#Pretend I wrote something really good or wise

[betterthanbatman1]

He’s so pookie lookie mookie frookie tookie

[d1s1ntegrated]

hiii, 🧸 anon here!

i was wondering if you could write shig celebrating his s/o’s birthday hcs pretty please 🙏 it’s my birthday today & i lowkey just want love from him as my only gift hahah

thank youu ♡

happy birthday pretty babe! a fellow leo i see 🫶

and obv, absolutely i can!

shigaraki x reader!bday edition (some light nsfw ;) )

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shigaraki didn't typically care about birthdays. being raised by AFO meant that his birthday consisted of the same daily routine, trained to pretend it didn't even exist.

but after growing and living with the League for so long, he relearned the significance of them (mostly for toga, since she was so young. the older members wanted her to be happy as much as possible.)

your birthday, he learned, was today- and he was VERY ill-prepared.

he panicked and asked kurogiri to bring him out- explaining he NEEDED to spoil you

"tomura shigaraki, it would not be wise to be in public right now"

"i don't give shit. i'm getting them something."

scrambling, he consulted toga and spinner on what to get you. he got overwhelmed and ended up stealing a whole bunch of shit, unsure of what you'd want most.

he decided he was also going to try his damnedest to make you a cake.

quickly he faced the dilemma of not knowing how to bake. or cook at all for that matter.

"what's the difference between a dry and a liquid measure?? it's the same fucking thing!"

so with the help of a very clumsy twice and toga, you had a cake sitting on the bar top when you arrived. and a heaping of very poorly wrapped gifts.

shigaraki, sitting nervously on a barstool, biting his nails, gives you a very gentle and quiet "happy birthday"

there weren't a lot of words you could really muster the courage to say, so instead you kissed him and smiled.

he didn't protest it, but when you pulled away, he pointed at the pile and eagerly waited for you to open them

a headset was first- one that matched his.

"i knew you needed a new pair"

then a matching controller, plushies, and a switch game.

"you can use mine and we can play it together...if you want"

when you noticed the cake, you busted out in laughter and took a picture of it. but at that point, he couldn't wait any longer, and grabbed your hand.

"i have one more for you"

you were practically dragged into his bedroom, tossed onto his bed, and he shoved a small box into your hands.

in it was a little necklace, with a pendant with half of a controller on it.

he yanked at his shirt collar and pulled out a match, the other half of it, and nervously scratched at his neck as you put yours on.

"i love it" was the only thing you could say as you hugged him- for being so villainous, he really was a cheesy fuck sometimes.

once it was around your neck, he yanked you in by it and kissed you, tongue searching your mouth aggressively as he pushed you down into the mattress

"i lied. two more gifts" he whispered in your ear before wrapping you in his arms and rutting into you, making you see stars over and over again.

the cake was actually pretty good, too.

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:D again, happy birthday 🧸!! (i wrote this fast so i could get it out asap for u <3)

[abdy-18]

I thought about the parallels between Loid and Anya and it just occurred to me the possibility that, like Anya, [REDACTED] wasn't the best in school, which is why his father looks a bit surprised when he tells him he needs money for books, similar to when Loid is surprised to see Anya studying on her own.

I overthought this and now it's my first long post, sorry jkfhs.

Only, unlike Loid who tries to be empathetic with Anya and values her effort, his father used to be violent every time he didn't get a good grade on an exam.

His mother's reaction after he hits him is to say that “why do you always have to be like this?”, this situation must have been repeated several times and for several reasons, not just for playing war with his friends.

And that's probably why he didn't want Nightfall to be Anya's mother, because, being honest, WISE let Twilight rent a ridiculously expensive castle and made all the agents that were in Ostania drop the missions they were doing just because he asked for it, and he didn't even have to explain what he needed those resources for, considering that, I'm 100% sure that if Twilight had wanted Nightfall to be his wife in the operation Strix, he just had to ask for it and Handler would have given the mission Nightfall had at that moment to another agent so she would be available, but he didn't do it since he knows her, and knows that the teaching method Nightfall proposes is not going to work, because his father treated him like that in his childhood and knows how that feels (Twilight wants a world where children don't cry).

My hc is that [REDACTED] was that kind of kid who is very smart but didn't pay enough attention to school because he was sure he would become a soldier with his friends, or the stress of making his father angry had the opposite effect on his grades, making it difficult for him to concentrate, so he did not reach his full potential.

And it's sad because Twilight is so smart that he's on the level of someone like Yuri (or smarter), who unlike Twilight, was able to graduate from school and college with honors.

In one week, Twilight was able to read all the books necessary to pass himself off as a respected psychiatrist, he can hold conversations with his colleagues without anyone suspecting anything, and everyone at the hospital considers him a good doctor. Imagine what that man would be like if he had really finished school or gone to some university.

Unless on some mission Twilight had to pretend to be a university student, he hasn't been in a classroom since the war started, until joining WISE he must have had the academic education of a 6/8 year old, I feel like it would also fit this part.

Even with his limitations he was able to teach himself with books the knowledge necessary for his false identities, I assume that he taught himself since when the op Strix began we see him go to the library to obtain books about parenthood since his character "Loid Forger" is a loving father, so I assume he must have been like that with all his other characters since he was a rookie, although there is also the possibility that during training he obtained some type of academic education idk

As for Yor, I think she stopped going to school until a few years after being Thron Princess, she managed to resume her studies, but quite behind, so she ends up being a few grades behind Yuri and that's why he has to help her with the academic load.

I think that unlike Twilight she did manage to graduate from school because I don't think she could have gotten a job at the city hall without studies 😅.

Or I don't know, I think I'm overthinking this too much, I think I should go to sleep now 😅, also english is not my first languaje so let me know if i wrote bad something 🤗

[gildeddlily]

can I say something?

something I've started to not quite dislike, but not appreciate much about pjo was the way rick riordan talked about and characterized some gods- like Ares (still understand why he did that tho).

personally, as a kid who grew up reading myth after myth, I've always loved Ares, and when I re-read after years the pjo books some months ago I noticed how some of the gods are kind of lazy-written, or simply treated badly- as characters ofc.

one of them is Ares.

Ares is kind of impossible to appreciate in the books.

the only good moment he has is the "that's my girl" with Clarisse (but it still happened after years of neglect so yeah, not so great at the end), and then it's all bad, and he kind of gets ignored in favour of other gods- like Poseidon, who does mistakes but still can be appreciated, and is someone we could even relate too. Hades, Persephone, Hermes, Apollo and Artemis, they were we can say well-rounded second characters.

Demetra, Dionysus (except for the "protect my son" bit in the fifth book loved him for that and in general him with pollux and castor) but especially Aphrodite and Ares are just there so symbolize something Percy and us readers dislike.

(this is about Ares, but I could talk ab Aphrodite for hours (another day bud))

Ares is fucking cool.

he's the god of war, so unlike some of his other relatives his domain can never get weak, because humans are always fighting, there's always a war somewhere- but the way rick wrote him kind of erased the part where people prayed to him in order to not only beat someone and win a conflict, but also to survive one.

who attacked first prayed for Ares to help them, who was attacked and fought back prayed for Ares to make them survive and exit the conflict as winners, because there are always two sides in a war, and Ares represents them both.

but I can understand why rick ignored this part of him and reduced him to an extremely strong god who loves conflicts- and why, as a 11ys kid I didn't really got that. I was just sad that my fav god wasn't a cool guy. now I'm older, and I notice that, but still I don't blame him for writing Ares like that.

it's a kids book, and I can't pretend from it to be the greatest thing ever written, and I can appreciate these books with ease.

(and yk, war may be natural, but it doesn't mean it's right, so it's normal that a kids book characterised the god of war as someone despicable.

every god is despicable (as it should be, not so strange from the god of death to steal from earth someone young and all springy and trap them in his realm, it's kind of how life works!!!), but it's hard to explain kids how sexual assault and murder were their breakfasts and lunches, while war=wrong is easy and right! so)

but the show changed that?

it's changing a lot of things, but first of all it's dealing with things about greek gods that were ignored or set to the side in the books- the way it so heavily say, again and again, how the life they expected demigods to live was wrong.

but, honestly, I simply loved Ares.

not only for the twitter fights, but for his talk with grover mainly.

and even though grover said those things in order to manipulate him into telling him what he wanted to know- it was more than nice to see how they fixed and perfected an almost ignored character (in the books a strong, too prideful and not-at-all wise god).

can't what to see what they'll do with aphrodite my wife and pride!!!!

[gorogues]

Can we just discuss Len and the way he loves? I can't recall a lot of issues with Len and a woman he's interested in romantically off the top of my head, so I don't exactly know how to expand on this topic, but what I do remember is he turns into a lovesick fool who peacocks around and spoils his woman of interest with lavish gifts and other extravagant things.

I can't recall how many crimes he commits in his attempts to woo, but one of my favorite qualities about him is how historically (from what I remember) respectful he is of women. His little sister, making special rules for the Rogues, his love interests.

I just think it's really interesting for a 'villain' (I think he's more anti-hero, personally) to be written like that, especially when we have such possessive and extreme examples like Evan McCulloch and Eobard Thawne.

He's mostly respectful of women. I think his heart's in the right place, especially in the modern era, but he's definitely done some questionable things that most women would probably find a bit worrying…though that might just be a Silver Age thing we aren't cool with now but it was considered acceptable back in the 1960s. There was also a scene of him being creepy to Linda in Johns' first arc "Wonderland", but Johns promptly retconned a lot of "Wonderland" once he got the Flash gig (I believe that first arc was a fill-in), so he might have just pretended the creeping didn't happen. I'd be fine with that, as Len was a lot less thoughtful and more of a careless jerk in that arc than Johns wrote him later.

There was also a disturbing Bronze Age story I'm not entirely sure how to parse, in which Len had a girlfriend he adored named Myrna Troy, and she betrayed him by robbing banks in his costume while he was reformed. Which, I think everyone can agree, was extremely shitty of her. But he got really upset and tried to put the two of them into suspended animation for a few centuries, with obvious murder-suicide vibes (including a note stating "Farewell, heartless world!"), and I don't know if that's even canon anymore but it was a pretty messed up story.

But I think Len's made a concerted effort to not be like his dad whenever possible, and for that I applaud him. He seems to have problems with long-term relationships, which he acknowledged in the Johns era, and that was probably because his father was so abusive and his parents' relationship so dysfunctional; he didn't have good role models on which to pattern his own romantic relationships. But he was aware of this problem and decided to regularly pay for sex/companionship with Angie rather than get into a series of dysfunctional or abusive relationships, and that was extremely wise and respectful on his part. He clearly treated Angie with respect. He also respected Lisa's autonomy, even if he could be overly-protective of her at times…which is pretty understandable considering he was her protector and something of a parental figure when they were growing up.

So, like I said, I think his heart's in the right place even though he's flawed. He's aware of his problems and attempts to circumvent them, and he didn't have to establish rules about hurting women and children but that's an obvious sore point considering his childhood. He's doing his best despite the shit he's gone through and the damage it's done to him.

[guessimabasicnerdgirlnow]

Watched the movie!

Overall really liked it, but there is some stuff that made me mad. I want to talk a bit about it

(Spoilers below)

Two main things made me mad

The first was the ending, of course. I think that “and then all went back to Normal” is the dumbest possible ending to a fantasy story. I couldn’t even properly feel the intended sadness at V’s sacrifice because I was distracted by my hatred of this sort of ending

Not only that but they also killed almost every other symbiote? I shouldn’t have expected any different but damn it was disappointing

The second was that they did Toxin and Rex dirty

I get they got rid of Toxin because they needed an older space symbiote to give us the lore, but I hated it (the Wise Green One was lovely, though. I would trust them with my life)

As for Rex I really vibed with the fanfic I wrote in my head during his first scenes in which he was indeed just like comics!Rex and got involved in Area 51 to keep an eye on the other symbiotes. But nooo. They didn’t even let the man have one symbiote as a treat when everyone got one. I really love comics!Rex 😢

(If there was a sequel, I would foolishly hope for him to show up inexplicably alive and well because a symbiote saved him)

Also it didn’t exactly made me mad, but I used to not believe that queerbaiting was a thing that existed. After seeing some of the marketing for this movie I changed my mind

(Maybe it’s because I was so angry at the ending thing that I couldn’t feel the whole sacrifice thing as intended, but I felt that there was less chemistry between symbrock in this than in the last two movies?)

Now, for the good things:

Wow, we got a bunch of symbiote OCs! Those two that merged into a two headed symbiote, hosts and all, are possibly the greatest love story since Black Goo and Red Goo

We also got to see them actively trying to keep Knull in the cage! I don’t think we saw any other symbiote fighting against Knull in the comics

And they were all characters, despite having minor roles! When they spoke it was clearly them spoking and not their hosts. I loved it!

(Lasher’s host (because that one was Lasher, not the Wise Green One bonded to Patrick, fight me) and Agony’s host are lesbians, no one can take this from me)

The hippies, my beloveds

Eddie not being allowed to change his gross wet tshirt and being unable to keep any shoes

That one sticker saying something like “what did Drake bring back?”, love the worldbuilding. Conspiracy theorists probably had lots of fun with the whole thing at Life

Eddie and V both being good with children!

Mrs. Chen continuing to be the best

Knull. Damn it, Knull. He was perfect. I didn’t think they would show the whole story with the cage and the codex, I thought he would be active as leader of the symbiotes. I really liked the way they showed him. It’s a bit disappointing that he showed up like this in the last movie, though, because he remained a vague threat rather than an actual foe, and there won’t be a next movie to develop this (I know people are talking about crossovers already and there was that post-credit scene, but I don’t think it will be the same thing if he shows up in a different movie to fight someone else)

The visuals were so amazing. They didn’t hold back. The symbiotes were stunning. The visual representation of the codex looked really cool. Klyntar and Knull were epic. Even the xenophages and their creepy regeneration!

(The ending credits too! I think it’s my favorite in all three movies!)

So yeah overall I liked it. Already ignoring the ending and having Eddie and V instead do the first movie again in which V survived but pretended to be dead, Christmas kept Lasher and she and Teddy (with Agony) are happily ever after, Rex was saved by a symbiote, Toxin is happy with a nice host, and Anne and Dan had a baby 😉

[asherlockstudy]

Personally I'm not really sure what to think of their relationship anymore. It seems so blatant at times and not at other times. It is certainly very complicated and probably difficult for all involved or around it. I've never been able to read either of them as entirely straight and I won't apologize for that or pretend otherwise, but I'm also now out of the fandom. I've also recently privated the R&L fics I wrote in the past because if something does go down, those sorts of stories (even user locked to AO3) will get a lot of attention at some point, and I don't feel good about getting caught up in that possibility. Let's be real, there could be major scandal or blowback if any of this is true and comes out. Think Try Guys level of scandal. Maybe not as bad - but maybe so.

Agree. I think you have done a wise choice for your wellbeing - ensuring you are never getting caught up between all the reactions fans are going to have.

[afterdarkprincess]

Hi lovely 💕

For the sleepover questions:

- Tell us your Solo/Sami headcanons.

- Tell us your CM Punk/Drew headcanons.

- And for good measure please add your Sami/Jey & your Ambreigns headcanons as well while you’re at it.

FMK: Roman, Seth, Mox

FMK: Solo, Sami, Jey

FMK: Punk, Drew, Cody

FMK: Jade, Naomi, Bianca

FMK: Rhea, Liv, Becky

Questions, questions, questions:

- What’s an accomplishment/ thing in your life you’re very proud of?

- Name three things you love about yourself?

- What makes you furious in fandom spaces (your fandom pet peeves so to say)?

- Who was your first celebrity crush? Who’s your latest?

- Who do you adore on this website (aka tumblr crushes)?

- What do you find attractive in a person (physically and personality wise)?

- Favorite story you ever wrote?

- Favorite story someone else wrote?

- Your current favorite song?

- One ingredient/ dish you love and one you despise?

This or that:

- Cats and/or dogs?

- Coffee and/or tea?

- Hiking, cycling or swimming?

- Pizza or pasta?

- Mexican, Chinese or Indian takeout? Or something else?

- Cooking, baking or ordering in?

- Quiet night in or a night out socializing with friends?

- Cold weather or hot weather?

- Pants, skirts or dresses?

This got a little out of hand oops 😂

Feel free to answer whatever you wanna answer and skip whatever you don’t. Or answer everything. Up to you. Happy sleepover!

Hugs and kisses 💖

AHHH Thank you!!!!! I've been so excited all day to get home and hae time to answer these!!

Gonna answer under the cut because I'm sure this will be long lol 💖💖💖

💕Solo/Sami headcanons

I feel like a LOT of my headcanons on Solo and Sami come from one specific fic on AO3- The Solo Man

I love Solo as being selectively mute and/or very shy. I haven't really gotten to explore this with Solo in my fics very much, but I'm really looking forward to doing so.

I do feel like Solo has such a soft spot for Sami (I mean I have eyes) Sami was a real source of kindness for him when he really didn't have that from anyone.

💕CM Punk/Drew McIntyre headcanons

oh noooo my brainrot lol

They're TOXIC as fuck, they bring out the worst in each other. I can't find anything sweet or soft in them, it's obsession, it's raw, it's violent. Possessive and Obsessive.

And they fuck nasty obviously. I tend to prefer Bottom Drew, something so fun about subverting their size difference but I'll eat up anything.

💕Samijey headcanons

Ahhhh I just love them- I feel like a lot of my headcanons POP out in my fics. I feel like Jey Uso is an acts of service guy. I think he does anything and everything to make sure that Sami feels taken care of. This shows up really early on in Devil in the Details and uhhh fun fact I wrote the first part of that fic before I knew that Sami was vegan, hence why there are SO many references to Jey cooking chicken for Sami. It was too integral to how I was having Jey show his affection to take it out, so for that one fic Sami is just no pork not vegan lol

Sami talks ALL the time, and Jey pretends to be annoyed but the constant stream of consciousness is actually so comforting to him. He very rarely has to worry about what Sami is thinking or feeling because he will just tell him.

Jey cut those crop tops so Sami would look at him.

From You're My Keeper (Pull Me Deeper):

“You really like my waist, huh?” he murmured. 

As if to prove his point, Sami sank his teeth into the soft flesh under his bellybutton. “Can’t stop looking at it,” Sami whispered into his skin. “So fucking perfect. Those stupid crop tops are fucking killing me, dude.”

“Really? Hm, I thought so.”

Sami’s head shot up. “You knew?”

Jey blushed. “I guess, I kinda knew you were like… Looking. I guess I thought… Nevermind, this is fucking embarrassing.” He clapped his hands over his face. 

“You thought what?” He felt Sami tugging at his fingers, and Jey reluctantly let his hands get pulled away. Sami had the worst look on his face, smug and bemused. Didn’t he know this was absolute torture?

“I don’t know, I thought maybe if I cut the shirts shorter, then like… You know… You’d look at me more,” Jey pushed out through clenched teeth. Scratch that, this was the worst look. Sami positively beamed, fondness radiating out from him in shameless sunshine rays. If he was a dog, he’d surely be wagging his tail like a maniac. Jey tried not to linger on that thought too long.

“Jesus you are so fucking cute,” Sami wheezed, burying his face into Jey’s chest.

Literally one of my favorite fics ever- I reread it all the damn time. (If the author of this fic is on here?? let me know pls & I'll tag you💖)

And I do think that Sami/Jey switch up who tops and bottoms, but I'm always here for bottom!Jey, sweet pillow princess.

💕Ambreigns headcanons

OO this is a good one- I typically go for Ambrolleigns (bc they all have two hands) or Ambrollins because of my donut sister @elementaldoughnut12 I feel like where Dean and Seth have that very turbulent high passion love, Dean and Roman have a level of like rock solid devotion?? Someone that they can always rely on, coming even closer together after everything fell apart with Seth.

Even more than Seth's betrayal, Dean leaving spurred on the creation of the Tribal Chief. Roman, alone and brokenhearted, left by the man who he thought would never leave him, turns himself into something cold and cruel. Makes himself monstrous, surrounds himself by a cheap copy of what they had.

He wants Dean back, wants it more than anything, but some part of him is terrified that Dean will reject him, will detest what he has become.

💕Fuck, Marry, Kill

FMK: Roman, Seth, Mox

Fuck: Roman (I'm gonna need that tongue baby good lord)

Marry: Mox 100%, I'm gonna need to hit that multiple times, and also I feel like our personalities are really complimentary

Kill: RIP I'm so sorry Seth, please keep serving even in Death

FMK: Solo, Sami, Jey

Fuck: Solo- and he needs to bring the gloves okay? 🥵

Marry: Jey 🩵

Kill: Sami :( I hate to kill my hubby's hubby though

FMK: Punk, Drew, Cody

Fuck: Cody (he's hot, IDK that I'd wanna deal with him all the time)

Marry: CM Punk.... listenn

Kill: Drew- would need to take him out to marry Punk anyway

FMK: Jade, Naomi, Bianca

Fuck: JADE- HELLO?? PLEASE???

Marry: Naomi- Jimmy can come too

Kill: Bianca

FMK: Rhea, Liv, Becky

Fuck: Liv

Marry: Please, please Mami, I'm-PLEASE?

Kill: Becky, RIP girlie

💕Questions, questions, questions:

- What’s an accomplishment/ thing in your life you’re very proud of?

90k words posted on AO3 as of today has me feeling really good. I challenged myself at the beginning of the year to get to 100k by the end of 2024, but even where I'm at now... a year ago I would have laughed at you if you told me that. I've been writing in spits and spurts my whole life, but I really lacked confidence to do anything with my fanworks. I usually didn't even finish them. Before this last year, the most I had written was 2 NaNoWriMo attempts, both sat at around 25-30k and were never completed. And now with the all the support I've gotten here and on AO3, I've had the most creative period in my life. It makes me tear up thinking about it honestly.

- Name three things you love about yourself?

My passion, my sense of humor, and my tits lol

- What makes you furious in fandom spaces (your fandom pet peeves so to say)?

The only pet peeve I really have is like being rude and giving people shit for what they like and don't like?? Like I've been around since the days of Don't Like, Don't Read. If you don't like something, it's not for you, it costs zero dollars to shut the fuck up.

- Who was your first celebrity crush? Who’s your latest?

Oh gosh, so many. I mean the first would definitely be Tuxedo Mask from Sailor Moon 💖💖 Daniel Radcliffe when I got a little older and realized I wasn't going to be able to marry a cartoon. Right now? I mean all of those hot Samoans first of all. Rhea Ripley, obv. Moxley.

- Who do you adore on this website (aka tumblr crushes)?

EVERYONE lol this list is gonna be so long @feelschicken who has been my IRL bestie for like 20+ years at this point, who allowed me to drag her into Wrestling via several hour long conversations in the car where I would literally yell about the Bloodline

@elementaldoughnut12 my donut sister who has inspired so many of my fics and cheered me on through so much of this last year. Love you so much punkin 🥰

@harmshake my beloved tumblr gf, a constant source of positivity in my life 💖 Not to mention she writes the HOTTEST fics omg

@southerngirl41 who's been on the tag squad since the BEGINNING and I appreciate her comments so much

@jeysbvck Shan 💙 because we're both unhinged and feral for Jey- she just gets me

@imabillyami of course you too obviously- you are so sweet and not to mention your fics are amazing

@rollinsland who keeps my dash FULL of content of all my faves, and is so so sweet

@shanie-the-komania-toyaddict my Zowens connection, and another amazing sweet person

@motherknuckers I think we share a braincell for real

@samijey because like... A Way With Words is THE Sami/Jey fic, not to mention her amazing gif skills 😍

@thlayli-ra who definitely gave me the Punkintyre brainrot

@who-do-you-want-to-be MY SWEET KOALA FRIEND

@jeyuwuso WHOSE FIC I LINKED EARLIER, literally love all their work!!!

@taydaq her ART, especially Samijey 🥹

I know I'm missing people, I could be at this all night: @crxssjae @hypno-bear-tini @rosiel77 @mzv11 @theninthwonder @dontletme--cavein @codyswhitebelt @jobikinn if I missed others I'm so sorry 😭 and if tumblr messes up these tags I'll scream

- What do you find attractive in a person (physically and personality wise)?

Humor, they gotta be funny. They gotta make me laugh or we're not gonna work. We gotta be silly goosing.

- Favorite story you ever wrote?

Ours is still my favorite

- Favorite story someone else wrote?

oooo yay it's rec time!!! Already called out a few but here's some more:

Green - my favorite Candy fic

Losers and Loss - a Zowens fic that melted my brain into absolute goo I said The Solo Man already but also Pretty which spurred on my love of bottom!jey and Jey in pretty lingerie

Sticks & Stones and also Green-Eyed Monster - both by the Zesty Bean, all of their works are great but those are my favorites

Silver Knight and Little Clover - my donut sister knows how to make a rarepair that I'll go nuts for

And I could not forget I've got you to lose ... of COURSE 💕 maybe gimme a heads up before you post that last chapter so I can get all my favorite snacks and be prepared.

- Your current favorite song?

Guilty as Sin? - Taylor Swift

- One ingredient/ dish you love and one you despise?

Oo good question- I'm a big fries and ranch girlie (the midwest in me popping out) and for despise??? mmm it's gonna be pickles, they're gross to me.

💕This or that:

- Cats and/or dogs?

Cats 🐈

- Coffee and/or tea?

Coffee ☕️

- Hiking, cycling or swimming?

Swimming 🌊

- Pizza or pasta?

Pizza🍕

- Mexican, Chinese or Indian takeout? Or something else?

For takeout specifically it's gonna be Chinese

- Cooking, baking or ordering in?

Cooking!

- Quiet night in or a night out socializing with friends?

I love a good night out once in a while, but I prefer a night in

- Cold weather or hot weather?

Hot weather ☀️

- Pants, skirts or dresses?

DRESSES 👗

---

whew.... that took a while but it was so fun honestly 😅

[hello-nichya-here]

There is such a strange obession with always having to humble Michael Jackson.

He fits like the extrem case of a Tall Poppy Sydrome.

1# His brothers (Jermaine) how they say he wouldn't be Michael Jackson without the Jackson 5. Kind of dismissing his talent and wanting them to be a part of his success.

2# People who claim Joe beat talent into Michael. And is success is thanks to his abuse. If that was the case. What went wrong with the others then?

3# The constant comparsions with todays artists. Who not only benefit from the streaming era but are also way below him talent wise or impact wise. Taylor Swift, The Weeknd, Bruno Mars, Drake, Chris Brown... Them naming new King of Pops like Justin Timberlake, Justin Bieber, Ed Sheeran, Harry Styles. The comparsions can be looked as a compliment that he is looked as the standard or as an insult because they try to dismiss him and put him om the same level as these artists not respecting he is a league on his own..

#4 These stupid lists billboard or rollingstone put out ranking him ridiculously low. Like tf you mean Michael number #86 on the best singers list. Or the 20 best Halloween songs doesn't involve Thriller eventhough it's the most recognizable one.

#5 Claiming Eagles Greatest Hits was the best selling album of all time back in 2018. Eventhough it was only in the US. ( allegedly) But of course these trash tabloids had to make it look like it was the world.

#6 The stupid allegations. If they put any effort into reading would know are bs. When their smear campaign failed they just made it look like "separating art from the artist" bs.

#7 Them reporting other artist broke his record. Eventhough it isn't comparable. You can't compare Drakes shitty number ones who are mostly features in it or he features in them to Michaels number ones where he is mostly on his own and also wrote most of it. The songwriting is also something they can't believe and try to dismiss aswell. Also Drake has the benefit of the streaming era. Michael didn't. Aint nobody buying a bus tickets to drive 15 minutes downtown and purchase an album of Drake.

Their pathetic attemps really knows to bound. They would literally choke if they just admit he is the greatest.

The one about his father's abuse being the thing that "made him what he was", as well as the unfair slander against MJ for accusations that were so ridiculously they were laughed out of court are, by far, the ones that piss me off the most.

Joseph abusing his son was not the reason why Michael was the greatests, it was one of the many reasons why we lost him so soon. I'm always EXTREMELY suspicious when people try to push that kind of narrative of "abuse is not that bad and has positive consequences if you're not a crybaby", especially when it's someone in a position of power, because it just screams "I want to get away with exploiting people AND I want to be praised for it."

The lies of "Michael was a pedophile" are just the kind of stuff that breaks my heart and makes me furious. And I gotta laugh when the same people that tried to destroy MJ because of stuff they KNEW was bullshit now pretend it never happened or, like you said, use the "separate art from the artist" argument. It just proves that Michael had earned so much respect from both the public and the few decent people in the industry, AND was so fucking talented, that those idiots were eventually forced to realize that they would have made much more money celebrating him than they ever made by tearing him down

And we all know THAT is why they did it, the good old business model of "Give the public a great icon, then tear said icon to pieces in front of them." The people that are still on the hate/devalue MJ train are split between people that are too proud to admit they fucked up, and the people that built their entire lives around telling the public which popular thing is actually not that good (be it in a "I'm too good for stuff that the masses like" way or in a cancel culture type of way).

Plus, we all know Michael was not afraid to openly trash the media and even his own record label when they pissed him off enough, and you just know some rich assholes that are not used to people talking shit about them and getting away with it and still hold a grudge for it.

As for the comparisons with modern idols - it's not just things like streaming that make said comparisons not just unfair, but downright nonsensical.

The very fact that people will go "Oh, this person is the new Michael Jackson/King Of Pop" is already a contradiction. The reason Michael has the status he has is because there WASN'T a "king of pop" before him. He had people who influenced him and there were artists that were HUGE, sure, but there was no one that fit the role of "The MJ before MJ" so to speak. The closest "match" I can think of is Beatle Mania, and even then, that was a group. Even when people talk about the "most important/famous" Beatles, it's always Lennon AND McCartney.

Michael Jackson's fame as a solo artist was on the level of "People legitimately did not fucking know someone could be this famous" and to this day nobody has done it again - which is a big deal since, like you pointed out, it is a lot easier to have acess to an artist's work now.

And yet everytime one of today's artists is called "The new king/queen of pop" in some internet article it just never catches on... yet the title of said articles DON'T have to add a "(Michal Jackson)" after saying the words "King of Pop" because if you know these three little words, you know the ONE person they refer to.

Another important factor here is that all of these "new coronations" so to speak happen literally every year - to more than one artist. We are TOLD "this random music critic saying this about this artist is a big deal" but it doesn't match what we're SHOWN because, again, to reach Michael's level of fame, one would need to be literally "The only artist that matters, everyone elsa can just fight for the title of second best." If everyone is "the new MJ" then no one is, not really. At most they're just "Super popular artist" and there's nothing wrong with that.

Things like the internet and streaming have also made the term "fifteen minutes of fame" much more literal than it ever was. So sure, you easily find people that went viral - but how many of them had any real, lasting sucess? How many times did an artist do something cool that pushed to everyone all over the globe, and then just a month later they were a has-been?

And even the well-stablish artists of today, even though who started really young, don't have the same kind of long career Michael had because most artist don't start singing at the age of five, spend their entire childhood and adolescence gaining more and more fans, and then spend their adulthood as the biggest thing ever because they put out the first AND second best selling albums of all time. Michael had already been performing, and been absurdly famous, for nearly two decades when he finally released Thriller - which just got a 40th anniversary edition because even after four decades since it's debut, and 14 years since Michael letf us, he is STILL such a powerhouse that the world just had to celebrate his music once again.

Comparing that to artists that have only had one or two decades in the industry is ridiculous because of course they're gonna lose, just like their modern songs are obviously going to be front and center instead of the ones made decades ago, from an artist that is deceased and whose sales did not benefit from streaming, or even CDs, for a long time. And once again, the fact that Michael STILL has a presence on Spotify, Youtube, TikTok and literally very platform ever speaks volumes of just how solid his legacy is. Meanwhile all these singers he's being compared to are still making stuff that will one day become their legacy. It's comparing apples to oranges.

And since I mentioned the (ungodly evil thing) that is TikTok, that brings me to yet another major difference between MJ fame and modern fame: how artificial it all has become. Don't get me wrong, musical trends and popular "formulas" to make a hit have always existed, but things today are often SO calculated to have "viral qualities" (a part the is guaranteed to become popular on TikTok, never going over a specific length, everything needing either a sped up version or a slow reverb version, etc) that they might as well have been made by algorythm.

Meanwhile, Michael became the biggest singer ever because the priority when making anything was to make sure it was GOOD, no matter the style, length or topic of the song. Michael often said his approach when making records was to have no songs you can skip - compare that to artists and labels trying to make 20 seconds of a song catchy to blow up on TikTok, rest of the thing be damned, and you have yet another reason why MJ's legacy is solid, while plenty of promising new artists disappear overnight.

And, finally, we that brings us to the final difference between Michael and plenty of artists today: how he COMPLETELY altered the industry, in every way.

Michael Jackson is the reason why Superbowl performances are a thing, why music videos have all kinds of cool aesthetics and even enough plot to be considered short films instead just being an artist dancing to their own tunes on camera. He was the first black artist to ever have his music videos air on MTV. Fans passing out during his concerts was a regular thing. Plenty of artists all over the globe have him as a reference to how they should sing, dance, dress, or even just stand on stage because Michael had such presence he could stand on stage without moving for an entire minute then slowly, dramatically remove his sunglasses, and people would still be screaming their heads off.

Once again, let's look at Beatle Mania: it was a level of fame nobody had seen before, for artists that were breaking all the rules. But nowadays a group of young men playing love songs and having seemingly every teenage girl in the country following them around is nothing out of the ordinary, and while their songs are still fantastic, plenty of bands over the decades have done awesome things with rock music that are just as revolutionary, if not more.

Meanwhile, Michael is still THE reference, and his music is still the definition of "quality." If you hear his biggest hits, you can totally tell which bits modern singers were inspired by - yet if you didn't know who he was, you could wrongfully assume some of these songs are modern because they were SO ahead of their time they still sound groundbreaking today.

Seriously, there's a reason NONE of these artists that was ever compared to Michael tried to actually claim his title: saying you're as good as him is one hell of a bold claim that gives people a ton of impossibly hugh standards that you better meet, without flaw and making it look effortless, otherwise you look like the most arrogant person who has ever lived - and nobody wants to deal with that kind of pressure.

[hiswordsarekisses]

Amy wrote this a very long time ago. And it’s still true today. Fear is dominating so many lives. I was just reading a book from 1957, the year I was born, about how much fear was in the world. And here we are in 2024.

And everyday, something will remind you that you should fear something and you aren’t being anxious enough.

But…..life is also wonderful.

Jesus is still sovereign.

God is still good. The Holy Spirit still does miracles.

True Love will never lose its powerful.

Beauty is still everywhere.

So quit getting so grounded in the garbage, you miss the love, joy and peace of God.

It’s available to everyone!

Constantly, every single day, I’m seeing that climate of fear, keeping so many from freedom and joy.

Recognize the distractions and patterns. Whatever it might be, the anxiety will rise.

The anger, the grief, the despair, the power of the Adversary can taunt our faith.

He will use us, just like he uses others.

We can sound just as hateful, just as critical, just as sarcastic as those oppositional to our message of hope.

Watch this obsession with the

temporal world news, following after fear mongers instead of Jesus. Be wise, not bent on knowing it all. We who know God personally already know.

The world most likely won’t repent today.

But here’s the truth….

You don’t want to eventually be a difficult, sad, anxious, person with attitude, clouded vision, undone hope, negativity, who finds it hard to walk with God, to be filled with the fruit of the Holy Spirit, to be waiting

for a glorious return.

Everything and anything can keep you from living a victorious, grace filled, vivacious, joyful in Christ, life on earth. Yes, it can dominate your life. I’ve seen it on here. You can’t even talk right for the constant feed of fear you pretend not to see.

But….

If you let the noise of what you hear and the blinding of what you see, dominate your moment to moment, you are going to lose your blessings of the eternal: love, joy and peace faster than you can imagine.

Please don’t let living on earth dominate your eternal status.

This. Is. Not. Our. Home.

This ……is all temporal.

You know that if you know Jesus.

It’s subject to constant change and chaos. Don’t you think the Adversary uses the drama to keep us focused on earth and ourselves? He doesn’t want us to walk eternally. People will avoid us, and then where will our opportunity to share the kingdom really go?

Jesus keeps us focused on what matters. That’s why He says to walk in the Spirit. You …..choose your domination.

Please be careful that in your need to know, to warn, to feel you know things nobody knows, to think yourself better, because you stay on top of the undergrounds, to be consumed by the latest tailspin, that you yourself are caught in it, unable to live in victory outside of it.

It’s a foolish idol.

Ask God to show you.

Deception steals from goodness of truth.

Absolutely ….know things.

Use your wisdom wisely.

We have an anchor.

We have a hope.

We have eternal life.

We need to share everlasting life.

Let us ask God to keep us balanced in the way we see the Adversary’s partying. Instead, let us devote ourselves to telling God’s truth. We can’t trust anything else.

Let us absolutely and relentlessly refuse to be dominated by what we see,

hear, or what steals from our peace, love and joy. If we truly believe God is in control, then it’s time to act like ….God is in control.

~Ann Stewart Porter

[hairstevington]

i wanna cut to the feeling (chapter 3)

Eddie Munson x Steve Harrington

Summary: Robin drags her best friend to a Corroded Coffin show. How were they to know sparks would fly between Steve and a member of the band? (aka, the fic where Steve fixes Eddie's hair before a show and falls in love immediately)

Word Count: 2.7K for this chapter, but it's an ongoing fic

Warnings: Everybody is a gay disaster, Hairstylist!Steve is a petty bitch, Rockstar!Eddie is a bit of a diva, Robin knows Steve too well, nothing crazy yet but I reserve the right to get crazy later

A/N: Here we go again, folks! I can't stop writing lol. Steve's jealousy in this chapter makes me laugh, so enjoy! PS, would anyone be interested in me creating fake lyrics to Corroded Coffin songs? As always, thanks for reading ❤️

Previous Chapter ~ Next Chapter

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“No way. Dude, that’s so fucking dope.” Eddie could not believe what he was staring at. “Guys! Come see this!” He gestured for the others in the band to come closer to him and this fan - Bri, that was her name - who had gotten a Corroded Coffin tattoo. She had an actual, permanent, badass tattoo about Eddie’s band, and that was the coolest thing that had ever happened to him. A tattoo? Hooooly shit. “Thank you, we are so honored.”

“You’re welcome,” she responded. “The song just meant a lot to me, you know? Like, I don’t know exactly what you were going through, but it’s so universal I think.”

The tattoo was a reference to one of the band's earliest songs, ‘86’  - written entirely by Eddie his senior year. He was flipping burgers at the time, which was totally humiliating, by the way, and they used to always use the term 86 when something ran out. Anyway, at that point in his life he felt rejected quite a bit. Left out. Eighty-sixed. You know? 

It was probably their softest song, sound-wise, but that didn’t mean it was less angry than their other music. In fact, it was one he wrote while he probably felt the most angry, or hopeless at least. They hadn’t played it tonight, because it didn’t match the vibe, but it was one of his favorites.

And this girl, Bri, had a tiny 86 on the inside of her wrist. She had lots of tattoos, actually. He noticed one on her collar bone of a slice of watermelon.

“What’s this one for?” he asked, curious.

“I just really like watermelon,” she replied. 

Eddie smirked. He kinda liked this girl.

-

“Tattoos are so cool,” Robin sighed, staring wistfully at her future date. “I wish I had one.” 

“You can get one, you know,” Steve responded. “Oh, right. You do know, because of the time you dragged me to a shop and got all the way to the chair just to panic and run out of the store.”

“I thought we agreed to never mention that again.”

“It was relevant,” Steve shrugged.

He watched Eddie interact with Bri, like he was smitten or something. Steve wondered if that’s what he looked like. He figured he held it together enough before in the dressing room, but now? He really had to keep himself restrained. 

This is fine. Pretending he didn’t like guys was something he used to do all the time. Eddie smirked at something she said, and ran his fingers through his beautiful hair. This is fine, god dammit. 

Steve couldn’t get a good read on Bri, despite the intrigue. She was facing away from him, so it was hard to tell exactly how she was feeling, but she seemed somewhat receptive to Eddie’s charms. It’s just that she had also just accepted to go on a date with Robin. 

Not that it’s bad for someone to accept a date and then flirt with other people. She was completely in her rights, and it didn’t really have anything to do with her anyway. With awesome, perfect, beautiful Bri who somehow had the attention of both Robin and Eddie. Fantastic. 

Eddie was fully enraptured in his conversation with her, now. 

Yes, okay, fine! Steve was kind of a jealous person! I mean, he had jealous tendencies. Or, more accurately, when he felt jealous he turned a little petty. If he had to have a bad quality, there are worse ones, you know? But otherwise, he thought he was a pretty good dude. He made decent money for a 24 year old. He was good at his job. He was loyal and protective, and he always tried to see the good side of things - tried being the key word there.

Eddie was way too good at flirting with these women, almost like it was nothing. How could he do that? Do the fans really mean that little to him that he’d just go after them all and wait for one to stick? It wasn’t the worst tactic, and it’s not like he was being disrespectful about it, but still. He was laying it on so thick it was insane. 

Ah, shit. It was none of Steve’s business. Eddie could do whatever he wanted with whoever he wanted, but Steve had the petty, judgemental thought anyway - Am I attracted to a fuckboy?

-

“Well, it was so great to finally meet you. Hopefully I’ll catch you at another show sometime.”

Eddie was impressed at how cool and collected Bri was. She seemed to completely respect his work, and even though she was a huge fan and had a Corroded Coffin tattoo, she didn’t come off like she had an altar at home dedicated to them or anything like that - although Eddie couldn’t deny he’d still think that was dope.

“Yeah, I hope I do.” He smiled at her, genuinely, without a trace of the fake flirtation he was so used to putting on for these women. She smiled back, then waved goodbye and took off, leaving only Steve and Robin in front of him.

“Well, well, well.” Eddie’s eyes narrowed, eager to find out how this conversation was going to go. “If it isn’t my knight in shining…polo?” He noticed Robin snort at his joke, but Steve crossed his arms, defiant.

“Fuck you, it’s a Cuban collar.” Eddie’s eyes widened in surprise, which was the first big reaction Steve had been able to get from him. It’s kind of what he was going for, despite the fact he was coming off a bit aggressive. “And I don’t own any shiny clothing, that’s tacky.” He allowed the corners of his mouth to turn upwards just enough to show that he was, in fact, being a dick as a joke. Robin shot him a suspicious glance, and he knew it was only a matter of time before she figured him out, like she always did.

Steve tended to act kind of mean like this towards guys he liked.

“Please forgive my friend, it’s well past his bedtime,” Robin chimed in, sending another quick glare in Steve’s direction. 

“I’ll let it slide since he saved my ass earlier,” Eddie replied. “Good to see you, Buckley.”

“You remember me???” Steve tried not to groan at how excited Robin sounded. He really needed to calm down. None of this was really a huge deal, anyways. It had just been a long day, was all.

“Well yeah, you were the only person in English class worth talking to. Come here, doll.” Eddie pulled a completely stunned Robin into a hug - this was two unexpectedly positive interactions with people in a row for her, and entirely unprecedented. Steve felt a pang of jealousy at the idea of Eddie having a crush on Robin, or even just him flirting with her right in front of him. Why did Eddie get no sass at the term doll when Steve was always yelled at for calling her darling? It was a stupid reason to be jealous, considering Eddie had no shot with Robin, and besides, why did Steve care so much about who Eddie flirted with anyway? They literally just met.

“So you guys actually…knew each other back then?” Steve asked, confused.

“Not well or anything,” Robin clarified. “We just had one class together my Freshman year. But yeah, Corroded Coffin started in Hawkins. How do you think I learned about them?”

“Shit,” Steve said, eyebrows furrowed. “I had no idea.”

“Seriously, where the hell were you in high school?” Robin asked, annoyed.

“I know, right? It’s not like my presence was subtle,” Eddie chimed in. 

“I was…busy, alright?” Steve had been dealing with his own problems back then, so he wasn’t really in tune with a lot of what was going on at Hawkins High. He knew about the sports teams, because he was on them. He knew who hosted the best parties, and who started the chlamydia outbreak senior year - that was a wild few weeks. 

“Yeah, busy being a douchebag,” she teased. Eddie burst out laughing, which pissed Steve off even more.

He didn’t know Robin back then, but she knew him, and she made it very clear they would not have been friends. But none of that mattered, because Steve matured a lot once the stupid teen pressure of popularity, social status, and the constant need to look cool disappeared. Robin was the one who initiated all that change, basically, when they worked together the summer after he’d graduated. The rest is history.

“Well, I’m glad you came out tonight.” Eddie did not make it clear whether by you he meant you in the singular sense, as in Robin, or you in the plural, as in you all - you both. 

Despite growing increasingly annoyed with Eddie and his stupid sexy hair, Steve obviously hoped it was the latter.

-

Steve was somehow both exactly what Eddie expected while simultaneously full of surprises. Perhaps it wasn’t Steve’s actions and words that were surprising, but the way they came off. Steve was actively being an asshole, just like he had been years prior, but this time it felt less obtrusive, and a whole lot more amusing.

Fuck you, it’s a Cuban collar. That was the most ridiculous sentence Eddie had ever heard, and Steve’s sincerity made it even better. 

It must have been hot in the pit or something - Eddie noticed Steve had unfastened the button closest to his collar (the one of Cuban variety, apparently - although Eddie had never heard that term before in his life). His hair was a little more disheveled, his posture more relaxed, and the way he talked to Robin was vastly different than the way he’d appeared to Eddie before the show, or how he’d ever looked back in high school. 

Ah, shit. Eddie sighed, unable to put the stupid thought away once it had been created. Am I attracted to Steve Harrington?

Eddie tucked that thought away to deal with later, because he sure as hell wasn’t going to let it ruin his fun for the night. It’s not like he never thought about Steve’s looks - of course he did. It’s that Steve had always been attractive. He had always been known to be attractive, by everybody. It’s part of the reason Eddie hated him so much. 

And it was supposed to be the loser’s turn now - Eddie’s turn - because he was finally starting to feel confident in himself and his looks, and he was finally starting to become successful. 

Everything was coming up Eddie Munson. 

Steve Harrington and his perfect arms were irrelevant.

Eddie was extremely pleased to see Robin doing well, however. She had been in the lower ranks of popularity with Eddie, even though neither of them were ugly people or anything. Now, she obviously had more confidence (even though she was still the same in regards to her nervous energy). She was wearing a crop top, showing off her midriff. Eddie didn’t know her too well, but most people could have deduced that she would never have had the courage to wear something like that in high school. Not that she’d have been allowed to, for stupid dress code reasons, but whatever. 

“Hey, man, you ready to head out?” Eddie looked next to him to see Jeff, and realized the rest of the band had already packed everything up while Eddie was busy talking to the people at the door. It was kind of a point of contention sometimes, between him and the rest of the band, that they always seemed to do the behind the scenes cleanup while Eddie got all the credit. But it’s not that he planned it that way - the fans were the ones who would make them famous, give them money. Eddie was basically networking, although it didn’t hurt that it stroked his ego at the same time. The band, however, were being all professional and shit, which was nice too but not super metal. They’d hadn’t gotten in trouble yet or anything, and that was all because of them. 

Which was good. But Eddie couldn’t foresee himself ever missing out on these interactions outside the stage door. Just the way it was. 

“Uh, yeah,” Eddie responded. He turned back to Steve and Robin. “You guys still down to come along?”

Robin nodded, enthusiastically, which was a reaction Eddie expected. He braced himself for whatever snark Steve was going to give him - maybe he’d even make some excuse about having to go home because it was sooo late or whatever - it was literally not even 9pm. 

But, yet again, Steve surprised him.

“Yeah, where do you have in mind?”

Eddie didn’t know why Steve was so down to go out still, because of the way he’d continued to look mildly annoyed the entire night.

And then he remembered the goofy way he was jumping around, singing earlier at the show, and he figured that Steve was somewhere in there still. And that Steve seemed like a good time. 

Eddie told them their usual bar that they went to when they were in the area, and they all agreed to meet there.

-

“What the hell is wrong with you? He was being totally nice, and you were acting like a jerk for no reason.” Robin was lecturing him in her tiny green car that she loved so much as they made their way to the bar Eddie told them to go to - neither of them had been before, but she’d heard of it from a coworker and it sounded like a fun place. 

“I know, I’m sorry. I’ll be better at the bar, I promise,” Steve said. 

“You better, because this is a really cool thing to have happened to us and I’m not letting you and your stupid romantic self-sabotaging tendencies ruin it.” 

“Oh my god, it’s a mildly cool thing, Robin,” Steve insisted, before processing the rest of her sentence. There was no point in saying, what are you talking about? Because he knew. They both knew. “And I only self-sabotage when absolutely necessary.” 

“That’s a lie,” Robin scoffed. “You’re getting special treatment from an actual Rockstar just because you were in the right place at the right time. Just submit to the fact that it’s awesome, okay?”

“Okay, fine!” Steve exclaimed with his hands in the air.

“So you have a crush on Eddie Munson,” she stated. Steve groaned at the words being out in the open. “What’s the big deal? We’re not in high school anymore, and Eddie’s a good-looking guy.” 

“First of all, it’s not a crush. I barely know him,” Steve corrected.

“I think you crossed into at least acquaintance territory when he let you cut his hair,” Robin replied. Steve thought about this, and couldn’t disagree.

“It’s also when I crossed into gay panic territory,” he admitted. Robin laughed, then nodded in understanding.

“Yeah, seems like an intimate thing. I don’t know how you’ve gotten this far without wanting to bang a client before.” 

“Robin!” Steve yelled, exasperated. “We’ve been over this. It’s -”

“Extremely unprofessional, I know. Steve, you have to loosen up a bit. You’ve gotten a little…” She paused, grimacing at the hole she’d put herself in. 

“A little what?” Steve waited patiently for her to finish. She sighed.

“I’m sorry,” she prefaced. “But you’re so focused on work nowadays that we don’t have as much fun anymore. And it’s kind of like…Well, like when I first met you.”

“Noooo, you take that back,” Steve snapped, shocked. He wasn’t upset with her or anything, he just couldn’t believe he’d ever get that bad.

“Think about it,” she responded. So he did think about it. He thought about all the nights he’d stayed in, how he’d become a bit of a Debbie Downer, how he’d become less open and more judgemental. It had even been a while since he’d called and checked in on Dustin. He sighed.

“Shit. I’m sorry, Robin.” 

“Don’t sweat it, just do better. Mmkay?”

He’d do anything for Robin, literally anything. So, he was going to be the most fun he could possibly be for the rest of the night. It was one drink, with a decent band, on a Friday night, and it was going to be fun, dammit. Minor crush on Eddie Munson be damned. 

It was just a crush, right?

(Next chapter)

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Taglist: @ofherscarlettwitchways @paintballkid711 @abraca-fxckyou @allbimyself26 @jellybabiesforall @allbymyselfexceptformycactus @justaloadofgarbage-blog @alliemunsonsstuff @thefruityfours @hobbitnarwhal @calivanus @wreckmyplans-thatsmyman @antheia @goodolefashionedlovergal @lillemilly @undreamingscatworld @missmagillicuddy @steviesbicrisis @gamerdano @menamesniall @eyeslikewildflowers111 @callmesirkay @stringischeese @eds-trashmouth @mnl-enuh

[ladylooch]

Letters in Your Last Name - Chapter 32

A/N: Wrote this chapter in 20 minutes. You never forget the little wins like that 🥰

Word Count: 4.1k

Warnings: SMUT 18 + Content, smidge of child birth- less dramatic than last time hehe.

Airplane seats were not made for women who are close to 7 months pregnant. That much is certain as I settle in to our first class seat, adjusting my hips so the baby settles into a better position. Although at this stage in pregnancy, there isn’t many “good” positions left. My husband plops down into the seat next to me with a huff. He’s been huffing and puffing all morning, but I refuse to let him blow down my vacation buzz. We are currently on our way to the Hilton Los Cabo resort for an extremely rare and short, season break.

“I can’t believe I let you talk me into this.” Kevin grumbles from beside me.

“It’s fine.” I say to him, not looking up from my book. It’s a historical fiction about a few badass women helping the Allies get an edge in World War II.

“I am literally going to lose my shit if you give birth in Mexico.”

“I’m not. I’m giving birth on January 3rd.” I say to him, reminding him of my already scheduled cesarean appointment. With Luca being an emergency c-section, our doctor recommended leaning towards delivering this way again. It’s technically possible to do so naturally after one these days, but we opted to pencil in the delivery of our next child. Ya know, for easy planning.

“Yeah, if you don’t go into labor first.” He snaps at me. I sigh and drop my book, looking at my husband.

“I’m over this attitude.” I swirl my hand in a circle at him. “You’re acting like I made you buy these tickets, pack your bags, get into the car, drop Luca at my parents, go through the airport, and get on this plane, all with your balls in a vice.” My ensuing look is pointed at him. He purses his lips at me and shakes his head looking away. “Choices, baby, have consequences like unprotected sex.” I rub my hand over my belly. “And the doctor cleared me yesterday to do this, so quit getting your panties in a bunch. Mama needs a vacation and to not watch The Little Mermaid for a few days.”

“Would you two like something to drink before takeoff?” The flight attendant interrupts Kevin’s response.

“Vodka?” Kevin asks and I click my tongue at him.

“How about sparkling water? For both of us. With limes, please.” I narrow my eyes at my husband.

“I need a drink, Sam. I’m seriously concerned that we are going to get to 30,000 feet and your water is going to break.”

“Kevin. I’m pregnant, you’re not. Our daughter is sitting on my bladder right now, not yours. So your feelings are invalid. Now, shut up.” I hiss at him. The flight attendant gives me a knowing look and stifles a giggle.

“Sparkling water with a lime wedge it is.” She winks at me.

“Jesus take the wheel.” He mutters under his breath.

“You’ll be meeting Jesus soon if you don’t shape up.” I tell him as I flip my book back open. I can sense Kevin’s gaze on me, but he wises up and keeps his mouth shut until our plane lands in Baja California. The exhale that comes out of his mouth makes me smile when our eyes meet.

“I could be really mean right now, but I won’t.”

“Don’t even pretend.” He shakes his head at me with a nervous laugh. He leans forward and kisses me gently. His hand comes to my belly and pushes against our daughter.

We make it to the resort and onto the beach in under an hour. Kevin immediately dives into the ocean. I’m thankful for a break from his constant check ins. I settle into a chair with my book again, glancing every so often at my husband to make sure he keeps popping his head above the surface. It isn’t long before he’s emerging from the water, rippling muscles covered with droplets racing down them. I moan and bite my lip at his approach. He reaches for his towel on the lounge chair next to me, wiping his body off and studying me.

“You’re getting red. You need more sunscreen.” He completely misses my invitation. Instead, he reaches into our beach bag for the baby sunblock we brought from the room. “Maybe we should get another umbrella over here for you.” He extends his hand to me with the bottle. “Also, I haven’t seen you drink enough water today.” My eye twitches at the last sentence. I release a heavy sigh and put my book down. He is killing me. At this rate, I won’t be enjoying more than five minutes of this vacation.

“Kevin. Baby, I love you so much, but you are getting on my last damn nerve.” I say to him, flipping my sunglass up so he can see the annoyance in my green eyes. “You have been concerned about this pregnancy since the day you saw her on the ultrasound and it is getting to be too much. Your girls are fine. Relax.”

“Sorry I love you two.” Defensiveness drips from his tone.

“I know you love us, but you’re smothering us. And I’ve asked you to stop multiple times.”

“Us?” He questions with a wrinkle of his nose.

“Yes! Us! Lacey told me she wants to enjoy this vacation without your fussing!” The sound of our daughter’s name makes Kevin’s frustration ease. I flick my sunglasses back down onto my nose. “If you need a task, go get me something to drink that isn’t water.” My tone is pointed and a reminder for him to mind his damn business about what I put into my body.

“Well… what do you want?” He asks me, grabbing his shirt and pulling it back over his large shoulders. He buttons one button to keep it together and stands.

“Surprise me.” I mumble without looking up from my book. Kevin hovers for another moment before slumping off to find a drink hut. When he is gone from ear shot I release another heavy sigh. He is so intense these days. This entire pregnancy really. He was not like this with Luca, but something about this one has him going a little crazy. Maybe it’s because of how difficult it was to conceive her. Maybe it’s because its our first daughter. I don’t know. All I know is if he’s like this now, what will he do when Lacey is out in this scary world?

“He will take care of you, sweetheart.” I murmur to our daughter. I press into where she’s resting and close my eyes. “You’re lucky to have him as your daddy. He’s a good man.” I assure her, rubbing a few tight circles over her on my stomach. A shadow casts over me. It’s my husband, standing above me with a grin.

“I heard that.”

“Good.” I say, reaching for the pink drink he extends adorned with a blue umbrella. “What is this?”

“Virgin Sex on the Beach. Didn’t think there was such a thing.” His eyes deepen before he glances over his shoulder, seeing how much privacy we have.

“I’m not having sex with you in the sand.” I say immediately as I take the glass from him. I know where he is trying to go with this. Luckily, his overprotectiveness has never applied to our sex life. “It takes forever to get out of the vag.”

“Damn it.” He groans. “Wait, how do you know that? We haven’t had sex on a beach.” I purse my lips around the straw and slide my gaze away.

“Samantha.” He tisks at me.

“Spring break. Pensacola Beach. Freshman year in college. It wasn’t that good because of said sand.” I shrug at him, settling back into my chaise. Kevin gives me a sour look. “Oh stop. It was with my boyfriend at the time. Tell me more about having your own apartment at 17.” His face immediately breaks out into a smile.

“Those were good days.”

“Fucker.” I narrow my eyes at him, sucking up the delicious juice through my red straw. “Just remember, Kevin. When you think back on those fond memories with your puck bunnies, your daughter will be 17 some day. You better pray that she doesn’t have an encounter with 17 year old you.” The smile immediately drops from Kevin’s face and he looks out across the tumultuous surface of the ocean, hopefully contemplating his poor life choices before me.

“I don’t need to think about those days when I get to wake up next to you every morning.” His gaze travels back to mine. I feel my eyes pinch behind my sunglasses. I reach out for his left hand and slide my thumb across his wedding band. His fingers lace around mine and he brings the back of my hand up to his lips.

“You’re good.” I compliment him.

“I know.” He laughs at me. “Baby, your cheeks are getting really red.” He says gently. “Let’s go up to the pool. There is more shade there.”

“Okay.” I concede, closing my book and tossing it into our bag.

Kevin gathers the rest of our stuff and we make our way up the stairs to the infinity pool. Surprisingly, its relatively empty besides one other couple who are obviously asleep in chaises beneath their cabana. We set our stuff down at two chairs across the pool from them before heading over to the entrance. Kevin jumps into the pool, deciding to forgo the traditional route of stairs. I leisurely walk down into the pool as Kevin drops below the surface of the water again. He stays under for a few moments before he crashes back up, looking at me while pushing his hair back from his face.

“I think in another life you were a fish.” I tease him as he swims over to me.

“I was definitely a shark.” His teeth snap playfully at me. He crouches down and gathers me into his arms, beginning to walk us both back into deeper water. “I’m sorry. I know I’m smothering you, but I can’t seem to stop. From the moment they said girl at the 20 week appointment, my chest has been tight with worry.” He confesses to me, as he continues to wade deeper into the pool. I sigh as the water wraps around my belly and up my breasts. I can feel the pressure of pregnancy releasing off my organs as we float in the warm water.

“S’okay. She’s safe in me.” I mumbled to him, resting my head against his shoulder. Being weightless in his arms and the extra exposure of the sun has my eye lids drooping peacefully.

“Do you want to go back to the room for a nap?” He asks me after a few more minutes of floating around.

“In a little bit. The water is holding her weight and it feels good.”

“Okay.” He murmurs to me. “You know what I’m thinking about right now?”

“The pool in Sweden?” I giggle to him without opening my eyes.

“I haven’t been in a pool since then when I haven’t thought of that.”

“Same.”

He rests his head against mine and water from his wet hair beads down my throat. My hand winds up his neck to the base of his head and I tangle my fingers through his wet locks. Kevin sighs and leans into my fingers. I smile against his shoulder then pucker my lips against his skin. He is warm beneath me and a slight sunburn is starting to bleed through. I open my mouth and take a sliver of his flesh lightly between my teeth. Kevin turns his head to place his lips against my temple.

“Love you.” He whispers to me like a secret the rest of the world isn’t in on. I pull back to look into his face. He’s drowning in adoration as our gazes meet.

“Love you more.” I say to him, pressing our lips together.

“Impossible.” He insists to me.

“Let’s go to bed and we can fight about it there.” I purr against his lips. My tongue traces his bottom lip and he opens his mouth to connect them.

When we get back to our room, Kevin takes me to bed and makes love to me. It’s passionate love making at it’s finest- full of sensual touches and loving caresses that have my pregnancy hormones bouncing in my body. We are both warm from the sun and everywhere our skin touches feels like fire. Afterwards, we rest contently in each others arms. Kevin’s fingers stroke my hair lovingly as our legs tangle together. My lashes flutter against his chest as I struggle to keep my eyes open.

“Go to sleep, baby.” Kevin finally whispers to me before his lips graze my forehead. His words hold the gentle nudge I need. I drift off in moments.

I awaken hours later as the golden light of the setting sun fills our hotel room. I gingerly sit up and wince at the feeling of my hip being asleep. I roll to my back for a moment and rub at the spiky feeling dancing down my leg. I notice Kevin’s absence and turn to look at the balcony that extends from our suite. I see my husband there, laying back in his chair with his head tilted towards the sun. He looks so good. The orange and yellow hues of the sunset bounce off his tan skin and muscular chest.

I carefully roll onto my side and push myself up into a sitting position. I scoot myself off the bed and try not to feel exasperated at how unnecessarily hard that was. My body is working overtime growing a human being. It’s okay if it doesn’t function like it used to before babies. My movement catches Kevin’s eye and he turns to take me in. I’m still naked and his brown eyes devour me. I watch his gaze slide to all his favorite places. A yearning need begins to throb ion my core. I reach for the plush hotel robe on the chair by the door, pulling it on before joining him outside.

“Sit with me.” He reaches for my hand and pulls me into his lap. “You look very beautiful.. and sexy.. and loved..” He says each word around a kiss.

“It’s cause you love me so good.” Kevin’s hands rest on my belly as I talk. We can both feel Lacey moving around at the sound of our voices.

“Pregnancy agrees with you.” Kevin murmurs to me. “You’re like a glowing goddess.”

“You must not have seen me trying to get off the bed just now.” I laugh at him, dropping my forehead to his. I pull back and look at his face again. He looks at me in a way that makes my heart skip a beat.

“You’re perfect.” He says simply. And as I always do, I believe him. “What do you want for dinner?”

“I wish I could have real sushi.” I whine to him. “It would be so good here.”

“I know. I thought about that.” He frowns at me.

“Um.. honestly carne asada tacos sound good. With chips and guac.”

“You got it.” He pats my butt for me to rise. He walks over to his phone and begins to put our order in through the app.

“Oh! Babe! Fried ice cream!” I yell to him and he smiles at me, giving me a thumbs up.

“I already knew you wanted that.” He laughs when he joins me on the balcony after he’s done. “You’ve got my baby in there. She definitely wants ice cream.”

“I’ve never craved sweets more in my life than being pregnant with your children.” I shake my head at him. We grow quiet and look out across the ocean. The ripples of the water are glowing in the fading light. It’s picturesque. Just like the man sitting across from me.

“Oh, while you were sleeping, I called down to the spa and they have a massage therapist here who specializes in prenatal massages. Apparently, she’s from Canada and lives down here during the winter season.”

“What….” My eyes widen at him in excitement. “I want that. Tomorrow.” I nod my head at him.

“Good, cause you’re going. 10am.”

“What if she massages the baby right out of me?”

“You know I don’t think that’s funny.” He rolls his eyes at me. “Plus, Lacey and I talked about it while you were sleeping. She’s agreed to stay in you until we are back home.” I let out a loud snort of a laugh, tilting my head back.

“Wow, she’s already a daddy’s girl.”

A knock at the door stops Kevin from responding. He jogs to grab it and brings our meal out to me on the balcony. My carne asada tacos smell and look so good that my mouth is watering instantly. Kevin got Baja shrimp tacos. We both split the chips and guac and settle with water for drinks after our day in the sun.

“Have you heard from my parents? I thought they would have called at bedtime.” I ask him after my first bite. He nods his head at me, but swallows his food before he speaks.

“Your mom FaceTimed me with Luca while you were sleeping.”

“Dang it.” I frown, tapping Kevin’s phone screen to see the time. It’s well past Luca’s bedtime now. He’s likely been asleep for hours.

“It’s probably good he didn’t see you. He was a little upset. It would have been hard for you.” He gives me a small shrug.

“Yeah, you’re probably right. Did he cry when he saw you?”

“No, but he was going down that road the longer we talked, so I told your mom we should just end the call. She texted me a picture of him five minutes later with your dad reading to him. He was happy and sleepy.”

“Okay. I’ll try to call tomorrow morning and see how it goes.” I pick up a piece of steak with my fingers, chewing it slowly. It melts in my mouth and is bursting with flavors of citrus and salt. “It’s been a little easier than I thought to be away from him.” I admit to Kevin.

“You needed a break.” He acknowledges to me. “You’ve been doing a lot the last few months- growing a baby and chasing a toddler.”

“That’s true. I feel kind of guilty though.” I shrug my shoulders.

“You’re an amazing mom. Every parent needs a break from their kid. It's normal.”

“Yeah, I know that. I just… I kind of feel bad that you have this week off and I took you away from him. Not sure that’s fair to either of you.”

“Babe, we needed to reconnect with each other. Being here together is going to make us better parents for him when we get back.” I nod my head in agreement.

“Yeah, I know you’re right.” I push my plate of half eaten tacos away. At this point in my pregnancy, I get full pretty quickly. But there is always room for dessert. “Where is my ice cream?” I ask him. He laughs and goes into the fridge, grabbing it and placing it in front of me. It’s at a perfect eating consistency and easy to spoon into my mouth.

“Fuck…” I moan out as the first bite slides into my mouth. Kevin’s eyes meet mine and an awareness blankets the balcony. I stick my tongue out of my mouth and lick the remaining ice cream off the back of the spoon. Kevin clears his throat and breaks his gaze away from mine. “I can’t wait to do this to you later.” I whisper to him. His gaze darts back to my eyes. I deliberately run my tongue along each edge of my top teeth while looking into his eyes. Kevin swallows and he releases a quick exhale.

“Just tell me when.” He finally speaks to me. His voice is dripping with obvious arousal. I’m satisfied with his response.

“When I’m done with my ice cream.” Kevin nods his head at my teasing and then smirks. His tongue dances along his bottom lip before he sucks in a corner of it between his teeth. It pops back into place, a little plumper than before. I blink as a wave of involuntary pleasure weaves around my body. My mouth instantly begins to water. It has nothing to do with the ice cream on my spoon.

“Now.” I whimper out to him. He pumps his fist, then picks me up and we fall into bed moments later.

After we take the latest edge off, Kevin spoons me from behind. I lazily run my fingers along his forearm where his hand is resting on my bump.

“I’m glad you made us do this.” He whispers into my ear. His breath makes a few strands of my hair tickle my face. “We feel like us again… Sam and Kevin, not mom and dad.”

I sigh and lean back deeper into his chest. His palm tightens around my bump and our daughter kicks against him.

“We do. And now I’m ready for her to be here.” I murmur to him.

“Me too.” He nuzzles my neck with his nose. “But for now, go get that ice cream you’re obviously still thinking about. Then, I’ll rub your feet.”

“Yay!” I shimmy in excitement and bounce off the bed to the balcony. He laughs and watches me from the bed like a man who hasn’t had enough of his wife.

I reach for my ice cream, not even caring that it’s barely ice cream anymore, and turn with the cup in my hand. I pause there, taking in the view from across the room. Kevin has grabbed the remote for the TV and he flicks through the channels to find something for us to watch. My breath catches in my throat as my eyes trail down his naked body. He’s strong and sexy but most of all he’s sweet. The sweetest man I could have ever asked for to be mine. He absentmindedly brings a hand to his face and he rubs at the days worth of stubble growing there. I could watch him just be, doing normal human things, for hours. My lack of movement draws his eyes to me. The smile that he gives me forces goosebumps to break out down my body. Thank God this man’s baby is in me.

“Holy shit.” I say through bubbling tears in my throat. “I love you. Way more than this ice cream.” At this point in my pregnancy, he’s immune to my hormonal emotions.

“Good. Now, come back to bed.” _ _ _

My eyes are closed when I hear her cry for the first time. Just like with Luca, the overwhelming emotions sweep over me. Kevin’s lips are on my cheek and he grips my hand tightly.

“Are you okay?” He asks me, noting my silence. All I can do is nod.

She’s finally here.

When I open my eyes, I watch intently as they hand Lacey to Kevin to hold. His lips part as he sucks in a surprising breath when he sees her face.

“I’m done for.” He whispers to me. His eyes are filling with tears and I’m a little concerned something is wrong with her. “She looks just like you.” He finally tells me, turning our daughter so I can see her face. He is right. Even through the goop, she’s a Stalock through and through. I beam at him and my eyes match his teary ones.

“She is me.” I confirm to him.

“She is so lucky. So beautiful.” He smiles and brings her down closer to my face. She’s pure perfection. Her eyes are open and she’s looking around at her new surroundings. Her face is beginning to signal a cry, distorting in anguish.

“Mama’s here, Lace.” I whisper to her. She pauses mid-cry at the sound of my voice. Fresh tears leak from my eyes and Kevin reaches to brush them away. “Babe, I want to hold her.”

“Okay.” Kevin murmurs to me, scooting closer with his chair and leaning forward. He gently places Lacey on my chest, helping my arms support her weight in my drugged up haze. I reach for her face and slowly brush the tips of my fingers over her features. Kevin sighs contently next to me as his brown eyes turn to mush while looking at our daughter. He’s head over heels in love with a new girl. And I’m perfectly okay with that.

“What is this sweet girl’s name?” Grace asks as she checks our baby’s heartbeat again. It’s strong and steady, just how we want it.

“Lacey Marie Fiala.” I tell her without taking my eyes from our daughter.

“Vítej na světě, naše dokonalá holka.” Kevin speaks softly in Czech.

Welcome to the world, our perfect girl.

[niuttuc]

This is wildly specific but, thoughts on the Kenruth's dual spark? Seems like it could have been really interesting to see how a spark shared by two planes walkers works but instead they got it yoinked

The whole "soul shared by twins" thing is always a bit weird when they're individual people, though at least they didn't take it too far and they were mostly annoyed at the shared planeswalking thing, like siblings that deeply love and bicker with each other. And their infantile resurrection helps justify it a bit too.

I don't think too much interesting was on the table with that tbh, mostly them showing up together, it's not like spark manipulation is a common thing that gets explored often, though more so recently. I do think things could have been explored a bit more in depth with Will and Rowan going their own ways in Wilds of Eldraine, if the set had had more than the five stories it got.

I will plug in some stuff I wrote in private back when those stories came out, because it illustrates where I kind of want this to go after.

Things I want to see next time we come back to Eldraine: a few years have passed, Will has become a wise king, Rowan a powerful witch, and there's something dangerous that forces them to work together again. They really don't want to, but they have to. Doing that, they see all that changed about the other over the years, and that they're now a mostly different person with completely different views of the world… But they also learn that they're both still good people, and how to reconnect as the new people they now are

"Don't even try to act like you did nothing wrong, I heard about Elstown, Ro!" "Oh yeah? And what did you hear?" "They were children, witch! How could you! And don't try to pretend it wasn't you, I saw what remains of their ancestral tree. Lightning doesn't strike the same place five times." "So you saw the tree, but you didn't even realize it was a Spriggan's nest! But of course you wouldn't see one of those in your castles and balls. You think yourself so clever." "What… And the children?" "This bastard had killed them long before I arrived! If you did your job, I wouldn't have to swoop in and take the blame. But I'm sure all those meetings and festivals are helping the Realm so much." "I… They do! When's the last time you heard about a dragon attack? About a petty war between two nobles sending hundreds to their deaths!" "People are still dying!" "People are always dying, but now it's less! You act like you're such a big hero, we didn't find any remains of those children. Spriggans don't eat bones, last I heard!" "I… I can use them. Save more people. It's worth it. It's not like I killed them!"

[lackablazeical]

Okay, so I went hunting for some music that reminds me of the addams au, and I would like to offer to the masses:

For some angrier Usagi songs/songs if Usagi snapped, I offer you Burning House by Nico Collins, Sarcasm by Get Scared, The Fox by North Bloom, How It Feels To Be Lost by Sleeping With Sirens, The Darker The Weather // The Better The Man by MISSIO, and Gasoline by Halsey (I know this last one's not perfect lyrics-wise, but the energy feels like it fits Usagi to me).

For some sadder Usagi, I offer lovely by Billie Eilish, Neurosis by Oliver Riot, Silence by Marshmallo & Khalid, Lost Control by Alan Walker & Sorana, Can I Exist by MISSIO, and My Heart's Grave by Faouzia.

For some songs that fit if Usagi ever escaped, I offer Requiem from Dear Evan Hansen, Lost by ILLENIUM & Emilie Brandt, and Paranoia by Neoni.

Church by Fall Out Boy is very fitting for Leo's perception of his relationship with Usagi, methinks.

And for a more accurate take on the Leosagi relationship, so to speak, I offer Rituals by Jiovanni Daniel and Kitchen Fork by Jack Conte.

And lastly, for some Mikey I offer you Kamikazee by MISSIO, CEMETARY by AViVA, Monster by Willyecho, Play with Fire by Sam Tinnesz & Yacht Money, and Hell's Comin' with Me by Poor Man's Poison.

I'm sure you've heard plenty of these already lol, but I thought I'd share in case any of these catch your attention. :]

Jupiter, I owe you my LIFE

Who would've known Nico Collins really just FITS Leosagi???? Like all the songs so far have matched really well?? And I love how The Fox just has that really angry just SCREAMING in it, it's so raw and just. It gives me the happy. And how do I EVEN TALK ABT Darker the weather//better the man w/o just copy pasting the entire song????? Hm?????

Usagi and Mikey both match Gasoline so well but like. On opposite ends of the spectrum and just. Kicking my feet and skipping down the street ong

I'm convinced Billie and Khalid just wrote Lovely FOR Usagi. Convinced of it, absolutely.

And Neurosis???? Just the paranoid energy and just. ALL OF IT! YES! Yes please??? I love how it's almost blaming himself for Leo, like that he was something Usagi 'did wrong' sorry, pardon my heart eyes rn 😍

And The Silence song??? God how it talks about how Usagi always gave but never Got AND THE FUCKING 'I FOUND PEACE IN YOUR VIOLENCE' I AM DONE PRETENDING TO BE NORMAL!!!!!! IM DONE!!!!!/pos

I don't even know how to TALK about 'my hearts grave' other then just feral screams/pos

I swear these Dear Even Hansen songs always stab me in the heart but I love them SO MUCH <33333 I REALLY REALLY DO!!!! Usagi gets a hopeful song. I'll let him have this

And I love how The 'Lost' song has the 'its back to basics now' because TRUE!!! And just the rhythm and the energy and AAAAA 💕💕💕💕

Also what is it about songs about paranoia that hit so HARD???? WHAT IS IT???? BUT NEONI OVER HERE CAN TAKE ALL MY MONEY AND PROPERTY NOW. RIGHT NOW

And I would've never thought of falloutboy for Leo, but NOW ITS ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT/POS

And I think Rituals by Jiovanni Daniel is like???? A new fave song???? Both just overall and in Leosagi terms???? I love the little 'fear on your skin, let the ritual begin' whisper, it's so. Idk how to describe it but I promise I love it

Kamikaze is actually already in Mikeys playlist!!!!! Because it's fucking SPOT ON!!!!! SERIOUSLY!!! And Monster???? By willyecho???? How do yall find such good songs???? I could see Mikey singing and jamming to this, I love the guitar (I think, I'm not a instrument person) in the background. Whatever it is

Play with fire gives me so much art inspo I wanna draw Mikey SO BAD he's one of those mfers who likes the smell of gasoline and how he's an adrenaline junkie and just. Please I'm not eloquent enough to explain my love of all these SONGS

And hells coming with me??? Mikey is definitely one for revenge... and he DEFINITELY thinks he's a god... please Mikey would kill me if he knew a country song was on his playlist but it fits too well to NOT ADD

I'm sorry some of these are really vague, but I'm/gen when I say I listened to all the songs and enjoyed them greatly. Thank you so much :]

[orchidyoonkook]

What do you wish someone would ask you about ‘To What We Were Before and All the things After’ ? Answer it now!

So I got this ask a hot minute ago and I wanted to sit on it for a while because I didn't have an answer.

And I think I've finally found one?

-> Why do you include certain scenes that people may not like or think fit the story in their opinion?

I got a comment on AO3 that actually made me think of this. It was something along the lines of "I hate it when girls fight over a guy" and my honest answer is:

Same.

I hate it. It's stupid. I've never done it as I see it as redundant and would rather just give the other person the thing they want and save myself the drama.

So why did I write it?

Because it was important to the overall story.

And just because I don't like something, doesn't mean that thing never happens. Girls fight over boys every day, it's a tale as old as time. And in the case of Yuri being a bit bananaballs about JK, once you learn her backstory more, I think you'll be able to see why she acts the way she does and why her past traumas manifest this way.

It's important to put preference aside when writing stories. It allows you to grow and experience things you normally wouldn't. It makes you uncomfortable in a good way, and lets you to put yourself into shoes you may normally hate or not understand. And then by doing so, potentially and unintentionally making yourself understand them and grow as a person.

Knowledge is power. And so while some people may see it as two girls fighting over a boy. When I wrote it, I saw it as:

A girl that gets defensive over a seemingly unreachable boy, lets you as the reader, learn about her in a way you may never have thought to before.

She seemed fine before that. She knows Reader has a life partner, she KNOWS reader would never do that to her. So why react that way?

To make you question her a little deeper.

Why is she so defensive? Is she really that clueless? Does she really have no self awareness?

Or is she maybe still a young girl at heart, one that’s clutching desperately onto once previously shattered dreams? Is she maybe looking for a man more powerful than her parents to sweep her away from her dreaded future?

And so when she’s confronted so harshly with reality by Reader, maybe she doesn't know how to cope properly, never learned how to.

And instead she learned to create a narrative that fit her needs better; learned how to escape bad feelings by pushing others away and blocking the bad feelings out and pretending they didn’t exist.

In the wise words of Ender Wiggan,

“In the moment when I truly understand my enemy, understand him well enough to defeat him, then in that very moment I also love him. I think it's impossible to really understand somebody, what they want, what they believe, and not love them the way they love themselves."

And you have to do that when writing (the way I do). I consider it forced, mutual growth.

[emilyblame]

‘Intellectual Property’ thoughts

i already wrote something about this album, but after listening to it on repeat for a week, i have some more things to say.

before i go straight into the track by track, i wanna say that i really love the album. and i wasn’t expecting to. i listened to it on Friday with zero expectations and was pleasantly surprised to find myself enjoying it, especially the deep cuts. and the more i listened to it, the more i loved it. and even after a week i keep finding things hidden in the songs, effects, little details that make me love each of them more.

Favorite song: still Closer. sorry.

St*rfucker

the first time I heard this song i hated the autotune in it, but the more i listened to it, the less i cared about it. there is so much going on production-wise, it now distracts me from the autotune. i mean, this bass track is insane, i really love it. i know Awsten said he referenced Fuzzy a lot in this track, but i think there’s a difference between referencing and using the same concept. i like that he took the concept of ‘demons driving a limo to his window’ and shifted it into him becoming a ‘demon’ and driving his love interest crazy by grabbing ‘the wheel’ (ie: control) of the relationship and taking it whenever he wants it to go.

speaking of the lyrics… i know he’s probably talking about some relationship with a girl, but i can’t help but wonder if the line ‘i signed somebody’s NDA’ is about Elijah maybe. because they seemed to be really close friends (like, they hung out all the time) and then all of a sudden they didn’t speak anymore and neither of them said anything about it. that was super weird. also the lines ‘LA’s such a fucking weird place’ and ‘you can’t hide my face but save me for a rainy day’ make me think of the song they wrote together, Rainy Days In LA. but i could be completely wrong… most likely.

and i already talked about this, but i really like the abrupt ending and how that plays into Real Super Dark.

Real Super Dark

the music in this track is insane. the vocals are good too, i just hate the way Awsten scream sounds. i’ve said this before, but to me, he sounds like an enraged poodle when he’s screaming and i find it both comical and annoying. the lyrics have some cringe-worthy moments much in the same way Numb did, what with the Coldplay and the scummy-dummy-whatever-the-fuck-he’s-saying lines. here we have the Otto ‘serial-killing’ him line that unnecessarily drags along the entire song (although, i have to admit the line ‘Otto, I’m sorry, stop’ reminds me of the “Louisiana Hotel” video and i find that somewhat endearing.) but the rest of the lyrics are okay. oh, and i really love the da-da-das too.

i mean, what i really love about this song, and why i think it’s so fucking good even though i hate Awsten’s scream, is that it feels like what the lyrics are about. does that make sense? I mean, he says ‘i wake up and i’m up and i’m down’ and the song is literally a rollercoaster: it goes heavy with the guitars and the screaming and then it has the very soft da-da-das and he goes from screaming to falsetto and vice versa. it sounds exactly like being angry one moment, then being okay at the next, then angry again, then like you don’t give a fuck anymore. and i don’t know how Awsten achieved that, or if he was intentionally trying to, but he got it and he got it right.

Funeral Grey

musically this song is so summery and perfect. it’s great to jump and dance too, and even sing along too if you can pretend to not understand the lyrics. like, the vocal melody just feels so nice to sing along to, but if you pay attention to the lyrics, it makes you go yikes :/ boi why.

and i know Awsten’s fragile ego gets butthurt whenever we criticise his lyrics, but it’s really his fault we’re so demanding with them. we got two albums packed with perfectly crafted lyrics (‘Double Dare’ and ‘Entertainment’) only for him to get ‘dumber’ with time, it just doesn’t make sense. and it’s kinda disappointing. i know this song is supposed to be lighthearted and fun, but lyrics just fall flat.

(i legit spent ten minutes just trying to come up with an example of how he already made lighthearted and fun lyrics but honestly? every Parx song is so packed with emotion, i couldn’t come up with one.)

you know how this song feels? like Fruit Roll Ups. music? insane. lyrics? burn them to the ground until there’s nothing left.

Brainwashed

this song is perfect. music is incredible, vocals are amazing. the lyrics are good. again, a very dancy, jump-along-to song. yes.

also, finally we get a good riff, like, FINALLY. we all know they both can shred, why the fuck is he constantly holding back on riffs and solos is beyond me. the bass track: crazy. and i love it when he sings fast, so… this song is a 10/10 for me, there’s nothing that could make it better, it’s perfect.

(i hate the way he pronunces ‘syndrome’ but it’s still perfect.)

2 Best Friends

we~eeell… i talked about this one already. it sounds like an unfinished demo. and i say ‘unfinished’ because we’ve heard Awsten’s demos; they can sound like they were recorded on a potato, alright, but never unfinished.

the lyrics are… meh, but they get the point across. i really enjoy the juxtaposition of how happy the song sounds with the lyrics ‘it didn’t work and i feel like shit / wake up tomorrow and try again’. that moment feels like a shrug emoji, and i kinda love it, honestly. also, i really like the little synth/piano melody that plays at the end of the chorus; it’s refreshing.

but, yeah, generally this is the weakest song in the album. then again, if we compare it with ‘Greatest Hits’, it’s not even that much of a low point. i feel like LIKE IT is more of a disappointment within ‘Greatest Hits’ than 2 Best Friends is for ‘Intellectual Property’. and i really like LIKE IT.

End Of The Water (Feel)

i love this song. it’s really good. i absolutely adore the line ‘why can’t we act like you and i are alive at the same time’. like, yes, why are human beings so complicated. then again, it shouldn’t be complicated. so if it feels like a lot of work it’s probably not meant to be.

philosophical tangents aside, this is a good song. i can see it becoming a fan favorite (speaking of, i should probably do a poll soon.) i really like how funky it sounds. i kinda keep imagining what it would sound like if Ross Lynch sang it.

Self-Sabotage

i absolutely loved this song from day one. the lyrics are brutally honest and genuine. i love seeing Awsten not putting himself as the victim for once. not to overlook on the fact that he’s a fucking dick, i don’t care how much your heart got broken, it doesn’t justify you being horrible to someone else. it’s not a valid defence mechanism, you’re just an asshole.

back to the music: love it. impossible not to jump to the chorus every single time, it’s so catchy. also, i never thought i’d say this, but i kinda love how breathy Awsten’s voice is in this one.

i also really like the line ‘i want this to work so bad / but i want what i can’t have’.

Ritual

boy this song is… a lot. in a good way. i like that it’s only three verses that repeat, and all of them are fucking gems. but my favorite part is the build up to the bridge + the bridge + the outro: it sounds insane. lights off, headphones on. there’s so much going on. i love the strings and the panning is insane. did Zakk Cervini produce this one too? cheers, bro, it’s incredible.

one thing i wish he did is hold a scream right after ‘shut the fuck up’ during the outro. but i understand that’s not what Awsten does and honestly, with his screaming it wouldn’t be that good. but with a good screamer… ooohhhh boy.

Fuck About It

another one i liked from the first listen. i talked about this before: i like bear’s voice but i hate bear’s verse. it does not fit well with the rest of the song. it is cringy as fuck and also it says things Awsten would neverrrr. but whatever, the song sounds good. i really like bear’s high harmonies on the second chorus.

one thing i never understood was why people went crazy over the last ‘baby’, though. like… it’s not that impressive, or sexy, or anything. i would be more impressed if he would’ve belted it, Royal stylez.

Closer

this song is… an infinite/10. it’s so fucking perfect, i’m so glad they’re playing it on the in-store acoustic shows. it deserves all the fucking love it can get. my favorite thing is the subtle strings in it. i love how vulnerable the lyrics are. and i know Awsten is gonna be all like ‘yOU oNLy LikE mE wHEn i’M hurTInG’ which is not fucking true. we like you better when you’re honest, not when you’re trying to be clever.

this song is honest and it’s vulnerable, and it feels like he’s finally being able to bare his soul and heart even though it hurts and it makes him feel like shit. it kinda makes me think of Crybaby, the way it feels.

it’s so good. i especially love how soft the last chorus is; here’s another good example of Awsten’s voice becoming breathy, but i think this time is because he’s singing too soft to hit that note and so his voice gives out. but it makes for a cool effect. it makes me want to hug him and telling him it’s all gonna be okay.

A Night Out On Earth

what a fucking good album closer. i mean. stars all around. yes. the music is amazing, the lyrics are so good, there’s a couple lines here that are just a slap on the face (in a good way.)

all of Waterparks’ closing tracks are amazing. well— See You In The Future has some cringy lyrics (most of it, honestly.) but the rest of the closing tracks are awesome, so it’s really not surprising that this one is also stellar.

i fucking love the lines: ‘i turn pain into rent and sing along’, ‘life gave me lemons now i bleed lemonade’, ‘now i just wanna fall asleep in my own’, and ‘was i loved or was i right?’

but generally all the lyrics are good. i like this song a lot. the guitar riff/solo over the last chorus/outro… yes. also, that Fish feature. babies <3 i love Fish he’s such a cool guy. I like how that plays with the line ‘i ain’t jumping out the window’ because it reinforces its meaning: that he’s come so far and he’s not done yet.

so, i said this at the very beginning but overall: the album is good. and it sounds good as it is. i loved ‘FANDOM’ but it was a little messy, i re-ordered it in a way that it tells the story of him falling in love and then the relationship going sour (kinda like what he did with ‘Intellectual Property’.) and i also had to re-order ‘Greatest Hits’ so that it tells the story of Awsten slowly losing his mind (is the only way i listen to the album now, otherwise it gets boring to me.)

what i love about ‘Intellectual Property’ is that every song in it feels deliberate. as if he sat down to write a good album; an album that told a story instead of just info-dumping us his problems in the form of songs. Awsten learned the ‘less is more’ lesson.

i really hope they get their top 10. they deserve it. even if not for this album alone, but for ‘Double Dare’ and ‘Entertainment’. for Parx history. for Awsten not selling out and making a pop-punk record. thank. god. he didn’t. that would’ve been extremely disappointing.

anyway, i am rambling. i’m gonna finish this up by saying: this is a fucking good record. and if you don’t like it right now it’s totally fine, it’s completely valid. but give a moment. let it breathe. come back to it. you still hate it? give it more time. let it breathe again. come back to it, come back to it a thousand times, it’s worth it.