#SHE REALLY CAN’T STOP HERSELF
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“Yes. Stole my own hypothesis and turned it against me.”
“Fascinating. I’d love to meet her.”
“… Ah. So you’re just like her here, aren’t you?”
“I’ll be the judge of that.”
“*Sigh…* unfortunately, you’ve already made it quite obvious.”
#yeahhhhh#sometimes my colouring pops off and I have no idea how to replicate it lol#anyways this is my mirror Moira bc#hc*#I can’t get onboard with the Long Hair mirror Moira#unless it’s a butchy mullet I just can’t see her ever having long hair#mirror or not#I don’t hate the design choice but I’m very Meh about it#so I hc that goody two shoes moira still hypothesized genetic deconstruction#but never had the intention of actually testing it#mercy (or Vengeance) called her out on her cowardice and ended up testing it on Moira herself out of morbid curiosity#mirror moira considered it and that’s all Dr. Ziegler needed to go through with the experiment#Moira couldn’t stop her if she tried#I’m thinking she manipulated moira into thinking it was a smaller-scale test when it really wasn’t#somethin like that#then our Moira hears about this and is like b0nerrr alerrrt!!#and thus our Moira wants to meet this fallen angel herself#overwatch 2#mirrorwatch#moira odeorain#vengeance mercy#mercy overwatch#moicy#moira overwatch#ow2#talon mercy#also I acknowledge that she would probably not say that inch/mile saying… but maybe mirrorwatch world uses imperial moreso than metric lol
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Hhhghghghggh Agatha making the ballad with Nicky the deaths of thousand of witches caused directly by the literal representation of her grief for her son… Billy making the road real in the same way that Nicky made it real initially… my blood my flesh my bone… mother maiden crone… down down down the road… down the witches road… are you walking this road alone? We walk the windy road. But I can’t heal you. I can’t protect you. I cant divine when she’ll return. Who’s she? Rio is death. No one in history has had special treatment like you. You call what you did to me special treatment? You gave me nothing. You only took. Please, my love! I need more time, please I want more time! This can’t be the end- This has to be the beginning! I broke the curse I can actually do something with my life now! I killed them all. I’m a murderer. You’re just like your mother. Is this how Nicky died? Agatha am I killing this boy so my brother can live? No, Billy.
Sometimes boys die.
#agatha all along spoilers#Agatha can’t face him because she knows that she used the song they shared to do what Nicky hated most#im really really really ok#also Lorna using the song as a way to protect her own child#what Nicky would have wanted#and Agatha doubling down and killing Alice the same way she always does#because she just can’t stop digging herself deeper into the hole#agatha harkness#agatha all along#billy maximoff#nicholas scratch#the witches road#ramblings#im going fucking crazy
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Holt’s vision was basically the first thing to go as she became infected with the corruption happening in Sierpinski-23 and it absolutely wrecks me
#I WISH I WAS BETTER AT STORYBOARDING AND DOING COMICS#bc I think about that moment between her and sieben#Holt’s eyes are visibly cloudy and the most she can make out is light/shadow and rough shapes#she can’t make out any of her old lover’s features and relies completely on her voice and touch#Holt can be pretty stubborn/prideful for a eule (the more I think about her she’s probably degraded some but is reliable/quiet enough abt i#but yeah she’s especially stubborn about Sieben. but at that moment she’s also so so scared and in pain#and she’s trying to have good humor she’s trying to be brave for Wanze at least#I think there’s a certain amount of vulnerability she can have with Sieben though due to their history#they both know Holt’s going to die#and so Holt doesn’t mind stopping the act for a second#if it means she can ask Sieben to hold her hand for a bit#and she does. it’s nice for a while.#Sieben doesn’t really want to look at Holt (her face is falling off she’s gross and seeing her like that also makes Sieben want to cry)#there is a lot of bitterness and regret between them and there’s a lot either of them could say#I think abt them and that particular moment A Lot#Wanze also :((((#Sieben only visits her earlier on but Wanze sees Holt as her mind starts to go#it’s hard for both of them. Holt doesn’t know who she is and can’t recognize her#so a lot of their time together is Wanze trying to comfort her and let her know everything’s alright#she can’t save her she’ll never be able to it’s not her fault#but Wanze will never stop blaming herself for it#she could’ve done more Holt did so so much and they were right. Wanze IS just a Fehler. a bug an error a mistake#she can’t help the person who thought the world of her. the person she loved more than anything#Anyway idk where I was going with this not anywhere in particular just Thinkin about them#blorbo tag#holt
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Why does tfcon have to come right when I need to pay rent 😔
#relic answers#normally this would not be an issue#but we’re waiting on my grandma’s social security money that’ll come right in the middle of the tfcon dates#and she kind of Can’t Pay The Rent By Herself#and I feel like it would be jerkish of me to leave my other family who lives nearby to do it#so even though I really want to go I have to be responsible 😞#I would’ve met a lot of my friends in person for the first time if I were to go#…great now I’m making myself sad ahshdhdh#I’ll stop before I start spiraling lol
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Modern au
Okay so Manon started taking birth control soon after puberty (it happened when she was 15 but she was already sexually active so she had to be careful) so really, in essence, she only experienced periods a couple of times before she stopped having them altogether.
When she and Dorian decided to conceive, she went off of birth control. Having her period for the first time in over a decade was a jarring experience for Manon. She was in a lot of pain, she was feeling nauseous, she was feeling dizzy and the entire thing was awful.
Dorian called Asterin in panic, because is she supposed to be in so much pain??? Asterin assured him that painkillers, sleep, and hot drinks were all he needed. He was still skeptical though, because that sounded too simple for what appears to be a serious problem.
Needless to say, he was fussing over Manon the whole time. Making sure she's comfortable, timing the painkiller doses, providing all kinds of drinks, and helping her get some sleep in the middle of all of that.
#booklr#books and reading#throne of glass#manon blackbeak#tog#dorian havilliard#manon x dorian#manorian#asterin blackbeak#asterin found it amusing but also not#because if he's fussing and freaking out over period crams then bro is not ready for pregnancy and birth#but also she reasoned that this should get him used to how things might be#honestly asterin found the whole thing cute but she kept that thought to herself#slightly teasing dorian but also giving him tips on how to handle things and when to actually go to the hospital#manon dealing with periods for the very first time well into adulthood was not a fun experience#she hated every moment of it and honestly thought she might die from this because why is she in so much pain???#he also called Aelin for the same thing because he wasn’t very convinced#aelin told him the same thing basically#did he stop? no#he called yrene next and honestly just turned the whole thing into an emergency situation#he was 100% certain that yrene was going to tell him to take Manon to the hospital#but she didn’t she only said if certain symptoms show up then it’s probably an emergency but other than that just so what Asterin said#he really can’t stand and do nothing while Manon is in pain he feels very helpless
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Modern AU
Cassandra has a death wish with the drinks she makes. Bela is surprised her sister didn’t get a heart attack. But that is only Bela, what does she know when it comes to the things that her sister does. As long as she’s handling this madness just fine, Bela shouldn’t have any reason to complain.
But the eldest daughter feels obligated to mention what is mixed with the vodka. Because different people like different things right? Some prefer cranberry, others prefer cherry soda, and then there is Cassandra’s mix which is vodka and red bull. Of course, it isn’t for show, Cassandra does drink that monstrosity and thinks most people are okay with this thing.
It isn’t only vodka. On occasion, Bela saw her sister mix espresso with red bull when she needs the extra burst of energy after staying up very late. How her sister didn’t drop dead after drinking that is still something Bela wonders about to this day.
Cassandra never listens though. She thinks it’s okay and as long as her body isn’t rejecting this then why should she stop?
On a morning while the girls were staying over at their aunt Donna’s house, Cassandra did toss espresso in a glass full of the energy drink. It was then that the three sisters saw their very kind and very soft-spoken aunt snap.
Donna is very against energy drinks. To the Italian woman, if you need energy you get it from caffeine that’s either in tea or coffee, and that’s about it. Energy drinks are a huge no in her book and she often speaks about it. To see her niece nonchalantly mix two things that have no business mixing together, the woman was sent over the edge.
Donna might have over-dramatized it. She didn’t have to go as far as to mention how she would tell Alcina that she stood by while her daughter killed herself. Because the woman is convinced that the second Cassandra drinks the beverage, her soul will depart from her body.
Daniela, trying to help her aunt calm down, mentioned that she should relax because “Cass does this a lot you really don’t—“ But she was interrupted because what do you mean she does this frequently?
Donna wonders how Alcina allows this. To which the daughters gulped because their mother doesn’t really know and they figured that what Alcina didn’t know wasn’t going to hurt her. But of course, Cassandra is cocky and thought her aunt wouldn’t even know what red bull is which is apparently not true at all.
#house dimitrescu#cassandra dimitrescu#daniela dimitrescu#bela dimitrescu#headcanon#alcina dimitrescu#house beneviento#donna beneviento#resident evil village#resident evil 8#re8#Cassandra is so hardcore she’s downright a hazard to herself#but she claims this is what she needs to get through a day after only getting three hours of sleep#but her mom doesn’t accept it because 1) WHY DID YOU ONLY SLEEP FOR THREE HOURS???#like Alcina really lost it there and cass just—brought this on herself#because now Alcina makes sure her middle daughter is going to sleep early#she literally is like ‘now I can’t trust your judgement so I have to make sure you’re getting enough rest’#which is followed by Alcina literally hovering over her middle daughter and literally forcing her to stop everything she’s doing and go to#bed. Cassandra hates it and always argues that it’s not even 10 pm no way she’s going to sleep now#but it’s her mama so she really can’t win that argument#it doesn’t stop her from trying tho#but she ensures a long period of forced early bedtime which she hates but can’t really get out of#because when Alcina is your mom there isn’t anything you can get past her#Alcina is like ‘if u don’t know how to manage your time so I will manage it for you’#and Cassandra hates it because she loves the night#but decides to milk it since her mama isn’t budging#so she gets dramatic and demands more attention#to the point of spending some nights with her mother in her room#but really she’s just being a stupid needy baby because Alcina LOVES having her daughters around#and having Cassandra spend some nights with her is actually something she loves
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Michelle by sir Chloe but its pandora staring at Dorcas MESMERIZED even though she knows she shouldn’t be because she’ll never be more than ‘just friends’ with Dorcas and the affection between them will always be nothing more than platonic even if she so desperately wants it to be more than that and the slim chance she had is no longer there because Dorcas is now with Marlene and she feels so bad for being in love with Dorcas because god she’s with someone else and she’ll never be hers and-
#Someone please tell me they understand this slightly incoherent ramble#Like pandora and Dorcas have always been affectionate with each other and neither really knows if it’s platonic or romantic anymore#And pandora desperately wants it to be more than platonic but she’s too scared of losing what she already has with Dorcas??#But then Dorcas gets with Marlene and pandora is SHATTERED because she never got to confess to Dorcas and now she’s with Marlene??#And now she’ll never be able to have Dorcas as hers and she feels so bad for loving Dorcas even though she’s with Marlene because it’s WRON#But she just can’t stop?? Because how could she when Dorcas is all she ever wanted??#So she tries to get over Dorcas and tries to tell herself that she isn’t in absolute love with her anymore (and fails)#I’m not normal about them can you tell?#dorcas meadows#dorcas meadowes#dorcas my beloved#lesbian dorcas#pandora and dorcas#pandora rosier#pandora lovegood#pandora lestrange#the slytherin skittles#the pantheon#pandora x dorcas#pandorcas#i could ramble about them forever#I’m up to rant about Dorcas’ pov if anyone’s interested (please)#Dorcas x pandora#meadowfairy/fairymeadow would be such a cool ship name for them#the marauders#the marauders girls#the valkyries#the marauders era#the marauders fandom
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I just want to be allowed to scream at my sister the way she screams at me. I want to be allowed to slam doors and throw things and break things. I want to be allowed to react to the way she treats us and not be called selfish.
#hot fucking take but I don’t really see much dialogue on how fucking traumatizing it can be to live with an autistic person#whose autism outwardly manifests the most behaviorally#her not being able to help being dysregulated does not negate how fucking scary it is#to be on the receiving end of that behavior#and to be conditioned for your entire life that you’re bad if you react in any way#this is less about neurodivergence than it is about my fucking mother#especially because I’m likely on the spectrum as well#but if someone that wasn’t autistic did those same things it would be considered an abusive environment#I’m not saying that my sister is abusive#but I am saying that it is so incredibly emotionally damaging to live in this house#any harm done to me by the screaming and throwing and breaking things is not even allowed to be considered#because she ‘can’t help herself’#and the quotes there are again less about neurodivergence than my mother#because my sister actually has really solid coping skills… when my mother is not involved#my mother will make excuses and enables her in a way that is so frustrating#my sister would actually do much better if she were living in a dorm/group home like she previously was#but that costs a lot of money#and so she lives here with my enabling permissive mother#and is more dysregulated than she has been in YEARS#because so many of the skills and coping tools she learned at her resident program#she has completely stopped utilizing because she doesn’t have to#because instead of trying to work through it my mother will make excuses for her#so instead of trying to work through it she screams so loud my ears ring#and slams doors so hard they break#and throws things in a way that makes me scared she’s going to hurt one of us#but if I display any reaction to what in any other circumstance would be recognized as a frightening and harmful situation#I’m making things worse and I’m being selfish#I’m like. fine. in the way that I’ve had to be my whole life.#which is mostly dissociating and spending as little time home as possible#but every time it happens it makes me wish I was not alive
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Victoria Valentine…. I see you.
#she’s a less fucked up season 1 yasmin kara hanani#with a mix of alicent hightower#only ever doing what’s expected of you because who are you if you’re not a dutiful wife?#unable to even conceive of rebellion#and then mothering your partner so hard that you start to hate them for it#you give and give and give but hate it when they actually take#they’re a little pathetic for taking actually. a little inconsiderate. can’t they see how much it hurts you?#but if they didn’t take you couldn’t resent them for taking and you Need that actually#Victoria clinging to duty and responsibility because that’s who she is sure but also because G ISN’T that way#clinging to it to spite G ‘who so disdained it’ in alicent’s words#everyone talks about fucked up G is and how much of a shitty spouse they are#(which they are and we should definitely talk about it)#but like… reading Vic’s POVs it’s like…. girl#Vic sorta hates G for being so horrible but wouldn’t really know what to do with herself if they stopped being that way#this is all just my own personal interpretation obviously lol#can you tell how much I love fucked up dynamics?#if: infamous#infamous if#victoria valentine#+ victoria valentine 🫂
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I think about this issue sometimes because she’s soooo quick on her feet. She’s always ready to jump into action and figure out a situation. It makes sense why people like steve rogers keep wanting her to be a leader type; she’s empathetic, she’s smart, and she’s decisive. she knows how to make those split second decisions and she’s all about putting herself in the line of fire to keep everyone else safe (see also: rogue not caring about herself and so the choice of self sacrifice is an easy one if it means saving her loved ones / innocent people)
#I’ve talked about it before and how I’m hesistant just because rogue feels like she can’t do a ‘good’ job being a leader#just because she doesn’t always want to take the high horse route or the by the book route#and she struggles with comparison to the leaders she’s had before because she doesn’t think she can measure up#and yet people still trust her wholeheartedly to lead teams / lead them#because she takes initiative she’s not scared she’s going to go out and get shit down#rogue doesn’t wait around for other people to do things for her#going off subject but like there’s so many instances where rogue gets separated from the group / taken#and she’s like well I’m not going to wait around to be saved#*done not down sorry#BUT SHE IS GOING TO FIGURE OUT A WAY#she’s been in millions of scenarios since she was a girl one of the things she definitely knows how to do is get out of trouble#also get into it but >:)#also her being empathetic is another really big part of her being a good leader#because she cares so deeply she does her best to understand all sides#she’s been on both sides she knows the things that drive people to do bad things#SORRY IM YAPPING#I like when she has the chance to lead her own team#(her picking mystique sabretooth Emma shekjsjsjs)#and she gets to do things the way she sees fit#and if it means breaking a few rules so be it#she’s the daughter of a mutant terrorist she might be reformed but there’s still some ideals#mystique wasn’t always wrong you know#stop erasing her past when she’s said it herself that all her life she’s just been fighting for one group after another#just because the xmen helped her doesn’t mean she agrees with all the takes completely#anyways#I love rogue she’s so cool and she should boss everyone around
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I’m gonna challenge my subconscious to a fist fight and I’m gonna lose
#i had a dream that mabel kept coming back to life just to sniff stuff or investigate food that she liked#she was still dead but i’d buried her instead of cremating her and for whatever reason i was either digging her up#or she was digging herself up and sniffing and eating stuff#and i was like ‘she’s CLEARLY still alive if she can do this’ and everyone was like ‘no she’s dead you have to bury her again’#whenever she fell asleep she would be dead again. like she’d stop breathing and her heart would stop#i don’t know if she was like. a vampire dog? but it was so upsetting to dream#this is the second sad dream i’ve had about mabel in the course of like 3 days.. no less because the last one made me wake up in tears#on friday morning. and like it’s brought me to my knees honestly. i can’t DO this#also in my dream i went to a careers advisor or life coach or something and they were really mean to me lol#and my family made me go with them to visit some people i didn’t know who insisted on serving us cups of tea#it was really strong hot tea and i don’t really drink tea like that#and my grandma’s friend who was the loveliest woman and died a few years ago was there#and she was just absolutely pouring milk in her tea even though it was overflowing and going everywhere#and mabel was there accosting their terriers even though she was supposed to be dead. it was too much#in another part of the dream my old roommafe (who i really didn’t like) was pressuring me to go drinking with her even though mabel had just#(dubiously) died. and i was like ‘you do realise i’m going to get absolutely paralytic and scream and cry about my dog the whole time’#there was also this subplot where like everyone i knew but me had been in a play and the stage makeup had been made from ‘magic beans’#that stained everyone blue. so everyone i met had randomly blue eyebrows and stuff#there was one man who was just fully blue#also i was supposed to be in the world championships for a game that was like tetris but more esoteric but the servers broke down#or something like that. i think that’s everything#i’m just like.. why make me bawl at 6:30 on a sunday morning. what’s the advantage of that#i’m supposed to be taking care of benji and he’s looking at me like ‘god this woman is a basket case’#his owner has colitis and chronic fatigue and she has her shit more together than me#personal
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i guess it doesn’t make sense in leviathan!charlie verse for her to be keeping her mom alive in her coma, BUT. consider: leviathan!charlie who keeps human!charlie alive after she nearly killed her. halfway through her first meal on earth, and she got flooded with human!charlie’s memories and thoughts and it was so unlike the blind hunger of purgatory that she couldn’t handle it. but she can’t save human!charlie’s life, she went too far before she stopped and now human!charlie’ll never wake up, but she can’t let her go either, can’t face that becoming this version of herself cost someone else so much. someone she remembers being. someone she is in more ways than one. but also isn’t in even more.
#even better. sam and dean being forced to confront this.#that their friend. who they love and have helped out and let stay in their bunker. she’s still a leviathan. she is still a killer.#dean ‘once someone kills once they’ll do it again’ having to confront that especially#leviathan!charlie is so joyful and carefree and always on the move because if she ever stops she will be crushed by the weight of her past.#so just like regular charlie. but add a few thousand years more history in purgatory to it.#in this au the guy she hunts down as dark!charlie could either be the guy who killed human!charlie’s parents#(its both vengeance for the girl she destroyed in becoming. but also its borrowed its for herself its grief that isnt really hers that shes#using as an excuse for violence anyway.)#OR. dark!charlie hunts down other leviathans who have also settled down to be human. because she wouldn’t be the only one.#but she can’t face them and how they took their lives any more than she can face hers. theyre all guilt of the same sin.#if the winchesters won’t put her down for hers. if she’s their exception. well. she can’t let any other leviathan live.#because what if they kill again. (dean says that she won’t. she kills every week as a hunter. as a soldier in Oz.)#leviathan!charlie#charlie bradbury#spn
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@foulbearobservation turn on your location
#what. the fuck bro#i am really thinking about night sky with exit wounds#‘if we make it to shore i will name our son after this water. i will learn to love a monster’#‘there are hands fluttering between the constellations#trying to hold on’#‘maybe the body is the only question an answer can’t extinguish’#& lilith thinking of herself as an entry wound. looking everywhere for an exit. old manuals in her hands#titled ‘how to check if a body is dying’#& how she punctures into the world nearby the people she loves#voyeur. & how when she comes back it is with a mouthful of blood#this way no one will want to kiss me#and if they do it will also be a wound#lilith who comes home because to run away you need something to run towards#or you will never stop running#cam w the line: sorry about thr blood in your mouth. i wish it was mine
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Truly devastating to want to jump into an AU for your canon x oc/si ship when you haven’t even scratched the surface of your main fic for them yet 😪
#lady terror/francis western au my beloved#with sufficient elements combined from ravenous deadwood red dead redemption and true detective#not to mention that fucking hozier song it will come back is fucking stuck in my head at all times#put me out of my misery man I can’t stand it#look I just want that sheriff crozier pining in a saloon#even going so far as to be taken upstairs by one of the girls there but stopping it all before it even starts bc he really needs *her* and#he knows it. pays up anyway and tips his hat respectfully as he goes#but he wouldn’t dare get his hopes up that a fine lady like miss sinclair would take up with an old cowboy like him#sofia didn’t and why should she she has so much ahead of her what with her exploits in her father’s business ventures#he’d just tie her down#except he’s wrong bc he’s shown himself capable of letting her be herself. trouser-wearing and all on their search for that band of outlaws#and suspected cannibals up in those mountains who have been pinning things on the natives that SHE knows and has befriended and wants to#protect from the law. and she’s damn crazy for putting the bounty out and for going along with him but SHE DOES#and she can take care of herself but neither does she want to be alone and she chose him#he’s one of the only people who sees that in her#I’m gonna go cry about it cranky frog style now ok goodnight everybody
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My household is so toxic right now I can’t even handle it
#abby doesnt shut up#my sister is having anxiety and the whole world needs to stop for her. but!#on Christmas Eve my anxiety was bad and she berated me and called me boring and overly sensitive in the car with my whole family#and I cried really hard. but dw girl I’ll take care of you!#she can’t handle any of it on her own. like zero.#just ran up to my mom saying she has to go to an outpatient program. this anxiety started THIS WEEK.#now my mom is upset with everyone#my sister just can’t think outside of herself. her experiences are always the worst. she doesn’t understand her privilege whatsoever.#<<*worse than anyone else’s
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I think being autistic does actually make me inherently better at animal handling because I, too, have been yelled at for growling and biting when everyone ignored my previous warnings and didn’t set clear boundaries
#my roommate’s always like Wow my dog responds so well to you!#yeah bitch I set clear expectations and consistent rules and I don’t yell at him#and I pay attention to his body language and the rituals he creates#literally it’s not that hard#ya she got him to train as a service dog LMAO#she doesn’t have the money to send him to a trainer and the time to do it herself#when I recommended she pull from the emergency fund (because his reactivity is getting BAD to the point of borderline aggression)#she was like ‘who has an emergency fund for their pet :P’#BITCH IDK IM NOT MAKING $30+ AN HOUR WITH A 401K AND FULL INSURANCE PACKAGE#THATS WHY I DONT HAVE A DOG??#just an in-the-works shrimp tank that I do in fact have a small emergency fund for#it’s your job as a responsible pet owner to attend to your animal’s needs. if you can’t do that you shouldn’t have a pet#and she fucking undermines the training /I/ give#like I was teaching him to find a toy when someone knocks at the door to redirect his energy and prevent barking#but now whenever he barks at the door she YELLS at him to find his toy#so I had to stop training that area because like. what the fuck am I gonna do???#notably I am the only person who can consistently get him to stop barking at the door#completely unrelated to the fact that I’m calm and give him treats when he stops barking#and comes over to me and chills out#goddddd I hate her she shouldn’t have any animals ever#anyways what was I saying.#oh yeah I’m the only person in this apartment who should ever be allowed to have a dog#this is also why I dont plan to get one! I recognize that the college life is simply incompatible with responsible dog ownership#(unless EVERYONE is REALLY onboard which. lmao good luck.)
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