#Payneland first kiss
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Hear me out
Payneland first kiss
But it's a reunion kiss
They get separated while on a case
Charles almost gets into trouble and realizes how much he needs Edwin by his side
Edwin almost hurts himself due to Charles not being there to protect him
So imagine this
The 2 finally find a mirror after so long
Walk through it
See each other
And practically sprint into one another's arms
They hug each other tightly, desperate to feel something (Since it's canon that thwy can othet feel each other and othet ghosts)
Charles pulls away, cups Edwins cheeks, and pulls him into a kiss
Edwin is surprised at first, but eases up and confusingly places his hands on Charles' shoulder
This wasn't his first kiss, Monty had taken that previlage, but this felt different
Cat King commented on how the 2nd kiss is the best kiss, and his was technically Edwins 2nd kiss. So mayhaps it's that?
Or maybe it's because it's his best mate, and not some damn crow that's kissing him
Or maybe it's because it's one of the only sensations he has felt for a while
Or maybe, just maybe, it's because it's Charles doing it
Whatever reason, this kiss with Charles feels different.
They haven't really discussed anything about the confession in Hell, or anything remotely romantic here in London. Only on that rooftop in Port Townsend. Where Charles had reassured him that nothing has changed between them
But what about now? I mean, their lips were finally together. This is what Edwin wanted
But he still needs to hear Charles say it
Edwin pulls away and stares into Charles' eyes
"Say it."
"What?"
"Say the thing"
"What thing, mate?"
"Say the thing that reassures me that that.." He wildly gestures the kiss "Was real. That you didn't do that out of desperation to feel something"
Charles pauses and realizes what his beat mate is saying. He wasn't sure how to say it, but, that kiss wasn't out of desperation
It was out of realization
The realization that he wanted Edwin to be his partner in every sense of the word. The realization that he wanted to be there for Edwin, and Edwin to be there for him. Tge realization that they're stuck together for eternity, as long as they don't go to the afterlife. Which luckily... They won't
Charles grabs Edwins cheeks and pulls him into another kiss. Edwin kisses back. It's finally happening. Right?
"I love you, Edwin Payne"
"I love you in every sense of the phrase"
#Dbd#Dbda#Dead boy detectives#Dead boy detectives agency#Charles Rowland#Edwin Payne#Payneland#Painland#charles x edwin#edwin x charles#dbd headcanons#Reunion kiss#Payneland first kiss
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can't stop thinking about george confirming ghosts can feel each other... it all acquires a new meaning... edwin's gasp as they hug after the case of the two dead dragons... charles' hand coming to rest where his heart used to be in the finale... the one being the only tangible thing keeping the other grounded as they thread over earth like shadows
#thinking about how much charles misses kissing and how *good* it's going to be when they finally kiss#also i'm really happy hell wasn't the first time they could feel each other's touch#but also i was ready to die on the hill that ghosts can feel each other even if the whole cast/writers had denied it#i'm ignoring my upcoming exams so i keep thinking about those dead boys <3#dead boy detectives#dbda#charles rowland#edwin payne#payneland
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Can we appreciate how Charles and Edwin both have very specific types
Charles: bitchy, sad, magic user, who’s mean to everyone but him and way stronger than people think
Edwin: funny, easy going guys with family related trauma who can be a little air-headed but most of the time are way smarter than people think OR whores
#dead boy detectives#dead boy detective netflix#dead boy detective agency#edwin paine#edwin payne#charles rowland#payneland#monty the crow#monty finch#cat king#had to work him in somehow and charles is a little bit whorish too#i mean his first thought about death is ‘huh i’d really miss kissing’ and starts flirting with crystal barely ten minutes after meeting her
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PAINLAND WEEK DAY 3: first kiss/confession
this isn’t a day late I SWEAR
I saw @homoquartz draw charles with a mullet and I HAD to do it as well. might be silly and draw him like this from now on who knows
#dbd#art#digital art#artist#artists on tumblr#dead boy detectives#dbda#dbd fanart#dbd art#dbda fanart#dbda art#Charles Rowland#edwin paine#Edwin Payne#painland#painlandweek#payneland#first kiss#fanart
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painland week, day 3 : first kiss/confession of love "i knew you truly loved me, as i loved you, when everything swam in blue."
#painlandweek#payneland#dead boy detectives#dead boy detective agency#charles rowland#edwin payne#dbda fanart#edwin x charles#charles x edwin#painland#charles and edwin#dead boy detectives fanart#dbd netflix#dbd show#+ please. for the love of my afterlife. just click and zoom for better(ish) quality#if you saw me missing yesterday's and posting this one 6 mins before deadline: no u didn't <3#art#artists on tumblr#my art#digital drawing#for folks that are curious about this: initially this scene comes after their first kiss! and the confession comes soon after#left it ambiguous but maybe i'll elaborate later heh#hope you like it even a quarter as much as i loved drawing it <3#sth sth they're each other's heaven#no consistent artstyle club
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#dead boy detectives#dbda fanart#charles rowland#edwin payne#payneland#keep loving#renew dead boy detectives#chedwin#their first kiss will be unexpected for both of them
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Can't stop thinking about Edwin and Charles finally kissing, getting there tentatively and slowly, but when they both discover at the same time that they can actually feel it, Edwin gasps
And Charles absolutely loses his mind
It's everything he missed from when he was alive and more, so much more, because it's Edwin
He can't stop
What started out as a nervous but tender expression of Charles's budding feelings turns into a blinding storm
He can't help but press Edwin into the nearest surface, which just so happens to be a wall, and devour Edwin's sweet and willing mouth that can barely keep up with Charles's new-found desire and love
#people write such good first kiss scenes for them#ive been obsessed#dead boy detectives#edwin payne#payneland#my posts#charles rowland#painland#edwin x charles#chedwin
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WHY are dead boy detectives fanfic writers so MANY and so TALENTED??? I CANNOT KEEP UP (I am making a collection of the best titles, by hand, and another collection of the best writers, just so I can remember to go back and read the rest of their stuff later)
#the best authors have all like 12 to 20 titles each#and im trying to best to read through all of them#ive seen a dozen confession scenes and first kisses and i still cant get enough#everyone has such cool ideas#and everyone writes SO WELL WHAT!!!!!!!#i have to keep a list i cannot possibly collect them otherwise#im like a magpie hoarding beautiful things#dead boy detectives#fic#fanfic#oh right please comment your favorites ill read anything#and so others can find good ones as well!#payneland
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can i have a character call edwin and charles twinks to their faces or will that break edwin and also potentially charles (and definitely crystal if she ever hears of it)
#dead boy detectives#payneland#i'm reusing amina from my veryyyyy first fic and i feel like that is something she would do#hot german magician assistant: you won't kiss my hand as a greeting? unfortunate. how can i help you little twink boys?#crystal: this is the best joke anyone has ever made in my lifetime can i go to your standup show
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oops i wrote a Payneland first kiss ft. the aftermath of a probably horrible case, Charles being a little bit hysterical, and Edwin being a gentle little bitch Charles is happy to see him. He really, really is. He’s so chuffed it feels like his whole body is fizzing with energy and his head is pounding with something that might be pain or might be relief. And his grip on Edwin’s shoulders is only half meant to keep himself upright. It’s also because Edwin is properly, actually here in front of him, as solid as anything gets beneath Charles’ fingers these days.
He doesn’t think he’s stopped grinning since Edwin hauled him upright.
“Edwin,” he says, and can’t quite piece together anything better than, “you bloody genius!”
And then Charles surges forward and kisses him. He’s aiming for Edwin’s cheek but he’s a little giddy and his eyesight is still a bit blurry and he ends up with his lips pressed to the corner of Edwin’s mouth.
He feels more than he sees when Edwin startles at the contact, but doesn’t think he has it in him right now to pull back for a talk or a scolding or, god forbid, a lecture on impetuous behaviour. So, he tightens his hands around Edwin’s shoulders and tugs him in a little ways, until their foreheads are pressed together. Edwin blinks a few times and Charles feels his eyelashes flutter against his own cheek.
“You did it!”. He can hardly believe the words as he speaks them and he keeps kind of laughing in little bursts of uncontrollable giggles. “I thought I was going to - that you were - I can’t even really -”
Edwin, who has been relaxing against him by careful degrees, finally jolts into action and brings an arm up around Charles’ shoulders.
“It’s alright,” he says, which Charles thinks is pretty thick for someone as smart as Edwin because of course he’s alright! Edwin just single-handedly swooped in and saved the day and dredged Charles up from the bottom of a literal and metaphorical hole and now he’s got his arm around Charles, close enough that each of his unnecessary breaths stirs the curls around Charles’ ear. He’s a lot fucking more than alright.
Edwin’s hand starts to rub little circles between his shoulder blades. It feels nice.
“Mate,” he tries again. “You are…” but he doesn’t quite know what Edwin is other than the most important person in the world and, anyway, he can’t finish the sentence because Edwin cuts him off in a tone that Charles still thinks is far too serious for the situation.
“Charles, you seem a touch, well.” A slight pause. “For lack of a better word, hysterical.”
Is he hysterical? Charles doesn’t think so, but then again he’s never been great at thinking things through properly at the best of times.
“Also, I must ask.” Charles’s eyes are only centimeters away from Edwin’s, and he watches Edwin squeeze his close. Eyelashes flutter together. “Did you mean to kiss me?”
Charles blinks once.
“Uh,” he says. “Yeah, mate.”
The hand on his back tightens, fingers gripping the fabric of his polo and that feels pretty good too, like Edwin is clinging to him with all the same desperation swirling up inside Charles. Like maybe he’s something solid even when he feels as insubstantial as ghosts can get.
“Well,” Edwin says, finally, with a posh little sniff like he’s right fucking pleased with himself. “That is good to know.”
Charles collapses against him, eventually, when he finally starts breathing steadier and the heavy weight of exhaustion settles over his shoulders. When the giddy adrenaline leaves him feeling a little more cracked open than he’d like. Edwin just gathers him close with the same possessive gesture as his hand.
There’s a soft brush of lips against his temple. He smiles into the collar of Edwin’s coat and lets himself drift, warm and soft and held together
#dbda#paineland#payneland#dead boy detectives#charles x edwin#i have a lot of feelings about romance being a non hierarchical thing#like they are ALREADY each other's person and the fact that they want to kiss doesn't make it more or better suddenly?#and i wanted to represent that somehow in my take on a first kiss#like charles would think through his trauma and his repressed bisexuality and stuff and be like oh whoops i no homoed myself#but i also think they're already together in whatever way they want to be#lol ranting in le tags guys maybe im hysterical too LOL#put this here rather than ao3 bc tis short
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Charles grabbed Edwin's collar and hoped their teeth won't collide when their lips touched. Charles wasn't even sure if he would be able to feel Edwin, but he was not disappointed when he felt the warmness of the other ghost's mouth.
Their lips moved, but just barely, almost as if they were both in shock of what was happening. Edwin wasn't sure why Charles had kissed him, especially after their time in Hell where he claimed he didn't like him back. Not like that, at least.
Edwin put his hand on Charles' cheek, leaning in more, which only made Charles stumble back against the desk. He let go of Edwin and used his hand to lean against the desk as the other ghost moves between his legs and continued to kiss him.
"Aces," Charles let out when they broke apart. His face was flushed and he was looking up at Edwin.
Edwin laughed. "Yeah, aces," he said before kissing him again.
#dont worry they have an actual conversation with feelings and emotions and boundaries but first kiss kiss#payneland#edwin payne#charles rowland#charles x edwin#edwin x charles#dead boy detective agency#dead boy detectives#dbda
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the reason netflix cancelled dead boy detectives is because they're working on a show called alive girl agents btw
#its a very different show from dbd because of Reasons#the first episode opens on niko in her igloo then after the title sequence we see that that was one of Crystal's visions#crystal leads a crusade to find her because those pink clouds around niko when they first met were actually sapphic Feelings#monty is there as well because id riot if he wasn't. eventually he learns how to shift between crow and human#it takes half the season for payneland to get their shit together. they act the exact same once they do#monty kisses a boy and this time the boy kisses him back#obviously this is Not Actually Happening because Netflix Fucking Sucks so I might as well write it myself#eventually#wraith wrambles#dead boy detectives#dbda#dead boy detective agency#crystal palace#niko sasaki#charles rowland#edwin payne#payneland#crystal x niko#edwin x charles#monty the crow#monty finch#the night nurse#<- she shows up Once to collect paperwork. it is one of the most intense scenes in the entire show#also crystal has a bit of a corruption arc bc of david in her mind tree + niko saves her though the magic of love#niko also has genuine magic now#god I need more of this show so badly#save dead boy detectives
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question for the dead boy detectives fans:
would you prefer for Edwin and Charles' relationship to stay platonic or to become romantic?
i'm just genuinely curious
#i would personally prefer for them to become romantic#i ship them from the first second they were on screen together#they even paralleled orpheus and eurydice c'mon#but still it is very very clear that they love eachother so much even if not romantically#and honestly platonic or not i absolutely love their relationship#so in the end it wil be fine either way but i would prefer them to he romantic one day#(a slow burn would be just *chef kiss*)#dead boy detectives#charles rowland#edwin payne#edwin x charles#payneland
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bro what if you try to confess your love for me but then you get sent to superhell bro. bro but then what if i go into superhell to rescue you bro and then you get to finish your love confession bro. and then what if we leave superhell and are together for all eternity because i love you too bro.
#and then what if i gave you one of my convincing smiles and then you kissed be about it bro#just as bros#bros who are in love while also being bros#supernatural could never#i haven’t seen any payneland memes with the destiel cofession format and i think that’s pretty fucked up#dead boy detectives#dead boy detective agency#dbd netflix#neil gaiman#payneland#the funniest fucking ship name btw#bc it’s so fucking accurate#charles rowland#edwin payne#dbd spoilers#yeet my deet#dbda#this is my first day going here (the dbd fandom) so i don’t know what tags you guys use yet#first day at a new school innit#dbdshow#yeet my deebd#dbd4ratch#tmogar#pp42??#bog#save dead boy detectives#renew dead boy detectives
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Part two of the Catland kiss incident (first draft, temporary title, currently being written a couple of paragraphs at a time)! I'm just going to continue tagging @stinastar and @kepodewers , everyone else click through:
🔗 General writing tag 🔗 Story tag 🔗 Part 1
Edwin haunts the streets of London for the rest of the night. He stalks through Camden Market and doesn't take any of it in, steps through pedestrians all over the tube, and provokes a small panic in that Underworld venue Charles likes so much when he circles the main area a bit too fast. It feels as if his feet are particularly intent on taking him to all of Charles' favourite spots: the food stalls and the music shops, that one bookshop in Soho that is so very out of order, the 'haunted house' they once helped clear of a family of barn owls that had been terrifying the neighborhood. Everywhere he goes, he finds reminders of Charles' place in his life: a street where they solved a case, the cemetery where they found that puppy Charles loved so much back in '94, the hospital from the case of the Grim Goblin in 2015... Everywhere Edwin goes, knives pierce at his heart, tear at his throat, burn at his eyes.
How did he not see this coming? They promised to have no secret for each other, after Port Townsend, so how could Edwin possibly have been so blind? Was he too centered on himself? Did he spend so much time trying to keep his feelings to himself that he missed this? He thought Charles hated the Cat King! He thought Charles had no interest in men! How could he have so badly misunderstood his dearest friend, the one creature in the entire world he never wished to be rid of? What else did Edwin not see? It took him over thirty years and the forceful intervention of the Night Nurse to realize Charles hated being dead, now this? What sort of friend does that even make him?
The overly hopeful sort. It takes Edwin time to come to this conclusion. More time than it should, perhaps. However, the unforgiving truth is... He had hoped. He didn't realize it until now, but there was a part of him that still hoped, until the very last moment, that perhaps Charles was facing a similar predicament to his. That his gentle refusal, his enthusiastic pursuit of Crystal and a number of female ghosts over the years, were but a trick, a mask he wore to protect himself from the cruelty of the world. Up until that evening, there was a part of Edwin that hoped perhaps, with time, Charles would change his mind. That he would turn towards him one day, smile the most brilliant of his smiles, and say 'Mate, I'm in love with you.' To be robbed of that hope by the very man who once drew Charles' ire? For a moment, less than the blink of an eye, Edwin thinks perhaps Hell was preferable.
He is immediately assaulted both by the knowledge that Hell was never and will never be preferable to anything, and a wave of disgust for himself so profound he finds himself gagging over the gutter, his nonexistent stomach intent on divesting itself of all the food Edwin hasn't been eating.
#dead boy detectives#payneland#edwin payne#dbda fanfic#fic: the catland kiss incident#matt writes#this is a first draft so feedback is welcome :P#10n
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Fic: True Love's Kiss
Dead Boy Detectives fic. Charles/Edwin.
Painland Week Day 2: myths/legends
Summary: Charles should probably be worried about the fact that the witch they’d been searching for had got away, but, considering that her parting spell had rendered Edwin unconscious, he was rather more preoccupied with that.
Notes: post-canon, love spell, first kiss, love confessions
Also on Ao3
Charles should probably be worried about the fact that the witch they’d been searching for had got away, but, considering that her parting spell had rendered Edwin unconscious, he was rather more preoccupied with that.
Rather than sticking around in the empty warehouse they’d finally cornered her in, Charles grabbed Edwin and hefted him over his shoulder before racing back to the mirror they’d set up earlier. Good thing ghosts didn’t weigh anything; Charles was able to make it back through the mirror to their office within a minute.
“Hey! You’re early, how did it –” Niko cut off as Charles set Edwin’s body down on the floor in front of his desk. “Oh no! What happened?”
“Witch hit him with a spell. Don’t know what. Has to be powerful. Takes a lot to knock out a ghost.” Charles could only communicate in quick bursts with only essential information. Once he’d set Edwin down, he raced to the desk to look over the books Edwin had set aside while investigating the witch.
“What happened?!” This time the question was from Crystal, who entered after hearing all the fuss Charles was making as he threw aside books Edwin had already discounted.
“The witch hit Edwin with a spell,” Niko told Crystal so Charles didn’t have to interrupt his search for the book in which he knew Edwin found the potion they’d been investigating.
“Aha!” He finally spotted it on the couch, open to the page Edwin had found.
Love potions. She’d been using a few on unsuspecting people around London over the last few months. When one had been used on an old client of theirs, Edwin and Charles (and Crystal and Niko) had been tasked with investigating. Crystal had been doing a lot of the legwork with Charles, looking into where she might have been and interviewing people who’d been affected (and maybe doing a bit of mind reading to get extra detail that might have been missed). Meanwhile, Edwin (with some assistance from Niko) had been investigating what remnants of the potion he’d been able to find from their client's bloodwork and one very helpful (and paranoid) victim who’d kept the glass she drank from as evidence, even after the police had come back with negative results.
“Magic roofies. That’s nasty,” Charles had said once Edwin had pinpointed the exact potion the witch was using.
“Indeed. Now we just need to find this witch.”
Once they had narrowed down a general location, they set up a trap, using Crystal as bait, to get close enough to the witch that Edwin could place a tracking spell on her. Once it was set, the boys had followed her back to her “lab” and set up a mirror before attacking.
It had been going well. Edwin got the jump on her with a binding spell while Charles distracted her with physical attacks. Only, in her attempt to get away, she knocked over her cauldron (pasta pot on a gas camping stove) and the fumes disrupted the binding spell. She got one hand free enough to blast Charles away with a telekinetic push, but Edwin was ready with another binding spell at the same time that she shouted a spell towards him. It hit before Edwin could finish the binding and he’d immediately dropped, unconscious, to the floor. Instead of following the witch as she fled, Charles hurried over to Edwin.
Charles distractedly told Niko and Crystal what happened as he skimmed through the page with the spell.
“Do you know what spell Edwin was hit with?” Crystal asked.
Charles shook his head. “Not yet. Obviously it’s not this, this is a potion, but I wonder if it’s not something in the same vein. Love potions alter mind states. What are ghosts but souls with just minds and no bodies?”
“And hearts,” Niko added.
Charles blinked. “And hearts.” He flipped through the book again. “So, not mind manipulation, maybe, but emotional manipulation.”
“How does that help us?” Crystal asked.
“Well, most witches – the ones that aren’t centuries old – tend to focus on one area of expertise. If this witch is playing around with love spells – and she’s young, so she’s not trying to branch out – then it’s probably safe to assume that she’s familiar with magic involving emotion in general. Now, potions are potent but they’re more difficult given that you do have to have the physical ingredients. So most magic users get their start with simple charms and spells that don’t require ingredients. What she threw at Edwin was practiced – she was halfway tied up and didn’t need to do any gestures or need a book. Now, throwing me with raw power, that’s not really a spell but it takes power and desperation, she would have drained herself before she did Edwin’s spell, so it’s also a spell that doesn’t require much magical power put into it. That means the real power comes from her intent and her accuracy.”
Crystal had been making notes while Charles had been talking and flipping through the book. “Okay, so low effort, but well-practiced spell. Likely more about emotions than mental states, but don’t rule it out. Results in unconsciousness. Can affect a ghost.”
“Shit.” Charles threw the book in his hand back onto the settee. “Nothing in there. It’s all potions.”
“What about this?” Niko was at the desk holding up a book. “It’s all about love spells.”
“Yeah?” Charles and Crystal moved closer to read over Niko’s shoulder.
They were silent for a bit as they searched for anything that might look useful. Then Crystal pointed at something on a page and asked, “Do you remember what she said?”
Frowning, Charles tried to recall. “Not specifically. I was further away by then, but it was something short. It felt like it rhymed. Her voice was all sing-songy.”
“‘Now ‘til forever, sleep unbroken; by loving kiss, you are awoken.’”
Niko gasped, almost dropping the book – which Crystal quickly grabbed – as she clutched her hands to her mouth. “True love’s kiss!”
“Bullshit,” Charles said.
“No, wait.” Crystal brought the book closer. “It sounds ridiculous, but it doesn’t take a lot of power. Because, oh.” She frowned. “It requires ingredients for a potion.”
“What kind?” Niko asked.
Crystal frowned. “The same kind as what was in those magic roofies. Hang on.” She looked closer. “It says here, that it requires the aroma of the ingredients. Nothing about ingestion. They’re to strengthen the casting, not deepen the effect on the victim.”
“So, you’re saying the pot she spilled with her next batch of roofies …?” Charles thought he was following where Crystal was leading.
“Gave her the specific boost she needed to cast this spell.” Yep, exactly what he thought.
“Just fucking brilliant.” He pulled away to sink down in the desk chair, feeling unmoored sitting in the seat rather than the arm he often perched on instead.
Crystal hesitated for a moment, then barrelled ahead, as she was wont to do, by asking, “Isn’t this a good thing? We can break the spell.”
“Can we?”
Crystal slammed the book on the desk, making Niko jump and Charles sit up and pay attention to her very impressive glare. “Right. I know we don’t talk about this but Edwin will sleep for all eternity if we don’t, so I’m just going to say it. That boy is in love with you.”
Charles shrank into himself and did his best to avoid eye contact, but Crystal wasn’t having it, grabbing the arms of the desk chair and forcing Charles to look at her.
“Why are you so afraid to think about it?”
“I’m not!” The shrillness of his voice belied his certainty. “Look, I already know, alright. He told me.”
“Okay, so why aren’t you over there now, kissing him awake?”
“’Cause it’s not fair!” That was too honest and Crystal could tell. Charles tried to backtrack. “I mean, what if it doesn’t work? If it’s gotta be me in love with him, not the other way ‘round?”
Crystal continued to stare at him, her gaze a scalpel cutting his heart right in half. “Try again.”
Charles felt like crying. “It’s just not how it’s supposed to go. Our first kiss. Not ’cause of some spell.”
Crystal brought her hand up from the arm of the chair to squeeze Charles’ shoulder. “I’m sorry.” She was, he knew, but she was also incredibly practical. “I wish you’d had more time to sort yourself out, but you know Edwin will give you time once he’s awake. Keeping him asleep, that’s not fair.”
Charles was glad that he couldn’t see over the desk. Having to look at Edwin while he’s making piss-poor excuses not to kiss him was bad enough without the extra guilt of seeing him in that state.
“You’re right,” Charles admitted. “I know you’re right. I’m just …” He let out a low growl of frustration. “Fuck. Okay.”
He rose from the chair, squeezing Crystal’s shoulder in return as thanks for the morale boost. He let Niko hug him, gathering even more strength from her.
Charles moved around the desk and looked down at Edwin for the first time since getting back to the office. He wanted to joke that it would be a shame to wake him – that Edwin’s mind so rarely got a chance to switch off – but he knew he couldn’t delay any further.
“Do you two mind if I do this alone? I don’t want him to wake up and have to react to more than just me.”
“Of course.” Crystal was already moving. “You can tell him I promised at least half a day without teasing,” she said as she disappeared through the door.
Niko was kinder with her parting words. “No matter what happens, we love you. Both of you.” She blew him a kiss and followed after Crystal.
Charles was left alone with the boy he’d spent so long denying he was in love with.
“Fuck.” He knelt down. “I’m so sorry. I know you can’t hear me, but I need to say it now. I’ll say it again later too, but just, know that I am so sorry about how this all turned out.”
He reached down to brush the back of his hand against Edwin’s cheek. He imagined the pale skin beneath was smooth and cool, like porcelain.
“I was thinking about it. What I promised you in hell. It wasn’t a ‘no’ – you had to know that, right?” Charles sighed. “It’s just so much happened. It was just a few weeks and it felt like our entire afterlives got all turned inside out. I felt like I barely knew myself, never mind anything else.”
Edwin had never been so still, except for those moments in hell when he’d thought himself alone and hunted. Charles hated it, but he needed to say just one more thing.
“The only thing I did know for sure was that I loved you and I always will. I just needed a bit of time to reframe what that looks and feels like, you know? I still might need a bit of time after all this. But it’s not doubt, never doubt.”
Charles leaned in close, lips almost touching Edwin’s.
“Never doubt that I haven’t spent hours since you confessed daydreaming about our first kiss. I really, truly, wish it had been something better than this.”
With that final confession, Charles closed his eyes and pressed his lips to Edwin’s in a kiss of true love.
Nothing happened.
At first.
Charles lingered for a few seconds and almost pulled away in dismay, but he felt Edwin twitch beneath him - his lips pulled down into a frown before relaxing into the kiss and gently pressing back.
As soon as he felt the response, Charles gasped and jerked back. He opened his eyes to see Edwin blinking his own open.
“Charles?”
Charles huffed out a relieved breath. “Oh, thank fuck.” He pulled Edwin up into a crushing embrace. Edwin did not hesitate to return the gesture.
“I believe it is you I should thank.”
Charles laughed, a little hysterically, pressing his forehead against Edwin’s neck. “Please don’t.”
“Charles.” Edwin tried to pull away so he could see and address Charles properly, but Charles just clung to him tighter. “Please know there is nothing you need to apologise for.”
“Fuck. You heard all that then?”
Edwin hummed, considering his answer. “What I heard was that you were in a difficult position and the actions you took to aid me caused you some distress.”
At that, Charles did pull back, unable to bear Edwin thinking that the kiss was in any way forced. “No, Edwin, that’s not it at all.” He was still clutching at Edwin’s arms, so he released his grip and slid his hands down so they were holding onto Edwin’s. “I don’t regret doing it, I just wish it had been different. That we were both aware of what was going on and that I wasn’t still so up in my head about it all.”
Edwin twisted their hands around so their fingers interlaced. “That kiss was not a promise. Nor did I speak my confession with any expectation of reciprocation. In fact, the only promise you made in your reply was that you would be at my side forever. I know you love me Charles. And you well know that I love you. Unconditionally. But if you are considering – desiring – that our love also include a romantic element, then how could I possibly offer you anything less than forever for your consideration?”
Charles should be surprised by the tears on his cheeks, but of course Edwin’s love for him made him cry. “See, it’s shit like that that makes me want to hurry up and kiss you like you deserve. But I also know that what you deserve is the truth of my love.” Charles brought their clasped hands up to his lips and kissed the back of Edwin’s hand. “I promise your heart will be safe with me.”
Edwin smiled brilliantly. “I have never and will never doubt that it is.”
“I also promise a do-over,” Charles declared, lightening the mood.
Edwin frowned. “A do-over? Of what?”
“Our first kiss. I mean, that wasn’t really a proper kiss, now was it? More like a counter curse. I mean, wasn’t exactly either of our best work, now was it?”
Edwin gasped theatrically. “I was not even properly conscious, you can hardly hold my technique against me in that state.”
“That’s what I’m saying! Our real first kiss is gonna be amazing. No love spells or second guessing what we’re thinking. Just real honest feelings and both of us properly wanting it and able to do it.”
Edwin smiled at the enthusiastic proposal and the way Charles grew more flustered as his light-hearted words turned more earnest and soft. “I suppose I would like to have a first kiss that I am able – and wanting – to reciprocate. And with the person that I truly desire to share it with.”
Were Charles capable of blushing, the way Edwin was gazing at him would have him flushed from head to toe. It was not a look of aroused desire, but of loving anticipation. Sharing a proper kiss with Charles was something Edwin would wait forever to experience.
Charles didn’t want him to wait forever.
“Right then. We’re agreed. We get a do-over on the first kiss when we’re both ready.”
Edwin nodded and they shook on it, like they did with any other silly deal they came up with to pass the time. It helped Charles relax somewhat, thinking about it in terms of their already existing dynamic. A promise between partners.
“I look forward to the experience.”
So do I, Charles thought, already dreaming of different ways their real first kiss could go.
#fanfic#dead boy detectives#payneland#painland#painland week#painlandweek#post-canon#love spell#first kiss#love confessions#vialana's fic
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