#the lie about wanting to looking around in the tunnel for five more minutes always gets to me
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cdyssey · 7 months ago
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the eldest river in "the impossible astronaut" is always so fucking distressing to me in hindsight. the way she knows what's going to happen at lake silencio, but she can't say anything to the people she loves most. she constantly has to lie, always has to play pretend. spoilers. the fate of the entire universe depends on it.
and the doctor, her doctor, doesn't trust her because of it.
because of all the lies. because of what she has to do to necessarily protect them both.
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how she has to revisit her ugly childhood and fractured youth and watch it from afar, incapable of helping that scared little girl in a spacesuit, the young woman submerged in the water.
and she watches her husband and parents, too—watches them watching her own making—and they don't even know it.
There's this exchange between her and her mother that becomes all the more harrowing when you realizing that she's talking about herself.
River: I know what you're thinking. Amy: No, you don't. River: You're thinking, "If we can find the spaceman in 1969 and neutralize it, then it won't be around in 2011 to kill the Doctor." Amy: Okay, lucky guess. River: It's only because I was thinking it, too.
and then there's the moment where she catches a glimpse of the Silence in the tunnels and all that pain and trauma comes rushing back to her in an sickening instant, and even when they disappear from her memory, that horror still lingers in her body, but she pretends to keep it together anyway for other people's sake anyway.
in those dark tunnels, she only allows herself five minutes to fall apart away from prying eyes.
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and she would have gotten away with it, too, had her father not shown up. he's concerned—even though he doesn't know her very well yet—and he's there, and he's asking all the right questions.
Is she okay? what did she mean when said there's a worse day coming for her?
And River opens up to him in a way that we've rarely seen her do.
River: The trouble is, it's all back-to-front. My past is his future. We're traveling in opposite directions. Every time we meet, I know him more, he knows me less. I live for the days when I see him, but I know that every time I do, he'll be one step further away. And the day is coming when I'll look into that man's eyes, my Doctor, and he won't have the faintest idea who I am. And I think it's going to kill me. 
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fucking gutting.
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casspurrjoybell-33 · 8 months ago
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Wreckless - How Do I Fix It
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*Warning Adult Content*
Finnegan
Did I hear him right?
We were really, really close to some amazing sex not that long ago and that offer is pretty, well, blatant.
But I'm... What?
Did he really say that?
"Emmett?"
"Your call, you know I'm more than happy either way."
"If you wanted to fuck we could have been doing that for the past twenty minutes instead of this bullshit. I was... I was good, Emmett. Why'd you?"
But that's not fair, it's always been his choice to humor me and...
"I don't expect it, I'm sorry. I just... I needed it. I need to be 'Finn' today and now it's..."
This time I let him pull me into his arms.
"I'm sorry. I panicked and freaked out and... look... I've been wanting you to be 'Little'... every day I hoped... it's the day and you're struggling and I get that and now I know that my house is part of the problem."
"So I came here. I wanted... I thought about going to see Rhys. I was just gonna tell you I had to work and go up there, you said it's not too far, right? I needed to relax but I don't want to lie to you so I realized maybe I could do it here. And..."
"And I ruined it."
He sighs and kisses my neck.
"I'm sorry. How do I fix it?"
"I doubt, fucking you, will do the trick, Emmett."
Not that I'm not a little bit interested, I am. I mean, damn he'd sound pretty if what I heard over the phone is any indication.
God, he has such good dirty talk when he tops, I wonder... man.
MAN.
But when I'm pissed?
When we're having such a shitty day?
"We could go to the arcade or to play golf or something fun. There's a big waterpark not far from here. I saw the signs."
That sounds okay and it might do the trick but I've been around people all week and it just seems hard.
Clothes, driving, doing things.
"I don't know."
"Or we could look at houses, see what's around that you might like. I can help with neighborhoods."
Is he possibly that okay with it?
He can't be, maybe I should give him a few more days for this to sink in.
"Okay, how many bedrooms?"
I guess we're doing this.
"At least three.  An office and a guest room."
"Yeah, no reason not to. Baths?"
"One and a half but I'd rather two or two and a half, depends. Need a place to piss on the first floor and a master bedroom en-suite."
"Got it. For the record, I would have been pissed if you'd gone to see Quincy without me, especially if you lied about it."
"I know. I didn't do it, I thought about. I was trying to get to sleep one night and wondered if Rhys has a little kid room, you know? Like full of toys and games I thought... I guess I thought he might help me get into headspace and I could relax and it sounded great but I realized it would hurt you so here we are."
"Here we are. Okay, bathrooms done. What else?"
"A garage. Two cars."
I do not shovel snow... No. 
We talk about the yard and prices and apparently Baltimore is cheaper than a lot of cities. 
"And whatever you want, Emmett. It's your house too. Do any of them have gyms?"
"That would be sweet but it's not an option to search by."
"Get more square feet, may have room to sneak one in. How big is your place?"
"Um, six or seven hundred I think. I don't remember."
Add an extra bedroom, a bigger kitchen, a gym, and some more elbow room in general.
My folks house is about four thousand but we don't need that much space.
I have no need for a formal library.
"So find something with at least fifteen hundred."
He sucks in a breath.
"Alrighty. So, location? You wanna stay near the factory I assume."
"And near Wrecked, for you. I need decent access to DC and I'm not sure how the tunnel works with all that. I'd really rather not be in the heart of the city. Somewhere safe, Emmett."
"Okay, there are like seven here that could work. Take a look."
He hands me his cell-phone and watches over my shoulder.
The first one is ugly and the second isn't even built yet but the third and fourth are both really cute.
Five and six are hideous inside but seven passes my rudimentary inspection.
"Will you come look at them with me? Next weekend?"
I hope that's enough time for him to get used to the idea.
"Yeah, you're not going to get in right away so we should get started. I'll be working in the morning but I'm off on Friday if it helps."
"Emmett?"
"Yeah darling?"
"Thank you."
That deserves a kiss and he gets one.
"You're welcome. Should have done it two weeks ago but I just... well I hoped you'd be okay."
I don't expect to fall in love with a house this weekend and he's right, even if I do it'll be a month or two before we move in.
Still, getting into a couple and finding out what each of us likes will be a big step.
I'll get to see a few different areas and maybe that will help narrow down our search.
I feel better just knowing it will happen, that we're moving in the right direction.
"I'll be fine, Emmett."
I really doubt there will be any more 'Finn' this weekend but fucking Emmett is starting to sound like almost as much fun.
"Is your ass still there for the taking?"
He chuckles.
"For the taking. God Finnegan. And yes, yes it is as long as I can return the favor."
"That you can. We should fuck each others brains out and then get in the jacuzzi to soothe our aching everything." 
I don't know if it'll work but it might so I throw it out there. 
"If you really teach me a lesson, maybe I can get 'Little Finn' back."
"I will do anything you can handle, darling. You deserve to relax the rest of the weekend."
I do and part of me thinks he needs it too.
I think us not being 'Emmett and Finn' accounts for half of the awkwardness between us. 
"Hey, even if it doesn't work we'll both be much less stressed out." 
Getting through a few more weeks or even two months without much 'Finn' will be hard but at least there's an end... you know?
A light at the end of the tunnel.
Time to find out how Emmett likes to be fucked. 
I am 100 percent going to grab his hair. 
Yes, yes I am.
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helliontherapscallion · 4 years ago
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(Y/n) and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Week: Thursday (Part 1)
Monday     Tuesday     Wednesday     Thursday (Part 2)     Friday     Saturday     Sunday
Spotify Playlist (collaborative)
Warnings: swearing, homophobia (f slurs and d slur), panic attacks, toxic friends, mentions of attempted suicide/getting told to kill yourself
Word count: 6,377
(A/N): ok, so I definitely got carried away with this, so I had to split Thursday into two parts. If I kept it in one part, it’d probs be like 10k-11k words long lmao
You woke up feeling strangely more refreshed than usual. Glancing at your clock, you saw that you actually woke up about thirty minutes before your alarm went off. You got a whopping twelve hours of sleep, a stark contrast from your recent sleep schedule consisting of no more than four hours a night. You felt like you could rule the world with how much energy you had. Sure, you felt anxiety pooling in your stomach like you usually did and you had a terrible dream about Haley rejecting you and getting completely outed to the entire school, but that did not stop you from throwing your covers off your bed and walking down the hall to the kitchen with the most confidence you’ve had since starting high school.
When you got to the kitchen, you saw a dead looking Uncle Schlatt slumped at the table chugging coffee and a chipper Philza trying to make conversation. Usually, you would’ve joined Schlatt in being dead inside, but today was different. You were filled to the brim with energy that you haven’t had in years. As you walked through the door, their heads turned towards you.
“Mornin Dad, mornin Uncle Schlatt!”
Your uncle merely grunted before going back to guzzling down his coffee. Your dad smiled at you, “well, looks like someone’s well rested.”
“Yeah, I got like twelve hours of sleep last night.”
“Glad to hear it, hun. You really needed it.”
“Glad to hear someone’s feeling well rested,” your uncle grumbled into his coffee. 
“Schlatt, don’t be such a downer all the time,” Philza rolled his eyes at your uncle. 
“Fuck you Phil, I’m a ball of fuckin sunshine. Ain’t that right, sweetheart?” 
“Yeah, Dad, I don’t know what you’re talkin about. Uncle Schlatt’s the heart and soul of this house. Even if he doesn’t live here.”
Schlatt gave a booming laugh, “suck it Phil. And that, (y/n), is why you’re my favorite niece.”
“At least I’m someone’s- wait. I’m your only niece.”
“Still my favorite niece!”
You grinned happily, that was better than nothing. “Love ya, Uncle Schlatt!”
Your uncle’s cocky grin turned more sincere and he diverted his full attention to you, “love ya too, kid.”
“Love each other quieter, you woke me up.” Wilbur’s tired voice complained as he walked into the room and slumped into his chair next to Schlatt. Schlatt clapped a hand onto his shoulder and rustled his hair.
“My man! How’s Sally, huh?”
Wilbur flushed red and started sputtering as Philza turned his confused gaze to his son. “Who’s Sally, Wilbur?”
You couldn’t leave your brother high and dry when he accepted you for being yourself so readily yesterday, so you quickly jumped in for him. “Sally’s just one of his friends at school. They’re job shadowing together for their project. Right, Wilbur?” You turned towards the flustered man with a somewhat forced smile and raised eyebrows. He looked at you with immense relief and nodded vigorously, his hair flopping onto his forehead. 
“Yes! We’re planning on job shadowing our band director, he said that it’d be a good idea if we want to major in music.” 
“Oh, why didn’t you tell me about her before! You should invite her over for dinner, I’d love to meet her!” Oh, your dad did not buy your terrible excuse for Wilbur, that man is like a bloodhound when it comes to sniffing out lies. Poor, poor Wilbur. 
Despite the blush remaining on his cheeks, Wilbur seemed to think that Philza actually bought his weak excuse. “I’ll invite her over soon. Does Friday night next week work?”
Philza grinned cheekily, “yes! I can’t believe you haven’t brought her over sooner if you’re close enough to job shadow with her!”
At this point, Schlatt’s face was cherry red with his almost failed attempt to hold in his laughter. “I’m not missin this. Me an’ Tubbs are comin over next Friday.” 
Wilbur still hasn’t noticed that they hadn’t bought it, you thought he was more perceptive than that. Eventually, Philza started to make breakfast and conversation lulled into a comfortable silence as everybody waited for Techno, Tommy, and Tubbo. Deciding to pull out your phone, you scrolled through your notifi- wait. Why did you have forty-two messages from Adrian and Sammy? Why did they make a groupchat with everyone except Annie? Furrowing your brows in confusion, you opened the group chat. What you read made your breathing catch in your chest and your skin blanch, it wasn’t a dream. Everything was real.
Sammy <3
(y/n) you fucking pervert
How could you do this to us????
Adrian <3
We’ve given you everything and yet you’re still a disgusting person. 
Fucking faggot
We thought we could fix you, but you’re broken
You’re always going to be
Sammy <3
And now, you’re gonna go to hell with all the other dykes and fairies.
It’ll probably be heaven for you, surrounded by perverts like yourself
You’re staying far away from Annie
Adrian <3
You’ve put her through so much shit and now this
We swear to god if you talk to her again we’re gonna make you wish you would’ve gone through with killing yourself freshman year
We’re leaking the pictures slut
You felt your anxiety melt away into betrayal. So they were yours and Haley’s stalkers? How dare they try to leak Haley’s pictures. They could leak yours, you didn’t give a shit if yours were leaked. You could learn to live with it, you always did after all the shit you put yourself through throughout the years, but Haley’s? She didn’t do anything. Even if her rejection was painful, you still deeply cared for her. She didn’t deserve that. You, however, did for not being normal. For making people around you uncomfortable with your presence. 
(Y/n)
That was you guys?????
Why the fuck would you do that
I trusted you 
All of you
Sammy <3
We trusted you too dyke
But you’re a two-faced bitch
And to think we actually thought you were our friend
Were you only friends with Ann and I so you could get into our pants?
I’m disgusted
You’re a fucking pervert.
Adrian <3
We shouldn’t have talked you out of suicide freshman year
You fucking deserve it
Make Annie’s life easier and just swan dive off a roof
You’ll be doing everyone a favor
(Y/n)
Listen, I don’t care if you leak my pictures.
Just don’t leak Haley’s
She has no part in this
I’ll leave you guys alone if you delete Haley’s pictures
Hell, I’ll do anything for you if you could release them after the final volleyball match today
It’s Haley’s time to shine and she deserves the attention as team captain
She’s worked so hard to get there all of high school and leaking my nudes would take the attention away from her
Let her have her moment
Sammy <3
For once she has a point
She probably manipulated the poor girl
Who knows what the fag would’ve done to her if we didn’t expose her
Adrian <3
Fine, we’ll delete Haley’s pictures and we’ll wait until after the game
But we’re leaking yours
You deserve it for what you did to Annie and Haley
“Kid, are you okay? You’re kinda pale over there buddy.”
Looking up from your phone, you saw everybody’s eyes on you. They each looked concerned, but Wilbur even more so. He was the only one in the room at the moment that knew about your panic attacks. He stood up from his spot and walked over to you with long strides.
“She just remembered the homework in stats that we forgot about. Techno asked us in the group chat about it, we were just about to go and see if he could help us.” 
“But Wilbur, I thought you took statistics last year.”
“No, that was algebra two, I’m taking stats this year,” that was a lie, he was in pre-calculus this year. “C’mon (y/n), lets go finish that assignment.” 
He grabbed your shoulder and hauled you into a stand before grabbing your hand and practically dragging you up the stairs and into Techno’s room. Said pink-haired teenager looked up angrily. “What’d I say about kno- (y/n)?”
Wilbur closed the door and locked it behind him. He dragged you over to Techno’s bed and sat you down on the edge before kneeling down to look you in the eyes.
“(Y/n), can I touch you? Is that alright?”
After you shakily nodded, he grabbed your hand and placed it over his chest. “Breathe with me.” Like yesterday, you tried to copy his movements, but it wasn’t working. Your panic attack was just getting worse by the minute. Techno pushed Wilbur aside and took his place kneeling in front of you and grabbing your hand, rubbing his thumb over your knuckles.
“(Y/n), can you tell me five things you can see around the room?”
When you didn’t move your wide eyes away from Techno’s face, he frowned and gently squeezed your hand. “You can get through this. What’re five things you can see around the room?”
You reluctantly tore your eyes away from his face and peered around the room. You hadn’t noticed that your blurred vision had tunneled until you realized that you couldn’t see anything in your peripheral vision. Your unseeing eyes flicked around the room. 
You tried to swallow, but you couldn’t do anything through the lump in your throat. With a shaky voice, you gasped out “I-I can’t breathe. I-”
“Deep breath in through your nose and out through your mouth. Follow me.”
You tried to breathe with him, and you eventually got to the point where you could speak. Your eyes flicked around the room once again and slowly recognized your surroundings. 
“You�� Wilbur… Desk… Window…”
“That’s good, just one more.”
Your eyes flicked around the room, “...Book.”
“Look back at me, you’re doing so good,” when you looked back at him, he had a small smile on his face. “Nice job. Now, four things you can feel. Can you do that for me?”
You shakily nodded and looked at your hands and around your surroundings. “Bed… Pants… You… Carpet.”
“Three things you can hear?”
“You… Birds… Breathing.”
“You’re almost there, I’m so proud of you. Two things you can smell?”
“Toast and… and burning?”
Despite his confusion about the sudden burning smell, he continued to smile at you. “Good, last one. One thing you can taste?”
You licked your lips before scrunching your nose slightly, “...snot.”
“Wilbur, can you go get her a few kleenexes and a glass of water?” Techno asked his brother without taking his eyes off you.
Wordlessly, he swiftly left the room. “Are you feeling better?”
You panted as you reached up to rub at your teary eyes, “yeah, how’d you know what to do?”
His smile turned slightly bashful, “I did some research last night. I’m glad I did, that was a bad panic attack. Can I- can I ask what caused it?”
You pulled out your phone and handed it to him, letting him scroll through the messages while you brought up your knees to your chest and rested your chin on your knees. You felt tired after that attack, however you had a little bit more energy than you usually did. Only a little bit more. It was probably because you slept for half the day and through the night yesterday. You watched your brother scroll through your texts with tired eyes. 
He was emotionless as he scrolled, making you somewhat scared about what his reaction would be. He probably hasn’t gotten to the whole “go kill yourself” or the stalking parts. Judging by his set jaw and labored breathing, he was pissed already and he didn’t even get to the bad parts yet.
In the middle of his scrolling, Wilbur came back with a box of tissues, a glass of water, and a plate of bacon, eggs, and toast. When you hardly moved to grab them, he sat on the bed beside you and handed you a tissue. After cleaning up, you took the glass of water and started to slowly sip at it. “Thanks, Wil.” 
He wrapped an arm around you and pulled you close to him. When he looked over Techno’s shoulder at your phone, you saw his eyebrows furrow. “Tech, what’s-”
He was interrupted as Techno shoved your phone into his hands and stood up to start pacing around his room. “Read it yourself.” He sounded more monotone than usual. He was absolutely furious.
You watched Wilbur’s face as he read through your messages. Unlike Technoblade, he looked furious. His eyes were set ablaze as his entire face turned an angry red. “(Y/n), what the absolute fuck? Why didn’t you tell us this was happening?”
Shrinking in on yourself and pulling your knees closer to your chest, you murmured out a small “sorry.” You saw him quickly turn his head to you as his face softened. He pulled you into a full hug.
“This isn’t your fault. None of it is, it’s all their fault,” he spat with disgust. “How’d they even get your nudes? Did you send them to anyone?”
You leaned your head against his shoulder, “that’s the thing, Wil. I’ve never taken nudes before. They took them through my window. I deserve it.”
You felt him freeze up and heard Techno pause his pacing to stomp over to you. He tore Wilbur’s arms off from you and held you out at arms length by your shoulders. He looked the most angry than you’ve ever seen him with his furious eyes burning into your own and his mouth set in a firm frown. It was terrifying to see him that angry.
“(Y/n), you don’t deserve a single fucking thing that’s happened to you. You were manipulated and gaslit by a group of self righteous assholes. You. Do. Not. Deserve. Anything. That. Happened. To. You. Do you understand me?” 
Despite your fears of him, you were determined to protect your friends. “But I do deserve it though. I was a bad friend to them. I tried so hard, but I couldn’t be a good friend to them when they were always helping me. I’m just not a good person in general. I deserve it for not being normal.”
“(Y/n)-”
“Technoblade, that’s enough.” Wilbur cut him off with a firm tone, putting a comforting hand on your arm.
“No it isn’t Wilbur. It’s not enough until she realizes how fucking toxic they are. What they’re doing is gaslighting. You’re in a psychology class, you should know what that is. Give me the definition of it. Now.”
“It’s when someone manipulates another person for their own personal gain… I’d know if I’m being gaslit, and I’m not. They’re just telling me the truth, they keep me in check. I could put more effort into my appearance and personality. I could stand to lose a couple of pounds.” “How do you not- ya know what? Listen. Just listen. That’s the definition of being gaslit. They’re constantly putting you down and making you self conscious about every. Little. Thing because they need to put someone down to fuel their own damaged egos and they laugh at you when you show that you’re hurt by their comments. That’s not a healthy friendship, (y/n). It’s toxic. 
“Real friends would never, and I mean never, do that to you. Real friends would never tell you that you looked like shit when you’re as beautiful as Aphrodite. Real friends would never out you to the entire school when you weren’t ready. Real friends would never tell you to lose weight because they wouldn’t care about what you look like. Real friends care about your well being and they look out for you. They love you for you.”
You fell silent as you contemplated his words. Were they really that toxic? You were planning on being a psychology major in college, so why didn’t you notice that they were actually always against you? You learned in your class that manipulative people are naturally cunning and sneaky, but you couldn’t help but feel stupid. You thought that they were helping you when they were clearly toxic. It was right under your nose and you didn’t even see the signs. What kind of psychology student were you if you couldn’t recognize the obvious signs of manipulation? 
On one hand, you were filled with betrayal. But on the other hand, you felt molten hot anger overwhelm and swirl around your entire body like a cyclone absolutely decimating everything in its path with its violent winds hurling in a blind rage anything and everything without a care of the outcome. You felt the burning hatred of a thousand suns rise up from deep within your being, filling you with a hatred that you didn’t know you were capable of. 
They fucked up your entire life, not you. They were the ones with the ugly personalities, not you. They were the ones that needed to improve themselves, not you. They were bad friends, not you. They laughed at the pain they brought upon you purposefully. They completely humiliated you. They betrayed your trust. They took pictures of you without your consent. They fucked up your relationship with Haley. They violated Haley. They fucking stole her dignity from her with those disgusting pictures they took of her. They were truly vile creatures undeserving of any mercy. Not that you were actually considering being merciful, that would be too good for them. They deserved everything you were going to throw at them. You were going to rise like a phoenix from the ashes of your past self. 
You felt yourself practically vibrate with fury as you held Technoblade’s intense gaze with one of your own. “Those bastards fucking used me for years. Literal years and I thought they were there for me,” you gave a sardonic laugh, your voice shaking with anger. “I-I’m gonna fuckin kill them the next time I see their sorry asses. Make them feel what it’s like to get tossed out of a car. Make them feel what it’s like to constantly get beaten down.”
Techno’s hands gripped your shoulders in a vice grip as his eyes sparked with a crazed delight and he grinned widely at you, “that’s the spirit! You’re gonna rain hellfire upon them, beat their asses (y/n)! Fuck em up! FUCK! EM! UP!”
Wilbur, always thinking about potential consequences and the voice of reason, spoke up with hesitance. “As much as I love that you’re finally realizing that they’re toxic as hell and want revenge, you’d have to wait at least until tomorrow. If you did it today, you wouldn’t be allowed to go to finals. Besides, I don’t think that you should even fight them. You would be out- wait. They’re the ones that opened the car door and fucked up your back?” Seeing you nod, his face darkened in anger. “...(Y/n), you’re gonna fuck em up as soon as you can tomorrow. We’ll back you up if they try to gang up on you, we aren’t eighteen yet, so it’s still legal. ”
“YES, SUCCUMB TO THE ANARCHY! WE’RE GONNA FUCK EM UP!”
“YOU ARE NOT FUCKING ANYONE UP ANYTIME SOON, TECHNOBLADE.” Philza’s voice boomed from behind the closed door. Said door swung open to reveal your father’s angry form and your uncle’s intrigued, slightly proud form.
You three stared at the two for a while with gaping mouths, your previous intensity substantially diminuendos into a quiet shock. No one fucks with an angry Dadza. Techno was the quickest to get over the shock. “...How long were you standing there?”
Your father sneered. “Well, long enough to hear that you three are going to fight someone! Why the hell would you do that?” 
Your brothers looked at you in a silent question. Shaking your head, you answered in a small voice, “there’s just some people messing with me at school. They were just worried about me. We weren’t gonna actually fight someone, they were just talking about how it’d be nice to get some revenge for me. I was just about to tell them that I could handle myself and we didn’t need to fight.”
Immediately, your dad’s stiff stance relaxed slightly as his eyes pierced into your own, searching them to see if you’re lying to him or not. You felt a cold sweat drip down the back of your head at the intensity of his gaze, you hated when he did that. It always made you feel like he was staring right at your soul. Eventually, his gaze softened.
“Why didn’t you tell me? I could’ve helped you through it.”
“I didn’t want to bother you. Plus, it’s nothing I can’t handle by myself.”
“But you looked really panicked earlier hun. Are you sure you can-”
“I just forgot about my stats homework until this morning and I thought I wouldn’t be able to get it done in time, but I did! No worries,” you spoke a little faster than usual. You prayed that he wouldn’t see through your lie. 
“...Alright. Just let me know if it gets to be too much for you and I can talk with your principal about it. Now go eat something and get ready, you only have,” he glanced at the clock on the wall, “an hour before you have to be at school. Hurry up or you’re going to be late.”
Your dad turned around and walked down the hallway away from the room. Schlatt, however, loomed in the doorway for a while before he came into the room and closed the door behind him. You three watched him warily as he eyed you and your brothers.
“...Ya know, I approve,” after seeing your confused looks, he chuckled and spoke again. “I approve of you three fuckin em up. I heard part of your conversation, and those snot nosed brats deserve it for what they did to my favorite niece.”
You three stared at him with shock, making him laugh at you. “Close your mouths, you’re gonna catch flies.” He paused for a second before leaning towards you and whispering “now, you didn’t hear it from me, but the key to a good punch is following through with it. Don’t hesitate. Don’t tuck your thumb in, that’ll break it. Make sure you center your hit on your index and middle fingers, they are the strongest points of the hand. If you need to, go for the eyes, nose, and groin.”
“I-thank you Uncle Schlatt. I really appreciate it. Just- please don’t tell dad?”
“Of course not! I mean, if you don’t fuck em up enough I will. (Y/n), when you’re done, I want details.”
You saluted sarcastically, “yessir, will do!”
He gave a boisterous laugh, “you better. Now go get ready.” 
As he was about to walk out of the room, he suddenly paused and his hand shot to his pants pocket. He pulled something out before putting it into your hand and turning again to walk out of the room. “This is from Tubbo and Tommy. They were worried about you.” In your hand laid three of your favorite candies. You felt your heart swell at their innocent, caring natures. They were honestly some of the sweetest kids you’ve ever met. 
“Well boys, you get first pics!” You held out the candy to them.
Wilbur looked at you with knitted eyebrows, “but they gave those to you.”
“I wouldn’t have gotten through that panic attack without you guys helping me, so take this as a temporary thank you.” You watched as they glanced at each other before reaching out to grab a piece of candy.
“Alright, I’m gonna go get ready, you guys can take the bathroom before me. Love you guys!”
You went into your room and made sure your curtains were closed before turning to your closet. Humming in thought, you picked out a white button up and the nicest sweater you owned. You put on the collared button up then slipped the sweater on over it so that the collar poked out of the neck. You smiled at yourself in the mirror, feeling more confident in yourself than you’ve felt since you started hanging out with them. Fuck them, they always lied to you. You looked great in anything you put on. You felt elated and basked in the spectacular feeling of being able to like what you wore. 
While you waited for your brothers to leave the bathroom, you pulled out your phone and scrolled through your contacts before you stopped on one: Haley’s. The girl that stole your heart and relentlessly stomped on it until it was a red puddle at her feet. Despite the pain, you still loved her. She was your everything. Your thumb hovered over her icon, contemplating on texting her. You had to tell her that she didn’t have to worry about her pictures anymore. 
(Y/n)
Haley
I know you don’t want to talk to me, but I have good news
You don’t have to worry about your pics anymore
I took care of it.
You don’t have to reply to this
Just know that I took care of it and you don’t have to worry about it anymore.
You sat on your bed staring at your phone screen waiting for her to open your messages. You stared at the ‘delivered’ icon at the bottom of your message, waiting for it to say ‘read’. You stared for about ten minutes before you gave up, putting your phone in your pocket and standing up with a sigh. She would see it eventually. Just as you reached your door, you felt a vibration in your pocket. You whipped out your phone and smiled at Haley’s face on your screen. She was calling you. 
Taking a deep breath to calm yourself down, you clicked the answer button, “hey Hales.”
“(Y/n), what’d you do?”
“I took care of it. That’s all you have to know.”
“I think I should know more. What’d you do?”
You paused for a moment before you hesitantly said, “I asked them to delete your pictures and they have to, it’s part of our deal.”
“...You found out who they were?”
“Yeah, but that’s not important. You don’t have to worry about it.”
“(Y/n), don’t tell me what to worry about. Who are they?”
“...Fine, it was Adrian Schnieder, Annie Lockhart, and Sammy McConnor. Ya know, you’re scary when you’re mad Hales. Remind me not to get on your bad side again.”
“It was them? You hang out around them all the time, I thought you were good friends. Why would they do that?”
Even though she couldn’t see you, you shrugged. “I dunno. I think they were just jealous. They’re assholes and I can’t believe I haven’t noticed it a lot sooner. I’m sorry they put you through that, you didn’t deserve what they did to you.”
“God (y/n),” she sighed out, you imagined that she was running a hand through her hair. “I can’t imagine how much that hurt you. You four were really close.”
“I know, but it was a long time coming. Like I said, I should’ve noticed that it was them. They’ve always been toxic as hell.”
“How’d you find out? What happened?”
“Did you hear about what they did to me yesterday?”
“Should I? If you’re not comfortable talking about it, that’s totally okay. You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t wanna.”
“No, it’s fine. You’re gonna hear about it eventually, shit spreads like wildfire at Klinkver. Long story short, they outed me to the entire school and thought that I was only friends with them to get in their pants. They basically told me to kill myself,” you added nonchalantly. “But that’s not the important part about this. They told me that they were the people that took those pictures of you.”
“...(Y/n), how could you say that’s not important! They fucked up your life and all you care about is my pictures? What’d they say they’d do with yours?”
“I asked them to not leak them until after the match tonight so you could have the spotlight. You deserve it after all the hard work you’ve put in to get team captain. Zuri was hard to beat and you deserve the recognition for that.”
You heard her take a deep breath through her nose, “(y/n), for once in your life care about yourself over others. You’re gonna be exposed to the entire school and it bothers me that you’re being so nonchalant about that.”
“They’ve put me through worse. Besides,” you wove a hand in the air, “it’ll all blow over sooner or later when another person gets their nudes leaked. You remember how fast people forgot about Marlene’s nudes when May’s got leaked like a week later.”
“Still, it’s degrading to have people see you like that. No matter how fast they get over it, it doesn’t change the fact that they’ve seen you. You can’t come back from that sweetheart.”
You felt your heart skip a beat at the nickname. Even if she called almost everybody that, you felt special. “I don’t care if people see my boobs, it wasn’t even a clear picture anyways. It was hella blurry.”
Your door swung open for the second time today. There stood Tommy, his eyes peering innocently at you. “Dad wanted me to tell you to hurry up.”
You smiled at him, “thank you buddy. Let him know I’ll be down in a minute. Oh, and thank you for the candy, it really made me happy.”
He beamed brightly before he sprinted down the stairs. “Was that Tommy? Is he gonna be at the match tonight?”
“Of course, he and Tubbo are our team’s mascots after all. They would never miss a game, especially our final match.”
“I can’t wait to see them, but we need to talk about this. It’s more serious than you paint it as. How are you not pissed at those dumbasses? You trusted them and they betrayed you.”
“Oh, believe me I’m furious. Heh, I’m actually kinda shaking right now because of how pissed I am. But for now, I’m just gonna imagine their faces on the ball so I can keep my mind off them until tomorrow.”
“...Please don’t tell me you’re gonna do something stupid tomorrow.”
“I wouldn’t call it stupid per se, they deserve it for what they put you through. It’s more getting justice than being stupid.”
“(Y/n), I swear to god if you start a fight just to get back at them for me, I’m gonna slap you. Think about yourself every once and a while, they put you through so much. If you feel comfortable, you’re gonna tell me everything they did to you tonight on the bus coming home.”
“So we’re gonna sit together?” You tried and failed to stomp the hopeful tone from your voice.
Her laugh sounded angelic in your ear, “of course we are silly, you’re my best friend. I gotta go, my dad’s calling me. I’ll talk to you later!”
“See ya!” When you hung up, you danced around your room with joy. You- no, they- didn’t ruin your friendship with Haley after all! Oh, you felt like your heart was going to burst out of your chest with joy. Even if she didn’t like you like you adored her, you still cherished your friendship. Looking back, Haley and the team always had your back, they genuinely cared about you. They were perhaps the only ones you would fully trust in the future. 
“(Y/N), HURRY UP YOU’RE GONNA BE LATE!” Tommy’s voice outside your door shook you from your happy dance. “Coming!”
You ran to the bathroom and hastily went through your routine. Despite your rushing, you tried your best to look presentable. You were going to prove those snakes wrong, you were beautiful no matter what you wore or how you looked.
After running down the stairs with your bag, your dad stopped you before you could run out the door with your keys. “You look nice today hun.”
“Thanks Dad, I just wanted to dress up a bit for finals today. I’m honestly really pumped to play tonight.”
“That’s good,” he smiled at you before pulling you into a quick hug. “Just take it easy today, you need to save your energy for the match tonight... Listen, I don’t know what happened to you this morning and I don’t know exactly what’s going on in your life right now, but just know that I’m always gonna be here for you. Whether you need help with homework, advice, or if you want me to beat up someone else’s dad for you,” he chuckled, “I’ll do it.” 
You closed your eyes and leaned into his touch, happy with the contact. You two stood in the hall for a moment before he pulled away and told you to leave for school. 
The drive to the school was uneventful with your brothers mainly holding up the conversation. As you pulled into the parking lot, you realized that you needed to catch up on two full days of stats homework.
“Hey Tech?” He hummed, looking over to you.
“Sorry, but would I be able to maybe copy your stats notes from Tuesday?”
“Yeah, I’ll give em to you so you can copy it before school starts. We’d have to go to Mr. Mullins for yesterday’s notes though. We can just ask him about it before school starts.”
As you pulled into a space and moved to leave the car, a hand stopped you. “(Y/n), if any of those two-faced bitches bother you at all, let us know. Don’t deal with this on your own, we’re here for you,” Wilbur said genuinely.
“Yeah, if they say anything bad about you, it’s on sight.”
You laughed, “thanks guys, I’ll let you guys know if they do anything. We gotta get going though if Tech and I wanna get those notes done.”
In the school, you and Techno successfully got your notes done before the first bell rang. The rest of class went by without a hitch with you actually somewhat understanding mostly everything being taught. You even got a question right when you were called on! Turns out not feeling weighed down by toxic people helps a lot with concentration.
The only block you were dreading was the second block. You were sure that if you even glanced at Annie and Adrian, you’d go apeshit on them. Luckily for them, they didn’t show up to class today. They were probably comforting Annie after you “manipulated” her, you thought with an eye roll. Today was just another work day, so you pulled out your laptop and opened Google Docs. You saw Annie’s and Adrian’s unfinished and you were slapped in the face with inspiration. 
They were still expecting you to finish their essays, so you were gonna finish them alright. You were going to completely rewrite their essays all about how they were terrible homophobes and how LGBT+ people are always facing some form of discrimination amongst their peers, complete with attached screenshots of them calling you slurs over text. You’d even write a little note at the beginning that would tell your teacher that they didn’t write this, but they made you write it so you deserved the credit for it. You didn’t care that this would take a while, the satisfaction that you would get would be worth it. This was going to completely screw up their grades, this essay was worth twenty five percent of your overall grade. Mr. Todd was really laid back, so he only had a few rules in the classroom. First was to respect your classmate’s time and work, second was to clean up after yourselves, and third (“the most important one” he said on the first day of school) was that he would never tolerate racism, sexism, transphobia, or homophobia in his classroom. Your masterpieces you were writing would definitely earn them a failing grade, a good scolding from Mr. Todd, and maybe a visit to the principal’s office. This would be first in a long line of gifts you have in mind for them. 
At lunch, you were slightly stumped as to where you should sit. You didn’t really know anybody in your lunch period, so you just sat at the empty table Adrian, Annie, and Sammy left for you today and ate while working on your masterpieces. Finding sources was extremely easy for you, you remembered doing extensive research about discrimination when you first found out that you weren’t the straight girl you thought you were. Luckily for you, you still had the old Google Doc full of sources you wanted to save for later. Thank you, freshman you. 
Third and fourth block went by relatively quickly, you completely finished the work in both classes with plenty of time left for you to continue typing up the essays. You had gotten Adrian’s completely done and Annie’s thesis written. Oh, revenge is sweet. You weren’t even done with what you had in store for them. 
You had their parent’s phone numbers and you got Adrian’s boss’ number from Marlene, who worked with him as a waitress. Annie’s parents were total sweethearts that would be absolutely fuming if you showed them what she said to you. You weren’t sure about Adrian’s or Sammy’s parents, but you were going to send them screenshots anyways. If Adrian’s parents were as bigoted as he was, you still had his boss to fall back on. You could email the screenshots to the principal and the athletic director so that you could have something to rely on if Sammy’s parents had the same beliefs as she did. She valued cross country more than everything, so you could fuck that up for her. Revenge never tasted so sweet to you before, it felt like you were high with how giddy you were. Techno and Wilbur were going to love this. 
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hockeyboysiguess · 4 years ago
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three french horns -> three goal horns | n. mackinnon
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a/n: and like clockwork, here is fic number three in my 12 days of christmas series! i wrote this one a while ago and i hurt myself re-reading it to proof it, so i hope you all like it! rest of the christmas series linked here.
word count:  4,037
warnings: alcohol, drinking 
“Hey, Nate?” you called out from the living room when you heard the back door open, signaling his reappearance in the house after letting the dogs outside. 
“Yeah, baby?” he asked as he stomped his boots on the mat, shaking the last bit of the early Denver snow off. 
You asked the question you’d been asking him since two weeks after his birthday, the same question you’d been asking a variation of for the three months before his birthday. “Nate, what do you want for Christmas?” 
The sound that left Nate’s mouth was barely human, a groan coming from deep within, from the place that never knew what he wanted for any major gift giving holiday of any kind. You tried to be original, get sentimental things, but it was hard to buy for someone who could literally buy anything they ever wanted. Nate didn’t have big, expensive wishes, so if he wanted something, he often just bought it on the spot and you were none-the-wiser until it showed up at his house. This penchant, this bad habit, carried throughout the holiday season; it was a perpetual state of being for Nathan MacKinnon. This meant that items Nate ordered for himself were as likely to show up December 24th as any other day of the year, which was eternally infuriating as a person in his life trying to buy him gifts on the semi-regular basis. 
“I don’t know,” he answered you, like he did every other time. “I’ll like it because it’s from you.” 
That response was sweet the first, second, and half-sweet the third time he’d used it on you. Now, that response was worn out like an old pair of jeans, with holes in the thighs and the knees hanging together by a thread, absolutely unusable at this point in time really. Yet Nate continued to say it, like that string of seven words didn’t light a fire in your stomach completely unlike the kind crackling under the stockings on the mantle right now. 
“Nate,” you groaned, all too similarly to how he had when you asked your question. Spend enough time with a person and you pick up their habits. You and Nate were a completely unoriginal example of that. “You know I hate when you say that.” 
Nate rolled his eyes and shrugged, “Well, I don’t really know. A hat trick? But you can’t get me that, I’ve got to get that for me.” 
The infamous illusive hat trick. While it wasn’t those dreaded seven words, you were pretty sure you had heard about this hat trick that was alluding him every other day at this point. In all fairness to Nate, the amount of times he had scored twice in the first two periods of a game this season and been held off the scoreboard in the second was absurd. Commentators were joking about it, his teammates were chirping him over not one, not two, but three missed empty netters that would’ve sealed it, even though Nate liked to say those didn’t really count as hat tricks. Greater than all of that, Nate was starting to incredibly frustrated with himself and his performances. You knew Nate was a competitive guy before you even went on your first date with him, but his competitiveness ran deep and honestly you weren’t sure your relationship would work if you were even an ounce more competitive than you were. Nate had to win, he had to achieve his goals. This goal was quite simply just three goals, but it continued to be just out of reach this season and coming up on the holiday season, pushing the halfway mark, Nate was starting to think it might not happen this year. 
“You’ll get one, Nate,” you sighed. “You’re so close and you’re too good not to get whatever you put your mind to.” 
“I got a good feeling about the game tomorrow,” he replied, sliding up next to you on the couch to throw a Christmas sweater-covered arm around your shoulders. “My good luck charm is going to be there, right?” 
Nate wasn’t superstitious in the slightest, but he said he always scored more whenever you came. Statistically, a complete lie, but it made you feel special all the same. He kissed your temple softly as he relaxed into the couch cushions next to you. 
“So, what are we watching? Classic or trashy Christmas?” 
That question itself somehow encapsulated every single reason you loved Nathan MacKinnon, despite his pension for buying his own Christmas presents, his overly competitive nature, and the difficulty that came with trying to buy him a present. Nate didn’t love Christmas movies; he wasn’t a hater like some people you’d dated before, but you adored them, both classic and trashy alike. Nate jumped on board with whatever you liked, no questions asked. He always said you didn’t sign up to date all of his teammates that walked through the door scrounging for homemade food or the long hours alone, the least he could do was be as supportive of the things you liked as you were about hockey for him. Nate’s support came in casual, steady waves of constantly and consistently showing up, no matter how tired he was, no matter how long the day before had been. He might fall asleep twenty minutes into the movie, but Nate was here and active and present for as long as he could stay awake. He’d cross deserts and move mountains for an hour with you, and some days that’s what it took, but Nate showed up and jumped on board, which made him the easiest person in the world to love in spite of everything else. It made him the only person you wanted to spend this Christmas and every other one in the future with.
The next day, with his last name on your back and a Santa hat on your head, you found yourself in a position that felt all too familiar this season. You were watching the ice with eager eyes among the other wives and girlfriends. Your breath caught in your throat halfway through the first when you saw two seconds after him that there was nothing between Nate and the net but open ice and a goaltender. You slowly stood up, leaning forward as if those all important inches would help you see the ice better. You didn’t miss the puck sailing over the blocker’s side of the goaltender, or the eruption of cheers from everyone around you as the goal horn rang out, hopefully the first of three for Nate this evening. Mel hugged you, as if you had anything to do with Nate scoring. You adjusted your hat, pulling at the fluffy white edge until it sat a little less haphazardly on your head as you cheered. 
“Two more, right?” Mel waggled her eyebrows at you and you rolled your eyes. 
“For my sake, I hope so,” you laughed. 
Going into Christmas break without this elusive hat trick meant the next four days would be spent with Nate’s mind half at the rink, trying to scheme and plan and game his way into a hat trick, as if the part he was missing was anything other than luck. Maybe he didn’t need regular luck though, maybe just a little bit of Christmas would do the trick tonight. Your third beer in, a vain attempt to calm your nerves with alcohol, and five minutes into the second, on the power play, you watched as Nate easily sailed in his second goal of the game from the high slot, causing the ever familiar cheers and the ringing of the Avalanche goal horn to sound out across the arena. 
Two down, and hopefully one to go. 
“Hatty watch,” one of the other girls sang out from behind you, giving your shoulders a squeeze. 
You let out a loud, long breath, causing a wave of laughter to ripple across the other women around you. Mel teased you about it; they all did. Nate’s quest was well known among the group, something they were equally supportive and teasing about. 
“He’ll get one,” Mel assured you with a comforting pat to your leg. “He’s too good not to.”
You really thought he had it. You watched as Mikko and Nate peeled off from the defenders caught on an odd change, leading to a two-on-one with a lone opposing forward doing his best, but poor, impersonation of a defensemen. Mikko passed the puck to Nate, which Nate passed back easily and set himself up for the perfect slap shot on the return. The quick passing had sent the other team’s player sprawling over the ice. It was just Nate and the goaltender, who was frantically shifting his eyes from Mikko to Nate, tilting back and forth on the ice. Mikko’s pass was perfect, right on the middle of Nate’s tape and Nate was ready for the pass. It was tracking high glove side, exactly where Nate wanted it to go, right into the back of the net. The goalie was facing Mikko, two key seconds behind the actual action. Except out of nowhere, the Grinch stole Christmas and Nate’s hat trick when the goalie’s glove suddenly appeared in the path the puck was taking and wrapped around the puck, just on the wrong side of the goal line for Nate. 
The referee blew the whistle and signaled no goal. Nate’s hands dropped down, stick hanging low. His head tilted up toward the ceiling of the arena and you could practically hear the groan rise from deep in his chest. It was absolute robbery at its finest and the entire arena knew luck wasn’t on Nate’s side that night. You slumped down into your seat, preparing yourself for yet another two goal game and a frustrated Nate waiting for you in the tunnel when it was over. There were another twenty minutes left in the game, but if the first half of the season had taught you anything, third periods weren’t where Nate racked up anything other than wins and assists, both of which he loved, but he just wanted a third goal, just once. Mikko and Gabe each having one already this season, all six goals involving Nate as either the primary or secondary assist, didn’t help either. 
“I think you need to pray or something,” Mel told you with a laugh. “Pray to anything and anyone out there at this point.”
You cleared your throat and looked up at the ceiling of the Pepsi arena, “Santa, I know this isn’t how you take requests,” Mel and the girls around you were already laughing, “but please, pretty freaking please, can we just get some Christmas miracle magic vibes in here? It’s all he wants for Christmas. Please and thank you and I hope you have a Merry Christmas.” 
“Are you supposed to say amen if you pray to Santa?” someone behind you asked. 
“Look I’m not opposed to it,” you sighed. “It just didn’t feel like the right ending when I was asking for a Christmas miracle.”
The girls all laughed and you just stared up at the ceiling. Maybe Santa might grant your unorthodox request delivered via an even more unorthodox method. Maybe you should’ve written him a letter and dropped it into one of those charity red mailboxes at Macy’s. Maybe Nate just wouldn’t be getting the one thing he wanted for Christmas and there was absolutely nothing you could do about it. You knew he was joking when he asked for a hat trick for Christmas, but joking or not, it was the only thing he even sort of mentioned wanting. If sending out a Christmas wish audibly in the middle of the Pepsi arena was what it took, you were more than happy to do it. 
You grabbed your fourth and fifth beer together during the intermission, knowing full and well that you didn’t want to miss a second of one of Nate’s shifts in case something good happened. If after all of this time, all of this waiting, all of Nate’s back and forth debating, if you missed his hat trick goal because you were grabbing another beer, you would have to guess that higher powers didn’t exist and the hockey gods loved laughing at you and maybe Christmas wasn’t that magical after all. 
The third period was half over when you finished your fourth beer. Your right leg had been bouncing on the concrete since the period started. Nate was getting some good looks, and added another assist to his point tally for the night, but you and everyone knew what he actually wanted tonight. A slashing call with eight minutes to go put the Avalanche back on the power play, and you knew Nate was going to fight to play every bit of those two minutes he could get, which meant you were about to be in for a mentally exhausting two minutes. Mel offered her hand to you, already knowing you would need her to ground you through this. 
The first shot on the power play from Mikko ended up in the opposing goaltender’s glove. Nate lined up for the next face-off and you swore you didn’t breathe as soon as the puck left the referee's hand. Nate swept it back easily to a waiting Gabe. You gripped Mel’s hand hard, grateful you both did this for each other often enough that she didn’t mind. Nate slid up through the low slot and you saw the stars aligning as Gabe sent the puck perfectly in Nate’s direction. Nate was already ready for it when it came, the puck on his stick for less than a second. Your eyes went wide and you felt like you were about to break Mel’s hand as the goaltender shrugged his shoulder up to block Nate’s shot, but he came up short and the puck hit the back of the net. 
You were screaming as you jumped to your feet, arms wrapping tightly around Mel as someone else hugged you from behind, again like you’d done anything other than practically give yourself a heart attack watching it. Nate was surrounded by his teammates on the ice, earning a swift pat on the top of the head from Gabe. A glance up at the Jumbotron showed you the wide, bright smile on his face, filling with relief and absolute joy. Mel grabbed your hat by the pom pom and chucked it down towards the ice, making you laugh and a smile that rivaled Nate’s come across your face.
“Finally,” you breathed out a sigh of relief as the arena calmed itself, calming you with it. 
You plopped back down into your seat, hatless with half a beer and your pride in Nate left to coast you through the next ten minutes. You knew Nate was going to be in a good mood, and you just wanted to get through the next ten minutes of the game to get to him and congratulate him yourself. The score was heavy in favor of the Avs and they weren’t in any danger of losing this game, so you got to drink your beer and let out a long breath you’d been holding since Nate first came home after back to back two goal games in October without a hat trick in sight. 
You were practically bouncing on your heels as you waited in the tunnel for him, fingers fussing with the frayed edge of your denim jacket to get out some of your anxious energy. The second he rounded the corner, a wide, gorgeous smile on his face, you ran toward him. Nate wasn’t the type for large public displays of affection, but satisfaction from your incredibly competitive boyfriend was a hell of an influencer and he opened his arms wide for you. You jumped into him and he stumbled a second before catching you easily, one hand guiding your legs around his waist, the other supporting the back of your thighs. 
“Congratulations,” you mumbled in his ear as he laughed at your openly shared excitement for him. 
“Thanks, baby,” he told you, the smile he was wearing evident in his voice.
“Proud of you always,” you reminded him as you untucked your head from his neck. 
You said it after every single game, win or lose, five points or no points, goal or no goal, you told Nate you were proud of him after every single game. The stats sheet didn’t matter to you. You loved him and you saw the grueling work he put in every single day, every single second he was on the ice. You were proud of him no matter what, and it was one of the thousands of reasons he had come to love you for. Your support, your pride in him and the work he put in never wavered. It was steadfast, something hard to come by in a life as crazy as he lived. You were his rock, his home, and he felt it like the gradual, comforting warmth from sitting by the fire on Christmas Eve, when the world seemed a little more good than it actually was, when you told him you were proud of him. 
Nate smiled as he pressed a soft, quick kiss to your lips before gently guiding your feet back to the ground. He pulled you in tighter, collapsing you into him as he let out a long breath that had been holding his tension for months, caught in the hollows of his chest, finally working its way out into the open air. It had been haunting him, like a ghastly Halloween hangover that dared to last until Christmas. Thankfully, it was December now and Nate felt lighter and freer than he had in months. 
“You got what you wanted for Christmas,” you mumbled into his chest, causing his chest to vibrate with laughter. 
“Guess I sort of did, yeah.” He kissed the top of your head softly. “Ready to go home?” 
“Ready for four days of you and me time?” you teased him a little. 
Despite your teasing, his response was entirely genuine, “Been looking forward to it for weeks now.” 
Your smile in response to his words stuck with you the entire way home. Nate loved you in actions, but sometimes it was nice to hear words from him as well. You kicked off your shoes at the front door, just in the knick of time before the dogs could come and greet you both. 
“Want me to crack a bottle of wine or champagne?” you asked Nate as he dropped his bag by the front door. 
“Champagne,” he told you before dropping a kiss to your temple. “We’re celebrating tonight.” 
You slid into the kitchen, dogs hot on your heels, as you made a beeline for the champagne in the fridge. You’d slid it in before you left for the game on the chance Nate finally got his hat trick tonight. You hadn’t wanted to drink warm champagne if that was the case and now, holding the cold bottle of champagne and two flutes, you knew you had made the right decision betting on your boyfriend tonight. He rounded the corner into the kitchen a few moments later, game day suit still on, jacket and tie lost back in your shared bedroom.
“Glad you got yourself what you wanted for Christmas, Nate,” you smiled teasingly at him as you started to fuss with the gold foil over the champagne cork. 
“Before you pop that,” he told you, reaching a hand out to place over yours as you worked on the foil covering the cork, “I, um, I have something for you.” 
“Nate, it’s December twenty-third,” you sighed, setting the bottle down on the cool stone counter. “Can’t it wait a couple of days?” 
Nate smiled softly at you, a smile that seemed to mean he knew more than you in this exact moment, “I’ve actually been holding on to this gift for a long time and I think tonight is the perfect night to give it to you. Are you okay if I blow up Christmas a little bit?” 
You sighed again and gave Nate a stern look up and down, but the softness in his blue eyes and the innocence in his lazy smile pulled you in and had you nodding in approval. Your nod caused nerves to dance in Nate’s eyes and his hands to slide into his pockets, fidgeting with their contents. He shifted softly from one foot to the other. His eyes dropped to the floor for a moment to watch his feet move before he slowly lifted his head back up in time with a bounce on his heels. 
“Okay, here we go,” he mumbled softly to himself. 
He cleared his throat before speaking, “I told you I don’t know what I want for Christmas. Hell, I told you that I didn’t know what I wanted for my birthday and that was back in September. The truth is I’ve known what I’ve actually wanted the whole time. The hat trick was nice and all, but it wasn’t really what I wanted.”
“Whatever it is, you could’ve told me,” you chided him a little. 
Your words were met with an anxious smile and more shuffling of his feet across the floor. He shook his head softly and let out a tight breath before continuing. 
“The only thing I want for Christmas is something you can give me, but you can get it for me,” he told you softly, his voice shaking as he spoke, the nerves in his eyes and his feet and his hands tightening and constricting his voice resonating in his chest. 
Nate slowly pulled a hand out of his pocket before purposefully, and painstakingly slowly, dropping down on one knee in front of you. Your hands flew over your mouth on instinct and your eyes clouded over instantly. Nate smiled softly at your reaction, trying desperately not to let what he hoped your actions meant take over and make him too hopeful of your answer to his question to prevent him from asking it. He carefully opened the small black box in his hand to show you your early Christmas present, a beautiful ring nestled among the black velvet inside. 
“For Christmas, I’d like for you to say you’ll be my wife,” he continued slowly and as steadily as he could. “The thing I’m most proud of, of everything I’ve ever done, is being your partner. I love you so much more than I say, but I hope I show it enough that you want to sign up for me forever because it’s just you. It’s just you forever, for every single day, every single holiday, every single moment. I want to spend every single Christmas for the rest of my life with you. So, what do you say? Will you be my wife? Will you make my Christmas wish come true?” 
The cliches hung thick in his words, but the emotions behind them, the sentiment was so true you could feel it in the very core of who you were. Nathan MacKinnon saw you, faults and gifts and everything in between and loved you in the steadiest, most true way you had ever known. In the light of the Christmas tree, in the home you built together, with the life you build together palatable around you, Nate was asking you to build the rest of it together. You didn’t have to think about your answer. 
“Yes, Nate. Yes, I’ll marry you.” 
Nerves gave way to relief which even more quickly gave way to joy on Nate’s face as he slowly slid the ring he’d had tucked in the back drawer for months onto your finger where it belonged. Nate let out a long breath at the sight of it finally on your hand before slowly standing up in front of you, his hands reaching out to cup your face gingerly. 
“Best early Christmas present ever,” you told him with a wide smile on your face. 
He smiled back just as widely and happily as you grinned at him, “Merry Christmas, my future wife.”
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official-weasley · 3 years ago
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Love, William (Bill Weasley x OC) - Chapter 1
Theodora Cork has everything she could wish for in the summer before her seventh year. She has Fred and George – her two best friends. She has a brother that supports her with whatever she wants to do with her life. She is an amazing Chaser for the Gryffindor Quidditch team and she is going to spend the summer at the Burrow.
She also has the biggest crush on the twins' brother Bill but the only thing she has with him is an 8 year age difference. Something that doesn't stop Fred, George, and Charlie from getting endless ideas to bring them together.
A/N: I started this blog to write down all my story ideas for our freckled dragon boy but after two stories I decided to give Bill some love too! I wanted to try a different POV this time, so tell me what you think? I like the first-person POV more but this was fun and a bit challenging to write as well!
Also, this is the first time I didn't really stick with the time frame of events (when it comes to Quidditch and them being at the Burrow during summer). I tend to be a perfectionist when it comes to time and events and I wanted to get out of my comfort bubble a bit and see if I can endure changing things! Also, I felt like writing a really positive story full of fluff so I tried removing as many negative things from that timeline as possible.
I know I tormented our Charlie bean in the last two stories even if he got the happy and alternative ending so the next one about him will be nothing but pure fluff! 💙
I just wanted to see if I can write something about our dear eldest Weasley and because I had a rather emotional month it's sweet and might get you diabetes, so beware and I hope you enjoy it! 💙
WARNINGS: none other than Fred & George shenanigans and some Quidditch
Chapter 1 - George's Sacrifice
“She’s going to do it,” Fred whispered to his brother, lurking behind a corner.
“I told you, she’s perfect for the job,” George whispered back.
“Yeah, but she was protesting for 3 days.” Fred tried to defend himself.
“It’s a new product and we didn’t tell her what exactly it does. Of course, she was protesting.”
“We don’t even know what it does, George.” Fred tried rolling his eyes to keep the chuckle in his throat. They couldn’t risk getting caught.
“You know that she’ll murder us both if this goes wrong.” George didn’t dare to look at his twin. He knew that if they lock eyes they will start laughing.
“What are you two good-for-nothing rats sneaking around my office for?” The twins turned around to follow the voice. Their faces were pale and if they thought the whole situation was funny before, they definitely didn’t think so now.
“Theo, he’s on to us! Run!” They said in unison, trying to avoid eye contact with Filch, whose face was getting redder by the second.
“Done! What are you two shou...” The girl that joined them didn’t finish her sentence. She might’ve needed a second to realize there was one person too many standing in the circle.
“As we said...” Fred mumbled.
“Run!” George shouted, desperately trying to find something in his pocket.
Fred grabbed the girl’s hand before she could properly look at Filch who was now grinding his teeth together in anger. There was a loud crackling noise and when the trio turned around to see if Filch was following them the hallway was getting stuffed with dark grey smoke.
“Do you have the map, Fred?” George panted, his hands on his knees.
Fred, who was trying to see if Filch ran after them, shook his head. “Theodora has it.”
They both looked at her while she searched the inner pockets of her robes.
“Here it is!” She exclaimed.
They stuck their heads together, George sneaking a look around them just to be sure no one was watching. They took out their wands and tapped on the map while saying ‘we solemnly swear we are up to no good’.
The empty piece of parchment revealed the map seconds later.
“Right, where’s the nearest escape passage?” Theodora ran her finger through the map, the twins scanning it with their eyes.
“Around the corner,” Fred whispered.
“But Filch can already be there,” Theodora said, concerned. She pointed her finger at Filch’s name on the map. The footprints were getting closer to them. “Do you still have any smoke pastilles?”
“Just one more.” George’s hand already in his pocket as he was trying to find it, his tongue stuck out in concentration. “Got it!”
“Let’s go.” Fred waved his hand at his two friends after checking if the coast is clear.
The trio tip-toed around the corner, George ready to throw the pastille if needed. Theodora was clutching the map, following Filch’s every move. He was getting closer and it looked like they will meet right where they are supposed to enter the passage.
“He’s going to see us,” Theodora said through her teeth, trying to stop her jaw from shaking.
They did shenanigans like this all the time but Filch rarely got so close to catching them. He only did so 3 times since the twins invited her to tag along to one of their adventures as they called it. Fred and George took the blame each time but the last time they were caught, Snape got in their way and they couldn’t lie to McGonagall that Theodora had nothing to do with it.
She received a Howler from her mother every day for a week after that detention. Mrs. Weasley might be frightening with her screams but nothing compared to the promises what Theodora’s mother will make her do when she returns at the end of the school year.
Never-ending chores, no going out, no using magic even though she’s 17, and no avoiding visiting her grandma who always pinches her cheeks so hard that they hurt for days. And most importantly, no writing or receiving a single letter from her two best friends.
Right when they thought they got away and George was the last one to squeeze through the passage he heard Mrs. Norris meow and when he turned around to see if she was close, he saw Filch’s victorious grin.
“No matter what you do, just run straight to the Gryffindor Tower!” George shouted as another cracking sound filled their ears.
Fred and Theodora had no time to question what George was doing, as they heard Filch’s evil laugh and they started running through the tunnel as fast as their legs allowed them.
They didn’t stop nor turned around until they reached the Fat Lady Portrait, mumbled the password, and jumped through the hole. They ran up the stairs of the boy’s dormitories, ignoring the fact that the whole common room was staring at them. They burst through the door of Fred and George’s room and hid under the covers of Fred’s bed.
They didn’t move for solid five minutes. They barely even breathed, not daring to move a muscle. Once they were sure the coast was clear they came from under the covers and saw Lee Jordan staring at them with an amused look on his face.
Theodora and Fred were so busy making sure that Filch didn’t follow them that they failed to acknowledge Lee’s presence. The latter was sitting on his bed, a piece of parchment in his hands, his eyebrows now raised. The duo knew he was practicing his introduction speech for the Quidditch game tomorrow.
“What’s chasing you two?” He giggled.
“Prank gone wrong,” Fred explained. “Filch came back to his office while Theodora was still inside and he chased us.”
“George sacrificed himself for us so we could get away.” Theodora finished.
“Why didn’t you check the map to see if he was coming?” Lee asked puzzled.
“We forgot that Harry gave it to Theo and when we remembered she was already in his office,” Fred answered.
Fred and George gave the map to Harry Potter in his third year since they had it memorized. However, whenever Theodora was anxious about their plan, they asked Harry for the map back because they knew it made her feel better.
“Do you reckon George got caught?” Theodora was biting the inner side of her cheek.
“Didn’t you hear Filch laughing? Of course, he got caught.” Fred frowned.
This didn’t go according to his plan at all. Ever since he, his brother, and Theodora started to invent their own products together, they deemed Filch to be the perfect test subject. Usually, it was easy to get away but lately, Filch has been guarding his office more and they had less time to execute their plan.
Because they were caught, they won’t be able to see if their little experiment worked. George has learned a few years ago that Filch loves candy and what better gift than U-No-Poo in a box with a nice bow and a card that says You deserve it.
Fred and Theodora were getting more nervous by the minute. What was taking George so long? What was Filch doing to him?
One look at her friend and Theodora wanted to get up and investigate the situation when the door opened and George walked in.
“What happened?” The trio in the room asked in unison.
“I think it’s safe to say I am getting a Howler from mum tomorrow.” George sighed.
“We were hoping you got away,” Theodora said sadly.
“I was too slow with the smoke pastille and he grabbed my hand.” George started to explain. “He dragged me all the way to his office and threatened me to hang me by my feet. Luckily McGonagall saw us and demanded to know what was going on at once. Filch, of course, ratted us all out but because you two weren’t there,” George nodded to Theodora and his twin, “she only gave detention to me. One week in the kitchen.”
“That’s not bad at all!” Theodora clapped.
Detention in the kitchen was a piece of cake. They had to obey the elves and usually wash dishes or scrub the floors. It was better than cleaning toilets, something Fred and George had to do last month for releasing a Dungbomb in front of the Great Hall and it beat polishing trophies with Filch any day. Theodora knew a lot about that because of her cauldron disaster in Snape’s class at the beginning of the year.
In a few minutes, they forgot all about George’s detention and were already making a plan to get revenge on Filch. It was getting late and as usual, Theodora fell asleep, kneeling beside Fred’s bed, her head on the mattress.
Because of how often that happened, as the twins and the girl were mostly in the boys’ dormitory, they made a blanket fortress years ago and whenever she fell asleep in their dorm, they simply let her sleep there. They didn’t get in detention for that yet and they didn’t know what else to do, since the boys weren’t allowed into girl’s dormitories to take her back.
Theodora woke up before everyone else the next morning. She was a bit disoriented – not knowing where she was. When she heard loud snoring she knew she was in the boys’ dorm. She uncovered herself, with a smile on her face, thankful for how good the twins were to her, and sneaked out.
With all the running and still smelling like smoke, she took a shower and changed her clothes before going down for early breakfast.
The twins were her best friends and she wouldn’t trade them for anyone in the world but sometimes, not having any girl friends, took its toll on her. That’s why she snuck to the Great Hall alone to have some peace and quiet whenever she got the chance.
“Are you nervous, Theo?” George sat down next to her, half an hour later.
“It’s Slytherins, I only have adrenaline in my veins.” She grinned.
“We better beat them today, I am craving a party.” Fred sat on her other side.
“Just direct all the bludgers into their direction so us Chasers can score as many goals as possible before Harry gets the Snitch.” Theodora’s grin turned into a mischievous smirk.
“Oh, you can bet we...”
George gulped, unable to finish his sentence as owls started to fly down to the tables, dropping letters and packages on plates and in student’s hands.
“I told you I’ll get a Howler.” George sighed, staring at the red envelope that started to shake the second it turned to him.
“Open it, George. You know it’s only going to get worse.” Fred said.
“She can’t say anything you didn’t hear before.” Theodora bit her lip, putting her hand on George’s back to comfort him.
Nobody can’t deny that the twins were famous for getting Howlers. By now, everybody knew the high-pitched furious voice that belonged to Molly Weasley. However, no matter how many of these they got, they were still nervous every time.
Both knew that their mum wouldn’t come up with a new punishment. It would be a miracle if she did because they were in detention so much that the most creative Ravenclaw would struggle to find a new way of getting them punished.
Mrs. Weasley tried and hoped through the years that her two sons would grow up and that one day before they finish school, she wouldn’t get a letter from their head of house at least for one week. So far, she was only so lucky once in their fourth year and it was only because they came down with the flu.
George grabbed the Howler and quickly opened it. It was like ripping off a bandage— it was better to do it quicker rather than slower.
“GEORGE WEASLEY, I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU GOT YOURSELF IN DETENTION AGAIN! YOU JUST FINISHED WITH ONE AND HERE WE ARE AGAIN! I AM ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED!
I CANNOT BELIEVE PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL ONLY GAVE YOU ONE WEEK WORTH OF DETENTION. THIS IS NOT PUNISHMENT ENOUGH FOR THROWING SOME SMOKE THINGS AT MR. FILCH!
YOU WILL APOLOGIZE TO THAT MAN AND SINCE NOTHING SEEMS TO SUFFICE WITH YOU, I AM TAKING YOUR QUIDDITCH PRIVILEGES AWAY FROM YOU!!!”
Half of the Gryffindor table gasped. They were wrong. She has never done that before.
“She can’t.” Fred banged the table with his fist.
“She probably means for the rest of the year.” Theodora tried staying optimistic.
“This is the last game of the year, Theo.” George buried his face in his hands.
“Indeed.” They all turned around to see Professor McGonagall standing behind them, her face full of disappointment.
“But the game’s today, professor,” Fred whined.
“How are we going to beat Slytherins with one Beater?” George followed his lead.
“There has to be something you can do, professor.” Theodora tried making puppy eyes. “We know how much you want us to win the cup against them.”
“As much as that is true, Miss Cork, I cannot stand between a student and their parent.” The professor furrowed her eyebrows before turning to Fred. “You will have to work for the two of you, Mr. Weasley.”
Before Fred could say anything back she walked away toward the teacher’s table.
“I can’t believe she would do this. Doesn’t she know how important Quidditch is!” George’s face was beginning to match his hair. He got red in the face every time he was mad.
“Well,” Theodora cleared her throat, “you have to give it to her. She finally found a punishment that you didn’t laugh off.”
George glared at his best friend but he knew she was right. There was nothing he could do except to hope that by some miracle Harry gets the Snitch as fast as he possibly can.
The second they got into the Quidditch tent their captain Oliver Wood started shouting at George almost as loudly as Mrs. Weasley’s Howler did.
“This is an outrage! Preposterous! How could you! Why do you always have to do this! Can’t you...just for once...stop pranking that old rat and focus on Quidditch!” George’s eyes were closed for most of the time Oliver was shouting at him – he didn’t want his saliva in his eyes.
He knew he was going to yell. It wasn’t the first time the twins missed practice or didn’t attend the game because of detention. He was disappointed to make Oliver so mad as he didn’t intend this to happen.
“I am sorry, Wood. I didn’t know this will...”
“Get...out...of...my...tent!” Oliver said through his teeth before George could say another word.
George stood up and did as he was told. He didn’t want to stand in the crowd full of Gryffindors who were angry at him so he decided to join his friend Lee at the commentator stand.
The second he came up, he heard his head of house sigh. He knew she was disappointed in him and he can’t recall when was the last time he was so upset about something he did wrong if he was ever this upset.
His team was counting on him, this was the last game of the year — the most important game. The game that could win them the house cup. Now it would be a miracle if they would win.
Madam Hooch’s whistle, the roar from other stands, and the voice coming from the microphone right next to his ear made him shake in his seat.
“And another goal for Gryffindor. Gryffindor’s Chaser Theodora Cork is on fire today!” Lee shouted into the microphone.
George looked at the scoring board. 30 – 20 for Gryffindor. It wasn’t a bad start. Theodora scored 2 out of 3 goals and George was proud. She was the best Chaser on their team.
“Due to an unfortunate event, George Weasley cannot be on the pitch today, leaving the Gryffindor team with only one Beater,” Lee commented as McGonagall, who was sitting right behind George, sighed again.
Theodora snatched the Quaffle from one of the Slytherin’s Chasers, flying as fast as her broom allowed her toward the Slytherin hoops.
“That’s another ten points for Gryffindor! I bet Slytherins are getting mad. This was the second time Cork took the Quaffle right before they scored!” Lee tried being biased but sometimes he needed a bit of a nudge from his head of house as he got too excited when Gryffindors scored a goal.
Despite the result being 70 – 30 for Gryffindor, George didn’t dare to get his hopes up.
“Slytherins’ two beaters started playing dirty. Potter spotted the Snitch and they are determined to knock him off his broom!”
All eyes were on Harry now. He was battling with the Slytherin’s Seeker for the Snitch and the Bludger that the two Beaters of the opposite team kept directing toward him was fast approaching.
“Slytherin scored!” Lee shouted less enthusiastically into the microphone. “70 – 40 for Gryffindor. Come on, Harry! You got this!”
George turned to Lee when he heard McGonagall clear her throat. He giggled when he saw her pursed lips, warning Lee to stay neutral by poking him with her opera glasses.
George turned his attention to his brother to see how he was doing. He was trying to catch up with the Slytherin Beaters and redirect the Bludger to their Seeker. He felt so helpless. If he wasn’t caught by Filch, he would be there next to Fred right now and they would free Harry of the stupid ball.
“And Cork stole the ball from the Slytherins again. They sure do have to grow a pair of eyes! She passed the ball to Angelina Johnson and...and...she scored!” Lee was now so excited that he stood up, almost throwing his microphone in the air.
George couldn’t deny that sitting next to Lee was rather amusing. He always listened to his commentary while on the pitch but seeing all of his reactions up close was something else.
“90 – 60 for Gryffindor now. We are still waiting to see who will win the battle for the Snitch!” Lee gripped the microphone tighter, getting nervous. They have been playing for an hour and a half.
“Potter dodged the Bludger twice now but will he be so lucky the third time?”
George couldn’t take his eyes off Harry. His hands in a fist, rooting for the boy to make them win the game.
“In the name of our house’s founder, this is unbelievable!” Lee roared, now standing up. “Fred Weasley managed to catch up to the Bludger and send it straight to the Slytherin Chaser who was just about to score. Angelina Johnson now has the Quaffle! Will she pass it to Cork or will she go to the hoops on her own?”
Lee was jumping in his seat while George didn’t know in which direction to look. He was watching Angelina flying towards the hoops, Theodora watching her back. He wanted to see how Fred was doing but also find Harry to see how close he was to catching the golden ball.
“And Johnson scores again! 100 to... Wait! Wait!” Lee was jumping up and down, trying to gather the words to express his excitement. “We won! We won! Potter caught the Snitch! Gryffindor wins!!!”
The crowd roared and as Lee let go of the microphone, George hugged him and they started jumping and cheering.
George turned around to see McGonagall trying hard to stay professional, clapping like mad at the surprise victory. Professor Flitwick, on the other hand, didn’t care if everyone saw he was cheering for Gryffindor as he was dancing in his seat, cupping his mouth, shouting Go, Gryffindor!
His brother has done some memorable things but George couldn’t recall ever being prouder of him than he was at that moment.
“Come on, Theo, just one date.” The boy smirked at Theodora who was half laying in one of the armchairs in the Gryffindor common room, trying to study for one of her final exams – Herbology.
“For a millionth time, no, John!” Theodora rolled her eyes. “And stop calling me Theo. Only my friends can call me that.”
“You mean the Weasleys.” John mocked and leaned closer to Theodora.
“Get away from me!” She tried pushing him but he didn’t move.
“Don’t you have someplace other to be, Connorey?” Fred grabbed John’s shoulders and pulled him away from his friend. “Didn’t she reject you like 5 times this week?”
“That has to be a new record!” George appeared next to his brother, smirking.
“And what’s your number?” John looked unamused.
“What? Getting rejected by Theodora?” Fred laughed and sat on one side of the armchair Theodora was sitting in.
“Zero,” George answered and sat on the other side.
They both leaned toward her and gently kissed her cheeks. She giggled, winking at John which only made him madder.
“You should know by now that Theo likes older guys.” George laughed.
Theodora punched him in the shoulder, making him fall off the armchair.
“I’ll wait years for you if needed be,” John said proudly and walked away.
“Thank Godric this is his last year at Hogwarts,” Theodora said with a disgusted expression.
“He just can’t get enough of you rejecting him.” Fred winked at her.
“We have a proposal for you.” George poked his head from the side of the armchair, finally getting up. He leaned on his arms.
“We only have 14 days to go and then we are free for the summer.” Fred copied his movement on the other side.
They were both looking up at Theodora with smug expressions on their faces.
“What are you up to?” She narrowed her eyes at the twins. She knew them well enough to know they were keeping a secret from her.
“We have been friends for how long now, Theo?” George asked.
“Since our second year when you accidentally threw the wrong ingredient into my cauldron instead of that Slytherin’s what his name was...” She rubbed her chin thinking.
“Allevry.” The twins said at the same time.
“Right,” Theodora said slowly. “I got detention in the kitchen and you two felt bad for getting me in trouble so you sneaked inside and helped me clean the dishes.” She giggled.
“And we haven’t looked back since.” Fred sighed dramatically.
“Oh, I have looked back plenty of times to see if Filch or Snape were after us.” Theodora teased.
“Our point being...” George tickled Theodora.
“You haven’t been at the Burrow since that year.” Fred finished his sentence.
“Are you inviting me to visit?” She gasped.
“We are inviting you to spend the summer at our home.” The twins said in unison.
“We have to develop at least 5 products this summer and we can’t do it without you.” George grinned.
“And Bill will be there.” Fred sang, winking at Theodora.
This time, he got pushed off the armchair.
Bill was Theodora’s first crush. After their second year, the twins invited her to spend a weekend at the Burrow. Their eldest brother came to visit as he got a few days off from work. The second Theodora saw him she was intrigued.
Back then, she was determined to be a Curse Breaker when finishing school and she loved the fact that Bill answered her every question. He spent most of that weekend talking about his job with her and by the looks of it he didn’t mind at all.
Of course, with the 8-year gap between them, she knew he was only being friendly and she was too young back then to even think twice about it but that didn’t stop her from daydreaming about him. As long as it stays in her head, she is doing nobody any harm.
It wasn’t even a day and the twins were on to her. They saw her blush around him and asking Bill questions he already gave her an answer to. They were teasing her up until her fourth year when she went out with a Hufflepuff boy two years above her.
“So?” Theodora tried acting unphased about what they have just told her, desperately hoping they couldn’t see her blush.
She hasn’t seen Bill since that summer but she couldn’t deny that he still popped into her mind here and there, wondering what he is doing and how is he.
“Oh, William will be crushed when he finds out you forgot all about him!”
If Fred wasn’t her friend, she would hex him on the spot for teasing her. Perhaps she should’ve said yes to going out with John, then they would have left her alone.
“It was a silly crush!” She frowned at them. “Forget about it or I will obliviate it out of you!”
“Right...” George giggled.
“Just a silly crush.” Fred followed.
“How come he’s going to be home?” Theodora cleared her throat, trying to act as casual as possible.
“The Weasley Quidditch Tournament is this summer and he’s taking a longer vacation to attend it,” Fred answered.
“Charlie’s coming too!” George said excitedly.
“Charlie’s coming?!” Theodora jumped in her seat.
She hasn’t seen the dragon lover ever since he left school. If it wasn’t for the twins, Charlie would be her favorite Weasley. He was an amazing Quidditch captain — way more chill than Oliver — and even though he was a Prefect he never deducted points from them when they got into trouble.
“Yeah, yeah. We know, he’s your favorite.” George playfully rolled his eyes.
The twins knew Charlie reminded Theodora of her older brother Eric who was an Auror in America. He was just as passionate about his job and they had a similar personality. When the twins introduced her to Charlie, she couldn’t stay away from him because she missed her brother so much that being around Charlie made it bearable.
“If Charlie’s coming, then count me in!”
“Honestly, George, do you feel a bit offended right now?” Fred looked at his twin.
“She will visit because of Charlie and not us.” George scoffed.
Theodora couldn’t stop chuckling. Them being dramatic was her favorite trait of theirs.
“Bill will be heartbroken.”
She stopped the second Fred said that and punched him in the shoulder again. She was ready to defend herself again when her brows came together.
“What did you remember?” George knew that look all too well.
“I can’t come.” Theodora sunk in her chair.
“What?”
“Why?” Fred followed his brother.
“Do you remember the Howlers I got from my mother, about me doing chores all summer?”
“Oh, that!” George swung his hand and nodded to Fred.
Theodora turned her head to Fred who pulled a letter from his back pocket. He gave it to her and she opened it at once.
Dear Fred and George,
I can’t deny that you made some good points in your letter. I appreciate that you took the responsibility for Theodora getting in trouble, however, she won’t get out of this so easily. Whether it was her fault or not, she simply can’t get away with how she was behaving.
I understand that this tournament of yours is very important so I will allow her to stay with you under the condition that she helps your mother around the house whenever needed.
I took the liberty to write to Molly and she assured me that there is plenty of work that is waiting for all three of you once the school is finished.
Keep yourself and my daughter out of trouble, will you?
Miranda Cork
“What in the bloody hell did you write to my mother that she is allowing me to spend the summer with you?” Theodora was staring at the letter with her mouth open.
Molly might be known for shouting at her sons but she was not nearly as strict as her mother. There was nothing in the world that could convince Mrs. Cork to change her mind. Theodora would know, she tried on many occasions over the years.
“It’s the Weasley charm.” Fred winked at her.
She wanted to punch him again but she was too excited to join them at the Burrow to do so. She couldn’t believe it! She didn’t care that she would have to help around the house. She would have her two best friends there to keep her company.
And she will be able to play Quidditch with the other Weasleys and bond with Charlie again. It suddenly seemed that the end of the school year couldn’t come fast enough.
Right, when she deemed the summer to come the best one in years, she felt her heart skipping a beat as Fred’s words came to mind again.
And Bill will be there.
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sylvain-writes · 4 years ago
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Doors Will Open (Donatello x Reader)
Rated: G
Gender Neutral Reader, pre-relationship, movie night, tenderness, cuddling, supportive brothers
You surprise Donnie with lembas bread for your Lord of the Rings movie night.
for @blancoluna
Donatello is holed up in his laboratory of mischief and oddities when you arrive at the lair bearing treats. But Mikey is there to greet you, jumping out of the Pit to graciously unload the deep tupperware of cookies from your hands. 
His eyes twinkle as he leans in to stage whisper, “You’re my favorite, know that?”
April walks up behind him with a gasp of indignation. “I’m gone five minutes!”
“But, but...” He lifts the box in his defense, “Cookies!”
“Ooh.” April’s eyes go wide and warmth floods your cheeks at their enthusiasm. She rubs her hands together with delight. “Can I grab one for the road?” You nod, of course, encouraging her to take as many as she likes. “You’re my favorite too,” she says with a giddy bounce.
Your laughter draws Raphael and Leonardo from the tunnels, and your excitement for the evening mounts. Rising to your toes hopefully, you try to capture a glimpse of Donatello behind them. The tunnel, however, is otherwise empty. Your heart sinks just a little.
Everyone gathers in the kitchen, welcoming you and trying to convince April to stay, but with each passing minute, the absence of your best friend grows harder to ignore. 
“Wheel of Time is in my bag,” you mention to Leo half-heartedly. It’s a book series he’s been begging to borrow for ages. You’re proud of yourself for remembering to bring it, and you don’t want to get distracted and forget. 
“Thanks!” Leo unlatches your messenger bag immediately, diving into a confession that only serves to prove what a nerd he is. Apparently, he sped through the Lord of the Rings this week in his excitement for the weekend movie marathon. You nod along with an amused smile. You're usually overjoyed to have the fellow bookworm to talk to, but your attention keeps drifting to the empty tunnels. 
A lull in his rambling gives you an opportunity to ask, “Is Donnie coming?” You have trouble meeting Leo's eyes, but you try your best to keep the question sounding casual and light. You don’t want Leo, Raph, Mikey, or April to feel like you don’t value their company, but you brought down supplies for Movie Night under the impression Donatello would be joining in; you don’t want to start without him.
“Oh, I’ll get that knucklehead,” Leo says, stacking the books to carry. “He probably just lost track of time.” 
Turning from Mikey's final, futile plea for April to stay, Leo heads toward his room to drop off the books, then to the workshop to gather their missing brother.
The muted sounds of tools and machinery come through the heavy door in clanks and whirrs. But Leo knows Donnie won't mind the intrusion.  He raps a knuckle against the small frosted window and gives his brother a shout. 
Donatello raises his voice over the buzz of a circular saw to ask, “Emergency?” But the sound of the blade cutting through metal continues without pause.
“No.” Leo won’t lie. He won’t test Donnie’s nerves with trickery, not even when the reveal is something his brother has been looking forward to all week. 
“Password?” Donnie counters next.
Leo screws up his face, searching his memories for the right answer. “I don’t know, dude. There’s cookies? And, like, ten hours of movies, so-”
The saw goes silent before the 'shop door opens with a snap. Leo takes a step back to give his brother room. 
Donnie’s face pops through the gap, his eyes looking unnaturally large through the magnifying lenses perched atop his beak. “What day is it?”
“Uh, Friday.”
“Y/N is here?”
Leo's exasperated answer hisses through the tunnel. "Yes." 
Donatello lets the door swing wide as he pulls off his goggles and hangs them on their hook. “Why didn’t you start with that?” he asks as he tidies up his station. His hands fly over the tables, reorganizing the space for his return. He fumbles his wrenches into their case in his rush. "How long have they been here? Why didn't anyone get me sooner?"
Leo doesn’t hide his grin, so happy to see Donnie this close to admitting his crush. “Oh, so they’re the password, huh?”
Donatello’s blush starts at his neck and rises up to his ears. “That’s not…” He gives a little huff as he rolls his tool cart to its place against the wall. “Shut up, Leo.”
Slinging an arm around Donnie's neck, Leo drags him into the hall. He grinds his knuckles over his little brother's head with a light chuckle.  Though Donnie easily squirms free, Leo knocks him with a shoulder, a tease and a mark of support. 
At first, Leo had been reticent to encourage his brother's feelings for you, but over time it's become obvious that Donnie’s affections are far from one-sided. Being what they are, that came as somewhat of a shock to him, but it was the best kind of surprise.
Donnie's lucky to have you in his life. And Leo hopes that one day soon, the two of you will get your acts together. It's about time you two admit just how happy the other makes you.
*
You're picking at the edge of the countertop, stomach in knots, when you hear the echo of footsteps draw near. Leo and Donnie enter the main living space pushing and shoving, but there's not a hint of anger on their squabble. Laughter stretches their smiles wide. 
You bite your lips together, anticipating the moment when Donatello finds you. There's become a shared second of pause when you meet, though you don't know when that began. You try to prepare yourself for it each time, but it always leaves you breathless. 
When Donatello’s eyes fall on you, his laughter peters out and his smile goes soft. Your lungs ache with the breath you've forgotten to release until Donatello breaks the spell. "I was told there would be cookies?"
You gesture to the box, hoping the slight tremor in your hand isn't obvious. "Lembas, actually." It's silly, your newly developed nervousness around him. Donnie is the person with whom you feel safest, most free to be yourself. He's your best friend in the world. 
Your crush on him shouldn't change that. But it does. It could change everything.
Donatello's eyes slide to the box and his jaw drops comically. "Are you kidding me? How did you-? Why did-?" His long strides bring him to the table before he has a chance to form a full sentence.
"It's our weekend," you say. A blush colors your cheeks as you catch your choice of phrase. "I mean, Lord of the Rings weekend. Remember?" You fiddle with the ring hanging from your neck, your fingers running back and forth over the elvish script. 
"I didn't. I do now! I didn't realize it was Friday until Leo… But Lembas!" He's probably the biggest nerd of you all.
"Go ahead." The mess of crumbs on the counter is evidence Raph and Mikey have grabbed their share. Thankfully, they left some for the rest of you. 
Leo skirts around you to take a cookie for himself while Donatello inspects his square of pastry with care. Turning it over in his hands, Donnie hums. "It smells like citrus and almond."
"There's lavender too," you supply gently. It took a few tries and a few tweaks of the recipe you found to get it just right, but you're quite proud of the end result.
"Yeah," he gives a slow nod. "And lavender. I was getting to that." He looks at you in awe. "This is really… it's so cool."
"You didn't even try it." Your racing heart switches gears from nervousness to anticipation for Donnie to have a taste.
"Oh, right." Donatello takes his first bite, follows it quickly with a second, and the cookie is gone. "Wow." Crumbs fall from his lips and you chuckle at his enthusiasm.
"I can make more," you offer as he reaches for another, "if you guys like them so much."
Donnie nods and drops his gaze as he seems to consider it. "...maybe you can make them here," he says finally. "With me, y'know? Show me how it's done."
Your blush returns at the suggestion and you find yourself hesitant to agree to the plan. 
Donatello's eyes blink wide and his almost pout is irresistible as always. You can't fathom why you'd give up the chance to be the one teaching Donatello something for once. 
With a leap of your heart, you give in. "Yeah, of course. We can swing by my place later and grab the stuff. Could be fun."
"Could be," he agrees quietly.
Donnie meets your eyes again and the moment of stillness between you stretches long--
Until Raphael speaks up from the couch with an exaggerated groan. "Can ya please get over here already? There's a whole mess of movies waitin' for us and you're busy yappin'."
Donatello grabs the box of cookies and rummages through the cabinet for Pop-Tarts while you make your way over to the TV. Of course, not even lembas can fill his appetite for sweet pastry. 
In the Pit, the lighting is dim. Title screen music rises and falls, drawing you into the fantasy world of Middle Earth.
Leo has taken a seat atop the back of the couch to give Raph and Mikey room on the cushions below. At the sight of your approach, Mikey scoots toward his brothers to make you a place by the armrest.
It's a comfortable fit, even for your favorite position, sitting with your legs pulled up, criss cross. But when Donnie comes in, there's no real room for him. He doesn't seem to mind. He places the plate of lembas and box of Pop-Tarts on the coffee table. Then, without hesitation, he takes a seat on the floor in front of you.
Mikey starts up the movie and the epilogue scenes cast the room in shadows and flashes of light. Donatello settles in against your legs and everyone's eyes focus on the screen.
The film plays and the temptation to reach toward Donatello increases with his every shift. Though he hasn't complained, you think he must be uncomfortable down on the floor. If nothing else, the way he rolls his shoulders probably means he's feeling stiff. 
It's dark enough, you could lay your hands on his shoulders, work the knots out of his muscles and neck, without attracting the attention of his brothers. But you don't. As you indulge yourself in fantasy, Donatello shifts once more.  He slides into position between your knees and the tails of his bandana catch on the hem of your jeans. 
You stare for a moment, unsure if you're allowed to touch. Then, Donnie leans back and smiles up at you and you could swear your heart stops. It only lasts a second before his eyes return to the screen, but it fills you with comfort, confidence, and calm.
Careful not to tug, you take the tails of his mask in hand and lay the long strips of cloth over your lap. With steady passes, the fabric runs through your fingers. It's soft and worn. Stained and fraying on the ends. The movie plays on, but as far as you're concerned there's only this. 
You twist the tails of Donnie's mask around your fingers. You tie them into loose knots, losing yourself in the quiet intimacy of having Donatello so close. 
Donnie tips his head to the side as you play, turning his body just enough that he can rest his head on your knee. 
You bend at the waist and drop your voice as quiet as it can go to avoid being overheard by the others. "You OK?"
Donatello nods, nuzzling his cheek against your knee just enough for you to notice. "It's nice," he says, and you drag the tails of his bandana through your fingers again. 
As you sit up, you spare a glance at his brothers. Raph and Leo are sitting forward, elbows on their knees, enraptured by Arwen's race on horseback. But Mikey's watching you through the corner of his eye. He gives you a small, knowing smile before turning his attention back to the screen.
When it's time to switch DVDs, everyone agrees it's time for a stretch. 
Donnie's the first one back to the Pit. And he takes it upon himself to lie across all three cushions of the couch with a lazy grin. Mikey doesn't even bother with him, ducking out to meet up with April and leaving his older brothers to fend for spots on the broken recliner and floor.
Donatello makes grabby hands as you return from the kitchen with a pair of sodas. You think he'll sit up, make some room. But to your surprise, Donatello exaggerates his sprawl. He takes the drinks and places them on the floor, then extends his hands toward you again.
You only have a second to register his request before he takes your hand in his and gently pulls you onto the couch with him. 
Cuddled up between the couch and your back, Donatello gives a little shimmy and a wistful sigh. 
Your heart is racing and you're tingling from your hands to your toes, but fitting against the curves of Donatello's bent knees and soft embrace takes no thought at all. And once you're there, you can't imagine ever wanting to leave.
*
The second Fellowship DVD comes to an end, and Donatello's breath tickles your neck, "One more?"
You shrug into the feeling of his words ghosting over your skin. "I'll fall asleep," you admit regretfully. You're so comfortable in his arms, you don't want to go home. But it's precisely that warmth and safety that are making it so hard to stay awake.
"I won't make fun of you if you snore," Donnie teases. There's soft pressure on your scalp and you're sure that's the feeling of him snuggling into your hair.
"I make no promises," Raph chimes in from the recliner. You'd long since forgotten you had company. The sound of his voice should come as a shock, should have you scrambling out of Donnie's arms. But it's only Raph, and he's picking on you the same as always. And there's a kind of approval in that -- the kind you never dreamed of receiving.
You try to shoot him a scowl, but you're grinning because you can't help it. 
*
You were right about having difficulty staying awake. The film isn't on for five minutes before your eyes drift closed.
"Are you asleep?"
"Still listening," you mumble dreamily. Donatello's arms tighten around you and his chin tucks over your head. It's enough to send you adrift into a deep and peaceful sleep.
You wake up in the morning alone but wrapped in a purple knitted blanket you recognize from Donnie's room. You pull it snug around your shoulders as you sit up to check your phone.  There's a text from your roommate and emails that can be ignored, but one notification stands out. You touch the media message from Raphael. 
Though you roll your eyes at the blurry thumbnail, your curiosity has you pressing play. The video is only 20 seconds, anyway. 
It loads immediately and the image clears. You smile at the closeup of Donatello asleep on the couch. The audio is low but you can clearly make out the snuffling rise and fall of his snores. You allow yourself a little laugh as you watch the video play through again. And you don't miss the way Raphael panned to show you and Donnie together dozing comfortably -- your limbs entangled and your face tucked into the crook of his neck.
You're unsure where you two stand and where your relationship will go, but your stomach is full of butterflies and your heart is content.
"Did you sleep OK?" Donnie asks as he comes in from the kitchen. He's brought tea and toast -- a simple but sweet gesture. 
You take a moment to enjoy the sight of him bringing you breakfast 'in bed' and tuck your phone away with a smile. "I slept great."
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mattsboldyy · 3 years ago
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The 24 Days in the Bubble | WJ Canada
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CHAPTER 3 | SELECTION CAMP
-
Summary- Selection Camp begins. Y/N and Kaiden begin getting closer. Y/N also makes some new friends. Selection camp can’t be that bad, right? And final cuts are made. Does Y/N make it onto the final roster?
Requested- No! Idea come from myself :)
Words- 2k
Warnings- mentions of covid, fem!reader, covid testing, cuss words,
Requests- Closed for now :)
Taglist: @2manytabsopen @prettyboyjackhughes @sorokns @ricohenrique @cherrylita @tonyspep @lovereadinghockeyy @only-goalies-allowed @hawksgirl1 @mysoftboybowen @hoespill​ @tysonsjosty @cherrybarzy
Authors note- I got all of my information from google, websites, & from the documentary Team Canada put out based off of the 2021 Tournament therefore, some information that takes place in this series may be false, but just know that I got all my information from the documentary and the internet. Thank you and enjoy!
-
-
-
NOVEMBER 16, 2020
“Hey Y/N!” Kirby said, as you entered the locker room where you, and 46 boys were dressing for the start of selection camp.
”Hey Dacher!” You said, walking over to your stall, putting down your backpack, and pulling out your phone to text your family.
’About to go in for the first day of selection camp! Love you guys!’ Was the text you typed out to the groupchat you had made with your best friends and family before hitting the send button and putting your phone away.
“Alrighty guys, are you already?” Andre said, adjusting his mask.
A mix of “Yeah!” and “Yes!” were thrown around the room.
After getting out on the ice, selection camp in Red Deer began. 
“Hey, you’re doing great out there!” Kaiden said, skating up to you and tapping his stick on your kneepad. 
“Thanks Kaiden! Not to bad yourself!” You said, touching his helmet as he went back to skating and stickhandling.
“Soooo what's that about?” Jamie asked, when you turned toward the other end of the ice, not realizing he was standing there.
“Holy shit Jamie! What are you doing here?” You asked, eyes wide.
“Uhh I’m at selection camp... why wouldn’t I be? But you and Kaiden like each other. Just admit it.” Jamie asked, giggling and wrapping his arm around your shoulder, pulling you into his side.
“What? No!” You said, skating away from him and hearing Jamie laugh so hard you were sure he had tears coming out of his eyes.
Anyways, you couldn’t really decide if it selection camp was easy or not. You couldn’t feel your legs, and it seemed like nobody else could either. Andre and the assistant coaches made all of the players stick handle, timed skates to the far blue line and back, and a few of the players helped the goalies by shooting slap shots at them and acted like you were in a shoot out. 
-
-
NOVEMBER 21, 2020
You were just about to leave your room to go to the locker room for the first intersquad game when you heard your phone ringing. You looked over and saw that Andre was calling you. 
“Hello?” You asked, picking up your backpack from the floor, sitting down on the hotel bed.
“Y/N? We just found out that a non-core staff member tested positive for covid and they had come in contact with assistant coaches, Michael Dyck and Jason Labarbera so they are quarantining. We don’t have to cancel the intersquad games so far, though. Just a heads up and wanted to let you know.” Andre said.
“Oh I hope they’re okay! Thank you for letting me know!” You said.
“Yep, no problem. See you in a few minutes.” Andre said, hanging up.
You put your phone in your back pocket and sighed. This was the type of stuff you would have to deal with.. and really what anyone in the bubble would have to deal with. You put your mask on and opened your hotel room door, and headed to the locker room of the area you and 46 other guys were playing at.
-
“Y/N! Y/N!” Kirby called, passing the puck to you. ‘Shoot the puck. Shoot the puck.’ was all that you were thinking while skating as fast as you can down the ice. You shot it, and it went in, past the goalie that would possibly be on the final roster along with you, and a bunch of other guys. “Yeah!” Kirby said, hugging you and laughing while your other linemates tapped each others helmets. You gave your bench high fives and sat down on the bench as the puck dropped again. “Nice job.” Jamie said, tapping your helmet as you sat down next to him. “Thanks!” You said. 
A few minutes later, when the period ended, you stood up from your seat on the bench when you heard someone calling your name. You turn and see Kaiden.
“Hey Y/N! That was a sick goal!” Kaiden said, smiling down at you.
You laughed. “Thank you Kaiden!” 
“Yeah well I better score one or else I can’t be here with you on the final roster.” Kaiden said, laughing.
“What? What if I’m not on the final roster? Why so sure of yourself, Guhle?” You asked.
“Y/N, you’re an amazing player. Why wouldn’t you be on the final roster?” Kaiden said, looking at you.
“T-thanks. You’re an amazing player too.” You said, heart starting to beat faster.
“Well Jamie is probably going to come looking for us if you don’t go.” Kaiden said, smiling at you.
“Yeah! Stalkerrr vibess!!! Anyways, see ya Kaiden, and good luck!” You said, turning around and fast walking down the tunnel.
‘Why does Kaiden make you feel like this if I only liked him as a friend? I mean he does have a really cute smile, and face, and hair, and... oh my god. Do I have a crush on Kaiden?’ You thought while walking into the dressing room.
-
“You’ve got something on your mind?” Braden asked, while sitting in his stall.
“Not really, just focused on the game.” You said, smiling over at Braden, knowing the words that just came out of your mouth was a complete lie.
“Okay.. but Y/N.. I’m always here to talk if you need me.” Braden said, getting up from his stall and going over to the dressing room door as the 2nd period was just about to start.
Maybe you should talk to Braden. Especially since you didn’t have your mom or best friends to talk to in person. You thought Braden would be a safe space to talk to about things. 
-
-
NOVEMBER 24, 2020
“Y/N?” Andre said through the phone, with his voice sounding a bit stressed and frantic.
“Hey! What’s up?” You ask, putting your stick tape in your bag, getting ready to head down to the locker room for the last intersquad game.
“Two of the players tested positive for covid. We have to post-pone the last game. I just wanted to let you know so you don’t get all of your stuff together for nothing. Have a great day and contact me, Michael, or Mitch if you have any symptoms.” Andre said.
“Oh my god. Okay that you Andre. You stay safe too.” You said before hanging up and immediately texting the group chat with you, Kaiden, Kirby, Braden, Jamie. The people you were closest with during this whole quarantine thing. 
‘guys did you hear about the covid positives?’ You type out, hitting send and immediately seeing speech bubble pop up on your screen.
Kaiden Guhle :)
Yeah. I’m disappointed. That means we’re stuck in this hotel room for 14 days.
Kirby Dach
It sucks. We’ll get through it though.
Jamie Drysdale
Yeah. It sucks a lot. What the hell am I supposed to do in a hotel room that I’m trapped in for 14 days?
Braden Schneider
Guys we will be fine. I hope.
Jamie Drysdale
YOU HOPE?
Kaiden Guhle :) 
Okay guys, calm down. Let’s all facetime, okay?
Me
i’m in.
-
You and the group chat ended up facetiming for two hours. You told your parents about the two covid cases among the players. They were scared you were going to get covid, but you told them about the 14 day hotel room situation and they calmed down. (thankfully)
You had to get used to this. It was part of being “apart of camp.”
-
-
DECEMBER 8, 2020
Some time had pasted and December finally had come. Well, you shouldn’t be that excited about it. It meant cuts and the final cuts to the roster were coming. Kaiden and a bunch of other people were very reassuring when it came to your worries about being cut. 
Coach Andre made an announcement via email stating that the first cuts had been made. The players were, Matthew Robertson, Mason Millman, Xavier Simoneau, Daemon Hunt, and Ridly Greig, leaving you and 41 other players in camp. 
When you read the email, and didn’t see your name, you felt like a weight was lifted off your shoulders... but, you still had 3 more days till the final cuts were made from the roster.
-
-
DECEMBER 10, 2020
That day, seven more players were cut from camp. The players being goalies Brett Brochu and Tristan Lennox, and forwards Adam Beckman, Tyson Foerster, Hendrix Lapierre, Cole Schwindt, and Shane Wright, leaving you and 34 other players in camp.
‘One more day.’ Was what you were telling yourself, trying to ease the anxiety of being cut.
“You aren’t going to get cut, Y/N/N. I know your not.” Kirby reassured you through facetime.
“We’ll see Kirby, we will see.”
-
DECEMBER 11, 2020 (FINAL CUTS TO THE ROSTER)
You heard a knock at your hotel door, quickly getting up from your bed, and tossing on a hoodie. When you opened the door, you saw a few staff members and one seemed to be holding a phone.
“Hey Y/N! We have a few people who want to talk to you!” The staff member said, making you put on a confused face before them handing you the phone. You saw your mom, dad, and brother gathered all around the screen.
“Hey sweetie!” Your mom said.
“Hi guys!” You said, looking down at the phone, seeing a bunch of smiley parents and brother.
“Congratulations, honey! You made it onto the final roster for Team Canada!” Your dad said, your mouth immediately dropping and looking at the camera crew and staff members, wiping tears that came down your face from being so happy.
“Really? I really did it?” You asked, jumping up and down.
“This is not a reaction we’ve gotten before.” One of the staff members mumbled to the other, slightly chuckling. 
After saying goodbye to your mom, dad, brother, and staff members, you went back into your hotel room and immediately check your email, making sure you, Kirby, Kaiden, Jamie, or Braden weren’t cut from the roster as they were the people you were closest to.
“We’ve made the final cuts to the roster. Team Canada is releasing forwards Mavrick Bourque, Graeme Clarke, Gage Goncalves, Seth Jarvis, Samuel Poulin, and Jamieson Rees and defensemen Lukas Cormier, Ryan O’Rourke, and Donovan Sebrango. Thank you.” You mumbled out, not seeing any of your friends names, smiling even wider. You then texted Kaiden to congradulate him. 
Wow, you did it. You really did it.
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Text
Seahorse (Spencer Reid x Trans Male!Reader) NSFW
Summary: Spencer and Y/N have always wanted kids. Here’s the time Spencer was brave enough to broach the subject of how they would go about it. Plus a few more times after that.
AN: @imagining-in-the-margins​ came up with the idea of Spencer’s trans bf having a baby amidst man many many prompts for Spencer x male!reader to indulge my daydreaming and I ran with this prompt. 
Thank you to @writing-in-april​ for being my beta on this one! Couldn’t have done it without you, beebs <3
This is the NSFW version. If you are under the age of 18, please do not read! Here’s a SFW version of the story.
Word Count: 5.7k words 
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Content Warnings: Trans man is pregnant, coming off testosterone, impregnation kink, pre-op sex, allusions to Prison!Spencer.
Masterlist // Gif Credit // SFW Version
The halls echoed with the unbridled joy of little ones calling out “Nemo” and “Dory” at the sight of the clown and surgeon fishes. Spencer bounced on the balls of his feet as he looked around the next room in search of his goal. He stopped when Y/N spared a look in his direction, away from the tank that had captured his attention for a solid five minutes.
“JJ sent me a video of a shrimp solving a Rubik’s Cube the other day.” He grinned.
Ah yes. JJ had also sent Spencer a video of little Henry swinging a mini softball bat about just like Spencer had done. For one game and one game only he had insisted, despite Y/N’s own resolve that he looked hot in the kit.
The walk through the tunnel was the slowest slog Spencer felt, but it was the only attraction in the aquarium to properly distract him. Lights above them filtered through the water, bouncing off the painted walls of the tank in a blue glow. Various species in a perfectly balanced ecosystem swam around one another without a care in the world. A particular stingray flapped its body against the glass, and three children nearby laughed at its funny shaped mouth.
“I used to sit on my mum’s shoulders when we walked through these. Touch the ceiling as if I could pet the fishes.” And Y/N’s hands stretched up over him, his eyes following a shark that slinked overhead, “When I got too old, I’d just press my nose against the glass and stare back.”
Nerves returned at the sight of a circular tank in the centre of the room holding something familiar. Seahorses curled their tails around the plants that waved together like a crowd at a concert. Little babies bobbed about the parents, translucent and wriggly.
Spencer coughed and spoke while Y/N took in the creatures, “Did you know that the seahorse is the only animal where the male carries the children?”
Suddenly his throat was dry; the words he’d been rehearsing dragged to a halt. Y/N turned to face him properly, guiding Spencer to the left as a little girl stood on tiptoe to see the seahorses as he continued to struggle.
“Well, that might not be true actually.” Spencer choked a little on his words, his voice’s volume steadily declining into a soft whisper, “I know that some human men can have babies.”
Y/N’s face clouded with doubt for a moment. Then it clicked and his face cleared, “Spencer, tell me what you’re getting at.”
Spencer twisted his hands around one another, “Have you ever thought about us having kids… biologically?” He watched Y/N’s Adam’s apple dip as he swallowed hard
“You mean like me being pregnant?”
“Yes, have you considered it an option for us?”
The conversations of other aquarium patrons were forgotten as Y/N took his gaze away from Spencer. His eyebrows were low as he considered his words carefully. Y/N always thought about the implications of what he was saying, maybe a little too much. Spencer could be biased though; his impatience did not mix well with his anxieties.
Eventually, Y/N turned back with a brave face and said, “I’d have to think about it some more.”
“Ok.” Spencer nodded, his chin wobbling a little.
There was hope though: he needed to think “some more”. Implying Y/N had thought about this before.
Near the end of their trip, Spencer did find himself in a staring contest with a little seahorse plushie with large eyes and an anatomically inaccurate tongue hanging out. In all honesty, it was kind of ugly.
“Spencer, come on. You know how I get around stuffed animals.”
How empathetic his boyfriend really was, projecting feelings of love onto the inanimate objects then making the excuse that he had to buy it now.
Spencer did have to leave the toy behind though. Out into the sunlight of the parking lot, he winced before he put his sunglasses back on.
“Park?” Y/N offered his hand and smiled. It was an olive branch, something to say that Spencer’s query had not ruined their day out together.
Spencer accepted and squeezed his hand. “Park.”
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
 Standing in front of the bathroom mirror, Y/N had a hand on their lower belly, some space between the fingers as if there was an invisible bump there to accommodate. His head had tilted while he thumbed over the air.
As drowsy as Spencer was from work, his mind was focused without a distraction on what he had seen through the ajar bathroom door. He could barely pay attention to the Doctor Who episode Y/N put on. In fact, he doubted anything could take his attention away from the idea of having a child with-
“What do you think about me being pregnant?”
Spencer’s eyes shot wide open, then they were covered slightly by his inquisitive eyebrows in his attempt find an answer. Especially with Y/N looking on him while he waited for him.
“I think you’d be so beautiful carrying our baby. But if you wouldn’t be comfortable, then I wouldn’t make you. We still have surrogacy, fostering, adoption to consider,” was his answer. Never a lie, but the truth was always softened.
Seemingly satisfied, Y/N looked back at the episode. But Spencer couldn’t wait anymore, forgetting about anything else in the world except for this.
“What do you think, Y/N?” His body leant in towards his boyfriend’s.
Squirming in their spot on the couch, Y/N hummed before he answered, “I froze some of my eggs before I started my transition. I also sold some, for a down payment on a house or my wedding.”
Spencer’s heart thrilled at the possibilities. A house together? Matching suits at their wedding? He almost neglected to think about the fact that pregnancy was suddenly a very viable option for their future.
Regardless of Spencer’s many, many thoughts, Y/N continued, “And I thought that perhaps, if I found the right person, I would like to carry their child.” His palm opened up to him and Spencer instantly took it. “I know you’re the right person, but I’m not sure I want a baby now.”
“Of course,” Spencer lifted Y/N’s hand to his lips, “Whenever we’re both ready.”
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
Spencer pushed the dirty bedsheets into the washing machine; it wasn’t that big a deal. If the blood didn’t come out, then they could always buy a new set. Although they should really be saving money for decorating the nursery.
“Spenceerrrr.”
As the machine rumbled into life, Spencer returned to Y/N, curled up on the sofa with a heat pad to his gut. No amount of warnings from their doctor could have prepared Spencer for how emotionally straining it was to see his boyfriend suffering. Y/N was taking this a lot harder than Spencer – and rightfully so, it was his body that was changing.
“Why did I have to have such strong paternal instincts?” He grumbled with his eyes still closed.
Spencer let out a laugh, but it was cut off quick when Y/N whimpered loudly. He knelt down before him and cupped his face. Y/N’s cheeks were warm; his hands clung to Spencer’s wrists like a lifeline.
“What do you need?” Spencer asked softly and Y/N sighed, keening into his cooler palms.
“Can you tell me I’m handsome please?”
“You are the most handsome man in the world, and I adore you every minute of every day.” Spencer kissed Y/N’s pouting lips gently, “Handsome inside and out, I never wanna think about life without you. You just make everything in my life better.”
His fingers moved to brush away a tear that slipped down Y/N’s face and over the ridge of his nose. But he missed and it dripped onto the pillow.
“You’re doing so much for us, for our baby.”
“It’s not even real yet,” Y/N sniffled. His hands finally released Spencer and pressed the heat pad into him.
“It’s gonna be.” Spencer bumped their noses together, “We’re gonna be dads.”
A hoarse laugh met with a hint of a groan in Y/N’s chest, “Yeah. We’re gonna be dads.” That sound and those words were all Spencer needed to feel better. But he wished the same could be said for Y/N. The only thing he could provide was a promise of future relief:
“How about we order in tonight?”
“Ugh, yes.” Y/N burrowed his face into the pillow.
When their bed was made up properly, Spencer and Y/N cuddled together. Unfortunately, Y/N was restless, trying to find a comfortable position while his painkillers kicked in. Spencer kept his complaints to himself, allowing himself to be shifted around in Y/N’s hunt for relief. Honestly it was the least he could do.
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
“The reproductive process begins when a male and a female seahorse do daily pre-dawn dances, intertwining their tails and swimming together.”
“Well, it’s nearly nine, so definitely past dawn.”
“I’m trying to be romantic, Y/N.”
Y/N adjusted the bed sheets around his middle, “We don’t have tails either and - if I remember correctly - your last sexy swimming encounter ended poorly.”
Spencer flushed at the memory of Lila in the pool; another memory turned the pink to red. Y/N had laughed so hard his gut ached when Spencer told him about how awkward he had been around Lila. This was before the context of the case had been disclosed, promptly removing the space for any more laughter.
“Baby?”
Y/N was touching his face. Spencer’s head emptied itself of all thoughts of Lila. This was not what he wanted to be thinking about right now. Y/N’s laughter maybe, but none of the rest.
Tucking a curl behind his ear, Y/N leant in close, “If I’m ready, and you’re ready, you know what happens.” His eyes wandered down Spencer’s face, “And it’s not swimming together.”
But, just as their lips were about to touch, Y/N jerked away from him. “Wait, I gotta brush my teeth first.”
Spencer moaned with indignation while falling backwards onto the bed as Y/N disappeared from view. A few seconds later, he heard the electric toothbrush buzzing. With a burst of energy, he stripped himself down to his underwear – a petty way to get back at Y/N who had made it very clear that undressing Spencer was one of his favourite parts of their sex life.
When Y/N returned, with the minty freshness he apparently desired more than his own boyfriend, he said “What? You already did this morning?”  His eyes looked down at Spencer’s chest and his lips twitched into a pout. 
Spencer held back his grin, keeping his triumph at retaliation to himself as he said, “I wouldn’t have minded.”
“That’s the biggest lie I’ve ever heard, Spencer.”
And with that, Y/N crawled onto the bed, over Spencer’s body and kissed him silly.
Any remaining thoughts of sleep were dispelled as the men took turns worshipping each other’s bodies. Impatience chased them in their desires, deliciously enticing them to push the pleasure further and faster. While Y/N kissed his neck, Spencer’s thoughts fixated on how perfect his boyfriend felt pressed up next to him. He couldn’t wait anymore, he just had to get inside him.
“Let me put a baby in you, Y/N.”
A whine passed through Y/N’s lips at his words as he adjusted his grasp on Spencer’s body, a hand in his hair to pull him back in.
“Do it.” He whispered into the space between them, “Please.”
As quick as they appeared, the insecurities Spencer and Y/N were holding released. Their moans harmonised when Spencer finally pushed into Y/N. His legs wrapping around his skinny waist, luring him in. Spencer was enraptured by the feeling of his boyfriend’s weight against him. God, he wanted to go slow, appreciate Y/N for all he was worth. But his greed got the better of his intentions, eating up all of Y/N’s encouragements – both the words and the noises snatched from his throat.
When they were both spent, Spencer and Y/N sagged into the mattress, wrapped up in each other and the covers. The burning warmth of their bodies drew up two soporific smiles on their faces.
“You know, a seahorses’ body shape means that they’re inept swimmers, and they can actually die of exhaustion.”
Y/N poked Spencer’s sternum. “Is that your way of makin’ fun of my stamina? Give me a few minutes; I’ll be on you like a rash.”
Grinning at such a prospect, Spence continued, “They also mate for life monogamously.”
He felt two fingers touch his cheek, "Spencer, I love you and your endless fountain of knowledge.” Y/N paused to peck the corner of his lips, “But I’m not actually a seahorse. And, though I do plan to mate with you for life, if you wake me up before the sun is above the horizon for a ‘dance’, I'm gonna suffocate you with my new body pillow.”
“Oh, you got your pillow?”
“It’s en route.” Hence why Y/N was content to use Spencer in lieu of said pillow.
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
When Spencer disclosed to Hotch that he would need some time off because he and Y/N were considering having a kid, first thing on a Monday morning, Hotch didn’t let anything on. There was a hint of a hint of a smile though. His eye wandered to the school photo of Jack he kept on his desk, and he was greeted with the memory that Jack almost shared a name with Emily’s cat.
Naturally, Rossi found out next. Technophobe Spencer Reid had left his computer screen on a website for baby blankets, and Rossi had been the one to pass by first. After turning the monitor off, Rossi took Spencer aside in the break room and spoke about how wonderful it was that he was going to be a father. Then he kissed both his cheeks, leaving with misty eyes and a smile that he wouldn’t explain to Penelope passing by. Spencer blinked then finished making his coffee.
The next conference room meeting – the same day and just for an update on the paperwork deadline - Spencer simply decided to drop the information that he and Y/N were planning on having a kid as if it was his thoughts on their next unsub’s motivations were.
Three seconds of silence later and an uproar exploded.
From then on, the week was filled with pokes and ribbing at his upcoming parenthood. A peek into the future.
After making her a cup of coffee, Spencer sat opposite JJ at her desk and asked for advice. Her response: offering Spencer the opportunity to babysit Henry more. Obviously he accepted; more time with his godson was always a good thing. Then she went into how parenting was just a natural thing that he would know when the time came. Not very reassuring on its own, but with his best friend’s support, Spencer felt a smidgen better.
Penelope admitted that she had saved outfit ideas on Pinterest for Spencer – among other members of the BAU. When Spencer dared to enter her lair, she showed him several. Apparently that wasn’t even a dent in her collection, and she had already placed an order on a little bow tie. Spencer left before she tried to organise a shopping trip; neither Spencer nor Y/N were really fans of retail therapy.
Derek was teasing away, “Spencer and Y/N are gonna be baby daddies.” And every single time, Emily would join in. She liked to claim she was the reason Spencer was having a kid, reminding him of when JJ was pregnant. He had been incredibly weirded out by the baby kicking, but Emily had asked if he had considered having “baby geniuses” and he never gave an answer.
To be fair, Spencer never could have seen this coming. That made it all the better.
Apart from when Derek began supplying a realm of baby names, that varied from “oh that’s actually cute” to “oh my god, why would you even consider that a name for a real child?” Spencer was happy to rank them aloud for him.
The cat was only half out of the bag though.
Now Spencer had always been affectionate when he and Y/N were together. But the second it spilled into their public lifestyle, Y/N knew something was afoot. He was quick to pick up on this when he went to collect Spencer up for a chilled date night and Spencer kissed his cheek in clear view of the entire bullpen.
“You told them, didn’t you?”
“I couldn’t wait, but I do have my paternity leave arranged!”
The team swarmed to deliver their congratulations. And it was then that they revealed that they all thought that Spencer and Y/N were planning to adopt or look for a surrogate. Their embraces didn’t spoil the unexpected second part of their announcement; Y/N looked like he’d simply put on a few pounds rather than gained a baby bump beneath his button-up. Naturally, there was even more of a hubbub than before when they discovered that Y/N was already pregnant.
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
“Spencer, baby, you gotta calm it with the ocean theme.”
“But…” he pouted, holding up the finished mobile. Brightly painted sea creatures and chunks of coral dangled delicately in a circle. Sure enough, there were orange seahorses hovering about their habitat.
“It’s very sweet and I adore you for it,” Y/N kissed Spencer. “Not everything has to be related to seahorses though.”
“I guess not.” Spencer’s defeated tone did not last long. His face brightened and he whipped a blanket adorned with little seahorses and bubbles at the edges out of the cot. “But - this online store was taking commissions, and you always say support small businesses!”
Thank god Y/N had been the one in charge of painting the walls. An underwater mural would have been a step too far.
“You, Doctor Spencer Reid, are so…” Y/N’s hands were up in the air between them, searching for an adjective to describe Spencer appropriately. Then he settled those hands on his shoulders and Y/N kissed him.
When they drew away, Spencer spoke, “I’m so what?”
Y/N shrugged, “Just so.” He kissed him again, lingering longer than before and smiling as Spencer’s hands touched the obtrusive roundness of his belly that pressed into Spencer’s stomach. They were so close to meeting their little bubba.
“So are you.”
“Ok, don’t have a go, I bought this before the ban,” Y/N held out a gift, wrapped in sea-green tissue paper and bearing a blue bow.
Folding the blanket neatly over the bars of the cot, Spencer eagerly yet daintily unwrapped the present. As the tissue paper fell to the carpet, his hands trembled.  Eyes shining, he couldn’t bring himself to look away from the latest scan that was framed by tiny seahorses to thank Y/N.
There was more still, as Y/N explained, “There’s another behind there. I’ve seen the state of the one in your wallet.”
“It got caught at the bottom of the pouch,” Spencer said quietly, unbending the catch on the back of the frame. Sure enough, two of the same photographs spilled into his waiting palm. Truth be told, Spencer had already taped his torn photo together again and it was going to stay in his wallet. This spare would be in the post soon, on its way over to his mother. God, she was so excited to hold a baby again. The photo album would have to do for now.
“Could you maybe recant the ocean ban? Because I saw this and I knew it would really go well with the blanket and the mobile.”
Sighing, Y/N’s head tilted back, “What is it?”
The pretence of annoyance couldn’t be maintained towards Spencer’s face beaming back at him as he held up a wonky looking seahorse plushie. It wasn’t the same one he’d seen before. Some heartfelt child had taken pity on that one and given it a forever home. No, this was a perfect little present for his bubba.
Y/N thought so too as he let a grin settle onto his face.
“Ok, we can keep this one. But no more from now, alright?”
“I suppose. Besides, our baby isn’t our seahorse. You are!”
“You better not buy us a fish tank for my birthday.” A spike of nerves hit Y/N when he couldn’t quite catch Spencer’s eye to confirm his word. “Spencer? Promise me... Spencer!”
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
“How are you feeling, Baby Daddy?” Derek hugged Y/N who was reclined in his bed. His body pillow propped him up for his visitors.
Y/N wrinkled his nose, “For once, I wish I was a real seahorse and I could have just sneezed her out.”
Katia Nikola Reid definitely looked like she’d been sneezed on when she first entered the world, screaming her teaspoon-sized lungs out. Named after a hero of both Y/N and Spencer, one day old, bundled in a blanket, she scowled at Spencer’s dopey face looming over her while Emily held her tight.
A hoard of presents huddled in the corner of Spencer and Y/N’s bedroom. Emily thought it’d be a great idea to bring the baby an Ikea shark that was bigger than the child – and would definitely take up around half of her cot.
“She’s already got him wrapped around her pinky finger.”
“Yes, she does,” Spencer agreed giddily.
Next, Derek took her in his arms, untucking her arms from the blanket swaddle to give her a fist bump. He swayed her about the room while Katia relaxed a little more. The deep humming in his chest soothed the wrinkles on her forehead. Katia stretched as if to touch his face, and her mouth gaped at him.
“Aww, baby genius is ready for a nap.” Derek yawned too, “Who’s gonna micromanage me while I put her down?”
“Me! Me!” Y/N said, his enthusiasm muted by tiredness. Spencer leapt to his side, helping him out of bed, his teammates watching fondly as he did so. Y/N was allowed out the room first, Derek close behind and clicking his tongue at little Katia.
“She’s so sweet,” Emily said, her eyes on the pair’s backs and the dangling loose blanket from under Derek’s left arm. “I’m so happy for you both.” And she hugged Spencer tight; Emily always gave such good hugs. Good thing she was going to be around to give plenty to his daughter.
Then, down the hall, he heard Derek say with sarcastic resignation, “Oh Spencer, I thought Y/N was kidding when he said no more seahorse themed items.
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
Y/N ended up climbing into the bathtub with Katia. Even as she had grown into her chubby features, looking more and more like him and Spencer with each passing day, she was still so small.
Sitting up with her in his lap to help her out, Y/N lowered her into the warm water. His fingers tenderly rubbed the blackcurrant scented soap on her tummy, copying her expression as her tongue poked out between her gums. Her jerking legs rejected the water that Y/N’s hands cupped to rinse the bubbles off.
“Oh!” Y/N said in surprise as Katia sneezed, “Bless you.”
He heard the front door go, but he let Spencer follow the clues to their bathroom. Sure enough, the Doctor soon entered with his jacket shed, already rolling his sleeves up as he dropped onto the bathmat. A hand curled at Y/N’s chin as he kissed him before it stroked over the damp wisps of hair on Katia’s head.
“Hello. Hi.” His voice was that bit more delicate as he caught Katia’s eye and welcomed her big gappy smile.
Y/N tilted his head towards Spencer. “Good first day back?”
“I missed you both.” Spencer swished the water around by Katia’s side, “Isn’t it incredible how she’s experiencing all of this for the first time?”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake.”
Spencer giggled away as the surrounding bathwater yellowed and Katia flapped her arms.
“Mind your language.” He said without any weight to his warning, “Our little girl can’t help it.” Then he stood and prepared her towel, a deep-sea blue that brought out her eyes. “Can I feed her tonight?”
“Of course, baby,” Y/N agreed as he lifted Katia out of the tub, where Spencer caught her and bundled her up with skilled speed. As he dried her off, Katia cooed away to herself. She did get a little pissed off when he dressed her up in a clean nappy and a sleepsuit, but Spencer couldn’t take her crumpled expression seriously without the tears.
The rocking chair had to be one of his best investments for his daughter’s room. It soothed Katia from the darkest of tantrums, a familiarity that swayed her. She fit so perfectly into Spencer’s arms and he fit so contentedly into the seat. Her eyelashes fluttered slowly shut as she drank more milk.
Not quite strong enough to sit up on her own, Katia leant fully into Spencer’s hand while he burped her – thankfully not for long. Then it was off into her cot.
Y/N watched him from the doorway as Spencer stroked the apple of Katia’s cheek while she drifted off into slumber. An effortless smile danced on his lips even as he switched the lamp off and welcomed Y/N over to see their sleeping babe.
“Love seeing you with her, Old Daddy Spencer teaching her everything she’ll need to know.” The kiss that followed was certainly not appropriate for their daughter’s nursery, so he took Y/N by the hand, leading him into the hallway. Even then, between the short pecks that pressed against his lips, Y/N continued to talk, “Is this how you felt while I was pregnant?”
Breath hot against his face, Spencer swallowed hard while Y/N said, “Seeing my handsome boyfriend carrying our child? I think I get it now.”
His hand slipped up Spencer’s shirt. It was crystal clear what his intentions were. Spencer was already close to panting when he pulled Y/N flush against him. With more desperation this time, they fumbled around their home until they made it to their bed. Spencer’s hands aligned with the stretch marks on Y/N’s thighs as he grabbed them and pulled him on top.
He huffed as Y/N’s teeth tugged and released his bottom lip, “We have to be quiet.”
“I can be quiet.” Y/N ripped off his shirt in one smooth movement, “Can you?”
Spencer couldn’t give an answer. Instead he pulled Y/N back against him as they fell onto their sheets.
Their first time in months, it didn’t last very long, but it was exactly what they needed.
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
 The biggest surprise of the evening was that Rossi put down his drink to hold Katia. To be fair though, he had already had a few. Hence why he was singing and dancing around the garden with Katia in his arms. What a sight to behold, it eased the pain of Derek and Hotch’s absence, their own kids to take care of now.
Eventually Rossi relented, allowing Penelope to take Katia, turning to Y/N who had kept a watchful eye on his actions, “Promise me you’ll bring her over when she’s allowed to eat food.”
“I can’t give her your food for her first taste. She’ll be disappointed for the rest of her life,” Y/N joked, Rossi letting out a boisterous laugh that made Katia giggle in turn.
Penelope got to hold Katia next and show her off to Henry who was very intrigued to learn more about his godsister – Spencer told him that was who Katia was and it stuck. Henry became Penelope’s little shadow until they found a seat for him and a cushion for his lap to hold the baby. His joy unbridled at such a responsibility was adorable. He posed for many photos, while Katia for once stayed quiet.
Spencer was tired but the best kind of tired. A night in with friends, watching his boyfriend and his daughter be welcomed as much as he was, it wasn’t a surprise but it was always a delight. And this moment right now, Y/N cradling Katia’s with one hand squeezing her little foot before he planned to take her into Rossi’s office? What a life they had cultivated together. As he sipped his drink, the bliss in his tummy was not doused by it.
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
Slouching on the sofa, Spencer watched with tired eyes as Katia stumbled in the room, her hands held in Y/N’s while she waddled between his legs. Her round face lit up at the sight of Spencer. Her pace increased beyond her abilities and Katia swung forward a little as she almost fell over.
“Oh dear,” Y/N cooed while Katia got back to her unstable feet. “That’s it, there we go.”
Spencer wished he had the energy to properly appreciate this moment, especially since both his boyfriend and their daughter were grinning like they shared a secret.
Katia dropped down onto her nappy-cushioned bottom then began to crawl over to Spencer’s feet. His hands, although dirty, rough and near ruined, accepted her offer and lifted Katia up into his lap. They stayed for safety around her middle, keeping her sat up straight as she looked on him with those big eyes. Eyes that were fresh and untainted copies of his own.
Y/N sat down beside Spencer, leaning in close to Katia so he caught her attention, “Hey, why don’t you show your Daddy what we’ve been practicing?”
Looking away from both her Dads, Katia drooled and pushed her fist in her mouth. Y/N waved until he and Spencer were back into her line of sight.
“Go on, sugar plum.” He pointed to Spencer, “Who’s that?” And he mouthed the answer to her.
“Dadadadadada.”
It was barely above a whisper. But her little grin, the top of a tooth poking out of the centre of her bottom gums, the way Katia looked at Spencer when she said it? A soft “oh” fell from Spencer’s lips and he clutched her close, her chubby arms barely reaching around his neck. His breath shaking out of him, he kissed the thick thatch of hair that had sprouted in his absence. He could feel Katia whispering “Dadadadada!” again.
“That’s me, Katia, I’m your Dada.” He sniffed back the sting in his eyes at the absolute proof that, in his time away from her, she had remembered him. When he moved away, placing Katia back into his lap, he closed his eyes as Katia’s scrabbling fingers rubbed across the tip of his nose.
Katia made a sudden attempt to stand, throwing her entire bodyweight towards Spencer. Spencer’s breath was snatched from his lungs and the tension remained even after he caught her with ease.
“You ok?” Y/N said and Spencer noticed that his hand was supporting his against Katia.
Spencer nodded weakly, “Hmm, you?”
“Better now.” Y/N let his hand go and began rubbing Spencer’s back in the same circular motions that Spencer rubbed Katia’s.
A tug snagged Spencer’s head to the left and he tutted as Katia grabbed at his cheek, “Ow, Katia, no.”
Instead, Katia took a fistful of the next thing she could find, which was Spencer’s hair, and she cried out an identical (if higher pitched) “Ow!”
“You hurt Spencer, not the other way around, Katia. Stop faking.” Y/N scolded playfully.
But Katia repeated Spencer’s outburst again, “Ow!”
Y/N lifted Katia’s little fist from Spencer’s hair, and it immediately clamped down on Spencer’s finger as an alternative to wave about.
Spencer kissed her hand, still so tiny and forgiving against his. He looked at Y/N, blinking fast as he half-heartedly said, “She’s so like you.”
The lock of hair Katia had yanked on curved around Y/N’s touch as he put it back into the disarray of fluff that stood around Spencer’s head, “That’s funny, because I think she’s so like you.”
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
Tilting the pram onto its back wheels, Spencer pushed it up the step and into the aquarium tunnel. Katia lay back in her seat while gumming on her blanket corner. Her eyes were ready to take in the sights.
Y/N knelt before her, suffering a few kicks to his knees from Katia’s excitement. Her pram clips were undone. Little Katia was released into her Daddy’s arms then plonked up onto his shoulders. Her starfish-like hands pressed up against the glass. Her mouth became as wide as her eyes as she pointed at the stingray rippling past. She had seen fish before (Carl and Rosalind at home) but never like this.
“Yeah, that’s a ray, Katia,” Y/N rubbed his fingers over her back, his hands still to keep her steady.
Spencer pointed his finger right next to hers, “They use their electro-sensors, not their eyes, to find their meals which consists of shrimps, clams, and -”
Katia shrieked – interrupting his and she smacked her hands against the glass. No one seemed to mind though. Some patrons in the tunnel even chuckled at her behaviour. Like she needed any more encouragement, especially with Y/N grinning up at her and tickling her sides to elicit more laughter from his daughter.
When Spencer’s hand dropped, Katia shouted again. A little confused, he returned it and Katia took his finger in her hand then began dragging the tip across where the ray was.
“She wants it as a pet, what do you say, baby?”
“I thought you said not to get you any fish for your birthday.”
Eventually Katia was returned to the pram. Her head was thrown back to watch the rest of the tunnel go by. Then she hid her face in her blankie once they were out in the last few exhibits. There was a little tug of war to get her to let it go (she was a lot stronger than Y/N gave her credit for) and see the one other exhibit that both parents were invested in.
Taking her hand again, Spencer squatted beside the pram. “Hey look, the men seahorsies have the babies. They’re just like your Daddy.”
“Your favourite Daddy,” Y/N ruffled Spencer’s hair while Spencer pretended to be outraged. Katia caught onto the dramatic expression Spencer was wearing and copied him with a gasp added for good measure.
“What d’you reckon, any of these were babies when we went to visit last time?”
“Well, Y/N, the lifespan of these seahorses is approximately a year. So they could be.” He knew it was unlikely but, for the sake of the smiles on Y/N’s and Katia’s face, Spencer let it be.
337 notes · View notes
statticscribbles · 4 years ago
Text
I and Love and You
Summary: Sweet Pea/Reader Request: Sweet Pea finds his first love in you, but due to your parents you know you can’t be with someone from the Southside
“Hey Y/N you doing okay?” You nod to Betty not taking your eyes off of the book you’re reading. “Y/N.” You look up nodding once more. “Yes, I’m fine.” You repeat what you’ve said the last five times she asked. “You don’t sound fine.” “I am. Just a cold.” “Toni said she heard you crying the the locker room and-“You shut your book standing and walking past her. “Y/N!” You can hear Sweet Pea shout out as you walk by and you bite down the urge to run. You slide into the girls locker room, hands white knuckled on your book. You take a couple of shaky breaths before turning to see Cheryl standing watching you.
“You know this is hurting everyone right? We can all see it. Why’d you lie about everything?” You step back as Cheryl walks forward. “I didn’t lie I-“ “You lied, everyone knows you’d never cheat on him, that you two were going to be that sickening couple that are high school sweethearts; that get married and live happily ever after; so what’s going on.” She narrows her eyes and you avert yours. “He’s from the Southside.” You mumble and Cheryl arches an eyebrow. “You actually give a shit about that dumb imaginary line?” You shake your head. “No; my parents do.” You don’t say anything else. Cheryl pulls you into a hug. “You should tell everyone that. You know Sweet Pea actually came to me, to ask me to talk to you. He’s a mess; he thinks you hate him.” “I don’t.”
“Everyone knows that, but he’s starting to believe it.” “Cheryl, I can’t; if my parents see me talking to him they’ll flip.” “It won’t be him, we’ll be there, if a Southsider happens to show up at La Bonne Nuit well what can you do.” She smiles and you return it unease already building in your stomach.
————————————————————————————— You’re relieved your parents buy the lie, Veronica wanted to have a Vixen’s get together and Betty needed you to cover it for the Blue and Gold. You let them drop you off, the Vixen’s gathered in pop’s before going down; you can tell Veronica and Cheryl are going overboard to appear like they’re counting and checking everyone as your parents drive off. “Okay we clear?” Veronica nods as Reggie opens the door. You relax as the door closes and you can hear everyone else’s voices talking. You follow Reggie down nervously waiting for everyone to turn to you.You can see Cheryl and Toni turn first, but Sweet Pea is the first to move towards you. “Hey Y/N.” ‘Hey Sweet Pea.” “Cheryl told me that-“ “I’m sorry about everything. I still think it’s best for us, to not be an us.” Sweet Pea swallows and steps back. “Don’t; I’m; I’m sorry.” Sweet Pea nods stepping forward as you do, meeting half way to hug you. “I love you.” “I know, I love you still.” You respond and Sweet Pea sighs relaxing. “Can we just, try again. Please.” “Of course.” You smile nervous as your phone lights up. You scowl at your mother’s text.
“I’m going home. I’ll see you at school. Bye.” You leave before they respond returning home to your parents questioning. “No I just went out with Cheryl and the rest of the vixen’s, and then those Southsider’s showed up so I came home, like you told me to.” You want to choke on the pride your mother has in her eyes. You hope they don’t catch onto the lie, but you know they will. You’re not surprised when your mother comes in two hours later sitting on the edge of your bed, it’s where she sits when she’s angry.
“Sweetheart, do you want to tell me why there’s a picture of the vixen party up online, with you, wearing a Serpent jacket.” You swallow shrugging. “Someone left it, we thought it would be funny to try it on.” “Is that what you’re going with?” She glares and you nod. “It’s the truth.” She glares as she leaves but you don’t hear her talking to your aunt on the phone like when she found out you and Sweet Pea were dating. You’d heard the midnight conversations, the arrangements for you to move out to your aunt’s all the way across the country. ————————————————————————————–
You make it to school exhausted from worrying most of the night, you meet Cheryl and Sweet Pea at the front. “We took down the photo and-“ “Damage is done. Apparently I’m going to be grounded for a year when I get back home after today.” You sigh rubbing your eyes and yawning. Cheryl offers an apologetic smile and you shrug curling into Sweet Pea’s side. “I meant what I said about trying again.” You mumble into his shoulder and he smiles kissing your forehead. “Don’t worry, I’ll wait for you the entire year if you need. I’m sure your parents won’t keep you on lockdown for a full year over a jacket.” “You don’t know them.” You laugh hollowly and kiss Sweet Pea before you rush off to class.
You sit with everyone at lunch slowly explaining what you think will be the terms of your grounding. You can tell they’re already scheming ways to get around it. “Guys, I love all of you, but I don’t think my parents will let me go anywhere without a chaperone. Seriously.” You laugh when they joke about becoming bodyguards for you.
————————————————————————————-
“Hey mom I’m home I have a lot of homework to do so-“ You trail off watching your aunt sipping tea on the couch. “Hey, I thought I was grounded, are you here for a visit?” You question and your aunt smiles. “Yes, just a visit. You mother needed consoling after that stunt you pulled, wearing a Serpent jacket, the nerve of you putting that filth on.” She huffs and you sit on the edge of the arm chair.
“Well she’s all packed and-Oh! Y/N there you are sweetheart, come on.” “Where are we going?” “To visit some of your aunt’s friends, didn’t she tell you?” You shake your head and you father smiles nudging you towards the door. “Come on, we don’t want to be late, they’re making dinner now.” You nod following your father as he stows your bags in the trunk. “What’s that for?” “Your room.” He states as he buckles his seat belt.
“My room where? Mom said we weren’t moving, just that I was grounded and-“ You panic as the doors lock. “Dad?” “Hush dear, it’s the only place we can make sure you’re away from those horrible Serpents.” You sit silent, shaking as they pull up to a stone building. You don’t move even when they open the doors for you. “Y/N don’t be stubborn, come on, these people are very nice.” “Hello dear, my name is Sister Woodhouse; I’ll be looking after you while you stay here.” You frown as you read the carved stone above the doorway. ———————————————————————————-
“Why would they send her to the sisters; I mean we can go visit whenever..” Betty and Jughead share look and turn to Sweet Pea. “You guys were safe, when you know you-“ “Yes we were.” Sweet Pea rolls his eyes. “Oh my god, what if Y/N’s gay” Fangs states. “Fangs, why would she be dating me if she was into girls.” “It’s always good to have options.” Toni laughs smiling. “Either way, we should still be able to use that tunnel right?” ‘Well yeah, but we don’t know where she is; I don’t know if we can search the entire place before they catch us.” “Half of us go in the front? The other through the tunnel?” Jughead nods breaking the group into halves and giving everyone positions. ———————————————————————————
You like the art class they have you sit in, you’re not entirely sure why everyone draws the same thing, the odd shaped skull faced creature.The sister’s don’t mind your art, you wonder if they send the drawings of snakes home to your parents.you can hear shouting, and running, you wonder which one of the others is trying to escape, you shrink against your seat, hiding behind your easel, they’ll punish you if you try to leave again.
“Y/N?” Don’t respond, it’s a recording like last time you assure yourself. The sisters are trying to see if you’ll escape again. You peek over the edge of your easel watching the Serpent logo flashing as the figure leaves. “Wait.” You stumble forward. You’re trying your best to follow the jacket, you manage to grab onto the leather tugging back feeling their arms around you; you can hear the sisters shouting, and can feel the arms around you move. “Don’t leave.” You can’t help but ask. “We have to, come on, we have like five minutes before he rest of them show up; it’s not that far to the tunnel to get you out.”
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bloodletterepicness · 3 years ago
Text
The beginning, middle and everything else...
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There’s a fuckton of sappy quotes about how you can never go home again...Well that shit is a fucking lie. I pulled the matte black Escalade to a stop in front of the Manse and put it in park. No matter how far I wandered off, I always came back to the only home I knew. That fucking Darius...just thinking of the Brother had my five chambered heart tightening up in a moment of pain... He created this place from the inside of that brilliant mind of his and had fucking hoped, we would embrace it… No one wanted to at first and now, I’d worship the male for what he had made possible for us brothers and our race.
I slid my sunglasses down over my eyes and stepped out of the SUV, leaving it there for now. It was as if just being in the presence of this place, I felt a sense of being at peace, which let’s face it, that shit is not my normal. My shoulders relaxed with each step I took towards those double doors and as always, they opened before I reached them. I didn’t even try stopping the grin that broke out on my face when Fritz appeared… There was no damn way that I showed up without letting him know I was back. That male deserved respect by the mother fucking barrel fulls.
‘Good evening, Sir...It’s with great pleasure, I welcome you home. I have personally made sure everything is put back exactly as you like it.’
I clapped the old man on the shoulder and nodded in approval.
“Thank you , Fritz. As always, you go above and beyond and I’ve been lost as fuck without you.”
There was no mistaking the slight color that came to his weathered face at the praise and I squeezed his shoulder. I gave one last nod before I walked through the doors and I stopped for just a moment to take in the brilliance that was Darius’s creation. I wasn’t given long in that time before the King himself strolled over the mosaic apple tree that twisted across the hall floor. It was an honor to have the Brother as our King but more than that, he was my family. Wrath stopped, he knew I was there, sight or not, he knew and no words were spoken as we both stayed several feet apart. A mutual understanding was there. We both started moving and only barely stalled in our steps as we passed one another and bumped shoulders. I had a shit eating grin on my face all the way to the other side of the massive space, where the entryway was to the places beneath.
‘It’s about damn time. I thought I was going to have to hogtie you.’
I stopped mid step at hearing that joking tone and turned to see the larger than life, Rhage and his cheerful fucking smile. Which had me returning it ten folds back to him and then I was actually yanked up off the ground by the brother in a damn hug. I was grumbling and shoving at the vice like fucking hold before I just gave in and let him have his moment.
“Alright fucker. It’s good to see you to but let a male fucking breathe.”
I was chuckling and growling a little between each word and finally we were disconnected and my shitkickers were on solid ground again.
“Let's not have a repeat of that. You get one of those every hundred or so years.”
It was next to impossible not to feel good when you were around the male, he had a personality that boasted of carefree and straight up peppy and I hate using that damn word but that’s what Rhage was.
‘Yeah yeah yeah...You just wait, I’ll sneak those in and make you hug me.’
A single tatted brow arched half to my hairline and I gave my best roguish grin.
“Watch out, Brother. I might think you are into bondage, with all this talk of tying me up and wrapping them fucking boulders around me.”
Rhage punched me in the arm and I might’ve gotten knocked off balance by a half an inch before I found us roughhousing right there in the grand hall, laughing our asses off.
“Alright, motherfucker...I missed you too. There I said it.”
I let the male out of the neckhold I had him in and he shoved all that blonde hair out of his eyes.
‘I’ll be down later to harass you.’
With that I turned on my heel, went through the door and headed down the tunnels, going past all the places I knew as intimate as I did my Penthouse. I reached my arm out to the side and let my fingertips glide along the smooth concrete wall. There was music playing much further down, I could feel the bass thumping and I knew who was abusing a certain treadmill. All it took was another hundred feet to confirm my assumption and I was looking at the state of the art gym and Zadist running as if the hounds of hell were chasing him. That action stopped when he spotted me and out of my perihal vision I saw his twin, Phury was here as well. Both Brothers stayed exactly where they were, as did I and it was Phury who broke the silence at the same time he shut the speakers off.
‘You’ve been greatly missed.’
Okay that wasn’t exactly what I expected but that thought of mine was cut off when Phury finished his words.
‘The cable keeps going in and out and that damn angel won’t stop complaining about it and everytime any of us Brother’s try to fix it...It gets worse and so does his mouth.’
Zadists chose that moment to chime in with a grunt of agreement and a few choice words.
‘I’m going to kill that flapping bird at some point. Fix it Vishous.’
And with that, both brothers went back to working out as if I hadn’t fucking been gone at all. I stayed there maybe a second longer before I laughed out loud, catching both males off guard. I was going to have to lock myself away in my office for a day and get shit straightened out around this place. I left Rhage in charge of my surveillance...who knew how bad he fucked that shit up. I might end up having to break his damn fingers if it was too much of a clusterfuck. Okay yeah that wasn’t going to happen but now that I was back, no more fucking with my shit. My thoughts had been going a mile a damn minute that I hadn’t realized that I was already at the Pit, my first home, the solitude that I needed at times and yet Rhage and Z, still managed to find themselves down here on the motherfucking nightly. I was shaking my head and laughing to myself as I was getting ready to enter the code on the penpad and the door opened of its own accord. There on the massive screen that covered a whole wall, the game was playing and Butch was laying on the couch with a drink in hand.
‘I was wondering how damn long it would take you to get from the front door to here.’
“Motherfucker…’
‘I am but I still had your ass here sooner. So who was it? Which one?’
I went inside, let the door silently close behind me, stripped my leather off along with my arsenal of weapons and dropped it all on the counter.
“You know who the hell it was… Rhage!”
That statement had Cop cracking the fuck up and almost spitting out his Lag.
“Don’t die on me now, fucker. I just got back.”
I was full on smirking as I slid over the back of the other couch and stretched out on it, letting my head rest on the plump arm of the leather couch and melting into all the familiar softness.
‘It’s a good thing because I’m pretty positive Rhage was making plans on trying to move down here and into your bedroom.’
I didn’t miss the bottle of Goose sitting on the table or the handrolls laid out beside it. I gave my Brother a smile of thanks and snatched up both.
“Fuck that shit. Nobody is sleeping in my bed...Nope. Hard fuck NO. Not happening in any damn century.”
Butch snorted out a laugh.
‘Yeah, Fritz actually put a padlock on your door and kept the key. He said…’
Cop tried hard as hell to imitate Fritz, even adding in some proper anxious hand movements into the act.
‘that Master Vishous could not come home to a bed that had been slept in by others.’
I was full on roaring out in laughter by the time he was done and fuck, it felt epic...
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mcyt-transcribed · 3 years ago
Text
youtube
transcript of “where I've been”
TW for discussion of cancer and Covid-19
 Here’s the Google Doc link or you can click on the read more.
Techno: Yo, Technoblade here with another upload, oh my God I can’t believe it. We’re back, we’re playing Bedwars, uh, I don’t know why I said that in the present tense because I actually recorded these Bedwars games a few days ago. I have- I’ve played like, almost no Bedwars since the win streak, which was like, I dunno, years ago - so, you know, forgive me if I’m a little rusty. These are literally just the first three games of Bedwars I played, recorded them, and then just threw them in this background footage because, you know, I like live commentaries a lot, but I feel like sometimes, when you have a topic to talk about, having to play a video game simultaneously can sorta- it can sorta detract from the commentary, you know?
But before that: a plushie commercial filmed on my iPhone.
We got the first one - it’s Technoblade. He’s in a flying pose. He’s flying to save some civilians or he’s falling flat on his face. Depends on who you ask. Alright. We got the- We got Technoblade. He’s sitting down. He’s- He’s seated. He’s seated. It’s incredibly exciting. Uh, we got- we got Technoblade but he’s- he’s a giant- he’s a gigantic pillow. It’s Technopillow. This is actually- This is actually really- This is really soft. You’re gonna have to take my word for it.
These plushies go on sale on September 3rd at 3 PM EST at youtooz.com. The last ones sold out in around eight hours, so be prepared. I mean, one of them was like, two minutes but ehhh, it’s not happening again.
So where has Technoblade been? I know I’ve been gone since like, June. I was actually being really productive in July, which I know you guys are gonna- You’re not gonna believe me when I say that because I made no content. But I was! I was, you gotta believe me, okay? I was getting so much work done IRL; I was like, filling out paperwork, making business moves, working on merchandise, buying new equipment to make new videos. ‘Cause I really wanted- I really wanted to increase the rate at which I was making videos, ‘cause I kinda spent- You know, I kinda spent like, all this time becoming a famous YouTube and then instantly like, stopped uploading. Which, I mean, to be fair, I guess that started more in like 2018. So, that’s more just a pattern now.
 But I figured, you know, this whole thing where I go two- you know, one or two months without uploading- I don’t want that to be me, man. I wanna be uploading at least once per week. So I spent a lot of time preparing to do that. And the plan was that I would start doing that in August, but I took a- It didn’t- It’s, uh- It’s not going great, I’m not going to lie to you.
So in the last two days of July I noticed that my right arm was starting to hurt a decent amount and I thought- My best guess was that it was some kind of repetitive stress injury, ‘cause you know I’ve been playing video games since the age of like, five. It’s pretty much nonstop. I was gonna get carpal tunnel at some point but, uh, I took a few days to rest my arm and it really didn’t… really didn’t feel any better after that. And so after a few days of that, I looked at myself in the mirror and I noticed that my right shoulder was starting to swell like crazy and I was like, “Oh my God! I must’ve broken a bone, this is-” I mean, this- It looked- it looked crazy.
So, you know, the next day - August 2nd - I, uh, headed over to the doctor to see what was wrong and uh, they ran a couple of scans and then they came back and they told me that, uh, the reason my arm hurts is because I have cancer.
That really couldn’t have gone worse, I don’t think. I feel a bit silly talking about this with, uh, Minecraft in the background; it feels a bit out of place. But I’m a Minecraft YouTuber - I don’t- I don’t do a face cam. Which is I guess how most people would talk about serious things, with a face cam. I also probably, uh- *chuckles* Also probably a bit weird to plug my merchandise in the- in the same video, like, “Hey, guys, I have a- I have a terrible disease, also buy my plushies, bro.” But uh- *laughs* Listen: I’ve been waiting so many months to sell those plushies, bro. And it keeps getting delayed and now cancer thinks it can stop me. No no no no no. I’m trying to make some bank, bro. I wanna get paid, also they look fantastic, I mean just look at them, they look incredible. Alright?
I mean, I guess it would be ideal to like, split up the announcements, but I’m going back into chemotherapy next week; I don’t got time for this, man. We gotta go!
To be fair, I could make this a lot weirder; I could have like, the thumbnail be a giant red arrow pointing to my tumor with the caption “Might die! Not clickbait!” *laughs* Yeah, just the ultimate- the ultimate YouTuber, bro. We’re clickbaiting the whole process.
So after the scans come in, I get transferred to another hospital which has an oncology award, so it’s a lot more specialized towards what I need. And I’m sorta like sitting there in the bed for a couple of days like, “Hello. Could I please get some healthcare? Could I- Could I just get a- Could I just get a crumb of healthcare? Please! Like, I *stutters* I wanna see people sprinting, you know? I feel like I want to see some urgency, you know? If you guys gotta- *stammers* You know, there’s like, this tumor on my arm - if you guys could just- if you guys could just get rid of it. Just get rid of it right now! Could we just go? If you gotta cut off my arm, cut off my arm, bro - do what you gotta do. I won’t complain, man, I’ve won enough Minecraft tournaments. I’ll just play Minecraft with my feet from here on out, bro. I’ll still be B tier at least, okay? It’s fine. Do what you gotta do.”
But then the doctors are telling me, “Oh, well, we can’t- we can’t do it immediately. We gotta- We gotta find out what it is, we gotta run some tests, do a biopsy.” I’m like, “Okay, do the biopsy.” Like, “Oh, well first we gotta do some scans.” I’m like, “Alright, dude, the scans.” And so it took a couple of days and then they did a biopsy, uh, three days later. And then I was like, “Alright. Let’s go!” And they were like, “Oh, well, the biopsy is gonna take like, a week or more to get back.” And I’m just sitting here like, “Bruh, please. Please, just treat me.”
I mean, it makes sense. It makes a lot of sense and I’m sure they know what they’re doing, but I’m just sitting there in the hospital like, “Please. Please, healthcare.” So they get the biopsy and they send me home and they’re saying like, I’ll come back in like a week or so when they have a treatment plan prepared, and so I- It was a very fun week at home ‘cause I was sitting there still not getting treated and I was just like, looking at my tumor like, “Alright, Mr. Tumor. You know, you need me to survive so it’s in your best interest to just- to just chill out for a little bit, you know? We don’t wanna go too crazy.”
And faintly- Faintly if you strain your ears, underneath my skin you can hear:
[Dream’s speedrun music plays for a few seconds]
Techno: Yeah, it was a really fun week. But I did finally get started on chemotherapy, which is a wonderful process. Let me explain chemotherapy. So basically uh, you know how society has progressed for thousands of years of technological and medical innovation? So basically, one of the top three ways we have to fight cancer is uh, for you to go to the hospital and then they uh, plug you into a machine and then they inject poison directly into your veins for several days. That’s uh, that’s one of the best ways we’ve got of going about this and the poison- it’s supposed to kill the cancer - it uh, also kills things like, you know, blood. But ehhh, does anybody really need blood? I feel like it’s pretty optional, you know? Uh- *small laugh* Blood for the Blood God as it were, alright? Uh, I’ll take what I can get.
I, uh, you know, I used to have a channel meme- ‘cause back in the day- you know how my motivation always goes up and down in, like, cycles? I used to have a meme where whenever I’d get super motivated I’d, ya know, I’d start uploading, like crazy. I’d also do things like get a haircut. And, so, I joked that, uh, the less hair I had, the more I’d upload. ‘Cause that’s- the hair was holding me back. And so, if that’s still true, I gotta say, chemotherapy, that’s gotta be daily uploads or something, bro. *laughs* It’s gonna be- Chemotherapy Arc is gonna be fantastic for content.
Well, ya know, after I got diagnosed, I, uh, I’ve been making a lot of phone calls- ya know, informing all of my distant family members about the situation- and, I gotta say, of all the phone calls I’ve made, nobody took the news worse than my health insurance provider. They’ve been inconsolable for weeks. They were like, “You got what!? No!” 
I mean, I had no idea they cared so much. They’ve just- oh my God. I- I think they’re the real victims of this. I mean, could you imagine? Could you imagine? Like, look at me! I was a healthy twenty-two year old, I, like, barely went to the doctor, even for, like, regular appointments. I- I guess I went to the dentist, that’s the one thing I did. I was the freest paycheck they’ve ever seen in their lives. They could’ve been milking money off of me for decades. And then, bam, cancer, bro. *laughs* Oh, those poor guys. 
Uh, the one- the one favor I- I do wanna ask- If you guys could all do one small favor for Technoblade- uh, you know that coronavirus thing you been hearing in the news for the last couple of years? Uh, I want you guys to get rid of it. Just, uh, I want it gone. Just a couple days should be sufficient for you guys to do that.
No, but, seriously. I’m kind of, uh, immunocompromised right now, which means, uh, if a bacteria touches me or, like, a virus touches me, I will explode. So, yeah, uh, I wanna- get the vaccine, is what I’m saying.
I’m gonna get cancelled by the anti-vaxxers for saying it, but it’s such a good vaccine, bro. Pfizer got full FDA approval, this week, for people aged sixteen and up. I think you- you can also get it if you’re eleven to fifteen if you’ve got emergency approval or whatever. Uh, I mean, if you have any concerns, don’t listen to a Minecraft YouTuber, but, please, at least talk to a doctor. Because it’s- it’s so good bro. It’s so good.
The hospitals are currently getting flooded by unvaccinated people. I’m gonna go ahead and speak on behalf of all cancer patients when I say that it is incredibly annoying when the- when the hospitals are getting overworked by people dying of preventable diseases. I’m just saying- we got dibs on those hospital beds. So, ya know, you- you probably don’t- you don’t even want them really. You don’t even want to need them. So, I think the vaccine… what is it? It, like, reduces the chances of you needing hospitalization from Covid by, like, ninety-six percent? I mean, it’s so effective, bro! Come on! I mean, you might still get, like… I mean, you could still catch coronavirus, but, like, the symptoms are gonna be so much milder, bro, I’m just saying. Think about it. Think about it. Talk to a doctor.
I remember when I first went in for chemotherapy, A: I was thrilled, ‘cause, like, yo! Healthcare! Inject it into my veins, bro! Let’s go! But, also, like, the first couple of days were actually pretty chill. I was like, ‘Dang! This is easy, bro!’. And then it kicked in. And then it kicked in. My energy levels were zero; they were absolutely nothing. It’s hard to describe how tired I was, but I think my one example is- so they let me go back home. And after several days of resting, I had a virtual appointment with a doctor. And, so, they were, like, ‘Alright’. And I was just sitting there, like, ‘Wait a second. You guys want me to sit upright in a chair for an hour? What is this, the Olympics, bro? I’m going back to bed! What? What?’ *laughs* ‘Wha? Let’s calm down here. Sitting in a chair? Am I Superman? Like, come one, bro.’
As you can probably tell, I’m feeling a lot better right now. Which is, uh, I think that’s part of the process, is, uh, you get a little bit of recovery time to, uh, ya know, eat a lot of really good food- get the weight back- and get ready for the next round.
And, uh, before we go back for the next round, I’m gonna be playing a lot of video games, uh, making some content, seeing if I can get some more videos prepared, because, uh- I know people are gonna be like, ‘No! Technoblade! You don’t need to make videos for us! Please rest!’
Nah, this isn’t about you, bro. This is about me. I enjoy this, man. This is, like, one of the safest and most fun things I could be doing right now, bro, I’m gonna do it. I don’t know how much content I could make, ‘cause I’m kinda slow, but we’ll see. We’ll see.
I already have a video prepared for next week, uh, September third. You guys are gonna love it. It’s, uh, it was actually- it’s kind of, kind of an old video. It was, uh, from a few months ago, but it’s very good. So, yeah! You guys have that to look forward to. 
And, for the record, I know I’ve been complaining a lot in this video, but I just wanna clarify that the doctors I have are, like, insanely good, bro. I’m gonna be getting some of the finest healthcare in the world, so don’t worry about me too much.
I think the treatment has already started to show some results. I- I mean, it’s been so short of a time, so the results aren’t gonna be insane or anything, but, at the very least, the speedrun music has stopped playing. 
So, yeah, that’s where I’ve been and that’s what I’m gonna be doing for the foreseeable future. Wish me luck, and, uh, wear a mask, I guess. Ya know, standard coronavirus procedures. All that coronavirus stuff and like, getting vaccinated - that goes double for Californians, okay? But it helps everywhere.
Uh, that’s all I’ve got for today. See you guys next time!
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buckysmischief · 4 years ago
Text
pinch me, i'm dreaming
Scott Lang x reader
Word Count: 1.7k
Summary: A trip to San Francisco reveals a side of Scott you didn’t know about
Warnings: language, fluff, a little angsty if you squint
AN: this is for @starspangledseb​ ‘s writing challenge, sorry it’s so late. I hope you like it 💙 prompt is bolded
Masterlist
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“I just don’t see why we have to stay with Scott.”
“We can’t stay in San Francisco and not stay with Scott, Yn, that’s just rude.”
“Come on Sam,” Bucky chimed in, “you know why she doesn’t want to go.”
“Oh, yeah, you’ve gotta thing for tic tac.” Sam knew what he was doing, and you weren’t going to give him the satisfaction.
He wasn’t wrong though, you do have feelings for Scott, but he was with Hope and you weren’t a homewrecker. It was pretty easy to suppress those feelings when you lived on the other side of the country, what were you supposed to do sleeping under the same roof?
“I will put this jet so deep into the pacific, don’t think I won’t.” You had two options: suck it up and act like a normal person, or possibly set yourself up to get your heart a little broken.
If you didn’t already know for a fact you were going to embarrass yourself, things might be different, but things just happened when you were around Scott. Like the time Sam had a dinner party and was passing out the food, Spaghetti had fallen in Scott’s lap and for whatever reason you jumped to help. Hope had walked in while he was unbuttoning his flannel and you were gripping his bicep, just trying to get him cleaned up.
“Don’t think too much about it, Yn.” Bucky tried to calm your nerves, but it was too late for that. “Just say you’re tired from the mission and flying and just go to bed, I’ll even sneak you some food later if you want.” It wouldn’t be a lie, and if Hope was there it would probably be for the best.
Unfortunately though, Scott seemed to have other ideas.
“Hey guys, hey Yn.” He always seemed to be smiling, but you could have sworn it got a little bigger after saying your name. “I figured you guys might be hungry so I ordered food, it just got here maybe five minutes ago.”
The table only had four places set, so Hope probably wasn’t there, but Sam couldn’t resist himself, “Is Hope not here or-”
“We broke up a few weeks ago, it was a mutual thing.” He was answering Sam, but his eyes kept darting to you.
“Mutual?” Sam asked, knowing there was more.
“Okay, so maybe it was more my decision.” That got your attention. “She didn’t fight it though.”
The possibility of Scott being single wasn’t anything you considered before, but now it was mind consuming. So much so that you didn’t notice everyone was done eating until they were getting up from the table.
Bucky had mentioned something about watching a movie, and by the time you got to the living room the only seat left was on the loveseat next to Scott. There wasn’t a doubt in your mind that Sam and Bucky did it on purpose. Now that Hope was out of the picture, nothing was going to stop them from messing with you.
“I thought you might want a blanket,” he whispered as you sat beside him. With a smile you thanked him, but warning him it might make you fall asleep before the movie really even got started. “I can sit on the floor if you want to lay down-”
“Please don’t..” The words came out desperate and whiney, thankfully Bucky and Sam didn’t seem to notice. Scott smiled and covered you with the oversized blanket. Gathering all the confidence you had, you gestured for him to cover up too. It was cold inside, and it wasn’t fair he was the only one without a blanket. Just as predicted, though, you were asleep before a movie was even picked.
It had to have been after midnight when you woke up. The TV was still on, Sam and Bucky were nowhere in sight, and your head was in someone’s lap. Oh shit, Scott.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep on you..”
“It’s fine, you moved around a lot at first and somehow found your way here.” He looked down at you and moved the hair out of your face. “Go back to sleep.”
He said it so naturally, like this was something that happened between you two every night. For the first time you let your imagination run wild with thoughts of him. Was waking up to him always this peaceful? Was he the type to fall asleep with you on the couch, or would he carry you to bed? Was he even the cuddling type?
“What if I don’t want to?”
“Then you can help me pack up some stuff.”
“What kinda stuff?” You sat up and tried to fix your bed head.
He smirked, “Stuff for New York.” Apparently while you were sleeping, the boys had convinced Scott to get away from San Francisco for a few weeks.
You followed him to his room and picked out his outfits while he got all his Ant-Man gear together. This was the first time you were ever truly alone with Scott and it felt more normal than it should. Nothing felt awkward, nothing embarrassing happened, it was nice.
When everything was packed, Scott shrunk his bags down so they would fit in his suitcase keychain. He could tell you weren’t ready to go back to sleep, even though you both looked exhausted, so he took you back downstairs. “What are we doing?”
“I want to show you something.” He put his hand in yours and led you through the basement and to a room behind a bookcase. It was filled with different suits, gadgets, tools, and a wall of glass that covered the dirt. “I wanted the ants to have their own area that didn’t feel like it was a part of some science experiment, there’s glass tunnels so they can come and go but you should see the colonies they made in the dirt. It’s amazing.”
“It’s beautiful.” You whispered, watching the ants move around the tunnels. “You didn’t show Sam and Bucky?”
“I haven’t shown this room to anyone.” He didn’t move from behind you, but you could see him in the reflection of the glass.
That was the ego boost you needed apparently. You turned around and looked into his eyes, they were tired but focused only on you. “I’m glad that not everyone gets the privilege to see this side of you, then. It makes me feel more special.”
Again he smiled down at you, placing his hand behind the nape of your neck like it was always meant to be there, “Then I know exactly what I’ll be doing the next few weeks.”
“What?”
“Doing whatever I can to always make you feel more special.” How was this not a dream? It’s not a dream… right? “Do you want some coffee?” You nodded and followed him up the stairs, not remembering a time he’s sounded so serious.
Sitting in the kitchen, you noticed the sun was going to come out soon, which meant the boys wouldn’t be asleep much longer. No matter what timezone they were in or how sleep deprived they were - if the sun was up, they were up. Whatever Scott wanted to say, you just hoped he said it before one of them came downstairs and ruined the moment.
He prepared everything in silence, waiting until he handed you a steaming cup with some cream and sugar on the side. “For a long time I knew I had feelings for you, but I didn’t know what they were exactly...”
He paused to take a sip of his coffee and continued. “It wasn’t too long after Sam’s dinner and the spaghetti incident, remember that?” You nodded, slightly surprised that he remembered.
“Well, after Hope and I got back she.. She would get upset whenever you were brought up, like when I got called in on missions that you were on. I didn’t understand until after the rescue mission in Vegas-”
“You were there?” It shouldn’t have been a surprise considering it was a rescue mission for you.
“Yeah, Tony called and said you were kidnapped. I asked him where you were and left without saying anything to Hope, it was like my body was on autopilot.. After I got back Sam called and told me you finally woke up.. that’s when I realized what the feelings were and why Hope was getting so upset, she saw what I didn’t.”
“And those feelings are what exactly?”
“The kind where I’ve been wanting to kiss you since you walked through my front door, the kind that made me stay awake for hours even though I’m beyond tired because I wanted to appreciate every second I had. Sam was dropping hints all night to just make a move but didn’t think you felt the same, I still don’t-”
Before he could finish, Bucky walked in the kitchen and did exactly what you knew he’d do. “Stop rambling, she likes you too. Now just kiss the damn girl and let’s go.”
“DAMN IT Bucky! Don’t you have anyone back in the 40’s you can go back to like Steve did?!” He stood there in shock, realizing he should have just waited an extra five minutes at the top of the stairs.
While you yelled at Bucky, Scott made his way around the kitchen island and did exactly as Bucky suggested and kissed you right there. It was a moment you only thought would exist in your dreams, except for Bucky standing seven feet away and Sam sitting on the stairs giving Scott two thumbs up. It took Sam physically pulling you away from Scott for you to come up for air.
“If either of you mention this to anyone I’ll get Scott to put ants in your ears.” You threatened, knowing they already got the proof they needed.
In the end it didn’t matter though, it took less than an hour for Tony to notice that Scott was never more than a foot away from you. Sam and Bucky’s laughter was all the confirmation everyone needed, but what surprised you the most was money being passed all around the room. “You’re all assholes, I hope you know that.”
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hyucksong · 4 years ago
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afraid.| lee jeno
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summary: Jeno asks you if you’re afraid to die. You lie twice, and tell the truth once. 
genre: angst and fluff
word count: 2.0k
warnings: sad and there’s definitely imperfections in the representation of hospital stays. also possible misunderstanding of metastatic brain tumors, please tell me if it’s so bad that i need to edit it. 
a/n: wrote this in one go, as an apology for not updating in like a month! i’ve been in the haikyuu hole :) 
-
Jeno asked you if you were afraid to die the first night he met you. It was on a dirty park bench at three am. As a newly admitted patient, the sterile white walls and the digital beep of the alarm clock every hour drove him crazy. He knew hospitals were supposed to help him, but he hated the confined feeling. The nurses and doctors would ask if he wanted anything, but when he said he wanted to leave, they'd glance at each other and wince, asking if he'd like anything else.
After they'd make an awkward exit, you'd always laugh in your bed. He'd glare at you and shift in his bed, muttering about how you would never understand.
"What're you here for, anyway? Got a bad headache?" Was the first thing he spitefully said, and he'd meant it with his whole heart. He didn't wish illness on anyone, but God, sometimes he wished that they could just understand. His terrible guess made you laugh even harder, he was close. "Hmm, close. I've got a brain tumor." And then he fell silent. A few minutes later he meekly whispered, "Sorry."
He made up for it by waking you up to go outside with him, "Just for some fresh air." He'd said. It was cold, and he shivered in his jacket the whole walk to the park. But you never shivered once despite goosebumps trailing up your arms. Your eyes were distant, and your mouth had a small, sad smile resting upon it.
"How long have you been admitted?" He asked, sitting on the opposite side of the bench from you. "About three months. I usually stay in my own room, but there was something wrong with the lights so I'm elsewhere until they fix it." Jeno nodded, uncomfortable. "...Can it be removed?" You sensed his hesitance and laughed, shaking your head. "I wish. It's too dangerous. I mean -- they could, technically. But there wouldn't really be a point." His confusion was written on his face, and it almost made you giggle. "It's cancerous. It's a secondary brain tumor. I've actually got a few up in there," You gently knocked your fist against your head, unbothered.
Jeno was confused -- weren't you scared to die? Would you die? How long did you have left to live? Why were you so happy?
"Are you...afraid of dying?" The question stilled you. The words tore at you, they pricked at your skin and your heart. You wished he hadn't said them. Shrugging, you turned your head and focused on an empty swing set that blew around from the wind. "I'm not afraid, I guess. I mean, it's inevitable for me. It's not 'are you of dying' for me, it's 'are you afraid to die.' It's not ''will you die' it's 'when will you die." You glanced at Jeno one last time, noticing his glimmering eyes that were so full of hope and want. They were full of determination to get better. You were sure yours were just tired. You just wanted to sleep the days away. 
"I've got a few months left. At least, that's what the doctors say." The boy nodded, fists clenched in his pockets. He didn’t know you, but he knew you didn’t deserve only a few more months.
-
Jeno asked if you were afraid to die after you had a seizure his second month there. You didn't tell him you’d been getting worse, but he'd overheard a few nurses talking about your worsening state. One of them said that you might as well just die; it'd make no difference. Jeno almost hit her.
"No, I'm not afraid." Your voice came out scratchy. The soup in front of you was barely touched, the steam coming off of it having stopped a while ago. "Why would I be? I've got the most awesome roommate." He'd been slightly flattered when you'd said that, but the next week you were moved back into your own room. Jeno thought about how much of a bummer that was, but he also remembered that he could just visit you.
He walked into your room one sunny afternoon after one of his treatments. Jeno's heart almost exploded when the nurse told him how much better he looked. Honestly, he'd almost cried. Going home seemed tangible, like a light at the end of the tunnel that he was running closer to.
The second he stepped past the door frame, he noticed something was off. You were facing the window with a pencil gripped in your hands, paper scattered around you. Jeno kept quiet as he slowly made his way to you, shaky lines and unfinished drawings plaguing the pages beneath him.
"W-What's wrong? Y/n?" Heavy breathing was all he got in response before you turned towards him, tears in your eyes. "My arms are really weak. It's hard to even lift them up, Jeno." He said nothing; just sat beside you and rubbed your back carefully. "I know, I know. It'll be okay." But it wasn't going to be. Jeno hated that he lied, and he hated that you knew he lied, but said nothing. He hated that he was getting better, but you weren't. He hated that he could left weights to stay strong but it was hard for you to even lift a bowl. He hated it all. He wanted to get better, but he wanted to get better with you. But you weren't getting any better. You were getting worse.
"Did you know that a symptom of the metastases can be changes in my behavior and personality, Jeno?" He shook his head, biting his lip.
"Would you love me if I changed, Jeno? If I wasn't who you know now?" He nodded, tears pricking at the corner of his eyes. And he meant it. "I'd love you no matter what."
-
The third and final time he's asked if you were afraid to die was three months after that. He'd checked in to take you out for a while, "For some fresh air," he said to you through the phone. He'd been released a month and a half ago. He'd gotten better, and quickly, too. It made you happy that he left the overly-sterile walls of the grim hospital. You felt mixed about him visiting you: you wanted him to visit you in your apartment, in your home. Not here.
It was late, and the nurses almost denied his request to take you out. But you were already dressed, hands in pockets and all. They’d shared looks with each other before letting you go. 
The park was empty again, the stars were bright, and your head was cold, mostly because of the lack of hair, but also because the air was biting at you. "You've got a thing for late night walks, don't you?" You teased, sitting on the slightly damp grass next to him. He laughed and nodded, "Only if those walks are with you." There was no denying the flush that rose to your cheeks. His hand gently slid into yours, fingers intertwining.
"Well, you'll have to get used to coming on these walks alone." You'd meant it lightheartedly, but Jeno's grip tightened. "...You're not getting any better?" He lowly asked. A humorless laugh left your lips, "Of course not, Jeno. I haven't been getting better for the past five months. Why would I start now?"
"You can get better at any time--"
"Well I'm not. That's not going to change, Jeno -- we've talked about this already. I'm going to die in that hospital." Jeno couldn't help but raise his voice, "Don't say that!"
"It's the truth! Stop lying to yourself!"
The silence was heavy and tense. It felt like the weight of the world rested on your shoulders. You hated it. But it was the truth. Jeno knew better than to argue any more. Instead, he kissed your shoulder softly before laying his head on it. He wished you were okay. He wished you'd go on another walk with him in three years from now, in fifty years from now, and when you both are readmitted into the same hospital on your deathbed.
But he couldn't stay blind to the truth. You needed to hold onto his arm the whole way here because your legs were wobbly. You grip was so weak compared to what it used to be. Your breaths were shallow. You were on the brink. And he couldn't pull you back from it.
"Are you afraid to die?" The familiar question rang in your ears sharply. There was no malevolence towards it. No hatred. Nothing. Just...acceptance. There was no denying your death. But there was a strange okayness with what was happening. You were happy with your life. You'd met Jeno, the love for the remainder of your life, You'd kissed him, held hands with him, and cherished him. He snuggled his head in the crook of your neck, kissed your chapped lips gently, and introduced you to the rest of his close friends.
You were okay with dying now. Things would be okay. He'd be okay.
"You know, Jeno," You sighed and leaned back on your elbows, "you ask me that question a lot. And I must admit, I've lied to you the first two times. I was scared. I didn't want to die. I wanted to live and soar and graduate college and have kids and a dog with an ungodly green lawn that would make my neighbors mad. But now," You nodded, squeezing his hand. "I'm okay with it. I don't want to die -- but I'm okay with it. I've lived a dream. I've kissed you and petted dogs, gotten bitten by cats, snuck out, and thrown tantrums. I'm okay now. And I know you'll be okay with out me."
A sob left him, and he took a deep breath in. You accepting death was a bittersweet medicine to him. He wanted you to say with vigor that you'd live with him, that you'd be okay, that he'd see you on the opposite of a wedding aisle from him. But the calmness of your voice, the gentle understanding, the happiness -- it all made him realize that you were okay, It'd be okay. He'd be okay.
But he still wished for a miracle. He'd pray to any god for it to happen.
-
There was no miracle. You died a month later in the same bed you'd met Jeno in. The light in your room went out again, and you'd been moved to a different one temporarily, and died there.
The funeral was simple, too simple for Jeno's tastes, but perfect for yours. You wanted your death to be quick, your funeral to be quick, and your burial to be quick. You just wanted people to move on after your death. You wanted them to go back to smiling and laughing and dancing and kissing and living. But Jeno could never move on that quickly from the enigma that was you.
He wished there were more to say. But that was it. That was the end of you. It had all happened so quickly, everyone seemed to move on so quickly. Your life had been so long in comparison to your death. You death had been so gray in comparison to your colorful self. Jeno was left with his memories. Left with his sorrow. Left with sitting at the bench he'd first asked you if you were afraid to die at.
Jeno was left behind. He was alone.
But every time he sat down on the dirty wooden slabs, he felt a sense of peace. It was as if someone was holding his hand and gazing up at the sky with him. It was as if everything was okay. As if nothing was wrong.
Jeno remembers the way your lips felt on his, the way your weak grip made his heart race, he remembers the way you'd lived. He remembers your casual relationship with the hospital staff, he remembers your favorite soup, your favorite band, he remembers it all. His memories of you were tangible -- he could almost touch them. He could relive those moments with you anytime he wanted. He memories were infinite, his memories always felt more vivid on that bench.
Jeno knows you weren’t afraid to die when you did. Jeno remembers you. Jeno misses you. Jeno loves you. And he always will. 
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hawkinsindiana · 5 years ago
Text
i should go
ALMOST PARADISE: PART TWO - CHAPTER FOURTEEN OF FIFTEEN
pairing: steve harrington x henderson!reader
word count: 2.5k
a/n: these are scary and confusing times. so here ya go. i hope everyone’s staying safe and healthy, i love you all <3
masterlist
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You don’t know why you thought things were going to get better. You should’ve known better; you’ve never been able to catch a break, even before all of this happened.
The dreams have been getting worse, and more frequent; now, they’re about the kids too. You’ll be back in those tunnels, the ones crawling with vines, and their voices will bounce against the walls. They’re calling out, desperately crying for you to help them, but they’re never found. 
It feels like you run in circles for hours on end, throat going hoarse from screaming their names until you wake, pebbles of sweat dripping from your brow and body frozen in terror. 
Those seem to scare you more - the ones about them. Because it’s your duty to protect them, and you’ve come so close to failing so many times. 
Those ones never let you sleep; you’re left to lie there until morning, fear bubbling inside that something’s happened while you were asleep, thinking they’re gone now and there’s nothing you could’ve done.
Your brother hears it every time. When your careful footsteps approach his door at those ungodly hours, and the door creaks open just a touch so you can quiet your restless mind; Dustin’s always there, safe and sound underneath the sheets, Tews tucked against his feet.
You’ve done that six times now - he figures he should ask what that’s about. Maybe he’ll bring it up to Steve, see if the older boy knows anything. 
But with the town buzzing with holiday cheer, they’ve barely seen you around. Extra shifts at Radio Shack have filled your schedule as the people of Hawkins flock downtown for gifts, especially now that Bob’s no longer there for his usual hours. 
Dustin thinks you should take a break while you’re off from school. He can tell that it’s exhausting when you come home and don’t have the energy to return Steve’s call, but you always have the same answer:
“I need to keep myself busy anyways.”
And Steve - he understands the circumstances. But that doesn’t make it hurt less when Dustin has to deflect and apologize on your behalf.
God, you hope it’s not too much on him-
Your mother snaps you from your trance, tapping the phone against your arm before placing it in your hand, “It’s for you.”
You hadn’t even heard it ring. You don’t know how long you’ve been standing here, shoulder pressed to the wall and eyes focused on the evening news.
You answer it with a sigh, “Yeah?” A perky voice flows easily through the receiver, unfazed by your delivery.
“Hey, it’s Stacy, from the dance committee? We’ve got an emergency over here.”
Mike and Lucas thought it might be a good idea for you to help organize and plan the Snow Ball. Since the group of middle schoolers would be attending this year, they wanted your help to ensure that it was the best one thrown yet. You weren’t so keen on the idea, until you remembered how lame it was a few years back when you went.
“I don’t have to come down there, do I? I thought we took care of everything last night.”
The girl nervously laughs on the other end; you can hear the music from the gym echoing in the room. It almost makes it hard to listen.
“Turns out we need three more bottles of soda. Simon only got five. Since you’re the only one with a car-”
“Yeah, of course,” You interrupt, “I’ll grab some and bring it over. Be there in a jif.”
After ending the call, you grab your cash off the counter on your way to the bathroom. 
“Hey Dustin, I gotta bolt. Can you find-” 
You’re greeted with the sight of your brother, putting the finishing touches on his look for the night - a can of Farrah Fawcett hairspray in one hand. You can’t help the laugh that bursts from you. 
“What, Mom buy you that?”
His head snaps to you in an instant, cheeks turning bright red as you lean your weight against the doorframe. The product’s out of sight immediately afterwards, quickly shoved behind his back, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
Dustin swallows harshly at your squinting eyes, arms folding over your chest as you study him. You decide not to ask.
“Uh huh.”
A few tense, silent moments pass as he waits for you to comment further; he hates that smirk on your face, “Did you, uh, need something?”
You clear your throat, shifting on your feet before replying, “Yeah I gotta get to the school now, can you find another ride? Maybe Mrs. Wheeler can come take you?”
Dustin’s expression grows confused, “What are you talking about? I already have a ride.”
Your brow raises in surprise, “You do.”
He shrugs, “Yeah, Steve’s takin’ me.”
And then it clicks; your grin grows. 
“Oh… okay. I’ll see you afterwards then,” You go to grab the door on your way out, but not before adding something else with a wink.
“Don’t worry,” You say, “I won’t tell anyone. And keep this open a touch, yeah? I’d hate for you to suffocate on the fumes.”
The gym’s loud and filled with prepubescent teenagers. You can’t wait to get out of here, back to the comforting security of your home.
That feeling intensifies when you lock eyes with who’s standing behind the punch bowl; you already feel yourself retracting inwards before a conversation even begins.
“I didn’t realize you were coming tonight,” Nancy speaks first, letting a small smile spread over her face as you approach the beverage station. 
She seems so much lighter, so much happier since you last saw her. You’re glad that she’s been able to finally move on, even if it is at Steve’s expense. Nobody deserves to be trapped in a relationship they don’t want to be in; you can’t blame her for that. You just wish it hadn’t happened the way it did.
“Oh, I’m not,” You answer, gesturing to the liters of soda you carry in your arms; they’ve started to grow tired from the weight, “I’m just dropping these off.”
Nancy’s expression drops a touch as you place the bottles on the bleachers behind her, “I figured you’d be bringing your brother.”
You brush the condensation off onto your jeans, “No, uh, Steve did that already.”
Confusion is evident as she grows speechless, turning back to face you; the expression she has on her face is enough to explain her emotions - that doesn’t seem like something he’d do.
You laugh at her, “Yeah, I know. Trust me, no one’s more shocked than I am.”
Nancy shakes her head in awe as your back straightens, and she chews on her lip as she debates bringing it up. She decides to.
“Remember when we came to this thing?”
Your eyes move to see her, leaning back against the table, knuckles turning white as she grips the edge. A scoff escapes your mouth as you nod, “How could I forget? Jimmy Hawthorne spilled punch all over my dress twenty minutes in.”
Nancy laughs at the memory, remembering the priceless look on his face as you threatened him, right in the middle of the dance floor, “God, it took my mom all night to get that stain out.”
The silence between you that follows her comment isn’t… uncomfortable. If anything, it’s another step in the right direction. But you still chose to retreat; it’s almost too much, seeing her look at you like that again.
“I guess I’ll see you around, Nance,” You mutter before moving past her, jingling the car keys in between your fingers. All she musters back in response is a wave as she’s swarmed by an incoming gaggle of girls.
The cold air invigorates you as you exit the school building; you don’t know how much longer you could’ve been cooped up in there, surrounded by all the memories. And as you’re making your way to your mother’s car, that’s when you spot him.
“What the hell are you doin’ here?” You raise your voice while you approach, arms crossing over your chest. Steve’s attention is brought up to see you, walking across the parking lot, a lazy smile growing over your rosy cheeks.
“I could ask you the same thing, Henderson,” The corner of Steve’s mouth quirks up as your brow raises at his response, “I asked you first.”
He sighs before running the hem of his sweater between his fingers, “Oh, I figured I should stick around just in case. You never know...”
You snort lightly after Steve allows his sentence to trail off, “Jesus, you’re starting to sound like me. I’m supposed to be the protective one.”
“There are worse things to be,” Steve’s focus is gentle as he watches you come to his side; he’s appreciating every single little detail about this moment. 
The snow is just right - there’s enough of it to create a picturesque scene around you. The muffled love ballads that echo from the school make him feel warm in his chest - he thinks about you when he hears them. The streetlights illuminate your face enough for him to notice when the bridge of your nose scrunches at his words, “Aw, I knew it.”
“Knew what?”
“The kids,” You nudge Steve before your gaze drifts to him; your heart skips when you catch him already peering your way, “They’re making you soft, Steven.”
Steve’s grin spreads wider as your laugh fills the space between, rolling his eyes as he falsely acts annoyed by your observation, “Great, just what I need.”
“Oh, also,” Your tone makes him meet your mischievous look, and it ignites a bit of anxiety in him, “Farrah Fawcett, really? You thought I wouldn’t figure that one out?”
Steve grows shocked by your deduction in record time, further spurring on your joy; it almost counter-balances his embarrassment.
“Relax, your secret’s safe with me,” You say, and Steve just shakes his head, “You and your brother are so dead if anyone finds out.”
You bring your fingers to your lips, faking to lock them before throwing the invisible key over your shoulder. And then it hits him - he hasn’t seen you since that night, after the funeral. That night where you almost kissed him.
”Why aren’t you in your car?” 
Your words catch him off guard, and he simply shrugs in response, “The snow’s nice, dontcha think?”
“I guess, but Christ, aren’t you cold?” You ask Steve as you shiver and pull your hooded sweatshirt tighter against your frame. 
He inhales before going to answer, but he decides that his words aren’t enough. His arm gets extended outwards before he gestures for you to move closer, “Come on, get over here.”
You feel your heart beat in your throat as a misty breath expels itself from you and into the night sky. It’s almost like the air gets thicker the closer you get to Steve, but you can’t stop yourself from tucking your body into his side. 
His arm drapes heavily over your shoulder as soon as you’ve settled, and you decide to pull him closer with the limb that would’ve gotten trapped between you. Steve emits a light laugh at the feeling of your arm wrapping around his middle, tugging him in further; you both relish in the heat that emanates from the other.
A few silent moments pass - neither of you has the courage to comment, even though both of your minds are running wild with what to say. 
Steve shifts beside you, adjusting his feet against the parking lot pavement. The action prompts you to spin your focus in his direction and you freeze as he does the same - his eyes landing on your gentle expression.
Seeing Steve look at you like that makes you feel like you’re floating - the admiration in his eyes is enough to silence any doubts you had about… well, whatever this is. Your heart thuds against your ribs when he somehow inches even closer and you tighten your hold on him after he does so, hand curling around the material of his sweater. 
You want to pull your gaze away from him, because fuck it’s getting to be too much; the way he feels by you side, the way you slid into him to protect yourself from the chilly December evening, the way that neither of you can find any words to describe how you’re feeling.
But then it clicks inside your brains. And maybe, you think, nothing needs to be said at all.
You lean in first, and it doesn’t take Steve much longer to react and do the same. He grows surprised when you pause, mere millimeters away from meeting your lips, brow creasing as your nose brushes his.
Even though you’ve been craving this very moment for about a year, you can’t shake the thought that hovers like a cloud over your psyche. This changes everything. There’s no going back if you continue down this road - it almost makes you afraid, no matter how much you’ve wanted things to be different.
It dissipates quickly, as Steve doesn’t give you much time to ponder; he takes the leap. His lips are pressed to yours. And it’s just like the first time you fell for him - every doubt you’ve ever had about Steve vanishes instantly. 
The kiss is so soft and so filled with emotion that you feel like you could cry. His presence is overwhelming your senses and you melt against his palm that slides up your jaw, past where the bruises faded. 
You can’t process when your fingers begin to card through his hair, pulling him closer to you because you’re desperate to let him feel everything that’s been churning inside for over a year. You’re still so in love with him that when he finally pulls away, you feel like he took a piece of you with him.
The music starts to fade and your little bubble along with it; you struggle to find something to say. 
You don’t know how long you’ve waited to be able to do that. None of your daydreams could have ever compared to this; you’re almost lost in the moment. All of that heartache, all of that pain - it’s finally been released.
Neither of you knows what to do.
But then Steve clears his throat, his thoughts jumbled inside his head because holy shit - he wasn’t expecting it to feel like that. 
The silence afterwards is deafening. Your breaths fan against the other’s rose tinted cheeks, still barely inches apart. 
“I should uh,” You mutter, fingers trailing down his arms, slowly pulling yourself away from his warmth. You’re suddenly overwhelmed with far too many emotions, all of which you can’t even begin to decipher while standing here in front of him. 
Steve grips your hands in his as you lean back; he knows what you’re going to say, but God, he wishes that you didn’t have to.
“I should go,” You finish. It shatters his heart a bit to hear you say it, but he only nods. 
“Yeah,” He manages, “I’m sure your mom wants you back.”
You swallow harshly before your touch leaves him completely. Steve can still feel where your fingers were pressed on his palms - it lingers as you turn to leave, and begin your walk to your car.
taglist: @stevebabey / @mrs-skywalker / @hannarudick / @crazycookiecrumbles / @hellisateenageheather / @alewifex / @l0ve-0f-my-life / @naomiiiiiiiiiii04 / @daddystevee / @thecaptainsgingersnap / @let-the-imaginationflow / @asianravenpuff / @im-a-stranger-thing​ / @mikariell95​ / @pilunb​ / @harringtherin​ / @royalestrellas​ / @ultrunning​ / @buggs177 / @poutfull​ / @yoheyyosup​ / @duchessdaisybat​ / @janieavalos / @sassisaluxury​ / @beththebubbly​ / @i-bitch-you-bitch​ / @captainstilinskis​ / @juliebean247​ / @im-nada / @whatabeautifulsurrender​ / @rexorangecouny​ / @pass-me-jeez-it / @ahoy-scoops-troop / @halefirewarrior​ / @jointhehunt67 / @wallacetdog​ / @ketchuplukehemmo​ / @m-a-r-i-n-t-p / @fangirl485 / @emmegirl827 / @lookalivesunshine-x​ / @elite4cekalyma​ / @marjoherbo​ / @just-my-fandom / @idumpyourgrass​ / @alafolieee​ / @mochminnie​ / @phantomalchemist​ / @dustyblueboo​ / @alonewolfsblog​ / @ggclarissa​ / @hufflepuffing-all-day-long​ / @bippityboppitybabe​
if you wanna be added to the taglist, just lemme know!
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smol-and-grumpy · 5 years ago
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Sky Full Of Stars - CH02
Sequel to Something Just Like This
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader
Summary: He’s Dean Winchester, ex mobster boss, still a little cocky, less ruthless and not at all short tempered anymore. Instead, he thinks he’s hilarious (she doesn’t agree, though). They both try to live a quiet life. And Dean hopes, very hard, that his former life won’t come knocking at their door.
Warnings: Really fluffy. 
WC: 3109
SERIES MASTERLIST
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Dean tries to be quiet, he really did, but as old houses are, the stairs creak underneath his weight when he descends. He flinches, squints his eyes and moves faster, trying his best to make himself feather light, and absolutely fails.
He hops off the last step, walks into the kitchen on his bare feet, makes a cup of coffee. He knows that he needs to get back to work when he wants to finish the house on time but Y/N’s so damn distracting.
Especially when she takes naps during the day because she’s more tired than she’s ever been. In fact, she’s even more tired now than when she was in her first Trimester, which is weird but what does he know, he doesn’t have to deal with the hormones so all he does is shut the hell up and let her sleep.
They’re only at half time, something over five months.
When she feels really tired, she likes to take baths to relax and then taking naps after, and Dean hates that. Absolutely super hates it. Can’t stand how he can’t help but join her. Not always with the baths but certainly with the naps.
It first started two months into her pregnancy when they were still painting her art room. She would start to paint and after a couple of hours she’d ask him if it was okay for her to go lie down. When he checked on her later, she was grinning at him from inside of the bathtub with foam all over her face. 
That first time that he discovered her in the tub when she was supposed to go lie down, he couldn’t help but jump right into the tub with her, sat her on his hard cock and let her fuck herself on him. He took her out and laid her down after, ate her out before her body was even dry. 
Their sex life was not boring by all means, but since she’s pregnant she became insatiable. 
Dean would lie if he said that he minded it. 
And if he can’t fuck her with his cock (honestly, she can really wear him out), he fucks her with his fingers (sometimes he thinks that carpal tunnel syndrome is on his horizon), and if his fingers and hands get tired, he eats her out until his jaw cramps up. Like he said, he doesn’t mind. It’s not like they’re going about it like rabbits. They don’t do it every day either but once she starts, it’s hard for her to stop.
So since then, she’s been taking naps and he naps with her. It’s tempting to just stay in bed all day, kissing, cuddling, making love, sleep. And if she wasn’t pregnant and they wouldn’t expect a little baby in roughly five months time, he wouldn’t even care about the house, but Dean needs to get things going if he wants to finish it. 
Sometimes, Sam comes around to help. Jess’s pregnant too. Is even ahead of Y/N by a month. So whenever Sam’s over, Dean would drink a beer with his brother and they exchange their thoughts and worries. Dean’s gotten much better at talking nowadays. 
Bobby showed up once too, and Gabe whenever he’s free and then Gabe would help Dean out. He gets so much done when Gabe’s here. It’s the ease of having worked together for so many years that makes a difference to Gabe and Sam. Also Gabe is no fucking pain in Dean’s ass like Sammy is. 
But most of the time, they’re on their own in their little house with a view to a sky full of stars. It’s never dull around here either. She’d find ways to get on his nerves and he might not even do it on purpose but he apparently can annoy the fuck out of her as well. Dean apparently talks too loud. Or he chews too loud. Or brushes his teeth too loud. Every little thing can be too loud. The hormones are fucking with her senses.
He drinks his coffee, it’s caffeinated. He once tried to sneak in decaf coffee but she just sat there and stared at the mug and started to cry. So he gave up on it, because she limits her intake. She already had one this morning so Dean gulps down his, burning his tongue off, but it’s better for her not to see him drink it. It’s also better for him. 
While he’s standing in the kitchen, he decides to make lunch. Cooks up some pasta with homemade sauce and he’ll chop up some veggies to throw it in with.
Dean’s chopping away at a bell pepper when he feels arms coming around his middle, her face pressing into his spine, right in between his shoulder blades. 
“Mmh,” Y/N mumbles into his back, he feels her voice vibrating along his spine. Her little bump’s pressed into his lower back. “Smells good.”
Dean grins, but doesn’t stop chopping, “Me or the food?”
“Food.” She says and he can feel her chuckle on his back.
“Not me?” 
Her hands brush along his stomach, feathery strokes travel down to the waistband of his sweats, and then she strokes along his clothed cock. Dean holds in his breath. “Baby, I’m chopping something here.”
He abandons the knife though, because he’s not dumb and is not risking chopping his own hand off when she palms him through his pants.
“You always smell good, that’s not fair.” 
It’s Dean's turn to grin. He takes her hand from his cock — that grows hard just from her touching it and it's still the same, he can’t not get hard when he’s around her — and turns around, picks her up and sits her on the kitchen island on the other side of the stove.
She’s pouting, just like he thought she would be. 
He stands between her legs, his hands on her thigh and around the small of her back as he looks up to meet her eyes, cranes his neck to kiss her pout away. 
She wraps her hands around his neck and Dean likes how she plays with the short hair there. 
“What are you cooking?” Y/N asks and nuzzles her nose against his chin.
“I’m making pasta.”
Her hand comes around his face, fingers scratching at his scruff and then she says, “I was thinking—”
“—No,” It came out of Dean a little too fast, can’t help it because he knows what she’s going to say. 
He knows her better than he knows himself, he told her once and it’s still true. He knows that she’s pregnant and has cravings and she really almost never wants to eat the thing he cooks her. Even though she’s okay with it first but then she changes her mind, wants something else and after she takes a couple of bites of said something else, she changes her mind again. It’s driving him fucking crazy is what it is.
The old Dean might have been mad, might tell her to fucking make up her mind but the new Dean is taking everything in with patience and an easiness he never knew he had. The only thing that really annoys the living hell out of  him is that she mostly has cravings for things they don’t have in the house and he would have to go to the store to get it. But that’s on him too, because he doesn’t want her to drive in his car with no real seatbelt. She would then argue that they still have her car which is parked in the garage but they haven’t used it for a while and Dean doesn’t even know if it would still start up because unlike the time when she was gone for the year where Dean would take her car for a spin every other week to make sure it’s still running smoothly, he didn’t have the time nor desire to take her car for a spin since they moved, and however, that’s not really the point anyway. The point being, he doesn’t want her to drive at all, because he’s still scared of what could happen if she gets into another accident.
He bought a new car already, thinks of ditching his Baby every time he has to take his family out and about, opted for a big family van but it’s custom made and it takes another couple of weeks to be delivered.
“Hey, you don’t even know what I wanted to say.”
“Baby, I’m making pasta. I’m not going to the store again for your cravings. I’ve been twice this morning already and one time late last night.” Dean says, and it’s true. Last night she wanted her coconut ice cream and when he brought it back, she realized that her hormones made her not like the taste of coconut anymore and she ended up crying. That was a night ruined and Dean wished he didn’t even go out at all.
The next store is twenty minutes out and if Dean gives in every time she craves something, he will never get anything done around here. 
Y/N swats at his chest, but her lips curve into a playful smile, “‘M not telling that you should go to the store.” She leans forward then, pulls him closer by the back of his neck and he wraps his arms around her.
“Then tell me, I’m listening.”
“What would you say if I tell you to go out for a couple of hours in the evening.” She mumbles into the crook of his neck and that’s when Dean knows that she’s scared that he’ll be mad because she’s not able to look him in the eye.
He frowns a little, “Why do you want me to go out?” She hugs him tighter and that’s when he adds, “Am I crushing you? Do you need space?”
“No, everything’s okay. I just want to do something and I need you out of the house for a couple of hours. Cas will come pick you up.”
Dean frowns some more, “So, you actually already decided for me.”
She comes out of her hiding and is looking at him, a smile so bright it makes his heart leap. “Yes.”
He rolls his eyes, but only for the dramatic effect. “Okay, but don’t do anything stupid, alright?”
“Me? Something stupid?” She gasps with one hand on her chest, “Never!”
Dean begs to differ. There’s one time she drew a bath and forgot about it. They needed to exchange the flooring of the bathroom after. Or that time when she burned the omelettes because she was distracted by her book. Or that time when she came back from the store and placed the milk in the freezer and ice creams in the fridge. The list goes on and on, but Dean rather not list them off, because he couldn’t win the argument. 
She once said that she can’t even take care of herself and while that might not be true while she wasn’t pregnant, he thinks it’s true now. It if wasn’t for him, she would have flooded and burned the house to the ground by now.
“Liar,” He only grins at her, kisses her then before she can say anything else. 
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Y/N’s sitting on the couch and strokes Bubbles while Truffles is lying on the floor when Dean comes down from taking a shower, she can hear him walking down the stairs, it creaks awfully loud under his weight. He told her that he wants to work on that too, so the baby wouldn’t wake up all the time when he’s going up and down the stairs.
Bubbles loves its new home, the cat especially loves the space, loves going out and roaming around, and has already made friends with other cats and of course Bubbles doesn’t mind Truffles at all, would sometimes let the dog lick her and the feeling is mutual.
She’s actually glad Dean agreed on getting a dog. She never knew that he would cave because he told her that he’s not really a dog person. Come to think of it, he’s also not really a cat person. He’s not really any kind of person except of her, he said that himself. Now he has to share her with a baby and he’s slowly working up to it. It’s not going to be easy but that little one will also be half his so she guesses that Dean will be able to work on his issue. That issue still being that he’s afraid someone could take her away from him. 
Dean is working on himself, she can see that. Sees it in how he’s much more relaxed and she likes that. Likes how he wakes up with a smile on his face everyday. Likes, how he smiles more in general, how he’s less grumpy. How he doesn’t have to work all night and come home with bloody shirts. 
Nowadays, the only stains on his shirts and pants are from renovating the house or pottery.
Yeah. Pottery.
They are sharing an art room now. He’s doing pottery in one corner of the art room. It’s one of Bobby’s friends, Rufus, who’s also Dean’s friend and a closet psychologist who suggested that Dean tries pottery to help calm him down when the storm inside of him takes over. 
Sometimes, Dean would come in when she’s painting, sits down wordlessly and starts to do pottery. She won’t say a word either. Will sit there and paint until she can see the crease between his eyebrows even out.
He’s so distracting when he does pottery, though. His fingers and arms work on the clay. Sexy is what it is. It gets her hot and bothered every time.
Dean walks into the living room, dressed in casual jeans and a plaid shirt, smelling good and the scent makes her light headed. 
Just when he bends down to kiss her, Cas rings at the gate. That’s right, they have a gate. Dean’s overprotective but she understands, considering who he was when she met him.
He pecks her nose, her forehead, places his hand on her belly and rubs at it. “I think that’s my date.”
“You have fun,” She breathes into the kiss and feels his lips widen into a grin.
“Fun? Without you?” 
She rolls her eyes, “You know what I mean.”
Dean leans lower, kisses her belly through the shirt. “Be good,”
She frowns a little, “The baby or me?”
“Both.” Dean boops her nose and gets up, walks to the door and is out.
*
After Dean has left, she takes a long shower, gets into fresh comfortable clothes and starts to prepare everything she needs. 
It’s going to be a surprise. Dean has always done so much for her. He always makes sure that she has everything she needs, and has devoted his life to keep her happy so that she would stay, so that he could keep her. Even though she told him that there’s really nothing that would drive her away from him anymore. Guess he still doesn’t believe it so he does the only thing he knows he can, twists and bends his life around to make room for her in it. To make room for their family.
She orders pizza, places mats on their terrace, sets up fairy lights. She actually wanted to use candles but Dean hid all of them because he doesn’t trust her to not burn the house down.
Two hours has passed and Dean should be home in a couple of minutes. She has an agreement with Cas to get him home as sober as possible. 
Y/N moves pillows and blankets from the couch out to the little camping site she created. The pizza arrived a couple of minutes ago either, so she takes it out with her. She’s hungry and takes a bite out of a slice, hoping Dean doesn’t mind that she started without him.
Like she thought, Dean walks in after she has finished her first slice, and he calls out for her. The house is dark, the only light source is out here and she hopes he gets it, follows the source out to where she is waiting for him.
“Babe?” He slips out onto the terrace, slides the screen door shut behind him.
His face is lit up by the moonlight and the little fairy lights. She sees him smile, it’s all white and wide. 
“Surprise,” She smiles back at him.
She waits for him to get out of his shoes and join her on the mat beside her. He places his hand on her shoulder, the tips of his thumb circles on the back of her neck as he pulls her in to kiss her temple. “Is that why you wanted me to go out?”
“Duh,” She grins and he kisses the grin away.
They dig into the pizza and she knows that she forgot something, so Dean has to get up and comes back out with napkins and two bottles of water.
After they ate, they lay down, his head on her shoulder, while he rubs at her tummy.
“You see the stars?” 
“Yeah,” She whispers.
“Thank you,”
“No, I have to thank you.” She says, tilts her head, kisses his temple, his scruff tickles her chin. “You’ve done so much for me so at least I can do something too, even if it’s just something small.”
“It’s something big, alright,” Dean cranes his neck, kisses her cheek, leaves his lips here, “You’re doing more for me than you know,” He’s about to say more but there’s something happening in her tummy, something that feels like gas bubbles that are locked in there. Like she’s had too much fizzy drink, only that she had none. She felt it a couple of times already but it’s the first time that he probably feels it too with his palm on her stomach.
Dean swallows.
“Is that?” He props himself up on his elbow, leans over her, and there’s one more bubbly feeling.
She smiles at him, nods her head and his smile spreads on his face, the crinkles around his eyes deepens. Y/N cradles his face with one hand, letting the pad of her thumb travel over the crinkles that she loves so much.
Dean kisses her then, still smiling and chuckling. 
“The baby’s probably excited to see the stars too.” She whispers into the kiss, wonders how long it’ll take for them to feel a real kick, for Dean to feel it.
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CH03
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Text
Seahorse (Spencer Reid x Trans Male!Reader) SFW
Summary: Spencer and Y/N have always wanted kids. Here’s the time Spencer was brave enough to broach the subject of how they would go about it. Plus a few more times after that.
AN: @imagining-in-the-margins​ came up with the idea of Spencer’s trans bf having a baby amidst man many many prompts for Spencer x male!reader to indulge my daydreaming and I ran with this prompt.
Thank you to @writing-in-april​ for being my beta on this one! Couldn’t have done it without you, beebs <3
This is the SFW version. Here’s a link to an NSFW version of the story, but do not read that if you are under 18!
Word Count: 5.7k words
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Content Warnings: Trans man is pregnant, coming off medication, allusions to Prison!Spencer.
Masterlist // Gif Credit // NSFW Version
The halls echoed with the unbridled joy of little ones calling out “Nemo” and “Dory” at the sight of the clown and surgeon fishes. Spencer bounced on the balls of his feet as he looked around the next room in search of his goal. He stopped when Y/N spared a look in his direction, away from the tank that had captured his attention for a solid five minutes.
“JJ sent me a video of a shrimp solving a Rubik’s Cube the other day.” He grinned.
Ah yes. JJ had also sent Spencer a video of little Henry swinging a mini softball bat about just like Spencer had done. For one game and one game only he had insisted, despite Y/N’s own resolve that he looked hot in the kit.
The walk through the tunnel was the slowest slog Spencer felt, but it was the only attraction in the aquarium to properly distract him. Lights above them filtered through the water, bouncing off the painted walls of the tank in a blue glow. Various species in a perfectly balanced ecosystem swam around one another without a care in the world. A particular stingray flapped its body against the glass, and three children nearby laughed at its funny shaped mouth.
“I used to sit on my mum’s shoulders when we walked through these. Touch the ceiling as if I could pet the fishes.” And Y/N’s hands stretched up over him, his eyes following a shark that slinked overhead, “When I got too old, I’d just press my nose against the glass and stare back.”
Nerves returned at the sight of a circular tank in the centre of the room holding something familiar. Seahorses curled their tails around the plants that waved together like a crowd at a concert. Little babies bobbed about the parents, translucent and wriggly.
Spencer coughed and spoke while Y/N took in the creatures, “Did you know that the seahorse is the only animal where the male carries the children?”
Suddenly his throat was dry; the words he’d been rehearsing dragged to a halt. Y/N turned to face him properly, guiding Spencer to the left as a little girl stood on tiptoe to see the seahorses as he continued to struggle.
“Well, that might not be true actually.” Spencer choked a little on his words, his voice’s volume steadily declining into a soft whisper, “I know that some human men can have babies.”
Y/N’s face clouded with doubt for a moment. Then it clicked and his face cleared, “Spencer, tell me what you’re getting at.”
Spencer twisted his hands around one another, “Have you ever thought about us having kids… biologically?” He watched Y/N’s Adam’s apple dip as he swallowed hard
“You mean like me being pregnant?”
“Yes, have you considered it an option for us?”
The conversations of other aquarium patrons were forgotten as Y/N took his gaze away from Spencer. His eyebrows were low as he considered his words carefully. Y/N always thought about the implications of what he was saying, maybe a little too much. Spencer could be biased though; his impatience did not mix well with his anxieties.
Eventually, Y/N turned back with a brave face and said, “I’d have to think about it some more.”
“Ok.” Spencer nodded, his chin wobbling a little.
There was hope though: he needed to think “some more”. Implying Y/N had thought about this before.
Near the end of their trip, Spencer did find himself in a staring contest with a little seahorse plushie with large eyes and an anatomically inaccurate tongue hanging out. In all honesty, it was kind of ugly.
“Spencer, come on. You know how I get around stuffed animals.”
How empathetic his boyfriend really was, projecting feelings of love onto the inanimate objects then making the excuse that he had to buy it now.
Spencer did have to leave the toy behind though. Out into the sunlight of the parking lot, he winced before he put his sunglasses back on.
“Park?” Y/N offered his hand and smiled. It was an olive branch, something to say that Spencer’s query had not ruined their day out together.
Spencer accepted and squeezed his hand. “Park.”
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
Standing in front of the bathroom mirror, Y/N had a hand on their lower belly, some space between the fingers as if there was an invisible bump there to accommodate. His head had tilted while he thumbed over the air.
As drowsy as Spencer was from work, his mind was focused without a distraction on what he had seen through the ajar bathroom door. He could barely pay attention to the Doctor Who episode Y/N put on. In fact, he doubted anything could take his attention away from the idea of having a child with-
“What do you think about me being pregnant?”
Spencer’s eyes shot wide open, then they were covered slightly by his inquisitive eyebrows in his attempt find an answer. Especially with Y/N looking on him while he waited for him.
“I think you’d be so beautiful carrying our baby. But if you wouldn’t be comfortable, then I wouldn’t make you. We still have surrogacy, fostering, adoption to consider,” was his answer. Never a lie, but the truth was always softened.
Seemingly satisfied, Y/N looked back at the episode. But Spencer couldn’t wait anymore, forgetting about anything else in the world except for this.
“What do you think, Y/N?” His body leant in towards his boyfriend’s.
Squirming in their spot on the couch, Y/N hummed before he answered, “I froze some of my eggs before I started my transition. I also sold some, for a down payment on a house or my wedding.”
Spencer’s heart thrilled at the possibilities. A house together? Matching suits at their wedding? He almost neglected to think about the fact that pregnancy was suddenly a very viable option for their future.
Regardless of Spencer’s many, many thoughts, Y/N continued, “And I thought that perhaps, if I found the right person, I would like to carry their child.” His palm opened up to him and Spencer instantly took it. “I know you’re the right person, but I’m not sure I want a baby now.”
“Of course,” Spencer lifted Y/N’s hand to his lips, “Whenever we’re both ready.”
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
Spencer pushed the dirty bedsheets into the washing machine; it wasn’t that big a deal. If the blood didn’t come out, then they could always buy a new set. Although they should really be saving money for decorating the nursery.
“Spenceerrrr.”
As the machine rumbled into life, Spencer returned to Y/N, curled up on the sofa with a heat pad to his gut. No amount of warnings from their doctor could have prepared Spencer for how emotionally straining it was to see his boyfriend suffering. Y/N was taking this a lot harder than Spencer – and rightfully so, it was his body that was changing.
“Why did I have to have such strong paternal instincts?” He grumbled with his eyes still closed.
Spencer let out a laugh, but it was cut off quick when Y/N whimpered loudly. He knelt down before him and cupped his face. Y/N’s cheeks were warm; his hands clung to Spencer’s wrists like a lifeline.
“What do you need?” Spencer asked softly and Y/N sighed, keening into his cooler palms.
“Can you tell me I’m handsome please?”
“You are the most handsome man in the world, and I adore you every minute of every day.” Spencer kissed Y/N’s pouting lips gently, “Handsome inside and out, I never wanna think about life without you. You just make everything in my life better.”
His fingers moved to brush away a tear that slipped down Y/N’s face and over the ridge of his nose. But he missed and it dripped onto the pillow.
“You’re doing so much for us, for our baby.”
“It’s not even real yet,” Y/N sniffled. His hands finally released Spencer and pressed the heat pad into him.
“It’s gonna be.” Spencer bumped their noses together, “We’re gonna be dads.”
A hoarse laugh met with a hint of a groan in Y/N’s chest, “Yeah. We’re gonna be dads.” That sound and those words were all Spencer needed to feel better. But he wished the same could be said for Y/N. The only thing he could provide was a promise of future relief:
“How about we order in tonight?”
“Ugh, yes.” Y/N burrowed his face into the pillow.
When their bed was made up properly, Spencer and Y/N cuddled together. Unfortunately, Y/N was restless, trying to find a comfortable position while his painkillers kicked in. Spencer kept his complaints to himself, allowing himself to be shifted around in Y/N’s hunt for relief. Honestly it was the least he could do.
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
“The reproductive process begins when a male and a female seahorse do daily pre-dawn dances, intertwining their tails and swimming together.”
“Well, it’s nearly nine, so definitely past dawn.”
“I’m trying to be romantic, Y/N.”
Y/N adjusted the bed sheets around his middle, “We don’t have tails either and - if I remember correctly - your last sexy swimming encounter ended poorly.”
Spencer flushed at the memory of Lila in the pool; another memory turned the pink to red. Y/N had laughed so hard his gut ached when Spencer told him about how awkward he had been around Lila. This was before the context of the case had been disclosed, promptly removing the space for any more laughter.
“Baby?”
Y/N was touching his face. Spencer’s head emptied itself of all thoughts of Lila. This was not what he wanted to be thinking about right now. Y/N’s laughter maybe, but none of the rest.
Tucking a curl behind his ear, Y/N leant in close, “If I’m ready, and you’re ready, you know what happens.” His eyes wandered down Spencer’s face, “And it’s not swimming together.”
But, just as their lips were about to touch, Y/N jerked away from him. “Wait, I gotta brush my teeth first.”
Spencer moaned with indignation while falling backwards onto the bed as Y/N disappeared from view. A few seconds later, he heard the electric toothbrush buzzing. With a burst of energy, he stripped himself down to his underwear – a petty way to get back at Y/N who had made it very clear that undressing Spencer was one of his favourite parts of their sex life.
When Y/N returned, with the minty freshness he apparently desired more than his own boyfriend, he said “What? You already did this morning?”  His eyes looked down at Spencer’s chest and his lips twitched into a pout.
Spencer held back his grin, keeping his triumph at retaliation to himself as he said, “I wouldn’t have minded.”
“That’s the biggest lie I’ve ever heard, Spencer.”
And with that, Y/N crawled onto the bed, over Spencer’s body and kissed him silly. He did much more than that, enjoying their overlapping day off to the fullest before even leaving their home.
At ten to ten, sleepwear scattered about the bedroom floor, Spencer and Y/N sagged into the mattress, wrapped up in each other and the covers. The burning warmth of their bodies drew up two soporific smiles on their faces.
“You know, a seahorses’ body shape means that they’re inept swimmers, and they can actually die of exhaustion.”
Y/N poked Spencer’s sternum. “Is that your way of makin’ fun of my stamina? Give me a few minutes; I’ll be on you like a rash.”
Grinning at such a prospect, Spence continued, “They also mate for life monogamously.”
He felt two fingers touch his cheek, "Spencer, I love you and your endless fountain of knowledge.” Y/N paused to peck the corner of his lips, “But I’m not actually a seahorse. And, though I do plan to mate with you for life, if you wake me up before the sun is above the horizon for a ‘dance’, I'm gonna suffocate you with my new body pillow.”
“Oh, you got your pillow?”
“It’s en route.” Hence why Y/N was content to use Spencer in lieu of said pillow.
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
When Spencer disclosed to Hotch that he would need some time off because he and Y/N were considering having a kid, first thing on a Monday morning, Hotch didn’t let anything on. There was a hint of a hint of a smile though. His eye wandered to the school photo of Jack he kept on his desk, and he was greeted with the memory that Jack almost shared a name with Emily’s cat.
Naturally, Rossi found out next. Technophobe Spencer Reid had left his computer screen on a website for baby blankets, and Rossi had been the one to pass by first. After turning the monitor off, Rossi took Spencer aside in the break room and spoke about how wonderful it was that he was going to be a father. Then he kissed both his cheeks, leaving with misty eyes and a smile that he wouldn’t explain to Penelope passing by. Spencer blinked then finished making his coffee.
The next conference room meeting – the same day and just for an update on the paperwork deadline - Spencer simply decided to drop the information that he and Y/N were planning on having a kid as if it was his thoughts on their next unsub’s motivations were.
Three seconds of silence later and an uproar exploded.
From then on, the week was filled with pokes and ribbing at his upcoming parenthood. A peek into the future.
After making her a cup of coffee, Spencer sat opposite JJ at her desk and asked for advice. Her response: offering Spencer the opportunity to babysit Henry more. Obviously he accepted; more time with his godson was always a good thing. Then she went into how parenting was just a natural thing that he would know when the time came. Not very reassuring on its own, but with his best friend’s support, Spencer felt a smidgen better.
Penelope admitted that she had saved outfit ideas on Pinterest for Spencer – among other members of the BAU. When Spencer dared to enter her lair, she showed him several. Apparently that wasn’t even a dent in her collection, and she had already placed an order on a little bow tie. Spencer left before she tried to organise a shopping trip; neither Spencer nor Y/N were really fans of retail therapy.
Derek was teasing away, “Spencer and Y/N are gonna be baby daddies.” And every single time, Emily would join in. She liked to claim she was the reason Spencer was having a kid, reminding him of when JJ was pregnant. He had been incredibly weirded out by the baby kicking, but Emily had asked if he had considered having “baby geniuses” and he never gave an answer.
To be fair, Spencer never could have seen this coming. That made it all the better.
Apart from when Derek began supplying a realm of baby names, that varied from “oh that’s actually cute” to “oh my god, why would you even consider that a name for a real child?” Spencer was happy to rank them aloud for him.
The cat was only half out of the bag though.
Now Spencer had always been affectionate when he and Y/N were together. But the second it spilled into their public lifestyle, Y/N knew something was afoot. He was quick to pick up on this when he went to collect Spencer up for a chilled date night and Spencer kissed his cheek in clear view of the entire bullpen.
“You told them, didn’t you?”
“I couldn’t wait, but I do have my paternity leave arranged!”
The team swarmed to deliver their congratulations. And it was then that they revealed that they all thought that Spencer and Y/N were planning to adopt or look for a surrogate. Their embraces didn’t spoil the unexpected second part of their announcement; Y/N looked like he’d simply put on a few pounds rather than gained a baby bump beneath his button-up. Naturally, there was even more of a hubbub than before when they discovered that Y/N was already pregnant.
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
 “Spencer, baby, you gotta calm it with the ocean theme.”
“But…” he pouted, holding up the finished mobile. Brightly painted sea creatures and chunks of coral dangled delicately in a circle. Sure enough, there were orange seahorses hovering about their habitat.
“It’s very sweet and I adore you for it,” Y/N kissed Spencer. “Not everything has to be related to seahorses though.”
“I guess not.” Spencer’s defeated tone did not last long. His face brightened and he whipped a blanket adorned with little seahorses and bubbles at the edges out of the cot. “But - this online store was taking commissions, and you always say support small businesses!”
Thank god Y/N had been the one in charge of painting the walls. An underwater mural would have been a step too far.
“You, Doctor Spencer Reid, are so…” Y/N’s hands were up in the air between them, searching for an adjective to describe Spencer appropriately. Then he settled those hands on his shoulders and Y/N kissed him.
When they drew away, Spencer spoke, “I’m so what?”
Y/N shrugged, “Just so.” He kissed him again, lingering longer than before and smiling as Spencer’s hands touched the obtrusive roundness of his belly that pressed into Spencer’s stomach. They were so close to meeting their little bubba.
“So are you.”
“Ok, don’t have a go, I bought this before the ban,” Y/N held out a gift, wrapped in sea-green tissue paper and bearing a blue bow.
Folding the blanket neatly over the bars of the cot, Spencer eagerly yet daintily unwrapped the present. As the tissue paper fell to the carpet, his hands trembled.  Eyes shining, he couldn’t bring himself to look away from the latest scan that was framed by tiny seahorses to thank Y/N.
There was more still, as Y/N explained, “There’s another behind there. I’ve seen the state of the one in your wallet.”
“It got caught at the bottom of the pouch,” Spencer said quietly, unbending the catch on the back of the frame. Sure enough, two of the same photographs spilled into his waiting palm. Truth be told, Spencer had already taped his torn photo together again and it was going to stay in his wallet. This spare would be in the post soon, on its way over to his mother. God, she was so excited to hold a baby again. The photo album would have to do for now.
“Could you maybe recant the ocean ban? Because I saw this and I knew it would really go well with the blanket and the mobile.”
Sighing, Y/N’s head tilted back, “What is it?”
The pretence of annoyance couldn’t be maintained towards Spencer’s face beaming back at him as he held up a wonky looking seahorse plushie. It wasn’t the same one he’d seen before. Some heartfelt child had taken pity on that one and given it a forever home. No, this was a perfect little present for his bubba.
Y/N thought so too as he let a grin settle onto his face.
“Ok, we can keep this one. But no more from now, alright?”
“I suppose. Besides, our baby isn’t our seahorse. You are!”
“You better not buy us a fish tank for my birthday.” A spike of nerves hit Y/N when he couldn’t quite catch Spencer’s eye to confirm his word. “Spencer? Promise me... Spencer!”
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
 “How are you feeling, Baby Daddy?” Derek hugged Y/N who was reclined in his bed. His body pillow propped him up for his visitors.
Y/N wrinkled his nose, “For once, I wish I was a real seahorse and I could have just sneezed her out.”
Katia Nikola Reid definitely looked like she’d been sneezed on when she first entered the world, screaming her teaspoon-sized lungs out. Named after a hero of both Y/N and Spencer, one day old, bundled in a blanket, she scowled at Spencer’s dopey face looming over her while Emily held her tight.
A hoard of presents huddled in the corner of Spencer and Y/N’s bedroom. Emily thought it’d be a great idea to bring the baby an Ikea shark that was bigger than the child – and would definitely take up around half of her cot.
“She’s already got him wrapped around her pinky finger.”
“Yes, she does,” Spencer agreed giddily.
Next, Derek took her in his arms, untucking her arms from the blanket swaddle to give her a fist bump. He swayed her about the room while Katia relaxed a little more. The deep humming in his chest soothed the wrinkles on her forehead. Katia stretched as if to touch his face, and her mouth gaped at him.
“Aww, baby genius is ready for a nap.” Derek yawned too, “Who’s gonna micromanage me while I put her down?”
“Me! Me!” Y/N said, his enthusiasm muted by tiredness. Spencer leapt to his side, helping him out of bed, his teammates watching fondly as he did so. Y/N was allowed out the room first, Derek close behind and clicking his tongue at little Katia.
“She’s so sweet,” Emily said, her eyes on the pair’s backs and the dangling loose blanket from under Derek’s left arm. “I’m so happy for you both.” And she hugged Spencer tight; Emily always gave such good hugs. Good thing she was going to be around to give plenty to his daughter.
Then, down the hall, he heard Derek say with sarcastic resignation, “Oh Spencer, I thought Y/N was kidding when he said no more seahorse themed items.
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
Y/N ended up climbing into the bathtub with Katia. Even as she had grown into her chubby features, looking more and more like him and Spencer with each passing day, she was still so small.
Sitting up with her in his lap to help her out, Y/N lowered her into the warm water. His fingers tenderly rubbed the blackcurrant scented soap on her tummy, copying her expression as her tongue poked out between her gums. Her jerking legs rejected the water that Y/N’s hands cupped to rinse the bubbles off.
“Oh!” Y/N said in surprise as Katia sneezed, “Bless you.”
He heard the front door go, but he let Spencer follow the clues to their bathroom. Sure enough, the Doctor soon entered with his jacket shed, already rolling his sleeves up as he dropped onto the bathmat. A hand curled at Y/N’s chin as he kissed him before it stroked over the damp wisps of hair on Katia’s head.
“Hello. Hi.” His voice was that bit more delicate as he caught Katia’s eye and welcomed her big gappy smile.
Y/N tilted his head towards Spencer. “Good day?”
“I missed you both.” Spencer swished the water around by Katia’s side, “Isn’t it incredible how she’s experiencing all of this for the first time?”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake.”
Spencer giggled away as the surrounding bathwater yellowed and Katia flapped her arms.
“Mind your language.” He said without any weight to his warning, “Our little girl can’t help it.” Then he stood and prepared her towel, a deep-sea blue that brought out her eyes. “Can I feed her tonight?”
“Of course, baby,” Y/N agreed as he lifted Katia out of the tub, where Spencer caught her and bundled her up with skilled speed. As he dried her off, Katia cooed away to herself. She did get a little pissed off when he dressed her up in a clean nappy and a sleepsuit, but Spencer couldn’t take her crumpled expression seriously without the tears.
The rocking chair had to be one of his best investments for his daughter’s room. It soothed Katia from the darkest of tantrums, a familiarity that swayed her. She fit so perfectly into Spencer’s arms and he fit so contentedly into the seat. Her eyelashes fluttered slowly shut as she drank more milk.
Not quite strong enough to sit up on her own, Katia leant fully into Spencer’s hand while he burped her – thankfully not for long. Then it was off into her cot.
Y/N watched him from the doorway as Spencer stroked the apple of Katia’s cheek while she drifted off into slumber. An effortless smile danced on his lips even as he switched the lamp off and welcomed Y/N over to see their sleeping babe.
“Love seeing you with her, Old Daddy Spencer teaching her everything she’ll need to know.” The kiss that followed was certainly not appropriate for their daughter’s nursery, so he took Y/N by the hand, leading him into the hallway. Even then, between the short pecks that pressed against his lips, Y/N continued to talk, “Is this how you felt while I was pregnant?”
Breath hot against his face, Spencer swallowed hard while Y/N said, “Seeing my handsome boyfriend carrying our child? I think I get it now.”
His hand slipped up Spencer’s shirt. It was crystal clear what his intentions were. Spencer was already close to panting when he pulled Y/N flush against him. With more desperation this time, they fumbled around their home until they made it to their bed. Spencer’s hands aligned with the stretch marks on Y/N’s thighs as he grabbed them and pulled him on top.
He huffed as Y/N’s teeth tugged and released his bottom lip, “We have to be quiet.”
“I can be quiet.” Y/N ripped off his shirt in one smooth movement, “Can you?”
Spencer couldn’t give an answer. Instead he pulled Y/N back against him as they fell onto their sheets.
Their first time in months, it didn’t last very long, but it was exactly what they needed.
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
 The biggest surprise of the evening was that Rossi put down his drink to hold Katia. To be fair though, he had already had a few. Hence why he was singing and dancing around the garden with Katia in his arms. What a sight to behold, it eased the pain of Derek and Hotch’s absence, their own kids to take care of now.
Eventually Rossi relented, allowing Penelope to take Katia, turning to Y/N who had kept a watchful eye on his actions, “Promise me you’ll bring her over when she’s allowed to eat food.”
“I can’t give her your food for her first taste. She’ll be disappointed for the rest of her life,” Y/N joked, Rossi letting out a boisterous laugh that made Katia giggle in turn.
Penelope got to hold Katia next and show her off to Henry who was very intrigued to learn more about his godsister – Spencer told him that was who Katia was and it stuck. Henry became Penelope’s little shadow until they found a seat for him and a cushion for his lap to hold the baby. His joy unbridled at such a responsibility was adorable. He posed for many photos, while Katia for once stayed quiet.
Spencer was tired but the best kind of tired. A night in with friends, watching his boyfriend and his daughter be welcomed as much as he was, it wasn’t a surprise but it was always a delight. And this moment right now, Y/N cradling Katia’s with one hand squeezing her little foot before he planned to take her into Rossi’s office? What a life they had cultivated together. As he sipped his drink, the bliss in his tummy was not doused by it.
 ---> ---> ---> ---> --->
Slouching on the sofa, Spencer watched with tired eyes as Katia stumbled in the room, her hands held in Y/N’s while she waddled between his legs. Her round face lit up at the sight of Spencer. Her pace increased beyond her abilities and Katia swung forward a little as she almost fell over.
“Oh dear,” Y/N cooed while Katia got back to her unstable feet. “That’s it, there we go.”
Spencer wished he had the energy to properly appreciate this moment, especially since both his boyfriend and their daughter were grinning like they shared a secret.
Katia dropped down onto her nappy-cushioned bottom then began to crawl over to Spencer’s feet. His hands, although dirty, rough and near ruined, accepted her offer and lifted Katia up into his lap. They stayed for safety around her middle, keeping her sat up straight as she looked on him with those big eyes. Eyes that were fresh and untainted copies of his own.
Y/N sat down beside Spencer, leaning in close to Katia so he caught her attention, “Hey, why don’t you show your Daddy what we’ve been practicing?”
Looking away from both her Dads, Katia drooled and pushed her fist in her mouth. Y/N waved until he and Spencer were back into her line of sight.
“Go on, sugar plum.” He pointed to Spencer, “Who’s that?” And he mouthed the answer to her.
“Dadadadadada.”
It was barely above a whisper. But her little grin, the top of a tooth poking out of the centre of her bottom gums, the way Katia looked at Spencer when she said it? A soft “oh” fell from Spencer’s lips and he clutched her close, her chubby arms barely reaching around his neck. His breath shaking out of him, he kissed the thick thatch of hair that had sprouted in his absence. He could feel Katia whispering “Dadadadada!” again.
“That’s me, Katia, I’m your Dada.” He sniffed back the sting in his eyes at the absolute proof that, in his time away from her, she had remembered him. When he moved away, placing Katia back into his lap, he closed his eyes as Katia’s scrabbling fingers rubbed across the tip of his nose.
Katia made a sudden attempt to stand, throwing her entire bodyweight towards Spencer. Spencer’s breath was snatched from his lungs and the tension remained even after he caught her with ease.
“You ok?” Y/N said and Spencer noticed that his hand was supporting his against Katia.
Spencer nodded weakly, “Hmm, you?”
“Better now.” Y/N let his hand go and began rubbing Spencer’s back in the same circular motions that Spencer rubbed Katia’s.
A tug snagged Spencer’s head to the left and he tutted as Katia grabbed at his cheek, “Ow, Katia, no.”
Instead, Katia took a fistful of the next thing she could find, which was Spencer’s hair, and she cried out an identical (if higher pitched) “Ow!”
“You hurt Spencer, not the other way around, Katia. Stop faking.” Y/N scolded playfully.
But Katia repeated Spencer’s outburst again, “Ow!”
Y/N lifted Katia’s little fist from Spencer’s hair, and it immediately clamped down on Spencer’s finger as an alternative to wave about.
Spencer kissed her hand, still so tiny and forgiving against his. He looked at Y/N, blinking fast as he half-heartedly said, “She’s so like you.”
The lock of hair Katia had yanked on curved around Y/N’s touch as he put it back into the disarray of fluff that stood around Spencer’s head, “That’s funny, because I think she’s so like you.”
---> ---> ---> ---> --->
Tilting the pram onto its back wheels, Spencer pushed it up the step and into the aquarium tunnel. Katia lay back in her seat while gumming on her blanket corner. Her eyes were ready to take in the sights.
Y/N knelt before her, suffering a few kicks to his knees from Katia’s excitement. Her pram clips were undone. Little Katia was released into her Daddy’s arms then plonked up onto his shoulders. Her starfish-like hands pressed up against the glass. Her mouth became as wide as her eyes as she pointed at the stingray rippling past. She had seen fish before (Carl and Rosalind at home) but never like this.
“Yeah, that’s a ray, Katia,” Y/N rubbed his fingers over her back, his hands still to keep her steady.
Spencer pointed his finger right next to hers, “They use their electro-sensors, not their eyes, to find their meals which consists of shrimps, clams, and -”
Katia shrieked – interrupting his and she smacked her hands against the glass. No one seemed to mind though. Some patrons in the tunnel even chuckled at her behaviour. Like she needed any more encouragement, especially with Y/N grinning up at her and tickling her sides to elicit more laughter from his daughter.
When Spencer’s hand dropped, Katia shouted again. A little confused, he returned it and Katia took his finger in her hand then began dragging the tip across where the ray was.
“She wants it as a pet, what do you say, baby?”
“I thought you said not to get you any fish for your birthday.”
Eventually Katia was returned to the pram. Her head was thrown back to watch the rest of the tunnel go by. Then she hid her face in her blankie once they were out in the last few exhibits. There was a little tug of war to get her to let it go (she was a lot stronger than Y/N gave her credit for) and see the one other exhibit that both parents were invested in.
Taking her hand again, Spencer squatted beside the pram. “Hey look, the men seahorsies have the babies. They’re just like your Daddy.”
“Your favourite Daddy,” Y/N ruffled Spencer’s hair while Spencer pretended to be outraged. Katia caught onto the dramatic expression Spencer was wearing and copied him with a gasp added for good measure.
“What d’you reckon, any of these were babies when we went to visit last time?”
“Well, Y/N, the lifespan of these seahorses is approximately a year. So they could be.” He knew it was unlikely but, for the sake of the smiles on Y/N’s and Katia’s face, Spencer let it be.
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