#OH MAN OH BOY DO I LIVE FOR GIRL POWER EPISODES

[bengiyo]

Century of Love Ep 1 Stray Thoughts

Daou and Offroad are back on my screens. Pond Ponlawit is here. I’m ready.

Hey, Daou looks great.

Oh shit he can fight! The sound effects are killing me.

This woman is very pretty.

I really hope we see this little boy later on as a jaded caretaker of Daou’s character after decades of putting up with him.

This bullet-be-gone rock is so powerful.

Wow, this show is giving us the lore upfront. That’s refreshing.

Pond is playing a villain?!?

Bro, you ain’t get her no good shoes for running, or a proper change of clothes? Y’all gonna try to escape in her wedding dress?

Wow this guy speed ran ruining Vad’s life.

Damn, this Savant guy must really love Vad to give up the special stone for San.

100 years of chronic pain to find the one you love? I do love fantastical romance sometimes.

Thank you, show, for giving me adult Pao and then his memorial. I hope someone "does well in the interview" in this show.

It works really well that San is stuck on where Vaf died.

I know War Jirawat is probably having fun treating San like he's much older than him.

Oof, and he's fussing at people like an old man out of touch.

Wow. Very fucked up that he feels every wound he's ever healed from like this. At least they softened it by taking San's shirt off again, because it doesn't seem like he's built up any tolerance to it.

They were so sensible about protecting this stone. I'm now worried about how it inevitably gets stolen.

Goddamn how tall is Daou?? This girl San saved looked kinda tall.

Wow. Crashed into each other underneath a large red cloth.

Wow, Offroad is still so pretty.

A RED STRING!!!!!!!

I wonder who Vee lives with.

Oh my god is this the same store from Love in Translation?? I'm going to scream. I hope it's still a worker-owned cooperative.

Vee lives alone? Why the extra bed?

I do like the reaction shots from the goddess statue.

Wow, and now they're giving us a Vee shower scene. Hooray for us.

I like how flirty Vee feels. Haven't seen this from Offroad since Our Days.

WOW. FIRST EPISODE KISS??

Oh, that exhale sound was excellent. You could feel something being let go.

I see. It was just a dream. Still, I like them giving us that in the first episode!

Hey, so that was a really great first episode! We got all the backstory we needed, established the rules, set our time limit, and met a great cast of characters. I'm excited to see who Pond reincarnated as in this timeframe. There's a good mix of drama, comedy, action, and tragedy in this that I find really compelling. Everyone is also putting in constant effort into each scene. Also, Offroad has never been prettier, my goodness.

[mahoutoons]

the women of death note deserve better

so i just finished death note. i have Thoughts about the show. some good, some bad. its not the type of show i'd usually watch but there was something in it that kept me watching. but there was one aspect of the show that bothered me to no end, one that made me consider dropping the show more than once. and that's its treatment of its female characters.

now i know shonen isn't exactly known for writing women well. this isn't to say ALL shonen is like that, but the more popular ones definitely have this problem. the women are either sidelined, reduced to love interests, or aren't allowed to reach their full potential, and this can really be seen in the women of death note. for a show that prides itself on having complex, layered characters with depths that keep people talking two decades later, it sure does drop the ball when it comes to writing women. so here i'm gonna go through all the women of death note and how they were done dirty. keep in mind this is all referring to the anime, i haven't read the manga.

naomi misora

starting off with the one that pissed me off the most. naomi had me intrigued from the moment she first appeared on screen. she was a former fbi agent who left her job because her asshole fiance convinced her it was too dangerous, and then blew off her suggestions (which ultimately lead to his death which. el oh fucking el). she was able to piece together that kira could control how his victims die. she could add a lot to the story given that she previously worked with L. she could've been a part of the task force and would help them piece together clues that would pin down kira. does she do all that? LOL NOPE. the writers decided she was too powerful and killed her off within two episodes of her introduction. now i know this is death note and a lot of characters die. but naomi's death pissed me off the most. here was a woman who had so much potential and could solve the case within two episodes and she's killed off. oh but at least she stars in a spinoff novel half the fandom won't read! isn't that just GREAT? look how much we love women guys!

yeah all this time later and i'm still pissed off about how they did her. naomi bby you deserve so much better.

misa amane

OH BOY GET READY FOR A BIG ONE. so misa was actually the reason i wanted to watch death note because she's fucking gorgeous. i didn't have many expectations about how she'd be written considering this is a popular shonen, but even then i was disappointed. misa is the main female character of death note. she's presented as the second kira who has shinigami eyes, which gives her the power to see a person's name and lifespan by looking at their face. she was saved by a shinigami who was in love with her and got his notebook, and her current shinigami rem (more on her next) also has feelings for her. she worships kira because he killed her parents' murderer. she finds out light is kira because her shinigami eyes don't allow her to see the lifespan of a death note owner and as such asks him to make her his girlfriend.

misa misa misa. my gorgeous goth girl. you deserved to be written so much better. a second kira who has shinigami eyes? she could've been so cool. but the writers made 90% of her personality revolve around light and treated her as this dumb, impulsive girl who worships the ground light walks on. and light doesn't even treat her that well. he just uses her and takes his frustrations out on her. oh, and don't get me started on this bullshit

look, i get that misa is a killer and had to be restrained. but WAS THIS FETISHY CRAP NECESSARY?? WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THE FUCKING CROTCH STRAP?? when light was imprisoned he wasn't tied up like THIS. this is just another case of shonen authors being fucking weirdos with their female characters.

and in the end she kills herself because light dies. instead of letting her heal and live her life the author decides "welp, the man we based 90% of misa's character on is dead, time to kill her off too". just absolute bullshit. she deserved so SO much better.

rem

rem, my gorgeous butch shinigami. she became my favourite character when she was introduced. i was actually surprised by how direct they were about her feelings for misa. i'd seen bits and pieces of remisa before and i thought it'd be one of those ships the writers dance around but they explicitly had her say she has feelings for misa. i was so surprised and happy at that. but of course, this is a popular shonen so i shouldn't have had high expectations. my problem with how they treated rem comes in her death. she dies after killing watari and L to extend misa's lifespan. if a shinigami extends a human's lifespan they die. now, i'm not gonna say her death is an example of bury your gays because gelus, the male shinigami who saved misa before, met the same fate. however, i will say its very Interesting that the only canonically lesbian character who explicitly declares her feelings for another woman dies BECAUSE of those feelings. and then she isn't even acknowledged by misa which is so weird considering how much rem helped her. there's no scene of misa even mentioning rem or mourning her death. she dies without anyone knowing. i do enjoy the doomed yuri aspect of remisa but i really do wish they'd have misa at least acknowledge rem's death.

wedy

wedy, aka merrie kenwood, is a spy who joins the task force in the yotsuba arc. she's an expert at getting through security and is crucial in helping pin down higuchi as kira as she's the one who installs the bugs in yotsuba's meeting room and higuchi's cars. another cool female character with a lot of potential. you know what that means. TIME TO KILL HER OFF! wedy doesn't get much screentime and then dies within eight episodes of her introduction. which is slightly better than naomi. but still. i won't say this is also a case of misogynistic writing as aiber also dies. however, there is a pattern of having a female character with potential, not giving her enough spotlight, and killing her off shortly after her debut.

sayu yagami

sayu, my poor bbygirl sayu. she's introduced as light's bubbly little sister. in the timeskip she goes to college. her most significant role is getting kidnapped so her father could give up the death note to mello's men, making her the classic damsel in distress. and the poor girl is so traumatized that she's in a catatonic state and has to be wheelchair bound and taken care of by her mother. oh, and there's also that weird comment matsuda makes about her which... really dude? sayu isn't AS badly done as she doesn't play much of a role beyond her kidnapping. but still, she also deserves so much better.

kiyomi takada

i didn't think i'd be as pissed off about how they did a female character as i did about naomi and misa but BOY they proved me wrong. takada was light's girlfriend in college but she doesn't play a major role until the timeskip where she becomes kira's spokesperson. like misa, she worships kira. she's happy when she finds out light is kira and would do anything for him. so another woman who worships the ground light walks on. how original. she's supposed to be smart but they never demonstrate it. and need i mention that rivalry between her and misa? making two women catty to each other over a man who isn't even all that, how very typical. but what pissed me off the most was her kidnapping. that scene where mello asks her to take off all her clothes, and then she's left with nothing but a blanket? so fucking weird, i don't care if she's kira's spokesperson. this show has a history of treating its women weirdly and i'm not gonna believe this was anything but the author being weird once again. because what even was the point of that? and then she's killed by light to destroy all evidence. i'm saying this a lot at this point but takada also deserves better. she deserved to live up to her potential.

halle linder

out of everyone, halle is treated the best and that's not saying much. she's a double agent serving as takada's bodyguard and a spy for the spk. she's also the only woman besides sayu and sachiko who survived till the end and wasn't killed off. which i just realised. out of all the women in this show, only THREE survive till the end. isn't that something? i think my only issue with halle is the lack of spotlight. which is a theme with these women.

i thought of adding sachiko but she isn't much of a character. but there you have it. i'm not sure how bad it is in other popular shonen. but death note is full of women who had potential but the author squandered it for the sole reason that they're women. and its so jarring because people can write essays on light, L, near, mello, etc. even MATSUDA had more care put into him than any of these women. which is a damn shame. these women deserve to be in a show that actually cared about them, where they can actually live up to their potential.

i don't dislike death note. it definitely has its strong points. but the treatment of its women is something i take issue with, very strongly. if the author wasn't a weirdo and a nasty misogynist i feel like these women would've been the complex characters they deserved to be.

[yallemagne]

Finally posting my feelings on season 3 of X-Men: TAS. Ughhh.

Episode 1 & 2: Out of the Past

Looooove Gambit and Jubilee’s continued sibling relationship. 

Yuriko: “You killed my father!” Logan: “I didn’t!” Yuriko: “I’m gonna pretend I didn’t hear that.”

Don’t got much else to say other than ugh this leads into the space shenanigans and I haaaaate that. 

Episode 3, 4, 5, 6, 7: The Phoenix Saga

This saga is a drag but that doesn’t mean I didn’t get emotional when Jean and Scott parted. Seriously, when they kissed?? And Jean’s hair lit up like it was aflame? Fucking sexy as hell can I be them? These two are romance incarnate. 

Episode 8: No Mutant is an Island

Scott is so fucking done and I love that for him. He deserves a chance to go apeshit. Says he’s sick of playing “den mother”??? Oh my god. Speaking truth to power. Especially since Logan’s absence clearly marks that he’s already gone off to sulk, Scott deserves some sulk time for himself. 

THE ORPHANAGE. RUSTY!!! RUSTY COLLINS!! My darling Russell. 

“He’s just not used to the loving discipline a boy his age needs.” Kill this pervert. “After only two days I already love you like a son.” SCOTT KILL THIS PERVERT!!

Killgrave’s using these fucking kids as a scapegoat and the crimes they’re blamed for in his stead are what keep them from getting the help they need. I fucking hate this cunt. 

THEY DUMPED SCOTT IN THE POOL??? DOG?? What are y’all gonna do when a man is found drowned in your pool? Say “whoops guess he couldn't swim”??

I don’t like this Sarah chick. I’m sorry but like Killgrave is the most suspect guy ever, and she endangered the lives and futures of those children because “no one else would take them”. All that bullshit about her seeing the mutant kids as family? Girl, you got rid of them. She’s just gonna sell them to the highest bidder again because that’s what she did last time. 

I don't like that the message is "acceptance and tolerance is earned not forced" no, tolerance is NOT earned. Under no circumstances should a child be forced to EARN the right to live. Killgrave is wrong because he's a human trafficker using children to commit crimes. And obv his plan to groom the kids to become politicians would have never worked because his actions have gotten the kids in trouble with the authorities before, meaning they are distrusted by society because of HIM.

Episode 9: Obsession

I’m just gonna take a wild guess and say the Ming Dynasty scroll was planted to lure Archangel in. 

Warren is a fucking prick. Worthington is a dumb cunt and I hate him. “Deep down, he is still Warren Worthington!” Well, Warren Worthington is a bit of an angsty prick, so that ain’t saying much Rogue. Rogue and her sympathy for bitter blue bastards is gonna be her downfall. 

“Xavier was right, it is sentient! We can speak to it!” Uhh… or the ship just has Siri, McCoy. 

“Ship, you are a work of art.” “Thank you, Henry McCoy. You have no idea what a pleasure it is to interface with someone who appreciates the subtleties of my programming.”  Okay damn. I stand corrected. And Hank is about to wine and dine a ship. Jioegpoi Hank getting shocked for attempting to hack the ship and the ship apologizing. Wolverine and Cyclops are just standing there like “why are we here playing voyeur to this weird shit?”

I knew it, the scroll was planted. I fucking called it.

They need to stop giving Hank compelling love interests and then getting rid of them by the end of the episode. 

THEY SHOT APOCALYPSE INTO SPACE LIKE KARS. 

Episode 10: Longshot

Logan teaching Jubilee to drive!!! And he’s wearing a fuckin’ cowboy hat and a bolo tie. Why is he dressed for the rodeo? And he’s just such a dad for the rest of the episode, he recognizes Jubilee’s crush on Longshot and IMMEDIATELY goes into Dad Mode. 

“Bad doggie! No biscuit. We got leash laws in this town, mutt.” I fucking Love Wolverine. 

“Allowing me to scan his mind must be Longshot’s decision.” We love a king who respects consent. 

I fucking love Domo’s nicknames for Mojo. 

Yeah, I think I love Longshot. And I think most of the reason is just that I’ve read Exiles but ya know. He really is a heartthrob. He’s cliché but it’s a fun cliché. 

Honourable mention: that ram guy who threw away his gun to pull out a knife. 

Jubilee outfit without the coat is cute. Lol but they kept accidentally animating her with the coat on. 

Episode 11: Cold Comfort

BOBBYYYYY. Gay boy what are you doing here? Lol Bobby was the golden child, that much is obvious. At the same time he’s like “I was never good enough for you!” Dude Xavier let you get away with everything and that bred resentment in your teammates. 

Scott’s been wearing a bomber jacket recently and it just makes me miss Morph more

“What’s with those two? I’ve never seen the Professor so angry.”Daddy issues. “It’s a surrogate father-son dynamic with unresolved issues of dominance.” Wow damn I was right. 

Bobby: *insults Scott* Logan: *unsheathes claws* “Only I can call Cyke a goody goody.”

Jubilee looking up the records <333

FORGE???

QUICKSILVEr????

…Havok? oh gee.

Love Logan calling out that the government is employing mutants to police mutants. Forge says they're helping but like... Jaguars. Faces.

WHAT THE FUCK POLARIS. Polaris you absolute piece. “You wouldn’t have supported my decision so we faked my disappearance.” Who does that? Imagine needing to have absolutely no pushback in your decision-making, so to avoid having an argument with your boyfriend you fake your own kidnapping and start dating someone else without ever breaking up with the first guy. I wouldn’t hold it against her if it were just a simple misunderstanding, like if she left a note but he thought she wrote it under duress, but she purposely led him to believe that she needed to be rescued. 

They need to stop introducing characters that could be permanent additions to the team and then squandering that.

Episode 12 & 13: Savage Land, Strange Heart

Who is this chicken lady? I can’t take her seriously, she looks like a chicken. 

Rogue and Storm are lowkey dating and I love it. 

NO ONE KNOWS HOW TO CLOSE THEIR EYES. Who knows? Maybe it isn’t as simple as closing your eyes or looking away… but then why have Sauron repeat the phrase “look into my eyes” if you don’t actually have to look for him to control you? It’s stupid. 

“Well, next time Storm is kidnapped, I’ll make sure they take her someplace nice.”

The Savage Lands are fucking boring oh my god. 

I’m guessing… Sinister was in the soil when they last left… they’re saying Garokk is in the soil… hmm?? I’m probably wrong tho��� it actually is just Garokk, that’s boring.

WOLVERINE TACKLING AND PETTING ZABU!! Fucking adorable.

Episode 14, 15, 16, 17: The Dark Phoenix

This whole saga gave me the ick. It made me sick to watch. It’s is just a very disgusting storyline. First, Phoenix invalidates Jean’s free will, then the motherfuckin’ Rape Syndicate drops in and invalidates Phoenix’s free will. It’s just very gross and I felt like I was playing voyeur to some gross man’s fantasy. OH WAIT I literally fucking was because of that creep character I refuse to remember the name of.

“Ohoho! Looks like you’ve been having fun without me! Where’s the Cajun?” kinky

Who the fuck are these silk-stocking wearing hoes? “Tradition demands that this power be wielded by us” Ah, so they’re white supremacists. 

Every woman wants a piece of Scott. Callisto wanted a piece, Dazzler wanted a piece, The Phoenix is staying in Jean’s body because she wants a piece. “Dark pleasure of destruction” Fancy words for saying you want to peg that man. 

KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF OF HER. GET A JOB. STOP FUCKING TOUCHING HER YOU CREEP. I scream. They do not listen. But hahahaha Scott’s beautiful eyes broke her out of the creep’s rape fantasy. 

DAZZLER YOU PIECE. I know it’s hard to resist Scott’s charms but you do NOT spring a kiss on a man. Literally this whole thing is caused by people not respecting consent. The only reason Scott and Jean’s psychic rapport was broken was because Dazzler couldn’t fucking keep her hands to herself. And it's SOOO forced bc he could have just sent Gambit to play bodyguard.

These guys are fucking governing Genosha in ’97. Whose bright idea was it to put the Rape Syndicate in charge of a sovereign nation?

“I know what you’re thinking, bub. Question is: “Can I get Wolverine before he turns me into shish kabob with his claws?” Well bub, seeing as these claws are adamantium: the strongest metal known and can slice through vanadium steel like hot butter, you gotta ask yourself: “Do I feel lucky?””

“Lousy year.” *drops wine bottle on man’s dick*

I just love unhinged Wolverine quotes.

“I need no help from a woman to destroy the X-Men.” What a surprise. The head creep is a misogynist. Question: if Shaw can absorb any energy, can he absorb the energy of me ripping his spinal cord from his back? Asking for a friend.

Just when I think it’s over this damn saga still won’t end. Lilandra I thought I was done with you, woman. You come back into my life to fridge Jean Grey a second time, you piece. 

Scott/Jean has captured my mind and soul. They’re perfect. I love them so much. 

Episode 18: Orphan’s End

What an on-the-nose title for an episode where Cyclops learns his father is alive. Oh by the way that was mentioned before, his father is a space pirate. 

Cyclops mockingly calling Corsair “dad” fuels me. Let him tear his father a new one. 

Corsair says that if he’d known his children were alive nothing could have stopped him from coming back. Girly you never even looked, deadbeat. Just assumed your sons were dead for convenience, motherfucker. 

Episode 19: Love in Vain

We need a codeword for when Rogue gets dragged into some bullshit by toxic people from her past. Girl has had too much. Cody gave me bad vibes from the beginning. 

The fact that they defeat the Brood by talking to their sentient fish space ship? Two for two on sentient ships saving the day this season.  

Logan trying to comfort Rogue but her gravitating toward Gambit, the one whose affections she spurned going after the one that got away… I just got a lotta feelings, okay?

Season 1

Season 2

[demonslayedher]

Things that flew through my mind while watching this episode:

--For being called "Thank-you, Tokito-kun," Tokito-kun sure isn't in this episode much. Kotetsu-kun does not address Seaweed-Head with '-kun,' he addresses him with '-san.' Oyakata-sama addresses him simply as "Muichiro" in the flashback. Actually, I checked, and only Tanjiro ever calls him that. Is this going to be something Tanjiro hears and thanks him for later? Or has this whole series just been brief chapters in "The Legend of Zenitsu" and that is what Zenitsu titled it?

--Kotetsu-kun is having a bit of a weird night anyway. Brave boy--who, we mustn't forget, is a child who has every reason to feel overwhelmed--went off to get help so that Haganezuka's sword polishing would not be interrupted, and then he fought and nearly got eaten by a demon fish but stayed as strong as he could the whole time. But then when Muichiro starts carrying him and blasting forward at the speed of Pillar, I love that he's screaming his head off. I want a modern day AU of these two hanging out at an amusement park and Muichiro drags him on the big rollercoasters.

--And hey, look, another mention of how important it is not to interrupt that sword polishing process. You want that sword to get ruined, Tokito-kun? Remember that after all the effort you soon go through to protect Haganezuka-san. TO PROTECT THAT SWORD.

--Gonna right ahead to the end of the episode here and mention how Mitsuri is not at all like, "oh no, that's really, really bad" (which it is, that's why Gyokko targeted it), but "okay, watch out, I'm gonna do my best!" This is a girl who has found her true calling. She should give career advice. Does your career make your heart squeeze with excitement even in the tightest pinch?

--As a point of interesting comparison I'm going to come back to, Mitsuri's confidence is well-placed. She runs into situations that overwhelm her and she lacked confidence when trying to learn a Breath she wasn't suited for, but we never see her experience Pillar Imposter Syndrome. Besides just being extremely physically capable, she has picked up battle experience and it has become a part of her. This battle sense serves her very well. On the other hand, we have Muichiro who is not endowed with the same strength, but his analytical abilities are what make him a Pillar quality genius even before he gains much experience.

--Which brings me to Tanjiro, Nezuko, and Genya, the true stars of this episode.

--Look at these three, legit holding their own against Upper Moon Four. It is a wonder none of them died already. Ok, we have good reasons for why Nezuko and Genya haven't, but in Tanjiro's case, this is exactly what Mitsuri was talking about in episode 1 about how valuable Tanjiro's experience against Upper Moon Six was. Tanjiro has had a excellent gut for battle ever since throwing his axe in the air at Giyuu, and he's always been one to analyze a battle as he's swept up in it. But this is not the same Tanjiro who fought Kyogai! He is able to look for openings and weaknesses in totally different ways so that he can stay calm and relatively in control when fighting one-on-one with Urogi (using Urogi to fly back, now that deserves some flamboyant applause), and his battle senses have gotten strong enough to tell him that he might be able to protect himself against a demon's attack if he had the demon's own cells as a shield.

--Also, all those jokes about attacking Sailor Moon while she is transforming, or Goku while he's screaming and powering up? That is exactly what Urogi is going through.

--Genya, man, you might be coping with Repetitive Action, but you are living on spite.

--Now if only Rengoku could have learned a thing or two about not dying from gaping chest wounds

--Genya, since he fights with desperation, does not get many moments to look cool (badass, sure, but not cool-like-a-cucumber cool). That makes it's so nice that he got to strike that sword and glock pose while delivering the "I'm Shinazugawa Genya--that's the name of the guy who is gonna kill you!" line.

--Which means Genya just had the most Sailor Moon moment of this whole series.

--Sekido has good reason to be ticked off with his body-mates lolly-gagging instead of finishing the demon slayers off. After all, Muzan wants the whole village wiped out (and Gyokko is the only one getting any work done, with all four parts of Hantengu being wrapped up with these three slayers!). Aizetsu is like someone watching an animal die for the pure sadness of it. Aizetsu isn't exactly kind, though he is the odd one out among his body-mates, and I would indeed find it very, very funny if he could be convinced to befriend the sad humans (maybe out of getting some protection from Sekido). Sekido would be so pissed off about missing a critical piece of a more reasonable form like Zouhakuten, and Muzan would be pissed off as he gets this report from Sekido while Urogi and Karaku are running/flying amok.

--While I, being someone who has loved tengu for many years, appreciate the various tengu inspired elements in each of the four Ki-Do-Ai-Raku demons, I have always had trouble seeing it in Aizetsu. This is also why he seems like the odd one out to me. It's like, ah, yes, Sekido with the shakujo staff, Karaku with the bonten-kesa stole and hauchiwa fan, Urogi having the bird-like qualities of a karasu-tengu, and Aizetsu in a tracksuit.

--Instead of "half-tengu" wouldn't Hantengu's name make more sense as "quarter-tengu"?

--It's very funny that Hantengu's alter-egos all portray themselves on the side of spiritual mastery (by way of the tengu/Shugenja symbolism, followed by Buddhism-informed deity iconography, all of which is a whole different tangent of its own). Hantengu's own irony is too big to contain in one tiny body. But also, two crossovers I want to see, so if anybody draws them, please tag me: Hantengu & Co. as Father & Co. from Full Metal Alchemist, and Hantengu & Co. as the stars of Inside Out.

--I'll bet Sekido, as part of his anger-management in spiritual mastery, has agreed to stand by and give his body-mates a chance.

--Karaku acts like an overly pushy boyfriend. Learn from Nezuko, everyone. If a guy is ever giving you a hard time like that, kick his head off.

--Karaku wasn't himself in a position to be able to do much more, but his biggest mistake was giving Nezuko her opening. That whole series of moves she did there--well-placed and powerful kick, sacrificing an arm that'll quickly grow back anyway, throwing blood in Karaku's newly recovered face, and then using her fire as a distraction to reorient and physically overpower Karaku by twisting his arm off to perfectly use his hauchiwa against him, and then turn around ready to use it against Sekido--brilliant.

--Nezuko is not the same demon kicking around and getting her leg blown off by a Taisho soccer ball. She's also not the same demon desperately thrashing around a flesh-filled train. This isn't even the same demon curb-stomping Daki; she has mastery of this state now. Nezuko has peaked here with her battle techniques.

--...especially because this is last night she ever uses her demon abilities

--But!! Thinking ahead to Tamayo's analysis, Nezuko has been prioritizing other developments over reattaining her self-awareness, leaving her mind in a childlike state while she gains abilities closer and closer to those of Upper Moons, and finally masters the sun. However, Nezuko has also shown leaps and bounds in her awareness as well. Just think! What if we had a Nezuko as analytical as her brother this whole time? In all that time Tanjiro was asleep, perhaps Nezuko was also asleep, trying to attain mastery over herself so as to prevent another near mishap? And this gave her more ability to think in battle, as opposed to just attacking with her gut instinct? Nezuko is perhaps just acting on instinct when landing that series of moves on Karaku, but her instincts have gotten really sharp for how to save Tanjiro multiple times in this battle, and for using her blood to heat the sword, even if her idea was just "I'm stuck, take my fire and go." Whatever the case, baby does more than just slash and kick now and I'm so proud of her!

[linghxr]

My spring 2024 cdrama/cmovie/cvariety updates

I can't believe it's already been over 6 months since my last watching updates post! I've been watching more movies, and I'll also mention a couple variety shows, so it's not just cdramas.

Shows/series:

Some of these were mentioned as “currently watching” in my previous post.

《不良执念清除师》 Oh No! Here Comes Trouble A young man learns to use his supernatural calligraphy powers to help strange beings, with help from his frenemy and a young police officer. This show was like a breath of fresh air and very humorous. That being said, it was difficult to follow all the storylines. If you're going to watch it, I think you should binge it if possible. Content warning: Death, gore

《此时此刻》 At the Moment An anthology of quirky pandemic love stories, not all with happy endings. It's kind of like Love Actually in that the characters are connected across stories. Initially I didn't plan to watch because of the pandemic through line—I thought it would bum me out. But it didn't, actually. My favorite episode was Head of the Family. Content warning: Unhealthy relationships, sex and nudity

《隐秘的角落》 The Bad Kids Three kids accidentally film a murder and try to blackmail the killer, resulting in devastating consequences. I felt the first half of this show was more captivating than the second half—the second half went a bit overboard IMO. Apparently the original novel is way darker so…! But I still recommend it wholeheartedly. Content warning: Death and violence (but not graphic)

《沉默的真相》 The Long Night The murder of a disgraced prosecutor seems like an open-and-shut case, but his past reveals a much more complicated story. This show masterfully weaves together three different timelines. I was so confused after the first episode, but it all made sense in the end. I don't recommend binge watching it—I regretted doing so. Content warning: Violence, death, sexual assault

《双镜》 Couple of Mirrors A young woman's personal and professional lives are turned upside down, and she befriends a mysterious woman with a dark past. You have to suspend your disbelief to enjoy this show. There was a ridiculous number of car accidents! It's a GL drama, but if I hadn't know that, I don't think I would have noticed until the end. Content warning: Death, violence

Variety/reality:

《披荆斩棘的哥哥》 Call Me by Fire In the past I didn't include variety shows, but this time I thought why not? I finally finished all 3 seasons of this show, the male spinoff of 《乘风破浪的姐姐》 Sisters Who Make Waves. It's similar to an idol survival show, but instead of trainees, the contestants are established celebrities. The sets are always amazing, and I might have enjoyed this show more than 《乘风破浪》 honestly!

Movies:

《家庭简史》 Brief History of a Family The description of this movie sounded dull, but I ended up enjoying it a lot! I've seen reviews compare it to Parasite and Saltburn. There is definitely some similarity–it's about a well-off family that takes in a mysterious, quiet boy–but the takeaway of this film is very different. It leaves a lot of room for ambiguity.

《流浪地球》 The Wandering Earth After being on my watchlist for years, I finally got around to seeing this movie. I knew the basic premise: humanity bands together to move Earth away from the expanding sun. I wasn't expecting that it would focus on one family, which gave the movie a more personal feel. I enjoyed it despite not being a huge sci-fi person. Content warning: Death

《美国女孩》 American Girl A family moves back to Taiwan for their mother's cancer treatment after several years in the US, and the eldest daughter struggles to adapt. It's set during the SARS outbreak, but I don't remember that being very prominent. This movie was quite bleak and bummed me out. And I found the ending rather abrupt. It wasn't for me I think. Content warning: Illness, disease outbreak

《你好，李焕英》 Hi, Mom This movie was super popular when it came out. It's about a woman who gets transported back in time and meets her mother (who is young and childless at this point). At first I was confused about where the movie was going—it didn't seem to be building to much. But it had a heartwarming and touching ending. Content warning: Death

《周处除三害》 The Pig, The Snake and The Pigeon After seeing a lot of buzz about this movie online, I had to check it out. It follows a terminally ill hitman who learns he is the third most wanted criminal in Taiwan and decides to kill the two criminals ranking above him. Despite this, the main character is actually pretty likable. I enjoyed the movie despite the violence. Content warning: Excessive violence, death, sexual assault

Currently watching:

《火星情报局》 Mars Intelligence Agency This is a variety show. The cast consists of celebrities who take turns telling funny stories and making jokes. I started watching because my favorite singer 薛之谦 is a cast member. I was unsure about the concept at first, but honestly it's really entertaining!

《摩天大楼》 A Murderous Affair in Horizon Tower I finally started this show, which has been on my watchlist for a while. I'm only 2 episodes in—so far it's mostly been about the past of the titular murder victim. I'm not yet sure what direction the show will go in, but I'm excited to find out.

Abandoning:

《你的孩子不是你的孩子》 On Children I got through 3 out of 5 episodes before abandoning this show. Each episode is the length of a movie, so they drag on. But I totally understand why episode 2, Child of the Cat, was nominated for and won so many awards. The acting was really strong.

《汉化日记》 God Troubles Me I wanted to try watching a 动画, but after a few episodes, I wasn't feeling this one. Each episode is quite short, so it's an easy watch. I think it just wasn't for me.

On my watchlist:

《漫长的季节》 The Long Season

《尘封十三载》 Thirteen Years of Dust

I'm trying to be better about content warnings. But please note, I only included them for things I finished watching, not things I'm currently watching or abandoning.

[multifandombullshitbabes]

Random Merlin Rewatch: Where a random number generator gives me a season and an episode from BBC Merlin; and then I comment on it as I go.

Today's episode: Season 1 Episode 6 - A Remedy to Cure all Ills

Before I start, let me just say, I'm really happy I'm getting to rewatch the earlier seasons. Of course the next random episode might be literally season 5 or something, but it's great that it hasn't happened yet.

Let's fucking start bitches

Not the wiggly evil fingers just a few seconds in.

Damn boy you got some dirty ass nails, wash your hands.

MORGWEN MY BELOVEDS!!!! Also the way Gwen looked at Morgana after she asked who'd she want the flowers to be from. Girl looked ready to risk it ALL, let me put a screenshot actually.

OUGHHHH the brainrot is real with these two

LIKE??????? GWEN'S THIRSTY (me too)

Alright girls, enough yearning please

Ugh, I hate the little sound the bug made when it dropped from the flower. Butthole clenched in digust.

Oh thank god they DON'T show it literally entering her ear. That would've been so gross.

LETS GO INTROOOOOO

Oh Gwen looks BEAUTIFUL in that yellow color. It does everything for her!!

"She's all but dead, Merlin." JESUS FUCKING CHRIST GAIUS

Most suspicious ruse of all time. "Oh, i have a cure for all ills. And also I know the king's ward is very sick. But anyways, I'll be at the inn :)." Bitch.

"But I'm not worried." me when I lie. Merlin is so bad at lying, jesus fuck

Merlin sits down to stop pacing. Arthur gets up and starts pacing. Two sides of the same coin or whatever.

Underrated Arthur shirt is the purplish one he wears in the scene where he begs Uther n Gaius to hear the strange man out. That color looks good on him. It might be his red shirt but in a weird lighting?? I can't be sure.

I really like when Gaius gets to talk all medical considering how limited the medicine world was at the time. It's really really cool, I love seeing this insight into what was possibly like to be a physician at the time. I don't of this happens much in the show.

Arthur really is so trusting when it comes to his loved ones. Of course he's not at fault, like he said what do they have to lose at this point, honestly I've done the same. It's just. Heartbreaking to notice that trait knowing what comes next.

"Science is knowledge." Merlin is such a nerd, I love him.

Oh, not Gaius and Edwin having a lying competition over here. There's a better term for it, but whatever.

Gwen is SO FUCKING GORGEOUS but girl please that's a fucking sorcerer, go AWAY be SAFE. She's so smart though. Immediately knew something was off. He tries to be all "She may die :(." to get her to be worried and not suspicious, but it literally doesn't work. She leaves the room but not because she thinks he's got Morgana's best interests at heart. She knows something is wrong. She also knows she holds no power. And on the chance that he is right and Morgana dies, she'd never forgive herself.

The fucking lying back and forth between Gaius and Edwin. Like. From the outside, it sounds like a perfectly normal convo. But they both know it isn't. And WE know it isn't 'cause we know Edwin's full of shit.

Interesting how Arthur isn't seated but Uther and Morgana are.

Who the fuck knocks on someone's door, doesn't hear an answer, and then just let's themselves in?? I'm sorry, if you're a stranger, I'm not doing that. The fuck's wrong with you Merlin, you nosy boy??

It is so sickening that these villains of the week have views that we can agree with. Yes, magic is a gift and can be a force for good, you're right! But it's because of Uther and his oppression that they turn bitter and ruthless and vindictive. And yes, you do have to eliminate those who are like Uther because they will only propagate the same corrupted and repressive beliefs. The problem, the layers, is that some of those people are actually very much capable of understanding the very fundamental logic that "Sorcerers deserve too live in freedom" but they're so filled with fear and propaganda of the contrary that it's so hard to get out of it. And that's why, if they killed Uther with magic, Arthur would hate magic even more (just like it happens in canon), which would then just repeat the cycle, etc etc. You need to uproot the system, but killing everybody is not the answer; but also having to teach such a fundamental thing, that certain humans deserve basic rights, is such a painful thing to teach, and the oppressed does not have the obligation to do so. But then the cycle just repeats and repeats and it's SHIT. Anyways.

It's so funny that in season 1 they hadn't figured out the cgi for the golden eyes so they just. simply don't show it.

The things Edwin say are like. Well-meaning. But there's just this off vibe that the most intelligent characters (Gaius, Gwen, Merlin) can just. pick up. And even though Merlin really likes what Edwin is saying, there's just something telling him... it's wrong.

Uther, of course, would never even believe anyone would just lie so blatantly and manipulate him like this because he thinks himself very intelligent; which is why he's falling for everythinggg that Edwin says. But, credit where credit's due, Edwin is an excellent liar.

Gaius wears the most cunty ring on his pinky finger, hello?

I want that ring bro.

Oop, not Gaius having his cowardice and betrayal shoved right in his face. I get it, you wanted safety. But there's consequences to your actions. And I know Gaius feels so guilty about all his friends that died at the stake while he remained safe and sound.

If Gaius would've left in this episode, replaced by Edwin, I bet Morgana would've felt so guilty. In her mind, her illness is what caused him to leave. Gaius truly was there for Morgana and Arthur in ways Uther simply could not.

OOP Gaius and Kilgarrah meeting!!!!!!!! I forgot this happened lmao

Gaius got a little taste of how infuriating the dragon is.

Wait, Gaius was employed for Arthur's birth? That's so interesting. He probably already lived in Camelot but he's been a court physician for 20 years. He was already quite old by then.

It's the way that Gaius is just. Ready to throw his whole life away to make sure Merlin is safe and sound. That's his fucking son, bro!!!

What the actual fuck, they're gonna make me cry :(((( Gaius called Merlin a blessing and his son, I can't.

THEY CAN'T DO THIS TO MEEEEEEE IM GONNA CRY

Gwen is so iconic, speak the fucking truth girl.

THAT ICONIC GWEN LINE YESSSSSSSSSS QUEENNNN

Not Gaius with his lil blanket and lil fire. He looks so smol, it's so funny.

Edwin could've waited a lil bit before going all murder on Uther. That just looks suspicious as fuck ngl.

GAIUS GETTING BLOWN BACK SHOULD'NT BE SO FUNNY BUT--

I wonder how Arthur knew that his father was ill. It means he went into his room, but why? Did he have some feeling about Edwin? About Gaius leaving? Was it some courtly concern? I'm assuming no one else would have the privilege of seeing Uther at night except for his son and ward so.

Yes, Merlin, just stare at the floating axe that's being controlled by the evil sorcerer right in front of you, you're so smart. Also the slow-mo is so goofy.

It's interesting that they shot both Merlin and Edwin's eyes up-close when they did magic, Merlin to do the golden eye effect, but for Edwin it seems that his pupils just change size. I wonder if not all sorcerers have their eyes glow, if it depends on the magic. Edwin is using dark magic, could it be that? That's interesting, imo. Dark magic equals no golden eyes. Kinda fun.

Violent ass death for Edwin, damn. Axe to head, bitchass

Oh it must be so weird for Merlin to be touching Uther like that. Like that's intimate as shit.

So cuteeee Gaius calling Merlin a genius, they're adorable. He's so proud. That was a feat, though, just pure improv and luck. Merlin is still a noob at controlled magic so this was really damn good.

Love that it's so canon that Gaius potions taste like fucking ASS. Uther's face, lmao.

Interesting that Uther asked if Gaius remembered his friends that burned at the pyre, and Gaius answers "All of them." and Uther doesn't even comment. As bonkers as it sounds, they truly are friends in some capacities. I wonder if Gaius could make Uther change his mind. Not Morgana or Arthur, but Gaius. But he made the choice to abandon magic, Uther presumed because Gaius understood its dangers, but if he were to find out that actually Gaius doesn't agree, I wonder what Uther would think about that. Like a genuine and open convo about it. I think he'd just arrest Gaius for it, but I don't know. I think there's at least some reality where he gives it some more thought. But I don't know if he'd ever repel the ban, more because he'd have to admit that he was wrong, and admitting you're wrong is also accepting and processing all the shit you did for that wrong thing, and I just think Uther is too cowardly to do so. He knows it would break his mind to truly process all the pain and horror he's caused; so no matter his inner philosophies, he'll never repel the ban, because the damage has been done, and he'd rather live like that than start anew in the new reality where he's wrong.

"In the fight against magic, you are the one person I can trust." yet again. Gaius going against this? Uther can't fathom it. He's so confident that Gaius is 100% on his side.

Arthur smiling at Gaius, awww.

Two pretty bestfriends. No wonder half the kingdom wants to fuck them both. Also what the fuck is a "freeman"??? Genuinely, what is it??

And that is it. Loved it, of course.

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

Hi hello I watched all of carmilla in a weekend when I was 17 because a student teacher who in retrospect I had a bit of a crush on mentioned that she knew one of the actresses. also I am pretty invested in all your recent vampire stuff because I watched iwtv in 2 days last week because your edit intrigued me

oh hiiii 🫶 thank you for indulging me. thats so cool that you watched iwtv! did it live up to the expectation?

i also watched carmilla at 17! or like, 17-19. i found it when s2 had just started and followed it to the end. did something permanent to my brain but i think it was a good thing. on rewatch now im like, i was right to like this. like it's a solid show, it's good. it has its flaws obviously but it's well written, the emotional moments still get me, i can see why i liked it and i still like it now even when it's not anymore, you know, meeting every need that baby gay me didnt even know they had

what it doesnt reaallyy do though - i dont remember if i posted abt this or if i left it in my drafts but - is explore vampirism as a concept. their subject matter is more lesbianism than vampirism. which is great! thats what they wanted to do and they did it and it's very good. but reading interview with the vampire the book rn im realising how much potential vampires have to be metaphors for like so many things and i started wondering like 'wait, did carmilla just not really engage with it or did it all go over my head'. but it just didnt really engage with it all that much. which again is fine bc that wasnt what they were doing. im glad they were more about the lesbianism than the vampirism

but there's this interesting difference in framing, because in iwtv they keep calling armand 'ancient' right? and emphasising how old he is. and he's like 500? and i was like 'wait isnt carmilla like 400?'. she isnt, shes 340, but still, thats getting there, you know? and we know quite a lot about her history, but kind of just the Big Events. when she was turned, the events of the novella, coffin of blood, silas. thats sort of what we know. but none of the long lonely slog of history day to day you know? with armand i feel like we can really feel how much time everything takes. how every one of those years is made up of single days. with carmilla i dont feel that as much. i keep kind of thinking about daniel, when louis calls him a boy in the first episode, saying "im an old man, with all the triggers that come with it"

because carmilla might look 18 (or mid twenties at this point) but she has lived all that time. shes also seen her native land be claimed by like a succession of ruling powers, right? like armand. shes been buried alive, like louis. when lestat is born, shes already 80 years old, shes lived a whole human lifetime, and the entire adult part of it shes been a vampire. shes lived through 1680-1870 being a lure. i compared her to abigail hobbs in some tags on a post, i dont know if youre familiar with hannibal the tv show, but i do also kinda keep thinking about that comparison

if youre not familiar, in the first episode of hannibal the murderer of the week is this guy garrett jacob hobbs who kills and cannibalises girls who resemble his daughter. and later on it turns out she was made to be his lure. like they'd go places and he'd sent her to the victims to make friends and maybe get them back to their home or smth. not sure if they specified all the details. but that's what carmilla did for mother. and in s2 we hear from mattie that while every couple of decades carmilla had to lure victims for the fish god, she also seemed to just enjoy humans between those times, right? like the doctor, gets lonely, gets a new companion. but we've only sort of got mattie's mocking word for it ("dont eat him, hes a poet! or her, shes got such a wonderful voice. or that one, shes just too pretty to ruin"), we don't know exactly from carmilla's point of view what she was doing or why. if mattie's talking about stuff that happened after the blood coffin, 1950-now, then i think it's a fair assumption based on what carmilla says in the s1 sock puppet show that after she'd figured out what the real situation was and what her role in it was, when she'd started trying to save girls from being sacrificed, that she mightve been doing the same trying to save people from becoming mattie's victims. it's probably more likely that she was just trying to find excuses to stop mattie from sucking someone dry rather than actually having like an aesthetic based morality. but it might be a bit of both. im still trying to figure out what her philosophy actually is, like i dont know what existentialism actually means ghkfjghkj but i will

i also found it pretty striking in the movie when shes turning back into a vampire she says like "this was supposed to be done, you know? the blood lust, the self-loathing, the sleeping tied to a chair in my own bedroom". thats what defines her vampirism, wanting blood and hating yourself for it (the third part is a joke/reference to s1 but also i think meaningful for how she sees her relationship with laura when she IS a vampire. little bit of that 'she will reject me for my monstrousness' shining through). and thats what defines vampirism for lots of vampires across the genre obviously, but i dont know, it struck me. we dont get a lot from carmilla's pov, we know a fair amount about her, but the story is always told through laura. we get laura's diaries, but just snippets here and there from carmilla, what shes thinking, how shes feeling

and i love that shes a philosopher. i love that thats how she seems to try and find something to hold onto, in a world that kind of moves around her, having been murdered, kidnapped, turned and groomed to be a lure on the cusp of adulthood, never having been properly loved (the relationship with her father wasnt good she says in s3, and her mortal mother i dont think has ever been mentioned (like laura's)). the only good relationship she seems to have had for the better part of 3 centuries seems to have been mattie, and mattie seems to love being a vampire. i can imagine carmilla just sort of going along with anything mattie wants to do just because shes so desperate for that friendship. not like, against her will necessarily really. but more like, she hasnt even had the space to develop her own will, you know? and philosophy lets you do that. philosophy gives you frameworks to understand the world and to develop your own opinions on it. and by the 21st century she seems to have developed those opinions, she has a sense of her own values, but shes also still stuck in that same situation. shes jaded and cynical in the face of laura's optimism and strong moral code a lot of the time in s1 because she feels probably pretty powerless. like she does what she can to save some girls but at the end of the day shes scared of her mother and she has nowhere else to go really, right?

i like how she grapples with that over the course of the series, in tandem with laura grappling with her black and white morality. she sort of jumps ship from her mother to laura bc theyve fallen in love, but then laura still stuck in her hero thinking refuses to see her monstrous side. not literally bc i think the biological vampirism never seemed to be a problem for laura, but morally. the having murdered. carmilla needs laura to see that and love her while seeing it bc the last girl she loved rejected her for being a vampire.

but you see her kind of swing back and forth in s2. she softens first with laura but then they break up and she leans back hard into the sarcastic cynic defense mechanisms, leans hard into "im a monster, dont expect heroism from me". but thats like, it's sort of learned helplessness i think. it's powerlessness, resignation. bc morally shes not a monster. maybe she doesnt have as strong a drive to help other people as laura does and is a little more selfishly hedonistic in that she just wants to enjoy her/their life, but she doesnt hurt people for fun, she never has. she just sort of didnt have another option for a Really long time. so she pretends she doesnt care. "im a vampire, this is what i do, this is who i am". but clearly from the way she talks about it when she turns back into one, she doesnt enjoy it

and i like how she goes even further in s3, where she starts swinging even more to the heroic side, bc she sees hope. shes like "wow if we kill my mother, i'd be free". theres hope and she becomes like a lot more active. and shes like that at the start of the movie too, a lot happier, a lot more relaxed, and then vampirism is back and bam depression gfhgkjh like shes immediately more gloomy, ashamed of her past and her self, retreats into herself

sorry i just took this as an opportunity to dump all the carmilla thoughts floating in my head on you. you didnt ask fhkghgjh consider this an open invitation to you or anyone else to come talk to me about carmilla

[respectthepetty]

Naughty Babe, who is Le Ling?!

I watched the Naughty Babe finale and had no idea who Le Ling was; therefore, I have to be annoyingly cringe about it, but before I begin, let me just say that Max looked delicious the entire eight episodes.

But also, this Daddy did too! And I'm not talking about Aon. No! Yi's father has been looking like an entire five-course meal every single time he appeared on the screen. This is the type of father that if your partner was acting up, forget about effing the friends. EFF THE DADDY! Sir, why are you looking so scrumdiliumcious? Is it all that money? Or is it the power? Perhaps it's you in red. Rawr!

Hand over heart, this entire family could get it. Mom included.

I gotta focus! The kids were in the playroom planning shenanigans.

This is a boy who gets it. I've always loved that his name is Syn because he sins but prays about it. Repents while he is doing it but still does it. Makes his sinful peeps pray too for good measure. We're not going to hell on his watch!

Lian not stopping Diao is funny because all throughout Cutie Pie, Yi would call Lian and be like, "your boy's at the club, but I'm only here to collect my man who I have 24-hour surveillance on, so sucks to be your trusting ass, but I'm built different, so I hope you get to your man on time before some serious shit goes down. Toodles!" These two are the pettiest friends, and I love my ghost ship.

POPPY! Where were you all season?! Hopefully filming Love Puzzle, so I can see you kiss a homie, but I was glad to see the secretaries in love and as chaotic as ever . . . in red.

Look at that face! That is a man trying to get all these heathens into the next life, YET THEY WON'T WORK WITH HIM! I guess the honeymoon will be in hell, Nuer!

This dog looked adorable, in red. So glad Domundi switched it out from the Cutie Pie dog. A+ casting choice.

This boat showing up was unnecessary! Was this supposed to be a rainbow moment because a high speed boat thingy coming out of nowhere was not the move?!

This blue color was even depressing Diao out. Get some yellow or orange back on my boy's body, NOW!

Look how vibrant that red ring box looked! LOOK AT IT! The ring looked really pretty with that red watch Diao was sporting too.

Red and white rose petals? They wasn't even married yet. Save them for the actual ceremony. Wasting expensive confetti. And the kissing too. Didn't have sex all this time, now they can't stop. Geesh!

I know this is tied into Chinese tradition and Yi's family being Chinese, but YI IS A RED RASCAL!

And leading up to this wedding, there had been so much blue to represent Diao's family being the hindrance to their love, and now this entire wedding was red to represent Yi and his family and Diao becoming a part of his family, and

Y'ALL CAN'T TELL ME NOTHING!

Then to have the gold dragons which represent Yi's family but are also Diao's color.

Y'ALL CAN'T TELL ME SHIT!

I'm in heaven. I do not care what the plot was. I do not care about the fake amnesia. I do not care about how the dog attack turned into a tiger attack. NO ME IMPORTA! Diao called out his father in front of all those rich ass people and God while wearing his man's color, and I'm living for it!

Kuea is a Red Rascal too, and I appreciated this public service announcement.

Diao sucked his thumb (😑), then they fucked, yet my color demon eyes only saw red candles. Thank you, props department!

Makorn asking if Diao wants a new husband (yes, sir. YOU!) while Yi wore red with that product placement red drink . . . *Mwah!* This blue table cloth gotta go though!

Red over Diao's heart, but that damn blue is still there! Diao, where is your yellow and orange, my man?! DONDE?! Oh yeah, they have kids with little rainbow toys. Good for them.

Hold on, was I supposed to remember this little girl? Diao was talking about her like I should know her. Who dafuq Le Ling?

Even this baby was confused. Who is this chick? Girl, for reals, who is you?! This feels like Buffy the Vampire Slayer's fifth season when Dawn was introduced. Like I KNOW I ain't seen this chica before.

Well . . . she's part of the family now, so good for her.

All in all, YI IS A RED RASCAL, and marriage equality will come to Thailand no later than 2026.

And same-sex partners will legally be able to adopt by 2029.

Naughty Babe, Cutie Pie, and Domundi said it with their full chest, and Apollo is gonna cosign it with his bouncy red ball because Red Rascals may not like each other, but they love to cause havoc when least expected, so . . . fuck it up, sis!

Amen.

[destinygoldenstar]

🍀FUCK YUL🍀 - Total Drama Viewer Reacts to Disventure Camp Season 2 Episode 4 “Truth Hurts”

I have the power, right?

If my headings manifest misfortune on the people on it, THEN HERE I AM

I AM MANIFESTING MY POWERS TO STRIKE DOWN THIS MAN BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY

I WANT HIM GONE

...

That's all I wanted to say. There's nothing else that's important.

Oh also, sorry for the delay. This was supposed to come out two days ago, but uh... tech issues.

Let's get into it.

Ooh I like this music they have 🎵

"We had agreed to play today after breakfast. But it seems that he forgot."

I mean, I never had a boyfriend, I'm lesbian XD, but the amount of times I've heard girls in high school whine about their boyfriends doing this very thing is insane.

The boys in this season. Am I right?

Also the mic quality is getting a lot better, I'm realizing that. Very nice.

"Well, if you want to play with me, I can lend you one of my consoles."

I thought she didn't like Tess, so wow. She's sweet.

I like these two, they're so sweet and cute.

NOW KISS

"Hey girls! Good morning. I'm going on a walk in case anyone wants to join."

Oh, you seem to be doing well...

Which is a shock to me considering your only friend here is now out of the game.

I STILL HATE YOU CONNOR. WHY WOULD YOU QUIT AND SAVE YUL?!

"Hunter has been very sweet and thoughtful these past few days. But I sense there is something bothering him."

He's having a queer crisis. Don't worry about it.

"I've had such a hard time connecting with anyone in this place and when I finally did, Connor decided to leave. I feel quite alone here."

Aw, poor Riya.

She just can't connect with anyone or anything here.

WAIT WHOA WHAT THE-

HANG ON THAT WAS OUT OF NOWHERE

SHE JUST FOUND THAT LYING ON THE GROUND?!

"This allows you to have one person from each team permanently sent to the opposing team."

OH

OH I SEE

So she can screw people's alliances over XD

"Silence Oliver! When did I ask for your opinion?"

"One of the reasons I let you stay here is that seeing a poor and pathetic intern so humiliated and worn out every day will help me remember what not to do to others."

Okay then...

"It's just really hard not to be a sociopath, you know?"

"I don't want to lose my humanity just to get some ratings."

Well damn.

"I was just talking to my silly assistant. He does his job horribly."

"I AM IN HEARING RANGE."

"Do you also study on Sundays?"

"Yes, I have to send an essay to my tutor in two days and I'm a little late..."

God I hate that. I hate having to do that.

"The first time we talked, I noticed something strange about you and I realized that the way your parents pressure you is not right."

TELL EM QUEEN

"Lake, you do homework even when you're in the middle of a reality show! You eat very little or you don't eat at all, and worst of all, they decided to commit you to a guy you don't even know. How can that be the best for you?"

THANK YOU. ROSA, OUR QUEEN ALL DAY.

"I recognize that their methods are unorthodox, but the path to success is not easy, Rosa. It is full of obstacles and sacrifices."

"OHO, You want to talk about sacrifices and play THAT card on me?! I BECAME A MOM AT SIXTEEN!"

Come on, Rosa KNOWS what she's talking about!

"Hello? Can I sit here?"

Why is James' mic echoing? Hello? Was something going on and his VA was recording in another location at the time?

You couldn't do second takes and wait till he got back in the booth?

"Since when do you care what I think?"

He doesn't. He just wants to S/A you.

"You know what? Who needs a friend when you have a million followers?"

MOOD.

Oh, is this like that.... what was it-that one challenge from Revenge of the Island?

The one where they were dunked and Scott got that sharks tooth up his ass?

"Not at all, these seats are wet."

Because if it IS like that, can I get Fang over here to kill this guy?

(Kai calling Yul a bitchfucker now lives in my head rent free)

"I found this perk that allows two people to switch teams and I want to use it now."

Oh she's gonna use it right away.

"I... want Yul to go to the Orange team."

YUUUUUUUUUUSSSS

SLAY QUEEN

SLAY QUEEN👑

DUMP HIS ASS ON THE LOSING TEAM AND GET RID OF HIS ASS

RIYA IS QUEEN.

DON'T CARE WHAT Y'ALL SAY. THIS IS A QUEEN.

SHOW RESPECT.

"What? And why me?"

"Because I'm sick of you."

😂

YES.

"And now that I don't have to worry about you voting for me I can say it."

AND she's doing this for strategic reasons?

Actually, YEAH, because of the trio, she's the outcast of her team so she needs to pull an advantage like this to save herself from potentially being a target. THAT MAKES SENSE.

STRATEGIC QUEEN AS WELL.

TAKE NOTES ELLIE.

"Screw you! With that attitude, it's no wonder you have never and will never succeed."

Oh fuck off, weren't you cancelled? You piece of shit.

Why is everything mocking Riya for her being herself? I'm picking up on that.

"I'm going to choose... Rosa Maria."

Oh? Why her?

I'm not against it, but why her?

Did Riya just want an all girls team?

"WELCOME TO OUR WOMEN'S TEAM OF VICTORY!!!"

"Well, and Hunter I guess..."

"That low budget actress underestimates the damage I could do to her, even on another team."

YOU BREAK HER I BREAK YOU BUCKO

"Not only is the women's alliance weakened, I also have a possible new ally."

Oh and now you want to work with him?!

JAMES, YOU HAVE BAD TASTE.

XD

JUST DROWNS THEM XD

So yeah, it IS like that Revenge Of The Island Challenge.

And hopefully I get to see a shark get Yul's ass.

I think his exposed abs will make him seem very appetizing to the sharks.

(NOT ME WISHING DEATH ON A CHARACTER)

"Just know that I have access to any information that has passed through your cell phones and laptops."

OH SO YOU DOXXED.

"Who auditioned for the previous season and was rejected for being considered 'uninteresting'?"

Oh REALLY?

Okay that's a lore drop.

I mean, given the first season's hosts were CRIMINALS, I'd imagine the show was a scam site and there wouldn't be a lot of auditions.

I mean, most of THAT cast was pretty screwed up in the head.

REALLY.

Yeah that is very interesting.

They actually ACKNOWLEDGE that something like that WOULD happen and influence people to alter themselves for the sake of being on the show and the money.

I WANTED THIS IN TOTAL DRAMA.

OMG I LOVE THAT THEY ADDRESS THIS.

So wait, now for the money question:

Which is Aiden's natural hair color? Is it the white or the dark?

NOW YOU GOTTA ANSWER THAT BUDDY.

"Who has been an extra in more than fifty movies, but has never been credited?"

That's Riya. 100%

"Who had their first kiss in the previous challenge?"

OH. OH SHIT...

Oh that's personal.

I THINK that's Maggy. Right?

OH. REALLY.

OH POOR BOTH OF THEM. AIDEN'S FIRST KISS WAS AN ASSAULT?!

YOU POOR THING.

And Lake's first kiss was with a girl.

Gotta love a closeted lesbian with internalized homophobia.

"Ha! Virgins!"

Oh. Shut. Your. Mouth.

Why is EVERYTHING that comes out of this man's mouth bigotry?

And it's not even said in a funny way. That's all he says.

FUCK YUL.

"Are you serious Aiden?"

"It doesn't matter. It's nothing important."

"Thanks for ruining a milestone of my life by the way."

"Who made their previous psychologist have to go to the psychologist?"

Oh god. Yeah that one's so bad...

I can see that being Tess.

"Who forced their ex to have plastic surgery and then ended the relationship because she did it wrong?"

GOD THAT'S HORRIBLE-

It's Yul. It's gotta be Yul. And he's gonna say "SO WHAT? i DoN't SeE wHaT tHe PrObLeM iS, sHe WaS uGlY, sHe DeSeRvEd iT."

"Which one of you has shoplifted?"

Okay that one's not so bad.

Ally may have stolen a game?

OH ROSA.

"A mother would do anything for her children."

AW HONEY.

"A Latina stealing, why am I not surprised?"

I-I-what's going on?

Uh, I got an AD, and the video fast forwarded a minute ahead for some reason XD.

I don't know why it did that.

"Which one of you wears a wig?"

Aiden? Cause of the dye?

What?! Your hair's a wig?

I-I never would've guessed that, honestly.

GIRLIEPOP WHAT HAPPENED?! YOU'RE NOT EVEN A VILLAIN.

Yeah can I be honest you y'all? I've grown SICK of the shaved head trope in Total Drama.

It worked with Heather because vanity was a trait of hers and it was a punishment for her to lose something she held dear to maintain that vanity. And considering she was a villain who tormented others all of Island, it was great karma.

But then they just OVERUSE IT AND BEAT THE DEAD HORSE, and then apply this karma to other characters, where their hair or physical appearance plays no factor to their character. And at that point, it's just so TIRING and I NEVER want to see this again.

I'm kind of okay with this though because it's NOT a punishment. Maybe it's trying to reveal something about Lake's character. Idk what happened, maybe they'll explain it.

"Who uploaded sexy photos to the internet just to gain some fame?"

Uuuuuhhhh... I think that's Riya?

"What? I didn't do it."

Oh okay.

"Just so you know, I didn't do it for fame."

WELL THAT MAKES IT EVEN MORE CONCERNING.

"If we lose on purpose, the challenge will be over."

Why would you want to do that?! IT'S A GAME. YOU'RE TRYING TO WIN A MILLION BUCKS.

Now you're ASKING to be eliminated?!

"The producers say you should find another way to penalize the campers, that doesn't put their lives at risk."

XD

Oh so NOW they care. Where was that concern in Total Drama?

She just sends them back up and they're all dead XD

"Well shit... I'm getting lawsuits for all these bodies, aren't I?"

"Aiden still sleeps with a teddy bear he's had since he was a baby, James' first five thousand followers were bots, Yul and his family escaped from North Korea, Maggy has sent five boys to the hospital, when Lake is home alone she punches pillows with pictures of her parents-"

SHE'S REALLY GOING AT IT 😂

"Rosa doesn't know who the father of her daughter is and thought about aborting her."

Oh shit...

That one's SO BAD...

Rosa, girlie, you want some therapy?

"Tess is an orphan."

Okay these are actually really interesting.

"Riya was desperate for major roles and almost starred in adult movies."

Yeah these are actually saying a lot about these people.

So Tess has no family. Her life is basically nothing. She has depression as a result. Got it.

Riya is... AMBITIOUS AS HELL.

I'm surprised she's not even more ruthless honestly with all that evidence.

"I WILL MURDER EVERYONE FOR A MILLION BUCKS AND A STARRING MOVIE ROLE AND YOU CAN'T STOP ME!!"

"...AND BECAUSE GOLDEN WANTS SO, YUL WILL BE FIRST."

"Ally and Tess are in love with Hunter and he knows it."

Yeah we already know that one.

"Which one of you had sex reassignment surgery?"

Oh?

Oh so someone's trangender.

Who is it? Who's the rep?

Nobody is opening up? I mean I respect boundaries, but also I wanna know.

I'm guessing Maggy? I'm not sure...

"Which one of you threatened and made a group of children cry?"

Oh shit.

Uh... I have no idea.

UM... NOW I'M CONCERNED ABOUT YOU.

"Do you make kids cry whenever you're stressed?"

See, even Hunter's concerned.

"I was playing online and they were using hacks!"

Oh so you're a cyberbully. Yeah I get it. I TOTALLY SYMPATHIZE. /s

I'm sad there were no sharks to slay Yul.

"Welcome to the team, Yul!"

James. Politely. He's not worth it.

"Now what? Are you going to vote me out for having belonged to the Green Team?"

I mean, why not, right?

We know Season 1 attempted that at one point.

JAMES IF YOU ALLY WITH YUL I WILL HATE YOU TOO

"I've noticed that you have a certain dislike towards James. So I propose this: Let's vote for him together and at the next ceremony, you'll return the favor by voting for whoever I want you to."

This is trying to make Yul seem like a brilliant schemer villain, but uh...

THIS IS JAMES' PLAN. NOT HIS.

So, you know, I give credit to James for this. What do you gain from Aiden voting James? That's Yul only person willing to be an ally in his case.

And in James' case, he doesn't KNOW the girls are voting Yul, he's just assuming that with no proof. What if they vote him? You're asking Aiden to vote you, which could be a 3/5.

WHY WOULD JAMES CAUSE HIS OWN ELIMINATION?

Yul gains nothing from this. James gains nothing from this.

What is your plan here?

"How do I know I can trust you?"

"It's not about trust, its about mutual interest."

10/10 persuading there.

"He must be desperate, but Yul deserves to be kicked out."

THANK YOU. THANK YOU FOR SEEING THAT.

"I pretended to side with him and will vote for James, just because it will be nice to see James' face when he sees that he has two votes against him."

Okay, you're a dumbass.

"I'm not siding with Yul, BUT I WILL DO WHAT YUL SAYS."

GOD I HOPE YUL GOES.

PLEASE. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. GET YUL OUT.

'YUL'

I LOVE YOU, WHOEVER DID THAT.

'JAMES'

'MAGGY'

Fuck.

'YUL'

Okay so Yul gets a third vote and majority and he's gone.

WE WIN!!😄

...😦

GODDAMMIT!!!

Maggy, for the love of god, BEAT HIS ASS.

Maggy didn't even do anything this episode, WTF?

"Wait, you two... lied to my face?"

YOU KNOW YOU CAN'T TRUST EITHER OF THEM. YOU SAID THIS YOURSELF YOU DUMBASS.

"Why are you surprised?"

Why does a tie benefit you? You could've instead allied with Aiden to vote off Maggy and lied to say Lake and Maggy were targeting Aiden.

Sure Aiden might not believe it and still vote James and this tie would still happen, BUT AT LEAST THEN YUL HAS THE EXCUSE OF HIM NOT INTENDING TO PUT HIMSELF IN DANGER.

Fuck this guy. FUCK THIS GUY.

But I'll tolerate the stupidity IF HE GOES HOME. I WILL LOVE THAT.

"How about a random, unbiased game of rock paper scissors?"

The way he said scissors?

I mean, SAI-SOURS.

Oh my god PLEASE, PLEASE

PLEASE

GET HIS ASS OUT.

WIN THIS MAGGY. STAND UP FOR YOURSELF.

YOU GOT THIS GIRL. YOU GOT THIS!!!!

🙌

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUKKKKKK

WHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

FUCK OFF. FUCK OFF.

SHE DIDN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING THIS EPISODE. WHAT THE FUCK.

THIS IS BULLSHIT. I HATE THIS.

"Go back to the circus, freak!"

So he's been bullying her for nothing the whole time, she NEVER gets a chance to stand up for herself or do anything about it besides get bullied, AND THEN SHE GOES HOME WITH THE BULLY GETTING AWAY WITH IT COMPLETELY?!

That just sucks. I don't like that.

I get it may be realistic in this setting. I don't like that.

I didn't like it in Action either, BUT AT LEAST IN ACTION BOTH CHARACTERS HAD SUBSTANCE AND DUNCAN WASN'T COMPLETELY TERRIBLE.

YUL JUST FUCKING SUCKS. And Maggy has no character besides "Everyone bullies me".

FUCK OFF.

"Wow, calm down. A little more stress and you will also lose your eyebrow hair."

Nine more episodes of this guy, and I might just be burned alive from my own DISTAIN.

Okay that's something I guess.

THANK YOU MAGGY FOR AT LEAST DOING THAT.

Uh... should that count as slaying Yul? Idk cause it's a 'Yes & No'

I'll put her in her own tier.

What the hell is going on with you?

So are they just gonna make out in the woods?

And that was the episode... I'm angry. I just-UGH.

I think Yul ALONE is dragging this down for me.

I definitely do think I'm liking Season 1 better.

I just fucking hate this man. This man is TRASH. HUMAN TRASH. TRASH.

Like I did with Season 1, I'll make a character tier list after the season, and explain in FULL DETAIL why Yul is SO HORRIBLE.

And it's not just because he's SUPPOSED to be unlikeable. Fiore was GREAT, and she was a villain. Grett is unlikeable, and I loved her. You could make some arguments about even Jake being unlikeable because he's a flawed character. But I still loved him.

I also just don't like him as a character and he does not work for me as even a villain. The fact that he has to rely on OTHER PEOPLE to do strategic stuff for him, and rely on LUCK to save himself in the game, is PISS POOR TOTAL DRAMA VILLAIN WRITING. I'M SORRY.

If Fiore, A SIX YEAR OLD, can come up with her own strategies, THEN YUL IS AN EVEN WORSE PIECE OF SHIT BY THIS SHOW'S STANDARDS.

(I must state perfectly clear and blatant so nobody throws accusations of my intent: NONE of that is directed at anyone who worked on the show, nor the VA. Do not go harass anyone or him for anything. All my screaming and rage is ONLY at the FICTIONAL CHARACTER. Not any real life people. Don’t harass them. It’s wrong. Always. It’s wrong.)

And he's our main villain... GOD HELP ME.

He's gonna be here the whole time, I just know it. And I'm gonna hate it.

Maggy? You punched him in the face. I salute you.

But I don't care about you.

She did NOTHING IN HER OWN ELIMINATION EPISODE. WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?

What even WAS her character this whole time? "I'm big. I'm a bully victim. I lost."

Riya's my best girl. And Rosa. Maybe Lake too. I also like Tess-THE GIRLS REMAINING ARE ALL GOOD.

Riya, I salute you for kicking Yul out when you did and telling him off. YOU GO QUEEN.

QUEEN DESERVES TO SLAY. Honestly.

You want to slay Yul and break the rules to get him eliminated? YOU DO IT. DO WHAT YOU WANT WITH THESE BOYS.

So in conclusion... girls good. boys... bleh. Fuck Yul. Thank you. Namaste.

[autumn-foxfire]

Episode 2! Where he see how bad a couple Aoko and Kaito are in the series already!

Kaito does not have the highest opinion of Nakamori, does he T-T

Okay, confession time. I actually find the criminal organization after KID to be extremely underwhelming, especially compared to the org we get in Detective Conan.

Oh who is this professor, Jii 👀

Kaito insults Aoko's father, the man who has been helping feed Kaito and look after him while his parents fuck off around the world. Aoko assault Kaito for his comment and walks off as if she hadn't and then Kaito also forgets Aoko, his childhood friend and "love interests" own birthday! Romance~

Oh god Kaito even insults her appearance in a very disgusting way. I love Magic Kaito for the chance to learn the other side of Kaito, I hate it for how gross Kaito can be as a character.

And Aoko's hatred of KID means she'll probably never accept Kaito for who he truly is. She probably would have if he had told her so much sooner but he doesn't because the men in any of his series don't actually trust the women in their lives <.<

Gosho, people arguing isn't love.

Nakamori is just straight up trying to kill Kaito. Where does he get the money for this?! It's a thief that returns everything he steals. I guess they can't stand the mockery of the police department.

Kaito's plan to get the jewel: Make them grab a dummy and then jump into the fray.

Kaito couldn't even be bothered to change the date of the heist so he could go to Aoko's birthday <.< Love to see how much he cares about her.

Snake is so boring as a character. Especially compared to the danger we see from Gin.

The fact he just gives away all the information Kaito asks for too <.< God, Magic Kaito's writing wasn't really the strongest, was it.

Keiko, you do know girls and boys can be friends right? And that it would be weird if she DIDN'T invite the boy who is her childhood friends.

So there are multiple jewels like Pandora with great power? And it's just Pandora that has the power over immortality.

This should have given away to them that this isn't Toichi. There are so many plot holes in Magic Kaito.

The fact that Nakamori also forgot Aoko's birthday is disgusting too.

She has every right to be upset, actually. Both her parents are bad and you also ditched her.

But of course Kaito came up with a great idea at last minute, it shows us how much he "cares".

At least I can give Kaito something. His last minute ideas are much better than Shinichi's last minute ideas. Aoko deserves so much better though.

[sideeffectsofhavingnolife]

IPKKND S:1 EP-6

I swear to God! There's some supernatural power at play that keeps me from being consistent with anything in my life.

Why is it that everytime I try to be productive, life springs me ten miles backwards.

But No Worries, We are back on track to watch the sixth episode of Iss pyaar ko kya naam doon.

"Hum jaa rahe hai" She is so cute.

Oh my god! Bua ji is tagging along. I must have missed that in the last episode. This is just as bad as it sounds.

"Bina dil ki dilli, Maachis ki tilli" Ayo! I live in Delhi. But I also kinda do lack a heart at times. So maybe that's true.

But does the tailer dude has to rhyme, 'cause maachis ki tilli' doesn't add anything to this.

Yes boy! stand up for us delhites.

"Un gundo ko aapse bachaya tha"Oh he is so sweet.

"Pehle hi darshan ho gaye... devi maiyaa ke." I like him.

Take your chance, boy. Let her know that you two are going to be sharing the city.

This is unnecessarily emotional.

That traffic ain't nothing, girl. You should see it now.

I don't like Bua ji but she is right! That's how you gotta cross the road here.

But take them with you, why would you leave them behind! The Bua keeps getting worse.

They just sat in a rikshaw without telling him their destination OR negotiating the price. Is an auto supposed to be a new concept?

"Humare auto me to teen ka hi permit hai, mata ji!" Even the rikshaw waala is roasting her.

Ughh, Stop staring at women and focus on the road. I hate how this is being shown in a playful light because this is so common it's not even taken seriously anymore.

So they are going to Laxmi nagar, close to my home just that it was 12 years ago.

Lovely! Throw some more bags at him.

Lol! He just flew Bua ji with him.

No way! She just had a whole fucking moment with that man.

And she has the audacity to accuse Khushi of being immodest.

Does she know him? Probably not.

Why does she have a home here?

"Kaam se dosti aur khud se dushmani" What a fucking line to define workaholics.

My girl is literally fucking with a plug switch to turn on the fan. Don't be that dumb Khushi.

I relate to clumsy Khushi though.

Wow! That really triggered Bua Ji. Accept it Bua ji you were thirsting after that man.

"Uske sage baap ka call hai" Why is she so despicable?

Are we always going to have sulky mother. Will she ever come around?

'Pardes'? She just went to another city. Everyone is so overdramatic.

But if I was stuck with Bua ji, I would be crying rivers as well.

or just straight up...

The spider webs? how long has it been? Was it left unattended for 20 years or so.

The bed looks okay though. I would just go to sleep without cleaning anything.

Where did they get these golden stars hangings from? did they visit Arnav's ad shoot as well.

Yess! Die bitch, Die on dust and pollution. That would make me soo happy.

She's got asthma, God is fair.

Lol! She just dropped dead on the bed. Way to go!

My girl stole a scooter, she's already a thief. God knows! what would Delhi make of her?

Hard luck Arnav, wo ladki tumhe chhod ke nahi jaane waali.

Noo! Why is she fine? I want her to be gone!

Stop driving in the opposite direction. That's not a new rule either.

And she banged up his car! Nice! He is totally gonna ask her to pay for it or something.

A little bit of "Aap", a little bit of "Tum" that's all we want.

To the next episode we go!!!

[queen-of-writing-bad-things]

Henry Danger Reader Insert | Captain Man x Reader: SEASON 3

Episode 6: Hour of Power Part 1

~In the Man Cave~

"And according to city officials, this mistake at Swellview prison is the biggest mistake in the history of prison mistakes." Those were the words of Mary Gaperman as Charlotte, Jasper and (y/n) watched the afternoon news on the supercomputer.  

Some big-time criminal had escaped from jail and for some reason, it put the young woman on edge, but she wouldn't let anyone catch on to her nervousness.

"Wow, so disturbing. And now, we go live to Swellview Prison with reporter, Barnie Viragosa." Trent rolled the Latino name as (y/n) glanced at the news roll at the bottom of the screen. A criminal named "Drex" was out and she suddenly felt a chill of fear run down her spine.

"Want some soup?" Jasper asked the two girls, breaking (y/n) out of her worry. She didn't want to sound rude, but drinking someone else's soup was a bit gross.

"You don't share soup," Charlotte told the boy, rolling her eyes at her friend's weirdness. Even after many years of friendship, Jasper still knew how to catch her by surprise.

"I share soup with my mom." He noted, not seeing anything weird about what he just said.

"Do we look like your mom?" (y/n) asked him sarcastically, wondering at his oddness. She'd heard all about Mrs Dunlop and knew that she wasn't going to be winning any Moth of the Year Awards soon.

"I wish..." He said wistfully, but (y/n) shushed him as the reporter came on screen. She wanted to know everything about this escape since it could very well be the end of everything in the Man Cave.

"I'm here outside Swellview Prison with Mark Landry from the prison parole board. Mr Landry..." The reporter turned to the pale-faced man, who looked extremely worried and for good reason.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." He grabbed the mic so he could apologise profusely as he knew that he'd released a literal menace into society.

"How could you have accidentally released one of the FBI's most dangerous criminals by mistake?" Barnie asked him sharply, grilling the poor guy with his stern words.

"Um, see, today is bring-your-daughter-to-work day and my daughter, Molly, was playing with my computer and somehow, she released Drex from prison. Again, I'm so sorry." He explained, gulping at the thought of the rampaging criminal cutting down people in his path.

"Molly, how could you release Drex, knowing how dangerous he is?" The reporter bent down next to the girl, who looked very innocent with her half-eaten banana.

"I'm five." She gave him a gummy smile, proving that it wasn't her fault that Drex had been released. She was just messing about.

"Oh, kids do say the stupidest things." The reporter chuckled, although he was making himself out to be the stupid one by picking on a small child.

"Uh, Barnie, any news on the location of this criminal named Drex?" Trent asked, just as the psycho himself crept into the shot and strangled an unsuspecting prison officer. 

"Not at this time, but investigators are using all available resources to conduct a complete search of literally everywhere," Barnie answered as (y/n) gasped at the sight of Drex. And to make matters worse, here came Ray.

"Charlotte! I need you to log into the Man Copter's computer guidance system." The superhero instructed his assistant as he came trotting down from the sprocket in his super suit. He must've heard about Drex and was preparing for the battle if the numerous weapons he was collecting were anything to go by.

"Ooooo, you're taking the Man Copter?" Jasper asked, excited to see his favourite hero in the helicopter. It was always so awesome to see him in action. 

"I don't have time for questions," Ray replied sharply, lifting a hand to Jasper's face and marching over to where a stash of blasters and bombs had risen from the floor. He'd need everything in his arsenal to take on Drex.

"Where are you going?" Charlotte asked her box, but (y/n) already knew the answer and it terrified her. The was a bitter history between the superhero and criminal, for more reasons than she cared to remember. 

"To catch Drex." He said, strapping a load of grenades and ammo to his chest. He ignored the wide-eyed stare given to him by his darling girl and kept loading up his pockets. He was doing this to protect her.

"You answered her question." Jasper pouted as (y/n) took out her gumball tube. If Ray thought he was going alone then he had another thing coming. 

"What?" Ray frowned at Jasper's pouting but didn't notice the tube in the young woman's hand. 

"You said, you didn't have time to answer any questions, but I guess that only applies to my questions." He sulked whilst Ray grabbed several blasters. It seemed like overkill, but he knew the violent rage of Drex and he knew that it might not be enough to stop him.

"Thanks for understanding." He smiled sarcastically at the curly-haired boy, who just picked up a grenade and shoved it into his back pocket. Maybe it would come in handy.

"Okay, I'm logged into the Man Copter computer," Charlotte reported and turned around to await further instructions.  

"Good. Set all weapons to the ready position. Locked and loaded." Ray told her and lowered the weapons cabinet back into the floor, much to (y/n)'s annoyance.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, what about my blasters?" She looked at him with knitted eyebrows. and he returned her confusion. Why would she need blasters?

"What do you mean?" Ray asked her and his blindness made her roll her eyes. She saw how it was, he didn't want her to go and risk her life, but it wasn't up to him, not this time. He needed help to take down this bastard and she was going to stick by him.

"How am I meant to fight Drex with no weapons?" She questioned and wiggled her gum tube under his nose, which caused his eyes to darken. No, she couldn't, not against him, he wouldn't allow it.

"You're staying here where it's safe. I'm outta here." He pushed the tube out of his face and tried to run off before she could say anything, but it was a dumb move. Jasper and Charlotte shouted at him to stop and a soft yet strong hand on his wrist pulled him back. Like he could run out on his girl like that.

"What? I gotta go." He grumbled at her and his heart twinged at the hurt in her eyes. He knew she wanted to fight and he loved to see her kick ass, but this wasn't a just fight and Drex wasn't some petty criminal. He was dangerous and would only use her as a weapon against him, so he just couldn't risk putting her in harm's way.

"Why can't (y/n) go with you? And Henry's not here." Jasper frowned, wondering why he was so quick to get away. Normally, he'd get all moody if his sidekicks couldn't go with him and now, he wanted to go solo. Very weird.

"You want me to text him and find out how far he is?" Charlotte offered, thinking that she was doing a kind thing, but it just freaked Ray out. He was going alone, end of.

"Uh, no! No, no, no." He quickly rambled, stopping Charlotte's thumb from tapping on her PearPhone.

"Why not?" The girl asked him in suspicion, noting how (y/n) was being unusually quiet around her boyfriend. Something was going on here and she didn't like it.

"Uh, 'cause I already contacted him. Yeah, and he said he's gonna meet me there, so..." He lied, making (y/n) fold her arms in irritation. He was a terrible liar, particularly when he was squirming under her studying eyes. 

"Really? That's the best you got?" She asked, pursing her lips when he chuckled nervously. He couldn't bullshit his way out of this.

"Hey, look! That's Henry calling me right now!... Hi, Henry." Ray grabbed his phone from his utility belt and pressed it to his ear in the hope that they buy it. However, his friends weren't stupid.

"I didn't hear your phone ring," Jasper commented and the girls agreed. He'd have to try harder than that if he wanted to fool them. 

"It's set to silent." He lied and because he was so engrossed in keeping up his elaborate fibbing, he didn't hear the elevator ding or see how Henry stepped out with a snowcone. Well, this was awkward.

"Uh, sorry, Henry, Jasper was bothering me. Oh, you do? So, you're gonna meet me there? Great." He smiled into his phone as a puzzled teen walked up behind him. How he hadn't noticed Henry's presence was astounding, but then again, so was his belief that they fall for this crap.

"So, let me get this straight, you're on the phone with Henry, right now?" (y/n) pointed at the phone with a smirk, loving how Ray was such a doofus and hating how he was lying to her. Drex was a sore spot for both of them and it hurt to know that he'd rather make something up than be honest with her.

"Yeah, obvi. Sorry, Henry, I'm back. Yeah, girlfriend trouble. Great, so I'll meet you there---" The young woman wrinkled her nose at his distasteful behaviour and that's when Henry decided to jump in. He needed an explanation.

"Gonna meet me where?" He asked his boss, making the man jump at his voice. He turned around slowly and saw that Henry was in fact in the room, which blew his story to bits. Well, now he looked like an idiot.

"I gotta go, Henry...Winkler, ehhh..." He mumbled and put down his phone, feeling very foolish in front of his friends. It was safe to say that his plan had been a complete disaster.

"Why are you in uniform?" Henry gestured to Ray's suit and looked to (y/n) for answers too, but she just glared at the back of Ray's head. Girlfriend troubles indeed.

"Uniform?" He repeated, struggling for an answer that Henry would believe and him being a smart kid meant that it would have to be good.

"Yeah, you know, bright costumes, red and blue. We wear them a lot." (y/n) wandered over to Henry's side, running her fingertips over Ray's arm as she brushed past. It made him stumble even more as he knew that it wasn't her usual teasing touch. 

"What's with the extra weapons?" Henry asked, looking at the bombs, blasters, guns, whatever was strapped to Ray. It told him that he was going. against something big and it didn't sit right with him.

"Weapons? Uh---hey, Schwoz!" Ray returned to his original plan and grabbed his phone again. He was dumb at times, he should've learned that pretending to be on the phone was never a roaring success, especially when you were calling your friends.

"Your phone didn't ring." Henry pointed out, picking up the same point from earlier, although it seemed like Jasper had fallen for it.

"It's on silent." He hissed to his best friend, making (y/n) snort in amusement.

"Absolute bullshit," She shook her head with a bitter smile, not buying it for one moment.

"What's that you say, Schwoz? I should leave the Man Cave right now and Henry and Charlotte and (y/n) and Jasper should stay here and not ask me any questions? Good, good idea." He moved past his girlfriend and upheld his fake conversation, which was then promptly ruined as Schowz came skipping in.

"Here, I got it, I got it! Right here!" He exclaimed, staring at the weapon he'd brought along. Ray growled in frustration as his plan was ruined yet again and he was once more the fool.

"I gotta go, Schwoz...Winkler!" He "hung up" and faced a wall of angry teens and a disgruntled girlfriend. Oh geez, he was in deep shit.

"Hey, I thought you said you were going to leave before (y/n) noticed and Henry got here." Schwoz pondered when he saw their presence, not realising that he was ruining Ray's poor attempts to keep everything under wraps.

"Oh, will you be quiet! Ever?" The large man snapped and snatched the weapon from Schwoz's grasp so he could clip it to his belt. Honestly, how Schwoz kept his feelings for (y/n) a secret for so many years was a mystery to him.

"Raymond, please tell me what's going on here." (y/n) pleaded with her boyfriend, crossing her arms and swallowing the lump in her throat. Since when had there been something he couldn't tell her about? When had he started lying to her?

"Uhhhh..." Ray panicked, not knowing how to tell her and his sidekick that this was a fight they couldn't handle.

"Dude, if there's something going on, tell us, we're your sidekicks," Henry added to the argument, also feeling like (y/n). If his boss had a problem, he wanted to help him solve it.

"Wait, I'm confused. I thought your plan was to go fight that guy, Drex, and not tell Henry and (y/n) so they'd never know about it." Schwoz said, ignoring the subtle shushes given to him by Ray. Loose lips sink ships and now, Ray was left with two pissed off sidekicks.

"Oh, that's it! Come here! Until you learn to be quiet..." The superhero wrapped an arm around Schwoz's neck and forced him to walk to the supercomputer, where a basket of fruit was sitting. He picked up a pineapple and held it in front of the poor handyman's face.

"Ray, not the pineapple!" Charlotte and Henry begged him to let Schwoz go, but a bellowing order from Ray made them shut their mouths swiftly. The small guy turned around and they all winced to see that a fun pineapple had been shoved into his mouth, leaving just the green leaves poking out.

"Okay, you kids have fun. (y/n), take care of them, I should be back by dinner time." He told them calmly, like what had just happened was nothing, leaving the teens to stutter as he walked away.

"Ray, please! Talk to me, I'm your girlfriend." (y/n) cried, sniffing as he tried to leave without so much as an explanation or even a kiss. She hated this, it was like he didn't care, but that'd the thing. He cared so much and he didn't want to upset her, but there was no way he could do this without doing so.

"Sweet girl, I gotta go fight a really bad guy, you know that. And...I gotta fight him alone." He sighed, stroking her cheeks softly with gloved hands as she and Henry processed the information. Alone? No way.

"Why?" Henry asked, not seeing why he got to do the work while they sat on the sidelines. He and Ray and now (y/n) had fought so much together, surely, they could take on this asshole.

"'Cause we know Drex, he's--he's bad on a whole 'nother level," Ray replied whilst Schwoz tried to tug the pineapple out of his mouth. It couldn't be that bad, could it?

"Well, how do you both know him?" Henry asked, making the couple freeze up. Did they have to answer that? Wasn't the knowledge that they knew Drex enough for the kid?

"I'm sorry, what?" Ray played dumb, gulping at the memory of the evil dude. It was so long ago, but it still infuriated him and his hate ran deep, much deeper than anyone could ever understand. What that man did to him and her, just to be cruel, was something he'd never forget.

"How do you both know this guy, Drex?" Henry repeated, not letting up. There was history here, he could sense it, but he could never guess how deep it really went.

"Oh, you know, just from...stuff," (y/n) excused anxiously, not wanting to dwell on the past either. Usually, she was happy to talk about anything with Henry; he was like her younger brother and she loved talking about her experiences so he'd learn from them. But Drex, he was something she'd rather stay buried.

"Stuff?" Henry frowned, not liking how secretive they were being, but he wouldn't have to wait any longer for an answer, because Schwoz had finally pulled that damn fruit from his mouth. Maybe it would've been better for Ray if he'd shoved it in a bit deeper.

"Why don't you just tell Henry that Drex used to be your sidekick and (y/n)'s boyfriend?!" He exclaimed, making Ray and (y/n) shudder in panic. 

"Schwoz, you dick!" The young woman shrieked at him as Henry dropped his snowcone. Drex, sidekick, boyfriend? What the fuck? 

"You had a sidekick before me? And you dated a criminal?" Henry gawped at his boss with utter betrayal written across his face. The couple felt trapped by the truth, especially at how it seemed to crush the boy, who had always thought he'd been Captain Man's first. And (y/n), sweet, kind, innocent (y/n). He couldn't believe that she'd go out with someone so evil, the thought of her with anyone but Ray was simply...wrong.

"Uhhh...hel--hey..." Ray tried to try the phone trick again, but it wouldn't wash this time. Henry was disgusted and hurt, he didn't want tricks. Charlotte grabbed a towel to clean up the melting snowcone on the floor and Henry began to pace. How had he not seen the lies and the guilt?

"I can't believe this. I cannot believe this!" He gasped at the couple as they watched him. He could've been overreacting, but he could have also been underreacting. This was a big shock to him and it felt like his relationship with them had been built on a lie.

"Oh, you say that every week." Ray dismissed his feelings with a wave of his hand, which earnt him a smack on the chest.

"Ray! Be nice." She hissed at him. She was worried that the kid thought badly of her now, but he had to know that she was very young at the time and Drex seemed so lovely for a twenty-year-old with questionable feelings for her boss. He was closer to her age and Ray seemed so out of her reach that she just thought "fuck it" and went out with him a few times. But that then turned into a lot of times and a few kisses later, she found herself with a boyfriend. 

"I don't know, I just thought that I was your first sidekick. And (y/n) dating him, ugh..." Henry rubbed his neck and tried to seem less sad than he was. 

"Well..."

"It wasn't like that--" Ray and (y/n) tried to soothe his worries, but they couldn't. Lies hurt, especially when they were told to a kid who'd idolised you since he was a small child.

"You had a sidekick before me and you never told me?" The boy whimpered, breaking their hearts. He'd grown so much since they first met him and he was no longer a child, not really. But at that moment, they saw a glimpse of the same kid who stumbled through the elevator door and jumped on an old lady's back to help Captain man. They'd hurt him and it sucked. 

"Well, no, but only because I didn't want you to know." Ray offered him an excuse, which didn't go down very well with the kid. 

"Oh, shut up, doofus...Look, Hen, it was a really long time ago and...I just want to forget that I ever looked his way. I'm sorry that we've upset you." (y/n) put her hand on the boy's shoulder and gave him her best soft smile in an attempt to tell him that they never wanted him to find out like this, but she never got a reply.

"Hey, something's happening upstairs in Junk-N-Stuff." Schwoz interrupted from his place at the supercomputer, making everyone sprint over to see what was going on. 

"Hello? Hello? Where do you go? I need my change." A lady shouted on the monitor as she held a funny-looking statue. 

"Jasper, why aren't you up there?" Charlotte asked her friend as she realised that the poor woman had been left alone for a long time. God knows what would've happened if she had wandered into the back.

"I was but I came down here to get change for a twenty and then I just got distracted." He. recalled, suddenly feeling like it would probably be best to get back to work.

"Jesus, that was forty-five minutes ago!" (y/n) gasped and the group pushed the teen in the direction of the elevator so he could go serve the customer before she wrote a bad review online. Honestly, how they hadn't gone out of business yet was anyone's guess.

"Son...give me the proton grenade," Ray stopped him before he could return to work, remembering how the boy had nicked one of them from the weapon stash. Looks like nothing got past Captain Man. Well, almost nothing. 

"But it's so cool." He whined, holding it in his hand so he could look at the bomb in his hand. None of the other kids in his school got to work as he did, he just wanted a bit of action. 

"Curly!" (y/n) snapped at him with a scolding face and he relented. No one wanted to get one of her teacher-like lectures.

"Fine." Jasper sighed and chucked the grenade back to Ray, making Henry, Charlotte and Schwoz duck for cover. Just because Ray and (y/n) would be fine, didn't mean they didn't want to get blown to bits.

"So, this bad guy, Drex. He was your sidekick and your ex-boyfriend?" Henry picked up where they had left off once Jasper had disappeared into the elevator. It seemed like he wasn't letting this go, despite the apology given to him by (y/n).

"Yes, for a little while," Ray answered, deciding that the truth was the only option now, even if it stung. God, he hated to remember how Drex got to have his girl first and made him sit and watch how she fell in love with him. It was a brief romance but it was Ray's first taste of jealousy over a woman he was genuinely falling for and it still infuriated him to know how that bastard knew the taste of her lips and the feel of her skin like he did.

"Look, I hired Drex nine years ago, it was before I even had this Man Cave," Ray exclaimed, feeling antsy at how he was being forced to revisit the events of nine years ago, back when (y/n) was fresh out of college and nowhere near as in love with him as he was with her. 

"Why did you date such a bad guy, (y/n/n)?" Charlotte asked the young woman, who had chosen to stay silent unless she was spoken to. People make mistakes in their youth, it's normal and it was safe to say that Drex was one of her biggest. A way of ignoring the tugging on her heart for a man she thought she couldn't have.

"Because in every way, he was perfect." She shrugged, looking at her feet shyly as she was forced to talk about her ex in front of her current boyfriend, who hated seeing her so flustered about another guy. A guy who at present, had dated her for longer than he had and that made him insecure. 

"Well, w-why? What made him so perfect?" Henry stuttered, feeling just as envious as Ray, although his jealousy was for a different reason. He was a better sidekick than this Drex, he was sure of it.

"I don't know, Drex just had it all. He was sweet and handsome, brave and strong." She shrugged, trying to think of all the reasons her younger self fell for Drex, but looking back, it wasn't love. It was meaningless and nothing compared to what she had now, just the fantasy of a young girl who knew nothing about the real world or how manipulative people could be.

"Hot mom." Ray shrugged, making her snap her head to him with offence in her eyes. That wasn't necessary, but it was the bitterness speaking.

"Ray!" Henry hissed, seeing how the hurt flashed across the woman's face. That wasn't something you said in front of your girlfriend.

"Well, not as hot as yours!" It slipped from Ray's lips before he could stop himself, a rehearsed comment from years of turning to other women when his heart ached for its soulmate. But it wasn't needed now, or ever again, he had the one he wanted, not that his words told her that.

"Yeah, Henry's mom is lovely." She sniffed and stared at the floor, wanting to avoid Ray's eyes so he wouldn't see the tears in hers. She knew it, she just knew it. All those girls before her, Henry's attractive mother, were still on his mind and she was just the next idiot in line. She had told herself that everything was too good to be true, but she didn't want to believe it, not when he told her those three little words with such sincerity. He must've been a good actor because she thought he'd played her for a fool.

"So, why wasn't Drex the perfect boyfriend and sidekick?" Charlotte moved on quickly, hoping the older girl would forget what had just been said, but it was already putting doubt in her mind.

"Uh, well, he...has a dark side." (y/n) shrugged, willing her voice to stay steady as she spoke. She was a big girl, she could handle this, even though she was feeling very, very small.

"Dark how?" Henry frowned, finding her choice of words unusual.

"Evil, mean, he started to change one day. I just remember realising that he was violent and cruel and dangerous...we..." She stopped halfway through, wondering if the kids needed to know the worst of it. 

"You..." Charlotte leaned forward, wondering what could be so awful that she couldn't say it. They were all friends, she could tell them, there was no need to be afraid.

"Had an argument, he shouted at me and pushed me against the wall and threatened me. He...wasn't very nice after that and then Ray found out." (y/n) skipped around the finer details and left it open for them to interpret everything. They got the gist of how badly it ended, particularly when they saw the Ray tensed in anger. No one messed with a defenceless girl, especially when she was as sweet as she was.

"One day, Drex and I...we had it out," Ray revealed, remembering how he just lost it when he learnt about how evil his former sidekick really was. He couldn't bear to have that kind of filth wearing his uniform and sullying his good name, not to mention harming the woman he'd fallen in love with. 

"You guys fought?!" Charlotte gasped, not believing that Ray would challenge someone who was supposed to be his greatest ally. But, then again, if it was for (y/n), he'd do anything.

"It was horrible. Drex treated (y/n) very badly." Schwoz piped up, recalling how it was one of the darkest times in Captain Man's history, which was why neither Ray nor (y/n) liked to talk about it.

"But you won, right?" Henry looked at his boss with a hopeful expression. Obviously, Ray had been the victor; he was standing here and for nearly a decade, Drex had been behind bars, but that didn't mean it was a battle easily won.

"Barely," Ray whispered, growing quiet at the thought of how he'd almost lost his life.

"Barely?! But you're like the best fighter in the whole world." Charlotte pointed out his skill and strength and how Captain Man was known to be one of the greatest superheroes there was.

"Even that wasn't good enough against Drex. He came home all battered and exhausted, I'd never seen him like that and I haven't since." (y/n) mentioned quietly, remembering how Ray had stumbled into the old Man Cave in a terrible state after a whole night of waiting for his return. He had fallen into her arms and told her it was done, but the fight had taken a toll on him. 

"If I wasn't indestructible, believe me, I would've been, y'know, destructed." Ray shrugged, reaching to wrap an arm around his girlfriend so he could comfort her, but she didn't want it. How many other girls had he put that arm around and whispered sweet nothings into their ears? Did it feel the same for them as it felt for her? Real and honest?

"I just can't believe I'm not your first sidekick." Henry reiterated, still baffled at how the secret had been kept for so long.

"Hey...you're the first sidekick that I really care about." Ray put a hand on his arm since he couldn't give (y/n) any comfort, which baffled him too.

"Oh, you tell that to Drex too?" Henry scoffed, rebuffing Ray's touch with a scowl. He found himself in a similar situation to the young woman, not the first and possibly not the favourite.

"No!...Well, maybe." Ray admitted that the conversation might have cropped up between him and Drex back when they were still friends and it soured the mood even more.

"Henry, Drex was only here for, like, six months. He never fought any crime with...him and I never made my chocolate chip cookies for him, like I do for you." (y/n) butted in, moving past her boyfriend and gave Henry a small smile. Drex would never match up to him, he was a good kid, she just needed to get it into his head.

"Did you think about it?" He asked, sensing that it could've crossed her mind at some point.

"I beg your pardon?" She muttered quickly, feeling a bit stuck since she had technically thought up the recipe for Drex, but had never gotten the chance to make them.

"Oh, god!" Henry took her nerves and the following silence as her confession and turned away in anger and hurt.

"Just say no!" Schwoz told her when she looked to him and Charlotte for help. She wasn't sure if her heart could take looking at Ray at the moment, she just wanted to be on her own for a while.

"Uh, you guys. There's breaking news." Charlotte piped up as she scrolled on her PearPad. This looked big and they all needed to see it.

"What news?" Ray asked in a tetchy voice. This was all too much for him, the secrets being aired, Drex on the loose, (y/n) avoiding him, what was he meant to do?

"It says that mistakenly released criminal, known only as Drex, has been spotted in North Swellview travelling south on East Avenue." She read out, making the hair on the back of (y/n)'s neck stand up, Ray's too.

"I know where he's going." She realised, getting the picture that he was playing some sort of game.

"The bakery district." Ray seethed, knowing exactly what happened there and why he was luring him to it: to taunt him.

"Our first date." She remembered the memory of sharing pastries with Drex on a chilly Saturday in autumn and knew that it was his way of being cruel. She was the one who got away and Ray was the one who stole her heart from him. This was about them.

"And when he gets there, he's gonna have to deal with me." The superhero growled and ran to the tubepads, but Henry wasn't going to stand idly by. Neither was (y/n), even if Ray had been so careless with her feelings, she still wasn't going to let Drex anywhere near him.

"No, he's going to have to deal with us," Henry spoke confidently and the two sidekicks walked towards Ray with their gum tubes in hand. 

"No chance!" Ray hissed at them, scowling at the determination on their faces. This wasn't some day trip to go fight bad guys, this was gonna get bloody.

"We're going!" (y/n) snapped back, ready to have an argument with her boyfriend if he wanted one. She'd taken enough shit today.

"Forget it, you can't!" He told her sternly, making her and the boy next to her sigh furiously.

"Give us one good reason why we can't go. Give us one good reason!" Henry dared him, pushing Ray's temper even if it was a dangerous game. 

"Because, he was my sidekick and your boyfriend and now you're my sidekick and I'm your boyfriend and we're all be there together and I don't know, man, it's just gonna be weird." He ranted, trying to disguise his jealousy under some awkwardness.

"If we're going to see your sidekick, then we're going." The boy demanded, making Ray whine. He didn't want to be in this situation.

"Henry!" He groaned, not liking how both his sidekick and his girlfriend were so stubborn. It was nice to have help, but not when they refused to take no for an answer.

"Oh, just let them go." Charlotte sighed, knowing that if she didn't butt in, they'd be there all day.

"But Drex will go crazy when he sees (y/n)." He pointed out, trying to make them see that he didn't want her to be around her first boyfriend again. The one who had left him in second place.

"I'm not afraid of him! I'm with you, for better or worse." She stepped up to his height, or as near as she could get and looked him straight in the eye. Even if he thought about other girls and didn't see the relationship the same way she did, she had pledged herself to him long ago and was certain that she'd never love anyone else as much as she loved him.

"All right, fine. If you're coming with me, you better put this on." Ray caved and passed the weapon he'd received from Schwoz to her. He was with her too, for richer or for poorer, he just needed to work on his problem of saying stupid things at the wrong time and letting her know that she was the only one.

"Here, you have it. I've got a superpower, you don't." She immediately passed it to Henry, who looked at it in wonder. It looked cool, but what the hell was it?

"What's this?" He asked, strapping it to his wrist as Schwoz came over to tell him about the nitty-gritty.

"It's a glove that shoots tranquilising darts. You can use it to take down Drex." He explained and. Henry pressed a button near his thumb that made the glove extend down his arm.

"Okay, how's it works?" He asked, feeling a little unsettled at having to use a weapon he'd never seen before against a psycho like Drex. 

"Just aim it at Ray's neck and pull the trigger," Schwoz told him and Ray reluctantly offered his neck for testing. The dart pinged off his skin as expected and he felt nothing more than a sharp sting for two seconds.

"If Ray wasn't indestructible, the dart would've stuck in his neck and delivered enough hippo-grade tranquiliser to knock him out cold and we could draw a moustache on his face," (y/n) joked, but they had a small problem.

"Where'd the dart go?" Henry asked, suddenly relating that he couldn't see the red feathers anywhere on the floor. But that was probably because it hadn't fallen on the floor.

"It's right here," Charlotte slurred woozily. She had the dart sticking out of her forehead and the tranquiliser was working fast in her bloodstream. She was getting very sleepy...

"Charlotte, that's dangerous. Give it back to Schwoz." Ray told her like she wasn't about to pass out, but she plucked the dart from her head anyway and passed it to the small genius.

"Hey...has the Man Cave always been covered in glitter?" She questioned, seeing nothing but a sparkling haze as her eyes drooped shut and her legs gave in. Well, that was her unconscious.

"Aw, Charlotte's so cute when she sleeps." (y/n) smiled, liking how peaceful the girl looked. She'd not be waking up for a while though and Ray had bigger things to worry about.

"Whatever. If you're both coming with me, you better pop a gumball in your mouths and fast." He told his sidekicks begrudgingly, not wanting to lead them into danger, but they necked one anyway. 

"How will you find Drex in the bakery district?" Schwoz asked his boss as the sidekicks chewed their gum, but it was easy to answer.

"There's only one place he'd go and I know that place," Ray growled at the thought of Drex and (y/n) on their first date together and all the cupcakes and crap they ate. It made him sick to his stomach, but also thankful that she'd chosen to give him a chance.

"Okay, let's go meet your first sidekick slash boyfriend. That you used to love." Henry grumbled to both of them, not liking the details but he could ignore them to get the job done. He sure knew how to rub it in. 

"Oh, come on, I was twenty and I wanted a boyfriend! It's not my fault he turned out to be pure evil." (y/n) complained, stepping up to wrap her arms around Ray so they could share a tube. It was funny; she wanted some space but she didn't want to leave him at all and that was her with Ray all over. She just wanted to know if he was all in like her and that what they had wasn't a meaningless fling.

"You wanna say it?" Ray asked Henry, who was standing adjacently in a sulk. Geez, it wasn't easy for him to see the ex either.

"Nope. Probably wouldn't say it as good as Drex would." He grumbled, feeling second best to a guy who was evil but also had it all apparently.

"Oh god, up the tube!" (y/n) shouted and sent them all flying off. She was the one who was supposed to be sulking about exes and jealousy and now, Ray had to deal with Henry too. Today would be double the fun.

~The Bakery~

Ray cautiously burst into the store, a large blaster in his hands. He was on edge and more nervous than usual. He could only predict that in the past nine years, Drex had been getting stronger and it worried him that he had too enthusiastic yet inexperienced sidekicks behind him. 

"Y'see anything?" He asked Henry and (y/n), who had followed just after him and took a look around the bakery. There wasn't much going on and there was no one around, just bread baking in the ovens.

"Yes. I see some cakes...some breads...various pies." Henry replied, listing off every baked good he could see on the shelves.

"You know what I meant!" Ray snapped, not liking Henry's cockiness. He just needed to know if there was any sign of Drex.

"There's no one here! All right?" (y/n) rolled her eyes, but she still had a tight grasp on her blaster. She had made up a rule; when Drex was about, get your gun out, 'cause you'd definitely need it. She had no idea what she'd do if they came face-to-face with the madman, but she didn't have to worry about that yet.

"Except that dude behind the counter, talking on his phone," Henry added, gesturing to the man, who was hunched over in the corner and chattering away on his cell. 

"Hey...that dude is Mr Schneider, the owner of this bakery." Ray scolded his young sidekick. He was starting to get a little cheesed off with how moody Henry was being and the kid's grumpy attitude was unusual for him.

"Oh, big whiff." Henry scoffed, not caring about some dumb baker and his pies.

"It is a big whiff!" The superhero hissed back, forcing (y/n) to stand in between them to keep the peace.

"Okay, okay. Let's just leave it, all right?" She told them both, making Henry back off just a bit, but he was still tetchy.

"Why are we here?" He questioned, not seeing why they had to stand around like idiots and wait for a guy who might or might not turn up. All this crap, just for a grudge.

"Look, I know Drex is coming here. (y/n) loves this bakery...and he still loves her." Ray revealed, growing sombre at the thought of his girlfriend's ex still being hung up about her. Drex was convinced that Ray had stolen (y/n) from him, but it wasn't like that at all. She had realised several months into the relationship that she saw nothing happening with Drex and she was in love with someone else. In the name of being honest, she had tried to come clean with him so they could split amicably, but let's just say that Drex didn't take the news that his boss had caught the eye of the young girl very well.

"How do you know that?" (y/n) asked him, wondering how on earth he'd know that Drex still held a candle for her. She had a few suspicions, mainly because he was a nutjob and had never taken the breakup well, but she'd never discussed it with her new love.

"Uh, 'cause Drex and I used to come—-" Ray mumbled and his words blurred together until they were incomprehensible. He didn't like this; Henry was jealous and (y/n) was walking back into Drex's trap. Everyone's first love always stays in a special place and Ray was worried that by some terrible miracle, he'd fall foul of Drex and his status as her first kiss, her first boyfriend, her first everything. Would she remember the thrill that her younger self did? Would she leave an old idiot like him for a younger, stronger man?

"What? Did, uh...you and Drex used to come here? Together?" Henry pressed Ray, who was feeling corned by all the questions. 

"Yeah, okay, yes. We came here a couple times." Ray sighed, hoping that Henry wouldn't be too hurt. They did stuff together too, it was just one of those things. Drex had been his friend for a while and friends go out together and eat pastries, no biggie.

"So like, twice?" Henry asked, thinking that twice in their entire friendship was...okay. He still wasn't happy with Ray having another sidekick, but as long as he knew it wasn't a regular thing, he'd be able to deal with it.

"Yeah, twice...twice a week," Ray added and the sheer frequency of their little bakery dates made Henry see red.

"What?" He gasped, feeling like all Ray was doing was lying to him. Twice a week for six months was way too often for his liking and it stung to know that their partnership was that close.

"Look, I'm not talkin' about this anymore!" Ray groaned, wanting the conversation to end there. Yes, Drex had been his sidekick, he couldn't deny that anymore, but he'd moved on and now, he had Henry Hart and (y/n) (y/l/n) as the only sidekicks he needed and wanted.

"Well, good." Henry pouted and Ray walked past him since they were both moody now. Honestly, they were like an old married couple.

"You two are terrible." (y/n) tutted, but all of sudden, Ray wasn't listening. He'd spotted something tantalisingly tasty on the counter and they were free...

"Oh, wow." He gasped softly, not believing that he had chanced upon some free nut clusters, also known as, Ray Manchester's favourite snack.

"What?" Henry asked when he heard the amazement in his boss's voice and wondered what had caught his attention now. 

"Nut clusters!" Ray squealed, making (y/n) groan. They were a menace and his kryptonite, well, his second kryptonite.

"I'm sorry...what?" Henry questioned, frowning at the odd name. Why was he getting so excited about a dumb nut cluster? They were in a bakery, of course, there would be sweet stuff around.

"It says, free nut clusters, just reach in hole." He read out the sign on the box, feeling his excitement build at the prospect of scoffing the lot.

"What's a nut cluster?" Henry asked, having never heard of anything like that, which was surprising considering how crazy Ray was for them. 

"Oh, man! Imagine if a cookie and brownie got married, fell into a pool full of caramel, and then just rolled around in a big old sack of nuts." Ray smiled and wiggled his fingers in preparation for snack time. It was nut cluster time and they had an appointment in his belly.

"Wait, wait! Did Drex know how much you loved nut clusters?" Henry suddenly had a troubling thought and (y/n) could see what he was driving at. Ray though, not so much.

"Aw, kid, you gotta stop bein' so jealous." He sighed and gently shook his head at Henry. The boy knew that coming from him, it meant zilch, nada, nothing, but luckily, he had a pretty young woman on hand, who was an expert at getting Ray to open his ears.

"Ray, he's not jealous. What if...what if this is a trap?" She asked softly, setting the idea going in his head. It was a possibility and she really didn't want to see him hurt or captured. She wanted him to stay with her, forever.

"Oh...okay." Ray took a second to mull the problem over and then promptly sneezed loudly. Oh god, now (y/n) remembered why she tried to ween him off them.

"Doofus, you're allergic to nuts, don't go near them!" She whined, not liking how he made himself miserable for days on end just for a few minutes of pleasure. She'd have to come up with a better alternative in the future if she wanted him to resist the caramel, chocolatey goodness. 

"But I don't care." He replied, making her fall into a moody silence. She just wanted to look out for him, but he wouldn't listen. 'Maybe he'd listen to Henry's hot mom.' She thought bitterly, feeling like, for some reason, she was losing him. She'd seen this happen so many times with his flings and fancies, a brief interest and then the discarding. However, she'd always thought that with her, he was different and he genuinely wanted things to work. She wanted to be his one.

"Wait, no, no, no! What if it's a trap?!" Henry repeated his and (y/n)'s point, feeling extremely worried that they were walking themselves into crisis. 

"Oh, okay...we'll each just get one nut cluster." Ray compromised, thinking that a little nibble couldn't hurt.

"No, no nut clusters for anyone. Don't put your hand in the—-" (y/n) begged him, but Ray was like a child with a candy jar, he just couldn't help but reach in. As soon as he had his wrist through the space, a mechanism clamped around his hand, making him squirm to get free. Oh, shit.

"Okay, what just happened?" Henry asked him, seeing him struggle against the box. His panic was taking off and he got the picture that they were in trouble.

"I dunno...I can't pull my hand out. That's weird." He chuckled nervously, making (y/n) move over to see if she could help loosen the lock.

"Why can't you just leave well alone when I tell you to?" She grumbled at him and began to poke around the box. She wrapped her fingers around his wrist and tried to yank him out, but it was no good. He was well and truly struck. It was time to try a hairpin, but she wasn't sure that it would work either. Drex wouldn't be fooled by something so simple and that freaked her out.

"I told you it could be a trap." Henry groaned, shaking his head and tutting at his boss. Just once, he wished that he had listened. He and (y/n) weren't doing it to be stick-in-the-muds, they just saw the danger and wanted to stay away.

"It's probably just broken. Y'know, defective." Ray responded, believing that they were being overly cautious and dramatic. He was Captain Man, he knew what he was doing. Probably.

"Your brain is defective, I can't pick the lock." The young woman sighed and gave up trying to trick the lock into springing open. She was beat and Ray was still in schtuck.

"Here, let's try a peanut butter one." Ray was hurt by her annoyance with him no decided that a chocolate nut thing would heal the pain. Her love would be better, but he didn't want to upset her anymore.

"No, don't put your other hand—" Henry was too late to warm him and predictably, the box locked Ray's other hand parallel to his other. 

"Man, both these holes are defective." He shrugged, trying to keep his cool, although things were starting to look more and more trap-like.

"It's a trap!" Henry exclaimed as he and (y/n) rubbed their temples in frustration. Nothing ever went right for them, not when Ray's childish side was running the show.

"Who for?!" He asked in return, not seeing the bigger picture. He was in denial and it showed.

"Oh, I dunno...you? Us? Any idiot who's dumb enough to stick their hands in those holes?!" (y/n) retorted, her voice laced with sarcasm. 

"Well, I'm sorry, sweetness. Henry, go tell Mr Schneider to call a handyman before (y/n) bites my head off." Ray instructed his younger sidekick. He didn't know why she was angry with him, but he thought it was a bit unfair to pin the blame solely on him. The nut clusters were partially to blame.

"'Kay. Hey...Mr Schneider, can you call a handyman? 'Cause my friend's girlfriend is gonna kill him—ah! Ahhhh! Ah!" Henry did as he was told and put a friendly hand on the baker's shoulder, but to his horror, his head wobbled and fell from his shoulders. The boy jumped back in shock and his terrified screams drew the attention of the bickering couple. 

"His head just fell off of his body!" Henry shrieked at them and began to hyperventilate as he thought about how he'd be spending the rest of his life in jail for decapitating an innocent baker.

"Calm down! Calm down! Obviously, that's probably not the real Mr Schneider." Ray theorised, keeping his sidekick calm as he thought about what to do. This was bad, really bad. If that was a dummy, then that meant...

"Ray, I'm scared...something's wrong." (y/n) whimpered, pushing aside her insecurity so she could be honest with him. Her gut was right, the situation was about to go from bad to worse. The door opened and in walked a man with blonde hair, dark clothes, a black bandage tied across his forehead and an evil smirk on his face. Drex.

"You," Ray growled and tried to shift his shoulder in front of (y/n) so he could shield her from that monster, but it was a bit tricky when both of his hands were locked up.

"You." Drex snarled in return and glared at Ray as he tried to hide his girl away. She had just gotten distracted, that's all. She was his, she loved him and if he couldn't have her, then no one could, especially not Captain Man.

"Who?" Henry looked so confused, but Ray was too busy trying to get free to answer any questions. Like this, he was useless and his darling girl and faithful sidekick were in serious danger.

"Drex." (y/n) swallowed and tried to keep her face free from fear. She was terrified of him, even with her newfound confidence and superpower. She still remembered how rough his hands were when he threatened her into submission and it had left her so quiet for so many years. She didn't want to go back to that or see Henry hurt.

"There's my little cupcake, still sweet for me. And poor Ray, did you want a nut cluster?" His smooth, sinister voice made her shiver and she clenched her fists to stop them shaking when he started to walk closer.

"Don't talk to her! And you know I did...Tease." Ray glared at his enemy, hating how he was deliberately making moves on his girl more than any mockery that was pushed his way. He'd die before he lost her, he couldn't bear to live a loveless life without her again.

"Why shouldn't I talk to my girl? After all, I loved her first and she was such a good little thing for me. My cupcake." Drex chuckled and stepped towards the stony-faced woman as Henry circled around him. (y/n) watched his every move and Ray jerked against his restraints as his girlfriend was subjected to the leering gaze of Drex. No man could have her, she was his, he'd waited too long finally have her in his bed at night, calling out his name. One finger on her blemish-free skin and there would be hell to pay.

"Henry, use the thing!" (y/n) directed the young boy and he nodded from behind Drex. 

"Okay, that's it, jerk! On the ground, right now!" Henry ordered the criminal, pointing the tranquilliser glove directly at the man's neck. It was primed and ready for firing, but Drex was uncaring. Truly, he couldn't be happier. He had his perfect girl metres away from him, quivering in his presence, the man who took her away from him rendered helpless and an inexperienced boy left to stand alone.

"Mmmm, what a nice pie. Share a slice with me?" Drex offered him, but he was being anything but kind. This was one of his mind games.

"Maybe I want my own slice." Henry shrugged, not trusting the man for a moment. 

"Kid, stay away from him," Ray warned the boy, fearing for his safety as Drex waited for Henry's first move. He might be calm now, but the man was a monster and Henry was so unaware of what he was facing.

"Why? We gotta take this guy in." Henry replied, keeping his disgusted expression. But then, something unexpected happened.

"Don't move! This is a robbery! Now, I want everybody to—ah, geez." Two robbers kicked the door open and stormed into the bakery, but they were stopped in their tracks by the sight of three superheroes already embroiled in a fight.

"It's Captain Man, Miss Danger and Kid Danger." One of the robbers whispered to his friend and they both gulped at the sight of the heroes catching them red-handed.

"Both of you, on the ground!" (y/n) instructed the men sharply and pointed her blaster at them confidently as she tried to move closer to Henry. But Drex wouldn't have her being so brave, he wanted her to fall into line like she had done nine years ago when she idolised him. 

"Shush, cupcake. I don't want to hear anything from your honey lips." His voice was supposed to be soft, but it held a darkness that made her falter. That was how he kept his control, cruelty disguised as kindness. Ray tugged his hands in the box at the reference to what her kisses tasted like and it enraged him to know that Drex was up to his old tricks. He didn't deserve to know her so intimately, she deserved the softest treatment, not this pig-headed bully.

"Hello, idiots. Would either of you morons like to share my pie?" Drex asked the two thieves, who weren't too happy about being insulted, but they'd picked the wrong villain to mess with.

"I don't like your attitude!" The thief in a beanie snarled at Drex, who was scared about some dumbass who was an amateur at the art he had honed.

"Well then...do something." Drex dared them to make a move and the beanie man threw a strong punch at his face. Henry and (y/n) flinched at the violent impact and were disturbed to see how it barely phased Drex. What would knock most men out was like a small tickle to him and he then calmly proceeded to dish out their punishment. Without dropping his pie, the psycho brutally kicked the men to the floor, ending their burglary before it had even begun.

"Scary. I almost dropped my pie." He joked psychotically, turning to face the three spooked superheroes. He was insane and he was enjoying how he was unsettling them.

"Now, where were we? Ah, yes. You and I were about to fight." Drex smirked at Henry, who looked to (y/n) with a pale face. She didn't want him to be kicked so harshly and to be honest, neither did he.

"Good...I just need to use the restroom first." Henry lied, trying to buy himself a few minutes to come up with a plan. Without Ray, he wasn't sure if he and (y/n) would survive. His silence and anxiousness told the evil asshole that the kid would be easy to break and if he was broken, (y/n) would be his for the taking. 

"So, Captain Man, I hear that you've been messing around with my girl." Drex seethed, looking between the couple and noticing the way (y/n) instinctively returned to his side when she was frightened. Of course, Ray had stolen her away from him and now, he was going to pay.

"She's my girl now. She doesn't want you." Ray glowered at him and (y/n) stood proudly next to his side. It was true, she hadn't even thought about Drex for so many years and there was only one man she wanted now and he was the one defending her honour.

"Oh, really? She wants you? The guy who makes her scrub floors and live in fear? You've never been able to stick to one girl, she's just another plaything for you." Drex accused, reading the insecurities in the relationship like an open book. Even after ten years apart, he still knew Ray's ways and the role (y/n) had in the Man Cave. Ray thought that he was holding her back and she thought he would ultimately lose interest in her; there was trust but also doubt, which was a dangerous combination when it was being provoked by the man who wanted to see the relationship burn.

"I love her and only her. I...I just want her to be happy." Ray growled back, staring at Drex like a cornered animal. His heart was open and every insult was calculated to sting where he was most vulnerable. He wasn't the playboy everyone thought he was, all his life he had been waiting for one woman to be the one and the moment he had her, the frivolous dates stopped. He didn't want anyone else, just her, but he was still aware that because of him, she lived a challenging life. He was sure that whilst no one would love her as he did, some other guy could give her a peaceful life, where no villains would threaten her in a bakery.

"And that's what she'd be with me. She'd never get hurt or upset, she'd be loved. More than you ever could." Drex hissed, preying closer and closer on Ray in his cruel torture. Why fight when you can mentally wreck your opponent into giving up? Not that they were, one girl wasn't going to be trampled over and lectured to about how happy she was with the man she chose.

"No." She told Drex coldly and cocked the blaster that was still being pointed at him. Who was he to tell her who could give her a good life? She wasn't a prize to be won and was more than happy in the life she lived. She was a superhero's girlfriend, for god's sake!

"Be quiet, (y/n). I'm talking." Drex snapped at her, not used to hearing her backchat. He'd have to sort out that problem after this was finished.

"That's funny, 'cause so am I, so how about you listen to me? I don't care if I scrub floors or fix machines and have to fight assholes like you, because I have a damn good life. I have great friends and a great boyfriend. Even if he looks at hot moms or supermodels and leaves me behind, I know he's the only one for me, not you. So, get on the ground before I shoot your ass." She glared at him and stepped forward so the blaster was less than a metre away from his chest. 

Ray couldn't believe how courageous she was or how happy she was living with him. It broke his heart to learn that she was still intimidated by the mistakes he'd made in his past and he was cursing his younger self for putting her through so much heartache just so he could be selfish. He wanted to get down on his knees and tell her until his words dried up that he would never even think about anyone else. His stupid words had left her unsure of his love for her and he felt like he'd broken his promise. His girl was hurt and it was thanks to him.

"So, Captain Man, before I spank your boyish sidekick and put MY girl in her place...some pie?" Drex's rage was reaching the surface and seeing a formally compliant girl so defiant made him see red.

"Nobody wants your filthy pie," Ray growled, hating what he was being put through. God, he just wanted to break free and throttle Drex for even thinking he could go near (y/n) again. He wouldn't allow it, not after how far she'd come from the unassertive girl he'd abandoned. 

"You're done, Drex," Henry told the criminal and it was obvious that he was vastly underestimating the extent to which Drex would go. He wouldn't stop just because he was a boy, in fact, it just made him easier to beat.

"Careful, kid." (y/n) warned him, not liking how close Henry was getting to Drex. 

"Why?! I'm the one with the cool thing on my wrist." Henry exclaimed. God, he just wanted to kick some ass. Surely, it couldn't be that bad, his famous last words. Drex took advantage of Henry's brief distraction and yanked the tranquillising glove from Henry's hand. Oh shit, that was Henry rendered useless.

"That's why." (y/n) sighed, feeling the blood drain away from her face as Henry stood there without a weapon.

"Fetch, boy!" Drex taunted Henry and threw the glove out of the door so Henry would have to run and retrieve it. It was humiliating, but that was Drex all over. Knowing that he needed the tranquilliser more than anything, Henry sprinted to get it from the bushes outside, leaving Ray and (y/n) alone with their former friend.

"You will show me respect!" Henry hissed at Drex as he stomped past, but the man didn't give a shit. He just fake-yawned and slammed the door shut.

"Now, old friend...I have a gift for you. And for my cupcake. She's always loved the little gifts I get her." Drex growled and Ray and (y/n) stepped in front of her boyfriend protectively. The psychotic guy leaned past her and reached into a cupboard so he could bring out a box, helmet thing.

"What is that? Some kind of crazy box with a wide-hose bottom?" Ray asked as he continued to wriggle his hands in the holes. He'd had enough of boxes, thank you.

"Whatever it is, we don't want your gifts, Drex." (y/n) stated in a cold voice, but he just smirked at her. She was so cute thinking that she stood a chance.

"You'll take whatever I give you, cupcake." Drex bellowed in her face and swiftly jabbed her in the neck before she could blink. (y/n) stumbled back and hissed at the sharp prick she felt in her neck.

"What the fuck have you done to me?—-" She slurred and suddenly, her mind felt woozy and the room was spinning. Her fingers ran down her throat until they came to a small metal needle sticking out her skin and she yanked it out. She held it up to the light and Ray's temper exploded when her legs turned to jelly and gave in.

"What did you do to her, Drex?!" The superhero yelled in pure rage as his girl slumped to the floor and battled to keep her eyes open. She wanted her legs to move but they weren't listening, all she could do was mumble incoherently.

"Good girls stay quiet and that hypnotic sedative will make her go to sleep for me." Drex petted her hair "lovingly" and (y/n) did her best to jerk away from his touch. She had to stay awake, she just had to.

"Drex, I swear, if you hurt her..." Ray warned him in a dangerously calm voice, but everyone could hear his anger. His muscles were tense and if his hands were free, he'd be raining down hundreds of punches to Drex's face for even thinking that (y/n) would ever be forced to love him.

"M'okay, Ray. Just gotta heal--need to heal..." (y/n) panted, willing herself to sober up quickly. Her toes felt fuzzy and she could almost wiggle them, but she was a long way off getting back on her feet.

"Why don't I show you what this does?" Drex nodded his head to the box, helmet thing that was still in his hands and raised it over his head so he could slot it onto Ray's, who wasn't too keen on the light's being turned out.

"No. D-D-Drex! Don't do it, Drex! No, I mean it!" Ray panicked and bent down as far as he could to try and avoid the box being locked onto his head. Henry was thumping his fist against the glass of the door, but he couldn't get in. The door was locked and (y/n) was out of action, leaving Ray defenceless.

"Leave him, Drex...M'not gonna let you hurt him..." (y/n) mumbled slowly, trying to get her fingers to twitch to life around her blaster. God, this was like torture, she could see and hear everything, but her paralysis meant that she was useless.

"Leave him alone!" Henry's muffled voice could faintly be heard in the shop, but there was nothing that they could do to help their leader. Drex put the box over Ray's head and flicked a switch on the back, illuminating it and telling him that Captain Man was now good for nothing.

"Uh, Drex? What just happened, Drex?" Ray asked from inside his new prison and he had to rely on his hearing alone. 

"Drex, let me in!" Henry demanded, whacking his hands on the glass pane as he watched on helplessly. (y/n) was now able to slightly flex her ankles up and down and her fingers were starting to creak into life, but it wasn't enough.

"Hang on, we have a customer." The villain smirked and dashed over to unlock the door. He didn't care if Henry could move around the shop now, Ray couldn't help him, neither could Miss Danger, perfect.

"Captain Man! Captain Man! What is—what is this? Are you okay?!" Henry ran to his boss's side and his eyes grew in fear when he saw (y/n) almost lifeless on the floor and Ray totally blind.

"Is (y/n) okay, kid? Where is she?" Ray ignored the questions about himself and focused on his girl instead. The last time he'd seen, she was on the floor with Drex leaning over her and now he was panicking for his sidekicks' safety.

"I'm still here, doofus. And good news, I can move my hands and neck now. How about you?" She replied for herself, her voice much clearer now the drug was being combated by her super-regeneration. Just a few more minutes, that's all she needed and then she'd be back in action.

"I can't see, sweet girl! Henry, help me get this thing off my head!" Ray instructed his sidekick, feeling relieved that she was okay and on the mend. It meant that he could focus on his problem, not being able to move his hands or see a damn thing.

"Stop smirking, you prick." (y/n) lolled her head in Drex's direction and glared at him whilst Henry tugged and pulled at the box. She hated how smug he looked and wobbled her leg a bit to try and get it to move. Her weak limb just flopped over the other one and she grumbled at how useless she felt. 

"Kid? Kid, what's happening?" Ray asked when he felt Henry let go. The boy had seen Drex's cocky face and knew that the box wouldn't be coming off soon, so he might as well test out the glove on him. A taste of his own medicine, that's what he needed.

"Henry, watch it, he's sneaky!" (y/n) warned him and gasped when Henry fired a dart at Drex, only for the criminal to pick up the pie and deflect the tranquilliser with the metal dish. Sneaky indeed. Henry fired two more shots, both blocked on each try and Henry gulped when he pressed the trigger again and was met with a beep. He was out of ammo.

"So...are things going well?" Ray asked his sidekicks, who panicked as Drex stepped forward and squared up to Henry. 'Come on legs, I need you to work!' (y/n) thought in worry as she tried to get her torso and hips to wake up. 

"Uh, no not really. (y/n)'s still floppy." Henry replied shakily as he backed away from Drex and the woman could only watch in terror as the boy tried to keep away from harm.

"You need to get out of here!" She advised him, seeing that with no one to help him, Henry was at a serious disadvantage and at risk of being beaten to a pulp.

"Agreed." He gulped and quickly shuffled towards the door. The couple would be fine, hopefully. Once (y/n) got her legs back then they could think of a plan, but for now, Henry needed to get to safety.

"Don't worry about us! Get out of here!" Ray shouted, agreeing with his girl that there was nothing Henry could do here to help. It was a mistake to bring him along, not that it was worth complaining about now.

"That's an order!" (y/n) insisted, not liking that how he was still being chased around the store by the deranged criminal. 

"I'm completely on board!" Henry answered, shuffling around a table as a crowd gathered outside the bakery. Adults and children alike were marvelling at the site of their favourite superheroes in action, but they were unknowingly providing a stage for Drex to humiliate them.

"Hey! What's going on in there?!" A cop banged on the door and peered into the store when he and his patterned passed and spotted the ruckus going on. 

"Hahaha, woo! Hey, Drex, looks like you're going back to jail." Henry chuckled in the criminal's face and pointed to the police officers outside the building. It was nice to have backup, but this was the Swellview Police and they were notoriously crap.

"Oh, man! It's Drex!" They cried and legged it when the villain turned around and scowled at them. One look, that's all it took and they were running for their lives, leaving Henry alone again.

"Uh...I think you're supposed to follow those cops." The boy awkwardly told his enemy, who was thoroughly amused by the situation. The police were terrified of him, meaning they wouldn't be a problem.

"Get him, Kid Danger!" A young boy yelled from outside and his enthusiasm set off the crowd's cheers. They thought that Kid Danger could beat anyone, but they didn't know Drex.

"You heard 'em. Get me." Drex dared Henry, who tried the tranquillising glove one more time before harshly discarding it when he knew it was futile. It was time to get physical.

Henry stormed forward and threw two punches at Drex, who blocked them instantly. He was fast and experienced, so Henry switched tactics and tried to send a kick to his stomach, but his foot was grabbed by Drex and shoved back. As Ray struggled and (y/n) rolled around to get on her feet, Drex grabbed Henry's weaker body and forced him into a large cooking vat. 

"Kid Danger!" (y/n) gasped as she tried to use the counter to pull herself up, but her muscles were still unresponsive when she willed them to start working, so it was to Ray to bring the action. He grunted and strained, pulling with all his might until his superhero strength was enough to yank the box from where it was nailed to the counter.

"Miss Danger! Where are you?!" He shouted, spinning wildly around as he tried to search for his girl and a tap on his leg gave him an answer.

"Down here. I'm still floppy, but it's getting better." She replied, rolling her shoulders to loosen them up. Okay, she was nearly back to normal and it was agonising to wait and do nothing. How strong was this sedative?

"Where's Kid Danger?" He asked next, stumbling down her body clumsily as he tried to not do her any more damage by treading on her arms or anything. Geez, you don't miss your sight until you don't have it.

"I'm afraid he's a little battered and bruised right now." Drex quipped, confusing Ray with idiomatic phrasing. He really didn't need any hidden meanings right now.

"What does that mean?! Are you being literal or is that wordplay?!" He questioned, taking a few baby steps to see if he was walking into the room and not into a wall.

"He's in a cake batter vat thing." (y/n) groaned as she grappled herself onto the counter and hauled herself up. The sudden movement made her head spin again, but she was determined to stay up, even if it meant she was practically half-laid on the surface.

"Drex? Where are you, Drex?!" Ray growled at the information and bashed his boxed hands against a table. Whether he was trying to get them free or taking a stab in the dark in the hopes of whacking Drex was anyone's guess, but all it resulted in was Ray cracking a chuck of table off. Not his best idea ever.

"Well, you certainly showed that table." Drex hissed, making Ray panic when he realised that the map he had of the room in his head was getting harder to focus on. Had the floor always been this big and how many tables were there again? Was the counter in front or behind him?

"Kid? Kid Danger?" Ray called out for Henry, but his voice was muffled by all the gooey batter in his face and it left Ray open to Drex's tricks.

"Oh no, Kid Danger just ran out the door." He lied and opened it so he could fool Ray into going outside. 

"Hang on, kid, I'm comin'!" He cried as (y/n) blanched at how easily he was trusting Drex's word. She stuttered in shock as she watched him crash through the tables and into a wall. It was painful to see as well as painful to endure.

"Ow! That's not right. Uh, where's the exit? Is this the exit?" He rambled as he drunkenly headed towards the door. Oh shit, no, no, no!

"Ray, don't listen to him! Kid Danger's right here—oh, god!" (y/n)'s eyes widened as Drex slammed the door shut and locked them in with no Captain Man, no police and a gang of spectators with their phones out.

"Hello? Oh god, I'm so sticky! I need some paper towels. Paper towels?" Henry suddenly emerged from the cakey darkness and (y/n) gulped when she saw how disoriented he was. His entire upper body was caked in a thick, vanilla cement and it clung to him in a disgusting embrace. Things weren't all about the batter though, because now that he had literally shoved Ray away, Drex was able to make his dastardly move on Henry.

"Put him down, Drex!" (y/n) snarled as she pulled herself away from the counter and tried to reach out and help the poor boy, but her knees gave in again just when she needed them. Damn this drug, even with her healing, it was taking a good fifteen minutes to get it out of her bloodstream, but she didn't have the time to wait.

"No, I don't think I will, cupcake," Drex smirked and seized the young superhero by his collar and tunic so he could lift his body and sit down on a vacant chair. With Henry's body laid across his lap, the humiliation could begin.

"Spanky, Spanky, spank your butt, doo-dah, doo-dah. Spanky, spanky, spank your butt, oh dah doo dah day!" Henry was close to tears as he watched the kids pull out their phones and laugh at him. It didn't hurt, not even close, but the jeers and heartless giggles were the cruellest things he'd ever had to go through. 

"He's just a kid, leave him alone! Hurt me, just don't hurt him!" (y/n) urged her loathed ex-boyfriend, not being able to bear seeing the children and their parents enjoy Henry's pain. Sometimes she forgot how unkind people could be and that's what Drex always played on. The world would never be as kind to her as she was to it, allowing him to exploit its harshness. 

"Cupcake, I've heard and observed your little superpower, another one of Captain Man's tricks. You can't get hurt, well, not yet. I'll see to you later." He jibed at her, his face twisting into a sneer at the thought of the girl who used to be his spending her life with the man he had sworn to kill. Nine years in jail had given him a lot of time to think; all those times he saw Ray eat with (y/n), work with (y/n), laugh with (y/n), that was him drawing her away. His plan all along, steal his girl because that's what Captain Man does, but not again.

"You bastard..." She growled and crawled along the floor in their direction, hoping to do something, anything. This was working out rather well for Drex. Ray was neutralised and no longer his concern; Kid Danger's spirit was seconds away from being broken and (y/n)? She was fiery and defiant, something that had infected her from too much time spent in the Man Cave, but she'd learn. Drex was determined to make her his perfect little doll again and Ray Manchester wouldn't stop him.

How were they gonna get out of this one?

[autistic-crypt1d]

Stargate (1994) live blogging:

Ok so I'm a huge fan of the SG-1 and Atlantis shows and have watched them in double digit amounts each, but I haven't seen the original movie since I was like 7. I'm about to rewatch SG-1 again and I've decided to finally watch it again, here's my thoughts!

Updates:

- I'm nervous because all I remember is that I hated it which is why I never watched it again

- good lord this is a long ass intro

- ahhhh the did a shorter version for the show, I see

- did little Catherine just steal that necklace, girl wtf

- I miss my Daniel :(

- I miss my O'Neill :(

- yeesh, didn't realize how soon after his son's death this took place

- wow that was the worst sneeze I've ever heard in my life

- he's so tiny oh my god

- LUCIUS??? NO, GET OUTTA HERE, SHOO

- bro the sound mixing is killing me, Daniel is so fucking soft spoken compared to not only everyone else but the damn chalk he's drawing with

- he sounds horrifyingly identical to show Daniel

- "I'm Colonel Jack O'Neill", NUH UH

- pfffft, just yoinks his paper

- I can't look at Daniel in this outfit without immediately thinking of Anakin

- Daniel why would you draw on the screen

- I wonder why Catherine had an accent in the movie but not the show

- I'm currently unable to remember how this fits with the reveal of Earnest in that one episode

- ooooo the stargate is so much more water like here, it's even reflective

- Kaliam galaxy? That makes no sense, until the Ancient database episode, we're told it's impossible to dial outside of our galaxy without a serious amount of power like a ZPM aren't we? That's the whole reason Jack had to build that device in the ancient database episode and why they couldn't dial Atlantis again.

- she gave him the stolen necklace, how touching (sarcasm)

- does the stargate look bigger here or am I remembering wrong

- I'm so glad we got the Jack O'Neill we did, oof

- wtf is up with that stargate depiction

- why are they frosty and damp

- "that's a nice tent. Oh, we each get a rent, nice." Ah Daniel

- Ferretti, you such, and so do the rest of your buddies. The way he made fun of Jackson and threw the case at him only to then look back at his buddies for approval like the spineless jackass he is

- WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT

- NO SERIOUSLY WHAT IS THAT THING

- WHY HAVE WE NOT EVER SEEN THAT IN THE SHOW, WHERE WAS OUR WEIRD ALIEN FAUNA STUFF HUH???

- the captions spelled Jack's last name wrong *tsk tsk*

- of course Daniel gets dragged away by the weird alien thing

- oh shit it's the same Skaara!

- everyone being in neat lines is weirding me out

- oh boy, hate everyone kneeling for him, that's uncomfy

- ok wtf is that scanner thing cuz we sure as hell never see that again

- these creatures are clearly very prevalent in their society, it sucks so much we never see them in the show!!!

- and the same guy who plays Sha'uri's father!

- and we never see this much of their architecture again either! We only see tents as far as I can remember but they had this whole impressive city!!!

- I don't really understand why they would set up basecamp out in the open instead of inside the pyramid

- OOF that is a big ass storm

- another creature we never see again!!!!

- pffft there goes Daniel being taken again

- bro is being HANDLED

- oh dear

- oh man she looks like she's gonna cry, poor girl being offered up like that

- uh oh

- I have to say, the ship looks fucking AMAZING, respect given how old this movie is

- WOAH, THAT MASK IS SICK

- bitch the jack o'neill I know and love would NEVER, EVER give a child a cigarette and he would never teach him to smoke it either!!!

- OOOF, the gun reaction, ouch

- aw man them learning to communicate in the cave is so cute help

- hot damn this sarcophagus is like a blion times cooler wtf

- hang on a sec, wtf was the alien depicted in the walls, it looks like a freaky Asgard

- PFFFFT, not the band of kids following them back XD

- DUDE WHY ARE THE MAAKS SO MUCH COOLER

- the staff blasts and effects are ROUGH

- has Daniel literally ever fired a gun in his life at this point?

- also, why're there Horus and Jackall guards here?

- uhhhh, do the ships ever open again? I don't remember that happening

- the throne room is much more throne roomy in the movie than the show

- uhhhhh why are all his servants children

- oh wow that mask removal cgi is rough

- aaaaand Ra also looks like a child for some reason

- WHY ARE ALL THE SERVANTS NOT ONLY CHILDREN, BUT PRETTY MUCH NAKED

- does Daniel die here and get revied in the sarcophagus? He does that a lot so I'm not sure

- ah yeah, sarcophagus

- I'm so uncomfortable rn

- LET'S GO SHA'URI AND SKAARA

- the Jaffa don't seem to have symbiote pouches

- Daniel that wasn't really an explicit invitation

- "cover me!" "cover you?!?!?!"

- Sha'uri dies and comes back too?? Man what a couple

- PFFFFT that ring transporter effect

- it really sucks that he saves her only for her to become possessed by a Goa'uld for the rest of her life

- doesn't make much sense for them to be wearing the big ass helmets while in the death gliders

- what the hell is up with his face glowing and the alien face being beneath his???? Huh???? Did they just like, change their mind about what the Goa'uld were once they started making the show?? But why would the one Jaffa that was left at the SGC have a symbiote pouch??? I'm so confused

- ok well at least she seems to like him back but still

Pretty good movie overall, but I don't think I ever wanna watch it again cuz the kids thing is hella fucking weird, but I understand the show a lot more now! Except for the parts that make no sense because they made hella lore changes between this and the show.

[nerdyvocals]

@look-at-those-niceass-rocks and I finished our watch (their first, my... eighth???) of Julie and the Phantoms the other day (*cough* over a week ago *cough*), and like the previous two times, we had some unhinged things to say about it. This one's a bit shorter as we only had episodes 8 and 9 left, but if you enjoy our dumbassery, rest assured, we'll be watching the Descendants franchise next!

Honorable mention: us spending the first 20 minutes of our call trying to find the first two posts because the blog search engine simply Does Not Work.

Captions: [Whimsical music plays] Me: Whimsical music GAYS, OHHHHHHH

*Flashback of the Hotdog Incident (tm)* Bee: Street meat street meat street meat Me: Are you saying "straight meat"??? Bee: NO!

Ray Molina : *is very engaged with his son's ghost dip theory* Bee: The Bandit Heeler energy on this man

Julie: *outside the Patterson's house* Me: Do you have tissues?? Bee: Uhhh, yeah, next to me? Me: Good Bee: Oh boy

*cue lots of sniffling over Unsaid Emily*

Bee: You can tell their prefrontal lobes stopped developing at 17 Me: Yeah, I guess that happens when you die? Brain stops growing?? Bee: hehehe brain machine broke

Julie: What the heck??? Me: Let Julie say fuck! Bee: Of all the characters, Julie should get to say fuck

Me: Finale time! Any predictions? Bee: Oh god, I don't think I could outdo the pink ladies one, uhhh

Bee then spends the next minute and a half being a prophet (in a sense): 1. Alex is going to get a very dramatic on-screen kiss with Seth Clearwater because otherwise I will be Upset 2. In the same way they become Real-or like. Where people can see them-when they play, they will find a way to be corporeal where they can touch each other 3. I think there should be a dance fight with-oh, fuck, what's his name? Evil ghost man?? With his Ghost Cocaine???

Alex and Willie: *emotional hug* Me: WAIT PAUSE. *zooms in on Alex's hand* I think I have that ring. Bee: Riveting.

The boys: *trying to get the PATD opener gig* Promoter: *freaking out* Assistant: *unbothered* Me: A lesbian and an incel are trapped in an office together. Bee: The incel is going to get eaten. Me: And not in the way he wants!

Julie: *having a cry in the alley* Me: I wonder how much they had to pay to keep that Subway sign in the background.

Julie: *takes dahlia from the street vendor* Bee: Truffula tree lookin-ass flower.

Bee: Also I didn't want to ruin that beautiful moment, but all I could think of was "mom come pick me up I'm scared."

Me: this poor tech guy is Going Through It (tm)

Carrie: Been here before Trevor: *Bombastic side eye* Bee: HA that look said, "Damn, I really forgot to parent this girl"

Nick: *Jamming* Us: GO FEDORA KID!!!

Me @ Trevor: That man is going to pass out

Me, as the Boys are appearing: See, I've always wondered what was going on in the ghost club side of this scene, cause look, their costumes are missing pieces! Alex's shirt is open, Reggie's jacket is just gone! Bee: Oh yeah Me: Like it's probably just a storytelling choice to show they're where they want to be via clothes, 'cause this is more in line with how they dress normally, but it does make me wonder what we're missing. Like is there a fight? Luke: *appearing* Me: See his sleeves got ripped off! How and why? Bee: They did that for us. You, specifically Me: *cackling*

Julie and Luke: *crying, about to hug* Me, noticing that Luke's pants Fit Very Well: Not the most important thing happening here, but uh, dat ass tho

After rewinding the scene a bit because it didn't hit Bee in the moment that They Were Hugging Bee: I was so caught up in the euphoria of a good butt that for a moment, I lived in a world where they weren't ghosts

Julie + Phantoms: We played the Orpheum! Me: Saved by the power of friendship! Bee: And this man's ass!

Me: So yeah, that was Julie and the Phantoms, how ya feeling? Bee: Great! This definitely won't change my brain chemistry forever

Next up, Descendants!

[weirdgirl92]

After much nostalgic binge watching, I’ve decided to do my own personal rankings of every classic Powerpuff Girls episode per season (because it sounded fun, and I was bored anyway).

Season 1:

Uh-Oh Dynamo

Mr. Mojo’s Rising

Tough Love

Telephonies

Mommy Fearest

Boogie Frights

The Rowdyruff Boys

Buttercrush

Mime For a Change

Bubblevicious

Just Another Manic Mojo

Cat Man Do

Ice Sore

Octi Evil

Monkey See, Doggy Do

The Bare Facts

Abracadaver

Insect Inside

Major Competition

Impeach Fuzz

Geshundfight

Paste Makes Waste

Fuzzy Logic

Powerpuff Bluff

Season 2:

Something’s a Ms.

The Powerpuff Girls’ Best Rainy Day Adventure Ever

Slumbering With the Enemy

Twisted Sister

Stuck Up, Up, and Away

Beat Your Greens

Speed Demon

Just Desserts

Birthday Bash

Supper Villain

Los Dos Mojos

Mo Job

Collect Her

Too Pooped to Puff

Dream Scheme

Daylight Savings

A Very Special Blossom

Slave the Day

Pet Feud

Imaginary Fiend

Mojo Jonesin’

You Snooze, You Lose

Schoolhouse Rocked

Cover Up

Down n’ Dirty

Cootie Gras

Season 3:

Child Fearing

Criss Cross Crisis

Power Prof.

Equal Fights

Meet the Beat Alls

Ploys R’ Us

Hot Air Buffoon

Three Girls and a Monster

Super Zeroes

Jewel of the Aisle

The Mane Event

Bought and Scold

The Headsucker’s Moxy

Helter Shelter

Power Lunch

Cop Out

Catastrophe

Candy is Dandy

Town and Out

Gettin’ Twiggy With It

Monkey See, Doggy Two

Fallen Arches

Moral Decay

Season 4:

Power-Noia

Knock It Off

Him Diddle Riddle

Not So Awesome Blossom

Forced Kin

Superfriends

Get Back Jojo

Stray Bullet

Members Only

Keen on Keane

Nano of the North

Film Flam

All Chalked Up

Season 5:

Substitute Creature

Silent Treatment

Monstra-City

Save Mojo

Twas the Fight Before Christmas

See Me, Feel Me, Gnomey

Documentary

Burglar Alarmed

Bang For Your Buck

Curses

Boy Toys

Girls Gone Mild

City of Clipsville

Lying Around the House

Bubble Boy

The Boys Are Back in Town

Seed No Evil

Divide and Conquer

Shut the Pup Up

Sweet ‘n’ Sour

Pee Pee Gs

Toast of the Town

Shotgun Wedding

Season 6:

Aspirations

Custody Battle

Makes Zen to Me

The Powerpuff Girls Rule!!!

Mizzen in Action

Oops, I Did It Again

Crazy Mixed Up Puffs

City of Nutsville

I See a Funny Cartoon in Your Future

Simian Says

Coupe D’etat

Mo’ Linguish

Neighbor Hood

Live and Let Dynamo

Roughing It Up

Prime Mates

Nuthin’ Special

Little Miss Interprets

What’s the Big Idea?

Octi-Gone

Night Mayor

A Made Up Story

West in Pieces

That’s Not My Baby

Reeking Havoc

Say Uncle

The City of Frownsville

Sun Scream

Top 10:

Power-Noia

Knock It Off

Uh Oh Dynamo

Something’s a Ms.

Best Rainy Day Adventure Ever

Mr. Mojo’s Rising

Tough Love

Telephonies

Child Fearing

Slumbering With the Enemy

Bottom 10:

Shotgun Wedding

Toast of the Town

Sun Scream

Pee Pee Gs

The City of Frownsville

Moral Decay

Say Uncle

Cootie Gras

Sweet ‘n’ Sour

Reeking Havoc

[unsleepingtales]

A lesson I have learned about myself in the past few months is no matter where in the world I am I will make time for fantasy high!

Greetings from Not Home, my sleep schedule is absolutely fucked. Without further ado let’s dive right into episode 18 (!!)

So. Picture the ocean.

Burth Bakarath <3

Yeah the fact that they’re allowed to hold the election off of school grounds is still wild to me

Oh my god MURPH came up with Gerard Neigh???? Love him so bad

Happy Birthday Me And Congratulations President Applebees

Ooh okay so they’re trying to get the nightmare king to fuck with the ship?

Sprak!

I love ship stats!!!!

As the birthday boy/most popular kid in school ☺️

The bad boys are steering the ship!!

I love the dynamic of the Most Powerful Girls In The World and The Coolest Guys

Hey guys be nicer to Jawbone please

K2 was such a gift to Ally

! My stepdad lives on a houseboat !

(Lou making panicked flailing sounds)

Emily. Fully making matcha.

I’m gonna do a full matcha ceremony!! It always makes the meth go down smooth!!!

What the fuck is happening guys. Am I out of it or is this just unhinged.

Classic back of house actions

I’m SO glad that Fight Me In The Sky is an enduring bit

ASO reference??

Take one and pass it on!

Oh my god look at the little party lights on the Hangman mini!! It’s so nice!!

There’s always time for a weird jawbone story!

Cmon mannnnn

We were all rooting for you!

Beautiful. Majestic. BAM.

Ooh what does Zac’s shirt say?? It’s blocked by the cloud. World Oyama something

I know it’s huge actually but the teeny tiny dragon mini is so cute

Yeahhh let’s keep it voting!

Murph’s hair looks very nice!

Zac’s shirt says World Oyama Karate!

What does knocked prone mean in this situation

Oooh Adaine had silvery barbs now!

Zac just Lives in crit city now

Gorgug Thistlespring the man you ARE…..

Keelhaul the fucking dragon hell yes

Thank fuck for uncanny dodge

Aaaaaaaa gorgug

And there’s the shot from the trailer!

We’re actually being attacked by dragons, we’re just making it fun!

I am trying to scroll tumblr as I watch the episode and I am fighting for my fucking LIFE to not get the Beardsley wild moment spoiled

Ayda!!!

‘Remember when we died?’ Oh you two are best friends who died together <3

Even the dragons look afraid

The nightmare king!!!!

Oh that hand is so coooool

Damage thresholds are so great

Oooooohoho Eugenia love you

Ain’t no party like a seacaster party cause a seacaster party blows up!!

I’m so glad that Riz likes his teacher now

I’ll be nearby! But I Have To Go

Steve Kornacki mention !

Have they guaranteed that everyone at the party is voting for Kristen? That’s just a given at this point?

I love the rain animation so much but it is kind of distracting unfortunately

Adaine Abernant PARTY WIZARD

Oh FUCK

God they keep saying Gerard and it keeps catching me off guard.

Solo Baxter? No Sandra Lynn?

“(mouth full of almonds) Oh my fucking god” cc writers ilyyyy

Zac was that to the tune of grandma got run over by a reindeer

They work together so well!!!!

I love Eugenia’s energy

I am gonna have it dissolve her. If it works.

She’s going to Hudol! She’s going steady with Perceval!

Literally 50/50 odds but we all know how this is gonna go

Zac fully dming this moment is beautiful

She might be pregnant??

You had your chance, and what you did was say blimey

She extrudes through time back to… England.

Heyyyy tornado!!!

Yeah how do you go back to plot after that

Oh fuck!

Oh god the editing for the sneak peek for next week was fantastic