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Tano and Kenobi: Tatooine

Previously on Tano and Kenobi...

Desperately fleeing the relentless pursuit of the bounty hunters sent by Culling Blade, Ahsoka Tano and Obi-Wan Kenobi have fled with the Duchess of Mandalore, Satine Kryze, across the Outer Rim. Out of time and with nowhere else to run, Ahsoka makes a bold decision to trade their starship for passage on a freighter.

A freighter bound for the desert planet of Tatooine.

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Melausta on the Outer Rim.

A Republic cruiser flew through the atmosphere, smoothly gliding over the spaceport of the planet’s capital city.

Hovering in place for a moment as the landing gear deployed, the vermillion ship slowly sank down into its assigned landing bay. White, billowing clouds of steam jetted out of the ship’s exhaust vents, nearly obscuring the boarding ramp that was quickly lowered.

A humanoid figure strode out, hard-soled boots ringing against the duracrete walls of the landing bay. He stepped into the warm midday sunlight and pulled off the voluminous hood that covered his brown hair and blunt features. Taking out his personal communications device, the man keyed in a frequency. “This is Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn and I have landed on Melausta.”

There were several minutes of silence as the message bounced through the express relays of the holonet system before the reply came back.

“Understood, Master Jinn,” Mace Windu’s voice crackled over the com, low and serious. “Please inform the Temple when you have located the Duchess of Mandalore, Knight Tano, and Padawan Kenobi. May the Force be with you. Windu out.”

The line went dead and Qui-Gon tucked his com back into his belt and took off into the bustling city with one thing on his mind.

I’m coming, Obi-Wan.

Three days later it became clear that while Obi-Wan, Knight Tano, and the Duchess had been in the capital city of Melausta, they were no longer there and most likely hadn’t been there for two weeks, maybe more. The local magistrate helpfully explained that there had been a bit of a scuffle with some Mandalorian bounty hunters about three weeks back but no one had been able to charge them with anything more onerous than disturbing the peace.

“Some of those boys work for Jabba and the Hutt Syndicate,” the magistrate explained, showing Qui-Gon the footage of the fracas in the market district. “So there wasn’t a lot of push from the judiciary to indict them. And nobody’s seen a Jedi on Melausta in years! Truth be told, the Hutts are the law out here, Master Jedi.”

Qui-Gon frowned at the holo footage with his arms folded over his chest. “The citizens of this planet are content to let known criminals and bounty hunters walk free on their streets?”

“You’re mighty far away from Coruscant, Master Jedi,” the magistrate shrugged, pulling out a data stick and handing it over to Qui-Gon. “People here are just glad they won’t be kidnapped and sold into slavery on Nar Shaddaa. I’m sorry we can’t be of more help to you.”

Qui-Gon took the data stick with a brusque gesture and thanked the local law enforcement officer for his help before marching out of the building and back to his ship.

He would use the onboard computer to process the data stick in the hopes of finding some clue to Obi-Wan’s whereabouts. The footage was the only real lead he had, what with the Force silent and still on the subject of the boy. No matter how deeply he meditated, nothing seemed to spark in his awareness and there was a growing, cold dread in his heart that he would find him too late.

I knew Tano would lead you into danger, Obi-Wan. I only hope I can find you before she carelessly gets you hurt.

Two days later, he still had not found anything that would help.

“And you’re positive there’s nothing?” Qui-Gon frowned at the hologram of Master Jocasta Nu hovering above his ship’s onboard holoprojector. “Nothing at all?”

“I’m sorry, Qui-Gon,” Master Nu shook her head, frowning. “I have been over the footage twice myself, as have Masters Plo and Windu. Knight Tano and Padawan Kenobi are nowhere to be found. The droid analysis reports the same finding.”

“But there has to be something there!” Qui-Gon insisted, leaning back in his chair and folding his arms over his chest. “They couldn’t have just vanished!”

“All we can do is trust in the Force and wait for them to contact us,” Master Windu said, his face appearing in the flickering blue light of the projector. “I understand your concerns, Qui-Gon, but the Senate has an assignment for you and I cannot put it off any longer. You must return to Coruscant. Another Jedi will take over the search for Knight Tano and Padawan Kenobi.”

Qui-Gon grit his teeth and bowed his head to Master Windu, the Master of the Order. “Yes, Master Windu. I understand. Who will be taking over the search in my absence?”

“Master Tinn is on his way as we speak,” Mace said, hoping that the mention of a sitting member of the Council being dispatched to find two lost Jedi would sooth Jinn’s hackles. “We are all worried about Ahsoka and Obi-Wan, but you are needed here, Qui-Gon. Once we have located them and assured the Duchess’s safety, you will be the first person I call.”

Nodding, Qui-Gon bowed to the hologram. “Thank you, Master Windu. I will depart shortly.”

And with that he cut off the feed to the Temple and let out a particularly florid curse in Bacchi. He rested his hands on the communications console in his ship, unable to help calling out into the Force. Where are you, Obi-Wan?

To say that Tatooine was hot would not do it proper justice.

Obi-Wan couldn’t really think of a word that could do the desert planet on the Outer Rim justice but “hot” just didn’t seem up to the task. He liked “blistering” or “scorching” but they didn’t quite encompass the blinding, searing light of the twin suns of Tatoo 1 and Tatoo 2. While the length of the day was similar to that of Coruscant with only a few extra hours of sunlight added, those hours seemed brutally exhausting and cruel to Obi-Wan, who just wanted some peace from the heat and the stark brightness overhead.

And that didn’t even begin to cover what all this sun and ultraviolet radiation was doing to his skin. If he got out of this mess without third degree burns, he told himself, he would consider it a miracle.

“Thank you for letting me borrow your robe, Ben,” Satine murmured from where she stood next to him as they waited for Ahsoka to emerge from the cantina she had stepped into looking for information. If there was any consolation to Obi-Wan’s suffering on Tatooine, it was that he had spared Satine further misery, like a true Jedi Knight.

“You are more than welcome, S-Satine.” Obi-Wan stumbled over the Duchess’ given name, feeling scandalously informal. They had decided on the flight to Tatooine that it would be dangerous to refer to Satine by her titles and Obi-Wan had spent most of the flight stammering over her name and feeling even more like an idiot than he usually did.

Ahsoka finally had to step in and suggest with a smile, “You could always call her ‘my lady’. Then you’re still being respectful but a stranger might simply think you’re being extra romantic with your girlfriend.”

Satine had been in the refresher at the time and so Obi-Wan felt free to hiss at his master. “The Duchess is not my girlfriend, Master! I am a Jedi and she is the leader of the Mandalorian people! A relationship between us is impossible and against the Jedi Code!”

Ahsoka nodded solemnly at her padawan’s observation. “I agree. Those are all very good reasons why Satine should not be your girlfriend.”

Obi-Wan watched Ahsoka out of the corner of his narrowed eyes. “I sense a ‘but’ is coming, Master, and I do not think I am going to like it.”

“But if you do decide to make a go of it, I support you,” Ahsoka grinned, pulling out some ration bars and offering one to Obi-Wan who refused in a mortified huff. “Satine is a lovely young woman and I don’t think you could do better than the ruler of a planet.”

“Master!” Obi-Wan groaned, covering his hands and wishing they were on a planet so he could beg the Force to open up a bottomless pit and swallow him whole.

In the end, Obi-Wan chose to stumble his way through Satine’s name in the interest of her safety and also because a small part of him was secretly thrilled at the prospect at being allowed to cast aside his propriety for the mission.

But only for the mission. Once they were safely back on Coruscant, Obi-Wan was fully prepared to go back to using the proper and more respectful “Your Grace”.

Still, it is nice to call her by her name, Obi-Wan thought.

“Who in their right mind thought it was a good idea to colonize this hellish planet?” Satine grumbled, pulling the hood of Obi-Wan’s robes further down to give herself more shade. “And why haven’t they built any kind of protection from the suns? Mandalore is a desert now but we don’t live exposed to elements like this. It’s barbaric!”

Obi-Wan chuckled softly and rummaged around in his go bag lying slung over one shoulder. He pulled out a small metal canister filled with cool water that Ahsoka had given him earlier that morning.

They each had one and he knew for a fact that Satine had already gone through hers. “Thirsty?”

Satine let out a gasp of delight and took the canister and was unscrewing the cap when she stopped and turned to look at Obi-Wan, her brows furrowed and her expression worried. “Were you just going to let me drink all your water without saying anything?”

Obi-Wan flushed, which was hard to see under his sunburn, and looked away. “I… thought something cool might take your mind off this sandy hellscape we find ourselves in.”

“Ben Kenobi!” Satine said, looking horrified as she reached out to give Obi-Wan a good swat on the arm. “You… you… stupid boy! Take your water back! I will not be responsible for your death by dehydration.”

Obi-Wan took the drink canister back from Satine and tucked it back into his bag with a guilty relief. “Thank you, Satine. I shall endeavor not to expire today.”

Satine nodded, mollified. “Good. I should hate to have to explain that to Master Ahsoka.”

“Explain what to me?” Ahsoka asked as she emerged from the cantina, a smile on her face as she tucked a handful of credits into a pouch on her hip. “What did I miss?”

Obi-Wan was going to explain his chivalrous actions but Satine got to them first. “Ben was going to gallantly give me the last of his water because I was childishly complaining about this accursed heat,” Satine announced, her head high. “And I made him take it back as I do not relish the idea of him dying from dehydration or the having to explain his untimely demise.”

Ahsoka blinked in confusion, her gaze jumping from Obi-Wan to Satine and back again as she arched one brow. “Right. Well, the good news is, I’ve got enough money for an early dinner. Bad news is, there’s a big podrace coming up and there’s no place to stay.”

Pulling her hood up over her montrals, Ahsoka moved forward into the busy central thoroughfare of Mos Espa with Obi-Wan and Satine at her side. Since it was the main artery of traffic and business in the city, the street was lined by stalls and shops, each one selling something different and the merchants calling out in a wide variety of languages but predominantly in Huttese.

Satine stayed close to Obi-Wan’s side as they walked, asking softly what different sellers were saying, and he happily translated for her. They passed a stand selling exotic food from as far away as Corellia and one stand that offered what it was calling traditional Mandalorian “Fire Food” once Obi-Wan translated it back into Basic.

“Oh! It’s trac’lo’ras!” Satine smiled as she drifted over to the stall. “It smells heavenly.”

Ahsoka followed Obi-Wan over to Satine and the Jedi agreed that the skewers of spiced meat looked and smelled divine. She fished out the credits necessary for two skewers and handed them over to the seller, who bowed his head in thanks and said something in a language she wasn’t very familiar with.

Continuing on their way, Satine let out a happy sigh at the little piece of home. “Oh this is delicious! When I was younger and my mother would take me to the market, she would always buy one and share it with me.”

“Master, would you like the rest of mine?” Obi-Wan offered, having eaten about a third of his skewer and unwilling to let Ahsoka starve if he could help it. “It’s quite good but I’m not sure I should put so much on my stomach with all this heat.”

Smiling back at her padawan, Ahsoka took the offered food. “Thank you, Obi-Wan.”

You won’t be too hungry? she thought as they stepped out of the way of an oncoming landspeeder. And why is Satine wearing your robe?

Obi-Wan glanced up at Ahsoka and bit his lower lip. I… I wanted to protect her from the sun.

Obi-Wan! Ahsoka shook her head and pulled off her robe, with a swirl and draped it over Obi-Wan’s shoulders. “There. That’s better.”

“But what about you?” Obi-Wan protested but allowed his master to pull the hood up and hide him in its shadows anyway. She could sense his relief in the Force, cool and sweet.

“I’ll be fine,” Ahsoka promised as they came to a stop at the corner of another street, watching the ambling, colorful crowd of Outer Rim civilization pass them by.

Ducking under a nearby awning, it was startling to see how much a difference simple shade made in the omnipresent heat and blinding haze of the Tatooine sunlight. Ahsoka hadn’t really understood her master’s hatred of his home planet, but she was starting to get an inkling.

The three of them paused under the protective shade of a droid merchant’s shop as they watched the chaotic swirl of Mos Espa pass them by. Beings from all corners of the galaxy were there but it was easy to tell the natives from the visitors.

People from off-planet had a faint pink softness about them as their bodies began to adjust to the relentless heat and dryness. They were the ones throwing back expensive canisters of water and dousing themselves or their necks in an attempt to beat the heat at its own game and they left far too much delicate skin bared to the elements.

The natives were the ones covered up in the light colors of sand and dunes, their skin dark, faces sharp and in some, prematurely aged. They stuck to the shade as much as they could, their loose robes flowing and allowing what breeze there was to help stave off the heat.

The Force seemed particularly riotous on Tatooine, as if the sheer variety of people and purposes gave a new dimension to it that Ahsoka had rarely experienced and Obi-Wan had never felt before.

“Are you gonna buy something or just take up space?” the owner of the stall muttered as he stepped out from the cool shadows of his shop. “I’m not running an inn!”

Ahsoka held up her hands and gestured for Obi-Wan and Satine to move on ahead of her. “My apologies, friend. We’ll be on our way.”

“Lazy off-worlders,” the man grumbled, shuffling back inside. “Bunch of no-goods and gamblers making everything a mess for the Boonta.”

Frowning, Ahsoka hurried to catch up to Satine and Obi-Wan, who were now standing on the side of the road watching something up ahead.

When she stepped up next to her padawan she saw what had frozen the two teens in place.

A Nikto and a Weequay were laughing loudly as they stood on either side of a young human woman who was holding a package close to her chest and trying to get away from them. There was a growing circle of space around the trio as people backed away from the scene of the young woman and her harassers, who were picking at the braids in her hair and the protective cloak she was wearing.

“Sarela! Did you boss give you the day off?” The Weequay grinned as he leaned in closer. “You should come spend it with me! I’ll take real good care of you.”

“Don’t listen to that chuta!” The Nikto sneered, wrapping an arm around the girl as he tried to guide her away from the front of the large shop she was trying to purchase goods in. “Everybody knows Trazz is all talk and no meat if you catch my drift!”

“Let go of me!” the girl shouted, trying to break free. “Get your hands off of me!”

There were mutters from the crowd around Ahsoka, whispers about how “Someone should do something,” and then replies of “Won’t matter. They’re Gardulla’s men. Nobody messes with Gardulla.” Anger, frustration, and defeated resignation colored the Force around them.

Obi-Wan seethed at the sight and Ahsoka found it hard to disagree with him. He looked up at his master, his expression pleading for permission to go break a few bones to protect the young woman being accosted.

Minutely shaking her head, Ahsoka reluctantly tried to lead Obi-Wan and Satine past the thickest part of the crowd.

We can’t put Satine in danger like that. If we act, her identity might be revealed and I really don’t like our chances on Tatooine of all places, Ahsoka explained to Obi-Wan, who bristled with outrage as he followed his master, his jaw clenched.

“Yes, Master,” Obi-Wan managed to grind out, trying to guide the Duchess through the crowd. “We’re going, Satine.”

“We can’t!” Satine hissed, keeping her voice low as they struggled through the crowd mesmerized by the ongoing scene. “We can’t let those brutes hurt that poor woman!”

“Master says we cannot risk the danger of exposing you,” Obi-Wan explained, even as he struggled to accept his master’s logic. While he knew it made the most sense and would keep the three of them out of danger, it went against the very fiber of his being, of the Jedi Code and his own morals and what made it even worse was that he could sense his master hating her decision just as much as he did.

“But.. but that’s wrong,” Satine said, looking back at the poor girl. “What if something happens to her?”

Ahsoka closed her eyes and tried to tell herself that she was doing the right thing. That it was more important to keep Satine and Obi-Wan safe.

“Maybe we’re just not being convincing enough,” the Nikto sneered as he patted the blaster on his hip as his friend snickered at his side. “Now why don’t you come with us, Sarela. Me and Trazz just wanna show you a good time. What’s wrong with that?”

“Be a good girl and we won’t tell Gardulla that your folks are behind on their water taxes,” the other thug said, picking up on his buddy’s odious suggestion. “If you’re really nice to us, we’ll forget all about ‘em for a while.”

“No! Please! Let me go!” Sarela pleaded, as the crowd started to disperse, already knowing the endgame of this little overt display of bullying. Things like this happened every day in Mos Espa and all over Tatooine and sometimes it was just better to turn your head and accept it than hope for something more. Something better.

Ahsoka closed her eyes and took a deep breath. I can’t let this go.

“You know, I don’t think she wants to go anywhere with you,” she called out, the crowd quickly pulling away like the tide rolling out. “In fact, I think you two should leave the girl alone and go about your business.”

The thugs turned slowly to stare at Ahsoka in a kind of dumb-struck, bug-eyed shock. “What did you say?” the Nikto asked.

“I said, you should leave her alone,” Ahsoka replied, striding out toward the men, her head held high, her gaze calm and level and her hands loose at her side. She could feel Obi-Wan’s fierce pride radiating in the Force and Satine’s relief, weaker but still there. She was glad to know that they were all agreed that there were just some things they couldn’t ignore.

“And who the hell are you?” the Nikto spat, jabbing a finger at Ahsoka’s chest.

Ahsoka canted her head ever so slightly and smiled. “A concerned citizen. Now I suggest you and your friend leave... Sarela? It’s Sarela, right?”

The girl nodded, her eyes round in surprise.

“Good,” Ahsoka’s gaze never left the two thugs. “I suggest you and your friend leave Sarela alone.”

“Are you gonna make us?” the other man sneered, arms folded over his chest. “Sarela’s a real good friend of ours, aren’t ya?”

“I d-don’t want any t-trouble,” the girl stammered, looking frantically from Ahsoka to Gardulla’s men. “P-please! I just… I just want… to go home.”

Ahsoka glanced at Sarela, at the panic taking over her spirit, and her lips pulled into a thin line. “You heard her, gentlemen. Let Sarela go home.”

“Kark you, you headtailed bitch!” The Nikto snarled and lashed out with a fist, no doubt hoping to catch Ahsoka by surprise. The crowd, drawn back by Ahsoka’s actions, let out a gasp.

“What the hell?” The Weequay stammered as Ahsoka stood there, as solid as the rocky bluffs of the wastes, her blue eyes bright with anger and the Nikto’s fist caught neatly in her hand. “No way! There’s no karking way!”

The Nikto let out another curse as Ahsoka used his fist and his arm to unbalance him and fling him to the ground. “My arm! That bitch broke my arm!” he howled in pain.

“You’ll live,” Ahsoka sniffed and looked at the Weequay still standing in front of her.

She could feel Obi-Wan’s spirit shifting through the Force to whisper to Sarela, telling her without words to slip into the crowd and run away back to her family, which she did.

“Do you want to try your luck too, friend?” she asked the Weequay.

Enraged this strange woman was making a mockery of him and his buddy, the Weequay pulled out a knife and lashed out at Ahsoka in a wide arc.

She dodged it easily, hopping backwards as the thug advanced. His eyes were wide as he stared at her, caught somewhere between fury and fear. She could tell that he didn’t really want to be in this fight but he couldn’t let the challenge to him and his friend stand. Not when Ahsoka had humiliated them in public like that.

No one would ever respect them again if word got out about this.

He advanced with wild swings, once, twice, and then a third before Ahsoka blocked his right arm with her left, twisted it over and around, pinning it against her side.

The Weequay cried out in pain and dropped his knife.

With her opponent’s torso exposed, Ahsoka pummeled him with a few hits to the guts before she gave him a proper upper cut and let him fall over backward to lie gasping on the ground as he spat red blood into the dust.

Ahsoka stared down at the thugs, her blue eyes brighter than the sky overhead. “Go back to your boss. And never bother that girl again. Do you understand me?”

Compulsion was laced thick through her words, and the Nikto and the Weequay slowly shambled upright and stumbled back into the crowd, muttering to themselves as the curious onlookers dispersed and normalcy resumed.

Ahsoka let the crowd surge up around and past her, letting it carry Obi-Wan and Satine over to her side. She looked at them and gave them a half smile at Obi-Wan’s approving nod and Satine’s relieved and proud grin.

“That was truly amazing, Master Tano,” Satine said as she followed Ahsoka and Obi-Wan back to the edge of the street and the fringes of the crowd. “Those ruffians will certainly think twice about accosting any more innocent people after that.”

“I just hope Sarela is alright,” Ahsoka said as she slid past a large Ithorian arguing with a Rodian about a speeder part as if the entire encounter hadn’t even happened.

Every one had short memories on Tatooine.

“And I think it would be a good idea if we could find a place to stay for the night. Especially after what just happened. I don’t want those idiots to come back looking for us with more friends and even more weapons.”

“But where can we stay?” Obi-Wan asked, following his master and keeping Satine close to his side. “We haven’t enough credits for an inn and we don’t have a ship anymore.”

Ahsoka let out a sigh and came to a stop between two shops, one selling off-world fruits and vegetables and the other selling a variety of alcohol from all around the Outer Rim. She pulled Obi-Wan and Satine close as they started to discuss what they were going to do about lodgings.

“I’m sure there’s some place we can stay,” Ahsoka assured her padawan and the Duchess. “Mos Espa is big enough to have a place that we can afford somewhere and then tomorrow we can see about earning some credits to get us off this planet.”

“Perhaps we could try one of the inns near the spaceport?” Satine suggested. “I thought one of them said the nightly rent was ten credits for a room. I would be happy to sleep on the floor if it would save us money.”

“You don’t want to do that,” an accented, feminine voice interrupted their conversation, carried on the faintest breeze. “That’s where the night flowers work.”

Ahsoka looked back over her shoulder at the owner of the voice, a petite woman with dark hair coiled into a thick braid at the base of her neck. She was inside the produce stall, picking out some brightly colored sunset fruits from Corellia and setting them into a basket that was covered with a bright green cloth.

Reaching out to the Force on instinct, Ahsoka found it was silent but warm and reassuring to her senses. “Thank you, my friend. If you don’t mind me asking, is there a place you would recommend we stay?”

“What’s a night flower?” Satine asked Obi-Wan, who leaned over and whispered the explanation in her ear. She let out a gasp and turned bright red, slapping a hand over her mouth.

The woman smiled at the fruit in her hand and looked up at Ahsoka, her expression exhausted but her dark eyes kind. “Not if you’re considering the Night Flower Garden. Do you have no money?”

Ahsoka shook her head. “No. We… we didn’t plan on coming to Tatooine.”

The woman nodded, a sad smile tugging at the corner of her lips. “Most people don’t. What is your name?”

“Ahsoka. This is Obi-Wan and her name is Satine.”

Obi-Wan bowed and Satine gave a little curtsey as they chorused, “Hello.”

“Are they… your children?” the woman asked, her brows puzzled as she put the last of her shopping in the basket. She pulled a tan scarf up over her head and tossed the loose edge over her shoulder, the warmth in the Force leaving with her as she moved away.

“I protect them,” Ahsoka explained, watching the other woman as she walked up to the shop keeper and pulled back the cloth that was covering the food, handing over a few credits after he gave her the total.

“Give Gardulla my best,” the merchant said as the woman stepped out onto the street and gave Ahsoka a long look before beckoning her to follow.

They moved down the street, the woman a few feet ahead of them, weaving in and out of the crowd, gliding past clutches of people. She came to the end of the busier section of the main road and waited for Ahsoka, Obi-Wan and Satine to catch up.

“I saw what you did for Sarela,” the woman said, holding a hand up by her mouth, her words soft. “I saw you stand up to Gardulla’s thugs. I haven’t seen anyone stand up to my master’s men in a long time.”

“Your master?” Satine echoed, her eyes growing wide with a dawning realization. “Oh no!”

The woman glanced at Satine but did not reply as she moved ahead, looking Ahsoka up and down. “You are right. You will need to stay out of sight. You are very distinctive, even for a mercenary.”

“My master’s not a mercenary,” Obi-Wan tried to explain, reaching for his lightsabers when Ahsoka stopped him.

Mercenary works for now, Obi-Wan. Let’s not blow our cover just yet.

“Well, whatever she is, she needs to hide and you do too,” the woman explained, giving Obi-Wan and Satine a look as she folded her arms over her chest. “Your accents make you exotic here and exotic things do not stay free for long on Tatooine. You may stay with me and my son. It is the least I can do after what you did for Sarela.”

“We couldn’t,” Ahsoka said, sensing the anxiety and tension coming off of the woman in heavy, swamping waves. What she was offering was clearly going to put her and her son at risk and Ahsoka didn’t want to put anymore lives in danger than she absolutely had to. “I’m sure we’ll find some other place to stay.”

“You won’t,” the woman insisted, shaking her head. “We don’t get many Togruta off-worlders, let alone females capable of taking down two of Gardulla’s men. Word will get around fast. You’ll be safer in the slave quarters.”

“The slave quarters?” Ahsoka echoed, the Force louder now in the back of her mind, urging her to follow the woman, to accept her offer. “You’re a slave?”

“Yes,” the woman explained and stepped out into the sunlight. “Gardulla is my master. My name is Shmi.”

Shmi. Her name is Shmi and she has a son.

“My mother’s name was Shmi,” Anakin said one night of a long forgotten siege as they had stared up at the stars overhead. “And I know she would have liked you, Snips.”

Ahsoka froze, her heart suddenly pounding in her chest as Obi-Wan and Satine almost ran into her.

Her mind went blank.

She struggled for something to say, what to think about this sudden revelation that Anakin’s mother was there, right in front of her. That their long, hard flight from Mandalore had taken them to right where they needed to be.

“Master?” Obi-Wan murmured, reaching out to touch the back of Ahsoka’s arm, his spirit brushing hers, warm and golden with concern. “Are you alright?”

Shmi came to a stop in the middle of the road and looked back at them, confused. “Ahsoka? Are you coming?”

You coming or not, Snips? A warm memory of a voice thought long lost broke through the stunned white noise of Ahsoka’s mind, bringing with it a wave of joy, relief, and the sudden terrified realization that she was about to change the future irrevocably.

There was no going back.

Everything was going to change and it was going to be her responsibility to see that it was for the better.

Why are you here, if not to change things? The Presence whispered in the back of Ahsoka’s mind. Don’t be afraid. You won’t be alone. Obi-Wan is with you. This is as much his destiny as it is yours.

Ahsoka looked down at Obi-Wan, his furrowed brows and his worry radiating out into the Force, that was swirling around them both like a river about to burst over its banks. He had no idea what was about to happen, who they were about to meet, and how his life was going to change. Ahsoka wanted to pull him into a hug right then and there and shout, “It’s him! We found him! Your padawan and my master. We found Anakin! And we’ll save him this time. We won’t lose him.”

And then it felt like a knife in her heart that she couldn’t tell him, that she couldn’t share just how important and momentous this was.

“Master Tano?” Satine murmured, stepping up next to Obi-Wan. “Mother Skywalker is telling us to follow her.”

Ahsoka shook herself out of her thoughts and looked up at Shmi, whose dark eyes were narrowed in suspicion. “I’m sorry. I think the sun is getting to me.”

Shmi shook her head and continued on. “Then we need to get you inside. Come on.”

Shmi told Ahsoka, Obi-Wan, and Satine to wait in an alleyway around the corner from Gardulla’s palace on the edge of Mos Espa. She had to drop off the shopping she had done for the Hutt’s kitchen before she went home for the day.

“You don’t stay in the palace?” Satine asked, puzzled because while her family’s servants and retainers stayed within the Kryze compound, she couldn’t imagine a Hutt allowing their slaves to wander free.

Shmi shook her head with the studied patience of one who had explained this many times before. “No. I have a tracker chip embedded within me so I couldn’t run away even if I stole a ship. The minute I try to leave the atmosphere, the chip detonates, opening an artery or injecting a poison. I don’t know which. The ones who are poisoned, they call them ‘dancers’ because of the seizures the poison causes.”

Satine let out a horrified gasp. “That’s barbaric.”

“That is how it is out here,” Shmi explained, her eyes soft as she reached out to squeeze the young girl’s shoulder. “There is no slavery on your world, is there? This must be hard for you to hear.”

Satine shook her head fiercely. “There should not be slavery anywhere.”

Shmi chuckled softly. “You will get no argument out of me on that topic. Stay here while I take this to the cook. I should be back shortly.”

Ahsoka, Obi-Wan and Satine watched her go, waiting for her to pass out of sight before speaking again, voices quiet and hushed.

“We have to save her,” Satine insisted, her cheeks flushed and eyes bright. “This is wrong! Putting an explosive chip in someone and violating their civil liberties! It’s abhorrent.”

“But we haven’t any credits,” Obi-Wan said, his arms folded over his chest and one hand in front of his mouth as he chewed on his thumbnail. “And we still need to find a way off this planet and back to Coruscant.”

“Perhaps we could barter for something,” Satine suggested as Ahsoka leaned back up against the wall and stared off into the distance, her mind whirling with thoughts and possibilities, different futures unspooling before her like bolts of fabric flung out into a river to wash downstream with the current. “Do we have anything we could sell?”

“Nothing that will free Shmi and get all four of us back to Coruscant,” Obi-Wan said, peering at the bag he had been carrying all day. “It’s mostly Master’s datapads and a few emergency rations and a medkit. Nothing that will fetch us any decent money.”

Satine groaned, rubbing her temples. “If only I could contact my uncle. If he’s found the informant, we could have the money wired here and leave in two days’ time.”

“That is a lovely thought, Satine, but we can’t risk it,” Obi-Wan said, his voice kind but brooking no argument. “I’m sure we’ll think of something. Don’t you agree, Master?”

Obi-Wan’s words startled Ahsoka out of her meditations and she turned to look at the two teenagers next to her. “I’m sorry. I was lost in thought. And there’s five of us. Shmi has a son, remember?”

“Oh, right,” Obi-Wan nodded. “I forgot about him. How old is he?”

“I’m not sure,” Ahsoka shrugged as the Force alerted her to Shmi’s return. “Here she comes!”

Shmi came around the corner and walked down the alleyway to them, pulling her scarf up over her hair. “I hope I didn’t make you wait too long. The taskmaster didn’t want to let me leave early.”

“Did we get you in trouble?” Ahsoka asked as they fell in line behind Shmi, who led them across another wide road before heading into a alleyway between two older buildings.

“No, no!” Shmi said, waving her concerns off. “He understands that I have a young son at home and sometimes he needs me. It’s part of the reason I stay in the slave quarters and not in Gardulla’s palace. They can’t stand to hear him cry.”

“Oh. How old is he?”

“Almost two in a few months,” Shmi answered with a happy smile. “He is my whole world. He has been the best thing to happen to me since I entered into this life.”

As they spoke they crossed over a smaller street and into a part of Mos Espa that had seen better days. The mud brick buildings were built one on top of the other, like a warren or a beehive.

The doors to the different homes were open to allow in the breeze and groups of children ran around, laughing and calling out to each other as they played a complicated game of tag. A quartet of women were sitting in the long shadow of a row of houses, gathered around a battered and dusty table. They were shelling beans as they talked and watched the the neighborhood children.

The youngest of the group, clearly pregnant, was the one who saw them first. “Shmi! You’re back early! Is something wrong? Who are these people?”

“These are my friends, Abarrane,” Shmi answered, gesturing to Ahsoka, Obi-Wan, and Satine. “They protected Sarela from Trazz and Drez.”

“I heard about that!” one of the older woman gasped, peering up at Ahsoka with watery eyes the color of old jade. “Of course, I heard it was a Twi’lek! Thought it was maybe Nalea. Thought she’d finally had enough of those brutes bothering her girlfriend. Well, good job, young one. It couldn’t have happened to a rougher pair of bullies.”

“Thank you,” Ahsoka said, bowing her head. “I just wanted to help.”

“Not enough people in the galaxy like you,” the old woman observed before she caught sight of one of the children up to something dangerous. “Oi! Greedo! Get down from there! You’re going to hurt yourself.”

“How is he?” Shmi asked Abarrane, trading a loaf of bread and some dried figs from the shop for her own bowl of shucked legumes and a package wrapped in waxed flimsi. “Did he give you any trouble?”

“Of course not,” Abarrane replied with a wide smile. “He was an angel. He’s been napping for about an hour.”

“Oh good,” Shmi sighed, and her relief flooded through the Force.

Ahsoka thought it was strange that someone who did not possess Force sensitivity could have such a direct effect on the Force around her. But whatever that meant, she would have to think about it later, she decided as Shmi invited them into her home. “Please come in. It’s a little small but we can make it work.”

Satine and Obi-Wan entered, followed by Ahsoka, and all three happy to find the temperature dropping once they were out of the sun and protected from the oppressive heat by the stone walls around them.

Shmi came in last and closed the door, activating a small circulation system as she directed her guests into the main living area. “Please, make yourselves comfortable. I’m just going to check up on my son.”

Satine took a seat on a plasticrete chair while Obi-Wan sat down on a wooden bench. He offered it to his master but Ahsoka shook her head. “No. I’m fine. I’d rather stand.”

“I’m surprised at how cool it is,” Satine murmured her eyes taking in the details of construction and the small little decorations Shmi had added, from a colorful, if faded, wall hanging made of knotwork and beading to a thin but well-maintained blanket which was folded carefully over the one upholstered chair in the room that all three had left empty for their host.

“Mud-brick buildings are used in hot and arid climates because the bricks serve as insulation,” Obi-Wan explained to Satine. “It keeps the homes cool in the day and warm at night. The desert can be deadly cold at times.”

“I am aware of what a desert can be like,” Satine replied with a wry grin. “I do come from one, you know.”

Obi-Wan turned red. “I’m sorry! I didn’t meant to imply… Of course you would be well aware of the dangers of such an environment!”

Satine let out a giggle and shook her head as Ahsoka smiled. “I was teasing, Obi-Wan.”

“Ah, well, yes,” Obi-Wan blushed even more and looked away before he searched for a topic to hide his embarrassment. “Did we ever catch Shmi’s son’s name?”

“It’s Anakin,” Shmi said, standing in the hallway that opened onto the room where her guests were sitting, her son tucked up against her side. The little boy let out a soft yawn and tried to bury his face in his mother’s shoulder, clearly wanting to go back to his nap. Shmi shifted him around and gently kissed his forehead, whispering to him that they had guests.

It’s him. It has to be him, Ahsoka thought in amazement. After all this time.

“These are friends, Ani,” Shmi whispered to her son, rubbing her hand down his back as he slowly woke up and took in the people around him. “This is… Satine, right?”

“Yes,” Satine nodded, wiggling her fingers in greeting. “Hello, Anakin!”

The small boy blinked at her, his little face wrinkled with confusion before his mother turned toward Ahsoka, who stepped away from the wall to walk over to Shmi and Anakin and smile down at the young boy. “This is Ahsoka and she is a Togruta. Can you say ‘Togruta’, Ani?”

Anakin could not say Togruta but he did let out a delighted giggle as he reached for one of Ahsoka’s lekku, his chubby fist grasping in the air. His face lit up, as did the Force around him, filling the room with such a pure, radiant happiness it almost made Ahsoka cry for joy.

Ahsoka gently stroked Anakin’s cheek as Shmi told him it was very rude to pull on someone’s lekku. “Hello, Little One.”

Hello, Skyguy. I found you.

And finally, Shmi introduced the last guest. “This young man is Obi-Wan. Say ‘hello’ to Obi-Wan, Ani!”

Obi-Wan gave Anakin a wide grin and bowed his head, meeting the boy’s gaze with his own. “Hello, Anakin. It’s a pleasure to meet… you,” he said, trailing off in wonder and awe at the boy’s brilliant presence in the Force.

Anakin just smiled and shyly mumbled, “Hello.”

[falcor-thee-luck-dragon]

Din Djaren x force sensitive reader - A Moment Of Bliss

Summary: You’re trying to meditate but your boys have other plans for you.

Warning: child being cute, fluff, SMUT, Din being the best space husband

Side note: wrote this before I learned the child’s name is Grogu, that is all.

Masterlist

You and your small clan of two have been stationed on a beautiful rolling grassland of a planet, ginormous stocky umbrella like trees sprouting from the flat land every couple miles from one another. They’re honestly quite the sight to behold, and something that you’re grateful for considering there’s no sand in sight. Honestly the most blessed thing of all that this wonderous planet has to offer, you can’t say you’re a real fan of the desert by any means.

Although you’re not exactly fond of the real reasoning why you’re here, it just so happened that Mando had gotten himself into some trouble when he captured the last bounty. A trafficking lord who just wasn’t as clever as he thought, earning himself some chains and a go around in a fun little thing called carbonite.

Nonetheless, his minions had tracked you two down after the bounty had been cashed in, slightly damaging the Razor Crest before Mando was able to lose them with some quick witted maneuvering. But you’re certain they’re still hunting you guys somewhere close by in the galaxy. 

So for the time being, Din has decided for your band of three to lay low on this beautiful planet until he’s sure that the petty criminals have given up, or until you both get bored enough and decide to finish them off yourselves.

Which is all fine for you, what could be better then a tiny vacation away from shady scavengers and untrustworthy pimps? Nothing really, so to make the most out of your fortunately unfortunate escape/ temporary vacation. You’ve chosen to spend your afternoon helping the child practice his growing powers. Although it appears the little guy is more interested in a shiny purple crystal that he found minding its business on the gravely ground.

Sitting yourself in a criss cross position upon the soft grass, you close your eyes as you prepare to meditate when suddenly the child makes the most adorable babbling sound, with an amused smile you open your eyes to look down at him, “I’ll let that slide.” He gurgles while tilting his head to the side, his big green ears flopping ever so slightly as he possibly considers your comment.

Watching him decide to sit down and instead play with the purple crystal, earns a little smirk upon your face as you shut your eyes once again. This time he doesn’t do anything to break your concentration, so taking the blessed opportunity you’re finally able to zone in on the force. Laying your arms onto your folded legs you open your palms, feeling the world around you, sensing the energy flowing in as you begin to rise from the ground.

The child watches in silent awe as small fist sized rocks begin to float and flow in circles around you, your contact with the grass no more. For a couple minutes you’re able to sustain your deep meditation, then a tiny little coo is heard from below as it shuffles in the dirt. You almost lose focus at the intruding noise, but your zoned out enough to come back to the welcoming bleary void of the force.

Another couple minutes go by before an adorable noticeably louder coo pricks at your ears, letting out a huff, you remain in the air, the pebbles and rocks around you keeping themselves suspended just the same. You focus even harder, letting yourself feel weightless and in control as you levitate above the grass, the child deciding to coo and babble once more.

“Shut up you’re gonna break my concentration,” You whisper softly as you carefully continue to levitate mere inches off of the ground. Just then the child suddenly lets out a loud messy sneeze, your face falling in irritation, “Aaaand it’s gone.” You deadpan before falling on your butt with a hmph, the little guy giggling in amusement. You fake glare at him before falling back into the soft grass as you look up to the blue sea of sky when suddenly a dark shinning shadow towers above you.

“How’s the meditation going?” Wonders Din as he joins your little party from where he once was, tending to the ship that is.

Sighing, you pull yourself up from the grass and into a proper seated position as you turn your attention to Din, “Not terribly.” You reply with a love struck grin as you lightly pat the grassy spot next to you, “Sit with me?” He looks at the area before bringing himself down to your level.

“Couldn’t hurt to relax for a minute.” Inquires Din as you roll your eyes.

“We’re being hunted Din, I think this little get away vacation of ours calls for a bit more then just a minute of relaxation. Don’t you agree?” He turns his helmet to you, the black T of his armored face showing you back your own distorted reflection.

“Gives me time to work on the ship.”

Nudging his arm that’s mere inches from your own you look at him with a smile, “Okay so that’s how it’s gonna be, you’re just glad to be working on the ship?” You muse with a fake scoff while shaking your head at him, “I should have known.”

“What? No that’s not...that’s not what I meant Y/N.” He rushes worriedly as you scoot yourself closer to him.

Softly chuckling at his quick reaction, you lean into his side as you casually lace his gloved hand with your own, “I know what you meant. But just cause I’m me, I’d rather have you in my arms then fiddling with that hunk of metal.” You explain before setting your chin against his beskar covered shoulder. You can’t see it, but he’s smiling underneath that helmet of his, looking deeply into your loving gaze.

“Likewise.”

Snaking your arms around the one closest to you, he ever so slightly leans into your touch, “Please take off your helmet so I can see those enticing dark eyes of yours. Please?” You urge with a light squeeze of his arm, “I can’t exactly kiss you like this...no ones around to see anything....and anyways we’re married so I automatically get a free pass.”

He gently squeezes your hand before reaching his arms up to his head, you hear a soft click and a whoosh of air as he pulls off his helmet. A blissful smile breaks out onto your beaming face as his fluffy brown locks appear before you, styled every which way as they embrace their new freedom.

He sets his shiny silver helmet to the side before pulling off his gloves as his dark irises find your face, you’re unabashedly biting your lip while you take in every single feature of his handsome face, “It’s a good thing you wear that helmet of yours,” You lean in close, “cause all the ladies would be fighting each other for a chance to get with you. There’s no doubt in my mind.” You muse as the most adorable of smiles graces his stunning features while he leans his head against yours, his cheeks flushing in embarrassment.

“I have a great suspicion that you’d fight them before they even had a chance to breath in my direction.” Retorts Din as his hands gently grasp your own.

“What? No way.....okay....maybe yes.” He smiles brightly before pulling back, only to let go of your hands as he engulfs you into a giant hug. You quickly squeeze back as you push him into the grass, laughing as the both of you fall onto the soft earth.

Your eyes find his shining dark ones as you lean in close, “We should stay here, disappear from the rest of the galaxy and go M.I.A forever.” He kisses you in reply, his lips are soft and inviting as he holds you impossibly close, the scruff of his day old unkept facial hair scratching your cheek.

He slowly pulls away, earning a pout from you once he’s able to see your face again, “That does sound appealing, but I know you’d get bored with the calmness. You like adventure too much to stay in one spot for very long.” He says with a knowing look as he leans in to plant soft kisses over your cheeks, “I know you Y/N.”

Rolling your eyes you lean down to kiss his nose, “That you do, Din. Sometimes annoyingly so.” You reply before breaking out into an abrupt laugh as you watch him study your face lovingly.

Suddenly you feel a little nudge by your boot, shifting your gaze away from Din you look over to your feet where the little womp rat is. He’s smiling adorably as he babbles some more, stretching his little arms out for one of you to take, making a cute grabby motion with his hands.

Heeding to his silent yearning you sit up to gently pick up the beaming child, “Oh and how could I forget you, my little green bean....you can have all the cuddles too.” He squeals in delight as you hold him close in your lap, Din scoots over so his head is by your thighs as he gently pets his little green son on his wrinkly head.

Running your fingers through Din’s helmet hair you make a funny face at the child causing him to laugh, “I guess staying here for another week couldn’t hurt. I’ve got my two favorite people in the whole galaxy....no need to rush things.” Mutters Din as he looks to you with the biggest heart eyes while you stick your tongue out at the child.

“I’d like that very much, our little green boy....you and me, alone, a ship all to ourselves...no one to bother us.” You add, a suggestive tone laced throughout your sly voice, Din’s eyebrows raise in interest at your intriguing words, much to your amusement.

“And I have time to work on my ship.” Replies Din, side eyeing you to see your reaction to his lackluster comment.

Shaking your head you lightly tug at his tangled hair while he laughs, “You little shit. I’m the best thing that’s ever happened to you...you fucker.” A giggle escapes from your lips as you try and keep a serious face, Din attempting to do the same, though you’re both about to crack.

The baby starts to babble, as he wiggles his little body from side to side in an attempt at gaining back the both of your wandering attentions. Not being able to handle the sheer silliness in the atmosphere you let out a loud burst of laughter, Din following suite.

You watch as the sides of his eyes crinkle in joy, his belly rippling with each new inhalation and exhalation of air, “Din, would you like to see what we’ve been practicing on?” You ask as he finally calms down again.

“You’ve been practicing with him?” He asks with a smile, “I’d love to.”

Turning to the child in your lap you grab his sides before gently setting him onto the ground, “Okay little guy, remember you’re training....what we we’re doing yesterday. First we stick our hand out....and then we focus really hard on wanting to lift up the rocks. Okay.” The child coos in excitement as he lifts his clawed hand out to mirror your own, “Now close your eyes and feel...feel the power around you, the wind, the earth...call to it, let it flow.”

He suddenly lets out a little tut of determination as he does his best to focus, Din watches silently in anticipation for what may happen next. A beaming smile breaks out onto your face as a couple tiny pebbles begin floating off of the grass, the child lets out an excited babble as he celebrates his achievement, “You’re doing fantastic my little love, I’m so proud of you.” He coos even more as you gush in amazement, the pebbles falling to the grass as he gets distracted by your words of encouragement.

“But can Y/N lift some little stones?” Jokes Din as he gently nudges your arm, you raise an eyebrow to him before using the force to lift him a couple inches off of the grass. His eyes go wide for a second, clearly not expecting you to mess with him before you drop him onto the soft grass once again.

He lands with a dramatic huff, you look to him and your heart skips a beat as he eyes you up like a wolf to his prey, you swallow just as he suddenly tackles you into the soft green grass. You fall back with a yelp as your Mandalorian pins you to the ground, his beaming face so close to your own as he stares into your eyes with his dark ones.

“You think you’re real funny, hmm Y/N?” His voice is low and husky, his breath fanning your smirking face as he attempts to take the upper hand, “Cause that kinda hurt my arm.”

You simply roll your eyes, “I’ve seen you get swallowed by a Krayt dragon, you reckless man. Tough it out my love, you don’t want to make a bad impression on the little guy now do yo...” His soft lips are suddenly on yours as he shuts you up with his soft plush lips. The child waddles over towards the Razor Crest, uninterested with training and with whatever wrestling game you and Din are becoming entangled in.

You smile into the kiss as Din rests his weight in between your opened thighs and stomach, he rests his forearm upon the grass as his other hand caresses the side of your face. You bask in his body as your hands feel through his soft wavy locks, he moans into your mouth at the pleasant sensation, earning an amused chuckle from you.

Your opened mouth giving him enough space to stick his tongue into it as he teases you, you answer back just the same, your tongues dancing in the dark as he consumes you. He feels rather nice, you can’t help but to begin feeling a bit heated in your nether regions from the close proximity in this compromising position he has you in. Your body erupts with electricity as he starts to grind into you, the slow small friction against your clothed womanhood sending you into another realm of pleasure, and he’s not even inside you yet. 

“Right in the grass?” You mumble against his lips as he bucks against your hips, the sensation driving you insane.

Knowing exactly how it’s making you squirm, he feels rather proud of himself, “Ships too far.” Mutters Din between kisses as he reaches down to unclasp his belt.

Your lips stay locked, a surprised gasp leaving your mouth as Din tugs down your own pants. He sits up and quickly makes haste with discarding his armored torso, flinging off top clothing and undershirt as you lift up your arms for him to pull off yours. The fabric falling to the grass as the both of you take in each other’s nearly naked bodies, your thin undergarments the only pieces keeping you away from total bliss.

He rests himself upon his bent knees while dark pleading irises stare into your own, he’s asking silent permission to disrobe you of all clothing. A smile breaks out upon your flushed face, nodding in a silent yes, his eyes flash with excitement and lust as he reaches over to tug at the edges of the tight fabric, he gently pulls off your bra. Your breasts bounce once they’re free from their constraints, Din’s brows raising in excited surprise before leaning down to kiss each one before he captures your lips with his once more.

Din you have no idea what you do to me.

Deciding you’d quite like it if both of you were naked, you pull away, Din’s face following yours as he pouts. In reply to his protests you fall back into the grass, “My undies aren’t gonna take themselves off.” You muse with a lustful gaze upon your man, god you already feel so wet, Din’s most obviously hard and you’re so ready for him.

His cheeks are flushed as he gently grasps the hem of your underwear on either side of your hips, you lift your bum up when he slides them down your legs, abandoning them in the grassy field. Your heart soars when he leans down to plant a kiss on the inside of your bare thigh, then another and another as he trails up to your knee. He pulls away to look at you once again, his face a mask of pure love and adoration as he shimmies out of his bulging boxers.

Biting your lip, you lean up to meet his lips, he kisses you deeply as he rests his calloused hands into each one of your knees, ever so carefully he parts them. Your nerves sending a wave of heat into your core for the anticipation of what’s to come, both literally and figuratively. If not for the current events you’d be laughing, your wandering thoughts quickly dissipating away once he pushes you back so that you’re laying in the soft earth as he locks eyes with you.

Giving you the most beautiful of smiles he kisses your abdomen, then below your bellybutton, up to your stomach, and in between your breasts. He’s hovering annoyingly close to you. You arch into him, the skin of his torso meeting your exposed womanhood, a moan escapes him from the wet contact against his stomach. You let out a breathy laugh as he squeezes and kneads your left breast, his mouth consuming the other one, his tongue working wonders as he sucks and licks at your perked nibbles.

Your hands tangle in his wavy dark hair as he continues his pleasurable assault in your breasts, his fingers may cause a little discomfort as he squeezes but you’re enjoying it too much to give a shit. His hot wet tongue dances in circles around your skin, he lets go of your breast to then lick up your turned neck. Doing everything in your power to keep it all inside, you bite your lip in an attempt at suppressing a moan, your voice breaking free once his hardened member rubs past your entrance without warning.

“There’s that pretty voice of yours.” Mutters Din before capturing his lips with yours, his hands held firmly against the ground as he holds himself up inches from you.

How annoying you can be, Din. Just get closer you idiot. 

You feel so warm and fuzzy, his body mere inches from your wanting skin, your legs already open and ready as his length stays firm only centimeters away from your lower abdomen. Tugging at his hair, he parts from your lips as a confused expression crosses his features, you simply chuckle, “Stop making me wait my love, I’m ready for you.” His eyes closing in bliss as you purr sweetly into his ear, “I need you in me, now.”

Heeding to your straightforward command, he reaches a hand down as he guides his hardened cock to your awaiting entrance. He rubs it against your clit in a teasing manner before he slowly pushes into you, your hands flying to his muscular back as your walls adjust to his length. With a soft moan from his sweet lips, he fills you entirely, for a couple seconds does he pause. Letting himself enjoy the sensation of his cock inside you as he presses butterfly kisses all over your face.

Yes, fucking finally.

Not being able to stand it anymore, you buck your hips into him, this giving Din the cue to start working his magic. He completely pulls out of you before slamming himself into your slickness once again, a gasp leaving your lips as he does it again and again and again. Until he decides to keep himself flush against you, his new close contact vigorous thrusts sending more waves of euphoria coursing throughout your entire vessel. All that’s heard in the breeze is the sounds of your moaning and the slabs of skin on skin as Din pumps relentlessly into you.

You’re honestly rather glad that those bastard scavengers ran you into hiding on this planet, it had been a while since you and Din had had any real intimate time together and this was the perfect opportunity. Humming in pleasure, you kiss his scruffy cheek as his head falls into the crook of your neck, “Din I fucking love you so much, you have no idea.” More deep strokes are thrust into you as he kisses the side of your head.

“Y/N ni kar'tayli gar darasuum.....” His all he manages to mutter as another satisfied moan escapes him. You chuckle at how absolutely adorable and hot he’s acting right now, another thrust into you emitting a moan from your lips. He feels so good with how he’s treating you in this special moment, your two bodies colliding like stars in the sky.

You suck in a breath as a warmness builds in the pit of your stomach, you can feel your orgasm slowly rising with each and every pump into you. Din hums as he pushes you into the grass even more now, you can tell from how much more rigorous his thrusts are becoming that he’s on the edge of paradise. 

And soon after he grunts, does he spill into you, the new added sensation enough to drive you wild with bliss. Your own high finally reached as your body shakes with euphoria and the last sloppy thrusts that he’s giving you freely.

A whimper escapes from your mouth as he enjoys himself inside of you for a couple more seconds before he slowly pulls out and flops by your side on the soft grass. He’s breathing heavily as you let the cool breeze fan over your sensitive swollen womanhood, the wind doing wonders for your hot sweaty skin as you try and calm down from your buzz. You close your eyes with a satisfied smile upon your content face as Din turns over to you with an equally joyous grin.

You listen and feel as he scoots himself against your side so that he can rest his arm over your stomach, his scruffy face inches from your cheek as he gently kisses you before resting his head against your temple. You lift your arm up to lay it over top of his as he hugs your side, doing his best to keep you as close to him as physically possible.

A pleasant sigh departs from his pouty lips, fanning the side of your face as you smile, “Y/N, you are very special to me...I just thought that you should know. Incase you ever forget.”

A small chuckle escapes you at his soft words, “Din I don’t think I could ever forget, you mean more to me then all the stars in the sky...more than the most valuable gems to ever exist or even my lightsaber.” He kisses your temple once again, “I believe the force has brought me to you my love, and I’m forever grateful for that.” You voice is a soft whisper on the breeze, yet he hears it all the same.

“Y/N I love you more than life, you are too sweet my beloved.” Your heart skips at his truthful reply, a small lump in your throat forming as he presses his nose against your hairline.

You turn your head to see his face better, he locks eyes with your own as a shy smile appears on his face, “Din Djaren you’re going to make me cry, shut up.” You muse with a quick kiss to his lips, looking into his dark brown irises like they hold all the answers to the universe.

He smiles against your cheek, kissing you there once more, “Never.”

[thebakingqueen5]

KW 2021: Missing Scenes

Day 3 for Kataang Week 2021 hosted by @kataang-week with the prompt Missing Scenes!

This was arguably the most obvious way to go about this prompt but I wanted to write it anyways because if there’s one missing scene that should’ve been included in the series, it’s something to bridge the gap between EIP and Sozin’s Comet.

Links: AO3 | FF.net

Summary: Another year, another summer, another week of prompts celebrating our favorite couple. Kataang Week 2021 Day 3: Missing Scenes. Bridging the gap between the Ember Island Players and Sozin’s Comet Series Finale.

Word Count: 2.8K

It was another cool night on Ember Island. The moon was beginning to rise and was lighting up the corridors and central courtyard while the Gaang got some food to replenish themselves after a long day of training and preparations.

Sozin’s Comet was a mere few days away, and tensions were higher than ever. Earlier that day, the true plans of the Firelord had been revealed: that he was planning to use the comet to wipe out the Earth Kingdom entirely, which meant that Aang had to face him on the doomsday itself at the latest. It was a challenge he felt none too prepared for.

He thought that he was going to get more time to master his earth and firebending, but with this newest revelation, it was pretty clear this was not the case, and the stress was beginning to get to the young airbender.

The practice battle against Toph posing as the Melonlord had Aang’s stomach tied in knots. Before today, the final fight seemed so distant, almost inconceivable, something that he would only have to do when he was absolutely ready for it. But now? It was coming, and it was coming fast, and Aang had no idea how to handle it.

The boy hadn’t really thought about what he would do when he finally faced Ozai. He assumed that by the time he mastered all four elements, the solution would be obvious, but it wasn’t. Everyone else seemed convinced that killing him was the only option, but that went against everything Aang had been taught by the monks. It didn’t feel right. It didn’t feel like him. How was he supposed to do something so drastic when he didn’t even believe in it? There had to be another way, something he was missing, there just had to be!

“I have a surprise for everyone!” Katara called as she walked into the clearing, immediately snapping Aang out of his intense thoughts. He briefly glanced up from the plate of food in front of him as everyone’s eyes turned to the crimson-clad waterbender, a rolled up tan scroll in her hands.

“I knew it!” Toph exclaimed. She grinned devilishly as she looked up from her wooden bowl of rice. “You did have a secret thing with Haru!”

Sokka, Suki, Zuko, and Katara all blinked at her in confusion and gave the blind earthbender a bewildered look, unsure of where her supposed epiphany came from.

“Uh…” the waterbender responded slowly as the others returned to their meals. “No. I was looking for cooking pots in the attic and I found this.”

She unfurled the parchment in her hands, making a slight swish noise.

“Look at baby Zuko,” she cooed. “Isn’t he cute?”

The paper in her hands was in fact a painting showing a happy, bright-eyed cherub of a baby laughing as he played on the beach. He looked to be quite young, having only a tiny topknot on his head and a mere two teeth in his small mouth while a tiny shovel and sandcastle lay on the ground next to him.

Everyone except for Zuko laughed and “aww”d at the adorable picture while the firebender stared at the others gravely.

“Oh, lighten up,” Katara admonished when she noticed his lack of response. “I’m just teasing.”

“That’s not me,” the firebender said, opening his eyes to look at her. “It’s my father.”

The Gaang looked on in shock as Katara rolled the scroll back up. They were all wondering the same thing- how could such a precious baby have become the most cruel man on the planet?

“But he looks so sweet and innocent,” Suki frowned, her voice faltering.

“Well, that sweet little kid grew up to be a monster,” Zuko spat. “And the worst father in the history of fathers.”

“But he’s still a human being.”

Everyone turned to look at the source of the voice. Aang’s back was hunched over his tray of rice and beans a few feet away from them, and a deep frown rested on his normally cheery features.

“You’re going to defend him?” Zuko questioned.

“No,” Aang clarified. “I agree with you.”

“Firelord Ozai is a horrible person, and the world would probably be better off without him,” he said as he stood up and turned around to face them, “but there’s gotta be another way.”

“Like what?” Zuko deadpanned.

“I don’t know,” Aang shrugged. He turned his gaze down and away from the others, eyebrows tilted upwards in concentration, when an idea came to him.

“Maybe we can make some big pots of glue, and then I can use gluebending to stick his arms and legs together so he can’t bend anymore!” he said excitedly.

Zuko smiled sarcastically. “Yeah, then you can show him his baby pictures, and all those happy memories will make him good again.”

“Do you really think that would work?” Aang asked eagerly, oblivious to Sokka and Suki snickering behind the firebender.

“No!”

Aang sighed heavily and hung his head in defeat. He needed to find another solution, think out of the box somehow. He stared at the ground for a few moments in exasperation before hopping down the stone steps to pace under a hanging orange lamp in the courtyard.

“This goes against everything I learned from the monks,” he said, walking back and forth. “I can’t just go around wiping out people I don’t like!”

“Sure you can!” Sokka interjected from the sidelines. “You’re the Avatar! If it’s in the name of keeping balance I’m pretty sure the universe will forgive you.”

Aang’s arms and slumped upper body shook violently with rage.

“This isn’t a joke, Sokka!” he shouted. “None of you understand the position I’m in!”

How could they, after all? They hadn’t been at the Air Temples a century ago. They hadn’t been raised by the Nomads to be peaceful and treat every life as sacred. He was the last of his people, and somehow none of them could see that. To them it was the simplest decision in the world- just get it over with and save the world, but it wasn’t to Aang. It wasn’t as cut and dry as that.

“Aang, we do understand,” the waterbender frowned. “It’s just-”

“Just what, Katara? What?”

“We’re trying to help!” she said angrily, her temper also rising.

“Then, when you figure out a way for me to beat the Fire Lord without taking his life, I'd love to hear it!”

Aang raised his arms in frustration with the last few words and stormed off in the direction of his room, feet stomping loudly against the stone floor.

“Aang, don’t walk away from this,” Katara began as she made a movement to follow him.

Zuko put a hand on her shoulder, and the waterbender faltered, turning towards him.

“Let him go,” he said quietly. “He needs time to sort it out by himself.”

The waterbender huffed in indignation and began walking towards her own room.

“I’m going to turn in early tonight,” she muttered, arms wrapped around her torso. “Good night, guys.”

“Good night,” the rest of them mumbled back, all but Zuko turning their attention back to dinner. The firebender scrutinized her receding figure as Katara turned the corner and went down the left hall to her room. He knew she was likely going to talk with him anyways that night, but the least he could do was make sure she gave the airbender enough space to cool down.

After a few minutes of glaring at the corridor, Zuko turned back to the ragtag team of misfits and their lively voices. Though he had been traveling with Team Avatar for some time now, the way they managed to turn the subject of conversation to the Earth King’s bear Bosco in such a short amount of time would forever be a mystery to him, but nevertheless he listened attentively and heard from them all the latest exploits of what went on beyond Fire Nation borders.

Meanwhile, true to her word, Katara went back to her room and attempted to sleep, but it was an effort in vain. The last few days had been weighing heavily on her- she and Aang had never experienced such a tumultuous period in their friendship before, and between the kiss during the play and the past ten minutes, it was safe to say there was some tension.

She closed her eyes and groaned, tossing and turning to try and find a comfortable position to no avail. She just couldn’t take her mind off it. Katara stared at the ceiling and let out a short huff before sitting back up with a new fire in her eyes. She wasn’t going to sit around, no, she was going to face her problems head on like a rock!

“Toph would be so proud,” Katara chuckled as she wrapped her kimono on over her bindings.

With as much stealth as she could muster, Katara carefully opened the door from her room and crept down the hallway until she was facing the entrance to Aang’s.

She stared at the block of wood intently. It almost seemed like a cruel metaphor- the barrier between her and Aang not only physically, but emotionally as well.

Nevertheless, Katara was here to get things done.

The waterbender didn’t want to knock and alert everyone else of what she was doing, but she also didn’t want to show up unannounced and startle Aang. After a few minutes of careful consideration, Katara concluded that the latter was the lesser of the two evils, and she slowly pushed the handle and entered his room.

In the very back, she saw Aang’s silhouette in the partially open paper divider splitting the balcony from the main room. Katara walked closer to him, and she sat down silently at the opening of the divider when she saw him in deep concentration. He had been meditating with four small candles, some water, and some rice buns on a wooden board in front of him. The dim light of the candles highlighted Aang’s tense features, contorted in frustration.

“I know you’re there, Katara,” the airbender said after a few moments, apparently not as concentrated as she thought. “I could hear your footsteps from a mile away.”

The girl blushed furiously in embarrassment and promptly decided the floor was the most fascinating thing she had ever seen.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt,” Katara apologized. “I just wanted to talk but I get if you’re busy-”

Aang sighed and bowed his head in reverence to the spirits before opening his eyes and turning to look at her with a kind expression.

“It’s alright. Meditating wasn’t really getting me anywhere anyways,” he said sheepishly. “What did you want to talk about?”

Katara twisted a lock of hair around her finger and scooted closer to him.

“I’m not here to lecture you or anything. I’m not here to tell you what you should or shouldn’t do because ultimately it’s up to you and only you. You’re under a lot of stress right now, and I get that. I just don’t want, well, us,” she gestured between them, “to be a part of that stress.”

The airbender laughed nervously and looked at the trees around them to avoid her gaze. He subtly wiped his growingly sweaty hands on his cotton shirt, praying to all the spirits that she wasn’t talking about what he thought she was talking about.

“W-w-what do you mean? You, me, we’re f-friends! Good friends! Th-that’s all there is to it, right?”

“I’m talking about last night at the play,” Katara responded quietly, fingers fidgeting around in her lap. “We should talk about it.”

“Thanks a lot, spirits,” Aang groaned internally. He sighed and tucked his knees into his body.

“I think we both made it pretty clear that we want different things, Katara. It’s alright, really,” he said with a sad smile. “I made a mistake kissing you, especially after you already said you were confused, and I’m sorry. You don’t have to worry about me- I’ll get over it. I just don’t want to lose your friendship. I’d rather we just pretend like it never happened.”

The regret in his eyes was as clear as a full moon against the backdrop of a cloudless night sky, and it killed Katara from within to see it.

“We both said a lot of things that night, Aang,” she frowned. “I’ve been thinking about it a lot the last day, and I didn’t explain myself very well.”

Aang looked at her hesitantly, silently pleading with her to continue. The waterbender tried her hardest not to grin when she saw his unintentional yet extremely endearing puppy dog eyes and instead threw her head back to look at the stars above them.

“I don’t want to lose your friendship either, Aang,” Katara murmured, gazing up at the sky. “You’re the first person I’ve known from outside my tribe, the first other bender I’ve met- you showed me the world. You were my first real friend, and... also my first kiss, first three actually.”

Heat rushed up to their cheeks while Aang became very invested in the wooden flooring, eyes fully concentrated on the patterns of the boards .

“...but more than that,” Katara continued, “you’re the first person I’ve cared for this much, and my brain, my heart, really, doesn’t quite know how to feel about that.”

She tilted her head to the side to look at the boy next to her, who was now also staring at her with newfound hope.

“So yeah,” she exhaled loudly, “I’m confused. But I don’t want to pretend like none of that night ever happened, because if I’m being honest, a part of me wanted all of the… all of our kisses to happen.”

The two sat in silence for a few moments while Aang tried to process her words and formulate his own response.

“So…” Aang trailed off. “Does that mean this, us, still has a chance?”

Katara looked at their intertwined hands and gave him a sad smile.

“Maybe, but that’s just it, Aang. We can’t, not right now.”

The airbender’s cautious smile immediately dropped and was replaced by a frown as he broke eye contact.

“We’re in a war,” she murmured apologetically. “No one, especially not us, can afford to do anything differently. In three days, you’re going to be facing the Firelord, which means in three days, one way or another, this war will be over, and sacrifices will probably be made.”

“Katara, you’re not saying-”

She shook her head. “I’m not saying that, but war means making hard decisions, and in that moment, with that decision, we can’t let emotions cloud our judgement. No matter what sacrifices might be made, we have to end this before it’s too late.”

“I’ll make sure it doesn’t come to that,” Aang said firmly. “I don’t care what it takes.”

Katara smiled at him and leaned in to gently press a kiss to his cheek.

“I know you won’t. I also know that whatever happens with the Firelord, you’ll do the right thing. Not because you’re the Avatar and you have to, but because you’re Aang. Because you’re my Aang, and my Aang always does the right thing.”

The airbender let out a breath of relief, heart practically glowing at her faith in him, and enveloped her in an embrace.

“Thank you, Katara. For everything. For being here for me the last few months, for getting me out of that iceberg, for coming here tonight telling me what I really needed to hear. It means a lot.”

Katara happily returned the hug and squeezed him tight. “Of course, Aang.”

She furrowed her eyebrows when she noticed the circles under his eyes as they broke apart.

“It’s getting late,” Katara whispered, her fingertips lightly tracing his cheeks.

“I’ll leave you to all this-” she gestured to the candles and food, staring quizzically at the contents of the board. “-Avatar business and whatnot. I wish you the best of luck.”

“Thanks, I’ll try my best,” Aang laughed softly as the girl stood up and began walking back to her room. “Good night, Katara. Sweet dreams.”

“I know you will, Aang. Good night and don’t stay up too late- you’ll need your rest.”

The waterbender quietly exited and Aang released a heavy sigh as the door closed with a soft thud.

The airbender turned back to his spread, closed his eyes once more, and resumed his meditation, hoping that somehow, by some miracle, there was another way waiting for him.

“I sure hope you’re right, Katara. I’ll need that luck.”

[rebloged-content]

Recommended Sanders Sides creators

Marry Christmas, everyone! And a wonderful December day to all of you who don’t celebrate Christmas, too. Let’s be honest right off the bat, though: I’m only using the date as an excuse to do this list anyways.

So. Throughout the time I’ve spent as a part of this wonderful corner of the sanders sides fandom over here on tumblr, I’ve often found a new creator and wished I’d found them sooner. It kind of makes me wonder who else I might miss. If you do to, here are a few creators I’d love for you to check out. You’ll probably recognize some of the names, if not all, but maybe you’ll find a new favorite creator here?

And to the creators in question, I really love your content. If you’ve made it onto this list, you’ve definitely cause one or two sleepless nights of reading for me, because who needs sleep if I can have this, right? XD Whatever you’ll find written next to your name is the impression you’ve left on me and… Well, just know that you’ve made some days of my life at least a little happier, all of you. And I hope to repay the favor by telling you how much I appreciate you releasing your content into this world… Well, repay the favor at least a little, I suppose.

Let’s begin, then, shall we?

@5am-the-foxing-hour Because this? This is who you go to if you want to read good Janus-content. You are in a mood to read sympathetic Janus? Wanna see the danger noodle just casually interact with other sides? Go to their short stories. I mean, “the cult”? Prime example of how to tell a story with impact in just a few words. 8 paragraphs, but boy did I read that one on repeat. Or “water spray bottle”, this one is fun, short and will make you laugh. An energy drink for the fander heart, so to say.

Then there’s their mafia-au, “there’s more in me than precious metals”. Six are out so far, and I adore every single word of every single part of this. Protective Remus, sassy Janus, angst, comedy relief, destruction, Roman-Remus-sibling-rivalry, braincell Logan, survival instinct Virgil, working together over a common enemy… This fic has it all, believe me. Take your time and read it, because you will read the entire thing in one go once you start. At least I did, and I didn’t even notice.

And their advent writings? Those had me squealing and jumping around in a way I will deny if anyone ever sees it. I don’t even know what else to say, they are fucking fantastic and that’s that.

So, yeah. Go check them out, before I start fangirling about them even more. You know my personal favorites now, so just go there. You won’t regret it.

Next up is @coconut-cluster. Ah, yes, Lexi. Lexi, whose uni-AU started as self indulgent and has become the loceit story on tumblr. We all know her, or at least most of us do, and we all love her too. And while I also drop everything I do at any point of time I possibly can once I realize the uni-au has any form of new addition, there are a lot of other fics created by her that you should check out as well.

Did you, for example, ever want a sappy prinxiety one-shot with the sappiness only being implied, a mutual understanding of “we’re-not-saying-we-care-but-we-both-know-we-do” born from joking reassurances and a not-a-date-nope-only-a-break? While that may seem to be a tall order, that is exactly what “before the sun goes down” is. Plus there’s ice cream. Or maybe you’re more of a logince fan? Do you want a fic where Roman isn’t the prince but serves His Highness? Do you like sincere talks while you’re procrastinating showing your face to the subjects you don’t really want to rule over? In that case, you really should read “Viva la Vida”. Careful, though, this one is so sweet you’ll probably get a toothache… There also is an analogical fic that I’ve enjoyed very much: “Cracks in the Ceiling”. I love it, because it’s just calm. Fears creeping up on you, thrown away by a trusted friend with a few words, just by being there and playing into the metaphors you head created this time around. It’s calm, and there’s not really a climax or anything, but it doesn’t need one. Because it’s just a glance into everyday life. It’s beautiful in its own right, really.

What I’m saying is, Lexi has a lot more wonderful stories to tell than the uni-au. It’s the most popular one, sure, and it’s one of her best works. But you really should check out her other fics as well. Lexi herself once said that she writs fics she’d like to read. I would figure it’s because of this, but her stories are mostly things you don’t really find anywhere else. Dynamics, stories, world building, all of those are aspects you may find somewhere else. But Lexi is just one of those people who see what they miss in a fandom and create it themselves, and among these creators Lexi is my favorite. She just has that certain skill that makes that approach to writing result in the most enjoyable reading experiences. Lexi’s fics are special, because they’re different, because they are authentic and you can feel that when you’re reading her work.

@djpurple3 is another talented individual I want to talk about. I have to confess, DJ is, as far as original content goes, almost exclusively locked in my brain with the fiction “I just keep loosing my beat”. 23 Chapters so far, one better than the last. It’s a bitter-sweet story following Remus and his children, after the bitch of a mother has been brought behind bars. Abusive piece of shit. Yeah, I don’t like her much. But the story is so full of love and support, everyone trying their best, everyone seeing how much the others deserve the world and wishing they could give it to them… Roman and Remus have a sibling-dynamic I would die for here, too. Patton is just the most adorable friend to Deceit - here Damion - Virgil is a precious bean, Logan is cute and the teacher we all wish he’d had ourselves and… god, I could keep gushing about this fic forever. I’ll stop now, though, before I’ll start spoiler things. Wouldn’t want to do that, especially since I really, really, really want more people to give this a go. It’s not underrated, I just think everyone who doesn’t is missing out by a lot, so… Go over there and read DJ’s fic right fucking now, if you haven’t already read it at least once. Thank you.

@delimeful​, our wonderful lime-friend with a cute cat making a terrifying face in his header. First of all, there is the WIBAR universe, short for “Watch it burn and rust”. 5 chapters in act one, 4 intermissions (one of those with three chapters), one chapter of act two, as well as three extras and an au of this au called “the end of being alone”, and I’ve lost count of how many nights I spent reading those instead of sleeping like I should. (Or interacting with family. Or being productive. Or… It’s really a good story, okay?!) WIBAR is a deathworlder au. So a space au in which humans are regarded as dangerous deathworlders who can survive on a deathworld like earth. In other words, Virgil is the only human, and boy does that scare everyone around him. And the best part? You can feel the development, the shift in mentality regarding Virgil, feel the moment approach in which he isn’t a threat but a companion instead.

And, apart from the fic that inspired me enough to start writing “TINND!R?” over on my writing blog, there are a lot more amazing fics to read on lime’s blog. He wrote “How easy you are to need”, for example. It’s soft, it pulls at just the right heartstrings, it’s achingly hopeful and, god, the ending still has me in tears, even after the fifth - ? sixth? something among those lines - reread. This one’s a werewolf au, actually. Virgil is the werewolf, Logan, Patton and Roman are the humans.

Do you want yourself some of that pre-AA dynamic? I’d recommend “to taste your beating heart”. In this, Virgil gets separated from the rest of his group of vampire hunters and gets turned into a vampire himself, loosing his memories. And he’s “Anx” now, not “Virgil”, goddamnit! He isn’t their friend anymore, why don’t they understand that? Well, probably because they can still see Virgil’s old habits shining through. There’s a lot of tension, a lot of angst and a whole lot of frustration involved in this.

He also wrote some amazing one-shots. They’re mostly so well written that I’m almost sad not to be waiting on a continuation. There’s “the littlest mermaid”, in which Virgil goes to investigate a noise, finding a scared, tiny mermaid in need of help. In “community gardens” we have Remus being Remus, gaining the interest and friendship of the forest’s giant Logan. “Magical mutualism” tells the tale of a witch and a demon making a pact beneficial to both parties and opening the doors neither could have gone beyond alone. The way we’re all confused about our ships not actually having set sail yet comes to a hight in Virgil in regards to his friends in “amateur matchmakers”. And this is the point at witch I stop talking before I actually recommend every single one of lime’s fics instead of just my favorites as I had planed because I started to gush too much… XD

Let’s move on to @muppenthings​. Mupp is an amazing artist and she created a giant mermaid au. There’s this one orca who’s just… We love her, but I actually don’t think she’s the brightest. I really, really love her, though. Virgil himself is being a little protective over his human friends and casually so. I love this comic series for the art style, but I also love the way it makes me crack a laugh at least once per work. Or appeal to my mother-instincts, if it’s about baby Virgil. Too cute for his own good, I tell ya! And the facial expressions! The detail, the jokes, everything about this is wonderful. You should at least take a look.

@whenisitenoughtrees​. Cat got me with “This cup of yours tastes holy (This lie is dead)”. “A slow voice on a wave of phase” was next, later “Infinity and beyond”, “we are not alone in the dark with out demons” and “changing of the guard”. And then, suddenly, the night was over. I’ve read almost all of the fics in one go, and I’ve been semi-frequently visiting her master post ever since. When “There’s an endless road to rediscover” came out just a little while back, that lead to me re-reading through almost the entire list. I don’t regret it, my plans for that weekend would like to disagree.

These six fics I mentioned here are, by no means, the only ones I enjoyed. Those are just the ones I’ve found myself opening up again and again in sleepless nights. Those are the ones that pop up in my head and have me smiling to myself in the middle of god-knows-whatever-I’ve-been-doing-at-the-time.

Angst, fluff, hurt-comfort, you’ll find everything in that list. And something I’ve grown to like about Cat’s fics even more than anything else is the quick change between feeling perplexed, a startled laugh at certain wordings (you’ll know what I’m talking about when you see it) and apprehension. These fics will have you at the edge of you seat, swooping you away on an emotional roller coaster. And, god, the way Cat writes from Remus’ perspective? The introductions of her stories and the way she redirects to the main topic after going into detail on something? I saved a few paragraphs as screenshots on my phone because I love them and I want to read them again when I’m down. I just… Cat’s great.

Next up is @eliemo. Because Elias Virgil is the royalty of Virgil angst. From the touch-starved Virgil we’ve all had a head cannon of at one point in “Heart of Ice”, over ace Virgil panicking over telling his boyfriends that he his ace and didn’t think to tell them before in “Love our way” to so, so much more.

Mostly EV follows the story arc of an underlying feeling of dread at the beginning, which slowly grows into panic, exploding in a storm of angst and concludes in everyone, or at least whoever is around, coming to the rescue and helping to calm down, with the end being the hope for getting better in the future. They always manage to convey the confusion, fear or just the general thought process so well that you can’t help but get absorbed in the story. They know exactly what to say and what to leave between the lines to get the maximum effect. And, your heart will definitely be shattered after their angst. Still, the way the sides comfort each other and support each other so well every time is just… I love their stories, a lot.

I want to make two more suggestions if you want to check out this creator. A Janus angst fic, which can only be described as “ouch” you’ll find under the name “snake bite”. It hurts in the best way possible, because Janus gets the comfort he deserves.

The other suggestion gets a lot darker. It’s about Virgil having been abused by the “others” before he got accepted into the light side. The others are shocked to find out what has gone on behind their backs and they help Virgil in every way they can to recover. Of cause it’s a rocky path, though. This would be “Learned Behavior”. The series/au has twelve stories so far, one of which has two parts. You’ll find the master post for this pinned to the top on their blog.

If you like angst, you should also give @maybedefinitely404​ a look. Ly has a soulmate-au going, in which they use the concept of “you hear the music your soulmate listens to”. "Music in my head” is a prinxiety fic, but the two of them have yet to meet. Four chapters and two mini-fics in. The reason I mentioned angst is because in this - spoiler alert for the first few chapters here - , Virgil gets put through conversion therapy. Luckily Janus and Logan are better foster parents than the ones who did that to him.

They also have a master list for all their soulmate stories, featuring different ships. Apparently they participated in soulmate month, if I understood that correctly. And to be honest, that was how I even found their account. I absolutely adore their anxceit fic, which takes place in a human au. It’s starting off pretty sad, but the bonding moments are absolutely wonderful. It’s a lovely story, and the ending is one of the best ones I’ve yet to read. Their logince fic took my breath away, too. A flower shop/tattoo artist au, and Logan is the tattoo artist. Stunning writing, wonderful world building, just the right amount of backstory to have everything make sense without overwhelming/drowning the reader in unnecessary details. Their moxceit fiction… Well, this one had me in tears within the first few paragraphs. It’s terrible and you feel for Janus, whose perspective this is written from. The ending, though… Gods! The ending was so indescribably cute. To be honest, all of the soulmate stories are great, these three are just my personal favorites.

Concerning their one shots, you’ll probably have to figure it out on your own concerning this. I haven’t been able to read all of them yet, as sad as that makes me. Definitely palling on doing it in the future, though. I did read two of them, though. “Pippity poppity” really was amusing, and I am so looking forward to the second part of “The Boy who sings next door”. The way they write the dynamics between the sides? I live for that.

Another creator I would like to recommend is @maybe-im-tired.They don’t have a master post, as far as I could see, but they only post their content anyways, so… “Can’t take my eyes off of you” is my favorite out of their fics so far. I mean, the way they managed to fit the sheer chaos that is intrulogical into this one short fic is amazing. And you could take about two thirds of what Remus said and put it up on your wall as out-of-contexts-quotes. Don’t worry, he says them out of context anyways, and they will definitely make you laugh. 

The series of short stories for the human au that starts with “Glowing stars” is another au by them that you will almost certainly like. We have Logan and Virgil as kids (about 7 I think), Remus and Patton as single parents, Roman as the most adoring uncle, Emile as babysitter and Remy as his amazing partner. Remus is a great father, wonderfully chaotic as well. And a teacher! Imagine that, Remus as your teacher... He’s great with kids though, as long as they aren’t entitled villains come to make his precious Virgil feel bad, that is.

They also wrote a bunch of “random one shots”. They are all amazing, but my favorite has to be this one. It’s a logince one, once again human au. Patton may or may not tell his big brother’s crush about the feelings he wasn’t prepared to share yet. You know, as small kids do. It’s soft, it will make you smile as much as Logan does, and I love Remus in it. I generally like how they write Remus, okay? I know how much I’ve said it, but I’m not even exaggerating. They always write him differently, and all versions they write him as are so, so lovable and just… I wanna hug the life out of all Remus versions they wrote, okay? Take a look, you’ll know why.

Anyways. Let’s continue with @figurative-siren-song. This is the last account I’ve followed and I’m still sad about it having taken me this long to find them. Little salty, to be honest. (I’ll stick to they/them because they said just not to use she/her, and, well… consistency, you know? Don’t have much, so I have to get what I can XD). When I finally did find them, I went through their entire master list (at least all of the ships with characters I actually know. I’m kinda bad with the shorts characters, so I usually just… avoid them? Idk. Personal preference, I guess), and, well… I would honestly recommend every single fic on that list. They call themself “Repair Fluff King™️” and they deserve that title. But when they warn you that a fic will be angsty, it will be angsty.

I found them through the anxceit fic “A Deal”. Well, through an animatic by their friend on youtube that had linked the fic, but details. I’ve been reading this fic up and down again and again. It’s just so good! And when they talk in the second part and Janus explains why he proposed that deal. Or in the continuation, which i can’t talk about because I will probably spoiler things! So wholesome!

 Also, their losleepxeity fic “We’re worth it”. So soft! The nicknames, the plot, the everything. It’s softer than clouds look, and we all know that means something.

But, really. Everyone will find something for them by this creator. So many ships, all incredibly well written, and soft and fluffy without getting boring in the slightest. It’s as energizing as coffee, actually. And, let’s be honest, this whole fandom drowns itself in angst most of the time. Take a break from that, repair your broken hearts with goof fluffy content that you’ll want to read over and over again. Go check this creator out. You will love them. 

Last but not least… @myfriendsasthesides​ A blog by a creator who just takes the wonderfully chaotic dynamics of a friend group and using that to give us content of incorrect sides quotes. Maybe it doesn’t fit with me going on and on about fics here. I don’t care. Follow them and turn on those notifications, please, because seeing even one post of theirs on your dashboard will make your day. It’s funny, it’s absurd, it’s chaotic, it’s making you jealous of them for having friends like that. Believe me, you will want to see those posts. It’s just… the random shots of serotonin and dopamine out generation needs really fucking desperately 100% of the time. 

That’s it with the list! Eleven creators I absolutely adore, and I’m sorry I was babbling so much all the way through, but… Well, actually I’m not sorry. And actually, half of the reason I even made this post is to tell them how much I love them and fangirl about them a bit. So… Yeah. Well.I love you guys and hope you’ll have a wonderful day! And to everyone else reading this: I hope this helped you ind some new creators you can enjoy. And a good day to you too, of cause.

Sincerely, Joy 🖤

(@joylessnightsky/@sanders-sides-fic)

[songbookff]

Valentine's j/7 ❤

I’m making this an established janeway/seven. Set whenever you want it to be. Also it turned out a waaaayyy longer than I thought...so I also posted it on A03. Thank you, anon. If you want me to gift you the fic on A03, just message me your username. Or if you want to stay anon, that’s fine too. 

In the early morning, Captain Janeway entered her office and went straight for her replicator. Coffee was calling. She gave the computer her normal order, but to her surprise, when her coffee appeared, so did a single red rose. 

Tentatively, she reached out to touch the vibrantly colored rose. Attached to the green stem was a note. It was odd, to see the cardstock, although replicated and the small ribbon that secured it in place. In printed script, it read: “Roses are red...” 

Kathryn pulled the rose up to her face, knowing that the scent was replicated, but reveling in it all the same. She turned away and made it halfway to her desk before she remembered that her coffee was still sitting in the replicator. Even a red rose couldn’t completely distract her from her morning cup of survival. 

Rose in one hand, coffee in the other, she slipped into her chair behind her desk, only to find a small bouquet of purplish-blue flowers. A blue ribbon tied the stems together and another note attached. This one read, “Violets are blue...” 

She set down the rose and her coffee (after a quick sip of course) and picked up the bundle. These felt different than the replicated rose. Katheryn’s eyes widened when she realized these were from Voyager’s own botanical gardens. They were real violets, not generated by the computer. They felt much more delicate than the rose and she could see the tiny imperfections of being grown rather than created. They were truly beautiful. 

After replicating a small vase with water to set them in, Kathryn tried to start her day. However, there was the faintest smile on her face and she was convinced her coffee tasted better this morning. Finally, she pulled up her data padd to review the reports from the night shift. When the padd turned on, a single message appeared, marked urgent. 

Odd. Usually urgent messages were reported by the computer so that she didn’t miss any when she was sleeping or off duty. She pressed open and the text read: “...I would like to spend dinner in the holodeck just with you.” 

This time, Kathryn didn’t attempt to suppress the smile. Whatever Seven was up to, she had gone out of her way to surprise her this morning. The poem sounded familiar now. It was an old Earth romantic ballad of sorts: “Roses are red, violets, are blue...” usually followed by a rhyming ending that expressed love and adoration. It was clever, really. 

And very unlike Seven of Nine. This of course, only intrigued Kathryn more. 

However, she did have a ship to run. So she pulled up the reports and began reading, trying not to let the beautiful flowers on her desk distract her. It seemed everything had been quiet the night before, so the reports were short. A blown fuse on deck three had been the only excitement of the night and had been resolved within a half hour. 

The door chimed after an hour, and she rose for her morning meeting with Chakotay. He entered the office was a pleasant smile, hands tucked behind his back. “Good morning, Captain.” 

“It has been...” admitted Kathryn with a smile. She couldn’t help but noticed he had a mischievous look in his eyes. “Chakotay, what’s going on?” 

“Can’t slip anything past you,” he chuckled. “Nothing new to report, although B’elanna claims to have come up with an idea to maximize our warp capacity by another percentage. I’ll be sure to have someone double check her math before she begins any experimentation. Although, Tom has volunteered to do the preliminary fight tests on the shuttle. So she can’t think it’s that dangerous.” 

“Just make sure Harry is there to monitor,” replied Kathryn with a smirk. 

“Will do. Also, I have been asked to make a delivery.” From behind his back, Chakotay produced a red box that had been formed in the shape of a geometric heart. He was grinning from ear to ear now, obviously in on whatever Seven was planning by the looks of the box he was holding out to her. 

Curiously, she took the box, surprised a little by the weight of it. Under Chakotay’s excited gaze, she opened it to find an assortment of tiny chocolates also shaped as hearts. They appeared to be different flavors and if she could guess, different fillings as well. 

“What is going on?” she repeated, astonished at the chocolates. 

Chakotay laughed and shrugged, innocently proclaiming, “I’m just they delivery guy. But I do have strict instructions that you are to try one before we get out on the bridge.” 

Chocolate wasn’t something she normally indulged in, especially not for breakfast, but the warm feeling in the pit of her stomach, knowing somehow this was all Seven’s design, forced her to comply. She picked a dark brown piece with a red swirl design and popped it into her mouth. 

“Well?” asked Chakotay, eyebrow raised in anticipation. 

“Dark chocolate with cherry. Absolutely delicious,” declared Kathryn. Then she let out a chuckle at the ridiculousness of the situation. She set the chocolates on the desk next to the rose and the vase she had put the violets in. 

Together, they exited her ready room to start the morning on the bridge. Her crew was bustling as usual. To be honest it had been a dull week, but after all the excitement they had recently, Kathryn was glad for the down time. There was maintenance to be done and the crew were rotating on new shifts to get some down time. So for the next hour, Kathryn read reports in the Captain’s chair, tuning out the business of the bridge. 

That is until Harry Kim was at her elbow. He cleared his throat and hesitated, “Captain...” 

“What can I do for you, Ensign?” asked Kathryn. Noticing the nervous expression on his face, she added, “What did Lieutenant Paris do now?” 

“I’m right here!” came the exasperated call from the helm. Tom whirled around in his seat, throwing his hands in the air. The tension broke and Harry managed a short laugh. 

“As you were,” ordered Kathryn. Tom turned back to his helm, but not before giving Harry a wink. 

“Captain, I need to borrow your badge...and your pips...”

“Excuse me?” 

“Just for a few minutes,” he hastily said. “I just need to upgrade the badge!” 

“And my pips?” Kathryn raised an eyebrow. Harry stood firm under her gaze and reached out his open palm. 

Chakotay leaned over in his chair and whispered, “Don’t interrogate the poor kid. Just give him what he asked for...” 

It suddenly dawned on Kathryn that this was another part of Seven’s elaborate plan. Of course, she had no idea what in the world Harry would do with her badge or rank, but wordlessly she plucked the badge from her chest and allowed Chakotay to help her unpin the four pips from her collar. 

Eagerly, Harry hustled away without another word. Amused glances were being exchanged between her bridge crew and she swore she saw Tuvok give Harry a nod of approval as he left the bridge. Kathryn spend the next half hour wondering what in the stars everyone was up to when Harry returned, velvet box in hand. 

Wordlessly, he handed it to her before scurrying back to his post at Ops. Chakotay was staring at the blur of stars on the viewscreen now, purposely giving her a moment of privacy. Kathryn opened the box to reveal her comm badge and four shining pips staring back at her. She hadn’t seen them this polished since they were new, well before Voyager had entered the Delta Quadrant. 

It wasn’t that she didn’t take care of her hardware, but keeping them shining was the last thing on her mind during most of the journey. But here they were, good as new. The badge gleamed too, no residual fingerprints any more. She pinned it back on and nudged Chakotay to help her put the pips back on her collar. 

Harry cleared his throat from Ops and she turned in her chair to face him. With the slightest red in his cheeks he said, “I think you’ll find I took care of the problem you were having with your badge sticking.” 

“Very good, Ensign,” was all she could think to say. For the past two weeks, she had been complaining that her badge needed to be hit twice on occasion to connect to the computer. If they were in Starfleet space, the comm badges would be replaced regularly so this wouldn’t happen. 

The rest of the morning went on as normal, although now Kathryn was wondering what else could possibly happened. Lunchtime came and she made her way to the Mess Hall. There were a few crew members already enjoying lunch. However, she reached the replicators, a voice called out. 

“Captain! Your lunch is already ready for you.” Standing behind her was Icheb, proudly holding a tray. “Today the kitchen has prepared a vegetable and bean stew with a side of crusty bread.” 

Icheb, still learning about human cuisine seemed unsure of what he was saying, but a steaming bowl sat atop the tray and a slice of toasted french bread rested on a napkin next to it. The stew was reminiscent of one that she had grown up eating, although it was usually replicated if she remembered correctly. It was a favorite of her father. 

“Thank you, Icheb,” she said politely, taking the tray from him. He gave her a quick nod before turning on his heal to go back into the kitchen. Kathryn gave a small shake of her head in amusement. What a day this was turning out to be...

The stew was tasty, if a little heavy on beans and the bread was as crusty as Icheb had said. Still, it was a good lunch, one she had not been expecting. As she wiped up the last of the stew with her bread, Naomi Wildman slipped into the chair across from her. 

“Hello, Captain.” The girl had a broad smile on her face. 

“How are you, Naomi?” asked Kathryn, wondering what Seven could have put the child up to. 

“I have something for you,” replied Naomi with excitement. From her lap, hidden from Kathryn’s view, she produced a small stuffed bear. It was brown with a red bow around the neck and wasn’t much bigger than Naomi’s hands. She pushed it over for Kathryn to grab and then slipped off the chair and skipped out of the Mess Hall. 

The bear was soft and fit perfectly into Kathryn’s grasp. The little thing made her smile, right there in front of the other members of the crew in the Mess Hall. Most were grinning back at her and now Kathryn was certain that the entire ship was in on Seven’s escapade. 

She took the bear back to the bridge with her and said nothing when Chakotay tried to cover a laugh at the sight of it sitting on the arm of her chair. She had no idea what had possessed Seven, or rather Naomi, to give it to her, but she enjoyed the little stuff thing. It was silly, but sweet. 

Two hours later, Tuvok called her attention, “Captain. I believe it is time to report to your quarters.” 

“I’m on shift for another three hours, Tuvok.” 

“I will escort you to your quarters.” The answer was firm and when she looked behind her, he had left his post and was waiting by the turbolift doors. 

Everyone on the bridge seemed to be determined to stare at their consoles and not look directly at her. Well, she had played along all morning, why stop now? With a sigh, she pushed herself out of the Captain’s seat and walked towards the exit. 

“Forgetting something?” asked Chakotay, holding up the little bear. He was failing miserably at keeping his face neutral.

“You have the bridge, Commander.” 

“Yes, sir.” 

Kathryn retrieved the bear with a roll of her eyes and then allowed Tuvok to escort her back to her quarters. “Tuvok, will you please tell me what is going on?”

“I have been sworn to the strictest of confidences.” He continued to look straight ahead. 

“I know Seven is behind all of this...but it’s interfering with my job now.” 

He didn’t answer until the reached her door and then he slowly turned and spoke, “I would never place you or this ship in any precarious situation. I assure you that this is in your best interest and should a situation arrive that would need your direct attention, I will be the first to summon you.” 

“Thank you, Tuvok.” He held up the Vulcan salute and then left her to enter her quarters. 

When the doors whooshed open, she could hear soothing music playing. The lights were dimmed and there was a large porcelain bathtub where her coffee table used to be. And Neelix was standing behind it, grinning from ear to ear. 

“Captain! Welcome to Neelix’s home spa treatment!” he greeted her with a grand motion of his arms.

“How...?” Kathryn glanced back at her closed door and then back at Neelix. 

“We were worried you may not have appreciated the intrusion. But I promise that I haven’t been in any of your personal belongings. I brought all my own things. Your table was the only thing removed.” He winked at her and then, like the showman he was, waved his hands dramatically and began by lifting a small bowl from the small table he had arranged next to the bath tub.“Today I have for you the most luxurious and moisturizing face cream that will leave you glowing and relieved.” 

Placing the bowl back down he reached for a bottle and wine glass also sitting on the table. Pouring the red liquid into in the glass, he said, “A top of the line red wine that comes from Earth, the French region, I believe. It is dry with a hint of blackberries and oak.” 

“And here,” he pulled a leather bound book from seemingly thin air, “Is your entertainment for the evening. A romance novel circa the twentieth century, for your enjoyment.” 

“All of this in what is called a ‘bathtub’.” Neelix motioned towards the tub with a sweep of his hand. “I made some adjustments to make it more comfortable. I have no idea how humans could stand sitting for long period of times with that shape. Seven wanted everything to be as historically accurate as possible, so we’ll just have to keep that secret to ourselves. The water will remain the most comfortable of temperatures for the human body and it has bubbles that give off the scent of lavender.” 

“Thank you?” Kathryn eyed the bathtub wearily and then back to Neelix. 

He had produced a plum colored robe and walked towards her. The silk was soft on her hands when she grasped the it. “I will leave you know. Just let the computer know if you need anything. Your next guest will be arriving at eighteen hundred hours to help you get ready for your dinner on the holosuite. The computer will give you a fifteen minute warning.” 

Neelix left with a wink and a smile, leaving Kathryn alone with the robe and bathtub. Self care like this wasn’t something she indulged in anymore. It made her a little uncomfortable at first, as she stripped off her uniform and put on the robe. 

A sip of wine helped relax her senses and she liberally applied Neelix’s face cream to her face. She figured that even if Neelix had somehow given her something that she was allergic to, the Doctor would be able to set it right. Once the face mask had been applied, she slipped off the robe and climbed into the tub. 

As she lowered her body into the perfectly warmed water, she found the modifications that Neelix had been talking about. Instead of the rounded bottom of the tub, she found a soft, almost cushiony chair, waiting for her to rest on. She sunk back against the porcelain with a sigh. 

After another sip of wine, she reached for the book. She hadn’t read it before, but it looked like something she would enjoy. It as written in the twentieth century, but appeared to take place in the eighteenth. Soon, she was entranced in the story, with nothing but the soothing music, warm water, and delicious wine to fill her mind. 

The computer chimed some time later, altering her that she needed to get out of the tub. There was a towel hanging from the edge of the tub that she used to dry off and then put the silky robe back on. The door chimed and she said enter without even asking who it was. 

To her surprise, B’Elanna burst through the door, a black garment bag slung over her shoulder. She took one look at Kathryn, frowned, and said, “What the hell do you have on your face?” 

Kathryn had completely forgotten about the face cream and hoped she wasn’t supposed to have removed it after a certain amount of time. “I’m not sure she admitted.” 

“Well, go wash it off while I get these out.” B’Elanna made a shooing motion while she walked over to Kathryn’s bed. Kathryn went into the bathroom to wash off the cream. To her relief, her face appeared to be fine. In fact, she felt light and refreshed. 

When she came back in, B’Elanna had laid two pieces of clothing on the bed. One was a dark green gown, with a lace pattern overlaid on the silken material on the chest. It was belted at the waist and floor length. The second was a light grey suit, with a silken green shirt beneath it that matched the dress. Both had obviously been tailored to her size. 

“I have no idea what Seven was thinking, putting me in charge of getting you dressed. So I got some opinions from the other women in the crew and we decided on these two. There is a bet going about whether you will pick the dress or the suit. I’m betting on the suit, so don’t let me down.” 

Both garments were beautiful, but B’Elanna was right, the suit was probably more her style. The dress was beautiful, but the thought of wearing it down to the holosuite for anyone to see made her uncomfortable. 

“I’ll wear the suit, but leave the dress.” Maybe later she could put it on just for Seven. 

B’Elanna clapped her hands together in triumph. “Alright, so Seven wanted this to be authentic, hence the real clothes, but I’m not a stylist. So I programmed the holodeck to do your hair and makeup when you enter. She’ll never know. And don’t worry, I am a firm believer that no one needs makeup, so it won’t be anything heavy.” 

If there was one person on this ship that Kathryn trusted wouldn’t overdo her hair or makeup, it was B’Elanna. “Thank you.”

“Alright, let’s get you into this thing. Wouldn’t want to keep the Borg waiting...” she grinned at her own joke and Kathryn rolled her eyes. It was a teasing that had been occurring since Kathryn and Seven had made their relationship public. 

The pants and shirt fit like a glove and B’Elanna helped her get the suit jacket on. B’Elanna stood back, admiring her work. “Huh. It does look good.” 

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” replied Kathryn sarcastically. “But seriously, thank you.” 

“Don’t mention it.” B’Elanna straightened her collar and added, “Seriously. Let’s never mention this again.” 

“Deal.” 

The two women left the Captain’s quarters and headed toward the holosuite. There weren’t too many crewmembers in the corridors. Kathryn wondered if they had been instructed to make themselves scarce or if everyone was just busy. Waiting by the holosuite was Tom Paris, bottle in hand, leaning against the bulkhead. 

Tom let out a whistle when Kathryn and B’Elanna approached him and his wife punched him in the shoulder for it. Kathryn only rolled her eyes. “Is that bottle for me?” 

“The finest champagne I could replicate. I did a little magic with the replicator to get around the safety features, that that there is the real deal. Harry and I tried a dozen just to make sure you got the best one. It’s authentic as you can get this far into the delta quadrant.” Tom handed her the bottle with a wink. Then he slung his arm around B’Elanna’s shoulder. “My fair lady, would you escort me back to our quarters. I seem to have lost my way.”

“How much did you drink, you idiot?” B’Elanna grabbed ahold of Tom and as they walked away, she called over her shoulder, “Have a good evening, Captain.” 

“Go get the girl!” shouted Tom, encouragingly. He let out a hoot that was quickly shushed by his wife. 

Bottle in hand, smile on her face, Kathryn entered the simulation. She walked into what appeared to be a countryside vineyard of old Earth. A single table for two was set on a stone patio that had fairy lights strung up in the air. A pair of candles lit the table on a white table cloth. Long stemmed champagne glasses were paired with white china plates. 

“Hello, Kathryn.” Seven of Nine walked out of the vineyard across from Kathryn. She was dressed in a beautiful, shimmering full length red dress. The neckline dipped to reveal just enough of her chest to make Kathryn blush. It was held up by slender straps and blonde hair was curled on her shoulders. The color was gorgeous and Kathryn was sure that her jaw dropped. 

“Seven...you look...” Kathryn gripped the neck of the champagne bottle tighter as she tried to find the right words. “You are beautiful.”  

“I am partial to the dress,” replied Seven, looking down at herself. “It is impractical, but I believe it has the desired effect.” 

“All of this is beautiful,” said Kathryn as she approached the table. “Today was been wonderful. Quite surprising, but wonderful.” 

“Your suit fits you well. I find that my attraction to you is heightened in that outfit.” Kathryn allowed herself to blush under Seven’s gaze. Seven motioned for her to take a seat. 

Suddenly, the Doctor, dressed in a tuxedo appeared out of thin air. “May I take that bottle from you, Captain?” 

“I...yes...” Kathryn handed it over, surprised by his appearance. He deftly popped the cork and poured out the two glasses as the women seated themselves. 

“Tonight, I will be serving a lobster linguine. We will begin with a light salad to prime the palate and then we will move to the main course. A decadent chocolate cheesecake will be served for dessert.” He gave them a smile and then snapped his fingers and the salads appeared on the plate in front of them. With another snap, he had disappeared. 

“Seven, what is all of this?” asked Kathryn. “Not that I don’t appreciate it, but I don’t understand.” 

“As you know, I have been studying Earth history to help reconnect with my humanity. I came across several holidays and traditions that have intrigued me. Some of them were based on religious or political movements of the time. I found one particularly of interest now that I am in a relationship with you. It is called ‘St. Valentine’s Day’. Have you heard of it?” 

A smile graced Kathryn’s face. “I have.” 

“I was confused by the history at first. There are conflicting thoughts on the origins of the holiday, but all seemed to be grim. However, it transformed into a day to celebrate lovers. When calendar dates were still being observed, it occurred annually on February fourteenth. I decided to make today Valentine’s Day for just the two of us.” Seven tilted her head to the side. “I thought it would be romantic.” 

“It is...” murmured Kathryn. She took another bite of salad. “I don’t know that much about the history of Valentine’s Day. I understood your poem this morning. I think it is a traditional Valentine.” 

“Yes. Roses and violets. Although, the name violets implies a purple color rather than blue, I did not correct it in order to continue the rhyme. I read that a dozen roses is a common gift, but a single red rose often implies more intimacy. Therefore, I provided a single red rose and a dozen violets.”  

“Chocolates are a traditional gift for lovers, even now. I can’t wait to eat the rest of them.” 

“I too am found of chocolates,” admitted Seven and Kathryn filed that information away for use at a later date. “Another traditional gift is jewelry. However, necklaces, bracelets, and rings are against the dress code. And you do not wear any off duty.” 

“So you had my pips and badge cleaned.” Her heartbeat quickened. Seven had thought all of this through. It really was romantic. Kathryn wasn’t sure she could love the woman more, but somehow, she still had the ability to surprise her. 

“Another common gift was stuffed animals. The Doctor explained that these are not taxidermized animals, but fluff stuffed fake figures. They are more commonly used by children for comfort. A ‘teddy bear’ is a traditional stuffed animal.” 

“It was cute,” laughed Kathryn and to her pleasure, she saw Seven’s eyes light up at her reaction. “The spa was nice, too.” 

“I am pleased that you enjoyed it.” Seven gave her a natural smile. Goodness, she was so beautiful, especially over candlelight. 

The Doctor cleared his throat to announce his return. He snapped his fingers and announced, “Dinner is served.” 

The salad plates disappeared and were replaced by a delicious looking pasta dish, topped with pieces of lobster. Breadsticks appeared in the middle of the table. Seven motioned to the food and explained, “Many references sourced traditional pasta from the Italian region of Earth was a common Valentine’s meal. Others reported that a home cooked meal that was nostalgic was also a good choice.” 

“So you made my father’s favorite stew.” 

Seven nodded. “You don’t have many favorites, but you talk about your family so often. I thought it would be the correct touch.” 

“It was perfect.” Kathryn reached across the table to take Seven’s hand in her own. “All of it was perfect.” 

“I believe the correct response would be that you are perfect. But I think that is incorrect. Everyone has flaws. It is in our nature.” Seven gave her hand a squeeze. “But I feel like you deserve to be treated with perfection, because I love you.” 

“I love you, too, Seven.” The candlelight twinkled in their eyes. 

“We should engage in eating this meal. My research says it will be pleasing to the palate,” added Seven with a tiny smirk. Kathryn laughed and picked up her fork to dig into the pasta. 

Seven was right, it was delicious. And so was the slice of cheesecake that they shared for dessert. When they were finished, the Doctor appeared again. “I hope you enjoyed your dinner tonight. If you will stand please, I will delete the table and leave you two ladies to enjoy the rest of your evening.” 

Both Kathryn and Seven rose to their feet. The Doctor snapped his fingers and the table disappeared. He gave them both a little bow and then snapped himself out of the simulation. Upon his departure, music starting playing. Soft, but with a dancing rhythm. Seven offered her hand and Kathryn accepted. 

The two began dancing, slowly turning on the stone patio together, beneath the moonlight and the tiny string of lights above them. Kathryn pulled Seven’s thin body tightly against her own. She dropped her face to press their cheeks together, breathing in the scent that was Seven. 

Kathryn loved being this close to Seven. They fit together so well. It was something that Kathryn had never experienced with anyone else. She loved the feel of Seven’s body against her own. 

“I am pleased that you are my Valentine,” whispered Seven in her ear. Kathryn smiled and pressed a kiss to Seven’s collarbone. 

Then she pulled back just enough to lock eyes with her lover. Gently, Kathryn raised her hand from Seven’s hip to cup her face. Then she firmly pressed their lips together. Beneath the moonlight, Kathryn kissed her Valentine. 

[ashintheairlikesnow]

Reunion: Kauri and Keira

CW: Kauri is surviving domestic violence, and he is still trapped in a lot of self-loathing and victim-blaming about it. Please stay safe, his thought processes can be fucky. Referenced noncon/dubcon. Electric shock treatment, frank discussion of domestic abuse with a robot.

The Colton referenced belongs to @shameless-whumper / @the-host-and-colton.

Tagging Kauri’s crew:  @maybeawhumpblog, @pepperonyscience, @haro-whumps, @18-toe-beans, @burtlederp, @finder-of-rings, @giggly-evil-puppy, @whimpers-and-whumpers, @moose-teeth, @whump-it, @lumpofwhump, @pumpkinthefangirl, @spiffythespook, @slaintetowhump

Kauri can feel the pain, buzzing relentlessly in his fingertips, long after Owen puts his phone away. Days later it’s still there, a heat along his collarbone, a constant reminder of the little metal circles, pretty little things with the tiny blue bits that look like inset glass. You’d never know what they were, if you didn’t already.

If Owen didn’t tell you.

He told everyone, though. Every-fucking-one. He sent photos to at least fifteen people of Kauri shirtless with his collarbone on display, tear tracks still drying on his flushed face, blue eyes red-rimmed from the pain, eyes slightly squinted against the headache that came on after the shocks had gone on so long. He sent them videos of Kauri collapsing to the ground as soon as the shock began, curling into himself, twitching and jerking and convulsing for one second, two seconds, three, four endless fucking seconds-

Then he stopped, and filmed Kauri, twitching, still leaning into his touch when he crouched to pet his hair, murmuring soothing comforting things into his ear, like it was real, like he really cared, and Owen had never really cared at all.

Part of Kauri was desperate to believe he still did. 

I can’t believe they didn’t come up with this sooner, this is amazing, Owen had all but crowed to the crying, curled up boy on his hallway floor, his thumbs flying over his expensive, paper-thin phone’s screen. Don’t worry, Kor-Bore. You look fucking gorgeous like that.

Kauri can’t remember if he’d even attempted to reply. His muscles had been contracting and releasing without his consent, without his input, aftershocks of familiar pain racing through his nerves. All he could do was leak tears and little hitching sobs onto Owen’s expensive floor.

He cried less from the pain than he did from who was inflicting it, the reality that the night he’d thought he was going to die hadn’t been enough to make Owen think he’d been punished. This had had to happen, too.

And he’d been… he’d been so good, right? Except for just the once. He’d done one thing wrong, just one single fucking thing. He’d been so good, he’d done everything Owen ever wanted. He’d learned every trick and seduction in training, he’d gone to Owen willowy and flexible, perfect for every single thing he wanted to do to him. He couldn’t say no when it mattered, when he wanted to. Half the time he didn’t even want to. He’d been good and obedient and loved him and he’d done it all right.

All he did was send one tiny little message. Just one. And… and he didn’t think Owen even knew about that, he’d never mentioned it. All of this - everything Kauri was living through - it was all because Owen had caught him reading.

The only thing he’d done to make Owen angry was read, like everyone else. Everyone got to read, but not Kauri. All he’d done was read what people were saying about him, and Owen… had done this.

He’d read those comments to the Host’s video, and sent a message to Colton. That was all he’d done. Not such big things, he thought, not really. Right? Just one teeny tiny little message. He didn’t even know what it was. He didn’t even get to remember why it had felt so worth it to tempt Owen’s anger. It wasn’t fucking fair. It wasn’t fair that Kauri had to live like this now and he didn’t even get to know why, and it must not have gotten back to Owen because the shock implants were all he’d done. 

One wrong step.

One moment where Kauri had moved out of line.

He’d fucked up just the once, exactly once in his time here, and Owen had nearly choked him to death, had hurt him over and over on the living room floor next to the laptop with its screen showing an argument in the comments, over how fucking lucky Box Boys were to get to live like this-

Now he sits on the little outside patio chair like he used to, but there’s no plants on the balcony and Keira is gone and Kauri is barely holding a scream back behind his teeth. Owen had promised new plants - you just made me so mad, Kauri, I couldn’t take it, you understand why I had to take it out on something.

He nods and he nods and he nods to the things Owen say, and his heart twists at Owen’s tears, and he wishes he’d never ever had a thought of his own at all. He’s better empty-headed. The bad things don’t happen when he doesn’t think. 

He can’t stop now that he’s started. He can’t stop thinking it was supposed to be better than this, somehow. That maybe - rebellious and thin as the thought is, and he’s scared to have it - maybe Colton was right.

Don’t believe their lies.

If he had, though, if he’d just believed everything he was told and trained to do… Kauri presses his hand against the little metal circles spaced evenly along his collarbone, feeling the low residual ache there, and bites his lower lip. If he’d just believed everything Owen said, he wouldn’t have had to go back.

This wouldn’t have happened.

Would that have been better?

He tilts his head back, looking up at the clear and perfect sky, thinking that he used to watch the stars, but tonight he feels like all he can see is the empty dark nothing between them. His fingers tap in rhythm on the arm of the chair, but he doesn’t know what he’s saying, he never knows what he’s saying, if he’s even saying anything at all. 

Tap tap tap. Tap taaaaaap. Tap tap tap taaaap tap.

Taaap taaaaap tap.

Kauri wants to throw the other chair over the balcony and shriek, tell the stars and the sky about how hard he tried to be good, how he had been everything Owen wanted from the moment he stepped out of his box. All he’d done was maybe think, for just a second, that he was allowed to have his own mind.

He knows better now, and it still won’t be enough for Owen to feel safe. Owen will never stop thinking that Kauri is going to walk out the door, no matter what he says or does or thinks or feels, he will never be able to make up for the fact that Vincent Shield walked out the door before.

He has to play second fiddle to someone he’s never met, someone who broke Owen in some fundamental way, and it’s not fucking fair.

Maybe Owen was broken before Vince. Maybe Vince was right to run, then, even if it led Owen straight to me.

He can’t be Vince, no matter that he’ll answer to his name in bed or when there are hands wrapped around his neck, tighter and tighter, cutting off air as his head slams back into the floor, black spots taking over the sight of Owen’s lips curled back from his teeth, the rictus of rage and grief on the handsome face that Kauri had been taught was safe, the owner is safe, even when he hurts you he’s safe.

He’s not safe at all, but there’s no way out of this, and Kauri is trapped living in fear and pain and betrayal and rage.

There’s a deep pain inside of him when he unfolds himself from the chair, a pain he is ignoring with gritted teeth, a pain he knows too well from training, from Owen’s anger. He was Vince for his owner again tonight - Owen drunk and slurring his words, and there are bruises on Kauri’s hips in the shape of Owen’s fingers as he moves back inside. The thick black collar from the Facility is still around his neck, he hasn’t earned the pretty new one yet. Maybe he never will.

It will never be enough.

He was made to be the replacement for someone he can never live up to. He isn’t good enough as himself. He’s stupid and brainless because Owen wanted him that way and it’s still not enough, to lose his thoughts and identity, to be trained in all the things Owen wants, it was never ever going to be enough.

Why couldn’t he just be happy with the life he was living? Why couldn’t Kauri just accept things as they are and stop trying to dream about dark eyes and hair, and something better? Why didn’t he keep his mouth shut when they filmed at the Host’s house, why didn’t he just-

Why… why couldn’t Owen just love him? Is he not worth loving, just as himself?

Kauri knows the answer to that question. Owen has told him before.

Kor-Bore, you’re sweet, but you’re a fucking empty space, you know? You don’t have a relationship with a fucking pet, man. I asked for brainless slut, and nobody’s going to love that. There’s nothing in there to love. It’s nice to pretend, though, isn’t it?

Yeah, Kauri thinks. Sometimes it was.

Kauri hiccups a sob as he stumbles to the couch, flinging himself onto it, feeling the soft give of the cushion under him, a deep teal that he adores. It’s his favorite color really, this saturated blue with just the barest hint of green.

Is it his favorite color? Or did Owen have them put that into his head?

There’s nothing in him to love. He’s a pale shadow of a different man, built to be a copy who can’t escape Owen’s hands, who doesn’t even want to. But Kauri wants to. There’s no way out but he wants a way out, he’d dig a tunnel with a fucking spoon if he could. There’s no way out of this at all.

Kauri cries himself out on the couch, as quietly as he can, careful not to wake Owen up. He tries to cry out all the anger trapped inside him, the hurt and the loneliness, the reality that it will never, ever be any better than this.

He lays down on his side, knees curled nearly to his chest, lets his arm hang off the side. His fingers drift along Owen's beautiful wood flooring. Tears dry into tracks on his face, like empty ancient riverbeds in deserts on Our Planet on TV. 

The ceiling fan spins overhead, a lazy movement. The world is still and silent at this hour, and Kauri has never felt so perfectly, utterly, wretchedly alone.

Then he blinks, lifting his head slowly as he hears a noise he doesn't recognize coming from under the couch. A kind of clicking, repeated, like something trying to turn and failing, again and again. He thinks of a skipping record player on High Fidelity, one of Owen’s favorite movies. He thinks of Gavin clicking his tongue against his teeth in the Honor Bound movie.

“What…?” His voice is trembling from the tears that are still locked inside him. He could never cry long enough to get them all out. 

The clicking continues, and Kauri swallows, pushes himself over the edge, and hangs his head upside down to look under the couch, wild black curls just brushing the floor.

Two glowing red dots stare back at him from the darkness under the couch.

Kauri reassurance require?

“Wh-what the fuck-... Keira?” Kauri sniffs and twists off the couch, landing with a thump on the floor, digging his arm under the couch frantically until he finds the familiar round metal and plastic shape. He grips onto her, feeling a kind of hysterical laugh wanting to bubble up his throat, swallowing reflexively to keep it down as he scrapes her a little along the floor and finally has her back in his arms.

Kauri rolls onto his back between the couch and coffee table, holding her tightly against his chest, eyes slowly closing. “You’re, y-you’re, you’re not dead?”

There’s a pause, the little clicking he understands now is the sound of a broken wheel on one side. Keira initiate shutdown procedure, set variable Kauri sound. Current power at thirty-two-point-twelve percent.

A bit of plastic nudges under his chin as he holds her even tighter, new tears welling and coming out of the corners of his closed eyes, running down to pool in his ears, to drip onto the ground beneath him. He hitches in a breath, feeling the constriction of the wide leather collar, the weight of Keira on his chest, the way she feels so perfectly familiar in his arms.

Kauri reassurance require?

“Y-yes,” Kauri whispers. “Yes, I, I need… Kauri reassurance require, Keira.”

Keira reassurance provide.

“I fucked up so bad, Keira, I’m so sorry he hurt you-”

Kauri pain sound. Kauri fear sound. Keira maintains memory. Kauri good.

“N-no, I w-w-wasn’t, I did something I wasn’t supposed to do, I, I fucked up and I made him so mad-”

Kauri good. Keira reassurance provide.

“I don’t… feel good.”

Kauri good.

How long they laid there, Kauri didn’t know. She was warm, the wires and everything inside of her felt like a person’s heat laying on top of him, warming him as much from the inside as out. 

“I missed you,” He whispers into the dark room, to the glowing red dots that he thinks always as Keira’s eyes. Her little broken wheel clicks once, twice, three times more. “I was all alone and I m-missed you so much, I just-... I can’t… I can’t-”

Keira present. Kauri Grant, Owner. 

“M-Mr. Owen’s your-”

Override code accepted. Kauri Grant, owner.

He can’t remember it very well. Had he given her the override code? Maybe he had. Kauri rolls onto his side, clutching her tightly, crying into the hard metal that feels, to him, like arms around him, like someone he loves holding him tightly. 

It’s the closest he’ll ever have again to that feeling, and Kauri curls himself around the delusion, tells himself that it’s almost like Keira is real.

Like someone in the world loves him.

Like anyone in the world ever could.

“I can’t fuck up again,” He whispers. “I can’t ever fuck up again. He could have killed me.”

Kauri fear sound, Keira says solemnly. Kauri afraid.

“Yes,” Kauri says hoarsely. “I’m so scared, Keira. I’m so, so scared, and I’m so unhappy, and I hate it here and I hate him so much-” He catches his breath at the lance of pain through his rebellious, aberrant thoughts, but doubles down and buries his head against her softly rounded edges. “I hate him,” He whispers. “I hate him I hate him I hate him I hate him.”

He pauses, lets the moment draw out, breathes against the pain until it fads. 

“I love him,” He adds, in an even softer voice. “I love him so much and I just w-wanted him to love me back. I just wanted-... I just-... couldn’t be good enough, Keira, I want… I want someone else.”

Owen Grant laptop unlocked. Kauri could have sworn Keira’s metallic voice sounded smug. He slowly raised his head to look up at Owen’s laptop sitting on the coffee table, screen up.

It was on. 

“... did you turn Mr. Owen’s computer on?” He asked, slowly pushing himself up onto his knees. “I didn’t know you could-”

Error code 4563453AI AI limiter chip malfunction. 

“I don’t know what that means.” Kauri stares in outright shock as he watches, watches, the little circles fill in Owen’s password, opening up his laptop to the main screen. He swallows, hard, curling into himself while Keira works, a low hum coming from within her. Guilt twists in his chest - he’s not supposed to look, ever again, not ever again - but some part of him can’t bear to stop her.

Keira has no limitations. Kauri reassurance require. Keira memory retained last Kauri happiness moment.

The internet browser opens on Owen’s computer and Kauri flinches his head to the side to avoid accidentally reading any of the words. He can hear Owen’s low snoring all the way out here - he must have rolled onto his back.

“K-Keira, we have to be careful, we have to be-... so careful, I shouldn’t-”

Keira reassurance provide. Keira provide Kauri happiness moment.

A familiar face pops up on the screen, holding a chef’s knife, smiling shyly, the frozen screenshot before the video starts. The cursor of the mouse moves quickly and with perfect efficiency across the screen to click PLAY.

Out-of-focus, a deep masculine voice says, “Um, hey guys-”

“Keira, I’m not supposed to-... I shouldn’t be thinking about-”

Kauri Grant, Owner. Keira reassurance provide Kauri Grant, Owner. Kauri good. Kauri happiness moment.

“Is that, um, ‘focused’?” The voice says on the laptop’s screen. Shot of slippered feet and legs clad in familiar sweatpants. Kauri catches his breath. “I, um, they just taught me how to use this and um-”

Kauri heartrate increasing, Keira says, that note of smugness in her voice again. Kauri blood distribution adjustment. 

“Keira, you have to turn this off right now, I’m not allowed to watch him alone anymore, I’m not, I’m not allowed to even think about him-”

Shy smile, dark eyebrows and hair, the face he sees when he closes his eyes and pretends he’s somewhere else, with someone else, when he replaces Owen’s voice with another one, a deeper voice, moves his body with the image of different hands, longer fingers, a different shape to the jaw when he puts his hands on either side of his face. 

It’s the same as the shy smile with cold fingers pressing a hot mug of coffee into his hands as he stares at the snow on the ski trip. 

Kauri’s protests die away, and he sits slowly back, resting against the couch and staring at the laptop screen, blue eyes wide.

Kauri reassured?

“Kauri reassured,” Kauri says, lips barely moving, his eyes locked on the screen. “It… it won’t hurt to watch just one… right?” 

He swallows, hard, and watches the screen. The dreams the white room tried to lock away, the hopes that died under Tyler and Delevigne’s tiny scalpels, the resignation that settled in when the Director herself visited his recovery room to press on the shock implants just to hear his whimper of pain, the awful screaming rage that has lived inside of him since the moment he realized that Owen was going to break the only promise he had ever made-

All of the anger fades, in the moment. The hopes and the dreams whisper from the back of his mind that they aren’t dead, only sleeping. Waiting. Still there for him to have.

There are places Kauri goes, Keira says. He barely hears her, only nods. There are people who help Kauri. Keira memory storage including safehouse locations within 500 miles of current location accepting human pets.

“Safehouses?”

Kauri could leave. The voice is lower than before, as if even the Roomba can tell that it’s something Kauri’s mind isn’t allowed to linger on. 

He shakes his head, rapidly, before the headache can settle in. Even still, he can’t look away from the screen. “I… I can’t. I can’t ever leave him.” 

Kauri leaves soon. “Abusers typically escalate when they feel they are losing control over the relationship, often because they feel that the independence of their partner has increased in some way or that their partner will leave.”  National Domestic Violence Hotline source.

“I-I can’t. The things he put in me hurt if I get too close to the door, I l-love him, I… I-” Kauri admits the unthinkable, finally, speaking words out loud he’s only ever thought before. “If I leave, he’ll kill me. I f-fucked up and he nearly, he could have-”

“If you are experiencing escalation and your partner has threatened to kill you-”

“He’s not my partner,” Kauri says, some part of him cracking apart and shattering under the weight of that statement. “He’s my owner.”

“-it is important to develop a safety plan that can help you and your family survive.” National Domestic Violence hotline source.

“Why do you keep quoting them?”

The video ends, and Kauri watches the little circle fill before the next one begins. 

Accuracy. 

 “I don’t have a family.”

Keira reassurance provide.

“Are… are you saying you’re my family?” 

Kauri good. Keira retain safehouse information. The laptop exited the internet browser as quickly as it had opened it, turned the computer off. Kauri sat frozen, watching Keira control Owen’s laptop with wide, slightly blind eyes. Kauri good. Kauri good. Keira reassurance provide.

“How… how do I go?” He whispered. But she didn’t have to answer that. Kauri knew the answer, deep within himself. 

He needed a plan. 

Then he needed to wait for his chance, and when it came, he would have to be able to take it. Until then…

He was going to have to remember, at least for Owen, that he was supposed to be so fucking lucky.

He pushed himself to his feet, padding soundlessly through the condo looking until he found Keira’s charging station shoved into the back of the closet in Kauri’s discipline room and forgotten. Kauri kept his eyes carefully away from his box and from the discipline tools laid out, plugging the charger in while keeping it hidden in the closet, slipping Keira into her docking station, laying a hand on the warmth of her plastic and metal body.

“I’m so glad you’re still alive,” He said, quietly, his voice caught with tears.

Keira pleased Kauri safe.

“Not safe. But here.” Kauri gave her a final pat on the head.

In the bedroom, Owen shifted around, and Kauri jumped when he called, “Kor-Bore? Where are you?” His voice was slurred with sleep, hazy with some kind of desire. Kauri swallowed back a twisted mix of desire and love and disgust and hate, and stepped back into the hallway and into the bedroom, looking at Owen with a slight smile.

The smile didn’t reach his eyes.

It never had.

Owen never noticed.

“Right here, Mr. Owen,” Kauri said softly, pitching his voice low, almost teasing. “Needed water.”

“Come back t’bed,” Owen said, holding out his arm.

Kauri kept his smile set on his lips and slid into the bed, let his body take over and his thoughts drift to a safer place in the back of his mind. 

He was so lucky Keira hadn’t been found and thrown away, or broken so badly she was gone, or reset to factory settings. He was so lucky Keira had information he could use, had held onto it, could control Owen’s computer to help him. 

He was so lucky Keira cared. That anyone cared, ever, about him at all. Maybe he could… watch more videos, at night, when Owen was sleeping. Maybe he could take the time to make a plan. 

He was… he was so fucking lucky he might have a chance to get past the locked door.

[jiminniethemarshmallow]

Unresolved Issues (M)

Pairing: Taehyung x OC

Genre: Smut, angst I guess? 

Word count: about 27k

Warnings: dom!Tae, bratty reader, a tiny bit of spanking, light choking, Tae fingering reader with his gorgeous hands, dirty talk

(A/N): This is for the BSC summer project! Thanks so much to @ironicarmy @jhspetitegf and @sugadrms for being amazing group members, I really had fun brainstorming and working with you guys. I suggest reading all 4 of our scenarios for this project because they overlap and connect quite a bit and it might be confusing if you don’t! Happy reading 😊

Project Masterlist

Summary: Kim Taehyung has always been the insufferable idiot who you can barely tolerate, even as one of his friends. Due to some meddling from your friends, you end up rooming with him on the trip and bonding with him in a way you’ve failed to do in the years you’ve known him, but what happens when you accidentally discover his feelings toward you?

Coffee shops are one of your favorite places to be. The scent of ground beans and baked goods, soft music playing in the background, the general quietness, it’s all so calming to you, and the soothing atmosphere is enough to pull you out of your groggy, disgruntled mood this morning as you push open the door and greet your friends with a silent smile and a wave. After stopping by the counter to order the usual: a medium mocha frappe with extra chocolate sauce on top (you’re a simple girl), you head over and take a seat next to Namjoon and Hoseok, accepting their greetings and small talk.

“You’re late.” You look up to find Taehyung and Jimin sitting across from you with their arms crossed over their chests, eyes narrowed in your direction— though Taehyung’s eyes aim a little lower than your face.

“It’s not my fault that my mother decided to have a rare “parenting moment” and give me a 20 minute speech on safety and boys on my way out the door. And I’m not late.” Your eyebrow arches in defiance, basically having a staring contest with Taehyung as he holds his stance, Jimin having already dropped the act.

“You’re not late, Faye, you’re right on time!” Zoe, Jin’s girlfriend and the mother figure of the group, checks the time on her phone for what you will guess is the hundredth time in the last 10 minutes. She can be a bit neurotic at times, always needing to plan everything to the very last detail, but you love her regardless and honestly admire her dedication and effort with those types of things. It seems like a lot of work. “Now we’re just waiting on Jungkook.”

At the mention of his name, Sooyun shifts in her seat uncomfortably, playing with the sleeve on her cup. You note the way she nibbles on her lip in thought as she glances repeatedly at the door. You know her well enough to find it obvious that something happened between the two of them, but you won’t say anything unless she wants to tell you. Sooyun is one of the first real friends you made in high school, one of the first people who didn’t treat you like an asshole and actually approached you with kindness instead of passing you off as the quiet, weird, artsy girl that always seemed to lurk on the sidelines. She’s the main reason you’re in this friend group, her generally social personality led to her making many acquaintances and friends, which in turn led to you befriending those people as well since you mainly only hung out with her. These friends include Namjoon and his boyfriend Hoseok, Jungkook, Jin, Zoe, Jimin, and his best friend Taehyung.

Kim Taehyung. The clumsy, air-headed, childish asshole that you begrudgingly call your friend. When you first met him, you absolutely despised him. He was the class clown in your 9th grade gym class and never took a single thing seriously, cracking jokes at every convenience and disrupting the class with his obnoxious behavior. It’s a wonder how you haven’t killed him yet. He seems to take pleasure in pressing your buttons, which you have a quite a few of, and even though you know he does it on purpose, you can never seem to control your temper with him. The only reason you even attempt to tolerate him is because you have a soft spot for Jimin and his manggae cheeks, therefore, you are obligated to accept his best friend. Don’t get me wrong, Tae is one of your closest... “friends”... and you know a lot about each other, but that doesn’t mean that your annoyance toward him has lessened at all.

You sit back and watch as conversation continues among your group, everyone listening to Zoe as she briefs you all on what she has planned for the trip— apparently she printed out a schedule with possible group activities and events. You try your hardest to ignore Taehyung as he spreads himself out across from you, manspreading beyond belief and spewing nonsense as usual. Jimin agrees with nearly every stupid idea that he comes up with and you can’t help but roll your eyes at the pair of them, not missing the wink Taehyung sends your way when he catches your annoyance. At some point Zoe starts to freak out about Jungkook not being here and Jin comforts and reassures her with strong arms wrapped around her waist. You’ve never been big on sappy couples, but you have to admit, they are absolutely, undeniably adorable together. It’s amazing to you how they’ve been together for so long already and have stayed virgins. You aren’t even a virgin and you can hardly say that you’ve had any “real” boyfriends, but you digress. That’s honestly none of your business.

“I’m here!” Jungkook bursts through the door clumsily and Zoe takes the time to scold him while you gather your suitcase and prepare to stand up. A man at the front counter appears with a cup and calls out your name and you depart the table abruptly to claim it, bag in tow. Leaning on the counter, you address the man with a smile, and take the drink with you name on it.

“Finally got my name right.” You beam, grabbing a straw from the dispenser and opening it with your teeth.

“Oh! Let me fix that for you,” He grabs his marker and crosses out your name, rewriting it as “Fade” instead, laughing when you blow the paper straw wrapper at him. “I’m gonna miss not seeing you here every week, Faye.”

“Yeah, me too. I always had the best times here, I’m going to miss hanging out here with my friends.” You frown. Recently, you’ve been feeling rather nostalgic and now everywhere you go you feel a rush of memories and then a brief sadness. Yes, you are moving on to bigger and better things, but you’re going to miss this life. As you share saddened looks with the barista, a sudden presence slides up beside you and your face hardens. “I definitely won’t miss this one, though.” You point with your thumb.

“Hello, Kai.” Taehyung’s voice deepens the way it does when he’s trying to seem intimidating, his eyes staring back and forth between you and your acquaintance.

“Hello, Taehyung.” He responds with the same energy and you feel Taehyung shift an inch closer to you causing you to move your arm so they don’t touch.

“Flirting with customers again, are we?” Taehyung’s thick eyebrow raises quizzically and Kai blushes, though he holds his ground.

“Invading other’s personal space again, are we?” You snort at this, earning a smirk from the man across the counter.

“Is it illegal for a guy to talk to a woman without having an ulterior motive? Not everyone is like you, Tae.” You cut him a steely look and he sucks his teeth.

“You don’t know what his motives are, the guy clearly likes you.”

“I’m standing right here...” Kai mentions, heat radiating off of his face from your lack of reaction.

“Yeah, but at least he’s not a dickhead like you.” Before he can open his mouth to say anything, you grab your luggage and turn away. “Everyone’s about to leave without us, let’s go. Bye, Kai! I promise I’ll visit again before I go off to school!” You wave back at him, noticing how his eyes follow you all the way out of the door and how Taehyung looks back at him menacingly once more before he exits the building. You throw your bag into the trunk of Jin’s car and plop down in the back seat, groaning when Taehyung slides in on the other side of Jimin. “Why can’t you go in the other car?”

“I want to sit with my best friend.” He pats Jimin’s shoulder with a toothy grin. “What, is it illegal for me to ride in the same car as you?” He mimics your voice from earlier and you choose not to say anything back, turning your head toward the window to hold your tongue. Instead, you just shake your head and slip on your headphones, turning on your road trip playlist and pulling out your notebook. It wasn’t too long of a ride to the lake house by your standards, maybe an hour or two, and you planned on occupying yourself the entire way to avoid having to actually engage in conversation this early in the morning. Once everyone is in place, Jin pulls out of the lot and leads the way, Jungkook’s car following closely behind as your journey begins.

Taehyung stares at you in intrigue, thick eyebrows knit as he studies you. Your lilac, chin-length hair shifts in the wind around your soft face, pushed behind one ear when it threatens to obstruct your view. Your deep eyes are cast down, focused on the pencil that strokes fluidly across your notepad before flicking upward to take in the scenery, drawing lines that will magically connect into a beautiful masterpiece. He’s seen you do it many times, completely relaxed in your hunched over posture as you look on objectively at your surroundings, copying down everything that you see at a glance. You’re a pretty girl— not that that determines your value— and you’ve got talent and intelligence that will take you far in life and he admires that about you, always so observant and collected. Never cocky, but still confident, yet quiet at the same time. And you just look so peaceful and natural right now.

“The fuck are you looking at?” You hiss. Behind your deceivingly calm demeanor is a sharp tongue. Your whip-like wit is something to behold and it’s almost always targeted at him. You could feel him looking at you before you even looked up, he’s not very subtle. You suspect that most of the reason his eyes have landed on you is because of the strapless top you’ve elected to wear that shows off the slightest bit of cleavage, and now he can’t take his eyes off you. Pervert. He looks completely unbothered when you catch him, barely batting an eye.

“You have a booger in your nose.” He points across Jimin, and you smack his hand out of the way, not even needing to take off your headphones to know what he’s said. “What are you even drawing? There’s no way you can see anything long enough to draw it.”

When you don’t reply, he leans closer to see, nearly smashing the poor boy stuck between you two. “Tae, Jesus, let me breathe.” Jimin whines, pushing him away. “If you’re going to be like this then maybe we should switch seats so I don’t have to be in the middle of whatever’s going on here.”

“No!” You say a little too loudly, causing Zoe to turn around in the passengers seat.

“You two better not argue the whole way up here.” She frowns, glaring at the two of you.

“I’m literally just sitting here in silence, trying my best to ignore him and draw, why am I being yelled at?” You sigh, increasing the volume of your music to increase your skills at ignoring him.

“Don’t worry, I’m sure they’ll have plenty of time to talk out their problems on the trip.” Jin snickers, receiving another striking look from Zoe and a high pitched giggle from Jimin. Taehyung looks around, clearly lost (as always), but no one says anything further, so he asks.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“Jin, we weren’t supposed to tell them until we got there!” Zoe says through her teeth, as though the two of you couldn’t hear her.

“Can someone please tell me what’s going on?” At Taehyung’s second attempt, you pause your music and listen in, intrigued with what was so important that they felt the need to hide it from the two of you. “Jimin?”

“Don’t ask me, I wasn’t the one who spilled the beans.” Jimin holds his hands up in defense, not willing to get his head bitten off by Mother Hen in the front seat who seems to avoid your eyes at all costs. This time, you’re the one to ask and she finally gives, sighing before sinking into her chair.

“We all decided who wants to room together at the coffee house and everyone agreed that you and Tae should stay in the same room.” When she breaks the devastating news, the whole car is silent for just a split second before you erupt.

“I’m sorry, what?! You didn’t. You did not. You. Did. Not.” Zoe simply nods at your disbelief, folding her hands in her lap innocently as Jin chuckles beside her. The longer you stare at her, however, the more nervous she becomes until she feels like the air should be broken somehow.

“Don’t look at me, it was Jin’s idea!” She immediately throws him under the bus, his jaw dropping in shock.

“Babe!”

“It was! And you’re the one who brought it up! We weren’t even supposed to tell them.” As they fuss about blame and who said what, you’re left in the back, shell-shocked. You and Taehyung. Spending a weekend in the same room. Together. You think you’re going to be sick.

“You guys decided rooms without us?” Tae finally speaks up, not looking nearly as disturbed as you thought he should be.

“Because they were plotting against us, that’s why.” Breaking out of your trance, you point an accusatory finger at Jin’s seat in front of you, wishing you could shoot lasers out of your eyes. Then you turn to the man beside you who finds the whole situation funny. “Jimin, why aren’t you rooming with Taehyung? I thought you were best friends!”

“We are, but I don’t think we make good roommates.”

“But we do?!” An immediate headache forms behind your eyes and you rub at your face. You’re ready to jump out of your seat, but then you remember that you are currently in a moving vehicle. You hate that you’re this flustered over such a small detail, but you can’t think of a worse torture than spending your nights in the same room as that buffoon. And when you look over at the dumb look he has on his face, you start to regret this trip before it’s even begun.

“We are not changing rooms now, it’s already been decided. You guys need to learn how to get along at some point and this is the perfect way to do it. I don’t know why you hate each other, but I’m tired of you arguing all the time, so you either talk it out, or I’m excluding you from all of the fun activities I planned. C’mon, this should be easy. No one bonds faster than roommates!” Not even you can argue with her after Zoe puts her foot down. You can tell she’ll be a great mother when the time comes, if she ever gets around to doing the deed with Jin. She ends with a tight, demanding smile and you resist the urge to dry heave at the thought of what’s to come.

“So, what you’re telling me is that this was all a set up?” She doesn’t reply to your question and you close your notebook in despair. “Why are you trying to ruin my life?”

“I live for the drama,” Jin gloats once you’ve given up, chancing a glance in the rear view mirror to see your expression. “I thought this trip could use a little excitement. You’re welcome.” He shrugs, chaotic as always.

“I’m glad you find this entertaining.” You’re absolutely drained, feeling like the life has been sucked from your face. You can’t even draw anymore, all of your previous energy and high spirits going straight to Hell, the same place you hope Jin ends up. For the rest of the ride up you sit in misery, listening to your music and wallowing in your misfortune as you tune out the other conversations. You don’t know how Taehyung is taking the news, but what you do know is that if you see his face at all before you get to the lake house, you might just jump out the window.

The lake house is right on the water, beautiful wood and stone architecture that blends in nicely with the nature and trees that surround it. This house is huge, easily able to accommodate your group, and you admire the details when you pull up into the driveway. The first thing you notice are the windows, large and numerous, exposing many parts of the house to natural light. It’s beautiful and if you weren’t so angry right now you would definitely draw it. You’ll have to come out here one day and sketch this in your notebook.

Zoe spends an entire 5 minutes talking about house rules and going over her precious schedule so “everyone knows what we’ll be doing this weekend.” Your take away from her speech is that drunk swimming is strictly prohibited, no one is allowed to go off into the woods alone without telling anyone, and to basically not destroy Jin’s family’s nice vacation home or you’ll be paying for damages. Half of you aren’t even listening— including Jimin, who is too enraptured in the task of taking selfies in front of the house, and Taehyung, who is zoned the fuck out and probably has no clue what is going on— and the few of you who are paying attention only nod silently in agreement to everything she says. As soon as she stops talking, you’re on the move, wanting nothing more than to relax inside.

“What’s up with her?” Jungkook comments in passing when you snatch your bag from Jin’s trunk and stomp past him.

“We told them about the rooms.” Jimin answers, nodding in confirmation at the boy’s wide eyes before pushing past to make a run for the bathroom inside.

“Guys, wait here, I have something to show you.” Jin runs inside the house without further context, leaving the rest of you standing outside in confusion.

“Hurry up!” Taehyung calls, leaning against the closed trunk of the car. The sound of his voice makes you want to punch him just to relieve your frustration.

A minute later, Jin emerges from the house, followed by another man whom you had never seen before. He stands a little bit shorter than Jin, handsome face blank behind his black bangs, yet he looks friendly enough. “This is Yoongi! He’s my parents’ new android, he’s gonna be helping us out this weekend.”

You stare for a few seconds, taking in his words. An android? You had no idea that people were actually purchasing those. You’ve seen ads on tv for them, everyone going crazy over the newest innovations in A.I. and android tech, but those things cost a fortune so you assumed nobody had them. On second thought, it makes perfect sense that Jin’s parents would buy such a costly... appliance... person-thing. They’re certainly rich enough. Yoongi greets each of you individually, shaking your hands and asking for everyone’s names. He looks so life-like, you could forget he wasn’t made of real flesh and bone. Jin explains the details of how Yoongi functions, how he takes commands because his job is essentially to be the groundskeeper for the lake house, but that he is fully conscious and self aware, which means that he can function socially.

“That’s so cool!” Namjoon gushes, his nerdy side coming out as he moves to inspect the “man” in front of you. After the novelty of the introduction wears off, you are the first to head inside, too hot and irritated to listen to Taehyung complain about not wanting to carry Jimin’s bag in for him. You walk in to find Jimin walking around the spacious bottom floor, jaw hanging low as he looks at all the fancy decorations and appliances that fill the home. You could tell him that he missed Yoongi’s introduction, but you’re still pissed off at him.

“Wow, I can’t believe we’re staying here!” He sounds like an excited puppy, making it a point not to miss a single detail in his path.

“I can’t believe you’re making me stay in the same room as Taehyung.” You say bitterly, pressing the button to the elevator even though the stairs are right there. He doesn’t even spare you a glance.

“I’m gonna make sure we make good use of the bar back there,” You roll your eyes as he continues making plans by himself, mostly talking about getting drunk and doing stupid things around all of this expensive furniture. You can only shake your head at him.

Everyone moves their bags into your agreed upon rooms, Jin with Zoe, Hoseok, Jimin, and Jungkook staying together, Sooyun with Namjoon, and Yoongi getting his room by himself. And of course, you and Taehyung. You plead with Jin to switch you with Yoongi and let you have the single room, to no avail, and spend the rest of the time unpacking and sulking, avoiding Taehyung at all costs. You’ll be over it in a couple of hours, you’re sure, but for now, you just want to sit and wallow in your gloom.

“Hey, it’s not that bad, we can-“

“Stop. I don’t want to hear it.” You shut him down immediately, back facing him and jaw clenched as you stuff clothing into the drawers of your dresser. You aren’t particularly upset with him, this isn’t his fault, but he definitely isn’t making the situation any better.

“What the fuck are these?” Walking over, Taehyung reaches into your small luggage bag, pulling out a pair of your most comfortable panties, a pair of boy shorts with cute little bears on them. “Aw, you act all tough, but you’re really just a big softy, huh?” He pouts, doing his famous aegyo that makes you want to throw your shoe at him, so you do.

“Put those down! Not all girls wear lingerie all the time, Tae, some of us actually like to be comfortable.”

“No, I like them. Bears suit you: cute and fluffy on the outside, mean and vicious once you get close to them.” He easily dodges the other shoe you throw.

“I am not mean.” How dare he say that about you, of all people. He’s the one who deliberately tries to piss you off, so much so that it’s gotten to the point that you get irritated if he even breathes in your direction.

“Oh yeah? Says the girl that just threw her shoes at my head.” A cocky little smirk crawls on his lips when you fume, ready to stand up and just say ‘fuck it’ and fight him. But you won’t. And you never will. He knows this, and that’s what makes him that much more insufferable.

“Fuck off.”

“See! Why can’t you be nice for once? We’re going to be sharing this room whether you like it or not, so we might as well try to be cordial with each other.” He looks on as you stare at him in silence, considering his offer shortly before scoffing and turning back to continue filing away your clothes.

When Taehyung leaves to go to the bathroom, you quickly dig into your bag for the embarrassing amount of condoms your mother stuffed into the side pocket, gathering them in one of your caps and stepping out into the hall. Everyone’s doors are open thankfully, so you walk down the hall like a flower girl and throw handfuls of condoms into each doorway.

“What the hell?” Namjoon sticks his head out of the door to find you walking back down the hall nonchalantly, holding the last few in one hand. “Umm?” You turn, shrugging.

“I don’t need ‘em.”

Hoseok pops his head out of the room across from his boyfriend, carrying a bunch of them in his arms. “Thank you!”

Yoongi’s door is at the end of the hall and you knock before entering, finding him opening the curtains a little wider to let in the sunlight. You stand there silently for a moment, taking in his appearance. He truly looks like a human, it’s crazy. He stands at the window, watching the birds and the leaves and the breeze and you wait a few long moments before disturbing him. “Yoongi?” He turns quickly at attention, as if waiting for instruction. “Do you want some condoms?”

“Condoms?” He questions, and you’re not sure if he knows what those are.

“Yes?” You hold them out and he approaches, picking up a package to inspect it. Can androids even have sex? You wouldn’t know.

“Yes, of course I’ll take some condoms because I’ll definitely need them.” He says with a completely straight face, adding an eye roll at the end. Did he just give you sarcasm? Jin did say he’s advanced, maybe you should try to be more comfortable around him. You’ve never met anyone rich enough to own an android so this is your first interaction with one aside from what you’ve seen on tv.

“Well I don’t need them. I was just offering.” Despite his comment, he takes them from your hand with a smile.

“I appreciate your thoughtfulness. You should keep one, too. Never know what might happen.” You nod at his advice, keeping one for yourself even though you highly doubt you’ll be needing it.

It’s later now, the sun nearly all the way set, casting the most lovely shades of orange, pink, and even purple across the sky, the water reflecting it so beautifully. You couldn’t imagine a prettier sight and you wish that you had your paints with you so you could capture this landscape, but a simple photo will have to suffice. Looking out over the water, you stand alone on the patio as everyone gets ready inside, preparing food and other snacks and necessities for your movie night under the stars. Zoe’s idea of course, but you have no complains about her plans. Just then, Tae walks up and stands beside you, hands in the pockets of his shorts as he takes in the view.

“I saw this exact thing in a dream once,” He starts, and you’re already shaking your head for him to stop, mentally begging him not to ruin this perfect moment. “It looked just like this, except I was on a boat and I was getting my dick sucked by that girl in our history class.” You take in a deep breath, eyes shut while you collect yourself, and then you decide it’s not worth saying anything to that and simply walk back inside to help the others. “I don’t know why she was there, I didn’t even like her like that!” He tries to justify, but you’re already gone.

“Faye! Come help me at the grill!” Sooyun waves you over, standing over the fancy appliance after Jin helps her turn it on, heading back into the kitchen. It looks like something you would see on a cooking show, top notch equipment and cooking utensils, cleaned spotlessly.

“That rich motherfucker,” You shake your head in disbelief. “Who even owns stuff like this? I bet this one grill is worth enough to pay my college tuition.” You laugh, helping her place food on the racks.

“Forget the grill, I’m surprised his parents own this whole place, it’s like a freaking resort! Actually, no I’m not, they already live in a mansion, this is probably nothing to them. But I didn’t expect them to let all of us stay here without adult supervision.”

“Sooyun, we are adults. Technically.” As a group of 18 year olds fresh out of high school, legally, you all could be considered adults. But you’re far from responsible. Jin’s parents must have a lot of faith in you all to let you stay here with a fully stocked refrigerator and bar— your parents would never let you do such a thing, even with supervision.

“Yeah, ‘adults’. You said your mom gave you a lecture this morning? What about?” Sooyun is a really great listener and you’ve confided in her multiple times throughout the period of time you’ve known her, so naturally she knows the most about your private life. Jimin is another great listener in the group— on the rare occasions when you can get him alone— but he has the tendency to say a lot of things he’s not supposed to when he gets drunk, so you kinda stopped sharing secrets with him. Plus, he’s already Taehyung’s secret holder, you wouldn’t want to overburden him.

You sigh. “She basically gave me a rundown of how to survive in the wilderness and what to do if we see a bear. I tried to tell her we’re not camping outside or anything, but of course she wouldn’t listen to me and kept talking anyway. Then she shoved a handful of condoms into my bag because she “couldn’t trust that a horny group of teenagers will be able to keep their hands to themselves”, so she gave them to me “just in case” and then proceeded to lecture me about getting pregnant and STDs.”

“Is that why there was a pile of condoms left on my floor? I thought someone was pulling a prank.” She mumbles, looking a little relieved, closing the lid of the grill to let the food cook properly. “But at least she cares, right?”

“Yeah I guess...” Your mother has never been good at the parenting thing. At times you felt as if she were too lenient, giving you more freedom than you needed and letting certain things go unpunished. You aren’t a bad child, you rarely do things that deserve punishment, but growing up you wished she were a little more involved in your life or at least showed that she gave a crap about what you did, and now that you’re going away to college she’s finally stepping in to be the parent that you needed a long time ago. “I think she realized how much time she wasted not acting like a parent and now she’s trying to make up for it. But it’s too late, I grew up already and she missed it. I appreciate her effort, but at this point it’s just annoying and unwanted.” She nods, taking in your words silently. “She did say something that I agreed with, though. Stay away from Kim Taehyung.”

Both of you look toward the glass patio door where you can hear Taehyung and Jimin either laughing or arguing over at the bar, most likely trying to decide how drunk they want to get tonight. Tae is the loudest, shouting something about vodka and sexy bartenders and the two of you just shake your heads. The only times Tae actually drinks are when he’s with Jimin or there’s a threat of him being the only sober one. He told you once that he hates alcohol and how it tastes, yet you somehow find him drunk at almost every social gathering you’ve attended in your high school career. And drunk Tae is not something you want to deal with, ever, especially since you’ll be sharing a room with him tonight.

“What’s your problem with him? Don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t get why you have such a vendetta against him when he’s literally done nothing wrong.” Leave it to her to always speak her mind. It’s something you’ve always admired her for and that’s probably why you get along so well.

“He’s an idiot and I don’t understand him. I feel like he doesn’t think about the words that come out of his mouth 97% of the time and that irritates the hell out of me.”

“Yeah, but neither does Jimin. They’re stupid as a pair, it’s not just Taehyungie, but you like Jimin just fine.” She does have a point there. Jimin isn’t the bad influence that causes Tae to do stupid things— he’s capable of that all on his own— but for some reason when they’re together, Tae just gets exponentially worse. You have a theory that the two of them actually share one collective brain cell, except Jimin holds it most of the time and Tae only uses it when he needs to swindle someone into getting something he’s not supposed to have.

“I don’t have a problem with Jimin, he’s had a tough life and I know most of the time his behavior is just a coping mechanism for the shit he’s going through. I actually think he’s really strong and has a great personality, and if he wasn’t gay I probably would have jumped his bones by now.” It’s no secret that you are attracted to Jimin. I mean, have you seen him? When you first met, you couldn’t stop blushing and drooling over him, despite his questionable behavior and moods at times, and when you learned of his background as a boy whose only home has been an orphanage and the other children that live in it, you completely fell for him. You swear you were obsessed with him for at least a month after your first introduction, you were even nicer to Taehyung to get closer to him. But then one day you heard him talking about his crush on a boy in one of his classes and your hopes were shattered. He claims he’s bi, but you have yet to witness him actually having a crush on a girl. Either way, you quickly discovered that he certainly does not have feelings for you. “Taehyung, on the other hand, doesn’t have an excuse for the shit he does. And it doesn’t help that he’s always purposely doing things to pick on me.”

“Maybe he does have a reason.”

“I doubt it. He’s just an asshole.” You conclude there at the sound of the door opening, Jungkook walking out to rearrange the seats to face the screening wall. Sooyun tenses when he enters, but plays it off quickly. Not before you notice, however.

“He’s not the worst of them, though. We’ve met some pretty horrible guys.” She jokes, trying to speak a little quieter now that Jungkook is within earshot.

“Maybe we’ll have better luck with guys in college. Maybe I’ll like someone who is actually into girls and maybe you’ll find someone who isn’t-“ your best friend. Not that it’s a bad thing. You stop yourself from saying it out loud, remembering how you weren’t going to say anything about the two of them unless she decided to bring it up. She doesn’t seem to notice your slip up. “I heard that most people meet their soulmate in college.”

“Please, I’d be lucky if I find 1 guy that’s interested in me. I have terrible luck with men.” Jungkook looks up from behind her, quickly looking away once he catches your gaze. Yup, something definitely went down between the two of them. You haven’t figured out if it was a good or bad thing yet.

“You’re a smart girl with an amazing smile, I’m sure there will be men falling over you once you get there in the fall.” There’s still uncertainty in her eyes and she avoids yours by opening the hood of the grill again and checking on the food. It looks mostly done so you grab a plate and wait for her to pile them on. You keep looking back at Jungkook over her shoulder, he seems distracted and that’s probably because he’s been listening in on your conversation. The idea of Sooyun going away to college and meeting other people seems to bother him and you wish she would just turn around and see that. But she doesn’t.

“Sure, I might be pretty for high school standards, but I doubt I’ll look all that special to anyone in my first year. I’ll have to wait for my ‘glow up’ before anyone even looks at me.”

“Shut up, you’re beautiful.” Before you can even open your mouth to reassure her, Jungkook’s voice sounds from behind. He says it so confidently, like it’s the only thing he’s certain of in his life, and when you both turn to look at him, he meets her eyes as if to say that what he’s just spoken is the truth. And then his eyes return back to his work.

Sooyun looks frozen in place, no longer looking at him but staring off into space, her hand still holding firmly onto the poker she was using to remove the food. “Hello?” You wave a hand over her face, concerned by how it looks like she’s having war flashbacks behind her eyes, teeth biting down hard on her bottom lip and chest heaving. What on earth was she thinking about? “Sooyun, are you in there? The food is burning!”

“Huh?” This seems to snap her out of it and she blinks rapidly a few times before turning back to the grill and cursing at the sight of burning food. You want to ask her about it, but telling from the mortified look on her face, she probably doesn’t want to talk.

A few minutes later, everyone is settled in a seat, snacks distributed along the coffee table for convenience within everyone’s reach. You reach for a bag of snacks, after the first 10 minutes of the movie after eyeing them since they got there, and since nobody claimed them yet, you decided it was yours for the taking. You lean forward slowly, as not to cause too much of a distraction, but just before your fingers reach the wrapper, a longer pair close around it and pull them out of reach. You lock eyes with none other than Kim Taehyung, who seems to freeze when he realizes his mistake, but he doesn’t offer them to you like any of your other friends would. Instead, he slowly begins to open the bag while making eye contact with you through the darkness.

“Don’t you dare.” You mouth at him, watching as he reaches his fingers into the bag and pulls out a large handful of the treats, shoving them into his mouth and crunching loudly. “You bastard, those were mine!” You try to whisper your rage as quietly as possible, but everyone hears you anyway.

He holds the bag up to his face, inspecting it from all angles before looking at you with an innocent look on his face. “I don’t see your name on it.”

“You saw me reaching for them.”

“You should have moved a little faster, I couldn’t tell what you were reaching for.”

“Not everyone has alien fingers like you.”

“Well, not everyone has baby hands like you.”

“Guys!” Namjoon interjects, cuddled up with Hoseok between you two. “Why can’t you just share?”

“I don’t think he knows what the word “share” means.” You narrow your eyes at Taehyung, who is still munching on your snacks.

“Why don’t you just take the bigger bag?” Someone suggests, directing your attention to the large family sized bag of the same snack in the middle of the table. If you open that bag, you’ll eat until it’s empty and you’ve gained 10 pounds. No thanks.

“I don’t want that one. It’s too big,”

“That’s what she said.” Tae snickers, pleased by the flames that flare up behind your eyes. “Fine, I’ll give it back.” After sinking his hands into the small bag for 2 more enormous handfuls, he tosses it back to you across the table and watches with a mischievous glow as you pick it up and peek inside.

“It’s empty.” As expected. You’re seething, though, speaking through your teeth as you try to get your rage under control. You sit the bag down gently, reaching for a bag of candy instead, and out of the corner of your eye you see him lean forward too, but this time there’s a deadliness in your gaze that makes him retreat with a boxy, almost sheepish grin.

Your attitude continues throughout most of the movie, angrily stuffing gummies into your mouth as you try to get over how petty Taehyung is. He’s so childish, taking a snack that you were clearly going for and eating it in front of you, adding insult to injury by handing you an empty bag. How old is he anyway: 6? He’s so frustrating sometimes, you just want to go over there and slap some sense into him.

“Are you still pouting over those snacks?” Hobi asks once he looks over and sees your bent up expression. “It’s not that big of a deal.” He laughs.

He’s right, it’s not that much of a problem. You’re just making it into one. Upon closer reflection, you realize how childish you must look to all of your other friends. Sure, Tae purposely tried to get on your nerves and it worked, but it always works. You always argue and throw a fit when things don’t go your way, and the more you watch the movie, the more clearly you see that. A character in the film started off as the annoying girl who complained about everything and thought the world was out to get her, when really, it was just her outlook on things and reactions to minor inconveniences that made situations worse. Everyone could see it, it was painfully obvious, and you begin to see a similarity to her in yourself. Did you act like this with Taehyung? Were you the petty one who exploded over the smallest inconveniences or discomfort around him? Yes, he can be an asshole sometimes, but there is a more adult way to deal with him. You were just talking to Sooyun about being adults, yet here you are, pouting over a bag of snacks that you could literally get in a bigger size across the table all because you wanted that specific one and now you’re upset because somebody else took it. When you look at it from an outside point of view, you’re the one that looks silly here. This is the type of argument you would have to settle if you were babysitting a group of elementary schoolers— not one involving almost college students. And thinking back to previous arguments you’ve had with him over the years, it’s always been like that. That’s not to say that Tae wasn’t also in the wrong, but maybe you could handle his immaturity in a different way other than bringing out your own.

You feel like your underlying issues stem from the lack of reinforcement and consequences you received for your behavior as a child when you would act out around other children, and it is your parents’ fault for not teaching you the appropriate way to deal with things like this, but that’s too deep of an introspection for you at this point in the story. And you can’t be your own therapist. Self reflection and awareness doesn’t happen all at once, people. That shit takes time.

The rest of movie night is surprisingly enjoyable. The movie you all agreed on is corny and definitely not your usual genre, but you enjoy it no less and find yourself fully engaged by the end of it. A cool breeze blows by and you burrow into a blanket, shifting to be comfortable during the last few scenes of the movie. When it ends, you’re the first one to offer to clean up, not even realizing that Yoongi had already started. It’s pretty late, almost midnight actually, so as soon as everything is back in it’s rightful place, everyone heads up to their rooms for the first night at the lake house.

Your rooms each hold one (1) unreasonably comfortable King sized bed, in which you were expected to share with your roommate. Great. Taehyung skips out on clean up a little early and you walk into the room to find him sprawled out in nothing but loose shorts and a t-shirt. It’s clear he’s going commando, you can see the outline of his dick all the way from where you stand on the other side of the room— not that you were looking. If you took the time to really look at him, he’s actually pretty hot. His pretty, brown, slightly wavy hair swoops down to cover his intense eyebrows, partially concealing his expression as he stares down at the phone in his large hands. The profile of his face is gorgeous, beautifully shaped nose, pillowy lips, and a sharp jawline his defining features, even his eye shape is endearing. Objectively, some people would say he’s very attractive, you’ve heard many girls refer to him as the most handsome man they’ve ever seen, but you don’t think you’d go as far as saying such bold statements. Not when his personality overshadows his looks.

“Why are you taking up most of the bed already?” You huff, walking over to your luggage to gather your pajamas. “Do I have to fight you for bed space too?”

“No, I’ll respect your half of the bed.” He gives in easily, scooting over a bit to demonstrate his honesty. You look up at him.

“You better, I can get pretty aggressive at night in bed.”

“Mm, kinky.” He winks, not missing the opportunity to be inappropriate.

“That’s not how I meant it.” You’re flustered slightly for some reason, hating how he always knows just what to say to get a reaction out of you. Then you pause and take a look at yourself. A mature person would just brush him off and mind their business instead of encouraging him. So that’s what you try to do. “Whatever, I’m going to go take a shower.”

Without another word, you strut into the bathroom, ready to wash away this day. While under the warm stream of water, you think about the day and how you acted. Nothing bad happened to you. The only thing is that you were paired with an idiot, and from what you gathered, it was because everyone wanted you to talk out your problems and actually get along for once. But you dragged that one little “issue” with you all day and it prevented you from enjoying yourself to the fullest on your first day of this short vacation. You wouldn’t have done anything differently if you weren’t as upset, you’re still pretty reserved, but your negative mood certainly put a damper on things. And Taehyung really didn’t do anything wrong either. Maybe you’ve been treating him harshly for no reason. He acts the same around everyone, you’re the only one who takes it personally. Maybe you owe him an apology.

“Hey,” You start softly, stepping out of the steamy bathroom fully clothed and ready for bed. “Are you okay with me not wearing a bra? I don’t want you to be uncomfortable or anything.” You weren’t really asking him because even if he said “no” you still wouldn’t sleep with a bra on, but you just wanted to be courteous. He seems surprised by your sudden consideration of his comfort level.

“Oh. Um, y-yeah that’s fine.” His brows shoot up behind his bangs when he looks at you, clearly struggling to keep his eyes on your face. You sport a loose t-shirt and a small pair of shorts, short enough to hide under the hem of your shirt and show off the curve of your ass. You weren’t expecting to room with him, or any of the other guys for that matter, so you weren’t very mindful when packing your sleepwear.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” You hide a smirk behind an inquisitive purse of your lips.

“Yes, what you wear does not matter to me.” He stresses with a straight face, but you see through it.

“Yeah? Cuz your thin shorts say otherwise.” His hands immediately shoot to his crotch, hiding the snake in his pants that only seems to grow the longer you’re in front of him. You would find it flattering if you didn’t find him completely repulsive.

“I think you know by now that it doesn’t take much for me to get hard. It’ll go away in a minute.” He doesn’t look the slightest bit embarrassed when you climb into bed beside him, using the mountains of pillows provided to build a fort down the center of the bed to clarify your individual sides. “Wow, you have zero trust in me.” He laughs. But his laugh dies down you you look up at him seriously, probably anticipating you to throw a snarky, kinda offensive comment his way.

“I owe you an apology.”

“...For what?” He looks very confused and startled, not at all expecting those words to come out of your mouth.

“For being such a bitch to you. Not just today, but basically every day since we met.” You feel like you should go on, but you don’t know what else to say. “You’re a prick but you’re not as terrible as I make you out to be.”

“Thanks, I guess.” Taehyung doesn’t seem convinced, waiting for you to do or say something mean, but your words end there. “Is that it?”

“Yes, that’s it. Were you expecting me to write a whole essay on how badly I treat and misjudge you?” He’s taken aback, but not shocked by the edge in your voice. “Zoe said she wants me to try to get along with you, so I’m trying. Earlier you asked me for a truce over the weekend and I didn’t say anything. Well, this is me formally telling you that I accept; I will attempt to tolerate you and hold my tongue as much as I can for the sake of the others.”

“How do I know you’re being serious right now?”

“I wouldn’t say it if I wasn’t serious. I don’t talk out of my ass like you tend to do; if I said it, I meant it.” You reel yourself back in when you hear how harsh you sound. “Sorry.” Did you always sound like this when you spoke to him? It’s like you’re a completely different person.

“Hmm,” He considers, eyeing you up and down. “Yeah, okay. But in order for this to work, you actually have to be nice to me for once. Do you think you’re capable of that?”

Biting your tongue, you force yourself not to roll your eyes. “I said I’ll try.”

“Good enough!” The boxy smile that crosses his lips is absolutely adorable, but you push that thought aside as soon as it enters your mind to avoid cooing at him. “Well, if you’re trying to be nicer, I guess I’ll try not to tease you so much. Usually I just do it because it’s fun, but sometimes I do feel bad about irritating you so much. You’re just so easy to pick on.”

“You have a conscience? Who would’ve thought.” You giggle, pushing pastel hair out of your eyes, and he stares at you wide eyed until you stop laughing. “I get it, I’m not funny.”

“No, no, it’s not that.” He quickly says, raising a hand defensively. “I’ve just never seen you giggle... at me before.”

“Because you’re not funny.”

“Others would beg to differ.”

“Like who?”

“Jimin. Jungkook. Jin.” He lists off a few others from school, names that you’d rather forget, and you stop him after a short while.

“Okay, I get it. But they don’t count, they’ll laugh at anything.” You lean against one of the pillows between you two, elbow supporting your weight as you move a little closer to him. His phone is forgotten now, cast aside now that your full attention is on him.

“Do you remember that one time me and Jin did that comedy skit in the talent show last year?” He’s already laughing at the memory, the melodious sound bringing a smile to your face when you think back to that cringeworthy performance. “Everyone thought we were funny then.”

“Yeah, because you’re both wannabe actors and failed comedians.”

“I wouldn’t say we failed. Doesn’t matter how terrible we were— got everyone to laugh didn’t we?” He has a point, one that you can only shake your head to in disbelief. This is weird— having a conversation with him that doesn’t involve yelling, arguing, or personal insults. You could even say that you sound like friends reminiscing about the past. The conversation continues on like this, bringing up the few good memories you’ve made that involve him, which, as it turns out, aren’t as few as you thought, and you begin to realize that you don’t hate him. It feels like you’re getting to know each other for the first time, you’re learning things about him that you hadn’t picked up even in the 4 years of knowing him. But he seems to know a lot about you. Now you truly feel like a terrible friend.

“It’s getting late.” You say with a yawn, checking your phone lazily from its spot on the charger. You’ve been talking to him for over an hour already.

“Yeah, we should probably go to sleep.” Tae says, voice even deeper than normal. The bass sends chills up your spine and you tell yourself it’s because you can feel the vibrations through the air and mattress. “Wait, I have something to give you.”

“What is it?” You look at him skeptically as he hops off the bed and rummages through his bag. You can’t imagine what it would be, but there’s a pit of anxiety in your stomach. It could be anything.

“These. I felt bad about earlier.” He sheepishly scratches the back of his neck as he returns to his side of the bed after handing you the snack you wanted during the movie. It’s a small bag, one meant for a single person and not a whole house of people like the one left out on the coffee table for the group, and you take it gingerly, almost too shy to thank him. The fact that he thought of you enough to get another bag for you blew your mind, especially since he didn’t know that you were going to apologize to him tonight. You could have kept acting like a complete asshole to him and he probably would have still felt bad and gave them to you. You most likely wouldn’t have done the same for him if the roles were switched. God, how shallow are you? Maybe there’s a reason people actually choose to be his friend.

“You didn’t have to.” You place them on the bedside table next to you, for a later time, and he acknowledges this.

“Yeah, but that was a dick move on my part and I wanted to make up for it. If you don’t want them, I’ll gladly eat them in front of you again.” His signature grin plasters itself to his face once more and you feel a little more comfortable now that he isn’t being genuine anymore. That’s uncharted territory between the two of you and you’re still a bit rocky with the friendly exchanges. But you’ll get there. For now, though, you roll your eyes at him and turn out the light, sinking into the cozy mattress and high thread count sheets.

Waking up next to Taehyung wasn’t as bad as you thought it would be. The sun is barely up, not yet above the trees but high enough to brighten the sky, and the wide-set windows let in as much light as possible. It wakes you and brings your attention to the glowing man next to you, all messy hair and wrapped around most of your pillow fort, but you aren’t filled with resentment at the sight of him. You find it kind of cute actually. You’ve never seen him asleep before— he looks so peaceful— and you don’t want to disturb that peace, so you crawl out of bed slowly and silently, pull on some real clothes and make your way out of the house.

The lake is absolutely stunning. The water reflects every ray of light present to give off a shimmering, glittery effect that nothing else could replicate. You sit at the edge of the water on a lawn chair you pulled over from the patio, back facing the lake house as you look off into the distance, recreating the image of the landscape across from you in your notebook with a steady hand. You wish you had brought your paints with you and an easel, the colors that seep into the sky over the trees is absolutely indescribable and you want nothing more than to capture it with your own hands on paper. You don’t even have your colored pencils, so you are left with a black and white rendition of the scene, your imagination, and a reference picture for later.

The nature is perfect for your creative mind, you’ve never felt more inspired in your life. When you first woke up, you tried your hardest to fall asleep, but after one glance out of the window, your mind started buzzing with inspiration to make art and you could no longer rest, that’s how you ended up out here, fighting tiredness to be present in the moment and capture it forever. Being out here alone doesn’t feel dangerous, Yoongi was awake and in the kitchen when you were leaving and you told him where you would be in case anything happened. You wanted to ask if he slept well or if he even needed to sleep at all, but you weren’t sure how he would react to your questioning and it seemed rude so you kept your mouth shut. Out here in the partial darkness, you feel totally comfortable and at peace. It’s silent aside from the leaves and wildlife shifting around you, birds chirping their morning song, and it’s such a nice soundtrack that you don’t even need the music in your headphones to focus on your art.

On the other hand, though, now you are alone with your thoughts and the guilt that’s been building ever since your self revelation last night. Talking to Taehyung really made you realize something: that you are probably the most stubborn person you’ve ever met. You’ve carried your first impression of him throughout your entire friendship— if you can even call it that— and no matter how much he’s shown you that he isn’t the person you made him out to be, you refused to believe it and give him a chance. You told Sooyun that the reason you didn’t like Tae was because you didn’t understand him, but now you see that it was because you never attempted to understand him in the first place. You gave Jimin a chance, after hearing about his hardships, but you weren’t willing to do the same for Taehyung. You knew nothing about him. And you ignored every good thing he’s ever done and instead highlighted all of his stupid decisions that any other teenage boy would make.

Sitting here alone, you decide this is the perfect time to continue your introspection and self evaluation. Most things that you’ve experienced negatively are a consequence of your own actions. Taehyung is always a boisterous, playful soul, even when you aren’t around, and you used to think that the reason why you didn’t get along was because your personalities were incompatible. But you’re starting to notice that it was your own attitude toward him that made you think that way. You saw him in your first year in high school goofing off during P.E. and assumed that he was always like this, which is not entirely untrue. Then he made one somewhat offensive comment and that set the tone for how you would see him up until this point.

“Why do you always stand off to the side and just watch? I think the game would be much more fun if you actually participated in it.” He said this with a goofy smile directed at you, who was placed firmly at the sidelines and quite content with your lack of involvement. In hindsight, he wasn’t even trying to be mean, it was an honest observation, but you took it the wrong way. He was probably trying to nicely convince you to join the action, yet your previous assumptions about him caused you to take offense to everything that came out of his mouth, and your spectators didn’t make it any better.

Everyone around you chuckled at his little comment, adding in their own judgements of you, like how you’re just the weird girl who likes to draw people or how you rarely even spoke so he shouldn’t expect you to willingly physically play with others, and those comments hurt. Not that you cared about what anyone thought of you anyway, that’s why you continue to be the way you are, but the fact that all eyes were on you, that everyone noticed you and thought negatively of your character, was like a stab in the heart. You had never done anything wrong to any of them, yet that’s how they felt about you.

“Yeah? Well at least I’m not a ball hog. Maybe you should let other players have a chance to score, you’re not even that good. And I’m seeing that off the bench.” Your sassy remark earns a collective “ooooh” from the teens who have since stopped the game. Taehyung didn’t seem fazed though.

“Says the person who has yet to step foot on the court. Maybe we would be able to score more points if all of the players on our team were actually present.” You flip him off and the gym teacher sees, breaking the two of you up before you cause any more of a disturbance than you already have. Up until this point, the people in your class hadn’t even heard you speak before, but this one altercation earned you a reputation of being the weird art kid with a bad attitude, and people steered clear of you. And you blamed it all on Tae, even if it was buried in your subconscious mind. 

What you didn’t know was that behind the scenes he defended you when others would talk behind your back. He always invited you to play or picked you to be on his team and you just assumed it was because he wanted you nearby so he could pick on you, but it never once crossed your mind that he actually wanted to befriend you. Even when you did become friends, you always thought he had the worst intentions in mind whenever he interacted with you. In reality, you’re always the one that starts arguments, he’s just returning your energy. His own actions, however, show a different side of him that you forced yourself to ignore. Taehyung always made sure that you weren’t being left out and that you were comfortable, even when you cursed at him and told him to go away or leave you alone. It was always him that looked out for you.

“You’re up early.” A deep voice sounds behind you among the rustling summer leaves and you turn to face a sleepy looking Taehyung, who drags another lawn chair behind him as he walks. His hair is messy and there are bags under his eyes, but the light hits him in a way that makes him look almost angelic. You shake that thought away almost immediately.

“So are you.”

“The sun woke me up. And then I realized you weren’t in bed anymore, so I got up and went looking for you. Yoongi told me you were out here.” He sits a respectable distance away from you, far enough where you won’t complain, and he gazes out at the scenery you’re more than halfway done sketching. You sit in silence for a while, surprised that he even has the capability to be quiet for longer than a minute, and you watch the sun rise together. “What are you doing out here so early?”

“Drawing.” You lift your notebook up slightly and he acknowledges with a nod, although it was pretty obvious. “And thinking.”

“You’re drawing the sunrise? But you only have a pencil.” He points out, leaning over the side of his chair to see your artwork better. You shift it away from his line of sight out of habit, but correct yourself quickly.

“I’ll draw the shadows and outlines here and color it once I get back home.” By the short answers you give him, he can tell you’re not in a talking mood, but he’s never deterred by something like that so he keeps questioning.

“Hm. What were you thinking about? You seem rather... pensive.”

“Do you even know what that word means?” You snort, looking at him for the first time since he sat down.

“In fact, I do. I heard it in a movie once and used context clues to figure it out.” He seems proud of himself so you humor him. “So, what’s on your mind?”

“I was thinking about you.” Your eyes meet for a moment before you turn away, but it’s enough to see the shock on his face.

“Me?”

“Well, kinda. I realized something last night— that I’m a judgy, stuck-up bitch when it comes to you and I severely underestimated your character.” Running a hand through your pastel hair, you sigh, looking over the water. “I created this entirely different image of you in my head based on a few first impressions, and I was too stubborn to change that image after we became friends. I always treated you like you were some inconsiderate fool that did whatever, whenever, and didn’t give a damn about anyone else-“

“Gee, thanks.”

“-But now I realize that I had absolutely no evidence that you were that type of person and that I just pretended you were an like that to justify being rude to you. Which makes me the monster.” Bringing your eyes back down to your paper, you try to distract yourself by finishing your piece, but you feel lost. “It’s gotten to the point where I don’t even know how to talk to you anymore without being mean.”

“You’re not a monster.” Taehyung’s voice is gentle now, though still deeper than usual, and it sends shivers up your spine. “I totally get that you don’t really like me, not everyone does. It’s my fault for always bothering you,”

“No, you’re not supposed to be the one apologizing. You’re playful and you make an effort to have fun with me like you do with everyone else, I’m the one that always took it too seriously.”

“Faye, it’s fine. Really. You don’t have to explain yourself to me.”

“Yes, I do, Tae. I’m sorry for being a horrible friend.”

“You really don’t need to apologize.”

“Okay, but I’m still sorry that I treated you like that.”

“It doesn’t matter, stop apologizing.”

“It does matter, I’m a terrible person.”

“You’re not! You are literally one of the nicest people I have met.”

“Except for the fact that I’m terrible to you.”

“You meant well.”

“I really didn’t. I actually hated you for the longest time. I’m so sorry.”

“Stop saying you’re sorry!”

“I’m sorry!”

“Stop!”

“No! Just let me feel bad about myself for once and accept that I’m the bad guy!” Both of you are silent for a minute, frowning at each other. “See, I can’t even apologize properly without arguing with you.” You bring a palm to your face tiredly, frustrated with yourself.

“I’ll accept your apology if that’s what you need to hear. But I honestly don’t think you did anything wrong. Sure, we might bicker like a married couple, but we’re still close, and that’s what I value the most.” He resolves and you both stare back out into the calm water until you speak up again.

“...Did you just compare us to a married couple?” In the brightening daylight, you can see the faint traces of a blush crawl onto his cheeks, his eyes widening slightly paired with a boxy smile.

“You know what I mean. I didn’t want to say we are like preschoolers because I thought that was a little offensive.”

“I’m more offended by the married couple analogy and its implications. I’d rather be a toddler.” You joke. Something weird crosses Taehyung’s face for a split second, but before you can address it, it’s gone.

“So are we good now?” He asks, sighing in his seat. You close your notebook, making a move to stand and turn to the lake house.

“I don’t know. That’s up to you.” He looks up at you before standing as well, folding his chair.

“Yeah, I think we’re okay- as long as you don’t try to apologize again.” He’s grinning now, looking a little more awake than before, and you try not to stare into his glowing eyes. What has gotten into you? You nod in agreement.

“Let’s head inside, it looks like some of the others are up for breakfast.” A large window leading into the dining room is in full view from your spot by the lake and you can clearly see Zoe, Jin, and Hobi sitting around the table. You assume Jimin, Jungkook, and Namjoon are still asleep, where you currently long to be, and make a decision as you walk back up to the house. Food or sleep? You choose the latter and head back up to your room to catch a few more winks of sleep, requesting to Yoongi that he save you a plate. Taehyung takes a seat at the table.

“Morning.” He greets, resting his head on the table once Yoongi informs him that breakfast is almost ready.

“Spending some extra time with your girl, Tae? Was last night not enough?” Hoseok nudges him in the side, grinning hard at his own teasing.

“You and Faye are dating?” Yoongi comes into the room with hot plates filled with delicious food, setting them down in front of everyone.

“No. We were just talking like normal human beings. Nothing happened last night and she is not my girl.” He clarifies sternly, fearful that you might be able to hear the conversation and will come running for his throat if he even implied something like that.

“You and Faye, talking, not screaming at each other? That’s new.” Jin comments, already digging into his food. He calls Yoongi to join them at the table, patting the empty seat on the other side of him.

“Yeah, last night it looked like she was about to rip his head off.” Hobi laughs, shoveling food into his mouth like he hasn’t eaten in years.

“See, I told you being roommates would help you work out your differences.” Zoe seems proud, smiling at Taehyung like a mother would after she has just been proven right.

“First of all, that was my idea.” Jin pouts, but she just keeps eating. The smell of food must have pulled Jimin out of his slumber and lured him to the dining room because a moment later he stumbles in, eyes still half closed and face still puffy with sleep. He doesn’t even greet anyone, just sits and asks where the food is. Yoongi brings him his plate before anyone can even answer and Jimin stares a little longer than normal as the android gracefully makes his way back over to his spot across the table.

“Are you the chef or something?” He asks, confused, but nobody pays attention to him.

“So, what did you guys talk about?” Zoe pries at Taehyung, interested in how you’ve bonded.

“Wait, what’s going on?” Jimin turns to his best friend, eyeing the tired, yet happy look on his face.

“Faye and I talked last night and this morning.” He smiles.

“Talked? Not argued?”

“That’s what I said!” Jin exclaims, though he quiets down to let Tae speak.

“I think we really got a lot closer.” He explains how you apologized out of the blue last night and actually held a real conversation with him, and also how you opened up about why you always were mean to him this morning. The whole time he spoke, everyone paid close attention, astonished by how much progress the two of you made in less than 12 hours.

“Wow, I’m so proud of you guys.” Hobi claps. “When I didn’t hear you arguing last night, I assumed she either killed you, or you were fucking.”

“Fucking? She would never.” Tae refutes immediately.

“But you would?” Jimin questions with a raise of his eyebrow, catching his friend off guard.

“W-What?”

“The sexual tension is there. All that anger and frustration must make for some amazing sex.” Jimin leans back in his chair, cheeks full and glowing.

“Angry sex is the best, right Jin and Zoe? Oh right, you two wouldn’t know.” Hoseok teases cruelly, both of their faces burning bright red. Just then, Namjoon and Sooyun walk down, Sooyun glancing quickly around the table before sighing in relief at a certain boy’s absence. “Right babe?”

“Huh?” Namjoon takes a seat next to his boyfriend, waiting to be filled in.

“Angry sex is the best, right?”

“Absolutely.” Namjoon winks, his dimples coming out when the others just shake their heads.

“You should try it sometime, Tae. Might clear up some of those unresolved issues between the two of you.” Jimin points his chopsticks at him and Tae looks away in embarrassment. “You can’t tell me you’ve never thought about it before.”

“Can we just- not talk about this right now.” For the first time, your group of friends see a bashful side of the infamously carefree Taehyung. Sooyun and Namjoon want to ask what’s going on, but Tae pleads to end the conversation there, so the topic changes to something else and the day moves forward.

The sun scorches down on you as you sit by the lakeside in your bikini, applying sunscreen to protect from what seems like an inevitable sunburn. The boys are already in the water, jumping from the dock into the surprisingly clean lake— one of the wonders of privately own property. Sooyun can’t swim and you don’t really feel like getting in the water just yet, so the two of you chill where it’s dry and have a little chat. You catch her up on what’s been going on between you and Tae, she was still curious from breakfast, and she applauds your maturity.

“Wow, it seems like you really had a self-growth moment. Does this mean that you and Tae are cool now?”

“I guess? It still feels weird though. I spent so much time ignoring him, you know, and now it’s hard to change my view on him so suddenly.” You’re used to listening to other people’s drama and not saying or doing much, always the spectator, but now that something is actually going on in your life, it’s a bit awkward being the center of attention.

“He seemed really happy about your bonding time this morning, I think it was really unexpected for him when you opened up like that. Usually you only really open up to me.”

“He was talking about it at breakfast?” For some reason you’re irritated by this, or embarrassed, you can’t really tell the difference anymore.

“Yeah,” She laughs when you glare at him in the water. “He didn’t say anything bad though, don’t worry. Looks like he’s been waiting for a chance to prove himself to you for a very long time.” Your eyebrows scrunch up as you think about what she could mean by that. Was he really trying that hard to be your friend and you were the only one who misinterpreted his actions? It seems like it.

“I need your opinion on something.” You start a little quieter, making sure that no one will overhear. “Why do you think he picks on me so much? I know that’s how he usually is, but he does it so much more when I’m around.” You know she’ll give you a straight answer, she never minces her words.

“I believe he originally started doing it because that’s the only way he could get you to pay any attention to him and he wanted you to notice him. If he isn’t saying or doing anything dumb, you pretend like he’s not even there. He probably just wanted to catch your eye and then build from there but you never let him, and then he eventually got used to playing that role with you.”

“Okay, so why do you think it bothers me so much?” It sounds stupid to ask someone else about how you feel about something or why you feel a certain way, but you honestly don’t know what to make of the situation.

“Simple. I think when you first met, you saw him and expected him to be someone you could befriend and trust, but he hurt your feelings one time so you just went full defensive and decided to hate everything that comes out of his pretty little mouth. I’ve seen you do it before, Faye. Remember that kid in history? The one we did the project with?”

“Ugh, her.”

“You thought she was going to be the nicest person, but when we started working with her, you realized she was-“

“A bossy, know-it-all, who had a stick up her ass 24/7 and put in minimal effort to the group project. And then had the nerve to take all the credit for it.”

“Right. Well, she didn’t live up to your expectations and now you hate her, it’s as easy as that. That’s kind of a thing you do.”

You grimace, hearing this for the first time. She’s right, you do have a history of shunning people because they weren’t as great as you expected them to be, and Taehyung is a primary case of that. “Damn, I really am terrible.” You mumble with a frown.

“No, I think that’s actually a good defense mechanism because you’re obviously better at avoiding people that might hurt you in the future. But Taehyung is good, he didn’t do anything wrong, you should take a chance on him. I can tell he means a lot to you, only people you care about have the ability to get to you like this.”

She really does know you better than you know yourself. “You’re so wise.”

She takes a sip of her cold drink, eyes following your other friends as they splash around in the water. Yoongi stands with his feet in the water, something you weren’t aware that he could do, and he seems to enjoy watching the antics of the others. Taehyung is smiling wildly as Jimin splashes him and attempts to show off his swimming skills. You catch sight of Jungkook who stands at the top of a small hill where a rope is connected to a tree over the water. He waits until Sooyun is looking before he jumps, making Tarzan noises as he swings gracefully in the air, making his landing with a big splash in the water. She giggles beside you silently, straightening her face again when he resurfaces.

“What was going on with you last night during the movie?” You bring up, suddenly reminded of her odd behavior the night before.

“What do you mean?”

“You seemed really jumpy and zoned out, like, the entire time, then you suddenly got up and went to the kitchen with Jungkook and never came back.”

“Correction, he followed me into the kitchen, we did not go ‘together’.” You roll your eyes at her.

“Whatever. I just wanna know if anything went down while you were in there. Jungkook seemed pretty flustered when he came back out.” Imitating one of Taehyung’s signature moves, you wiggle your eyebrows suggestively, laughing when she pushes your shoulder.

“Stop it! Nothing happened, we just talked a little and then I went to bed after Taehyung came in.”

“Ah, the original cock blocker.” You shake your head, not even surprised that his air-headed ass barged in and ruined a possible moment. “Are you going to tell me why you’re being so awkward with him?”

“I’m n-“

“OH! Can I guess what happened?” You seem excited so she entertains you.

“I will neither confirm nor deny anything you say.”

“I don’t care, I just think it’s fun to guess.” She sighs and you move on. “Hmm, let’s see. He forgot your birthday and now you hate him?” No... “He walked in on you naked?” No reaction. “You got drunk and played a game of strip poker and accidentally gave him a boner?”

“Oddly specific...”

“Hey, you never know,” You shrug. “It definitely has to be something sexual though, I don’t think anything else would make you this awkward around each other.” Her face remains blank. “You kissed?” Nothing. “Did you guys fuck or something?” The tiniest muscle in her bottom eyelid twitches and you’re sharp enough to detect it, gasping loudly in shock. “That’s it, isn’t it?”

“I will neither confirm nor deny.” She repeats in a steady voice, but you can feel the heat coming off of her face from here.

“I know you better than that, you don’t have to say anything. Whatever it is, I won’t judge you, but I can see there’s something going on between you two. We don’t have to talk about it, I don’t mean to make you uncomfortable, I’ll just take satisfaction in the fact that I figured it out before anybody else.” The pleased smile on your face let’s her know that she can’t even try to convince you that you’re wrong. You’re smarter than that and she might end up digging a hole for herself if she says anything further, so she just sighs deeply and looks off into the water. Her and Jungkook would definitely make a cute couple.

“I think Taehyung is calling you.” She elbows your arm, pointing at said man emerging from the water, hair dripping and feet slapping the cool ground with every approaching step. He comes to stand right in front of you and you feel it’s a compromising position— with your face eye level with his dick and all— so you lift your foot and push him away with a gentle heel to the gut.

“You’re dripping on me.” You complain when he shakes his hair like a wet dog. “What do you want?”

“Come swim for a little while, the water is perfect.” You look over at Sooyun, who pretends like she’s not paying attention to your conversation, but you can see her eyes are alight with interest. “Don’t look at her, she can’t save you from this one.” He grins when your eyes snap back to him.

“I don’t want to get in the water today, I’m perfectly fine here in the shade.”

“If you don’t do something, I’m going to pick you up and throw you off the dock.”

“Only if you want to die tonight,” You threaten.

“Come on, please?” He whines, giving you his best aegyo. You wan to vomit. “You always sit on the side and watch, I really think you’ll have more fun if you actually participate.”

“This is giving me deja vu.” You groan under your breath as he continues to pout. “Let’s make a deal. I’ll get in the lake with you if you do the rope swing.” You point to where Namjoon and Jimin are now fooling around, pushing each other to get more momentum on the swing and make a bigger splash. Jimin’s light body carries him high, it seems like he’s flying before he comes crashing down over the water. Taehyung gulps. You know he’s afraid of heights, it’s one of the only things you can tease him about, so you know it’s very likely that he won’t go through with it and you get to stay dry.

“Okay, deal.” He says before he can talk himself out of it, holding out his hand for you to shake. Staring at him skeptically, you hesitate to take his hand, allowing him to pull you to your feet and head over to the hill. He holds your hand a second longer than necessary before letting go, but of course you notice.

“Yah, Taehyungie! Are you going on the swing?” Jimin calls out to him as you approach the hill, climbing up the slope until you stand at the top. If Taehyung goes through with it, you’ll jump in from here too.

“Y-Yeah.” Tae sounds uneasy as he stands near the edge, looking down at the water below. It isn’t too high up, but it’s enough to catch some height with a swing or two, and it probably looks like you’re hanging on a ledge of a massive cliff from Taehyung’s perspective.

“You don’t have to do it,” You remind, trying to hide your cocky smirk. “It’s okay if you’re too afraid.”

“No, I can do it!” He grabs onto the rope, but makes no move closer to the edge.

“You can do it! Yell out into the distance!” Jimin encourages, laughing at the worried look on his best friend’s face as he stares down at the lake. The others gather around to watch, yelling a mixture of encouragement and teasing at him.

“He’s shaking like a leaf.” Jungkook chuckles, sitting on the edge of the dock with his phone recording it all. You stand alone up there, feeling obliged to coach him through it, but at the same time not wanting to end up in the water if he succeeds.

“It’s not that bad, Tae, just swing and let go. You just watched Jimin do it.” Your hand comes up to pat his shoulder, stopping short of his skin in hesitation. Instead, you offer to give him a push.

“N-no, I can do it.” Quivering voice and all, he grips onto the rope tighter, taking one step closer to the ledge.

You all cheer for him, holding in your chuckles at the visible shaking in his knees as he bends down in preparation to jump. And then he leaves the hill with a baby hop that makes everyone snort in laughter. You watch with wide eyes as he makes it to the top of his swing and-

“ahhHHHH!” His terror rings clear in his voice, hands refusing to let go as he misses his opportunity and comes back toward you, dangling from the rope with his eyes closed. Everyone bursts into laughter, Jimin nearly drowning as he locks up in joy, holding onto the pier for support. Tae is still swinging and screaming, waiting until the rope is barely moving anymore before finally letting go and landing in a shallower part of the lake. All he hears is Hoseok’s cackling and clapping when he resurfaces, everyone on their knees with glee, including you. Your eyes are blurry with tears of laughter, an ache in your ab muscles forming as you gasp for breath. He’s embarrassed, but seeing you laugh so hard is worth it.

“That was so wimpy,” Hoseok re-enacts his screams, causing a resurgence of laughter.

“You refused to go on the rope swing too, I don’t think you’re in any position to make fun of him.” His boyfriend points out, splashing him with water.

“Yeah, but I’m not the one who’s trying to impress the girl I like.” He sticks out his tongue, earning a deadly look from Taehyung, who glances your way to make sure you hadn’t heard. Luckily, you’re just making it over to the shore and heard nothing.

“That was adorable.” You smile, feeling victorious that your plans had succeeded. “But you did lose the bet, so I’m not going swimming.”

Pouting, Tae whines his objection. “But I put in so much effort! I don’t get anything for that?”

“Alright. I’m willing to make a compromise because you did try,” You say after a second of thinking. “I won’t go swimming, but I guess I’ll get on a canoe with you, if you really want me to.” While you were getting changed in the bathroom earlier, you heard Taehyung talking about wanting to try out the canoes. He seemed so excited to get on one, you feel like you should at least grant him one wish.

Out on the water, things are more peaceful. It takes teamwork to paddle together on the small boat, steering your way around the sizable lake, and most of your journey is spent in silence. You sit in the front, back facing him and looking over at the beautiful view of everything around you. One of the reasons you agreed to do this is because you really wanted a different perspective of this place, of the lake house, to draw in your sketchbook. You want to be able to remember how pretty this place is, how close you all are right now, these times that you won’t ever get back. From the other side of the lake, you can see all of your friends having fun for probably one of the last times all together, enjoying the beautiful weather and making the most of it, and you start to feel sentimental again.

“You look pensive again, what’s up?” Taehyung’s baritone once again saves you from your thoughts, and you resume paddling slowly, refusing to look at him with your watery eyes.

“This is one of the last times that we’ll all be together as close friends like this. After this weekend, we’ll all be packing to leave for school, each in different places, and I don’t think I’m ready for this to end yet.” The sound of your paddles gliding smoothly through the water is soothing, and you allow it to calm you down a little, composing yourself enough not to sound choked up. “I can’t help but think of all the time I wasted, all the time I spent worrying about things that are basically irrelevant now, and that’s time that I can never get back.”

“You’re a pretty deep person, aren’t you?” Taehyung asks, still getting used to you talking about real things to him. It’s not unexpected, he’s just not used to being on the receiving side of your sentiments. You place your paddle beside you when you reach the middle of the lake, turning in your seat to finally face him.

“I am. I like to pretend that I’m not, but I’m starting to realize that it’s pointless. I need to learn how to be more genuine, like you.” He blinks at this, wondering where all of this is coming from. “And thank you for always forcing me to participate. I would have missed out on a lot of things if you weren’t the one to convince me to live a little more. So thanks.”

He pauses for a long time, internalizing it all. “What’s going on with you lately? This morning you wanted to apologize and now you’re thanking me? Why do I feel like there’s some type of ulterior motive behind all this?”

“I’m trying to make amends with you,” You just barely hide the harsh tone of your words. “All of this is long overdue and I wanted to get it off my chest before the end of this weekend. Do you have a problem with that?”

Tae laughs at your temper, shaking his head and looking off into the distance. “Nope, I’m sorry. Keep going.”

“No, you ruined it, it’s over now.” You huff. And just like that, your sentimental moment is cut short.

“Like I said, you didn’t do anything wrong to me, so stop apologizing and thanking me. We’re all just trying our best here, we’re in the same boat.” A goofy smirk crosses his face. “Or should I say, same canoe.”

“God, you’re worse than Jin.” You groan. A king of lightening the mood. “Uh oh, looks like Jin and Zoe are sneaking off.” The two head over to the boathouse hand in hand, looking around suspiciously for any witnesses. You notice immediately and point them out, to which Taehyung just chuckles.

“You don’t miss much, do you?”

“Some people are just incredibly easy to read.”

“Am I easy to read?” He asks, staring straight into your soul.

Apparently not, because I was wrong about you this entire time. You think, frowning at him. When you take too long to answer, he begins rocking the boat playfully while repeating his question over and over, causing you to grab onto the sides for balance. “Taehyung, stop it before we flip over! I said I didn’t want to get wet.” He stops abruptly.

“I can make you wet in a different way if you want.” His wink is what sends you, reflexively grabbing your paddle and pretending to hit him with it.

“You’re unbearable.” But you can’t stop giggling. Or blushing. Ew.

“OH MY GOD, NO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” You hear Jungkook’s screech echo throughout the entire lake, bringing your attention to him and Sooyun backing out of the boathouse with tomato red cheeks and disgusted looks on their faces. A few moments later, Jin and Zoe follow, equally embarrassed with their heads hanging low and scowls on their lips. With that image fresh in your mind, you quickly sketch it in your notebook, creating a less detailed drawing of the lake house in just a few minutes as you float idly. Timeless memories. Tae doesn’t say anything, watching your hand work diligently at the paper with amazing accuracy, and when you’re finished, you close the book and sit it back down, looking up at him.

“We should probably head back, it’s getting hot out here.” You grab your paddle again, prompting him to turn his body the other way and begin making your way back to the dock. The attention isn’t on you when you get back, nobody is there to ask what you were talking about or make any ridiculous comments to Tae, and you’re thankful for this. You’d much rather get the tea on Jin and Zoe.

The bonfire rages in front of you, the group wrapping up the night after dinner with drinks around the fire pit. With full stomachs, all of you just sit and talk for a while, sharing laughs and stories into the night. The scent of burning wood wafts through the air and is almost enough to overpower the smell of alcohol in the cup that is handed to you.

“You’ve never been drunk before?” Jimin is relaxed in his corner of the sofa, arms spread along the top behind your shoulders. This is probably one of the first times you’ve willingly sat next to Taehyung and Jimin, sandwiching yourself between the two men to get comfortable. Taehyung was following you, who was following Jimin, who was stalking Yoongi, so the four of you found yourselves lined up on the long couch built into the fire pit area, equipped with materials for s’mores and cup holders.

“I don’t drink at all, actually.” You correct, swirling around the liquid in your glass. It looks like regular fruit juice, and you would have been fooled if you hadn’t seen Jimin spike it with vodka. “I prefer to be in control of my actions most of the time.”

“You don’t have to drink if you’re uncomfortable.” Taking a seat with her own drink in hand, Zoe gently reassures you that there is no pressure to drink tonight— everyone is just trying to have fun. Regardless of what she says, however, you’ve already decided that you want this to be your first experience with alcohol, surrounded by friends and away from anyone you might embarrass yourself in front of.

“I’m not uncomfortable.” Everyone situates themselves, music playing in the background from one of the built in patio speakers, and you feel eyes on you as you sit there, suddenly realizing that they are waiting for you to take a sip.

“I dare you to chug that whole glass.” Jimin snickers from his spot next to you, already taking swigs from his own cup. He makes eye contact with Namjoon and Hoseok, who stare at you intently. “You won’t.”

“Is that a challenge?” You pose, fire lighting up your eyes.

“Do you accept?” You’re locked in a staring contest with Jimin, his expression playful as he studies you for any signs that you’ll back out. But you stay strong.

“Hell Yeah, I do.”

“Then drink up.” He clinks glasses with you and you throw it back, opening your throat to the liquid and gulping it down as painlessly as possible. What you don’t expect is the burn, and it hurts all the way going down, stinging your throat and warming your belly as it sits heavily in your stomach. The taste is what hits you next, and your throat almost closes up when you take a breath through your nose and taste just how strong the liquor is. Your friends cheer for you as you attempt to empty the glass, eyes watering because of the burn, and when the last drop disappears into your mouth, you pull the cup away to cough and sputter.

“I gotta admit, the girl’s got heart.” Namjoon claps slowly in awe of your feat. “Me and Hoseok bet Jimin that you wouldn’t drink at all tonight, and boy were we wrong.” He digs in his pocket for cash, each of them handing the younger boy the money in disbelief.

“It hurts,” You rasp, clutching your chest. “And it tastes terrible.”

“That’s the alcohol cleansing you,” Jin raises his glass toward you over the flames. “As I always say, alcohol is the best way to disinfect yourself of a sickness.”

“I believe it; it feels like I just chugged a bottle of bleach.” Taehyung hands you a bottle of water to rinse your mouth with, trying to get rid of the rubbing alcohol aftertaste. The night moves on from here, everyone splitting off into separate conversations, and you return to your original position of sitting and silently observing. Tae hasn’t said much to you tonight, though you do notice him staring a lot. You also notice the tension building on the other couch, Zoe and Jin looking apprehensive about something and Jungkook and Sooyun awkwardly trying to talk before deciding to sneak away and go somewhere more private. You wonder if anything will happen between them while they’re away, but they still can’t look each other in the eye so it’s probably unlikely. Jin and Zoe are the next to get up and leave. The drinks keep coming and you keep drinking, even joining in on a drinking game Hoseok came up with, and soon enough your body is feeling warm and your head is light and everything seems just a little bit better.

“Are you drunk?” Taehyung asks, mood as bright as the fire that still flickers wildly in front of you.

“I don’t know, you tell me.” Everything looks slightly warped in your vision and you aren’t even sure if you’re speaking properly anymore. You aren’t blackout drunk— though slightly more than tipsy— but Taehyung keeps a watchful eye on you because you’re starting to act a little funny. Your entire face is flushed up to your ears, eyes droopy and dazed expression plastered to your cheeks. This is exactly why you don’t drink. You hate looking sloppy and acting out of character, but with Taehyung looking so amused by your easy-going side and Jimin’s arm still wrapped around your shoulders, you don’t care about being judged. The dizziness doesn’t get better with your subsequent sips and you find yourself leaning to the side, resting your head on Taehyung’s broad shoulder. Jimin removes his arm when he sees you snuggling up to him, trying his absolute best not to bring attention to it in case you come to your senses and try to fix yourself.

“Yeah, you’re definitely drunk.” Tae’s deep voice murmurs, sounding far away. All you can do is groan. “I think you’re done for tonight, I’ll go get you some more water. Jimin, do you need anything?” His friend shakes his head, turning his attention back to the android beside him, who is in the middle of telling a story you assume, and then Tae is up and walking back into the house. You frown, instead moving to lay your head on one of Jimin’s thick thighs.

As soon as Yoongi finishes telling his story, you look up to both of them and smile. “What are you smiling at?” Jimin returns your grin, eyes equally as heavy and cheeks shiny and flushed. Even though you are drunk, you can tell that he is too.

“None of your business, thickums.” Nice to see you still have your quick tongue even in your current state.

“I saw you getting cozy with Taehyung just now. I thought he said you weren’t a couple?” Yoongi’s face is upside down and curious when you look up at it from your position on Jimin’s lap, craning your head back to get a view of him, and the odd sight makes you giggle like a little girl.

“We aren’t.”

“Oh. It just seemed like you were.” He processes this for a moment before nodding.

“You’re very handsome, Yoongi, you know that?” You blurt, catching him a little off guard. You’re sure that if he could blush, he would. “It’s no wonder Jimin’s been following you around and flirting this whole time.”

“No I haven’t!” He protests loudly, glancing over at the android, who still wears a blank expression. “I just think Yoongi is interesting and I want to get to know him.”

“Yeah right, pig.” You snort, trying to hold in your laughter.

“Pig? But he’s a human. Or is that another figure of speech?”

“Nope, he’s a pig in disguise, don’t trust him.” The android seems confused by your words, but picks up on your laughing and tone of voice, eventually laughing along. You are amazed both by his ability to pick up on social queues and learn quickly and by the fact that Jimin still hasn’t realized that he isn’t a human. You could tell him the truth about Yoongi, but that would ruin the fun.

“Anyway,” Jimin chuckles nervously, trying to change the subject back to you. “You and Tae must be getting along better, I haven’t heard you cuss each other out in a while.”

“I’ve turned a new leaf and I’m trying to be nicer to him. Apparently being nice is a lot easier than acting like a jerk all the time.”

“Aw, now we can all be friends and get along again, like old times.” He pinches your cheek and your smack his hand away.

“Like old times? The only reason I was nice to him back then is because I had a crush on you, dork. Don’t you remember?” This is common knowledge, it’s a well known fact among your friends that you had a crush on him, so you aren’t embarrassed by your blabbering mouth. You are, however, shocked by his.

“Of course I remember, but what kind of person would I be if I flirted back with the girl my best friend likes?”

“What?” You sit up abruptly, almost bumping heads in your haste to return to a sitting position.

“He was crushing on you so hard back then, it was almost painful to watch. I guess you didn’t notice because you were too busy falling over me. But I can’t blame you for that.” He adds with a flirty smirk, running a hand through his hair in the way you used to love. He isn’t important right now though. All you can focus on is what he has just said to you.

“He had a crush on me? Past tense?” You want to clarify this before you go jumping to conclusions like a lunatic.

“Past, present, and future. Don’t tell me you haven’t seen the way he’s been looking at you this entire time— you of all people, who possesses all-seeing eyes and notices practically everything.” There’s a doubtful look on his face, obviously too drunk to realize he’s just spilled one of the biggest secrets Taehyung has probably ever told him. You take into account the fact that your source is pretty intoxicated, most things that come out of his mouth will probably be unreliable, but you also know that alcohol leads to #NoFilterJimin, which means that what he’s saying is most likely all true. Taehyung likes you. You open your mouth to say more, even if you haven’t thought of a question to vocalize yet, but before you can get a syllable out, a weight plops down behind you on the couch, holding out a water bottle for you to take.

“For you, m’lady.” Your hand closes around it gingerly, careful not to touch fingers with him, and he offers you a bubbly smile, your stomach doing flips. Thinking back on it— the jealousy towards barista Kai, his clinginess to you, the boner he was sporting last night— they could all be signs that he likes you. Maybe. You don’t particularly believe it, but Taehyung is a pretty good actor and you imagine it wouldn’t be hard to hide his feelings, especially since he sealed them behind the pretense of living to annoy you. And now that you realize the possibility of it, you don’t really know how to feel. Jimin offers no support, he barely knows what he’s just done, and Yoongi doesn’t know anything about your dynamic with Tae apart from what he’s seen in the past two days, so you’re on your own now, with Sooyun and Zoe nowhere in sight, most likely sorting out their own problems, and Namjoon and Hoseok making out drunkenly on the other side of the fire.

Jimin, Taehyung, and Yoongi pick up conversation easily as if nothing happened, but you can’t bring yourself to engage. Taehyung sits just a little bit closer to you, now feeling confident enough to be clingy with you like he is with the others, but your brain is still overthinking each one of his actions to determine if you should believe it or not. If you should believe that he really has feelings for you. It’s hard for you to imagine that someone you have mistreated for so long could like you in any way, but Taehyung is a stubborn one and he’s certainly persistent. If he did feel this way, you are at least thankful that he hasn’t tried to make a move on you yet. Zoe and Sooyun return, talking about their own set of problems on the far end of the other couch, and you decide not to bother them tonight.

“I think I’m gonna head in for the night. I can feel a bad headache coming and I’d rather be in bed by the time it hits.” You feel nearly sobered by now, the bottle of water and interesting news helping to pull you back to your senses.

“You’ll probably feel a little nauseous too, try not to throw up in the house or else Jin’s mom will kill you.” Jimin jokes, and you let out a fake laugh.

The man beside you seems a bit suspicious by your shift in mood— just a few minutes ago you were feeling fine, but he can’t quite put his finger on it. The guys let you leave, Tae offering to help you get to the room if you’re too drunk, but you assure him that you’re fine and leave alone. He watches you until you disappear into the house, eyes staring longingly in your direction. A heavy sinking feeling digs into his chest, sensing that something is wrong, and although he knows he didn’t do anything, it still feels like it’s his fault. Personally, he was looking to spend a few more hours with you like this, having fun and completely laid back, not yelling at him or apologizing about anything, just hanging out like real friends. The spot where your head was resting on his shoulder and chest feels empty without you and he regrets running away, wishing he would have stayed like that for a few more minutes, but he was surprised and didn’t know what to do about you touching him, so he had to remove himself from the situation. He even gave himself a little pep talk in the kitchen in preparation to deal with your snuggly drunk persona, but now the opportunity is long gone and he fears it might be gone forever.

Sleep finds you easily tonight, but your worries follow you into slumber, dreams plagued by a plot line that makes you toss and turn. In your dream, you are still drunk, but Taehyung takes care of you like a loving boyfriend would. He brings you water and snacks, helps you walk around and holds you by the hips to keep you steady, and even sits with you in the bathroom while you vomit your guts out, wiping your mouth and forehead and holding back your hair. At one point, you and him leave the lake house, walking all the way to a nearby town and ending up in a high school gymnasium where you pin him to the wall and demand that he take you right there on the bleachers. When you go to kiss him, he stops you and reveals that he put poison in all of your drinks tonight and you collapse to the floor, coughing and trying to force yourself to throw it all up. You wake up dry heaving, tumbling out of bed and into the bathroom where you empty your stomach into the toilet loudly and attempt to catch your breath. It’s the middle of the night now, so Taehyung is in bed already, and he gets up to check if you’re okay, only to be sent away from the door when he offers his help. When you emerge after a few long minutes, you find a cold glass of water on your bedside table and a sleepy boy on the other side of the pillow fort.

“Can you stop bringing it up please?” Zoe groans from her spot at the picnic table, looking like she just wants to curl up underneath it.

“There’s nothing to be ashamed of, babe, own it.” Jin states proudly, shoulders looking extra high this afternoon. Today is your last full day at the lake house, a gorgeous Sunday afternoon, and just as planned, you’ve set up a picnic outside by the lakeside. All day Hoseok and Namjoon have been teasing Jin and Zoe about their morning exploits, which they could hear from the other side of these thin walls. Seems like they finally found the time to consummate their relationship and get the deed done. They both seem satisfied and happy, but you’re starting to feel embarrassed for them with all the teasing.

“Okay everyone, stop targeting them, let them be happy for once.” You announce, tired of hearing about it while you’re eating. Zoe gives you a grateful look. Despite sporting a hangover, you find yourself in a pleasant mood for the most part. Last night is a little fuzzy, though not totally forgotten, but you have no negative feelings about what happened. That was a really weird dream though. There is one person that doesn’t seem to be as high spirited as usual today, however. He sits there quietly picking at his food looking quite thoughtful, if that was possible.

“What’s wrong, Tae? Hungover?” Jimin pats him on the back and this startles him. Shaking his head lightly, the taller man clears his throat, glancing at you before lowering his gaze back to his food shyly. “Did something happen?”

It’s almost funny how Jimin doesn’t realize that he was the one who caused all of this by sharing a secret to the wrong person. You hoped Taehyung wouldn’t catch on to how distant you were being this morning, keeping away from him conveniently so you could have more time to interpret your dream and dispel the awkwardness of knowing he saw you vomiting late last night, but it appears that he did notice and was taking it the wrong way. You aren’t upset with him— he wasn’t the one who did anything wrong— you just don’t know how to feel about him now. Your own feelings are jumbled up in your head and you don’t know how to sort them or even how to describe what they are. For some reason, finding out Taehyung likes you isn’t as revolting as you thought, and you’re starting to notice the little twinge you get in your heart whenever he looks at you. Do you like him? It’s starting to get ridiculous how much you’ve discovered about yourself in just one weekend. And there’s that feeling again.

You catch him staring at you, studying your body language to see if he can figure out what’s different. The weird feeling comes back the longer you look at each other, so you open your mouth to dispel the tension. “Is there something on my face or something?” Dammit, you didn’t mean for it to come out like that, and now everyone is looking at you in disappointment.

“No.” Taehyung drops his head again, and you turn to the girl beside you to find her glaring at you heatedly. Sooyun speaks with her eyes, expressing how she’s disappointed in you because she thought you were making progress- they all did. And now you have to apologize.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to say it like that.” You reply meekly, not even looking at him.

“I told you to stop apologizing to me.” He mumbles, and you roll your eyes. Your friends look between the two of you, unable to figure out what exactly is happening right now. Were you upset? Was he upset? Should they be worried?

“Did something bad happen last night? You two were doing so well yesterday.” Zoe asks in a hurt voice, almost as if the turbulence between you is her own fault and failure. Taehyung lets you answer because, frankly, he’s wondering the same thing.

“Nothing bad happened, everything is fine.” You don’t sound the least bit convincing and even you cringe when you hear yourself.

“Doesn’t seem like it.” Zoe crosses her arms over her chest, pursing her lips in that motherly way that forces you to talk.

“I-It’s just a little weird now because he saw me puking last night. It was kind of embarrassing.” You scratch the back of your neck when you feel it prickle with color, probably because of the partial lie you’ve just told.

“Is that really it?” Tae doesn’t believe you. He straightens up, narrowing his eyes to catch every change in your expression.

“Yes?” The entire table bursts into complaints, calling you out on lying, saying that they can read you like an open book, some of them defending Taehyung and arguing that you owe him an explanation for your behavior. You’ve never seen them so invested in your drama, but then again, you’ve never really had any drama before. Jin stops everyone and addresses you.

“As much as I’d love for you to spill the tea to us right here, I think you and Tae need to go somewhere private and talk it out. Seriously.” With that, you’re kicked out of the table and sent away, told not to come back until you’ve worked out your issues.

“Faye,” Twigs crunch beneath your shoes as you walk along the lake near the tree line, hands crossed at your front and eyes scanning everywhere but him. When he calls your name again, you turn to look at him, feeling your heart skip a beat once more. Why does he have to look so good at a time like this— when you’re confused and conflicted, still processing everything that you’ve learned both about him and yourself in the past few days? “Are you going to say something?”

“I don’t know what to say.” At least you’re honest.

“Okay, then I’ll start.” He takes a deep breath, eyes looking up at the sky and leaves above as he speaks. “Are you upset about something that happened last night? Did I do something? Did Jimin say something to offend you?”

“I told you, I’m just embarrassed about the whole bathroom incident,” So much for honesty. But what else are you supposed to do? Rat out his best friend for having a big mouth and accidentally confessing for him?

“But you started acting weird way before that happened. It was when I left to get water while we were at the fire pit, I know it. I just don’t know why.” You stay silent, swallowing the lump of anxiety in your throat. You don’t want to tell him, but you really want to ask if what Jimin said is true.

“I... found out that you possibly have a crush on me.” You admit slowly, looking up at his face. It contorts into confusion, then slight realization, then a mixture of humiliation and... relief? So many emotions flash across his face that you can barely keep up.

“How did you ‘find out?’” He’s stopped walking by now.

“That doesn’t matter. Is it true?” You must look somewhere between desperate and hopeful because Taehyung pauses for what seems like an eternity before bursting into laughter.

“Are you kidding?” Usually his laugh can lighten a mood, but all it does is make you more tense.

“I’m completely serious right now.”

“So am I.” The wind blows between your bodies, sounding almost deafening in the silence. “Of course I have a crush on you, how could I not? You’re everything I want in a girl from looks to charm and attitude, and no matter what you do, that’s not going to change.”

“Oh.” For one of the first times ever, Taehyung has made you speechless. There is no witty comeback or confident response to counter his attack and you truly stand at a loss for words.

“I never tried to confess to you because it was pretty clear that you didn’t even like me as a friend that much, so I spent most of my energy just trying to get you to pay attention to me in any way I could. In hindsight, I probably didn’t choose the best method.”

“So you did all that just to get my attention?”

“Well, yeah. You wouldn’t even look at me if I didn’t.” Sooyun was right, and so were all the movies. Boys really do do stupid things when they like someone. “So?”

“So, what?”

“So, how do you feel about all of this? I just admitted my feelings to you, the least you can do is give me a reaction.” His eyebrows are furrowed intensely, worry floating around the irises of his eyes. Any trace of confidence he once had has disappeared and all that’s left is anxiety that eats him from the inside.

“I don’t know how I feel. I don’t usually do this.”

“Do what?”

“Talk about... feelings.” Judging by the way you still hold a mostly neutral face, he can tell that deep down you do know. And considering how you haven’t run away in completely and utter disdain, disgust, and repulsion, he assumes that he still has a chance. “Tae, this is a lot. We only just became close yesterday.”

“But we’ve known each other way longer than that. Be honest with me, I can handle if you tell me you don’t feel the same, but I need to know.”

“I...” Fuck, why can’t you reject him? You’re immune to puppy eyes and pouting, there’s no way he could guilt you into anything this time, but you’re starting to think that you really don’t want to reject him. It’s only now that you realize how fast your heart is beating, practically leaping out of your chest in a way that’s uncharacteristic for you.

“Do you need convincing?” It sounds like a genuine question from him, but his eyes are locked on to your lips with a thirst that makes your insides quiver. You think back to the dream you had last night and how realistic your need to kiss him felt, and how badly you want to experience his kiss in real life.

“Convincing?”

“Just a little something to make your decision a little easier.” He doesn’t even realize he’s leaning in to you, tongue peeking out to wet his lips in anticipation, and you find yourself unconsciously following his lead. You should push him away now, tell him no and reject him like he’s expecting you to before this goes too far. Deep down, however, you know you can’t do that because you can feel those butterflies in your stomach the closer he gets. He stops a hair away from your lips, eyes looking down at you for confirmation— he wants you to give him a definite answer and you know he probably won’t move until he gets that from you, so you do the only thing you know will show your certainty, and dive in and kiss him.

Even though you’re the one that kissed him first, you still hesitate against his lips when he responds, but wow this feels good. It feels better than good. It feels like you’re finally doing the one thing you never knew you needed and now that it’s happening, you are filled with an inconceivable amount of gratification. His lips melt into yours, moving at the perfect rhythm and keeping you engaged, one of his hands creeping up to hold gently onto the back your neck. He’s a much better kisser than you expected— not that you’ve thought about it before— and it’s almost hard for you to pull yourself away when you feel it getting a little too heated.

“Did that help at all?” He asks with a sly grin when your eyes remain closed. They snap open, realizing that this is real life this time and not a dream, and a panic creeps up into your chest.

“No.” You’re sure he can see how heavy your breathing is, trying your best to convince yourself not to run away from him. But you do anyway. “I need- um, c-can you give me some time to think about it?”

“Oh, uh, sure.” You don’t wait up for him, giving a few nervous glances before starting off in the direction of the lake house. He doesn’t follow immediately, standing there scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. No matter what you say, you’re still the one that kissed him and he takes solace in that. Even if you don’t have the guts to face it, he now knows that you’re attracted to him in some way, and if you don’t talk ever again after this he’s fine with having kissed you at least once.

When you get back to the picnic, you don’t have an appetite anymore, so you make up an excuse and head into the woods somewhere for some privacy. You bring your sketchbook, yet you don’t draw and instead sit alone with your thoughts just staring off into space. You return about 15 minutes later feeling a little less confused, but you steer clear of Taehyung and Jimin, not wanting to talk to either of them just yet because you know Jimin will ask a million questions. Sooyun leaves you alone too, offering you the same courtesy you gave her when you didn’t force her to talk about Jungkook. This weekend has been full of uncharacteristic behavior for you but it seems like you’ve finally come to your senses and reverted back to normal. The rest of the day is spent silently observing everyone and not really engaging in anything. A few people go swimming in the lake again, but this time you decide to stay inside and watch a bit of tv to take your mind off things. Plus, you were tired of getting bug bites out by the water.

In the middle of your period of solitude, while mindlessly watching reruns of Family Feud, you come across a problem that presents itself as an eight legged creature that crawls in front of you on the coffee table, right next to your can of soda. It’s so big that you can see almost every detail of its body from where you sit on the sofa, and the scream you let out shakes the whole house. But there’s no one there to hear it. So now you’re standing on the expensive piece of furniture, yelling your lungs out while trying to get your brain to function again in order to figure out what to do. Obviously, you need to kill it. But you’re too afraid to get anywhere near that thing— let alone put your hand down there— so that’s out of the question. Your nerve completely dissolves when it starts crawling again, this time towards you, prompting you to jump off the couch and hide all the way across the room on shaky limbs. Then the solution enters.

Just then, Taehyung steps through the front door, brows knit in concern from hearing your screams. “Faye?” Despite your better judgement, you rush over to him and pull him deeper inside, clinging to his arm like he was your life line. All you can do is point to the table where the bug resides with its can of soda— there’s no way you’re going to drink out of it after this, it can have it. “Is that what all the noise is about? A spider?” He chuckles, loving the way you still hold onto him even when he steps in to get a closer look.

“Can you take care of it, please?” Almost in tears, you beg him to help, not caring about anything that’s happened before this moment. You just want it gone. And he’s the right person for the job because Taehyung has never been afraid of bugs.

He moves quickly, grabbing an empty cup and a napkin, and swiftly sweeps the spider up, walking over to the door to free it outside in the grass. It’s precious how he values life like that, although you also wouldn’t mind if he took a hammer to that thing. You thank him with red cheeks, wiping your eyes and attempting to look less like a mess. It’s quiet up until he leaves, pausing at the door after getting water from the kitchen before deciding against talking to you and leaving. You appreciate that he’s giving you space. You also appreciate how he came to your rescue even after you ran away from him earlier, that little stunt just made him a tiny bit more attractive in your eyes, much to your regret. Things seem to feel a bit lighter after that and the night ends with you making more of an effort to be casual with him.

“I call the shower,” He announces to you as you settle yourself in bed. He must be really good at acting because it appears that everything is fine to him, even though you know your indecisiveness is eating away at him on the inside. “Do you need me to check the room for spiders before I go?” He teases, eyes crinkling when you scowl at him.

“That was a moment of weakness, you can’t tease me for that.”

“I think it’s completely fair after you teased me for being scared of the rope swing yesterday.” He shuffles through his bag looking for his bathroom things, long fingers searching for the items languidly. They catch your attention, looking so long and beautiful and a sudden ache forms between you legs when you think of how they would feel deep inside you. What? Where did that come from?

“I didn’t tease you, that was Jimin and Hobi. All I did was laugh.” Your eyes follow his arms as they close his bag, a hint of a muscle peeking out under his sleeve when he lifts it to move it out of the way. And then the shirt comes off.

“Same thing.” Your mouth goes dry when you see his bare torso again, something feeling different about it from when you saw it yesterday at the lake when you were with the others. “I won’t tell anyone else about it, but if you ever see another bug while we’re here, you know who to call.” He winks, sending your stomach fluttering.

“My hero.” You disguise the heat pooling in your stomach with sarcasm, focusing hard on not letting your eyes linger on his bare skin. At the same time, Taehyung peers at you in the same way, neither of you looking at the other’s face as you lose track of what you were even talking about. If he had been looking, he probably would have seen the lust and longing in your stare. He clears his throat before you can work up the nerve to address the elephant in the room and enters the bathroom without another word, escaping the heat that engulfs the room slowly.

That kiss earlier had a bigger effect on you than you had originally anticipated. Just the sight of him shirtless is now enough to short circuit the rational part of your brain and you finally come to terms with the fact that there’s something here. You feel something towards him— something that isn’t annoyance or hate, but more like lust and deep emotion. Sooyun was right, you care about him more than you let on, and you now acknowledge that you’ve been in denial. As soon as you push through that denial, though, you feel an intense need for him to be close to you. It felt so good standing close and kissing him, it sent tingles down your body and to your core that you’ve never experienced before. And now that you know how stupid you’ve been, the sexual tension within you has reached its boiling point. You need to come clean to him.

As soon as he walks out of the steamy bathroom, he finds you staring at the door, pillow barrier now disassembled in the middle of the bed where you crawl over to the edge to sit on your knees. Your face is serious, demanding his attention because you must have something important to say. He drops his dirty clothes on his bag, turning his body and full attention to you.

“Taehyung,”

“Faye.”

“I’ve thought about what you said all day today and I know where I stand now.” Your fingers fumble in your lap but the nervousness doesn’t reach your face. “I maybe... possibly...” His eyes narrow at you and you stop yourself. “I have feelings for you. And even though you’re still an idiot and this realization is distressing for me, I have to come to terms with it.”

“That has to be the worst confession I’ve ever heard.” He chuckles, not at all taking this as seriously as you’d want him to.

“I’m not done yet.” You put up a hand, surprising him with your attitude. “I also realized that I’m horny as fuck and that this is our last night together, so I don’t want to have any regrets.”

“What are you saying?” He shifts his weight and crosses his arms, trying to control the twitch of his lips that signify his cockiness. You want to slap him.

“I’m saying that I want you to fuck me. Right now.” His sly expression no longer fazes you, his tongue poking into his cheek coyly almost as if he knows just how sexy you find it. Your thighs press together slightly at the way he eats you up with his eyes.

“One kiss got you this hot and bothered?” He attempts to dial down his amusement, but it’s radiating off of him.

“A few dirty sentences got you hard?” You counter, looking pointedly at the hand that has dropped to his crotch to palm himself over his sleep shorts. “You know, I could take care of that for you.”

“You sure you could handle it?” He smirks, stalking toward you with an ease that sets your heart racing. His nose brushes yours when he plants his hands on your bare thighs, goosebumps erupting all over from the contact. You stare intensely at each other for a few breathless seconds, testing each other for who will flinch first, eyes alight with challenge. You’ve never seen his pupils so blown, a dominance taking over them that you haven’t yet experienced, but you aren’t one to back down easily. He claims your mouth roughly, gripping your chin to tilt your head to meet him at a better angle so he can infiltrate your mouth with his tongue the moment you part your lips with his. A fire burns in your core, liquefying your insides and causing them to seep into the crotch of your panties with every movement of his tongue against yours. “Don’t start things you can’t finish, princess.”

Your teeth bite down on his bottom lip at the pet name, not hard enough to hurt but enough to send a message that he receives clearly. “Don’t.” Your shy murmur causes him to grow ten times more confident, a mischievous grin finding his lips at the way it’s affected you.

“You like that? I would’ve never guessed.” The dark chuckle that escapes him is cut off by his own lips, pressing quickly against yours before dragging down your jaw to mouth at your neck. The fluttering in your chest makes your head spin, breaths coming out as short huffs against the side of his face as he works his lips on your pulse point. Your eyes close for a split second and the next thing you know, your back is crashing down onto the mattress, Taehyung’s firm body squeezing between the gap of your thighs and large hands pressed in the sheets beside your head. The wet of his tongue slides down your collarbone, pulling gasps from you with the beautiful patterns they create, trailing all the way down to the beginning of your shirt. The garment comes off in a blur, bare chest and hard nipples now exposed to the open air and Taehyung’s awed gaze.

“Touch them, please.” Whiny and desperate, you arch your chest into him to encourage the kisses to continue, your nipples literally tingling in anticipation. He gawks at the sight, collecting your wrists in one hand to pull your arms above your head.

“Fuck,” He breathes, grinding his hips into yours and alerting you to the growing bulge pressed to your thigh. His tongue darts out to lick over a nipple, circling the bud lightly before sucking it into his mouth, and you bite down on your lips to keep your noises at bay. There’s never been a more perfect sight than witnessing Taehyung peer up at you with smoldering eyes and a boob in his mouth, nibbling on it and studying your face for reactions. Your other breast is given the same treatment, and when he pulls away, you’re left with cold, wet marks that reach from the underside of your tits to the top of your chest. “You don’t have to be quiet, you know. I don’t give a fuck who hears.”

“Neither do I.” You purse your lips at him, defying him in a way that makes him growl deep in his throat, eyebrows shooting up. He’s already established his dominance over you, with your hands immobilized above your head and all, but that doesn’t change the fact that you’re still stubborn. If he wanted you to scream, he would have to earn it.

“That’s how you want to play this? We’ll see about that.” The pressure on your wrists disappears when he reaches down to grip your hips, flipping you over like you weigh nothing and moving you to the middle of the bed. “On your knees, ass up.” His voice is thick and deep, leaving no room for negotiation as you scramble to follow his orders, limbs trembling with excitement. Your panties are absolutely soaked by now and he can tell just by running his fingers over the material that if it weren’t for them, you’d be dripping down your thighs. Your shorts and panties slide down to your knees with ease, restricting you when you try to spread your legs wider for him as he inspects you. “Look how you’ve ruined your cute bear panties,” He coos, running a finger up your slit to collect your juices. They’re the same ones he found in your suitcase on Friday. “All from a few kisses and getting you’re titties sucked. You’re a horny little one, aren’t you, princess?”

You don’t say anything— can’t— because you’re too busy holding back the moans in your throat. His smooth fingers trace your lower lips, spreading you apart so he can get a view of you in all your glory. “Mmm,” You whine lowly, curving your hips backward toward his face to get him to stop staring and do something.

“You look so good bent over like this for me. That pussy looks so sweet.” He’s watering at the mouth just looking at you, your tight hole clenching around nothing at his words. His eyes roam from your dripping essence to your throbbing clit to the roundness of your ass, all of it looking so delicious that he doesn’t know what he wants to touch more. The tips of his fingers are right there, teasing your entrance just to watch you squirm before finally pushing in, slipping two digits in easily without any discomfort. The wetness engulfs him, making lewd sounds when he moves them in and out slowly, mesmerized by the sight of you sucking him in. He dips down for a taste, licking his way upwards from your clit to where his fingers push inside you, catching everything that spills out. “You taste sweet too.” He groans.

“Faster,” You whisper, only to receive a hard slap on the ass with his free hand. You moan for the first time tonight, surprised yet still fairly quiet, your walls clamping down around the two fingers he still pumps into you.

“You’re in no position to make demands, princess. You already pissed me off, you’re lucky I’m even giving you this.” His hand comes down on the other cheek, a loud smack echoing through the room, and you bet everyone in the house could hear it. He doesn’t increase his pace, but he does go deeper, working his way into your depths with a few deep strokes before adding another finger, making your eyes roll back.

“Oh, fuck..”

“You like that, huh? What did you say to me the other night? I have alien fingers?” The edge in his voice makes him seem angry, but you can tell by the way his free hand keeps massaging your ass that he’s just turned on. “Answer me.”

“Yes,” You whimper, barely able to control your own voice with how deeply he reaches inside you.

“Bet you appreciate them now,” He goads, curling upwards intentionally at just the right spot. You buck your hips back, gasping when he does it again and lowers his mouth back to your clit, tongue flicking and swirling around the bud with skills you didn’t think he possessed. Guess all the porn he’s been watching has finally paid off. He slurps at your juices, making obscene noises that make you feel light headed, the combination of his fingers and tongue driving you to the point of madness.

Having started off on your elbows, you now lay on your chest, arms splayed out and gripping onto the sheets for mercy, teeth biting into the material as a last ditch effort to contain your noises. Moans muffle into the mattress leaving a wet spot from your saliva, and it’s all you can do not to scream out. He doesn’t deserve to hear you moan yet, you don’t want to give him the satisfaction, but your body doesn’t care about your stubborn agenda, it only cares about how good it feels to have Taehyung spread you with his gorgeous fingers in preparation for his cock that is undoubtedly straining in his shorts.

“T-Tae,” You gape, feeling your approaching high.

“I’m not gonna stop until I hear you moan for me— which means I’m not going to give you this dick as long as you decide to keep up this game of yours.” He’s stern, strict about his rules no matter how badly he wants to feel your tight pussy wrapped around him. But you’ve made him wait this long for it, what’s 5 more minutes when he’ll finally get to hear your angelic voice cry out for him? He adds a twist to his wrist, your insides quivering uncontrollably around the digits. You’ve never had fingers this long before and the sensation is heavenly, you can’t wait to feel how big his cock is. Dick jokes aside, you’ve seen his imprint on several occasions and tried not to look, but now you’ll finally get to see it uncovered and your core throbs at the thought. His tongue adds more pressure to your clit when he feels this, fingers prodding with more force and speed until you can no longer hold it in and let loose the noises that were chocked up in your chest.

“Oh my god,” You claw, voice projecting out from your diaphragm at full volume. Taehyung lets out a pleased hum on your lips and you can feel his cheeks lift into a smile. “Don’t stop, don’t stop, please!” Boiling, building heat swirls in your stomach, threatening to throw you off of your knees the closer it gets to bubbling over, but his hand is wrapped tightly around your thigh to keep you upright, digging his face in your cunt the more you try to slip away. Your wetness is dripping down his chin and wrist by now, coating everything in its path with never ending lube that sloshes around the incessant thrusting of his hand. The heat is too much, you can’t take it anymore, and with a series of high pitched moans and cries of his name, you cum, quaking and grinding into his palm with every wave that crashes through you.

“Good girl,” Taehyung praises, sounding short of breath himself. His damp lips kiss up your thighs, leaving a trail of wetness in the few places that were untouched by your juices. He retracts his fingers from you gingerly, mindful of your sensitivity, and finally lets you collapse to the bed in a heaving, boneless heap. “I knew you’d sound hot when you came, but damn,” He chuckles, relieving you of your shorts and underwear entirely, pulling off his own offending garments while he’s at it. “I almost came just listening to you. Are you going to be good from now on?”

When you turn yourself onto your side and look at him, you catch sight of his angry erection, colored red and shiny with precum and pressure. He tugs at it impatiently, eyes boring into yours just daring you to disobey him again. “Yes, Sir.” You don’t miss how his cock twitches at the name.

He’s demonstrated his patience with things like this, but you can tell it’s wearing thin as he squeezes himself at the base, a long drop of precum oozing down onto your hip. His length is the longest you’ve seen, not slacking in the thickness department either, and you just know he’s going to tear you apart— but in the best way possible. You’re wet enough to take him right now, though the stretch might be a little uncomfortable, but you’re tired of waiting to feel him.

“Sure you can take it?” He asks one more time, tapping it on your ass a few times.

“I don’t care, I want you to fuck me open either way.” At this he grins, biting his lip because he always knew you had a dirty mouth, but then he pauses. “What are you waiting for?” You ask, worry creeping up on you that for some reason he could be backing out. He shuts his eyes as if thinking hard, gears grinding like he knows he’s forgotten something, and then he opens them and looks at you in realization.

“Condom.” In your haste, you had forgotten everything you’ve leaned about safety in health class, not even thinking about protection up until now. He seems a little panicked and you assume that means he doesn’t have one, but you remember the one condom you kept “just in case” that you threw into the beside drawer without a care. Thank goodness for Yoongi. You point and Taehyung nearly lunges over you to get to it, tearing open the package faster than you can even blink and sliding it on with a deep moan. “Ready?”

“Absolutely.” With a hand on your ass to spread you open for him, Tae lines up his tip with your entrance, running it along your slit for lubrication before thrusting inside languidly. He almost goes all the way in on the first stroke, the stretch feeling better than expected as you take him in inch by inch, trying to relax your muscles to welcome his entrance. The small sounds you make every time he pushes deeper makes his head spin with a rush of adrenaline, fueling every subsequent movement until he’s as deep as he can go without forcing himself.

“God, you feel so good, princess.” He pants. It’s a snug fit, to say the least, and it takes everything in him to keep calm and give you time to adjust. “Can I move?” As soon as you nod, he retracts his hips, snapping them a bit more shallowly but enough to have you moaning out. Your sensitive walls massage him so well that it’s hard for him to even keep up a steady rhythm, let alone focus on not going too hard, but that’s not what you want.

“Taehyung,” You call, meeting his eyes. “Fuck me.”

“Yeah?” He seems strained, unsure if he should or not, but you’re well adjusted now and want nothing more than for him to let go of all restraint and pound into you.

“Yeah. I can take it, please,” You beg. A purposeful squeeze around his length is all it takes for him to give in. He growls as he repositions you back on your knees, one hand pressing down your lower back and the other sliding a fluffy pillow under your hips to keep you up.

“Just say ‘stop’ if it gets too much, okay princess?” He murmurs into your ear, leaning forward to kiss tenderly along your shoulder blades. Gripping at your waist again, he straightens up and watches his first few strokes, cock covered in your wet sheen thoroughly. Seeing this makes him snap, and suddenly you’re being catapulted face first into the bed as he pounds roughly inside of you, hands digging into your hips to keep you up.

Your moans cut through the air along with the sound of his rapid thrusting, hips meeting your ass so hard that you can feel shockwaves traveling up your spine. The pace is fast and rough, so fast that you can barely catch a breath in between thrusts— but you don’t need oxygen anymore. You only need Taehyung’s cock fucking inside of you right now, so good that you’d trade breathing for this feeling anytime.

“You’re so... fucking... tight.” He groans loudly, reaching for your hair with one hand. It pulls on your roots, forcing your head to crane back and back to arch wildly. He hits differently this way, going deeper and harder in the new angle, tip nudging at your cervix in a mixture of pain and pleasure that makes your toes curl in the sheets, wetness gushing out of you and adding to the cacophony of noises that fill the room. Rocking back towards him, you meet him thrust for thrust on your shaky legs, begging for him to pull your hair harder. “Look at you, acting like a dirty little slut for me. I would have fucked this tight pussy ages ago if I knew how freaky you were.” He grins, holding onto your makeshift ponytail harshly and riding you like the reigns on a horse. “You like it rough don’t you? Want me plow you with my big cock until you’re screaming, huh?”

“Fuck yes, give me more!” The high pitch whininess of your voice contrasts with his bass, both of you moaning in sync when he lets go of your hair and splays his hands across your back, using his weight to move faster inside of you.

“Stay still and take this cock,” He grunts when you jolt forward, caught between wanting to move away from him and rocking yourself back to feel everything he has to offer. His moans get louder and more frequent above you, his eyes squeezed shut and mouth agape as he gets lost in how high he feels while he’s inside you. Every little whimper and moan you make just edges him on and he has to slow himself down before he finishes too early. Shoving himself in deep, he grinds against you, removing his hands from your back to lean over your body. You can feel the sweat dripping off of him onto your back, your own skin feeling so hot you thought the liquid would evaporate on first contact. The reprieve from his hardcore pace doesn’t offer you any relief, his grinding allowing you to feel all the points where his skin rubs against yours, a sticky mixture of sweat and your arousal binding you together in a way that feels sinfully good. His hand slaps your ass a few times, watching it jiggle from the impact, and you tighten around him a little more each time he hits. “Your cunt is so good you almost made me cum early.” He admits, sitting back on his haunches and pulling you up by your arms.

You let out a breathless chuckle, the noise quickly replaced by a gasp when he starts pounding into you again, your head thrown back on his shoulder and one arm reaching up into his hair. His hands roam on their own accord, skimming up your front and sides to squeeze at your bouncing breasts, thumbs circling your nipples to pull drawn out moans from you. One of his hands slides a little further, teasing the skin at the base of your neck as if asking for permission, and when you moan his name, he takes that as his cue and wraps his long fingers around your throat. It’s light at first, but he slowly constricts around you, cutting off your airflow just the slightest bit, just enough to give your head a slight buzz and heighten the feeling of his touch.

“Tae, it feels so good.” You mewl, your free hand coming up to grab onto your abandoned breast as he steadily picks up pace again. Hearing him pant and grunt and groan into your ear is hotter than you could have imagined, and he’s not afraid to vocalize how amazing you feel around him. He’s louder than you at this point, still being drowned out by the sloppy sounds of your pussy and his thighs slapping together, and you almost want to silence yourself just to listen to the sounds he makes for you. He moans your name, holding you up by the throat as he once again loses himself in the rhythmic tightening of your core. You’re close, he can feel it, and he can’t think of anything he wants to feel more than you cumming while he’s deep within you.

“Play with yourself, princess. Rub that pretty clit.” He whispers into your ear, nibbling onto the lobe and kissing down your neck. As soon as your fingers touch the swollen nub, your cries get exponentially louder, curses tumbling from your lips as you chase your high. A tightness forms in your lower abdomen, coiling and winding like a spring that’s ready to snap. For the moments leading up to your orgasm, you think you stop breathing, face stuck in a silent scream from the building pleasure. “I want you to cum on my cock, baby. Cum for me now.” He demands lowly, eyes focused on the side of your face as you follow his command, spring unfurling in your core and sending you flying into ecstasy. You take in a broken gasp, eventually letting out a strangled cry of his name into the open air, walls fluttering and pulsating around his member. “Shit,”

Taehyung releases your neck, letting you fall into the mattress, your clenching walls dislodging him from your heat. But he’s quick to clamber over you, straddling your thighs and adjusting the pillow under you to lift your hips up. He spreads your ass cheeks with his palms, inserting himself back into you swiftly and starting an easy speed. His fingertips are gentle when they reach to push your hair away from your face, neck craning down to connect your lips.

“You did so well for me, princess.” His lips mumble against your own. You can feel his cock throbbing with every thrust he delivers. “I’m gonna cum so hard.” He rasps, looping his arms under your own to immobilize you, his grunts getting louder and more aggressive with the slap of his hips. You wish you could see what he looks like right now, muscles flexing and skin dewy with the sweat he’s worked up, entire body flushed with effort to bring him to his high. You offer help, grinding up against him when his pace falters a little, lacing your fingers with his own. “Keep grinding your hips on me, princess. Yeah, just like that. I love how tight you squeeze me.”

“Your cock made me feel so good, Tae.” You squeak, bending your legs to rest your heels on his ass to feel his strong muscles.

“Yeah? You want me to cum for you?” He asks, face tucked into the crook of your shoulder.

“Please,” You whine. “Give it to me.”

His hips pick up at your words, pounding you hard and fast to get him there. He locks his feet around your calves and pulls your legs straight, pushing up onto his hands to get maximum power, letting out long, drawn out moans that rumble throughout the room, shaking you to your center as you lay there and take it. “I’m gonna cum, fuck!” His breathing is loud, knuckles white as he grips onto the sheets, giving his all into the last couple of thrusts before his loudest moan yet rips through the air. Cock pushing deeply as he cums, he drops down to his elbows on top of you and continues thrusting, softer now. You let him ride out his high, loving the feeling of him throbbing against your walls, spilling into the condom while he’s inside you.

When he comes down, you let him pull out and flop down beside you, both of you too weak to move for the moment. You feel empty without him and almost want to go over and sit on his dick before it’s fully soft again, but you refrain, letting your eyes fall shut.

“How was that for you?” He questions hesitantly while pulling off the condom, barely having enough energy to walk over and throw it in the trash.

“Holy shit,” Is all you can respond and the both of you laugh.

“It was good for me too...” A silence falls over the room and you fear what comes next, hoping it won’t be awkward, but it actually feels quite comfortable. He maneuvers your bodies so that you’re up against the pillows and turns out the light, neither of you wanting to do anything other than sleep.

Ugh, Monday mornings. Well, at least you hope it’s still morning. You and Taehyung were exhausted after your night together, passing out while still naked and barely under the covers. His cuddling habit hadn’t changed last night— and you didn’t expect it to— so you wake up wrapped tightly in his embrace, arms and legs both coiled around you like some sort of snake. It’s comfortable enough that you stay there, trying to ignore the fact that you’re literally both buck ass naked and tangled together, and watch his face for a minute. Last night he absolutely destroyed you. Your back feels stiff and your throat is sore and you aren’t really sure if your legs work anymore. Considering that no one has knocked on your door yet to wake you up, you assume that your friends haven’t left without you, but it’s probably a good idea to get ready to leave anyway.

Somehow, you manage to get Taehyung up and pull him to the shower, fighting away the shyness of him seeing you naked again to wash yourself properly. He smiles to himself when he sees the marks he left on your chest, the little bites and kisses will probably be visible in any tank top you decide to wear, so he hopes you have one decent shirt to conceal your upper half. You scold him for them, smacking him on the shoulder with your soapy hand, and things seem to be normal. You want them to be normal.

“There they are,” Jimin claps, eyes glittering with mischief. “The heroes of the night. The ones that kept us up until 3am.” You ignore everyone’s stares in favor of grabbing a bowl in the kitchen and choosing a cereal, hunger greatly outweighing humiliation. Actually, you’re not even embarrassed. You had some great sex last night and you’re happy about it, and they should be too.

“Tae seems to have a special glow this morning,” Hoseok adds, grinning. “Was it good?”

“Sounds like it was.” Namjoon snickers, pretending like he doesn’t notice your glare.

“Shut up you two, don’t act like we didn’t hear you breaking the bed last night way after us.” You snap, sticking your tongue out at both men. Their eyebrows shoot up. “And you can’t talk either Jimin, I know you spent the night in Yoongi’s room.”

“So now you’re defending him? Jesus, Tae, what did you do to her?” Jimin snorts, elbowing his friend playfully. Neither you nor Taehyung have a reaction to the further teasing, eating your food in silence and sharing looks with each other.

You’re saved from the teasing a few minutes later when Jungkook and Sooyun walk in hand in hand, hair mused and crust under their eyes. It’s clear they had an eventful night and sorted out their issues, much like you and Tae, and you wonder if they’re a couple now. You’ll ask Sooyun later for all the details. Zoe questions them with a raised eyebrow, looking them up and down when they stand embarrassed in the middle of the dining room. Jimin yells out the obvious, stating that they had sex and their faces explode into color. You don’t have enough energy to scold him again.

Leaving the lake house is almost peaceful for you, you feel like this is a suitable conclusion to your high school life, like you’ve found closure after your resolution, and that everyone is leaving happier than when they came. In the shower this morning, Tae asked if anything would change between you, expressing that he didn’t particularly expect anything to come out of this since you were about to leave for college. You told him the truth, that there’s no point in trying to develop your relationship this late in the game and that it’s better off if you just stay friends. He smiles at your rationality, easily agreeing and pulling you in for one more kiss. Your heart aches a little because you’ve missed possibly having a strong relationship with him during your high school years, but you’re ready to mature away from him. And besides, there’s always breaks and summer vacations to see each other, and plenty of chances to catch up with each other ;).

[eternalsehyoon]

Park Jinyoung - Beautiful stranger (part one)

Title: Beautiful Stranger

Pairing: Jinyoung x Reader

Words: 1.6k

Summary: You work in a café and meet a beautiful stranger. Being quite insecure when it comes to feelings, and completely naïve when it comes to guys flirting with you, you don’t really see how much this stranger is into you... until your much too involved best friend convinces you otherwise.

I was cleaning the tables in the tiny café I have been working to for the past three years and a half. As much as I told myself I despised it, it had become a part of my routine and I had built my circle of friends around it. The customers were all usual, except for the few occasional tourists. Which meant I could tell you the names of almost every client who walked in the café, and my coworkers were like my family. My goal was to be a best-selling author, but as you probably know, it's easier said than done. I had been working on my book since I got this crappy job, and even though the novel itself was complete, my perfectionist self couldn't dare to send it to a publishing company.

"Y/N!!" My colleague and, most importantly best friend Kim called. "I know how much you hate tying up your hair, but I swear to God Josie will kill you if she sees you serving food with your hair down." I simply sighed, rolling my eyes. I knew Kim was just checking out on me, but I couldn't help to be a tiny bit annoyed by her attitude. I lazily grabbed an elastic in the front pocket of my dark apron and rapidly tied my long brown hair in a messy bun. "See." I pointed to the top of my head. "Happy, now?"

"Very." She simply stated, with a wide smile plastered on her face. Her title had just bumped from simple waitress to assistant manager and she took her role way too seriously, if you ask me.

Kim made her way from behind the counter to literally five inches away from me in the span of a few seconds. My reflexes made me take a huge step back, but my friend quickly closed the space between us and approached her mouth to my left ear, only to whisper: "By the way, you know, just like that... You've been cleaning this same table for the last thirty minutes." I let out a slight chuckle, covering my mouth with my right hand. "I don't know what you're talking about." "Sure..." She rolled her eyes. "I'm certain it has nothing to do with the handsome young man sitting right there, a couple of tables away." She wasn't subtle at all, since she almost yelled out the last sentence. I looked over at the table in question, and thanked the Lord that the "young man" was wearing a large pair of headphones on his head.

I caught myself staring at him again, noticing every little detail. From the way he was holding his phone with one hand, to the way he was using the other to occasionally sip on his latte. I felt my heart skip a beat, what the hell was happening? His hands were veiny, and his fingers were slightly crooked but had a perfect length. His dark brown hair was falling on his forehead adorably, and I enjoyed the way he would grin every so often while looking down at his phone with a smile so genuine, he almost resembled a small child receiving his first toy.

It was the first time I had seen him, you know, he was far from our typical 60 year old customer. When he had entered the place, he shyly asked for a table for one and I escorted him to my favorite spot; a small round table accompanied by two leather-covered lazy boy type chairs, by the window. The bistro was practically empty, so he was the only customer I could take care of, if you didn't count the two elders who would occasionally ask me to refill their coffees. "M-my name is Y/N and I'll be your waitress today." I stuttered. I handed him our menu, and he simply nodded with a smirk appearing on his lips as a form of "thank you". "I'll be back in a couple of minutes to see if you've made your choice." He looked up at me and that's when I realized he had the most gorgeous dark brown eyes. "Earth to Y/N!!!!" Kim exclaimed, bringing me back to my senses. "Go ask him for his number, for God's sake, or I'll do it for you." She ordered, half-serious. I bursted out laughing. "If you think one second that I've got the guts to even do that, you don't fucking know me, Kim!" She cackled. "Don't make me do it, Y/N." She threatened me jokingly, while making her way to the counter to start a new batch of coffee.

Kim had been working here for the past five years; she could pour a cup of coffee, answer the phone and print receipts all at the same time. It impressed me how determined she was, since she was still a student and didn't plan on working here forever.  I followed her steps, only to print the stranger's receipt, since he had been in here for the past hour and a half. I awkwardly strutted towards the customer, "Here's your receipt, don't hesitate to tell me if you need any-anything else." I placed the piece of paper on the table gently, and as he took it, his hand brushed the top of mine, so I removed it swiftly. My cheeks were burning and I could see that his were turning bright red. It was like we were having a staring contest, and I swore I could get lost in his eyes for hours without even realizing it. His gaze shifted from my eyes, down to my nose and lips and then to the receipt he was holding. "My name is Park Jinyoung, by the way..." He muttered. "Uhm... I don't know why I said that but, yeah..." He took his face between his hands, his elbows leaning on the small round table and looked down. I let out a small giggle, I was sort of relieved that he was nervous also, I mean, that was a good sign, right?

Even when he was completely mortified, Jinyoung was still the most handsome man I had ever laid eyes on.  "You can go to the register when you are ready to pay." I mumbled and left.

An excited Kim was waiting for me in the kitchen. She had witnessed this whole scene and was jumping around everywhere, I swore she was going to break something. She took my two hands in hers while she began dancing; I was just standing still, wondering what the hell was going on with this woman.

"He's soooooo into you!" She spoke melodically, almost like she was singing along to her favorite song. I sighed.

"Come on! You have to ask him on a date!" She was enjoying this too much, but that's what best friends are for, I guess. "Oh and I could tag along with Mark! It could be a double date!" She clapped her hands. Kim and Mark were the cutest couple I knew. They had just gotten engaged a few months ago and I always looked up to them as a model for what I want my future relationship to be like. I swore to myself that I would never waste my time with a guy if my eyes didn't sparkle like Kim and Mark's eyes do when they are around each other. That's what true love is, folks.

"Woah there!" I placed my hands on both her cheeks and gently pressed. "You need to calm down, he just told me his name. It's no big deal!"

"Whatever." Kim gave up and rolled her eyes, her sudden change of attitude caught me off-guard. "Just know you're your own cock-blocker." She pointed her index towards me and shrugged.

I was never the one to make the first move with guys. Even though I'm pretty confident most of the time, I always tend to chicken-out when feelings are involved. You could say self-sabotaging was my speciality.

I greeted new clients, placing them strategically all over the dining room. I was taking the order of a young couple while I noticed Jinyoung waiting at the register. My gaze scanned the place all over, Kim seemed nowhere to be seen so I tried my best to serve the couple as fast as I could in order to attempt to speak to Jinyoung for one last time.

Of course, the universe was totally against this plan. The guy, who was the male version of a Karen, wouldn't stop asking questions, and while I knew it was part of my job to answer him, I was completely annoyed. He kept on asking if the menu was vegan, and even though I told him it was not completely, but that we did in fact have some vegan options, he didn't want to cooperate at all. He only kept on yelling that we were all animal killers and left the restaurant, after insulting me.

I murmured a silent "go fuck yourself" to myself, before making my way to the register, noticing that Jinyoung had left the café already.

Just my fricken’ luck.

It was now the end of my shift, so I punched myself out and threw myself, completely exhausted, on one of the colorful bean bags in the break room. I had to wait for Kim, since she was my ride home. I scrolled on instagram for a couple of minutes when suddenly, a wild Kim appeared in the door frame, with the biggest grin on her face. I struggled to get up and out of the bean bag, my best friend laughing out loud at the view.

"I thought you'd want to have this." She handled me what I thought was a piece of paper.

I unfolded the wrinkly paper, soon realizing it was a receipt. Why exactly was she giving this to me?

"Flip it over and read." She ordered in a joyful manner.

It read:

To Y/N, Here's my number: 82-******* Please text me? I mean you don't have to... But I'd really like if you did? Jinyoung

My eyes grew three times their original size and I felt heat rise up my cheeks. So he was actually flirting with me?

******

Tell me if you guys are interested for part 2 and I will post it maybe in later this week!!! Thank you for reading :)

[mattzerella-sticks]

Jolly Holly, a Buddie fic immediately after the fall finale

With all the mistletoe hanging around, at some point Eddie and Buck had to end up under some. And if it doesn't come to pass, then someone will have to take matters into their own hands.

Will a stolen moment at the Christmas Party lead to something more?

Buck drags him down the fire station’s stairs, Eddie chuckling at the excitement splashed across his face. Their station’s stand-in for a dalmation. If he grew a tail between blinks Eddie bets it would wag fast enough to blow him away. Although not really. The tight grip cutting blood off his blood flow and turning his hand purple needs jaws of life tearing through it for a chance at freedom.

Freedom was overrated in his opinion.

“Where are you taking me?” he asks, feet stuttering in the wake of Buck’s haphazard pulling.

“Don’t worry ‘bout it,” Buck tells him, “...not far.” They turn the corner around the ambulance and Buck slams against the side. Eddie knocks into him, drawing further laughter from them both.

“Okay, okay,” Eddie says, creating space between them with a gentle shove. Hand lingering against Buck’s chest. “I’m here… why?”

Buck sucks his bottom lip under his teeth, glancing away from Eddie. He tries to see what drew the other man’s attention but the ambulance blocks them from view of the entire firehouse. A private corner for only two.

“Well…” he starts without prompt, startling Eddie. “We’ve been here for a few hours now and… you have yet to thank me for planning this whole get-together.”

Eddie rolls his eyes, head lolling to the side and resting against the ambulance’s side. Thunk . “And this is how you want it? In private?”

Shrugging, Buck mirrors his pose. Birthmark pinching with his smile like an adorable kidney bean. “Didn’t want you to embarrass yourself in front of everyone when you fell to your knees in praise.”

“Oh, yeah,” his knees buckle slightly. Eddie sags halfway and widens the already great height difference between them. “Thank you Evan for making this one of the best Christmases I’ve ever experienced on this Earthly plane. For making it so I didn’t miss spending today with my son and ensuring that he won’t grow up hating me and when I’m on my deathbed he’ll be  there with tears in his eyes!” His snickers grew the more he spoke, until Eddie’s vision blurred from squinted eyes. Buck leans forward and laughs through quiet huffs, arms wrapped around his stomach. Eddie’s hand trails down Buck’s chest and latches onto his arm. Limply dangling, holding on with a finger or two.

“Something like that,” Buck says, wiping at his stretched cheeks, “I mean, I didn’t do this all because of you. Nice that you think so, though. Makes me feel better about my big head.”

“No one’s head’ll ever be bigger than yours… Buck .” He lightly scuffs his friend’s chin with his knuckles while he pops the ‘B’.

The bright smile shudders for a beat, sliding into a pout. But like a roller coaster it climbs high and returns to where it was. “So much for gratitude…”

“Gratitude?” he scoffs, “you mean my plaintive thanks wasn’t enough for you?”

“Well… if we’re talking…”

“What? What else could you want?”

Something tickles his forehead. Eddie glances up and finds a sprig of mistletoe waiting. His heart bounces up into his throat and wedges itself tightly, not powerful enough to choke but makes each swallow hurt. “You want a…”

“A kiss,” Buck says, soft like the leaves against his skin, “That’s all.”

“A kiss?”

“Yeah… you can say a lot with a kiss. Figured it’d beat you trying to find the perfect words to thank me with.”

Eddie’s lips thin into a firm line. “How long have you been hiding that?”

Buck brings the mistletoe closer, inspecting it. “Swiped it after our picture… it was hanging over us, then, y’know. Could’ve made you kiss me there. But like I said… didn’t want to embarrass you too much in public.”

His eyes nearly roll off his face. “You’re too much, Buck.”

“You mean you’re not gonna kiss me?”

“You think you deserve it?”

“I mean, a little,” Buck says, other hand showing off its finger and thumb, a scant inch of space separating them. “Coordinating all of this with Athena behind everyone’s backs… working with the group home to get all the kids here… promising Abuela I’d be her date at the next senior potluck if she told me what presents Christopher already had waiting for him so I could buy him a little gift.”

His legs wobble of their own accord, Eddie glad for the ambulance’s support. Reminded of Christopher in this moment, how his face lit up brighter than a Christmas tree’s when Buck revealed the present. “It’s my second favorite thing,” he told them, “after being able to spend the day with my dad…”

Buck dragged Christopher into a hug, finding Eddie easily over his son’s shoulder. The expression on his face so tempting mistletoe would be an excuse but not the reason.

“That,” Eddie says, voice low and gravelly, “that, uh… that was a hefty price to pay.”

“Worth it to see how happy it made him,” he shrugs, “how happy it made you .”

Eddie leaps towards Buck and catches him off guard, the mistletoe bouncing at their feet. His hand cradles Buck’s face, keeps it still so their lips can crash into each other. Buck’s nose tickles Eddie’s cheek. Tiny jolts cascading from the point of contact and spreading through every nerve. He imagines Buck looks shocked, but can’t muster the strength to open his eyes from when they slipped close.

Luckily, when Eddie pulls away, Buck’s remain shut. They flutter open a second later, awe shining like he stole the sun and trapped it in his gaze. Its warmth melts the block of ice his heart became, allowing it to melt to where it belongs. “What…” Buck whispers, “what was that?”

He barks a short laugh. “A kiss. What you wanted.”

“I didn’t think you’d actually go through with it!”

“I’m not one to back down, Buck,” Eddie smirks, slipping two fingers past his collar to curl around his neck, “Are you?”

Buck grins, trembling hands dancing at his sides. “Hell no. C’mere and shower me with more of that gratitude.” “Without mistletoe?”

“We never needed that weed.”

Eddie agrees, Buck’s lips draining the remnants of his will to fight. One taste like shotgunning forty cans of eggnog at once, the rush dizzying. They turn, Eddie pushing off the ambulance and splaying Buck’s back against it. Hands that grazed hips flew upwards. Tugging at his hair and squeezing his bicep. He grins into the kiss, tracing the sharp angles of Buck’s face and following a path lower. Massaging the one part of the other man that’s only curves.

“ Oh ! Oh, I’m sorry -”

They crumble, Eddie tripping over himself in shock. He stares at May, the younger girl frozen by the edge of the ambulance. Her eyes dart from the ground to Eddie to Buck and to the ground again. “May -”

“I, I didn’t mean to intrude,” she says, face heating up, “Mom needed Buck to help with dishes - part of the deal he made with her that he’d clean up if she set up. Denny saw you two come down here, and since Harry was playing with Chris she made me come over and check and - if I had known you two were…”

“Mistletoe!”

Both May and Eddie glance at Buck, the other man burning a shade similar to their firetruck. “What?” she asks.

“We were, we were caught under some mistletoe,” he explains, kicking at the near-forgotten decoration, “And, y’know what happens when two people are under… are under mistletoe…” Buck seizes, hands snapping and pointing in a series of aborted gestures that worries Eddie. Neither respond to his antics, however, and the panicked expression shifts into resignation. “Yeah, I’ll be up their in a moment to clean up.”

“Okay…”

“And May,” Eddie calls to her, attempting a smile, “maybe keep this on the low?”

She sighs, “Sure. I mean… it was mistletoe.”

“‘Atta girl.” He waves goodbye, waiting until May fully disappears to give Buck his full attention. Eddie moves closer to him, approaching cautiously like he would a wounded deer. The other man rubs at his eyes, quietly muttering to himself. “Hey, you okay?”

“Yeah,” Buck tells him, “Just completely mortified at having a teenager catching us acting like -”

“Like teenagers?”

“Yeah…”

His hand hesitates near his shoulder, unsure whether or not he should close the gap. “This,” he starts, sweetness in his mouth sharply decaying into bitterness, “this… you were okay with this, and - and what we -”

“Yes,” Buck cuts him off, throwing his hands off in further panic. Drawing him in with wide eyes. “Of course,” he continues, “I… I liked it. I really like it… But, I’m not sure if I’m ready for the whole team to know -”

Eddie relaxes, squeezing Buck’s shoulder. “They won’t. May’s a good kid, she’ll keep this under wraps until we’re ready.”

“You think?”

“I mean maybe not forever ,” he levels with him, smirking, “Athena’ll probably get a whiff that something’s up and it won’t be long before she figures it out.”

“That sounds like her…”

“So,” Eddie shrugs, thumb rhythmically brushing against his shirt, “maybe tonight… when Christopher’s tuckered out. We can continue where we left off and… sort a few things out. And,” his face hurts from the splitting grin stretching out his lips, “I’ll even let you bring the mistletoe.”

Buck laughs, drifting towards Eddie and ghosting their lips together in imitation of a kiss. Fuels the burning desire inside for more of a taste. “ Perfect ,” he says, spinning around Eddie, “now let’s hurry up. The faster we clean the quicker we can end our shift.”

“We?” Eddie asks, following, “How did I get roped into this?”

“Remember that day when you walked into the 118?”

“Yeah?”

“That’s how!”

Eddie shakes his head at how Buck races away, hopping up the steps. He waits at the bottom. Prefers to wait and let the past few minutes soak into him. Clutches the banister when the memory of Buck’s lips. Buck calls for him. “I’m coming, I’m coming!”

Of course Eddie will help Buck. It’s the foundation of their relationship, and of who they are as people. Together they can overcome everything, including a sink full of messy dishes.

Especially when it’s the only thing keeping them from each other. The last thing.

Finally.

“Merry Christmas, Buck,” Eddie says, elbow deep in suds, fingers pruning.

Buck smiles, scans the room before blowing a soft kiss Eddie’s way. “Merry Christmas.”

[coe-lilium]

TroS reaction (1st view)

Necessary premise in bullet points:

- I liked TFA when it came out and still do but as I dug into the franchise/canon (Disney only by choice) my enjoyment of it became more lukewarm. Came out of it dreading a potential Reylo but liking the two charas on their own. 

- went into TLJ worried I’d hate it, came out with it being my favorite saga movie and sold on the Rey-Ren connection, whatever road it would’ve taken. Loved the “Rey’s powerful on her own/bc the Force wants to set Kylo’s wrongs right”. It felt good after two years of being bombarded with “this fucking Mary Sue can have any power only if she’s connected to powerful men of the saga, she has otherwise no right in being powerful” in forums spaces.    

- went into TroS non-spoiled, wary of Palpatine return but relatively hopeful if soured about the “JJ our lord and saviour pleease save us from evil evil Jonhson” (HA!). The rumors about lore from the tv series being featured into the movie had me excited.  

That said, here goes: [SPOILERS FOR THE ENTIRE MOVIE, ENDING INCLUDED, RIGHT OFF THE BAT]

I didn’t like it. I really hope to warm up to it more in future views, there’s absolutely stuff I liked or even loved, but as it stands now it was overall a massive disappointment on many sides and -worst of all- threatens to retroactively ruin my enjoyment in other previous stories. 

First, the positives: 

- Parentage notwithstanding, Rey was good. Her rage, her fears, her good heart, her commitment to the fight and the training, her longing for guidance… truly, if the bloodline revelation hadn’t retroactively ruined my investment in the character and themes I’d have fully, 100% loved her even if every single other part of the movie had been the same. 

Except for a brief war flashback to Starkiller game abilities (I lolled) I wasn’t even troubled by all the new abilities or their scope. Movies’ been inventing new powers since the beginning and the Force does what the Force wants. Again, fuck the genetics “twist”, garbage stuff. 

- Kylo, next to… 95% that involved him? TLJ did a great job selling him to me and surprisingly this movie added to that instead of retconning it away. More competent but still stupid and petty from time to time. I’m glad he came back, glad he choose right and glad he was allowed more time on the right side than Anakin. I love redemptions and he was portrayed as wavering the entire trilogy, I don’t even really care that it could’ve done better. I’m happy for him and his family, that’s all. The kiss got a laugh out me but not a malicious one, I was kind of running out of reasonable reactions by then. 

I’m just conflicted on how I feel about his death. Back when TFA was released I wanted him to survive to face what Anakin didn’t: justice (the kid-friendly setting prevented a death sentence anyway), atonement and growth from there, I still wish it happened and maintain that a different pacing would’ve allowed it. On the other hand, I’m also kinda okay with him dying. He righted at least a bit of his many wrongs, he saved a person he cared for, that his parents cared for and that could help the galaxy much more than he ever could and he was at peace. It was a good death.      

- Kylo’s vision/illusion of Han. A surprise but a very pleasant, well acted one. Would’ve I maybe liked Anakin more, as Ben idolized him so much and for all the wrong reasons and because I love that disaster? Yes. Does Han work much better in the economy of the movie and trilogy story and do he and Ben have a much rawer relationship and history? Absolutely. I am a teeny tiny bit baffled as  for why Luke didn’t also show up, but the actual scene was good enough I forgive it.  

- Rey and Kylo bond and connection was one of the saving graces of this mess and I utterly loved it. Both actors worked their asses for for all their scenes and it payed off, oh if it payed off. Their DSII duel was perhaps a tad long but great nonetheless (Republic era Jedi jumps!), the hurt and the sense of absolute loss and grief they both conveyed -and shared!- after Leia’s passing was incredible, Rey regretting the near kill and softly going “I would have stayed, had you renounced the dark side”. She cared, yes, but not to the point of ignoring the horrors (something Anakin never quite understood). The “dyad” stuff was a bit overkill, just call it a force bond, we can see it’s freaking powerful, but the Force Skype and sharing of objects that came with the package, that I loved. Surprise lightsaber, Ren fuckers! :D Bet Anakin and Obi Wan were really jealous, that would’ve come in handy during the war.       

- Finn was now fully invested in the cause, at ease, visibly happy to be with his friends, ready to bond and reach out, quick to plan, to act and to adapt to the situation, brave but cautious and calculating. I wish it was given a bit more focus, but I loved he found other young FO defectors. Also fuck yeah, he’s force sensitive and his ability is used, not just thrown in as a useless wink. Jedi Finn in future material, c’mon!

- Poe’s also grown. He was probably going to have more screen time with Leia had Carrie not died but there was nothing to be done for that. I’m not as happy as for previous 3 charas for the backstory retcon I’ll tackle in the negatives.

- Jannah was cool, the addiction of other FO defectors a welcomed one and the scene were she and Finn excitedly went over their “I broke free” moment was adorable. Good bean, I’d read more about her and her company. 

- A bit lot annoyed at Bloodline being kinda tossed outta the window but getting Leia with lightsaber was nice. Give me some ancillary material to deal with the clash and I’ll fully forgive it. 

- Jedi! MY GIRL AHSOKA MY MAN KANAN! I mean, I sure wish they were in a better movie, but hey, recognition for something more than the OT? No slandering of the Order but all of them collectively kicking Sidious ass once and for all? I’ll gladly take it. Anakin, my dude, I’m sorry your sacrifice was next to nullified but it was good to hear you again ;_;  I didn’t hear Ezra’s voice anywhere so I can still hope he’s alive, well and with the Ascendancy teaching all their Navigators. “I am all the Jedi” remains a terrible line. 

And now, oh boi. Here comes the long list of annoying - bad - stinking shit stuff: 

- If I wanted to watch a 2 and half long videogame cutscenes I’d have done that in the comfort of my home without spending money for tickets. Go to level x to retrieve related macguffin, move to next level to get next macguffin and so on and so on. I liked close to everything in the DS II sequences, but what would’ve that dagger pointed at if the wreckage had fallen even a little bit differently?   

In general, many plot points gave me the feeling they were stolen from the tv series and badly executed, like a mockery (or incompetence?). Case in point: Hux betraying the 1st Order out of personal, spiteful hate? Potentially good! The execution? A poor man’s Rebels Agent Kallus, already over in little more than 5minutes. 

- Palpatine himself is a poorly, ridiculously poorly executed Maul resurrection storyline from tcw and rebels. 

Because Maul was 1. explained and 2. got a good, long arc that made you forgive the undoubtably contrived ass-pull it took to bring him back while Sidious is just… there. You gotta accept it because the writer said so. 

How did he survive? We don’t know and fuck you if you expect an explanation (they really had the absolute galls to have him say the iconic/meme line from Rots and apparently it was supposed to be enough?!) How could he “have all Sith reside inside me” when canon’s clear that Sith do-not-get-to-retain-their-individuality-in-the-Force, do not work well together (lmao) and he as an individual never gave a shit about the Sith except when they could serve his own personal desires? His entire approach to the rule of two and other Sith stuff is “fuck that noise, everything in the galaxy exist to serve me”. He’s fine dying as long as “the Sith rule”? Who IS this character, because he’s not Darth Sidious (as presented in Disney’s own canon, mind). Oh, you wanted explanations? FUCK YOU, screams the movie. 

The mess gets somehow salvaged in the end as he comes to his senses and siphon the life out of Rey and Ben to de-rotten/revive himself to rule in person, now *that* was in character. Was he actually lying his ass off the entire time waiting for the moment he could siphon them? Hopefully but who the hell even knows.

In the end it just wasn’t worth bring him back. A holocron, a different Sith, even a hive-mind of old records/tainted wraiths of Sith (perhaps wearing Palps face to buy the old empire aficionados loyalty, idk) would’ve been better than “actually, Anakin suffered nearly his entire life and sacrificed himself for barely more than 25 years of peace and it still wasn’t enough to rid the galaxy of the monster who destroyed his and countless other lives”. But Johnson was the one shitting on beloved characters legacy and accomplishments, uh? Surely at least he’s got company. 

Ian was clearly having a blast, so there was… that? And the initial sequence being legit creepy and the Sith storm or whatever the fuck was that. That can stay, it was cool.     

- Poe, the latino character, got retconned from former Republic pilot (a backstory established before TFA came out and faithfully respected ever since) into a smuggler and gang member. Classy. What does Lucaslfilm have a story group for if not for stopping stuff like this from happening? Bonus Zorii being used for a “no homo! homo? no homo?” wink wink and for generally being a poor man Solo’s Qi’ra.   

- The movie makes you worry for a character death three (3) times in a row only to immediately backpedal on it. The survivors are grieving, the scene is sober… and then suddenly! they’re alive! isn’t it wonderful? let’s insert a comical scene now that we’re at it! Sigh.   

- The whole Threepio stuff was a contrived waste of time in a movie already full of more relevant plot treads that could’ve put that screen time to better use. 

- Rey’s parents apparently aren’t assholes anymore bc they sold her into slavery to protect her from Sidious, which is… supposed to make it alright, a sacrifice in the name of love? If they had been shown trying to give her to a trusted person and then she was kidnapped that wouldn’t had been their fault, just unfortunate, but the movie shows them leaving their 5yo daughter with her in-all-but-name slaver so?? 

- Rey Palpatine… Rey. Palpatine. Gesù Cristo benedetto che minchia mi è toccato di vedere. That hurt. That was so hilariously over the top bad I just…I started laughing. On top of the entire thing, thank you so, soo much for validating all those fucking assholes who demanded Rey be connected to a powerful man in the saga to accept her powers and value, you hack. Jedi were never about power of blood and then you went and reinforced the very opposite. She ain’t powerful bc the Force recognized her as worthy to stop evil and chose to aid her anymore, she’s powerful bc grandfather was. Lovely stuff. Hilariously, now she has a lot more legit “Mary Sue” traits than before. 

- Rose’s sidelining was a blatant bow to her and her actress haters whims. If in VIII she jumped at the chance of action, now she was fearful and “had to stay behind” studying maps. Fuck that noise. 

- Even if she rejected it, underline is that the Skywalker line is wiped out and the Palpatine one thrives. I… just… wtf wtf wtf. A final “Just Rey” would’ve been more powerful -because now it would’ve been reclaimed- and less corny and in poor taste than a Palpatine taking on the Skywalker name. I’m not sure if Sidious is more offended or if he’s laughing his ass off in space!hell. Probably the 2nd. Bad.      

- The final scene on Tatooine. It rang so empty because the planet brings warm memories only to the audience, not the characters. In-universe, that place brought nothing but misery to the Skywalkers: Anakin and Shmi were brought there as slaves and lived as such for years, Shmi was tortured to death and Anakin began his descent into the dark for crying out loud. Luke had to hide and saw his relatives murdered. Leia had no connection whatsoever to the place. The mera idea of burying Anakin Skywalker lightsaber into the sands of Tatooine and considering it a way of paying respect is… I don’t know, hilariously in bad taste? Rey, dear, what did you have personally against the guy? Put those sabers to rest on Naboo! Ah, but we can’t truly acknowledge the PT now, can we? Wack.   

- It’s not TroS complete fault, that “honor” mostly sit at TFA’s feet but for all its omages, copies and almost slavish references, from a in-universe point of view it’s like the OT barely occurred. 

The same evil man has been defeated (until next time?), the Republic must be rebuilt from scratch, a evil military is all over the place and must be dealt with, the Jedi Order has to be rebuilt… it’s depressing. A new evil taking advantage of the empire leftovers would’ve been one thing, but Sidious? He’s been effectively winning nonstop ever since he was elected Chancellor. He had all the power, all the influence, all the control and he maintained it all even as a rotten corpse in exile, the entire galaxy marching on his tune, controlled by his strings. And as the cherry on top of the cake he even managed to wipe out the family that could’ve, should have been his undoing! He effectively destroyed the Skywalkers. He outlived every Jedi, every survivor, every clone. I hate this. It’s sickening. I can’t even be happy Rex was on Endor anymore.      

In general, the best word I can find for this movie is: coward. 

So blatantly desperate to please, to be “forgiven”, to reference every single irrelevant thing -except the PT and the TV series in a intelligent way-, to throw fanservice after fanservice after fanservice no matter how nonsensical from all over that crossed the “corny” to wander into embarrassing territory many times over (Maz giving Chewie a medal outta nowhere? Come the fuck on now). 

The cartoon series had twenty time the guts of this movie and I vehemently wish for Filoni to take the helm of the entire creative team in a very near future.                  

[dinneratgrannys]

I'm probably in the minority of favorite shipping, but I just don't see the chemistry between Hook and Emma. And there's a part of me that is having a hard time seeing how people can love this couple more than Snow & Charming or even Regina & Robin. Is anyone interested in enlightening me on this heated debate?

i like pretty much every couple on the show, but for different reasons. snow & charming is just The Iconic Couple for me, and it certainly helps their on-screen chemistry that they (clearly) have off-screen chemistry too. for me, i don’t necessarily think cs > snowing, but i enjoy cs more than i do snowing for a few reasons.

i like the idea that they both make each other want to be better people. for emma, it’s about breaking down her walls and opening up more. not just opening up to killian either, but to everyone - her parents, her friends, henry, regina, etc. emma starts as someone who has trouble dealing with/talking about her feelings, and from someone who has difficulty trusting others, which is something i can definitely relate to. through her experiences/relationship with killian, she’s able to learn to trust - not everyone is going to leave her, not everyone is going to hurt her.

for killian, it’s about making amends for the things he’s done, and moving on from his past. at first, his redemption arc is definitely all about emma. he wants to be better so he can deserve her. but that changes as the seasons go on. i notice him being a better person, even in situations where emma isn’t there/won’t find out about it. one of these moments for me is in s6 when he offers up a spare room on the jolly roger to belle, and apologizes for the times when he used her to hurt rumple. his effort to be a better man might have started as a way to win emma over, but this is a situation that has nothing to do with her, and he’s still trying to make amends for the things he’s done.

i’m also an absolute sucker for ships where the female is the Strong Heroic Warrior Woman and the male is a Rough Around the Edges Guy who looks at the woman like she is the absolute world - because she is! killian respects her strength, admires her magic, and doesn’t try to force her to be someone she isn’t. he gives her space when she needs it. he lets her come to him when she’s ready to talk about things that have been bothering her. he acknowledges that henry will always be priority #1, and tries to bond with henry on his own to show emma that he wants to be part of her life and is in it for the long haul.

i also adore the captain charming dynamic, which wouldn’t be half as funny if charming wasn’t killian’s father-in-law. it’s hilarious to watch precious bean charming try to do the tough-guy act for his daughter’s boyfriend.

personally, i do see a lot of chemistry between the two of them in the tiny intimacies they share. like in 4.01 when he’s waiting for her by the library with a cup of coffee and they share a tiny little kiss. or in 6.07 when he’s giving her a pep talk and kisses her hand. or in 6.03 when she’s having the tremors and he pulls her close to comfort her.

and honestly, the moment that sold it for me was in 3.22 when she asks him about how he found her in new york once the curse hit. he kept that damn secret for the entire arc, even when they started to doubt they could trust him! he could’ve told her right off the bat in new york “i gave up the jolly roger so i could be here for you” but he didn’t. she literally has to pry it out of him, before he sort of sheepishly admits “why, the jolly roger of course.” and when i saw the look on emma’s face when she asks “you traded your ship for me?” i knew i found a new ship.

at the end of the day, we all take different things out of the shows we watch, and that’s what’s so great about fandom - we can all share our experiences and bring our different points of view! not everyone who watches the show is going to like captain swan or outlaw queen or even snowing. i think we all look for the relationships that we can relate to. and that’s why i love captain swan - they aren’t this story-book perfect romance like snowing, just two people trying their best and making each other better people along the way.

thanks for the ask! :)

[katwriting]

Fic: Sound of your Heart

celebrity AU // chapter 1

When Magnus Bane returns to his favorite coffee shop after weeks of being out of town, he doesn't expect that place to be more packed than usual. He also doesn't expect sharing a table with a stranger and actually having a good time. And most importantly, he doesn't expect that stranger to be surprisingly funny, interesting and kind. But if Magnus learned one thing over the years, it's that life doesn't exactly ask for your opinion.

Word count: 2.7k | Read on AO3 (or continue reading below)

“Thank you, New York City! You guys were amazing, goodnight!”

Turning his back to the roaring crowd, Magnus walked off the stage, pulling out his earpiece as he walked down the steps. Someone handed him a bottle of water, which he gulped down in a matter of seconds before wiping a towel over his sweat drenched face.

Another show done. The first of two at Madison Square Garden, both sold out. And the second-to-last one before his well-deserved break. As Magnus walked through the backstage hallways back to his wardrobe, past posters that of upcoming concerts at this venue and several ones that announced his own two New York shows, he shook his head and couldn’t suppress a smile. Sometimes he still couldn’t believe how fast things had progressed ever since that fateful day about two years ago. How his career had basically sky-rocketed from working as a barista at a café and singing at weddings or company holiday parties to selling out Madison Square Garden two nights in a row.

The two reasons for that unreal twist in his life were already waiting in his dressing room when he got back. Magnus barely had the chance to drop his towel into the hamper in the corner when he was already enveloped in a warm, familiar hug and a kiss was dropped on his cheek, despite his sweaty, slightly disheveled state.

“Magnus Bane, rock star. Look at you,” Catarina said when she let go of him, still holding him at arm’s length and beaming. “Your mother would be so proud.”

Magnus smiled at her and tried to swallow past the lump in his throat. Instead, he looked at the second person that had been waiting in the dressing room, who was just getting up from the chair he’d made himself comfortable in. “And what’s your verdict, Ragnor?”

“The show was sold out, the crowd adored you as usual and I’m pretty sure the press will as well,” Ragnor replied, his British accent as heavy as ever. He shrugged and slipped his phone into his back pocket. “I suppose you did alright.”

Magnus grinned and then only too happily accepted a hug from Ragnor as well. As disinterested the reply may have sounded, it was hard to ignore the pride in Ragnor's eyes as he looked at Magnus, trying his best to remain as unfazed as possible.

Ragnor Fell and Catarina Loss were a married couple of almost ten years and had been ruling the New York music business for just as long. Their record company, Downworld Records, had the most popular artists of the city signed; every time Magnus attempted to count the Grammies, Oscars and Golden Globes those artists had won in total, he ended up with a headache.

Magnus would have never dreamed of getting to know them, let alone signing for their label. But ever since he had, things in his life had taken a U-Turn in the best possible way. With the help of those two heavyweights in the music business he had soon turned from flamboyant, outgoing barista-turned-singer to record-breaking superstar and taken the music world by storm. Magnus couldn't possibly more grateful for their help and support over the years.  

With a sigh, Magnus dropped on the couch that Ragnor had just stood up from, grabbing another bottle of water. “So, now that we have the business talk covered, let’s get to the essential stuff,” he said, then took another sip of water. “How’s Chairman?”

Apart from being the most amazing managers that Magnus could have ever dreamed of, Ragnor and Catarina also came with another pretty useful feature: Whenever Magnus went abroad, they took care of his one and only child, a tabby cat called Chairman Meow. When Magnus went on tour or had promo appointments left and right, he left Chairman with the two of them, knowing that he would get his darling kitty back happy and well (and likely a little more overweight than usual).

When he’d taken Chairman to his usual check-up after his world tour last year, the vet hat told him to feed Chairman less, which Magnus had just internally scoffed at. No pet of his would ever be overweight, Chairman was just a little…small for his weight, but fabulously so.

“Oh, he’s great,” Catarina retorted. “Last week when I wasn’t looking, he ate half of the tuna that I wanted to make for dinner.” “- and threw up all over our living room carpet half an hour later,” Ragnor threw in.

Magnus snorted. “Sounds like my son.”

Ragnor rolled his eyes, but smirked. “Damn right he is. That cat is just as extra as you are.”

Magnus just shrugged, getting up again and heading towards the showers. “What can I say, I raised him well.”

+++

Two days later, after sleeping for 12 hours straight and spending an hour in the bathroom to make sure that he didn’t totally like a zombie, Magnus set foot in his favorite place in the world besides the balcony in Catarina’s apartment: Pandemonium, the café he’d worked at before his music career had taken off. The tiny café was wedged in between a Chinese restaurant and a thrift store and there were maybe twenty tables but still, Magnus loved going there. He’d spent many hours there – working, writing songs, trying to make decisions, or simply taking a break from real life. Besides, the place sold the best coffee in Brooklyn, if not even entire New York. And since it was so tiny and kind of an insider tip, he didn’t risk running into fans, reporters or other people who could recognize him there.

Magnus hadn’t been to Pandemonium for a few months now as he had been on tour, but as soon as he stepped through the narrow door and into the cozy atmosphere, he felt himself relax. The off-white brick walls, the many different chairs and couches, none like the other, the scent of freshly roasted coffee beans and the music playing in the background never failed to make him feel like home.

What did, however, very much disturb that feeling of coming home was his first look around the room. More importantly, the realization that the entire place was packed with people. There were young parents trying their best to keep their kids from spilling their coffee, business people typing away on their laptops, their drinks all but forgotten – and then what seemed like a hoard of college kids, taking up the rest of the room.  

Magnus sighed. As much as he loved this place for its cozy atmosphere, the limited number of tables and seats did pose as a problem whenever he came here on a particularly busy day.

Nevertheless, he headed for the counter and ordered his coffee to go, already halfway expecting he would have to drink it on the go somewhere. Or alternatively in his own living room under the skeptical gaze that the Chairman seemed to reserve for whenever Magnus went out and didn’t come back with food or at least a treat for his cat.

Thankfully, at least the line at the counter wasn’t all that long so it didn’t take much time for the baristas to make his drink. Paper cup in hand, Magnus turned away from the cash desk, stuffed his wallet back into the inside pocket of his jacket and then scanned the room one more time, hoping against hope that the few minutes he had spent waiting for his coffee would have been enough for an empty table to appear somewhere – or at least one of the several college kids to realize that the Wi-Fi in this place was crappy for a reason and leave. And indeed, just as he scanned the room one last time, a couple who had been sitting at a tiny table in the far corner across the room rose from their seats, took their empty cups and turned to leave.

Bingo.

With quick, resolute steps Magnus navigated his way through the maze of furniture, laptop chargers, messenger bags and brief cases on the floor towards the now empty table and managed to snatch a seat, effectively cutting off two women’s way who had been walking towards the same table. With an (entirely fake) apologetic smile he sat down on one of the chairs and placed his cup on the table, then grabbed the magazine he had been carrying with him and tried to blend out the noise around him.

It worked surprisingly well for a while, despite the buzzing noise around him. He was halfway through a quite interesting piece about an up and coming local fashion designer, when a voice dragged his attention away and back to the real world.

“Excuse me?”

Suppressing a defeated sigh, Magnus put his magazine aside and looked up, already expecting to be met with the expectant and excited face of one of someone who had recognized him and was about to ask for a photo or an autograph. Instead, he looked into hazel eyes, hidden behind thinly framed glasses. They belonged to a guy that seemed to be in his twenties, maybe a few years younger than Magnus. He was wearing dark blue jeans and a white t-shirt underneath a well-worn leather jacket and had a dark brown messenger back slung across his shoulder.

“Can I sit here?” the stranger said, looking around as if he was checking if an empty seat had appeared somewhere, but then shrugged.

"Uh…sure,” Magnus replied, a little taken aback. He uncrossed his legs so the stranger would have some space and took his magazine off the table, making room for his new seat neighbor’s coffee.

The stranger took a seat and placed his mug on the tiny table between them. “I’m sorry, I wouldn’t normally do this. But this was literally the only free seat so…"

He shrugged, as if it the entire issue explained itself, and put his messenger bag down on the floor.

“It’s no problem. Actually, I haven't been here in a while. When did this place become so crowded? This used to be an insider tip," Magnus pondered and let his gaze roam through the room once more. Now that the guy sitting across from him had taken up the last empty seat, there was literally no space left.

Alec followed his gaze, then shrugged. “Honestly, I have no idea. I come here every few weeks when I'm in the neighborhood, and I didn't notice anything changing. I guess at some point some of those hipster college kids must have discovered the place and made it their most recent Instagram-worthy coffee place or something."

Magnus huffed out a laugh. From the looks of it, those hipster college kids must have told a bunch of their friends too. “Must have been something like that. Last time I was here, there was maybe one seat taken, not just one empty."

“I know, right?", Alec huffed. "I mean, I’m sure they’re all great kids, but the point of me coming to this particular place was so I can enjoy my lunch break in peace. Not in the company of seventeen thousand undergrads,” the stranger grumbled, packing his laptop back into his bag and pulling out a notebook instead.

This time, Magnus genuinely laughed. “I’ll drink to that.”  He picked up his cup and jokingly raised it in his neighbor's direction. He took a sip and then placed the cup on the table again. “I’m Magnus, by the way,” he added, holding out his hand a little awkwardly as the stranger was currently focused on a folder he had taken out of his bag.  

Clearly startled, the guy looked up from his notes. “Huh? Oh…yeah, hi. I’m Alec,” he said, quickly taking Magnus’ hand and shaking it, almost knocking over his coffee in the process.

Magnus smirked. “Nice to meet you, Alec.”

He was just about to ask Alec what job he was working that his lunch break had led him to a tiny coffee place in Brooklyn, when a woman who had been sitting a few tables over got up and left. Alec picked up on that, watched her leave and then turned back towards Magnus, frowning.

"I should probably…you know," Alec said, gesturing towards the now unoccupied table across the room.

“Oh, don’t bother. I could use some company.”

A surprised smirk ran over Alec's features. "Okay."

Over the course of the next half hour or so, Magnus learned that breaking with his habits from time to time wasn't that bad of an idea. Alec turned out to be quite decent company. He was more on the introverted side, a lot more reserved than Magnus, that much Magnus could tell. But when he did say something, it was either funny, smart beyond his ears or sarcastic to a T. From crowded coffee shops and the general unpleasantness of undergrad students their conversation soon moved on to more personal topics. Magnus learned that Alec worked in his parents’ publishing company and was being groomed to take over as CEO one day, which he described as rewarding but also quite challenging from time to time. Magnus, in return, told him some of the stories he always told people when they asked him to tell them a little about himself – how he’d always been fascinated by music, how Queen had been his favorite band when he was a kid and Freddie Mercury still was one of his biggest idols, whether it came to music or life in general.  

Lucky for Magnus, their conversation always shifted to a different topic before they could get to what he did for a living. That was, until Alec straightforward asked.

“You said you like music a lot. Do you work in music as well?”

Internally, Magnus let out a bunch of curses, most of which Catarina would have murdered him for in cold blood if he ever used them in public. Externally, he resolved to something a little less scandal-inducing. Smirking to cover up the shock on his face, he took a sip from his coffee which was barely more than lukewarm at that point but perfectly served as a measure to buy him some time. Time that he used to think and come up with a perfectly fine explanation.

“I do, actually,” he said, “I work for a record label here in New York. It's called Downworld Records."

Technically, that wasn’t even a lie – he did have a contract with Cat and Ragnor's label after all. Besides, not telling strangers everything about himself right away was not lying, right? It was just being responsible, thank you very much. However, considering Alec’s reaction, Magnus might as well have told him the whole truth straight away.

Alec nodded, but other than that seemed pretty unfazed by Magnus’ reply. “Never heard of it. But I don’t really listen to a lot of music and at work we focus on books, so I guess that’s no surprise.”

Magnus blinked. “You don’t?”

Alec shook his head and grabbed his own mug. “Not really. I mean, I do like instrumental pieces or some classic rock if the mood strikes. But other than that, I guess I prefer books to records.”

Magnus smirked and relaxed back into his seat. “Instrumental stuff and classic rock, huh? Well aren’t you something else, Alec.”

Their conversation then shifted to less potentially cover-blowing topics for Magnus. They kept on talking for another while, until Magnus excused himself to the bathroom. When he returned, ready to hear more about that hilarious story of Alec's siblings, he startled, then did a double take just to be sure he hadn't walked to the wrong table. But he hadn't – Alec was no longer there.  Alec's jacket and bag were gone and their table abandoned, save for a slip of paper tucked under the half-finished cappuccino Magnus had gotten only a few minutes ago. When Magnus picked up the little note, he found just a few words scribbled onto it in a barely readable handwriting.

Emergency call, had to run. Was good chatting with you, I really enjoyed having some company. A.

Magnus turned the sheet around, feeling a little disappointed when he found it empty. He sighed. “Me too, Alec. What a shame that you didn’t leave me your number.”

Smirking, he put the sheet into his bag, then picked up his stuff and headed towards the exit. The little break at the café had been undoubtedly fun, but now he had a cat to get home to.

[jui-imouto-chan]

Wanted to write some fluff for my dear @manadrite / @manatheauthor, who was a bit down earlier. 

Thanks to @isumi828 for supplying me with some ideas!

The aroma of brewed coffee beans and the syrupy sweet scent of pastries flutter about, wafting through the air and into the noses of the patrons leisurely sipping from their warm mugs, eyes bright and and posture contented.

Forks glimmer in the soft light of sun, tiny clinks following the contact of the tips of the prongs with the small white plates below speared pieces of dessert.

A bell’s tinkle sounds from the door, a swirl of icy breeze immediately quelled by the warmth of the cafe.

“Welcome!” greets the employee behind the counter, eyes and hair mocha as the coffee he prepares. A smile can be heard in his voice, his back to the majority of the room, but clearly he knows who’s entered the building, as his hands work the machine to prepare a drink before he’s told, no one else in the queue.

He spins on the balls of one foot and smoothly transitions into bending over and sliding out a tray of pastries from the display case beneath the counter, picking a slice of raspberry cheesecake to place on a plate he collects from a shining stack nearby.

He sets a fork atop the empty space beside the desert and swipes the plate into his left hand, his other hand grabbing the handle of a mug, now filled with a cappuccino. He seems to have made a heart design in it, and upon the image becoming visible to the customers in the cafe, giggles and teasing smiles arise.

“You need a hand with that?” the man who’d entered the cafe asks the employee, adjusting his bag’s strap to free his hands and immediately moving to take the items from him.

The employee spins gracefully out of reach, grinning smugly at the mocha-skinned man sighing at him, his apron fluttering. It’s impressive, how not a drop of drink spills over the edge of the mug, despite the dangerous slosh of the scalding liquid. 

His name-tag glints in the sunlight he steps past, a brief illumination of his, admittedly already quite bright countenance.

He sets the plate and mug down with barely a sound, bending at the waist with deliberation. 

Once more, he twirls about on his heel like a misinformed ballerina and in that single movement undoes the bow tied at the small of his back, the apron hanging off of him, now.

“Just a moment.” He says, polite as ever. He usually sounds genially chipper, but now his voice has the adoring undertone of delight.

The mocha-skinned man settles in the cushy booth seat he always sits in, hand curling around the mug with familiarity that is not unusual for the regulars of the cafe. A smile pulls at his lips, freckled cheeks shifting with the uneven expression.

He doesn’t take a sip at any point, an observer would note, and his eyes remain in the distance, past the window he’s beside, where icicles hang precariously over the edges of roofs and gutters and drip arrhythmically, into thick bunches of snow gathered at the corners of sidewalks and roadways. One such corner has a toddler-sized disgruntled snowman sporting a tiny foil fedora.

“I’m waiting on Eli to make my hot cocoa, so I can spare a few moments for you.” the employee, sans his apron, slides into the opposite booth, his arms lain over the tabletop casually.

The tan man gasps exaggeratedly, shoulders rising as a hand moves to hover near his mouth, lush green and soothing blue wide in mock-surprise. “I honestly can’t believe that the Connor Anderson would grant me the privilege of moments of interaction! My poor heart feels blessed; I can die without regrets.”

Connor appears incredibly bemused, though his cheek twitches as he bites back laughter. He tilts his head into a palm, resting on an elbow while his fingers idly drum a vaguely familiar tune.

“Alright Drama Queen--”

“Excuse you, I prefer King of Theatrics.”

“Oh, whatever. I give up on you.” Connor’s eyes roll, but he’s finally let his lips tick up until his eyes crinkle, huffing air out through his nose.

“Aw, man, I guess North wins that bet.” 

“Bet?” 

“She said that you’d leave my sorry ass in less than 2 minutes.”

Connor allows a soft chuckle out and shakes his head. He moves out of the seat when there’s a call of his name. “What was your side?”

“That it’d take 3 minutes.”

And then Connor closes his eyes as a surprised snort takes over, his shoulders shaking in barely-contained laughter. “You’re ridiculous.”

“I’m lovable.”

“That, too.”

And the tan man’s eyes blink rapidly, clearly not having anticipated that response. A hint of red creeps up his cheeks, and Connor smirks to himself as he collects his hot cocoa and nabs a small, pink cupcake.

Only after Connor sits back in front of him does the darker man move to slice a chunk off of his raspberry cheesecake. In lieu of bringing the bit to his mouth, he directs it to Connor’s, bumping against soft pink and leaving a small dot of hibiscus-colored-syrup. Connor’s taken off guard for a moment, but his lips eventually part to allow the dessert in, closing over the fork to drag the piece off, lashes batting in an effort to physically express the bliss he’d gotten from the taste. 

The fork still hovers near his mouth, heterochromatic eyes watching his reaction raptly, and he takes his chance to snatch the utensil out of the other’s grip. He swallows and cuts another piece off of the very cake he’d tasted, spearing it.

“You’ve got to give it a try, Markus.”

Markus obligingly opens his mouth when Connor mimics his earlier actions and feeds him, savoring the taste of the sweet.

He hums in appreciation. “Good pick.” 

“But of course. Only the best for you.”

His line is undercut by the teasing lilt to his voice, but Markus forgives him for that only because another slice is brought to his mouth, which he chases down with a sip of his cappuccino.

“Once again, I’m honored.”

Markus reacquires his silverware with ease and pointedly stares at the hot chocolate near Connor’s elbow, still steaming but thankfully much cooler than the piping hot chocolate-lava that Connor would insist on drinking immediately. Markus has spent plenty of time locking mouths with Connor after filling his with cold water, only for the purpose of aiding him in dealing with the consequences of his stubborn habits. 

Well, okay, not only for that, but the other reasons are to be considered added benefits to his good deeds.

Connor and Markus lapse into an amicable silence, their free left hands creeping across the tabletop, until Markus’ rests atop Connor’s, thumb stroking over the back of his hand.

They almost don’t appear to notice the contact, perhaps from how naturally such actions of affection come to them.

“Am I keeping you?” Markus asks, his mug clicking as he sets it down.

Connor blinks, then shakes his head. “No, no. Eli’s got me covered, and it’s a little slow right now. I think you guys are stealing our business for today.”

Markus can’t help the smug grin crawling up his face. “If only we could steal one of the employees, here, too.”

“I’d rather French Sumo than join you heathens.”

“I’m hurt, really, I am. I’m also going to go legally change my name to Sumo Manfred.” Markus’ fingers dance up Connor’s arm and then move back down so he can intertwine them with Connor’s.

“Oh? Such drastic measures, when all you’d have to do is ask and receive.”

Markus finger’s jump, and Connor gives him a squeeze the same time he sends over his favorite methods of stopping Markus’ thought processes and heart at once: a cheeky, mischievous wink.

Markus groans, dropping his fork to shield his face and cover his eyes. “Oh my god, stop. You know I have a weakness for that. --In Josh’s words, ‘you put the wink in twink’.”

Connor scoffs, affronted, but not really. “Josh can catch these hands.”

“Your twinkie-fingered hands.” Markus sing-songs, wriggling his digits.

Connor’s hand tightens over his, painfully squeezing with his lithe ‘twinkie-fingers’. “I will end you.”

“You love me too much.”

A frustrated sigh, and then, “Ugh, why do you have to be right?” Connor shoots Markus a glare when the taller laughs at him, though his scowl may well be a pout, in Markus’ book, with all the effect it has.

“Aw, it’s okay that you have twink hands, babe. There’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

Connor stands, collecting their dirtied plates and mugs with a huff. “Yeah? Well, you’ve got big, meaty, claws.”

“You did not just--”

“Oh, but I did.”

There’s a vindictive satisfaction that takes over Connor’s face as Markus growls.

Markus moves to follow him out of the booth, his messenger bag all but forgotten on the seat, and Connor dances out of the way of his searching hands with all the grace he can muster. Can’t let Markus get too handsy in his workplace, now can he?

He places them on the back counter to take them to the sink, later, about to address Markus’ sulky frown, but the bell’s jingle and a momentary brush of cold air makes Connor snap his attention to the potential customer entering the cafe, cheery disposition coming forth.

“Welcome, how may I--North?”

“Oh, shit, North?!”

Markus makes to hide behind Connor, but, thanks to the factors that are too numerous to list, he’s spotted and approached with a frighteningly calm and blank expression.

“You’re supposed to be working right now. I’ve got Alice taking orders at this point, the fuck are you doing?”

She swipes her hand to Markus’ ear to pinch it between her thumb and fingers and drags him out of the cafe, giving him an earful. Connor laughs nervously, waving to his boyfriend as he goes and watching Markus feebly attempt to return the action and receive a swift smack to the back of the head, the spike of fear that had shot up Connor’s spine upon North’s arrival thankfully dissipating.

He’s only just turned to the back counter when the door slams open, the bell a cry of alarm, and footsteps advance on him rapidly. 

Connor’s arm is grabbed and he’s spun around and dipped, and then lips meet his gaping mouth to give him a fleeting but passionate kiss, in front of all of his customers, before he’s set upright and released. 

His cheeks burn with mortification and maybe, just maybe, the tiniest surge of arousal, as he uncomprehendingly watches Markus dart to their booth to retrieve his bag and take off out the door, the blast of winter air doing nothing for his heating face.

There’s a wolf-whistle from the back room, followed by muted giggles, and Connor inwardly curses his boyfriend.

Outwardly, he groans and slumps against the counter, panting softly.

Elijah’s never going to let him live this down.

[blackphoenixalchemylab]

Halloween 2018 Perfume Blends

Calling all witches, hags, demons, goat-lovers, and assorted tricksters! 

We've truly outdone ourselves with the Halloween 2018 collection, exploring strange new depths in diablerie as well as perfumerie. In addition to many classic treats, we've also got a spooky Chaos Theory, a timely Poe tale storyboarded in scent, a pile of Dead Leaves, a ribald new series of blends inspired by goats in classical art, and more! Never fear -- Trading Post's hair gloss and atmosphere sprays will be coming soon! 

You’ll find the full compendium of Halloween scent descriptions below, but BEWARE... You may find more thrills than e'er you bargained for.!

++ HALLOWEEN 2018

ALL SOULS A day of remembrance and intercession. Without the prayers and sacrifices of their families and loved ones, the faithful departed may not be cleansed of their venal sins, and thereby cannot attain beatific vision. On November 2nd, prayers are sung and offerings are made to aid lost souls in transcending purgatory. An incense blend that invokes the higher qualities of mercy and compassion, mingled with the soft, sugared currant scent of offertory soul cakes.

BLUE GHOST BLUES I feel myself sinkin' down I feel myself sinkin' down My body is freezin' I feel something cold creepin' around

My windows is rattlin' My doorknob turnin' round an' round My windows is rattlin' My doorknob turnin' round an' round This haunted house blues is killin' me I feel myself sinkin' down

I been fastin' in this haunted house Six long months today I been fastin' in this haunted house Six long months today The Blue Ghost is got the house surrounded, Lord And I can't get away

They got shotguns and pistols Standin' all round my door They got shotguns and pistols Standin' all round my door They haunt me all night long So I can't sleep no more

The Blue Ghost haunts me all night The nightmare rides me all night long The Blue Ghost haunts me at night The nightmare rides me all night long They worry me so in this haunted house I wished I was dead and gone

- Lonnie Johnson

A ward against evil: bay rum, whiskey, cigar smoke, black pepper, and salt.

BONFIRE TOFFEE Our spin on a traditional Guy Fawkes Night treat: treacle toffee soaked in rich, dark bourbon.

DIA DE LOS MUERTOS A joyous celebration of La Catarina, La Flaca, La Muerte... Glorious, Beautiful Death. In Mexico, death is not something to be feared or hated; She is embraced, loved, and adored. La Muerte is fêted, as the celebrant "...chases after it, mocks it, courts it, hugs it, sleeps with it; it is his favorite plaything and his most lasting love." This is a Mexican paean to La Huesuda: dry, crackling leaves, the incense smoke of altars honoring Death and the Dead, funeral bouquets, the candies, chocolates, foods and tobacco of the ofrenda, amaranth, sweet cactus blossom and desert cereus.

FEEDING THE DEAD A barrel of beer, a pyramid of cakes, and three sticks of incense.

GHOST MUSIC Gloomy and bare the organ-loft, Bent-backed and blind the organist. From rafters looming shadowy, From the pipes’ tuneful company, Drifted together drowsily, Innumerable, formless, dim, The ghosts of long-dead melodies, Of anthems, stately, thunderous, Of Kyries shrill and tremulous: In melancholy drowsy-sweet They huddled there in harmony. Like bats at noontide rafter-hung.

- Robert Graves

Sheets of white musk and lavender curling around a melancholy song of violet root, iris, neroli, and honeysuckle.

GHOULISH Creepy like Creepy and as spooky as Spooky, this is the scent of a black cherry and coconut amaretto confection gently laced with saffron.

THE HAG The Hag is astride, This night for to ride; The Devill and shee together: Through thick, and through thin, Now out, and then in, Though ne'r so foule be the weather.

A Thorn or a Burr She takes for a Spurre: With a lash of a Bramble she rides now, Through Brakes and through Bryars, O're Ditches, and Mires, She followes the Spirit that guides now.

No Beast, for his food, Dares now range the wood; But husht in his laire he lies lurking: While mischiefs, by these, On Land and on Seas, At noone of Night are working,

The storme will arise, And trouble the skies; This night, and more for the wonder, The ghost from the Tomb Affrighted shall come, Cal'd out by the clap of the Thunder.

Black musk, bay leaves, galangal, bourbon vetiver, blackcurrant, and rum.

THE HARE In the black furrow of a field I saw an old witch-hare this night; And she cocked her lissome ear, And she eyed the moon so bright, And she nibbled o' the green; And I whispered 'Whsst! witch-hare,' Away like a ghostie o'er the field She fled, and left the moonlight there.

A leaper between worlds, the tiny trickster; she soars through liminal spaces, dancing in the strange shadows of dawn and twilight.

Warm fur and mandrake root, blue sage and tall grasses, honeysuckle-tinged moonlight, carrot seed, comfrey, and dandelion.

HUESOS DE SANTO On All Saints Day, Spanish families visit their loved ones in the cemeteries, keeping vigil throughout the evening, saying prayers for the dead. Family burial plots are cleaned and tended, and graves are adorned with gladiolas, chrysanthemums, and roses. Bone-shaped pastries called Saint's Bones, or the Bones of the Holy, are baked and shared in honor of the souls in Purgatory, and to remind us of those who no longer share our repast, but with whom we one day hope to be reunited with again.

Orange-glazed cake, dotted with anise seed, and filled with custard, set beside a bouquet of celebratory funeral flowers.

INSIDE THE GOLDEN AMBER OF HER EYEBALLS A ghost, though invisible, still is like a place your sight can knock on, echoing; but here within this thick black pelt, your strongest gaze will be absorbed and utterly disappear:

just as a raving madman, when nothing else can ease him, charges into his dark night howling, pounds on the padded wall, and feels the rage being taken in and pacified.

She seems to hide all looks that have ever fallen into her, so that, like an audience, she can look them over, menacing and sullen, and curl to sleep with them. But all at once

as if awakened, she turns her face to yours; and with a shock, you see yourself, tiny, inside the golden amber of her eyeballs suspended, like a prehistoric fly.

- Rainer Maria Rilke

Sleek black fur and gleaming amber shining in the shadows, a rumble of myrrh, and claws as sharp as ti leaf.

LAMBS-WOOL According to William Shepard Walsh, the Gentleman's Magazine for May of 1784 stated, "this is a constant ingredient at merrymaking on Holy Eve." He also quotes Vallancey's etymological speculation: "The first day of November was dedicated to the angel presiding over fruits, seeds, etc., and was therefore named La Mas Ubhal, -- that is, the day of the apple fruit, -- and being pronounced Lamasool, the English have corrupted the name to Lambs-wool."

A popular holy day beverage in 18th century Ireland: roasted apples mashed into warmed milk and ale, with nutmeg, sugar, ginger, and clove.

MAGNIFICENT AUTUMN By what a subtle alchemy the green leaves are transmuted into gold, as if molten by the fiery blaze of the hot sun! A magic covering spreads over the whole forest, and brightens into more gorgeous hues. The tree-tops seem bathed with the gold and crimson of an Italian sunset. Here and there a shade of green, here and there a tinge of purple, and a stain of scarlet so deep and rich, that the most cunning artifice of man is pale beside it. A thousand delicate shades melt into each other. They blend fantastically into one deep mass. They spread over the forest like a tapestry woven with a thousand hues.

Magnificent Autumn! He comes not like a pilgrim, clad in russet weeds. He comes not like a hermit, clad in gray. But he comes like a warrior, with the stain of blood upon his brazen mail. His crimson scarf is rent. His scarlet banner drips with gore. His step is like a flail upon the threshing floor.

The scene changes.

It is the Indian summer. The rising sun blazes through the misty air like a conflagration. A yellowish, smoky haze fills the atmosphere; and

A filmy mist,

Lies like a silver lining on the sky.

The wind is soft and low. It wafts to us the odor of forest leaves, that hang wilted on the dripping branches, or drop into the stream. Their gorgeous tints are gone, as if the autumnal rains had washed them out. Orange, yellow, and scarlet, all are changed to one melancholy russet hue. The birds, too, have taken wing, and have left their roofless dwellings. Not the whistle of a robin, not the twitter of an eavesdropping swallow, not the carol of one sweet, familiar voice! All gone. Only the dismal cawing of a crow, as he sits and curses, that the harvest is over, – or the chit-chat of an idle squirrel, – the noisy denizen of a hollow tree, – the mendicant friar of a large parish, – the absolute monarch of a dozen acorns!

Another change.

The wind sweeps through the forest with a sound like the blast of a trumpet. The dry leaves whirl in eddies through the air. A fret-work of hoar-frost covers the plain. The stagnant water in the pools and ditches is frozen into fantastic figures. Nature ceases from her labors, and prepares for the great change. In the low-hanging clouds, the sharp air, like a busy shuttle, weaves her shroud of snow. There is a melancholy and continual roar in the tops of the tall pines, like the roar of a cataract. It is the funeral anthem of the dying year.

A scent that wanders through the Ages of Autumn, from the last green leaf to the first breath of winter.

MIDNIGHT BONFIRE Lighting the path between worlds, the beacon at the threshold: night-blooming jasmine, smoldering maple leaves, a cluster of patchouli and blackened ti leaf, black sage, and pinewood smoke.

PUMPKIN CRÈME BRULEE With vanilla bean scrapings.

PUMPKIN DUST Shavings of white pumpkin rind and honey powder.

PUMPKIN MUSK AND BLACK OUDH A strangely romantic, disturbingly erotic perfume.

PUMPKIN TOBACCO Sweet black tobacco infused with dried pumpkin and soaked in bourbon.

SAMHAIN Truly the scent of autumn itself -- damp woods, fir needle, and black patchouli with the gentlest touches of warm pumpkin, clove, nutmeg, allspice, sweet red apple and mullein.

SAMHAINOPHOBIA The Fear of Halloween

Menacing Haitian vetiver, patchouli, and clove with a shock of bourbon geranium, grim oakmoss, and dread-inspiring balsams pierce the innocuous scent of autumn leaves.

SCARECROW TURNED PHILOSOPHER Once I said to a scarecrow, “You must be tired of standing in this lonely field.”

And he said, “The joy of scaring is a deep and lasting one, and I never tire of it.”

Said I, after a minute of thought, “It is true; for I too have known that joy.”

Said he, “Only those who are stuffed with straw can know it.”

Then I left him, not knowing whether he had complimented or belittled me.

A year passed, during which the scarecrow turned philosopher.

And when I passed by him again I saw two crows building a nest under his hat.

- Kahlil Gibran

Corn husks waving on an autumn breeze, beams of amber sunlight, hay bales, and late summer wildflowers.

SUCK IT Sexy and suckable: black cherry brandy.

THIS WAN WHITE HUMMING HIVE And where should the living feel alive But here in this wan white humming hive, As the moon wastes down, and the dawn turns cold, And one by one they creep back to the fold? And where should a man hold his mate and say: "One more, one more, ere we go their way"? For the year's on the turn, and it's All Souls' night, When the living can learn by the churchyard light.

White patchouli leaf, beeswax, ambergris, and pale incense.

WHEN COLORS ALL TO BLACK ARE CAST In night when colors all to black are cast, Distinction lost, or gone down with the light; The eye a watch to inward senses placed, Not seeing, yet still having powers of sight,

Gives vain alarums to the inward sense, Where fear stirred up with witty tyranny, Confounds all powers, and thorough self-offense, Doth forge and raise impossibility:

Such as in thick depriving darknesses, Proper reflections of the error be, And images of self-confusednesses, Which hurt imaginations only see;

And from this nothing seen, tells news of devils, Which but expressions be of inward evils.

- Lord Brooke Fulke Greville

Ink-black musk and dried blackberries, midnight opoponax and sweet labdanum.

THE WITCH BRIDE A fair witch crept to a young man's side, And he kiss'd her and took her for his bride.

But a Shape came in at the dead of night, And fill'd the room with snowy light.

And he saw how in his arms there lay A thing more frightful than mouth may say.

And he rose in haste, and follow'd the Shape Till morning crown'd an eastern cape.

And he girded himself, and follow'd still When sunset sainted the western hill.

But, mocking and thwarting, clung to his side, Weary day!-the foul Witch-Bride.

(Aw, c'mon, Allingham. Foul is a pretty strong choice of words, dontcha think?)

Pale and lovely, with eyes belladonna-wide: hemlock blossoms and ghostly nightshade veiled by wisteria, white frankincense, black amber, and narcissus resin.

YIPE In the vein (GET IT?) of Boo, Suck It, and Spooky, this is a gushing font of sweet bloody black cherry cream and crushed dried blackberries.

++ ALL HALLOWS CHAOS

Turbulent, disordered beauty: sensitive to initial conditions, topologically mixed, and approached by periodic orbits with abandon. A dynamical system expressed through scent.

Each bottle of Chaos Theory is truly unique, a fragrant fractal, and an exercise in the joy of chance and uncertainty! Each is a one-of-a-kind, utterly random combination of scents, the composition of which is based on whim, mood and gut instinct. Each bottle is numbered, and each bottle is unique.

Hail Eris! After a long hiatus, Chaos Theory is back!

This year, the aforementioned chaos is expressing itself through decidedly seasonal metaphors associated with gathering the harvest and welcoming the “dark half” of the year. Is it comfort you seek, or incantations whispered through a tear in the Veil? Thanks to the options below, you don’t have to choose — you can have it both ways! This is an exercise in the joy of chance and uncertainty! Each bottle is a one-of-a-kind, utterly random combination of scents, the composition of which is based on whim, mood and gut instinct.

Most common allergens have been omitted from the experiment. No pennyroyal, no nuts, no cinnamon, no cassia. Regardless, if you have any sensitivities, please do not participate in Chaos Theory. The contents of the oils are not recorded [that’s the whole point!] and we will not be able to answer questions about specific bottles of CT:VIII or guarantee that an allergen is not present in your order.

By purchasing CT:VIII, you agree to absolve Black Phoenix of any responsibility related to an allergic reaction to one of the oils in this series. Please make a responsible choice, and use caution and discretion when ordering. This is intended to be a fun, exciting project.

Each CT:VIII scent has a base inspired by one of our favorite ‘Weenies, in wildly varying proportions:

ALL HALLOWS CHAOS: PUMPKIN SPICE

Variety is the very spice of life, That gives it all its flavor.”

― William Cowper, 1785

Forget about the War on Christmas — the year’s most contentious seasonal battle is actually waged over this inescapable melange of palate-massaging flavors. We’ve got the formula down pat, and invite you to join us in a mad-science experiment: Just how far can we bend it before it breaks?

ALL HALLOWS CHAOS: SAMHAIN 

“Invention, it must be humbly admitted, does not consist in creating out of void, but out of chaos.” ― Mary Shelley, 1831 This Samhain, we’re reveling in the desecration of a classic blend: “Damp woods, fir needle, and black patchouli with the gentlest touches of warm pumpkin, clove, nutmeg, allspice, sweet red apple and mullein.”

++ HALLOWEEN: MASQUE OF THE RED DEATH

Art by Tenebrous Kate

Words by Edgar Allan Poe

THE RED DEATH The "Red Death" had long devastated the country. No pestilence had ever been so fatal, or so hideous. Blood was its Avatar and its seal --the redness and the horror of blood. There were sharp pains, and sudden dizziness, and then profuse bleeding at the pores, with dissolution. The scarlet stains upon the body and especially upon the face of the victim, were the pest ban which shut him out from the aid and from the sympathy of his fellow-men. And the whole seizure, progress and termination of the disease, were the incidents of half an hour.

Splatters of red musk, bruise-purple violets, vetiver, and pimento.

HAPPY AND DAUNTLESS AND SAGACIOUS But the Prince Prospero was happy and dauntless and sagacious. When his dominions were half depopulated, he summoned to his presence a thousand hale and light-hearted friends from among the knights and dames of his court, and with these retired to the deep seclusion of one of his castellated abbeys. This was an extensive and magnificent structure, the creation of the prince's own eccentric yet august taste. A strong and lofty wall girdled it in. This wall had gates of iron. The courtiers, having entered, brought furnaces and massy hammers and welded the bolts. They resolved to leave means neither of ingress or egress to the sudden impulses of despair or of frenzy from within. The abbey was amply provisioned. With such precautions the courtiers might bid defiance to contagion.

Imprisoned in frenzied joy: ribbons of raspberry and red currant streaming through thick goat’s milk.

IT WAS FOLLY TO GRIEVE, OR TO THINK The external world could take care of itself. In the meantime it was folly to grieve, or to think.

Ginger-squeezed champagne with crushed diamonds, orange blossoms, and peach blossoms.

THERE WAS BEAUTY, THERE WAS WINE The prince had provided all the appliances of pleasure. There were buffoons, there were improvisatori, there were ballet-dancers, there were musicians, there was Beauty, there was wine. All these and security were within. Without was the "Red Death."

Gushes of black and red wine splattering damask rose and white pear, engulfed in thick clove incense.

A MASKED BALL OF THE MOST UNUSUAL MAGNIFICENCE It was toward the close of the fifth or sixth month of his seclusion, and while the pestilence raged most furiously abroad, that the Prince Prospero entertained his thousand friends at a masked ball of the most unusual magnificence.

Opulent golden oudh, red benzoin, and bitter almond.

A GIGANTIC CLOCK OF EBONY It was in this apartment, also, that there stood against the western wall, a gigantic clock of ebony. Its pendulum swung to and fro with a dull, heavy, monotonous clang; and when the minute-hand made the circuit of the face, and the hour was to be stricken, there came from the brazen lungs of the clock a sound which was clear and loud and deep and exceedingly musical, but of so peculiar a note and emphasis that, at each lapse of an hour, the musicians of the orchestra were constrained to pause, momentarily, in their performance, to hearken to the sound; and thus the waltzers perforce ceased their evolutions; and there was a brief disconcert of the whole gay company; and, while the chimes of the clock yet rang, it was observed that the giddiest grew pale, and the more aged and sedate passed their hands over their brows as if in confused reverie or meditation. But when the echoes had fully ceased, a light laughter at once pervaded the assembly; the musicians looked at each other and smiled as if at their own nervousness and folly, and made whispering vows, each to the other, that the next chiming of the clock should produce in them no similar emotion; and then, after the lapse of sixty minutes, (which embrace three thousand and six hundred seconds of the Time that flies,) there came yet another chiming of the clock, and then were the same disconcert and tremulousness and meditation as before.

The chiming of the clock: ebony wood and black pepper, narcissus blossom and tuberose, clanging with dull, heavy opoponax and thick olibanum.

THE TASTES OF THE DUKE WERE PECULIAR But, in spite of these things, it was a gay and magnificent revel. The tastes of the duke were peculiar. He had a fine eye for colors and effects. He disregarded the decora of mere fashion. His plans were bold and fiery, and his conceptions glowed with barbaric lustre. There are some who would have thought him mad. His followers felt that he was not. It was necessary to hear and see and touch him to be sure that he was not.

The swirl of a thousand glittering vices: absinthe and laudanum, opium poppy and neroli, star anise and black currant, whip leather and iron shackles, gilded vanilla flower and King mandarin.

GLARE AND GLITTER AND PIQUANCY AND PHANTASM He had directed, in great part, the moveable embellishments of the seven chambers, upon occasion of this great fete; and it was his own guiding taste which had given character to the masqueraders. Be sure they were grotesque. There were much glare and glitter and piquancy and phantasm -- much of what has been since seen in "Hernani." There were arabesque figures with unsuited limbs and appointments. There were delirious fancies such as the madman fashions.

Delirious fancies such as the madman fashions, arabesque figures with unsuited limbs and appointments: orris absolute and leather contorted by cherry and orange blossom.

A MULTITUDE OF DREAMS There was much of the beautiful, much of the wanton, much of the bizarre, something of the terrible, and not a little of that which might have excited disgust. To and fro in the seven chambers there stalked, in fact, a multitude of dreams. And these -- the dreams -- writhed in and about, taking hue from the rooms, and causing the wild music of the orchestra to seem as the echo of their steps.

A blackened lavender mist, thick with opoponax, licorice root, and benzoin.

ALL IS SILENT SAVE THE VOICE OF THE CLOCK And, anon, there strikes the ebony clock which stands in the hall of the velvet. And then, for a moment, all is still, and all is silent save the voice of the clock. The dreams are stiff-frozen as they stand. But the echoes of the chime die away -- they have endured but an instant -- and a light, half-subdued laughter floats after them as they depart. And now again the music swells, and the dreams live, and writhe to and fro more merrily than ever, taking hue from the many-tinted windows through which stream the rays from the tripods.

Dreams writhing to and fro, bubbling up from half-subdued laughter: pink peppercorn, jasmine sambac, and cypress bubbling up through half-subdued white lavender, stabbed through with streams of red musk and black currant.

THE NIGHT IS WANING AWAY But to the chamber which lies most westwardly of the seven, there are now none of the maskers who venture; for the night is waning away; and there flows a ruddier light through the blood-colored panes; and the blackness of the sable drapery appals; and to him whose foot falls upon the sable carpet, there comes from the near clock of ebony a muffled peal more solemnly emphatic than any which reaches their ears who indulge in the more remote gaieties of the other apartments. But these other apartments were densely crowded, and in them beat feverishly the heart of life.

Night-blooming jasmine and cereus reflected through ruddy musk and crimson amber.

THE SOUNDING OF MIDNIGHT UPON THE CLOCK And the revel went whirlingly on, until at length there commenced the sounding of midnight upon the clock. And then the music ceased, as I have told; and the evolutions of the waltzers were quieted; and there was an uneasy cessation of all things as before. But now there were twelve strokes to be sounded by the bell of the clock; and thus it happened, perhaps, that more of thought crept, with more of time, into the meditations of the thoughtful among those who revelled. And thus, too, it happened, perhaps, that before the last echoes of the last chime had utterly sunk into silence, there were many individuals in the crowd who had found leisure to become aware of the presence of a masked figure which had arrested the attention of no single individual before. And the rumor of this new presence having spread itself whisperingly around, there arose at length from the whole company a buzz, or murmur, expressive of disapprobation and surprise --then, finally, of terror, of horror, and of disgust.

Terror, horror, and disgust: a bowel-churning sweet clench of myrhh and green musk in a pool of suffocating black moss and a shock of white cognac.

THE SCARLET HORROR In an assembly of phantasms such as I have painted, it may well be supposed that no ordinary appearance could have excited such sensation. In truth the masquerade license of the night was nearly unlimited; but the figure in question had out-Heroded Herod, and gone beyond the bounds of even the prince's indefinite decorum. There are chords in the hearts of the most reckless which cannot be touched without emotion. Even with the utterly lost, to whom life and death are equally jests, there are matters of which no jest can be made. The whole company, indeed, seemed now deeply to feel that in the costume and bearing of the stranger neither wit nor propriety existed. The figure was tall and gaunt, and shrouded from head to foot in the habiliments of the grave. The mask which concealed the visage was made so nearly to resemble the countenance of a stiffened corpse that the closest scrutiny must have had difficulty in detecting the cheat. And yet all this might have been endured, if not approved, by the mad revellers around. But the mummer had gone so far as to assume the type of the Red Death. His vesture was dabbled in blood --and his broad brow, with all the features of the face, was besprinkled with the scarlet horror.

When the eyes of Prince Prospero fell upon this spectral image (which with a slow and solemn movement, as if more fully to sustain its role, stalked to and fro among the waltzers) he was seen to be convulsed, in the first moment with a strong shudder either of terror or distaste; but, in the next, his brow reddened with rage.

"Who dares?" he demanded hoarsely of the courtiers who stood near him -- "who dares insult us with this blasphemous mockery? Seize him and unmask him -- that we may know whom we have to hang at sunrise, from the battlements!"

Blasphemous mockery: blood musk and vetiver.

A GROUP OF PALE COURTIERS It was in the eastern or blue chamber in which stood the Prince Prospero as he uttered these words. They rang throughout the seven rooms loudly and clearly -- for the prince was a bold and robust man, and the music had become hushed at the waving of his hand.

It was in the blue room where stood the prince, with a group of pale courtiers by his side. At first, as he spoke, there was a slight rushing movement of this group in the direction of the intruder, who at the moment was also near at hand, and now, with deliberate and stately step, made closer approach to the speaker.

A sycophant’s polished stench: green musk fougere, lime, and rose-tufted wig powder.

A CERTAIN NAMELESS AWE But from a certain nameless awe with which the mad assumptions of the mummer had inspired the whole party, there were found none who put forth hand to seize him; so that, unimpeded, he passed within a yard of the prince's person; and, while the vast assembly, as if with one impulse, shrank from the centres of the rooms to the walls, he made his way uninterruptedly, but with the same solemn and measured step which had distinguished him from the first, through the blue chamber to the purple -- through the purple to the green -- through the green to the orange -- through this again to the white -- and even thence to the violet, ere a decided movement had been made to arrest him.

Death unimpeded: bone-white sandalwood, dry cognac, and chilled ambergris accord.

A DEADLY TERROR THAT HAD SEIZED UPON ALL It was then, however, that the Prince Prospero, maddening with rage and the shame of his own momentary cowardice, rushed hurriedly through the six chambers, while none followed him on account of a deadly terror that had seized upon all.

He bore aloft a drawn dagger, and had approached, in rapid impetuosity, to within three or four feet of the retreating figure, when the latter, having attained the extremity of the velvet apartment, turned suddenly and confronted his pursuer. There was a sharp cry --and the dagger dropped gleaming upon the sable carpet, upon which, instantly afterwards, fell prostrate in death the Prince Prospero. Then, summoning the wild courage of despair, a throng of the revellers at once threw themselves into the black apartment, and, seizing the mummer, whose tall figure stood erect and motionless within the shadow of the ebony clock, gasped in unutterable horror at finding the grave-cerements and corpse-like mask which they handled with so violent a rudeness, untenanted by any tangible form.

The wild courage of despair: a screech of blood orange and a splash of blood entangled in a corpse-mask of tattered white sandalwood stained with balsam and a grime-crusted winding sheet.

ILLIMITABLE DOMINION OVER ALL And now was acknowledged the presence of the Red Death. He had come like a thief in the night. And one by one dropped the revellers in the blood-bedewed halls of their revel, and died each in the despairing posture of his fall. And the life of the ebony clock went out with that of the last of the gay. And the flames of the tripods expired. And Darkness and Decay and the Red Death held illimitable dominion over all.

Darkness, Decay, and the Red Death: blood musk and black tobacco, birch tar and bleeding cypress sap.

Listen to Poe’s complete tale here, on our YouTube Channel:

++ PICKMAN GALLERY 2018

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: ARKHAM’S PICKMAN GALLERY ACQUIRES CURIOUS COLLECTION OF GOAT ART, DEEMED ‘GREATEST OF ALL TIME’ Greatest Of All Time: Portraits of Genus Capra on view at the Pickman Gallery from September 22 to December 28, 2018, Arkham, MA — On view from September 18 through December 28, 2018 at Pickman Gallery, Arkham, MA, Greatest Of All Time: Portraits of Genus Capra. Greatest Of All Time is guest curated by the Santa Fe Art Institute’s Antonia Vasquez-Thackeray, who also holds a degree in Livestock Science.  In this first-of-its-kind exhibition, Mx. Vasquez-Thackeray explores the social co-evolution of humankind and goatkind, a history which stretches back at least 10,000 years. Researchers note that goat remains have been found at archaeological sites in Western Asia including Jericho, Choga Mami, Djeitun, and Çayönü. Via their innate curiosity and horizontally-pupilled eyes, goats have enjoyed a unique view of human civilization, and our ancestors’ myths and legends have proven us nothing if not fearful of their scrutiny. “Our projections in terms of goat consciousness and goat archetypes have eclipsed anything a goat might tell us about us, or itself,“ Vasquez-Thackeray writes in the introduction to her upcoming MY GOAT, MY INQUISITOR, a salvo against the bias and anthropomorphism that has infected the relations between these two closely interrelated worlds -- but which carefully does not disavow the propensity for deceit, diabolism and witchcraft within the Caprian mind. Greatest of All Time consists of works hand-selected to commune with our species’ most recent common ancestor. About this evolutionary MacGuffin, Max Robinson, Ph.D. Molecular Biology and Biotechnology & Evolutionary Genetics, University of Washington, has written: “Millions of years ago, there was some kind of animal that eventually evolved into both goats and humans. It probably had claws rather than hooves or hands. It had a liver, four legs, eyes, and a brain, just like humans and goats still do.” Unfathomably, a lineage extends directly from that ancestor to this season’s exhibition, which will serve as a family reunion of sorts: several goats from Vasquez-Thackeray’s personal herd will be in residence as docents throughout the duration of the show. (Their reactions to the art as well as to the guests will be recorded via motion-capture and analyzed by individuals from SFAI, MIT, and, by special request, members of Arkham’s Thousand Young Lodge.

A BOAR AND A GOAT 18th century Russian lubok, illustrator unknown Red amber, frankincense CO2 absolute, green fig, labdanum, King mandarin, Atlas cedar, and bitter almond.

A HOARD OF CREATURES WITH THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS BEFORE A TAVERN Cornelis Saftleven Peru balsam, leather, castoreum accord, frankincense, and hay.

A YOUNG BOY AND HIS BROTHER SEATED ON A GOAT Christoffel Pierson Polished mahogany, copal resin, Java sandalwood, teakwood, and Sumantran patchouli.

AN ENCAMPMENT OF SHEPHERDS Tassili N'Ajjer, 4000-1500BC Tonka bean, red clay, rose tobacco, and oudh.

ANIMAL ALLEGORY Cornelis Saftleven Dust, dry incense, parchment, and tobacco leaf.

BOY WITH GOAT IN A LANDSCAPE Rudolf Koller Grapevine and ivy, olive blossom, lavender, cypress, bay leaf, honey myrtle, Tuscany sage, and jasmine sambac.

CABRAS Giuseppe Palizzi Black pine, white sage, creeping ivy, and wild juniper.

EEN SATYR Jacob Jordaens A heavy, animalic musk with cognac, fir balsam, grapevine, black cypress, patchouli, honey, and copaiba balsam.

THE GOAT AND THE VINE Harrison Weir Golden apples, cedar and redwood trellises heavy with grapevine, beeswax, hemp, vanilla benzoin, and bois de rose.

THE GREAT HE-GOAT Francisco Goya Haitian vetiver, Egyptian amber, carnation, black musk, pomegranate, patchouli, and smoked ginger.

HALF-HUMAN, HALF-MONKEY BARBERS SHAVING A GOAT Engraving by G. van der Gucht after J. Wootton Bay rum, hay, dried alfalfa, aftershave, and cork stalk.

JACOB WITH THE DAUGHTERS OF LABAN

Louis Gauffier Lebanese cedar, chamomile, frankincense, and cinnamon.

JUPITER NOURISHED BY THE GOAT AMALTHEA Engraving by Jacques Jordaens Goat’s milk, nectar, ambrosia, and honey.

LITHOGRAPH OF A MOUNTAIN GOAT H Weir White sandalwood, black pepper, muguet, agarwood, labdanum, and 3-year aged patchouli.

RUHENDE ZIEGE MIT KITZCHEN

Johann Christian Reinhart Brown musk, leather, castoreum accord, white cedar, amber oudh, and clove bud.

STUDIE EINER ZIEGE Pieter Boel Sweet labdanum with clove, tobacco absolute, and guiac wood.

TWO SHEEP AND TWO GOATS RESTING TOGETHER IN A FIELD A. Ducote Sweet vetiver, bourbon vanilla, and wool.

VENUS PANDEMOS Venus Pandemos Hay, rose otto, red benzoin, torch smoke, and pink carnation.

THE WITCHES’ RIDE

Otto Goetze Red roses and vetiver with cashmere incense, rue, and cauldron spices.

ZOE AND THE GOAT

Lorenz Frølich Caramelized patchouli, cream, and thick golden honey.

++ HALLOWEEN: POMEGRANATE GROVE

About the pomegranate I must say nothing, for its story is something of a mystery. - Pausanias

POMEGRANATE GROVE: ALICE

POMEGRANATE GROVE: DORIAN

POMEGRANATE GROVE: EMBALMING FLUID

POMEGRANATE GROVE: MOROCCO

POMEGRANATE GROVE: SNAKE OIL

++ HALLOWEEN: PILE OF LEAVES

Every leaf tells a story.

DEAD LEAVES AND MAPLE SAP

DEAD LEAVES, BLACKBERRY, AND RED PATCHOULI

DEAD LEAVES, GREEN COGNAC, IRIS ROOT, AND WHITE LEATHER

DEAD LEAVES, SWEET MYRRH, LEATHER, GREEN POMELO, AND RED CURRANT

DEAD LEAVES, BOURBON VETIVER, NAGARMOTHA, AND VANILLA ABSOLUTE

DEAD LEAVES AND RED CARNATIONS

DEAD LEAVES AND PUMPKIN SEEDS

DEAD LEAVES AND SCOTCH

DEAD LEAVES AND WARM SUGAR COOKIES

DEAD LEAVES, SWEET OAKMOSS, WHITE SAGE, AND CHAPARRAL

DEAD LEAVES AND VANILLA INCENSE

DEAD LEAVES, APRICOT, AMBERGRIS, AND TOBACCO

DEAD LEAVES AND COFFEE BEANS

DEAD LEAVES, BLACK TEA, AND TOBACCO LEAF

DEAD LEAVES, MAGNOLIA CHAMPACA, AMBERETTE SEED, PERU BALSAM, AND SUGARED CHESTNUTS

DEAD LEAVES, RED WINE, AND BLACK OUDH

[cutiecrates]

Cutie Reviews: Tokyo Treat May 18

Ahhhh, I took a bit longer than I would have liked to. But with good reason.

Sorta.

Basically, I spent the past few days going through all of the old crates to sort the items and dispose of the boxes/crates. They take up a lot of space when you order so many, and I bought some cute little boxes to sort the items by type and take them to my room.

I still have some to go through, but I made a lot of progress. I think I threw away about 20 boxes. But I did keep a handful of them either because I had use for them, or someone I know did. It’s actually been kind of fun going through them :3 and oddly therapeutic.

Anyway, let’s get on with it! If you like anime, manga, and video games, this box is perfect for you!

Theme: ANIME SNACK ATTACK

So, as you can see, we’re having an anime (and manga and video game) theme. Three things I adore!

LUCKY TREAT

The Lucky Treat is full of anime inspired items, and Pokemon! One of the most popular merchandising brands you find in these boxes lately. Like literally, nearly each box I've gotten recently seems to have some form of Pokemon item in it (not counting the makeups. But I know they have pokemon beauty products.)

MINUTE MAID CRAFTZ CHERRY & PEACH

I'm putting this here because the image of this is the very first one in the post. You can see it on the right-hand side there. Anyway, this is a drink by Minute Maid, a very popular juice brand that I like x3 It combines the sweet, flowery tastes of cherry and peach- I think this would perfect for spring time!

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

If you like Peach then you'd like this drink, basically. The Peach is overwhelmingly strong, and there is a faint cherry-ness to it, but it mostly blends into the peach. It was refreshing~

Sriracha Rice Chips & Don Taro Udon Snack

First up we got some delicious looking Sriracha chips made from brown rice and soy beans. As you can see on the bag in the pic. These are gluten free and flavored with a spicy kick! Perfect for those intense scenes; or when you start feeling yourself getting tired and need a wake-me-up.

Although, there was one little problem with mine...

Seeing this nice, big clean slice in the bag had me worried a teensy-bit. It came like that out of the box and it wasn't tampered with as far as I know- so I can only assume it was a last-second manufacturing thing that went unnoticed. It happens.They seemed fine, so I just put them in another bag.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Besides a tiny bit of staleness they tasted really good x3 They had a "deep crunch" to them, being sorta soft (which was either staleness or due to being made out of bean and rice) but still crispy. Oddly they reminded me of chicken-flavored ramen.

They are spicy, but it has to build up. It sort of lingers on the tongue for a few minutes but otherwise you won't notice it just eating a couple. It wasn’t really hot though for being made with sriracha. But I really like eating it so maybe I just didn’t notice?

Our next item in the pic is a snacking noodle dagashi, flavored after a real udon bowl.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥

Honestly they tasted a lot like those chips did. Minus the rice-bean texture. They're not bad or anything, but I'm not super-obsessed with snacking noodles; or noodles as a whole. I have to be in the mood for them. But they didn't taste bad, as I said, and if you really like crunchy snacks (or ramen) you would probably like these.

MENTAIKO UMAIBO & SENZU BEAN EDAMAME

Oh, our usual Umaibo and share pack snacks! How I love and sometimes detest you~

Depending on the flavors that is.

Our Umaibo is one I've had, maybe two other times by now. Mentaiko is "salted, creamy pollock roe", or fish eggs if you're not familiar with the term.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥

Not being a fish person, I've never tried fish eggs before. They haven't appealed to me. So I can't say if this tastes accurately or not- to me it reminds me of their cheese-flavored ones. I’m not a big fan of this, but it’s not bad either. It's not as strange to me as it originally was the first time I tried it.

Now, I've already given my opinions of these "share packs" so I won't waste time doing it again. For this month we get packs of this edamame themed snack with a light flavoring on them. First of all, each bag is 64 calories, making this a nice snack for those who worry over their weight or just want something a little healthier.

Apparently chosen to represent the "Senzou Bean" from Dragonball. Each bag also has a cute design, made to look like a mesh bag or pouch filled with edamame!

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

If they reminded me of anything on smell alone, I'd say "cheez-its and some green vegetable". Their taste and texture is about the same too, but I do get an edamame vibe. I think its adorable how they look like them too x3 and they have a light saltiness to them that is pleasant.

Besides the snacking noodles, I’d say these were the top in crunchiness.

DRAGON BALL CHEESE PUFFS

You read that right: Dragonball Cheese Puffs. These are 91.9 calories for the bag, and include a fun card as part of a game series. I know they've made these, but I'm used to seeing the gummy ones; but because I only buy those types, it was neat to try another kind.

So... as you can see, I got Vegeta! He's my favorite x3 I can't ever use the card for its intended purpose- but I'm happy regardless.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

They're basically like any other cheese puff-based snack. However, the flavoring was actually very light on the cheese and tasted more like the corn its made out of. But it didn't taste bad, and the crispy texture is nice. These are good as long as you're not expecting a huge, cheesy flavor.

ALMOND TOFU CHOCOBI & CHOCOPIE

I think I'll swap things around and start with the Chocobi; it hasn't been in the box for a while. This time, rather than a fruit it's flavored after a specific dish: Almond Tofu, a smooth and healthy Japanese dessert. I've never tried it before but I assume it's like yogurt or pudding with a jelly texture.

The box is 139.4 calories, and was made in celebration of yet-another Crayon Shin-chan movie. This one features stickers from different regions in Japan, the one I got says Aichi. But to be honest, the only one of these I recognized was Hokkaido. I kinda wish I got that one~

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥

As usual Chocobi as a texture is pretty nice. It's crispy, and they come in such a cute shape!

However... as usual, they also go stale VERY quickly.... So I've never been a fan of them.

Now these, the flavor isn't as odd as past ones I received. It's kind of like sweet, very light coconut, maybe a tiny bit almond x vanilla-ish. I really like almonds and tofu, but I didn't come to this snack knowing what to expect so I can’t say I’m being picky.

Our other item here I was a lot more excited for, meanwhile. The Petite Chocopie by LOTTE! It's basically chocolate covered cake and marshmallow cream- but since when has that ever been a bad thing??

Per each cake/pie its 74 calories, which isn't that bad if you want something sweet. According to the back they also have a type that features a chocolate drizzle rather than coating, and has chocolate and marshmallow cream inside~

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Right off, if you don't like dark chocolate then you probably won't like these. I don't think they're made with it, but they certainly tasted like it. My mom thought so too, and she hates dark chocolate- which is a shame because I really like it. But at least I know it'll be safe from her ;3

These were pretty good, but I did have one complaint. As you can see in the picture I took they don't really sync up with the photo on the package. Which is common, I know, but what the actual item lacks in thickness it also lacks in taste unfortunately. With the rich chocolate and cake/cookies under it, the marshmallow cream is too thin- you barely taste it, if at all.

SHIN-CHAN GUMMY, SPLATOON GUMMIES, AND THOMAS THE TRAIN CHEWY CANDY

This single piece of Shin-chan Gummy is available in soda/ramune, and cola flavors. As much as I enjoy soda/ramune, I really, REALLY wish I got cola. Or maybe one of each. The image in the booklet is a tiny bit misleading because you only get 1.

I kinda had to leave it in the package because by the time I got to it (a week ago, just about) it had like... melted into the plastic. At least I assume. I tried to remove it and it was not coming. I took the picture, then I mangled it to get as much as I could out.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥

I LOVED how this tasted. Exactly like the soda/ramune flavor I like. However, I couldn't necessarily judge the quality of the gummy due to unforeseen issues. As noted above...

The next item I got was another one I was excited for cus who doesn't love Splatoon, am I right?

I only have the first game for now, but I'll be getting the Switch VERY SOON, so I'm excited to get the second on x3 I also have a cute pink water-filled squid I got from the toy store like a year or so ago.

Anyway, these gummies are available in Orange and Melon. There's also a very rare gummy shaped like an octopus that can be found in certain bags. Mine wasn't one of them. One bag is 155 calories, which is kind of lame due to how small it is. BUT at the same time, I've seen worse.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Not only are the gummies really cute, but they taste very good too. I was also happy to see that the bag is zip-lock style and they lasted for 4 months with no sign of aging!

I was so excited when I got them back in May that I couldn't resist trying them then (=´3`=)

The gummy texture... I can’t really describe. It's chewy, but not hard, and they don't take five minutes to eat either. More like a few seconds.

Our last item in this picture is the Thomas the Tank Engine Chewy Candy!

The inner-child in me was really excited to see this. Not only because the candy itself sounded good, but I grew up on the Thomas the Tank Engine stop-motion cartoons x3 Ironically, now that I'm older he seems a lot more popular. That or I just never noticed it before. There's also another sense of irony here though. Back in August, I was re-watching the super old original stop-motions I grew up on; not for any real reason, I was just bored and like the background noise.

Okay, so anyway the candy is a grape chewy candy by Lotte. It looks a lot like gum but it's kind of thicker, and what's fun is that each piece has a little puzzle on it, or you can fold the wrapper in certain ways to make shapes or "toys". Each stick, or the whole pack is 85 calories. I can't actually tell.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

It pretty much tastes exactly like grape hi-chew, the only difference is the texture. So if you like Hi-chew or grape candy you'd like this. If you don't then... you probably won't.

(Oh, and if you're curious my favorite is/was James~)

BORUTO GUMMY & BORUTO PINEAPPLE JELLIES

Our last items of the box are these two "Boruto" snacks! Boruto, if you never heard of the series is essentially a sequel to "Naruto". A series I was very fond of. However, I don't like Boruto. It's not because of the characters or anything, but because of some "decisions" they made I just didn't agree with. Besides the cute packaging and decorative detail on the bag, the jellies each feature a decorative lid design based on various Boruto characters. Each Jelly is 19 calories, and are pineapple flavored, with real pineapple juice!

This box was essentially full of nostalgia for me x3 when I was younger I loved eating little jellies. They became pretty scarce as I got older though, and one day they kind of just stopped showing up. It's a bit disappointing.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

They taste really good, it's not an overwhelming Pineapple flavor. I love the slippery, soft, squishy texture~

Our final item is this Boruto energy-drink flavored Hand Gummy :3 Hand Gummies are popular and fun, being based on the game Rock-Paper-Scissors. I've gotten one or two other gummies like this before, but if I recall they were much smaller- but I got scissors both times, including this one!

That's usually my go-to gesture and always has been ;D But you can also look at is as "peace sign" too if you wanted. Anyway, these are energy-drink flavored, but the booklet assures us that no energy drink ingredients were actually used in making this. It's simply BASED on a fizzy, sweet-and-sour pineapple energy drink.

That rested any concerns I had, because I'm one of those who people who avoids energy drinks at all cost. If I want energy I'll just eat sugar.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

It pretty much tastes like the jelly, but the flavor was stronger. I also really liked its super-soft texture x3

♥ Cutie Ranking ♥

Quality - 4 out of 5. The only real reason why I marked it down was because of that slice in the rice chips bag. I'm sure this was an extremely rare thing though, I usually don't have any problems with any of the items I get in this box.  

Content - 3 out of 5. I didn't hate anything at all this time around- which is almost as rare as the above mention. Usually I find one item I detest, and I pretty much only disliked one item, and even then it wasn't that bad...

Theme - 5 out of 5. Besides a couple of items, it was pretty much covered in anime stuff!

Total Rank: 12 out of 15 Cuties. I genuinely LOVED this box in comparison to the April box. It had a couple of faults but nothing serious that I couldn't overlook. Considering how excited I was for this, I feel like they could have done better- but they did really good! Maybe like a... B+

♥ Cutie’s Scale of Yummy ♥

1. Cherry x Peach Drink - It was so refreshing~

2. Splatoon Gummies - I can't say I prefer orange or melon flavors in comparison to ramune, grape, or cola- but they tasted so good and looked adorable!

3. Thomas Grape Chewy Candy - Loved. Loved. Loved!

4. Hand Gummy - I liked this just a little bit better than the jelly. It's very soft and chewy, I'd recommend these if you can find them, they come in many flavors.

5. Pineapple Jellies - I loved their soft, wiggly-jiggly texture~

6. Chocopie -  I loved the soft, cakey texture and its dark chocolate-esque taste~

7. Rice Chips - Delicious!

8. Shin-chan Gummy - I was disappointed with this because it was delicious! I just wish it hadn't stuck to its packaging. Well, that and I wish we got maybe one or two more~

9. Edamame snack - They tasted good but I just liked other stuff better.

10. Dragonball Cheese Puffs - I liked how they tasted, but I felt like it might have been a tiny bit misleading cause it didn't taste like cheese to me. I don't know if its because the information in the booklet was wrong, or... I’m very happy with the card I got though!

11. Mentaiko Umaibo - It tastes better than when I first tried it. But I can't say it's in my top 5 Umaibo list...

12. Udon Snacking Noodles - As I mentioned, these I have to be in the mood for. They don't taste bad but it's not something I'd probably reach for.

13. Almond Tofu snack - I really am not just a fan of Chocobi...

Alrighty, here we are at the end of another review. I'm sorry if it seemed like the quality started lowering so far down. I'm feeling kinda tired and my head hurts suddenly, and after trying to write these twice I really didn't want to have to try again you know?

Anyway, I hope you'll stay tuned for the next review :3 it'll be May's Doki Doki crate, then we'll be moving onto June stuff!

Until then, stay cute!

[ccorneliast]

clouds in my coffee - a carrison fanfiction

Rating: T Summary: Carrie Fisher is a published author who just got out of a toxic, long relatioship. Harrison Ford is a divorced father of two who owns a little coffee shop on 53rd street in New York.What will happen when they meet? Full of coffee, books and cuteness. Disclaimer: this is a real person fan fiction, so it all definitely came from our imagination and we’re not trying to offend anyone (you know the drill). A/N:  I've been wanting to write a coffee shop au for these two for the longest time so I'm so excited to have found the perfect person to write it with! Angie ( @soreidy27 ) is a goddess! We planned this great fanfiction for y’all and I’m so happy to have the best co-writer ever! 

This first chapter goes out to one of favorite people, Ashley ( @hansoloorgana ) for all the support, love and cheerleading. We hope you love it!

The quotes in the fic are from "Surrender The Pink" by Carrie Fisher, so we don't claim them.

On AO3

I hope you like it and don't forget to tell me your thoughts on it!

The bag hanging on her shoulder weighed her down. Inside, a slick silver laptop and a little black moleskine waited to be used for the first time in months.

Carrie walked into a small coffee shop on 52nd street, the big, cursive letters in the banner read: “Dorothy’s”.

The strong smell of ground coffee beans and milk hits her instantly. The place is half full, a couple of students and a few adults sitting sparsely. A tiny bell sings as she closes the door behind her and looks around. Carrie picks a small, round table at the very end of the coffee shop, next to the cookie and muffin display. She walks hurriedly, brushing her hair off her face as she goes.

Breathe, Carrie. You’ve done it once, you can do it again .

She smooths her shirt absentmindedly, though it isn’t wrinkled at all.

“Hey doll, what can I get ya?” A somewhat short, blonde lady dressed in a brown apron asks in a thick southern accent. Her nearly wrinkled blue eyes run across Carrie’s features, the way her eyes move and the smile that plays on her lips giving Carrie an uneasy feeling that settles in her already stumbling stomach. I guess you do see everything in New York.

“A capuchinho, please.” Carrie gives the lady a small smile. Charlotte , the name tag read.

“Comin’ right up, doll,” she struts back to the counter and prepares her order.

While she waits, Carrie removes the laptop and the notebook from her bag. She sits them on the table and taps a pen on the wood.

He’s gone, she thought to herself. You’ll never have to see him again. That calms her down for a millisecond before her mind starts spiraling: oh no, I’ll never see him again. I’ll never feel his lips on mine, I’ll never say I love you again, I won’t have a date on national holidays!

The song that was playing on the stereo changes and British rock fills up the room. Something about finding the love of your life and never wanting to let go. Great!  

Carrie forces herself to focus on work. She opens up the untitled document on her computer and reads the last few sentences she’d written:

“Rudy stood with the door of the limousine open behind him. He’d thrown down the gauntlet of his indifference and now Dinah picked it up. She raised her hand in a wave.”

Words swim around in her head. What should Dinah say? It needs to be witty, sharp. It needs to be memorable, like the abso-fucking-lutely! at the end of the first episode of Sex and the City. This is Rudy and Dinah’s Carrie-and-Big moment.

“ Don’t be a stranger,” she called with gaiety.

Rudy smiled.

Carrie read the last paragraph over again. It doesn’t sound perfect yet. It needs soul.

“Don’t be a stranger,” she called with mock gaiety. “Don’t be Albert Camus.”

Rudy smiled. “The Outsider,” he called, correcting her. Dinah flushed.

“Here you go, ma’am,” a deep voice echoes behind Carrie, but she’s too deep in her trance to get her eyes off of the screen.

“Don’t be either of them. Don’t be anyone if you can help it,” she said, disappearing into her building.

Carrie’s hand grasps the small, white cup full of the energy she so needed.

“Suddenly her head popped back around the corner. “Actually, it can be either one,” she said hurriedly. “I think it depends on the translation.”

“Aham,” the same voice coughs behind Carrie. “You’re welcome.” That tone is unmistakably sarcastic.

Carrie spins around in her chair, in search of the mysterious voice. “Excuse me?”

It’s a man! , she thinks to herself. Well, of course it was a man. She was not expecting someone like him, though. Tall, tan and incredibly handsome, a man in the same brown apron wore a smug look on his face.

“Excuse you,” he cocks one eyebrow and grins. “When someone brings you what you asked for you say thank you.”

“Oh sugar, it's alrigh’! This pretty doll here was just too into her squibblin’.” The older woman, Charlotte , says to the man almost three times her size.

“Still, that's no reason to be rude.” His words and his condescending tone made Carrie raise a perfectly pluck eyebrow as her eyes focused on his grayish blues, defiance blatantly shown through her freshly roasted coffee hues.

Because of the indignation swirling in caused by the man's accusations, the brunette lost her train of thought and creativity on her writing.

“I was never meant to be rude, as you put it.” Carrie gestures around with her hand. “As this very lovely lady said, I was focused and I do apologize, however that is also no reason for you to speak to a stranger, who is also a paying customer, like that.” Carrie responded back, her eyes taking in the disbelief at her words subtly playing on his scruffy yet undoubtedly handsome features. I guess no one ever talks to you like that. She thought silently in her head with a bit of satisfaction, taking his shocked expression at her comeback. The perfect payback for his interruption.

Charlotte and the man exchange glances. His expression softens as the blonde woman grips his arm once, through his cotton shirt.

“You’re right, I’m sorry,” he offers. “I could’ve been less rude.” The man tries his best at a genuine smile, but fails miserably. Nonetheless, it’s adorable to observe.

“‘S alright.” Carrie mumbles. She cannot take his eyes off of him, it’s insane. Now that they’re not fighting, it’s incredibly easy to get lost in his sharp features and plump lips.

“Harrison,” he extends a hand at her. Under normal circumstances, she’d think this extremely unprofessional, however her recent single status plays tricks on her mind and makes her take his hand in hers. “Harrison Ford. I own this place.” He’s proud, you can tell.

“Carrie Fisher.” The skin on his hand is rough, no doubt from working all day. It’s warm though and his scent of coffee and pastries is intoxicating.

Silence. His head nods as if asking her to go on.

“I’m a writer,” she tells him, her lips like a pink line on her face. “Obviously.” She laughs, motioning towards the computer and notebook. Charlotte smiles knowingly and turns around to leave. Funny, I forgot she was here, Carrie thinks.

“So I see,” Harrison laughs back, his eyes the tiniest bit crinkled. Their hands are still intertwined. We should let go . And so she does. Her hand falls to her lap slowly, never touching anything on the way. She keeps it there, unmoved, a token on of their meet-cute. “Well, best get to it then,” he smiles.

She nods and turns back around, facing her computer screen. “Nice to meet you, Harrison.” She tried his name for the first time, tentatively.

“Yes, nice,” he says it like he’s pondering the words. Then, he replies: “Nice to meet you too, Miss Fisher.”

“She smiled her best enigmatic smile at him and was gone again. Rudy watched the space where she had been for a brief moment, smiled to himself, and then was willingly reabsorbed into his car.”