#Or ask me things about my Many Thoughts and I shall share them

[animnightmare]

Another Gravity Falls AU idea I had:

During blendens game, somone points out they should get two time wishes because they both beat blendin. So they do. They give one to soos, and keep the other for themselves. Obviously, Dipper wants to use it to meet the Author, and I cant think of anything Mabel would want bad enough at this point in time to really get in his way.

Now this could go multiple ways.

A. they hoard the wish like a limited resource in a video game (same) and it eventually gets used to either end weirdmageddon or stop it from happening in the first place (Mabel using it to wish for more summer instead of accidently dealing with Bill)

or B, what I think is more likely, Dipper wishes to meet the author.

This, too, could go multiple ways. Ford comes back way earlier in the show, OR...

Dipper gets sent to another dimension.

For the stories sake, he'd left Journal 3 at home that day- or perhaps made a copy of some sort, I can imagine him copying everything in it down in another book due to his obsession with it. Either way, Mabel and Stan work together, now having journals 1 and 3.

And as for Dipper, well, he meets Ford. In the middle of some sort of battle, most likely. There are countless different things this could lead to, but mostly bonding, I think. Bonding and Truama from running away from otherwordly horrors.

Ford tells Dipper about his experience with Stan, and Dipper tells Ford about his own. Dipper being a more emotionally intelligent version of Ford probobly gets him to get over at least a little of his resentment.

[gingerteawrites]

Undeserving - Where the shadow of the past looms over Diluc’s present

A/N: I'm baaaaaack. This one has been in the works for a minute, and has taken on many different forms, but here I grace you with a work about my OG Genshin husband. Please enjoy and let me know what you think! Not beta read

Content: ANGSTTTT, Husband Diluc, relationship troubles.

Word count: 1.5K

Diluc Ragvindr had convinced himself that the last thing he wanted on this earth was to start a family. The tale of his own being torn apart would never not be a sore wound, one that incessantly throbbed, one that he believed would never heal.

The idea of being ripped away from any sort of attachment was repulsive, as was the possibility of growing estranged from loved ones. Familial bonds were simply too sensitive of a topic. Too painful of an ache.

You on the other hand, had always dreamed of the wonders of marriage. Of a sacred contract of love and care. And after years of timid courting, Diluc did what he thought would never be possible. He gave into the new, selfish desires of your company. Of an attachment to you. Of what he could be WITH you.

Diluc got married to you, the love of his life. Something he felt was simultaneously the best and worse thing he could ever have done. It did not take too long for him to become consumed with dread of history repeating himself. The potential of all the failings of this new attachment loomed over him like shadows of the abyss.

While you enjoyed the newly-wed bliss, the joy of finally being united with your love. Your husband spiraled into more and more agitated thoughts. Yes, this union was something he had wanted. So badly it kept him awake at night. He had wanted to have you for himself. And him for you. But everything he kept inside him created a dangerous brew of dark thoughts that now made him restless.

He tried to hide this all from you. Oh how ashamed he felt. Staying at Angel’s share a little longer than usual, leaving the house before you woke up for sparring exercises, coming up with things to do when you tried to bring him lunch as a surprise.

It all came as a shock to your system. You had always known that Diluc was not openly affectionate, but he had never truly avoided you. Your romance was one of timid touches and whispered sweet words, of acts of service and long evening walks, but never of hiding and silence. It drove you mad.

You tried to be the bigger person and give him space. Afterall, you knew — if only partly— of his family’s woes and him not being used to have someone so close. But after weeks of this game of hide and seek, you had had enough.

One Friday night, with your own spiralling thoughts, you ordered all the house servants to take the weekend off, and waited for Diluc, resolve hard as steel to get through this issue.

When he silently cracked the door open, he jumped at the sight of you, gaze fixed on him with your arms crossed, a single candle on the nightstand illuminating your face.

“Hey,” he greeted quietly, closing the door before he started to take off his coat.

“Hey,” you responded, lips pursed as you watched him. These were the first words you had exchanged all week.

He almsot felt small under your gaze, taking off his outer garments and gloves which he set on his dresser and turned to face you with a sigh.

“I’m sorry I’ve been quite busy recently,” he tried to appease you, sitting down on the edge of the bed. “I am exhausted, shall we sleep?”

Your brows furrowed in exasperation, and you unfolded your arms.

“Not so fast Diluc.” He froze at your tone, sharp, cutting through the dry air. “Is that truly all you wish to say?” You asked, feeling yourself growing shaky with all the contained emotions. Confusion. Anger. Fear.

“What…” he turned fully towards you “What do you mean?” he asked hesitantly.

You took in a shaky breath, closing your eyes to calm your nerves. When you reopened them, you noticed your husband’s slightly hunched position, his bangs falling over his eyes. That hair that always reminded you of a warm hearth. Something to grow fond of, now looked dull in the pale candelight. And the sight made your heart ache.

“Diluc please don’t play dumb with me. What is going on?” You ask, leaning towards him “You’re avoiding me.” The words leave a bitter taste in your mouth and your lip curls in distaste.

“Did I do something wrong?” You add after a pause, the sadness breaking through your tone.

“No, no, no, it’s nothing you have done.” He jumps in, guilt gripping at him hearing your pain. It was much easier to rationalize his behavior when all he saw was your sleeping form when he left in the mornings and came back late at night. But now faced with you awake, his chest felt unbelievably tight.

“Then what is it?” You ask, steadying your voice once again.

Diluc sighed, his fingers gripping the sheets beneath him. He then raises his head so his eyes can meet yours, the curtains of his hair falling away from his face, and you see the conflict in his eyes. The pain of something he is keeping locked away in his being.

“Please talk to me.” You whisper, covering his hand with yours.

“I…” he pauses, feeling ashamed of his thoughts. How could he even justify his actions to you. “Maybe… maybe us getting married was a mistake.”

The words pierce through you like a blade, and your entire body stiffens, mouth agape, eyes open wide. You feared your ears betrayed you. “What did you say?” you hear yourself ask.

His hand reached for yours, and you jerked away before he could reach you. His lips opened and closed multiple times, like he was trying to find words.

Recovering from the initial shock of his words, and all you felt was an overwhelming sense of anger bubble out of you. “Is there someone else?” You asked through gritted teeth. The possibility would absolutely obliterate you, but you had to know.

“No, I could never.” He rushed to say again. ”Then what is this about, Diluc!?” You almost yelled, chest heaving. You did not recognize the man standing before you.

“I…” he stammered again, brows downturned, biting his lower lip. “You just deserve someone better.” He spat out, his entire body tense. “You’re just too good for me. And I am sorry it took me until now to realize it. No.” He stopped himself. “I knew all along, but I was selfish.” He shook his head. “I just can’t make this work.” He sucked in a deep breath, his voice growing meek.

Your hands fall against the mattress, fully taking in his words. Words that did nothing to quell your anger, only adding more fuel to it.

“And who made that call?” You ask, loud voice resonating through the room. He looked up at you with wide eyes. “Who decided that huh?” You leaned towards him. “Not me.” You concluded bitterly.

“But.” He says, eyes locked with yours.

“But nothing, Diluc.” You punctuated, voice firm again. “I think you are deserving of me.” You point to yourself. “I love you Diluc. Do you not?”

“Of course I do.” He adds, closing the distance between you two, his fingers finding yours again. “I just don’t want this to end badly. I don’t want us to end badly.” He confesses.

“But don’t you think we’re worth the risk?” You ask, searching his eyes. “Don’t you think that our love is worth trying?” You emphasize.

He looks down at your linked fingers before his gaze returns to you. “I am a weak man. Weaker than I look, certainly. I’m scared of losing you.”

“So you decide to push me away?” You ask in disbelief, to which he stays silent. “Then I refuse to go. We are going to make this work, whether you believe you are strong enough for it or not.” You conclude.

Diluc looks at you, your eyes shining with determination and unshed tears. A testament to your own strenght. An announcement of his own weakness. How could he be Mondstat’s defender, working to uphold the foundation of his city if he could not work for you. The realization sunk into his stomach with a nauseating weight. He was chosing the easy way out. He was hurting you and himself because of fear.

“I am sorry.” He chokes out, pulling you into him, engulfing you in his warmth for a hug. “I really am not deserving of you.” He adds, his voice trembling as he buried his head into your neck.

“Just promise.” You wrap your arms around him “Promise you’ll try.”

He pulls away from you, his hands moving up to hold your cheeks, his eyes burning with new certainty, new determination. “I swear to you.” His thumbs move in circles against your skin, wiping away your tears that have started to fall. “I promise. I stake my life on this. On us.” And he brings his lips to yours to seal this commitment. The past was dark and seemed all-engulfing, but he would not let it overshadow this present with you.

Comment and reblogs are much appreciated :))

[autumnleaves1991-blog]

My Home Is You Part 1/3

A/N: I am so obsessed with this movie, I've seen it twice. Enjoy. Leave a comment, like, or reblog if you've enjoyed it. Thank you to @kingliam2019 for requesting.

Fandom: The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare

Pairing: Gus March-Phillips x Female Reader

Warnings: 18+ for language, Nazi's, canon typical violence, possible spoilers for the movie, and mentions of sexual assault.

Part 2 Part 3

“What’s that?” Freddy points to the lump behind Gus’s coat. 

“Nothing,” Gus shrugs, “shall we.” 

“We shall not,” Freddy shouts exasperated, “it’s moving! Unless you became the hunchback of Notre Dame in the ten minutes I left you, you got something hidden behind your back!” 

“He’s got a point, boss,” Hazy shrugs. 

Gus sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose, “I think the jig is up,” he pushes the coat up and out you pop from behind his side, disappearing behind him with a shriek. 

“Where the hell did you find a woman?!” Freddy looks around, then goes silent putting two and two together, “Oh, I see.” 

“She’s coming with us,” Gus reaches behind him and you grasp his hand, trembling hard at being surrounded by so many men. His touch is warm, and you take a moment to breathe before stepping out from behind him at your full height. 

“Hello,” you whisper, giving an awkward wave. 

Gus lets go of your hand and claps making you jump and his face quickly turns apologetic, “Fuck, sorry about that, love. These are the boys,” he points to each man giving you a quick rundown on his merry band of miscreants. He turns to you with a proud smile, “I never did catch your name.” 

“Let me get this straight,” Freddy puts his hands on his hips, sticking out one finger towards Gus, “you find a random woman hidden in a Nazi garrison, fight your way out with her, and decide to bring her with us, without asking her name first?” 

“Probably did it a bit backward,” Gus rubs the back of his head with a chuckle, “but I’m making up for it now.” 

You clear your throat and they all turn towards you as you say your name, a small smile spreading across your face when they repeat it to you. “Welcome to the team,” Anders bows before putting his bow over his shoulder, “shall we get back to the boat, we got somewhere we need to be.” 

“After you,” Gus says, frowning when he realizes Anders is already halfway back to the boat. “That’s the spirit Lassen, lead the way!” Gus slings an arm around your shoulder and helps you walk, it’s slow and painful; your foot aches with every step but you keep it to yourself. These men have already done enough liberating you and agreeing to take you with them. The last thing they need is for you to be injured. But nothing gets past Gus. 

He doesn’t ask, just leans down and swings you up into his arms. You gasp, quickly wrapping your arms around his neck. “Wh-what are you doing?” you whisper. 

“You’re limping,” he whispers back, almost like two children sharing a secret, he grins. “I’m not about to let you hurt yourself worse before I can take a look at your injuries.” 

“I’m fine,” you bite your lip looking away, “you’ve done enough already.” 

Gus stops, the others moving around him to toss the rope down the cliff side, “Darling, I know you’ve just spent gods knows how long with the worst creatures imaginable but not all of us are monsters.” 

“I didn’t say you were,” you turn back to him, and catch your breath when you notice how close he is. “I don’t think you’re a monster at all,” you whisper, swallowing hard, “I just don’t want to cause you any more trouble.” 

“Do you know what I thought when I saw you tucked behind that wall crying and holding your ears?” You shake your head, and he grins, “She looks like just my kind of trouble.” 

The first smile in months spreads like wildfire across your face and you nod. “Ready?” Apple interrupts, “We managed a pulley to get her down.” 

Gus nods, lifting you into the makeshift pulley and working with Apple to lower you down. When you reach the ground Lassen lifts you into his arms while Gus and Apple come down and re-wrap the rope around their arms. 

When finished, Gus reaches his arms out for you and Anders smiles, tugging you closer. “I think I’ll hold on to her for a while. Give you a break,” he looks down giving you a conspiratorial wink. 

“Give me back my damsel,” Gus holds out his arms wider, “I’m not going to ask again.” 

“Who are you calling a damsel?” you ask, crossing your arms over your chest, and Lassen lets out a joyful cheer. 

“You tell him, honey,” he turns walking with you back towards the dinghy. His glee makes a ghost of a laugh appear in your throat before you toss your head back in delight. 

Apple pats Gus on the back as he climbs into the boat and you look back to see Gus smiling, a full-blown smile just for you and you rest your head on your arm and look back at him. “It’s good to see you laugh,” he mouths, and your cheeks ache from smiling as he sits down and begins to row. 

“Row row, row your boat,” Lassen mumbles under his breath, the lull of the waves and the feeling of safety making your eyes droop. “Oh, the little lamb is tired, no?” he whispers in your ear, “You rest, no one will harm you ever again.” 

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” you repeat your fathers words aloud. 

“Little lamb, with the way Gus is looking at me right now. You don’t have to worry about anyone hurting you for the rest of your life.” He rubs a hand over your arm and chuckles, mumbling, “if looks could kill.” 

“He won’t always be there,” your words are drowsy as you burrow deep into his arms, letting out a yawn. 

“Ah, little lamb, I highly doubt that,” Lassen chuckles softly, before you feel yourself being lifted into anothers arms. The scent of smoke, cologne, and leather lull you into a deeper sense of calm and you snuggle into his arms. Gus looks down, brushing a knuckle over your cheek and committing your face to memory as you fall asleep, breathing softly. “Take a picture,” Lassen teases, “it will last longer.” 

“Her cell was next to mine,” Apple interrupts, “she was always so nice to me. Tried to patch me up the best she could through the bars. I tried to return the favor, everytime they brought her….fuck I can still hear the screaming.” The men are silent, the waves crashing against the dinghy as they get closer and closer to the boat. 

“Well,” Freddy clears his throat, “she’s safe now.” They reach the boat, helping Gus aboard and watching as he disappears below deck with you. 

“Heaven help the man who tries to take her away from him,” Hayes clears his throat, and the rest climb aboard and continue on toward Fernando Po. 

Below deck, Gus tucks you into his bunk and watches the rise and fall of your chest before he moves towards the end of the bed, and lifts the blanket to remove your shoe. He curses when he sees the bruising around your ankle. He removes the other shoe and has to control his breathing when he sees the same markings; shackles. 

“Never again,” he whispers, grabbing bandages and ointments and applying them to your ankles. The bottom of your foot is no better, and he grabs the tweezers removing several shards of glass and bandaging your feet. “No wonder you were limping,” he talks to himself. He takes the next twenty minutes checking over the parts of your body he can see, treating every little cut and bruise. When he’s finished he walks over to a basin of water and washes his hands before pouring a glass of scotch and sitting down at the map. 

He loses track of the time, his head snapping up from the table when the screaming starts. He pushes the chair out, climbing over the table to grab your thrashing body. He repeats your name over and over again till your eyes pop open, gasping you reach towards him throwing your arms around his neck and letting out a sob. “I thought it was a dream,” you sob brokenly into his skin, almost crawling into his lap, “I dreamed I was back there,” you take a deep breath, “that they were…” 

“No,” he shakes his head, pulling back to put both hands on your face, his thumbs brushing the tears from your eyes. “You’re safe,” he repeats once, then twice, “do you hear me?” 

“I’m safe,” you repeat back, the tears silently streaming down your face. From the stairs, the men stare at the scene before them. “Uh oh,” Freddy shakes his head, and the others turn to him with various questions. “Look at them,” he points back to you and Gus, “he looks at her like he just realized what love was.” 

“I didn’t know you were a romantic, Freddy,” Apple claps him on the shoulder with a laugh. “I’m not,” he shrugs, “but I’m also not blind. That right there,” he points a finger, “that’s love if I ever saw it. You just wait, I bet you ten pounds she goes home with him at the end of this mission.” 

“I’ll take that bet,” Hayes tosses over his shoulder. 

Apple raises a brow, “you don’t think they’ll end up getting hitched once we’re home.” 

“That wasn’t the bet,” Hayes grins, “he bet that she’ll go home with him at the end of the mission. I think we’ll either be dead or in jail so she probably won’t be going home with him.” 

“Never bet against yourself, Hazy,” Freddy shakes his head, “have I taught you nothing.” 

“It’s your deal,” Henry reminds him before shrugging past to go back to the deck, “let’s go, give them some privacy.” 

Their steps recede and Gus rubs the last of your tears away, “do you want something to eat?” 

“Yes,” you nod, moving from his lap and tugging the blanket around your shoulders. When you step down, you quickly look at the bandages around your feet and ankle before meeting his eyes, “thank you,” you whisper, “for everything.” 

“You don’t have to thank me,” he puts the kettle on, “any decent human being would do the same.” You sit down at the table seeing the maps and confidential files spread across the surface. Gus grabs the papers and puts them into a pile before putting down a cup of steaming tea before you. 

“I have a few questions,” you wrap your hands around the cup, absorbing some of the warmth. 

He takes a sip, blowing the top with a grin, “I’d be disappointed if you didn’t.” 

“What were you doing in the Garrison?” 

“Rescuing Appleyard,” he takes another sip, “we needed him.” 

“For what?” 

Gus puts down his cup, crossing his arms over his chest and your heart beats a little louder at how strained the fabric is over his bulging biceps. You quickly take a sip of your tea, burning your tongue when you meet his eyes, seeing amusement sparkle. “Enjoying the show?” you cough, the tea spilling down the front of your dress. “Shit,” he shouts, grabbing a towel and pulling out the chair beside you to sit down. You grab it and soak up the liquid from your dress, the top sinking lower with each tug. 

When you’re finished you glance up to see his eyes on your chest before he quickly averts his eyes and clears his throat. “Enjoying the show?” you smile softly when he coughs and lets out a strained laugh. 

“Very much,” he turns his head and your mouth goes dry. Neither says anything for a moment before he goes back to the pile and tugs out the map. You take another sip of tea to prevent being parched when he spreads it over the table. “We’re on a secret mission for the English government.” “Come again?” you clear your throat, sitting up straighter. 

He grins, “We are on an unsanctioned, unofficial mission to destroy a ship and two tug boats holding enough supplies to supply the German U-boats for six months. We destroy those ships and we regain control of the Atlantic.” 

“And how do you plan to do that?” 

“Explosives,” he pushes a tin of biscuits towards you, “tons of explosives. What do you think?” 

You sit there for a moment, processing everything he’s said before reaching into the tin and pulling out a ginger snap. You dip it into your cup before taking a bite with a grin, “where can I sign up?” 

[onlyseokmins]

show and tell • l.s.m.

Pairing: lee seokmin x afab!reader Genres: smut (minors dni!), best friends/idiots to lovers!au Warnings: swearing, lotssss of teasing/switch dynamics, tickling, reader is obsessed w/ seokmin's body, they're idiots your honor and they're a lil bit in L-word 🤮, mingyu thrown under the bus as always, ONE BAD PUN BC I THINK I'M FUNNY, sex is as silly as me, BIG COCK SEOK 🗣️ like he's fucking huge okay, oral (both rec. kind of), attempt at 69 but seok's a menace the entire time, fingering, CRYING/TEARS, possession, biting, marking, multiple orgasms, squirting, lil bit of cumplay ig?, mentions of prev partners, overstim... i think that's it lmk if i missed smth 🥵😰 WC: 6.5k A/N: um so this is the most self-indulgent thing i dared to post you're WELCOME i shall now go die in a hole to never be seen ever again... happy belated birthday to the loml ugh ty to all the frens that let me sob in their dms and to @onlymingyus for helping me with a damn title 💖

The commonly shared belief among your friend group was that Seokmin is abnormally soft when it comes to you.

You thought they were full of shit. 

The bestest buddy in the world was also the softest ray of morning sunshine to ever exist in general. You could barely count on one hand the number of people he genuinely ever showed disdain towards or didn't get along with. All in all — it was extremely hilarious in your opinion because Seokmin's fluffy personality greatly contrasted with his lean, sharp physique. 

Ironically, the main reason you ended up in this position.

Just moments before, you were on his bed and caged between his arms. The dog tag necklace you'd gifted, engraved with his birth date and initials, swinging in the same rhythm that your heart rapidly beats with the small space separating your bodies. A sly grin raises the corners of his lips, the long fingers of his left-hand creeping up to trail lightly at your sides.

"I know you have abs."

Seokmin's hands fly up to wrap defensively around his body, though all in good jest. "You can't just ask a dude how many abs he has!"

"And you can't lie to me by saying you don't have any! Do you know how many of your dude-bros have blabbed about your crazy gym routine to me? Can you even guess how many girls bitched at me 'cause you weren't shirtless at my pool party? As if that's my fault?"

"But it's mine?"

"No, all I have to do is prove them wrong. So, show me the goods!"

You sucked at making up your mind — what to eat, what to wear, what to watch, what to do — okay, but who doesn't? It's something Seokmin was very familiar with, hence him always having to pick up wherever you left off. He also knows just as well that once you've settled on something, you'll see it through to the very end. Eventually. 

Which normally works out in his favor except in moments like now. So he resorts to a different preventative measure — tickling the decisiveness right out of you.

Like hell you'll let him do what he wants.

Maybe the whispers about him being soft for you were right. After all, it's to your utter benefit when you push at his shoulder. Only a bit unbalanced, he easily falls onto his side and you scramble to climb on top of him at record speed, one arm pinning Seokmin's wrists against the pillow beneath his head. 

Unfortunately, this looks like one of your 3,718,493,842 very bad choices in life. Once again, something you didn't think all the way through. Sure, you've bested Seokmin at light wrestling and play-fighting before — back when you were toddlers and all he did was cry.

Now, at adult ages, it seems like a horrible, terrible, very bad idea to have him beneath you. Your fingers play with the hem of his black t-shirt that's ridden up ever so slightly, unbearablely close to the leather band of his silver belt buckle. 

Seokmin's pupils are blown wide as he looks up at you with a strange, almost starry-eyed look of surprise. Black bangs flipped up across the dark gray of his blanket, silver chain askew shining against his collarbones, mouth slightly ajar.

Suddenly you're hyper-aware of sitting right on top of him, completely obliterating the distance between your bodies earlier, and leaving absolutely nothing to the imagination from what you can feel nestled in between your legs. 

"Would it be inappropriate of me to take your shirt off right now?" you can't help but ask.

He laughs, all breathless and high-pitched like he does when he's nervous. "You're asking for permission?"

"Seokmin," you whine and shift your hips in protest without thinking. Another bad move. Oops. "I'm trying to be polite."

"You have me pinned to my bed with the intent to strip me and you're worried about being polite?"

"Oh, please, you could easily break free."

It's true. His wrists twitch a bit under your grasp, almost like he's attempting to do just that but you're faster once more. Or he's just letting you have your way with him. Whatever the case, your other hand firmly holds both of his down which only brings your faces closer together.

"Don't move."

"Okay," Seokmin agrees and licks his lips, "at least you know what consent means."

"Are you consenting?"

"Depends on what to."

"Me taking off your shirt."

"… Should I be flattered?"

"Very."

Brown eyes close, his brow furrowing. For a minute, you think you've accidentally taken things too far and are about to quickly apologize and backpedal before things backfire until his lips quirk up and Seokmin snorts.

"Never imagined you'd be stripping me like this."

You would agree because what the hell? All this for some abs? But the way he says it makes you pause.

"Have you imagined this before?"

Expecting him to panic or something, you're even more taken aback when he bites his lip like he's holding back more laughter. 

"And what if I have? You'll be offended even if I lie." 

You narrow your eyes challengingly while his sparkle. "Are you… flirting with me?" 

"That is not how I flirt but okay." 

"You're being weird. Weird weird. Like super-duper weird." 

"Says the one soaking my jeans, right now." 

You want to scream. Instead, you let out a scandalized gasp, eyes widening. The effort it takes to bolt away means you must release Seokmin. Something that doesn't even cross your mind with the shame heating up your cheeks, mortification setting off every sirening alarm in your nervous system.

Your first mistake.

Countless other mistakes will be made after this, but looking back — could they really be watered down to just a mistake after the end results? Why you're even so embarrassed in the first place is beyond you. And your best friend has zero intentions of letting you get away from him.

The minute Seokmin's hands are freed, one flies to keep your hips pressed against his while the other gently braces your back. Lifting his torso up with insane core strength he clearly was lying about not having, you have no choice but to wrap an arm instinctively around his neck like a koala. Your other hand curls into a fist, clinging against the fabric straining with the flex of his chest muscles while simultaneously attempting to push him back in a futile effort.

"Breathe," Seokmin murmurs in mild concern. His eyes crinkle as he smiles encouragingly. "Breathe for me, babe."

You hadn't even realized you were holding your breath. If you inched any closer forward, your nose would brush against his, and leaning too far back would end up with him on top of you again.

"This is all your fault, babe."

"You're the one that started this in the first place, babe."

"All I wanted was to see your abs," your voice drops to a pathetic whisper, "babe."

"All you had to do was ask, silly."

"I did!"

To your horror, he leans in even closer with a devious smirk so his nose brushes tenderly against yours. "For yourself. Not others."

"What… what are you playing at Seokmin?"

"It's like you misinterpret everything I do on purpose."

"I — "

"If you think I'm just playing around you're sorely mistaken."

A beat of silence. "Then what are you doing?"

"Nothing," he says innocently even though the hand on your back trails upwards and not-so-innocently unclasps the bra underneath your shirt. 

Your jaw drops. Of course, your modest top is still on and the shoulder straps keep your undergarment in place. Yet, you feel naked with the way Seokmin shamelessly ogles your covered chest and lets out a satisfied groan, pleased that you weren't wearing a sports bra. After all, it's not the first time he's done that for you — but it is under this strange context.

"Seokmin — "

"I'll do whatever you want me to do. Tell me." His voice is low, rougher than you've ever heard, causing tingles to shoot down your spine at the way he says your name. "I should take full responsibility for whatever happens."

His last sentence echoes over and over inside your head because yeah, what the hell is going to happen? — until you blurt out, "You find me attractive?"

Finally, Seokmin acts the way you expect and are familiar with, his shy demeanor coming out like sun rays peeking through overcast clouds. Bowing his head, forehead flopping on your shoulder, he admits defeat. 

"As if that's even a question, goofball."

"No way — there's no way! My bestie, you, find me, your bestie, like. Hot?"

"Look, I know it's cliché to fall for your friend and all that stupid shit," he grumbles, "but you don't have to sound so shocked. I already know thanks to Mingyu."

You freeze. "Know what?"

"… You're really going to make me say it?" he laughs in disbelief and shakes his head against your shoulder, causing your loose strap to slide down. "When my pride's already in tatters?"

Urging Seokmin to pick up his head and look at you, you face his brown eyes straight-on and cup his flushed cheek. "What did Mingyu say that crushed your pride?"

He sighs. "He told you I liked you before I ever got the chance to say it myself to you."

Your eyebrows raise. "He did?"

"Yeah. And I thought you just. Well. I don't know, I thought you were just ignoring it out of consideration or something. Obviously. Since you didn't say anything."

"… All 'cause I was pretty sure he blabbered about accidentally spilling the beans to you about me liking you."

The both of you pause, silently cursing poor Mingyu. He did mean well. Somehow.

"You're joking right," Seokmin whispers, "is this real?"

"What makes you think it's not."

"Because you've only ever returned my feelings in my dreams."

Your pride swells at that, wrapping your arms around his neck daringly. "Dream about me often?"

He falls backward on the bed, taking you down with him with your bodies pressed tightly together. You admire his handsome features with renewed thirst while he shuts his eyes, no longer forcing yourself to view him through the platonic lenses you'd kept on for so long.

Then his eyes flash back open and you flinch at the burning desire blazing within them. He's never looked at you like that, at least not directly and it ignites the equal yearning you feel for him like a match.

"Yeah," he answers your teasing question, "I do."

Just the thought alone makes you dizzy. Your best friend, your sweet and lovely Seokmin who puts up with all your bullshit, laying here on this exact bed with thoughts of you consuming his mind. Pining for you. Wanting you. Shit, you think he deserves to have all his fantasies come true. And you're more than happy to help him out. 

"What do we do in your dreams?"

"Everything. Anything."

An iron-clad grip will probably leave bruises behind but it's not enough to stop you from a slow, lazy grind of your hips. You sit up for more leverage, hands on his broad shoulders for support, watching with smugness oozing out of your smile as he struggles to continue his wholesome thoughts.

"Holding hands, cute dates, buying you pretty things… "

"C'mon babe," you tease, "what else?"

"Ah… " Seokmin sighs, throwing an arm over his face to hide his eyes though it can't hide the flush creeping up his neck, to his cheeks, and coloring his cute ears. "You know… "

"Nah, I don't. Not unless you tell me." 

"… Just gets lonely in bed. At night. Cold."

"We've slept together before when I've stayed the night and vice versa."

"Mhm, but never with my dick inside of you."

You coo, trying to keep up your unbothered façade as though the quickening pace of your hips isn't making an insane mess of his lap. 

"Poor little Seokminnie had to jerk off all by himself." Leaning down to whisper maliciously in the ear that isn't shielded by his elbow, "Or did you do it while I was laying next to you because you were so frustrated?"

"As if," he scoffs, "and I'm not sure what you mean by little."

Like a switch has flipped, two hands return and grip your hips, keeping them stationary. To prove his point hard, it's Seokmin's turn to grind his pelvis up into the moist heat of your covered cunt while holding you still to feel every agonizingly delicious drag of his cock. The way he can feel you pulse against him even through your thin shorts, the devastating whimper that leaves your mouth when the rough fabric manages to catch your clit just right make up for the mildly gross stickiness of precum inside of his jeans.

A sadistic grin leers at you, almost a snarl. Such a jarring contrast to the normally soft, fond looks you're used to and a shudder runs through your body at the shock, another rush of heated arousal dripping from your pussy.

It's cute, Seokmin thinks to himself, how you put up this act and think you're the one in control when it's really me, the one whose lap you're on.

"Can you even blame me?" he growls, not waiting nor expecting any answer as he sits back up, jostling your body in the process. "I was so good, so well-behaved in front of you. And yet you waltz around me with barely anything on all the damn time, flirting with all my friends in that skimpy bathing suit without a care in the world… "

You don't even know when you ended up on your back. Staring wide-eyed into Seokmin's narrowed ones, his eyelids fluttering as he recalls these memories, fist clenched and arms tense as he towers on top of you once again. He's panting, lower body still pressed against yours.

"Batting your eyelashes at me, giggling, grinding that sweet ass all over me on the dancefloor and then skipping away even though I wanted to touch you so badly… and if that's not torturing enough, constantly showing up in my dreams, always out of reach… So yeah, I'm just a little frustrated, sorry."

"I'm… I'm… I-I didn't know — "

"I know that. I know that and that's why I felt like utter trash. You didn't mean any of it and here I am throwing my disgusting fantasies on you."

"Don't say that," you plead and cup the side of his face, running your thumb repeatedly across his mole. "You're not trash, Seokmin. I wasn't thinking — I mean I didn't realize… I just — "

"Please," he interrupts suddenly, desperately begging. "Please tell me… if this… if this is going to be a spur of the moment, out of pity, and a one-time thing… please tell me you don't want this. That you don't want me — "

"I want to kiss you." 

You watch his body tremble before he takes a deep breath, smiling up at him as his eyes gradually open. They blink owlishly at you, nearly crossing in his attempt to scan your face if he really heard you correctly as you guide him by the jawline close to your lips.

"I want you, Seokmin."

To be honest, you've never really imagined what it'd feel like to kiss your best friend. The movies you've watched make it out to be magical, enchanting, and something out of a fairy tale. Sure, maybe they're not wrong but the majority of entertainment is the bad boy turning sweet or a soft boy remaining a gentleman.

Nothing's prepared you for awakening the beast in a good boy.

He kisses you with a ferocity that steals your breath from the get-go. A sensual clash of teeth, tongue, spit, love bites, and nips. Seokmin always had an enjoyable, pleasing tone to his voice and it sounds even better when he's grunting and groaning in the laidback battle for dominance.

Somehow, your clothes are merely disheveled and not ripped off despite continual tangling and grabbing at each other. Once again, you find yourself back on top as you gasp for air — having to push him away when he chases after you for more kisses. If you thought he was pretty before, he's even lovelier with shiny, swollen lips and a dazed, hungry look in his eyes.

Despite pouting at the sudden distance, the man astonishingly looks at you like you've hung the stars in the sky. As if he's never seen the ugly sides of you, your lowest and most embarrassing moments. His gaze trails from where you sit on his thighs to the rise and fall of your heaving chest to your blown-out pupils with such appreciation and awe that your cheeks are set aflame.

Although maybe you're just seeing a reflection of your own adoration. Running your hand down the toned length of one of his arms, you intertwine your fingers together. A smirk returns to your face as he squeezes back, distracted.

"So, can I see your abs now?"

Seokmin groans your name and chews on his lip, uncertain. You shrug and toy with the hem of your own shirt before decisively pulling it over your head. A blissed-out sigh escapes his mouth at the reveal.

Your bra is undone — thanks to his earlier mischief — and barely covers your breasts. Threatening to fall off at the slightest move, you pretend to protect what little modesty you might have and keep it in place with a free hand. 

"Tit for tat?" you tease.

He audibly gulps and you watch his Adam's apple bob. You wait patiently, letting him go at his own pace and back out if he wants. Though he does relent because he feels at comfort with you, revealing his gorgeous tan skin and upper body you hadn't seen in what feels like years.

"Omigod…" you gasp out and he cringes, upper body taut with nerves. "You've been hiding a six-pack away from the public for so long?"

"I — "

"I want to touch them."

"Why are you so obsessed with my abs?"

"'cause they're mythical. Like unicorns or… or Bigfoot."

"You're comparing me to a yeti?"

"Not yet…i!"

He rolls his eyes at the ridiculous pun. "I thought I was getting a 'tit for tat'?"

"Yeah," you nonchalantly slide off your loose bra and toss it somewhere on his bedroom floor. Seokmin doesn't even get to relish the bare sight of your tits for his own enjoyment because you're grumbling, "can't even show his best friend his fine ass abs," and he has to correct you.

"Maybe if I was your boyfriend, I'd show them to you all the time."

"Oh? Is that a promise? A threat? A distraction?"

"An offer. A suggestion even."

"It's pretty tempting," you play coy, "can I touch you if I say yes?"

"Only if I can touch you too."

"Then yes." Your pointer finger travels down the flexed crease of his skin to right above his belly button. "Can I see your dick now?"

"But I want… I'd like to… taste you."

"Later," you assure and daringly place a kiss above his waistband. Your hands tug at the belt when his hips stutter upwards. "Please?"

He's gone the moment you flutter your eyelashes at him and so are his ruined jeans. Discarded on the floor to join the growing number of other clothing when he says yes. 

Even Seokmin himself would admit he is indeed too soft for you but his cock certainly isn't. Your eyes nearly bug out when it flops against his stomach, angry red and leaking tears of precum. He grits his teeth at how much it aches, perfect jawline even more prominent. 

His self-esteem would have been dashed to pieces at the devastating frown on your pretty face but it's greatly inflated when all you can do is whimper out, "You're so big… "

"Yeah?"

Your best friend — no, now your boyfriend, you suppose — hisses when you blink at him. 

"There's no way you're gonna fit."

"Hah, 's never been a problem before." Nails dig into his thigh, the little show of possession at the mention of his previous partners wickedly giving Seokmin another ego boost. He's quick to try and appease you though by saying, "don't worry, babe… let me prep and taste you, I'll make it fit I promise and you'll feel good."

"Fuckin' sweet talker." You feel a hand reach out to temptingly slip under the band of your shorts. "Everything about you is always so sweet."

"'m sure you taste even sweeter." 

"Seokmin…" 

"Hm?" His touch grows bolder at the moan of his name, squeezing at the plumpness of your ass. "Will you please let me have a taste? Just wanna help you out." 

You won't be thinking I'm so sweet after this. 

Eager to touch him, you nod and start to take off your shorts but Seokmin is faster. Nearly tearing them off your body in excitement and somehow managing to position your bare lower body right where he wants it. 

Luckily, you're able to face his neglected cock. A shriek leaves your mouth, though, because the hardened tip of his tongue is searching for your clit, lathing and suckling on it when he does find it. 

You try to focus on your prize but it's difficult with the vigor he's attacking your throbbing, needy pussy. Seokmin holds you up high enough that he can leave occasional nips on the inner crease of your hips before harshly licking and sucking up your messy arousal. Shaking his head back and forth with an animalistic growl, all you can do is resort to pitiful kitten licks and slobbering mindlessly on just the side of his cock. 

The more you attempt to wrap your lips fully around the tip, the further down he brings you to his mouth until you're almost suffocating him. A brutal assault where you can only twitch your hips to which he agreeably grunts, gliding you across his open mouth ever so slightly. Unable to escape the throes of pleasure, not that you would want to — you give up and give in. 

Tears fill your eyes as your body convulses and shakes, staring longingly at his cock through bleary eyes. Seokmin's muffled moans as he gladly helps you ride out your orgasm with your fluttering hole clamping around his tongue barely registering in your ears. You feel like you're floating while underwater in the most delicious of ways. 

Seokmin manages to nudge you enough so he can catch his breath while waiting for you to come back to him. A fond smile on his lips when you're finally able to move and he helps you flop by his side. 

"Why on earth are you a pussy-eating pro?" 

"You keep complaining about things most people don't find fault in." 

"I wanted to suck the life out of you, not the opposite." You reach for his cock again but he stops you — again — and rubs the back of your hand consolingly while he wipes the wet mess you'd left on his face with a smirk like a badge of honor he takes pride in. "Lee Seokmin!" 

"Shhh, don't whine, baby. Almost there, I'll let you have my dick soon. Give it to you real good. Now that I've confirmed what a tight, good little pussy you have for myself, gotta make sure you're stretched out enough. Don't wanna hurt you." 

"It already hurts, 'm so empty, 'min." 

"Greedy," he snickers, knowing you're full of shit, and sits up. "After I just stuffed you with my tongue so well that you complained about it, now you want me again?" 

"Always want you. Always have. Didn't realize it before but it's true. 'm sorry, Seokkie, need you so bad though." 

"Lucky I like you so much. Now turn around, let me see that lovely ass of yours." 

You do as he says, clambering up on all fours and arching your back prettily, looking over your shoulder to see what he'll do next. 

The sight alone is a wet dream. He's licking his lips, brown eyes honed in on your puffy, seeping cunt until he's snapped out of the trance when he realizes you're watching him. He sticks out his tongue to pull a silly face and you shake your head in disbelief. 

A finger traces up your spine before it turns into his palm pushing down between your shoulder blades so your cheek is pressed into the pillows. You can just feel the heavy heat of his cock but he pulls away before you can savor it for too long. A constant tease that leaves you whining again in frustration and wiggling your hips enticingly, a futile effort. 

"I know you're desperate. 'm sorry, don't wanna cum too fast and disappoint you though." 

"You won't disappoint me." 

"Nope, I'll make it worthwhile. Promise. We can do whatever positions you want after this. I'd like to see you riding me like you do in my dreams, personally." Watching how you clench at his words, he chuckles. "Knew you'd like that too. Now, let's see…" 

He slips a digit inside your hole muttering, "There we go," and adds another. And another. Three fingers explore your gummy inner walls and he hums in contemplating tones before he begins scissoring motions to get your pussy to further open up. 

Your moans are muffled by the bed and Seokmin simply increases his pace to make them louder with a sneer of satisfaction you don't see. You do feel him kissing down the length of your spine, more love bites that make you squeal at each pinch. 

"So cute and perfect. What 'm I gonna do with you?" he asks and pretends to understand the unintelligible garble to his rhetorical question. "Yeah, that's right, babe. Fuck you even more stupid than you are now 'cause it's what you deserve." 

Retracting his fingers, licking them clean, and mumbling how pretty you are — then he's finally wrapping a veined hand around his even veinier cock to tease at your entrance. 

He plays with your wetness, coating his tip with it and making both your mouth and pussy drool. And god, does Seokmin relish the vision before him. 

You're everything to him and that thought alone makes him bite down on his lower lip, a bead of sweat trickling down his forehead. He doesn't want to fuck this up. Every muscle in his body tenses when he takes a deep breath and eases himself inside, enraptured with the way your soft pussy lips part and cling around his length to welcome him. 

When he glances up to check how you're doing, he has to reign himself back from exploding or thrusting insensitively all the way in. The way your eyes roll up, a stain of drool left on his blanket, and the feeble thank you's followed by a filthy series of moans — he lets out a string of curses that would make even a depraved whore blush out of shyness. 

"S'big, s'full," you hiccup, clenching and unclenching in rapid successions that has Seokmin wheezing, though he tries to comfort you. 

"'m not even all the way inside, sweetheart. Bear with me, babe. Breathe. I've got you." 

"Got me… hella fuckin' full."

"You can take it. I know you can." He pushes his hips forward a bit more. "There you go, sweetheart. Relax just a tiny bit… Yeah, that's it…" 

Praises fall from his lips and you sob at both the goddamn stretch and unfathomable pleasure. You already feel him buried in your gut reaching spots you didn't even know existed by the time he's almost bottomed out for his pelvis to press temptingly against your ass — you're pretty sure you can feel him in your lungs at this point.

"S'deep…!" 

"Feel so fucking good… d'ya need me to pull out a little, baby? You still with me?" 

You answer him by bravely using whatever strength — or more like the urge for him to split you open and take it all because you want to be as good as he's telling you that you are for him — and push yourself back so he's fully seated within your tight cunt. 

You're probably screaming if your raspy throat and ringing ears are anything to go by. He's panting and rubbing his forehead with a groan. 

"Fuck, what are you so hot for?" 

The air feels like it's been punched out of his lungs, the same way his cock is being suctioned and squeezed. In an effort to wrangle whatever control is left within himself, Seokmin focuses on your body and how it reacts. Laying over your arched back to press your bare bodies close together in an intimate fashion. 

You can feel his necklace and its cool touch on your burning skin. The recollection of never seeing him without it since gifting it to him reignites a possessive streak in you and has your pussy pulsing around him more fervently. Suddenly you long to have his mark engraved on you permanently, etched into your body and soul just like the inanimate object. 

It's almost a shame when he pauses to tug it free so it doesn't break and let it hang over your shoulder instead. Not that it matters much, for you'd only have a temporary imprint of a dog tag shape on your back. 

As if he can read your muddled mind (he probably can), Seokmin makes up for it in his concentration to delay his dizzy cloud of absolute unbridled lust. He's already left many physical reminders of his touch where you'll definitely be sore later scattered around your body and as a bonus — bites down where your neck meets your shoulder. 

(You have no idea how you'll explain the obvious teeth marks to your friends the next day but you know they'll know. Especially when Seokmin — the little shit that he is �� shamelessly shows off the various marks you'll leave all over him later tonight.)

But you don't think about that right now, any and all thoughts consumed of him, him, and him. You're full. So full. Oh, how you ache to run your fingers across his gorgeous body the same way he's able to yours, sneaking a hand underneath to fondle at your breasts and tug at your nipples. You suppose that can wait, already inching toward another crashing orgasm when he's unable to stay still anymore and starts shallow, cautious thrusts.

"Mm, ah, 'min… Seok… min… "

"'m here baby, you're gonna cum for me already, aren't ya?" He pulls his dick out far enough to see the way your essence glistens and coats his length and then smoothly stuffs you full again. "Go on and cream on my cock, make me yours."

Shockingly you shake your head. "No, too soon!"

"S'kay, I know you can give me another one after. If you let go now, it'll feel even better after. You're still so tight, I can barely move."

You really can't believe you're about to climax so soon again. There's not really a choice to hold it off anyways, especially when his hand moves away from your tits and mercilessly rubs your clit. He could've just fucked your throat raw with how hoarse your voice is now with all the sounds he's drawn out of you.

As you recover from the fuzziness of a second orgasm, he'd taken out his cock that's basically gone numb at this point (he's not sure if that's a good thing or not), and appreciates the delectable view of how your hole has been stretched out perfectly in the shape of his cock to accommodate him so sweetly. It all screams I am Seokmin's and he fucking adores it. And you.

There's only one thing left to do. Paint you with the color white.

"You ready for me?" 

You breathlessly huff out a yes but honestly, you're unsure if you will be able to handle another peak without passing out. Seokmin soothes you, whispering that this will be the last one for this round accompanied by two chaste kisses on each of your shoulder blades. So wonderful and perfect, he reminds and suddenly you can do anything he asked of you.

Which is good because he's finally snapping his hips hard and fast with better ability, drilling into your warm, wet pussy he calls his that confirms that ownership itself with filthy noises of agreement and gushes of more arousal. You moan out a mix of yes, yours, and his name — growing so fucked out that when he asks you where you want him to cum, all you do is feebly bounce your asscheeks against his abs when he refuses to move.

"Shit, you gotta tell me now or I'll… fuck, I'll do it inside. I-I know you're on the pill but… "

"Please…"

"You'd look pretty with it all over your back but also spilling out of your pussy… "

"If you don't cum right now anywhere… I'll cry."

"You're already crying." His thumb brushes at the trail of tears that spilled over your eyelids.

"Seokmin…!"

"'m sorry, let me give you what you want."

His hips resume slamming at a rapid pace, hitting deep within that magic bundle of nerves without fail. Stars swim in your vision and the mind-numbing pressure twisting in your lower gut builds up without warning.

It's a silent scream this time and a peak that doesn't seem to end. As your body violently shudders and shakes for what feels like hours at its intensity, Seokmin's release is triggered. Gently thrusting as you spasm around him, milking his cock as it starts to fill you up with a comforting warmth. In a daze, he's forced out by the end of your explosive orgasm and watches with a slack jaw in awe.

He's managed to leave beautiful lines of white across your ass and back as intended. Though the bit he'd left inside of you is mostly expelled by you squirting and coating his thighs with your release, if he looks close enough, there are still globs of cream left around the outer lips of your cunt that has him groaning.

"This is better than what I've dreamt about."

"Of course. Real thing is always better."

"In this case, yes." 

"… Do you still think I'm sweet?"

"… Somehow, yes."

Seokmin laughs as you collapse flat against the bed. You need to clean up but both of you can afford to rest a little first. He lays down next to you on his side, bringing you into his arms and you immediately snuggle your face into his chest before fixing him with a serious gaze.

"I don't get it."

He stiffens in fear. "Wh-what?"

"You fucked your previous partners, right?"

"Um… most… of them… "

"Like this?"

"Uh… " he narrows his eyes. "What… what do you mean?"

"There's no way they would've wanted to let you go if you got a stroke game and stamina this good. Unless you were just too much of a beast in the sheets — which I could understand."

His arms tighten around you. "I'm sorry, did I go too hard on you? I just didn't wanna cum too fast."

"No, you're insane but it was… incredible. You're the unreal one here."

"Didn't expect that when you harassed me about my abs, huh?"

"I did not harass you and of course not, did you?"

"No, but… I'm glad it did. You… don't…  you don't regret it, do you?"

"No, why would I?" He breathes out a tiny sigh of relief which has you raising an eyebrow but you continue on. "I don't get why they didn't try harder to stick around. I mean you're perfect. In all aspects. I one-hundred-percent mean that."

"They weren't you, though. I'm sincere when I say you've always been the one. I was just afraid…" 

"You're a damn good actor, you know that. I had no idea."

Your favorite smile beams at you. "I did major in theater. And we're both kinda idiots."

You slap at his chest playfully and he covers your hand with his. "I like you too, you know that? Like really mean it when I say I do. Even if you just obliterated my fucking vagina out of existence."

"There's no way, I most certainly did not." He kisses your forehead. "'cause you still have to ride me like promised."

"I don't think I'll be able to."

Your eyes close, ignoring Seokmin's gasp of shock and protests about cleaning up. He can tell you're pretty exhausted and acquiesces, shifting you into a position more comfortable for you to be able to doze off for a bit.

But you take that opportunity to spring to life, sucking the nastiest hickey on his neck right above his silver chain. One that will take weeks to heal. He lets out a moan as you do it and when you back away, the atmosphere has heated up again.

"You're giving me a hard time," he points out with an eyebrow wiggle and you giggle. 

Urging him to roll over, you lug your aching limbs up and over so you can straddle his upper body. Adding more and more love marks and bites on his chest, neck, and arms. It's your turn to stake a hushed claim of mine whispered into his ears that you nip at. And he giggles, loving the attention you're showering him with.

His cock is stirring to life under your ministrations as is another pool of arousal swirling in your gut. Despite the hiss of oversensitivity and slight pain you both feel, you ease his length back inside. Nearly crying out because this new angle means he's stuffed in you even more, you don't know if he can fit until you're gasping in relief once you're successful.

He tentatively brushes his fingers against the bulge that appears in your lower tummy, wanton moans erupting from both of you at the gesture. It sends chills down your spine and you shiver.

"Gonna have to help me move, dunno if I have enough strength to make your dreams come true."

"S'kay, we have forever to act them out again and again," he reassures you which erases your pout. "You'll get used to me with enough practice."

"You think so?"

"Well, we can only test that theory to make sure."

You giggle as he pulls you in for a tender kiss by the back of your neck. "You're naughtier than I could've ever imagined."

"But you love it. You love me." His smug look only grows at your agreeing hum and when he flexes his abs. "Now, shall we see if all the work I put into my abs is worth it, babe?"

onlyseokmins: February 2023 ©

Taglist: @joshibambi @junhui-recs @pandorashbox @rubyscoups @woozluv @darlingvernon @charcharfairy @httpswonwoosglasses @yeosayang @buffhoshi @horanghae8star @noraehey @misssugarlips @tinkerbell460 @aceofvernons @dejavernon

[autumnslance]

G'raha's Leadership in the Final Days

Finally got PunchyCat to the Final Days, and while we often speak to the big cutscene where G'raha "goes into Exarch mode" and takes command in the chaos, before that he and the WoL run around Radz-at-Han investigating the Blasphemy, and even there, G'raha's many years as Exarch really show through in how he interacts with the traumatized and terrified people.

Rahdvira: Sisters have mercy, what is happening to the world!? What am I to do…? Is nowhere safe!? G'raha Tia: Settle down, friend. The danger has passed…at least for now. If it's not too painful to remember, could you tell us what you saw?

and at the end of the man's tale:

G'raha Tia: That is enough, my good man. You were brave to share with us your tale. Many of your fellow merchants are safe. The High Crucible, too, has survived mostly unscathed. Pray stay close to your friends and loved ones, and rest your body and mind while you are able. G'raha Tia: I suspect that is the most we can expect the people here to tell us. I think it best we find a place outside the bazaar where we might rest and review our findings.

Choosing to Speak with G'raha...

G'raha Tia: It might distress those still traumatized by the incident to discuss what we've learned within earshot…

He also remembers the details of how WoL knew Khalzahl (thanks to that great memory of his, hearing the reports of the first trip to Thavnair). As Mihleel is shaken by remembering the terror erupting at her tables, however...

G'raha Tia: Forgive me. I would not have you recall the memory if it brings you pain. If I could, I would ask just one more thing.

After getting directions to Khalzahl's neighborhood, WoL and G'raha question an older woman:

Mahti: I don't travel much these days, but my daughter's told me not to venture outside. Stuck in here as I am, I've heard little about these bizarre goings-on. G'raha Tia: Rest assured, the city is safe for now, but the situation may change without warning. G'raha Tia: I urge you: stay close to your daughter, and be prepared to take refuge should the satrap order it. Mahti: Yes, I shall do just that. Thank you for your concern, and pray stay safe as well.

And then the sleepy Arkasodara down the street:

Parigha: Hmmm…? Could you come back another time? I just woke up, and I'm not exactly in the mood for idle chitchat. G'raha Tia: Well, that's one way to avoid the panic, I suppose… G'raha Tia: Pardon our intrusion. You may not have noticed, but a great danger has come to Thavnair. I encourage you to stay alert, and prepare to flee the city should the situation turn dire. G'raha Tia: But before we leave you in peace…pray allow us to ask a question or two.

And finally, when dealing with Djinabaha at Ruveydah Fibers, helping the employees pack things away before he'd even talk, G'raha finishes with this as we go on to the next quest (and Ahewann's fate).

G'raha Tia: My friend, we must take our leave. I pray that your establishment is spared further tragedy. But remember: your lives are far more precious than any wares. If you are ordered to flee, do so without hesitation. Djinabaha: Indeed… I thank you for your concern, and pray you two take care as well.

G'raha knows how to talk to people shaken by disaster, calming and reassuring, and giving them clear advice and action to take to keep themselves safe. It's a handy precursor to his taking command in the next cutscene, reminding us that he is, unfortunately, all too familiar with events similar to these, and this steadiness, thoughtfulness, and concern comes from too many years of practice.

[ominis-g]

Henry Winter x Reader pt 2

This is a continuation of part one which you can read here. Prompt from an ask from @beauty-is-terrror,

This is written in first person POV. The narrator is female. Her name is not used.

Summary so far: After a mix-up at the administrative offices with Bunny, you let him stay in your dorm room in lieu of Henry's guest room. A snow storm approaches, and you and Henry begin talking of an entirely hypothetical situation where you would be his roommate. But talking in hypotheticals is often a metaphor, and after the snow storm knocks out the power and with both of you worried about the heat going as well, the truth comes out: both you and Henry don't want to leave each other, and would rather like it to be roommates and sharing a bed... not just for practicality's sake, but indeed for romance.

Summary for part two: Smut. Henry "in Paradise."

Warnings: 18+, M/F.

Wordcount: 3,271

A/N: I was hedging on using more vulgar language, but if you prefer that for next time, I certainly can.

Was this the change that I had been waiting for? Many things still remained the same, but there was certainly a shift in how I saw them. The snow persisted, at least the wind whistling outside of the walls and through the windows did, and the house remained dark, but it was not as unwelcome as it had seemed the night before. I was elated at not having to spend another night on that uncomfortable bed, and it might have coloured my perceptions, but not as much as seeing Henry lounging on his bed with a book. Casual, a glass of liquor half-drunk in his hand that he swirled idly as he read, his glasses reflecting the lantern’s light only when his head moved.

I paused there in the doorway, and despite my eagerness to join him, there was still hesitation. We had barely touched, and now we were just going to share a bed? He drank the remainder in his glass, and when he went to set it down, he noticed me. The glass made a noise as it landed on the wood, and his book dropped so he could see the full view.

“Don’t you usually wear long pajamas?”

I looked down at my nightdress, suddenly with a pang of doubt at the choice. “I was worried it might be too warm, since we are sharing. I can go change if it makes you uncomfortable.”

“There’s no need for that,” he assured me. “I didn’t even know you owned one of… those.”

“I do not wear it at the country house, but sometimes during the summer in my dorm.”

I was still standing there, and when I looked up at him from the flowing dress, he was smiling. “Do you? I prefer the nude.” I stared at him. “For the heat,” he clarified. He set down his book and invited me in with a hand. I walked to his side of the bed, and he did not oppose this. His fingers caught the fabric curiously. “Cotton?”

“Yes; nice and breathable.” He made a noise of appreciation. “I can get you one, if you want–”

He chuckled. “I don’t think I could pull it off–”

“You could!” His fingers went from the fabric to press to the warmth of my leg, and I swallowed. “Do you want to try it on?”

He shook his head, but his good humour stayed. “I shall just admire it on you.” His hand retreated, but he was smiling as he relaxed back to the bed. “And you smell good, too.”

“Well, I thought since we would be close…” I trailed off the thought. His eyebrow was raised. “Is it too strong–”

“No.” He held out his hand to me, palm up, so I placed mine there at the invitation. He pulled me onto the bed, in that little space between him and the edge of the bed. I pressed closer to him, legs very aware of the warmth of his through his pajamas, and attempted to get comfortable. He scooted over, but his arm stayed around me to keep me close. He retrieved his book, tilting it for the lantern light so he could continue reading. He adjusted so I could lay my head fully onto his chest, fingers flattening the fabric the buttons had disturbed. 

I took in a deep breath of him, and his scent had not changed, but it was still intoxicating. I trailed my fingers down the fabric, and I felt him tense under the touch. I twirled my fingers back up, hitting every button along the way, but when I did finally look up at him, he was focusing wholly on his reading. His fingers had tensed to hold the fabric of my nightdress, but when I paused, they loosened, back to running it through his forefinger and thumb idly.

“Am I distracting you?”

“It’s early still; we could read together before tucking in.” I stayed looking at him, and he finally noticed. He met my eyes. He closed the book and set it off to the side. “We can tuck in now, and to answer your question: yes, you are distracting.”

“In a bad way?”

He shook his head, his fingers tensing on my back to invite me up towards him. What was I going to do? Refuse? A hand on his chest, I rose, following those fingers that were so insistent, and I pressed my lips to his. He took in a breath through his nose, but then he was leaning up to meet the kiss fully. His other hand clutched at my hair, making sure I stayed, and the nervousness that I had been battling eased. It was a big step– for us– but it was still just a kiss until those fingers at my back dropped down to find my skin. They clutched to my thigh, and then the other, pushing so I was more over him than not.

My knee found the bed on the other side of him, and his heat fully below me, leaking through the thin cloth that annoyingly separated us. His hand left my hair, trailing down to catch at my side instead, scrunching up the cotton, mirrored on the other side; our kiss was suddenly distracted, and he broke it to remove his glasses. I ran my fingers through his hair as he was returning to the pillow, and his eyes were direct onto mine. Deep, and usually sombre, but not in this moment: they were instead bright and alert, even as they trailed down my features, down to all of me he could see perched on top of him. I sat up to give him the full view, taking the opportunity to press my hands down onto his chest, and then, when he still did not move, to begin unbuttoning his pajama shirt.

Henry let me, and he waited until I was just finishing the last button before lifting on the nightdress. I took it from his fingers to pull it off over my head, letting it fall to the floor and far out of the way. His fingers returned to my skin, trailing now up my bare sides and sending little happy sensations from those warm touches all the way through me. They continued up, but only when he reached my breasts did his palms join in; the warmth allowed a pleased noise from deep in my throat to leave my lips, and he hitched a smile. I leaned over to reinstate the kiss, and he met it with the same kind of noise to match, hands squeezing softly at first, fingers adjusting for a good feel, and then harder. My hands clutched at his arms, breath to his lips, and he murmured something very softly in Greek. Something I did not know.

“Ethereal worship: a statue that has come to life for my touch, and mine alone,” he whispered instead, perhaps realising that. My lips brushed against his, feeling the sentiment repeated in the ancient form, and he was the one that reinstated our kiss. His hands released me, allowing me to press our bare skin together, and his warm touch was possessively down my back to encourage it.

I tugged at the cloth of his shirt to reveal more of his skin, and then his lips parted from mine. He sat up under me, his breath to my neck as he took off the top, and my hands following the revealing skin from his shoulders, his back, each touch sending a fresh thrill through the entirety of me. He abandoned the cloth as soon as he was free, rather for my hips, his thumbs digging into flesh, hitting bone, adjusting me to be closer still. I let out a breath to his neck as I felt him through cloth, whole and hot; my arms tightened around him, fingers mussing his hair and clutching to not lose the feeling. He adjusted his legs, spreading my thighs further to be sure that neither of us lost the sensation, and forced my hips to move enough so that I got the breadth of the throbbing cock. I shuddered in pleasure, forgetting the snow that was keeping us inside, the chill of the rest of the house, any trepidations that had coloured the entire past two days with unease and being so unsure. They disappeared now, dismantling themselves into a breath of smoke and the moans between us. Just those sweet noises that I craved more than anything other.

Those moments there sitting on top of him, our bare torsos together, his hands manipulating my hips for our combined pleasure did more to break down the walls and barriers between us that had been holding us both back more than anything else could have. It did not last, but the other side was so much better, I could not complain, and there was no going back.

Breath laboured, Henry turned me over so my back was to his bed, and his touch and weight suddenly left me. I watched him retreat, hands sliding over skin to fall back to myself and legs relaxing. He moved his things first to the side table– the book and his glasses– before he stripped off his pajama trousers and returned as bare as I was. He caught my arms when they reached out to get a feel of him, keeping me there vulnerable on the bed and ultimately at his whim.

He hovered over me, his hair a mess and shading his eyes, and when I tilted my head up for him, he gladly met me for a deep kiss. His lips open over mine, his tongue offering the hit of whiskey and lingering tobacco that remained even when his attentions turned to my neck. Even there, his tongue did not stay; his breath was between my breasts when his hands released my arms, though I did not move them just then. His touch and lips descended lower, taking in as much of my skin as he could along the way, and when his strong hands pushed apart my thighs so he could take in a deep breath of between my legs, my hands went instinctively to his hair, hips rising at the sensation.

“There is the lavender oil,” he murmured, “but it is mingling with your scent; stronger and stronger while we were pressed together, and driving me into delirium and madness.” His arms came under me, wrapping and lifting my hips and lower back off of the blankets; most of his face was lost to my sight, but he was looking up at me. If he was waiting for some kind of objection, he must have known that none was coming.

But it was still difficult to think of something to respond with. His nose, his breath, his lips were surely enough for him to realise my response. “Elixir of life,” I finally whispered.

“If the Fountain were to be found anywhere, surely it is here; the only way to know for sure would be for me to drink long and often from it.”

I did think of correcting him, but it did not seem like the opportune moment to do so. He must have been telling the truth when he said that the very scent of my pleasure had sent him into delirium, and any number of alchemic quips could have left my tongue, but… no. Perhaps he was making his own truths, but should he want to drink often from my spring, who was I to deny him that?

Instead, my fingers brushed through his hair, and his eyes closed softly, serenely. His lips opened, but no words left them this time; no, his tongue came for its first taste, hot, wet, slow in pushing open the soft folds of my skin. It withdrew, and I heard him swallow with a loving rumble. I fell back to the bed, eyes closing as my hips rose into his weight; my breath was already catching, but with each further taste, every time that his tongue pushed its way into me, it became more and more trying to keep it steady. He lifted us connected together, and my legs wrapped over his shoulders, down his back, and whatever timidness had been left abandoned him.

His entire body shifted just so his tongue could thrust into me with a feral nature, further enhanced by the groans that streamed endlessly from him. I gasped at the first, rolling up against him, and he met the movements, aided them, his breath hard and serving to only enhance the pleasure. The fluid never had a chance to leave me, caught as it was instantly on his tongue, and just knowing that caused a further deluge, and of my moans. My hands tugged at his hair, trying to ground myself, but my eyes opened and I saw him buried deep and desperately against my pussy and it was all for nought. 

I pulsed around his tongue, and his groans cut as if he had not been expecting it, but they were soon back; his tongue was not leaving me anymore, only practically twisting inside of me. He still met my hip’s movements, fingers digging into my sides painfully until the heat wracked my entire being. I gasped, head thrown back, hands keeping his head there, his tongue in me to be sure he could catch it all, hips stuttering at the glorious climax.

I could not keep Henry there, though I did try. He withdrew to take some deep breaths, kissing at the inside of my thigh, and I could feel just how out of breath I had made him. I sat up with trembling arms to able to see him: eyes closed, cheek slick with the waters of life and sweat combined against my skin, arms strong still and not releasing me, though lowering with me to rest on the bed. 

It was another moment before his hands and arms released me, flexing his fingers; he had been holding rather tightly. He collected the remnants from around his lips, eyes steady on me as he licked it away. “You did not disappoint.”

I laughed in an airy way, sitting up further. I stretched out my legs, winding my feet in circles to regain all of their feeling. “Satisfied?” He frowned in my direction, and I smiled. “We could tuck in now–”

His hands fell to my thighs, pushing my legs open again, eyes trailing down before they jumped back up to mine. “Not quite yet. I feel awake.” The fresh hit of air, and his words, sent a shudder up through me, though quickly quelled when he slid his touch up on either side of me until our lips could be together. I took in a deep breath of him, hands all the way up his back for his hair, urging him to fall against me. I needed his weight and heat over me, enveloping me, and he did not argue. He fell, between my legs, his throbbing cock against my thigh, and then as quick as it was there, to slide up to meet the puddle he had left. The noise he made against my lips was not to soon be forgotten, and I was sure to meet it; the pressure against already sensitive skin was enthralling, and that it was him and his cock– I could not help it.

Henry wrapped his arms up and under me, and then rolled us so that his back was to the bed, granting me a few extra longing kisses. Both of my knees found the blankets, tugging my hands from under him and down his chest as I sat up. His features had the tone of elation, mouth still open from our kiss, and his eyes following my form as I adjusted to be seated fully on him. Neither of us moved for a few seconds, but then his hips shifted, his large hands were to my sides to lift me; my hands fell to his chest to steady myself, swiping through the sweat, biting my lip at the feel of his tip against me. My fingers fell between us, taking the opportunity also to look down at his cock; my hand wrapped around the shaft and he grunted, tried to press me down over him. My touch had to raise to myself, directing his cock between the folds and to my entrance and the next he urged my hips down, he entered smoothly. 

I gasped, hand falling to the bed, and his hips thrust themselves up against mine to bury his cock into me completely. My head fell to his chest, then his shoulder with moans for him at the feeling; I gripped at his arms, listening to his faltering breath that was soon under my ear. Then into my hair, the warmth of his touch up my back and comforting as his other hand gripping at my hip to move me over him. Not a lot, but it was enough, more than enough with his movements to match. 

I had to gather myself enough to move, but it proved difficult. At first, it was just meeting his direction, rolling my hips down with his hand to help; his cock was filling me, stretching me, completing me in a way that I did not realise was possible before, and each of our movements together hit the perfect spot; I did not want the pleasure to end. And yet still, the temptation for more was there. I slowly sat up, my hands drawing down Henry’s shoulders, his chest, and he let out a moan that he must have been stifling. His features were full of the emotion, though, and, fuck, so were mine. 

Both of his hands were on my sides then, eyes moving over the entirety of me, watching my breasts bounce as he encouraged a quicker pace perhaps for just that very reason. Our breath was coming with difficulty. My touch left his skin to wrap up into my own hair, head and body leaning back to get completely lost in the feeling of him, stomach tensing with every roll to meet his increasingly fast and desperate thrusts.

His grip tightened on my thighs, every breath was a gasp for air, and then he tugged me up. He let out little protesting sounds when I resisted, the tip of his cock pressing right where I needed it, but then it was not a suggestion. He forced me up and off of him, his head back with groans of pleasure as he finished over my thighs, and his stomach. I watched the splattering of our skin together with a bitten lip, slowly releasing my hair and then falling down to lay beside him.

Henry did not protest this. I do not think he had the breath or energy to. I pulled myself to him, fingers swiping up his damp skin to turn his head to the side so that I could kiss him. My lips moved on his, and after a few seconds he met it, his tongue to mine in an extension of intimacy only helped along by his hands coming to find all of me that he could.

The kiss did not stay, but his hands did. He settled himself, relaxing down beside me as the tension left him completely. “The elixir of life comes from the philosopher’s stone,” he murmured, and I laughed softly, resting my head on his shoulder. He was smiling. “But who knows? Perhaps you are the Fountain of Youth.”

[da-rulah]

You can decide wether this is a request or not but just for your enjoyment, coming up behind either Mary or copia and placing your hands on his hips…slowly sliding them down into the front of is pants and through the waist band of his boxers and just cupping him…holding his cock and keeping it warm. Intimate

Ooooh I love the thought of this. I've really neglected Copia lately, focussed too much on my Mary fic and getting so many Mary requests as a result - which of course, I absolutely do not mind! But let's give our Papa some love, shall we?

NSFW 18+ MDNI!

TW/ Groping (consensual), soft porn really, mentions of oral and penetrative sex

I mean, just picture this...

Copia's just come home from a full day of meetings. He stressed, he's overworked and he's exhausted. He needs someone to take care of him, to show him some kindness, some love - not that he'd ever explicitly ask for it.

Luckily for him, you're already waiting for him. You knew what his schedule was like today; most days, even...

When you crept up behind him in the kitchen, sliding your hands around his waist and over his chest, he had jumped in surprise having not heard you approach at all.

"You sneak up on your Papa like that, come un topolina? (like a little mouse?)" he laughs, shaking off the shock and relaxing under your palms on his chest.

"Sorry Papa... Didn't mean to frighten you..." you lied, a playful hint to your tone. You rested your cheek between his shoulder blades, hugging him closer while your hands explored the expanse of his chest, feeling the softness beneath his shirt and waistcoat.

"A likely story, amore," he laughed, his eyes closing and his body sinking back into your embrace. He could already feel the tension in his muscles fading away.

You simply hummed against him, your hands starting to undo the buttons of his waistcoat, then the buttons in the centre of his shirt until you could slip a hand inside and feel his chest hair beneath your fingers. Copia's head rolled back a little, a small rumble of bliss tumbling from his lips.

Your free hand began to slip over his stomach, down to where his pants hugged his hips and dug into his sides a little. You pulled on the laced crotch to give yourself enough room to snake your hand past his trousers. Just as you expected, he'd forgone underwear again... these trousers of his far too tight for another layer, or so he would say.

"Amore..." he groaned, only just beginning to harden under your touch as you wrapped your hand around his package, simply holding him, barely fondling at all.

"Yes, Papa?" you asked from behind him, beginning to sway a little. He naturally followed suit, the two of you gently swaying together as you groped him so gently, so tenderly, it was all he could do not to melt into a puddle on the floor.

"I'm so tired, amore. I don't know if I have the strength tonight..." he whined. He so rarely turned down an offer to have his way with you, but he'd be in no state to give you any energy tonight.

"Then how about I take care of you instead, hm? You let me do all the hard work?" You could feel his cock filling out in your hand, his body responding so well. He was so lost in his relaxation, there was no hiding your effect on him.

"I could never be so selfish, topolina..." was his only resistance. You just chuckled behind him.

"Papa, my love, you are many things. But selfish? Never. Let me take care of you, please?" you begged so sweetly, massaging your hands across his bare chest and his hardening length. He couldn't deny you; not that he wanted to. His body was already betraying him.

"If that's what you want..." he smiled blissfully, gently holding onto your wrists as you worked your magic.

It was a pitiful surrender, one that he so gladly gave. He almost regretted it when you retracted your hands and instead took his in yours, gently guiding him towards your shared bedroom so you could spend your evening worshipping your Papa as he so deserved.

He would soon retract any regret, when he spent an evening in sleepy, exhausted bliss. You so tenderly pleased him with your hands, your mouth... Even when you came to ride him, you were so careful, slowly drawing the pleasure out of your connection for the both of you.

There was nothing in this life or the next that Copia could say relaxed him more than your presence alone - especially when he allowed you to take care of him...

[signanothername]

After seeing what you thought about the "dadmare" trope, I got a little curious and wanted to know your thoughts on shipkids. Like even if you don't know them all, just Nightmare having children as a concept, I want to know your thoughtssss.

Personally I had this whole spiel about Nm kind of being a manipulative parent that uses different types of manipulative tactics to get his kids to compete with one another. Just like- a way of getting them to spread negative for his own benefit. It's a lot to describe atm but that's the short of it hehe-

Tbh ship kids aren’t my thing, like I don’t hate them, just neutral on them, I don’t find them interesting shshhshs

And as for Nightmare, god forbid he actually becomes a parent dbdhhdhd, this bitch is way too emotionally immature for that to do well with kids

Like tbh my thoughts on this topic are complicated???

But in general, I don’t see Nightmare as a parent, like at all, he doesn’t strike me as someone who wants to have kids or start a family of his own, he’s literally a semi-god, self proclaimed king of negativity in the entire multiverse, extremely powerful and literally immortal, what would having kids add to him?

Like I think it’s an important question to ask: why would Nightmare want, let alone have, kids of his own?

Spreading negativity? He has 3 slaves for that, he can even do it himself thank you

A Familly? He already has a headache inducing twin, that’s one too many

A heir? Heir for what? He’s immortal, and his possessions and power belong to him, and he doesn’t intend on sharing or entrusting it to anyone else (not that anyone deserves to in his eyes in the first place, not even his own family and blood)

Nightmare sees no benefit in having kids, cons more than pros, they add nothing to him, but take so much away, effort and time and resources that he doesn’t intend on wasting in the first place

Like, even if it added anything to him, Nightmare’s just not the kinda person who even wants kids, he isn’t in the mood to pay attention to a weak pathetic child that couldn’t survive on its own

That being said, if he did become a parent, then he’s definitely not gonna be a good one, he’d be neglecting at best, and extremely abusive mentally, emotionally and even physically, at worst

Like believe me when i say that an animal has wayyyyyy better chances around Nightmare than a kid does (and that says a lot when it comes to Nightmare)

Nightmare never had an actual active parent in his own life, and the closest he had to a parent figure, was literally a tree, Nightmare’s too ignorant on the subject of parenting and was super neglected as a child himself to truly understand how to take care of his own

Like why would he become a parent when he doesn’t even fathom the prospect of being one?

Like the closest thing I can imagine Nightmare doing when it comes to parents/parenting, is read books regarding that, not to take care of his would never exist children but cause he’s curious, only to realize “huh, parents are supposed to hold you close and kiss you and encourage/ support and love you??? Sure mother would’ve done that had she been able to, surely she loved us as much as this book speaks of”

Hell, i’d say if Nightmare had a child, it’ll be completely accidental than an actual want/ decision on his part, and a horrifying one to him at that, like I can see Nightmare genuinely freaking out at the prospect of a child of his own, but not in the sense of “oh I don’t know how to be a parent, how shall I take care of you little one?” And more “I never wanted you in the first place why do you exist? You sure as hell would never belong to me” He’d literally abandon them, if he didn’t just immediately kill them

Not to mention, I don’t think Nightmare has the patience to deal with children generally, he barely tolerates the 3 adults living under his own roof

Yeah, Nightmare and children don’t mix well, keep them separated chchhc

He will hold no love or any attachment to his supposed kids, they will not even be in his radar

Does that mean I believe that Nightmare is incapable of love? No, I believe Nightmare is cable of genuine love in general and is absolutely capable of loving people, he loves his twin after all (even when he’s in denial of it)

It’s just that he’s way to blind to that love that settles within him, he’s too stubborn and too afraid, too in denial, and he stomps on any semblance of love, kindness and compassion he has cause he believes it’s irrational, that it’ll get him killed

Plus no one showed him any love, why should he? Not that Nightmare himself believes he’s capable of love, with the hatred consuming his soul, and with how he never truly developed any true love for anyone other than his twin, Nightmare fully believes he’s completely incapable of love

And so he still hurts the people he loves, he still hurts Dream, and he doesn’t hold much guilt for it, he enjoys it even, a sort of sick satisfaction at seeing those who are weaker than him groveling at his feet, a deep rooted hatred that overshadows that love inside him, he’s sadistic and crule and full of hate as much as he’s full of love

His love for someone doesn’t mean they’re safe from him, Nightmare’s better to deal with in a business manner than an emotional one (even when he’s a being that acts on emotion than brain)

Anyone has better chances of being safe from Nightmare if they make a deal with him and somehow convince him to agree on the terms in which they are safe from him in exchange for something he wants, than if they simply rely on his love for them

Cause Nightmare’s hatred always wins against his love, but Nightmare’s fair when it comes to holding his end of the bargain, he doesn’t appreciate deal breakers and it’s beneath him to do so, as long as the other party holds their end, he’ll hold his

In conclusion, keep kids away from this bitch xbbxbxbx

[han1nn]

Old Memories

Frank Castle x male!reader

Warnings: scars all over body, self-hatred, swearing, self-harm, disabled!reader (missing arm), kissing, really bad injuries, (gore?)

Summary: Frank lives in your apartment, because he can’t buy one, he’s still a wanted criminal. Frank and you are best friends since the army. But things changed after Frank became the Punisher, he always try to get distance between the two of you. He doesn’t want to lose someone else that mean something to him. (He don’t want you to get into his „the punisher“ situations)

Then someday, Frank saw the scars all over your body and remembered the old times again, how much you mean to him, how many moments you guys shared, how you would‘ve give your life for Franks […].

Frank want to have a better look at your scars and the situation get out of control…

Type: angst, fluff

[use of y/n]

A/N: this story is so long in my mind I had to write it! Hopefully you guys will like my idea too. And English isn’t my first language so maybe I will have some mistakes in this fanfic. Also this is written in 2024 not in 2017 :)

| -> Before I start I wanted to say that my request are always open, don’t be shy and send me what comes in your mind! I will read and respond every message I see! 💌

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21.05.2017, 18:46

y/n stand in the kitchen and cooked, he cooked dinner for him and Frank. Of course he made some finished products in the microwave, it’s very hard to cook with only one arm. As the dinner was finished he just made two plates and sat down, ready to eat. But y/n wanted to wait for his „best friend“ Frank. He sits on the couch and watches the news on the TV, for more information about criminals he could kill.

Frank didn’t really spoke with y/n, only if it’s important, he tried to take his distance from him. y/n blames himself, he hates himself and he thought this is all his fault. He thought Frank would hate him and thats because he take his distance and doesn’t talk to y/n anymore.

He still sit there and just stare on his dinner, waiting for his best friend, the only sounds y/n can hear is the quiet sound of the TV. He wanted to call Frank, he really wanted but he didn’t dare. y/n took his fork in his hand and took a bite of the dinner. He didn’t eat much, stood up and walking right into the living room where Frank sits on the couch. 

y/n didn’t dare to look at him and only said:

"I made dinner.."

his voice was quiet and low, he don’t want to come in a actual conversation with Frank because he’s scared, scared to make the situation between them even worse than it is.

Frank looked a few seconds on the TV, looked up and gave y/n a cold look. He stands up and just walked past over him. As this happened y/n heart skipped a beat. He can barely feel him even when he didn’t touched him.

y/n walked into his bedroom and slamming the door. The feelings of hate that had been in him now all came up again. He thought everything is his fault, he always asked himself what he should do to make the situation better between them. He asked himself what he done and why Frank kept ignoring him, why he isn’t the same person like in the army. He’s tired, tired of Frank and his feelings for him.

He missed the old Frank, the Frank who cared for him, who laughed with him, who was actually still his best friend..

Flashback: 04.10.2013, Afghanistan

"Let go of him! I will kill you, I will kill all of you, you little bastards!"

Frank screamed and yelled at the terrorist who tortured y/n and forced his best friend to watch. Frank was frustrated he didn’t know what to do, his best friends screams shall into his ears over and over again. Frank can’t do anything, he’s tied up into a chair and can’t move at all. He wished he could do something. The terrorist laughed at both of them and they found the whole situation is very amused

Before y/n got tortured, they had to decide who had to get tortured and who had to watch, it was like a sick game that those terrorists wanted to "play". Frank’s best friend immediately said that he wanted to be chosen, he literally begged to be tortured only to keep Frank save.

"Please! Please, pick me! Do whatever you want with me but don’t hurt him! Don’t hurt my comrade!"

Frank was in shock and wasn’t agree with it, but for the terrorist, the decision clear: y/n should get tortured and Frank had to watch.

It was disturbing and horrible to watch his friend get hurt like this. Frank was so frustrated that he almost started to cry. y/n‘s body was now full with wounds, some long, some thick, some bigger, some smaller, the only thing Frank‘s best friend knew, is that everything hurts. And if this wasn’t enough, they even cut his left arm off too. Frank can see is how y/n‘s eyes rolled back and he fainted because of the pain, seeing how his best friend fell on the ground. The terrorist laughed at him and one of them is stepping closer to Frank.

"Look at your friend, laying there almost dead! Now he isn’t so brave like he acted before, huh?"

The terrorists were mocking Frank who was still tied up on the chair. He had so much anger in him. He wished he could just do something.

Before they can start to hurt Frank, the army group was storming into the small room and shoot the terrorists. The group can see y/n laying exhausted and fainted on the floor, his body really looks like a mess.

It would definitely leave scars on his body

These injury’s on Frank’s best friend’s body are definitely very deep and dangerous. Frank didn’t know if he would survive this. It doesn’t seem like y/n would survive this. After one of his mates cut the rope that tied Frank up, he immediately crawled to y/n and held him in his arms. He can’t help but cry and screaming at the army group that they should bring y/n immediately to the army aid station.

After a while they brought the two friends into the army aid station. y/n was laying in coma for 3 days but he managed it and survived. Frank was sitting on a chair, next to y/n‘s sickbed, waiting for his best friend to finally wake up. 3 days in a row Frank was sitting there and waited for his best friend to wake up. After the days have passed by, y/n finally woke up and Frank was still sitting on that chair.

"Frank..?"

As Frank heard this, he raised his head and glanced over his best friend but then his face changed into frustration. He isn’t sure if he should be happy now that his best friend woke up, or if he should be angry because y/n had given his life for Franks. Of course Frank decided to be mad, his aggression always get the control over him. He started to yell at y/n, why he done this and why he would give his own life for Franks.

At these questions, y/n only smiled weakly as respond, he was to weak to speak now.

Present day: 19:12

y/n was lost in his thoughts, about the old times. The times where Frank seemed to care, where Frank was still really his best friend. He thought about those terrible things that the terrorists done to him and how many scars they left on his body. y/n is grabbed under his shirt and felt every scar on his body, over his stomach, his chest, his neck, his rips, everywhere.

He thought about how much Frank must hate this disgusting body of his best friend, how he must missed him as the brave and "normal" soldier. He felt like he isn’t enough to be Frank‘s best friend anymore.

His fingertips started to travel harder on his body. y/n hates this feeling, this feeling not to be enough. He felt all his scars on different spots on his body. He started to scratch all over them, he thought he deserved this, deserved to be punished because he isn’t good enough. He groaned in pain as his fingernails dogged into his scars, scratching them. he can feel how his scars started to bleed, how they turn into wounds again.

y/n groaned even more, almost too loud. He was just so frustrated and sad that he didn’t even noticed how loud he has been. y/n was just so insecure about his body and angry at himself that he isn’t enough for Frank.

The heavy footsteps of y/n‘s best friend are coming closer and closer, he want to know why such noises coming out of y/n‘s room. The door cracked open, as Frank’s cold gaze meet his best friend. His expression immediately changed into anger as he saw y/n huddled on the floor, crying and scratching his scars under his shirt.

"What the fuck are you doing?!"

The Punisher immediately stumbled over to his best friend and grabbed his arm, hard, almost to hard to bare for y/n. He stopped y/n from hurting himself. Frank noticed how the scars were freshly opened by the own fingernails of his friend. y/n still lays on the floor and crying, now Frank, the person y/n loved, his best friend, saw what he’s doing to himself. He must be even more disgusted than before.

"Why would you do that?! Look at you! You hurt yourself so badly! I can’t see you like that! It reminds me too much of-"

Frank cut his own sentence as he noticed how emotional he became. His cold and angry expression returned. His grip on y/n‘s arm only tightened as Frank leaned forward his old comrade.

"Don’t ever do that again, you understand?! Fuck, look at your wounds! They’re bleeding! You just look like the day you got tortured! The day were you almost died! I can’t- I can’t see you like this!"

Frank Castle, yes, the punisher almost cried at the sight of his best friend, laying on the floor and scratching his own scars. Frank himself lays down beside y/n and wrapped his arms around him, very tightly, like he wanted to protect him.

"Why would you do that..? I can’t understand it. Why would you scratch the scars open that saved my life?"

The smaller man in Franks arms is responding the hug, he didn’t know what else to do. y/n was in the arms of his secret lover and he enjoyed it, he loved every second of it. Finally he got some attention.

"I- I know you hate me and.. that you think my body looks disgusting.."

Franks strong arms tightened around the smaller man as he heard those horrible words. Without a word the Punisher grabbed y/n‘s wrist and pushed himself on top of his best friend.

"I could never find you disgusting and I definitely don’t hate you! You’re the most strongest and bravest man I know. you sacrificed yourself for me and think I would take my distance because of your body?"

Frank was on top of y/n and held him down, so he can’t stand up anymore. The punishers grip was just too strong.

"You mean too much to me! The only reason why I pushed you away was to keep you save! I can’t believe you thought the whole time I was disgusted by you. Get these thoughts out of your head!"

Frank knew that y/n wouldn’t believe him, so he decided to lean down to his neck and stroke his hair.

"I.. I wanted to leave your apartment tonight, wanted to leave you to keep you save. I know that you’re probably aren’t save when I live here, but I also can’t leave you now, not when I see how much you‘re suffering. You know I’m still your best friend, right?"

The punisher mumbled into the neck of his best friend. His mouth was right against his ear, his breathing was heavy against y/n‘s neck. The smaller man under Frank was wrapping his one and only arm around him, wanting to hold him tight and never let him go.

"You really mean that?"

y/n asked with tears in his eyes as he sobbed uncontrollably. The punisher cursed under his breath, he just never noticed how much his best friend struggled as he pushed him away. He wanted to leave y/n completely tonight, just ran away and never coming back to keep him save.

Frank knew he had many enemys and he was afraid that something could happen to his best friend again. He was afraid that y/n could get hurt again just like in the army. Frank already failed keeping him save back then, how could he ever keep him save in New York? But the punisher also knew he couldn’t leave y/n now, not when he was crying under him.

"Of course I mean it."

Frank wasn’t really a man of words, he’s a man of actions. Words aren’t enough for him, he wanted to show his friend how much he meant to him, how beautiful he thought y/n is. The punisher had to show it somehow to his comrade, but how?

Frank‘s hand were leaving y/n‘s wrist and his hands wander down his shirt, ready to pull it up. He wants to see his friends body, to see all of him, just everything. The taller man looked down at the smaller one, searching for permission in the other ones eyes.

"Can I..?"

The punisher asked with his deep and hoarsely voice. His best friend under him was confused but nodded. y/n didn’t know what the taller man above him wants to do but he let him, he trusted him.

Frank pushed y/n‘s shirt up until he can see his whole chest. His eyes run over the whole body under him, taking in all the details. y/n‘s scars, his left shoulder where his other arm used to be, his masculine features, Franks eyes were drinking the sight under him. The punisher slowly put his hand on the stomach of his best friend. Y/n let out a gasp as he felt the warm hand on his belly, exploring the area there.

"W-what are you doing..?"

y/n asked breathless as the hand on his stomach touched and caressed the skin and scars there. Even both of Frank’s hands were working on the stomach of his best friend now, tracing the scars there, feeling how beautiful he is to him.

"Shh.. just relax. I just want to have a better look at you. Is that okay?"

y/n was confused but he gave Frank his permission by nodding at his question. The smaller man laying on the floor can’t help but enjoy his best friends big hands all over his stomach. It felt good and right. Even when he shouldn’t feel that way he still can’t help it.

Frank looked into y/n‘s eyes, seeing how much his best friend liked being touched. He was probably touch-starved. When was the last time y/n has been intimate with someone? He just can’t remember, but is this what these men are doing even intimate? It is, for y/n it is intimate and he believes that Frank thought the same. y/n is already flushed all over, his whole body had a pink tone because he felt so hot.

The bigger man above him noticed this and chuckled lowly.

"You enjoy this? Feels good, huh? My big hands on your beautiful body."

y/n blushed so hard at his words. He couldn’t believe that his best friend was saying this. Does he mean everything he says, y/n wonders but in Franks eyes he can only see pure admiration and honesty.

"Your body is a testament of what happened to you, of how strong you are and of how you saved my life. I could never hate you. I could never hate this body."

The punisher leaned closer and he slowly headed his way down to the chest of his old comrade.

"I‘m gonna kiss you all over, I‘m gonna show you how much you mean to me and how much I love this body. Is that alright with you?"

Open Ending

(idk if I should continue but please read it, give me feedback and tell me if I should continue!💓)

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I worked so long on this fanfic and I don’t even know if it’s good. Sometimes I think I‘m so mean by creating such a bloody way of a backstory☹️

Please give me feedback and more fanfic ideas!!💓

[bronx-bomber87]

Hello my wonderful fandom family :) Thanks for being so patient with me. I know I have till January but I am moving/slash road tripping at the end of Sept to a new state. Which is a HUGE change. Going two time zones ahead and everything. So wanting to get it out there before I move and have even less time LOL Also thank you for wanting to take this journey with me. S6 was hard on all of us.

Haven't had a show rock me this hard in a very long time. So I'm forever grateful for the love and comments these in depth reviews get. Never want to take that for granted. This was a ROUGH season to say the least. But I’m excited to dissect it with decompressed eyes and somewhat healed shipper heart. Be lying if I was saying it was fully healed. But was a much needed break for me. Let us begin shall we?

6x01 Strike Back.

Premiere starts off with a literal bang. They’re all trying to figure what is actually happening. The mastermind clearly not the man they just took down in Luke Moran. Also loving how scruffy Tim is in this first shot of the premiere. The stubble all over that gorgeous jawline of his. Mmm. Delicious dusting. Love to break me off a piece. Wouldn't be a review if Feral Caitlin didn't make an appearance would it? ha God he's beautiful I can't help myself. This is his fault really.

Anyway back to matter at hand.... Lucy points out Luke may have been a patsy for the real crime. Diverting all their resources to this this one spot instead of their real target. Our girl always being the brains and Tim being impressed by it. They go hand in hand. You know that man loves her brain. Her intelligence is just one of many reason's he fell in love with her. Fun to watch her flex it I have to say.

There’s so much to love about these shots in the shop with them. The Metro call sign being one of them. It does things to me. It’s just sexy. Also the automatic way she’s paired with him in this moment. Like anyone else would be in that car with him but still. Ever the packaged deal. Just the little things I always love so very much. They don’t share shops anymore. So this is a treat. Riding together, brainstorming, and just being the bad ass team they always are in the field. Makes my shipper heart happy to see it.

After the Federal Reserve mayhem we skip 6 weeks into the future. I always wondered what happened in those six weeks with our ship. Probably nothing massive tbh. But be fun to know what shippy goodness could’ve occurred. I imagine they had some time off after that. Spent it together and decompressed from the madness. Just a nice thought to think about is all. *cough fic writers cough.*

We start off our cuteness with Lucy in Tim’s office studying. There’s so much to love about this scene it’s unreal. Let’s start with Lucy taking residency in his office like it’s hers. Knowing it’s a quiet place for her to retreat to. Also I’m sure Tim offered it up long ago for her. Which makes me giddy to no end. He’s not the least shocked that she’s using it. Only that she’s not out on patrol. Married status continues to level up in this moment.

Lucy explains she’s fallen way behind in her studies. OT is killing her atm. I can’t imagine how stressed she feels. Lucy is our resident academic. Not having the time to nerd out on her studies has to be killing her. It’s why she reaches out to her man for help. To pivot this in a different direction. Something that worked for Tim when he needed studying time. Asking if she could ride with him today? Could quiz her between calls.

Getting flashbacks to 2x02 when she helped him study between calls for his exam. I always love the callbacks they do for them. Continuity is ship crack for me. I eat it up. He accepts and Lucy is beaming. Their smiles in this scene are so adorable. Couldn’t be more in love if they tried tbh. I remember thinking how much I missed our idiots in love so much. I'll be this way for S7 too. I miss them.

Tim looks excited for this challenge. You can see it in his face above. But he is also letting her know how hard it’s going to be if she wants him to do this. That it’s probably not going to solve her problem. But he’s willing to expand her knowledge base on wildcards. This way she can take any curve balls Primm has to throw. Lucy’s smile is everything when she thanks him. Relieved her man is gonna help her her out. I mean of course he would. Nothing he wouldn't do for her and she knows it.

I remember seeing the funniest post for this moment before it aired. How it was her basically asking ‘Babe, please be mean to me.’ LOL Lord knows this woman is well aware he wasn’t gonna take it easy on her. Just like the old days. It's where she learned the most. So it makes sense she would wanna dip her toe back in that pool.

Tim is ready to roll. Starting his ‘boot’ engines back up. Don’t tell me it's not a little bit of a kink for Tim. That man is too damn excited to be able to boss her around again. That being said says she learns best when she’s pissed off. I mean he’s not wrong…No one knows how to teach her better than he does. Lucy counters by saying does she? Or is this is just giving him permission to be an ass?

Tim letting her know if that’s really how she feels she doesn’t actually want his help. Lucy backtracks and is desperate for him to guide her with this. Saying she needs it. Tim is lighting up like a Christmas tree. You know that man LOVES her needing him professionally. It’s been awhile since she has. He’s excited. Lucy has been a self sufficient cop for long time now. Hasn’t needed his guidance for quite some time. So for her to come to him with this he is a happy camper.

Tim is thrilled to put his T.O. hat back on for her. They have such married energy through out this scene. Lucy telling him she doesn’t like his excited smile. Tim deflecting saying it's just his smile haha The absolute wifey look she gives him is hilarious. They just be flirting freely in the hallways. Like they aren’t completely married at this point. Even though he’s driving her insane she follows him out with an 'in love' smile. She loves her ass of a boyfriend haha

They hit the road and Lucy is still questioning her decision. Oh my girl. Saying maybe should’ve chosen Harper or Lopez instead…Tim makes a joke how Angela just got back. Her cop brain is just booting up. Which earns a smile out of Lucy. She loves this man sitting next to her so very much. Written all over her face. Doesn’t take long before Tim triggers a Lucy rant though.

Poor man is just trying to help the woman he loves get through this. Wasn't expecting the time bomb he received. He sets her off by saying no matter who teaches her they all have the same database. That there’s only a 8 percent difference between ranks. This is what ignites the Lucy meltdown above. That Primm is going to use that eight percent to trip her up. His face above when she starts is priceless. Tim is just bracing for impact at this point LMAO Ain't no stopping what's coming his way.

The flood gates have opened and phew lord what a meltdown it is LOL Holy hell. She is the queen of them. I adore how Melissa can shoot off so much dialogue in one breath. It’s impressive af if you ask me. Also makes me cackle so much cause I’ve been her. So many times when I’m under immense stress I do the same. You prattle on until you run out of steam. I can’t believe there isn’t a gif set of this rant so I made one. It’s too good not to have in this review.

It’s the look on Tim’s face that has me ROLLING. It’s been awhile since he’s had an epic Lucy rant thrown at him and it shows. Eric the King of facial expressions is at it again. I’m laughing so damn hard. I remember having to pause cause I was laughing so much at his expression. He most definitely wasn't expecting the rant that he got. If you can look at him above and not laugh you're made of stone. Hang in there Tim lmao Your girl Is worth this intense stress/anxiety vomit she just spewed all over you. It's like he doesn't even know where to begin after she's done. So he just doesn't....

The married energy continues once Lucy has wrapped up her meltdown. Tim being the smart man he is doesn’t say a word. He’s learned a thing or two from this relationship. Lucy though takes his silence as saying everything for him. With her ‘Please don’t.’ Tim trying not to start anything telling her he’s said nothing. He truly wasn’t expecting the explosion he got. Was happy to be a passenger princess today, while he quizzed her through out the day. And instead got an epic freak out right out the gate.

Tim can’t win for losing in this scene. (or this episode really) Lucy telling him she hear him thinking it. I remember there being a Chenford Bingo of some sort before the premiere. And exasperated husband was on there. This delivered that in spades. His reaction after her saying this is gold. Haha This is the woman you’ve chosen to love Timothy. LMAO You know he loves her to death neuroses and all but good lord ha.

Their banter never fails to hit and the marriage vibes on top of this is top tier. I am here for it all damn day. One of those 'When did they get married again?' moments. His look at the end is like he’s chanting to himself . ‘You love this woman…you love this woman...’ Lucy tops it off saying she just won’t sleep till the exam. Leaving Tim to shake his head more and not say a word. Only look out the window as he rolls his eyes. Primo banter and chemistry here. *chef kiss*

They roll up to their first wildcard. I adore the Metro call sign as they do. Tim assigning the crime scene to Lucy as he does. *fans self* I can’t explain why the call sign so sexy. Just is. Also them sharing it on the scene also gets me all in my feels. Tim is telling her that he is there as a resource for her. But she is the one in charge. Asking her what’s her first move?

The Plain Clothes Day vibes are all over this scene and it's fantastic. Another callback I am so happy they touched on. Lucy confidently strides onto the scene and explains her move. Tim tells her to call it in. Love the way she looks at him the entire time she does. Tim asks her what else? This is where Lucy’s confidence starts to wain sadly.

Where that panicked rookie from all those years ago begins to resurface. The way she is talking at Tim trying to figure it out oh my lord. The PCD vibes are so strong. Only this time Tim is helping her out a lot more. Unlike back in S1 he was there to watch her flop around, second guess herself and drown. It’s much different this time around. He truly wants her to succeed and let's her know as much in his responses. Lucy doesn’t see that in this moment though unfortunately.

Tim telling her the obvious boxes are checked but what’s her wildcard? The spiraling is so real for her in this moment. It hurts to watch the anxiety build in Lucy. Tim testing her knowing she can do this but her confidence is eroding in this moment rapidly. He is trying to get her there faster by saying she doesn’t have a minute. Which she really doesn’t when we know how this scene ends…

One of my fav parts of this scene is the line above. The kindness and gentleness Tim has. Because he wasn’t in love with her during PCD like he is now. Here he is trying to be supportive and gently guide her to the answer. Even give her an out for it. S1 Tim never would’ve said there’s no shame in not knowing the answer. Not this directly anyways. Doing his damn best to support her through this. But also help her get to the answer so she learns. Lucy takes it the wrong way though.

Reason being it has nothing to do with the man next to her. That man would die first before not supporting her. Level headed Lucy would know that. Sadly she is not here with us at this crime scene. Who she really is mad at is herself at this point. Because she should know the answer and her brain is stalling out in this moment. Tim told her he wasn’t gonna take it easy on her. But breaks a little with his kind reply. Giving her an out if she wants it. Lucy can’t handle it though...Because she is being far harder on herself for this than Tim could ever be. I can relate so hard to this it's unreal.

I do love the way she says ‘Sergeant Bradford, please.’ Lucy feels like she’s suffocating in her own thoughts. The panicked rush to get this right and hitting a wall. The anger building towards Tim at the same time. The confidence she has built since S3 just melting away the more she stresses. All the while taking it out on Tim. Why you ask? Because in this moment she is projecting that anxiety and stress onto him with her reply. Defense mechanism thy name is Lucy Chen.

Doesn’t take long after that line for the sprinklers to come on….The wildcard revealing itself on its own. We watch as the evidence literally gets washed away and the bullet down the drain….Lucy rushes to chase it and watches as it goes down a storm drain. A reflection for how she feels about her hopes of passing this test…It’s a rough scene to watch unfold for her. The devastation on her face when she realizes that bullet is gone is very rough.

They return to the station and Lucy is as defeated as she can be. Hoping no one knows about it as as she rubs her tattoo. They start to play clown music as she enters. SMH. Tim trying not to laugh. Aaron doesn’t help when he also laughs at her misfortune. Not a good day for our girl….Lucy gets distracted by Wesley being there with the baby.

We get a small sweet departure from her anxiety in this moment. While she has him she wants his legal opinion on her crime scene. He too laughs. These men in her life are the worst right now. Not helping her building anxiety and loss of confidence. Wes telling her she fatally ruined that scene. That she’s gonna need a straight up confession to convict someone. And that’s only if she finds the killer…oof.

We rejoin our beautiful duo staking out the crime scene. Lucy grasping at straws to fix what she so royally screwed up. Her heightened state of spiraling continues on in this scene. Lucy admits she wants to skip the exam. Her face breaks my damn heart. Killing me here Melissa. I do love the way he says her first name in response. Still gets me he can. After years of Officer Chen and ‘boot.’ Just hits differently and makes my shipper soul happy.

Tim tells her she is ready. That man would not tell her she was ready if she wasn’t. Relationship or not that man doesn’t hold back. Wouldn't send her head long into failure. If Lucy was in a better place emotionally she would’ve heard him. Heard the confidence in his tone. Seen the empathy he was exuding for her. This man has changed so much in his time with her.

It sky rocketed when they got together. Tim couldn’t have been more supportive if he tried in this scene. Hell this entire episode. But she is so very stuck in her head. A place Tim could normally shake her loose from. A specialty of his really. He can’t gain an inch of ground in this scenario. Lucy has dug her heels in so to speak that she’s gonna fail. Nothing he says is getting through.

Our girl is experiencing massive amounts of anxiety and self doubt. The panic attack is real. The fact that the one person she would’ve sold her soul for, in order to get his support back in the day, isn’t getting through is a problem. Lucy goes on to say she knows herself. That if she takes this test right now she will fail. Her confidence will die along with it. That it’s better to wait. Tim steps from one minefield to the next with this convo.

When he once again is just trying to be supportive and says ‘Then wait.’ Not only is he being in her corner he gives her something she can do in meantime. Something he hates the idea of. Her going UC while she waits this anxiety/doubt out. If that isn’t him supporting her idk what is. He is also still learning how to be there for her emotionally and she isn't giving him the grace for that. Sadly Lucy isn't in the right mind to see that though. She is just stuck in the mode she's been trapped in all ep.

I get it I really do and empathize with her. I’m the same way when my emotions are in a heightened state. Nothing gets through. I'm frozen in place emotionalIy. I get very doom and gloom as well. Lash out at anyone who isn’t going to be positive and reassuring. Which Tim is doing his best to be. But Lucy is in such a dark state of mind she doesn’t see it. All she sees right now is he doesn’t believe in her and is kicking her while she is down. She needs reassurances right now. To her he isn't delivering that the way she is wanting at this point. Him agreeing with her that she should wait is only making matters worse.

Anxiety is a cruel cruel master. It makes you believe things that aren’t true. Amplifies them to the point that you’re so wound up you’re lashing out at everyone. Even your person. Which is exactly what’s happening with Lucy in this moment. Her accusing him of making it worse with how bad she already feels. When Tim is professing words of encouragement all she hears is him saying she can’t do it.

Tim is desperate for her to know he’s in her corner after this display. Asking her if she heard him? Lucy is distracted by someone showing up to the crime scene. Tim asks her what? Lucy replying that woman was looking at the crime scene while crying. Tim is so sassy in his reply I’m proud of him. ‘Or maybe she just had a frustrating fight with her girlfriend’ heh love this. Calling her his GF always gives me the feels.

Lucy gets a last minute win with this case. Catching this lady trying to get her bracelet back after tossing the gun. Her cop gut serving her well. Sadly Lucy doesn’t see this win as such and it bleeds into this final scene unfortunately. Once again the music is absolute perfection. I’ll post some of my fav lyrics at the end of my analysis of this fight. But first let us witness the incredible chemistry that is Eric and Melissa in this final portion. You know your ship is amazing when even their angst is lightning in a bottle goodness.

This fight I will say when I watched it originally excited me. Because it just showed they’re human. Real. The both of them. They make mistakes and aren’t perfect. How healthy this was for them to get off their chest. Because honestly the UC/detective tension has been building for a long while. This was the boiling point for it IMO. This scene hurt so good to watch. I rewound it a few times before I could process it the first time.

Tim starts off with congratulating her on her 4th quarter win. He’s genuinely so proud of her for bouncing back. Felt like she NEEDED this win. So he makes sure she knows. But like I said earlier Lucy isn’t viewing it that way. Her perception is more than a little skewed atm. Her building anger at Tim has reached it's peak. She is cold to him and brisk as hell. Tim immediately picking up on her clipped ‘Thanks.’ Like she was going to be able to hide her anger and frustration from him. Girl no. Tim asks her what? Lucy shrugging him off once again.

Tim pulls on her arm gently and parrots her own damn words back at her from 5x21. That they’re not gonna work if she’s going to lie to him. Lucy conceding immediately to that. I mean they have a lot to work on communication wise, but they’ve also come really far in this aspect too. Don’t wanna disregard that. Look at Tim confronting this right away and communicating effectively. There are causes for excitement with that growth. That being said they have a ways to go. This fight is proof of that.

Lucy pulls zero punches when she asks if he undermined her today so she wouldn’t make detective? The absolute look of hurt painted across his beautiful face kills me. As you all know I relate with Tim so very much. He is so deeply loyal and loving. That any of his motives are to help those he loves around him. He truly thought he was helping her out today. Being supportive and helpful. So for her to come at him like this is leaving him stunned and extremely hurt.

His person the one person who knows him better than anyone, accusing him of something he would never even fathom doing. I was hurt for him watching this. Last thing he would ever do would be to hinder her intentionally. Loyalty to a fault is having someone else hurt you first before you’d ever do the same. That’s Tim. It’s why he is so defensive the rest of this scene. And rightfully so. I'm proud of him telling her it upset him she would even think that of him. Because IMO he did not undermine her. That man did what was asked of him.

All of Lucy’s pent up anxiety, anger, and frustration comes out full force at Tim in this scene. And my boy didn't deserve it. I was on his side the first time I watched it and I am now. I didn’t see that changing though lol. Do I understand what Lucy is going through? Yes. Good god yes. I've been her. I feel so much for what she's going though. I want to make that very clear. But Tim didn't deserve this barrage against him. Wanna also note i’m so proud of the writers for tackling mental health from the jump with this season. Both our babies got issues and this was the precursor to the season really. We just had no idea at the time....

Lucy assumed all day he was undermining her. Instead of just confronting that fact she sat in it. Stewed in it really. ALL. DAMN. DAY. Which isn’t like her. She is the type to face it right away and voice that to Tim. But didn’t this time. Giving us a little taste of their communication problems early on this season. There’s that saying. 'When you assume you make an ass out of you and me.’ And by the end of this convo Lucy is feeling like an ass. I guarantee you that .

Lucy continues to dig herself a hole when she bring up that maybe it was "unconscious". Not deliberate but also that he couldn’t help it. Which doesn’t make Tim feel any better. Nor would it make me feel any better either tbh….Basically saying he has no control over things he does. Which just insult to injury at this point for him. Then Lucy goes for her next punch below. One I still feel was unfairly delivered.

Does Tim still carry those issues? Of course he does. 100% that is still a weight on him. It’s reflected in the next ep when the subject of UC comes up. But does it belong in this fight with him? No. It has zero place in it. But like I said before she is feeling a loss of control and confidence in herself. So she is projecting her insecurities and feelings onto Tim. By bringing up his and using them to stabilize hers. It's a low blow she is dispatching to him.

She is running from her own feelings about this. She is also protecting herself by making it about Tim and his problems. (Which he has for sure) Because she isn’t ready to face the fact that she’s afraid of UC and all that will come with it. How being a detective on top of it is going to pull her from him even more.

She voiced these concerns in 5x19 when she was originally studying for her exam. It’s easier for her right now to hide in and blame Tim for his problems, than deal with her own right now. Tim’s reaction is so valid in this moment. Because to him all he did was have her back from the jump. He is feels sucker punched by this explosion and it's written all over his reaction.

Lucy asked him to help her. He did. Even told her it wouldn’t be easy and he wouldn’t be soft on her. She accepted the terms of this situation willingly. Tim supported her best he could through her meltdown. Did his damndest to not comment on it. He knows it’s her process to spiral a bit then right herself. Because he knows her so well. He had her back in trying to help figure out her wildcard. She rejected it and drowned.

Tim was calm and kind even if she didn’t recognize it about the exam. When she was doubting herself he built her up letting her know she can do it. Did his best to be in her corner if she truly felt she wasn’t ready. Then congratulated her when she got her case win. To Tim all that was him having her back.

It’s why he’s so blindsided and hurt by her words. Lucy is basically kicking him while he down in this moment and it hurt to watch. Because her anxiety and immense stress has blinded her. Making her act so very not like herself. She came at him with a one-two punch. First punch accusing him of undermining her and second being an unfair Isabel punch.

The K.O. punch really is him reading her face above. The way she looks at him when he says ‘But if you can’t see that then…’ Doesn’t even finish his sentence. He can read her just as well as she can read him. Lucy cannot see that right now. Too clouded by her extreme anxiety and stress to see him and his intentions clearly. So he ejects out of the convo. She has knocked him down for the count.

Tim can’t take the way she is looking at him right now. The way she is making him feel. Tim has always held how she viewed him in high regard. Nothing means more to him than what she thinks of him. So for her to level him with this is heartbreaking for him. So he reverts back to old Tim and clams up. Tells her he’s tired and for them to take the night off. Then walks away from her with no way for her to retort.

Lucy is a block of ice until this line of his. She was fully expecting him to apologize and go home with her. And he did not. He ejected out of the conversation to go lick his wounds. The look of shock on her face is everything. She wasn’t expecting that at all. You can see the panic on her face. That raw panic of her being left behind by him. Of Tim leaving her. The tears building in her eyes as he does this. Oh the painful foreshadowing that is this moment…..

The lyrics for this scene are so poignant and perfect. As is the entire musical lineup for this season. Perfectly encompasses Lucy in this episode and especially this scene. Here are some of my favs.

‘I think I’m losing my mind. I see you’re losing your light. Drowning out the decibels. Do you wanna find the antidote? Trying to watch my obstacles, see how fully I’ve been broke.’ Lucy is so broken in this episode and doesn’t reach out to the one person, her person to help fix her. She was drowning and went to him for the antidote and then refused it the entire time. Then gets consumed by it all.

Just a glaring look into how they both deal with being emotionally overwhelmed and vulnerable. And it’s not a good look for either of them this season tbh. But we start out with Lucy’s where I side with Tim before we go head long into Tim’s and I side with Lucy it's balanced at least lol. Damn good premiere though. I was buzzing with excitement after it.

As always thank you to anyone who read this. To all the likes, comments and or reblogs I may receive you are the best. I shall see you all in 6x02 :)

Side notes-Non Chenford

~~~~

Scruffy Tim in this ep has my ovaries in overdrive. Mmm just wanna nom on his jawline like corn on the cob.

Nyla Harper being a bad ass in a tense situation is primo. Can always count on her. The aftermath sucks for her though.

Angela being more excited to see a burrito than her husband is hilarious and so on brand haha

Main baddie gets eliminated at the end of the ep. Not sure I remember why tbh haha Things got hazy at the end of the season for me with the SL.

[crheativity]

is it okay to request platonic angst of leaving twisted wonderland and saying goodbye to the adeuce duo and Grim? I didn't see if you had a character limit, but if you do, feel free to ignore this or just do it with grim

SUMMARY: The time has come for you to depart from Twisted Wonderland. But surely Ace, Deuce and Grim will hear from you soon, right…?

WARNINGS: This is sad I nearly cried

COMMENTS: oh my GOSH writing angst is hard ahahaha. I seriously teared up writing this. I’m not sure if this is exactly what you wanted, but this is the first thing my mind came up with. Sorry this took so long, and I hope you enjoy it!!

(also, because this made me sad, I wrote a part two that can be found here. I hope you don’t mind!)

“Are you sure this’ll work?” Deuce fretted, wringing his shirt so hard you thought it was going to rip. He’d finally stopped pacing, at least. Moving to face you, his eyes locked on to yours, searching for any hint of doubt.

“Seriously dude, that’s the seventh time you’ve asked that in the past twenty minutes.” Ace complained loudly from his position propped against the wall. “Can you stop acting like a mother hen for five minutes? You’re starting to make me anxious,” he added, muttering under his breath.

The three of you and Grim were standing in the Mirror Hall as you double and triple checked your luggage, which Grim was perched on top of. He’d been strangely quiet ever since Crowley had summoned the both of you to his office.

Crowley had calmly explained that he (in his generosity) had finally found a way for you to return home. Grim had congratulated you and helped you pack, just as the others had, but most times he just remained quiet. You figured this was him trying to be strong for you. The thought brought the sting of tears to your eyes. You hastily blinked them back. Now was not the time.

“It’ll be alright, don’t worry.” You looked up and gave your friends the most reassuring smile you could muster, despite the lump in your throat and the niggling doubts in the back of your mind. “Crowley gave me his word that this’d work.”

Three sets of mouths immediately fell open as Ace, Deuce and Grim stared at you in horror. Your grin widened as you enjoyed the moment, before deciding to put them out of their misery. “Relax you guys. I also checked with Malleus, Lilia, Idia and Ortho. All of them said that there is no reason they could think of that my phone should not still work in my world, as long as I can charge it. And I can.”

A collective sigh of relief flooded the room. Ace walked over and punched you lightly in the arm.

“Not funny, Prefect. That’s Deuce’s last clean shirt and you scared him so bad he almost ripped it in half just now.”

“Ah- hey! This isn’t my last clean shirt!” Deuce protested, rolling his eyes.

“Oh yeah?” Ace retorted. He crossed his arms and stared at Deuce, his eyes narrowing. “That’s weird. If that’s the case then why are there so many random clothes strewn across the floor of our dorm?”

“Those are yours!”

“Enough, guys.” You sighed, tired of their bickering. “This might be the last time we see each other face to face for a while. Do you really wanna spend it bickering about clothes?”

Both boys shared a glance and then sighed.

“You’re right. I’m sorry, Prefect. Sorry, Ace.” Deuce mumbled. He looked away, fidgeting with his jacket sleeve.

“It’s not your fault,” Ace sighed, “I’m the one who started it. My bad, you guys.”

“Ah, how nice to see three - ah, forgive me, two and a half - of my freshmen getting along so well! Surely this must have something to do with my excellent guidance as headmage, hm?” Crowley spoke suddenly, making the four of you jump. None of you had noticed him come in. The sight of him made your hopes soar and your heart sink.

It was time to go.

Ace opened his mouth and grumbled something that made Deuce stand on his foot. You had to repress a slight giggle as Ace glared at Deuce.

“Well then, shall we get cracking?” Crowley strode towards the Dark Mirror, evidently ignoring Ace and Deuce’s exchange.

Sharing a worried glance with your friends, the four of you made your way towards the Dark Mirror. Ace gently scooped Grim into his arms as Deuce grabbed your bag - you’d only needed one - and carried it to the mirror, which had begun to glow.

“If you’d like to say any last goodbyes, now would be the time. My, aren’t I generous for allowing you all a second last goodbye?” Crowley exclaimed as he got to work with the Mirror, which glowed ever brighter by the second.

You turned to face the others and Deuce immediately pulled you into a bone crushing hug. You readily accepted, wrapping your arms around him and giving him a tight squeeze.

“Come on guys, really?” Ace complained. Deuce immediately grabbed him and pulled him into the hug. He - and Grim, still sitting in his arms - didn’t resist.

“It- it’ll be okay.” You managed, hating how nervous you sounded. “Crowley and the others have said they’ll look for a way for me to come and visit. And- and I’ll be looking too, alright? So we’ll probably see each other soon.”

You pulled away from the hug just in time to see Ace and Deuce exchange worried glances. Then, looking back to you, they both nodded in sync.

Just as Grim burst into tears.

Scooping the cat from Ace’s arms you hugged him tight. Forcing hot tears away, you held him as long as you could, but all too soon a hand landed on your shoulder.

“It’s time.” Crowley spoke softly and gently - almost kindly.

“Don’t forget to text us as soon as you get through.” Deuce said. His eyes were red and his voice was full of emotion.

“Yeah, or else we’ll have to come looking for you.” Ace said with a smirk, gesturing to himself, Deuce and Grim, who was still sniffling. You could tell he was trying to be the strong one, as the other two were in tears.

You smiled at him - at all of them.

“Thank you guys. For everything.”

Ace’s smile faltered.

Turning around so you wouldn’t have to see them cry, you picked up your bags and stared at the mirror.

You didn’t want to leave.

Everyone had been so kind to you here. There had been ups and downs, but everything had seemed worth it. You were with people who’d walk to the ends of the land for you, and you would do the same for them.

You felt your resolve breaking. You couldn’t leave, you just couldn’t.

Digging deep for some scrap of resolve, you forced one foot in front of the other.

You didn’t look back.

♥Thank you for reading!! I hope you enjoyed it!!♥

[eternal-kosmo-ghoul]

*°:⋆ₓₒ day 6. wax play

.｡❅*⋆⍋*∞*｡ “candle queen”

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ — ❤︎ the scent of the candles just made this year extra cozy, maybe sodo has some tricks up his sleeve for how to make things cozier

pairing: sodo ghoul x afab!reader

a/n: i want sodo

cw: nsfw content. making out. wax play. bondage. tail fucking. sodo is a little shit.

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“fuck you turn me on, especially when you’re covered in all of that…” —❤︎

┅✦┅

a long day from running christmas errands really took out a piece of your soul.

slamming the doors shut with a relieved sigh, you dragged the many bags from your holiday haul. what a relief that was, you finally knocked out all of the important stuff on your list.

groaning from the fatigue of carrying so many items all at once, you dragged your body over to the living quarters where all the ghouls resided, standing in the middle of the halls with one bag in hand. the halls were decorated to fit the seasonal festivities of christmas. cute little decorated plushies filled the shelves, small pine trees with glossy and colorful ornaments hung up on each one. paper snowflakes strung up on the ceiling to simulate that crystallizing beauty of snow falling on the ground.

the sight of it was just gorgeous, and rather touching. it almost made you forget about your exhausting trip. however, there was a reason you went out on a chilly winter night.

a certain fire ghoul had requested you buy something specific for… “special reasons”, as he phrased it. you had no idea what the little scamp could possibly be thinking of doing with the items you got for him. but the way he spoke to you about it, it indicated something much more intimate.

“hello?” you called out, trying to coax out that devilishly handsome firecracker, the sound of your voice echoing off the church halls.

and speak of the devil himself, as you were about to turn around to exit the ghouls dorms, a pair of charred arms wrapped around your waist and pulled you into their chest. you looked down to see the recognizable brazen hands of sodo, who’s face was buried into the back of your shoulder, nuzzling into it affectionately.

“missed me that much?” you asked with an amused chuckle, and the little spitfire only let out a cute little ‘hmph’, before burying his face into your shoulder more.

“more than you can imagine.” sodo replied in a slightly hoarse voice, his breath hot against your delicate skin, making you shudder.

the fire ghoul took notice to this, and immediately started nipping his teeth at your skin, being careful to make sure his fangs didn’t pierce your flesh. you let out soft, quiet gasps at the feeling, and he grinned into the crook of your neck.

“did you get them?” he asked, fangs ghosting over the lobe of your ear. you let out a shaky sigh.

“yes.” you replied.

sodo let out a satisfied groan at that answer.

“good.” he practically growled into your skin. “let’s use them now.”

“now?”

“you know i’m an impatient ghoul, and my dick is already hard down here.”

it was true. you could feel sodo’s not-so-little friend poking you behind onto your ass. you snickered at this, and teasingly pushed your lower body against his clothed dick, making sodo groan with need and frustration.

“fuck.” he uttered out.

“wow, you’re really hard just from the sheer thought of what we’re about to do.” you teased, turning around to face him. “horny little ghoul.”

“shut up.” he spat back, but when he met your gaze, he couldn’t resist a cocky grin forming on his blazing features.

the two of you shared a look, before sodo leaned down to whisper into your ear. “let’s take this to my bedroom now, shall we?”

you nodded in agreement, feeling your excitement pool into the core of your stomach and between your legs.

“lets.”

—

“lay down on the bed for me, darling.”

an amused grin made its way to your face at the fire ghoul’s sudden command.

“so demanding… and we haven’t even done anything yet.”

“mmmh, shut up, come here.”

sodo let out a devious purr, his hot breath tickling your skin before he pulled you in for a fierce, searing kiss, his lips pressed against yours that screamed for lustful contact. the two of you giggled into the kiss and continued to make out like your lives depended on it. his lips tasted ashy, and with a hint of bitterness, like there was a light layer of brimstone on his lips, but his taste was addicting. sodo pushed you down onto the bed, crawling on top of you while his lips remained locked with yours.

sodo didn’t waste any time discarding your clothes. he was unraveling your naked body like an early christmas present, in which it felt like it was. he didn’t stop until both you and him were completely bare for the world to see.

his tattooed fingers gripped your wrists as he continued to make out with you, pushing his forked, ghoulish tongue into your mouth to intertwine with yours, creating lewd, sloppy sounds that had you both drooling and moaning.

“shit… you’re so fucking addicting.” sodo groaned, his tail reaching for something in the nightstand. he then pulled out what seemed to be red rope.

you just let out a lusty chuckle, eyes half lidded from the pleasure. “yeah, i know i’m hot shit”

sodo scoffed playfully at your arrogance.

“narcissist.”

“not my fault you’re so desperate to get into my pants.”

the spitfire only muttered a quick ‘shut up’ before bringing the rope to his hands, forcing your wrists upwards and tying your hands to the bed frame with swiftness and precision. the force of tightness binding your wrists together made you curse.

“fuck. that hurts.” you rasped out, voice hoarse from all of the kissing.

“that’s the point.” sodo snarled out quickly, licking his lips at the sight of your body completely bare and immovable, all for sodo to have fun with.

sodo’s hands greedily grasped at any bare flesh he could get his claws on, softly kneading the smooth skin underneath his palms. his demonic tail coiled over your leg, and the spade of it flicked teasingly against your aching clit, making you gasp.

“fuck!” you managed out, and sodo chuckled darkly above you.

“ah, there they are. that’s the naughty little pet i know.” sodo sung lustfully, before he grabbed another item.

it was the thing that you bought during your christmas errands— shea butter candles. sodo wanted to keep things extra cozy for the holiday season, and to of course stay close with his lover. so, he had an interesting, yet exciting idea on how to do that.

taking one of the candles, he straddled your legs and lit one of them with a flickering flame dancing on his fingertips, watching the wax slowly melt from the base. his tail was still teasing your sensitive folds, and sodo was reveling in how you were reacting. you were gasping and grunting, mostly from anticipation, and he was having such a power trip.

“now, let’s get started.”

the shea butter wax has this almost silky texture to it as it was melting from the top, and the fire only softly illuminated yours and sodo’s features in the dark, creating an atomosohere that screamed kinkiness and desire. the wax dripped onto your smooth skin, and sodo rolled the candle in the fingers to allow more of it to drip onto your body.

the feeling of the hot, almost scalding wax made your body jolt with both pleasure and pain, but the pain wasn’t actually harmful— only created a sense of excitement that electrified throughout your body.

as you let out airy and high pitched moans from Sodo pouring the wax all across your arms, legs, chest and torso, his tail stayed between your legs and teasing your soft, puffy cunt.

“s-sodo..” you moaned out, the burning hot wax making every other touch on your body ten times more sensitive, but it only fueled your arousal even more.

“that’s it…” sodo whispered into your ear, the spade of his tail finally entering your hole. you cried out at the feeling, and your legs twitched. the red rope binding your wrists kept them secure, and you squirmed around when sodo’s tail started to thrust in and out of your wet, needy walls. your pussy clenched around sodo’s tail refusing to let go.

“fuck you turn me on, especially when you’re covered in all of that…” sodo growled out, his lips attacking your neck briefly. his cock was hard and was leaking precum, which shimmered underneath the soft glow of the candle.

he kept the candle dripping all over your thighs, some of it even going between your inner thighs.

the heat radiating off of the wax only made you more wet, and sodo’s tail was brushing up against all of the right crevices and corners inside of you. you could feel an orgasm approaching soon.

“s-sodo… fuck! i-i’m gonna cum…!” you warned, wrists clanging against the bed frame and toes curling into the bedsheets from how good sodo was fucking you.

he let out a soft chuckled and pushed his tail deeper inside of you.

“then cum for me.” he encouraged teasingly, watching your face contort into one of pure bliss.

you screamed, and came hard, the sensitivity from the wax making your orgasm more intense. cum coated sodo’s tail, leaving a sticky, gooey trail of the viscous liquid as it dribbled out of your sensitive hole. your body was left shaking from the aftershocks, and it felt so, so damn good.

you panted heavily, and sodo grinned, snuffing out the candle and putting it aside, before brushing the hair out of your sweat-slicked forehead.

“that was hot.” he whispered. “both literally and figuratively.”

you laughed at his little joke, still tired from your climax. “you’re so corny.”

“yeah, i know i am.” sodo grinned.

his claws traced over the wax that stuck to your body, watching it harden and stay clamped onto your skin. sodo chuckled and untied the ribbon, before scooping you up and smiling affectionately at you.

“now let’s get this all cleaned up.”

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[ejzah]

As promised, here is a summary of my experience at Epic Cons Chicago and meeting Eric! I’m including some of the pictures I took (with poor attempts to censor my face). Heads up, this is a long post.

I started off early in the morning with a long drive since I’m a scaredy cat and avoid the expressway as much as possible. The convention center was very full when I arrived and it took about 50 minutes for me to register because the process didn’t seem well-organized, so that wasn’t the most fun.

But after that, I was on my way to watch Eric’s panel! The panel he appeared on, had actors from several different shows, so he wasn’t asked that many questions. As usual though, he was charming and disarming. One fan asked everyone what word they would use to describe their character and I believe Eric chose “fearless vulnerability”, which is technically two words, but so very in character for Eric. I always love listening to him talk about Deeks and the depth that he infused into the character.

I have a few poorly filmed videos from the panel that I can share if you message me. I’d rather not post them just in case my account would get deactivated again. I thought of asking a question myself, but chickened out.

After that I had a very long break before my next event, so I got some tacos from a little place inside convention center. I’d give them a 5/10. They were overpriced, pretty tiny, and overall mediocre.

Now on to the really good parts!

Next I attended a meet and greet with Eric. I was super nervous leading up to it, and kind of regretted the tacos at that point. About ten of us were ushered into a small private room with chairs set up in a circle. We were instructed not to take any videos, picture, etc, before the start, so I don’t have any additional content. Eric came in a few minutes later and ended up sitting one seat over from me (😱), which was pretty darn distracting for me.

After telling us he’d never done a meet and greet before, answered several questions and chatted with us. One of the things that really struck me was just as with every video and interview I’ve seen over the years, is that Eric was so genuine, honest, and generous.

In answer to questions, he talked about the last few seasons and why there were some irregularities. Such as that the show was supposed to end after season nine and each season after that was considered a bonus and based on ability to form a tight budget. He also confirmed that none of them knew what was in “the box” aside from possibly Shane Brennan.

The greet part of the event went by far too quickly, and before we knew it, one of the volunteers announced it was time for the selfie portion. Fortunately, another fan noticed I had been trying to ask a question and spoke up for me.

Before I asked my question, I just couldn’t pass up the opportunity to shoutout wikiDeeks first. Eric really lit up and expressed how much he appreciated the hard work and thought put into the writing and contributions. He brought up an episode many fans had issues with (we figured out it was probably from the FLETC episode that shall go unnamed), and said he showed a piece of wikiDeeks writing to the writers/TPTB and basically said that it was deeper and better writing. I believe that might have been @anonkp’s wonderful work! In general, he was very appreciative and complimentary of everyone at wikiDeeks. He’s so very gracious!

We were really short on time, but I did get to ask the question “what would you change about Deeks if you could?” Eric couldn’t come up with a response on the spot, so he asked me the same question in return. I told him I didn’t think anything needed to be changed about Deeks, but didn’t always enjoy how silly he was written in later seasons.

Eric shared that he tried to play those moments in a way that put Deeks in on the joke instead of being the butt of the joke as much as he could. Unfortunately, he didn’t always have that luxury.

During our conversation, Eric was very engaging and attentive. For those couple minutes, I forgot to be nervous because he made the atmosphere so comfortable. It felt like he genuinely cared about what I was saying. My only regret is that I didn’t have time to emphasize how much I appreciate Eric’s acting and portrayal of Deeks.

After that, it was selfie time! When it was my turn, Eric bent down to my level (oh my lord he’s tall), naturally in my usual awkward way, I bent down too. 🤦🏻‍♀️ Hopefully Eric saw it as charming rather than incredibly silly and awkward. Hey, at least I made him laugh, right?

He’s so beautiful!

If any fans on here were present for the meet and greet, please let me know if I forgot anything or misremembered events. My memory is often faulty.

I also chose to get a professional shot with Eric and for that one I got a hug! I’m still not over it yet.

It was a really long day and a lot of driving, but so worth it for the chance to meet and talk with Eric. And, I’m pretty sure I came out this experience even more of a fan of Eric than ever.

[misc-obeyme]

You know what time it is.

Lesson 33 spoilers, including the hard lesson, here we go!

I am pleased. And I am not pleased.

I had so many great moments with all my faves. Solomon being there for me, Levi being a lil cutie, THIRTEEN DATE, Barbatos giving me lil Ds. What glorious moments. I shall share some screenshots momentarily.

BUT FIRST.

Belphie. What the fuck.

Technically, this is Mammon’s fault. He was the one who was like it’s not wrong to feel upset about it and like yeah he’s right, but Belphie is clearly taking that statement to an EXTREME.

We are dealing with YANDERE BELPHIE, my friends.

If I remember correctly, he was always supposed to be yandere. So now we’re really leaning into that, huh? Like straight up, I am going to keep you here forever because you’ll be happier with me than if you leave. Our boy’s gone a little off the deep end lol. I kinda love it.

Though I was really surprised by his final line of “I don’t want you to see what’s inside my head.” He seemed really concerned about it. Considering all we’ve seen already, it can’t be that bad, right? Then again, I wouldn’t want anyone I know to get inside my head, either. Please stay out, you don’t need to see the horrors, thanks.

Also, we still haven’t made a pact with Levi. Just like we didn’t actually make a pact with Beel. Is it because now they’re not sure they want to have pacts with us because of the whole needing magic to get back to the human world thing? I swear I have a memory of Solomon telling us that we could make pacts with all of the brothers at the same time. But we already have pacts with three of them? So why would we only make pacts with three or four of them at the same time? I’m so confused. Someone please share your thoughts with me on this because I don’t get it???

I really feel like they directly addressed some of the concerns we’ve all been having in this lesson, too. I mean Solomon straight up talks about wondering what the brothers we left behind are doing. Or if time is still going there or if we’ll end up exactly where we left etc etc. HOWEVER all that soup talk makes me think they are just going to mesh it all together. ‘Cause Solomon also said this:

What does that mean? How can the future brothers influence what’s happening in the past? Unless their memories are changing in real time… ugh why did they have to go with time travel shenanigans?? Don’t they know this junk hurts my brain??

Anyway, now it’s time for some of my favorite moments, enough about time travel and feelings and pacts!

Because my favorite sorcerer also said this. And I know there are some questions about his motives and blah blah but I don’t care. I love him. He’ll be all serious, then say something sweet and reassuring, then do something crazy or try to cook again… he’s got so many sides to him lol.

STOP MAKING ME LIKE YOU MEPHISTOPHELES. (Please you were like the last character I was neutral about I can’t afford to get obsessed with anyone else.)

Honestly, I laughed so hard when he said this. Mammon just called him out directly and he LAUGHED. He laughed and was like yeah duh of course, idiots. And look how pleased he is about it, too.

May I bring your attention to my baby Levi? Look at this silly guy. I was so happy I got to hug him. And the group hug was adorable, too. Satan protesting the whole time lol. Lucifer coming in and being like… I regret asking.

I swear sometimes I wanna kiss this guy JUST to watch him blush. It’s so freakin’ cute.

Smitten. I am smitten.

The way she’s like I don’t get why you like these weirdos, but I know they matter to you. Don’t worry, it’s going to work out. How she gets all defensive of MC. Her cute little smile. The way she suggests coming to visit MC in the human world & saying that Solomon can come too?! LIKE. I love her so much.

HE KNOWS.

Listen I was thrilled about this whole part - Barbatos being mysterious and giving me a weird piece of paper and a Little D? Yes forever. But also I think we’ve all suspected him of knowing the truth and this part right here just solidifies that for me. He definitely knows. He knows everything about what’s going on. I don’t think that means he’s Nightbringer or even that he’s working with Nightbringer. He could just know because he’s got access to all of time and what not. But either way, he knows.

Honestly I love Barbatos so much. Just the small parts we had with him were enough to get me in my feels. I also really enjoyed the hard lesson because even if Luke doesn’t know what’s going on, I think Simeon does. And their discussion was interesting.

So I’m gonna leave you with one last Barb moment.

I’m so impatient is it the end of the season yet?? I wanna know how it ends right NOW.

[marengogo]

Are You Sure?! - #2: The Right Side of the Bed

Interlude: Shadow - by SUGA  [Map of The Soul: 7]

[Music is a very big part of my life and I’m MOSTLY INCAPABLE of writing without music, so I just thought I'd share what I am listening to while writing this]

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Hello my Bangtan Loving Gurls, Bois  & Enbys,

How have you been? Yesterday was a bit shit in Tanniedom, wasn’t it? But fret not! My Spousy @chikooritajjk has us covered. They have written and most likely still writing ARMY-SPIRIT-UPLIFTING posts and for that and many other things I am super grateful, so do check them out if you need a boost of positivity. Hence, I thought I’d venture into giving us also a very little break from all dat and talk about our recent Are You Sure?! VMINKOOK Edition episodes, as there actually is a lot to unpack at the same time I am also working on another post which I actually started before this, like on Monday, about certain type of 431s (for does who don’t know, 431 stands for ARMY) and it is not the most “positive” post so maybe I’ll wait until Mercury Retrograde ends to post it 🤡… which is in 1 day.  Ayte then! Let’s start, shall we?

Now, y’all know I’m OT7 right? If it is your first time landing on my page, do not that I am OT7, it is very important to me, and to you as well, trust me bro! Yet, I know many also have biases, which is perfectly fine in my books, as long as you do respect all the other members as well. It is very much impossible, in my not-so-humble opinion, to do any relationship assessment if you hate/dislike/don’t respect to a certain level/don’t understand aspects that are intrinsic parts of the environment of what/whom you are trying to analyse. Already having a bias can affect opinions if not controlled being OT7 is also having a bias by the way, but Hate … child … Hate is The Ultimate Influencer, but so is Love, by the way, which is why The Gray of it All is important during discussions like this one. That being said, let me spell it out so that we have no confusion or misunderstandings.

Tae & JK are very intrinsic parts of JM’s life. 

JM & JK are very intrinsic parts of Tae’s life. 

JM & Tae are very intrinsic parts of JK’s life. 

This is the same and equally important for all 3 of them for all 7 really, however, the degree, intensity and shape they take into each other’s life is different depending on the pairing, and this episode gave us a trivial synopsis taste of all 3 dynamics, which you could only observe and appreciate if you allowed Mx. Gray do their thing and let Hate and Love sit this one out, or comfortably watch the backseat, to each theirs.  

Let’s start by setting the scene. Ignoring what Capulets, Montagues and the VPD have to say, with their weird-ass, borderline-offensive and obtuse takes: Are You Sure?! Is a JK and JM show. Does it mean they hate the rest of the members? No. Does it mean they are trying to leave the band? No. Does it mean that they have finally decided to cave in and provide shippers with the ever-sought fanservice they’ve all been waiting for? No. All it ever was meant to be, was a single travel vlog from these two particular members who expressed the desire of wanting to spend some quality time together and share said time with ARMY. Simple as that. Eventually, regardless of JM’s IBM and JK’s cold, they had so much fun that they decided to go on one more trip, and that apparently was such a blast, that they decided to make a whole show out of it.

It is important however to point out, and rationally acknowledge, that both JK and JM have tried their darn, polite and explicit, best to make sure that it was understood that this show was something they wanted to do just the two of them. They loved the time they spent with Tae, no doubt about that. If you ask me, they actually made an exception because it was Tae and would have probably refused the Hyungs y’all vibes don’t really check out like that, for this type of trips, sorry 🤡. Even so, they have Bon Voyage, In The Soop, private time, and they can even create a Makane Line Show if they want, where they can satisfy the desire to travel together. Furthermore, the fact that no other guest was invited to Sapporo, coupled with JK jokingly mentioning that they should hone their vlogger skills and keep going until they turn 50 years in addition to other comments, in my opinion, makes it pretty clear that they just want it to be a JungJi thing now that JungJi is a thing, or JimKook or whatever for reasons they only know, and we may never.

The Guest

Do you know the type of confidence you have to have to, so nonchalantly and publicly, let it be known, that you are aware of the fact of being a guest? HYB3 could have easily marketed this as a subunit show, with mainly JK & JM as units. USA - JK & JM; Jeju - VMINKOOK; Sapporo JK & JM. It wouldn’t MAINLY JK & JM because, as we all should know by now, IT IS A JK AND JM SHOW. Yet, here he is, Tae in all his glory, spending time on an island he seems to care about for his own reasons with people he obviously loves and feels so much at ease with:

Things like sleeping in a bed he knew was supposed to “be JM’s” he could only pull off because he knew that JM wouldn’t care about it, in the same way JK & JM raced for the other available bed like they knew they were okay with sharing it. 

In general,Tae is the band’s Englishman in New York. He does thing at his own pace, feels emotions with his own intensity and also understands things at his his own pace which has come to bite him in the ass many a time 🤡 …. He is also a man who quickly adapts in any given situation and isn’t shy about getting what he needs with/around people he is completely at ease with, such as a deep conversation with JM, all kinds of foolery with JK, absolute cosyness with JM and/or tenderness with JK. He is also extremely tactile, and if he is comfortable with you he will promptly ignore any personal space, almost as if physically connecting with you is the one way he can connect with you on all levels, which doesn’t sit well with everyone, and Tae will try his best to understand why on Earth you would reject his embrace, LOL, like when Joonie didn’t want to hug while sleeping during Bon Voyage season 4. 

Throughout episode 3 and 4, it felt to me like Tae had things going on and was perhaps past the processing time, and needed some wholesome I-don’t-want-to-think/distraction time, which is why he was with Wooga and JK & JM in this particular period of time. It’s almost as if he was looking for some kind of relief. Like he wanted to know that things wouldn’t change when in the presence of people with whom he needed things not to change. If he had things his way, I’m sure he would have had Hobi be also part of this Jeju trip  but as we all know …. Whatever he was trying to process he really didn’t want to think about, so he ventured out into places where people would allow him to just be. 

In fact, I’m not sure if people have noticed but, during this Jeju trip, in many an instance Tae has for example allowed himself to slide himself in and out of situation or just do as he pleased, irrespective of what the other two did, for example, he was having a phone-conversation about a gym with an acquaintance of his while they were at the cafe, or stayed alone on one side of the boat, while the other two were fishing right next to each other. 

Tae was basically living the type of holiday I would aspire to experience at this time in my life. I had a difficult break up at the start of the year which sometimes I still questions, but I honestly know it was for the best and even though I want to be alone, I have accepted that human beings are not islands, and to that respect, I am lucky enough to be around people who let me just be, they involve me the right amount, I involve myself the right amount, but for the rest I am allowed to just space out when I do, or get lost in my cell phone, or heavily rant, or do whatever other random thing comes to mind of recent. Obviously, I don’t know what most have happened to Tae, but I think that Tae also has this type of relationship with his close friends, be it Wooga or Bangtan. In particular, when it comes to JK, he is able to enjoy comradery, understanding and tenderness, whereas when it comes to JM he can relish in comfort, reassurance and allowance. 

The Hosts

JM and JK have been formidable hosts, in my humble opinion, or at least the type of hosts that I would like. If we follow my line of thought where I think something was bothering Tae, they have tried their best to involve Tae in everything they did as a means of distracting him, in the best way they could, while still keeping true to themselves. And even though, on different occasions, they have pointed out that Tae was a guest because my boys had plans with each other, which couldn’t be carried out as a pair, but the fact that a guest is actually present means they are fully on board with it all, BUT they still need to somehow mourn their foiled plans, I am pretty sure it was just part of their usual a maknae-line role-play/banter. Furthermore, for the most part, they also didn’t force Tae to participate in things after they asked him once, and he’d refuse. They really did let him be, but always made sure to try and involve him where they could.

Basically JK and JM came ready to do what they had planned to do and they were comfortable enough to also do it with their guest in such a way that they didn’t feel obliged to change anything, because they knew that they could be themselves in the presence of Tae. For example, I’m not sure why, but I knew that Tae was gonna sleep in JM’s bed, because JM is never averse to Tae’s tactfulness Joonie, we ain’t judging you 🤡, JK we ain’t judging you either! if anything, he embraces it; JM seems to be the type of person that amplifies your traits. So my question, leading to the sleeping scene was: will JM sleep with Tae or would JK sleep on the spare bed as a consequence of JM ending up on the other bed because of seniority?

You should have seen my shocked face when JK & JM came running into the room and were already aiming for “JK’s bed”. There was no shock at the fact that Tae was already occupying JM’s bed, it was like they already knew that there would have been only JK’s bed available, and apparently the mattress wasn’t an option which is ironic for a person who is known for having mattresses scattered around his house. But let’s go deeper. Not only did they immediately aim for JK’s bed, but they both seemed to aim for the right side of the bed. At some point during the night, they both took a shower, after playing in the pool, and JM seems to have taken a shower upstairs as they showed JK entering the downstairs bathroom.

If JM took a shower upstairs, he would have seen Tae in his bed watching TV and most likely would have chatted with him and found out that Tae wasn’t feeling too great, which as we saw he then told JK. Thus, there must have been a moment where JM and JK discussed bed allocations before going upstairs and we are going to ignore, for the time being, that both their luggages are on the ground floor … this eventually turned into a race/game as JK sprinted for the right side of the bed, a side which so far, we’ve only seen JM sleep in, as JK has, thus far, only slept on the left side of any bed. 

So now we have a situation where JM is on the left and JK is on the right and they don’t bother changing, but they’ve kinda promised each other not to hit each other, so they are somewhat self-conscious, and stay quite far apart, most likely to assure that they don’t hit each other. Yet, as the night passes you can notice that my Twin-flame subconsciously gets closer to JM. I think he was particularly stressed about not hitting JM at which point he wakes up and decides to go and sleep on the left side of the floor mattress. And me being me thought “If they were cuddled together, they wouldn’t have hit each other…” which made me realise that perhaps JK hit JM in the CT cabin because they were sleeping apart, like on that bed in Jeju, but in opposite positions, because you know … cameras on and all. 

Bed arrangement aside, there are little things that seem to be a constant with the two of them, such as JK ordering food for the both of them, or JM making sure to order food for JK. If we want to be super specific, JK making sure to know if JM is having fun, JM asking JK specifically if JK has tweezers but not asking Tae, who quite quickly gets into his personal space and offers to take whatever hair out with his bare fingers. “Let’s shower”, “let’s eat ramyeon”, “let’s go to bed” … almost everything they do, seems like they want to do together, same as all the activities they have chosen, they seem to have chosen to each other's liking, exerting activities for JK, ocean activities for JM, as well as excellent restaurants for the both of them. In addition “JK, are you no longer hungry?”, “JMsshi you are not eating well”, “JK relax your shoulders”, “JM is prettier …” they also seem to be very attentive to each other, constantly. In fact, if I were to summarise their relationship based on these two episodes, I would say that JK and JM relish in longing, consideration and intimacy.

Episode 4 is by far my favourite episode, and the one I’ve admittedly watched the most. It allowed me to explore all these dynamics and the three of them just seemed to live through their personas so nicely, without having to worry too much about having to entertain while being unintentionally entertaining, like taekook hitting their head on the same spot on the boat or JM giving JK “CPR” as a consequence. NGL to you, I am really looking forward to episode 5. It is their last night together and I think our hosts are truly enjoying their time with their guest. As it is their last night, JK and JM will probably try to be entertaining enough for their guest and Tae will probably try to be just as easy-going to his hosts, regardless, their serenity and lightheartedness is quite soothing to me, so I honestly CAN’T WAIT.   

Always respectfully yours 🫰🏾💜,

Marengo. 

[athanasius-symposium-of-writings]

Thirsty day here we come!

This thirst goes to our sexy French daddy Joseph!

Imagine being in a match with Joseph but you accidentally damaged his camera and sword when kiting him ( which made him furious but he kept a straight face even though you could tell he was pissed ) you of course apologised thousands of times feeling embarrassed but he dismissed it saying it’s nothing. After the match you and your teammates lost ( you assume his damaged belongings is what made him more aggressive in the match telling how roughly he threw you on the chair ) thus everyone going in their rooms to sleep to recover all the bruises.

You of course still guilty gain the courage to enter the hunter’s side and ask for Joseph’s whereabouts and geisha was kind enough to lead you to his room. Once she left , you knocked on the door which opened and revealed Joseph looking slightly annoyed but surprised to see you. You explain how you wanted to help fix his things and wanted to make it up for him.

And now here you are striped down from your clothes and forced on Joseph’s lap facing him while cock warming him. He smirks at your whimpering while he continues to read his book out loud in French occasionally squeezing your thighs, and groping your ass, giving you a glare if you dare to move and groaning whenever your pussy squeezes his cock. He’d also whisper in French in your ear enjoying how you’d clench tighter.

“Now now my dear, stop moving and behave”

“What a lewd women you are”

“Shhhh go to sleep, I’ll be right here”

He wouldn’t call you a whore or a slut noooo no way he’s too much of a gentleman…….so he’ll just say it French!

Oh arent you sweet

Rated Explicit

The swordsman is not actually upset, there is no point in being upset as the cameras are easily replaced by the Baron. Have you not noticed how they change with his attire as requested by Lady Nightingale? One broken camera means nothing, but it is amusing to apologize for something that merits no apology. Tons have been broken before and many more will be as the matches go on.

Your need to project these common ramble ideas can wear on him, however, he uses them to his advantage like now.

How amusing you are willing to do anything to be in his good graces, like a dog. Yes, a dog, his puppy who whines in shame and obeys their master's whim.

Pathetic in a charming way, only for him.

When he was younger, from the pieces he can recall of his memory, he indulged in many proclivities. Sex is one of them. Easily learning his likes and dislikes.

A favorite is having your heat around his cock but not moving. You are to simply warm it up as he reads his book. It's the one you suggested! The Scarlet Pimpernel, is an interesting story.

“Mon salope,” His slut, “Behave yourself. I am still deciding if I forgive you.” Foolish you taking the supposed punishment all for yourself, maybe you like trying to make excuses to have him fuck you? Would make sense why you think you must do anything to please him. Reality will set in soon when you realize he could care less about the thoughts and actions of others in the match. Or you will remain a fool and keep entertaining him like the hopeless dog you are.

He yawns, “Tonight you will remain with me. In the morning, we shall share breakfast.” There is no room for negotiations or excuses, you will do as he says.

“Joseph…” 

“Shh, sleep petit chiot.” The shifting to lay down have you squeezing around him, good. Good, you are sensitive to him and only him. “I expect you to wake when I awaken.” Kissing your forehead.

You whimper but nod.