#SORRY I WROTE A NOVEL THIS IS JUST REALLY IMPORTANT TO ME

[mehkers]

Just another date on a calendar

Back with another hc~!

This time it’s the bro’s and a Mc who’s celebrating a deceased person’s birthday whom they were close with.

Except that Mc is literally me.

It’s mostly self indulgent, since today’s my grandpa’s birthday.

Warnings: talk of death, birthday celebration of a deceased person, trigger warning for anyone who’s having a really tough time healing from the death of someone close to you? Idk, gn!reader, not proofread

I originally wrote this in second person but switched to first person, so if you find some odd words that may be it.

It ain’t too heavy; angst with comfort

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Beel was quite happy today. I took them all out on an impromptu trip to the human realm (after a lot of begging), and am treating them to dinner.

It was a nice restaurant. Not too fancy, but not fast food casual. I was sitting outside in the patio, enjoying the warm night with the brothers and the delicious food. The ambiance was quite calm, everyone settling into an idle chatter has they munched on the appetizers.

“…ey. Hey. Hey!” Mammon waved his hand in front of my face and pulled my attention back to him. I accidentally zoned out for the trillionth time this night, and now there is 7 very concerned demons looking at me.

“Sorry, don’t mind me. All is well!” I tried to reassure them, hoping it might quell their concerns. It did not.

“That’s the 10th time you’ve said something of the same variant, after zoning out .” Satan spoke up, his brows furrowed as if he’s trying to figure out the killer in a detective novel. I could feel those electric green eyes piercing through my mind and body, trying to decipher what’s actually going on.

Asmo let out an dramatically sad exhale, and wrapped his arms around my body. “Is my baby tired? Oh my! It is indeed quite past your bed time.”

The brothers, especially Lucifer, loved to treat you like a child at times. Asmo once pointed out your eye bags during breakfast, and now Lucifer has implemented a curfew for everyone. No one actually follows it, but they forced me to do so.

“Mmmm, zzz..” Belphie was out like a light as usual and Beel was eating out of his plate after finishing his portion.

“We can go back to the hotel to rest, if you wish. I don’t see the point in staying up later than you’re used to if you’re not feeling well because of it.” The eldest’s voice spreads over the table. Some of the brothers are pouty about leaving so soon, some are glad to leave, and the rest just couldn’t care less.

“N-No! It’s an important day, I can’t..” I trailed off. Now you have the attention of all the brothers, even Belphie bothered to open one eye. “A close one of mine died some time ago, and today is their birthday.”

I felt their eyes on me, widening at the new information. That was not what they were expecting, but it’s nothing new to them. They all knew how hard it was to lose a loved one, so they could all sympathize.

I was surprised when Levi reached out first, holding my hand in his sweaty palms as he looked away from across the table. “Please.. don’t cry.” He murmured.

I chuckled softly, pulling up a soft smile and shaking my head. “Don’t worry, it happens. Death reaches everyone. At least I get an excuse to party!” I pumped my fists in the air in a futile attempt at being enthusiastic. I couldn’t hide the tears welling up in my eyes, so I picked up my drink, lemonade with some masala mixed in it, and kept myself busy. I didn’t even like it, but I needed it to not cry.

I sighed softly when they started to chat again, glad they left it at that. I felt their concerned eyes travel over me time to time, and their attempts at including me into their conversation failed for the most part.

“Do you think… I could see them again?”

Lucifer looked up first, knowing what you meant. “Ah.. Well, the chances are higher that he became a spirit. Spirits tend to go wherever they like, so it’s hard to track one down. And if you do manage to do so, you’ll find them as a shiny orb.”

I nodded my head slowly.

“I would suggest a resurrection spell, but that’s highly dangerous. I’m sure Solomon would avoid such spells as well.” Satan included, placing his knife down.

“No, no that’s fine.” I muttered, then smiled. “Thanks either ways.”

“Look.. Ya can cry if you want.” Mammon’s voice rang softly from the right side of me, his eyes watching me carefully and with a certain gentleness that he’d deny if being called out on.

“You know, the day Lilith died was when we fell.” The gruff voice of the 6th born started, some chewing sounds followed behind. “No matter how much I ate, I couldn’t fill that empty hole. But when you came.. I feel a lot more full! You’re like.. worth more than a thousand Human World cheeseburgers.”

Belphie lifted his head, interrupting his twin. “What Beel is trying to say is that we’re always ready to help, like how you helped us.”

“Ya! Yer always taking so much on yourself, don’tcha get tired anytime?”

“It is a wise option to rest, considering the mental strain you might be going through.”

“Omg! A spa day always helps me! You should join me <3”

Their voices slowly drowned out, and all I could hear is the loud beating of my heart ramping it up in my eardrums. My grip around Levi’s hand tightened, and I lifted my other hand off my lap and around my face. Long withheld tears rolled down my voice silently. Mammon’s arms swaddled me quickly, pulling my face to his chest. Everyone else slowly huddled around me, leaving Lucifer in his spot watching the rest of them. He didn’t know what to do, so he left it to his brothers this time. He’ll get his chance once they decide to call it a night and head back to the grandiose hotel.

I took a couple deep breaths. “Alright, thanks guys. You can let go of me.” I smiled softly, wiping my eyes.

They reluctantly let go, only Mammon kept a comforting arm over my slightly slumped shoulders.

The night went by more smoothly. Well, as smoothly as it can go with seven over protective demons and one emotional human.

[astrronomemes]

A NOVEL I'LL NEVER PUBLISH II: STARTERS

a collection of quotes, phrases, and sayings from a fantasy novel I wrote back in high school. change & alter as needed.

"Your survival was not a coincidence."

"You are blinded by your bitterness."

"You would have me murder an innocent little boy for what he might do?"

"No, you're not dying. Stop being dramatic."

"If I'm not a bad person, then why does everyone tell me that I am? Why does everyone treat me like I am? Why do they all hate me so much?!"

"What's so important about an old chair?"

"For the first time in my life, I don't feel like I'm doing something wrong just by existing."

"Go ahead and get in the bath, sweetheart. I'll bring you some clean clothes, all right?"

"My name's not honey. And it's not dear, either."

"Has anyone ever told you that you're really bad at relying on other people?"

"You mustn't speak like that around here, [name]! You could get yourself in terrible trouble!"

"Everyone is always looking at me like they think I'm this great big hero, but I don't even know what I'm doing!"

"Oh, honey, I'm not trying to be hard on you. I just want to make sure you're prepared for what's out there."

"Can you tell me about my parents? Were they like me at all?"

"There's nothing wrong with having a little fun once in a while."

"You're... a different kind of hero, that's for sure."

"Why are you even bothering to teach me?! We both know I can't do this!"

"They told me I should learn to play an instrument. Like the harp. I've never even seen a harp. I don't even really know what a harp is."

"Please, [name], I don't know what I did to upset you, but I'm sorry. I just want to make things right. You're my friend, and I don't want to lose you."

"God, they were really awful to you, weren't they?"

"You're not one of them, [name]. You're not like them. You're not anything like them. And I'm sorry that some people treat you like you are."

"How am I supposed to just accept a future without you in it?"

"She was the first real friend I'd ever had. Sometimes, I think she's the only real friend I've ever had."

"That man couldn't find his way to his own butthole with both hands and a map."

"These woods are dangerous at the best of times. No place for a kid like you, son."

"Seeing as somebody just tried to murder me, I'm really not in the mood for a party."

[relatableblorbopoll]

Round 1 of preliminaries, group 6

The first two places get a place on the bracket

Little reminder: there will be 2 more rounds of preliminaries, the losing blorbos of this poll still have 2 chances of getting in the official bracket

propaganda under the cut

Jesper Fahey (Six of Crows)

No Propaganda

Crowley (Good Omens)

"He's gender. He's been in love with one guy for literally 6000 years and then royally fucks up his entire confession. He yells at his plants. He drapes himself over every fucking surface he sits on. He walks like *that*. He just fuckin makes sounds sometimes. He's me fr."

Dave Strider (Homestuck)

"everything that can be said about Dave's relatability will probably sound redundant, clichéd, or overdone if you are at all familiar with tumblrs sort of blorbo culture. this is exactly why he should be in this tournament.

stop me if you think that you've heard this one before: he hides his genuine emotions behind a persona, deflects sincerity with jokes, but also has a deep desire for validation and connection, so that his persona has many cracks where little bits of his true self slip through. deeply insecure, compares himself to others. a defeatist streak, avoids responsibility. does not wish to be troubled by The Horrors. he just wants to hang out and do his lil creative hobbies (making music and drawing comics). talks a lot to the point of being pretty awkward, rambling, and accidentally saying stuff he shouldnt.

all these things I think tend to resonate deeply with a lot of people, especially on Tumblr - that "person who is insecure and struggles with emotional openness so copes by making jokes" sort of trope, it's just like kin bait (affectionate). he also has a complicated relationship with gender which I know many find relatable (shout out to the "Dave homestuck was my trans awakening" homies) but whether it's about figuring out gender or sexuality or trauma or the apocalypse or anything else, Dave comes at it with an initial, learned, fear and reluctance that I think a lot of people have experienced, because it's very human and very much a part of many readers experiences (we live in a society). but he's always good, and likeable and that makes for a very important sort of relatable character. very comforting. even if he's a mess and he's an idiot you can believe he can get to something better, and you can watch him develop and grow.

also, I think he's extremely relatable because he never really knows what's going on in the comic either. I mean, that's gonna be relatable to most people Vis a vis homestuck. he's confused and he just wants to vibe and make his friends laugh. WHO AMONG US cannot relate?? I do not believe you if you say no.

I wrote too much and got way too weird about it. I'm sorry it's late I'd edit down but I really don't have the brain capacity.. which is very Dave core of me actually"

Junior (Total Drama Presents: The Ridonculous Race)

"i relate to him a lot because his whole character is being embarrassed of his dad who tries too hard to be cool, but still loves him anyways. that is literally me"

Kim Dokja (Omnicient Reader's Viewpoint)

"kim dokja. oh kim dokja. so, without going into spoilers too much, kim dokja is very much a character you are expected to relate to and it makes the novel DEVASTATING. here's just a few things about him: - he is obsessed with a particular piece of media, and finds comfort in it when real life doesn't give him any. he's constantly thinking about it and defending it and trying to recommend it to other people (even though no one else bothers reading it, because it is an objectively bad 3000-chapter webnovel). even beyond that one novel, he's been using fiction as an escape for just about his entire life, something that rings true for a lot of people, especially in the modern world. - he struggles with socializing with other people. the first chapter alone gave me so much second hand embarrassment. it's so real but god it's So bad. he has zero friends and has that sort of loneliness where you're miserable but you can't really bring yourself to feel anything but resigned to it. in general he is just very Resigned to his unfortunate life and can't fully understand or accept it when it finally does get better - he has a complicated relationship with his mother. it's the kind of relationship where the parent genuinely does love their child, but they fail to give them what they need & have to accept that they hurt their kid and that they cannot be the most important person in their life. it's certainly not a universal experience but those sorts of parent-child relationships are woefully common but scarcely acknowledged -the insecurity. god there is so much insecurity in that man. it's hard to even completely tell it's there at first, because it's so ingrained in how he thinks that you don't question it until you know more about his character and suddenly it's all too apparent. he cannot believe that he can be loved (or, if that he can be, that they certainly would not be able to love all of him, only what he chooses to show them), and is selfless but like. the literal meaning of the word, where he will throw away all of his being for the people he loves. in general there is a lot of sacrifice as a love language which like. while i'm not off around throwing myself in front of magic death beams for people or anything i sure would give up everything i could if it meant helping the people i love - ok enough of that. here's some funny things i can relate to. the guy meets his favorite fictional blorbo and instead of worshipping him instead he bullies him constantly and internally complains about how unbearable he is both in the book and in real life. it's like a "i love my blorbo. i would not last 2 seconds in a room with him." You know. he gets so caught up in his fanon characterizations and biases about characters that he completely mischaracterizes them like constantly. he literally kills a guy half because he was his least favorite character. -this is a poll about blorbo relatability. therefore i must mention that kim dokja too related to his blorbo (or at least attempted to) and what is more relatable than that. anyways. kdj made me realize far too much about myself and is by far the most i have ever related to a character (and i Hate it). and tumblr would definitely relate to him too so :thumbs-up:"

"(SPOILERS) He is literally all of us. Reader. Just some guy. And then insane tragic backstory. But he’s also just some guy. He’s special and also just a guy. He’s also god. He can be shipped w anyone. He has versatility and interests and motivations. He also never tells anyone anything ever. He is so me."

"He reads a trashy, long-ass novel as a coping mechanism and doesn't think he's capable of being loved. Bro dissociates when he's emoting too much."

"I'm a homestuck fan, a Dave Strider fan even Never heard of Omnicient Reader's before Voted for the kim fellow because judging by the propaganda it looks like he himself would be a homestuck reader therefore making him more relatable than the homsetuck character himself"

"This guy’s been my companion since I was 11, I’ve grown up with Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint and I think that’s pretty funny since he grew up with Ways of Survival (the 3149 chapter novel) and therefore I’m straight up mirroring him. I, too, scare everyone off by being too enthusiastic whenever the webnovel is brought up! His insecurities are severe but I do see myself in some parts of him (which is worrying but whatever.) He is absolutely The Guy Ever. Utterly pathetic wet cat of a man. I love him. He represents the crazy fandom tumblrina in all of us."

Donutella (Tokidoki)

"she's made of donuts basically like me at this point"

[perdvivly]

*me and the girlies at a sleepover* bubbliterally: Do you guys want some more icecream? k-simplex: That's so kind of you! perdvivly: I'd love some, thank you! bubbliterally: And some tea to go with? Hot and cold; yin and yang. Balance, you know? k-simplex: You are so wise bestie. perdvivly: I swear to god if you bust out the plain tea again I will cry. k-simplex: Plain tea? perdvivly: I'll tell you later. *bubbliterally serves the food and drink* bubbliterally: So, what do you guys think is the fundamental problem of human existence? perdvivly: Must there be only one? k-simplex: That's such a big question! bubbliterally: Well, no, but are you telling me you don't feel some problem, question, facet of human existence more keenly than all the rest? k-simplex: I think, if I had to choose, it'd be that we're essentially finite beings in what is an essentially infinite world. bubbliterally: Oooh, could you say more? k-simplex: Well. I want to like. Do things. But there are more things in the world than I can ever possibly do. More experiences than I can ever possibly have... It sounds silly. bubbliterally: It doesn't sound silly! If this is important to you, I want you to be able to share. This is a safe space. k-simplex: I guess it informs a lot of anxiety I have? That I know my time on earth is really limited and my choices are boundless, and there's this mismatch there. And I'm trying to get ahead of the curve, I'm doing a bunch of pyschoactive drugs and experiencing novel experiences but... I mean, deep down I know I'm not being graded on a curve. I know it doesn't matter whether or not I have more novel experiences than the average person, I'm falling incredibly short on an objective metric. I'm trying to say 'yes' to life, but there's so much of life you know? I'll never be able to say yes to it all. perdvivly: It's a mismatch between your imagination and your reality? What you think you could do and what you can actually do? k-simplex: Not really. Imagination is an unsatisfactory collage of experiential texture drawn from memory. Experience is genuine data. I'm not seeing myself miss out, I'm missing out. There are feeling tones I don't know about, that I can't imagine until I experience them. perdvivly: And what about the bad things? Do you want to experience them too? k-simmplex: Heartbreak, pain, longing, death... These are all profound experiences. I think they're meaningful too. I wouldn't want to say my life was complete until I'd experienced them so, yes, even the bad ones. perdvivly: And worms crawling up your urethra? You'd want to experience that too? bubbliterally: Viv, you're being kind of a dick right now. k-simplex is sharing something vulnerable. perdvivly: You're right, thank you for pointing it out. I'm sorry k-simplex. k-simplex: No, I mean, I take your point. But even if I limit myself to the "good experiences" I'm still falling way short of infinity. bubbliterally: Mmmm. You want to be large. To contain multitudes. k-simplex: Precisely. I don't want to die before I've lived. And I've only lived such a very small amount in the grand scheme of things. And... Like it or not. I'm dying. bubbliterally: I think I will choose to not like that. k-simplex: What about you Viv? perdvivly: Ah. Hedgehogs. Nothing you haven't heard before. I think it's probably something I talk too much about already. k-simplex: No, we're genuinely curious. Please share? perdvivly: Well, I guess it's something like the uncrossable gap between souls. k-simplex: The uncrossable gap between souls? What's that? bubbliterally: Could you say more? perdvivly: Sure. It's something like. Well it's what David Foster Wallace was pointing to when he wrote "How odd I can have all of this inside me and to you it's just words". *bubbliterally thoughtfully eats her icecream*

perdvivly: I have this really vivid and real and deep experience and I just... I can't share it. In principle it's just. Me, trapped inside a room with a door that says "push" and all I know how to do is pull. I keep fumbling and grasping at this door. It's door-shaped, I know about doors. I've worked pull doors. But this is different. No matter how hard I try, I'm locked inside my own head. k-simplex: It's about the claustrophobia of being trapped in your own skull? perdvivly: Not really. bubbliterally: It's about connection? perdvivly: Yeah. It feels really unserious to say how deeply this affects me. But I do... You know, I do feel things. bubbliterally: Right. No. Yeah. We get it. perdvivly: I guess if it's about anything it's about alienation and it's about isolation. k-simplex: I think there are practical steps you can take for that though aren't there? I get that expressing yourself can be hard, but everyone is in the same boat. There has been a lot of spilled ink about the art of expressing yourself lately. And, when words fail you there are haptics too. What can't be said with words can maybe be said with a kiss for example. perdvivly: The DIY pop pyschology of the modern internet aint it chief. k-simplex: I'm sorry? perdvivly: Don't be, I'm just bristling at things you couldn't have any way of knowing I'd bristle at. Which is sort of exactly the thing. I mentioned hedgehogs, you know the parable? bubbliterally: Oh from Schopenhaur? perdvivly: Yeah, exactly. bubbliterally: I see... I can understand the ways that parable interacts with your existential isolation. That can't be a very pleasant way to live. Do you feel this often? perdvivly: Daily. And you're right. k-simplex: Can I make a suggestion that might seem dismissive but I don't mean it to be? perdvivly: Of course, we're all friends here. k-simplex: What if it's easier to believe that you can't show people what you're really feeling because if you did show them, and they didn't realise what they were seeing, or if they were dismissive of it, it would be easier for you to feel like you had failed in saying what you meant to say rather than that they weren't interested in it, or by extension you? perdvivly: Oh. k-simplex: I just mean, if you can't show yourself, then you never have to put anything on the line right? You never have to expose yourself to true and deeply felt pains of coexisting in the world with other people who have their own internal worlds, which are every bit as real and acutely felt as your own. perdvivly: I'm not denying that deep down I could just be one fragile child riddled with insecurity, all this deepseated fruedian stuff that pop-psychologists would love to classify as mommy or daddy issues. But it's an untestable hypothesis right? Maybe it's a defense mechanism and it's all bullshit, but it's what I feel. I feel... Ouch ouch ouch in my brain. You know? k-simplex: I know. And I know how that might come across as dismissive, which is why I gave it the explicit caveat that I did. perdvivly: I know, and I'm grateful for the perspective. I really am. Definitely something to chew on at least. k-simplex: Yeah... What about you bubbliterally? bubbliterally: Huh? k-simplex: Is there a problem you've been sitting with a lot lately? *bubbliterally thinks for a while, drinking her plain tea* bubbliterally: Scissors congruence I think.

[fluffypotatey]

hey u know how mk only calls wukong by his title and never his name? and how wukong rarely if ever calls mk "mk," instead usually opting for "kid" or "bud?" and how both of those things are kind of representative of their relationship and how both of them care about each other a lot but they aren't honest with each other or with themselves about the other and how neither of them really wants to confront the fact that the other is a person with flaws and struggles? haha yeah <- normal <- lying about being normal

be glad i have been released from class now :) [narrator: she would later find herself late to her 2nd class while writing this]

so happy you have given me this excuse to talk about— i mean, yes! it is super normal to be thinking about this all the time and be comsumed by it and let me explain why:

i will start by going off on a tangent about names and labels and their narratove importance in stories because i love them and have a problem. (idk the word count here. viewer discretion is advized. i just wrote. it is long. beware)

In the Case of Names: a Sunburst Duo Essay

by Yours Truly <3

In the Case of Names in LMK: a Summary (please for the love of pete be a summary)

Ok, so, let me give y'all a quick overview (i failed. this is you're only warning. i failed, and this became a monster of an essay. run while you still have the chan—) of names in the literary sense. When studying novels and books and shit in your literature classes, you will notice that your professor might discuss the importance or ill-importance of characters' names in the story. For example: in the classic novel Fahrenheit 451, the protagonist's name is fucking Guy Montage to illustrate how he's just some fucking guy, a John Doe, a man stuck and complicit in the dystopian world.

You get me? No? Sorry, you want more examples? Fine then :3 let me introduce you to a story called Hard Times by Charles Dickens. It is an allegorical novel that criticized the utilitarian movement going on in dear old Great Britain in the 19th century thanks to the Industrial Revolution. Some fun characters were Johannes Bounderby and Thomas Gradgrind. Tell me, what images did you imagine when I gave you those names? Did you think of a bouncing ball for Bounderby? Were you imagining something square or maybe a mechanical grinder for Mr. Gradgrind?

Remarkable isn't it. The way choosing a name has on a reader/audience's perception of the character. Names are not just placeholders for a character. Names are the identity of that character. Names can establish their starting arc or their ending. Names can be visual in the sense that they invoke a strong idea of what a character might resemble or what themes they will present the audience with. Removing a character's name also removes their identity.

Remember that.

Anyway, I have talked enough about names in the general literary sense. Let us move on to LMK.

Given that this show is based off of Journey to the West (JTTW), many of the names of the antagonist are already provided, and their English translation is pretty literal (Demon Bull King, Lady Bone Demon, Red Son) with some exceptions (Jing & Yin, the Gold and Silver Demons), but their names all provide a description of what they are and how they should be viewed. Spider Queen is a spider demon and views herself as queen. Pretty solid characterization there. Lady Bone Demon, she's a bone demon and has enough rank to be considered a lady (or that could just be to ID that she is a woman but eh). Princess Iron Fan: she's a celestial princess and wields an iron fan. Got it? Good. These examples are simply here to show that a majority of the JTTW antagonists are still fulfilling their roles as antagonistic characters. What I mean is this: since "A Hero is Born," MK has been fighting against the Monkey King's old enemies from the JTTW book. It's like the moment MK inserted himself into the role of successor, the antagonist themselves were inserted to redo their old role of fighting the "Monkey King." It's almost as if nothing has changed beside the fact that their new op enemy is a "human" wielding the legendary staff.

[hmmmm, wait i actually never put this into words until now and it's fitting very well with the whole "MK's fight against Fate/the Narrative" but we'll just put a pin in that.]

However, when it comes to MK's friends (Pigsy, Tang, Sandy, Mei), they all share different names from their reincarnated/ancestral counterparts (Zhu Bajie, Tang Sangzang (they just give Tripitaka a last name lol), Sha Wujing, and Ao Lie). Their identity is separate, distinctive from who they are meant to reflect to the audience. (But look at how Tang still shares the same 1st name to the blessed monk, see how he's the one whose powers are the most similar, see how he being pulled into the direction of emulating the monk, see how much Tang fights it, see—)

Fascinating huh? But let us move on before I forget myself.

In the Case of MK's Names: a Paragraph (DO NOT, i repeat, DO NOT GO OFF THE RAILS)

So, in the English version, there is a running gag about how MK's "real" name is long and complicated, and we don't actually know it. All we know is that MK switched it long before the pilot. And even before MK has that talk with Master Subodhi in s4ep7 (or 6? 8?), I would chuckle at how on the nose his name was. MK the Monkie Kid... how silly of the show writers....ahaha, what a funny little decision to make :)

Do we know why MK changed his name? Other than his original one being long, no. Do we know why MK specifically? We don't know. Maybe, in his fanboy brain for all things Monkey King, MK thought it would be cool to have a name that identified close to his idol. A name that identified with someone he wished to emulate and be as powerful as and felt so connected to. But what do I know? I am a mere local gal who feeds off of metas and theories and all things relating to my beloved sunburst duo.

Then, we have MK's many titles: Monkie Kid (IDs him as the new generations Monkey), Successor (IDs him as the one who will succeed Sun Wukong in both the title of Monkey King and power), Noodle Boy (pronounced "New-dle Boi and IDs as the boy who works in his surrogate/adopted dad's noodle shop), Delivery Boy (his actual job for the noodle shop), and last but not least, Harbinger of Chaos.

What makes a harbinger? What is chaos? What are their intentions? Are they good? Bad? Neutral?

So, I've already defined harbinger before and many others have as well, but to sum up: a harbinger is a being/person/thing that announced the coming of something be it good or bad but most of the time the focus is bad. A "Harbinger of Chaos" then, would be the one to announce the coming of Chaos™️ and the disruption of world order. Is this a bad thing? Well, the show presents it at the moment as so, but that doesn't mean it will be. Honestly, the show has shown order and fixed structures more in a bad light and promotes free will and choosing a destiny that fits you as the good thing 👀 (another thing to pin in the MK might to go war with Fate)

But now I have established MK's names and must shut up and move on before I no longer can.

In the Case of Sun Wukong's Names: some Paragraphs (STAY ON TARGET PLEASE)

I will admit that my knowledge of names in China is very low, and by low, I mean I know nothing (most of what I do know comes from asking friends and informational sites). So, let me begin this segment with an excerpt of Sun Wukong gaining his name from the book itself :) and break it down with my interpretation and how that is applied to LMK.

When the Patriarch heard this, he was secretly pleased, and said, “Well, evidently you have been created by Heaven and Earth. Get up and show me how you walk.” Snapping erect, the Monkey King scurried around a couple of times. The Patriarch laughed and said, “Though your features are not the most attractive, you do resemble a pignolia-eating monkey (husun). This gives me the idea of taking a surname for you from your appearance. I intended to call you by the name Hu. If I drop the animal radical from this word, what’s left is a compound made up of the two characters, gu and yue. Gu means aged and yue means female, but an aged female cannot reproduce. Therefore, it is better to give you the surname of Sun. If I drop the animal radical from this word, what we have left is the compound of zi and xi. Zi means a boy and xi means a baby, and that name exactly accords with the fundamental Doctrine of the Baby Boy. So your surname will be ‘Sun.’” When the Monkey King heard this, he was filled with delight. “Splendid! Splendid!” he cried, kowtowing, “At last I know my surname. May the master be even more gracious! Since I have received the surname, let me be given also a personal name..." ..."You will hence be given the religious name ‘Wake-to-the-Void’ (wukong). All right?” “Splendid! Splendid!” said the Monkey King, laughing. “Henceforth I shall be called Sun Wukong.”

What a fucking cutie <3

So, what can we gather from this excerpt? Sun Wukong just gained his official name. No longer is he a monkey with descriptive titles, no longer is he a monkey without a surname to be referred to as and respected for. He now has both a surname and a personal name. And while I don't fully understand everything Master Subodi listed when naming Sun Wukong, it is important to note the importance of it and how happy Wukong is to receiving it.

Before this, the book would simply refer to Wukong as Shihou (stone monkey) or the Handsome Monkey King. Both of these are descriptive titles that just inform you what Wukong is rather than who, just like with the other demons met in JTTW. But now, we get to know him as Sun Wukong, someone more than his titles and such. There's even an explanation in the preface how Wukong's own personal name has significant meaning or relation to Buddhism, but I won't get too much into that since my knowledge is of that is 0 and I want to try and stick to LMK.

Now then, let us examine Wukong's name in the LMK sense. Literally everyone in the show call him either Monkey King or "simian" (and if he really pissed them off, Sun Wukong). The only people to refer to Wukong by his personal name is Nezha, Macaque, and Peng. It is literally just these three. And while we could argue all say it like "Wukong (derogatory)," I believe Peng's the only one who means it. Meaning, I think Macaque says Wukong because he was the closest friend of SWK, thus that's the only name Macaque would ever call him (sure, he said Monkey King and shit in s1 but that was when he was duping MK soooooooo). Nezha calls him Wukong because after the whole Havoc in Heaven and journey stuff, he is the new oldest member to befriend Wukong and not be enemies with him (yes, he will get annoyed and aggravated by him, and he will not always believe Wukong's intentions are great, but he still cares and is his 2nd closests living friend).

Peng, on the other hand, does not give a shit. I fully believe that guy never cared for Wukong. They only joined the brotherhood because of Azure (they even offered for Azure to be the brotherhood's leader). I do not think Peng cares for formalities when it comes to people they dislike. We could argue that maybe Peng cared for Wukong in the beginning, but I do, honestly, not believe it. The only reason Peng even felt betrayed was because it messed up Azure's plan. Not because the two were sworn brothers.

But yeah, very few characters actually call Sun Wukong by his name, and when they do, it establishes not just how close they are/were, but also how long they've known each other. It's the same thing with how Wukong refers to others. He barely calls Pigsy, Tang, and Sandy by their names. He will give people nicknames and shit just to place a safe distance from them because of his own very unhealthy attachment issues.

In the Case of MK and SWK's Names for Each Other: the Actual Sunburst Duo Essay (you are free now.....)

Speaking of attachment issues, let's talk about the Sunburst Duo and how much these two need to sit down and talk.

So, we have discussed how names are integral to identifying a character's purpose, thematic journey, description. We have discussed how a person's title can clue in on certain characterization, present or future, and how they demonstrate the way others view them. Now let us apply this to our beloved sunburst duo.

As mentioned in your ask, @gumy-shark, both MK and Sun Wukong barely call each other by name (MK never has as far as I am aware, and SWK has done so only a few). It's "Monkey King" from MK and "kid," "bud," "buddy" from SWK. Rarely do the two ever think to say each other's name.

In the beginning, I originally thought MK only calls Wukong "Monkey King" as a way to be respectful, and with Wukong, I assumed he called MK "kid" simply because MK was very young to him. However, as we get into s3, and especially s4, MK and Wukong have grown a lot closer. Neither of them see each other as just a mentor or student but as friends. And yet, they cannot seem to stop calling each other by their title or nickname.

Thus, the distance is still there. S3 ends with Wukong promising to do better as a mentor and be more honest with MK, and we do seem him attempt this. He gives out more praises, he's more open about his feelings and then gets sucked into the memory scroll. But here's the kicker: the two are doing a reverse in their dynamic.

When it starts out, it is Monkey King who establishes the line between the two. He will simply be MK's mentor and teach him all the kid has to know in order to succeed him. MK is ecstatic to even be near SWK. This is his idol, the guy he's had a special interest in for years probably. He now gets to train under the Monkey King. He wants to do good. He wants to kickass. He wants to be just like him.

But as the story goes on, we see SWK open up to MK more and care for him deeply and want to protect him, and we see MK uncover the skeletons in SWK's closet and feel so alone and learn that the power he used to wish for is not what he expected. And in the aftermath of s3, it is now SWK who is opening up and trying to help kindle and safely guide their friendship in a healthier path(ish). It is SWK who is placing his own protege on a pedestal because "loook at him! isn't he so great and powerful! he will help this world a lot more than i did". It is SWK who is disregarding th original rules he placed. But now ,it is MK who is keeping the distance more than SWK. It is MK is trying to force some kind of distance. He feels like he shouldn't burden SWK with his doubts and worries. He is terrified of his own powers and their capabilities and worries his actions will make the same mistake as his mentor.

With s3 and s4, SWK has called MK by name quite a few times. Especially in s4. It's not a lot, but it's definitely more than before. And yet, MK cannot call Wukong by name. Personally, I think he might still feel like he's under Wukong's shadow. As his successor, there is a legacy that he will carry when Wukong actually retires and gives his title to MK (which is what I assume Wukong will do??? It is still unclear what exactly MK's succeeding SWK of). And that legacy is quite the burden. I would not be surprised that MK is unable to place himself as being worthy of taking Wukong's place just yet (if ever).

This guy was his idol for a long time. And with that, you tend to place a high pedestal for those people. MK has given Wukong such a high pedestal, and Wukong is very aware of it. It's why the guy even keeps his distance in the first place, and why he's scared to disappoint him. But, MK has learned so much, has been told of the tales and pain his mentor inflicted on others in the past (a past SWK greatly regrets), and yet cannot find it in himself to lower that pedestal or even allow himself to think about it. Because if he does, then he will have to acknowledge his own pain and his own disappointment in someone he not only admires but has come to love like family. And it is very hard to reckon with the hurt and pain caused by someone you consider family.

So yeah, they are silly monkeys who cannot communicate to save their life and need to just sit down and talk or else this will continue to boil and explode and we'll have a SWK and MK showdown (fuck yeah! i will be crying so hard).

[end of essay]

[countmur]

How Literate Arcane Characters Are - Headcanon Thread

(Vander, Silco, Benzo, Caitlyn, Vi, Mylo, Claggor, Powder, Ekko, Jayce, Viktor, Mel)

I’ve never used tumblr before so please be patient w me 🙇‍♂️🙇‍♂️🙇‍♂️🙇‍♂️ some minor spoilers for arcane 1 ahead!!

Vander:

Barely literate. He gets by mostly but he reads increasingly slow and needs to read out loud. The undercity doesn’t have an actual school system so the kids usually have to teach themselves or have their parents teach them. Vander was just a little shit as a kid, thought it was useless then and now he’s trying to learn since he’s running a business and all that. He can write, but again, barely. Has to sound out every word and even then it’s not guaranteed to be spelled right. He doesn’t understand how people read for fun. You give him anything thicker than a pamphlet and he’ll look at you like you’re crazy

Rat bastard Silco 🥰

A lot more literate than his brother, he was always more of the brains than the brawn anyway. For his work the ability to write well is a must, and he was a little less of a shit in his childhood than Vander so he actually started learning early on. He does enjoy reading actually!! He’s a bit of an elitist though and thinks he’s better than everyone else for “enjoying” classics. Probably wrote some fanfics as a teen, If Vander could read then he would definitely bully Silco.

Benzo (off topic but he doesn’t get as much love as he deserves)

He’s around the same level of literacy as Silco. Read data sets and instructional pamphlets all the time as a kid. Probably stumbled upon an IKEA furniture assembling guide once as a kid and was so fascinated he just had to figure out what it meant. Vander always comes to Benzo for help when he gets an especially fancy message from Grayson. I think Benzo would actually have some nice handwriting and would be super proud of his signature. He’s used to tinkering with very small and complex machines so he’s got good control.

Caitlyn

Idk what you want me to say here she’s a piltie with a council member for a mom I don’t know how she could be anything less than that one kid in elementary who was reading at a 12th grade level in 3rd grade. Read fanfics as a kid. Still does occasionally. Probably figured out she was a lesbian from reading fanfics. Had a weird obsession with mystery novels back then which may or may not have led her to become an enforcer.

Vi

Yeah she’s obviously Vander’s kid. Didn’t see the need to read and Vander didn’t really push her to so she just kinda never learned to read. To her the most important thing is to be able to speak well and not die. Probably liked to flip through comic books and try and piece together the story from the pictures (that or she just made up her own). Being locked up in prison for several years also doesn’t really help with literacy so yeah. Vi is illiterate.

Mylo

Most literate of Vander’s kids. He’s not super advanced but he’s doing a LOT better than his siblings. Benzo probably gave him a book on lockpicking without telling Vander once and that’s probably where Mylo actually began to read a lot more. He enjoys the usual fantasy and adventure books but rarely has the time to read them. He’s probably around a 5th or 6th grade reading level. Likes to rub the fact that he can understand the comic books into Powders face.

Claggor (I couldn’t find any good gifs of just him sorry 😢😢)

A little less literate than Mylo but he can still read pretty well! Probably likes to flip through craft books and then never make any of the projects shown (cough cough I’m projecting cough). Same with cooking books except he actually MIGHT make a thing or two shown in the book. Likes Fantasy books as well.

Powder / Jinx

As a kid she definitely loved flipping through kids’ encyclopedias with different animals in them. That’s partly why she started reading, cuz she was so interested in what those animals were. She also had a lot of spare time since Mylo would always insist on leaving her behind and sometimes it was enough to convince Vi. Once she got older I think she stopped reading as much. She still knew how to read she just lost the love for it, reminded her too much of her past life. Silco didn’t push her to keep reading either.

Ekko 😢😢😢😭😢😭😢😢😢😭😢🥺😢

Benzo actually pushed him to read a ton, and Ekko absolutely loved and respected Benzo so he wasn’t a tough student. He loved loved loved learning from Benzo and just honestly enjoyed spending time with his mentor. Benzo wasn’t too bad of a teacher either so Ekko became very literate very quickly. Again, after the events of the first arc he also lost his love for reading. He’s a great letter writer tho especially when he needs to give instructions.

Jayce

He got into a university I think you gotta be pretty literate for that. Idk tho. Could be wrong. Again idk what you want me to say for him. Oh but! I think he speaks atleast one other language just not well. He’s highly literate in English but not in the language his mom speaks. He can understand it and can speak it but can’t read or write in it.

Viktor

Kinda like Jayce I think he speaks another language EXCEPT he can also read and write in the other language too! So he’s very literate in both of the languages he speaks. He may be from the undercity but from his accent I want to make the guess that he may have moved to the undercity when he was very young. Maybe the place he was from actually had a decent school system where he learned to read and write in both his mother tongue and English. Seems like a fan of French novels and poetry books. You give him Frankenstein and he gets excited as hell.

Mel She comes from Royalty so she is very very well educated. Speaks several languages that her mom made her learn and can probably read and write in atleast 4 different languages. Traumatized girlboss polyglot!!!

Once she was no longer living with her mother I think she really started to indulge in fiction while before her mom would rarely allow it, saying it was a waste of time or that it promoted degeneracy (off topic but if Ambessa was a politician irl she would 100% use woke unironically). Seems like she’d be a big fan of Jane Austen and Emily Dickenson.

End of thread!!

[yrrtyrrtwhenihrrthrrt]

how does the 2022 movie shit on the novel?? (I love the 2022 movie and haven’t read the book)

Hiii so first off I wanna thank you for this ask from the bottom of my heart because this story is deeply important to me and I've been seething about it for two years straight and now I finally have an excuse to talk at length about the problem without sounding (completely) unhinged. I'd also like to clarify that I'm not mad at you or anyone else for liking this movie especially if you haven't read the book. I actually think that as a standalone film, it's pretty phenomenal. The acting, cinematography, and soundtrack are really on point. The problem isn't that it's a bad movie, it's that it's a bad and seemingly purposefully disrespectful adaptation.

So now I'll get into why (buckle up). As my followers know, War Movie Commentary is not typically the focus of this blog so uhhhh sorry y'all we'll be back to your regularly scheduled brainrot soon enough, but if any of you care deeply for literature or history or the history of war, or are familiar with this book or movie, I urge you to hear me out. Sorry, It's long. I kinda ran with it lmfao

So the first and most important thing to be aware of when discussing the disrespect of this adaptation is that, while it is not technically an explicit memoir, All Quiet on the Western Front is not a work of fiction. Everything that happens is based on something either the author or a soldier he interviewed really experienced. The main character is based on the author himself. Remarque's middle name was Paul before he changed it, he entered the German military at the same age as Paul, he had a passion for writing and poetry like Paul (a passion which if I recall correctly was omitted from the movie, but my memory may be off) and several of the things that Paul experiences are directly taken from his own life. While it is not explicitly a memoir, it is a collection of the real lived experiences of these soldiers, put to page in the form of a story with names changed. I think it is inherently disrespectful to dramatically change the events of a true story, but the way in which the 2022 movie went about it somehow took it further than just that.

So one thing you should know if you haven't read the book, which I HIGHLY recommend, Remarque wrote a preface to the book that was included in all the movies EXCEPT this one, and it states the exact purpose of the story. this is quoted from memory,

“This book is to be neither an accusation nor a confession, and least of all an adventure, for death is not an adventure to those who come face to face with it. It will simply seek to tell the story of a generation of men who, while they may have survived the shells, were destroyed by the war.”

He explicitly did not want it to be sensational, or “an adventure.” He wanted to tell real stories about real people, and all those stories were scrapped in favor of what we got. If you remove maybe two scenes and changed the title and character names, the film would not even be recognizable. How can you (not you the asker but the general you) do that to real people's lived experiences? How can you disgrace the author’s wishes like that? The book takes a humanistic approach. You learn about these people, you care about them. You spend time with them goofing off in boot camp, hassling newbies in the trenches, playing cards in the latrines, you see Paul go home and you see how his time at home affects him. How his father parades him around, how he lost interest in everything that once made him happy, how he sees Russian POWs and knows that they are just like him, how his mother, dying of cancer, strokes his hair and cries when she thinks he is asleep because she knows her baby has been lying when he said that things were fine, and he's going back into that hell.

I cannot go into everything the movie portrayed differently to the book because I would have to just copy and paste practically the entire script lol. And having differences isn't inherently a bad thing! Both other movies added or removed or slightly altered a scene here and there. But there are two specific scenes, at the beginning and at the end, that I think are the most indicative of this movie’s failure and disrespect.

In the beginning of the book, which is not told in chronological order, we are introduced to the main friend group and find out that their friend is dying in the infirmary. They visit him, they crack jokes and tell him he's lucky he'll be going home, but he's obviously not improving. He is unaware that his leg has been amputated. One of them asks for his boots, since he has nice military boots, for when he “goes home”, and the others kind of shut him up. Later they discuss how they all know Franz is dying. Paul reminisces about Franz, how he was always timid, how his mother made Paul promise to protect him. He goes to visit Franz again, and he's doing real bad. The author describes in detail how you can see the death in his face. He is now aware his leg was amputated. He wistfully tells Paul that he wanted to be a forester when he grew up, and now he never will. Paul tries to reassure him that “prosthetics are great these days!” (This was written in 1920 lmao) and insists Franz will go home. Franz asks “Do you think so?” And then when Paul remains insistent, he quietly replies, “I don't think so.” He tells Paul to give their friend his boots. Paul sits in silence with him, foreheads pressed together, watching as his friend slowly dies from infection. His internal monologue is distressed about the orderlies ignoring them. “I want to grab them and I want to scream, ‘his name is Franz Kemmerich, he is nineteen years old, he doesn't want to die, don't let him die!’” As he hits in silence until the end. All these characters are emphasized to be nineteen years old.

This is the most important scene in the book. It sets the tone for the whole rest of the story and happens very early on.

Meanwhile in the movie, an unnamed character who we vaguely see hanging around Paul gets instantly blown to shrapnel and his severed leg gets blown off and Paul finds it, cries for 8 seconds, and we move on.

So that's a pretty big failure, I would say. This was the point in the movie I started getting a real bad feeling.

So that's the beginning, now the ending which, while it is the insulting cherry on top of the disrespect pie, I cannot get over how absolutely ridiculous this film ending is. First of all, the whole bit with the military officials? Not in the book at all. That big end battle after the armistice for literally no reason? Yeah, that didn't happen. I don't know how the writers forgot that you cannot completely fabricate an entire battle in a film about an actual war that really happened. And what disgusted me was they have Paul die in a vicious killing spree, bashing heads in, storming the trench (in this fake battle that didn't happen) stabbing people, shooting people, strangling people, throwing bombs, going nuts, getting nearly DROWNED IN SHIT WATER. Need I remind you this was the self-insert of the author who they had doing this? I get what they were trying to to do, show how an innocent non-violent guy got “broken” by the war but that is not faithful to the story. It borders on fetishizing violence, which as previously mentioned was the exact OPPOSITE of what the author directly stated that he wanted his work to be perceived.

Paul did what he had to do, but he was never sadistic and never liked killing and certainly never went on a killing spree. Again, this is meant to represent the AUTHOR.

So how does he die in the book? It's where the title comes from. “He fell in October, 1918 on a day that was so quiet and still on the whole front, that the army report confined itself to a single sentence: All Quiet on the Western Front. Turning him over one saw that he could not have suffered long. His face bore an expression of calm, as though almost glad the end had come.”

Bit of a different picture, innit? Look, I don't mind movies being different to books, I don't particularly mind this movie as it stands on its own, but it chewed up, shat out, and stomped on Remarque's legacy and it absolutely devastates me to know how he would feel if he saw what they did to his story. The rage I feel on the behalf of a person who just wanted to tell his real story is unfathomable.

[sluggybunny]

Sluggy i want to know more about Saturn! does she have any special skills or powers? a love interest? what is her personality likeeeee :>

first off.

i will cry. i love u. thank you for being interested in saturn. i shall tell you many things.

Saturn has special powers! She is magically awakened, aka she has magic powers. But she is freaked out by them lowkey and chooses not to develop them and instead suppresses them. Instead she is very skilled with beating the shit out of people & handling shotguns and machine pistols.

Her personality is very gaslight. girlboss. maybe a bit of gatekeep but shes mostly on that gaslighting shit. She is always lying, even about really innocuous stuff. You can never tell what her real feelings on a subject ever are because she is just dishonest down to her very bones. She's even dishonest to herself. She has a very nihilistic point of view on life and just is drawn to things that are 'exciting' or entertaining because what else is the point? Additionally, she's an elf so she's going to live a long time so that adds to it lol.

a snippet from her profile: "Saturn does not care. Whatever you're thinking about, she doesn't care. She would walk directly into hell with a smile on her face. A lifeless smile but a smile nonetheless. She is interesting in that she never puts on airs around people, she doesn't hide when she dislikes something or someone. She does not care for formalities or being polite. But that does not make her an honest person and when you interact with her, you walk away knowing less about her than you did before."

She has a love interest and he is (looks around the room to make sure nobody who knows who this character really is is here) Lofwyr, who is like. A dragon? CEO? Does the council agree with Dragon CEOs? LOL. He is like the master of all schemes, always pulling strings and makes elaborate plans so it was only natural she is drawn to him. Their relationship is very "you wanna fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid." I actually have drawn some comics and wrote a lot of stuff with them because I am unwell about them both. (Lofwyr is a character from the game/novels of Shadowrun, i get the award of having the most niche & obscure blorbo)

some other stuff about saturn:

she wears gold because of her boyfriend, yes. this is true. i know its more in trend for complementary/contrasting color schemes but you know whats hot? being decorated as a sign of being owned. sorry

she is native american/first nation which is very important to me, i am usually anxious to share my ndn characters

she is quite tall!!! 6'2/190 cm

her birthday is 4/2/24. in the current timeline of the story, she is around 56. i picked that year because thats the year I created her! (techincally, 2023 but i was in the hospital when i first thought of her. when i really started going nuts writing stuff, it was 2024)

[phading]

Hi, it's me!

Okay, so there’s probably a lot you don’t know about me. So just in case you’re in the least bit interested:

I try very, very hard never to read incomplete fics. Purely selfish, and the result of reading far too many heart-grabbing stories that never got finished. If you need kudos or encouragement or anything else to continue, I’m here and over the moon excited to read anything you’d like to throw at me. Just let me know what you want in return - comments, critique, suggestions, hugs, encouragement, emojis, whatever ...

I posted one fic a chapter at a time, and I doubt I’ll ever do it again.

Characterization is everything.

If you’ve noticed an absence of Brains, Grandma, Lady P, Havoc, etc… in my fics it’s because I don’t give a twit. Perhaps one day I will evolve beyond this simplistic state.

I suck at prompts, challenges and deadlines. My muse is never in the right headspace at the right time.

I have a ridiculous need to keep it believable when really, the stuff that goes on in the show – no matter how much I adore it – is often somewhat miraculous.

It’s the future, people, I’m allowed to invent things.

In real life, I write kids’ books.

To the best of my knowledge, I’m the oldest member of the Thunderfam. Challenge me if you think you can claim the title.

The first thing of importance I ever wrote was a full length Star Trek Next Gen novel which I submitted to a few select New York publishers (oh, the innocence of youth) . Surprise, surprise, many of them actually read it and sent back comments written on famous restaurant napkins.

So, in light of all of the above, I’m once again doing my own thing. Inspired by the recent “10 opening lines from 10 recent fics” post I’m changing it up to “10 opening lines from 10 WIPs”.  I mean, seriously, I’m a newbie here and have far more WIPs than I do finished fics. So here’s what’s – pray to the anti-depression, anti-chronic pain gods  – coming up …

A WHOLE LOT OF SUPERFICIAL The uniform discarded in a heap on the floor outside the showers was expected – the purple neoprene wasn’t. (Virgil, Scott, shaping up to be humour)

THE LAST ZOO ON EARTH “Say again, John. I thought you said we have a situation at a zoo.” (All brothers, major rescue, major whump, pissed off Gordon)

THERE ARE NO CANNIBALS ANYMORE “Sir! I need you to calm down!” (Hurt Virgil, this one could go graphic in a hurry)

IT DOESN’T HURT Virgil glanced up from the piano keys, searching for inspiration but instead witnessing his fish brother's spectacular dive off the board – a dive that would leave his re-built back in shambles. (Fishtank, chronic pain)

TIGHT ROPE “I’m sorry, John, but if she’s dumb enough to try and pull off this ridiculous stunt, I see no reason why we should save her from her own stupidity.” (rescue gone sideways)

STARSTUCK Alan Tracy had been looking forward to this moment for a very long time. (Hurt Virgil, guilty Alan, Thunderbird 3 whump)

STELLAR “Hey, John, what’s this?” “It’s personal, that’s what it is!” (Guilty John, comatose Gordon, poetry, John has a secret)

CASPIAN John Tracy blinked open his eyes, breath catching when he discovered the most beautiful thing in his universe mere centimetres from his face. (John, OC-John’s lover, angst, Marks and Wings, John is not only a telepathic Ave but he’s bi!)

PSYCHOTIC MEDIUMS The probe entered Earth’s solar system broadcasting a symphony of alien sound that instantaneously drove the half-a-million or so humans who were listening insane. (Virgil centric, angst, sci-fi)

THE JOHN-CODE “Hey, Eos, you wanna help me test this new game?” (Alan, John, Eos, virtual games gone wrong.)

[jakeluppin]

a couple asks ago, you said "whenever I start working on my novel, the first song I listen to is Pin" and now i'm super curious about your novel!! care to share any details??

okay so i have two (well, i have like twenty i've done bits on since i started writing but two that are still somewhat being worked on now) but one of them is barely anything beyond a rough idea so i'll focus on the one that's more legit

i wrote about 90% of a first draft (about 60K) and then realized there were some fundamental issues with it so i started over

i have about 16K done of my new draft, some of which is brand new and some of which is revised from the first

it's a ya romance because that's where my heart has always been

for main characters we have (which as i'm writing these i realize i am So Bad at describing characters in this way whoops):

jake - jewish trans guys who is only out to his older sister (rachel). at this point, their parents are gone/dead (i've been back and forth on exactly what went down) so rachel's raising him. he's been in love with his best friend (caleb) since basically forever. he does stage crew for his school's theater department.

caleb - jake's best friend. he's gay. he has a crush on their mutual friend peter. he's one of those people who are just so loving that it's so easily to just get lost in. but also a total dick at the same time?

peter - he's really into theater, always in every production, which is how jake and peter met. just before the story starts peter and caleb were running lines for something and peter kisses caleb. described by other characters as being the nicest person you've ever met.

and then there's asher - his family just moved to town as his mom is the new cantor at jake's synagogue. he's also into theater and auditions for the fall musical, alongside peter. jake and caleb are there watching and jake hears him sing and is like. oh. shit. i'm in love. it's not revealed until midway through the book but asher is also a trans guy.

it's basically just a coming of age love story where jake finds himself and love and it's just really gay and jewish and probably very self indulgent but who cares?

oh also i have switched which musical they do multiple times for various reasons and right now it's Newsies but it may change again. but obviously asher, my beloved, is cast as davey jacobs so it is pretty perfect in that regard

gonna just throw some random lines/short scenes from draft two under the cut because i can. feel free to not read them haha

“You can’t seriously be doing homework now,” Caleb scoffs a moment later. 

I look up from my assignment and just shrug. “I’m simply not as invested in this as you are,” I offer.

“But you should be. For me. This is an important moment in my love life.”

I chuckle. “I love you, Caleb, but I think overall if I was as invested in your love life as you are, that would be a little weird.”

“Nope. I’m pretty sure it’s in the best friend manual that you’re supposed to care about it as much as I do. Sometimes maybe even more.”

“Can I have a copy of this best friend manual? I want to check the exact wording on that.”

“Sorry, only one copy was made and I keep it under lock and key.” Caleb smiles bright, and I roll my eyes in response.

--

“But seriously, you were amazing at your audition. I’m not just saying that or anything.”

“Thanks. I grew up singing. I think my mom might have disowned me if I didn’t end up with a good voice.”

“Really?” 

Asher laughs again. “Wow, you are gullible or I am not as funny as I think I am. But no, my mom would not have disowned me if I didn’t have a good voice.”

It’s this moment that Rabbi Finkle steps out of her office and says, “Asher, don’t lie. No self respecting cantor could stand to have unmusical children, just like I couldn’t stand to have children who do anything but read torah all day.” She smiles at us both, light in her eyes.

“Isn’t your oldest an atheist?” I ask.

“Yes, but he still reads torah ever day.” She laughs.

--

“So how was it?” I ask, sliding in Caleb’s car. He smiles wide as he turns to face me.

“Peter was amazing. Obviously. There’s something just, sexy about watching a guy dance.” He pauses, sighing, and then says, “I’m really gay.”

I laugh. “Really? I had no idea!”

“Yeah, not like I told you for the first time when we were like, nine or something.”

“Oh yeah, that definitely never happened.” 

Caleb chuckles and drives off. 

I can vividly remember when Caleb came out, the emotions so strong they stay pressed in mind. I can remember his fear, his hesitation, as he told me in a small voice that he liked boys. I can remember the confusion, not understanding what he meant, not sure what that meant for me. I can remember the happiness and his smile when I said there was nothing wrong with him “like liking” boys. I remember the ache I felt, when after telling him I like boys too, he told me “girls are supposed to like boys.” That ache I didn’t understand, that ache I couldn’t place for years, that ache that would come when Caleb would refer to me as a girl. 

“Were you scared telling me?” I ask a few minutes later, even though I know the fundamental answer.

“Of course,” he says. “I was nine. I was gay. And you were my best friend. Why wouldn’t I be afraid?” 

I nod in agreement. It’s something that, of course, I can understand. Just the thought of it causes anxiety to crawl up skin, pulling tight at my throat. It stops me from saying the things I want to say, things I know I need to say. The things I can’t imagine ever actually telling him.

Like: I’m in love with you.

Like: I’m trans.

Like: Yes. That means I’m guy. Which, if you remember the I love you part, would make me gay too. Or bi. Not totally sure about that yet.

Like: Main point being, I want to be with you and date you and I know you probably don’t or won’t ever see me as anything but your girl best friend but maybe you could. 

Yeah. Probably a good thing I’m not saying any of that.

--

“...Honestly, the challah was so good and reminded me of mom’s that I had a breakdown. Standard stuff, ya know. Who doesn’t have breakdowns over delicious Jewish foods?”

“Are you even Jewish if you don’t have breakdowns over delicious Jewish food?” Asher counters.

[cursed-iris]

please infodump about jatcch i beg i beg i beg 🙏🙏

👀 omg, omg ok SO i'm sorry in advance for my ravings because they are not going to make any sense,,

most people know about the jatcch movie ending, which is my favorite interpretation, but there's also the 2007 novel that the movie is based on and a lot of fans don't know about the 2005 dionysos album "monsters in love."

spoiler warning for the book below the cut because i be rambling-

basically, in the book jack doesn't die after kissing miss acacia. in fact, it's confirmed that there was actually nothing necessarily wrong with his heart and the three rules were just nonsense madeleine came up with to keep him dependent on her,,, which is... Not Great obviously. if i recall correctly, it's been a while since i've read it, he gets into this argument with miss acacia over joe and jack, like a total dumbass (with all due respect), starts ripping his heart out of his chest. this sends him into a coma for about three years. when he wakes up, he learns a few things:

a) méliès wrote a book about him and his heart (not important to this post per say, but that is where he learns he never needed a cuckoo clock heart in the first place, so yikes amiright?)

b) he looks different

c) everyone thinks he's dead and miss acacia is married to joe now

so, like, he's shit out of luck, but he tries to reacquaint himself with miss acacia anyway, who goes on about how she's unhappily married and how she's actually in love with this dude who died three years ago. jack's like, "omg girlie, that's me" and he gives her his old cuckoo clock heart.

instead of being happy that he's alive, miss acacia is PISSED. she's like, "dude, i thought you were dead, i'm in a loveless marriage, and i put flowers on your grave every day for the past few years. fuck you actually." she leaves and never speaks to him again, so jack returns to edinburgh as a phantom of his former self. really great stuff.

anyway, if monsters in love is canon to the jatcch storyline, it takes place directly after the end of the novel and technically makes the novel a prequel considering the album came first. anyway, i don't know exactly how much time has passed between the end of the book and the first song in the tracklist "giant jack" (banger song btw), but my guy's been through some things. he's godzilla-sized now and he's terrorizing scotland because,,,

reasons.

also, the song tes lacets sont des fées has a music video featuring jack, acacia, and what i assume is the "broken bird" (another song from the tracklist). it's weird as hell, but it does allude to the fact that maybe miss acacia returned to edinburgh at one point to perform and encountered jack, who is not doing it great let's be real. and she does not care about him tbh, which,, given whatever is going on in the music video, is valid.

we're not gonna ask questions, it's dionysos we're talking about. like i could rant all about my headcanons on what all the other songs mean and the fact that joe is probably mister chat, but this post is already long enough 😭

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

Hi, 👋 I’m currently in a writer’s block but also trying to note down some writing exercises to get me into the groove again. Do you have any exercise tips for writers?

PS: I just heard a cover of My Immortal (original song by Evanescence) and immediately thought of Good Omens. My brain is also connecting every song with Good Omens. Help!😅

Anyways, I hope you have a fantastic day/night whenever you’ll answer this!😊

HELLO ANON MAGGOT HELLO IT'S THE NIGHT AND I'M ON BLACK COFFEE AND YOU HAVE PICKED THE RIGHT PERSON TO ASK I'VE BEEN INHALING BOOKS ON WRITING FOR ALMOST AS LONG AS I'VE ACTUALLY BEEN WRITING.

OKAY NOW LISTEN YOUR LIL EARS UP. I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU SOME EXERCISES, AND THEN I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU ADVICE FOR WRITER'S BLOCK. GOT IT? KAY LET'S GO WRITERS.

FIRST, WRITING EXERCISES.

NOTICING. NOTICING, NOTICING, NOTICING. LOOK AROUND YOU AT THE THINGS YOU SEE, THE PEOPLE YOU KNOW, THE TEXTURES YOU FEEL, THE SOUNDS YOU HEAR, EVERYTHING. AND THEN WRITE THEM DOWN. JUST KEEP DESCRIBING. YOUR BRAIN MAY NOT BE ABLE TO COME UP WITH FRESH MATERIAL RIGHT NOW, BUT IT CAN DESCRIBE THINGS. A BONUS, THIS WILL REALLY HELP THE QUALITY OF YOUR DESCRIPTIONS, SINCE YOU'LL BE ABLE TO PICK INTERESTING DETAILS AND KNOW WHAT TO LEAVE OUT.

STREAM OF CONSCIOUSNESS WRITING. THIS MAY BE A BIT HARDER, BUT JUST START WRITING ABOUT WHATEVER COMES TO YOUR HEADS. ANY THOUGHTS, PUT IT DOWN. DON'T BOTHER ABOUT THINGS LIKE PUNCTUATION OR GRAMMAR OR SENSE. JUST KEEP WRITING WHATEVER ARRIVES. IF THIS GETS HARD, YOU CAN MAYBE FIND A PROMPTING WORD TO GET YOU GOING. A BONUS, THIS WILL TRAIN YOUR WRITING TO BE MORE SPONTANEOUS AND NATURAL RATHER THAN ARTIFICIAL OR MANUFACTURED.

WRITE WITH A PURPOSE. PICK ANY INCIDENT FROM YOUR LIFE, SOMEONE ELSE'S, ANY INCIDENT WILL DO AS LONG AS YOU HAVE ENOUGH DETAILS OR CAN COME UP WITH THEM. NOW WRITE THAT INCIDENT DOWN THE WAY YOU WOULD DESCRIBE A SCENE IN A BOOK, BUT WITH A CATCH: FIRST THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO CONVEY. FOR EXAMPLE, IF THE SCENE IS JUST YOU BURNING BREAKFAST WAFFLES, COME UP WITH DIFFERENT PURPOSES. FIRST WRITE IT WITH THE PURPOSE OF CONVEYING YOUR CLUMSINESS TO THE READER. THEN REWRITE IT WITH THE PURPOSE OF DEFENDING YOURSELF AND BLAMING THE FAULTY STOVE. THEN REWRITE IT WITH THE PURPOSE OF CREATING A SENSE OF FEAR AND AN ATMOSPHERE OF HORROR. THEN REWRITE IT AS A COMEDY. A BONUS, THIS HELPS YOU FOCUS YOUR SCENES AND KNOW WHAT DETAILS TO GIVE ABOUT AN EVENT TO SERVE THE SCENE'S PURPOSE IN THE STORY.

OKAY I'VE GONE ON A LOT IDK MAYBE Y'ALL WANT ME TO SHARE MORE WRITING EXERCISES? SOME I'VE LEARNED AND SOME I COME UP WITH IT'S ALL WILD. IDK LET ME KNOW IF THAT'S SOMETHING YOU WANT. I NEVER SHUT UP ABOUT WRITING ONCE I START.

AS FOR YOUR WRITER'S BLOCK:

LEARN MORE. ROBERT MCKEE SAID IN HIS STORY THAT WRITER'S BLOCK IS MORE A LACK OF INFORMATION ABOUT YOUR STORY AND YOUR WORLD. DO MORE RESEARCH ABOUT YOUR WORLD, CHARACTERS, STORYLINE, ETC. TAKE THIS WITH A PINCH OF SALT I DON'T WANT YOU TO GO DOWN A RABBITHOLE OF RESEARCH AND NOT WRITE.

REVIST THE STORY AND PREMISE. ASK YOURSELF WHY YOU HAVE WRITER'S BLOCK. COULD IT BE BECAUSE THE STORY NO LONGER AFFECTS YOU AS DEEPLY OR IT ISN'T AS IMPORTANT TO YOU ANYMORE? ARE THERE THINGS YOU NEED TO TWEAK SO WRITING IT IS SOMETHING YOU CARE MORE ABOUT? THIS ISN'T ALWAYS THE CASE BUT STILL. IF YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR STORY IT'S UNREASONABLE TO EXPECT ANYONE ELSE TO.

WRITE SCENES OUT OF ORDER. OKAY, THIS IS HOW I FINISHED THE FIRST DRAFT OF MY DEBUT NOVEL. I JUST WROTE WHATEVER SCENE I FELT LIKE WRITING AT THE TIME. DURING THE SECOND DRAFT I REWROTE THE ENTIRE THING IN ORDER. BUT THIS WAY I KNEW I CARED ABOUT THE SCENE I WAS WRITING AND IT WAS AUTHENTIC. JUST SOMETHING THAT MIGHT HELP.

THERE ARE MORE BUT IG THIS POST IS GETTING LONG I HOPE THIS HELPED ANON MAGGOT GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR WRITING!!!!!!! IM SORRY THIS IS IN CAPS LOCK IT COULDN'T BE HELPED. HAVE A LOVELY DAY AND MAY YOU WRITE MANY WORDS.

PS: ALSO MY IMMORTAL JUST REMINDS ME OF @patoslover'S CURSED MY IMMORTAL X GOOD OMENS FIC NOW HELP

[bettsfic]

Betts,

I want to throw up and cry—figuratively. I have been working on a story for a while now, plotting, and I still have no clue what version of it should be told. I don’t know what it wants to be and giving up when I have put so many hours in is something I really don’t want to do.

that's a very frustrating feeling, anon, and i'm sorry you're going through that. i wrote a newsletter a few months ago about the nature of a project as a whole and how i got some comfort with putting hundreds of hours into something knowing nothing will come of it.

you really only have two options: you keep writing or you stop writing. this decision doesn't have as high of a stake as it seems. both are a good thing to do. if you keep writing, you'll figure out what the story wants to be. if you stop writing, you'll figure out what the story wants to be. take the elevator or the escalator; both will get you where you need to go.

if you keep writing, you'll probably end up with however many words of a formless thing. i've come to call this the "self" draft. it's the story you have to tell yourself to learn the story. often, the "self" draft becomes the "other" draft: the story you translate from your individual experience of writing to a wider audience. not all stories begin with a self draft, but some do, and they're often the most painful to write, because they involve rewriting them into something else. until recently i believed that process involved creative concession, but in rewriting my own novel now knowing what it is, i'm finding that although maybe less than 10% of the first working draft will make it to the next, i don't feel as though i've sacrificed anything. if anything, i feel relieved that the themes and aesthetics that were so important to me at the start are made even clearer now.

if you stop writing, one day a while from now, a month or a year or longer, you're going to be minding your own business, cooking dinner or watching a movie or something, and suddenly realize you know what this story wants to be. and that feeling will be so good that it'll balance out the awful feeling you're having now. it's like planting a fruit tree--you just have to let it grow a while, and have faith that it will one day bear fruit.

[anghraine]

Hello! Sorry if this seems out of the blue and naive, but I have to ask: Do you write about P&P on an academic level and if so, is the fact that you write thoughtful near-academic content about it on social media detrimental to that? Basically I am trying to ask this:

Are you allowed to write academically about something after you wrote so much about it on social media? Especially since what you write about it isn’t, you know, “memes”, but textual analysis?

Again, sorry if this sounds weird and ignorant, but I also wrote extensively about my favorite novel on here and I also one day want to write about it on an academic level, but I don’t know if it is “allowed”, so to speak?

Sorry if this is a personal question. You can answer it in private if you want to or ignore it.

Hello! It's no problem.

I've written about P&P for grad school (both in my MA and PhD) and a bit in my dissertation, but much more about Mansfield Park. That's about all I've done with P&P academically. I've actually had more ... let's say, success as externally defined with early modern (Renaissance) stuff, which I also specialized in. So there's that.

But there's also the fact that my style and approach are quite different between academia and fandom. My Tumblr style is probably more academia-adjacent than is usual (partly for autism reasons, to be sure), but it's still comparatively casual for me and integrates fandom conventions far more than my academic work, so even when I talk about ideas that I initially was thinking through in Tumblr posts, I handle the discussion differently in an academic context and tend to advance it very differently.

So there's not much of a connection in terms of my colleagues and there isn't really anyone who's going to say, well, this basic point in the larger discussion was already made in a different context on anghraine dot tumblr dot com, you don't get to talk about it. I do avoid talking about ideas that strike me as really novel or really specific to me on social media, though.

That said, while I've maintained some separation between my Anghraine social media presence and my academic one, a lot of academics rely on social media to publicize their work and engage with other academics (for better and worse) outside the glacial pace of academic publishing.

I used to have a Twitter account for that (before the reign of Musk) and I'd just ramble on about academic stuff, including Austen, and it was usually in respect to Austen that I'd have really interesting conversations with considerably more advanced academics than me. People aren't going to want to share so much that full publications are meaningless, but they do often share enough to participate in academic discourses.

But another factor for me personally is that I actually try to avoid mixing full-throttle academic work and the works I love the most. People talk a lot about finding a way to commodify integrate what you love most into work and making it a kind of vocation, but for me, at least, that does not remotely work. It just drains the joy out of something I used to love.

I could have specialized in sci-fi/fantasy scholarship, for instance, and it would likely have been much easier in some ways, but it would also likely have soured me on SF/F (my great love otherwise). That was one of the main reasons I decided not to do it and instead went with things that interested me quite a bit, but not too much. So I tend to shy away from thoroughly mixing things that are extremely important and joyful for me with academia.

When it comes to stories I love, I kind of relate to them like a dragon with a hoard, you know? Nobody's going to take this from me! So a lot of the things I write about academically have rarely or never shown up in my fandom content because I maintain that bit of distance.

So it can be a bit complicated. I would say that I imagine publicizing some ideas makes them less likely to be published, but at other times, it's helpful in connecting with people and becoming part of academic discourse. It really depends, which is probably not very useful despite the length of this response. But there aren't many people who are in a position to allow or disallow me to write professionally about whatever I want and am professionally equipped to discuss.

[ladybeug]

was scrolling thru your art tag enjoying your comics when i suddenly discovered you were the one that wrote strangers in the bright lights. having gotten into miraculous only very recently, was tickled to experience a very small identity shenanigan of my own

incredible fic btw; i love it soooooo much. brilliant, hilarious, sweet, poignant. out of curiosity have you read much postww1 modernist stuff? i adored the usage of free indirect discourse for the narration, drunken and in motion and alive, almost reminded me of virginia woolf in a weird way lol. sorry if this is weird

Hello!! I'm about to get long-winded and self indulgent in this reply, fair warning :)

here goes:

Wow!! I don’t know how you found strangers in the bright lights if you got into ladybug in any time frame that can be described as “very recently”, I wrote that in 2018 when I was digesting some personal stuff and in a fantastic ladybug renaissance (of which I have now had several, I think I’ll die in this fandom).

But I’m so glad you somehow did. I only write every couple of years when I get really specific ideas, and the time I spend on it turns into memories of who I was when I wrote it. I feel like that must happen to actual writers too, ones who write often, but I haven’t written “often” since like 2009 and have never asked, so there you go.

But I guess that’s all to say that I am very attached to that story and it’s also one of the only things I’ve written that still feels like it hit the chord I was aiming for. It is so cool that anyone still reads it!!

To actually answer your question: I have never read virginia woolf, and the only modernist stuff I've read was years ago for school classes. I have to admit none of the style was inspired by classics, but instead inspired by the weird disassociation of trying to be alone in a crowd.

I have a final self-indulgent thought, it is a fun fact I realized as I was going down memory lane about this:

I associate ‘strangers in the bright lights’ with a friendship I made that stands out as one of the luckiest and rarest friendships I’ve made – I went to a mountain goats concert alone, and stood up at the front early, and met someone else who had gone to the same mountain goats concert alone and had stood up at the front early. It was one of the fastest and most comfortable connections I’ve made, and we liked each other so much we stayed in touch, even after they moved away. We are still in touch every so often, and as far as I’m concerned in a few years they’re going to publish the best fantasy novel you’ve ever read, so watch out for that.

The fanfiction is in part inspired by that beautiful feeling of meeting someone new that you want to talk to, and they want to talk to you, and a drink or two has propped up your self esteem and you don’t have to worry about who you are tomorrow, just who you are right now. It’s escapism. You feel important, and carried by that feeling, for as long as you are there. Lonely who? Not me. Trapped by past versions of myself, who? Not me.

Anyways the fun fact is - I found out this morning that concert was a year AFTER I posted this fanfiction. I didn't know about that moment of my life as I was writing this. The two are so connected in my mind that this is genuinely surprising, but the concert was in September 2019 and I published the fanfic a year beforehand.

In the words of mr. mountain goat himself: we held on to hope of better days coming, and when we did we were right!

[thesorcerersapprentice]

Thank you to the fabulous @that-cyber-writer for tagging me in this Writing Questions Tag Game! D.M. Foyle, as @that-cyber-writer is also known, is working on a nail-biting crime thriller entitled Tangled Wires starring Raz, a brilliant hacker on the run from the Russian mob. Interested? Go check out Tangled Wires and all of Foyle's projects here! I'm tagging (no pressure!): @inkovert @outpost51 @aquadestinyswriting @merlina87 @sarah-sandwich @lucianinsanity @winterandwords @threeking @avrablake @the-finch-address @thawinoakenshield @the-down-upside-finch @lunarmoment @sodaliteskull @kingkendrick7 @harps-for-days @cee-grice @tate-lin @rubywrite @poppy-in-the-woods @hippiewrites @the-down-upside-finch @lexiklecksi @linaket and anyone else who'd like to participate!

✦ What is your absolute all-time favourite idea you’ve ever had?

The one that inspired the novel I'm writing right now, The Sorcerer's Apprentice! Initially, I just wanted to explore the relationship between two individuals at completely polar opposite moments in life: one, an elderly character, preparing to die and looking back; and the other, a youthful character, just beginning to come into their own, in early adulthood, still figuring out who they are and what they believe in, facing forward. It would be a lie to say that the novel isn't still very much built around this dynamic, between the elderly sorcerer Valeriano and his young apprentice, Altaluna. But it's grown from the original idea to incorporate issues and topics I hadn't expected; climate change, environmental disaster, colonialism and neocolonialism, the body as a machine, contemporary theories of perception, abusive family dynamics, and more. These topics and their associated plot/world ideas are likewise what makes The Sorcerer's Apprentice my favourite written piece to date. It's like the more I dig, the more I enjoy what I'm doing. If the first idea was compelling but lukewarm, the accumulation of ideas that has ensued as I attempt to do the initial idea justice has taken it to the next level.

✦ Is there a question you’ve been asked that really stands out to you and that you still think about sometimes?

Not that I can think of off the top of my head! Sorry :S I wish I did.

✦ What is your favourite part of being a writer? What parts could you take or leave?

The trouble is, you can't have any of it without all of it, so this is a bit of a trick question, to which I don't really have a clear answer. I love it all. I hate it all. I struggle every step of the way. And I have the time of my life, always.

✦ What is your greatest motivation to write/create?

It's changed over the years! As a child, I just liked exercising my imagination. In my teens and early twenties, I wrote to escape or to envision the life I wanted, the person I wanted to be, and how I wanted to be perceived by others. Now, my greatest motivation is rage. I am one very pissed-off adult lol I suppose the difference is also that now I actually have something to say, something I feel is worth saying. And I feel that very strongly, which helps me get over the bad days at the desk where no words are coming or where I doubt my capacity to write at all. Because it doesn't matter. This -the message of my novel- has value to me. It's more important than my small personal feelings of insecurity or ups and downs. So I'll find a way. That's my motivation. It's not really that I want to write, it's that I have to. It's that I can't live in a world where this isn't said ~ and where it isn't said the way I'd like to say it.

✦ What is the best piece of advice you’ve ever read or been given as a writer?

The best advice I ever received was from a world-renowned author in his 90s who told me that it (writing) never gets any easier, so basically, your choices are either quit or keep going with the knowledge that it's never going to magically turn into a picnic, no matter how much experience/talent you have. I also got some lovely advice a couple years ago from (I think?) Anne Lamott in her writer's memoir Bird By Bird. In one of the chapters, she mentions that if you lack inspiration, you can always write to get your own back, aka. you can always write as a way to avenge yourself. And that just flipped a switch in my brain. I don't think I'd be writing The Sorcerer's Apprentice without that little seed she planted.

✦ What do you wish you knew when you were first starting out writing?

Nobody knows what they're doing. You'll never be more prepared than you are right this minute. But also, you have to live a little before you can know what you want to say ~ the same way you have to live a little to figure out who you are. Writing is organic. It grows with you. You have to let yourself grow, so the writing can follow.

✦ What is your favourite story you’ve written to completion? Link it if you’d like and can!

I don't have a favourite completed story to share, so I'm sharing a link to my current WIP, The Sorcerer's Apprentice, a fantasy novel exploring the interplay between colonialism, capitalism, and environmental catastrophe through the fraught relationship between a mysterious sorcerer and his protogé.

✦ Which of your characters would you say has the most controversial mindset? Why do you say so, and how do you personally feel about their ideals?

Valeriano, the antagonist of The Sorcerer's Apprentice, is the only character I've ever written whose views are absolutely despicable in almost every way. I'd be very concerned if my readers don't find his mindset controversial. The man is sexist, racist, and classist; he discriminates against any LGBTQ+ classification that isn't his own (biphobia, anti-lesbian, etc.), he's morally perverse, and he bristles with a sense of in-born superiority. In short, he represents the polar opposite of my own personal views and ideals.

✦ If you, when you first started writing, met you now, what would younger you think?

A younger me would definitely not recognise me, let alone understand why I'm writing what I'm writing. And that's how it should be! I'm glad little me enjoyed a time when all that mattered were unicorns and fairies, and the world was bright, open, and good. I wouldn't take that away from little me for all the world, not for anything. Plus, I have the lingering feeling that little me would be proud of me anyway. Even if she doesn't quite get it. She'd trust me and my choices. We'd be different, but we'd be cool, you know?

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