and I do still have several left #but I don't want to be anxious about #like rationing them for fear that I won't get more so can we set it up as a recurring prescription like we had discussed?#and she said “I'm so glad it's working well for you! Happy holidays!”#so I said “Thank you. So if I need a refill do I call or?”#and she said “You can always call our office!”#so I called the office to clarify and immediately burst into tears because I am a disaster who hasn't stopped crying for three days #and they were like “do you... want a refill?” and I blubbered something about just needing to know that I CAN get a refill if/when I need t #so they are going to “Check with the doctor and let me know”#which means that she's going to find out I'm crazy #which probably means she won't give me these again #which means I have 12 to make last for the rest of time because I'm a fucking idiot and broke one trying to half it and it just shattered #because I can't even take pills correctly apparently #also found out yesterday I don't even take BATHS correctly like #jesus christ #can I please for the love of god have one single aspect of my life where I do something right #and am not just a fucked up disaster mess

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