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daylighteclipsed · 1 year ago

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@generatedreflection Hope you don’t mind if I respond to your tags this way, since my og post is already kind of long! So running on the assumption that KH is a video game, or at least fiction/a story, in-universe and the characters are waking up and changing when they’re not “supposed” to…

I guess it depends on when the initial divergence from fate/the narrative/the program happened and how much it affected. Was Riku supposed to be our player character? If so, did Sora and Riku only swap physical places/external roles, or did their writing or programming adjust their personalities to fit their new places in the story/game so as to keep the narrative from diverging too much? Is this the first run through the story, or have there been multiple past loops we’re not privy to and that the characters don’t consciously remember but which still affect their hearts?

I’m thinking of ReCoded specifically, when Data Sora and Data Riku go on this whole adventure that’s similar to KH1 but different enough to shape them into their own people. Even after they’re reset to follow what’s written in the Journal, we know those memories remain in their hearts and in the hearts of their newfound Disney friends from the ‘real’ world, Mickey, Donald, and Goofy. So data KH1 will never truly reflect KH1 as we know it.

If ReCoded is spelling the big picture out for us, do Sora and Riku only start awakening during the one run of KH1 that we play… or have they been waking up because of one or more resets before that we haven’t seen? Is fate, destiny, the narrative, the program trying really hard to make this story play out the way it’s “supposed” to, but the boys keep swerving, developing more awareness and free will with every reset? Or is this the first run where things are different because of something the Master of Masters most likely set in motion? Or maybe what he set in motion has taken all these resets to come to fruition?

It’s a lot to think about. And I don’t have any answers. Certainly it’s interesting to consider all the different ways the story could go/is maybe “supposed” to go… If Sora and Riku’s roles are supposed to be flipped, with Riku as the champion of light and Sora as the one who falls to darkness… then it’s kind of ironic that they seem to be circling back to that now. Like rather than completely changing or swapping destinies, they just took a detour. They took the long way around, but the road still leads to the same place. Fate is fighting to correct course.

But I also think, you know, Sora could’ve always been meant to be the Hero and embody that archetype even if the Keyblade was not “supposed” to be his. I don’t think the one who wields Kingdom Key Light is synonymous necessarily with the Hero of the story or even the main protagonist. It’s also possible for Riku to pass on the Keyblade to Sora without falling to darkness.

Either way, the idea of Riku giving his crown/destiny to Sora, rewriting the story and essentially acting as the narrative for Sora in this sense, usurping fate, is interesting. Especially when you compare this to Data Riku’s role in ReCoded. He’s the vessel for the Journals, for the entire digital universe they create, and he protects it. He protects Sora’s story, the one we see in the games, which plays out how it does because Riku gives Sora the Keyblade.

The one thing I feel for sure — a lot of this, the story changing and characters waking up/coming alive, comes back to Riku. From what we see of him as a little kid, Riku’s always been more “awake,” it seems, than his peers. Always questioning things and possessing a wisdom beyond his years. It’s like he almost knows (or remembers) things he shouldn’t. As Sora puts it, Riku says “some weird stuff sometimes.” And I think Riku is the one who starts waking Sora up. He encourages Sora to think about things that it doesn’t seem Sora would think about on his own. To ask questions. To see their world differently. And to consider worlds beyond their own.

I think he’s why Sora’s first line in the series is about awakening. “I’ve been having these weird thoughts lately. Like — Is any of this for real or not?” And I think Riku’s why Sora’s able to connect with and awaken/bring to life so many characters in the story. That might even be canon, actually, if Riku encouraging Sora to open his heart to Ventus when they’re little kids is what teaches Sora how to... By empowering Sora, Riku is the catalyst for a ripple effect of change that defies destiny and universal law. And it culminates in his KH3 sacrifice which allows Sora to rewrite how the Book of Prophecies ends.

I think that’s what Riku has always represented: Awakening. Truth. The outside world — whether that means adulthood, reality, new perspectives, or lands yet untraveled. He makes the darkness conscious by bringing it to light. Especially for Sora. Riku quite literally wakes Sora up after CoM and in DDD, and his light pulls forgotten/repressed memories up from the depths. Riku’s often associated with the sun — the kind of bright, harsh light that hurts to look at. That makes it hard, if not impossible, to fall back asleep.

Riku’s the sudden light in your eyes that has you groaning and rolling away when someone has to get you out of bed in the morning lol He’s the rude awakening. The truth is often not pleasant or easy. It often hurts. But inevitably, it becomes known. Inevitably, the sun rises and illuminates the dark. Dawn breaks, and the day and all its challenges must be faced. No slacking off. Chop, chop. It’s time to wake up, Sora. Destati!

Even Data Riku in ReCoded is the one who lifts the curtain for Data Sora and ‘reveals the matrix’ so to speak. “It’s time for you to learn the truth.” Riku offers the truth, perhaps quite literally sometimes if that’s what his iconic outstretched hand gesture represents — and it definitely seems to given how KH3’s tutorial/awakening parallels Sora’s dream in the KH1 opening. But it’s up to Sora to accept the truth. To face it. To take Riku’s hand and awaken. It’s Sora’s choice.

Anyway. Whether Riku is “supposed” to be the Hero or was always meant to be the Rival, he’s not supposed to love Sora as much as he does, and certainly not in the romantic way the games suggest he does… I understand your hesitation about gay intent in KH… But it really feels like the “missing”/unspoken piece here that makes so many people scratch their heads over Riku’s character arc. For Sora, it’s less clear (especially in English), but I do think Riku is in love with him. And I truly believe so much of “destiny” changing and characters awakening, Sora awakening, comes back to that.

Destiny in this case would be the typical formula of Disney fairy tales and the expectations of our heteronormative society. And awakening would be developing awareness of these limitations and smashing them… Perhaps reflected through Riku and Sora exposing the flaws in the Light and Dark binary that’s dictated Keyblade society and caused many of the problems their generation has to contend with.

Perhaps the door to the light, to truth, to awakening IS the closet door, then (insert joke here about Riku literally being the gay awakening)… But it’s a lot of other things as well. Awakening is discovering any truth. Every truth. It’s knowledge of the systems that limit and control you, of any unseen force that holds you back. It’s power to see through illusions and lies, distortions and distractions. It’s free will and independent thought. It’s self-actualization and true freedom. After all, you cannot break free of chains you don’t know are there.

That certainly makes the Master of Masters an interesting fellow… It seems like he wants change. He wants the characters to deviate from the script, to awaken, to develop free will… But at the same time, he’s pulling all the strings. He’s the eye always watching them... Does he truly want freedom, or does he want to be the one who decides what freedom looks like?

#I’m just goin all in now. let’s get crazy.#kingdom hearts #soriku #i think kh is the kind of series that demands you be open minded to understand it #if you’re not willing to get deep or crazy or have your perception challenged #you’re gonna be really confused and frustrated lol #i mean there are still things i can’t wrap my head around #but i mostly understand it. recoded is when everything started making sense for me #it was my ‘aha!’ moment

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mask131 · 5 months ago

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If Middle-earth is Earth in the past, is there any possibility for the magic to return? The magical creatures are probably all dead, but I assume the more spiritual beings like the Maiar and the Valar should still be around, right?

Asked this to a couple of friends that are Tolkien fans and they couldn't answer me.

Now I am NOT at all a Tolkien expert. I will try my best to answer you but I can't recommend you enough to go check actual lore-wise people for Tolkien... I know there are a handful of Youtube channels dedicated to explaining little tidbits of lore and answering specific questions about Tolkien's works. "In Deep Geek" or "Nerd of the Rings" are good starting places for casual Youtube videos about Tolkien lore, to listen in some spare time or just as background.

Now it depends what you mean by "magic" but, taking into account the whole "Middle-Earth is just prehistoric Earth/England's mythology" angle, in this sense, yes you are right about the point.

Most of the fabulous and fantastical creatures of legends and myth are dead or gone, and it is the whole point of Tolkien's work. The Lord of the Ring is literaly the tale of how an entire Age ended. It is something that begins quite early in The Hobbit, with the death of what was the last great dragon, but one doesn't get the full scope until we reach The Lord of the Rings, and by the end of it we are hit with everything. The Elves are fading away, the Wizards have all broken off in various ways, Sauron and his underlings are no more, the rings of power have no power anymore, the Ents are doomed to extinction, even some of the last descendants of the eldritch horrors like the Balrog or Shelob are dead. The great wonders of Middle-Earth are gone, beautiful or horrible, and it is sad and an end - but also a new beginning for a new age. And in this sense, yes, magic is technically gone or going away by the end of the Lord of the Rings.

But, as you pointed out, it doesn't mean "magic" is still disappeared forever, because in the Tolkien universe, magic IS the world. As you said, indeed, the Valar/Maiar are still around, and will always be there until the end of time. They are just out of reach and out of sight: this is one of the big themes of the Silmarillion, since it is the book where we go from "The gods walk the same earth we walk today" to "The gods are nowhere to be seen and work in mysterious ways". The whole point is that the Valar slowly retracted themselves from the universe, isolating themselves in the West, acting less and less in mortals affairs, imposing indirect means of interacting with fate and events rather than direct action... And it is part of the entire aesthetic of Tolkien's Legendarium: the regression of magic is constant, and while the world described in The Lord of the Rings seems like the "magical world" we today lost, when one reads the Silmarillion you realize LotR's Middle-Earth was actually a pretty drab and mundane world compared to the earlier Ages of the World. It is just that the very passing of Ages means that less and less magic and wonders happen - it is the Tolkien's way.

But they are not gone. There is still of this "magic" left around, it is just out of reach, hard to spot, not usually seen - and you have to know what you are looking for. Just like the Valar, who will always be there, but mortals cannot reach them, nobody remembers them, and they don't interact with us anymore. I think it was in The Hobbit that Tolkien literaly began by saying that some Hobbits still lived around England, though they hide away from humans and thus one would need tough chance to ever find them. It was just a "child's story" narrative device, but it still set the tone for the idea that there are remnants of LotR's Middle-Earth in our day and age (well more like in the 19th/early 20th century England), the same way Middle-Earth had by the time of LotR remnants of the first ages of the world (Shelob reminding of the distant threat of Ungoliant, or Galadriel's vial containing a last piece of primordial light).

Plus, you have to remember Tom Bombadil. The guy is definitively still around. And that's his role. When did he get there, we will never know, because he was never born - but he was there at some point, and he was there long before everybody else, and he will be there long after everybody else, and he'll still be around probably until the end of the world. As I said in my previous post, many people dismiss Tom Bombadil in LotR because yes, he provides nothing to the plot - but they miss his importance, that he is here as a symbolic and almost metaphysical character, as a tool not just to worldbuild but also to show the whole idea of this world. Yes the elves and dwarves and orcs are gone, and there are no more great wizards or terrible dark lords... but there will always be somewhere this weird singing guy who is definitively not human and nobody knows where he comes from, with his nature-spirit of a wife, and his grumpy murderous neighbor Old Willow. And I think it is quite important to understand Tolkien's whole approach to the "fading of magic". Tolkien's world is one of constant "degradation" (to the point he even stopped writing his story about a Fourth Age because he realized it would be much too bleak and dark even for him), but it is also one that is tied to his production for children and an interest in fairytale and children stories, and as such it also teaches to go search the real magic today not in immense dragons, or powerful elf-queens, or cursed antique jewels, but rather in a few Hobbits living their life hidden in some shire, or in an excentric Tom Bombadil deep within beautiful old woods.

#ask #lord of the rings #tolkien #middle-earth #but remember i am not an expert and this is just the opinion of a casual enjoyer/kind of fan but still not an expert

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nientedenada · 1 year ago

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Mages Guild Morass: A Mix-Up over Vanus Galerion's Final Fate

Also posted on r/teslore. A couple months ago, my friend @akaviri-dovah asked a question about Vanus Galerion's timeline.

Ok so I’m reading up on Vanus uesp page again and apparently there was a point wherein he abandoned his guild and left Tamriel?? […] "Over time, Galerion grew bitterly disillusioned with the contrived hierarchies and sinister political environment that the Mages Guild had become. He grew regretful for establishing the guild in the first place, as it had become monster of its own, and was too late for him to fix. After denouncing the guild, Galerion elected to leave Tamriel entirely to travel to other lands. For many years Galerion wandered around Nirn. Eventually, after long his abandonment of the Mages Guild, Galerion claimed that he had found the virtue of magic in his solitary travels." [This description] probably wouldn’t line up with how he still managed to gather so many mages and Lamp Knights (guild specific) in his battle against Manni right?

This question completely confuddled me at first, because it turned out I didn't know my Vanus Galerion lore very well at all. But now I know a lot more and I am here to share a very niche lore puzzle with you all.

I think we're all aware that when the devs imported lore books into ESO, they didn't always make certain the books' contents fit into the previously established timeline. Sometimes that can be explained by Hermaeus Mora moving books about through time, but often books are edited for ESO but some detail is overlooked. This is what appears to have happened with Vanus Galerion.

Origin of the Mages Guild, written by Ted Peterson, has been in every big TES game since Daggerfall except Skyrim. It’s been edited for different games, but the last paragraph is the same in all versions.

One need not be a member of the Mages Guild to know that this carefully contrived hierarchy is often nothing more than a chimera. As Vanus Galerion himself said bitterly, leaving Tamriel to travel to other lands, "The Guild has become nothing more than an intricate morass of political infighting."

In Daggerfall and Morrowind, that is the last heard of Vanus Galerion. This version is backed up by a role-playing thread from 2001 in which Ted Peterson, posting as Tedders, has an exchange with Vanus Galerion (also played by himself)

Tedders: Thank Mara for Vanus Galerion for freeing the Old Ways and founding the Mages Guild. Vanus Galerion: For many long years I did regret that very deed, as it seems I created just another monster of sinister politics. The virtue of magic I found in my solitary travels, many years after I abandoned the Mages Guild and ventured on my own. Tedders: Poor Trechtus. It's too late now.

Oblivion, though, adds a new version of Vanus Galerion’s fate. In Mannimarco, King of Worms, it’s explained that Vanus never did peace out on the Mages Guild. He actually died leading Mages Guild Lamp Knights against Mannimarco.

They say Galerion left the Guild, calling it 'a morass,' But untruth is a powerful stream, polluting the river of time. Galerion beheld Mannimarco's rise through powers sublime, To his mages and Lamp Knights, 'Before my last breath, Face I must the tyranny of worms, and kill at last, undeath.' He led them north to cursed lands, to a mountain pass.

(Short interlude: this is not quite as bad as Mannimarco's own poetry, but it ain't good)

In this text, Vanus Galerion is killed in the fight against Mannimarco

A thousand good and evil perished then, history confirms. Among, alas, Vanus Galerion, he who showed the way,

This version is supported by Mannimarco’s claim in Oblivion that he had Galerion’s corpse in his possession.

I must say, I expected Arch-Mage Traven, rather than his star pupil. I am disappointed to see that he could not face me himself. I have met so many of his predecessors over the years. I developed a particular fondness for Galerion, ill-preserved though he may be.

So, depending on whose version you believe, Vanus either left the guild calling it a morass or led the guild in a final battle against Mannimarco.

In comes ESO to complicate matters.

The ESO Devs did not include Mannimarco, King of Worms in the game, since Vanus Galerion is still alive in ESO. But they didn’t ignore the text. A lot of the details of Vanus and Mannimarco’s early life from Mannimarco King of Worms are fleshed out in the Summerset expansion via. Vanus’ ESO autobiography: Artaeum Lost, as well as in ESO flashbacks to their time with the Psijics.

However, base game ESO stumbled with their version of Origin of the Mages Guild, which still ends

When you bring this book into ESO, you get the implication that Vanus got into a snit at the Mages Guild, left Tamriel to travel other lands, AND THEN came back from abroad for the events of ESO where he’s very involved in Mages Guild business again.

So to sum it up

Version 1: Daggerfall to Morrowind: Vanus is said to have called the guild a morass and left Tamriel at some unspecified date. That is the last mention of him.

Version 2: Oblivion to Skyrim: It's suggested that story is untrue and he actually died leading the Mages guild in a fight against Mannimarco but many believe he instead left Tamriel after calling the Guild a morass.

Version 3: ESO: Doesn't go into Vanus' death because it's not happened yet but keeps details from that Oblivion/Skyrim Version about his earlier life with Mannimarco. ESO devs miss the detail of the morass line referring to Vanus Galerion's permanent disappearance in both Versions 1 and 2.

I think if we go with Version 3, which is the most up-to-date, we would conclude that he did get into an earlier snit with his subordinates, went globetrotting, and then came back to guide the Mages Guild. Centuries later, someone misattributed the morass remark from the earlier situation to the latter disappearance.

Or you could go with time-travelling books.

Or you could just shrug your shoulders and ignore the obvious developer error and continue with the timeline established by the previous games.

UESP has cobbled all these sources into one timeline: ESO Events -> Morass Remark and Exit from Mages Guild -> Leading the Mages Guild against Mannimarco/ Death. But unless we go with the time-travelling books theory, this doesn’t seem possible.

End of Morass Gate.

#Vanus Galerion #tesblr #tes lore #niente lore #elder scrolls online #Mannimarco

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maruiin · 1 year ago

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Part 1

Part 2

The air was frosty, puffs of steam escaping from our mouths with each deep exhale. I walked behind Jesper, Kaz, and Inej, looking around cautiously. Until we got away from here, we needed to be very careful. Ahead, as agreed, there was a carriage with horses harnessed. Jesper did an excellent job, unlike the rest of us.

The Sun Summoner slipped from our grasp; we didn't even spend a minute near her. Now, I was sure that none of us had a further plan. Right now, I think we'll head to the city and decide our next move there. Perhaps we'll still have a chance to catch the Summoner, get a million kruge, return to Ketterdam, and continue living a normal life.

Up ahead, the guys are arguing about something, mostly Kaz and Jesper. As we approach the carriage, I look around once again. While Jesper, followed by Inej and Kaz, climb onto the driver's seat, I peer into the darkness, checking if anyone is following us. Getting caught now, when we're almost free from the guards, would be foolish.

"Grace, come on, take a seat," Jesper teases, saying those words with a playful tone because he finds something amusing. I turn my head towards them, inspecting the horses, the carriage, and my friends who have already settled in and are waiting for me.

Yes, I've become quite suspicious. Just ten minutes ago, I killed a person, and even the fact that I saved Inej from her personal sin and Kaz from death doesn't calm me down in the slightest. Now, I sense treachery everywhere, as if there's a threat behind every corner, a Grisha or a soldier. I place my right foot on the step, balance my left foot on the edge near Kaz, and pull myself up using my arms on the roof. I sit next to Inej, tucking my left leg under me and letting my right leg hang down from my side.

Throughout all this, I avoid looking at anyone, keeping my gaze down. I feel Inej glancing at me anxiously, torn between the impulse to take my hand, which I'm currently gripping the edge of the carriage roof between Jesper and Kaz, or to leave things as they are and maybe talk about it later in private. She knows I won't pour my heart out in front of the guys, especially not in front of Brekker. Not my style.

Still, she chooses the second option, leaving me with a genuinely encouraging smile when I look at her. Yes, Inej, you're one of the few who understands me. Jesper is still chatting away to Kaz, until Kaz asks him about the whereabouts of the Sun Summoner. Jesper smiles, as if the fate of the entire world depends on him right now, and releases the horses. The carriage jolts, so I grip the edge of the roof tighter.

Dawn was approaching. Maybe another half hour or so, and the sun would start rising above the horizon, painting the sky in shades of pink, filling the darkness of the night with light. We continue to roll through the streets of Os Alta, checking for any pursuit. Tails are unnecessary now, and changing clothes would be a good idea; dressed as guards, we might raise too many questions.

"Jesper, turn down a less crowded street, we need to change clothes before sunrise attracts attention."

Jesper nods and turns onto another, less bustling street. We tried to head to the outskirts of the city, again, not to raise suspicions from the residents or the guards, since some of them have seen us. We pull under a bridge, and Jesper stops the horses.

"Alright, you guys go first," Inej says, "stuff inside." She pats the roof of the dark carriage. Kaz and Jesper jump down first, getting inside the carriage. Inej and I slowly descend from the roof, stretching our limbs.

I wrap myself in the coat that was part of the guard uniform and exhale with relief. We escaped. Inej approaches me slowly, touching my shoulder. It happens so unexpectedly that I flinch.

"Don't you want to talk about it?" Inej never insisted, not even now, but there was an underlying plea in her voice, like saying, "It'll be easier if you tell." I sigh deeply a few times, swallowing the lump in my throat, and rub my fingertips together. I've always done this when nervous.

- "And what do you want to hear?" I ask quietly because I don't want anyone to hear me at all. After all, I know that Kaz is listening in on us. Inej presses her plump lips together, rubbing my shoulder in support. - "I killed a person, Inej... I never imagined anything like this, never played out in my head how something like this could happen."

Inej listens, nodding humbly at certain moments, and I continue speaking just as softly, not breaking the tone.

- "And I absolutely can't understand myself. At times, I tremble as if with a fever. I remember his body, that dagger sticking out of his head, and a wave of panic engulfs me. But there comes a moment when I don't... I can't..." I pause, interrupting my rapid mumbling, something resembling a confession, and I raise my eyes to Inej. - "I can't imagine what it would be like if you did it... I can't imagine if Grisha had reached Kaz and killed him. And in those moments, I realize that I did everything right, that I wouldn't have done it differently, it wouldn't have worked out differently. And it becomes even scarier from that..."

Tears well up in strong and brave Inej's eyes, I see how much it hurts her to listen to this, but she swallows the lump of tears and says:

- "Why didn't you let me do it?"

- "You yourself said it was a sin..." I smile at the corner of my lips and watch as Suli's face relaxes. - "And I couldn't let you do it."

She smiles, a small tear running down her cheek, which Gafa couldn't hold back. Without thinking about anything or anyone, she turns me completely toward her and hugs me, holding me tightly against her body.

How weak I feel. I'm sure Inej would have held herself together, not showing her emotions, not showing how much she's suffering from what she's done. She would have swallowed it and perhaps forgotten over time, continuing to live on and instilling her faith in everyone. Unfortunately, I'm not Inej...

- "You know what your problem is, Grace?" Inej asks, pulling away from me but not letting go of my shoulders. Our height difference is noticeable now. Not much, but I'm about five centimeters taller than Inej. - "You're afraid that we'll look at you differently. You're afraid that I or Jesper or Kaz will look at you as a killer, accuse you of it. Deep down, you think that our attitude toward you will change, but it won't. It will never be like that."

Inej speaks in a full voice, not afraid to be heard, but apparently, that's so I'll literally ingrain her words into my head.

- "Thank you, Inej..." I whisper words of gratitude to the Suli who looks at my eyes, now full of tears, with a smile. Our brave Suli certainly knows how to move me.

Jesper jumps out of the carriage first, and then Kaz follows, seemingly limping even more on his right leg. I wipe away the tears so the guys won't see. Otherwise, I'd endure a month of Jesper's jokes about women's tears. But even for that, I adore him.

- "Your turn," the sharpshooter rushes to inform us. All this time, he kept looking back, staring at the large chest for belongings attached to the back of the carriage. But I decide not to ask him about it. Who knows, maybe he just imagined it, so I jump ahead of Inej into the carriage, closing the door.

For a few minutes, we don't get out of the carriage, adjusting our clothes and rearranging our weapons. Inej mostly has knives, both long and short, for close and ranged combat, each with its name. I, on the other hand, stick with the usual: a pistol, bullets, and two daggers. One was given to Inej, the other gifted by Kaz.

The spot where Brekker's gift used to rest was now empty.

We jump out of the carriage and approach the guys who are discussing something.

- "We need to find some tavern, stay there for a while, and come up with a plan for our next actions," Kaz says, inspecting Inej and me for readiness, pausing his gaze on my hand that now rests on my thigh with an empty sheath for the dagger. Kaz doesn't reveal anything; he doesn't even frown. He just raises his eyes to me, and we exchange glances.

- "We passed a tavern not far from here; I think we could stop there," Jesper suggested. In the meantime, I shift my gaze from Kaz to Wylan, as I can't withstand the intensity of his penetrating eyes. At another time, sure, we might have even competed in staring contests, but right now, I'm just a couple of steps away from remembering my recent conversation with Inej and bursting into tears again.

- "I think that's a good idea," Inej agrees, already turning towards the carriage.

- "Agreed," I nod approvingly because I don't see any other options. We all head towards the carriage, and then I notice once again how Jesper keeps looking in the direction of the chest. - "Jesper, what are you peering at over there?" He only grins slyly, looking first at me, then at Kaz and Inej, and then shifting his gaze back to the chest.

- "Oh, just making sure we don't lose anyone else's belongings along the way," we all look at him in surprise, I even raise an eyebrow in confusion, - "you never know, maybe the cargo is too valuable."

- "You can check it yourself later." Kaz scowls, responding to Jesper's words with a grim expression.

- "Of course, we will make sure to check..."

I can only smile, shaking my head from side to side. It's always fun with Jesper around; if it weren't for him, I can't imagine how our heists would go without his presence and his sense of fun for everyone.

And above the rooftops, the sun of a new day was already shining brightly.

#kaz brekker #kaz brekker x reader #freddy carter smut #six of crows #kazzle dazzle #kiss

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getvalentined · 10 months ago

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Has anyone asked about Seem for the character ask game?

HIGH PRIEST SEEM OF THE GOLDEN ORDER

🎟️ SEXUALITY HEADCANON: Seem is completely and totally pansexual. Sex and gender don't matter to her at all.

⚧️ GENDER HEADCANON: This depends on which version of her I'm working with, but generally I read Seem as some flavor of nonbinary. The devs refer to her with she/her pronouns, while the only pronoun ever used for her in-game is they, which is pretty distinct—particularly for a game that came out in 2004.

💕 A SHIP: Jak/Seem is my #1 top favorite pairing in the entire series. The progression of their canonical relationship is one of my favorite things, because it takes the entire game to get to the point where they admit any kind of reliance on one another, and at that point they're so comfortable with each other that neither of them question the other—I don't think it's much of a jump to assume that could develop into something other than a platonic relationship with more time.

🖇️ A BROTP: In canon, Seem+Daxter for sure. The idea of the two of them taking turns dragging Jak away from his more self-destructive behaviors, conspiring with each other to make sure he eats and sleeps and slows down is one of my favorite things. In a different world, I love love love the idea of Seem and Gol Acheron getting to know each other. I've RP'd and plotted out multiple AUs with this concept, generally resulting in Gol referring to Seem as "the little Light Sage." She's studied his research for her entire life, so she has a healthy dose of respect for him, megalomania notwithstanding.

🚫 A NOTP: Would you believe people used to ship Seem with Veger? Not like...a lot. But it happened. That one gets a yikes from me.

💭 A RANDOM HEADCANON: Seem is Onin's granddaughter; Onin was the leader of the Order when Praxis had the Precursor monks banished from Haven following the fall of the holy district, but she apostatized in order to be allowed to stay and continue to provide guidance to city leadership—because that's what she was supposed to do, Onin is omnipresent in time due to overexposure to light eco in early adulthood, so this wasn't an act of selfishness but an acceptance of fate. (Y'know Everything Everywhere All At Once? Onin is kinda like that, but it's less of a constant jumble.) Seem was obviously very young at the time, but given that her mother died in the aforementioned destruction of the Sacred Site, that made her the next in line to become High Priest; regardless of her age and inexperience, not to mention the fresh trauma of her mother's death, Onin allowed Seem to be thrown into the wasteland to die along with everyone else. The fact that she not only survived but thrived, reuniting with Damas and reclaiming the Order's oldest temple, is irrelevant to Seem with regard to her feelings on the situation. She's never forgiven Onin for this, and she never will.

🗣️GENERAL OPINION: Favorite character in the whole series. I named a cat after her. I love her more than I can express.

#ask game #headcanon warning #seem #seem jnd #jak and daxter #jnd

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matan4il · 1 year ago

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Good morning, sweet Alice. I want to write and comment every day! But my mood fluctuates from anger, sadness, rage, and disappointment that sometimes it's hard to find the right words or tones. Especially because it can feel petty in regards to what you are actually living through.

So I thought you know what I couldn't share anything new with you. Why don't I tell you a story back??

This has been an interesting few weeks in my corner of CA for how many people are actually paying attention now. I don't think Iran expected Hamas to succeed this far and now........ it's fucking out there. In ways that show their evil to normies that can't be ignored. In reference, especially about the baby in the over.

I had one friend call me to ask, what exactly is Hamas and for once listen to me about the answer.

I had a younger family member remove their palestine river to the sea post from a year ago and actually call me. To ask questions.

On a sad note, I have one friend whose little sister is leaving her college and coming home at the end of the semester. We can't be there to help her, but we have been door dashing and locals checking in on her. She's terrified to leave her dorm. With that, though, it's actually opening people's eyes to the leftist extremist on college campuses. At least she can come home and be safe with friends and family. She's not the only one!!

People are finally asking questions and paying attention. I think it will get uglier before it's better. But it's a loud disingenuous loud. There is push back finally. People can not comprehend the evil acts that Hamas executed. And they won't be shamed into moral equivalency it.

I hope you're all staying safe!!! Thank you for always updating us!!!

My darling friend! *hugs*

Thank you so much for this. For all of it. Your words are always kind and meaningful, and simply knowing that you wanna write daily is so beautiful, I feel blessed that you found my blog, and I got to meet you! I felt that way even before this massacre, and I feel that even more since... <333

IDK what Hamas and Iran expected. The amount of ammunition and weapons that Hamas brought with them was meant to allow them to hold entire town hostage for way longer than the 24-36 or so hours that they did (depending on which town we're talking about). I heard estimates ranging from several days to a month. Either way, they came prepared for longer than they lasted. So, did they manage more than they expected, 'coz at first they did get to kill so many defenseless civilians with no interference, as they managed to neutralize the security forces? Or did they succeed less than expected, since they lost control of Israeli towns faster than they intended? I don't know.

I do believe that Hamas (and maybe Iran as well) expected Israel to strike back, but without taking down Hamas, which is what happened in previous cases. In 2014, they kidnapped and murdered three Jewish teenagers. But for a while, the fate of those boys was unknown. The Hamas launched rockets at Israel for arresting their terrorists as Israeli security forces tried to find out what happened to the kidnapped boys. Then, by the time the bodies were recovered, dumped in a field, Hamas used the terror tunnels that they secretly built into Israeli territory in order to kidnap and kill Israelis. I'll never forget the tunnel they dug into a kindergarten. They only managed to kidnap the bodies of two Israeli soldiers. No living hostages. Maybe they thought that if they got away with that whole sequence of events, they'd get away with this, too. Maybe they really believed Israel didn't take down Hamas back then because we're cowards, not because of the cost in human life to both sides.

But as for the west's reaction, I find it incredibly reassuring to hear from you that some people have not become SO radicalized, that the massacre of Israelis is something they can justify, ignore or deny. That's comforting, but IDK how representative it is. Because I don't remember people being this bold in their antisemitism in the past, either. I don't remember that people just flat out said that Jews deserve to die for something we are not. I do not remember Jewish students being this scared on college campuses or in their own homes before this false narrative that casts Jews as colonizers of their own native land. And while I'm glad that there are people waking up, I think others are sinking even deeper into the pool of Kool Aid. I've seen people who I hadn't seen posting against Israel before doing just that, and I have seen people shamelessly denying the atrocities of the massacre... And I have no way of knowing what's happening more, people being shaken out of their apathy to the well being of Israeli Jews, or people even further de-humanizing us.

I'm so grateful for your dose of optimism! I am very much embracing it to my heart, and keeping it close to me, and I will pray with all my might that at the end of the day, people are kind, and they do recognize the reality of the threat that Israel is facing. I'm even more grateful to you for speaking up, and educating others, making sure to pass on our voices to those we can't reach. What you're doing is truly essential, and I wish I had a way to show you just how thankful I am.

Sending you all my endless love, always! xoxox

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

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the-bloody-sadist · 1 year ago

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Hi! It's been a while and I realized I didn't follow you on my other account. I hope you've been well. I have some questions relating to my writing project that I want your insight on.

Do you think a character that is human experimented on could have their curiosity sparked by the experiments and pursue knowledge in that area? I don't want it to just look like "the torture was good actually".

How would you go about adding stakes in a story where the main characters are basically immortal?

Is it possible to instill negative traits into a story in a way that still feels intentional? For example, looping to my second question, I want to have the feeling of "these monster attacks and exploding orphanages are getting boring and it's boring because the villains wont die", but without outright chasing the reader away.

Thank you for your time and I hope you have a good day! 🐋

Hi Lil Whale!!! Good to see you again!! Here's some answers for your questions:

Absolutely. If you think about it in terms of trauma, a good deal of trauma survivors will repeat certain behaviors of the trauma they suffered, as a means of controlling the circumstances around what happened to them. This is a coping method as well as a possible self-destructive behavior, depending on how it's used, so going into the experiments after surviving being experimented on could offer the victim a chance to process what happened, nail down the details of what was done to them so they can have closure, and continue in the field as someone who experiments instead of getting experimented on. Or, perhaps, they're also getting experimented on, or experimenting on theirselves, which is just another way to put themselves in control of the abuse they didn't have control over in the past. If they define how much is enough, what they'll do to themselves, and so on, it can lend a feeling of overcoming that past abuse. Now they're in charge, and now the person in their past cannot hurt them.

This is not as tough a concept as it might initially seem! When stakes are not based on life or death, there are plenty of other (and imo infinitely better) stakes you can raise. First off, though, you can always create a method in which immortals CAN be killed, still. Lots of good stories about immortal characters do this! Take Heaven Official's Blessing, for example - all of the characters are either gods or ghosts, but there are still methods to disperse their remaining souls. For instance, the ashes that remain of a ghost's dead body are forged into items that the ghosts hide. If these ashes are found and destroyed, that destroys the ghost for good. For the gods, who are humans that have ascended into immortal beings, their bodies are technically still alive, they just regenerate. Because of this, the main character suffered a worse fate more than once because he CAN'T die, which I believe is far more powerful than death stakes. Because he couldn't die, a mob stabbed him with swords over and over. Because he couldn't die, he tried to commit suicide and could not after his parents' deaths. Because he couldn't die, he was locked up in a coffin where he survived for ages. This is infinitely more terrifying in my opinion than simply dying. Other than this, you can also give the characters strong emotional stakes. Friends, someone they love, etc., and losing these friends by betrayal or other circumstances out of their control. I'm not sure how much help you would need on that subject though, so I'm assuming you were going for my first answer on the immortality stakes!

I'm not entirely sure if I have the right idea on what you're asking on this one, but I THINK I do, so I'll try!! If you mean that you want the readers to know you ALSO think it's boring to have the villains not die and keep returning to bomb orphanages, you must mean that you'd be doing that to build up to a better thing that's not boring. That's absolutely doable, and it won't scare the reader away as long as you hint at that growing thing, not spend TOO much time on the boring things, and make it clear through your writing voice that you're fed up with the villains not dying, too. I hope that makes sense. It's a bit of a nuanced thing and easier done than said for me, but as long as you have the subtle promise of something on the horizon creating tension in the readers, you'll be able to keep them. That's literally ALL it takes, if your writing is good enough!

Thank you for the ask, and I hope you have a great day too! <3

#sadist’s answered asks #Lil Whale Anon 🐳#writing advice #writing help

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kudzucataclysm · 2 years ago

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owowowo got tagged in a Writer Tag game thing by @vacantgodling :D i tag whoever sees this or whoever wants to do it :D

it'll all be under the cut huehue

Do you write in order?

FUCK NO LOL. i just jot down the most important scenes first, or at least the scenes in my mind that stand out the most. Then i just…tend to fill in the blanks…but sometimes i try to work backwards! Like figuring out the ending first sometimes helps me in terms of structure and pacing

Do you start with something in particular?

HRRRRM well, it depends on the story i suppose…i usually like to start with either the inciting incident or like…not a prologue exactly but a bit where the story is set up asking a QUESTION narratively so to speak. the 2nd one tends to be hard for me to do cuz i have to make it interesting enough to keep people reading…

in the case of SE, the inciting incident happened decades beforehand, and the story itself is like…the consequences manifesting!! after being held off for so long if that makes sense

How fully formed does your writing come out first try?

usually 40% of the time. i write down what happens beat for beat then i usually have to hit my head against the wall to come up with cohesive sentences and prose…which doesnt work anymore now vv’ i have to get back into reading books tbh

How many drafts do you go through?

ive never had a fully formed draft in my life so i wouldnt know

Tell me about your process

the characters tend to come first. they just kinda show up expecting to be put somewhere, but first i just kinda let them run around a bit on their own. i let them develop a base personality, then introduce more characters to flesh them out.

the world comes into existence at roughly the same time as the characters do- not fully fleshed out, it DOES in fact, start out as a vibe. bits and pieces abt what it looks like, which leads to ‘WHY does it look like that? what happened?’ which leads into more questions obviously, but the nitty gritty details of the setting dont really come into fruition until i get the inklings of a plot

the plot, while secondary, is actually very important to me. i truly hate the “no plot just vibes” aspect of a lot of writing communities these days for some reason (not being mean just. i dont like it…) so i usually have a plot surrounding the characters in some way- there isnt “OOOH the fate of the wooorld!!” sort of thing. the plot doesnt come first to me, but that doesnt mean that its not equally as important. ‘The Thing’ is happening and what the characters want, and how they react to Thing is usually how i let the plot drive itself. which can obviously be chaotic…and thats why the last year or so of me working on SE has been equally as chaotic, but its been simmering down recently to the point where i really SHOULD be starting to script things…. if that makes sense at all

throughout the entire process theres usually a ton of research into a shitload of different topics. what-ifs and what not- “oh what if THIS thing happened? what if this historic event went differently? what if robots were meat? what if the earth got cracked open? everything is ‘WHAT IF’ or ‘HOW WOULD’, and then the story is just me exploring the answers to those questions :D

the steps arent usually in any particular order and i tend to bounce around a lot, but to sum it all up i develop stories by consistently going 'this would be sick as shit if [x] was a thing/happened'

#talking and blathering #i also do this by not writing anything down :D'#im not ok :DD

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space-blue · 1 year ago

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and just to clarify my position... Sabine using emotional manipulation to avoid admitting to her faults and the betrayal that went into getting her here is NOT bad writing in itself.

It's bad writing for Sabine. It's bad writing in this show. Because this show has no interest in constructing on character flaws. It won't address that what Sabine is doing here is actually bad, the same way it glamorised and downplayed her fleeing her responsabilities and endangering herself and others for no reason in a speeder chase instead. It's cool girl sstuff, so it stays in.

Does it make a statement about the mental state of a 30 yo character? No.

You're not meant to think about it, because this entire show is written as if it were an animated rebel arc (except now they have to pad for time with long stretches of staring and empty dialogue).

I've already made a post about "A better Ahsoka series", keeping all of the major plot points but changing the characters motivations and dynamics to make the conflict more engaging, but this right here is another great example of wasted drama.

I think a better version of this would have Sabine deflect instead of manipulating Ezra. She literally guilt trips him into stopping with his basic questions!

How about instead she grabs him by the shoulders and says :

"Forget about me for a second, how are you... alive? What happened? How did you escape Thrawn? How have you... Were you all right? Were you... waiting for us? All this time?"

Because those are things that 1/she wants to know and 2/depending on Ezra's answer, maye triple her guild for not getting there sooner and start off the new guilt that she has no plan off planet.

But that shouldn't be her main issue!! She has a way off planet. We cut off in the show to her looking guilty, but ideally when Ezra says "I can't wait to go home!" she should grimace and open up: "look, the good news is that I found you. The bad news is that I hitched a ride here with the people rescuing Thrawn. So he's sort of our only ride back."

And when Ezra starts devising a plan to get aboard the ship, Sabine can cut him off and say sadly it's not just the witches who might sense them, but there are 2 fallen Jedi on world right now, and knowing Thrawn, they'll already be on their trail (remember how Sabine is supposed to be smart?)

THEN we can move into character conflict in which Ezra is upset at the amount of hopeless sacrifice Sabine put in to get to him, and Sabine upset that he got to sacrifice it all but when she does it it's not welcome? You know, idiot dialogue that needs to be vented.

And now Ahsoka's probable death comes into the conversation and changes the tone again. Imagine ending the happy reunion on a scared Ezra asking, "Sabine, what did you do?"

Of course all of this free time would be gained by nuking the Shin and Baylan roaming around aimlessly and discussing vapid stuff they should have covered years ago in their relationship. 5 whole minutes of saved screentime. Also no Ahsoka clip, not considering she makes excuses for Sabine with the concept of 'fate' (very poor taste), and Huyang tells a story of the creation of the galaxy by going "a long time ago in a galaxy far far away", because the only way to get approval for this show is by pressing all the SW buttons in our monkey brains.

5 more minutes unwasted from the shit show to make meaningful character interactions. To make Sabine do the same things but without being an empty sham of a character.

Ezra, a guy who exiled himself to ANOTHER GALAXY with no hope of return to take out a critical enemy, and has been isolated for years, potentially without any human contact... Sees his friend who just found him and eagerly asks : How did you find me? How did you get here??

Sabine, supposedly a good person, who got here by betraying her master's will and last orders and siding with the villains without any backup plan or even a wish to betray or manipulate them : (deep sigh) Let's not talk about that. Not right now.

Ezra, very much entitled to having his most basic concerns answered : Sabine...

Sabine, a manipulative bitch now too, apparently, cutting him off : Hey! I just wanna be happy that I found you. After all this time, can I have that?

Ezra, cucked by the script writers because they can't have the dialogue conflict happen until next episode : Of course.

And you, Ezra, you get nothing. You just get to catter to the selfish desire of the person who didn't come here with a rescue plan for you.

#ezra bridger #sabine wren #actual dialogue #sw negativity #star wars #sw #ahsoka spoilers #anti ahsoka #anti filoniverse

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messers-moony · 3 years ago

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Annotated Books & Sleek Hardcovers | R.B

Paring: Regulus Black X Fem!Lupin!Reader

Summary: Everything told them to be apart, but they said fuck the world.

Inspiration: Click

People would describe the younger Lupin sibling as warm and bright. She shined like the sun and was warm like a sunny summer day. She was the breeze on a warm summer day and the sun on a chilly autumn morning. She was worn books with annotations in the margins, highlighting, and scribbles. She was dependable, sweet, kind, and loving.

Dependable like a best friend. Sweet like Honeydukes chocolate. Kind of like a puppy dog who had been just adopted and as lovable as soft blankets. Her brother was no different. He oozed shyness, charisma, and intelligence. His tousled sandy hair and gleaming green eyes made everyone bend to his will. He didn’t even know that he was doing it.

But by fifth year, Remus Lupin had come out as gay. A month later, Sirius Black was on top of the Gryffindor table with a blushing Remus announcing their relationship. Remus had given his sister a sheepish look as he sat back down. Y/n had just kissed his cheek and smiled.

Y/n and Regulus had been sitting beside each other when Sirius had taken the Great Hall by storm. Instinctively, Regulus tightened his grip on her hand, and Y/n allowed her thumb to run along his. She watched as his shoulders relaxed a prominent amount.

“Well,” Regulus whispered, “I wasn’t expecting that. Did you know?”

Y/n shook her head, “No, but I’m happy for them. Are you?”

“I ‘spose.” Regulus shrugged, “When do you think they’ll find out about us?”

“Remus is a bit oblivious.” Y/n replied, “Sirius doesn’t really turn his head in your direction.”

Regulus looked down at his lap, “So if anything, we’ll have to tell them.”

“Do you think,” His voice was lower than a whisper, “That he’ll ever be my brother again?”

“I do.” Y/n leaned her head on his shoulder, “Siblings have a special bond.”

“I hope you’re right.”

She snorted, “I’m always right.”

At that, he cracked a smile.

Maybe it was her warmth that melted the ice surrounding Regulus’ heart. The icy, cold, Regulus Black. It wasn’t like they were hiding their relationship, but people were terrified to talk about it. They didn’t want to face the wrath of the young Black brother.

Regulus was described as the dark, cold winter nights people despised. The winter nights that were so low in temperature that even staying inside with the heat on, blankets on, and layers of clothes couldn’t warm. He was sleek, hardcover books and soggy leaves in the fall that left you disappointed when the satisfying crunch didn’t echo through your ears.

Regulus Black was everything but warm. He was your least favorite color. Your least favorite food. He was everything you hated. Perhaps it was Y/n’s sweetness that brought some of the crunchiness back to his leaf, the pen to his book, and the folded pages.

They were star-crossed lovers. Everything in the universe was trying to keep them apart from the colors of their robes and the clashing of their personalities. Regulus was the dry autumn and brash winter. Y/n was the prospering spring and hopeful summer. Perhaps they were the best of both worlds, and that’s why they worked together so well.

It wasn’t until their sixth year when their relationship had become the talk of the school. Regulus had begun wearing long sleeves even in the hot months, and people grew suspicious. Only he and she knew what laid beneath that crisp white button-up. Beneath the cold ice he kept around his heart.

Y/n looked around Platform Nine and Three-Quarters for her raven-haired boyfriend as Remus joined his friends on the train. When she did find him, it wasn’t pleasant. Walburga had been fussing with his sleeve, making sure it stayed down, and she had slapped the back of his head for slouching over. Regulus had rolled his shoulders to stand up straight. Orion didn’t look impressed, and Walburga murmured something along the lines of, “Good enough.”

“Now, what do we say, Regulus?”

Regulus caught Y/n’s eyes for just a split second, and he looked away hastily, “Toujours Pur.”

“Good.” Walburga stated, “Now go.”

He nodded and began walking toward Y/n’s general direction. Regulus took her hand in his directing her on another path, “Meet at our usual compartment.”

Y/n gave him a smile in response as she walked away. It left Regulus with a pink hue coating his usually pale skin. His stomach fluttered, and his heart palpitated. They entered the train on opposite sides and met in the middle at their compartment. She was already sitting down when he plopped down beside her. His head was leaning on her shoulder.

“Missed you.” Regulus slurred, sleep evident in his tone, “Wish I could’ve escaped.”

“I missed you too, Reggie.” Y/n took his left hand in hers, “But I know that we have a lot to talk about.”

He tensed, “I suppose we do.”

“Things like what’s on your left forearm?”

“Y/n, please-“

“I’m not mad.”

“But you’re disappointed.”

Her light laugh confused him, “I’m not either, actually.”

Regulus lifted his head to look at her, “You aren’t?”

“I just want to know what you plan on doing with that mark.”

“I don’t have a choice.” Regulus stated, slumping down again, “I have to serve him.”

Y/n hesitated, “You have choices.”

“What are they?”

“Be a spy.”

“A spy?” Regulus queried incredulously, “Are you serious?”

A silly smile graced her features, “Actually. Forget I asked that. Are you daft?”

“No.” Y/n replied, “I’m actually top of our class, so.”

“If he finds out I’m a spy. Then I’d be killed, Y/n.” Regulus said softly, “It’d be different if I didn’t care about anyone. If I had nothing to lose, but I do, and I don’t want to lose a chance at a future with you because of it.”

Y/n took his face into her hands, “You can’t do this. You can’t work for him. You’ll kill yourself slowly anyway.”

“I don’t have a choice.” He wiped a tear from her cheek, “This was bound to happen. This was my fate.”

“Who gives a shit about fate.” Y/n chuckled tearfully, “Professor Trelawney always said that you could change fate.”

Regulus cracked a tiny smile, “You would pay attention in Divination, wouldn’t you.”

“Someone’s gotta give Sirius the notes.”

“Sirius… I didn’t even think about-“ Regulus stopped, “He’s- He’s gonna hate me.”

“Hey, Regulus, look at me.” His breathing sped up, and his hands began to tremble, “Sirius isn’t going to hate you.”

He shook his head, “No, he’s- he’s gonna- I’m gonna-“

Y/n wrapped her arms around him. Regulus nosed at the crook of her neck, breathing in the sweet perfume. The fragrance smelt of crisp apples mixed along with her scent of caramel, chocolate, and marshmallow. It gave him something to focus on, and with his muddled mind, Regulus fell asleep.

Regulus was still asleep three hours later when Sirius came barging into the compartment stopping in his tracks. Y/n brought her index finger to her lips, ordering him to be quiet. Sirius shut the door and sat in front of them. Regulus’ face was out of view from his older brother's. His nose was nuzzled in Y/n’s neck, and his hair hid his face.

“So,” Sirius began quietly, the atmosphere had never been so thick, “How long?”

“Fourth year.” Y/n thought Sirius’ eyes were going to bulge out of his head.

“But you- and him- you don’t-“

“Don’t belong together?”

Sirius nodded, “Who are you to say? Technically I could say the same about you and my brother.”

“Fair point.” Sirius muttered.

It was quiet again, and all that was heard was the slashing of rain on the window of the train, “How- How is he?” Sirius’ voice had never been so quiet before.

“He’ll be okay.”

“What’s that suppose to mean?”

Before Y/n could respond, Regulus began to tremble again. He was trying to dig his nose deeper into her neck and reaching desperately for something to hold onto. Y/n allowed his hand to grasp hers tightly. His trembling subsided, and Y/n gently kissed the crown of his head, allowing him to relax finally.

“How did you do that?”

“Do what?”

“I never-“ Sirius looked shocked, “I could never calm his nightmares….”

Y/n gave him a soft smile, “Perhaps it’s a Lupin talent.”

“Perhaps.” Sirius replied, “But, is he okay?”

“He will be.”

“What does that mean?” Sirius questioned loudly, and Y/n hushed him, “They didn’t- did they?”

She nodded solemnly, “We’re gonna- We’re gonna work through it together.”

Sirius could see her swallowing the lump in her throat. Sirius could see the dullness in her eyes, the same dull that Remus’ eyes got after the full moon. Sirius could always read Remus through his eyes. They were a tell-tale of his emotions. It seemed that he could do the same with Y/n. Her eyes glistened with unshed tears, untold trauma, and unspoken words.

“Take care of him, yeah?” Sirius requested quietly as he stood up to leave the compartment.

She nodded, “Yeah.”

He closed the sliding door quietly. It was a quiet walk back to his own compartment with the Marauders. The task of getting the summer homework to copy turned into an entirely new adventure. Sirius opened the door to his compartment to find James and Peter talking animately. Remus sat with his head against the glass and head in a book. He had some muggle markers beside him that Sirius liked to draw with.

Sirius slumped beside Remus putting space between them. That was the first tell. The second tell was that Sirius didn’t speak, and he stared out to the train's hallway. Remus closed his book, placing it back beside him, and wrapped his arm around his boyfriend's shoulders.

“What’s wrong?” His voice was low and hot in Sirius’ ear.

“Nothing.” Sirius replied, still not looking into Remus’ eyes, “Your sister was no help. Said I needed to do the homework on my own. Said I was a tosser for not doing it.”

Remus snorted and nuzzled his nose into Sirius’ cheek, “Well, perhaps I ought to tell her that’s not how she should speak to my boyfriend.”

“No.” Sirius hated how distant he sounded, “She’s got other things to worry about.”

The lycanthrope furrowed his eyebrows, “Like what?”

“Like you.” Sirius lied like it was nothing, “Who do you think puts hot cocoa and Honeydukes chocolate at your bedside after the full?”

“Then I should give her a sister of the year award.” Remus corrected, and Sirius nodded, “Perhaps you should.”

If only I could get a best brother award, Sirius thought. It was selfish. He knew that. It was wrong to envy Y/n and Remus’ relationship. Unfit to be jealous of his brothers relationship, but he couldn’t help it. Sirius wanted to be the one to chase all of Regulus’ demons away. Sirius wanted to hold him during every thunderstorm as he used to as children. Sirius should be happy for Regulus even if it weren’t because of him.

It took a month before Remus was storming into the common room and yelled insanities at his sister. Remus wasn’t thinking, words fell from his mouth so carelessly, and the entire common room stared as Remus had his sister pushed against a wall, hands holding her up from the collar on her shirt, seething at her.

“You must be one of the stupidest people I’ve ever met.” Remus seethed, and Y/n flinched, “You must be fucking insane.”

Sirius could do nothing but stare, “Maybe I should’ve disowned you as my sister the minute I saw you hanging out with him.”

Tears ebbed at Y/n’s eyes, “But I gave you the benefit of the doubt. I trusted you, and you betrayed me.”

James couldn’t tell what was worse, the fact that Remus was so calm and his voice was so low or when Remus yelled, “You were my everything. My sister, my partner in crime, my other half, and you fucking destroyed it.”

“Mate, stop.” James tried to interject, but Remus just shoved her against the wall harder, and streaks of silver appeared on her cheeks.

“Wonder what dad would do if he found out.” Remus taunted, and Y/n shook her head, “You know how much dad despises them.”

Y/n choked, “Remus-“

“Don’t.” He snarled, “My name isn’t allowed to fall from your mouth. Fucking traitor.”

Sirius had enough, “Remus, stop. That’s enough.”

Remus whirled around, Y/n sliding to the floor, knees to her chest, “Who are you talk? You did the same thing back in fifth year.”

“I’m not your bloody sister.” Sirius snapped, “She’s been there with you through everything. Maybe if you let her explain, then you could understand.”

Remus pointed at her and looked at Sirius with fire in his eyes, “She isn’t my sister. She’ll never be my sister again.”

Sirius could remember the exact same words falling from his mouth only a year earlier, and it crushed him. Y/n was sobbing, and her knees were pulled tightly under her chin. James was trying to console her, but it wasn’t working as Remus and Sirius went toe to toe. Y/n didn’t deserve this for loving who she loved.

Remus scoffed when Sirius wouldn’t back down and stormed up to the boy's dormitory. Sirius knelt before her and lifted her head from her lap. His thumbs wiped away the tears, and he took her into his arms. So much built-up pain, built-up trauma, built-up lies. She was finally crumbling like a tower on an unsteady foundation. Y/n was a one-hundred-story tower that was collapsing from the bottom up.

Debris falling everywhere and soot clouding the atmosphere. He could see the smog slipping in her mind, clouding up her judgment and thoughts. Sirius could see the debris cluttering and scraping away at her heart. With every scrap and every tear, her heart began to give out. It felt like being crushed in an elevator, with no room to breathe and no room for moving. She was stuck, and that was it.

Y/n couldn’t remember much after feeling Sirius’ lips on the top of her head. But she woke up on the plush of the common room couch. The rough maroon fabric was felt beneath her fingertips. Beside her was a boy in an armchair. He was curled up, and a black fleece blanket covered his body from the coldness of the Gryffindor common room.

Beside her was a glass of water and a note. She picked up the water and allowed it to glide down her throat, soothing the ache from her earlier crying. Her nose still felt stuffy, and she willed herself to sniffle quietly, trying not to wake the boy beside her. The parchment was ripped at the edges and was written in beautiful calligraphy.

"Il y a toujours des ténèbres avant que la lumière brille."

She folded the note and placed it back on the side table with the empty glass. The fire had gone out fully in the common room, allowing the temperature in the room to fall. It was cold, dry, and dark. Y/n had never seen the common room so dark. Not a candle was lit, and no light was shining from the windows. Just the slightest bit of moonlight. Gently she stood up and reached for the boy's hand in the armchair.

“Reggie.” Her voice was smooth and soft, “Reg.”

He stirred and opened his eyes to meet his girlfriend's warm ones. Sirius had rushed to the Slytherin common room despite all prejudice. Some of the Slytherins spat at him when he asked for the password. It took ten people before Regulus finally answered to the incessant knocking. He was shocked to be met with his older brother.

There Sirius had told him what happened, how Remus had shoved his sister against the wall accusing her of betraying him for dating him. Regulus felt ashamed. He didn’t want to be the reason they didn’t get to be civil with each other. Sirius even uttered the exact words Remus had, “She isn’t my sister. She’ll never be my sister again.” Regulus had to bite his tongue to stop himself from saying anything.

People stared at the younger Black brother as he walked into the Gryffindor common room. The Gryffindor’s glared, spat, and insulted, but he didn’t care. He found his girlfriend lying on the couch with a thick red blanket surrounding her. Sirius had claimed that Marlene had brought it for her, and Sirius had been the one to move her to the couch. Regulus saw the dried tear stains, the swollen eyes, and the bruised lip.

“It wasn’t pretty.” Sirius had muttered, “Remus isn’t one to hold back.”

Regulus smoothed her hair back, “This is because of me….”

“Reg, no.” Sirius had replied, “Remus will come around. He just doesn’t know how to digest this.”

The common room was silent, and Regulus just held her hand. His thumb stroked the back of her hand softly. Sirius watched as Regulus went through a wave of emotions. He was hurt, confused, concerned, and terrified. It was like watching the seasons go by. Watching everything welt, die, grow back and prosper just to repeat the cycle. It was like watching a new book turn into an old one as the ink was embedded onto the pages, the papers getting folded, tabs being placed, and the spine being cracked.

Regulus appeared to be a sleek hardcover book, but she was his person. She turned him into a used paperback. One with highlighting, tabs, folded pages, a cracked spine, and a loved cover. His heart beat for her. She was the reason he woke up every morning, the reason he ate, the reason he got good marks. She was his reason.

“I tried talking sense into him.” Sirius confessed quietly, “He just brought up the incident in fifth year.”

Regulus closed his eyes tightly and tried to withhold his tears, “Maybe I should talk to him.”

“No.” Sirius said sternly, “You’ll be asking for death.”

“What do I do, Sirius?”

His blue-grey eyes were glittering with desperation, “Nothing… Take care of her.”

With that, Sirius left a kiss on his younger brother's head and left the common room, retreating to the dormitory. Regulus sighed and placed his forehead on the back of her hand. Tears slipped from his eyes and onto the material of the couch. Everyone was gone at that point. The common room wholly cleared and the fire slowly decaying in the fireplace as Regulus Black finally allowed himself to break.

He woke up on an armchair with a soft thick black blanket covering his limbs. Red rimmed e/c eyes met his blue-grey ones, and he felt a wave of relief. Y/n reached her hand out, and Regulus took it, keeping the blanket around his shoulders as she brought him to her dormitory. The girls were sleeping, and Y/n sat down on her bed, Regulus doing the same. She drew the curtains and muttered a silencing spell.

Regulus laid with his head on her pillow, pulling her to lay on his chest. He wrapped the fuzzy black blanket around them. Y/n nuzzled into his side, and he placed a kiss on the top of her head. They didn’t need to exchange words for expressing how they felt. They knew how the other felt. There was no need on elaborating. She fell asleep not too long after, and Regulus laid awake trying of solutions.

Even when the sun broke the horizon, Regulus still had nothing.

They continued the year like this. Remus and Y/n didn’t speak at all anymore. Remus went as far as to change his schedule and ignore the sweets left on his bedside after the full moons. Sirius would pretend it came from him, but Remus still would budge. He would chuck the chocolate in the trash even though he knew that Y/n barely had money in the first place to buy it. He’d dump the hot chocolate in the waste bin and smash the mug to get out any frustration.

Sirius thought that the worst part was Remus never grieved for his sister. He never saw Remus cry or get upset about what he did. It was like Remus had no remorse for what he did. Sirius had grieved. He had sobbed in the midst of twilight with shit silencing charms. Sirius had wailed and clutched his blanket close to his chest, hoping it would soothe the aching of his heart.

When they graduated, Remus didn’t look for his sister in the crowd. He didn’t care if she was there or not, but she was. Y/n was there holding Regulus’ hand tightly, watching her brother shake Dumbledore’s hand. She watched as Sirius embraced Regulus in a tight hug in the shadows. Y/n smiled bittersweetly at their embrace as Regulus took her hand back in his.

Sirius began to open his mouth, “No need to lie. I know he doesn’t care if I was here or not.”

Y/n shuffled on her feet, and Sirius took her into his arms. Sirius was shorter than Regulus, and he didn’t smell the same, but his hugs were just as comforting in a brotherly way. His hand caressed her hair, and Sirius couldn’t help the way his heart ached. He shouldn’t be the one hugging her, Remus should, but he isn’t. Sirius kissed her forehead and released her from his hug.

“I’ll write to you guys.”

“Don’t get into too much trouble.” Y/n replied with tear-filled eyes, “I can’t imagine you gone.”

Sirius smirked, “Yes, ma’am. Don’t you know I always obey the rules?”

“She’s being real, Sirius.” Regulus didn’t crack a smile, “This war isn’t a joke, and I’d- I’d like to see you next year when I graduate.”

“I’ll be there.” Sirius said solemnly, “I won’t leave you guys. They won’t take me alive.”

Y/n cracked a smile, “Good.”

Regulus nudged his girlfriend, and she wiped the tears from her cheeks, “Protect him. He gets reckless and forgets about himself. Don’t let him do anything stupid.”

Sirius could still hear Remus’ voice in their first Order meeting, “I swear on all Merlin if they touch her, they’ll be sorry.”

“‘Course. Don’t forget he’s still my boyfriend.” Sirius replied, and Y/n smiled, “‘S why I’m asking you and not James. Keep- Keep my brother safe, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

They joined the Order of the Phoenix without looking back. Remus, James, Sirius, and Peter quickly became some of the best Aurors of the Ministry of Magic. Sirius had made the Daily Prophet multiple for putting Death Eaters in Azkaban. Many citizens of the Wizarding community thought of him as the next Alastor Moody.

Seventh year was the worst one yet. Most of the Slytherin Death Eaters were attacking the younger kids. Most of the older Gryffindors, Ravenclaws, and Hufflepuffs had to defend them from the unforgivable curses. It seemed normal to hear the crucio curse being thrown away and seeing green flashes. It made Y/n sick to her stomach.

It got so surreal that Y/n and Regulus had begun sleeping behind tapestries or hidden tunnels. Dormitories and common rooms were no longer safe. Their backs ached, and body’s sore from lying on concrete, but it was better than dying. Graduation was not a celebration, and no one from outside was allowed in, but Sirius waited for them at Kings Cross.

The next time Y/n saw Remus was when she was being sworn into the Order, and he barely spared her a glance. Not long after the speech was being spoken, another person entered the meeting point. He was shockingly familiar with wavy black hair and blue-grey eyes. Remus jumped out of his seat, and James had to hold him back. Regulus released a breath and stood beside his girlfriend.

“Now. I’m sure there’s a lot of confusion.” Dumbledore began calmly, “Regulus has sworn to be our spy.”

Remus growled, “He’s a Death Eater.”

“Exactly.” Remus glared at the old Professor, “Therefore, he can enter and participate in their meetings. Then he can come back here and report what he knows.”

“I don’t like it any more than you do.” Regulus said, “I don’t want to put anyone in danger, but someone needs to do it.”

Remus went to speak, but Regulus cut him off, “Someone needs to protect your sister.”

Everyone stared in shock at the bold statement that came from the young Black brother's mouth, and Remus leaped from his seat, “She is a traitor. Just like you.”

Instinctively Regulus moved her behind him as Remus was now face to face with him, “She’s everything but. Wasn’t she the one who stopped Fenrir Greyback from killing you?”

“Shut up.”

“Wasn’t she the one who cleaned your wounds after the full moons before the Marauders?”

“I’m warning you.”

“Wasn’t she the one who used to make you hot chocolate when the nightmares got too bad that you couldn’t sleep?”

Remus snapped, and Sirius pulled him away from Regulus. But they all saw how Y/n cowered when he lunged forward, how she flinched back, covering her face with her hands. Regulus kept a tight hold on her hand, and they watched as Sirius calmed Remus down, bringing him upstairs. When Remus was gone, Dumbledore spoke again.

“Well, the first Order meeting will be announced in just a couple of days. It allows Y/n and Regulus to get in their positions.” Dumbledore announced, “It allows Y/n to get some training and Regulus to get Voldemort’s trust.”

Everyone dispersed. Y/n and Regulus apparated to a flat they had bought in London. It was relatively modern for the time and had everything they needed. The place was clean and brand new. When they landed in the living room, she went straight to the bedroom. Regulus prepared her a hot drink and set it at her bedside table with a warming charm. He laid beside her, placing her head on his heart.

“Je Vous Aime.” His french accent was so smooth and gentle, like a baby blanket, “Je t'aime aussi.”

Everything just got more stressful as time passed. Regulus’ job got more and more dangerous, making Y/n worry profusely. It got to times where they had to pretend to throw curses back and forth so he could prove that he was loyal to them. It wasn’t until a rumor of a spy for the Death Eaters came out that Regulus’ job became crucial. It took three more meetings, and on October 15th Regulus knew who it was.

He could remember the day vividly how Voldemort welcomed Peter Pettigrew to the Death Eaters with open arms. Regulus had stared in mock happiness but, in reality, had been shocked. Someone so close to the Potters had gone and betrayed him. So when Peter was absent from one meeting, Regulus brought it up.

“They spy is Pettigrew.”

“No.” James chuckled, “You’re lying, right?”

Regulus shook his head, “He plans to kill you, Lily, and Harry on Halloween.”

Everyone stiffened. The air was tense, but Dumbledore smiled victoriously, “Beautiful work, Regulus. We’ll apprehend Pettigrew when he’s seen again.”

They had set up a false meeting where Peter got sent to Azkaban only two days later after Regulus announced he was the traitor. That sparked the war between them, and this time, Regulus was on the right side, the side he always wanted to be on. A week later, and on Halloween, Voldemort was dead. Many people's lives were lost, but many were saved.

After the war, Remus had proposed to Sirius, and yet Y/n was still not invited to the wedding. Sirius had begged Remus to make amends with her. The war was over. This nonsense was not needed anymore. But Remus was stubborn, and Y/n was too afraid to approach him, so James gave her the invisibility cloak to watch her brother marry. Not the ideal way she planned on watching her brother and his love get married.

A couple of months later, Regulus and Y/n did the same. Except they did it alone, with Sirius being their only witness and the person marrying them. Sirius couldn’t help but feel awful for Remus not being able to walk her down the aisle, not to see her in the pretty dress she had picked out. It wasn’t until fifteen years later when Y/n had two teenage boys, and a little girl did someone came knocking on her door during the winter holidays.

Both boys were running around the house, and their little sister was trying to keep up. Two twin boys who were fifteen - Romeo and Romulus. A little girl who was just about ten named Ascella. Romulus was a carbon copy of Sirius. Romeo had the Lupin sandy hair and the Black family eyes with the Black family defined face. He was the best of both worlds. Ascella looked like a female Regulus.

Romeo was the Keeper of the Slytherin house for Quidditch. Romulus played Beater for Gryffindor, and little Ascella would get her Hogwarts letter in just about a year. Regulus and Y/n both predicted she’d be in Gryffindor with her brave, mischievous nature. Y/n was the one to get the door with her two boys behind her. Ascella had been called into the living room by her father.

Y/n was shocked to meet familiar green eyes, “Um- hi.”

“Hey.” Remus said nervously, scratching the back of his head, “I hope I’m not intruding.”

Both boys behind her looked confused, “Mum, who is this?”

A pang of hurt hit Remus, “This- This is my brother.”

“Brother?” Romulus questioned, “Like he’s our uncle?”

“Yes.” Y/n retorted, “Now you boys grab your sister. Go do something upstairs while we talk, yeah?”

Romeo looked crestfallen, “Mum, we aren’t five.”

“I know, but we have a lot of talking to do.”

Romeo sighed, “Fine but be safe.”

She kissed the tops of their heads, “Of course.”

Ascella was running to her brothers within seconds after Romulus called for her. Remus saw her black hair flutter around as she followed her brothers up the steps. Y/n smiled and motioned for Remus to come inside. The house was lovely and decorated for the holidays. Y/n walked through the hallway to the living room, and Remus followed.

“I apologize for the mess.” She chuckled, “Having the boys home makes the house messy.”

Remus saw the pictures on the wall, “A Slytherin and a Gryffindor.”

Y/n smiled, “Yep. Romeos the Slytherin, and Romulus is the Gryffindor. We have a feeling Ascella will be in Gryffindor too.”

He placed the picture back down and sighed, “Merlin, what did I miss?”

Regulus was still stiff and stern, “A lot if you couldn’t tell already. That’s what happens when you call your sister a traitor and decide to disown her.”

All three children were listening secretly and grimaced at their father's words, “But don’t worry. I’ve done your job. I’ve been there for her, protected her, and made sure she was happy.” Regulus snapped, “And Sirius did your job of being the children’s uncle.”

“He didn’t even tell me you guys had kids.” Remus muttered, “‘Course he didn’t. In case you don’t remember, you didn’t want anything to do with us.” Regulus retorted.

The children had never heard their father speak this way with so much ice in his words. Regulus was blunt and unapologetic, “We wanted you to be a part of our family, Remus, we really did. But we didn’t know how you’d feel.” Y/n informed.

“Plus, the last time you saw us, you tried to kill Regulus.” Ascella covered her ears, and Romeo ushered them to his room to stop listening, “Yeah, so forgive us for not inviting you to be a part of our family.”

Regulus punctuated his statement by putting his arm around Y/n’s waist, “I’m sorry.” Remus murmured.

“I’m really sorry for how I acted. It was immature and stupid of me.” He continued, “I didn’t know how to feel when I heard my sister was with a Death Eater at the time, and I was just scared.”

Y/n stood up and hugged him, “Remus. What you did isn’t going to be forgiven. I’m sorry.”

He had tears glazing in his emerald green eyes that dulled with age, “I know we were young, but that doesn’t excuse the words you said or how you acted. Trying to kill my husband and saying god awful things about me.”

Y/n took her seat beside Regulus, and Remus sniffled, “You did this. Not us.” Regulus reminded, and Remus nodded.

“Okay, I just- I’ll go.” Remus stood up from his seat and walked down the hallway to the front door; he took in every family portrait.

When he got to the door, Y/n opened it for him, and he walked out, “Remus.”

He turned, and Y/n hugged him one last time. His chin rested on top of her head, breathing in her shampoo that still hadn’t changed since third year. The same perfume from fourth year. Her arms fit around him just the same way as they had when they were little children running around the lake. Y/n kissed his cheek and released herself from his embrace.

“I may not be your sister.” Y/n repeated with tear-filled eyes, and Remus allowed the tears to fall; her two boys were standing beside her, “But you’ll always be my brother.”

The door had closed, and Remus decided that that was the end of his chapter. He had underlined, circled, highlighted, and folded every significant page, but this was the end of the chapter. He was flipping to the next page, where the new chapter began. The new chapter where he had to live without his sister or his niece and nephews.

Remus always loved fragile, cracked paperbacks.

3K notes · View notes

saltymongoose · 2 years ago

Text

🔞 [THE KISS] 🔞 - How They React to a Vampire!Player's Bite ft. The Main 4

I'm so glad to finally be posting this, sorry for the long the wait. 😅 You guys know the deal, minors do not interact in any way, heed the tags and TWs. Other than this, enjoy! <3

(TW: !Minors Do Not Interact!, Extremely Suggestive Content, Yandere, Obsessive Behavior, Biting, Descriptions of Blood, Reader is a sadist again lol) [Part 1 - WORLD WITHOUT LOGOS] ←

As it turns out, your vessels were more than happy to accommodate you in every way possible, and this includes your dependence on vitae - blood.

You'd be lying if you said you didn't expect a positive, if not outright excited reaction to the idea of you feeding on them. (After spending so much time around them, their amusing amount of possessiveness over you wasn't something you could ignore.) However, their complete lack of regard for their own safety was still something you found concerning. Especially when you let them know that you took more than just blood from your vessels.

You let them in on this when you were trying to warn them: “Well, besides the fact that you might die, another effect of a mortal getting fed on by a Vampire is that said Vampire can get your soul, or part of it,” you had said flatly. A look at their stunned and weirdly awe-filled expressions was enough to prompt you to continue before they asked any questions.

"Most kindred don’t have the ability to do that, but I do. It’s one of the things that makes me so powerful if I go overboard with the feeding. If I drain you dry, your entire soul is mine, period. I already know you’re going to ask, but even if I don’t kill you by feeding, and the loss of that part of your soul won’t have much of an effect if any, it’s still important. If I get your blood in my mouth and I swallow it, a part of who you are will belong entirely to me. Forever."

You thought that would be a deal breaker for them. Surely giving up something so important to a monster like yourself wouldn't be desirable in any way, right? Wrong. Which you admit you honestly should've expected.

On the contrary, the thought of you legitimately owning part of their souls was actually exciting to them. Even the more level-headed grunts of your troupe couldn’t help the flush that overtook their faces as they silently mused on how wonderful it’d be to have such a thing happen; to be yours in the most literal sense possible and have the essence of their existence belong to you (as it should). They even thought it sounded romantic, really. Your fated partner having a part of your very being integrated into theirs, so that you’ll never truly be away from them (even in death).

Your vessels were touched by how much you cared about their safety, but that didn’t stop how tantalizing being bitten by you appeared to be. They want you to own them. So no, of course they wouldn’t dare let anyone else have the privilege of receiving “The Kiss” from you (as your kind called it). And you weren't the type to look a gift horse in the mouth (blood from the willing always tasted far better anyway), so you accepted their little proposal, to their absolute delight.

- [HANK J. WIMBLETON] -

Hank has zero hesitancy whatsoever in regard to you biting him, having wanted to bear your mark from the moment you first met. In his eyes, your relationship was one of ownership already; he was your vessel and you were his Player. (The only one he’d allow to control his every movement without question, the individual who he respected and loved enough to give himself to completely.) Being bitten by you would serve to make your claim on him open and obvious, so the fact that you would be bound together through his soul afterward was just a bonus if anything.

Perhaps this is what makes him so incredibly impatient whenever it’s his turn to receive The Kiss from you. His trembling and rushed movements are symptoms of the excitement he feels at getting closer to being marked by you. You can feel it especially well when he's yanked you into his lap, pressing you so tightly together that you have to bend backward to look him in the face. He beats you to it when you try to undo his coat and bandages, nearly ripping the offending cloth away before leaning into your shorter form. (You give him a look when he turns his head to bare his neck to you. It hasn't even been five minutes since you started.) Honestly, it seems like Hank is on the verge of somehow forcing your teeth into his neck himself most of the time.

Biting Hank also comes with an additional stipulation. With most of your vessels, you do a quick bite - one that you can cover up and heal quickly. Thing is, Hank doesn't want you to pierce him with just your canines. Instead, he prefers for all of your teeth to penetrate his skin; the full mark of your bite left indented in his flesh is what he truly needs. You’re fine with it, of course, even if it’s a bit unorthodox for vessels you actually mean to keep alive.

Hank is surprisingly noisy when you feed on him. His breaths grow more and more labored when your maw's sharpened razors begin to stab into him, sinking into his skin easily as you squeeze your jaws down and sending an odd jolt of heat to his lower body. Another harsh nudge of your teeth further into his neck is met with a low groan from him, the noise muffled from behind his mask.

(He's never felt anything like it. The sharp sting blooms into an intoxicating mixture of pain and overwhelming pleasure, only made better by the way he can feel your lips pulling into a smile when he pants.

The haze from your bite clouds his mind until he’s lost in the euphoric feeling of you finally showing him everything you try to hide: The animalistic nature of your hunger that he only sees in fights, the cruel, amused laughs you make when another moan or whine leaves his mouth, and how you nip playfully, painfully, at his bite to elicit more noises from him. It’s overwhelming in the best of ways…but it’s still never enough.)

The slow draw of his blood from you sucking at his wounds makes him want more of something, igniting an urge for him to completely surrender everything to you. It's something you realize early on, with how you're able to read your vessel's minds like this.

He tries to satiate that incessant need by leaning further into your form to try and catch your fangs deeper into his skin, attempting to silently persuade you into making this even bloodier than it began. Perhaps even trying to force you further into his lap, caging you tighter to him in the hopes that the closeness of you pressed against every part of him would somehow stop that hunger for more of whatever you can give him. It doesn't work, though, and you can tell from the way his hips shift underneath you, and the tightening grip that threatens to force the tips of his claws into you that he's getting frustrated with it. (He can’t even explain why he feels so discontent; this is what he wanted, but it still aches. He has to have more, he needs it-)

However amusing (or perhaps even cute) you find his uncharacteristically desperate movements and noises to be, you acknowledge that you probably should give him some small kindness to alleviate that pull you know he’s feeling. Considering how you can't drain him dry, your chosen remedy is simple. Bite him again. The sudden burst of pain is enough to pull a choked moan from him, his purrs rumbling even louder as you tear another deep mark into his flesh. And then you do it again. And again.

You aren't really sure why it works, but you can tell from how the tension in him seems to be winding tight and how his body is starting to tremble that it’s at least a suitable distraction. This, and the fact that the only thing you can read from his mind is a hazy sense of happiness and adoration (odd, considering what you were. If you happened to be more careful in pulling your teeth from him after that, and soothing the wounds with your tongue, then it was purely coincidental.)

Of course, it’s not like Hank always stands perfectly still when you do this. He’s obedient to a fault, especially to you, but you honestly can’t expect him to just sit there and take it when you’re moving around in his lap and marking him repeatedly like that. So when you inevitably end up pinned somewhere with Hank’s panting form looming above you, blood dripping down onto you from the collar of bites you've left on him, you suppose you only have yourself to blame. Tempting the beast, and all that.

Either way, you've probably been full for a few minutes and the extra bites are always more for his benefit than anything. It won’t fully sate that deep-seated need he has for more from you. Nothing will, until you do more to claim him as your kind would.

But watching him almost frantically pull his mask down before slamming his mouth against yours in a bloody kiss, and feeling the way his weight rests on you heavily to seek out more contact tells you that this has been at least somewhat satisfying for him. Although, you'd be a fool to assume he'd calm down quickly from this high you've given him and let you go just because you think you're finished. (If he croaks from blood loss, he figures Doc can just bring him back again. Right?)

- [2BDAMNED] -

2BDamned tries to approach you biting him in a clinical, professional manner, he really does. He insists on doing it in a sterile environment, even taking a shower beforehand so he’s completely clean for you. He sits at his desk and has his tablet in front of him in case he needs to record information on anything odd he’s feeling. He wants to treat these occasions as research in addition to something just to feed you. However, he never actually fulfills that objective, no matter how many times you do this.

Doc tries to ask you questions about the process while you stand over him, lifting his jaw and tilting his head to the side to get a better view of his neck. You find it really funny since it’s obvious he’s trying to get himself together. The cracks in his composure start to show when you bring your face closer to his, and he stumbles over a few words. That’s nothing compared to how he gets when you respond to his inquiries, though, lips and the edge of a sharp canine ghosting over his skin.

(“We’re lucky I’m not from one of the more…picky clans. Some of us can only drink from really specific types of humans, and I’d probably starve if I was restricted by that,” you muse quietly, paying no mind to how your lips press slightly to his throat on some of your words. What you do notice is how 2B’s breath hitches from it. You tilt your head and breathe out a silent chuckle. You can’t even tell if he got anything you just said. “What, no questions?” He flinches a bit. So he wasn't focusing on what you were saying. How interesting.)

His hold on his composure only slips further once you bite him. The press of your teeth is met with a sharp inhale, and he tenses up when they pierce his skin. You won’t hear any obvious noises from him, at least nothing he doesn’t attempt to muffle. With your hearing though, it isn’t difficult to pinpoint the little gasps he tries to hide when you nudge your sharp fangs a little deeper into his flesh, nor is it hard to tell that he's fighting to keep his breath stable.

He’ll try to continue asking questions, only to fade off in the middle of them, completely losing his train of thought as you drink from him. In Doc's defense, having you so close and sucking at his neck is enough to stop him from thinking; his head feels fuzzy, and he isn’t sure if that distinct warmth he feels building in him is from your vampirism or your traits as the Player. He can admit to himself that it feels...good. Too good, actually. It's enough to make him achingly self-aware of his own reactions, and to compel him to at least try not to act so “out of line” with you there.

(You're someone he considers a sort of superior; your status as his Player demands the utmost respect; even if you're biting his neck and draining his blood, he has to keep some level of decorum with regard to that. It's difficult, with how a large part of him wants to just give in to the feeling of you, but he tries to manage it.)

Sometimes you might try to get him to let go of this facade he's so desperate to hold onto. (You don't want him worrying about something like this since it really doesn't matter to you, and the experience would be so much better for him if he just relaxed for a change.) This could mean letting your tongue linger for a bit longer as you lick up his blood, or nibbling at the edges of the wound harshly so the bruise of it'll stay for a while longer.

Does it work 100% of the time? No. But it's a convenient challenge to focus on when you're ensuring your focus doesn't fall entirely into draining him. Though if you want a guaranteed way to break Doc, you found that outright telling him how good you think he tastes works exceedingly well. It's enough to make him choke back a small moan, so you consider it a success. The blush you see sweeping across his skin, even visible on his jaw and neck, makes it even better.

2BDamned knows that you do this just to make his attempt at a professional demeanor slip. It's obvious from how he can feel you grin once you manage to get something substantial out of him, which causes his face to burn hotter. He doesn't know what to do with the knowledge that you seem genuinely pleased when this happens, and embarrassingly enough, he can even feel himself beginning to purr when it does. He stiffens when he feels the rumbles starting to build up; it's like that animalistic part of him is satisfied by how happy you are when his instincts begin to break through. (They are an important part of him, even if he keeps it hidden most of the time.)

2B also tends to go far longer than the others do with letting you feed. He’ll allow you to drink from him for a concerning amount of time before doing anything to try and alert you, whether it be outright telling you that he can’t go on further or tapping you to signal that something’s changed in his condition. Even if he's starting to feel exhausted, he doesn't feel the need to stop you. Not with his claws digging painfully into the palms of his hands as he fights the urge to make more noises (he'd die of mortification if he lets another loud whine slip from him again). Not even when he shifts back into his seat to stop from squirming too much at the euphoric feeling of you draining him. The motivation just isn't there.

He'd never openly admit it, but he feels far too good to. (And it's not like he can think of a pragmatic way to do it with his head so foggy.) It's probably because of your abilities, but he also concludes it's also connected to how he's essentially being marked by you. Claimed as yours in the way that grunts have always staked such importance on. He likes it, to put it simply. It's fulfilling, and he relishes in the event as much as he can. Of course, you receiving part of his soul along with his blood was not something he initially expected, but with Nevada's poor excuse of an afterlife, he thinks it's the best option. He wants to give all that he was to you, and you spending so much time marking him worked perfectly with that. Even if it makes him weak, why would he ask you to quit when the positives so obviously outweighed the negatives?

This means it typically falls on you to stop this, which you do with little fanfare. You may or may not press a little kiss on his jaw to soothe him after working over the wound with your tongue (just so it heals up all nicely, an effect of your saliva), earning another pleased sigh from him, but you hold off on a lot of what you could do. You figure with how Doc is, the nicest thing is to let him try to regain his composure. Even if it takes a lot, with how boneless he looks under you and how red he is, even with all that blood loss. You can tell his heart is beating unnaturally fast, but you're blind to how he's looking at you in an almost lovesick daze. You smile at him and he shifts in his seat. You still have his blood on your lips.

At this moment, he usually wonders if it's disappointment he feels at you not continuing and doing more with him. It only takes receiving your Kiss a few times to realize that this is entirely correct, and a couple more for him to start formulating ways to get you to stay.

- [SANFORD] -

For someone who faces the chance of getting grievously injured nearly every day, Sanford is surprisingly nervous leading up to your bite. He doesn’t talk that much or shift around a lot, instead just fidgeting a little with his hands and stiffening up when you come closer. It’s almost like he’s trying to mentally prepare himself for it, which you can understand. Being bitten by you is incredibly overwhelming, even for other vampires.

You’re more gentle with Sanford from the get-go since you don’t want to take him off guard too much or make him uncomfortable. The added gentleness is obvious from how you softly rest your hands on him and slowly work him through some of the steps you’re doing, even outright telling him when you're about to bite him. You're careful in a way you rarely show to others, and it makes his heart start to beat faster before your lips even touch him.

Sanford is incredibly restrained whenever you officially start one of these encounters. The nervousness shows, but he tries to steel his facial expression to keep it down, biting back a noise when you finally cut into him with your teeth. He can feel your hands moving, fingers tracing comforting circles as you tighten your jaws to pull blood from him, and he shifts slightly, turning his head to both bare his neck more to you and hide his flustered expression. You haven’t even really begun draining him, but he’s already getting overwhelmed.

(A reaction he blames on how grunts are. It’s only natural to get flustered if someone you like romantically incidentally claims you with a piercing bite, especially when it’s in such a visible spot. He knows you're aware of this too, which only makes the reaction worse. Is it really so outlandish to assume that you welcome this idea of officially staking a claim on him, since you showed zero hesitance to continue after being informed? He hopes not.)

The grunts have always felt very warm to you due to your vampirism, but you’re a little shocked by just how hot he feels. If it were Deimos, you could blame it on pyrokinesis, but with Sanford it's more worrying. You were relieved to find that it was simply his blush that made him like this. It seems this flusters him more than you initially thought it would. (How odd it is, that he’s able to get so red when you’ve started draining him of his blood.)

To your joy, you can actually feel him relax into your grip when you gingerly remove your teeth, even if he tenses up the slightest bit when you run your tongue over the opening you made, testing to see if the bite was deep enough. Honestly, Sanford thought it’d be painful at first, maybe with some numbness mixed in. But when your lips seal onto his neck and you suck at his split skin, he realized that it’s the exact opposite. The feeling of your mouth on him, pressing roughly onto his flesh as you tongue at the cuts where his life essence spills from is one that makes heat curl in his gut.

Despite how hard Sanford tries to remain quiet, not wanting to be inappropriate when you’re only doing this for food, he can’t stop noises that leave his throat; little cut-off moans and deeper groans, even a few breathy whines and gasps. He's purring too of course, the rumbling echoes in your ears while you busy yourself with pulling blood from his body.

It's shameful for him since he worries he's putting you off by acting this way, but he just can't stop it. It feels so good, to have you leaving a mark on his flesh and pressed so close to him. The painful sting of the wound only elevates the sensation, and the tension in him winds tighter every time your sharp teeth graze him. He has to do something with this weird longing he feels, whether it be making noises or subconsciously reaching up to rest his hands on you to ground himself. You let him pull you closer with no complaint.

You really don't care about how he acts, of course; it's a completely natural reaction to what you're doing. The biggest reaction you'll give is a chuckle when he gives a particularly loud moan, or a small exhale in amusement when you notice how his hips jolt when your thighs brush his. Seems noises aren't all you can get from him if the way he seems to seek contact with all of you is any sign.

Shame can wait until after you're finished, when the high of having you biting him and sucking his blood has faded away. At the moment, he's too lost to the heat from your actions and the hazy, painful pleasure of your Kiss. It's paired with an odd duality from you; the gentleness you show in all aspects except for the way you nip at his skin and suck harshly, as though you want the "hickey" you leave to last for days afterward. He can't tell if he feels lightheaded from blood loss or just being overwhelmed by your actions, but either way, he wants more.

(Or perhaps he just wants you to desire more from him. He knows you already get a part of his soul from this, but he still aches for you to take him completely. He knows that it's probably an irrational thought, since this is probably just a side effect of losing a part of himself, but the overwhelming need is still there.)

However, Sanford at least has the sense to stop instead of insisting you go on. You don't often push him too far, but if he ever feels like he's starting to get too weak, he'll tell you as best he can manage. (Or maybe just nudge you pointedly if he can’t muster the words, which happens.) You're quick to pull away as soon as you notice, taking a quick glance over him to check for any serious signs of blood loss. It’s nothing too bad but you still agree that you should stop, so you give him a soft look before slowly returning to the wound to close it. He shudders when he feels your cold tongue swiping over him, and you pause for a moment to make sure he’s alright before continuing. You’re honestly really sweet to him when you end your “sessions”; you even whisper a small thank you to him after you’re completely finished, sometimes accompanying it with a soft peck to his cheek.

Sanford questions if he’s more embarrassed by his reaction to your bite, or at how something so simple and innocent almost makes him just as flustered. In any case, it’ll provide him enough motivation to ask you to stay, at least for a little while. He’d like the company while he recovers, he reasons, and you accept the proposal every time. It’s a good way to monitor him (plus it’s just nice to cuddle into Sanford's side while he rests, not gonna lie). If Sanford happens to play up his condition a little more to get you to remain with him for another hour or five, then the others will just have to put up with it. (Forever would be better, he'd muse to himself as he tightens his arms around you...Maybe becoming a Vampire wasn't such a bad idea after all.)

- [DEIMOS] -

If there’s one word you would use to describe how Deimos acts when you bite him, it’s restless. His clawed fingers tap repeatedly on your waist and thigh as you loom over him, and he squirms with anticipation when you bring your face closer to his skin and your hands move up to pull his coat off his shoulders. No matter how you try to ease him into it, whether by doing it when you’re already cuddling him or during your other more comfortably intimate moments, he just doesn’t stop fidgeting.

(If you were someone with less experience (or maybe if Deimos had been anyone else), you might’ve been annoyed. But you were in no rush, and truthfully, you found it to be a little endearing.)

This doesn’t stop when you actually bite him, either. He might pause and hold his breath when your lips brush his skin, swallowing roughly when you stop over a spot you like, but this halts the moment your teeth actually pierce him. A loud cry will leave his lips before teetering off into an airy whine, his legs knocking into yours as his hips jolt under yours, forcing you to rebalance yourself as you instinctually clamp your jaws down a bit tighter. Something you’d do as a warning for your more expendable sources of blood, but the pain just forces another raspy moan from him.

Deimos is one of the quickest to fully lose himself to the sensations of you biting him, his mind going fuzzy and thoughts spiraling until the only thing that’s tethering him to the moment is you. Maybe it’s something about you being a vampire, or that it’s you who’s doing it to him, but the only thing he can focus on is your lips pressing roughly to his skin as you suck his blood into your mouth, your hands cradling him so carefully, and the weight of you over his body.

Deimos is probably one of the most vocal vessels you’ve had the pleasure of drinking from as well. His whines, raspy moans, and ardent praises fill your ears when you suck at his wounds, lapping his life essence up with restrained delight. During those few seconds where you have to pull your lips away to reorient yourself (mainly to stop from getting too into it and draining him dry), he whimpers little pleas for you to come back.

(“Fuck-wait, nonono, don’t stop, please.” He begs, trying to hold you tighter when he feels you wrench your mouth away from him with a wet squelch. No, you can’t leave him like this, you wouldn’t- You just laugh and hold him tighter, pressing a few bloody kisses to his jaw in a move that makes him blush a deeper shade of red, if that’s even possible.)

If it weren’t for the fact that everybody knows what you’re doing, you might’ve considered using your abilities to stop him from being so loud. You happen to find it extremely amusing (and perhaps a little cute) though, and the self-satisfaction of reducing him to such a messy state is enough to stop you from even dwelling on the idea. Come to think of it, messy really is the perfect adjective to describe the state you reduce him to when you drink.

Especially with how his noises rise slightly in pitch with each rough suck to his wound and his clawed fingertips scratch at your skin, hips bucking up while he squirms underneath your form like he’s trying to seek out friction from you. The only intelligible words from him are little praises, curses, and begs, intermittent with panting, moans, and raspy purrs. It’s so funny, just how little inhibition he has with acting this way around you. Not that you blame him that much; it’s normal, and he just can’t help himself.

(This won’t stop him from being mortified by his behavior afterward. Even if you’re okay with it, since it’s pretty natural for those you feed on, you still shouldn’t be seeing him like this when the situation shouldn’t call for it. It just isn’t proper. Then again…what if you like it?)

Sometimes, if you’re feeling particularly generous, you’ll brace a hand on his chin, tilting his head down as you remove your bloodied mouth from his neck and allowing him to regain at least some of his composure. It doesn’t work a good majority of the time, since he typically just whines out a complaint and arches his back as a way to try and return that closeness you had before. You still ask questions about how he is to try and bring him back to the moment (“Dei, you feeling alright? Lightheaded? Dizzy?”), because you're responsible enough to make sure he isn’t too out of it. A sly grin spreads across your face when you lean closer and delicately wipe the drool from his lips with your thumb, gauging his facial expression as you wait for some semblance of a response. (Again, very messy.)

Occasionally you don’t get one though, because even if he’s suffering from the effects of blood loss, most of the time he won’t even acknowledge it. This is partly due to how your abilities work to dampen that realization (something you try to lessen by stopping for those few minutes), but more importantly because he just really wants your mouth back on him. Even if he’s starting to feel a slight weakness creeping up on him and his pulse is rising dangerously high, the sensation of your lips on his jugular and your tongue lapping at his wounds fills him with an odd, stirring warmth that’s just too good.

You’d say that Deimos is lucky you have a lot of self-control for a vampire, otherwise you think you'd completely devour him. His blood is almost addictive; thicker than the others is due to the nicotine he consumes, and almost sticky. It’s like syrup to you. The reactions you get out of him just make the idea more tempting, especially since you can tell that he seems to desperately need more contact with you, to press together and have you swallow him whole so you'll never be apart. But you can't do that.

By the time you’re finished with him, he looks utterly debauched. Purring and in a strange trance as he looks at your blood-coated lips, another desperate noise leaving him when you lean back further. It'll take him a while to recuperate and get back to "normal" after this, so you keep an eye on him for the time being. It's not like it's difficult to justify when he hasn't actually let you go yet.

A small thought comes to Deimos' mind when you start to clean him up, gently swiping the residual blood away from his skin with your tongue, your saliva working quickly to heal up his wounds. Maybe he can get you to leave the bite next time? Or better yet, make it permanent?

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