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may-fanfic · 4 years ago

Text

In A Minute

summary: natasha wasn’t the same since the blip and after 5 years, she finally found a sense of hope, only for it all to come crashing down for you when Natasha doesn’t return like she’s supposed to

warnings: death, angst

rating: 18+

word count : 2,473

a/n: just watched endgame again and im grieving so i wrote this enjoy the angst

masterlist

((feel free to send in any request you may have))

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Natasha watched closely as you moved things around her office, throwing away things that you deemed useless which was nearly everything in the messy office. she had been in such a rut and you knew it couldn’t be good. you knew Natasha had been close to everyone on that team and she had felt like pieces of her went missing.

“you don’t have to do that,” she stated from her seat, her eyes growing watery. it has been nearly five years since the blip and you knew if Natasha kept up this way, she wouldn’t be useful, like thor and you couldn’t lose nat too.

you dropped the mess of papers in the bin before making your way over to the girl who stared hopelessly at you. you noticed the bags under her eyes and her chapped lips. she was wearing the same sweats from the last time you saw her.

“natty, I need you to be at your best.” Natasha looked like she lost some weight and you wondered when she had her last meal. she shrugged lightly, her lips quivering as she did so. you moved to kneel in front of the avenger placing your hands on her thighs, resting your chin against her knee.

“I miss you nat.” you knew that you saw her nearly every day but you missed the person she used to be, before Thanos and everything. she was always so carefree and happy and now it seemed that the smallest thing could tick her off. your comment made her eyes flow freely as her shaky hands came to rest softly against your cheeks.

you leaned against her warm hands causing her thumbs to brush against your cheekbones. “Just please take a break for me, baby,” you begged her, your own eyes turning watery and when she nodded, you leaned up catching her lips in a soft kiss.

it had been a while and Natasha forgot how much she missed it. you pulled away too fast for her liking but she figured she’d save the kissing for later. you had continuously promised her that you and her would figure it out, in due time and maybe you had been right to tell her to worry less.

------

Natasha had moved through the compound, drying her damp hair with a small towel before she stopped at the kitchen, watching quietly as you moved through the area, setting the plated food on the table and it dawned on her all at once that, yeah, she lost a lot of her loved ones but you were still here and she hadn’t been appreciating that enough. she knew she’d completely lose it without you. you turned to catch her warm gaze and the tiny smile that had formed on her lips.

"come here,” she muttered setting down her towel and opening up her arms. you were quick to move into her embrace, resting your face in the crook of her neck as her arms found your waist, reeling you impossibly closer as you hook your arms around her shoulders, letting a soft breath go when her arms tightened around your waist.

"I miss this." she purred out, her hands rubbing up and down your spine with ease. as much as she didn't want to think about everything going on, she couldn't help it. she nuzzled her face into the nape of your neck, breathing in your sweet scent. it made her feel safe, feeling you so near made her feel whole and all she wanted was to soak up this moment as much as she could because it was perfect. everything about you was perfect.

"me too." you breathed out, your eyes falling closed, taking in the feeling of her hands over your back. this was the Natasha you missed, the one who was always so careful and affectionate with you.

------

when ant-man came along, rumbling about time travel, it gave Natasha a sense of hope. finally, for the first time in five years, she felt like they had a chance to turn all this around and you wanted to believe it for her sake because she seemed so happy, so you went along with the man's theory. you knew Natasha just liked to feel useless, she hated just sitting around and waiting for something to happen.

the night before the mission, Natasha could hardly sleep as she gazed over your soft expressions. she knew that there was always a risk when it came to the things they did but she hoped everything worked out perfectly. she just wanted everything back to normal.

she reached her hand over to gently caress your cheek. your eyebrows knitted together, letting out a soft sigh in your sleep and she couldn't help but grin at you. she thought about the chance that something would happen to you throughout all this, she knew she wouldn't be with you and the fact that she wouldn't be able to protect made her feel uneasy.

she couldn't lie and say she had no fears when it came to what was to come but she knew it would work out exactly how it was meant to and with that sobering thought, she drifted off to sleep.

-----

your hand was tighten entangled with hers after you both had been suited up, you had a moment with just each other. Natasha liked the comfortable silence but she also had so much to say to you, she just didn't know how to say it so she was glad when you spoke up first. "I love you," you whispered out, turning your attention over to the girl who looked down at you with a gentle smile. "I just wanted to say that in case-"

"I love you too," she uttered out quickly, her smile growing when she noticed the way your cheeks burned a bright pink. "everything's gonna be okay, love." she reassured, her fingers caressing gently at your knuckles. "it's only gonna be a minute." she reminded you with a smile and for a second you felt at ease, simply looking up at the woman whom you loved dearly.

"longest minute ever," you whispered gaining a soft laugh from her as she turned her body to embrace you completely. you rested your head against her chest when she pulled you into her. her hand came up to hold your head in place while the other wrapped securely around your waist. she brushed a soft kiss to your hairline, holding you as close as possible.

"Alright girls, let's go." clint tapped on Natasha's shoulder and she reluctantly let you go, offering you a sweet smile as she took your hand and walked you up the platform. you couldn't hear steve's speech over the sound of your heartbeat, it was louder than ever. you knew he was finished when Natasha squeezed your hand softly to get your attention. her smile was wide, she seemed so excited and ready to take on whatever would come in her way. "see you in a minute, baby." you smiled back at her when she brought your knuckles up to her lips to press a soft kiss against them. just a minute, you reminded yourself when she let your hand go.

you wish you knew before that would be the last time you'd see Natasha because then you could tell yourself to not let her go, you'd go back in time to kill ant-man before he could even give them the idea but that wasn't the case and you had to live with the repercussions of it all.

-----

your mission with thor and rocket went pretty smoothly, for the most part, you let rocket take the lead and when thor was under control, it worked out perfect. you got the stone and headed back in no time and you were happy for thor who got the closure he needed. he seemed unstoppable at that moment.

Natasha's mission was mind-boggling, she and clint sat around for moments, trying to figure out a way for the both of them to come out of this alive but there wasn't any way around this, Natasha knew what she had to do. her mind was made up as she thought of you, your smile, your voice, everything.

she knew clint had a family and there was no way she'd leave them without their dad but the thought of leaving you pained her. she knew how broken up you'd be because she promised she'd come back for you and now she wouldn't be. she hoped you could understand it one day. with shaky hands, Natasha pulled out a necklace that she swore around her neck, smiling down at the ring that she was determined to give to you one day. you'd always asked her about the random ring that hung from her neck and she'd always tell you that she just found it one day. she didn't want to tell you that it was for you, it'd ruin the surprise.

she always saw herself growing old with you and now that didn't seem possible. she wrapped her hand around the ring completely bringing it up to her lips to press a gentle kiss to it as if it was you at that moment, she wished it was. "whatever it takes." she spoke softly as she shot up from the rock she sat on. clint turned to her with tearful eyes whispering something, she couldn't listen to him right now.

"listen, clint-" she cut him off, reaching for his hand and dropping the necklace into his hand before balling it up for him. "tell her I love her okay?" tears fell past her eyes but the wind was knocked out of her when clint flipped her on her back, they fought for a moment but ultimately, she won as she dove off the cliff, stopping Clint from his demise.

there was a second of regret when clint cried out for her to hold on but then she imagined all the stress she felt for the past 5 years and she knew if she hadn't done this, her life would be full of regret. "it's okay." she smiled up at the man, tears in her own eyes. "it'll be okay." he cried even harder but before she could regret it more, she kicked herself off using the cliff and fell.

when clint opened his eyes again, he was surrounded by water, his tears clouded his vision as he opened his hand along with the soul stone, was the necklace. he wasn't thrilled about having to see you.

----- everyone cheered when they were returned to the platform, the smiles on their lips had you grinning before your eyes locked with clint's tired, tearful ones and then you noticed the empty space beside him.

"Clint." you tried but your voice shook so much when he met your eyes. "where's natty?" he didn't have to say anything for you to know that she wouldn't be coming back. your eyes filled with tears as he began apologizing to you. everyone else was too quiet and it made your cries echoed in the room.

"no... no... she was supposed to come back! where is she, clint? what did you do?" you slammed your hands against his chest when he made his way over to you. you hated him so much right now. deep down, you knew it wasn't his fault but you'd blame just about anyone right now.

"where is she?" you cried harder when he forced you into a hug, trying your hardest to break free of his hold but he was strong and after a moment, you stopped fighting. you couldn't stop your cries as the thought of never seeing the love of your life again replayed in your head. none of this made any sense, she was just here and now she was gone forever. "I'm so sorry." he cried out with you, rubbing softly at your back. when you weren’t strong enough to stand anymore, clint tugged you down on the floor with him, hugging you tightly into his embrace but nothing could ever be better than Natasha's.

she was the only one you wanted to see when you came back, she was the only one that didn't come back. your cries shook you as you tried to rack your head around it all. why couldn't she just come back? there wasn’t anything anyone could say to ever make you feel better. you just wanted to see her again and if you couldn't get that, you'd never be happy. everything was suddenly ripped away from you, you needed her.

------

you felt solemn as you sat in the church, your eyes drifted over to the empty coffin then it was the big picture that was placed beside it. there she was in all her glory, you'd do anything to have her back. tears flowed freely from your eyes as you snapped your gaze back to your hands. the funeral ended an hour ago but you didn't have the energy to move.

you couldn't do anything, what was life without Natasha? you were so wrapped up in your thought that you hardly noticed the body that sat beside you until his hand hovered over yours for a moment. "she wanted me to give you this." he spoke softly and when his hand left, the necklace laid in your hands. you stared blankly down at the familiar ring that hung from it, feeling the fresh tears stream from your eyes. "you know, she loved you." he whispered, his lips quivering as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder.

"I'd never seen her so in love before you, she was crazy about you." you let out a small laugh through your cries as you glanced up from the ring over to clint. he offered a sad smile, his free hand coming up to brush away your tears. "she'd always talk about marrying you." he whispered, nudging his head in the direction of your hands almost to explain the gift he handed you.

"I wish she was here to tell me that," you whispered, letting your head fall against his shoulder. you would've married Natasha in a heartbeat had you gotten the chance. "I know..." he spoke softly, his eyes trained on the picture of her in the front of the church. "she's a hero," he uttered, trying his best to comfort you. "she brought my family back... I just wish there was something I could do to repay her." you nodded, your eyes moving back to the perfect diamond ring, you could almost feel her on it.

you knew Natasha died a hero, she died doing what she was meant to do. it was hard to imagine your life without her but you knew in some way, she'd always be here.

#natasha romonova #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff #natasha x you #natasha #natalie rushman #black widow #black widow x reader #black widow x you #black widow x y/n #black widow x female reader #marvel #avengers #the avengers

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beskarberry · 4 years ago

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Silver and Steel

Bargaining with Beskar, Chapter 2 (The Mandalorian x f!reader)

It was then you noticed the open wall next to you. The steel panel was slid open to reveal a vault packed corner to corner with more firepower than you had ever seen in one place. Your eyes roamed from blaster to rifle to flamethrower, noticing that not all of them were made for five fingered hands. This wasn't just an armory, it was a trophy case.

Rating: Explicit

Word count: 7.5k

Content warnings: ALOT. Descriptions of violence (a little spicier than canon) blood mention, near death experiences, hurt/COMFORT, fluff, smut exhaustion sex, top!reader.

A/N: I hope y’all enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it but yeah PLEASE READ THOSE CONTENT WARNINGS!! It all works out ok in the end! Also good chunks of this was inspired by a particular filk song called Call the Navigator which I’ll link in the replies so the external link doesn’t ef up my post.

<-Previous Next->

"Med pack... junk....junk....spotchka?....is that all you've got?"

You were bent over a deep supply crate, your legs barely touching the ground while you dug through what you had hoped would be the food stock. There were several banged up tins of rations and a handful of miscellaneous junk, but nothing that looked real food. You were clean and dry after your shower, but the energy that had been spent in this very supply room just an hour or so earlier had to be replenished. "Where’s the rest of it?"

The silence coming from the cockpit was expected, but still frustrating. With a huff you grabbed two food tins and made your way through the old ship towards the ladder. At the top though a small antechamber you found your new comrade seated in the pilot chair, fussing with the buttons on the console. On either side and slightly behind his chair were two other passenger seats, though the one on his left was missing a good deal of padding. The cockpit was poorly lit save for the lighted console and the dusty starlight overhead. Though you were in the air, you could tell you were still on Tatooine. Hooray. Why are we still here? The great Dune Sea stretched out on all sides, sparsely dotted with sand people villages, but you couldn’t see any of the large space ports such as Mos Eisley or Mos Espa. In the ships’ darkness you couldn't tell what the lumpy thing was in the other chair, probably blankets or laundry. You went to toss it off the seat when a pair of huge black orbs peeped out from the heap of fabric.

"The fuck is THAT?!" You rocketed backwards, dropping the food tins in the process. The bug eyed creature made a soft cooing noise and lifted the rest of the blanket off itself, allowing two gigantic green ears to pop into view. It didn't look like a threat, in fact it looked kinda cute, but you knew it could still be dangerous. A pair of stubby three-fingered hands made grabby motions at you, the little creature giggling at your bewildered face. " Where'd you find this thing, is it some kind of pet?"

"He's not a pet." Finished fiddling with the console, Mando turned in his chair to readjust the blanket that had slumped off of the small beastie. It squealed happily and wiggled in its comfy cocoon before noticing the food tins that were still on the floor. He pointed the tiniest claw at them and chirped at you, demanding to be fed. "You'd better give him one of those before he gets mad."

It took you a moment to process what he said before scooping one of the tins off the floor, peeling back the lid and placing the dish in the seat next to the little thing. He greedily scooped the mystery mash into his tiny toothy mouth, gibbering between bites. You picked the remaining tin off the floor and leaned against the door frame, watching it happily chow down.

"If it's not a pet then what is it?"

"He's my..." the Mandalorian paused, fishing for the right words to say, "...he is my child."

That was not at all the answer you expected, if he had said emotional support gremlin you would have been less confused. The baby was still making a mess of his dinner, almost dropping his plate before Mando snatched it and set it carefully back in his lap. You had seen first hand that there was a human under all that metal plating, and your tired brain fizzled trying to make the connection between the two very different beings. Mando could tell by your puzzled face that he had some explaining to do.

He told you the tale of how he had been charged to bring the baby in as a high credit bounty, but after he used the reward to get new armor he went back and stole the child away from its captors. He talked about the Mandalorian concept of a 'foundling' and that he himself was one too. At some point you had popped your food tin open and started eating, though you were so captivated by his story that you couldn't remember doing so. When he'd finished you set your empty dish on the busted chair and gently held your hand out for the child to grab with one mush covered paw, who babbled excitedly at his new friend.

Behind you his parental guardian was rigid, ready to take you out if you made one wrong move against his precious cargo. Though he had been the one to steal you away and forgo freezing you in carbonite he still didn’t exactly trust you, your reputation as a hunter-killer was what had driven your bounty so high. He knew you were disarmed, but what else could you be capable of? However, you weren't paying mama-hen Mando any mind. Instead you let the baby play with your hand a bit before he returned to his food. You decided that the only place left to sit was on the floor. Squished into the tiny space between the passenger and pilot seats was cramped, but it gave you a fantastic view out the rounded transperisteel window into the vastness of the night sky.

“Your story sounds awful familiar.” You turned your attention to the metal clad man, watching him fidget with the steering controls. “You abandoned a guild reward for anothers wellbeing, like I did. Someone that didn’t deserve to be dragged back in cuffs. Is that why you picked up the puck on me? Some kind of kindred spirit something or other?”

“We’re nothing alike.” He was watching out the window, focused on flying the ship to unknown destinations, but he was bouncing the leg farthest away from you. So when the cogwheels turn in your head, the machine moves somewhere else. If you hadn’t experienced his human body first hand you could have easily convinced yourself he was a droid.

“Now that’s not true. You told the guild to get fucked because your moral compass was pointing the other way. I didn't just let that quarry go y'know? It was more than that. There was... there was someone she had to get back to. And the New Republic was just gonna lock her ass up and for what? It wasn't right." You remembered that Togruta woman, pointing a blaster at you with tears in her eyes and her belly swollen with a child that did not belong to the man she was being forced to marry. A few thousand credits weren’t worth another child being made an orphan, and you gave her your ship to escape in while you led hunters on a wild-bantha chase away from her. You knew it drove the guild insane but you wouldn’t have it any other way. A tiny green foot poked itself out from under the blankets by your head, bringing you out of your reverie. On reflex you tucked it back into the safety of his blankies.

Though you thankfully didn’t remember much of your early childhood, you knew you had come from Corellia. You didn’t know if you had parents or siblings, but there had been many other young street urchins in your alley behind the shipyard, and all you had then were each other. You never planned on having any kids yourself, but they were still something to be protected. At all costs, if necessary. “I’m guessing this little dude is happy with that decision.”

Mando had begun to take the ship closer to the ground, it was almost totally dark outside but you could see on the radar there was a large mountainous formation up ahead. Carefully, he landed the beat up craft on a sturdy outcropping of rocks, kicking up whirlwinds of dust and sand. Far out over the sand you could see a collection of lumpy looking ruins that were slowly succumbing to the march of the dunes. You guessed this was where your quarry was hiding out.

The baby was starting to get sleepy, his huge eyes disappearing slowly as the weight of his eyelids became too much. His little head rolled forward, threatening to toss him off his seat. Your big mean bounty hunter heart couldn’t take it, so you scrambled to your feet and scooped the baby up in your arms, sitting down in his seat to get him situated in your lap. He fussed and squirmed a bit, but you had learned a no-fail trick from the Corellian ship builders that would often help to sneak orphaned children onto their ships and off that skughole of a planet towards a better life. Many years ago they had done the same for you.

“Oh, I have sailed the midnight sea from Hoth to Arvala-5.

Seen the Cloudshape Falls of Alderaan, met rocks that were alive.

But soon I came to realize as world to world I roamed,

That nowhere in the galaxy could really be my home.”

The songs you knew were often sang by whole crews of starship sailors, loud enough to shake their durasteel walls, but you dropped your voice low and soft to turn the star-shanty into a lullaby. The baby was watching you with glittering eyes, he had stopped his wiggling and curled up tightly against your chest.

“So call the navigator, set the course and go!

We've stars and planets to explore, my wild heart tells me so.

Beneath the metal decking I can hear the engine sigh

And all I need is a mighty ship and a staaaa-aarr to guide her by”

A tiny yawn betrayed his wondrous eyes, and he gave up and closed them shut, rubbing his little hands on his face. You lowered your voice to almost a whisper.

“I've seen a million beauties and I've known a million fears,

And life is what I've found between the laughter and the tears.

Still I will sail the last frontier through worlds both tame and wild,

And marvel at their strangeness with the wonder of a child”

Soft snores were your only applause, the baby having drifted off mid stanza. You hummed a few more lines of the song to be sure he was asleep. The cockpit was as dark as the surrounding sky, but the glint of silver caught your attention. Starlight reflected off the beskar plates in a way that made the black of his visor seem darker than the heart of a collapsed star, and just as deadly. The Mandalorian was watching you intently, completely motionless.

The precious moment with the baby had made you very forgetful of the dangerous situation you were actually in. You had been captured, you were this man’s prisoner and yet here you were all cozy in the chair with his adopted son in your lap. You glared back at him, matching his fierce gaze when the little green bundle moved to get more comfortable, one tiny hand catching claws in the top you were wearing; a tunic that did not belong to you.

“Here, you take him then.” Your voice was hushed so as not to wake the child, and you raised him up gently to try and unhook him from your shirt. Immediately there were two gloved hands coming to lift the baby off of your lap. He was a monolith of leather and metal, but the way he pulled his son in close was so gentle that all the ferocity of his profession dissipated like mist. Mando carefully tucked the blanket under the sleeping little baby and wrapped him up tight before slowly turning away from you and the flight deck to head down the ladder in total silence, leaving you alone in the dark.

You watched him go, the top of his shiny silver head disappearing into the floor. Without the sounds of life in the cockpit the quiet of the night weighed heavy on your ears. He still hadn’t told you why he had kept you out of the carbonite, all you had done was let him use you as his personal play-thing... and maybe murder off some of his bounty hunting competition, but that wasn’t much to go off of. You had done worse for much less. Put your skills to better use, that’s what he had said. Absently you toyed with the end of your sleeve, no, not your sleeve. His sleeve.

That was another thing, what reason did he have to show you hospitality when his first interaction with you had been so violent? Binding you and marching your ass through the desert after he had fucking shot you. Your escape plan had almost worked, ha! All you would’ve had to do is tire him out and run but that had backfired entirely. The apex of your thighs still thrummed with sensation, warm and blissful. Though you’d had lovers in the past you usually didn’t still feel them so deeply afterwards. The smell of the fresher soap still clung to your body and clothes. Clutching at the collar of your sweater you pulled it to your face and breathed deep, letting the heady scent of it fill your lungs.

“Let’s go. We have work to do.” The modulated voice coming from the ladder startled you from your guilty indulgence and sprang you to your feet, but the source of the voice was already back down the ladder. You sheepishly followed suit.

“You plan on telling me what we’re up to exactly?” Down below the Mandalorian was loading himself with ammunition, each and every slot on his many bandoliers was packed to the brim with charges. His pulse rifle was slung over one shoulder, clanking up against a new piece of equipment you hadn’t seen before. Some kind of jet pack maybe.

“I have two bounties to catch on Tatooine. One of them conveniently fell into a sarlacc pit. The other one's hiding out down there." A bounty fob blinked red in his hand; quick flashes indicated that the target was close by. “If you help me with this, you’re off the hook. I’ll tell Karga you’re dead and the guild will stop sending hunters after you. But-” He turned to face you, he was holding your beat-up old back pack by one ratty leather strap. "If for one second I think you'll turn against me, I'll take the half credits for your corpse."

"You're one to talk!" You hissed, storming up to the gunslinger with the ferocity of a lothcat. "You kidnapped me! I didn't ask to be here."

The man in question didn't budge under your verbal assault. "Do we have a deal or not?"

He forced your backpack into your arms to accentuate his point. You ripped it from his grasp and stormed to the other side of the cabin. Everything was still inside; a pack of bacta patches, a few mementos, three busted tracking fobs and some blaster charges. Speaking of blaster-

"Where’s my gun, Mando?" Your question was answered when you turned back to face him. He was holding it by its barrel, extending the grip towards you. You met his visor with contempt, but took the old blaster from him carefully as not to cause a misfire. It would be nice to not be on the run from a guild you had pledged your loyal services to for so many years, that now wanted you delivered back to them in carbonite; and you knew that Karga would trust his favorite hunter. The life of a moisture farmer wasn’t what you dreamed of when you escaped Corellia. Fuck that. "Yeah, it's a deal. One hunt and I'm gone."

If he didn't want you to ogle his wares he should have closed the panel, but instead he joined you at the wall, picking up some extra plasma cartridges and a vibroblade with a curved handle, which he pushed into your hands. "Will that be enough?"

Either you trust me or you don't, pick a side, tin can. You didn't answer him right away, opting to pull a chest holster and another couple of blasters down from the wall. You cinched the holsters tight and tucked a blaster in on either side, slung a disruptor over your back and stuffed the knife in your boot. Once you had everything in place you stuck your fists on your hips like a superhero with a confidant nod. "Yeah, that should be good."

Mando was watching you with intensity, his visor going over each of your weapon choices. He tugged on your holsters’ cross straps to make sure they were secured. You rolled your eyes at him, "I know how to dress myself, sir."

No answer. Typical. He stopped fussing with your straps and turned back to the wall, selecting a heavy multi-ammo bandolier. He stepped closer to you, wrapping both arms around your waist to fit the belt in place on your hips. You tried to convince yourself that it was the cool beskar of his chest plate pressed up against you that sent a shiver down your spine. The physical contact was over as quickly as it had been initiated, and then he was back in the vault fishing out the tiny silver explosives that fit neatly into the circular latches on either side of your belt, handing them to you without a word. Finished with his selection he pressed a few buttons on his vambrace, one to slide the armory shut and another to summon an egg-shaped hover crib to float to his side. Inside its shell the child was sound asleep, a heart-melting smile on his tiny little face. As adorable as he was, you furrowed your brow in confusion.

“Is he coming too?”

“Where I go, he goes.” Mando said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. He strode back to the supply crate you had been digging through earlier and packed a handful of rations into a bag for the journey through the dunes. Cool desert air gusted into the stuffy cabin as the access ramp fell open, and the three of you headed out into the darkness of Tatooine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your dreams were hazy and feverish, shots of blaster fire flickered through the fog from unknown assailants. The smell of blood and blast plasma strong in your nose even while unconscious. You saw the sneering face of a Twi’lek twist in agony and purple blood painted his face before he winked out of existence, replaced in your mindscape with bloody hands. Your hands. Then there was cold beskar on your cheek and strong arms hauling you from the carnage. Harsh wind in your ears and the ground spiraling away beneath you. The howling wind so loud you couldn't hear the questions being barked in your face. Pain, the smell of burning skin, then nothing. You felt objects moving frantically nearby, and something soft and green was pressing into your ribs. Your eyes, heavy as they were, fluttered open to see two huge black orbs staring up from your side where bright red blood was staining the sheets under you. Is that ... my blood?

“Hey green bean...what’cha up to?” Your voice was hoarse and weak, scratching its way out reluctantly past chapped lips. Talking made your head pound, you reached up to cradle your aching skull when two leather tipped hands caught yours and held them steady.

“Easy... Don’t move too much. Please.” Your hands were gently set back down at your sides, shooting pain up your arms. A large black and silver body was hunched beside you, frantically sticking bacta patches to your skin.

“Mand...do? What…what happened?” Your voice was barely a whisper, so faint the recycled air of the cabin threatened to whisk it away.

“You got the bastard, but that fucking Twi' managed to get a shot off in your gut point blank before he went down. You shouldn't have survived that but you did.” Is that a compliment? He was wrapping a long gauze bandage around your arm, fixing the bacta patches in place so they could do their thing. It hurt, but not as much as you thought it should have. Down by your side the child had rolled into you face first, passed out cold next to an emergency cauterizer. Mando nodded at his sleeping son, “And if it wasn’t for him, you’d be dead for sure.”

The baby? How is he involved with this? Thoughts echoed loudly in your skull, and you decided that thinky time was over. The little guy had the right idea, you should sleep now, embrace the comfort of the dark behind your eyes, let it swallow you whole.

“Hey hey hey! Not yet. Stay with me, ok? You need to drink something. Here.” An armored hand slid under your head, urging you to sit up just enough to take a drink out of the metal canteen pressed against your lips. “You need to stay awake, just for a little while.” Cool water graced your dry mouth and dripped onto your chin. Embarrassed by your mess you tried to wipe the droplets away but once again your arms were halted in place. A rough piece of fabric dabbed at your face.

“I’m not a baby, Mando. I can take care of myself.” The creeping sting of blast-burn that still scalded your skin told you that might not be true. The bacta was just starting to seep into your bloodstream, but it would take some time to work its magic.

“I know that. I was with you down there in the fray. A rancor would have been less terrifying to face than you. But right now I need you to hold still.”

Another compliment? Or was that sarcasm? You’re losing your edge, tin man. You tried to roll your eyes but the effort made your head spin; you glanced around the cabin, trying to avoid meeting the visor that was pinning you to the cot. Strewn about the floor of the ship was what was left of your holsters and weapons, splattered with red and purple blood. You couldn’t be sure, but it looked like one belt had been blasted to smithereens, torn strips of leather the only indication it had been there at all. Farther away you saw a dark block in the carbonite freezer. The Twi’lek from your nightmare was frozen solid, though from his limp posture you guessed he had stopped moving long before he was put in the chamber. One of his long lekku had been cut clean off, and even in carbonite you could see the wound was fresh. Something long and curved stuck victoriously out of the center of his chest. Your vibroblade, lodged to the hilt in his sternum.

Mando was still kneeling on the floor by your side, and though you couldn’t see his face his hunched shoulders gave you the feeling that he was distraught. He still had your head resting in his palm, his thumb absently toying with your hair. Maybe it was the bacta running through your system that made you start to feel warm and gooey on the inside, but the sensation of his hand on your scalp felt... nice. Nice to be touched in a way that wasn't just for survival. Though you had already felt his hands on your body this was something else entirely. Sincere. Maybe it was just the first time somebody near you wasn't trying to kill or capture you. You foolish girl, you've already been captured. Are you so lonely that a gentle touch makes you melt? Maybe it's you that's losing your edge.

"You should have left me for dead, cashed in on that half credit reward."

"That is not The Way." His mantra was rehearsed, spoken as easily as he drew breath, but you could hear the exhaustion in his voice.

“Well... thank you for not letting me bleed out.” You could see the top of the baby's green little noggin still curled up against your side, though the part of your ribs he was leaning on didn’t have a single mark. You looked for the blast wound that Mando was supposedly talking about, but aside from a handful of plasma burns your skin was smooth and healthy; the pool of dried blood under you was the only indication anything had been there at all. What kind of mando magic is that? And what did he mean about the child? Your first thought was how disappointed you were there wouldn’t be a good scar. Your second was realizing your top was missing. Shreds of it were still on your shoulders, but the front had been ripped off completely to get to your vanished wounds. Mando seemed like he didn’t even care, he had been so focused on patching you up that the idea of modesty was thrown out the window, but you couldn’t help teasing him. “There’s not a scratch on me, Mando. You just wanted me topless, didn’t you?”

His thumb on your scalp froze, his visor going from your face to your chest with rapid snaps. Without letting your head drop he used his other hand to tear his cloak from his back and throw it over you and the sleeping baby. “Better?”

Party pooper. “Yes, thank you.” Why is he being so nice? He must have ulterior motives, right? Why keep me alive if not to cash in on that bounty? You decided to push his buttons some more. “This bed sucks. Is this why you're so crotchety? Because you sleep on this Maker-forsaken thing? It’s making my back hurt.”

The cot you were on was spartan at best, more of a cloth covered bucket than a bed. It was recessed into the wall opposite of the armory, bits of machinery and droid parts hanging over the space above you. There wasn’t much of a gap between your head and the durasteel plating of the ship’s hull. Your teasing was rewarded with a long, tired sigh. The hand that cushioned your head moved down to your shoulders, pushing on you so that you sat up straight. You scooped the baby off of your side and into your arms, trying to ignore the dried blood from your wounds that stained the sheets before swaddling the sleeping bean in his father’s cloak. The metal man rose from the floor, letting go of you just long enough to remove his cross-belts and unlatch his chest plate, setting them on the floor with a dull thunk. He squished himself between the wall and your back, his dorsal plate scraping loudly without its cape. He scooched one armored leg around you until it was between your hip and the wall on your side, pulling you into his lap and turning his whole body into a pillow, letting your torso rest on his. He was used to the sharp metal bed frame, but that didn’t mean you should be subjected to it.

“Is this ok?”

You could only nod, your cheeks flushing red with a mix of emotions. It was more than ok, his formidable body was warm and comfortable. His arms wrapped around your waist, helping to support not only you but also his foundling. The spice of him was strong now with him on your back, worn leather and metal and that damn fresher soap that was making a fool out of you. Underneath his steady breathing the sound of something rhythmic caught your attention, it was quick and faint, but unmistakably the sound of his heartbeat. His heart is racing. Listen to that engine purr.

Behind you a man with a name you may never know watched your chest slowly rise and fall with each breath, not with lust but something unfamiliar though not unwelcome. He could hear his heartbeat pounding in his ears, whether from the ordeal of keeping you alive or the fact that you were in his arms again he couldn't be sure. He sighed, trying to convince himself to calm down, but the deep breath he took only flooded his senses with the essence of you, threatening to melt the beskar off his head with the heat rushing to his face. He couldn't help the way his fingers traced over your skin, careful not to undo any of the bacta patches. He jumped slightly when your hands found his, but the weight of the child still in your arms made it difficult to reach your fingers. The glove you were touching was suddenly empty, and a bare hand snaked out from under the cloak that kept you modest. With the press of a button the child’s pram floated its way over to you from the supply crates. The baby’s adopted father carefully lifted the sleeping creature off your lap and into his hover crib, another button press on the vambrace and the shield door slid closed.

His hand returned to the safety of the cloak, pulling the other glove off before finding your fingers again. His skin was so warm you couldn't help but imagine his hands somewhere more intimate. Evil, evil bacta... Maybe you wouldn't have to.

"I should thank you properly." It was impossible to hide the tiredness of your voice, but he was close enough you only needed to whisper. His grasp tightened around you, your once plush pillow was now a rigid wall of muscle.

"You should go to sleep." the sound of his baritone words so close to your ear made your skin prickle. Too late for that. Slowly you guided his hand down your belly until your tangled hands bumped into your belt line. A low growl rumbled out of the modulator. “Cyar'ika... you need to rest."

The alien term of endearment made you hum, but you ignored his words of warning and pushed his hand under the tough fabric till his fingertips found your heat, both of you gasping softly at first contact. His free hand fumbled with your button, and after some difficulty you undid it for him along with the zipper. With space to work, with his wrist moved freely, lazily rolling a calloused fingertip against your clit; remembering his lesson from the first time he experienced your body, his touch was light as a feather.

There wasn’t much you could do for him in the position you were in, so you leaned back against him and relaxed, letting him enjoy you at his own pace. The bottom of his helmet was pressed into the crook of your neck, and though it was sharp you could feel something warm and soft underneath it. So there is a real man under there. Scruffy stubble brushed at your skin and sent goosebumps down your chest. Under the beskar his eyes followed the prickling trail that lead under the tattered cloak you still wore to your breasts, watching the way the fabric pointed where your nipples grew hard for him. His other hand couldn’t resist finding its way to your pert peaks, rolling them between his fingers in that way he knew flushed you with heat. Soft gasps rewarded his ears as he worked at your breast and clit, rubbing them in tandem. Your hips rolled into one hand and your back arched into the other, urging him to help you build your climax. He obliged, adding a second finger to pinch your clit softly between strong digits until you fell apart around him.

The pressure that was building behind you and pressing into your spine told you that if you wanted more from him you would have to give him a better angle. You started to get up, but the hands on your sensitive spots held you in place.

“What about your injuries? I don’t want to hurt you.” What injuries? There’s nothing left! His voice was filled with sincerity, a far cry from your first encounter. You didn’t answer him, instead you found each of his hands and squeezed them with a hum, asking him to trust that the bacta had set in and made you comfortable enough to move from your impromptu med bay. He slid his fingers out from your burning core, dragging the wetness from your cunt over your skin until his palms were on your back, helping to push you up off of him. The teeny tiny bed frame made it difficult to spin yourself around until you were facing him, and even more difficult to kick your pants off as you passed over top of him, but he never took his hands away from you to keep you steady until you were seated in his lap.

Straddling his waist you rolled your hips over where his cock was hidden from you, making him shudder under your legs. His arms glided from your knees to your hips, languidly making their way up your sides and past your breasts to the last remaining tatters of the black knit sweater he had allowed you to wear. Hooking a thumb under its ruined edges, he slid it up over your arms and cast it away into the darkness of the ship. His hands went right back to working at your breasts, massaging them like dough in time with your grinding hips. You took a moment to admire how he looked underneath you, his remaining armor glinting in the hazy ship light as his hands searched for every sensitive inch of your chest. You knew from legend that his helmet could never be removed in front of you, but you’d never heard anything about the rest of his clothes. Where his chest plate had been was a strappy flak jacket dotted with magnetic fasteners. Your hands went slowly to the first clasp, and the hands that were so indulged in you froze, his body stiff between your legs.

“Is this ok?” The irony of you repeating his question from earlier back to him made your lips turn in a sly smile.

“Y-yes.” His voice was nearly imperceptible, and you realized that he was shaking. You looked to his visor, watching him nod in consent before you continued. He dropped his hands to your hips, pulling down on your thighs and rutting up into you while you busied yourself with the complicated under armor until it fell away at his sides, revealing a pair of suspenders and an identical black knit tunic as the one that had been shredded off of you. You didn’t have the energy to peel every article of clothing off of him, so this would have to do. Without his cloak bunched around his shoulders you were able to see the flesh of his throat, so warm and inviting that you wanted to sink your teeth into it.

You bent down to nibble at the exposed skin, and the filthy moan that rattled out of the helmet sent shivers down your spine. The taste of him was exquisite, better than you could have imagined under all that fabric and leather. The overwhelming cocktail of his scent straight from the source made you bold. You kissed your way around the edge of his helmet where the metal met his skin until you found his pulse point and made good on your desires. His body convulsed when you bit down, sucking at the tender skin until you left blooming marks that would be there for days.

“Cyar'ika... Please...“ There was that word again, you didn’t know what it meant but the way he breathed it like a prayer felt like warm honey in your belly. Releasing his tormented neck you ran your hands down his broad chest until your thumbs bumped the leather suspenders that lead you down to his waist line where you were able to tug the edge of his shirt free, giving you a delicious window of his tummy; well-muscled and dusted with dark brown hair.

“What’s wrong, tin man? Nobody ever touch you like this before?” He was still shaking while you ran your hands under the edge of his shirt and through the soft treasure trail of fuzz from the top of his belt line to the bottom of his ribs. He couldn’t answer you, his breath caught in his throat at the sensation of your hands on his skin, but you were starting to put the pieces of his puzzle together. No, probably not.

You decided not to torture him any longer. The fabric of his pants was nearly stretched to capacity and wet with your slick. You had to stretch one leg out onto the floor to get enough of a footing to lift yourself high enough off him that you could free him from the canvas prison. His cock nearly burst out of its confines, and your face flushed red at the sight of him standing proudly at attention, twitching in your hands with a flood of shimmering precum made just for you.

His chest was heaving, ragged breaths forcing their way out of his modulator before you’d even taken his length. You used your hips to notch him at your entrance and his grip on your thighs clenched like a steel trap. Slowly you lowered yourself onto him, letting him fill you until you were stretched wide. Your eyes met his visor, though from the way it was tilted you knew he was watching himself disappear into you. His arms wrapped tightly under your ass as he thrust into you hard enough that he lifted you off the cot, quickly scooting both your bodies down the bed until he was flat on his back. You tried to stay upright, but his pounding soon had your head spinning until you were falling forward into his chest, digging your arms around his shoulders in a way you were becoming familiar with. Your hands found their way to the back of his helmet to where his hair line started, sneaking a few fingers under the metal edge to tangle in his curls. The Mandalorian’s hands were on your waist, holding you in place while he rocketed up into you, filling the ships cabin with the sound of wet slaps. His thick cock hit different from this angle, grinding up against the sweet spot deep inside you with each rut until you started seeing stars behind your eyes. He could feel you building up around him and he quickened his pace until you were gasping his name.

“M-mando! I... I’m gonna....” Your muscles coiled with heat until you burst, your sweet cunt fluttering around his still pumping cock until he went cascading over the edge of ecstasy with you, his helmet vibrating with a guttural roar. His feverish body shook, giving you a few short thrusts to milk the cum from his cock until it spilled out from where he was lost inside you.

His shaky arms held onto you so tightly, as if you would blast away into space if he let go. The endorphins flooding his head made him want to pour his heart out and tell you everything, bare himself in body and soul for the first time in his life. He wanted to tell you how nice you had looked in his clothes, how the loose knit fabric draped over your breasts was a work of art; even more so when you were standing before him armed to the teeth in his hunting trophies. How seeing you slice that fucking Twi’lek to ribbons was more graceful than any ballet. The sight of the bloody hole that had been burned into your side had made his skin crawl. Mando wasn’t ready to explain the child’s healing powers, he barely understood them himself; but if it wasn’t for the baby he would have been burying your corpse instead of tending your wounds. Instead of experiencing your living body like he was now.

His heart fluttered at the thought of his foundling healing you with his baby sorcerer magic, his tiny green paws pushed on your side where the blood was spilling from your wound. The thought of you dying for his bounty made him sick, but pride flushed the sensation away when he thought back to that first day with you up in the flight deck. How when his baby boy was restless that you acted, not with malice but with tenderness and care. He'd never wanted to rip his helmet off faster in all his days than when you sang his son a lullaby, the sweet tune of it filtering through his sensory equipment, and he longed to hear it as it was meant to be. In that moment he had been entranced, but the fierce glare of his visor had made you feel threatened. He didn't want that. He wanted to make you feel safe. The same way you had made his child feel, the same way you made him feel now. Like the galaxy itself couldn’t tear you from him.

But the ugly truth was that soon it would all end when you both went your separate ways. All the feelings he wanted to confess to you died in his mouth, leaving a bitter taste that brought him back to reality. You still straddled his waist, and though the blood had long since left his cock it still sat neatly in your heat, letting him feel your gentle heartbeat around him. Carefully he pulled himself free from the apex of your thighs and rolled you both sideways onto the unforgiving cot, letting gravity shuffle you down until you were nestled in the crook of his arm. He couldn’t help brushing a stray lock of hair from your face, meeting your half lidded eyes with his own behind the visor.

“I don’t think I can get to the fresher this time.” Your voice was barely a whisper, and the edges of sleep crept unbidden to your eyes; the traumatic activities of the day finally winning over your endurance. “You’re probably going to have to burn these sheets.”

Mando hummed with indifference, though for you he would burn all of Tatooine down if you asked. All the lovely thoughts that had danced through his mind came rolling through again, haloed in the warm light of afterglow. Only one made its way past his lips, sneaking out of the helmets’ modulator like a prayer.

“How does the song end?”

“Mmm?” You were so close to sleep, so cozy and full of cum that you knew would be a fun mess for morning-you to clean up. You wracked your brain trying to remember what the hell he was talking about. The star-shanty? “Why, do you need a lullaby too?”

“N-no. Just curious. When you leave, my foundling might ask me about it.” Liar. The calloused hand gliding up and down your spine brought the original contract you made with him ringing through your skull. One hunt and I’m gone.

“Leave? I’m not going anywhere until I see you tell Karga face to face that I’m rotting in a sarlacc pit. No take-backs. That old dog will probably dance when he hears he won’t have to part with his credits and I want to catch it on holo-corder.”

The rumbling sigh deep in his chest sounded more like an engine powering down than a mortal man, and it told you more than words ever could. The arm you had around his chest was met with strong fingers that intertwined with your own. He doesn’t want me to go. Who are you, Mandalorian?

“Tell me anyway? Please?” His arms tightened like a fortress around you. His words were distant, echoing out from somewhere in dreamland instead of right by your ear. Alright you big softie, if you’re going to beg me. You sighed heavily against him, trying to recall the songs of your distant past.

“The nights are long between the stars, and lonely too for me,

I wonder how I might have fared with home and family.

But the bonds of friendship I have formed will last my lifetime through,

Security is not for me, my dreams are all of you.”

The same soft snores that had been your original encore with the baby now ghosted in your ear, muffled by the mysterious beskar helmet but still unmistakable. Like father like son.

The weight of his arms around you was like nothing you had ever felt in your years on the run. You had traveled so far and met so many living beings but not once had you let another share your bed while you slept. You could get used to this. The thought was the last you had before sleep overtook you, your body slumping against his while you dreamed of silver and steel.

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theres-an-impulstor-among-us · 4 years ago

Note

Writting request!

Hels!Impulse taking regular impulses place n stuffing him in like a closet or somethin-

N someone who's sus of him (maybe iskall?) Finds the real impulse.

Now to unmask the fake.

okay so a few quick things:

1) this ended up a LOT longer than i expected lol so i apologise for that, it’s over 2k words

2) i also didn’t entirely stick to every detail in the prompt because i had an idea i rly liked and i wanted to roll with it, so i’m rly sorry if it’s not as good as you were expecting

3) anyway i hope it’s good! it was a lot of fun to work on

...

Impulse is working on the redstone of his pumpkin and melon farm in his base when he spots a shadow moving around right at the corner of his vision. Frowning, he leaves his task and heads out into the main part of the base, looking around. “Hello?” he calls cautiously. “Grian, if this is you again…”

He gets no response.

Just as he starts to turn back, thinking he just imagined it, something slams into him and knocks him into the wall, stunning him. He looks sharply up to find…

...himself.

Impulse’s eyes widen. “Wh-Who are you?!”

The new Impulse has his arms crossed and a malicious grin on his face. “My name is Impulstor. I’m your Hels counterpart. And I’m going to take over your life as my own.”

“W-Wait, what?!”

Before Impulse can move, Impulstor seizes his lapels and drags him across the base. Impulse struggles as hard as he can but he’s still winded from being hit against the wall.

Impulstor takes him to one of the support pillars at the very edge of the base, which has a two by one block hole in it, left over from Grian’s secret base shenanigans a few weeks ago. Weakened, he’s unable to stop Impulstor from shoving him roughly through the gap.

Since the floor is a block lower than the bottom of the hole, Impulse’s foot slips and he falls heavily against the wall, hitting his head and stunning him even more. The space inside the pillar is only one block by one block, with two or three more blocks of space above his head, so as Impulse collapses, he’s forced into an uncomfortable sitting position.

Blinking back tears of pain and fear, Impulse tries sluggishly to escape but Impulstor bashes him on the head with his own pickaxe.

The last thing Impulse sees before he passes out is Impulstor blocking the gap with white concrete, trapping him in this prison.

…

Zedaph flies over the shopping district and lands a little way off from Impulse and Tango, who are sitting on one of the benches outside town hall, chatting. As he approaches, the two look up and spot him. “Hey, Zed!” Tango calls, beaming. “Wanna join me and Impy hanging out?”

“Yeah, sure! What do you have in mind?”

“Well, I thought we might go give Decked Out a group run,” Tango says. “I’d have to fix things up a little bit but that shouldn’t take more than ten minutes. I think it’d be epic to go in as a team.”

“Ooh, yeah!” Impulse grins. “I always loved that game. It terrifies me, but I loved it. Those ravagers, man. I’m always on the lookout for them and it’s terrifying with the heartbeat and everything.”

“That was the idea,” snickers Tango.

“I know, I know. Doesn’t make it any less terrifying, though.” Impulse grins. “Going in as a group would be great! I’d really like to do that.”

Zedaph involuntarily takes a step back. He doesn’t know what, but there’s something off about Impulse today. There’s something different, something he can’t quite put his finger on. He’s known Impulse a long time, but not as long as Tango, who doesn’t seem to share his doubts. Is he misreading the situation?

“Yeah, me too!” Tango enthuses. “You up for it, Zed?”

“Um, actually…” Zedaph forces a convincing cough and rubs his stomach. “I feel kinda sick all of a sudden. I think the flight over here churned my insides.”

“Oh.” Tango frowns sympathetically. “You’d better rest, then.”

“Yeah, sorry. I need to go home.”

“No problem, man. Hope you feel better.”

Zedaph slowly walks away, keeping up his charade in case the others are watching. Over his shoulder, he hears Impulse say something about his ice farm, then a few seconds later, the sound of rockets are heard as the two take off with their elytras.

He keeps going for about a minute longer, just in case, before deeming it safe and taking off with his rockets. His heart pounding, he shoots over to Impulse’s base and after crashing through the water curtain, lands neatly on the ground inside. “Impulse?” Zedaph calls, starting to rush through the pyramid base. “Impulse, are you here?”

Zedaph’s voice awakens Impulse. Blinking against the throbbing in his head, he bashes his fist against the wall of the pillar as hard as he can. “Ze-Zedaph! ZED!”

Following the sound of Impulse’s voice, Zedaph locates the pillar and slices a hole in it with his pickaxe.

To his horror, he finds Impulse squeezed inside the narrow gap, blood still dripping from the wound in his head.

“Oh my god…!”

Zedaph drags Impulse out of the pillar and lets him lie flat on the ground for a moment while he tends to his wound. Impulse doesn’t even have the strength to wince at the stinging of antiseptic.

“Are you okay?” asks Zedaph quietly. “How long have you been stuck in there?”

“A-A few hours at most, I don’t really know. What’s going on?”

“Well, fake you is cosying up to Tango. I don’t think Tango suspects anything.”

Impulse swallows back a pang of hurt. “Oh… I-I thought he knew me better than that…”

“To be fair, whoever’s masquerading as you is really, really good,” says Zedaph slowly. “I hate to say this, but even I barely noticed.”

“Really? What made you catch on?”

Zedaph hesitates. “It was more of a gut feeling than solid evidence. I dunno, there was just something about the way he talked that seemed off. It didn’t seem like you. I thought either there was something wrong with you or it wasn’t you at all.”

“And you came to the conclusion that an imposter posing as me was more likely than me having an off day?” chuckles Impulse weakly.

Zedaph matches his chuckle as he starts to wind a bandage around Impulse’s head. “Again, it was just a gut feeling.”

“Well, your gut feeling was right. Now what do we do about Impulstor?”

Zedaph immediately bursts out a laugh. “Impulstor!”

Impulse gives him a look.

Zedaph clears his throat awkwardly. “S-Sorry. Anyway, we should go and save Tango from, uh… Impulstor.”

“Shouldn’t that be easy?” remarks Impulse. “I mean, I’M me. He’s not.”

“Man, you didn’t see the way he was with Tango. He has to be some kind of clone of you or something; there’s no way he’s just a guy who’s studied the way you behave. It’s not about us not knowing you well enough; it’s him knowing every mannerism, every quirk, every facial tick. If it wasn’t for my random gut feeling, I doubt we’d have noticed for a really long time.”

Impulse’s worry increases. If Tango, someone he’s known for over a decade, couldn’t even tell the difference between him and the imposter, his clone could have the whole server fooled within hours.

“We have to get to him away from the other hermits,” Impulse says. “The longer this goes on, the harder it’ll be to convince them I’m the real Impulse. What were him and Tango doing when you left?”

“I think they were taking a look at your ice farm,” responds Zedaph.

Impulse shoots bolt upright. “Oh no! I spent ages getting that farm the exact way I wanted; he better not ruin anything!”

Zedaph grips him by the shoulders. “Hey, easy, man. You might have a concussion.”

“I don’t care! Tango is in real danger and so is everything I’ve ever built! I’m going over to my ice farm right now and you can’t stop me.”

Zedaph hesitates. He knows his friend well enough to know that he really can’t stop him. “Okay, then. I’ll come with you.”

…

“-really like this pattern,” Tango is saying, looking down at the floor underneath the ice farm. “How’d you think of it?”

“Oh, it just came to me,” says Impulstor. “Took me a while to turn all the powder to concrete.”

“I bet. Nice farm, dude!”

“Thanks!”

Impulstor watches Tango move over to the side of the farm and look down. Tango clearly suspects nothing; if he has any doubts, he’s doing an amazing job hiding them. But Impulstor isn’t worried. From his (no, not his. Impulse’s) memories of Tango, he should be fairly easy to take down if the need arises.

But what he doesn’t anticipate is his ruse falling apart so soon.

“TANGO!”

Tango jerks and snaps his head upwards to find two figures flying towards him. He blinks in shock; one of them is clearly Zedaph but the other… It can’t be…

Impulstor lets out a very quiet growl, before rearranging his face into an expression of shock. “Wait a sec…”

Impulse nearly falls over in his haste as he lands, him and Zedaph getting between Tango and Impulstor.

“What the hell is going on?!” Tango demands. “Why are there two Impulses?!”

“He’s an imposter,” declares Impulse, jabbing a finger at Impulstor. “He’s a fake Impulse.”

“No, HE’s the fake!” Impulstor snaps back. “I don’t know what’s going on here but I’m the real Impulse!”

“Oh god, this is my worst nightmare,” Tango groans. “How are we supposed to know who the real one is?”

“Look, ask me anything,” says Impulse. “I’ll answer any question you ask.”

“What was your first build when you joined Hermitcraft?” Zedaph asks.

“The witch huts in season three,” say both Impulse and Impulstor at the same time, causing the former to stare at the latter in shock.

“Who did you team up with to do the pirate ship prank in season six?” Tango asks slowly.

“Ren and Doc,” both Impulses say, again at the same time.

“What did you call your season five base?” Zedaph says.

Again, the answer comes simultaneously from both Impulse and Impulstor: “Atlantis.”

“Okay, stop, stop.” Tango waves his hands. “This is going nowhere. I don’t know HOW you two have the exact same memory but clearly, we’re not gonna make any progress this way.”

“Hey, Impulse.” Zedaph turns pointedly to the real Impulse. “How did you get that scar on your thigh?”

“From an arrow wound during the season six civil war,” Impulse and Impulstor reply.

A split second later, Impulse realises what his friend is doing. He lifts his shorts leg just enough for the small scar to become visible. “This one.”

The other three turn to Impulstor, who realises he’s in trouble here. He may have Impulse’s memories but they don’t share a body. Impulstor remembers the exact moment Impulse got that injury but he wasn’t actually there. He didn’t live it; Impulse did.

“Impulse, if you’re the real one, show us the scar,” Tango says sternly.

Impulstor hesitates, his slightly narrowed eyes flickering from Tango to Impulse.

Suddenly, Impulstor takes off running, deliberately slamming into Tango as he does. Tango tumbles to the ground and slides right over the edge of the farm with a terrified yell.

Luckily, Zedaph reacts quickly and grabs his friend’s wrist. This stops Tango from falling long enough for Impulse to take hold of his friend’s other hand, and the two pull Tango back to safety.

“Oh my gosh, are you okay?!” gasps Impulse. “You almost went over!”

Breathing heavily, Tango starts to speak but cuts himself off as he finally registers the bandage around Impulse’s head. “I-Impulse, did he hurt you?”

“What?” Impulse frowns, before remembering his head injury, which is already mostly healed. “Oh, yeah. He ambushed me in my base and knocked me out and stuffed me in the hollow space in one of my pillars for like five hours or so.”

“Oh my god...” Tango squeezes his eyes shut. “I-I’m so sorry…”

“Wh-What?” Impulse stares at him. What for?”

“For not realising he wasn’t you. I should have seen it; I can’t believe I was so blind.”

Impulse blinks. “Oh, Tango, no. Please, please don’t feel guilty. It’s not your fault at all.”

“But…” Tango’s eyes glisten with tears. “I… I’ve known you for at least ten years. Surely I…”

“No,” says Impulse firmly. “Don’t blame yourself, Tango. Impulstor is… He’s me. Essentially.”

“What do you mean, Impusle?” asks Zedaph quietly.

Impulse hesitates. “Impulstor is my Hels counterpart. He looks like me, talks like me, he has all my memories. Tango, nobody can really blame you for not noticing. Dude, I know I’m the real Impulse and even I did a double take. You know I’m not observant at all but that was taking it to a whole new level.”

Tango gives a quiet laugh. “Yeah, you’re really not super observant. But still…”

“And hey, at least we now have a fairly easy way to tell us apart,” Impulse adds. “He won’t be able to fool you two again. But the rest of the server needs to be warned and briefed on how to tell us apart. Will you help me do that, both of you?”

“Of course I will,” says Zedaph immediately, putting his arm over Impulse’s shoulders. “We’re a team.”

Tango meets Impulse’s gaze.

Finally, he says, “I always knew you’d have an evil twin but I didn’t expect him to be LESS annoying than you.”

“Hey,” complains Impulse mildly. “Give me some credit for not trying to murder you.”

Tango laughs and grabs his friend in a hug. “Don’t worry, you’re still my favourite Impulse.”

Impulse hugs him back. “Good. Now, let’s find Xisuma and warn him about Impulstor.”

Tango pulls sharply away from Impulse and stares at him. “Wait… Is that his NAME? Impulse plus imposter?”

“Uh huh. Trust me, I didn’t choose it.”

His friend bursts out laughing. “That’s GREAT! Oh my god. That sounds like something Zed would come up with.”

“I know, right!” Zedaph laughs.

Impulse can’t help a laugh too. The tension and fear that’s been controlling him for the last few hours has mostly melted away now that his best friends are safe. Impulstor might still be out there but with a little luck, he won’t be able to fool the rest of the server the way he fooled Tango. He’s sure he’ll see Impulstor again, though.

But the real question is: how soon?

#hermitcraft #impulsesv #tangotek #zedaph #vaunna’s requests

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delwrites · 4 years ago

Text

Dating Tom Holland Headcannons

if you’d like me to expand on any concepts, drop me a request! I have loads of ideas oof

also, these are just my opinions and thoughts! so there will definitely be some ooc and we may disagree, but do feel free to tell me which points you disagree with! would love some feedback :)

right i’m sorry I’ve no clue why but I just see him as quite an emotional person? like him being so mature that he’s just fully intact with his feelings and doesn’t ever feel the need to hide them around you because he knows you wouldn’t judge him. like him having a lot of rough days but as soon as he sees you just instantly perking up a little bit

or literally just collapsing in your lap when you’re trying to watch something on the sofa and him just letting it all out for you to listen to as you hug his head to your chest and run your fingers through his hair

him being so scared he’s gonna lose you as you’re literally a goddess in his eyes so he always makes sure you’re happy

him always letting you choose whatever you guys watch (as most of the time he will concentrate more on you than the tv)

he would build you both a blanket fort with fairy lights and pillows and it would be the most comfy thing ever

if you choose to put on a scary film, expect him to be stuck to your side like glue, hiding his face in your neck/ chest in the scary scenes because he doesn’t care about being a mAnLy MaN

he would DEMAND that you carry him up to bed because he insists that if he leaves the cocoon of warmth that your providing, the monsters may get him

him being the bigGEST MAN-CHILD WITH YOU OH GOD

like you two literally just playing games and stuff

playing just dance and him being surprisingly good?

but then beating his behind at Mario kart

also side note but you and paddy would get along SO WELL and you’d spoil the life out of him and play games with him, and whenever you play Mario kart with him and Tom, you’d let paddy win, you’d be in 2nd place and Tom would be all the way back in 11th absjdjd

“well, at least I didn’t lose?”

and both playing animal crossing together and visiting each others islands and his is a mess whilst yours is all vibes and lovely

you and him having FIGHTS over monopoly BSIDHSHS that game RUINS friendships I swear

DON’T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON LEGO HSCGIYSEGCI

him buying you a promise ring AWWWEEE and then claiming it’s because he wants a part of him on your person at all times (so naturally, you never take it off)

him going shopping with you because he’s the biggest hype man and always going in the dressing rooms with you so you end up buying loads of outfits because he assures you that you look incredible in all of them

him carrying majority of your bags and holding open all of the doors for you (which would admittedly be a bit of a struggle with the amount of bags he ends up carrying for you VUGJYBEK)

the pap pictures this would provide!!!

also you going on dog walks with him and Tessa and him always insisting you take his coat if you ever forget yours

always visiting him on set whenever you can

whenever he has free days spending them not doing anything just cuddling into your side

him trying to teach you basketball but you always being clumsy and dropping the ball

if you ever trip best believe he wouLD NOT LAUGH ITS LIKE YOU’VE DIED

RDJ literally adopts you because we all have daddy issues and we all need that in our lives

then tom and his dynamic becoming so much more like Tony and Peters dynamic HDSBDYAB

tom asking rdj for permission before doing practically anything with you

“um, sir, could I borrow your daughter? for like, the rest of our lives?” FUHIFUEHIUFH

rdj being so protective of you oh lord

and you always going to him for advice because he’s a wise soul who can always help you, especially with relationship advice

tom getting low-key jealous pretty often, like although he has full trust in you, he (as previously mentioned) views you as a goddess who is just the definition of beauty and love and believes that you could have any man in the room (which you can queen go off) and constantly being nervous that something will happen

him being really good at not showing it though

death stares from across the room and then giving you the sweetest smile if you look (like seriously, too sweet, suspiciously sweet)

I feel like when you both get alone his demeanour just instantly changes and he goes really cold and distant all of a sudden, it’s almost as if he deflates, the drive home being so tense and him going directly to his room when you get home, but later on he gets sick of ignoring you and goes to you to talk about it properly and makes it up to you

your confidence sky-rocketing when getting with him because he gives the most obscure and yet heartfelt compliments at any chance he gets, so you know they've come from heart with how random they are

“yes darling work that top!”

“love, I don’t think I’ve ever told you this, but you ears are really pretty?”

right I know this is literally everywhere but lets be real here, he ADORES you in his hoodies. sharing clothes is so intimate to him, and each time he sees you walking about so casually in his clothes, he falls that little bit more in love with you (no matter how much he thinks that that isn’t possible)

you accidentally walking in on his lives and either saying the most chaotic or the most lovely things, and the chat absolutely living for it

“Love, are you busy? I was just thinking about taking Tessa on a walk, to that park she loves?”

or,,, “THOMAS STANLEY HOLLAND! IF I HAVE TO TELL YOU ONE MORE TIME TO TAKE YOUR DIRTY PLATES TO THE KITCHEN, I WILL SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUST! I AM NOT YOUR MOTHER, NOR YOUR CARER, SO DON’T TREAT ME AS SUCH!”

the chat blowing up being little shit stirrers like ‘oooohhhh she called him by his full name he’s in troubleeee’

Tom just pointing at his phone timidly being like “darling.. I’m live right now..”

“I DONT CARE! SORT YOURSELF OUT, YOU CAVEMAN”

him getting so embarrassed BDKDNDJD

also I’m sorry right but bathing together after a long and difficult week, or after not seeing each other due to contradicting schedules and what not, not in a sexy times way or anything but just being so intimate and comfortable around each other

and obviously this little pamper night would call for doing face masks together and painting each other’s nails

him finding it so fun to paint your nails (even though they end up really messy BDJDNDJD)

he is a magnificent chef and no one may tell me otherwise

having the arrangement of him always cooking dinner and you always washing up the dishes

but after he sees you dancing around the sink, ending up joining you (after watching you for a minute of two with heart eyes, of course)

even though he is an incredible cook, being such a bad baker. like, for one of your anniversaries, he tries to bake you a cake, but it ends up literally bubbling in the oven and spilling over the sides and never cooking all the way through and it just being a mess

you trying it out of pity and ending up getting ill, so he stays in with you to take care of you because even though both of you fail to admit it aloud, it was him who made you poorly

you decide to do all the baking at that point

every time you do decide to bake anything, always saving him the biggest and best piece

and don't even get me started on how well you’d get along with his family

like the first time he introduced you to them they were all so so so welcoming and loving and literally just took you in as their own (not as much as rob did though rdj is number one)

again, always playing with paddy

teaching paddy how to bake AWWW and always getting him the best presents

you, harry and sam literally just embarrassing tom with stories

you and harry deciding to prank tom together because tom pranked you once ages ago but after your reaction, decided never again, so of course you have to get him back

Tessa loving you so much, and tom always being able to tell when she misses you (mainly because he can relate)

having an argument that he didn't think was a big deal and where he thought you were overreacting but then hearing you call him Thomas and it setting in that it is a big deal to you and fixing it

again, please do send me an ask or pm me if you'd like me to expand on any of these! im just overflowing with ideas for this incredible man, so do ask :)

#tom holland x reader #tom #tom holland #marvel #marvel x y/n #tom holland x y/n #tom holland x you #tom holland imagine #marvel x reader #marvel imagine

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themadlostgirl · 4 years ago

Text

When It’s Cold (3)

*It’s the mutual pining for me*

~~~

A few weeks had passed of Felix and I living together and trying to find our way back to Neverland. So far all our ideas and plans lead to nothing and I was starting to get disheartened. It felt like we were never going to get back to Neverland at this rate.

Life in the mansion was pretty nice though. We were a little worried during the first week, paranoid that someone was going to return and throw us out into the cold but no one even came near the house. I was starting to wonder if anyone besides us even knew it was here.

Over the course of our stay I learned how to do laundry and bought a bike so I could get to and from town quicker. Felix and I had discussed stealing a car but seeing as how neither of us knew how to drive and stealing a car would put us under investigation we didn’t. Felix on the other hand turned out to be quite adept at cooking. He found a recipe book in one of the drawers of the kitchen and seemed to enjoy figuring out how to make certain dishes. Aside from a few burned casseroles and a very unfortunate miscommunication involving spaghetti he was doing really well. Almost every evening he had some new dish ready for dinner. I started baking again so we always had warm brownies or chocolate chip cookies in the house.

Life was good. When we weren’t looking into ways back to Neverland we were lounging around the house. We found a record player in one of the rooms and played it when it was too quiet. A few times I had caught Felix dancing around the kitchen while cooking dinner at which point he immediately stopped and pretended he wasn’t. It made him a whole lot less intimidating seeing that he was secretly a bit of a dork underneath the hard exterior.

I think that was the best part of being stuck here together. We were learning more about each other. Felix was really closed off from conversations at first but after a few days his tongue loosened up. I learned that he got the scar on his face as a result of an incident before he came to Neverland though he couldn’t remember what exactly. He preferred sweet over salty and loved chocolate covered pretzels. On Neverland he used to collect sand dollars until the other boys found his collection and smashed them all. It was nice learning these little things about him. It made me feel like we were closer.

When the idle days became too much to bear we turned to sparring to keep the boredom away. We turned the ballroom into a sparring arena so we wouldn’t lose our edge. So far we’ve only broken one vase!

One such day we were in the ballroom again fighting and I had finally got a leg up on Felix and pinned him to the ground. “Gotcha!” We were both breathing hard and I was sat right on top of him with my arms pinning his wrists against the floor. I froze as the position we were in rocketed into my mind. Felix took the moment of hesitation to break free from my hold and rolled us over so I was pinned under him. I could have argued that this position was even worse.

I swear I tried not to stare at his lips. I really did but one quick flicker down his face and I couldn’t stop looking no matter how many times I forced my eyes to look back up at his eyes.

He let me go when he saw I had completely checked out of the fight and left, leaving me reeling on the floor as to what just happened.

For as friendly as things between Felix and I got there was a problem running parallel to it. I had hoped that the last of my dirty thoughts and weird feelings for Felix would have gone away after that first day but it seemed to be having the opposite effect. The closer Felix and I got as friends the more I was pining after him and it was torture!

At some point I stopped trying to deny my body the release it craved when my mind created lewd fantasies of Felix. There was nothing wrong if it was all in my head. No one would have to know and our relationship as roommates, partners, and friends would be untarnished.

I had everything under control. That is until the night the electric went out.

There had been a huge snow storm and it knocked out power to the whole town. Huddled under a bunch of blankets and thick warm layers of clothes helped keep out any chill but it didn’t keep me warm enough. I had left the warmth of my room to start a fire in the fireplace and noticed that it was already lit. Felix was sitting in front of it with a blanket wrapped around him.

“Cold got to you too?” I asked as I sat down next to him.

“Didn’t realize how much I hated being cold until the heat turned off.” He sighed.

We sat in companionable silence for a while, listening to the fire crackle.

“Felix,” I finally said, “Do you think we’re ever gonna find a way out of here and back to Neverland? It’s been over a month and we haven’t made any headway.”

“I know.” Felix turned to look at me, “It gets a little harder everyday to keep up the flimsy hope that we’ll get back home.”

“I’m sorry I made come here.” I told him, “You would be back on Neverland without a worry in the world if I hadn’t asked you to come with me.”

“My decisions are my own. No use blaming yourself for them.” Felix ruffled my hair, the only form of affection he willingly showed.

“So why then?” I asked, “Why did you come to Storybrooke with me?”

“Why did you ask me to come?” He countered.

I took a deep breath. This same old impasse. He wouldn’t answer me unless I answered him first.

“I wanted to have someone I knew I could rely on.” I answered, “The boys that left on the ship with the adults couldn’t be relied on. They wanted families and lives away from Neverland. They wouldn’t help me get revenge for what those bastards did to Pan. But you were always loyal and I knew that you would help me if it meant avenging him.”

“You could have asked any of the other boys that chose to stay. They were also loyal. Why not ask one of them? Or was it that you had and I turned out to be the only one who said yes?” Felix said, drawing the blanket in closer around him.

“I didn’t ask anyone else. I asked you because I knew you were the only one I could trust. The only one I wanted to come with me.”

This caught Felix’s attention. He opened and closed his mouth as if searching for something to say but came up short.

“So now you have to answer my question.” I turned towards him fully, “Why did you come with me?”

His mouth snapped shut and he looked away from me. I feared he may leave without giving me an answer but he stayed seated. An internal war dueling inside his mind as he mulled over what to tell me.

Finally he exhaled and searched my eyes. There was something softer about the way he gazed at me that had me holding my breath. When he spoke it was barely a whisper and had me leaning closer to hear.

“I came with you because...because I…” He swallowed, “I came with you because I didn’t want to be on Neverland without you. We never hung out but I was never ignorant of you. You brought so much life to those around you and I...”

“Felix,” I exhaled. I reached to touch him but he pulled away just as I did. He started to stand up but I grabbed the blanket around him halting his actions.

Felix stared down at me, eyes wide and panicked. He looked like a rabbit caught in a trap.

“Please don’t go!” I blurted out. “You don’t have to run from me.”

“What makes you think I’m running?” He asked, his voice low.

“What else would you call this?” I stood up as well. “It’s just us here, Felix. No one else can hear or see what we do. You don’t need to act tough and stoic for the sake of your reputation. I’ve already seen you dance around the kitchen while cooking soup. I think the masks can come off now.”

“I’m not wearing a mask, little girl.” He spat.

“Keep telling yourself that.” I turned to leave. Why had I said anything? I completely ruined any and all progress we had been making up to this point. If I thought he might have been distant before he was sure to keep away from me now. Stupid feelings and hormones making me say things I shouldn’t be saying!

“Wait!” Felix caught me at the staircase. I wasn’t in the mood to deal with this anymore and it must have been evident in my eyes as he turned me around to look at him. “Just wait a moment.”

“Felix, I’m tired in more ways than one. Just let me go.” I tried to shrug his arms off me.

“Please,” The word bled from his lips. I don’t think I’ve ever heard Felix say please in my life. “Please just give me a moment.”

“A moment for what?”

“To think.”

“Think of what?” I demanded. “Whatever it is you want to say just say it.”

“I--I--” He stammered. “Damn it,” he hissed before slamming his lips to mine.

The sheer force of the kiss nearly knocked me backwards. The ferocity of which he kissed me was hungry and passionate. Like he was drowning and looking for air. The blanket around me dropped to the floor as I clung onto him to keep balanced. My lips moved against his with similar excitement. My heart was hammering so loud in my chest it was all I could hear.

When the need for air became too much we pulled back. Felix rested his head against mine. Eyes screwed shut. I was still trying to wrap my mind around what had just happened when he cursed under his breath and shot past me on the stairs. The sound of a door slamming shut broke me out of my haze.

Felix kissed me.

Not a quick kiss either.

Felix kissed me like I had been dreaming about for the past several weeks. I tentatively touched my lips, savoring the memory of the way his mouth felt against mine. I quickly doused the fire in the living room and rushed up the stairs. I hovered outside of Felix’s door trying to find the courage to knock.

“I know you’re out there,” Felix’s muffled voice came from within startling me. “I suggest you save whatever you have to say and take it with you back to your own room.”

“Felix,” I sighed, “I think we need to talk about what happened on the stairs.”

“Forget about it.” He snapped, “I don’t know what I was thinking.”

“I think you do. I think you know exactly what you were doing and that scares you more than if you were just reacting out of hormones.” I snapped back. “So how about you stop running and hiding from me and give me a straight answer for once!”

“I said to go away!”

“Fine!” I shouted, banging my fist against the door, “But you should know that I didn’t mind it at all you insufferable ass! I actually quite enjoyed it but, of course, you don’t care about that. Goodnight Felix.”

I stormed off back to my room and slammed the door shut behind me. I rolled into bed but sleep did not come easily. My feelings before were only more confused now after Felix had kissed me. How could he just kiss me after saying something unexpectedly sweet and then abandon me without a single word of explanation?

How is it even possible to like someone you hate so much?

~~~

Felix is a fucking idiot.

That’s it. That’s all it was. He was an idiot and he had proven that more than well enough tonight when he kissed you. Oh god above he actually broke and kissed you. He told you why he had been so willing to follow you away from Neverland and then he kissed you.

In the moment he couldn’t get the words he knew he owed you out. They were there scrambled in his brain but unable to get past his tongue. So he put his mouth to a better use.

He nearly moaned when he got a taste of you. Your breath was minty. Your lips so soft against his. He hadn’t meant to get so lost in it. But he finally had you in his arms and he didn’t want to let the sensation go.

Then you were kissing him back. Your hands tangled in his hair pulling him closer. Urging him on as he pressed your bodies together. He could have gone on forever kissing you if reality and common sense hadn’t come back to him in the moment you both were catching your breath.

He was supposed to be finding a way back to Neverland, not making out with you! But it felt so good to kiss you. You had been so perfect and warm in his arms. Thoughts of picking you up carrying you back to his room had entered his mind but were just as quickly dashed away. He couldn’t afford to be distracted. Not even by you.

You came pounding on his door yelling at him about his rude treatment towards you. Screaming about how you enjoyed the kiss as well. That almost had him running to unlock the door but the sound of your door slamming down the hall left him sat on the floor in frustration. How could he fix this? Was there anyway that he could? Would you even want anything to do with him after tonight?

Your words came back to him in that moment of contemplation. “It’s just us here, Felix. No one else can hear or see what we do.”

You were right. Of course you were right. No one else’s opinions mattered. There was no reputation to protect or people to disappoint here. He was not here for anyone to gossip about around a bonfire. It was just the two of you in this big mansion alone. There was no need to be embarrassed.

If only he had come to that realization before he shut you out for good.

There was one thing he could do to make this right. It could also backfire on him horribly but he’d rather try and fail then lose you forever because of one careless night. He would need electricity to do it but hopefully it would be back on in the morning. Restless but determined Felix crawled into bed. Plans of how to fix this mess so he could have your soft lips on his again dancing in his head.

---

(Previous) (Next)

#felix imagine #felix x reader #ouat felix #ouat #neverland #peter pan ouat #roommate au

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jungnoir · 4 years ago

Text

destiny | 09;

⇢ summary: you’re just about ready to give up on life altogether; your love life is in ruins, you’ve lost your job, and your family couldn’t care less about you… and then you meet your blushing guardian angel, and maybe life isn’t so bad after all.

⇢ relationship: jeon jungkook/reader, min yoongi/reader.

⇢ genre: supernatural, angel!au, demon!au, romance, thriller.

⇢ words: 6.5k words.

⇢ warnings: mentions of depression, violence, vomiting. slightly nsfw toward the end.

previously | next

a/n: happy new year! I know it’s been quite a while (literally an entire year since I’ve updated) but I’ve had this chapter pretty much ready in my drafts and just hadn’t gotten around to finishing because. everything. regardless, I hope this sort of makes up for it. love you all! hope you’re doing well. also WOW I swear a lot in this one.

His hand on your neck is meant to silence any screams that might slip out. He applies the perfect pressure to avoid crushing anything vital (and just by the feel alone, you know he’s got quite an amount of strength to pull that off) while simultaneously stealing all your air and forcing you to cower in fear. You don’t have to be a rocket scientist to know this guy isn’t someone to be fucked with, and all you can think about is the fact that Jungkook is right outside and has no fucking clue what’s going on. The very thought fills you with dread.

“Then again, you’ve got someone helping you.” What once was just a particular, calculated press against your skin becomes a deliberate act of violence as he begins to choke you harshly. You know the pain of his grip might last for weeks, and that’s only if you don’t die in the next minute. “Just makes me wonder what’s so special about you.”

“Nothing!” You rasp out, clawing at his hand now in some weak attempt at breaking away. If you could make enough noise, enough commotion, surely someone-

-but the stranger has already stopped you quick. You aim to throw the door open or something but his free hand quickly apprehends you until you’re just a squirming mess on the verge of passing out. Even your legs are pressed firmly to the wall by his own body, holding you fast so that you can’t help letting a few tears fall. There was no doubt in your panicked mind that this was Seokjin, the angel who’d been trailing you from the shadows for what felt like centuries. His grand act of approaching you, something you’d dreamed up to be a major climactic brawl in a battlefield made for a spectacle, turns out to be so simple. Perhaps that’s what you got for thinking biblically. Why go through all the trouble when he could just squash the problem the minute a chance presented itself?

Now, all you can think is “I can’t die like this”. A sobering thought of pure contempt. Drowning in the river was preferable to this.

You muster what breath you can, eyes blazing, “How does it feel… being God’s lap dog?”

Seokjin is, funnily enough, stunned for a moment. All bravado slips through a teeny crack in his demeanor when you say that, and even though it’s a low blow, it’s also enough for you to thrust a semi-powerful kick to the dressing room door to make the entire thing shudder like an earthquake. That sound, coupled with your comment, makes Seokjin release you in a panic. You hear some gasps from outside, a few people inquiring if you’re alright. An employee sounds most worried amongst the voices. You’re just shy of swinging the door open and forcing Seokjin to be revealed or to disappear all at once, but then he’s grabbed the back of your collar as you scream in frustrated fury. Seconds later, you’re no longer in the dressing room anymore.

Instead, you fall flat on a rough, sandy surface. You’re overwhelmed with nausea, pain, and fear, so your whole body is struggling to pick up on the most important things outside of that, but you do realize quite fleetingly that it’s sweltering. It takes you a few seconds as you curl up on the ground to peek behind your hands that shield your face and discover that it’s blindingly bright where you are, almost like a…

For fuck’s sake. “Of all the places…” You whine with a sore throat, coughing right after from the strain.

Seokjin stands above you and uses his foot to kick you onto your back so that you’re staring up at him and the baby blue sky. His hair color plays against it in an unfittingly gentle contrast, “I thought we might need somewhere safer to discuss things. Oh, and speaking of discussion,” he waves a hand near you and you instinctively flinch back before you feel the pain in your throat subside. You wait a few seconds, but it seems whatever he’d just done had no effect on the rising bile in your throat, so you assume that’s something you’ll have to deal with on your own. What an ass. “Feel better?”

“Fuck you! Maybe if you hadn’t choked me out in the first place-”

“You’d have listened?”

“Maybe if you hadn’t hunted us down to kill us, we would have!”

Seokjin frowns, “I didn’t bring you here to talk about you and that boy, I brought you here to talk about you. I am only concerned with you.”

Whatever that entailed did not sound good in the slightest.

You scramble to your feet and immediately regret the movement as it makes you sick again. The more than 100 degree weather does nothing to fix that either, the sun beating down on you and bouncing off the dusty white sands directly into your eyes. You’re feeling something nasty rising up from your stomach, ready to projectile…

Just as the scene changes, you paint a Victorian rug with streaks of your vomit.

Seokjin immediately groans out loud, placing a rough hand at the back of your neck like one would grab the scruff of a kitten. You’re far too weak to protest, rubbing at your mouth with the back of your hand, so you let him toss you into a chair. The jerkiness of the action should have sent another eruption out of you, but you recognize the relief that has overwhelmed you from the touch of his hand. Had he fixed that too?

“Never the matter,” the angel growls, waving his hand and making the mess evaporate from the very fibers of the rug, “you’re all very fragile. I should have prepared you first.”

“How can you do all that…?” You couldn’t recall Jungkook or Jimin showing off any power like that, and whether it was because of Seokjin’s status or their modesty (and adherence to rules), you were unsure. Most likely both.

Instead of answering right away, Seokjin reaches forward a moving cart and you finally notice there’s a glass pitcher of water (hopefully) next to an array of empty glasses. You take the time he spends pouring some water for you to examine your surroundings.

It looks like a secret room in an old English manor house. The walls are painted a deep charcoal and with the absence of natural light, you could mistake it for the void. The only light that does exist is a strangely dim white light coming from the ceiling. What looks like a rather ornate shell of a skylight (sans the window to actually reveal, well, a sky), seems to hide said white light somewhere in it. It’s such a vague glow that you can’t pinpoint if it’s coming from a lightbulb or magic.

The rest of the room is just as ornate as the “skylight”, filled with deep oak bookshelves, golden artifacts, and shining decorations that already look like they cost more than your house. It doesn’t really matter the longer you think about it. All of it has to be an illusion… right?

A glass is placed into your hand and you break out of your thoughts to make eye contact with Seokjin. He hovers over you with narrowed eyes and when you look back at your surroundings again, you notice all the little decorations have disappeared. Why had he- “We can negotiate those bits of the deal later if you so wish.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” You ask, hesitant to drink the water despite how much the heat of the desert had made you crave it.

“Like I said before, I brought you here to discuss you. I’ve been watching you and lover boy for a while and it has become clear to me that you’ve been pulled along for quite the ride. I’m sure it’s all very daunting.”

“It wouldn’t have been so bad if you hadn’t shown up.”

“How much do you know about our Lord and Savior?”

It was tricky to say the least. You’d grown up on tales of him, an over-powered being of immense stature. No one could come close to him, not even the devil. However, you’d learned bits and pieces from Jungkook, Yoongi, and the others to the point where your ideas of the figure had become skewed. There was no linear understanding of him. You honestly had no idea, “Probably not enough.”

Seokjin huffs, taking a seat from across from you in a chair similar to yours. Crossing a leg over the other, the angel stares you down, “Do you know why I’m after you both?”

“You want to kill Jungkook. Because he committed your sin.”

“Jungkook is my main target, yes, but it wasn’t my sin. My sin was sullying myself with a demon. Jungkook’s sin was sullying you.”

You frown, “He did no such thing! You had a fucking child! Jungkook saved my life!”

“You mean to say he ruined it. You were supposed to be dead a long time ago.”

You’d known that much, Jungkook had told you already. Even if he hadn’t, that had always been the plan. “It was… it was my choice and I wanted it then, I admit it. But I was hurt. I was overwhelmed. I wanted it because I was scared there would be no reason to keep going.”

The angel angles a brow upwards, “And the fallen was that for you? A reason to keep going?”

“It was- it was a lot of things. I was reminded that I existed, and that there are people who can love me the right way,” frustrated at the situation, you glare at him, “what the fuck? Is this some fucking therapy session?”

He has the gall to smile, “God knows you need one. I’d like to be the one to get inside that mind of yours.”

Shit. What if you’d given him just the right information to use against you?

You snap your lips shut and sink back into your chair, bubbling with more dread. He notices your sudden resolve and appears to want to ease your worries, “I’m not doing this to break you. Unlike God, I find you, as a person, quite redeemable. A gentle, pained soul who fell victim to the perversion of her guardian angel. It’s all very sad.”

So God did think you were a lost cause. Jimin had been right after all. However, you don’t want to keep talking when you’re so close to getting the information you’ve been waiting for. It seems even Seokjin isn’t fazed by your silence, continuing on without missing a beat. “You see, usually these angel and human matters can be chalked up to the angel getting too big for their britches. They think they can change things like fate: God’s very flawless plan from the beginning. They are simply… glitches in the matrix, you could say? That’s where I come in. I make sure these issues are handled and that everything goes back to normal. You see, God loves his humans. Truly. He has a bit of a temper, but it’s justified, you know? He loves you all so very much that seeing you stray from a holy and righteous path is heartbreaking for him. He can only excuse so much.

“So he doesn’t. But… sometimes I help him. I change his mind. Even Jesus had to convince God not to blame his executioners. The big guy gets real impassioned about those he loves. It’s all part of the territory of being in heaven’s sovereignty,” at this, Seokjin shrugs, “you were an unfortunate casualty of it. However, I brought you here because I think that you could be saved. You’re simply confused. I’m sure I could convince God to rethink... his punishment for you.”

Your eyes widen, nearly dropping your glass, “He’d do that?”

The angel nods, pleased, “Of course! After all, he just wants you to repent. If you show that you will, well, I could put in a good word for you. He and I are very close.”

“But only for me.”

Seokjin’s smile dims some. He was so sure he’d had you on the hook just then, “Well… yes. There isn't much I can say about angels. Humans are born sinful, but angels are born knowing better. If they succumb to sin, I cannot do anything about that. But… if you feel that you’d be leaving Jungkook behind, and if that would cause you to feel guilty, I can assure you that that would be taken care of. Your memory of him would be wiped clean and you’d receive another guardian angel in an instant. You’d be granted everything you ever wanted. You’d be able to live out a new path of life contrary to the one your fallen so selfishly carved out for you.”

At this, you begin to frown deeper than you ever have. It’s not out of confusion but deep, deep understanding. Seokjin’s deal was asking you to sell Jungkook out and in return… he’d make you happy. You’d forget all about what had happened and carry on a new person, virtually safe. You could only assume that meant forgetting Yoongi too. Everything you’d accomplished so far would be rearranged until the you that you’d become would be so unfathomable you wouldn’t ever consider it.

What scares you the most is that you actually consider it.

This all could end right now and you’d get out alive, maybe all the ordinary people you knew would get out alive too. You’d be completely removed from the situation. You’d just have to forget Jungkook.

“You asked me how much I know about God,” you start, thumbs twiddling, and Seokjin perks up, “the stories humans told of him always kind of scared me. He’s so powerful… he knew everything before it was even created. Nothing can get past him. And yet, he let humans have free will and the right to choose what their path in life would be. That part always boggled my mind. God’s supposed to love us unconditionally, but if we don’t return the favor, we suffer eternally. It seemed like a pretty big plothole in the otherwise ‘flawless plan’ you claim he made.”

“Yes, well, it’s not God’s fault that Lucifer’s so conniving.”

“But it is. Isn’t it? God created him. Lucifer is the one who brought sin upon the world but God is the one that created him. If he knows everything, why make him in the first place? It’s a fallacy,” Seokjin’s eye twitches just a bit as you lean forward, “that God knows everything. Isn’t it? He wouldn’t be so stupid. He had no fucking clue what he’d made when he made Lucifer.”

“I’d watch your tone. God hears all.” The angel’s ominous reply is all that you need to hear. He doesn’t tell you that anything else you’ve said is false or not. Of course not. You know as well as he does that you’re spot on.

You’re so stunted by the arrogance of it all that you have to laugh, “Allegedly.”

In that same moment, the white light above begins to flicker. A distant rumbling sounds from somewhere and that fear you’d felt earlier comes back with a vengeance. Seokjin looks annoyed, if anything, “I only have so much time to sit here with you to chat.” He stands up and walks over to you, seizing you by the arm, “So I’m telling you now that you still have a chance. No one else has to die. Do me a solid and make that a reality.”

Did he really not want to kill you? He’d had so many chances to. Even now, he could just… what did you have that made him hesitate? “You think I believe that?”

The ground rumbles underneath you and then you fall through, Seokjin’s grip slipping off your arm… or maybe being pried off.

Where you land next isn’t as disorienting as the last few times, but it doesn’t feel any better to be ripped away again without so much as a warning. For a moment before you land, you halt, almost floating. Then your feet make contact with stone and then your knees follow under the sudden press of gravity. A quick look around tells you that Seokjin is nowhere to be seen… and that where you are looks vaguely familiar.

The stone continues up the walls to the ceiling, creating a naturally cold room that expands no more than the size of a restroom (no toilets in sight, however). The furthest edge of the room from you is completely dark, while the other is helped by a fire stretching from one long, narrow wall to the other. There is no wood crackling beneath it though, nor is there an actual controlled area for it to burn. Flames simply lick up the bottom of the wall as if commanded by magic. While the rest of your body feels chilly, the warmth of the fire keeps your head warm like a fever.

You lay crumpled up on your knees and hands, staring into the flames with the most bemused expression, wondering what to do now. You’re definitely not intent on travelling to the other side of the room in fear of being met with something sinister you can’t see, but the fire only illuminates so much of the place and there doesn’t seem to be a door in sight. If Seokjin wasn’t here, you doubted this was a place he wanted to be.

Maybe he was torturing you? Intending to keep you in a dark, scary room in order to break your resolve? You didn’t know the extent of power he was allowed to wield but this whole transportation thing was starting to get really annoying. You chance a meek, “Hello?”

Your voice doesn’t echo like you expect it to. It sounds like it’s right up against your face, like you’d spoken into a pillow, the sound eaten as soon as it came from your mouth. Where the hell were you?

“...not exact, okay?!”

You pick up on a voice to your right and turn over with such speed that you land on your ass. Some stones move on the narrow wall, and then the room is illuminated from an entirely different source of light. It takes you a few moments to gather your bearings as your eyes attempt to adjust. Voices are frantic and coming closer, you can hear that much. You pick up on one instantly, “Jungkook.”

Your voice is weak with relief just as he comes into view. He looks an absolute mess as he throws himself at your feet and wraps you up into a bone-crushing hug. The strength of his hug doesn’t even bother you as you cling back with just as much force, grateful tears beginning to gush out of your eyes. You didn’t realize until then just how terrified you’d been, really. It was always there underneath the surface, but something about Jungkook’s sudden presence makes the reality of it all hit much harder. He smells like your shampoo still.

After a couple of minutes in his embrace, you pull away to examine his face, “Are you okay?”

He laughs and the way his tears have clogged up his throat make it sound more like he’s choking, “Who cares about me? Are you?”

You smile, tucking some of his hair behind his ear, “Better. With you here. Where are we?”

“Limbo, hell’s limbo.”

You’re not sure what to say in response to that. After what you’d been through in the last… however long it’d been, that seems the most plausible to you. “Is that like purgatory?”

“No,” another voice speaks from above you and only then do you realize that Yoongi is here too. He looms over the both of you but his gaze is fixed heavy on your face, “purgatory is where the dead go on their way to heaven. This is where the living come on their way to hell. Was a hell of a ride trying to get your ass down here.”

“Yoongi…” You peel back from Jungkook and stand up, a little wobbly as you lean against the wall, “...thank you. How did you do it? The places Seokjin took me… I felt like we were in a dream.”

His upper lip ticks up in a snarl, “It was. The place where you were is a void, heaven’s version of limbo. It’s where angels bargain with humans on the edge of death to repent. It’s an open playing field for angels to present themselves to their humans without them having to be dead or breaking a rule… not like the latter really applies to Seokjin, though. It’s only as strong as your will to be there,” with that, Yoongi reaches toward you and brushes what feels like sand off your cheek, or perhaps he just meant to touch you to make sure you were really here with the way it lingered, “and that’s the only reason I could pull you out.”

It was a lot to digest. You still couldn’t totally understand how he’d pulled you from heaven’s limbo if he was a demon, but that was beside the point. Right now, you just wanted to get out of this creepy box of a room for good. And it seemed you would be getting your wish.

Another figure became clear to you through the doorway, though this figure looked much more intimidating than the two by your side. Dressed immaculately with a sly smile that felt strikingly familiar, a man makes his way into the room, pressing a hand to his chest and bowing his head to you, “He had my help too, of course. A pleasure to meet you (Name), I’ve heard very little about you.” The man holds out a hand to you and you can feel both Jungkook and Yoongi stiffen on either side of you, but neither makes a move to stop him. This had to be another demon, no doubt.

You take his hand and shake it firmly despite your nerves, “T-Thank you for your help as well. May I ask who you are?”

The man grins wider, “You can call me Lucifer. Are you hungry?”

An entire array of human food is set out before you but you don’t have much of a stomach to touch any of it, though Jungkook seems right at home as he fills up his own plate. You can only guess he’s enjoying the hell out of having so much food at his fingertips without having to pay for it.

You can hear his delighted sound effects from the left of you as you both sit on one side of a long table. Lucifer sits at the head of the table to the right of you, also refraining from really eating anything. Yoongi sits right across from you on the other side with an annoyed expression on his face, fingers tapping the heavy oak table top in a rhythm you can’t decipher. It couldn’t be any more awkward.

“No appetite?” Lucifer asks, pointing to the food. There’s meat and vegetables and cheeses that you know and don’t know but none of it seems particularly appetizing to you at the moment.

You shake your head, “No. Actually, I have a few questions I’d like to ask you.”

“Ah, bet you’re bursting.” He chuckles and takes a swig of something you think might be wine. “Go ahead. I’ll try to recap the last couple of days as well as I can.”

“Days?!” You don’t mean to yell, you really don’t (especially not at the king of hell, but-), “It’s been days?”

Jungkook stops chewing to give you a concerned look, “Of course… how long was it for you?”

“Barely… half an hour, maybe more? But not days.”

“Yes, well,” Lucifer sighs, tucking his hands together in front of himself, “time works much differently in heaven and hell than it does here. Especially for those who end up in heavenly limbo. It’s essentially cut off from the rest of the universe which makes it that much harder to track those who end up there. Seokjin was smart in bringing you there than somewhere else on earth.”

Your head is throbbing at this point. If days had gone by, you could only imagine how much had changed since you’d been gone… “So… what has happened since then?”

“Apparently quite a bit, seeing as I was a last resort.” Lucifer’s tone almost sounds irritated. Like a petulant child, he glares over at his son with an unspoken tension that you would like to delve into much, much later when the important things have been moved out of the way. “These boys have been pretty busy trying to get you back. But we are all eager to know what happened while you were with Seokjin.”

Jungkook places a gentle hand on top of your knee under the table. For whatever reason, you note that his grip feels stronger than you’d grown used to. You’d thought the hug was just because he missed you so much, but even this simple touch was- “He… he found me in the dressing room, cornered me there and told me he’d been trying to get me and Jungkook alone. Somewhere he could really do some damage.” You recite all that you readily remembered, some details slipping as you focus on Jungkook’s touch. Yoongi’s eyes never stop boring into you. “He said a lot. He… he said he wanted to give me a second chance.”

Lucifer raises a brow at you, “At…?”

“Life. He said that if I… if I ratted out Jungkook, he’d work things out with God to set my life back on track. Memories wiped, a new guardian angel, the works.” You can feel Jungkook stiffen next to you.

“And did you take him up on it?” Lucifer inquires.

“No! No, I would… I would never. But he was so insistent… It sounded like he really wanted me to say yes. I don’t think he was planning to betray me if I took him up on it either.”

Lucifer heaves a heavy sigh. Folding his hands underneath his chin, the king of hell spares a glance at Jungkook, “He’s got a thing for innocents: those he believes did no actual harm in a situation. He’s always been soft that way. He has more of an affinity for humans than I ever did, but I have more reason to loathe humans than he does, so I guess it’s understandable.”

“He did… mention that none of this was my fault.”

“Of course! You were only following the path life laid out for you. It was the fallen angel you have beside you that decided to shake things up, and aren’t you lucky he did? It doesn’t surprise me one bit that you’re still alive. You’ve done nothing but suffer the consequences, it seems, against your own will.”

“But what about the demon he fell for? Or his child? Weren’t they killed so he could keep his spot in heaven?”

Lucifer leans forward, “I’m assuming your friends haven’t made it known to you yet, but they aren’t dead. They are both very much alive. In fact, the child in question was one of the people that helped in tracking you down. The mother… she is here, in hell, meant to stay imprisoned for all eternity. Or at least until the rapture,” with that, Lucifer drinks again, maintaining eye contact with your shocked stare, “but it was best that no one knew of their whereabouts. Only a handful of people even know that Inhui still exists. It’s become something of a legend amongst the demons and angels, shrouded in confusion. None of the angels would care for the mother, but the child would start an earthly war if they knew one still walked the earth. As far as they’re concerned, the child probably died from the natural complications of being an abomination.”

You frown, “How is that possible? An angel for every human on earth… that’s billions of angels and no one has even noticed the guy?”

“I was wondering about that, actually. He told us that he’d been walking the earth for a while now. Surely someone would have taken notice, right?” Jungkook speaks next, having abandoned his food entirely.

Yoongi snaps out of his bored stance, “Tae’s an anomaly. He’s forgotten everywhere he goes. His impression barely lasts long. Those people he encountered early on considered him a dream, or a hallucination, or a possession of the mind. His actual presence is… hazy. It’s easier to remember him by his name or his number, but everything else is-”

“Intangible.” His father finishes with a flourish. “No ordinary angel or demon could ever put a face to the name, only a feeling. Along with the rather excessive amount of glamours he employs when amongst the public, it is no wonder no one has sounded the alarm. Go ahead and recall his face in your mind, fallen. I’m sure you couldn’t piece it together even if you wanted to.”

Jungkook’s face screws up a little as an attempt, stricken dumb moments later when he can’t utter a thing. Your stomach churns at the thought, soiling your appetite even more.

It seemed like there was more to that story than you were being told, but you imagined that it would be quite a lot to relay to you in more than one sitting. After all, you still had no clue what you’d missed since you’d been gone, and it only hadn’t terrified you senseless because you were at least certain that the biggest threat to everyone’s lives had been right there with you the whole time.

“If you’re not planning to eat anytime soon, is there anything else you’d like to know? It’s not every day a mortal like you gets to talk to Lucifer.” With a small flourishing wave of his hand, Lucifer smiles at you, charming as ever. It was so strange. Yoongi acted nothing like his father, and yet you saw every bit of him in his expression.

You imagined Yoongi felt the need to distance himself as much as he could from his father’s intimidating image and had ended up creating his own in the process. Where Lucifer was inviting, however, Yoongi was… not for everyone. Even as he stares over the table at you, eyes hooded with what appears to be indifference rather than lasciviousness, you can’t help but see the other in him.

“I suppose not,” you murmur, “but now that I have the chance, I don’t really know what to say.”

Lucifer continues to smile, “Don’t fret! I’m sure after the doozy you’ve been in, you’ll need to rest up. You’re more than welcome to stay here until you feel it’s safe to go back topside.”

The thought of treating hell like a hotel to stay in was tickling to say the least. The minute you rise, Jungkook follows suit, nearly knocking his chair over in the process to follow you. “I’d appreciate that. Is there… perhaps a room I could cool down in? Maybe a bathroom?”

Lucifer had deposited both you and Jungkook in a rather nice room, fitted with all the things you’d find in a nice resort room overlooking somewhere like the Bahamas. The dark, brooding colors of Hell follow you even here, and what little light you are allowed in the room comes from fire or mysterious ambience. Still, it’s enough to splash your face with (what you’re definitely sure is) water in the ensuite bathroom.

Jungkook sits at the foot of the bed, watching you, “I missed you.”

Since the moment that the Lord of Hell and his son had left you to your devices, you’d become increasingly aware that something was off about your angel. You had imagined that it had been from the sheer worry he felt over you, but it was starting to feel different from that. Something not so easily explained. If only… if only you could figure it out.

You pat your skin dry and look over at him, measuring him up and down. Appearance wise, he still had the same haircut, same clothes, same shoes. It was the aura that felt different.

Slowly, you approach him from the bathroom and wish that there would be more light in the room to examine him with. In that same moment, what appeared to be a ray of warm light halos above you both, giving you exactly what you had wished for. When Jungkook looks up, he looks… radiant. “I missed you too…” You whisper, reaching out a hand to cup his jaw. At your touch, he shudders, melting into you, and those eyes then laser focus on your own. “Are you okay?”

“I am now.” He answers without hesitation, then turns to kiss your inner palm with such a sensual drag of his lips that you grow hot instantly. The surprise makes you yank your hand away and you swear you hear him whine at the missing contact.

“Y-You just look different.” You squeak, holding the aforementioned hand to your chest as if he’d burned you.

Jungkook’s bushy brows furrow. “Do I?”

When Jungkook had been an angel, he’d had a distinct glow about him that set him apart from others. It was cliche, but it made sense then. You knew that you were dealing with someone from another world. When he’d turned human, he’d felt softer, normal. He didn’t glow in any particular way lest the light hit him through the window just right. But now… that glow was back. In a way that didn’t feel familiar.

You reach your hand out again, but this time you let it wander. You push his fringe back from his forehead, then behind his ear, then down his neck to where a sweatshirt hides his collarbones. In a daze, you fall to your knees before his seated frame and push the fabric back some. You find… nothing. You don’t even know what you’re looking for. A vampire bite? What is so different?

Your hand starts to fall mindlessly as you wrack your brain, but it’s all for naught when Jungkook catches hold of it and intertwines his fingers with yours. His grip is warm and solid. But it’s still- “I thought he’d hurt you.”

You look back up into Jungkook’s eyes as he now leans over you with an intense stare. His hair curls around his cheekbones and twists away from his face at the nape, each strand fluttering as he inches closer until the longest ones are touching your face. “Not much. He healed what he did anyway.”

At that, your angel’s eyes narrow in their scan over you, “What did he do?”

You instinctively swallow. Perhaps because you remember the feeling. Perhaps because Jungkook looks like he could kill. “He… he had to get me to limbo. He had to…” You touch the skin of your throat the same moment you break eye contact, feeling the ghost of Seokjin’s fingers there. It wasn’t so long ago that it had happened after all. You could honestly still feel it.

The silence grows until it’s nearly unbearable, you eventually finding that Jungkook will say nothing while you continue to avoid his gaze. Against your better judgement, you chance a look up at him.

You don’t get very long to look. Jungkook takes both sides of your face and lunges forward like a man possessed and you are forced to follow. In your surprise, you stumble back onto your elbows and Jungkook slots himself between your legs, latching onto your lips in a searing kiss. It’s hot and fast and immature, the kiss of a person who has never kissed before and may never get the chance to kiss again. Youngho had never kissed you like this.

A gentle whimper escapes your mouth but Jungkook inhales it into his own. You feel something primal burn inside you when Jungkook growls out, crouching over you now like a predator cornering his prey, and he’s practically consuming you when you start to kiss back. Can you blame yourself? You easily fold into the feeling because it’s Jungkook and goddamn if you hadn’t wanted to kiss him badly before.

His inexperience does very little to dissuade from how good it feels too, and as you start to take over to guide him, he is all too eager to feel your reciprocated passion. The heady feeling he gives you in his sudden attack pushes all thoughts of Seokjin or the last few days out of your mind like a fast-acting asprin. All you can think of now is how tightly coiled you’d been and how Jungkook is loosening you up one press of his lips at a time.

He lays you on your back and you happily oblige, no cushioning found on the hard floor but you couldn’t care less. Jungkook is careful not to be too rough, aware of your needs as much as his own, and it’s jarringly sweet the way he cradles the back of your head to keep you from hitting it on your descent.

When he’s had enough of your lips (as if he could ever), he starts attacking your neck. He’s lapping at your skin and biting away as if he’s trying to remove all traces of Seokjin’s hands… as if he’s replacing the feeling with him and him only. “I’ll kill him,” Jungkook whispers, a foreign fury in his voice that makes your haze disappear in an instant while he continues to work at your neck, “I’ll kill him for ever touching you.”

Your hand shoots to his hair, feeling your heart beat faster from more than just the kisses, “Kook-” But any attempt at sobering up washes away when, to your surprise, he ruts against you. Youngho had never been that good at using his hips like that either. There was something definitely off with Jungkook.

As much as it pains you, you grab at his hair and yank back, ignoring (or trying to) the filthy groan that he gives in response before peeling away from your skin. You gasp for breath, absolutely winded, “What is going on?”

Jungkook pants past wet lips, “What do you mean-”

“Did Yoongi do this to you?” The sudden heated moment is over when you say that.

Jungkook’s blood has run cold. You have a very strong, haunting feeling that your mounting suspicions have proven correct. His eyes… as gentle as they always were when they looked at you, told you everything. He was not the same Jungkook you’d come to know. Something had happened to him. Something irreversible. You touch his face again and this time Jungkook does not move to embrace it. He looks like he’d rather be anywhere else in the world. “Why?”

In an attempt to escape your pitiful gaze, Jungkook’s eyes flutter shut, cutting you off from seeing him vulnerable any longer. It breaks your heart the longer he stays silent. There’s no denying it now.

A tear of his touches the palm of your hand instead of his lips this time, “How else could I protect you?” He chokes, weak, “I’m not your angel anymore. I can’t be like you. This is the only way... the only way I could stand to look you in the eyes again.”

#majwrites #jungkook scenarios #jungkook imagines #jungkook au #angel!jungkook #jeon jungkook #bts scenarios #bts imagines #bts au #yoongi scenarios #yoongi imagines #yoongi au #demon!yoongi #min yoongi #bts #jungkook angst #yoongi angst #angel bts #demon bts

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cherrysweather · 3 years ago

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Feather Necklace

Simon Blackquill x F!Reader TW: Character death, sad & angry Simon, sad Taka, bad writing 10.825 words total (Of pure trash) ^-- (I think)

It should be sad, but it really isn't; I'm sorry :( (This is the "remake" of my first work "As long as I live")

(I won't link it because it deserves to be forgotten completely)

Enjoy some Blackquill content people <3

“Ok so, are we ready for this?”

“As much as I want to say that I’m ready, I’m not” the woman laughed softly, approaching her friend that was screwing around with the controls of the program

“Weren’t you the one that was waiting for this experiment most?”

“Indeed, but if you’re the one who’s guiding it, I’m afraid that the chances of exploding with the whole laboratory are slightly increased, Aura”

“EXCUSE ME. You’re rude, don’t start behaving like that weeb of your husband” she huffed and almost threw something at her friend

“Remember that he’s also your brother” she laughed and approached the eldest of the two Blackquill siblings with her chair

“Of course, BUT, unlike you, I didn’t choose to spend all my life with him, so you’re the one who got yourself into that mess of a person” she tried to sound as cold as possible, as if to scold her

“Stop it, I’ll get cavities from all this love” she huffed, smiling to herself and looking at Aura from the corner of her eyes not to miss her reaction

“Can you- shut up and think about the experiment!” Aura hit her on the arm as strongly as she could to make her turn and hide the blush that was building on her cheeks “You should be the one guiding it! I don’t even work here anymore!”

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell him” she laughed, trying to stop Aura’s hand from hitting her, adjusting herself on the chair “Now come on, or that directo on two wheels will come to be a pain in the ass”

“You’ll think about him, it’s just your director now” Aura sighed before turning back to the screen and controls before her. She checked everything one last time before giving the ok and starting the engines of a prototype rocket, the same that was in the actual rocket that the center will send to the moon next.

“It seems that nothing has exploded”

“Yet” Aura finished her friend’s phrase, both writing what it seemed and not seemed weird, out of place or completely wrong “If it doesn’t explode by itself I’ll set it on fire” she laughed, throwing herself back against the chair, crossing her hands behind her head and enjoying the show.

“Maybe it is better that you don’t work here anymore, arsonist”

“Hey! Since I came here for the first time I always wanted to set something important on fire” she argued way too seriously

“If you want to do that... I’ll watch from the outside” the other woman gradually lowered her voice to avoid inciting her friend

“So you want to see it too!” she started laughing like a proud child, proud of the trouble she had just caused. Their arguing was interrupted by a sudden roaring sound followed by a slight tremor of the ground

“... I think the engines committed suicide on their own” the not arsonist of the two tried to remain serious, but seeing the look on Aura’s face, cheeks full of air to hold back the laughter, she too burst out laughing, dragging Aura with her. “We should warn the other downstairs, maybe something saved itself?” she slowly got up the chair, stapling the paper where she wrote what went wrong

“Actually, Ms. Blackquill junior, you should warn who has to tidy up everything but” she stopped to point at the clock behind her “You also need to go home; the center will close in two hours but your shift is already over. You should stop working this much, at least these last months before that screaming being is born" she sighed, pointing her friend's belly

“I’m fine this way, if I work until late then I come home destroyed and Simon won’t have to listen to me so much before I collapse” she smiled at her, walking out of the laboratory to find who was watching downstairs and hand them the documents that she and Aura had compiled. Outside, the sun was setting and the woods around the building were starting to look quieter like every day around this moment of the day.

“I think he’s waiting somewhere” Aura pointed outside the window the sky and only after some seconds she understood, seeing the large wings and the tiny bandana around Taka’s neck

“Probably he finished work early”

“Unlike SOMEONE” Aura threw her elbow at her friend’s arm

“He's probably preparing to lecture me about my working hours too, you don't need to put yourself in the middle of it too” she slapped Aura’s arm, looking her badly before breaking in a small smile, not being able to get mad at her. That small smile remained on her face as she followed the raptor around the sky with her eyes, almost slipping down the stairs that, to look at the hawk, she had not noticed.

“I see an idiot at 12 o'clock” Aura raised both her voice and arm when she recognized that bichrome pillar that was his brother "Want me to give those documents? He seems already pissed and I don't want to talk to him in that state" Aura whispered to her friend's ear, trying not to laugh right against it

"If you want to give them in my place, I need to sign them" she hit Aura's forehead with hers, taking a pen from a desk after raising her hand to greet Simon too, smiling at him

"Come on then, sign them" Aura clapped her hands lightly to spur her friend to hurry up

"Turn around" she waited for Aura to turn on her own, having to turn her around on her own, since she remained frozen with a confused look on the face. She used Aura's back as a surface to sign the papers, trying not to push her "Here, you can deliver the documents now" she waiter for Aura to take the documents from her hand with that smile she knew pissed her off from how innocent it looked

"I felt like an object. For the first time in my entire life" she took the documents and didn't even give a second goodbye to her friend before leaving, passing near her brother to hit him, for fun, as a greeting.

Following shortly after, the newest member of their family approached Simon, making space in his folded arm to rest her head on his chest, hugging him. "Good evening handsome, bad day at work?" she looked up at him, her chin pressed against his chest and her fingers playing with the tips of his hair falling off his shoulders He hinted a smile, looking down at her too

"Right now I'm feeling a bit better" he passed a hand over her hair before stopping it and placing his wide palm against her cheek, slowly moving his thumb against it

She closed her eyes in those brief moment in which he moved his thumb on her face "I saw Taka flying around in the woods, since when you leave him so free?"

"If it's around here, I feel enough confident to leave him free" he felt something pinch his chest when he looked at her relaxed face, but before she could question his presumably dark expression, he was already dragging her out the center, holding one of her hands in a grip you could call deadly, but it was kind enough not to hurt her, as if she was about to disappear right in front of his eyes.

"Taka bit me again, he really doesn't like me" the girl giggled softly, passing a hand where the hawk bit her, noticing the red skin

"He just needs time to adjust to your presence, hawks work this way" Simon looked up from the documents he was working on, approaching her "Don't worry, he'll understand too how gentle and caring you are" he moved a lock of her hair behind her ear before gently looking where his pet bit her

"Not that he has to, I understand that you two have been together for years and now there's an intruder in your territory" she tried to hide the demonstration of the warmth she felt on her cheeks by moving her head a lot while talking, making Simon smile

"Come with me, some cold water and a skin cream should prevent a scar or a blood crust" he took her hand in his, bringing her to the bathroom nearby "And don't worry, he will hear me"

Luckily it all changed; the bird that before liked to bit her, was now the one that always found a cozy nest on her lap and allowed her to play with his feathers. One thing she always brings with her is, actually, a necklace that Simon gifted her years ago, of which the pendant is made of some feathers that Taka had lost; the small size and the ruined look, as much as she has always looked after them, marked the age of that object that Simon, for some years now, kept asking her to eliminate, embarrassed by his past gesture but also because he wanted to see a new one around her neck.

"You worked until now, would you be interested in a break? With me?" as soon as Simon tried to sit and finish reviewing some documents, she was already there, trying to stop him from exhausting himself like every other day "With some food? I've also bought a bottle of sake last ti-"

"You can't drink alcohol" he cut her off abruptly, looking towards where she was leaning against the door of his studio

"In fact, I bought it for you" she huffed, and looked at him back, starting a staring contest "Don't make me do it the hard way" she kept looking his eyes, completely entering the studio

"Hard way? You? And what would you do exactly?" he smirked and slowly lowered his head, looking back at his documents.

She waited some seconds before shaking her head and approach him "You wanted it" she pushed his chair away from the desk, moving him slowly because of her low strength compared to his weight; she tried to open his arms but he fought back, doing his best to keep them closed before giving up to please her, watching what she had in mind. She looked at him, searching for a comfortable position and how to achieve it, standing beside his legs before sitting on his lap; sitting in a really gentle way.

"Oh- Oh heck. You're not so light anymore you know" he caught his breath again before hugging her waist with both his arms, softly smiling at her and using her shoulder as a support for his chin

"E-EXCUSE YOU" she hit him in the hardest way she could on his arm "You're telling me I'm fat?! You-"

"Can I- Can I talk?!" he laughed, taking her hands in his to stop her hits "You're the same, it's this, thing, that gives you more weight" he pointed her belly

"Oh right, that thing that appears to be your daughter" she looked at her with an offended look, following his hand with the eyes as it moved

"Our, you're the one who's baking her" he slowly passed his hand on her abdomen, searching for some movement before being surprised by her laughs

"I'm baking her? I like it!" she gently hit his jaw with her shoulder "She's a little bread loaf" she poked Simon's hand that was on her stomach before trying to cover it with her own

"An unusually calm bread loaf" he laid his head on her chest, moving his hand in small moves to better feel the almost unnoticeable pushes the tiny being inside her was giving to the belly

"Yeah, she's pretty calm these days" a chuckle escaped her lips

"Certainly not like her mother" he dodged the hit she intended for his head, resting his back flat against his chair to create stillness before breaking it, taking her in his arms and going to the living room, placing her gently on the couch, not without her complaints "You wanted a break? I hope you're happy now" he took off his coat and jacket, checking the food for Taka and placing it near his branch to allow him to eat

"I'll be happy when you eat something, as if I don't know you enough to know that you don't even watch food since this morning" she slowly got up from the couch again, heading to the kitchen "So, my dear, we have: some cooked white rice, fruit, lots of fruit, there are also some leftovers of Athena's biscuits. What do you want?" she set the table with a bit of everything, taking also the sake she promised him

"You should also eat more and stop thinking only about me when you hav-"

"Oh myy, stop lecturing me" she cut him off, stopping in time his lecture at birth "I just try to compensate for your bad habits" she handed him some rice when he sat down, smiling at him to diffuse the tension between them

"... You should learn to take care of yourself first, before thinking about other people" he ate something to keep his calm before looking up again, slowly breathing and placing down his plate

"Listen, you have been insisting on this thing for days now; care to explain what do you want to say? It's bad that I care for your health knowing that it wasn't your priority for seven years?"

"It's also been four years now since I came back or am I wrong? This care of yours for others becomes bad when you prefer to ignore your health, hoping that somehow your body will heal by itself"

"What are y-"

"And don't start treating me like an idiot, I saw the medical reports you kept preciously hidden; hidden to whom you promised to say everything long ago, I don't know if you even remember" his look on her was reproachful but he didn't have the courage, the mental strength to inflict on her the frustration that had accumulated in him in those days, the fear, the pain, the sadness he refused to show "When were you going to tell me? A stone’s throw from the grave? When you’d collapse to death and I’d have to drag you to the hospital without having any idea what was going on with you?"

She fell into total silence, her eyes refused to look anywhere but the floor, her brain was processing everything that was going on and searched for words that weren't "Sorry" "Simon, please listen" she fell silent, expecting to be interrupted by Simon, but he remained silent, watching her and waiting for her to find the right words to express herself.

That. That look of horror in Simon's eyes was what punched her right in the chest, forcing her to rest her back against the chair for some seconds to feel something supporting her to not panic completely "I- I don't know why I didn't tell you, I didn't want to bother you to-" she fought to keep inside the sobs that cut her words. She got up, searching some water to regain her composure before her chest was pressed against Simon's, her arm held by the grip of one of his hand, took right before she could go and greet the floor

"Stay still, you're trembling" he kept her near his chest, feeling her breath heave more and more every second

"I was scared..."

Without looking at her, he gently pushed her until her back rested against the wall, his arm hugged her body, his hand kept her head against his chest, his face hidden in her hair.

She placed her hands on his chest, placing her ear where his heart was, finding comfort in his heartbeat "S-Simon, I'm sorry" she kept trembling, and slowly a pool of tears collected on his shirt

"Calm down, remain there, it's warm" he could feel it too, her tears warmed her face, his chest, her fingers, her hair, but inside they were both freezing, a deathly cold that easily annihilated each word they were trying to speak.

She searched protection in his neck, breathing his scent and trying to calm down, murmuring sorry after sorry, feeling the guilt hit her head.

From how hard he clenched his fists, his nails almost seemed to pierce the skin of his palm, his knuckles bone-white from how much he was keeping inside everything to be her rock and shelter in that crucial moment. He then slowly moved his hand, hiding more his face in her hair when again, his skin felt the warmth of her belly; she ended up crying even more, moving her hands on his back to have a better grip on him and not allowing him to disappear

"Simon.." she fearfully looked up at him, but his face was well hidden between her long locks of hair, as he permitted himself to shed one single tear

"I'm here, you're not alone in this" he talked just above her ear to make sure she was the only one hearing

The hold they had on each other recounted many stories, all the stories that in seven years they could not tell each other.

The thin then thick layer of sweat that covered both their bodies, their heavy breaths, the burning yet pleasant feeling on his back, the ache in her wrists that made her feel at home, protected, with him at her side.

"You're not going anywhere anymore, for a looong time" she slowed said, quietly chuckling and caressing Simon's nape with her fingers, resting her head on his shoulder and closing her eyes, enjoying every single movement of Simon's hands on her body.

He hid his nose in the crook of her neck, bathing his senses in the perfume he missed so much but was too reluctant to admit, too caught up with that feeling -too nostalgic for him- of her fingers slowly untangling the knots in his hair, now much longer than she remembers it. "I'm not going anywhere, and neither will you" he surrounded her waist with his arm, improvising a probable wrestling move to reverse them and find himself on top of her, resting on her chest and playing with that old necklace she still wore

"You could've avoided that" she laughed with the little breath that Simon's graceful fall on her had left her, taking advantage of their new position to frame his face with her hands, slowly passing her thumbs on the dark signs under his eyes, smiling as his face relaxed under her touch.

He took her almost threat literally when not even two full years later, he gave Taka the tiny box containing the ring she still wore, the two of them framed in the pink of the cherry blossoms, his face full of uneasiness and pure panic, properly hidden under his poker face. His ways of doing so clumsy about anything involved exposing his feelings was one of the things that won her over in the first place that distant day when he asked her out for the first time; seeing them again that day was everything she could ask.

She continued to flip page after page, following sometimes the rhythm of the slow songs that the old stereo played, stopping sometimes to better look at those pictures that caught her eye, mostly the ones where there was a little Simon. She looked away for more than a second after at least half an hour when she felt her shirt being pulled from underneath, resting her gaze on that little head full of raven hair that emerged from the small shelter she had made with what was one of Simon's haori "Not hungry anymore?" she passed her finger on her round cheeks, taking her wail as an answer and moving her away from her chest. She made her daughter comfortable on her lap and brought back the photo album to her "You've become so much bigger, I don't know where to put you anymore" she chuckled touching the baby's nose as she tried to mutter "here", patting her mother's knees "Look, in this photo daddy was around your age, he was such a handsome boy was he?" she knew that her daughter was understanding, but just couldn't answer properly, so she just kept talking to her, telling her some stories that her aunt told her about her dad when he was little. At some point, her daughter stole the album from her hands to see the pictures in herself; she took the opportunity to rearrange her clothes, checking how the skin of her lower abdomen was doing, bad of course...

Her mind was brought back to reality when a tiny hand touched the scar on her stomach "Hm? What? You got out of there you know" she tickled that tiny hand with her fingers, sitting back next to her when she tried to run from the tease. She combed her hair with her hand, each time with more and more pressure until the little one fell again with her head on her lap "Today you were bad at mom's work, anything to say in your defense?" but all the baby could do was yawning and try to move her hand away from her head, something that made the older woman smile, leaving her daughter alone to let her rest.

The newfound peace was once again disturbed when a certain noisy hawk entered the door "I'm home" that serious voice preceded the sound of Simon's footsteps headed for the living room

"Yeah, could've guessed that" she laughed quietly, pulling her head back against the couch to look at him

"How are you feeling?" he reached down to kiss her forehead before giving attention to her lips too.

She captured his neck with her arms before he could walk away "Beside the constant stomach cramps and some dizziness, I'm healthy as a fish" she smiled, taking some of his hair in her hands and giving small kisses around his lips

"If you put on your IV once in a while, maybe you’d feel even better" he scolded her sighing, trying to detach her arms from around his neck

"If I have to stay with her, I prefer not to put it" she placed a hand on her daughter's head, keeping her eyes on his "And besides, it's cumbersome and useless at this point" she titled her head, looking away from him, feeling on her skin the cold and serious look he was giving her

"Don't even say it as a joke" he sighed, freeing himself from her arm before walking away.

She remained silent, looking at the cloudy sky of that evening for some seconds before slowly sliding away from under the sleeping form of her daughter "Not joking" she whispered to herself before reaching, staggering a little, her husband "Aura came to check on us this afternoon and brought me some albums with photos of when you two were younger" she smiled softly, helping him to take off his coat and jacket, placing them on the table chair. The only answer she received from him was his embarrassed face and his tries to hide it in all its redness "Don't worry, your daughter too agrees on the fact that you were handsome even when you were the one wearing the diaper" she placed her hands on his tie, bursting out laughing as their eyes met "Don't give me that look! You were such an handsome baby! Your eyes were as sharp as now and I love that" she kissed the tip of his nose as she removed his tie from his neck

"If those albums fall in my hands, they're gone. I'm telling you" he huffed, unbuttoning the first buttons of his shirt to let that feeling of warmth in his face dissipate

"Don't you dare! I want to do a whole family photo album, so I need those too" she hugged again his neck, hanging with a little extra weight when her legs suddenly gave up "So when she grows up, she'll have some physical memories too" she said, pointing to the sofa with her head

"These ideas only come to you" he held her on her feet, keeping her chest against his and resting his cheek on top of her head

"But you can't say they're bad" she giggled, slipping a hand into his shirt and unbuttoning another of its buttons

"You want to undress me?" he stared her hand, passing a pair of fingers on it.

She smiled foolishly, rubbing her face on his chest to hide the warmness that she felt before she, too, began to stare at her own hand "It wouldn't be a bad show" she tightened the grip that she had on his neck, making him lower again a little towards her

"You're acting like you've never seen me naked" he sighed, smiling softly to her dumbness before hitting her forehead with his fingers.

She looked at him badly, making an offended face before hiding in the folds of his shirts. She pushed his neck further towards her until he had to step forward to avoid falling, ending up dragging him to the center of the living room "Do you remember when we used to dance here? When you came back to work at a decent time?"

"When you dragged me against my will to try clumsy steps with background music you would say; I remember that"

"That's the same thing for my ears" she punched him and just stayed where she was, breathing slowly to calm the pain she was feeling in her stomach. She looked up again when she felt his arms tighten around her, intent on moving her slowly in a rocking movement

"Can you move or does it hurts too much?" he took the hand that was on his neck in his, keeping the other on her lower back.

She laughed quietly, squeezing his hand and standing well "First you say that you don't like dancing-"

"Let's do it while you can" he smiled and moved her, following the music that kept going from before

"Such a tsundere" she came even closer to him, keeping his hand tightly in hers.

"If I had known that having a typical Japanese wedding would have led to having to wear ten layers of kimono, I probably would have said no when you asked" she fixed her obi one more time, checking if her hair was in place

"But you indeed looked good all in white" he helped her tighten the obi, keeping staring at her "Even if you still have that old and overused thing that ruins your dr-"

"You on the other hand, haven't changed your pallette even today" she cut him nonchalantly and looked at him, fixing his haori, touching with her fingers the two tiny crests of his family embroidered on it

"That's a fundamental trait of my character" he took her by the arm and walked where the guests were

"Then the fact that you got your hair done today is totally out of your character" she played with the braid full of flowers that fell on his back, sticking to his arm "But it suits you a lot" she smiled satisfied when she saw red tips building in his cheeks

"Maybe, but all these flowers make it too fancy for my liking" he tried to sidetrack the conversation, looking away from hers so as not to let her enjoy his shyness.

She stopped insisting, keeping tight his hand in hers as they walked again where all the others were "Well, I must say that if I have to find one positive thing in all of this, seeing Aura in a kimono is probably the best thing I could ever ask in my life" she whispered to him when her eyes met the almost completely drunk figure of Aura dressed in a colorful kimono

"Yeah, sorry for that" Simon sighed and covered his eyes with his hand

"Come on! She's trying to avoid thinking that her beloved little brother is leaving her for another woman" she nudged him and looked at him with an annoying smirk

"Don't make it worse please" he walked with her out on the balcony, looking at the sky before whistling and pull out an arm, waiting for a pair of delicate claws to clasp his wrist "You're the only that understand me" he scratched Taka's neck, smiling softly when the smaller hand of his wife tried to pet him too "You're too short"

"No! You're the one who's too tall! And you might as well put your arm down you know!" she tried to pull it down, failing miserably

"Maybe it's finally time to change that thing around your neck" he noticed, pointing to the necklace that, even today, she kept wearing "Na-ah, I will only change it when it becomes dust on my hands" she used his moment of distraction to pat too Taka's soft feathers, watching again that simple-looking but full of meaning ring on her finger.

Still today, after nearly two full years, that ring continued to adorn her finger; she hid more and more in his shirt until she placed her ear precisely over his heart, listening carefully to each of its beats

"You okay?" he passed a hand on her face, bringing his face close to her to place a brief kiss on her head

"What was the name of the colored coat I wore for our wedding?" she tried to remember all the times Simon told her, but couldn't remember

"Uchikake" he said it slowly, so that she could understand it "Why you ask?"

"I was thinking that it was really beautiful. I should still have it somewhere in the closet" she closed her eyes, hoping that thinking about those memories, would send her back and live them again

"If you want, one day we could dress as we were that day, just to relive the emotion" he some of her hair locks, playing with them

"One day?" she slowly looked up at him, but it only quickened the climb of her tears to the eyes "You know, if I hadn’t tried to get closer to you after those seven years, when you got out of prison, we probably wouldn’t be here at this point; if I had been away I would have avoided that you suffered again" she squeezed his shirt in her hand, sighing loudly to mask the returning feeling of tears. Last year was the first and last time she cried for herself, knowing she had no right to be sad when she knew she was leaving Simon all alone, again.

"If you hadn’t come back, I would have come, I wouldn’t have left you so easily" he hit her head and placed his palm on her eyes, pushing her head downwards "If you hadn’t come back to catching me, yeah, we probably wouldn’t be here right now, but now there wouldn’t even be that evil thing" he took off his hand from her face to let her see where he was pointing

"Can you please stop calling her a thing?!" she took his hands off her, backing away and wiping the wetness around her eyes with her arm

"You're the only one who takes it so badly" he remained near her, seeing her legs more unstable than normal

"You know, for your information, your daughter is a person too" she gave him a killer look, ready to throw anything at him

"In my eyes, as of now, she's a round being who does nothing but eat, sleep and cry all day" he smiled at his own words as he strived to remain serious as he spoke "And other things that are not very nice anyway" he dodged the bottle she threw at him, trying to catch it before it fell; trying.

The sound of the plastic that crashed on the ground was followed shortly after by some incomprehensible complaints "It's your fault, just so you know" he stopped her and threw her like a sack on a chair before going towards the couch and search that little being that who could make such loud sounds "Are we done here?" he took her from the legs, tickling her to not let her cry too much

"Come here, hurry" she waited already with her arms wide open "Have you heard what this evil bichrome man said? Mh? What is daddy saying about you?" she took her in her arms and hid her in her neck cavity "Can you stop saying these things?" she pouted at him while calming the baby

"These are just pieces of evidence of my incapacity as a father" he sighed and looked back at her, keeping his impassive face

"Oh really? In my eyes these actions only show that you're good at this, you know how to joke with her" she gave him a proud smile to let him understand she was sincere

"And you see this as a posit-"

"Look! The more I look at her the more I realize that she might not have taken anything from my genes" she interrupted his words, standing up in front of him and showing the baby's face to him "Her eyes are exactly like yours; sharp, grey and absolutely beautiful; her hair is black, but she has some shades of Aura's purple in it and being pale is a family thing, I guess" she tilted her head to see Simon's face as she talked, smiling softly at him

"Maybe she’ll have something of yours growing, something about your personality or she'll change her features during growth" he poked the round cheeks he had in front of him

"I hope for you both no, you want another liar in your family?" she laughed confused, passing a hand on his shoulder.

He didn't answer but just sighed, taking her arm and moving onto the couch "You're not on your feet anymore, come and sit" he sat her comfortably on him and hugged her tightly, hiding his nose in her locks, now much shorter than last year but still welcoming.

She quietly beat her foot to the beat of the music, looking around the large hall full of people, looking for familiar faces

"Why you're here all alone? You could at least sit somewhere" the familiar raven-haired boy approached her with a simple glass of something in his hands

"I'm still new here, so I'd rather stay alone for now" she smiled turning towards the young prosecutor "What about you? You're not with your sister?" she looked around her to see that extravagant hairstyle that she always has

"She's talking to Cykes-dono, so I left them alone" he slowly sipped his drink "You want to take something to drink too?" he pointed with his glass towards the table full of every kind of drinks

"I'll pass, for now I would like to stay sober” she sharpened her ears to the music, finally hearing something danceable

“Instead, would you like to dance?” she came closer to him and grabbed his jacket

“No? I don’t know how to dance at all” he laughed uncomfortably, trying to stop her hand from dragging him

“Me neither, we just go there and have some fun” she poked him with her shoulder to convince him

“Pleeease” she took his glass from his hands and hid it behind her back

“Just this one” she didn’t even wait for his answer before dragging him towards the empty space in the middle of the hall, placing his glass on the first table in her way, letting some hair get in front of her face to hide her blush before turning to him again, smiling softly.

The face he held for all the time they danced brought a smile and a quiet giggle to the woman’s mouth

“What are you laughing about?” Simon, took her hair away from her face, looking down at her

“Nothing nothing, I was just rethinking of some memories, and I remembered the first time we danced together; do you remember?” she placed her head on his shoulder, trying to keep her look upwards

“That time when you nearly fell on your own feet to keep me dancing? Yeah, I remember” he laughed too to the memory, moving his hand under her chin to keep her face

“Remember me more, anything it comes to your mind”

“But you already know my whole life by heart, you were there for the most” her eyes closed for some seconds, letting her relax in his hold

“…Who’s gonna tell me, then?” his fingers closed more around her face, looking at every single of her features with the saddest eyes he ever had in his life

She forced her eyes to open again to look at him, hugging his wrist with her slim, white and freezing fingers, a touch that gave him all the comfort he needed

“Hurry up or the stars will fall without you” she huffed, trying not to raise her voice too much

“Sorry sorry” Simon huffed too, climbing the last steps of the staircase to the outdoor terrace

“The sky is pure black tonight” she was already looking through her telescope, searching for even one shooting star

“Nothing?” he stretched his body and rubbed his eyes, ready to fall asleep at any moment

“Not yet” she checked her clock, before quickly returning to look at the sky

“If my calculations are right, ten minutes maximum and the first ones should start to appear”

“Repeat again why these stars are so interesting?” he shook his head from exhaustion and leaned his back against the wall

“Because! Today they should be of many different colors instead of always white!” she hit him, falsely offended by his disinterest, pointing towards the sky once again out of nowhere.

Her memory listed all the constellations she could recognize from what little she saw

“See? You’re good at remembering all the laws, the details of a case, the lessons of Dr. Cykes, and I’m good at remembering the constellations” she laughed at herself before looking at him, catching right behind him a reddish shooting star

“THERE!” her voice came out before she could control the volume, covering her mouth with both hands right after that

“There’s another and another one there” Simon tried not to laugh at her unwanted scream and just looked at the stars that fell in front of his eyes

“What do people say about shooting stars?” his back pulled away from the wall and approached her, tilting his head

“It’s said that a wish you express under a shooting star comes true and other things that date back to the era of Christ and-“

His hand took hers, stopping her words while he still looked at the now colorful sky

“How likely is the wish to come true?”

“I-It’s just a stupid belief, don’t tell me you believe it please” she shook her head and looked too at the sky

“Let’s see right now if I’ll start to believe in it” he pulled her towards him from the hands, waiting for her to turn her head his way before approaching her lips with his, giving her some seconds to pull away but finalizing his intention when she did not move, savoring every little feeling the sensation of her soft lips on his gave him.

As soon as the connection broke, he turned his face sideways to hide the tremendous blush on all his face

“Maybe I could give the stars a try for my next trials”.

“Of all the things, that’s what you had to remember?” he giggled slowly, rubbing his blushed cheek against the crown of her head

“That was probably the cutest thing you ever did” she touched his uncovered cheek, warming her hand thanks to Simon’s warmth

“Most embarrassing, you meant” he cocked a smile when he felt her elbow hit, try to hit, his ribs

“You don’t even realize how romantic you can be” she raised her hand and showed him the silver around her ring finger

“I think you don’t remember well enough”

“Just some more steps, trust me and don’t open your eyes”

“Not that I have a choice by now” she kept her hand on Simon’s to better understand where he was leading her.

All she could feel was the damp grass under her feet, the sweet spring breeze against her ankles, uncovered by the thin fabric of her yukata.

She could hear the distant beating of Taka’s wings as he flew around them; if she tried to open her eyes, they were greeted by the black of Simon’s palms.

All she could do was following his footsteps behind her.

“Ok, when you want to, you can open your eyes” he slowly took his hands off her face in case she had already opened them.

She peeked from one eye to see where they were before looking better with both of her eyes.

In front of her was probably the tallest cherry tree she has ever seen, full of tiny, pink flowers both on the branches and between the thin blades of grass that took a more orange hue thanks to the light of the sunset; nestled between two external roots was a colorful cloth that prevented a basket from being in contact with the wet of the grass.

She turned towards him with a surprised smile, placing her hands against his arms to hold on to something as she came near his face with hers

“Thank you, this is sweet” she murmured against his cheek, sliding her hand all the way from his arm to his nape to hug him.

He hugged her back for a few seconds, before using his arms around her to pick her up and carry her where they were awaited; he knew perfectly that they weren’t going to move anywhere soon if he waited for her to move first.

He could feel her mouth against his skin, kissing it softly, curving in excited and grateful smiles, brushing against the skin under his ear.

He almost threw her to the ground when they arrived, quickly passing his hand wherever he could still feel her passage as if it annoyed him before sitting next to her, huffing.

“So? You have something important to tell me?” she pressed her arm against his, looking at his impassible face as he took something out of the basket, offering it to her

“I may have brought you here just to see the cherry blossoms” he shrugged her off his arm, looking at her to enjoy both her pout and the contrasting happy eyes as she ate what he gave her

“As if I don’t know you, Blackquill” she tried to mimic his face, failing in seriousness because of her full mouth

“Don’t, call me that” he hit her elbow to make her food fall, sighing quietly as she tried to pick it up.

They just remained there, enjoying their presence in that ordinary silence that spoke more of hundreds of words.

Simon was never good with socializing, vocalizing his emotions; the only time he considered himself good with words was when he’s working, in a courtroom or an interrogation room.

She had to get used to his being, trying to help him improve, but when his emotions were too strong, he just closes himself.

He closes all the doors to his heart locked, with chains and locks by any external intruder –an art he learned and mastered in not even seven years of his life- .

“Am I pregnant and I still don’t know about it?” she tilted his head, approaching her face to his with a confused look that covered her true one, worried, as she tried to throw down those doors even now.

He nearly choked on his food at her words, looking even more confused than her

“How do I know if you don’t even know first?”

“Then do you want to tell me what’s wrong? At least before the sun goes down?” she gently brushed her finger against his nose, smiling at him to try to make him laugh

“Nothing serious, really. I-I just need to understand how to phrase it” he took her wrist and slowly moved her hand from his face

“Sooo, it is serious if it’s giving you problems” she giggled as she took something else from the basket

“Do you think Taka will enjoy something too?” she stood up and walked into a much-opened space, looking at the sky to see where Taka was

“Wait-” he tried to stop her before she stood, still managing to make her turn by calling her

“What? I took a piece of meat without too much flavoring; he can eat this” she warned before he could start with his usual lecture

“No, that’s not it” he sat up straighter, placing his hand on his knee as if to get up.

In his mind hundreds and hundreds of thought ran back and forth, his brain was trying his best not to melt, until he fell back, letting her call Taka

“Be careful when he catches your arm” he rested his back against the tree, gripping tightly his sleeve to relieve tension, to prepare himself

“Don’t pierce my arm pleease” as soon as Taka rested on her arm, she patted his head before giving him the piece of meat she took earlier

“Hey prosecutor man, when were you going to show me this new bandana?” her fingers touched the soft material of it, passing one of them slowly into the space between the feathery neck and the fabric

“You’re even more handsome than before; this color suits you” she scratched his feathers, giggling softly as he brushed his face against her hand.

She already started to walk back towards Simon when she noticed something dangling from Taka’s bandana

“You also gave him a pendant? Can I see it?” she shifted her eyes from Simon to Taka as she asked one question, then the other, taking the little box-like pendant tied to Taka’s bandana between her fingers.

She focused to untie the knot that probably Simon did, then moving the hawk on her shoulder to better observe it

“Don’t worry, I’ll give it right back” she gently hit his beak with her nail to have his attention

“What is it, Simon? Can I open it?” she opened the second after she asked, not even waiting for an answer that probably would never have arrived.

It was simple, shiny like a freshly cleaned panel of glass. On the surface, a lot of details framed a tiny, clear gem placed in opposition to the engraving of Simon’s family crest that he always wore, one way or another.

She reluctantly lifted her eyes from the ring, scared that it would disappear in front of her, to look at Simon who was still sitting on the ground, but had looked up to offer her one of those barely hinted smiles that were full of all kinds of emotions, those unconstrained smiles that she loved so much seeing.

“So?” her voice cracked, slipping out of her control, having the need to understand what he meant with this gesture

“ “So?” What? As if I gift you these things daily” he used all his energy to hide how much he was enjoying her expressions

She threw herself on him, pressing on purpose her knee against his stomach

“Instead of killing me, can I speak?” he tried to laugh with the limited air that she left him

“Will you marry me? Will you tolerate me as long as your lungs take air?” he spoke against her hair, taking the box from her hand, gently spreading her fingers to take it

“I’ve been tolerating you for years now” she composed herself before looking up, smiling when she felt his hand take hers

“Yes- Yes, I’ll gladly do that” she tried not to cry openly as the metal slowly brushed against the skin of her ring finger

“I hope you realize the trouble you’re getting yourself into” he tapped his shoulder, gesturing Taka to climb it, to involve him

“You should have warned me a decade ago” she squinted and gripped Simon’s hand as strong as possible, letting the tears that were hidden in her eyes fall

“You have a point, but if I did I wouldn't have had any benefit out of it” he hugged her head with his chin, pushing it towards his chest.

His rough thumb slowly stroked her now decorated hand; she emitted heat from every pore, the adrenaline still ran in her body and that made her hand a bit sweaty, but warm to the right.

They were in the same positions now; his chin on her head, her hand wrapped in his fingers, Taka on the couch’s backrest.

The feelings were what changed; her hand, ice, her breath, slow and irregular, his cheek, cold from the now dried tears, both their hearts, heavy and facing everything but reality.

Only her lap remained warm, short raven hair spread all over it and tiny hands that tried to grab the two adults’ shirts to sit up.

“You two should go to sleep now, we can continue tomorrow, maybe before I go to work” he forced his lips to form a smile as he looked at her, noting her eyes full of exhaustion

“I could sleep for a while, yes” she got off him, clinging to his shoulders to make up for her lack of strength “And you could change your clothes, I feel uncomfortable just by looking at you” she looked at him, not even trying to hide her smile

“Easy to talk with Simon’s shirt on huh?” he took the hand-sized girl out of the two in his arms before forcing the oldest on his shoulder, bringing both of them to their bedroom

“It certainly is more comfortable than your work shirts” she tapped her hand against his back, trying to free herself, and she was indeed satisfied when he dropped her like a sack of potatoes on the mattress “Do you always treat corpses like this?” she rolled until her face smeared on Simon’s pillow

“Most of the time even worse than this” he used his daughter’s hand to hit her head, pushing it towards the pillow by making the little one lay on it

“Not breathing-“ she tried to grab her daughter to move her before freeing her face, making the baby laugh with her annoyed snort

“You’re just like your father,-”

“If you’re a corpse, you’re not supposed to breath” he looked at her out of the corner of his eye as he was already undressing

“Then just the time you change and I’m back to being one” her eyes locked with his and she smiled, looking down at her baby who imitated her position, now both looking at Simon

“See how beautiful your dad is?” she whispered so as not to be heard by Simon, tickling the baby’s neck to make her giggle

“I feel observed” he smiled to himself as he slowly chose what to wear

“Oh well sorry you very edgy, shy, handsome, young man” she kept staring at him some more before turning to give him some privacy.

She started tickling her daughter again, taking from her nightstand the stuffed hawk they kept there for when they made her sleep with them

“Is this better than the real one?” she poked her cheeks with the toy’s beak, smiling when her tiny hands hugged the soft replica

“The real one is there, looking rather offended in my opinion” Simon pointed the branch near the bed even if neither of the two were looking at him

“I would give him some attention if I were you”

“He’s just like you, too. I’m surrounded” she tried to imitate Simon’s whistle to call Taka to her, placing her hand on the headboard to indicate him where to lean

“When you’ll learn not to hit her, she can play with you too” she scratched his neck, passing her fingers between his feathers, then to the ones around her neck.

She searched for the hook of the necklace to take it off, combing the ruined feathers with her nails

“It is finally time to throw it away?” he joined her on the soft bed, brushing his nose against her nape before searching a point that made her shiver where to press his lips on

“Never, ever. When I can no longer express my opinion, you can do whatever you want with it” she shivered as she felt his lips against her skin, trying to get away from him

“What do you want me to do with it?” he continued to cover her skin with butterfly kisses, catching her thigh to not let her run away

“I would like to keep it, but it would be a waste; you could give it to her when she grows up or yes, you can throw it too” she put her fingers between his hair, messing it up as also her lower body shivered

“I’ll think about it” he touched the feathers too, noticing how they were ruined

“Can I at least change these? Taka is losing a lot of feathers recently”

“If they ruin badly, I shall allow it” she touched her nose and tried to turn to face him.

“Shouldn’t she sleep?” he picked their daughter in his arms before sitting up to give her space to get comfortable

“She slept before you came back, I don’t know if she will now” she yawned and found a comfortable place on Simon’s lap, resting her head on his shoulder

“But I probably will. Tomorrow a new engineer comes to help us with the next probe at the center” she forced her eyes to remain open, taking in the sight of Simon trying to make the little one sleep, slowly rocking her

“You should stay home. You’re getting worse and you should rest” he took her hair off her face with his free hand, getting the evidence he needed to confirm what he was saying: the eye bags under her eyes were darker every day more, her skin was almost as pale as his, her hairline was constantly covered with a thin layer of sweat and against his skin, hers was cold, dry, dead.

She looked and felt like she was already a corpse, a corpse he never had wanted to see.

“At this point is useless to rest, this last period is worth spending it doing something rather than staying at home, on the couch, filling myself with medicines” she tried her best to keep her head straight, fighting against pain, unusual sleepiness, physical fatigue.

“Would you- please, stay awake as long as you can” he put his hand under her chin to lift her face towards his, kissing her forehead.

This sweet gesture made her smile again, hugging his cheek with her palm softly

“I’ll try” she moved his bangs from his eyes “Pardon me” she took his ponytail, searching his hair tie and freeing his hair from it

“What are you doing” he sighed, suffering what she was doing anyway as their daughter slowly fell asleep

“Fixing your bangs. You should cut them, your eyes are covered and it is really a crime” she collected the hair on his forehead, tieing it in a really small ponytail, holding back her laughter at the result

“I don’t even want to see myself” he sighed harder, focusing only on loaf in his arms

“Why! Your eyes are visible like this!”

“If you care so much you can cut it for me, I don’t know how to do it” he took her face and pushed her off him, again on the mattress “In law classes, they don’t teach you how to be a hairstyler, too” he untangled some knots from his now-free hair, taking off the tie from his bangs, styling it so that it did not cover his eyes

“Neither in space engineering” she hugged her pillow and closed her eyes, feeling them as dry as a desert

“Hey,” he lowered once again near her, carefully laying the fully asleep baby between them

“Do you want to sleep?” he passed a hand on her hair, taking away the locks that kept falling from her head

“That wouldn’t hurt you know” she looked at him, keeping her eyes closed for more seconds when she blinked

“If I fall asleep, please, don’t wake me up, we’ll see tomorrow, ok?” she smiled once again, extending a hand towards his face and placing it on his cheek

“Remember me to bring back to Aura the albums she brought me today” she nodded as if she was listening to herself, but slowly her brain started to turn off

“Yes, after work I’ll come to pick you up and we can go together” he was convinced in what he was saying, but something gripped tightly his chest

“I’ll wait for you then” whatever she was saying now, was nearly an incomprehensible murmur, her eyes were closed and her hand fell on their daughter’s head.

He remained there, all he could do was staring at her, her chest that slowly rose and fell, her face that showed peace, but under it lied everything she truly felt: anger, sadness, guilt and fear.

She was tired of those feelings, all that she wanted was to enjoy the little time she knew she had left with her family.

Even if she didn’t saw him at the moment, she could imagine Simon’s face, what he was feeling, too.

She didn’t want to ruin his life like this.

He already suffered in his life and this, leaving him alone out of nowhere with a child to raise all by himself when he was the one against the idea of children. What convinced him to even try in the first place was the assurance that he wouldn’t be alone in properly raising a child, she promised it to him. But now?

“Simon” she shook his arm to be sure he was listening to her, not sure of how her voice sounded

“I’m here” he took her hand to let her know he was listening, moving closer to her

“.I’..m sorry” she tried to re-open her eyes again to sound more sincere in her apology “You know that… I love you” she forced herself to sound as clear as she could, squinting and trying to open her eyes

“Don’t force yourself by saying stupid things. You have nothing to be sorry about and-“

“Saying that I love you is a stupid thing?” she looked at him confused and with tears all over her eye

He passed his thumbs on her cheeks to wipe those tears, stopping for a second to look her in the eyes

“Of course not. You did everything for me and I still don’t know how to thank you properly. You helped me when I came back, you tolerated me all these years and also officially linked yourself to the mess that I am and- and you gifted me this, you gave me a reason to keep moving forward” he passed his thumb on her rings before resting both their hands, still connected, on their daughter’s belly.

Her eyes closed again but she was listening to every single word, every single crack or tremor of his voice, the sound of his breath becoming irregular. The words she wanted to speak died in her throat and all she managed to do successfully was smiling, offering him a smile that could maybe comfort him, that could give voice to the apologies she wanted to scream, to the regret and sadness that were eating her from the inside.

“Now sleep, you deserve some rest. You’re strong, don’t forget it” he covered her eyes with his palm and gently pressed his lips against hers, smiling softly when he felt her attempt to answer to his kiss, pushing her lower face against his “And I love you too, you can’t even imagine how much. I’ll never stop doing it, remember it.” He reluctantly took his hand off her face, noticing even more tears on it, trying to wipe them again with his trembling fingers.

He knew what was happening, but at the same time, he didn’t know, didn’t want to know.

His eyes searched comfort looking up, where Taka still was on the headboard; him too, was asleep. Loneliness, this feeling Simon knows too well and that he knows it will come to visit him more often from now on. His eyes closed and before he knew it, he fell asleep too; both his hands were against a cold feeling that, as he lost more and more consciousness, started to feel warm again.

- Same time, same sound every single morning. He could already hear giggles and fire sounds from the kitchen, so he just sat to slam his palm against the alarm to shut it off.

It didn’t.

Even if his palm was still on it, the alarm continued to ring. He had to shook his head to be back, the newfound feeling of warmth in his chest kicked away by the sudden cold. He stood and walked to the door, opening it and seeing only the first lights of the morning light up the way to the kitchen, hearing anything but silence. He looked back confused and that’s when he remembered; he remembered that his wife was dying, but just now realized that what yesterday was future, now is present.

She laid there, in her side of the bed; her whole body but the face covered with simple blankets, her facial features molded with peace, calm, relief. Everything was framed by her hair and covered with the reddish lights of the sunrise that highlighted details that only confirmed her departed state: her lips were now tinted with a slight violet, her eyes were slightly opened and the little that was visible was completely dull, not a single muscle was tense and her skin took a greenish tone.

He forced himself to confirm what he was seeing, gently caressing her cheeks, jawline and lastly her neck, searching for anything else than a block of pure ice.

Useless.

The sun outside seemed to know what was happening: the sun, now full of light and free of any cover slowly continued to rise, probably not noticing the expanse of clouds that awaited him to hide him, keep him away from the world.

Before she could wake up, he brought the unaware raven head away from there; even if she probably couldn’t understand, she didn’t deserve to even look at her mother’s dead body. He was still trying to understand, to process everything, but his brain did all it could to reject everything that was happening, to deny it; that’s probably why, when he returned to their shared room, he felt a punch right in the gut seeing Taka that tried to wake her up, beating his head against hers.

She didn’t move a single inch when he was out and Taka’s usual tease to wake her up wasn’t working.

“Taka” a concise movement of his chin made the hawk understand to leave her alone, taking his place beside her, fearful of touching her again and perceive again the feeling of touching a grave, touching death. “We need to give the albums back to Aura and- today the engineer at the center” he tried to catch her attention, shaking her face with a little too much vigor, but nothing seemed to move her “Or, you still have to remind me of our first date, of when our daughter was-“ the end of the phrase died as his fist instinctively met the wall nearby, as one single tear accidentally fell from his eye.

His feet moved on their own and made him walk out of there, out of where he was already promising himself to remain. He rested his back against the wall, slamming his head against it too to stop any strong emotion to take control of his body.

His fingers moved his bangs from his eyes to fully understands if he was still sleeping; unluckily not.

His thighs rested flat against the floor, his back slowly sliding down to accompany them and before he could punch the wall down, he focused on the heavy pocket of his pants, pulling out of it the necklace she entrusted to him. Looking at it now, it looked newer than it actually was; yesterday the feathers looked old and ruined, but now he saw them as fresh and immaculate.

He laughed to himself and brought the cheap pendant to his lips, finally understanding what she saw in something he made only for her, brushing once again the feathers of it.

---

A short message for you all ;v;

#ace attorney #simon blackquill #simon blackquill x reader #angst #aura blackquill #x reader but not even that much

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slytherinbarnes · 4 years ago

Text

Sub Rosa [58]

xiii. praimfaya

Pairing: Bellamy Blake x reader

Word Count: 4.6k

Warnings: angst, mentions of radiation sickness/poisoning, injuries, stitching up wounds.

Summary: the end is near, praimfaya approaches. a last minute plan to go to space leaves your small group scrambling to get ready in time.

a/n: IT’S HERE THE FINALE IS HERE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK BC IT HELPS ME A LOT TO DETERMINE IF THERE IS INTEREST IN SUB ROSA CONTINUING!!! OKAY I LOVE YOU LITTLE MOONS!!! the taglist for this series is open! I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!!!

previous chapter // season masterlist // series masterlist

March 21st, 2150; Becca’s Lab; less than 2 hours until Praimfaya

The planning that goes into sending 9 people into space is a lot more intense than you expected. You spend the next couple of hours trying to figure everything out, get the rocket modified, and informing those in the bunker of your plans. Right now, you are in the office with Bellamy, sitting near the radio, talking to Octavia. He just told her everything, down to the smallest of your plans, letting her know exactly what challenges you’re facing, and she seems surprised that you’re even doing this. “Five years. Can you really survive up there?”

“Raven says we can. As soon as it's safe, we'll find a way back down. We will meet again.”

“I'll be waiting…” She pauses, giving the moment a dramatic effect before finishing, “Under the floor.”

“You're not that little girl anymore.” He sits back, waiting for her response, met with nothing but silence. He glances at you and then over to the radio, his brotherly instincts kicking in. “What is it, O?”

“I'm not sure I'm up for this, Bell. They look at me like I know what I'm doing, just because I won a fight.”

“They look at you like that because you saved them, but it won't last. Now you have to lead.”

“How? I'm not a leader. It should be you or one of the twins or-”

He cuts her off, nipping the insecurity in the bud. “O, stop. None of us could've done what you did, and it wasn't just winning a fight. You gave people hope when there was none. You're Prometheus, stealing fire from the gods and giving it back to the human race.”

You smile at your history nerd, proud of his metaphor, and Octavia jokes, “Prometheus got chained to a rock so that eagles could eat his liver.”

“Thanks for ruining my metaphor, O.”

You and Bellamy laugh, and you can hear Octavia laughing on the other end before she gets serious again. “I love you, big brother. Guess it takes the end of the world for me to say it.”

He drops his head, and you can see him fighting back tears, after weeks of desperately wanting to hear the words from his little sister. “I love you, too.”

He lets go of the button, and a static that wasn't there before comes through, growing louder and quieter every few seconds. Bellamy looks at the radio in confusion, and then fear, as he questions, “O? Hey, O, are you there?”

When she doesn't answer, he fiddles with the dials, and you stand from your chair nearby and come to settle beside him on the couch, placing your hand on his thigh as he repeats, “Are you there, O?”

When nothing comes through, he drops his head again, the tears threatening to fall, before he pushes them away and whispers, “May we meet again.”

You echo, “May we meet again.”

The door to the office opens and Clarke steps inside, looking happy, blissfully unaware that the radio cut out before you could talk to your mom. She smiles at you, “Hey, do they have her?”

“The radio's dead, we won't get to say goodbye to mom.”

Her face falls at your words and you stand and walk over to her, pulling her into a hug as she starts to cry. You comfort her, feeling your own wash of sadness, and you feel Bellamy place his hand on your shoulder, allowing you to draw strength from him. The moment doesn't last for long though, because Murphy yells from down in the lab, “Twins of Terror, Bellamy, get down here!”

You all run out of the office and down the stairs into the lab, stopping beside the others to watch the giant screens in front of you. One of Becca’s drones is situated outside of Polis, filming the tower, and in the background you can see Praimfaya approaching, the large, fiery death wave barreling towards the tower. You reach out and grab Bellamy’s and Clarke’s hands, all three of you connected as you watch the death wave cover the tower, before it knocks out the drone itself, ending the signal.

Your stomach drops as the transmission ends, aware that now, all 9 of you are well and truly alone, with no help or assistance coming from your friends and family. Raven stares at the blank screen, her voice a horrified whisper. “It's 210 miles from Polis to the island. According to what was our last drone, the wave is accelerating.”

This new challenge hits her, making her think, and she starts to whisper a list of things that need to be done for this mission to be successful. “If we're not off the ground at least 20 minutes before it hits, the electromagnetic charge in the pyroclastic cloud will shut down the rocket's avionics, meaning it won't fly. That gives us 90 minutes to run a 6 hour preflight check, retrieve the oxygen generator from the lighthouse, turn a cockpit designed for two into one that can carry 9, and load the cargo hold with enough food to keep us from starving in space while we wait for algae to bloom.”

Murphy quips, “I thought you said it was gonna be hard.”

“That's not the hard part. Becca designed her rocket to dock with Polaris, not the Ark. That means I have to pilot it into the hangar bay on the ring.”

Harper looks towards Raven, shaking her head in confusion. “What's so hard about that?”

“That's not the hard part, either.”

Clarke starts to grow exasperated and she looks over at Raven. “What is the hard part, Raven?”

“Assuming we blast off in time, CO2 scrubbers on a two person rocket won't support 9 of us.”

You shrug, “So, we use supplemental oxygen.”

Monty informs you, and the group, what makes that a challenge. “Our tanks only hold an hour of air.”

“Correct. We'll have one hour to get into orbit, land in the hangar bay, and fire up the life support system using an oxygen generator built to supply a lighthouse bachelor pad.”

Murphy looks over at Raven and deadpans, “You suck at talking people into things. You know that, right?”

“Anyone here still need to be talked into this?” Bellamy looks around at everyone, waiting for each of you to shake your head no before he looks at Raven. “Good. Now we know the many ways we might die today, why don't you tell us what we have to do to live?”

Raven turns to the monitor and pulls up a 90 minute timer for all of you to keep an eye on, before she starts to hand out assignments. “Monty and Murphy, I need the two of you to go to the lighthouse bunker and get the oxygen generator.”

She hands them the tools they’ll need and the two boys nod and quickly begin their journey. Raven turns to Harper, Emori, and Echo. “I need you three to help me get the rocket ready, run the preflight check, and pack up the food.”

They nod, awaiting further instruction, before she turns and looks over at you, Bellamy, and Clarke. “I need you to go over the plans again, thoroughly, and make sure all the calculations are correct. Otherwise, this is all for nothing. Everything is up top on the next level of the lab.”

She points you to where you need to go, and all three of you immediately head there and start to comb over the plans, schematics, and data laid out before you, ensuring everything seems correct. You’ve run through it at least three times before Bellamy gets distracted, and walks away from the table, looking out over the lab, over to where the others are preparing the rocket. You look over at him, watching him, as Clarke begins again. “So, let's go over this again. I figure two months until the algae farm produces enough food to feed us. If we ration the MREs, we should get there.”

She looks over at you and Bellamy, realizing you’re not listening, and she sighs. “I’m going to take a break. Be back in a few.”

You nod and watch as she heads towards the stairs into the main part of the lab, and you walk over to where Bellamy is standing at the railing, nervously tapping his fingers. When he sees you approach, he smiles, and shakes his head in disbelief. “Grounders in space, it's an oxymoron.”

“It was the only choice.” You smile and shrug, “Only choice, also an oxymoron, by the way.”

He turns towards you, eyes anxiously scanning over you, the way he seems to do every hour since you coughed up blood in the snow. He runs his hand over the top of your head, to the sweat gathered there, and pulls a face. “So is cold sweat. I’m still holding out hope for that Nightblood solution.”

“Seems like there was never any solution. I guess Alie was right about that.”

“Hey, Our fight isn't over, not yet.”

You shrug again, thinking of your mom’s vision that she seems so convinced of. Clarke seems to feel the same way, because every mention of it leaves her worried. “My mom had a vision of me and Clarke dying, apparently just like the one Raven had that told her there was a rocket here.”

“It is not the same thing.”

“Maybe not. But they were both EMP'd.”

“Abby will be fine, Raven told her how to stop it.”

You shake your head, Bellamy still not understanding. Maybe you’ve evaded Death too many times before and this really is it. If it is, not many people get the chance to say goodbye to the love of their life, and you’re starting to feel like you should take this rare opportunity and remind him how you feel. “That's not what I'm talking about. If anything happens to me-”

He immediately cuts you off, not wanting to hear this conversation. “Nothing is happening to you.”

He tries to walk away, deflecting, distracting, motioning towards the charts on the table. “Come on, let's run these water numbers again.”

You reach out and grab his hand, your voice and expression pleading. “Please, Bellamy, I need you to hear this.”

You wait and he nods, letting you know he’ll give you this one goodbye. You take a deep breath and begin, “You and I have been through a lot together. The moment I met you in the halls of the Ark, I thought you were an asshole. That didn't change once we got to the ground, but somehow, someway, I found myself hating you less and less with each passing day. I never would have thought that the guy that threatened me my first day on the ground would turn out to be the love of my life, but I’m so glad you are. I’m so thankful for every second that I’ve gotten to spend with you. I have loved seeing you grow from a selfish asshole into a caring leader, always willing to do anything to save his people. I trust you, I trust your heart, I trust your decisions. The only thing I ask, is that you watch your emotions, check on how you feel. Sometimes your heart rules you, my stormy love, and you make rash decisions based on how you feel. Step back, evaluate everything, and do what’s best for everyone. That’s how we’ll survive, that’s how we’ll deserve to survive.”

Tears well up in his eyes as you talk to him, eventually spilling down his cheeks as you say what might be your last goodbye. He pulls you towards him, into a kiss, pushing his feelings into it. You feel his wet tears graze your cheeks as he reminds you of his love for you, making sure you never forget that you have his heart and that he’s better for it. When he pulls away, you realize that you’re now crying too, suddenly faced with the idea that you don't want to die, you don't want to be without him. But sometimes, these things lie in the lap of the gods, and you can't control it. If Death is coming for the Bringer of Death, then so be it.

Unfortunately, a soft moment can never stay a soft moment on the ground, because chaos always strikes at some point. This moment is no exception, as a giant zapping sound comes from inside the rocket, followed by Raven’s loud cry of anger. You and Bellamy turn to look at the rocket in alarm before you run down the stairs, meeting up with Clarke at the bottom before you run over to the rocket and peek inside, looking down at Raven who is waving smoke away from her head. “Raven, what is it?”

“Oh, there isn't enough time. We're pushing too hard.”

Bellamy shakes his head, giving her a concerned look. “What's happening?”

She ignores him and calls out, “Computer, systems check.”

“Launch system...optimal. Navigation system...optimal. Life support system...assessing damage.”

Raven waves off the worry she sees crossing your faces. “It's okay, we're using supplemental, anyway.”

“All life support systems are offline.”

She nods, holding a finger up at the three of you. “Just wait, two more.”

“Landing system...optimal. Communication system...assessing damage.” She drops her head, looking slightly worried as she awaits the verdict. “All communication systems are offline.”

“Recommend repair options for communication system.”

Harper looks her way, not understanding your pilot’s worry. “Who cares? There's no one to talk to, anyway.”

“Quiet.”

“Damage is beyond repair. Total system replacement required.”

Raven sits frozen in place, staring off into the distance, and Bellamy looks at her, concerned. “Talk to us, Raven.”

“We're not going anywhere.” She looks over at the fried panel, before she storms out of the rocket, yelling at the computer as she leaves, “Computer, terminate launch sequence.”

You, Bellamy, and Clarke exchange a worried look before you all hurry after her, and Harper, Emori, and Echo join you as you come to a stop around Raven. She’s staring down at a tablet in her hand, and you try to get her attention. “Raven, explain.”

“It's simple, there's no power in the ring. Two minutes ago, I thought it wasn't a problem because I could activate it remotely.”

Clarke nods her head, starting to understand. “Over the rocket's comms system.”

Bellamy shrugs, and tries to offer a solution, “So we turn the power on from the inside. “

“We can't get inside, that's the point. Without power, we can't even open the hangar door.”

Clarke steps closer to her, trying to diffuse the situation. “Raven, think. You've solved bigger problems than this before.”

“Oh, yeah, not in 53 minutes.”

“Raven-”

She cuts her off, plopping down onto the stairs to the rocket with defeat. “It's over, Clarke! You know, maybe if I still had Alie's code eating away at my brain, I could figure it out. I'm not smart enough myself.”

Clarke turns around, looking lost at what to say, and you all turn to Bellamy, knowing he’s the best at pep talks. He accepts the role and sits down beside Raven, his voice soft. “Raven, you can do this. How many times have you saved our asses before you ever even heard of Alie?”

“Too many to count.”

“You're damn right. We don't need Alie on the Ark, we need you.” Something about his words stop her falling tears, and she stares at him, clearly working through something in her head. “What?”

She jumps up very suddenly, pacing around your small group. “Alie was on the Ark, Alie was on the Ark! I was right there, so close to the kill switch, but she got away by transmitting herself to the ring.”

Emori nods, remembering. “Using the pod in the temple.”

“Yes! If she can do it, so can we.”

You look at her, not sure how she expects to get to the pod in the temple. “Raven, we'll never make it back to Polis on time, and the radios are dead.”

“We have something better than radios: the satellite tower.” She turns and points to Echo, Emori, and Harper. “You three, back in the cockpit, finish those restraints.”

They immediately follow her directions and climb back into the rocket, and she turns to you, Clarke, and Bellamy. “You three, helmets on. You're with me.”

She starts to walk away, but she remembers there's one last thing to do first. “Computer, resume launch sequence!”

“Resuming launch sequence.”

She grabs her helmet and the three of you grab yours, following her out of the lab and to the surface, her tablet still in hand, and she stops outside in the snow, pointing to the tower in the distance. “The tower's less than a mile away. All you have to do is plug this into the junction box at the base of the tower. Sat-Star-One is the name of the dish.”

She hands the tablet to Clarke, and you repeat back, “Sat-Star-One.”

“Everything is set. Once the tablet is connected, the dish will align itself with the Ark. The graphic will flash green, and that's how you know it's locked on. When it says 'send', you hit send, and the power up signal will turn on the lights, and that's it. Are there any questions?”

She finishes her instruction with a smile, leaving the three of you a little unsettled given the gravity of the situation. “Yeah, why are you smiling?”

“Because without comms, even with the power on, we still can't open the hangar bay door from inside the rocket.”

Bellamy shakes his head, his helmet shifting slightly from the movement. “Wait. How is that a good thing?”

Clarke connects the dots first. “She gets to take her space walk.”

Movement behind Raven pulls all of your eyes in that direction, watching as an orange suited figure climbs over the snow and runs towards you, struggling with a large machine part in their hands. You all run towards them, recognizing Murphy, who puts the machine down at your feet as you look around for the other man he was with. “Murphy, where's Monty?”

Murphy glances up at Bellamy, struggling to catch his breath. “He's in trouble, he had to expose his hands. He passed out. If we go back now, we can get to him.”

Bellamy looks over at you, expression worried and Murphy quips, “You can be impressed with me later, we gotta go.”

Raven picks up on the indecision in the group, turning to tell Bellamy, “Aligning the dish is a two person job at best, the twins can handle it. Harper will help me with the generator. Go!”

They start to run off, the ticking countdown making all of you too anxious and too eager. You call out to Bellamy before he gets too far, “Bellamy-”

He spins around, practically buzzing with nervous energy. “If this is one of those moments where you tell me to stop and think-”

You cut him off, “No, I was just gonna say, hurry. And that I love you.”

The words never fail to soften him, and ease some of his anxiety. “I love you more than the stars. See you in a few.”

You nod and he turns and runs into the woods, following Murphy, and you watch them until they’re out of sight as Raven hands Clarke a pack. “Monty's pack, everything's inside. It's gonna take you a good 10 minutes to get back from the tower and down to the cockpit. You have to leave that tower with 10 minutes on the clock or you'll both be left behind.”

Clarke tries to hide the anxiety in her voice, but fails as she checks her timer and sees 25 minutes on the countdown. “Ten minutes, we got this.”

You give Raven one last look, “Any last advice?”

“Yeah, run fast.”

And that’s all she has to say to push you and Clarke into gear. The two of you take off running towards the tower, ignoring the struggle of running in the snow in clunky suits. You can feel your earlier radiation poisoning wanting to slow you down, but you ignore it, determined to make it there and back in time. Your path takes you to the top of a small hill, the tower just at the bottom of it, and you lift your timer to check the time. “Eleven minutes.”

You and Clarke exchange a worried look before you scramble down the small hill to the panel of the tower, and you pull it open while Clarke grabs the tablet from the pack. You scan the names, looking for the right one, excited when you see it. “Sat-Star-One!”

You point to the right outlet and she plugs the cord in, both of you looking towards the tablet with excitement. But your excitement turns to frustration when the computer beeps, “Dish not aligned. Dish not aligned.”

“What did we do wrong?!”

“I don't know, radio for help!”

Clarke grabs the radio from the pack and frantically calls out, “Raven, please say that you can hear me. Something went wrong. We did everything you said, but it wouldn't-” Something on the door of the panel catches her eye and she reads outloud, “Manual operation? You've got to be kidding me.”

You both look up the tower, to the very top, where the dish is situated, before you exchange a look, knowing what you have to do. When you check the time on your countdown, it’s ten minutes on the dot. If both of you want to survive, you have to leave now. But if you leave now, you’ll all die in space, unable to get in the Ark. Clarke pushes the radio into your hand and starts to unplug the tablet, “Get back to the rocket, I’ll meet you there.”

“No, I’m not leaving you!”

“If you don’t, you’ll die!”

You grab her hand, holding her in place. “Mom’s vision had both of us dying. If this is it, then this is it. No avoiding it now. Stronger together.”

“Stronger together.” She repeats it back to you, accepting this, before she moves over to the ladder and starts to climb. Before you follow her, you lift the radio. “Bellamy...if you can hear me, don't wait. I love you, so so much.”

You run over to the ladder and start to climb up behind your twin, watching as you climb higher and higher. Each rung that brings you higher into the sky brings you a better glimpse of the approaching death wave, growing more terrifying the higher you get. Each time your arms move to pull you higher, you get a glimpse of the countdown, and when you’re halfway up, you whisper, “Oso gonplei ste odon.”

Our fight is over. Finally, the two of you reach the top, just as the timer on your wrist starts to beep, signaling that you’re out of time. Less than a minute later, you hear a sound tearing through the air, followed closely by the rocket, launching into the sky. You and Clarke both watch it, left behind, and you feel emotion start to grab you and choke you. Clarke reaches out and squeezes your hand, reminding you, “They’re not safe yet. Not until we get the power on.”

You nod and turn towards the control panel, watching as Clarke plugs in the tablet again, the computer repeating, “Dish not aligned. Dish not aligned.”

Clarke smacks the side of the panel, growing frustrated, “Come on, turn!”

She looks up at the dish, and you catch onto her line of thinking, already reaching towards the ladder that will take you up to the satellite. “Tell me where to go, Clarke!”

You climb up to the dish and start to pull it towards you, the satellite pointing into the sky. You hear it make a clicking sound, and you look down at Clarke, who calls out, “Good, now push it forward!”

You do as she says, pushing the satellite forward, pointing it towards the ground, until you hear another click. You look down for more direction, and she yells, “Pull it back again!”

You pull it back again, using all of your strength to get it as far back as possible, until you hear the third and final click. When you look down at Clarke, she screams, “Yes! Dish aligned!”

You lower yourself back down to her, just as she hits the send button. The two of you watch the green bar load, the message taking an agonizingly long time to send, until finally it goes through, a small little message popping up in the corner. “Sent!”

Both of you hug the best you can given the suits still on your body, pulling away when you realize the growing roar of something fast approaching. You look out towards the sky again, the death wave now horrifyingly close, and the two of you exchange a terrified look before Clarke yells, “Go, go, go!”

The two of you scramble down the ladder faster than you thought was humanly possible, running and stumbling through the snow, trying to escape Praimfaya, which seems to stay right at your backs. As you near the lab, the death wave roaring right behind you, Clarke stumbles and falls, the distinct sound of breaking glass heard as she hits the ground. You reach out for her and grab her, and at the same time she tries to jump to her feet, causing the two of you to collide in an awkward way, the broken glass of her helmet tearing into the left suit of your arm. You let out a cry of pain, the glass cutting into your skin, before both of you clamp a hand over your exposed areas and take off running again, nearly at the door to the lab.

The death wave seems to overtake you both as you reach the door, and Clarke pulls it open, stumbling inside. You run in after her, pulling the door closed, both of you slipping and sliding inside on wet, snowy shoes. Clarke stumbles to the table you were running numbers at less than two hours earlier, and she tugs off her helmet, instantly coughing up blood. Her face is covered in lesions, red and angry, and she stumbles once, before falling to the ground, unconscious. You run over to her and try to lift her, but the movement tugs on your arm, forcing you to cry out in pain. You check and make sure Clarke’s still breathing before you do anything else, and once you’re sure she’s still alive, you pull yourself from your suit, screaming as the suit takes some of your skin with it.

The cut on your arm definitely needs stitches, black blood dripping from the wound and running over the lesions on your arm, and you fumble around for a first aid kit, already feeling weak and sick. You sob with pain the entire time you stitch up your arm, doing the best you can as the stitches tug and pull on the fragile skin. Finally, once the wound is closed, the last bit of your energy spent, you lay back on the ground beside Clarke, lightheaded from radiation, blood loss, and pain. And as unconsciousness creeps up on you slowly, reaching out to drag you under, you look up at the ceiling, imagining the sky above, the Ark floating across it. Just as the darkness starts to take you, you whisper, “In this lifetime, and in the next.”

Somewhere in the sky, swimming amongst the stars, Bellamy Blake stands in the viewing window of the Ark, staring down at the Earth below, covered in a toxic death wave. Tears fall down his face, thinking of the love of his life, swallowed whole by radiation, and he chokes out, “Forever.”

next chapter

#the 100 #bellamy blake #bellamy blake x reader #the 100 rewrite #the 100 4x13

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