#Raphael honestly just wants to sit down and have tea with his family after a certain point.

[grey-eyed-menace]

Akatsuki & Leviathan/Belphegor, Subaru & Satan, and Akio/Yuuki & Belphegor/Beelzebub.

Akatsuki put a startling amount of trust in Belphegor after a certain point due to him having to put in actual effort at analyzing their interactions, and what little he could glean from her nightmares and dreams, due to her rampant distrust in him, and outright manipulated her growing feelings for him until the last possible second.

The moment he wraps his hands around her throat shatters a precarious sort of trust she's put back into the world, and it takes all of the following lessons to even remotely build that back up to a considerable level, and it's obvious that being alone with Belphegor in any context afterwards freaks her the fuck out.

It takes a very long road for either of them to be even remotely relaxed in each other's presence again and it's... honestly pretty fucking sad at the end of the day because Akatsuki ended up trusting Belphegor more then Mammon at a certain point.

[Do I follow this advice in most of my drawn up scenarios? No, no I do not, but it is the truth, and it needs to be said.]

There is a deep fondness, bordering on genuine love, and protective tendencies, but everyone around them is kinda hoping they can find a decent therapist before they sit down for that ultimate talk.

Akatsuki & Leviathan on the other hand just feed into each other's worst qualities when left to their own devices.

They're both deeply jealous and lack any real pride in themselves, Leviathan however still has an ego that is easily bruised, and he can easily act out on it due to his position and power.

Meanwhile Akatsuki grew up in an environment where showing anything resembling rage at being 'slighted' had to be bit down on and thrown aside or it would get her thrown out, or hurt, or just straight up killed depending on which relative she was with at the time.

Leviathan doesn't understand why she doesn't lash out, and Akatsuki still has largely human morals, thus can't understand how he can easily hurt people for something as trivial as a missed detail in an anime, and... it bleeds out. Pretty noticeably.

There's still obvious affection, and they're great friends after a while, but yeah, no, if they date, it'll just be one big loop of shit self-esteem/care and toxicity.

_____

Subaru & Satan are just a little too similar to ever truly work out, I don't really know how to explain it, but it's the sort of thing that just... it's kinda similar to Levi and Akatsuki's relationship but with a lot less overt feelings involved.

And there's also the fact that Subaru fucking hates Satan in the beginning because he reminds her of Kunugi Ichiru, a past abuser, in the absolute worst ways possible.

They do end up as friends down the line, definetly, but a relationship is a complete no go because of it.

_____

Akio/Yuuki & Beelzebub/Belphegor just straight up doesn't work unless you want all four to start leaning into their co-dependant relationships with each other, because it's pretty obvious, to me at least, that the demon twins will always pick each other over the MC, and my twins will always pick each other over anyone else in the Devildom without a second thought.

And the reason this doesn't work is because both parties understand this, and might accidentally encourage the unhealthy codependency between both sets of twins.

Yuuki and Akio can only just function without each other in the first two season to start with, it would only get worse if they were with Beel and Belphie because they'd encourage, however accidentally, the idea that they absolutely need each other to function.

_____

And then none of my OC's have the 'necessary alignment' for Lucifer, because he is pretty firmly a father figure in most of their lives.

Oh, and, uh, all of their relationships with Asmo are pretty underdeveloped, but the only ones with an actual shot at compatibility are Akatsuki and Akio.

...and every relationship with Solomon is platonic-ish, excluding one-sided feelings for Akatsuki on his part, (but he has that same caveat with Diana and Spade, so it's not really unique in the context of my universe), with Akio being more on the QPR side of things.

Akatsuki has way to many personal issues to ever entertain the idea of Diavolo as a romantic partner without mentally tearing herself apart.

Yuuki and Akio have some definite shit to work through in general before romance of any kind, (they share their chosen lover in most contexts), and need intensive therapy in general.

[Barbatos is AroAce in most of my stuff, even if it's never directly mentioned.

Simeon's been hopeless for countless millenia over his own feelings for Phenex, and it's looking to be that way on Phenex's end as well.

And then Marchosias and Mephistopheles has been QPR since several decades after the Fall, but no one likes bringing up Sias in the House of Lamentation because then they'd have to face the music about the other Fallen Demons.]

Oh, and, uh, Raphael just isn't interested in any of the main cast in my writing, he's on the Allo spectrum, definetly, just... everyone he has a solid connection with he firmly views in a familial light.

Same thing with Thirteen, to be honest.

Question for all MC out there. I'm curious.

Is there any character in obey me that you/your mc SHOULDN'T date? Like, there may be attraction and genuine love between you two, but the relationship just won't work?

I'll start. Val and Belphie post lesson 16 developed feelings for each other but didn't act on them. They both know how toxic they can be together, they enable worst qualities in each other. Maybe one day, when both are in a better place, but not know.

[astaroth1357]

Demigod MC Series: Hestia

This is another eternally virgin goddess, so we're doing another pseudo-demigod by adoption (like we did with Athena).

Demigod MC: Intro, Aphrodite, Hermes, Hades, Dionysus, Demeter, Athena, Hades Pt. 2, Poseidon, Ares, Hestia

Hestia is the goddess of the Hearth, Home, Architecture, Domesticity, Family, and the State. She's high up there (firstborn of Rhea and Cronus), but several factors have led to her falling into the background when compared to the other (flashier) Olympians. She swore to never marry, rejecting proposals from both Poseidon and Apollo, and is something of an antithesis to Aphrodite.

Lucifer

Honestly? He thought they were exactly what they were after. A weak human with no experience in the magical world what-so-ever.

Well… He was half-right.

On the surface, this is a pretty weak human. They don't have super flashy powers or a divine birth from the gods… but they do have a very protective adoptive mother.

The brothers had just settled in for their first dinner with the new human when the goddess herself strolled into their dining room, asked who was in charge, then dragged Lucifer away by the ear!

She's not even his mother, yet he felt the intense urge to apologize and put himself in his own room… Oh, the humiliation… at least she did the same to Diavolo…

The Prince was only able to calm her down by promising absolutely NO harm would come to her child… on their heads...

By the time the goddess finally let him go, Lucifer was about ready to shackle the MC to his wrist so nothing could touch them but he settled on keeping them with him like an assistant of sorts. They were in charge of helping him with the paperwork so he could keep an eye on them. 

What he didn’t expect was for them to be so… good at it? They could keep his offices clean, they managed his daily schedule, fixed up the House, and still have time to bring him tea and sweets every night!

They could even reign in his brothers somehow… They weren't strong or intimidating, but one or two mildly unhappy words out of them and everybody would be on their best behavior.

Was everyone positive they're only human...?

As much as he hated to admit, he may have a slight deep case of falling for the housekeeper… He would make a move, but well…

He has Beel to contend with first.

Mammon

Okay so, watching Lucifer get dragged out by the ear just like Raphael used to do to him was hilarious!!! The whole room got a good laugh! 🤣

Until Hestia glared at them and suddenly they all felt like they'd disappointed someone important….

And all that fuss over some dumb human??

So what if they made amazing food?

So what if they could clean the entire mansion in a day?

So what if they were the walking equivalent to a warm cup of cocoa on a winter's day??

So what if they were just the kindest, sweetest thing in this godforsaken hellscape and he would throw himself in front of a bus to keep them safe-

-Wait, when did that happen?!?

Seriously, Mammon's attachment to the MC came out of NOWHERE to him. One day, he was threatening to eat their soul and the next he's freaking out when they stub their toe!

He swears they have to have some kind of magic about them! A charm, or a spell, or… their lovable smile and warm, loving hugs...! 😊

Damnit!! They're too cute!! He needs them to go away but also never leave, thanks. 😒

In all seriousness, though their kind nature puts Mammon's tsundere self at a bit of a disadvantage, his protective instincts shoot through the roof whenever they're involved.

Naturally, that means his day is spent running them away from hungry lesser demons or shielding them from Beel and Lucifer's tug-of-war matches… He's a busy guy these days. 😖

Leviathan 

They're so… so… MOE!!!

That was his immediate thought when Mammon brought them home. He was expecting a defenseless human, but not one that could have stepped out of one of his slice-of-life manga!

To be honest, his instant thought was try and find a place to sit them on his shelves with the rest of the adorable characters he loves… 😅

And that was before they even opened their mouth! Five words into their introduction and he was ready to get their face on a t-shirt!!

Honestly, combine their natural cuteness with their household skills and they made for perfect waifu/husbando material… 

Not helped by the fact they found one of his maid/butler outfits while doing the laundry one day. Not only did they ask if they could wear it, they actually non-ironically liked it and started wearing it around the House!!

Oh he got cornered by Beel, Lucifer, and Mammon separately that day because they thought he was using them for fetish fuel… But it was their idea, he swears!!

I mean… He didn't discourage them or anything either but still…

If Beel hadn't claimed them on Day One, Levi might have eventually thrown his hat in the ring too... Oh well… he can pine from a distance… What else is new? 😔

Satan

He has a video of Hestia dragging Lucifer out of the dining room on his phone and it's one of his most treasured possessions now. 😌

He is perhaps the only person in the House who was not at all impressed with their little human.

So they could cook? So could he. So they can clean? That's not impressive. They could manage a household? Big deal, he's more or less been in charge of the same thing for centuries!

As far as he saw it, there was nothing the MC could do that he couldn't do as proficiently or even better. There was nothing remarkable about this human at all!

… except for one thing.

That maid/butler outfit of Levi's? The one they like to wear around?

It has cat accessories…

Either they don't notice or they don't mind it but they essentially walk around the House cleaning things with little kitty ears attached to their head and a bell on their collar…

Dammit… Why did Levi even buy that?!?

Satan ended up getting in trouble for enchanting their outfit to give them REAL ears and a tail "accidentally..." Lucifer strung him up by his toes, Beel gave him a black-eye, and Mammon still calls him a "perverted cat freak" but it was worth it, he says, worth it!!

Asmodeus 

Oh Beel…

Asmo saw Beel's feelings for the MC coming from a mile away. He didn't even need to confirm it with a sniff check, he had them scented by the end of their first night!

Lucifer, on the other hand, now that was a surprise... 😏

Ask him a century ago if Lucifer would ever consider a human lover, godly mother or no, and he'd have laughed! Yet here he is, giving gifts and sneaking whiffs of their adorable new housemate!

Of course, that's causing some commotion because they're pitted against each other, but Asmo finds it kind of cute honestly. 

Beel and Lucifer aren't fighting, not for real. The whole house knows Lucifer would win in a real brawl, but neither of them actually want to hurt the other… They're far too close for that.

So Beel tosses Lucifer around with kid gloves and Lucifer holds back considerably against Beel. It's pretty much just two brothers who love each other squabbling over the same toy… 🤭

Honestly, Lucifer might have bowed out by now and just let Beel have them but now his pride's on the line… thus an endless tussle between family and the sweet MC is in the middle, clueless to it all!

Tragic, is it not? But it certainly makes things more entertaining around here! (Good thing too since Beel beat him to the punch… If it's a fight against those two, he'll have to keep any of his own affairs with the MC under the radar... 😏)

Beelzebub 

He has claimed this one. Full stop.

For a bit of perspective: when Barbatos needs cooking tips, he calls Hestia. Hestia, the Divine Master of All Things Cooking. Hestia, the goddess who raised this MC… 

Needless to say if they have any magic at all, it's in the kitchen.

If food is the way to Beel's heart, this MC has claimed his heart, soul, and probably all of his vital organs. Their food is astounding!! Always perfect every time and so good it brings him to tears!

It started the night of that first dinner, prepared by MC. He was too busy scarfing down the table to even notice a goddess showed up and then he proposed to the MC with their own pig roast by meal's end!

They said no to marriage, but an instant pact agreement suited him just fine.

Beel didn't waste a single moment before he started treating them like a potential mate, territorial aggression and all, but there was a bit of a catch… He kept the MC totally oblivious to it.

Surprisingly, Beel's can turn the "They're MINE" part of his brain on and off pretty well. He's nothing but sweet and cuddly to the MC when they're around and even with his brothers!... as long as they don't try anything.

The moment he caught whiff that Lucifer might be pursuing them too, it was on. Suddenly the two brothers who almost never fight were in competition against each other! But of course, both have an unspoken rule to never do so in front of MC.

And now poor MC believes it's common for demons to "play wrestle" like puppies and hugs are traditionally supposed to be so hard they could snap spines… 

And it doesn’t look like they'll be backing down any time soon… Oh dear...

Belphegor 

You know what? For once, everything goes exactly to plan for Belphie!

No really, this MC has no hidden powers, no magic horses, not even Demon Nip. They are a helpless, trusting little human who just wants to help their big teddy bear get his twin back!

So, you know how it goes. The charm, the lies, the treachery and all of that. He even gets to kill them!! Oh, happy days!! 😁

Come to think of it, they did smell an awful lot like Beel… But who cares, as long as Lucifer suffers right?? And this whole "living together in harmony" crap fails, right?!

Wrong. 

Beel went ballistic. Lucifer did too, but Beel was what really hurt…

Belphie can safely say that in all of his life, Beel has never physically attacked him. Not once, or at least, not with intent to kill… 

But when the sixthborn's fist went crashing through the wall right by his ear that day, he knew his brother's first instinct was to aim for his head… and his second was to miss, as he still loved him, but only by just a little.

What the hell did he just do??

Thank their father for Barbatos and all the funky time stuff he can do because bringing the MC "back" snapped his angry brothers right out of it. 

Things should have been smoothed over at that point but as everyone was finally settling down for tea, Hestia made another appearance in the House… this time carrying a butcher's knife!

Time fix or no, Diavolo had promised her no harm would come to MC and at least one continuity of them DIED… so punishment was now on Lucifer and the Demon Prince himself!

Belphie, in a rare case of guilt and an expression of brotherly love, offered to take their place since it WAS kind of all his fault. His gesture softened the Goddess of Family juuust enough to lighten his sentence from execution to hard labor.

And thus, the MC had their own housekeeping assistant for a whole year, complete with bitter reluctance and a matching maid outfit! Cat-theme and all!!

He's sending nightmares to anybody who laughs… guaranteed. 😒

[heyheydidjaknow]

I finished it, finally! Yee fucking haw! It’s not perfect, but I’m not feeling terrible about it, and the next one is going to be fun. Unless something happens, the next chapter should come up on Sunday as planned. Knowing me, it won’t, but I wanna hope. As always, the table of contents and the previous chapter is at the bottom, and a full list of the shit I’ve published is at the bottom of the table of contents. I’ll do a proper proofread tomorrow. Right now, Grammarly and Kami are carrying the team, so if there’s a mistake, take it up with them.

Chapter 14

“I trust you won’t be creepy.”

“I’m thankful.” Yoshi runs his thumb along the rim of his cup slowly. “You have little faith in me, as I understand it.”

You try not to be disrespectful. “Well, things in your life could’ve gone better, right?”

He seems to consider this for a moment. “I suppose so.” He takes a slow drink. “Mistakes from my youth have led to many hardships. Still, though the road has been a long and strenuous one, I would not want to change my past.”

Your untouched drink is cradled in your hands. “You don’t regret anything?”

“It is a foolish and maddening thing, longing for a life unobtainable to you.” He closes his eyes, your own scanning the walls for the photograph you know is in some nook or cranny. “Besides, if things hadn’t happened the way they did, I wouldn’t have my sons.”

You can understand, intellectually, he does not mean to be—and likely is not— as arrogant as you perceive him. Still, something about the way he sits, the way he speaks, even how he looks at you now makes you feel painfully inferior, as if you reacting the way you are makes you somehow beneath him in more than a literal sense.

You decide against arguing the point, eyes flickering from the shrine back to the man in front of you. “I guess that’s true.” You know you are not going to drink any of what he has offered until you have to. “And you’ve always thought like that?”

He nods. “It was what I was taught.”

Nodding, you look back down at your cup, a deafening stillness settling between you two. ‘He convinces me to come here,’ you grumble silently, ‘and all I get for it is a lecture and an awkward silence.’ You look back up at him, setting the clay vessel on the ground and pulling your knees to your chest. ‘I could be doing something else, like fixing my shirt or something.’

“Speaking of them,” he continues, “Donatello tells me you have been experiencing night terrors.”

‘Snitch. Did he tell me he told him?’ “You don’t?”

His eyebrows rise. “Sorry?”

“We have the same trauma,” you explain simply. “Both our families died in fires we caused. Think that counts.”

He does not even flinch. “I’ve never thought of it that way.” He smiles softly. You want to punch him in the face. “I suppose so, yes.”

“You seem pretty calm about it.”

He chuckles at your expression. “I’ve had fifteen years to come to terms with my loss,” he takes another drink. “And,” he jokes, “I was often simply too exhausted to have nightmares back when the wound was fresh; caring for four young boys is tiring, you understand.”

“Right.” You crisscross your legs in front of you. “Yeah, the makes sense.”

“Having said that,” he continues, voice lowering, “I can’t imagine going through what I did at your age.” He sighs. “If something like that happened to one of my boys at this age, I can’t honestly say how they would cope.”

‘Poorly. I’d guess they’d cope poorly.’

“I understand that you and I have differences in ideals and morals.”

“You could say that.” Your mouth stretches into a wry smile. “I honestly only started hangin’ with and helpin’ y’all as a way to make up for my manslaughter. With this exception, I live by the adage, ‘Not my circus, not my monkeys.’”

“As I said,” he covers his mouth to hide his amusement, “we differ in that respect. I take it that’s why, when Donatello explained the situation—” you break eye contact—“he was unable to explain in any sort of detail what they were about.”

“Not his circus not his monkeys. ‘Sides,” you shrug, “he was already being really caring and understanding, and I was already sobbing my eyes out, which I’m sure he already told you, so.”

You stare down at your tea. “Are you going to elaborate?”

“Not if I don’t have to, no.” Your face heats up.

“Do you want my help?”

‘I hate this,’ you squirm. “Honestly, I wouldn’t be here if Donnie hadn’t asked me to.”

“For someone who believes in leaving people to their own devices,” he notes, “you seem to value the requests of my son a great deal.”

Your knees are back up to your chest. “He’s important to me. He’s been there for me. It’s the least I can do.”

He takes a beat to gather his thoughts. You brace yourself for a lecture.

“You care for him, then.”

You nod once, treading carefully.

“Romantically?”

You still do not look at him directly, staring instead at the gorgeous screen door. “I dunno.” Your fingernails scratch at the surface. “I’m not exactly in my right mind, you understand.”

“I can’t say I do.” A pause as he takes another drink. “Then again, I’ve only felt for one woman all my life.”

“Look at that,” you try to joke. “Another difference between us.”

“Do you mind letting me in, then?”

“A little,” you admit, “but I will since there isn’t really a point to being here if I don’t.”

“That’s the spirit.” You can hear his smile.

You set the cup down again, glancing up at him before fiddling with the laces on your shoe. “People under stress and without anywhere else to turn tend to latch onto the first people they relate to,” you explain, practicing your knot tying with fumbling fingers; there is no harm in practicing your dexterity. “He was the first guy I met after I died, got kidnapped, and almost got killed by a giant vine creature. I like him,” you clarify quickly, “I really do, but it’s hardly fair to pursue that sort of relationship, especially considering everything going on with the Kraang and Shredder.” Your eyes go out of focus. “We get along great,” you mumble. “He’s sweet, kind, generous, and empathetic. He deserves to make sense of his feeling properly without me muddying things up with my possibly trauma-induced attachment.”

“So,” he clarifies, “it is not that you aren’t in love with him, but, instead, you’re worried for his sake?”

Your face goes scarlet as you choke on your saliva. “T-that’s a bit—uh—extreme, isn’t it?” You rub the back of your burning neck. “I’m not even sixteen, Yoshi. You don’t understand love properly at sixteen!”

“I fell for my wife at thirteen,” he smiles. “It’s certainly not impossible.”

“That’s—look,” you protest, “that is entirely besides the point. The point,” you state, “is that is completely irresponsible for me to pursue a relationship with your son. Frankly, I’m surprised you don’t agree.”

“He cares for you. You know that. Who am I to decide who he does and does not pursue, especially when that person makes him happy?” He reaches for a worn kettle sitting between you two on a table, pouring its contents back into his teacup—you remember Leo telling you that it is technically called a yunomi. “I find love typically does no harm so long as it does not consume you. Moderation is key.”

You look up at him. “So, you don’t have any reservations about it?”

He takes another drink. “I wouldn’t say that. He is my son, after all. In truth,” he admits, “I was more concerned that my sons would never experience what I did than anything. Given the circumstances of our existence, I’m sure you can understand my wish to give them a relatively normal, happy life.”

You sigh. “I guess, yeah.” You adjust your blanket again. ‘Seems counterintuitive, teaching them the art of murder, but I guess that’s his normal.’ “That’s just a generally good parenting thing though, right? I’d hope you’d want that even if you weren’t a giant rat and they weren’t anthropomorphic turtles.”  

A parent. He is talking to you like one might speak to their kid.

“I suppose so,” he nods. “It’s been difficult, but we’ve certainly come a long way over the years.”

The screeching of tires pierces the still air, the chattering of his four sons bouncing off the concrete walls.

You strain to hear what they are saying. “I never noticed that there was an echo in here. It’s less noticeable than in the tunnel.”

“That’s by design,” he explains. “I’ve made something of an effort to dampen it.”

“Oh, that’s cool.” You set the yunomi on the table. You sigh, holding your breath and downing your now gross, cool tea in three quick gulps. “I hate to cut this short,” you lie, wiping your mouth with your sleeve and tottering to your feet, “but I’ve gotta check to make sure everything went smoothly on their mission and adjust my timetable accordingly.”

He nods, deciding not to point your tell out. “I won’t keep you, then. Would you like to borrow my cane?”

This is not the first time he has offered. You, of course, refuse.

“Oh well. I thought I’d offer.” He sets his cup down, staying seated. “It has been pleasant talking with you, Y/N.”

“Likewise, Mr. Hamato.” You nod once in acknowledgment, hopping over to the door and slipping out into the hallway.

Your stomach churns at the stench coming from the lab—you can smell the gasoline. You lean against the wall, making a pointed effort not to eavesdrop and rapping your knuckles against the door. Their voices immediately lower to hisses and someone drags the door open.

“Hey,” Mikey beams. “We were just talking about you. Need somethin’?”

“Just is an over-exaggeration.” There is a considerable amount of protest as Donnie pulls him away from the door with an uncomfortable edge to his voice. “P-please, come in.”

A beaten DIY van sits pathetically on the subway track, looking not dissimilar to a burnt, crushed soda can from where you stand. The once hot pink graffiti has most certainly seen better days, and you squirm at the thought of the sound it must have made if you understand the situation properly. Raphael, who you glance at out of the corner of your eye, looks similarly beat up. Of course, you are not going to say anything because you value your life.

You whistle, smiling incredulously. “So,” you try not to laugh, “I take it you took on the cucaracha.”

“Made it my bitch is what I did,” boasts Raphael. “Shot it with a laser.”

“Cool, cool.” You chuckle at his excitement. “You take care of the egg?”

Is there a better sight than watching the light in someone’s soul die? You would hesitantly say no. “The what?”

“Right outside the building,” you elaborate. “On the side of the road. Looks like a horrifying imitation of an orbee?’

He takes a slow, deep breath, holds it, exhales. “I’ll be right back,” he says calmly, and sprints out of the lair.

Michelangelo laughs. “Were you being serious or are you messing with him?”

“Serious.” You readjust the blanket, trying to subtly figure out how to breathe without being assaulted by the mechanical smell. “I won’t joke about that sort of thing. It’s cruel.”

He hesitates. “… speaking of, are you alright? I didn’t get to ask before.”

The other two are quietly watching the interaction with an odd amount of intensity.

You shrug. “I guess. Probably.”

“Alright,” he nods. “Just lemme know if you need to talk, alright? Donnie’s no—ow!”

“Don’t talk bad about people in front of them,” Leonardo criticizes. “It’s rude.”

“You called him special, like, four hours ago!”

“The word of the day is hypocrisy.” Donatello puts his hand down.

“Hypocrisy’s right” You rub Mikey’s shell reassuringly. “To be fair, though, Leo could honestly probably just dodge it anyway.”

He leans into it. “I guess,” he grumbles, shooting a look at Donatello. “Favoritism.”

“It’s strategic favoritism,” the tallest brother corrects. “It’s to encourage parti pris.”

“Cronyism,” you tease, grinning. “You mean cronyism.”

“Hey, I’m plenty qualified!”.  

You stifle a giggle as his face reddens, looking back over at the battered vehicle, raising an eyebrow.

“That was a team effort.”

“Yeah, okay, Hamato.” You blow a strand out of your face. “How long do you think it’ll take to fix?”

“Half a week? Maybe a bit less.” He looks back at it ruefully. “The spy roach completely jacked it.”

“Clearly.” You remove your hand, Mikey seemingly thoroughly comforted. “Then mind if I borrow a needle and thread so I can fix my jacket? I have school tomorrow.”

“Do you have the dexterity for that?” Leo crosses his arms across his chest absentmindedly.

“If I can hold a pencil,” you reason, “I can do basic stitching. ‘Sides, it’s only gotta hold until I get home.”

“I didn’t know you sewed.”

“I don’t. That’s why I’m asking now.”

Donatello pipes up again. “I really don’t mind—”

“Dude,” you reason, “you have to fix a whole ass van. I’ll manage.”

He pulls his phone from his pocket. “It’s a quarter to twelve. You won’t finish before midnight.”

“Then sucks to be me.” You shrug. “I’ll fix it here and walk home.”

He looks at you with a surprising amount of incredulousness. “It’s New York City.”

“You go out at night all the time,” you protest.

“I can carry you—”

Immediate panic. “Nah, I’m good!” You try to sound confident. “I walk home all the time, remember?”

“Not at midnight.”

“What’s a couple hours difference?” You would rather get attacked or kidnapped than fly over buildings again.

“A hundred-twenty minutes,” he states. “You know that crime is statistically more likely to happen at night, right?”

“That tracks. What’s different?”

“Violent crime peaks at midnight.”

Mikey butts in. “Why can’t she just go in the blanket? It covers enough.”

Donatello rolls his eyes. “Mikey,” he sighs, “she’s a teenage girl walking around with her torso covered by a single conspicuous quilt. Let’s use our heads here.”

It takes him a minute. “So you’re worried about her getting, like, attacked?”

“… were you paying attention to any of the conversation? Or the lesson we just learned?”

“Dude,” he protests, “when do I ever?”

“What, you mean the one where y’all learned to face your fears or the one where talking about people in front of them is rude?”

The bitter edge to your words is not lost on him. “Look,” he reasons with you, “I-I’m not saying you’re incapable of taking care of yourself—”

“You are, but that’s not the point.”

“Shut up, Mikey.” You are surprised he did not punch him, though, admittedly, you can hardly argue the point. “What I mean is that if you put yourself in harm’s way, you’re going to get hurt.” He nods at Leo. “He’s a really experienced fighter and even he gets overwhelmed if he goes out of his way to do something reckless and dangerous like Karai.” He spits out her name like it is poisonous.

“Since when have you had a thing against Karai?”

The eldest brother sighs. “I’m never living that down, am I?”

“Unimportant, and nope. Point is,” he continues, fingers twitching at his sides, “it doesn’t make sense to tempt fate.”

You open your mouth to argue. You close it again. He has an extremely valid point all things considered, especially considering everything that has been happening, and although you are completely certain about your stance on him carrying you home, you would be lying if you said the idea of stumbling home without your walker or shirt sounds very appealing.

“Then what exactly are you suggesting?”

He looks off. “I’m suggesting she stays the night, Leo.”

Mikey blinks. “What, in your room or on the couch?”

“It would be up to her.”

That works for you. “Your home. You pick. Where do you keep your sewing supplies?” You slip out of the circle the four of you have formed.

“On top of the bookshelf,” he points. “Behind the cardboard box.”

You nod, hopping over.

Mikey offers his two cents. “It makes more sense for you two to share a room. It’s kinda cold in the front room, and you guys’ll probably end up going to bed at around the same time anyways. She also has your blanket.”

You stand on your toes, fingertips brushing against a plastic container.

“That’s a fair point.” You catch it before it cracks open on the ground. “Training starts pretty early, so she should have time to grab her things before school.”

“See? Foolproof plan.”

“Would Master Splinter approve?”

“Leo,” you call over your shoulder, “he’s slept over at my house twice already. I really doubt he cares.”

“But we don’t know.”

“Then you can go ask him.” You turn around. “Where’s the jacket?”

“In the cardboard box.” Donnie starts towards the train wreck on the tracks.

You pull it down, taking your shirt and jacket and sitting down, crossing your bad leg under the one you can use, despite the nausea. ‘Exposure therapy.’ “Thanks.”

“No problem.”

You feel a tap on your shoulder. You glance up at Mikey, who crouches down next to you as Leo waves to his brothers and leaves. “You need anything?”

He shakes his head. “Just wanted to hang out with you is all,” he shrugs. “You didn’t go after Donnie.”

“I didn’t,” you nod in agreement.

“Why?”

“Because car.” You unlatch the box, carefully digging around inside for some pins. “That, and the smell is bad enough from over here.”

He crosses his legs in front of him. “That’s fair.” He taps his foot absentmindedly. “You think he knows?”

“I thought I made it pretty damn clear,” you shrug, “but it’s Donnie, so I wouldn’t bet on it.”

He grins at that. “Then do you wanna hang out while you work on that out front? He isn’t exactly talkative when he gets in the zone.”

You shake your head. “If I do, I won’t get much done,” you admit. You unwind a long portion of the thread, snapping it apart. “Besides, the only way to get over a fear is to face it head-on.”

“Alright.” He hops to his feet. “Thought I’d ask. Have fun.”

”Bet,” you mumble through a bit tongue, shaky fingers making threading the needle almost impossible. “You too.”

“See ya.” He waves, running out of the lab.

You let out a breath, picking a piece of loose wire off of a table and creating a poor imitation of a threader. While you genuinely enjoy talking with Michelangelo, you have some things to think over.

Clumsy fingers start on a running stitch. If your timetable still holds true—which, surprisingly enough, it has thus far—the episode after next’s plot will take place in about three weeks. Your cast is coming off in two. You do not know where and when The Kraang are coming through their portal, or if there is any way for you guys to know, but seeing as you are skipping the episode where the turtles get stuck in a labyrinth under the assumption that, without Baxter being bullied by the Shredder and his goons, he has no reason to construct it, you would tentatively estimate the next episode will happen in about a week. You are still fairly sure that Stockman will not get involved with the Shredder without his input until Oroku finally opens his eyes to the dangers and powers of the Kraang, which should happen around the same time as the next episode.

Your eyes glaze over as you get into the groove of it. ‘The next episode is also when the guys get on Karai’s shit list because they betray her, and, if that happens, the episode where the Shredder starts getting involved with the Kraang and comes to appreciate their resources." You prick your finger. ‘It wouldn’t be long after that before Saki gets the idea to create a mutant army, and with Baxter already somewhat on the villainous map, our best chance to make sure he doesn’t end up under his employment is to…’

You wipe the sticky liquid on your jeans, careful of the bandages on your back. ‘It’s not a guarantee that he even knows Baxter exists.’ Your eyebrows furrow in concentration as you try to keep the stitches separated at equal distances. ‘Hell, it’s not a guarantee he’s even alive. Still, it’s better to air on the side of caution and not think about how you’ll have to do it until the time comes.’

You let out a soft sigh. “I’ll buy a gun, when that happens,” you murmur to yourself. “Just want more time where bodily harm is all I have to deal with is all.”

 --

 You slide your poorly stitched jacket over your shoulders under the blanket, pulling your sleeves into place and zipping it up. After folding the blanket up and draping it over your arm, you pull yourself to your feet, hopping over to Donatello and his death trap as he sat down, looking over his work. “How’re the repairs comin’?”

The two of you have not spoken for the three hours it took you to repair the jacket, and significantly more progress has been made on his end than yours. At the very least, the generally rectangular frame was pounded back into submission.

He looks over at you, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand and stifling a yawn. “Fine,” he sighs, looking back at the hulking mass of metal as you lower yourself down next to him. “It won’t blow up or anything if it’s driven, but it still needs another day’s worth of work to get it back to where it was before.” You nod along as he goes into more intimate detail, not understanding half of it, but happy to just listen to him talk resentfully about the whole process that you can tell he genuinely does not mind.

“Sounds like a time.” You rest your head on your good knee. “And you’re not gonna fix the graffiti?”

“It rubs off,” he shrugs. “Besides, it’s not exactly important to the design.”

Your head bends in a subtle nod, cheek numb from the pressure of your knee. “Are you going to sleep today?”

He shrugs. “Maybe? It wouldn’t be a bad idea.” His legs are almost crisscrossed in front of him, and he leans his weight back on his skinny, muscular arms. “I honestly don’t want to leave it alone, though. It would be weird to just leave it unfinished.

“Hardly, but alright.” You sit up for a moment, handing him back his quilt. “Thanks for giving me something to cover myself up with, and for not ditching me on a roof, and patching me up, and—I owe you, is what I’m getting at.”

He smiles tiredly. “Don’t worry about it, really,” he reassures you, his face flushing and muscles relaxing slightly. “You’ve made it up plenty.”

“I disagree. I’ve never saved your life.” You trace the fading lines on your cast his brother had left.

“I don’t think a ton of people would literally kill someone for me and my family,” he argues. “That’s pretty awesome, right?”

‘Not sure how I feel about framing murder as a positive thing.’ You do not say anything, looking back at his work.

He sighs. “You should go to bed,” he advises practically. “It’s getting late.”

“Never stopped you.” You straighten your legs. “I’ll go if you come with.”

“Tempting,” he teases with a sudden burst of confidence, hoping to his feet and outstretching his arm to help you up, “but what’s in it for me?”

Your face lights up as your face goes red at his borderline roguishness, taking his arm pulling yourself up. “For as much shit as you’re going to get for it,” you promise, pecking where his nose would be with an almost kittenish smile, “I’ll get up extra early, make everyone breakfast, and go topside for coffee.”

His face almost turns the shade of a human blush, forwardness gone in an instant. “C-can’t,” he stutters, clearly flustered. “When I was eleven, I got addicted to it and I’m not allowed to have any anymore.”

“Relatable,” you giggle. You blow the hair out of your face, comfortable as he helps you walk towards the door, the air between you two charged with electricity. “Is that for all caffeine or just coffee?”

He opens it for the two of you, ever the gentleman with the quilt over his shoulder. “Tea’s fine. Don’t bring tea down, though,” he quickly clarifies. “Leo’ll have a very inconspicuous fit.”

You blink curiously, looking up at him as he pulls you along. “Why?”

“It’s the one food thing he’s particular about,” he shrugs, not bothering to hide his gooey smile as you use his upper arm for support. “Couldn’t tell you why.”

“Are you particular about any foodstuff?”

“Not really?” He helps you up a few steps. “I’m not Mikey, but I don’t think I’m that picky about that sort of thing.”

“That’s fair.”

You do not let go of his arm to use the wall. You do not even think to if Donnie is reading your body language correctly. His smile widens as he opens the door for you.

You give a nod as thanks, lowering down onto the foot of his relatively narrow bed. “Alright,” you clap your hands together quietly as he sits next to you. “How do you wanna do this?”

You are sitting on his bed, willing, with no pretense other than sleeping getter. He is currently on cloud nine.

You look back at the frame. ”Too narrow for us to lay side by side,” you note. “You sleep on your front, meaning you will likely take up most of the room." You look between him and the bed, trying to imagine a position that would work. “You could lay on top of me, I guess, but then your legs would hang off the end.”

“I can sleep on my side,” he offers hurriedly. “If that makes things easier, I mean.”

“You sure?” Your fingers fumble with your shoelaces.

He nods eagerly. “S-so long as you still don’t mind being close to me, I mean. The bed’s still kinda narrow.”

You roll your eyes, smiling. “We’ve slept together before,” you reason. “If you wanted to pull anything, you would’ve the other two times.”

He glances off, face still red. “Y-yeah,” he rubs the back of his neck bashfully. “That makes sense.”

You gesture to the bed. “Then,” you nod once, “so long as you’re comfortable, you lay down. I’ll work from there.”

He tentatively lays himself down, facing the wall, tensing ever so slightly as you lay behind him, legs curling up under his thighs.

You lay your arm under your head as a pillow, the other pulling the blanket over the two of you. “This work,” you whisper, closing your eyes.

“Mhm,” he hums, covering his face with his hands. “We closed the door, right?”

You look back over. “Yup.”

“Locked it?”

“Seems so.”

He relaxes a bit. “Alright,” he nods, quietly reveling in the way your fingers, again, traced the indentations in his shell like the first night.

‘When I wake up tomorrow,’ he realizes, ‘she’ll be right there. Right behind me, in my bed. By choice.’ He smiles behind his fingers. ‘When we get older, maybe we could have our own place. Or our own room, more accurately, where she just lives with us. Imagine her moving in. If—no, when,’ he corrects himself, ‘we defeat The Shredder, if I ever get the nerve, I’ll ask her.’ He reaches his leg back, entangling it with yours carefully. ‘Would we have to get married first? No, you move in before you get married, right? I should’ve paid more attention during those movie marathons.’ He closes his eyes as you drift off, focusing on this train of thought. ‘How long do you need to be in a relationship before you get married? How would we get married, even? Legally, that would be impossible, right? I can’t go to a courthouse. And if we had a child—practically speaking, of course—would they live with us or go to a public school? We could give them a good education, I’m sure, but—’

You shift in your sleep, absently laying your arm over his side and pulling him closer.

He exhales, allowing himself to relax back into you. ‘Not tonight.’ He rests his hand on top of yours. ‘It’s too late, too soon.’ His thumb runs along the back of your hand, letting himself drift off in your arms.

‘It’ll be okay. We’ll last long enough to take it slow.’

Table of Contents

Chapter 13

Chapter 15

[sylvain-writes]

Guarded Hearts and Safe Houses (Leonardo x Reader) Chapter 3/9

Rated: T Gender Neutral Reader, canon typical violence/injury, light angst, strangers to lovers, supportive family for @melodiousmelodrama

You wake just as the sun comes up and in truth you’ve barely gotten any sleep at all. In the living room, Donnie, Mikey, and Raph snore soundly. Your father putters around the kitchen, making coffee and whipping up eggs for quiche.

“I imagine they’ll be hungry. It’s got protein and I’m sure reptiles eat eggs. They are reptiles, aren’t they?” Your father rambles when he’s nervous. Of course, a house full of strangers - mutant strangers - would have him on edge. “Gram will be up in an hour or so to watch the news and take her meds. Do you think… Well, no they’re too big to hide, aren’t they?”

“Dad…” you smile sweetly at his concerns, “it’s going to be OK.” Bitterly, you remember Leo’s reluctance to accept your family’s help. How he acted like it was an inconvenience to him. You remember the eager way he pulled his hand away from yours. “Have you seen Leo? I can ask him when they plan to ship out.” You doubt he’d want to ‘accept charity’ or ‘overstay his welcome’ or ‘drum up more debt,’ or whatever Leo is calling it this morning.

Your Dad points with the egg soaked whisk, indicating the rooftop as he catches drips with his bowl. “I checked on him. He’s a troubled young man.”

You roll your eyes and start a kettle of tea for yourself. But when you open the cabinet for a mug, you take down a pair of travel mugs without much of a thought. 

Looking down at the mugs, you sigh knowing you’ll bring tea for Leo in spite of the pinched feeling in your chest. Once both mugs are prepared and sealed, you take your jacket off the hook and head for the window.

"The stairwell works, you know," Father says as you reach for the window latch.

You give you father a shrug and accept the cups of tea he passes through the window to you on the fire escape. "Thanks."

"Don't be too hard on him," your father says, somehow reading your thoughts. "I think he's punishing himself up there, blaming himself for what happened to his brothers."

"Did Mikey wake up yet?" you ask with concern.

You're relieved by your father's nod. "Mom checked him out before he fell asleep again. They're all going to be fine. Could use some more rest though."

Father closes the window behind you and you make the climb up the metal stairs to the roof.

You find Leo slowly carrying out a series of movements. You assume it's a form of Tai Chi or Yoga. Careful not to disturb him, you take a seat by the ladder and allow yourself to be lured by the strength of his forms.

Leo turns, pulling his fists to his hips as he takes a wide stance. Facing you, he comes to a stop, expels a measured breath, and meets your gaze. "I know why you're here.”

"You do?"

Another slow breath. "I mapped a route,” he says, his tone devoid of emotion. “If we leave before the top of the hour, we'll have enough cover to make it to the sewers."

"I'm not here to kick you out. I brought tea.” You gesture to the mugs sitting beside you and cross your arms over your chest. “And Father's making breakfast. You'd be rude to leave now."

Leo seems invulnerable to your attempts at humor. "We can't impose ourselves on you any longer."

How can he think your family is trying to push them out, when all they’ve done is ask them to stay, to recover. "You're not an imposition. Don't you get that? Your brothers are hurt, Leo. You're hurt."

Leo walks over, and reluctantly takes the mug when it’s offered. "We heal quickly," he assures you, blowing carefully over the tea before taking a sip. His stubbornness, however, doesn’t blind you to his lingering injuries.

"You were dropping your arm while you did your karate thing. The left side was always a bit slower than your right. Tell me that was deliberate."

Leo rolls his shoulder. Though he manages to suppress a wince, his eyes go tight at the corners. "It's nothing."

"It'll matter in a fight."

"I'll be back to rights by nightfall. Krang won't attack during the light of day. Not yet, at least."

"So that settles it.” You smile. You’ve won. “Wait til nightfall."

Inside, everyone was seated around the table for breakfast. Everyone.

You pulled up short, seeing Gram's chair at the head of the table. "Gram, you're… in the kitchen..."

Grandmother purses her lips. "I got hungry dear and I could smell your father overcooking the quiche again."

You scan the room, wondering what her reaction had been to the mutants. "So you came out to help and..."

"And found there was no need.” She gave a light chuckle. “Donatello had it under control. Finally got the oven calibrated. And that Raphael,” she pet his arm and he seemed to melt under her attention, “such wonderful knife skills."

"What about Mikey?"

"Oh,” she says, smiling affectionately, “he's eaten half the donuts in the box."

Mikey scowls, powdered sugar dusting his lips and fingertips. "Hey, lay off. It's all part of the healing process. OK?” He stuffs another donut hole into his mouth, muffling his voice. “I was gravely injured, dudes. I need proper sustenance to repair the damage."

Raph snorts as crumbs fall into Mikey’s lap. "Yeah, too bad them donuts ain't cure brain damage."

"Uh huh," Donatello smirks at both of his younger brothers and Raph kicks him under the table.

“You’re one t’ talk, brainiac .” It’s a curious exchange. Raphael both poking fun of and defending Mikey nearly in the same breath.

Leo sighs at your side before addressing his brothers. "Get your strength up, guys. Help out where you can.” To your grandmother and father, Leo gives a small bow. “We thank you for your hospitality. You've been gracious hosts and your medical assistance has been invaluable. I'm sorry to impose ourselves upon your family for any longer than truly necessary, but-"

"But nothin," Raph says, swallowing hard to clear a mouthful of pancakes. You see Gram sneaking more turkey bacon onto the big guy's plate. "They said we could stay. Donnie called Splinter. It's all good, bro. Sit. Eat. Chill."

Mindful of his injuries, but going along with his brother’s playful spirit, you nudge Leo with an elbow. "Yeah, bro. Chill.” You know Splinter’s approval goes a long way, but you think seeing his brothers well and comfortable around your family has allowed Leo to breathe easier. He doesn’t resist when you push him toward an empty chair.

The rest of the day goes by better than you could have imagined. Who knew they guys were as obsessed with retro gaming as your cousins?

Mikey isn't feeling well enough to pick up a controller, but he's quick to offer insights and cheat codes for the game.

Leo spends most of the time fussing over his younger brothers. He makes sure there are snacks and water, breaks from screen time, and injury checks. It seems like Mikey passing up his turns in video games is really out of character for the guy. Leo watches him closer than the rest.

The concern Leo shows for his brothers niggles at your heart. It pushes aside the parts of him that annoy you to make room for growing respect. Affection for the man sneaks up on you, warming your chest before you realize it’s there.

Leo stands beside the TV, waving a tea towel in front of his brother’s faces, announcing it's time for dinner. You almost want to laugh at the scene. His brothers sprawled over the living room fighting over controllers and bags of pretzels, while he clucks at them like a mother hen.

But then something about it kind of clicks. You get it. You understand why he's stern and focused. He's taken it upon himself to be the responsible one. And his brothers are able to goof off, able to have these hours of fun, because of that.

"We're heading out after we eat,” Leo says as Donnie turns off the TV. Leo skips over you as he takes turns looking all of his brothers in the eye. "Get this place cleaned up."

Dinner is full of laughing and teasing, carried over from the evening’s gaming. You think you even spot a smile on Leo's face once or twice.

You pass him the basket of bread and catch his eye. You're grateful for the moment he spends looking at you, still smiling at his brothers’ warm-heartedly debate with Gran on whether or not milk belongs in tea.

It’s sad to see them go, but you don’t expect the guys to return so soon.

Donatello is the one at the window, not four hours later.

Just when you were getting water, about to turn in for bed, you hear a knock on the window. You jump at the sound. The glass in your hand slips into the sink.

Donnie keeps to the shadows on the fire escape. The news he brings is devastating. His eyes don’t meet yours when he speaks and his tone of voice sounds discordantly flat compared to the news he brings, but you know he’s telling the truth. There’s no way anyone would lie about this.

“The Lair, our home, has been destroyed.”

With an arm outstretched toward the kitchen chairs, you invite him to sit, but he remains crouched outside the window in the dark.

“We have to find somewhere to lie low. Leo will say it’s selfish to ask… that we can’t ask for more from your family… but it’s the only way I see it, that we can be safe and keep your family safe as well.”

Your blood runs cold. “My family? You think we’re at risk.”

“I honestly don’t know. But it stands to reason that anywhere we’ve been is at risk. We can defend your home, your family, if we are here. Or nearby. Perhaps there’s someplace-”

“No. Stay. Gran knows you guys now. I can spend the night in her room. You can spread out between mine and the living room. It’s not ideal, but it could work. Right?”

Donnie's eyes close as he considers what he's lost. “It’s more than we have. It’s more than-”

“It’s yours. I’ll talk to my parents. You know they’ll say yes." Shelter isn't the only help your family can provide. "My father will help anyway he can to find out who did this. And my mother, well, you know she’s fascinated by you guys.”

“Yeah.” There's a small shift in Donatello's stance that makes you retrace your words searching for the source of his discomfort.

“You don't like her poking around, do you?”

“We don’t want to be an experiment. A freakshow.”

“I don't think she sees.you like that, Donatello. But I’ll tell her to back off with the questions about your biology, if that helps.”

Donatello nods, but then shrugs. “I’ll tell her what I can. She's a doctor. If she's really going to help, she'll need to know.”

“Only what you’re comfortable sharing." You know Donatello has taken on the bulk of

medical care for his siblings. He's the expert. If he's acknowledging a need for your mother's help, there must be something about these new enemies, a new danger, he fears.

Concern fills the pit in your stomach. "Where are your brothers?”

Donatello's gaze slides to his right. “Mikey’s here.”

You peer out to see the youngest turtle perched upon the fire escape stairs, camouflaged by shadow. “Why don’t you guys come in?”

“...Cause,” Mikey says rubbing his hands together before giving you a stiff, lop-sided grin, “we’re takin’ you out.”

Your gaze passes between them and Donatello raises a hand to help you through the window. “Out?”

There's a graveness to Donatello's voice that makes Mikey's cheerfulness seem even more forced. “You asked where my brothers are. Well, Mikey’s here, yeah. But Raph and Leo…”

“They’re totally buggin, man.” Mikey's smile is still in place, but you see him swallow hard. You see the twitch at the corner of his eye as he struggles to keep his mood light.

Donatello nods solemnly. “You got through to Leo before. He doesn’t want to ask your family for more. But if you come-”

“I’ll come," you agree quickly. "Of course, I’ll come. Just… let me change clothes?”

Your search for a jacket takes longer than ever. Your mind races and your body quivers with excitement. It was one thing to invite them into your home after watching them fight, after seeing them injured.  It’s another thing to be invited into their home. No, what did Donatello call it?  Their Lair.  

You’re about to step into their world. A world of mutants and monsters. And you’re far less frightened than you think you should be.

[chrwrites]

It Still Beats For You

I won't be updating Take Me As You Please this week because of uni exams :(

For now enjoy this piece inspired by what my friends used to say about my ex 😂

"Remember when you told me how I was a loud melody and he was turning my music down? You were right"

or the one where the first thing Marinette does after she breaks up with her boyfriend is tell Luka

read on ao3

The end of a relationship shouldn't make you feel relieved, right? You should feel bad, or guilty if you're the one who ended it. Marinette, despite being the one who wanted the break up, didn’t feel any of this. Instead, she felt relief.

She had finally let go of the weight that carrying a loveless relationship had, and she felt lighter, like she could be herself again.

Her and Raphael had been together for four months, they met at university and went along immediately. It came naturally for them to start dating in their second semester. It was Marinette's first relationship, and she thought that her insecurity and awkwardness came from her inexperience. So she kept dating him, hoping that she would have eventually loosened up around him.

She didn't face the fact that love should come as natural as flowers blooming in spring until now. Was she really that desperate? Why did she listen to the people that said that never having been in a relationship by 19 was weird? She had other stuff to think about, a relationship wasn't her priority. She didn't have to apologize for that.

Still, that stupid peer pressure made Marinette force herself to feel love for someone when she didn't actually feel it. At least they hadn't been together for long, but she wished she'd seen it sooner.

Before realising that her relationship was doomed, she went on justifying her behaviour, "It's just because we've just started dating, it will take time for me to get comfortable around him", she told herself. Even when she confronted her friends about it, they told her the same thing, "It's fine Mari, Ivan and I were very awkward at first", Mylène reassured, and even though Marinette could see how her relationship was different from the ones she saw around her, she went on seeing Raphael.

When she'd introduced him to her friends, they all approved of him, saying he was a good guy and that he treated her right. So she went on seeing him, ignoring the times she felt uncomfortable around him and telling herself that she shouldn't have high expectations on him, he was nice, that was enough. (No, it wasn't).

The only person who didn't really support Marinette's relationship was Luka, and he was pretty open about it. Sometimes he would throw sarcastic comments around her, some other times he just suggested for her to break up with him because their melodies clashed. He was right, Marinette and Raphael were never meant to be, she wasn't ready to see it until now.

As she left Raphael in the café they’d met, Marinette thought about the first time she unconsciously realized that her relationship had to come to an end. It was April, the spring air was warm and the holidays had just started, so her friends decided to spend a week by the lake at Ivan's family cabin. The members of Kitty Section were joined by their sound technician, their exclusive designer, and their significant others.

Actually, it kind of looked like a romantic getaway for couples since most of her friends dated each other. They told Marinette that she could bring her boyfriend as well but she decided against it because… she didn’t want Luka to feel like he was third wheeling.

That’s how that week begun, and it quickly turned into her sitting on the passenger seat of Luka's car, choosing the music to listen to as he drove, her and Luka walking around the woods alone, late night talks between just the two of them and Marinette not being able to take her eyes off him as she watched him play guitar while they all sat in circle in the living room and sang every song that came to their minds.

She didn’t notice the way heart fluttered when he put a blanket on her shoulders or when they were too close. She hadn’t even noticed how her skin craved his touch in the smallest ways, for example when they were toasting to something or when he passed her the salt during dinner.

What about Raphael? They exchanged brief texts and quick phone calls when Marinette felt like calling him, nothing that kept her away from her friends for too long. Who would have wanted to spend a beautiful holiday by the lake on the phone? No one, and Marinette was fine with hearing so little from her boyfriend.

One night, she told Luka she was confused. She had seen so many different ways to love someone that week that she wondered why she didn’t feel what her friends felt for their partners, and why she felt like something was missing in her relationship with Raphael. Luka listened her rant about it attentively and when she finished, he put a hand on her shoulder, looked her straight in the eyes and said, “Marinette, I think he’s a good guy, but”, he took a deep breath before continuing to express what he had always felt, “he’s turning your music down”.

Marinette looked at him confused, “What do you mean?”

“Well, you’re so full of energy, so enthusiastic and creative”, he replied, “you’re like a loud melody, so extraordinary that no one would get tired to hear it, and he’s… he’s turning your music down. I can feel it”.

Oh.

That’s when her heart turned to Luka, but her mind wasn’t ready to face that yet so she went on seeing Raphael for another month, trying to ignore the voice in the back of her mind that whispered that Luka was better and that her melody shouldn’t be turned down.

Marinette smiled to herself while walking to her destination, she hadn't felt so light in a long time and she wanted to cherish that feeling. She had another thing to do before the day ended, and she was ready to face it despite its possible negative outcomes. What would have happened if he rejected her? It was probably too late, he must have moved and she was just being pathetic.

She tried to get rid of those thoughts as she waited for Luka to open the door to his apartment, shuffling her weight from one foot to another.

"Marinette? What are you doing here?" he said, his eyes widening in surprise. He didn't expect to find her at the door at 11 a.m. without any notice. If he did, he wouldn't have welcomed her wearing tracksuit pants and a tight tank top, not to mention his bed hair. He had just woken up and was about to have breakfast, for goodness sake. Why was the most extraordinary girl he knew at his door and why was she smiling so big?

"I broke up with Raphael" she answered.

That... was nothing to be smiling about.

"I'm sorry" the words left his mouth before Luka could think of something else to say. Honestly, he wasn't really sorry.

"I'm not" was all he heard from Marinette, the smile on her face growing bigger as he let her walk in. Luka chuckled while looking at her, her bright blue eyes were shining as they had never done in the past months. "Good" he finally said, it wasn't a secret that he didn't actually support her relationship; and it wasn’t because he was jealous of her, but because he saw that Marinette wasn't really happy with him, and since all Luka wanted for her was to be happy and serene, he did everything he could to make her understand that she was making a huge mistake in dating that guy.  What was his name again?

Luka offered the girl some tea before they both sat on the couch in the small living room. Marinette put the pink mug on the coffee table in front of her as she started talking, "Remember when you told me how I was a loud melody and he was turning my music down?" she looked at Luka, who nodded, "You were right".

“I’m glad you’ve finally come to your senses, Marinette”, the blue haired boy in front of her gave her a smile, the colour in his hair was starting to fade but the deep blue of his eyes made up for it, “you shouldn’t let anyone take your music from you”.

Marinette nodded in agreement, “I’m sorry it took me so long to figure this out”. Luka shook his head, “Some things take time, especially when your heart and your mind are in conflict. You shouldn’t feel sorry for this experience, I hope it made you understand yourself better”, he reassured. If only he knew what all of this had made her realise… Marinette forgot what she had to say, she came here with one thing in her mind and now the only thing she could do was nod at him.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked, his voice soft and calming as always.

The girl stayed silent for a moment, hoping to be able to recompose herself and find the courage that brought her there in the first place. When she opened her mouth to finally speak, Luka did the same.

“There’s something I –

“It’s okay if you don’t –  

They both laughed at each other, then Luka motioned for her to continue.

Marinette was trying to find the words again, she looked away from his gaze and then turned back to him, feeling a sudden shiver down her spine as their eyes locked. The atmosphere in the room wasn’t as light as before, Marinette’s smile faded from her face and Luka’s expression turned serious at her change of behaviour.

“I realized something” she said eventually, perfect wording Marinette, “I-I need someone who encourages me and understands me and never makes me feel uncomfortable and – she started fidgeting her hands – “that someone is you, Luka. I need you.”

Luka was taken aback from that statement, he shifted on the couch, his eyes wide in surprise. He didn’t know how to react, he had always thought that Marinette would have never loved him the way that he loved her, and he had accepted it. He tried to move on with little success, and when she told him that she was seeing someone, he decided to put his feelings aside for good. He was fine until he met him and saw that Marinette wasn’t really happy. He was fine until the cabin happened.

“I know that this is not the right time but I care about you Luka, and I want to be with you. And I think I’ve always wanted to be with you, but I didn’t see it until... – Marinette inhaled and looked down at her lap, she was still nervously playing with her hands. Luka was fighting the urge to make her stop by putting his hands on hers – until I started comparing him to you”.

“Marinette” the boy called her name softly.

She seemed not to have heard him since she started talking again, “I tried to ignore that, I told myself that the only reason I did it was because you are one of the few people who genuinely cares about me and shows it in the smallest way, so it was right for me to test him like this. You never let me walk away from your place with a sad face, and you never let me walk me home alone when it’s late at night. He... used to do that?

“And that hit me, you know? I ignored it just because I can take care of myself, but he didn’t seem to care about me. It seemed like I was the only one who was trying to make it work, and it wasn���t really worth it”, she concluded, still not brave enough to face him.

Luka stayed silent, what could he have possibly said?

“Luka, you make things easier, and I can be myself around you. You’re smart, kind, caring and… I love you”, she blurted out, finally turning to him “and I always have, and I’m sorry I didn’t see this before because it’s too late now and you must have moved on but I don’t want to do the same mistake again. I don’t want to let you go without you knowing how I feel about you”.

At that, Luka shook himself from his dumbfound state and took Marinette’s hands. He didn’t have the right words for her this time, so he decided to let his actions speak. He placed one of her hands on his chest, right where his heart was beating and Marinette gave him a confused look though her big blue eyes.

“It still beats for you”, he said, a sweet smile forming on his face. Marinette’s face bloomed with joy as she leaned into him, cupping his face with both of her and kissing him. He responded to her gesture almost immediately, placing his hand on the back of her neck as he kissed her back. It was slow, tender and warm, and Marinette felt like she could melt into his strong arms. She smiled on his lips, kissing Luka was like a breath of fresh air after spending a long day in her room working on her designs, it was as sweet as summer and as delicate as the way he moved his fingers on his guitar when he played her heart’s song. Marinette had never felt so happy.

Luka pressed his forehead into hers when they parted, and gently thumbed her cheek as their eyes locked. They admired each other in comfortable silence before Luka spoke, “Listen, since you interrupted my breakfast, how about I treat you to lunch?”

“I’d love to”, Marinette smiled, finally feeling that everything was falling into place.

[milasartblog]

How i got feather necklace?

I know that the title for this story is not mysterious or cool or intrigue, but most of my demons used to ask me several times about it. After several years and even long time ago, i decided that it would be logic to tell you guys a little story behind it. So, take your sits, bring some delicious snacks with tea. Maybe you can even take your shirts off if it's too hot for you~ Just kidding, let's start our story~

You all know me as a Lucifer, the Ruler of Hell nowadays. And I'm pretty sure that you know my background of how I became like this and how I got to Hell. However, despite being archangel before, I spent several years to get used to this place. It was not that easy, especially when you still felt the wrath to the one who was supposed to be your Father, but turned against you. Even your siblings did the same. Yes, I hated my brothers too after the War, so much that I swore to myself to never poke my nose into Heaven. And the news from Lilith about my Father using my situation for his own sake, made my hatred stronger. I tried to get rid off everything that was somehow connected to Heaven, even burnt my grey feather wings, despite the pain i had on my back. But as we all know, wrath can't last long.

And so one day, when i more or less got used to Hell, I got bored and tried to find what to do. I could spent time with succubi, but it was not what I wanted that day. Even after visiting Cerberus, I felt that something was missing, that there was...a void inside my heart. And at that exact moment, a thought of visiting Heaven appeared in my mind. For couple of minutes, I argued with myself either to break my oath, or stay like this for the rest of my life. In the end, my curiousity defeated the oath and I used my powers to sneak into Heaven.

Of course I did my best to stay undiscovered, as Gabriel didn't like me, despite the fact that demons can still interract with angels somehow. When I got into angel's garden (not the one the Gardener made), I saw a scene, that later changed my view. Gabriel didn't change that much, except he got more serious than before, Raphael was already with Rachel, and Michael being Michael. At first, I was already ready to leave with thoughts that nothing changed since I fell into Hell. But what made me stop was....the smile, artificial one. And it was from Michael after Gabriel mentioned me. Everyone got upset at once. We all knew that he had never had such smile. And yet, there it was. I got confused for a moment as some minutes later my siblings continued chatting and discussing some angelic plans for a day. But they were not important for me.

When they finished my siblings and Rachel went to their directions. I followed first Gabriel and found out that he has a position of the guard of Gates. Let's be honest, it's one of the most boring thing that could be in Heaven and I didn't envy him. Then I followed Raphael and Rachel, who were just walking and having a nice date. He is such lucky guy to have one of the strongest healer. Not like Archangels and my siblings, but Rachel can fight back if need to. After couple of minutes, I followed Michael, who just came back to his room. To be more sneaky, I had to turn into snake, and when i got inside, I noticed a lot of papers on Michael's table, that made me stunned of how much work he got at that time. But that was only a little thing that concerned me. When I got into position in which I could see Michael's face, something shattered in my soul. I have never seen him so tired and upset, I could even say "depressed"? He was signing up some documents while mumbling something to himself. Fortunately i had good hearing to understand every word. He blamed himself. A lot. For everything. He wished he could changed things for good, that he had enough power to make the conflict vanished between me and my Father. And he had a reason for it: family was important for him, even more than just those tasks he was doing and still doing. He hardly endured any conflicts, and always blamed himself. Who could imagine that after that day someone will actually miss me? Sure, i caused a War, I did terrible things, I became the one whom my Father would not accept, but....I didn't expect that my siblings would miss me. Well, not sure about Gabriel, but still. I couldn't stay inside the room anymore, and after couple of minutes, I slipped away.

When i came back to Hell, for couple of hours I fought with my inner feelings. I remember being in a huge rage that I broke several things and even furniture. No demon dared to come closer to me. And when i finally calmed down, I looked at myself in the mirror. I began to blame myself as well, feeling guilty for everything. After couple of minutes, I decided to try to summon my angel wings, but only one feather appeared and fell down. When I picked it up, I looked at it and suddenly, an idea came to my mind.

And after some seconds, I made an necklace and this feather became a memory and a key to Heaven. Well, that's the story. Kinda boring, right? But still, I'm glad that I told you this story to you. It honestly made me feel easier, like a great weight off my mind~ Anyways, hope you enjoyed, now I have to go and do my demon stuff~ Maybe we will see each other next time~

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And that's another story for our universe^^ Before i used to write from Axel's perspective, but today decided to try from Lucifer's one. I hope you will enjoy it^^

Lucifer, Cerberus, Michael, Raphael and Rachel belong to @wildstarfan and @milasartblog (both me)

Lilith belongs to @wildstarfan and @captainthane

Gabriel belongs to @jenny626 and @jenniesart

Okaria et Feria belongs to @wildstarfan @captainthane and @jenny626

[ladyadalicialove]

Me, says I will be on hiatus and probs won’t post anything cus exams and essays

Also me: procrastinating very hard

Don't mind me just salty about the new episode and what not...also I don’t want to finish my essay.

Anyway since Chat Blanc was basically fanservice that served no significant purpose to the plot of the show other than "what if" scenarios. I've decided to share some AUs to put some good wholesome content back into the fandom. 

Also I need to write these things down before I forget....

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Previous Holder is now your Babysistter AU

(I don’t have an actual name for it lmao suggestions?)

I’ve had this one in head for a couple of months now. The premise of this AU is the miraculous doesn't just come with the Kwami but a ghost/apparition of the previous holder. Unlike the kwami's they aren't what makes the suit or have any magical abilities. Rather they are just glorified babysitters, looking after and guiding the new holder the best they can. Some are some magical rules with them though:

Only the miraculous holder and thier Kwami can see them, when they are still in their civilian forms.

 They don’t disappear when the holder transform.

When other miraculous holders are transformed they can see other holder’s apparition, but when they undo the transformation they can no longer see them. 

The holders and kwamis can touch them as if they were real, but they phase through everything and everyone else.

I liked the idea of the holders prior to Marinette and Adrien being a pirate and a sailor who fell madly in love. They unfortunately died together and never had kids so when they came back as “mentors” for two lovesick teens they adopt them so quickly.

Adrien gets Captain Noir, the most ferocious and seductive pirate of the seven seas! And she absolutely adores Adrien and quickly assumes a motherly role in his life. The captain doesn’t like that he is alone in the mansion and gives every second of her attention to him. She calls him her "big kitten" and tries to ruin Gabriel's day every second she can. She also despises Nathalie but tolerates Gorilla.

Marinette gets Commander Bug, a stoic and ever so suave solider of his majesty's Royal Navy. He is very chill and helps Marinette to calm down when she starts acting up. Since he is a high ranking soldier, he often assists Marinette in creating strategies to defeat villains in both her hero and civilian life. Tbh he is a very reliable guy and very sweet. 

Honestly the two of them basically become parents to the two lovesick teens... and I imagine the story would literally be them ready to throw hands with Gabriel and Lila. Commander bug though ever so serious, meets Lila and immediately takes on the Captain Noir’s more... vulgar traits. 

Commander Bug: Hey Marinette *nudges her* Dead men tell no tales. 😎 *makes obscene gesture towards Lila*

Marinette: FOR THE LAST TIME IM NOT MURDERING LILA

Tikki: no wait maybe he has a point

Captain Noir: Ye really need to scupper that deadbeat father of yours off the side of this building. Hey Plagg, do ye think I can take custody of Adrien??

Adrien: I’m not throwing my father off the building!! He can be nice!!

Captain Noir: Oh no ye have Stockholm syndrome... maybe I can cure it with some rum?? That always helped the new sailors who were home sick! 😱

Adrien: oh my god I’m only fourteen 😦

Plagg: *laughing hysterically* at least you can drink your woes away!!! 😂🤣

And yes they both like the Couffaines mainly because they live on a boat. 

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The Mythical Miraculous AU:

I wrote and planned this one before it was revealed there are multiple miraculous boxes. So in this universe let’s just say that the events of feast never happened. Prior to the “episode” Fu relinquishes guardianship and loses his memories. Let’s say there is no sentimonster that caused the downfall of the monks but rather Fu causing the temple to burn down another way. How? Maybe he left a torch unsupervised and burned the place down. Why? Idk that’s just how it’s happening now.

Anyway this AU stemmed from doing so many OC drawing requests in January. And I created seven miraculous OC's whose kwamis/concept are based on the seven virtues. They are also all based on mythical creatures.

In the story I imagined that Marinette is 17 and was giving guardianship over the miracle box some time ago. One day while messing around with it, she discovers that underneath the ying and yang centre piece there was cyclinder compartment that contained a parchment. Unrolling it had printed on it six locations along with the name of the miraculous associated.

Tikki informs her of the seven miraculous that were created as backups if the the miracle box or miraculous’ were ever stolen, lost, destroyed etc. Basically the last resort. Thus they needed to be kept out of the miracle box and in the world and always ready to defend. Hence they were given to families across Europe/Asia who promised their loyalties to the miraculous cause. 

Marinette decides since it’s summer break and she isn’t busy, to find each of them and get them to help in the fight against Hawkmoth. Tikki just rolls with it.

In no particular order these are the mythical miraculous and their holders:

London, UK ~ The Unicorn and Pegasus Miraculous of Kindness and Humility: They are currently owned by 12 year old British Twins, Iris and Ivy. They come from a rich family and only recently acquired the miraculous from their father and uncle. Ivy is all about sports and is extremely athletic, Iris prefers to read and paint. Apollo is Ivy’s kwami and he is a white unicorn, and Artemis is Iris’ kwami and is a black pegasus. The miraculous are anklets. 

Sovana - Tuscany, Italy ~ The Ogre Miraculous of Charity: Currently owned by Raphael, a 21 year old Italian guy studying Archaeology. He lives out in the Italian countryside with his parents and many siblings, he has a big family who owns a huge block of farmland. He is super kind and very charitable and received his miraculous from his Nonna. Orc is Raphael’s kwami and he is a selfish little bastard but he is huggable. The miraculous is a belt buckle.

Nice, Paris ~ The Pooka Miraculous of Diligence: Currently owned by Colette, a 25 year old French girl who is busy teaching six year olds, she doesn’t have any family as she was orphaned as an infant. She has always had her miraculous as she was left at the orphanage with it. She was unfortunately never adopted out, but she is extremely motivated individual with big dreams. Cinna is Colette’s kwami, she is quite lazy and often called Cinna-bun. The miraculous is a hair clip.

Kazan, Russia ~ The Phoenix Miraculous of Chastity/Abstinence: Currently owned by Orion, a flamboyant and arrogant 30 year old. He is extremely beautiful and a very proud man, and most would think he is a bit of a f*ckboi but nope. He is just saving himself for the right person. His father gifted him the miraculous when he was 15. Newborn is Orion’s kwami, and she is little b*tch and very stuck up. The miraculous is an armband.

Nazareth, Israel ~ The Griffin Miraculous of Patience: Currently owned by Nevaeh, a 16 year old revolutionist and active feminist. She has big ideas and big dreams that she hopes with enough dedication and patience she can achieve. Unlike the others, she received the miraculous from her dying neighbour, who was an old man in his nineties who had no children. Nevaeh may not be an intended holder but she is a brilliant one! Constance is Navaeh’s kwami, she is extremely wise and a soft speaker. The miraculous is a thumb ring. 

Seoul, Korea ~ The Sea Serpent Miraculous of Temperance: Currently owned by 19 year old aspiring pop singer Levi. Levi is extremely shy and laid back, he tends to be soft-spoken and polite.Often he dreams of being an Idol but his shy personality isn’t doing him any favours. His older brother was originally the miraculous holder but instead of accepting any potential responsibility he dumped it onto him. It was originally gifted to his brother by their mother. Sai is Levi’s kwami, he is extremely skittish and is just riddled with anxiety over the belief of the world ending. He is a bit of a conspiracy theorist. The miraculous is a fin pendant necklace.

Of course Marinette in three months convinces them all to go to Paris and stay there until the defeat of Hawkmoth. 

During her travels and time with them, she unravels the mysterious of these seven miraculous and their history. What are their abilities? Why do they specifically correlate with the seven virtues? How powerful are they? 

Ivy and Iris stemming from a rich family, rent out a lovely penthouse for the seven of them in Paris. Colette decides to be the legal guardian of the minors since she actually is French. Orion decides he is gonna be a dick. The rest are there for a good time and to kick a buterrfly's butt. And thus ensue chaos, pranks, romance and a whole lotta arguing. 

I can only imagine all the kwami’s and Marinette sitting, drinking green tea while watching these seven holders become absolute hooligans.

I already drew up concept art of them but they are not good sketches so yeah maybe I will show you guys another time.

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Idk why I think this but I just figured everyone would hate AUs like this so I don’t bother posting these ideas especially if they are not fleshed out. I have so many but these are my most promising ones. 

The previous holder AU is one of my favourites because I had Captain Noir and Commander Bug’s story in my head forever. I love me some pirates. I know their whole miraculous story, like how they fell in love and why she became a pirate etc. The part where they become ghost mentors is a fairly new addition, been rolling it around for a month now and it is 100% caused by the shitty parenting via la agreste.  

The mythical miraculous one is extremely fun for me, but it was one of those AUs were I believed no one would like it so....yeah enjoy it?

If you wanna know more about each one send me an ask or send names suggestions!!

[cas-backwards-tie]

The Caretaker

Prince!Castiel x Commoner!Reader

Summary: Prince Castiel has just been informed by his father King Chuck that he’s to be married to a princess of a nearby kingdom. Castiel would much rather marry his BFF: Best Forbidden Friend, Y/N, who is a commoner. Who will Castiel choose?

Warnings: Arranged Marriage, Black-Mail, Threats

Author’s Note: This is another collab w/ @ready-set-run , which is a complimentary series to The Ploy. We couldn’t choose between Castiel or Dean for this idea so we decided to write two different stories both with a similar premise. Personally I love this one more than the Dean version, but oh well. They’re both quite simply amazing! 

Castiel’s POV (by @ready-set-run)

“Castiel, I want you to become king after I’m no longer here,” my father says, staring straight at me.

I choke on the tea I’ve been drinking. I have to clear my throat before speaking. “I’m sorry, what was that?” I ask him incredulously, staring at him from across the small sitting room.

“Out of all my children, I want you to be the one who runs this kingdom after I pass,” Father clarifies, speaking slowly as thought that will help me understand what he’s trying to tell me.

I blink a couple of times, staring off in disbelief. After some moments pass, I look back up at my father. “You must be mistaken. Many of my brothers would be better suited to this than me. Lucifer is the oldest after all.” He quickly dismisses my protest with the shake of his head. “I picked you for a reason, Castiel. You’re the most responsible in your studies. Not only that, but you already know so much about the kingdom. It would be a mistake not to choose you to rule after me.”

I let out a heavy sigh, pinching the bridge of my nose. “Aren’t I suppose to get married before becoming King? Lucifer and Michael are both engaged, and Raphael is seeing a duchess. Father, I don’t even dance well. How am I supposed to find a lady to marry?”

“I’m glad you asked. I’ve been trying to make this decision for a while and that very matter came up in my thought process. During a recent discussion of trade regarding our neighboring kingdoms, I was informed that one of them has a daughter your age. I was assured that she is very beautiful.” He takes a sip of his own tea. “So, I made the decision that the two of you shall wed in about a month’s time.”

I have to pay attention so my jaw doesn’t drop to the floor. “A month?! Do you really think that’s a good idea? Doesn’t that seem a bit hasty to you?”

The King shakes his head and stands to exit. “Not at all! The sooner the better.” He smiles and makes his way to the door. “I’m not getting any younger, now am I?” he adds before walking out the door.

I sit in stunned silence for a few moments before getting up and standing on the open-air balcony. I lean against the marble and look over it to examine the kingdom below me. The kingdom that my father just told me is going to become my kingdom. I stay there until the towns fade into darkness and the tiny light of candles flicker in what I can only assume to be the windows of houses.

I sigh and return to my quarters, disrobing and climbing into bed. I stare up at the ceiling with my arms behind my head, trying to analyze all of the thoughts running through my mind. One sticks out. “I have to tell Y/N…” I whisper into the darkness, an image of her staying in my mind as I drift off into the dark world of sleep.

Y/N’s POV (by @cas-backwards-tie)

Today was Sunday- which meant we all went to Church and spent the day cherishing our lives and worshipping our creator. I listened thoughtfully to the sermon, and listened as the pastor again decided to tell the story of Adam and Eve once again this Sunday. I honestly enjoyed my Sundays, and usually those would be the days that I would happen to ‘bump’ into Castiel- my childhood best friend- we usually met at the same place, which just so happened to be in a nearby field filled with bunches and bunches of daisies. As church ended I took up my small shall which I used as a bag, carrying a wide variety of little knick-knacks and some snacks.

It was a quiet day- as Sundays usually are in our kingdom- as I walked down Old Hickett Road to the end, where I turned off to the right to walk through the woods to the secluded well-known field of ours. I knew Castiel would be waiting for me, as he usually was considering his family started church late, but also got out earlier too- I just so happen to know this little ‘secret’ because Castiel had told me, though, this also means that the rulers of our kingdom are not as religious as they show themselves off to be. I’m not sure how I feel about that, but I couldn’t think on this for too long as I was anticipant to see Castiel knowing that we haven’t spoken in almost two weeks, and I was longing to be in his cheerful, thoughtful, introspective presence. 

The sun shown as if it was around ten in the morning to my estimation- which only meant that Castiel and I would have maybe two or three hours at most to catch up with one another before we had to part ways. I hate the fact that I simply can’t interact with my best friend anymore- due to the fact that since we were not children anymore, and I was a quaint commoner, and he a prince- we weren’t supposed to be ‘friends’, let alone really mere acquaintances or peers for that matter. Though we still couldn’t part ways just yet, and I don’t think we ever will- we simply I feel, are if there is such a thing- kindred spirits.  

“Isn’t it such a lovely day?” Castiel started conversation as he saw me approaching him out of the woods to our spot. A small patch of grass in which two bigger boulders lay- we use them as chairs- and a flatter boulder lay to the side which could function as a table if need be. “The birds are singing, there’s a faint breeze, and of course I mean, you’re here, so how could it not be lovely?” Castiel remarked- the last part of his sentence a little awkward- but then again he was sometimes awkward, especially if he was nervous. 

“Yes, I’d say it is. Honestly Castiel, these are my favorite days of the year! The sun kissing our skin during the day, and taking cold swims in the lake, honestly- these are probably when we have, and had the most fun” I trailed off, reminiscing to past summers I’d spent with Castiel even though it was technically the beginning of fall. Castiel remained quiet, seemingly trying to piece together his thoughts into words- and yes I appreciate when people actually think of their words before they speak them, but he was taking quite a while…

“Are you alright Castiel?” I question as I place my bag-functioning-shall down onto one of the boulders. Putting a hand on his shoulder I stare into his eyes, which are gazing somewhere off in the field currently. I try to tickle him a little, victoriously gaining his attention, “Are you okay?” I question with a concerned smile as he stares into my eyes then proceeds to smile wide and stand up.

“Well, quite frankly yes, as well as no. I got some news Y/N, and I’ve been constantly thinking over how I was going to tell you for the past few days- knowing we couldn’t see each other and all- and I really just think being straight forward is the best option here.” Castiel rambles, which is not a good sign considering the Prince has a reputation for being concise and well-spoken when giving speeches and informally talking. What he was saying was worrying me as I didn’t know how he was going to end this- was he going to tell me that we couldn’t see each other anymore? Did someone die? No, I’m sure I would’ve heard about that if someone had surely died…

“Y/N?” Castiel waved his hand in front of my face, trying to get my attention as I now too had zoned out. I made eye contact with him to let him know I was listening before he continued, “Look, I’ll just say it- okay? My father, well… He told me I am to be king” Castiel blurted out, “in a month’s time.” He added shortly, as if scared for the last part. I take this news in before standing up.

“King?! That’s amazing Castiel! That’s fantastic in fact! This is what you’ve been training for your whole life, I mean- aren’t you excited? This is great news!” I walked over to him, embracing him in a hug as I squeezed a little to show my excitement. I know this is a big deal, and that certainly he’s been dreaming about this for his whole life- even if he never thought that he’d be the one to be chosen out of his many brothers. I also know that he can handle this; Castiel is a natural-born leader and he’s always been kind when interacting with the commoners, he treats them as human beings unlike some of the other rulers or royal kin I’ve seen when they’d come to visit our kingdom for balls or parties.

“Y/N,” Castiel tried to stop my rambling of excitement by pressing both hands onto my shoulders. Eventually I stop complimenting him and encouraging why he’d be a great king to him as he says my name again, catching my attention this time. “Y/N… I’m going to be king.” Castiel says mysteriously as if trying to hint at some secret message we hadn’t come up with yet. I switch weight from foot to foot, raising a brow to try and show him that he isn’t making any sense to me.

“With every king, comes a queen.” Was he- did I- he wasn’t…. No he wasn’t asking.

“What?” I say the words before I even fully process myself thinking them. His hands which are still placed among my shoulders begins to rub them ever so gently- almost in a soothing manner. 

“My father has arranged a marriage for me.” I zone out as Castiel’s words echo in my head. Hearing these words, they sound so far away- like I am underwater and he is above, speaking to me as though I was drowning. I try to process what he’s telling me, though it’s not a lot of information- it contradicts everything I’ve known for the last thirteen years of my life.

Castiel’s POV (by @ready-set-run)

I gently shake Y/N by the shoulders, the feeling of worry engulfing me. “Y/N. Say something. Please. Don’t just stare.” I look deep into her eyes, trying to get her to focus on me again.

She slowly smiles at me and touches my cheek. “I hope she’s beautiful and kind,” she whispers. Her eyes are locked on mine and, even though she’s smiling, I can tell she’s not happy in the slightest.

I shake my head and move my hands so their gently cupping her cheeks. “That’s not the point. The point is that I’m not going to be able to be with you.” She shrugs and smiles sadly. “We hardly see each other all too often anyhow. Sure, it’ll take a bit of getting used to, but it’ll be alright.” 

“That’s not quite what I meant, Y/N,” I say softly, leaning closer to her and nearly resting my forehead on hers. It’s hard not to get lost in her beautiful Y/E/C eyes. “You were the first person I thought of when my father told me. I can’t spend time away from you.” My voice begins to shake and I can’t help but scold myself. This is no way for a King to act, I internally scream. Not only that, but you’re spending time with a commoner. It doesn’t matter that she’s the one you trust the most. It isn’t important that she’s the one you’ve always imagined spending the rest of your life with.

I’m startled out of my thoughts by Y/N’s soft hand touching my cheek. “Castiel? You okay?” She smiles again weakly, staring up at me. Good Lord, I love her eyes… “Is it your turn to drift off into the space of your thoughts?” 

I smile back at her, cheeks growing a bit hot. “Maybe. I promise it’s not without good reason, though.”

She laughs a bit, her gentle fingers playing with my hair. I tell myself I need to pull away, but I’m enjoying the feeling too much. I tug myself out of my trance and put my hands on her waist before taking a step back. I can tell this hurts her, but I try to tell myself this is for the best.

“Let’s just enjoy our day together. It’s a beautiful Sunday and I don’t want this to bring us down. I just… wanted to get this off of my chest.”

She nods a bit, the smile on her lips not quite reaching her eyes like it usually does. Not only that, but her eyes have become clouded over. “Of course. We should make the best out of what time we have left together.”

I nod in agreeance and offer my arm to her. She loops her arm through mine and we begin to walk towards a small waterfall we used to visit when we were younger and these worries about futures had yet to cross our minds. 

Y/N’s POV (by @cas-backwards-tie)

We spend the afternoon swimming at the waterfall- the pain of earlier being long forgotten. We push each other into the swimming hole every once in a while, causing us to play-fight. “You’re not gonna do it! You’re too scared!” Castiel taunts me from the bottom of the swimming hole as I stand at the top of the waterfall taking a deep breath before jumping off the ledge into the water. “Cannon-ball!” I yell as I plunge into it’s depths, being engulfed by the cold, smooth water. I look up from the bottom, watching the sun filter through the water, it’s rays separating and casting a heavenly light on the water. I swim up and breach the water gasping for air, laughing. 

“I wasn’t ‘too scared’, I told you I’d do it!” I smacked Castiel’s arm lightly as I pushed his head underwater for a second. He came back up and splashed water in my direction as he flicked his brown wet hair out of his eyes like a dog shaking the water off its body after swimming.

“I guess you’re right.” He chuckled before swimming underneath the waterfall behind it to a ledge of rocks that could be used as a bench. I followed suit and sat with him behind the waterfall. “This is such a cool place, isn’t it?” he says so quietly I almost don’t hear it.

“Yeah, I’m so glad we found it.” I smile, reminiscing all the times we’d first started coming here- never daring to jump off the top ledge at first because it was too tall for either of us. I remember hunting for mushrooms around the perimeter of the swimming hole, selling them to the town square and having the clerks ask us where we got valuable mushrooms, to which we just giggled and exchanged a secret glance. I remember coming here for the first time at night- when the moon was high and bright, and the fireflies lead the path for us to be able to swim happily and find our way home- that was the first time that we’d both confessed our feelings for each other- it was here, in this spot. I smiled, feeling nostalgia warm my heart and wish for it back.

Castiel and I exchanged stories of what we’d been up to lately, all the way from his recent shenanigans that his conniving brothers had been pulling recently, to the recent foolery that the townspeople had been speaking of.

The day was nice, we spent all afternoon at the swimming hole talking, playing and chatting and now it was finally time for Castiel to drop me off at the edge of the town, where he always waited till I was out of sight. I walked arm in arm with him till we got to the border, and turned to say goodbye. “See ya later, Alligator.” I half-smiled as I held his hand in mine. I love his smile- and his laugh. He smiled and laughed at my remark before he stared back into my eyes- I love his eyes… I’m going to miss them. I remember that this was goodbye- not to ‘see ya later’, but for good… If he didn’t pull away soon I was going to have to pull away first because I couldn’t bear to let him see me cry. 

“See ya later.” He half-smiled back, his eyes beginning to have a shimmer to them as I knew he was close to crying. “Sleep well” he offered, as his free hand moved to my shoulder this is the last time he’ll hold me like that. 

I wanted to tell him ‘I love you’, but the words wouldn’t break through the knot in my throat- keeping me from crying. “Sleep well, Castiel” I offered back before quickly turning, not offering a hug as I knew I’d cry if he hugged me. I quickly walked home, waiting till I knew I was out of his sight and began to quietly sob. I love him- it’s true, I never truly spent a lot of time thinking about it as I always saw him and knew he’d always come back for me. I knew that he was always going to be there for me, with his beautiful smile, his beautiful, graceful eyes peering into my own, reflecting back all the ways that I could be a better person not only for him- but for myself.

I’d gotten too used to having him there- I never thought about the fact that one day he wouldn’t be mine anymore. He never was- not really. But I love him- and my heart is breaking. I collapse in the small grass field outside of my property and lie there crying to myself as I hug my basket to myself, wishing things didn’t have to be this way- he’s my best friend. No, he was your best friend I battled my thoughts and eventually got up and forced myself to go to bed and take care of myself. As I remembered how great the day was, and replayed all the details over again in my head silent tears rolled down my cheeks to my pillow. I realized that it was true- the thing that my older sister always joked about when I was younger was true: I love him. I love Castiel…

Castiel’s POV (by @ready-set-run)

I arrive back at the castle with a heavy heart. I feel so alone to the point that it’s hard to drag my feet another step, knowing they’re taking me further away from Y/N. It’s so hard to conceptualize the fact that… that this might have been the last time we’d ever see each other again. 

The moment I set foot within the Great Hall, my oldest half-brother jumps all over my case. “Where were you all day, Castiel?” Lucifer strides up to me with purpose, fury burning in his eyes. He stops right in front of me, so close I can almost smell his soap. 

I set my stance and stand tall. “Why does it matter to you?” I ask gruffly in response. 

I can see my brother’s hands shaking as he tries not to ball them into fists. “Because we all know Father is planning something for you, and you’re not following your basic responsibilities.” He nearly shouts at me.

I push past him and continue on my way back to my quarters to wash up and dress for supper. “I was going for a ride, Lucifer. Enjoying the fresh air. Not all of my time must be spent in the stuffy air of this place.” He stops me by grabbing my shoulder.

“Don’t lie to me, Castiel!” he shouts as he spins me around to face him again. His voice is now a harsh whisper as he pins me against one of the stone pillars in the hall. “I know you spend time with that peasant girl. We all do. Now I don’t know what game you’re trying to play, but if you don’t step up to the plate and follow through with your responsibilities, I’m going to tell our father about what you’ve been doing all these years.”

Dread fills my body and twists my stomach into a knot at the realization that I’ve been being watched for all these years. Not only that, but here was Lucifer, a man who shares my blood, threatening to blackmail me with this information. I have to take a deep breath before being able to respond to him. “You wouldn’t interfere if there wasn’t anything in the deal for you. What do you want, Lucifer?” I growl, shoving him back a few steps before straightening my clothes. 

He huffs, as if offended by what I just accused him of. “Well, either you act like the royalty you are and you stop seeing that peasant, or I’ll tell Father about how treasonous you’ve been all these years.”

I want to yell at him for calling Y/N a peasant, but I know it’ll just encourage him more. Instead, I give him a curt nod and never break eye contact. “Very well,” I say before turning on my heel and continuing my way to my quarters. 

As soon as I’m inside, I lock the door and close my eyes. This task shouldn’t be too hard. If anything, I think it’ll be good for me. This will give me a reason to stop seeing Y/N. But something is bothering me. The thought is gnawing at me. As I stand in front of the wash basin and splash my face with cold water, I realize what’s bothering me so much about it. The thought is this: I’m in love with Y/N. 

The thought lingers with me all through supper, and my father gives me this look like he knows what’s bothering me. Lucifer glares at me all through dinner as if daring me to make a mistake. He knows more than he’s telling me… I can feel it. It’s always been this way with him. I’m snapped out of my thoughts by my youngest brother, Samandriel, jogging to catch up with me after I leave the dining hall. 

“Cas! Wait up!” He gasps for breath as he slows to a walk beside me. 

“Hi Salamander,” I say with a gentle smile, ruffling his hair. He pouts in response to his nickname but doesn’t leave my side.

After he finally catches his breath, he starts to talk. “What was going on during supper? You weren’t talking about the kingdom like you usually do. You wouldn’t even talk about the ball that’s coming up soon. We have to start planning a prank for this one!”

I chuckle quietly at his enthusiasm, but I can’t lie to him. He’s one of the only people who can read me near perfect. The only other person who could do that was Y/N. “I’m sorry, Salamander. Today’s been a busy day.”

“Why? Were you with Y/N again?”

I stop walking, looking at my little brother with wide eyes. “How’d you know about that?”

Samandriel smiles up at me. “Lucifer told me about her.” I feel my cheeks grow hot and I turn around to continue walking.

“Well were you?” he asks me again. I internally groan at how persistent he is regarding this topic.

I sigh and stop as I reach the door to my quarters. I close my eyes and pinch the bridge of my nose. “Yes, Salamander. I was.” I crouch down so I’m level with him and put my hands on his shoulders. “But please. Don’t tell Father. Promise?”

He nods excitedly like I just told him the best secret in the world. “Promise.” He throws his arms around my neck and hugs me before saying goodnight and running down the hall and dashing into his own room.

I smile after him before standing up and entering my quarters, quickly closing and locking the door behind me. With all the thoughts running through my head, it’s a wonder I sleep at all. That seems to have become a trend recently… getting lost in my thoughts. I should probably work on the chaos inside my head. There’s only one thing I want to focus on. But I can’t think about Y/N any more. If I do, I’ll surely go crazy.

[inthehouseofflies-blog1]

♖ (modern!Lucy, WSW!Don, CoC!Torleik, CoC!Kon, CoC!Lisel) // ♞ (Midyan, Modern!Don, WSW!Lucy, CoC!Damian, CoC!Christoph) //♟(Modern!Gideon, WSW!Mary, CoC!Eve, CoC!Claus, CoC!Viviette) // ☂ (Modern!Mary, Velius, CoC!Viktorya, CoC!Eudora) // ♨ (Modern!Eli, WSW!Wallas, WSW!Julien, CoC!Louis, CoC!Viala)

♖ for one of my muses guilty pleasures //

Lucy (Modern)I think she loves reality television. She knows how incredibly scripted and empty it all is, but she can’t help but get sucked in on a day off and binge watch entire seasons of it. Lucy would also never admit it, but on particularly lonely nights, she reads them while taking a long bubble bath.

Donovan (HP)Guilty is the key word here and it makes this very hard. I think one of the things he does that he isn’t too proud of but absolutely enjoys, is sitting for hours on his bedroom floor while looking over all his medals, photos, memorabilia, etc. of his glory days. He knows it’s pathetic, but he likes to remember that at some point in his life, he was somebody.

Torleik (CoC) It’s not incredibly different or unusual in Arvidor, but for Torleik, taking time to admire the beauty of the trees and unique greenery of his land is definitely something to be ashamed of. Not that he’s ashamed of admitting that Arvidor is vastle beautiful and even that kind of beauty isn’t lost on someone like him, but that he wasn’t actively being productive. That’s what he’d be ashamed of.

Konstantin (CoC) Oh, Konstantin has about a thousand. Everything he loves is a guilty pleasure. From sucking off his cousin (LOL)  to spending twice the amount of time getting ready that normal Vollstachtian men do... Konstantin is constantly in a state of guilt. And his relatives don’t exactly make it easy for him. After all, this is the land of fire and steel and here he is fussing over the exact placement of the ruffles on his cravat and bitching his twin sister up and down for her heinous taste in men.

Liselotte (CoC) I think she certainly feels and does regrettable things, but I’m not sure she feels guilty for any... From wishing she was dead (to be with her parents), to forcing Raphael to spend time with her when it clearly bothers him in some way, to defying her uncle at every turn... I don’t know that what she enjoys, she feels guilty for. Huh... I’ll have to think more about this one, because I feel there’s something I’m forgetting. OH, you know what... she does take pleasure in having Killian’s attention, but also feels guilty for wanting it because of their first “disagreement”. I think some part of her knows she should loathe him for that but... I DON’T KNOW. Confused child, confusing me.

♞ for something that my muse wants to do //

Midyan (Main) More than anything, he wants to return to the under realm with Miryam and return to doing what they were born to do. However, he’d never admit that the toll the mortal world is taking on him is very, very real. And he knows Miryam is enjoying their banishment, and would never force her back with him. He knows they may soon come to an impasse and it keeps him up at night.

Donovan (Modern)Oh man, he’s so motivated now that Bailey is in his life. Donovan was content to his shitty, pathetic life. Even on the path to recovery from his alcoholism, he wasn’t exactly excited about it. But with Bailey... now he wants to get a good job, get a nicer place in a good part of town, make it comfortable for her... for them. He wants to build a life for them; he sees his future only with her or he doesn’t have one at all.

Lucy (HP)She wants to live outside her identity as a squib. Even though she’s more valuable than ever, she wants to be valuable for more than just that. I think, sometimes, when she’s tired at the end of her shift, she wishes she had someone to curl up next to. Thank God for Rhea, because sometimes a best friend is exactly what she needs (and they have similar struggles about being known for something that isn’t them as a whole), but Lucy has never been loved outside of that. It’s am empty part of herself she doesn’t know needs filling just yet.

Damian (CoC)He wants to marry Aniah and return to the man he was before at the same time. He craves his status, his reputation, his attitude being returned. And honestly, if she says yes to him, it will all flood back. He’ll be stronger, actually. Far more charming; more in control; a better player on the grand, political stage that is court life.

Christoph (CoC) Christoph wants to bring his old pal back. He wants to get Rafael back to his old self (just short of the arrogance which got him cursed, of course) and he wants all his cousins to be happy again. He wants the old life back with all its fun. None of these politics and new dangers at court. He’d also like for Vollstacht to embrace Kiya because honestly, look at that face. Come on, now.

♟ for something my muse admires

Gideon (Modern) Alice. He absolutely admires her strength. She can smile even in the worst circumstances. She has the kind of resiliance that he believes is rare and massively valuable. Before, it may have been a struggle to get it out of him, but he would readily confess it to her now. Maybe soon, of his own volition, when they’re in a hospital room and a baby is on the way.

Mary (HP) Neil. God, she thinks so fucking highly of him. There is no better man in her eyes, no better way of being. Aside from how hard he punishes himself by working until he’s damn-near dead, Mary absolutely thinks he is the ideal human being. Kind, generous, strong, intelligent, honorable, courageous, loyal, loves his family. She could go on and on about how many things there are to admire in Neil Lockewood. She absolutely feels that everyone is his inferior.

Evelyn (CoC) I know it says “something” my muse admires and not “someone” but AH WELL. Evelyn is a pretty... vapid, self-centered thing; admiration is hard to find inside her selfish, little heart. For Umbra Lui’s sake, she calls her orphaned and prematurely-crowned cousin “leftovers.” lmfao If she admires anyone, it would be Malakai. He’s handsome, wealthy, a successful king at a young age. I think she would admire Afasa if she ever crossed paths with the man. Wealth, power, and a face worth swooning over; that’s what Evelyn admires.Claus (CoC) Those in power who do not abuse it. Caldreus is a good example. Though Caldreus often causes eye-rolls so hard that they hurt, Claus is a firm believer that he is a very good king who has never used his power unless it was for the good of those whose lives depend on his decisions. Ambition for one’s own-self and one’s own alone is abhorrent.Viviette (CoC) When one sticks to their guns. She can always find some admiration for a person who, even against all odds or rebuttal, remains steadfast in their belief or cause. Those who backtrack, who correct themselves even with good reason, are not well-liked by a queen who cannot be told anything other than what she already thinks.

☂ for something my muse wants to protect

Mary (Modern) Bailey. In any of her modern verses, no matter what her situation is, she wants to protect Bailey and whatever makes Bailey happy. For example, with the whole issue of Don being too old for her (and the last person her parents would want her with): Mary immediately offered shelter from the storm. She wants Bailey happy because Mary knows that out of everyone in the world, Bailey deserves it most. Mary would throw down everything to protect her best friend. NOT HAVE FEELINGS FOR. Because Lord knows that if any kind of authority got wind of it, or if those relationships were made public... all hell would break loose, and Mary might just kill herself.

Velius (Main) Himself. Looking out for number one, always. Whatever he wants, loves, admires, needs, etc., Velius comes first.

Viktoriya (CoC) Gael and Giselle, her adopted family. She owes them so much, and although her mere existence is an insult (as her true identity is bound forever with tragedies that befell them both), she would give anything (or do anything) to see them safe. 

Eudora (CoC) Her last family member, Zosime. While Eudora has a large heart, there is no one who consumes it more than her big sister, Zosime. Eudora only ever wants to see Zosime happy and healthy, and anyone who would jeopardize that would be met with (probably futile) resistance.

♨ for something that relaxes my muse

Eli (Modern) Pot. Honestly, getting high. Xanax sometimes, but mostly he likes to smoke. Alcohol is more of a party choice. Oh, and “Friends” (the show). Pot and “Friends.”Wallas (HP) He loves to sit and read magizoology books with a large cup of hot English breakfast tea in hand. A good pair of pajama pants, soft robe, and we’re in business. Absolute bliss.

Julien (HP) Laying in bed all day with his little wife. At least, he’s going to make her his wife as soon as the smoke clears and they won’t be bothered. But yes, nothing is more relaxing than laying naked or semi-naked in a tangle of silky sheets with her. They could just talk for hours, or say nothing at all, instead passing time by tracing delicate shapes with their fingertips on each others skin. Julien just wants to be with her, be comfortable, and not be bothered by the world outside. Before Bailey, he liked to smoke, to take an assortment of mild wizard drugs, and look at paintings.

Louis (CoC) Cooking, gardening, cleaning. I imagine servants have gotten frustrated with him many times because he insists on doing things himself. After a hard life of combat, court life, and protecting princesses from all that is out to get them... domestic life is sweet, quiet bliss.Viala (CoC) Gabriel time. When he can afford to sit with her in her tower, Viala is most at ease. She likes to lounge around and hum little tunes while playing (and most times, successfully tangling) his long, dirty blond hair. She likes it when he tells her stories, when he talks to her about the comings and goings of the court she doesn’t often get to visit.

[drink-n-watch]

  Remember when I was all excited about the fact that it was starting to get warm here? Well that’s all over now! It is hot and I mean humid and sticky and just plain old tough to breathe summertime in Montreal hooooot. I do have air conditioning. I’m not sure why I whine all the time. It’s just a thing we Canadians do. We complain about the weather. It’s our claim to fame. How are things in your neck in the woods, Crow?

  Also hot. Also sticky. Glad I recently got the air conditioning repaired. It’d be a real bummer without it. Wait. Why am I bold? I shouldn’t be bold! I stick out too much!

Oh, there will be spoilers.

And so here we are. Can you believe it’s been 4 months already? And we are now finally at the last episode of My Next Life as a Villainess: All Routes Lead to Doom! Now for me this was a show that started out real strong but lost its footing somewhere at the halfway mark. However, before we get into all that, let’s just quickly resume what the episode was about. Actually no wait before we even resume what the episode was about, Crow, is there anything you want to get out up front?

19,800 meetings seems excessive. Glad we didn’t have to sit through all of them! I’m talking about Catarina’s internal Council of the Wise-ish. They made an appearance in this episode! But seeing them again made me realize how much I missed them. Glad we got to see that 19,800th meeting.

You know what’s always a great sign? When the series decides to, at the very last episode, bring in a whole new side plot with dramatic history to develop. I’m not really sure why we had to bother with the whole Sirius side. Actually, it was kind of worth it just to get the pronunciation of his name down though. This said it was over really quickly and it all seems a bit inconsequential now.

Oh, when you “great sign,” you were being sarcastic! I was momentarily confused. But it’s all good now! 

As you may remember, last week, the episode ended on a cliffhanger as Catarina and the gang were about to burst into Sirius’s house just as he was getting consumed by the darkness. Well, this week picks up right there. First, we get Sirius being all like gwaaahhh things are going all wrong. Then we quickly find out through flashback, that Sirius is not in fact serious. Sirious’s mother was a maid who was raped by her master and gave birth to a kid, but then the Master’s wife kidnaped them both and murdered the mother in a Dark Magic Ritual to stick the soul of her own dead kid into not Sirius, whose real name is Raphael and Sirius is the name of the dead kid but the thing didn’t work out and Raphirius only got the memories and he’s just been pretending that it worked all this time so that he could get revenge on the Dieke family who killed his mom. Cause they’re huge Diekes. I’m not sure why he wanted revenge on Caterina or what that was about but you know, I’m sure he had very good reasons. Anyways it doesn’t matter cuz Caterina says his real name out of the blue for some reason and now he’s all better and doesn’t want revenge anymore and all the PTSD is gone. Hurray! That was just the opening act of the episode though…

Now, to be fair, it was only almost all gone! The Entity Within made a “surprise” attempt to come back! But the Power of Friendship banished him. Either that, or not-Sirius was just happy to be holding Catarina’s hand.

 And then everybody goes back for a party at school because it’s graduation time. Caterina is right back to worrying whether she’s going to be all doomed so she decides to finally just ask Maria who she wants to… Let’s say… date. In response Maria confesses to Caterina and then everybody else confesses to Caterina and then everybody’s happy then they go to another room and have some more tea and cake because, I mean growing bodies, they need to keep hydrated and sugared up, and not Sirius comes back in and he also confesses to Caterina and everybody lives happily ever after, the end of the series…

Um…spoilers…

I got your back! Mentioned the danger of spoilers earlier. Though really, things went pretty well as expected, so maybe we’re more confirming things than spoiling them?

Is there a difference?

Speaking of growing bodies — did it seem like Catarina was, let’s say, more mature than even just last episode? Just what kind of sweets is Maria feeding her? Maria could build a fortune for her own family if she marketed it!

You always like your busty ladies. She was back to normal in her usual dress, just standard fanservice, I think.

I’ll be honest, although I did not dislike the Black magic plot, I also just feel like it belongs in a different story. It didn’t really, for me, mesh with the rest of the series. And that backstory of Sirius’s was deeply deeply tragic, yet it had this weird cheery music going on. It was all kind of uncanny. The tone was off, the pacing was way too abrupt and it just didn’t add anything to the light romantic comedy we’ve been watching for all these months. What do you think Crow? Did you like it as is, or do you think like me that it wasn’t bad in any way, it just would have been better in a different story that had the same sort of themes and tone that it was going for?

I like how you put it — that it would have been better in another story. It might have worked here if more of it had been foreshadowed, even thematically, earlier. But as is, I agree with you. It felt grafted on. In contrast, how Catarina brought him back was completely consistent with the rest of the show. She basically said that she wasn’t the heroine, so she couldn’t save him. Then she explained that “all” she could do was stand by his side, listen to him when he wanted to talk, and try to cheer him up. Which is to say, “save” him. The baka was strong with this one!

I wonder if there’s a discussion to be had on how Catarina’s view of herself as a villainess contributed to her baka-ness?

I reread some of the things I had said about the series in the first episodes and I was a little sad.  After episode one, I distinctly said how excited I was that Catarina seemed to break the mold of the usual otome heroine. She was a little dorky and a little clumsy sure, that’s a romantic archetype that’s super common, but she was also resourceful. Right off the bat she figured out what her situation was by herself, analyzed what danger she was likely to be in based on her own knowledge, and did so really well I should add, then started to put together contingency plans in order to ensure that she would be able to be okay in the future. And she did that by herself and for herself. It was refreshing. I think I’ve said word-for-word that it was so great to have a heroine that wasn’t an idiot constantly relying on the men around her to save her.

I can’t deny that I’m a little disappointed the series turned around and made being an idiot kind of a defining trait of Katerina’s personality. To the point that even the characters in the story refer to her as such without hesitation. And the fans have nicknamed her Bakarina. Even Crow, who really likes the character, uses the Idiotrina nickname because it fits so well. And frankly, I really can’t see the Katerina we got in the last 6 episodes or so, coming up with all the brilliant plans and situation assertions as the Katerina of early episodes.

It does seem like a disconnect. Reaching deep to try to defend what happened (and it kinda hurts!), I could build on the idea earlier about her own view of herself as the villainess degraded her abilities over time. Our abilities are often limited by how we view ourselves. Catarina perceived herself as the villainess who needed to do everything in her power to save herself. She probably thought she was selfish. Over time, that view narrowed her perception of what was possible. By the end, even when the whole harem clearly and concisely confessed their love for her, it wasn’t enough. Was she stupid? Or had her self-perception limited her so much that she couldn’t accept the idea that they honestly just loved her that much, and simply because she was herself?

Even after saying all that, did you notice that before the graduation party, the event that she saw as the final chance for doom to strike, she’d prepared? She had her toy snake, now perfected and looking completely real, ready to throw and distract Geraldo. She had her garden implements packed and ready. As narrow as she had allowed her perception to get, she was still fighting to the very end. It’s an echo of the full coolness we had earlier, but that little Catarina is still there, even if buried deeply!

 She’s still a very charming girl, but a much less memorable one as far as I’m concerned. The characters also went through a bit of arrested development which made me realize that I’m not sure why they all like Katerina. I understand why Keith does and potentially Alan. We legitimately see how her presence has affected them and changed them. But Geraldo doesn’t seem to have changed much. He’s different from his game counterpart, but he’s pretty much the same charming and commanding prince he was when we first met him. And Katerina has not been the nicest to him. I guess all the girls fall into the “because of the you were nice” trope. Still, it’s a bit thin. And Nicol likes her because she’s nice to his sister? It’s not that there’s no canon motivation given but we really don’t see it develop much, which is odd since that’s the actual core of the story. 

Of all of them, Geraldo’s continued affection seemed the most difficult to understand. Overall, it would have been more fulfilling had Catarina had chances to be good to them more after they entered school. As characters, they really did seem to stall. On the plus side, the show stayed true to its core concept: to the very end, Catarina struggled against her doom, and that was kinda cool.

I still really like those early episodes, I think I’m going to rewatch them.

I noticed that Katerina didn’t end up with anyone (although I suppose she still is engaged). I thought that was kinda cool. I guess very few harems end up in couples but I’m o.k. With that. How about you Crow? Did you want to see a couple form? Who?

Only in my imagination! I still think she and Mary would be a good match. Though maybe I’ve been affected my anime to the point where I wonder, why don’t they all just live together? It’s not like there’s no historical precedent! Well, in this world, anyway… A show where they have to work through the social expectations and legal biases might be fun. I mean, how would you figure out who inherited what estate, if everyone’s mingled? 

Will you be watching a season 2?

I think so! I still like the characters, and honestly, I’m curious to see where they’d take the plot. The core concept’s gone. The game’s over. Where’s it go from here?

What about you?

Like you, I’m curious what’s left. I guess it depends on what direction they take.

Well there you have it folks. My Next Life as a Villainess: All Routes Lead to Doom is all said and done. I hope you all had a good time with the show despite whatever flaws it may have had. Are you gin to be watchin a second season?

My Next Life as a Villainess: All Routes Lead to Doom! ep 12 – Finale Remember when I was all excited about the fact that it was starting to get warm here?

[heyheydidjaknow]

Alright, so I'm not actually finished with this, but I'm half asleep and that makes it difficult to write or edit properly. I owe you a chapter, though, so until I can write coherently, here ya go. Not even gonna tag this yet.

Chapter 14

“I trust you won’t be creepy.”

“I’m thankful.” Yoshi runs his thumb along the rim of his cup slowly. “You have little faith in me, as I understand it.”

You try not to be disrespectful. “Well, things in your life could’ve gone better, right?”

He seems to consider this for a moment. “I suppose so.” He takes a slow drink. “Mistakes from my youth have led to many hardships. Still, though the road has been a long and strenuous one, I would not want to change my past.”

Your untouched drink is cradled in your hands. “You don’t regret anything?”

“It is a foolish and maddening thing, longing for a life unobtainable to you.” He closes his eyes, your own scanning the walls for the photograph you know is in some nook or cranny. “Besides, if things hadn’t happened the way they did, I wouldn’t have my sons.”

You can understand, intellectually, he does not mean to be—and likely is not— as arrogant as you perceive him. Still, something about the way he sits, the way he speaks, even how he looks at you now makes you feel painfully inferior, as if you reacting the way you are makes you somehow beneath him in more than a literal sense.

You decide against arguing the point, eyes flickering from the shrine back to the man in front of you. “I guess that’s true.” You know you are not going to drink any of what he has offered until you have to. “And you’ve always thought like that?”

He nods. “It was what I was taught.”

Nodding, you look back down at your cup, a deafening stillness settling between you two. ‘He convinces me to come here,’ you grumble silently, ‘and all I get for it is a lecture and an awkward silence.’ You look back up at him, setting the clay vessel on the ground and pulling your knees to your chest. ‘I could be doing something else, like fixing my shirt or something.’

“Speaking of them,” he continues, “Donatello tells me you have been experiencing night terrors.”

‘Snitch. Did he tell me he told him?’ “You don’t?”

His eyebrows rise. “Sorry?”

“We have the same trauma,” you explain simply. “Both our families died in fires we caused. Think that counts.”

He does not even flinch. “I’ve never thought of it that way.” He smiles softly. You want to punch him in the face. “I suppose so, yes.”

“You seem pretty calm about it.”

He chuckles at your expression. “I’ve had fifteen years to come to terms with my loss,” he takes another drink. “And,” he jokes, “I was often simply too exhausted to have nightmares back when the wound was fresh; caring for four young boys is tiring, you understand.”

“Right.” You crisscross your legs in front of you. “Yeah, the makes sense.”

“Having said that,” he continues, voice lowering, “I can’t imagine going through what I did at your age.” He sighs. “If something like that happened to one of my boys at this age, I can’t honestly say how they would cope.”

‘Poorly. I’d guess they’d cope poorly.’

“I understand that you and I have differences in ideals and morals.”

“You could say that.” Your mouth stretches into a wry smile. “I honestly only started hangin’ with and helpin’ y’all as a way to make up for my manslaughter. With this exception, I live by the adage, ‘Not my circus, not my monkeys.’”

“As I said,” he covers his mouth to hide his amusement, “we differ in that respect. I take it that’s why, when Donatello explained the situation—” you break eye contact—“he was unable to explain in any sort of detail what they were about.”

“Not his circus not his monkeys. ‘Sides,” you shrug, “he was already being really caring and understanding, and I was already sobbing my eyes out, which I’m sure he already told you, so.”

You stare down at your tea. “Are you going to elaborate?”

“Not if I don’t have to, no.” Your face heats up.

“Do you want my help?”

‘I hate this,’ you squirm. “Honestly, I wouldn’t be here if Donnie hadn’t asked me to.”

“For someone who believes in leaving people to their own devices,” he notes, “you seem to value the requests of my son a great deal.”

Your knees are back up to your chest. “He’s important to me. He’s been there for me. It’s the least I can do.”

He takes a beat to gather his thoughts. You brace yourself for a lecture.

“You care for him, then.”

You nod once, treading carefully.

“Romantically?”

You still do not look at him directly, staring instead at the gorgeous screen door. “I dunno.” Your fingernails scratch at the surface. “I’m not exactly in my right mind, you understand.”

“I can’t say I do.” A pause as he takes another drink. “Then again, I’ve only felt for one woman all my life.”

“Look at that,” you try to joke. “Another difference between us.”

“Do you mind letting me in, then?”

“A little,” you admit, “but I will since there isn’t really a point to being here if I don’t.”

“That’s the spirit.” You can hear his smile.

You set the cup down again, glancing up at him before fiddling with the laces on your shoe. “People under stress and without anywhere else to turn tend to latch onto the first people they relate to,” you explain, practicing your knot tying with fumbling fingers; there is no harm in practicing your dexterity. “He was the first guy I met after I died, got kidnapped, and almost got killed by a giant vine creature. I like him,” you clarify quickly, “I really do, but it’s hardly fair to pursue that sort of relationship, especially considering everything going on with the Kraang and Shredder.” Your eyes go out of focus. “We get along great,” you mumble. “He’s sweet, kind, generous, and empathetic. He deserves to make sense of his feelings properly without me muddying things up with my possibly trauma-induced attachment.”

“So,” he clarifies, “it is not that you aren’t in love with him, but, instead, you’re worried for his sake?”

Your face goes scarlet as you choke on your saliva. “T-that’s a bit—uh—extreme, isn’t it?” You rub the back of your burning neck. “I’m not even sixteen, Yoshi. You don’t understand love properly at sixteen!”

“I fell for my wife at thirteen,” he smiles. “It’s certainly not impossible.”

“That’s—look,” you protest, “that is entirely besides the point. The point,” you state, “is that is completely irresponsible for me to pursue a relationship with your son. Frankly, I’m surprised you don’t agree.”

“He cares for you. You know that. Who am I to decide who he does and does not pursue, especially when that person makes him happy?” He reaches for a worn kettle sitting between you two on a table, pouring its contents back into his teacup—you remember Leo telling you that it is technically called a yunomi. “I find love typically does no harm so long as it does not consume you. Moderation is key.”

You look up at him. “So, you don’t have any reservations about it?”

He takes another drink. “I wouldn’t say that. He is my son, after all. In truth,” he admits, “I was more concerned that my sons would never experience what I did than anything. Given the circumstances of our existence, I’m sure you can understand my wish to give them a relatively normal, happy life.”

You sigh. “I guess, yeah.” You adjust your blanket again. ‘Seems counterintuitive, teaching them the art of murder, but I guess that’s his normal.’ “That’s just a general good parenting thing though, right? I’d hope you’d want that even if you weren’t a giant rat and they weren’t anthropomorphic turtles.”

A parent. He is talking to you like one might speak to their kid.

“I suppose so,” he nods. “It’s been difficult, but we’ve certainly come a long way over the years.”

The screeching of tires pierces the still air, the chattering of his four sons bouncing off the concrete walls.

You strain to hear what they are saying. “I never noticed that there was an echo in here. It’s less noticeable than in the tunnel.”

“That’s by design,” he explains. “I’ve made something of an effort to dampen it.”

“Oh, that’s cool.” You set the yunomi on the table. You sigh, holding your breath and downing your now gross, cool tea in three quick gulps. “I hate to cut this short,” you lie, wiping your mouth with your sleeve and tottering to your feet, “but I’ve gotta check to make sure everything went smoothly on their mission and adjust my timetable accordingly.”

He nods, deciding not to point your tell out. “I won’t keep you, then. Would you like to borrow my cane?”

This is not the first time he has offered. You, of course, refuse.

“Oh well. I thought I’d offer.” He sets his cup down, staying seated. “It has been pleasant talking with you, Y/N.”

“Likewise, Mr. Hamato.” You nod once in acknowledgment, hopping over to the door and slipping out into the hallway.

Your stomach churns at the stench coming from the lab—you can smell a suffocating amount of oil. You lean against the wall, making a pointed effort not to eavesdrop and rapping your knuckles against the door. Their voices immediately lower to hisses and someone drags the door open.

“Hey,” Mikey beams. “We were just talking about you. Need somethin’?”

“Just is an over-exaggeration.” There is a considerable amount of protest as Donnie pulls him away from the door with an uncomfortable edge to his voice. “P-please, come in.”

A beaten DIY van sits pathetically on the subway track, not looking dissimilar to a burnt, crushed soda can from where you are standing. The once hot pink graffiti has most certainly seen better days, and you squirm at the thought of the sound it must have made if you understd the situation properly. Raphael, who you glance at out of the corner of your eye, looks similarly beat up. Of course, you are not going to say anything because you value your life.

You whistle, smiling incredulously. “So,” you try not to laugh, “I take it you took on the cucaracha.”

“Made it my bitch is what I did,” boasts Raphael. “Shot it with a laser.”

“Cool, cool.” You chuckle at his excitement. “You take care of the egg?”

Is there a better sight than watching the light in someone’s soul die? You would hesitantly say no. “The what?”

“Right outside the building,” you elaborate. “On the side of the road. Looks like a horrifying imitation of an orbee?’

He takes a slow, deep breath, holds it, exhales. “I’ll be right back,” he says calmly, and sprints out of the lair.

Michelangelo laughs. “Were you being serious or are you messing with him?”

“Serious.” You readjust the blanket, trying to subtly figure out how to breathe without being assaulted by the mechanical smell. “I won’t joke about that sort of thing. It’s cruel.”

He hesitates. “… speaking of, are you alright? I didn’t get to ask before.”

The other two are quietly watching the interaction with an odd amount of intensity.

You shrug. “I guess. Probably.”

“Alright,” he nods. “Just lemme know if you need to talk, alright? Donnie’s no—ow!”

“Don’t talk bad about people in front of them,” Leonardo criticizes. “It’s rude.”

“You called him special, like, four hours ago!”

“The word of the day is hypocrisy.” Donatello puts his hand down.

“Hypocrisy’s right” You rub Mikey’s shell reassuringly. “To be fair, though, Leo could honestly probably just dodge it anyway.”

He leans into it. “I guess,” he grumbles, shooting a look at Donatello. “Favoritism.”

“It’s strategic favoritism,” the tallest brother corrects. “It’s to encourage parti pris.”

“Cronyism,” you tease, grinning. “You mean cronyism.”

“Hey, I’m plenty qualified!”.

You stifle a giggle as his face reddens, looking back over at the battered vehicle, raising an eyebrow.

“That was a team effort.”

“Yeah, okay, Hamato.” You blow a strand out of your face. “How long do you think it’ll take to fix?”

“A week? Maybe a bit less.” He looks back at it ruefully. “The spy roach completely jacked it.”

“Clearly.” You remove your hand, Mikey seemingly thoroughly comforted. “Then mind if I borrow a needle and thread so I can fix my jacket? I have school tomorrow.”

“Do you have the dexterity for that?” Leo crosses his arms across his chest absentmindedly.

“If I can hold a pencil,” you reason, “I can do basic stitching. ‘Sides, it’s only gotta hold until I get home.”

“I didn’t know you sewed.”

“I don’t. That’s why I’m asking now.”

Donatello pipes up again. “I really don’t mind—”

“Dude,” you reason, “you have to fix a whole ass van. I’ll manage.”

He pulls his phone from his pocket. “It’s a quarter to twelve. You won’t finish before midnight.”

“Then sucks to be me.” You shrug. “I’ll fix it here and walk home.”

He looks at you with a surprising amount of incredulousness. “It’s New York City.”

“You go out at night all the time,” you protest.

“I can carry you—”

Immediate panic. “Nah, I’m good!” You try to sound confident. “I walk home all the time, remember?”

“Not at midnight.”

“What’s a couple hours difference?” You would rather get attacked or kidnapped than fly over buildings again.

“A hundred-twenty minutes,” he states. “You know that crime is statistically more likely to happen at night, right?”

“That tracks. What’s different?”

“Violent crime peaks at midnight.”

Mikey butts in. “Why can’t she just go in the blanket? It covers enough.”

Donatello rolls his eyes. “Mikey,” he sighs, “she’s a teenage girl walking around with her torso covered by a single conspicuous quilt. Let’s use our heads here.”

It takes him a minute. “So you’re worried about her getting, like, attacked?”

It is at moments like these where you resent his honesty.

“… were you paying attention to any of the conversation? Or the lesson we just learned?”

“Dude,” he protests, “when do I ever?”

“What, you mean the one where y’all learned to face your fears or the one where talking about people in front of said person is rude?”

The bitter edge to your words is not lost on him. “Look,” he reasons with you, “I-I’m not saying you’re incapable of taking care of yourself—”

“You are, but that’s not the point.”

“Shut up, Mikey.” You are surprised he does not punch him, though, admittedly, you can hardly argue the point. “What I mean is that if you put yourself in harm’s way, you’re going to get hurt.” He nods at Leo. “He’s a really experienced fighter and even he gets overwhelmed if he goes out of his way to do something reckless and dangerous like Karai.” He spits out her name like it is poisonous.

“Since when have you had a thing against Karai?”

The eldest brother sighs. “I’m never living that down, am I?”

“Unimportant, and nope. Point is,” he continues, fingers twitching at his sides, “it doesn’t make sense to tempt fate.”

You open your mouth to argue. You close it again. He has an extremely valid point, all things considered, especially considering everything that has been happening, and although you are completely certain about your stance on him carrying you home, you would be lying if you said the idea of stumbling home without your walker or shirt sounds very appealing.

“Then what exactly are you suggesting?”

He looks off. “I’m suggesting she stays the night, Leo.”

Mikey blinks. “What, in your room or on the couch?”

“It would be up to her.”

That works for you. “Your home. You pick. Where do you keep your sewing supplies?” You slip out of the circle the four of you have formed.

“On top of the bookshelf,” he points. “Behind the cardboard box.”

You nod, hopping over.

Mikey offers his two cents. “It makes more sense for you two to share a room. It’s kinda cold in the front room, and you guys’ll probably end up going to bed at around the same time anyways. She also has your blanket.”

You stand on your toes, fingertips brushing against a plastic container.

“That’s a fair point.” You catch it before it cracks open on the ground. “Training starts pretty early, so she should have time to grab her things before school.”

“See? Foolproof plan.”

“Would Master Splinter approve?”

“Leo,” you call over your shoulder, “he’s slept over at my house twice already. I really doubt he cares.”

“But we don’t know.”

“Then you can go ask him.” You turn around. “Where’s the jacket?”

“In the cardboard box.”

You pull it down, taking your shirt and jacket and sitting down, crossing your bad leg under the one you can use, despite the nausea. ‘Exposure therapy.’