#Off-White | Fall Winter 2020/2021

[beardedmrbean]

Boston University’s Center for Antiracist Research, headed by critical race theory activist Ibram X. Kendi, revealed last week that it was laying off about 40% of its staff as part of organization restructuring. About 15 to 20 of its approximately 45 employees were let go. Testimonies from former employees have exposed alleged mismanagement of Kendi’s center, which in turn has exposed the fraudulence and fragility of the diversity, equity, and inclusion complex.

Disgruntled former employees have accused Kendi of mishandling grant funding, failing to complete major projects, and fostering an exploitative company culture in which he ruled with an iron fist yet was routinely missing in action. The center has raked in $43 million since its inception, according to 2021 budget records obtained by the Daily Free Press. It received corporate support from Peloton, Deloitte, Stop & Shop, TJX Companies, and Deckers Outdoor Corporation, according to a 2020–2021 donor report. Only six weeks after its launch, then-CEO of Twitter Jack Dorsey gifted $10 million without conditions.

“Your $10M donation, with no strings attached, gives us the resources and flexibility to greatly expand our antiracist work,” Kendi posted at the time. “The endowment is vital, as we build our new Center.”

Despite the investments, the center did not deliver on some key priorities, such as the much-hyped Racial Data Tracker that would document racial inequities in all sectors of society to finally root out racism.

“I don’t know where the money is,” Saida Grundy, a BU professor who worked at the center from fall 2020 to spring 2021, told the Boston Globe after the staff cuts.

Multiple other BU professors served as faculty leads on various projects at the center. Professor Sanaz Mobasseri of BU’s business school led the Antiracist Tech Initiative, professor Kaylene Stevens of BU’s education school led the “Designing Antiracist Curricula” team, and political science professor Spencer Piston led the Policy Office, for example.

In December 2021, Grundy emailed BU provost Jean Morrison that the organization had been showing a “pattern of amassing grants without any commitment to producing the research obligated” by them.

Like its umbrella idea DEI, “antiracism” actually translates to, well, nothing of note. Serial academics such as Kendi have built careers around racial fearmongering, even inventing new disciplines to study racism and its early-stage minutiae “microaggressions” and “implicit bias.” Rather than confront actual crimes of racism, these courses seek to aggressively manufacture racist intent.

Despite all this bureaucracy, academic DEI projects have unclear aims and products. Kendi’s center published just two research papers since its founding, the Washington Free Beacon reported. A January paper, "Association of Neighborhood Racial and Ethnic Composition and Historical Redlining With Build Environment Indicators Derived From Street View Images,” found that predominantly black neighborhoods had more dilapidated buildings than white neighborhoods. The center released a report from its "Antibigotry Convening” from fall 2021 and winter 2022 that included many intersectionality themes such as “Ageism,” "Anti-fat Bigotry,” and “Transphobia,” further confusing its purpose.

Rachel Lapal Cavallario, spokeswoman for Kendi’s center, told the Boston Globe Wednesday that BU had “received some complaints from individuals questioning whether the center was following its funding guidelines. We are currently looking into those complaints.”

However, the center rejects the “characterization of it not having produced important work insofar as antiracism is concerned,” she said.

To raise Grundy’s question again, where did the money go? Echoing that sentiment, BU has launched an “inquiry” into the center amid the scandal, the Daily Free Press said.

The situation is reminiscent of the lawsuits against Black Lives Matter, another embattled racial justice organization. In 2023, Black Lives Matter reported a $9 million deficit for 2022 after raising $90 million in 2020. Only 33% of that massive sum went to charitable activism, federal filings showed, as a significant chunk was squandered on the leaders’ mansions, personal expenses, and favors for friends. Both Kendi’s center and BLM followed a similar model: drum up rumors of racism, prescribe DEI, create an apparatus, lure in donors, get paid.

The racial grievance business welcomes little accountability — or accounting, for that matter — which explains why it’s found a home in academia. Many colleges, such as Boston University, or my alma mater Boston College down the road, charge their students exorbitant tuition for useless degrees and boatloads of debt. Tenured professors collect big paychecks while hawking critical race theory, turning students into activists instead of real scholars.

Despite its self-destructive tendencies, the DEI racket continues to spread throughout academia. Some colleges are trying to meet demand for so-called DEI experts by creating a corresponding major, USA Today claimed. At least six colleges across the country offer DEI degree programs or will in the future, according to the publication’s analysis. Tufts University and the University of Pennsylvania even have DEI graduate programs.

Some universities have also woven DEI into their academic missions. Duke University in 2020 launched a Racial Equity Advisory Council, composed of four subcommittees including faculty members and students, which will propose “measures to assess and foster racial equity” to the university’s leadership. Every year since fall 2020, the Duke Endowment has sponsored professors with seed grants to pursue research proposals related to race as part of the school’s anti-racism mission. That’s more money down the drain.

DEI in America’s prestigious colleges contributes nothing, wastes money, and fuels a bubble of empty courses, professions, and promises. But if the shakeout at Kendi’s BU center is any clue, it might be starting to pop.

[amberfaber40]

Lvmh acquisisce la Off-White di Virgil Abloh e Etro | iO Donna

Lvmh acquisisce la Off-White di Virgil Abloh e Etro | iO Donna

Acquisti che scuotono il segmento dei gruppi del lusso, già in pieno fermento

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For his final show after 50 years, Jean Paul Gaultier pulled out all the stops, with a little help from Karlie Kloss, Gigi and Bella Hadid, and more.

Chanel Spring 1999 Couture Collection

Chanel Spring 1999 Couture collection, runway looks, beauty, models, and reviews.

Hoyeon Jung Opens the Louis Vuitton FW22 Show

The 'Squid Game' star dominated the runway during Paris Fashion Week.

Alexander McQueen Spring 1998 Ready-to-Wear Fashion Show

An Ode To '90s Chanel - Bleu

The ever-changing world of fashion has had its fair share of impactful moments. From Audrey Hepburn in “Breakfast at Tiffany’s,” Lady Gaga’s “PETA-gate” meat dress, and Carrie Bradshaw in “Sex and the City,” inspiration has never been in short supply, but few instances have encompassed an era. Most importantly, an entire era leaving such a …

Gigi Hadid flaunts her endless pins in a slinky gown during PFW

The model, 24, showcased her endless pins in a slinky gown as she walked the runway for the Jacquemus Menswear Fall/Winter 2020-2021 show in Paris, France on Saturday.

Mugler Spring 1998 Couture Collection

Mugler Spring 1998 Couture collection, runway looks, beauty, models, and reviews.

The Blog — Rachel Ran Noh

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All the Best Runway Looks from Milan Fashion Week Spring 2020

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Dua Lipa and Gigi Hadid Just Walked Versace

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Dolce & Gabbana Spring 2023 Ready-to-Wear collection, runway looks, beauty, models, and reviews.

Tempo di shopping per Lvmh. Dopo l’annuncio del ritorno dell’ex Celine Phoebe Philo con il suo brand, che avrà proprio una partecipazione nel gruppo di Bernard Arnault, il colosso del lusso torna sotto i riflettori per le sue ultime acquisizioni. A partire da Off-White, il marchio di Virgil Abloh, l’eccentrico stilista alla guida della collezione uomo di Louis Vuitton. Ma anche di Etro, il brand italiano ora nell’orbita del fondo L Catterton, partecipato dal magnate francese.Leggi anche› L’eredità e il ritorno di Phoebe PhiloL’acquisizione di Off-WhiteOff-White, che ha presentato la collezione autunno inverno 2021/2022 Laboratory of Fun il 4 luglio con una sfilata-concerto aperta da Bella Hadid in mini abito di velluto blu elettrico, oggi finisce nella galassia del gruppo d’Oltralpe. Una cessione di maggioranza, al 60%, della Off-White LLC, la società proprietaria del marchio omonimo fondato nel 2013 e diretto da Virgil Abloh, guida artistica della collezione uomo di Louis Vuitton dal 2018 – nonché lo stilista più seguito del momento. L’operazione, soggetta alle approvazioni di legge, dovrebbe essere completata in 60 giorni. Bella Hadid alla sfilata Off-White AI21/22.Leggi anche› Virgil Abloh è il nuovo direttore creativo della linea maschile di Louis VuittonUn’intesa promettente per ambo le parti: la partnership infatti prevede di sfruttare le competenze del designer al fine di collaborare con altre realtà di Lvmh, anche al di fuori dell’ambito moda. «Per quasi un decennio, abbiamo costruito Off-White come marchio generazionale, in grado di sfidare lo status quo. Ora potrà evolvere grazie alla potenza di Lvmh» ha dichiarato Abloh. «Non vediamo l’ora di supportare il team nel guidare la crescita di Off-White e di lavorare insieme per portare la sensibilità unica di Virgil a una gamma più ampia di categorie di lusso» ha detto invece Arnault. Una decisione storica, considerato che Abloh si appresta così a diventare il primo uomo di colore nelle fila di un grande conglomerato luxury. Leggi anche› Com’è andata la Paris Fashion Week maschile primavera estate 2022L’investimento in EtroLvmh, che controlla quasi un sesto del lusso mondiale e ha in portafoglio marchi che vanno da Bulgari a Dior a Fendi, continua quindi la sua strategia di ampliamento del portfolio. É notizia recentissima l’acquisizione, attraverso il fondo L Catterton Europe, della casa di moda italiana Etro. La società di private equity globale, partecipata dalla Financière Agache di Arnault, prenderà una partecipazione di maggioranza al 60% nella Maison, lasciando il restante 40% alla famiglia Etro.Una finalizzazione delle trattative iniziate nella primavera 2021: «dopo quasi 55 anni alla guida del marchio, crediamo che la collaborazione con L Catterton avvierà una nuova fase di crescita e di consolidamento del ruolo di Etro tra i fashion brands più longevi e prestigiosi» ha dichiarato il fondatore, Gerolamo “Gimmo” Etro (che assumerà l’incarico di presidente della società).Operazione “svecchiamento” per il lussoConsiderato anche l’ultimo acquisto in termini di tempo di L Catterton, il marchio di sandali Birkenstock, la strategia di Lvmh è chiara: puntare sui brand più innovativi amati dai giovani da un lato, investire sul prestigio tramite l’acquisizione di marchi classici, come Etro, dall’altro. Lo scopo? Svecchiare il mondo del lusso e renderlo più appetibile che mai, soprattutto per le nuove generazioni.Leggi anche› Il gruppo LVMH ha comprato Tiffany & CoUn’operazione già in atto, confermata anche dagli ultimi movimenti in atto negli altri grandi gruppi del lusso: la quotazione in Borsa di Ermenegildo Zegna, ad esempio. L’operazione avverrà attraverso la fusione con la spac Investindustrial acquisition Corp, una società-veicolo varata a fine 2020 per portare aziende italiane negli Usa. Zegna avrà un valore iniziale atteso di 3,2 miliardi di dollari, con una capitalizzazione di mercato prevista di 2,5 miliardi: ovvero, tanti soldi da investire in nuovi progetti.Ricevi news e aggiornamenti sulle ultime tendenze beauty direttamente nella tua postaIscriviti alla newsletterLeggi anche› Buon compleanno Re Giorgio. La sua carriera in 20 look memorabiliContinua inoltre a fare notizia il piano di John Elkann per costruire un potenziale conglomerato di lusso attorno a Ferrari, a partire dall’investimento in Giorgio Armani. Secondo rumors il rampollo della famiglia Agnelli si sarebbe offerto di acquisire una quota di minoranza nella casa di moda, anche se la proposta di alleanza per ora sarebbe stata respinta da re Giorgio, saldo alla guida e forte dei suoi appena compiuti 87 anni.iO Donna ©RIPRODUZIONE RISERVATA

[strongerpotions]

Hi! I saw your post about Timothée's photoshoots and I'm curious on which one are your favorites, he does have some awesome photoshoots.

oh, there are so many great ones, but my favorite right now is the new oct 2022 one from vogue uk in black and white. i really want a copy of that one!!

my other favorites are probably the nov 2020 one for gq, the oct-nov 2021 one for time, mar-apr 2020 one for dazed china, and nov 2019 one with saoirse for entertainment weekly. oh, and the fall/winter 2020 one for document journal! i'm really eyeing the gq one because i loveee outdoor photoshoots. i like off-beat styling and bold colors, too, so i was really pleased when i first started looking at the shoots he's done.

his shoot with saoirse was one of the first i saw, and it has such a soft and balanced color palette, and the styling is so gorgeous, so i had to buy a copy lol

i'm still pretty new to timothée's work, so i'm still not aware of every shoot/interview. which ones are your favorites?

[dmchatsworthproject]

Diversity of Genders

What is Gender Diversity?

Gender diversity is an umbrella term that is used to describe gender identities that demonstrate a diversity of expression beyond the binary framework. Having to choose to express yourself as male or female is constraining. Some people would prefer to have the freedom to change from one gender to another, or not have a gender identity at all. Others just want to be able to openly defy or challenge more normalized concepts of gender.

Their identity is about presenting something more outwardly authentic to the world, whether they understand themselves to be differently gendered, or have no gender at all. It is important to recognize that many cultures throughout history have recognized gender diversity beyond masculine and feminine.

It is important to feel comfortable with what you look like and what outfit to wear that also represents your style. Representing the LGBTQ+ is a big thing that is still rising to this day to show the diversity through Gender and be proud for who they are.

www.youtube.com. (n.d.). Marco Marco Collection 2 FULL Runway Show. [online] Available at: https://youtu.be/C0eoePhFNIw [Accessed 22 Aug. 2023].

www.youtube.com. (n.d.). Geena Rocero - Unapologetic: A Filipina American Standing Up for Gender Equality. [online] Available at: https://youtu.be/iwOKbFY2Mz4 [Accessed 22 Aug. 2023].

Dugal, J. (2021). The Rise Of Gender Inclusive Fashion. [online] fashion abc. Available at: https://www.fashionabc.org/the-rise-of-gender-inclusive-fashion/.

Milan Fashion Week- Gucci

Gender fluidity is not just Harry Styles in a feather boa. It can also be a woman in an elegantly oversized double-breasted trouser suit, like the model who opened Gucci’s first Milan fashion week show in two years.

This collection celebrated the quieter beauty of women in menswear, rather the rule-breaking energy of men in dresses. Most of the 84 models, whatever gender, wore trouser suits.

Gucci, best known recently for putting men in feminine clothes, dressed women in masculine clothes in a menswear-based collection shown during womenswear fashion week on models of all genders. Surprising an audience with a tradition-disrupting gender-fluid look is as on-brand for modern Gucci as supermodels in cocaine-white dresses slashed at the hipbone sashaying down a mirrored runway were in a previous era of glory days, under Tom Ford.

the Guardian. (2022). A quieter gender fluidity marks Gucci’s return to the Milan runway. [online] Available at: https://www.theguardian.com/fashion/2022/feb/25/a-quieter-gender-fluidity-marks-guccis-return-to-the-milan-runway.

Los Angeles Fashion- Versace

Donatella Versace’s bag isn’t necessarily creating pieces that can be worn by both men and women, it seems it was more Gianni’s style, but her latest Fall/Winter 2020 Runway collection at Milan Fashion Week was just that, gender-fluid, and gender-accepting. With funky floral suits and sweaters worn by both the male and female models, neon-pink electric suits, striped & mixed animal-skin jackets and of course the It Girls of the fashion industry (e.g. Kendall, Gigi, Kaia and Bella), it was quite the show this season. Coming off the amazing performance-and Versace outfits JLO wore for her SuperBowl performance, this collection was possibly outside of Donatella’s previous expertise, but a welcome change to Versace’s brand.

Callaway, R. (2020). Versace’s Gender-Fluid Runway at MFW. [online] Los Angeles Fashion - LA Fashion Magazine. Available at: https://thelafashion.com/2020/02/22/versaces-gender-fluid-runway-mfw/ [Accessed 9 Oct. 2023].

Celine & Saint Laurent- Fashion catwalk spring/summer 2019.

"Sexiness" on the runways doesn't reflect the way the world is evolving, and the industry needs to reconsider how it's conceiving and selling perceptions of women back to them.

Cathy Horyn in her joint review of the Maison Margiela and Saint Laurent collections at the recently-concluded Paris Fashion Week. Designers are not just arbiters of skirt lengths and bell sleeves; the most prominent ones can, through their clothing, encapsulate and influence female selfhood. Fashion can be approached as a delightful diversion, but it does not exist separately from the realities of what is going on in the world — and a lot going on in the world right now is unimaginably grim.

Over the course of this past Fashion Month, the runways unveiling the spring/summer 2019 collections featured some stereotypically "sexy" clothes — mini shorts, teetering heels, skin-baring pieces. Given the continuing conversations around misogyny, consent, and gender equality, contemporary identity is shifting — and so is the attire that goes with it.

Moroz, S. (n.d.). Why Are Designers Still Telling Women To Dress ‘Sexy?’ [online] www.refinery29.com. Available at: https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/2018/10/213154/fashion-month-2018-runway-misogyny-sex-me-too-controversy [Accessed 9 Oct. 2023].

[kimludcom]

Off-White | Fall Winter 2020/2021 | Full Show

[thefashionjunkie]

[myloversthesunrise]

dresses that nesta archeron would wear

i've always imagined nesta to prefer something elegant and a bit more conservative (but nothing motherly or elderly), less sparkly and not showing a lot of skin, but loves off-shoulder dresses to show off her collarbones and assets. maybe a bit of cleavage here and there or a long slit running up her leg once in a while with minimum jewelry. a classy and elegant look, fit for a lady. i also headcanon her to prefer something dark or rich in colors, but wouldn't mind wearing pastel or white if the occasion calls for it.

1. GEORGES HOBEIKA Couture Fall Winter 2018 Paris | 2. SAIID KOBEISY Fall/Winter 2018 Couture | 3. ZUHAIR MURAD Fall 2021 Couture | 4. TARIK EDIZ - 9610 Strapless A-Line Gown with Detachable Cape Train | 5. ALEX PERRY Fall Winter 2020 | 6. ZUHAIR MURAD Off-The-Shoulder Metallic Silk-Blend Plissé Gown | 7. PAOLO SEBASTIAN The Sleeping Garden (2015) | 8. GEORGES CHAKRA Spring Couture 2019 | 9. RALPH & RUSSO AW 2015/2016 Collection | 10. PAOLO SEBASTIAN Spring/Summer 2019

[itskateak]

Mint Ice Cream & Bubblegum Kisses - Chapter Twelve

Chapter Summary: Mistletoe is a nuisance in general, but Y/N is positive his mischievous daughter and Peter Parker have something to do with the fact that there's always a sprig near him and a certain super-soldier.

Word Count: 7.6K (Longest of the story so far)

Warnings: Minor language, Gay Pining

A/N: This was...supposed to come out near Christmas of 2020. That obviously didn't happen, since it's now NOVEMBER of 2021. Oh well. I had to text my dad halfway through writing this to ask for his recipe of chicken tikka masala just so I could write that later scene right. I don't have the heart to tell him it was for fanfiction and not because I was going to cook it. Enjoy :)

Taglist is open! PM me, send an ask, or @ me on a chapter to let me know you’d like to be tagged! Strikethrough means I couldn’t tag you, but I will send you a message with a link to the new chapter when I update. :)

Masterlist

✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿

A couple of months had passed since the First Mission Incident. Bucky had fully healed with no lasting damage. Things had gone back to normal and new missions had gone off without a hitch since Y/N had moved his procedures and programs around. Once he'd gotten used to the new systems and operations, everything was perfectly seamless.

Seasons shifted over time. Leaves turned shades of sunset before tumbling towards the ground. The trees stood bare for a moment, sending lines across the sky. Flowers wilted and the grass died. Not long after, snow began to fall and covered the ground in white. It hid everything in a quiet, glittering blanket.

Footprints were traced in a circle from the trainees during their daily sessions. The timed mile deepens the path with each lap. Snow was melted in areas due to helicrafts landing and taking off. Days seemed shorted from lack of sun, and temperatures were dropping with each coming night.

It was complete and utter bullshit, in Y/N's opinion.

Angelica's school was on winter break, which meant she was running rampant around the compound every hour of the day. No one was getting a break from that, not that they wanted to. Peter was also spending most of his time at the compound and his aunt was planning to join during the week of Christmas, but she still had to work until then.

Music played softly in the background as the team began unpacking decoration boxes. They were split into small groups around the common room, pulling out ornaments and lights. Tony was adamant that everyone was present to decorate, which is why they'd waited until only three weeks before Christmas to do so. Most of the team had been away on a mission and had just recently come back. Except for Sam, who was visiting family in Louisiana for an early Christmas.

The second everyone was recovered, which was the day after, Tony was waking them up as early as allowed (threats were made and he's not an idiot to mess with ex-assassins) and throwing them into decorating mode. He even went so far as to assign their small teams to maximize their productivity. He didn't want this to drag on for more than one day. If everyone buckled down at the same time and really put their all into it, they'd be done and not have to worry about it.

Although Tony had some trauma around the winter holiday seasons, he held back nothing when celebrating Christmas. The majority of the team celebrated Christmas, but he definitely made sure to decorate as vaguely as possible to include everyone. And he always made sure to set up areas for other people to celebrate their holidays if they wanted it. All they had to do was ask and Tony would do it.

Y/N opened the red and green tote, finding himself staring directly into a pool of sparkly garland. It was decently organized on spools, but there was so much that it just looked like there was no distinction. He looked up as Tony began yelling instructions to Peter, who was climbing the wall to help set up the tree. DUM-E was also assisting, holding the base of it steady.

The tree itself was massive, standing nearly to the top of the twelve-foot high ceiling. There was just enough room for a fairly elaborate tree-topper. Peter steadied the tree, making sure it was stable before slowly moving his hands away. He fluffed the fake branches (Bruce's seasonal allergies acted up around pine trees) to make it look nice and looked down at Tony to see how he did. After receiving a thumbs-up, he scrambled down the wall to help unpack some of the lights.

"I don't want a lot for Christmas. There is just one thing I need." Clint slid into the common room on his socks, almost losing his balance as he sang loudly. He stopped by Wanda and Vision, who were sifting through a carefully packed wooden chest. It was from her childhood. Old ornaments she was able to find in the rubble of her home. He ruffled Wanda's hair before sliding over to Natasha.

Nat shook her head fondly at her best friend and sang the backup vocals as she started to pull coils of lights from another red and green tote. She handed them off to Clint and he carefully set them on the ground. Once the tree was up to Tony's standards, they would start with the garland. They'd have to unravel the lights, though, for ease.

Steve set another set of four totes down and stretched his back out with a sigh. "That's everything. Here, Y/N. Let me help you get some of that garland out. Nat got it packed pretty tight last year."

"I understood what I needed to do, Rogers. We needed more room in another tote for the new ornaments and decorations." Natasha called.

"Yeah, yeah. Just focus on your lights." Steve kneeled down next to Y/N, smiling. It had taken them some time, but they'd finally realized they both had romantic feelings for each other. It never interfered with their work-life or on missions, but it was sweet to see them together.

"This one's pretty." Bucky's voice floated over the music and general chatter, drawing Y/N's attention for a moment. He was sitting cross-legged on the ground next to Angelica. One of their old cardboard boxes was in between them and they were sifting through it together, carefully pulling ornaments out. He was holding a figurine of a ballerina wearing a skirt made of petals.

"Papa bought this one when we went to the Nutcracker! I loved the spring fairy dancers and I thought she was really pretty." Angelica tapped the ballerina's foot so it would swing a little. "Have you ever seen the Nutcracker?"

"Yeah, but it's been a long time. My sister, Becca, loved it. We went when we could." Bucky watched the ornament, a distant smile turning his lips upwards. "It was always a special occasion. Everyone dressed up in their best. The girls and mom would wear makeup. Dad and I got to wear our nice dress shoes. The other ones were too small for me and hurt like hell after too long."

"I hate it when my shoes get too small. But that sounds like it was really fun." Angelica said softly. She reached across the box and took his free hand as if she knew there was something spiraling out of control in his mind.

"It was. It let us forget for a couple of hours...feel like things were normal again." His voice faded and his eyes glossed over for a moment before he took a deep breath and shook himself out of it. "Sorry. Got lost in thought there for a second."

"It's 'kay. You miss your family, don't you?" She asked, scooting closer to him. She took the ornament gently and laid it back in the box.

"Yeah, I do...if I didn't have everyone here, it would be a lot harder without them. You know, you kinda remind me of Becca." Bucky turned to her, breaking out of the fog entirely. "You've got her curiosity and stubbornness. And her dimples." He poked her cheek, causing her to smile and laugh.

"Got any pictures of her?" She asked, brushing her hair back. It was starting to fall into her face and it was becoming annoying. 

"Somewhere. I'll show you later when we're done decorating. Here, let me tie your hair back for you." He pulled her into his lap and swept her hair back. He used one of his hair ties to secure it, tugging it off his right wrist. He had learned to carry a couple extra wherever he went just in case. "There we go."

"Thanks." Angelica tilted her head back to look up at him and flashed him a smile. "Oh! Let me show you an ornament I made at school!"

Y/N chuckled and shook his head, trying to find the end of the garland he was holding. It was the first strand Tony wanted. The whole time he'd been helping Steve unload the tinsel, he'd been listening in on his daughter. 

"She's good for him, you know," Steve said, glancing up at Y/N. "He's always had a younger sibling around. He's been struggling with missing his sisters the last few holidays. It's like he's a whole new person now that Angelica's been around. Since the both of you have been around."

"She's like the first ray of sun after a storm. Always a breath of fresh air on the days you need it most." Y/N ducked his head to focus on the garland, hoping it hid the flustered expression that had taken over. "I'm glad she's able to help him heal. I'm sure it's not been easy for him without his family after everything he's been through. At least he still has you, and now the rest of the team."

"Yeah. And you two. It may not be perfect, but we're family here. And like it or not, you're a part of it." Steve smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkling up like they did when it was entirely genuine and natural.

"Alright, Y/N. Wanda. You're up. Let's get this garland hung!" Tony clapped his hands to gain their attention.

Together, with Wanda's powers, Peter's abilities, and Vision's flight, the tree was decorated in sparkling tinsel and twinkling lights. Pepper came in later to help direct the placement of ornaments in a balanced manner. She had an eye for design that Tony didn't, especially when it came to holiday decorations. They were the perfect team for this. She was better with details and aesthetics while he was good with the big picture and construction.

Bucky picked Angelica up and placed her on his shoulders, holding her steady so she could hang her ballerina on a higher branch. He stepped back and nodded in agreement with her placement. "Looks good, buttercup."

"Angelica, would you like to do the honors and place the star on the tree?" Tony asked, looking up at her. Her eyes lit up and she turned excitedly to her father.

"Why're you looking at me? I'm not gonna stop you." Y/N smiled and she nodded enthusiastically at Tony. He passed the star up to her. Vision floated up beside her and gently lifted her off of Bucky's shoulders.

He took her up to the top of the tree and watched as she placed the star. Carefully, he helped her secure it and plug it into the rest of the lights. She beamed at him, causing him to smile in return. Everyone had to agree that her smile was infectious and made everything brighter.

Bucky sunk his hands into his front pockets, standing next to Y/N as Vision brought Angelica back down to the ground. "Had some pretty ornaments in your box. She was telling me all about them."

"I heard some of the conversation. If you want, I'd be happy to get tickets to the Nutcracker and take you. Angelica has been dying to see it again and one of her friend's older sister is performing as the Sugar Plum Fairy this year." Y/N offered, looking up at the tree. They'd done a good job decorating. It was a beautiful conglomeration of everyone on the team, representing their history and their teamwork. 

"I'd...like that. I'd really like that." Bucky said with a smile. "Just let me know when and what to wear."

"Papa! I was so tall!" Angelica ran up to her father, beaming like a ray of light. He picked her up and placed her on his hip with a laugh.

"You were, honey. You were super tall. Did you thank Tony and Vision?"

"Thanks, Tony, for letting me put the star on the tree! And thanks Vision for helping me!" Angelica turned to look at them, wrapping her arms around her father's neck and leaning in close to him.

"No problem, squirt. It's tradition for newcomers to put up the topper. Wanda did it a couple of years ago. Bucky did it the year before last and Pete did it last year." Tony shrugged, sliding his arm around Pepper's waist.

"You're quite welcome, Angelica." Vision inclined his head with the tiniest smile.

"Alright. Moment of truth." Bruce kneeled down and checked the power strip, wanting to be certain all the plugs were secure. He plugged it into the outlet and stood. "Friday, can you turn the lights for the tree on?"

"Of course. Right away."

There was a moment of pause before the lights on the tree slowly flickered to life and grew brighter. Some twinkled, creating a sparkling effect. Others were colored and faded between brightness. It was beautiful and cheery. A perfect display for the holidays.

"Awesome work everyone. Let's take a lunch break and then we're gonna decorate the hallways." Tony announced, clapping his hands.

Everyone groaned.

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Y/N glanced up from his phone to check he wasn't going to bump into anyone as he walked down the hall toward the common room. He heard some hushed whispers but he didn't pay it any mind. Some people were still figuring out presents and such so it wasn't uncommon to hear random whispers from rooms. He got caught in the doorframe as he walked through at the same time as someone else.

"Oh, hey, Y/N." Bucky smiled and looked up. He rolled his eyes with a  sigh. "Dammit. Pete's stringing up mistletoe everywhere. I've been caught four times today."

"Oh, no." Y/N chuckled, shaking his head. He looked up, too. Sure enough, there was a sprig of mistletoe hanging from some string. "Well, we're not being watched so we can slide past each other without a problem."

"No, you can't!" Peter dropped from the ceiling with a grin. He even had his phone by his side, thumb hovering over what Y/N suspected was a record button. 

Bucky groaned and gave Y/N a sympathetic look. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to his temple. "See you around, yeah?"

"Yeah..." Y/N fought the warmth in his face, moving past him. He kept his eyes forward as he walked by Peter and towards his destination. This holiday season was going to be a trial of patience and avoidance. How many times could he miss getting caught in this exact situation? He hoped it was for the rest of the month.

"Dangit." Peter sighed and looked to Angelica, who was hiding behind one of the armchairs. "I thought we had them."

"Me, too. Maybe..." She furrowed her brows and focused on the floor. She was thinking, trying to come up with a plan that would work and get them the results they wanted.

"So, if we get them to actually kiss, we'd give up, right?" Peter asked, sliding his phone into his back pocket.

"Yeah." 

"So, we just need to wear them down until they give in, right?"

Angelica was quiet and Peter swore he could see the gears turning in her head. She lit up after a moment, a mischievous grin growing. I have an idea."

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"Hey, Y/N. Here's your drink. Steve and I were later on our run than we expected." Bucky knocked on the doorframe to Y/N's office, holding the usual cup that had become their morning tradition.

"Hey! Don't worry about it." Y/N smiled and beckoned him in. He took his empty paper cup and tossed it in the trashcan below his desk to make room for the new one. "Hope you don't mind I got something to get me going this morning."

"Actually, I do mind." Bucky narrowed his eyes playfully, unable to get rid of the amused glint in his eyes. "I feel betrayed. You've hurt me, Y/N. You've hurt me deeply."

"You're so dramatic." Y/N laughed, gratefully accepting the warm drink. He took a sip and hummed. "If it's any consolation, it tastes so much better than what I had."

"Consider yourself forgiven. Whatcha workin' on?" Bucky perched himself on the edge of Y/N's desk, one leg drawn up so he was turned sideways to look at him. 

"Checking messages and spending some time just watching the chatter. Nothing special. Tony told me I only have to work about ten hours this week so that's a couple hours a day." Y/N swiveled back and forth in his chair idly, chin propped up in his hand and elbow on the armrest. "What about you? Anything special going on today?"

"Not really. Just having some downtime. Sam's coming back today so I'm probably going to lock myself in my room for the next week." Bucky joked, flashing a crooked smile.

"Oh, don't act like you didn't miss him." 

"Okay, okay. He's not all that bad." Bucky admitted, raising his hands in surrender. "Where's the kid?"

Y/N burst into laughter as Bucky jumped, startled nearly out of his skin when a small hand grabbed his ankle. He fell into laughter as well, looking under the desk and waving at Angelica.

"You're lucky I didn't kick you, buttercup." He said, nudging her with his foot. "Could've given me a heart attack."

"Sorry, Bucky." Angelica giggled. "Uh, you guys should look up."

Y/N and Bucky looked up at the same time and had the exact same reaction. They sighed in mild frustration and strained amusement. Peter was grinning impishly back at them, a sprig of mistletoe pinched between his fingers.

"Really, Pete? Doorways were one thing. Now, you're just bein' ridiculous." Bucky raised a brow at the spiderling, narrowing his eyes like he was trying to figure out what the kid was doing.

"I do this to everyone. I've gotten Mr. Stark and Miss Potts three times today and Spider Mom and Cap twice." Peter said.

"Yeah, but they're actually couples, Pete." Y/N shook his head, feeling his face start to warm up again with a flush. His plan to avoid mistletoe was being foiled by a mischievous teenager. And by the giggle from under his desk, it seemed his daughter was in on it as well. Why wouldn't she be? It was exactly like her and had her signature all over it.

Bucky was chewing on his bottom lip, oddly quiet all of a sudden. His eyes were still narrowed at Peter and it almost seemed like they were having a telepathic conversation. He sighed in defeat and turned back to Y/N with that same sympathetic smile from their last encounter.

An alarm went off and it startled everyone in the office. Y/N turned to look at his computer. Shit. There was a sudden increase of chatter in a topic he'd flagged. He'd hoped that the bad guys would take the holiday season off, but his wishes had never really come entirely true.

"Well, I think that's all of our cues to leave." Bucky glanced up at Peter again and cussed under his breath. He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to Y/N's cheek. "Alright, Peter. Let's go and let him work."

Peter nodded and scrambled down the wall, tossing a goodbye over his shoulder. The moment he and Bucky had stepped foot out of the office, Peter broke into a dead sprint with Bucky chasing after him, a distant shout of his name followed by something in Russian.

Y/N scanned the chatter quickly, waiting to catch any information on the Winter Soldier. Nothing was popping up after the initial message, which he was realizing was from his contact. He sighed and leaned back in his chair, relieved. They were just asking how Bucky was after the failed mission.

"Everything okay, Papa?" Angelica asked quietly.

"Yeah, sweetheart. Everything's okay. Just a false alarm." Y/N closed down his programs after responding quickly to his contact. It was about time he did something else. His two hours for the day were done. "Angelica?"

"Yeah?"

"I know what you and Pete are up to." Y/N rolled back to look at her without ducking too far. "I don't know where you got the idea that there was something going on between Bucky and me, but you need to put it out of your heads. There's nothing there."

"If you say so." Angelica shrugged and turned back to her book. 

"I'm serious, kiddo. We're just friends and if you two keep pulling shit like that -"

"Papa!" She jerked her head back in surprise, eyes wide and brows raised.

"Sorry. Slipped out. What I'm trying to say is that you two could make things weird or awkward and I don't want that. He's just a friend." Y/N insisted, despite the feeling deep down in his chest. He was flat out lying to his daughter and it was making him nauseous. He never wanted to lie to her, but he also didn't want to make things uncomfortable between him and Bucky. If these feelings he had were ever going to go away, then this had to stop happening. 

"If you say so." Angelica shrugged again and went back to her book.

Y/N sighed in defeat and decided not to argue. He hoped that had been enough to convince her. It was more for his own sake than Bucky's. He could still feel Bucky's slightly chapped lips against his cheek. How warm they'd been despite just coming in from being outside in the cold. How he'd lingered just slightly despite the quick peck. He brushed his fingers lightly over his cheek with a tiny smile.

 As he went to shut down his computer, he missed the smug smirk his daughter was hiding behind her book.

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"Can you pass me the ginger, please?" Y/N asked, hand twisted behind him to receive the spice without taking his eyes off the pot in front of him. He had to be vigilant because he didn't want it to boil over or heat up too quickly and burn. That would be just his luck. All this time prepping for this meal and five seconds with his back turned could ruin it.

"Gimme just a second." Bucky slid into the small space between Y/N and the sink, rinsing his hands quickly and drying them off. The bottle of ginger was soon placed in Y/N's hand.

"Thanks. How's the chicken coming?" He tossed over his shoulder, measuring the ginger out carefully. He dumped it into the pot and set the bottle aside. He found the cumin in his disorganized and growing pile of spices.

"Good. Seems like it's almost done. And the sauce?" Bucky came up behind Y/N and leaned over to peek over his shoulder. The kitchen was already fairly warm, but as many people on the team had stated, Bucky and Steve put off heat like some kind of human space heater. The closeness only made it worse and Y/N fought to keep that warmth from reaching his face.

"Starting to look right. Most people say that it should look a light orange, but the recipe I've always used comes out as yellow. Doesn't taste any different." Y/N stirred the pot, head tilted slightly. It smelled like it was missing something. He took an extra spoon and did a quick taste test. He grabbed the turmeric and ginger, adding a proportional amount. Another test made him nod in satisfaction. "Want to try?"

"Sure." Bucky found one of the plastic spoons that had been used for measuring water and rested his left hand on Y/N's waist. He leaned forward slightly, reaching around to take a little of the sauce.

Y/N tried not to freeze up. He'd been so confident in the way he'd rested his hand there. The coolness of the metal helped combat the rising heat in the kitchen, which had nothing to do with the oven or the stove. He focused on his breathing and keeping it steady, praying Bucky didn't hear or - God forbid - feel the way his breath hitched the moment his hand came into contact with his hip. 

He'd simply die on the spot if Bucky could feel how his heart was racing frantically with where his chest pressed against his back. This had to be a test. Someone in the universe - probably, Loki - was messing with him intentionally and he was not a fan of it at all. His patience was being tested every second they were in this position and it was taking everything in him not to turn around and grab Bucky by the collar of his shirt and kiss him.

"Sam's gonna complain that it doesn't have enough kick. Might want to consider splitting this into two pots. One for those of us who like to not feel our lips by the end of the meal and one for the rest of you." Bucky backed away, tossing the spoon into the open trash can. He slid one of his hair ties off his wrist and held it between his teeth while he gathered his hair up into a loose bun. "Otherwise, it's really good. I like it."

"I'm glad. You gonna help me split this, then?" Y/N took a calming breath, keeping his back to Bucky for a couple of moments longer to compose himself entirely.

"Yeah. Let me wash my hands again since I just touched my hair. I'll grab another pot, too." Bucky said, moving around Y/N as he left the sauce to simmer while he grabbed some other spices.

Y/N opened the cabinet and glanced over the many bottles, trying to find the seasoning Sam had made one night for their homemade tacos. It was in a mason jar with a handwritten label. He grabbed it and turned quickly as the cabinet door closed. He stopped in his tracks as he caught sight of something near the ceiling and sighed.

"Bucky."

"Yeah, sugar?" Bucky straightened up with another pot in his hand.

Y/N ignored the nickname for now and pointed up. There was a team of fire ants forming a chain, their foreman holding a string with a piece of mistletoe. As a test, he took a step away from Bucky, and the ants adjusted to be centered between them again.

"What I'm understanding here is that the ants are just going to follow us until we just do what they want us to," Y/N said, giving a defeated smile to Bucky. The ants weren't going to go away, and that was going to interfere with their cooking. Unless they just got it over with and sent the ants on their way.  

"Peter's still recruiting people, huh?"

"Seems like it." He walked over to Bucky and leaned up, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek. The ants seemed satisfied with that and crept backward, taking the infernal branch with them. "Let's get this sauce split."

Bucky chuckled and set the pot down next to the other one, turning the burner off. He held his steady as Y/N carefully poured a rough estimate of a third of the contents.

"We've got nuisances for teammates," Bucky said, leaning his hip against the counter.

"Oh, we definitely do. Have they always been this way?" Y/N asked, glancing at Bucky out of the corner of his eye. 

"Sort of. They've never been this bad towards me. I think they realized that all my threats were empty." Bucky shot him a crooked grin. "We should get them back somehow."

"No, no. I'm not in this revenge business." Y/N shook his head, laughing slightly. "I'm not getting into that war with everyone. Bad enough I'm in a prank war with my own kid."

"Fair enough. Hopefully, they'll give up soon."  Bucky stepped back to give Y/N some more space to work. He left to check on the chicken in the oven, pulling it out since he deemed it was done.

"Do you want to add the spice to this since you're one of the people who like to burn their taste buds off with spice?" Y/N asked, holding up Sam's Seasoning.

"Sure. You can take over the chicken and split it evenly between both pots." Bucky switched places with Y/N, taking the seasoning bottle as he did. "This smells amazing. You're a great cook, Y/N."

"I followed a recipe. It's not that impressive." Y/N protested.

"Don't start this again." Bucky shot over his shoulder. "Accept the compliment or else."

"Or else what?" Y/N taunted, glad that the atmosphere had returned to the relaxed environment it had been before.

"I...will admit that I didn't think that far."

Scott, Peter, and Angelica could hear Y/N's laughter from down the hall. They grinned. Mission: Reverse Roles Accomplished.

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The common room was packed full of the team and their families. Kids were darting between adults, careful of their paths to avoid being stepped on. Everyone was in festive clothing, whether it was an ugly sweater or a Santa hat. Couples were paired together, arms linked or lovers held close. 

The tree was lit up, dazzling the room with its beauty. It looked just as stunning as it did when it was first decorated. Some would argue it looked more so now that the bottom was accompanied by a multitude of brightly wrapped presents. Music played softly in the background, even-paced and smooth. Chatter floated above it and the crackling of the fireplace. Laughter bounced around the room, the holiday cheer infectious and alive.

In true fashion, mistletoe was hung from most doorways entering the common room. Couples were consistently caught under it, in which people called them out and the tradition had to be fulfilled. Steve and Angelica had tried to pass each other in one of those doorways. He kneeled down and took her hand, pressing a kiss to her knuckles. She returned the gesture by kissing his cheek, making everyone's hearts melt.

Angelica had her hair done nicely and was even allowed to wear some minimal makeup by her father. Wanda and Natasha had helped her apply it in the right way. She was wearing a beautiful red dress that swayed around her when she moved. She matched with Peter, who had the same color tie. They were adorable together. The two had become fast and unshakeable friends in the few months they'd known each other. Angelica's father couldn't have been more relieved to know she had someone like Peter looking out for her.

"Someone's going to have a hell of a time taking her out in the future," Natasha said as she came up to Y/N's side, a glass of champagne perched in her hand. "Pete's the first line of defense. But then whoever it is has to deal with the rest of us. And then you."

"Yeah...I don't want to think about that, yet. She's still my little girl. I've got a few more years." Y/N smiled, sinking his hands into his pockets. "I think she and Cassie would get along, too. Hopefully, we get to meet her soon."

"She's a sweetheart. Has a very similar personality as your little monster. The chaos those two would get up to...and adding Peter into the mix. Good luck." Natasha's eyes lit up like they always did when she was talking about kids. He hoped she'd get to have one of her own one day. There were many options for her to do so when she was ready. 

"At least they aren't like us. Imagine if they were trained like us." Yelena slung her arm over Natasha's shoulders with a smile. "Untamable. You'd never stand a chance."

"Very true. Y/N, this is my sister, Yelena. Not by blood." Natasha shrugged Yelena's arm off.

"But blood doesn't make family." Yelena extended her hand with a small smile. "Nice to meet you."

"You, too. I've heard some great stories about you two and your adventure to take down the Red Room a few years ago. The underground is still talking about it. Are you still in contact with the other Widows?" He asked. It was an honor to meet Yelena after Natasha had talked so much about her. Though Melina and Alexei were unable to attend, it was nice to meet someone else that Nat considered family. Someone outside of the team.

"Not so much. They've been doing their own thing. Figuring out their new life and freedoms." Natasha took a sip of her drink. "I hear from them occasionally."

"Me, too." Yelena looked around the room, brow furrowed. "Didn't you say the Winter Soldier was going to be here? I haven't seen him."

"He's hiding in the corner over there." Y/N hitched his chin to a less crowded area. "How...do you know him?"

"He trained some of us in the Red Room. He doesn't entirely remember it, but if I talk about it for a little bit, he starts to get memories back." Natasha explained casually as if she was saying they had gone to the same school or gym in the past.

"I met him once. Singular training day. Then he was called on assignment and we heard nothing about him after that." Yelena said, still staring at Bucky in the corner. "What's his actual name? Tasha never told me."

"I did tell you!" Nat interjected and Yelena stuck her tongue out at her.

"James Buchanan Barnes. He prefers Bucky, though." Y/N bit back a smile. It was nice to see their relationship was still so sibling-like. Nat had talked about their history and what happened to cause them to be initially put together in a fake family then later separated.

"Tasha, you'll introduce me later, yeah?" Yelena turned to Nat with an expectant look. 

"Yeah, yeah. Go annoy someone else." Nat shoved her lightly.

"Oh! Your boyfriend is free. I have some embarrassing stories to tell." Yelena said, already quickly walking away. "Nice to meet you, Y/N!"

"Yelena, Не смей!" Natasha called after her, speeding to catch up and stop her sister. She continued to talk in Russian, assumedly threatening her with pain of death. People moved out of her way, amused. Even with her quick and sharp movements, she never spilled a drop of her champagne.

Y/N shook his head with a smile and decided it was time to go see what the ex-Winter Soldier was up to. He'd been hiding in that corner for a little while now. Probably because there were so many people and he needed a minute to recharge. He navigated through the crowd, smiling at people when they waved at him or greeted him briefly.

Clint's voice rose over the crowd as he called out a pair of unfortunate people who got caught in a doorway with mistletoe. People laughed and turned to watch. That was the thing Y/N was worried about most at the current moment. If he got caught with Bucky somewhere, they'd be watched to make sure they followed the rules.

"Hey, stranger," Y/N said, gaining Bucky's attention as he approached.

"Hey, yourself." Bucky broke into a smile and pushed off the wall. He uncrossed his arms as well and seemed to relax more. "Enjoying the party?"

"Yeah. Though, it's a lot of people. Don't blame you for finding this corner to escape for a moment." He replied, sympathizing with his social anxiety. There was a lot happening in the room at the same time and it could get very overwhelming, especially when there were multiple loud personalities occupying the space as well. Tony and Sam could clash in the right situations.

"Care to join me by the window? It should be a little cooler there and the sound will get trapped at the front of the loft." Bucky gestured with his head for Y/N to follow and they headed to the window. Snow was starting to fall outside, truly making the party like a scene from a movie. All it needed was the in denial couple to be caught under the mistletoe.

Which is exactly what Y/N realized happened when Tony called for them to stop right where they were. He froze and looked up, internally screaming at the sight of that damned sprig. Of course. The one time in the evening he was close enough to Bucky to get caught in this situation, there had to be a hidden piece of mistletoe to make his life miserable.

Bucky glared at Tony sharply, lips pressed in a thin line. He seemed as fed up as Y/N did with this whole situation. With a sigh, he ran his hand through his hair and turned to Y/N. "C'mere, then." 

Y/N stepped closer, unsure of what was happening. His anxiety faded as Bucky leaned down and pressed a kiss to his cheek, just like they'd been doing the rest of the week whenever they found themselves suddenly and "inexplicably" caught in this position.

"Ah! That doesn't follow Mistletoe Etiquette. It doesn't count unless it's a proper kiss. Lips on lips. Them's the rules." Tony called them out, pointing as he sipped his drink with raised brows.

"What if we were related? That's not exactly right." Bucky argued.

"Relatives have an exception. A kiss on the cheek is allowed. But you're not related, so the rules state it has to be on the lips." Tony insisted, trying to hide his smirk. 

"That's not a thing." Bucky continued to protest. "That's never been a thing."

"Okay. Let's take a vote. All in favor of deeming a kiss on the cheek valid in the eyes of Mistletoe Tradition, raise your hand and say: Aye." Tony turned towards the crowd. Bruce, Yelena, and Vision were the only ones to raise their hands. "All opposed?"

Everyone else raised their hands, calling nay in unison. Tony smugly turned on his heel with an expectant and shit-eating grin. He didn't even have to say anything for the gloating to be felt. But, the room had decided. The vote had been done.

"You didn't follow Robert's Rules of Order in taking a vote. That's not a valid vote." Y/N tried to worm their way out of it a different way. If he could catch Tony on a technicality, maybe Bucky could sneak away to hide until it blew over. 

"Y/N, do you think those rules apply here? I mean, look who you're talkin' to here." Tony gestured to himself, his egotistic streak spiking with this moment to flex his power.

"You guys should just get it over with at this point. You're just making it worse by drawing it out." Natasha stepped forward, gaze narrowing on Bucky. He must've tried to say something but her brow raised as if daring him to continue. He sighed and turned back to Y/N.

"I don't want you to feel like you're being forced to do this right now. Are you okay with doing this?" Bucky muttered, seemingly blocking out everything else in the room. His eyes were only focused on him and him alone.

"They won't leave us alone or let us live it down. Who knows if they'll stop just because we do this." Y/N pointed out, frustrated. They were damned if they did and damned if they didn't. The team would harass them about it if they chickened out but he was afraid they wouldn't leave them alone regardless.

"If we followed Stark's rules and I kissed him on the lips right now, this will stop. Peter will stop climbing walls. All mistletoe comes down after tonight. If we're caught under the mistletoe again tonight, we've paid our dues and don't have to go through this again. Do we have a deal?" Bucky turned and looked at the crowd, but turned his scrutiny on Peter, Angelica, and Scott for a moment when he mentioned Peter's shenanigans. 

"Deal." Tony nodded, satisfied with the answer and the compromise.

"When you're ready, tell me." Bucky looked back at Y/N.

Y/N could feel his heart pounding against his chest. It had nearly taken his hearing by now with how loud it was. Blood was rushing to his face, making it warm. This wasn't going to be good for the feelings he was trying desperately to quell. This would only make them worse. Hell, this whole week had made it ten times worse. He took a steadying breath, aware of everyone's eyes on them.

"I'm right here. Just focus on me, alright? Don't worry about them." Bucky gently grabbed his shoulders, thumb running over his collarbone in comfort. "Ready?"

Y/N closed his eyes and focused on blocking out everything around them. When he opened them again, it was like all he could see was Bucky. No one else existed in the room. It had gone quiet. The music was muffled. It was just him and Bucky. He nodded.

Bucky leaned down and tilted his head just slightly to make things easier for the both of them. He was tentative at first, gentle and patient. His lips were warm, like the rest of his body consistently was, and there was a lingering taste of apple cider. He pressed a little closer to satisfy the crowd.

Y/N felt like his knees were going to give out. His heart was racing and the light feeling in his stomach became intense. He didn't know what to do with his hands, so he kept them at his sides. It was over faster than he expected - and hoped - but it was understandable because of the audience. He opened his eyes and found Bucky giving him a shy smile, eyes asking if he was alright. He nodded.

"Deal has been fulfilled! You two are now immune to the Mistletoe and it will be taken down once the party is over." Tony called and the party returned to its normal chaos. 

The music and chatter came rushing back immediately like a trance had been broken. Y/N blinked and realized they were still standing a little too close. He took a step back and returned Bucky's smile. His heart was still racing and he was beginning to feel light-headed.

"You okay?" Bucky asked, head tilted in concern.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm okay. Not really a fan of being the center of attention." Y/N half-lied. He looked at the crowd and shook his head in mild amusement. 

"I could use a drink, now. Wanna come?" Bucky lazily pointed over his shoulder with his thumb and that damned crooked smile.

"Maybe...in a little bit. I'm gonna get some air, first." Y/N felt like he was burning up with a bad fever. The heat of the room combined with how flushed he was after kissing Bucky, he really needed to cool down. Both in temperature and his mind. 

"Alright." Bucky gave him a flash of his full smile while stepping back before he turned and disappeared into the crowd. Y/N quickly found the closest exit to the outside to make his escape.

Peter, Sam, Scott, and Angelica all fist-bumped together. Their plan had gone off well, thanks to Tony and his annoying insistence on rules that didn't even exist. It was like he knew what they had been planning. Either way, they all hoped it was the push those two needed to finally admit their feelings.

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Y/N collapsed on his bed, staring at the ceiling. What a night. That whole evening didn't go at all how he expected. He couldn't say he wasn't pleasantly surprised, but he could say it wasn't under the terms he'd wished it was. He took as deep a breath as he could and slowly blew it out, groaning at the end.

His phone buzzed in his pocket and he rolled slightly to be able to pull it out to look at it. Bucky's name was lit up on his screen, a message waiting to be read.

Bucky: Hey, I just wanted to check in after what happened. If it made you uncomfortable at all, I apologize for that. And if you want to, we can forget it ever happened. Tony can be relentless at times, but I'm sure you know that by now.

Y/N: Don't worry about it! I didn't mind. It was just a little nerve-wracking because everyone was staring. It was just holiday fun and Tony was probably put up to it by my mischievous little brat.

Bucky: Sam's in on it, too. Peter and Angelica aren't alone in it. And Scott was recruited in the last couple days. 

Y/N rolled his eyes. Of course, Sam was teaming up with his kid and Peter. And Scott was always down to cause mischief. They were lucky Thor and Loki weren't around to make it all the worse.

Bucky: By the way, what brand is your chapstick? It was nice. I liked the flavor.

Y/N's eyes widened and he almost dropped his phone in shock. He thought Bucky would've only kissed him as lightly as possible just to get it over with. But if he tasted his chapstick...he lingered far longer and got much closer than he had realized.

Y/N: I don't remember :( I'll take a picture of it when I find it again. I misplaced it. It happens all the time.

Bucky: Oh, no! Whenever you find it. No rush. Happy holidays, Y/N. Gnight.

Y/N: Happy holidays, Bucky. Gnight :)

Bucky plugged his phone in and got comfortable in bed. He rubbed his lips together for what felt like the hundredth time that evening. He could still feel Y/N's lips against his. The control he'd had at that moment to back away was a godsend. If he had stood there just a moment longer, he would've taken Y/N's face into his hands and kissed him until neither of them could breathe. Then only give them enough time to just barely catch their breath before pulling him back in to confess everything he was holding onto by mere faith. Another moment and he would've laid his heart bare in front of everyone.

Patience was a virtue he'd earned and one he'd exercised for decades. Compared to that, what was another month?

✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿

Taglist-

@supernaturalwintersoldier @shadowolf993 @booty-ass-hoe @fightmemacbeth @myybebe @pastel-boy-sungjae @unsure-username @raspberryyuuki @urs216 @misfortunatem00n @moonbintang @skylions-den @blurredx18​ @elliot-damon-2006 

[jedidragonwarriorqueen]

2021 Year In Review

(stealing this format from a review I did for last year. It was a tag game I think but I’m too lazy to start that up. I say after writing all this out, haha.)

Top Five Films you watched in 2021:

Your Name, 2016 (the animation! The music! The angst! Ahhhhhhhh)

Dune, 2021 (absolutely stunning, cannot recommend enough, whether or not you’ve read the book)

Wolfwalkers, 2020 (I loved the first two films in the Irish Mythology trilogy and this one completely blew me away)

Black Widow, 2021 (found family, no romantic subplots which is practically unheard of, women kicking ass, and a canon ace character? Sign me tf up)

Weathering With You, 2019 (utterly adorable and I listened to The Great Escape afterwards on repeat for hours)

Top Five TV Shows in 2021:

The Dragon Prince (Yes, we’ve been on hiatus for like 2 years. No, I don’t care. I rewatched it enough times to count)

Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood (recommended by @starsinyourskyes in retaliation for getting her hooked on the Stormlight Archive. Well, it worked. I’m obsessed, and I am absolute Royai trash)

Derry Girls (recommend by @iwillhaveamoonbase and her plethora of Sister Michael gifs. I laughed, I cried, good times)

The Wheel of Time (Siuanraine for the WIN. Also we're getting Aviendha next season right? Right??)

Uhhhhhhhhhhh freespace lol

Top Five Songs/Albums in 2021:

The Best Is Yet To Come by Shepard

Sky Full Of Song by Florence and the Machine

Heaven Knows by Five for Fighting

War Paint by Fletcher

Paper Planes by Elina

Top Five Books of 2021:

Rhythm of War by Brandon Sanderson (deep breath) (incoherent screaming)

Educated by Tara Westover

Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston (so. Much. Fun)

Artemis by Andy Weir (A rec from @mountainsatellite ! Let Jazz Bashara have her own private bathroom 2k21)(it's funny bc it's set in the future)

Wintering by Katherine May

Top Five Fanfictions of 2021:

Homeward Bound by @numptypylon (The Dragon Prince, an ongoing slow-burn Rayllum modern AU. It’s got fluff, it’s got angst, it’s got hurt/comfort, it’s got Rayllum being dorks--the emotional bandwith is both deep and wide!!)

delicate by @lantur (FMA, a Riza Hawkeye character study spanning from pre-canon childhood to well post-canon. Plenty of Royai, naturally. Words cannot give justice to how good this fic is and how much I love it!)

snipers solve 99% of all problems by silentwalrus (okay so like. I’m not usually a crossover person but holyyyy frick frack this FMA/Harry Potter one is fun. Still ongoing and basically 80 chapters of Edward Elric bitching about wizards and saying fuck 3,000 times. I hadn’t laughed this hard since I read The Martian.)

Son of Thorns by @truthwatcher-vez (The Stormlight Archive; I’m admittedly wayyy behind on this one, but it’s a post-RoW fic centered on Renarin Kholin. He definitely deserves some time to shine after we were robbed of content for him in RoW 😤 The author’s Rlainarin series, Chasms Between, is also excellent!)

Controlled Burn by madelinescribbles @okiedoketm (FMA role reversal where Al & Ed are climbing the ranks of the military and Roy commits human transmutation, blinding himself and getting Riza stuck in a taxidermy hawk. Ongoing fic, the characterization is soooo on point despite the role reversal, and the plot is so intriguing!)

Five good/positive things that happened to you in 2021

Seeing friends again!! I got to go visit a good college friend I hadn't seen in years since we graduated, and another friend I'd only seen once since we graduated came to visit twice! (Why do all my friends live across the country?)

I wrote. So much. Fanfiction 🤣 Hit a major slump this fall when rising COVID cases in my area started to make work hellish again, but I'm starting to get back into it!

Started therapy for the first time back in May. Also recently started a new antidepressant, after a bad adverse reaction scared me off from them for a while. Still have a long ways to go, but I'm feeling much better, and I haven't had an anxiety attack at work since.

Realized I'm asexual! Which explains soooo much about my life 🤣 Still coming to terms with it in some respects, but simply knowing brings so much peace and pride in my identity.

I got a Tumblr in 2020 but this was the year I really started becoming active in a few fandoms and really connecting with people on here! It's been a blast, and I love freaking out about shared interests with you all💕

[muertawrites]

Fireside (Zuko x Reader)

Word Count: 1,775

Author’s Note: I am so deeply sorry this took so long to post. I don’t know what happened but after Thanksgiving the creative part of my brain completely shut down and all I could do was lay in bed and play video games. But it’s back now so 🎉🎉🎉 happy new year to all of us! 

I got this request a WHILE ago and had written something else for it but after reconsidering, I totally hated it, so this is the rewrite for some cozy, wintery goodness. I also love this idea because I’m constantly cold - my feet and hands are always freezing and even in summer I’ll wear sweaters and hoodies because aircon can get pretty chilly when you have the body temp of your average vampire. 

Now for a little update: in the new year, I’ll be focusing more on original works than fanfiction. I’m still going to finish Two Halves, and I’ll still write fanfiction (because it’s still super fun) but I have so many ideas for original works that are taking over my brain that it seems only fitting to shift that direction. If you’re on my subscriber list and would like to only receive alerts for fanfic, let me know and I’ll add you to a separate list. 

I hope you’re all having a wonderful holiday, taking time to relax and spend time with loved ones, and generally just glad to have survived this shithole of a year. Here’s hoping that 2021 goes better - 2020 set the bar pretty low so it shouldn’t be too hard. 🥂

Snow was a rare occurrence in the Fire Nation. Summers typically scorched, followed by peaceful autumns and mild winters; a little rainfall was all one typically expected during the colder months in the Imperial City. 

This year, however, was much different. The mountains that bordered the villages and towns throughout the island were white capped under gray skies; streets were slickened by thick layers of ice that settled between cobblestones and creased the panes of windows; bracing breezes swept through landscapes unaccustomed to such unforgiving weather, carrying flurries of snow that bit at cheeks and cloaked the world in a dull ivory veil. Winter came to the Fire Nation seeking a cruel, unwarranted vengeance.

You woke in the middle of the night to find the fire beside your bed had died, leaving your borrowed room in a state of bitter, slicing cold. It wasn't the first time the Firelord’s palace had left you uncomfortably chilled since your arrival for his New Year’s celebrations, as the building was never meant to withstand this type of climate - sweeping ceilings, open breezeways, and tall windows with thin shutters ensured that the cold had its way. Being from the Northern Earth Kingdom, used to sturdy wooden lodges with massive fire pits that could burn an entire tree trunk with one lighting, this strange change of the typical season made you ache for home. 

Knowing there were no matches beside the hearth (given the sheer amount of fire benders that resided in the palace), you gathered up your courage and begrudgingly rolled from your mattress, taking the blankets with and wrapping them tightly around yourself. The walls around you creaked, shifting under the push of moaning winds, as you slipped into the hallway in search of your host. 

You were thankful that Zuko decided to keep his personal wing of the palace confined to a space that was mostly enclosed; the only breezeways in this part of the sprawling estate surrounded its courtyards and gardens, and were blocked by sets of heavy wood doors that shielded the inner parts of the building from being overcome by the elements. As you walked, traipsing through the corridor under your mound of blankets like some sort of shadowy, death-bringing phantom, you passed one of the windows that overlooked the gardens, and found it frosted under heavy white tufts of snow; puffy, clumped flakes whirled down from the sky, falling haphazardly as they escaped the grip of the whipping wind. Even in the relative warmth of the palace, your body shivered thinking of how frigid the air outside must be. 

Because of the abnormal cold, Zuko moved his mattress out of his bedroom and into his sitting room, where a large, decorative fireplace stood nestled into the far wall. You approached his sleeping form with gentle, quiet steps, being careful not to startle him; you lay a hand on his shoulder and he jolted awake, drawing a sharp breath in as he twisted to face you, blinking blearily to make out your features in the dark. 

“What are you doing?” he muttered. 

“I'm cold,” you whispered in response. “My fire went out.” 

Zuko sighed, fixing you with an irked, exhausted expression. 

“Seriously?” he groaned. “This is the third time this week.” 

“It's not my fault nobody has any friggin matches in this place,” you quipped. “And besides, why bring a servant all the way up here when I have one of the world’s greatest fire benders down the hall?”

Zuko huffed, then rolled back over in an attempt to shove you off. 

“There should be more blankets in your closet,” he grumbled. 

“I'm wearing all of them,” you retorted. 

You stood above him, waiting, but got no response. Shivering, and with an exasperated sigh, you pulled back the blankets around him, shuffling between them and nestling into his back; he snapped his head around once more, eyeing you suspiciously. 

“... Isn’t this a little uncomfortable?” he wondered. 

“Not really,” you replied. “We used to do this all the time when we were teenagers.” 

“We haven't done this since we were teenagers.”

You hummed, recalling your time together during the war. Even on the hottest days, your body was cold, your fingers always reasonably corpselike to anyone who happened to touch them - Zuko was one of those unfortunate people, and the lack of circulation in your limbs came as quite a worry to him. Throughout the day, he would take one of your hands in his, heating his palm until your skin took on a more lively temperature. When he noticed how much you layered at night when the air became cooler, he started sleeping nearer to you, eventually curling up around you to keep you warm. After the war, when he got into the habit of visiting you around the winter holidays, you still found yourself seeking him for warmth, tucking your hands into the sleeves of his robes or curling his palm around your icy fingers, finding sanctuary in the way he heated his skin to appease you. While it was true you hadn't slept together since you were younger, you hadn't ever needed to - desperate times called for desperate measures. 

“I should have remembered that you get so grumpy when you're tired,” you teased him, rubbing your feet against his; he hissed, but didn't pull away. 

“You're freezing,” he commented. “I should have remembered you're dead on the inside.” 

You giggled, sighing happily as the familiar heat of his skin warming like a furnace chased the chill from your toes. You slid your feet up along his ankles, causing him to shiver; his body tensed for a moment, then eased into your touch, quickly finding comfort in its familiarity. 

“Aang used to assume we were a couple because of this,” Zuko mumbled. “He still does.” 

“You're just a good friend,” you replied. You nuzzled your face into the broad, solid expanse of his back, breathing in his scent of scorched wood and sea salt. He felt like home. “Good friends don't let their friends freeze to death.” 

Zuko chuckled, taking hold of your hands that lay on his waist and cupping them within his own; he held your knuckles up to his mouth and huffed warm, smokey air onto them, heating them until they no longer felt cold. He tucked them beneath the fabric of his tunic, keeping them tepid between the fabric of his undershirt. 

“Uncle says the same thing,” he mused. “He says we treat each other like lovers, whether we realize it or not.” 

“My neighbors have asked me what my husband does that takes him away for so long out of the year...” you commented, eliciting another breathy laugh from your companion. “But I think I'd know if you were in love with me.” 

Zuko rolled over, turning to face you; his arm latched at your waist, his chest almost pressed to you and your noses grazing each other in the small space of his mattress. You blushed, the color blending with the soft, balmy glow of the low hearth behind him. 

“What makes you think I'm not in love with you?” he wondered. 

You paused, watching the flames flicker over the angular features of his face. Though he was silhouetted, and so close he seemed to envelop all of you, you could make out a tender gleam in his eye; could feel the flutter in his chest as he split it open, tentatively revealing his heart to you. 

“... I'd like to think you would have mentioned it,” you answered after a moment, “but I know you better than that.” 

Zuko grinned; you watched the curve of his cheek as it swelled with the action. 

“I might have mentioned it,” he murmured, his voice lilting with a gentle mirth. “Just not to you.”

“Of course not,” you teased. You mirrored his smile, easing into him as his foot began to stroke against your ankle once more. “Either way, I know you don't love me.” 

“And why is that?” Zuko whispered. 

“Well… you never write to me about anything exciting,” you replied. “You always seem so content to write to me about your thoughts, or what plays you've seen recently, or your conversations with Iroh. You never tell me about the impressive, world-altering Firelord stuff or your incredible exploits as a warrior.” 

Zuko smirked, raising a hand to brush some hair away from your face. His fingers were calloused and lukewarm, tracing over your temple with consideration and care. 

“Why else?” 

“You've never tried to kiss me,” you noted, “or touch me like a lover. You never try to push our boundaries past anything that's comfortable for us. Even right now - I'm laying in your bed, but you refuse to touch me in a way you're unsure of.” 

“Then you don't love me, either,” Zuko added. His body had gravitated flush to yours, your legs braided together under the pile of blankets you'd buried him in. “You only want to sleep with me when you're cold. You could just as easily call a servant for help.” 

“And you only want to keep me warm out of obligation,” you agreed. “It wouldn’t make you look very good if I died of hypothermia on your watch.” 

For a long moment, Zuko gazed at you. You basked in his silence, the easiness of his form so close to yours, the native feeling of his arm around your waist and his breath tickling your cheeks. The fire snapped quietly in its hearth, its flames rising and falling in time with his inhales and exhales. 

“I’ve missed this,” Zuko admitted in a whisper. “Laying with you. I wish we could do it more often.” 

“I’ve missed it, too,” you affirm. “I always used to sleep better with you.” 

“And that’s it?” Zuko teased. 

“That’s it,” you giggled back. 

He chanced a kiss to your forehead, pressing his lips between your brows and letting them linger there, savoring the coolness of your skin. You shut your eyes, giving yourself entirely to his touch. 

“In the new year… do you think we could be lovers?” he asked as he pulled away. 

“... I think your uncle is right,” you murmured. “I think we already are.” 

With a faint, bashful smile, Zuko pulled you closer (if the act were even possible), hugging you tightly to him; you held him close, pressing the whole of your body to his and soaking in his steady, comforting warmth. As the wind howled outside, shaking the flimsy wooden eaves of the feeble shelter around you, you fell asleep in the heat of his fireside, safe in the knowledge that his arms held you. 

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[gb-patch]

Ask Answers (March 3rd, 2021)

Here’s our latest batch of anon ask answers! Thanks for waiting for them.

Will there be a 'Our Life' game for each season? Please say we're getting a winter one! 

As of right now we’re only planning on making two, summer and fall. They take quite a while to finish and we’re not sure where we’ll be when the second OL is truly wrapped up. But it’s not impossible we can do a third. Though, four Our Life games is probably not super likely, honestly, aha. Maybe the third game, if we make one, could be switch between winter and spring or something.

What engine/engines do you use to make your games? 

We use Renpy for all our projects!

For version 1.2 of OL, did you make any changes to the DLC? If so, could you post a changelog detailing what exactly (or at least a general overview)? If it's not too much trouble, could you also elaborate on the bugs/errors you fixed in the base game? 

There aren’t really any changes to the DLCs, except for the voiced name DLC getting an expansion. We fixed very few small typos and added a couple extra lines. Unfortunately, we don’t have a list of exactly what all the little fixes were.

I've been playing OL and I love the characters! As soon as Baxter showed up, I knew I wanted to learn more about him! Would you consider adding him as a prospective LI in the future? 

Yep, Baxter (and Derek) will be getting his own romance story as an optional DLC late in 2021! Glad you like him.

Hellooo! First off I'm a huge fan of the game and can't stop playing it. However, I was wondering about how much domestic life with Cove we'll get to see in step 4. Meaning the time before the wedding and the time after. In my game Cove and I talked about having children and I was hoping that would be an option in step 4. Either way, I cannot wait for the release and I send my best to everyone working on the production :) thanks! 

I’m sorry, there’s no children or scenes after the two are married. There’s sort of endless possibilities for what that future could be like, so we unfortunately can’t depict it. You only get scenes before they’re married and, if you get the wedding DLC, you can see the day they get married. It ends there, though. But thank you for the well-wishes!

Hello! I was just wondering, so step 4 is going to be similiar to the prologue/epilogue scenes of the game. Is the Wedding DLC going to be one long scene too or will that have moments? (I love the game by the way, its ruined all other visual novels for me in the most wonderful way <3 ) 

Yeah, Step 4 and the wedding DLC will be like the prologues/summer ended parts of the game. There won’t be separate Moments you can play in any order. I’m really happy you like the game so much!

You said that the OL MC's birthday can't be in summer, but what if you headcanoned it to be? 

You can headcanon it as being in summer! There just aren’t birthday events in the game even if you do know your MC was born in summer. We had to leave those out, since some people might not want their MC to be born in summer and then they’d miss out on extra birthday scenes because of it. It wouldn’t have been fair.

Hello!😺 I absolutely love your game!😻 I can't wait for DLS with Derek and Baxter. And I wonder if Baxter could have seen Cove and MC at the party during their first failed dance? Or is Baxter only paying attention to who he's dancing with, or is he not dancing with anyone at the soiree at all then? 

Baxter isn’t really paying attention to the couples on the floor. He’s just cruising the outskirts for someone available to dance with him. So he doesn’t get any memories of the MC or Cove at that party if the two just dance with each other. It’s great to hear you like the game!

time-wise/step-wise when does the nsfw dlc take place? 

It’s not super strict in terms of an exact of weeks/months, but generally it’s sometime not long after the end of Step 3.

Heya! I'm currently obsessed with Our Life (I played through the entire game on Valentine's Day, hahaha– ha... hah), and I have one silly question: if I start playing Step 3 with the less... "romantically inclined" interest levels (Fond & Disinterest), is there still a chance of getting a romantic ending with Cove? Can Cove and the MC realize "they're the one for me" in just one summer? Or... are confessions off the table completely unless at least at Crush level? Thank you in advance! 

So happy you’re having fun with it! In OL1 deciding that Cove is your friend means he’s truly only a friend. You can’t decide you have a crush partway through. But we are considering doing things differently in future games.

hey i have some questions about our life

a) is there a way to be friends with that mean bowlcut kid or is he always... like tha

b. what is coves ethnicity?

A. He is always like that, haha. At least as a kid, he does grow up to be different~

B. Cove’s mom Kyra is white, but Cliff’s race doesn’t come up and players are able to headcanon it. So Cove is half white and half whatever you prefer Cliff to be. 

how do you get to the two mc cut-in scenes from the new update?

&

Hiii! I'm doing another playthrough (it's only like my 100th time playing through the entire game) after the 1.2 update, and I was wondering how to get the new art? I also really love all the new stuff, thank you for working so hard and creating such a wonderful game :)

You can check our our CG guide on Steam for that! Thank you for the kind words.

Sorry to bother you, but I have a question about the Patreon moment. Will there be initiative settings there too? And if there aren't, will the MC lead the whole thing or will Cove lead at certain points too? Thank you~ 

There will still be flexibly in what you’re comfortable with and whether you want Cove to automatically do things or for choices to always be involved :]. And you don’t need to apologize!

Hello!! I wanted to ask a couple of questions about Our Life:

1. Will we able to buy all the DLC via Steam or will there be some of them only available in Patreon? Just to know if I should create a Patreon user XD

2. Will Our Life: Now and Forever be about the current MC, Cove and the other characters or will it be a game with a New MC, new romantic options and new characters?

1. There will be a Patreon-only NSFW bonus Moment. But all the normal planned DLCs will release on Steam.

2. Our Life: Now & Forever is about new characters- new MC, new family, new LI, etc.

just some small bug I noticed: even if you didn't ask Cove to dance, if he asks you at the Soiree in Step 2 later and you say yes to dancing, the MC acts like they got to dance with Cove again even if it was the first time. 

Thank you for the report on that! We thought it was fixed, but I guess it didn’t work.

I was messing around with the new update and I noticed that all the hands in the firefly CGs have the same skin tone regardless of what you put in, (with the exception of the really dark skin color) is this a glitch or something? 

The skin tones aren’t the same. It’s just because they’re out at night with only fireflies for light that it makes each image look dark and therefore similar. But if you line them up together it’s clear how there are changes in every option.

How long did it take to plan out and write the story for OL? Not including the programming, art stuff, or the DLC chapters, I mean just planning and writing the base game story alone. The base game story seems hefty as is, and then on top of that there's the changes to scenes depending on MC's and Cove's personalities and relationship, I'm curious how long that took 

It took basically the full development time, aha. I’m someone who doesn’t fully outline a project before start and instead continues to come up with stuff as a project progresses. There were new parts to the story being created right up to near the launch. So, starting in 2016 or so to later 2020, with some breaks/hold-ups throughout that time.

Hello! I'm really, really enjoying Our Life: Beginning and Always, it was the kind of sweet, wholesome content I needed during these past months. I had a quick question, will you be making any female characters for the MC to romance? In this game or any others like it? I'm a lesbian and I'd love to have a female love interest with such well written romance as yours! Thank you so much. 

Thank you for the nice comment! Our Life: Beginnings & Always won’t have a female LI since we didn’t want to treat other gender options as second fiddle to the male lead. But we have just started full production on Our Life: Now & Forever, which will have a starring female LI! There’s a silhouette glimpse of her Step 1 self here~

-------------------------------------------------

Thanks everyone for sending the questions :D

FAQ   If you prefer to just see the main posts without all the asks/reblogs, feel free to follow our side account instead: GB Patch Updates Bl

[amberfaber40]

Mugler Spring 2020 Ready-to-Wear Fashion Show

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Tracking all the standout looks from this season's top collections.

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In honor of the late fashion designer's legendary career, a look back at some of his best moments for Chanel.

A model walks the runway during the Alexandre Vauthier Spring Summer...

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Fendi Spring 2021 Ready-to-Wear Fashion Show

Victoria Beckham Fall 2019 Ready-to-Wear Fashion Show

The complete Victoria Beckham Fall 2019 Ready-to-Wear fashion show now on Vogue Runway.

Dua Lipa and Gigi Hadid Just Walked Versace

Plus see more from Milan Fashion Week's full spectrum of style.

The Best Looks from Paris Fashion Week Fall 2020

From Dior all the way to Chanel.

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From the biggest trends to the most covetable collections, we round up the new season

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Photos from Kendall Jenner's Runway Transformation

Hailey Baldwin and Gigi Hadid strut the Versace runway in NYC

Hailey Baldwin, Gigi Hadid, Emily Ratajkowski and Kaia Gerber commanded attention on the Versace catwalk in New York on Sunday night.

Gigi Hadid flaunts her endless pins in a slinky gown during PFW

The model, 24, showcased her endless pins in a slinky gown as she walked the runway for the Jacquemus Menswear Fall/Winter 2020-2021 show in Paris, France on Saturday.

Paloma Elsesser Walked for Fendi and We’re Obsessed

A small win for curve models!

[bts-trans]

210204 BigHit’s Tweet

[네이버 포스트] 소복소복~ 방탄소년단의 2021 윈터 패키지 비하인드 대방출! (@ https://m.post.naver.com/viewer/postView.nhn?volumeNo=30646656&memberNo=51325039)

#BTS #방탄소년단

[Naver Post] Softly, gently~ The grand reveal of behind the scenes from BTS' 2021 Winter Package!

Naver Post Translation

Keep reading for a plain text version of the blog post! For a picture edit version, please check out our twitter post!

Title: [BTS] 방탄소년단이 강원도에 떴다?! 소복소복~ 2021 윈터 패키지 맛보기!

Title: [BTS] BTS popped up in Gangwon-do?! Softly, gently~* A preview of the 2021 Winter Package!

(T/N: A description for how snow falls. Jimin uses the phrase in his Soundcloud release ‘Christmas Love’.)

아-하!

Hi-A!*

(T/N: Stands for ‘Hi ARMY’, which is how Bangbell always starts these posts.)

안녕하세요 아미 여러분! 방림이 2월의 첫인사 드립니다!

Hello ARMYs! Hello and welcome to February!

방림이가 나타난 이유! 벌써 눈치채셨을 것 같은데요 그래서 더 긴말하지 않겠습니다!

The reason I have appeared is! I think you probably have guessed it already So I won’t spend too much time explaining!

네 그렇습니다. 방탄소년단의 윈터 패키지가 돌아왔습니다!!!

Yes, that’s right. BTS’ Winter Package is back!!!

이번엔 강원도에 나타났다고 하는 비티엣스!

BTS showed up at Gangwon-do this time!

윈터 패키지 촬영 현장을 어디 한 번 방림이 마음대로 공개해보겠습니다!

I’ll show you the Winter Package shoot the way I want to!

분위기 있는 모습으로 첫 촬영을 시작한 정국과 진

Jungkook and Jin start the first shoot off with looks that really have a vibe to them

비주얼 무슨 일이야..? 나 왜 웃고 있어..? 포스트 시작부터 웃음 짓게 만드네요~

What’s up with these visuals..? Why am I laughing? The post really makes you smile right from the beginning~

하지만 역시 이 둘에게선 장난을 빼놓을 수 없었다

But of course, these two can’t help but kid around

멋있게 촬영하면서 귀엽기까지 한 비티엣스 (눈물) 방림이 심장 돌려내..

BTS go from cool to cute in their photoshoots (sob) Give me back my heart..

바다+방탄=행복 예쁨 기쁨 천국 (대충 뭐 좋은 건 다..)

The sea + Bangtan = Happiness Beauty Heaven (pretty much everything good..)

비주얼 조합 머선 일.. 세��에 존재하는 좋은 수식어는 다 갖다 붙여야 형용이 될 것 같아요..

What is this combination of visuals.. It feels like you have to put in all the good adjectives in the world to be able to describe them..

방깨비 뚝딱 한편 나왔다..

Thump thump, an episode of Bangoblin is now out..

(T/N: A reference to the spell goblins say in Korean folklore, “thump thump, appear now, gold!”. ‘Goblin’ was also the name of a popular Korean drama that aired in 2016. The drama filmed in Gangwon-do as well. )  

사실 방림이.. 저 날부터 성냥 들고 다니는데.. 나타나 주질 않네요...

Actually I.. have been carrying around a match since that day but.. He doesn’t appear before me...

(T/N: In the popular drama ‘Goblin’, the female lead lights a candle to summon the male lead, who is a goblin.)

오랜만에 나타난 슈가! 비주얼 마구마구 터트렸다는 건 안 비밀~

Suga is here after a long while! The fact that his visuals have really exploded is no secret~

빼놓을 수 없는 투 샷! 바라만 봐도 믿음직스럽고.. 듬직하고..

Can’t leave out a two-shot! Just looking at them makes you feel like they’re trustworthy.. Dependable..

뭐 그렇더라고요 (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥｀)

Well I mean that’s what they say (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥｀)

분위기 뿜뿜 뽐내며 단체 촬영도 마무리!!

With some intense vibes The group photoshoot comes to an end too!!

이렇게 모여있으니까.. 방림이는 세상에 두려울 게 없어요..

When they’re all together like this.. There is nothing in this world that scares me..

호에엑!! 갑자기 이렇게 귀여워진다고?! 아미들 심장 180도 뒤집어 놓은 귀여운 지민 등!장!

Ack!! You’re telling me they suddenly got all cute like this?! Jimin is!here! To make ARMYs’ hearts flip a full 180

눈을 가지고 장난치는 정국을 보니.. 그저 어린 시절로 돌아가고 싶고.. (이런 소꿉친구 사귀고 싶고.. 속마음 아님)

When I look at Jungkook playing around with the snow.. I feel like returning to my childhood.. (I want a childhood bestie like him.. No, I’m not just revealing my inner thoughts)

그렇다..

That’s what it is..

어떻게 이래요..? 스노우볼 보다 쟈근 얼굴..

How is he like this..? A face smaller than a snowball..

방림이 눈 감아..

I’m closing my eyes..

이건 혹시 정국 쟁탈전? 방림이도 바아로~ 참여하겠습니다!

Is this perhaps a fight for Jungkook? I shall also take part immediately~!

피융~~~ (튕겨 나가는 소리 아님..)

Pew~~~ (That’s not the sound of me bouncing off..)

지진정 조합.. 바라보기만 해도 재밌어.. 바라보기만 해도 행복해..

The JiJinJung combination.. It feels fun even if you’re only looking.. I feel happy even if I’m only looking..

호비 생일 혹시 10월 4일로 바뀌었나요..? 아.. 1004... 라는 숫자밖에 떠오르지 않아서요..

Hobi have you perhaps changed your birthday to 10/04..? Ah.. 1004... is the only number that comes to mind..

(T/N: 1004 in Korean is ‘천사/cheonsa’, which is also the word for angel.)

이 사진을 보니 내가 눈사람이라니..!

When I look at this picture Suga shouting ‘I can’t believe I’m a snowman..!’

를 외쳤던 슈가가 생각나는데요..?

comes to mind..?

(T/N: A reference to Suga’s Weverse post from 25 Dec 2020, where he posted during BTS’ performance on SBS Gayo Daejun.)  

이렇게 멋진 눈사람 있으면 제가 사겠습니다.

If there are snowmen this cool out there I will buy them.

이 조합은 바라보기만 해도 해피해피 힐링 유닛~★

Just looking at this combination makes me feel happy happy Healing unit~★

슈가: 아 호비랑 사진 찌거야지 (주섬주섬)

Suga: Ah I need to take a picture with Hobi (Fumbling)

찰칵!

Click!

방림이 좋아하는 사람 손~~ 저요 저요!!

Raise your hand if you like Bangbell~~ Me, me!!

아아.. 이거 아닌가요..?

Ah.. isn’t that what this is..?

어떠한 컨셉도 소화력이 대단해!!!!! 귀염+멋짐+#$(+($*%( 기타 등등 = 천재만재라는 뜻

His ability to pull off any concept is incredible!!!!! Cute+cool+#$(+($*%( etc etc = he’s a genius

새하얀 눈 속 알앤뷔♥

R&V in the pure white snow♥

왜 울고 있는지 여긴 알앤뷔 뿐인데 (Feat. 네시)

Why are you crying It’s only R&V here (Feat. 4 O’CLOCK)

(T/N: Title of RM & V’s collaboration song released on Soundcloud on 8 Jun 2017.)

알앤뷔 좀 안 착한 것 같아요…

R&V look like they’re not nice...

방림이 마음속에 안착! >.<

They’ve made a nice safe landing in my heart! >.<

(T/N: Wordplay on the Korean words for ‘not nice’, which is ‘안 착한/an chak-han’, and ‘nice/safe landing’, which is ‘안착/an-chak’.)

이 사진을 보고 슈가의 자리가 탐나는 아미 손! (1/7777777777777777777)

ARMYs, raise your hand if you’re eyeing Suga’s position! (1/7777777777777777777)

아~~~~~~~~~~~ 미

AR~~~~~~~~~~~ MY

라고 외치는 것 같은 귀여운 단체 샷!

Is what it looks like they’re shouting in this cute group shot!

웃음만 가득했던 즐거운 스키장에서의 촬영도 마무리되었습니다!

The fun ski photoshoot full of laughter has now come to an end!

혹시.. 강원도 유형문화재이신지..? 제 눈에는 뷔주얼 난리 난 조각상만 보이는데요..?

Are you perhaps.. Gangwondo’s tangible cultural asset..? All I see is a statue with V-suals that have wreaked havoc on my eyes..?

아니.. RM씨.. 이러면 안 피곤해요…?

RM.. come on.. Aren’t you tired...?

이렇게 멋있으면 하루 종일 아미들 머릿속을 돌아다니잖아요 촤하하하하!!

When you’re this cool, You keep running around in ARMYs’ heads all day bwahahahaha!!

세상.. 나이는 나만 먹네..

Good god.. I’m the only one ageing..

멋진 모습 보여주다 귀여운 표정도 찰칵

While showing us how cool he is We get a snapshot of his cute expressions as well

(사실 바람에 눈이 시렸다는 건.. 어.. 모른척해요..)

(Actually his eyes were stinging because of the wind.. ah.. just pretend you don’t know..)

마치 슈가를 위해 존재한 풍경처럼 배경과 너무나 잘 어울렸던 촬영!

It’s as if the landscape exists for Suga He really matched the background so well in this photoshoot!

잘생긴 애 옆에 잘생긴 애 옆에 또 잘생긴 애 옆에 또 잘생긴 애...!!!

A handsome guy next to a handsome guy next to another handsome guy next to another handsome guy...!!!

그거 바로 방탄이야!!!!!

That’s Bangtan!!!!!

손에 낀 장갑도 귀엽고.. 머리에 눌러 쓴 모자도 귀엽고.. 꼬부랑 앞머리도 귀여운 그저 갓 홉!

The glove on his hand is cute.. The cap on his head is cute too.. The curled bangs are cute too That’s God Hope!

똑똑.. 타지에서 오신 분이 있으시다면서요? 아아 여기 계셨네요!

Knock-knock.. I hear there’s someone visiting from out of town? Ah, so he was here!

정국이라는 판타지..

This fantasy called Jungkook..

(T/N: A play on the word ‘타지/ta-ji’, which means ‘out of town’ or literally ‘another place’, and ‘판타지/pan-ta-ji’, which is the Korean spelling for ‘fantasy’.)

길 잃은 강냥이..? 제가 데려갈게요!!

A pupkitty who’s lost his way..? I’ll take him!!

윈터 패키지 촬영 내내 리즈 갱신의 갱신을 거듭한 박강냥씨

Park Pupkitty goes through golden era after golden era throughout the Winter Package shoot

귀염 뽀짝 뽀짝 모든 모멘트가 귀여웠던 꾹, 찜, 홉 유닛 촬영!

Cutie pies The unit photoshoot of Kook, Chim and Hope, whose every moment was cute!

멋진 풍경 속에서의 비티엣스를 마지막으로 방림이는 포스트를 마무리해보려 합니다!

I’ll wrap the post up with one last picture of BTS against an amazing view

이제는 빠지면 아쉬운 셀카 타임!!

Now it’s time for what has become a must-have, selfie time!!

비티엣스의 귀엽고 멋진 모습들을 가득가득 담은 2021 BTS WINTER PACKAGE에 많은 관심 부탁드리며,

2021 BTS WINTER PACKAGE is full of BTS’ cute and cool sides, please show it lots of support!

방림이는 정말 마지막으로 보너스 사진 한 장을 두고 인사드리겠습니다!

I’ll give you one last bonus picture and then I’ll say goodbye!

또 만나요! 아-뿅!♥

See you! A-Poof!♥

(T/N: Short for “Bye ARMY! Poof!”, which is how Bangbell always ends these posts.)

귀엽다_귀여워_보자마자_소리_지를_수_밖에_없는_사진_철푸덕_소년단.JPG

Cute_TheyreCute_You_CantHelpBut_Scream_AsSoonAsYouSee_ThePicture_BoyscoutsGo_Plop.JPG

[Note]

본 포스트는 빅히트 엔터테인먼트에서  직접 운영하는 포스트입니다.

This Naver Post account is personally run by Big Hit Entertainment.

[End Note]

Trans cr; Aditi & Faith | Typeset cr; Laura & XPXOXD @ bts-trans © TAKE OUT WITH FULL CREDITS

[smortbokuto]

Guilt.

warnings: my shit writing, fluff?? angst to the fucking bones, major character death, mentions of death, implied cheating.

pairings: ushijima x oikawa, iwaizumi x oikawa.

a/n: enjoy my trash <3

summary: realizations always hits in the end yet hits hard. Oikawa regrets his actions and will keep regretting for his whole life..

word count: 3.6k

Sequel

❛19th January, 2023.❜

Key rattled in the keyhole as he turned them open, the voice a bit to loud for the mood. creaking the door open of his once shared apartment, with him. putting down the umbrella, which had frozen dews decorating its covers, he raided the area with tired eyes.

The windows, dusty and tainted, allowing slight light to bleed into the room, the dusty floor, marked with different stains, being illuminated. the couches covered with a pale cloth, preventing them from getting dirty. the shelf in the other corner were properly visible with spider webs all over. the rug, that was once sparkling clean now looked like had hardened mud and slit all over.

taking off his overcoat and hooking it over the rusty hooks embedded over the wall with torn off wallpapers just adjacent to the entry. nostalgia had hit him like a boulder falling over something much smaller and frail, completely crushing him as he saw all the unevenly hanging frames with them. smiling. happy.

why, why? why. why?! why??

padding into the room he scrunched his nose in frustration at the creaking sound of the wooden flooring. god, he was so used to the marble ones now. this was so annoying. so weird.

why was he even here? ah, in a week new residents will being coming here to start a new life. just like how they both had started 6 years ago...

'hope they don't end up like me' he made a mental note to wish the new family his best wishes for their journey they were going to go on.

sighing he strode towards the shelf. the lights flickered for a tad bit longer than they were supposed to. smoothly he started to pick up all the frames, empty, with photos (memories), or broken, and tossed them into the box he had brought along. what of he left them here? will the new family know about his sins of the past? he doesn't know.

moving further inside he kept picking up all the small items of misery (memories) and tossing them into the box. he wished them to burn to ashes. Oikawa just couldn't stand the pictures, the letters, the small items, gifts, souvenirs he had received by Iwaizumi in the past. with a white face he kept collecting all the stuff from room to room in a way to wipe away the remnants of the life they both had created.

cursing mentally as he stood in front of the last room, bedroom. a place where they shared everything, emotions, bodies, love, everything. entering the room he took a deep breath, eyes tight shut as he felt a suffocating gust hit his face. his breath hitched in his throat as he saw an all too familiar room. he could see his 'wasted' years in this room, doing everything and anything.

he worked upon collecting all the stuff he wanted to get rid of. he wanted to get rid of his existence. he was so close to it. he could start a new life. a free one. just a bit of fuel and a spark of flame.

after what felt like ages he felt content with the filled boxes with all the soon to be burned memories.

free? free. free!

a satisfied breath left his lungs, turning into a hazy white puff as it mixed into the chilly atmosphere of the room. the sun had already gone down with the rise of a crescent moon hanging in the sky with gloomy grey clouds. an indication to a snowy day that comes along.

snow?

his heart pang in the traps of his ribs at the thought.

┊a smiled crept on the shorter male's face, face flushed in soft hues of pink as he scrambled out from the warmth of the bed, dragging his feet towards the glass window that were draped with soft white silk curtains.

"Toru, wake up." he had called out to the sleeping male, curled up in the bed who just groaned at the call of his name.

"what is it?" voice raspy, he drawled out.

"it snowed! its so pretty outside." he chided, his morning voice heavy yet a hint of excitement laced with it. ┊

snow. his favorite time of the season. Iwaizumi's happy season.

clicking his tongue, that had the room echo with the voice he tried to forget the small memory he reminisced just now. distracting himself he looked around the room for the last time.

'nothing should be left behind..'

nodding to himself he stood up from the bed edge he had been sitting, leaving the room. once and for all.

free.

free?

his leg hit the nightside stand, the dusty lamp disbalancing and falling down. ignoring he broken pieces he picked up the head of the lamp to keep it back only for his eyes to get stuck at the small opening of the drawer.

nope.

opening the drawer slowly his eyes widened at the slightly stained hardcover diary comfortably lying caged in there.

he knows. he knows too well to not reach for it. to not open it. to not trace the pages with the tips of his fingers. to not read the date entry.

yet, he did it.

❝7th December, 2018.

today it snowed. it looked so ethereal outside. today is special for me. its the first time it snowed while my living with Toru. I wish to see more days like these with him.

-Hajime.❞

The first entry of the page.

"tsk, what's the point to write it down?" the brunette vocalized his thoughts. the thought of writing something so trivial sounded so stupid. why would he even to take the pain to write it all?

and so he flipped to the next page.

smoothing out the page he hummed as he felt Iwaizumi's clear writing under the cold touch of his fingers. so selfish.

he read all the pages. all the dates. all the events.

their first slow dance together in the dim living room on a summer evening, their first time on a rainy night, their first fight on a mid autumn season and how Hajime wished to fix it as soon as possible. everything was there in it.

it was always about them. never him alone. oikawa was always a spotlight.

humming in satisfaction that maybe, just maybe, he will be free. glad at the fact that iwaizumi didn't hold a grudge against him in any of these small snippets of life jotted down neatly in a captive of pale pages and hard covers.

pages fluttered as he flipped to another page. his brows furrowing as he found the page blank.

flip. then another and another and another. all of them were blank. pale and empty. his heart clenched and stung at the empty pages. it felt like a void of emotions. not his emotions but his long ago lovers'.

he flipped again, pupils dilating slightly as he saw a new date entry. but his stomach churned as he read the date.

❛11th September, 2020.❜

A whole year? from writing everyday, why was there a pause of a whole year? he flipped back to the previous empty pages. the pages weren't torn then why a year gap?

'unusual..'

but he shook away the feeling and flipped back to the new entry that he was yet to read.

❝I miss him... he has been working so much. i am happy that he is doing something he loves but its been long since we had done anything like we used to do...❞

a rush of guilt travelled through the span of his veins. he had fell out of love weeks before this new entry. but- did Iwaizumi knew about this fact?

┊8th July, 2020,

"will you tell him about us?" a gruff voice spoke, lying on the same comfort of bed that oikawa shared with iwaizumi. the respective owner of the voice stared up at the naked form of the brunette who was indulging himself in smoking and puffing out his lungs. a try to erase out the smell of sex? maybe.

"not yet..." oikawa slurred out as he puffed another heavy thick smoke into the traps of the four walled room "..he is too blind in love to even think about me doing such thing."

"you are not being fair with him." the voice spoke again after silence covered over the room.

"listen," he was pissed. oikawa was pissed at the accusation. he knew it was right, the accusation but he didn't want to accept that. the fact that he had fell out of love. "it's literally my life and my lover, i don't need your opinion about it, Ushijima."┊

guilt filled his system at the thought about how sick and vile his move was against someone who loved him unconditionally.

if only he had tried harder. harder to be a better person, a better partner and a better human. but he didn't. pathetic.

feeling the guilt pump up in him he flipped the page again. empty, blank, pale pages. again.

❝17th November, 2020.

Its still the same... he returns late home. we don't eat our meals together, our talks are short and have no emotions that it used to carry. i miss it. i miss it all. i will wait.❞

"why? what the fuck are you trying to do here. Hajime? are you trying to give me a guilt trip?" he voiced his deafening thoughts. how selfish of Iwaizumi to take such a step against him. his own lover.

"its working. so stop..." his voice wavered. was he really qualified enough to be labeled as a 'lover' for Hajime? after what all he had done to the other man he deserved it.

"stop. I don't deserve it." he does. he does deserve it. he knows it too well.

he flipped. then flipped. sobs raked his body as he read all the different dates all throughout the winter season of that dreaded years, 2020. he read Iwaizumi's thought, insecurities on maybe he was not good enough for Oikawa and how maybe he was done with him but staying with him out of pity.

He flipped to the page where an all too familiar date was jotted down. He remembers everything. every action he had taken that might have ruined iwaizumi bit by bit.

┊9th April, 2021.

the keys jingled as they clashed with the glass key holder in the porch area. the brunette ran his fingers through his hair and sighed out tiredly. 'work' was exhausting.

"hey." a low voice greeted him at the end of the hallway.

"hi, have you eaten?" oikawa replied back as fast as possible not wanting to hear any questions from the man standing in front of him, arms crossed over his chest.

"he shorted man shook his head. "i was waiting for you."

"i was out with my friend after practice, we have already eaten. you should eat too." he didn't know the heaviness of the words he had thrown on the other male.

"oh, that's fine." Iwaizumi smiled as he tried to take in and digest whatever was thrown over him by the taller male. "by the way, i got a present for you. it's kept in the bedroom."

"present for what? what's the occasion?" oikawa was quick to whip his head to the direction of the other male, who had his back turned at him as he fumbled around the kitchen.

there was a silence, an awkward and a heavy one.

Oikawa, now anxious, took a step forward "hey, ushijim- Hajime, what's the present for?" shit. shit for fuck sake he messed up.

"hm? what?" displaying an act of not catching he turned to face oikawa, the soft smile never faltering his features.

oikawa was quick to repeat the question. to which iwaizumi casually told him it was their anniversary.

"it's okay, you have been working a lot." he had stated.┊

maybe if Oikawa was true to the man. maybe if he had tried harder to love him more and in a correct manner he wouldn't be reading this. maybe if he had given iwaizumi what he had deserved.

❝9th April, 2021.

oh, i was right... it hurts to know i was not good enough but maybe i deserved it. i hope he is happy with this other guy he is with.❞

his heart dropped to his stomach. why was he accepting that? he knew when he had uttered out that other mans' name then why didn't he confront? why did he stay quiet? why didn't he ask him to leave?

why? why? why? why?!

and then no answer to these why's.

his body went numb at how blindly Iwaizumi stood there for him even knowing he was an option. second one.

flip.

flip.

flip.

he sobbed more as he kept tuning the pages. few pale blank empty and few with dates and entries were he was not good enough for oikawa and he could have been better.

"Its not your fault. its not. stop!" finally breaking down he sobbed into the diary, staining the pages with his tears.

❝19th July, 2021.

i was... diagnosed. glioblastoma (GBM). it was undiagnosed all this time and... how will i tell this to Toru?❞

"why?! why are you still thinking about me??? you were-" too much. thats the right word for what he was feeling at the moment. how could he still love him and think about him even though he was practically dying? just why?

all the memories flooded in. all the years of time they took to build a loving relationship only for oikawa to burn it down in one day, over a fucked up reason.

it could have been so easy if iwaizumi had confronted and cut ties then and there only. he was being selfish.

there was a strong urge to just burn the diary there only and act like it all never happened. it was so easy to do it.

but,

can he really do it?

no, he is ought to drown in all the pending guilt and regrets that had been filling up all his holes, draining into his system till it was overflowing. he has to suffer.

he flipped yet another page.

❝27th August, 2021.

i have regrets. i don't want to carry them with me to a new journey. I wanted to love oikawa the way he deserved. i wanted to be him only. its selfish, i know. i was supposed to propose him on our anniversary. i was supposed to care for him and grow old and gray with him. it was all about him. it will always be about him. i love you Toru... i always will. i will be leaving soon. i want to watch you from the sidelines but i can't, not anymore. i will look at you and cheer for you still. be happy, okay?❞

was this really how it was supposed to end?

"why? why didn't you ever tell me about this?" his breath came out ragged and labored. it didn't matter right now.

❝16th September, 2021.

i still love you but i can't burden you with what i am going through not when you are finally happy. i happy that you can confine in someone now. i love you and i always will.❞

those were just mere words written over dead pages by someone that didn't exist. not anymore. then why was it affecting so much? why did it feel like all the words were the boulders that kept stacking on and on over Oikawa's lean body?

there were so many whys and no one to answer...

his last memory flashed before his red puffy eyes.

┊18th September, 2021.

the balls smashed hard against the gym floors. sneakers squeaking against the polished floors.

hair hanging over his forehead oikawa flopped down on the floor. leaning back on one arm as he sipped harshly through his bottle. he let out a satisfied hum as his thirst was satiated only to stop mid tracks as he heard a muffled vibration coming from his bag flopped beside him.

rummaging and fishing the phone out as easy as any other task but when he saw the familiar number flash he was hesitant. nonetheless he answered only for his throat to go parch at the not so familiar voice reporting something he could never imagine of.

"you were on Mr. Iwaizumi's contact. he is in emergency right now. he had collapsed during his regular visit here so please come here as soon as possible." the line was dead then.

hastily packing his stuff he ran out the doors and reached his car. his mind running miles per hour. questions filling his head up to a level where it was hard to breathe.

reaching there he grimaced as the smell of countless death and sterile filled his senses.

"are you Mr. Oikawa?" the voice came up from behind as he was filling up his entry at the reception. whipping his head back he met a man, much older than him, in white coat who looked concerned and... sorry?

"yes. yes i am. what happened?!" he trailed behind the doctor like any lost puppy would do with a stranger who was friendly enough to pet it only to get kicked in the guts.

the doctor stopped after few rooms passed. sighing he removed his glasses and hung them over his chest pockets giving it a company with two pens that were sitting comfortably in it. "he is, uh, critical. he used to come here for treatment due to his frequent headaches. today was different. he collapsed while we were going through some tests. looking into it, there are multiple organ failure right now. not much is left for him." it felt like the world has come to an end. the floor beneath hem felt like it had moved, eating him alive.

pushing past the doctor he entered the room. eyes blowing up at the view he was welcomed to. a man, so strong and healthy, tied to all sorts of machines, a tube, a mere fucking tube, helping him breathe.

"Ha- Hajime...." he could only whisper out softly. but only to response.

he looked so pale, so lifeless, his heart barely even doing its only job. it was cold to touch him, the normal warmth was not there anymore. even after trying to warm up his hand he couldn't bring the missing warmth back again. not anymore.

"please- please tell me what happened.."

there was a heavy silent. a deafening one. nothing was audible other than the faint beeps and slowed breathing of the man on the cold bed of the hospital.

he was not going to leave like this. he is not that pathetic and weak to just die on his lover. not before he could tell him he loved him and he always will. no matter what.

but?

he can't speak.

now what? love is something that doesn't need to be conveyed through words.

his cold thumb brushed over the warm knuckles of the man standing beside him. he looked like he was falling apart. oikawa's brown warm gaze widened as he looked down at iwaizumi. he looked like he was taking his last breath. he looked like he was ready to start a new journey. he looked happy. his eyes showed nothing but love. it kept showing love as his eyes dilated and stilled. the touch still reflected love even if it went limp and cold.┊

another sob. then another and another and another. he sobbed there. curling into himself. all the tears tasted like guilt and regret. none of them were salty.

"why did you tell the doc to not tell me about the disease???" he cried out. his lungs burned. they begged him to breathe but he couldn't.

regrets were there. guilt was there.

"i am sorry i was so selfish."

he thought he could be free of them. he was tied down. forever. no matter what.

maybe if he loved him properly. maybe if he loved him the way he deserved.

maybe if he loved the man named Iwaizumi Hajime.

too late.

[buckysforeverprincess]

Winter Wonderland-Christmas

Steve Rogers x Reader

Words: 1185

Warning: So much fluff and happiness!

A/N: Merry Christmas!!! As promised, the update is a lot earlier so I hope you enjoy it! This one is a lot longer than the others because there was a lot to pack in and it was a special moment between our favorite couple, as you can tell by my edit, they are having a great day! Hope you enjoy today’s installment and a shorter update will be back tomorrow. Enjoy your day, everyone!!!

“Morning, my love,” you kiss a sleepy Steve whose eyes are slowly starting to open. “Merry Christmas.”

“Mmm…,” Steve rolls over and wraps you in his arms. “Merry Christmas, my beautiful wife. Sleep well?”

“Always when I’m next to you. You ready to get up and start the day?” You ask, as levelheaded as possible, wanting to give nothing away even though you’re already excited for the gift exchange.

“I’ll get the coffee started.”

Twenty minutes later you and Steve are seated in front of the tree, coffee in hand, gazing at all the gifts encircling it.

“We did good this year,” he comments and grabs a present, sliding it over to you.

“That we did,” you reply and hand him a gift from you. “Let’s get started but save that box for last,” you point to the one that holds his extra special gift.

“Okay, ‘cause I have a special one for you too,” he winks and the two of you begin opening presents one after the other.

“Thank you so much! I loved every single one of them,” you kiss Steve’s lips softly. You were both surrounded by lots of opened gifts, the living room a mess of torn wrapping paper.

“There’s two left.”

You look around the tree and only see the one present you have for your husband.

“I only see one,” your brows furrow in confusion.

“Come with me,” Steve stands and holds out his hand. You take it and he helps you up, leading you over to the door. He hands you your coat and opens the door, guiding you outside. “Close your eyes,” he says as you’re about to turn the corner to the garage.

Doing as asked, you close your eyes and Steve places his hands on your shoulder, slowly moving you through the snow. He comes to a stop and you can feel him wrap his arms around you from behind, his breath tickling the back of your neck.

“Okay… open them.”

You open your eyes and immediately go into a state of shock.

“Merry Christmas, baby!” Steve says in your ear and kisses your cheek.

“Oh, Steve…,”

Sitting in the driveway is a white 2020 Land Rover Discovery. The same vehicle you had fallen in love with when you went to the dealership at the end of November to have some work done on Steve’s older Land Rover. You mentioned to Steve that it’d be nice to have a new one but had no idea he would actually entertain the idea, but he had. This was such an amazing gift and you couldn’t believe this was happening to you.

“Holy shit, Steve!! I love it!!” You turn around and wrap your arms around his neck, jumping up into his arms.

“I knew you would! I love you, beautiful. Thanks for putting up with me for all these years and the hell of being the wife of a Special Ops Captain. I know that’s not easy and I appreciate you so much,” Steve says with some raw emotion and you could swear he’s crying.

You break the hug and kiss him passionately on the lips. Even in the cold, it makes your body all warm. Nothing is better than being wrapped up in the man you love.

“Wanna take it for a drive?” Steve asks, holding out the keys in his hand.

Smiling brightly, you begin to nod and then shake your head, “No! I mean, yes! But I have something for you! Come back inside!” You grab his hand and quickly drag him back into the house.

Once inside, you throw off your coat and head to the tree, picking up the gift and moving to the couch, motioning for Steve to come and join you. With a smile, he sits next to you on the couch, waiting for you to hand him the present in your hand.

Inhaling deeply, you place the gift in his lap and bite at your lip. Steve shrugs and begins to open it excitedly but pauses when he removes the lid of the box.

“What the…,” Steve trails off and picks up the picture the two of you took on Santa’s lap. In it, Steve is all smiles as the camera captures the moment. However, the man donning the red suit has his finger over his mouth in a “shhh…,” motion, his other arm around you and pointing to your belly, where your hands are placed signaling a heart. Steve was clueless to what was happening, and you were so thankful Santa was happy to go along with your planned surprise.

Steve looks up from the box, his blue eyes begin to tear up. “Is this… are we?”

“There’s more.”

He looks back into the box and takes out the next item, a chalkboard baby announcement.

“Our family is growing by two little feet and one heartbeat. Baby Rogers coming 2021, oh my god!” He exclaims, happy tears falling down his face.

“Merry Christmas, Daddy,” your hands are gently placed on your stomach.

Steve sets the items down and wraps you up in a hug. “This is for real, right?! We’re having a baby?!” He says against your neck.

“We’re having a baby!”

Steve pulls back and kisses you then slides off the couch, kneeling in front of you and starts to kiss your belly. “I can’t believe it! Daddy can’t wait to meet you!” He continues to pepper your stomach with kisses.

“Well, you got a way to go, we’re only ten weeks right now. Baby is due July twenty third.”

Steve looks up at you, a smile never leaving his face. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?!” Still excited from the news.

You reach down and cup his face with your hand. “Because I needed to be sure. We’ve been trying for so long without success and many negative pregnancy tests, I needed to be positive we were absolutely pregnant before I got your hopes up.”

“Thank you…,” Steve comes up and meets your lips in a kiss, “...you really are an amazing wife and are gonna make the best mom ever!”

“Did you see the onesie?”

Steve shakes his head and you grab it out of the box, holding it up for him.

“Oh, that’s adorable but it won’t fit me! I plan on telling everyone we’re expecting!” Steve takes it and pulls it close to his body in a hug. “Is that why you were looking at the Land Rover?”

You chuckle. “Yes. I thought it’d be nice to have a new vehicle… something more family like that I can drive, and since you love yours, I thought I might like to have my own.”

“I think everything worked out perfectly. Merry Christmas, my love,” he kisses you again softly and then kisses your stomach.

“And Merry Christmas to our little miracle.”

“Our Christmas miracle,” Steve says into your stomach. “Daddy already loves you and can’t wait to meet you this summer. This is the best Christmas ever!”

“Every Christmas with you is the best.”

Steve nods. “Coming next year… Baby’s first Christmas!” 👶🏻🎄

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[purpletaeger]

This Berluti outfit is part of the brand’s 2020 Spring/Summer Menswear Collection.

V turned the red carpet into his own personal runway when he wore this outfit to SBS‘s Gayo Daejeon in 2019.

This outfit from CELINE‘s Spring/Summer 2020 Menswear Collection by Heidi Slimane.

V wore it on the red carpet at the 2019 Mnet Asian Music Awards (MAMA).

2019 Fall/Winter collection, PRADA brought vampire aesthetics to the runway.

V turned heads when he wore this outfit over a crisp, white button-up at the 2019 Melon Music Awards (MMA).

Givenchy‘s daring look from the 2020 Fall/Winter Menswear Collection isn’t for shy fashionistas but it was perfect for V! He wasn’t afraid to stand out during BTS’s photoshoot for DICON magazine.

V achieved the near-impossible when he pulled off this look from GUCCI‘s 2021 Spring/Summer collection for BTS’s 2021 Season’s Greetings package. V transformed into a ’70s heartthrob by ditching the suit jacket and tie and adding his own personal flair.

GUCCI’s Pre-Fall Menswear Collection

It’s easy to see why V made headlines when he danced in his suit!

<s.Koreaboo>

𝐊𝐢𝐦 𝐓𝐚𝐞𝐡𝐲𝐮𝐧𝐠

방탄소년단 뷔