#Our Flag Means Death fic

[ofmdjanuaury]

WELCOME TO HOLESTICE! It’s officially the 21st in Iceland, the country currently showing the hottest, wettest hole, so SHARE YOUR FAVORITE FILTHY SMUTS

[livelydiver]

more ofmd fic recs

Another hype post for some exquisite fics that have lately been living in my head rent-free. Top-shelf and mostly E-rated Gentlebeard modern AUs:

⬥ Mile High Club by @veeagainsttheday [E, 17K] -- You know that feeling where you start a fic and know right away it's going in your list of all time favorites? This is one of those, and I can't stop re-reading it. A heartwarming, instant-soulmates story where Ed and Stede meet as strangers trapped in an American airport after a diverted flight.

⬥ Take a Byte by @oatmilktruther [E, 4K] -- Ed as a top-of-his-game-but-bored-of-it-all hacker harboring a crush on the cute blonde FBI agent who monitors his computer. Adorably funny and hot.

⬥ Up in Smoke by @zombee [T, 4K] -- A charming first/blind date where, under the auspices of a Lucius-directed art project, veteran stoner Ed shows weed-virgin Stede how it's done.

⬥ A Stroke of Luck by wretched_wren [E, 5K] -- Another sweet and funny take on oblivious-Stede discovering new pleasures, this time after he unknowingly signs up himself and best friend Ed for an orgasmic meditation class.

⬥ Restructuring by @elapsed-spiral [E, 50K, WIP] -- Newly penniless Stede navigating life on his own while Ed, a wildly successful but depressed billionaire, falls for him helplessly. My current stop-whatever-I'm-doing-when-a-new-chapter-drops fave, funny and loveable with the bohemian found-family vibes of Phoebe Waller Bridge's Crashing.

⬥ not pickles by smallestchurch [eventually-E, 11K, WIP] -- Instant chemistry between single-and-thriving Ed and his new neighbor, flustered single-dad Stede. In the words of the author's note, "what if what Stede can learn from Ed isn't about a job, but about how to heal? What if Ed's a little farther down that road, as he struggles to figure out What Makes Ed Happy?" What indeed? Get your popcorn, looks like this is gonna be a lovely one.

And a bonus rec for this canon-setting gem:

⬥ All I Have to Pass the Time by sillyteehee [E, 38K] -- If like me you had somehow missed this fic 'til now, you're in for a treat. Set in an alternate canon where Ed's "act of grace" deal is 5 years in prison in exchange for Stede's freedom, this is the series of letters they exchange and all the horny, funny, self-actualizing joys therein.

🏴‍☠️❤️

[margaritaville]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet Characters: Stede Bonnet, Blackbeard | Edward Teach Additional Tags: Daddy Kink, Rough Sex, Kink Exploration, Felching, Bottom Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Top Stede Bonnet, we all know why i wrote this Summary:

If he’s honest, Zaddy is just the sexy tip of the sexy iceberg. An iceberg shaped like a dick, or like… Ed doesn’t know, what else is sexy… Stede chopping a log with an axe. All sweaty (icebergs are wet) and bulging (icebergs… bulge out of the water) and red (maybe he’s losing the plot, here). All this to say, maybe he was joking at first, but it has become dire straits. He’s choking back words, he’s mumbling and stuttering and tripping over sentences. Stede has yet to say anything about it; maybe he thinks this is just a cute quirk of Ed’s that he had yet to notice. 

heaha..... heeyyy..... this is a fic i wrote 🩷 i love you 🩷 

[amuseoffyre]

Alma's curiosity gets the better of her.

[ofmdmatelotagezine]

🏴‍☠️🌈PREORDERS OPEN🌈🏴‍☠️

Preorders for our OFMD matelotage-themed zine are now open! We have 80+ pages of fantastic art and writing, for a variety of ships, from an amazing selection of contributors, as well as some wonderful merch!

Ships featured in the zine: Ed/Stede, Ed/Izzy, Stede/Izzy, Stede/Ed/Izzy, Lucius/Pete, Archie/Jim/Oluwand, Mary/Evelyn, Izzy/Spanish Jackie, Wee John/Frenchie, Izzy/Sam Bellamy

Our offerings are:

Zine: Physical Zine: $19 Digital Zine: $9 'Honeymoon Edition' NS//FW add-on (digital only): $7 Merch: Sticker sheets (2): $6 Enamel Pin: $12 Ship acrylic charm: $9 Wedding cake shaker charm: $15 Bundles: Merch Bundle: $29 Full Bundle: $49 Note: The physical zine (and its digital PDF) are entirely SFW, while the 'Honeymoon Edition' is entirely NS//FW and a separate add-on that must be purchased on its own and not included in any bundle. You must be 18+ to purchase it, and by purchasing this add-on, you agree that you are over 18 years of age.

Preorders will be open Dec 18 - Jan 28. All proceeds will be donated to Rainbow Railroad.

GET YOUR PIRATE MARRIAGE GOODS HERE

[raz-writes-the-thing]

Show Business (OFMD Drabble)

Stede Bonnet x GN!Reader / requests are open

Summary: Stede is teaching you a thing or two about piracy.

Fic type: fluff, semi-crack

OFMD: @catlynharper (send an ask to be added to a tag list!)

___ ___ ___ ___ ___

“It’s all in the wrist, see?” Stede says, demonstrating a rather dangerous-looking flick of the pistol in his hand. He’s teaching you about the flare of dramatics needed when engaging in piracy. 

Apparently, it’s mostly show business. You’re not too sure about how true that actually is, but Stede is your captain, and you’ve found it’s usually best to go along with whatever it is he has to say. It’s not like he’s a ruthless bastard, anyway, so there’s no harm in it if he wants to show you how to wave a gun around fancily. 

“The trick is to keep them looking where you want them to look,” Stede said conspiratorially. That much you agreed with. And it was true too, because with the way Stede was waving the gun about, it was hard to focus on anything else. 

Particularly when various parts of your body passed through the sights of the barrel every few seconds as Stede prattled on.

Then, Stede shot the gun straight up into the air, narrowly missing the mast of the ship. 

“Pay attention,” he barked, and for a split second, you could understand from the other side what it felt like to be raided. Then his face softened again into a grin. “See? All about the show of it.” 

You swallowed thickly, nodding. Sure, yeah, you were beginning to see the point he was making. 

“Right, so a bit like this, then?” You asked, getting a better grip on your own pistol and flicking it to the side haphazardly. Stede tapped the muzzle of his loaded gun against his lip and you sucked in a horrified breath. 

“Yes, like that- maybe try it one more time with a little more pizzaz, what do you reckon?” Stede replied, thankfully removing the gun away from the general vicinity of his face.

“Sure, if I don’t have a heart attack first,” you muttered to yourself. 

“Eh?” Stede asked innocently, positioning your hand where he wanted it for your next attempt. 

“Nothing,” you sighed.

[ipomoea-batatas]

OOPS I FINALLY PUBLISHED THE FIRST CHAPTER

[gay-baby-brig]

For anyone still reading my ofmd fic, here are some visuals I did for reference for chapter seven!

Here's the link to the Jim POV Ouizzy (slightly cracky) fic if you're interested: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51966022

[cuddlytogas]

[fic] The Great Suit Loot of 1718 (Our Flag Means Death)

The time has come, and the Auxiliary Wardrobe Zine @stedebonnetzine has come to an end! Naturally, I went over the very word limit I helped to set, so AO3 gets an extra section/extended edition.

Ed/Stede, with background Archie/Jim/Olu and Lucius/Pete; rated T, no warnings; 5054 words.

After giving up the "cursed" red suit, Stede longs for something equally fancy to replace it with. As it turns out, there are plenty of relevant skills and supplies on the Revenge, and what they don't have, well - they are pirates, after all... A little excursion into 18th-century fashion and the power of handicrafts, against the background of Stede and Ed's healing relationship. Set in a pocket universe post-2x05 where there's, like, at least six weeks between that and episode 6.

READ ON AO3

Hugest of kudos to the wonderful @tsunderejon for coming up with and running the zine! The full thing is available for free on her Ko-fi now (SFW and NSFW editions), which you should absolutely check out for all the other fabulous works! And if you'd like to donate to Care for Gaza anyway, I encourage you to do so.

[erosrevenge]

Movie I've Seen Before 🔗

An OFMD Blockbuster Inspired AU

[yergink]

Hi, hello!! I wrote a very silly fic about Ed getting trapped on his fishing boat with a spider (the spider is a metaphor). Consider checking it out <3

2.7 words, rated T

“Fucking—shit!” Ed yells, flinching away from the little monster with enough force that he nearly capsizes the rickety old rowboat.

Water splashes, the dinghy’s nose flies into the air, and Ed hastily grabs the gunwale and lurches his weight forward to keep the damn thing upright. By the time he’s done that and the boat’s settled back to calm, he’s lost track of the fucking spider.

[downstarr]

Versus, an OFMD Spy AU - COMPLETE!

40k and some months later, my homage to action-romance spy thrillers is complete!

Versus (40453 words) by downstar Chapters: 15/15 Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV) Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet, Blackbeard | Edward Teach & Israel Hands Characters: Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Stede Bonnet, Israel Hands, Ching Shih | Zheng Yi Sao, Chauncey Badminton, Nigel Badminton, Declan Finch Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Spy - Freeform, Alternate Universe - James Bond Fusion, Alternate Universe - Our Flag Means Death Fusion, Enemies to Lovers, Spy thriller, Action/Adventure, Action & Romance, Gun Violence, Blood and Violence, spy vs spy - Freeform, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Action, Intrigue, Espionage, Jealous Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Seduction, Jealous Stede Bonnet, Trust Issues, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Sharing a Bed, Slow Burn, spy gear, Disguise, Travel, World Travel, Trains, On the Run, Mystery, BAMF Stede Bonnet, BAMF Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Falling In Love, Blackbeard | Edward Teach Loves Stede Bonnet, Stede Bonnet Loves Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Competent Stede Bonnet Series: Part 7 of Gentlebeard Modern AUs Summary: Edward Teach, codename Blackbeard works for an intelligence and assasination agency for-hire. He's sent to kill the socialite Stede Bonnet after seducing him, but discovers that the man is much more than he appears to be. He's actually an MI6 agent, codename Gentleman, hiding in plain sight. Things quickly go off the rails when an attempt on both of their lives leaves them wondering who they can trust. As they become an unlikely duo, they are forced to reckon with the chemistry between them - and how that complicates their adversarial relationship. --- This fic follows in the grand tradition of James Bond, Salt, Mr. and Mrs. Smith, The Long Kiss Goodnight and Lucky Number Slevin. Featuring action in the tradition of spy thrillers, with a healthy dose of queer romance and an enemies-to-lovers arc.

[thetardigrape]

Irredeemable Bastards

Chapters: 1/9 Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Israel Hands/Lucius Spriggs Characters: Israel Hands, Lucius Spriggs, Samuel "Black Sam" Bellamy, Original Characters Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Heist, Rivals to Lovers, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Sharing Clothes, Pining while fucking, Pickpocket Lucius, Tech Wizard Izzy, Slow Burn, alternating pov Art: @thatskindarough Summary:

At court-ordered community service, Lucius meets Izzy, a hot older guy on a motorcycle. They hit it off pretty well, even if Izzy refuses to give Lucius his number.

But when Lucius runs into Izzy again while he's casing the site of his next big job, alarm bells ring. What if Izzy figures out what Lucius is doing? What if he leads the cops to him?

Or what if he's there doing the exact same thing?

For the OFMD Reverse Big Bang 2023

[margaritaville]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet Characters: Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Stede Bonnet Additional Tags: Doctor Roleplay, Exhibitionism, Trans Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Anal Fingering, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Soft Dom Stede Bonnet Summary:

Ed stares down at his hands wrapped around the edge of the examination table, a spider and a snake smiling up at him, and ponders how he got here.

Completely objectively, Stede is a little fucked up about sex. Ed loves him, would never judge him for any of his ideas. Even if some of them are a little silly at times. And, fuck, Ed is fucked up about sex. He doesn’t know how to level his past with his current attitudes when it comes to sex. Wanting to get hurt, wanting to be hurt. He’s never figured out how to rationalize it. Especially when it comes to sex with Stede, who should by all accounts be soft and gentle in their bedroom. Stede, who is a little fucked up about sex. 

we did it guys!!! fucked up doctor stede written and posted!! please god be gentle with me lmao.

[amuseoffyre]

After a hectic weekend, Stede is looking forward to some Alone Time with his boyfriend.

[writerpey]

Hiiii!! Though you haven’t been around long, you’re one of my favorite headcanon writers on tumblr! Could I request a Caregiver!Stede Bonnet with reader if you have time? Your work is incredible :’)

hello dearie! that is so so kind of you! <3 stede is one of my favourite cgs to headcanon ever! hope u enjoy (I almost wanted to title this one in cursive because it’s so him)

Caregiver!Stede Bonnet x Little!Reader Headcanons

He is absolutely the type of cg to make everything as fun as possible. You want to play hide and seek? He’s creating an elaborate story to go alongside it with mermaids and pirate treasure. You ask him to do a craft? You better believe he’s sent one of the crew to shore to fetch clay and paints.

Speaking of crafts, he’ll literally display or wear anything and everything you make him while regressed. In fact, he urges you to seek out any creativity you do or don’t have! Once you wanted to make him an outfit, so you stole away to his secret closet (one of your favourite places on the whole ship) and splattered crimson paint all over one of his white, frilly shirts. When you brought it to him with a proud look on your face, he gasped and picked you up, twirling both you and the shirt around. I love it! You are so talented, little one. He wore the shirt every day for the next week, even when you weren’t regressed.

Because he comes from a very humble background (total sarcasm applicable here), Stede has mastered the art of comfort, as he likes to call it with a grand gesture. (Not to be confused with the… other art, he once said.) You can bet you’ll never be uncomfortable when you’re around him, physically or emotionally. Squirmy baby that just can’t sleep? Well, of course Stede has an answer for that. He’ll take you by the hand and lead you to his closet, letting you pick any item of clothing that has the most comfortable texture for little you. He’ll offer you hot tea or warm milk, and he loves nothing more than bringing a cup to your lips and helping you drink while you rest your head against his chest.

Stede is also a huge fan of bedtime stories. Apart from his tales to the crew, he loves adding a dramatic bit of theatre to your bedtime routine. He tailors his stories exactly to your mood, softening his voice and letting the sound of water hitting the hull of the ship lull you to sleep, or entertaining you with an hour long epic about the adventures of Blackbeard.

Oh, he’s so incredibly in tune with your emotional needs. He rarely falters in his ability to understand what you need, and he’s able to immediately tell how old you’re feeling just by being in your presence. Feeling smaller today, darling? That’s quite alright. I’ll be right here with you.

He frequently encourages you to play with the other crew members when you’re little as well. He’ll spot you watching Frenchie play music and will take you by the hand to sit with the other, smiling proudly when you let go and clap along to Frenchie’s music happily.

Playtime is always the best time with Stede, although sometimes he can get carried away. Once during hide and seek he jumped out and startled you so bad you burst into tears on the spot. He’s very quick to apologize and soothe your ailments, wiping your tears from your cheeks and promising you a treat from below deck.

Stede will always make sure you��re a happy baby, and if not, he’s always at his best when comforting and understanding your little side.

<3