#Merlin: I'm actually bi
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Lancelot: Wait a minute. You're not gay? Merlin: Gay? What are you talkin' about? I'm not gay. Where'd you get gay? Lancelot: Come on. I mean, you're always talking about "Arthur this" and "Arthur that" Merlin: Okay even if I'm gay I would not be attracted to that smug prat
#Merlin: I'm actually bi#playing a riff on one of my latest#Also#source: modern family#incorrect merlin quotes#lancelot#arthur pendragon#merlin emrys#bbc merlin#merlin bbc#merthur#merlin#sir lancelot du lac#merlin x arthur#prince arthur#merlin and arthur#incorrect merthur quotes#merthur incorrect quotes#merlin incorrect quotes#lancelot du lac#arthur x merlin#bbc merthur#adorable merthur#king arthur#merlin headcanons#bbc arthur#merlin shitposts#incorrect quotes#too many tags
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I want Uther to be the kinda guy who isn't actually homophobic, but his anti-magic laws made it so impossible to change any law that he ends up having to act like he is. (He'd lose his credibility otherwise that the magic laws cannot be changed, cause duh, they are law, lol.)
This results in him having to manage his bi-sons behavior by pulling him aside every time he says something outrageously gay.
The thing is, Arthur is oblivious to the whole thing.
Arthur: Merlin, do you know how to walk on your knees?
*imagine Uther grabbing Arthur by the collar like a cat and facing him*
Uther: son, no.
Arthur: but-
Uther: we talked about this. No flirting with boys.
Arthur: i'm not flirting with him, i'm threatening him. Here, see? "Merlin, i could take you apart with one blow!"
Uther: *facepalms*, oh my god.
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1: Magic is a Metaphor < 2: Morgana is a Lesbian < 3: Merlin is Gay > 4: Arthur is Bi
Again with the whole metaphor thing, Merlin's entire character is about having to hide his identity and wishing that he could be free to be himself so that he wouldn't have to lie about how much Arthur means to him. So that's all very gay, but he's also just very queer-coded generally. There are so many jokes about him being more effeminate or wearing women's clothing, most notably in this episode where he dresses in full drag and then takes the opportunity to shamelessly flirt with Arthur. Unhinged.
Basically every other character seems to just assume that he's gay, at least towards the end, because Gaius and Arthur are in utter disbelief that Merlin would be 'seeing a girl'. And of course he isn't, he's actually sneaking around with that druid guy, leading Arthur to question how courting a girl would leave him 'walking with a limp.'
I also think it's very interesting how often Merlin has to pretend to be attracted to women to avoid people discovering his secret, like with Gwen in Series 1 or Morgana in Series 2. Or this scene, where Gwen and Merlin are the only people not affected by the Lamia's seduction charm and they're trying to figure out why. And Merlin says, 'it doesn't affect you because you're a woman'. And firstly, Gwen is like, 'so what?' So, bisexual queen. And then Merlin says, "it only affects men," and Gwen says, "so then why haven't you fallen under her spell?" And Merlin is just like, 'oh shit, I don't know. I can't think of any reason why I wouldn't be seduced by a woman.'
Now, you might be saying, "but Merlin is attracted to women! what about that one female love interest he had for literally one episode who immediately died?" Oh, you mean:
I'm sorry to all of the Freylin shippers out there, but this was so clearly just the writers' last-ditch attempt to make Merlin straight. If you think about it, Freya also 'has magic' if you catch my drift, and that is the only thing that she and Merlin have in common, and the only thing that they talk about. And if you look at their dialogue out of context, it really doesn't seem like it's magic that they're talking about. It's just gay/lesbian solidarity. Also, never forget when Colin Morgan accidentally referred to Merlin's potential love interests as "him or her." So who else could he have been thinking of?
Merlin definitely had a crush on Lancelot. From the moment that they first meet, he just keeps going on about, 'omg, isn't Lancelot so strong and brave and chivalrous? God, I hope he becomes a knight, he would look so good in a suit of armour.' And then he says to Gwen, completely unprompted, "so just for the sake of argument– Arthur or Lancelot?" Why are you thinking about that Merlin? Then that scene ends with Merlin and Lancelot getting drunk and stumbling home together and waking up the next morning having shared Merlin's single bed. So take from that what you will. I don't necessarily think that anything happened between them, not because I think Lancelot is straight, don't get it twisted, just because I think he's a fucking virgin.
But certified pansexual manwhore Gwaine on the other hand, oh they definitely fucked. And it's a very similar situation to Lancelot, Merlin's only flirting technique is just to find some buff guy who's just saved his life and be like, 'oh my god what can I possibly do to repay you? Maybe you could come back to my place and I could tend to your wounds and then we could go down to the tavern, have a few drinks'.
And it works. Merlin literally used his job as apprentice physician to the Knights of the Round Table as his own personal Grindr, and i love that for him. But, of course, these are just side hoes to Merlin's main bitch, Arthur.
You can deny everything else that I've said, but you cannot deny that Merlin was in love with Arthur. And don't even try to say, 'but it's just because it was his destiny'. Because, yeah, like that's any less gay. They're two sides of the same coin, destined to be together, Merlin 'uses magic only for Arthur'. Come on.
Also, it's pretty clear that Merlin cares about Arthur more than he cares about his destiny, throughout the entire show. But it culminates in this scene in series five where, because of very contrived plot reasons, Arthur has to choose between legalizing magic and saving the life of Mordred. And Merlin convinces Arthur not to legalise magic so that he will let Mordred die. He literally enables the genocide of his own people and condemns himself to a lifetime of suffering just on the off chance that he can spend a bit more time with Arthur.
And if that isn't heartbreaking enough, of course, every action that Merlin makes only confirms Arthur's fate. And after he very platonically dies in Merlin's arms, as dudebros do, what does Merlin do? does he go back to Camelot and live a full happy heterosexual life? Of course not. No, he spends the next one and a half thousand years just waiting at Arthur's resting place, waiting for the day that Arthur will be resurrected and they can be together again. What the fuck kind of Greek tragedy, Achilles and Patroclus level shit is that? That is fucking gay.
#this is so fucking long omg sorry#consider this series as a masterpost of all of my ramblings#merlin#merlance#merwaine#merthur#bbc merlin#merlin meta#the magic of metaphor
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headcanons that have come from nowhere:
Phoenix and Rooster slept with each other at least once and said meh and moved on - they are bi besties
Hangman actually doesn't have daddy issues, he has 'my parents were emotionally neglectful and perfectionist' issues that he doesn't realize he has because he still thinks their behaviour and expectations were normal and deserved - he thinks love is conditional and tries really hard to meet those conditions even if they're unrealistic and when he thinks he can't, he acts out
he's also the youngest or second youngest child
Bob can't drive, as in, he doesn't even have a driving licence
Fanboy is the 'looks like a cinnamon roll but could kill you' character type (have you seen the way he smiled when Hangman and Rooster were roasting each other in the bar? that dude is the dude)
pulling the papers thing was more complicated than 'I promised your mom' - Mav won't admit it to anyone but while Carole did ask him to keep Bradley from flying, he used it as a rationalization
Goose was from Tennessee (I'm not even American and I'd swear he seems like he's from Tennessee) and Carole was a NY transplant from Virginia.
Carole met Mav in a group home in Brookhaven - they were in foster siblings and kept contact after Mav aged out. He was the one to introduce Goose to her. Goose actually thought she was Mav's girlfriend at first since she was sending him a lot of letters
Slider and Ice's friendship is definitely a case of the extrovert adopting the lonely introvert
In fact, Slider's mom 'adopted' Ice as her second son when she met him in the exact same manner
Merlin retired earlier and there were a couple of years when Slider was flying with Mav
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₊˚⊹☆ all my drs!!
have a list of all the drs i officially shift to (˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶) .ᐟ.ᐟ (in order of discovery) The ages are accurate to the moment i will shift in these drs if that makes sense..
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Better CR ⪼ Soren Minerva, 15 years old
this is where i'll permashift to 😼
Solar System ⪼ Soren Minerva, 8 years old
this dr is very similar to my bcr, but its the one with lore and history and gods etc also i shift at 8 just so i can bask in the 2010 years again because lets be honest they were the best ( ˶ˆᗜˆ˵ )
My Hero Academia ⪼ Aiden Konoike, 14 years old
i'm just a girl in this one. ૮꒰ྀི∩´ ᵕ `∩꒱ྀིა
Demon Slayer ⪼ Hoshi Tomioka, 16 years old
i'll have to figure this one out again, i just know i have cosmic breathing 🥳 zenitsu is probably my s/o •ᴗ•
Genshin Impact ⪼ Fleur, 18 years old(physically)
this one is lore heavy as well, but rn im just a court multitasker/protean at fontaine. i picked neuvillette as my found family, and kaeya & thoma as my lovers •ᴗ•
ParadoxLive ⪼ Nova Fall, 18 years old
aka one of my most hyped drs. im an idol there and a very cliche one at that. like that one barbie popstar movie where she transforms on stage, me core. i date nayuta because he's the only true one for me ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧
What in HELL is bad? ⪼ Selene, 19 years old
i sort of follow the game plot, as in im the daughter of solomon. i didnt go too far in the game yet but i jst KNOW i either get close with satan or leviathan
Sonic the Hedgehog ⪼ Lune, do mobians have age..
this is the closest i currently am to being a princess, but im not royalty..sonic and shadow broke me out of my castle and brought me to green hill 😐 anyways i summon crystals with a wand weewoo! with the chaos emeralds i summon a crystal golem thing ◝(ᵔᵕᵔ)◜
Land of the Lustrous ⪼ Opal, 400 years old
not much to say except that opal looks uncannily close to diamond in appearance. i date zircon! or idk but we're best friends! ◝(ᵔᵕᵔ)◜
Helodon ⪼ Atria, 20 years old
this is my partner's world - he writes a lot like me so of COURSE he has his own world like me and allowed me to shift there. i dont have much info on myself either i just know im cute and i love sothoth ૮꒰ྀི∩´ ᵕ `∩꒱ྀིა
Spiderverse ⪼ Blair Fall or Minerva idk, 16 years old
my alias is haxxor bunny, because its literally bronya's haxxor bunny skin in hi3..i attack like her too! and i got beef with aiden<3 im not sure but i think i'll date a spiderman version of sero there ٩(^ᗜ^ )و ´-
90's dr ⪼ Kami Bateman, 26 years old
im a model hehe. and i date a perfectly sane and healthy patrick bateman really i just like his looks, i scripted he was really sweet ( ⸝⸝´꒳`⸝⸝)
AFK Journey ⪼ Merlin, 300 years old
again i lost interest in the game but im still shifting there. my alias is jinx and im a vampire, also im a dude lol. my s/o is valen<3 but soren is so close to taking the cake and i'd be so mad cause dude got the same name as the host 😨 also im dura's son!
Wuthering Waves ⪼ Orion, 20 years old
okay bare with me i still love the game but im unable to play it so i cry every day. anyways..my original plan was to be part of the fractsidus under the alias Hikaru but i dont think i wanna do that anymore. so yeah i dont much abt myself here either! i really like (male) rover i hold him 🫴 maybe i'll be like jinhsi's brother or something ( ⸝⸝´꒳`⸝⸝)
? ⪼ Viktor, 25 years old
bare with me (bis) when i say i love viktor but i became aware of him just because i love the steampunk aesthetic and because we dont have a mechanic in this list. i'm still hesitant of him being from belobog and possibly dating luocha or jing yuan, i need to play hsr more. "( – ⌓ – )=3
Undertale ⪼ Rune, 7-8 or however old Frisk is
this is actually my first ever dr. ive had a huge undertale hyperfixation (1-3 years) and i basically made an oc which was a self insert. it was also my first ever lore which was super complicated idk how 7 year old me thought of it. when i was 9 i accidentally manifested that what happened to frisk would happen to me, i didnt know what was shifting or manifestation i just wrote down the same thing about 100 times while believing in it a lot. guess it worked with a 7 years delay because now im shifting there! i dont know how it will go but i see a happy "ending" with the monsters living with me n frisk at the surface cause WHY TF NOT.
Kaiju no.8 ⪼ haha i dont have any info on them.
i recently started watching k8 and i love it and could see myself going there, but i don't know anything about myself there ദ്ദി(。•̀ ,<)~✩‧₊
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#reality shifting#shiftblr#shifters#shiftinconsciousness#shifting#shifting antis dni#shifting blog#shifting community#shifting diary#shifting motivation#desired reality shifting#shifting script
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I don’t have real coherent words after that Oliver interview so I need to hear yours. Because OH MY GOD
Vindication??? VINDICATION???? VIN~DIC~ATION???!!!!!!
Like we knew. We all knew. All the fans knew, and everyone working with the show knew. But the fact that they're actually talking about it? Being transparent about it? From Mr. PR Golden Boy's mouth to the masses? Mind-blowing.
To know for a fact that Bi Buck (and I'm assuming queer Eddie and queer Buddie) was talked about (again we KNEW but like now we know know, ya know)??? I mean Tim literally said years ago that all the discussions we have about buddie online are the discussions they have in the writer's room. The fact that they TRIED to give it us and were shut down. The fact that we still rallied behind them because we fucking. KNEW?!!?!?!
Like queer fans especially like....I'm not going to get into the history of queercoding/the Hayes Code, but anyone who's been around the block with queer media just knows that writers (not just 911 writers) have done their damndest over the years to give the audience queer characters while still trying to appease their homophobic bosses that control their livelihood and the life of their art in general.
It just fucking sucks that only now, when networks realize that openly queer media sells, that they're finally allowing writers and creators to finally tell their authentic stories.
911 is interesting. They're kinda like the elder Gen-Z/Young millennial cuspers. They started during a time when queer media was allowed some visibility but still had heavy sanctions placed upon it, and so they still dealt with homophobia and discrimination in underhanded and mostly invisible ways, and are living long enough to see the social transition into big profitable open queer media.
It's like...I've heard a lot of elder queer people question why some of their fellow elders are so "mad" that young queer people have it "easier" and can be more "open". The critique is "isn't that what we were all fighting for? So that younger people did not have to deal with what we dealt with?" The same goes for TV. I know a lot of people (like people who came from SPN or the MCU or Merlin or Rizzoli & Isles or Sherlock, etc) are seeing what's happening with 911 and they're experiencing this shock of like "we deserved this" and they did. But now they get to see the fruits of their labor come true for new(er) shows like 911 or RW&Rb or Heartstopper or Heartbreak High, or Interview with a Vampire or Good Omens or Umbrella Acadmey or Euphoria or Yellowjackets or the Haunting of Bly Manor, etc.
It's still a long battle, but occasionally, like now, we get to see these BIG wins, and it should be something to celebrate.
This, combined with the fact that we knew a queer Eddie storyline was also being discussed, tells me all I needed to know. And again, I already fucking knew.
Now all we gotta do is wait. We've already waited this long.
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any suggestions for queer books for a junior high school library? there's a book order coming up in december and i noticed my school is severely lacking in queer books so i need some ones to request. in particular, we're really lacking in books with transgender and/or bisexual main characters. (also, i'm in the south so books that have been targeted by bans may not be available here)
Absolutely yes. The ban-targeting is definitely a challenge (my Cool for the Summer is actually a great fit for this but may be an issue for that reason), but let’s see what we can do!
For trans main characters I think are a good fit for that age, try Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas, Zenobia July by Lisa Bunker, the graphic novel Cheer Up! by Crystal Frasier, Val Wise, and Oscar O. Jupiter, the upcoming graphic novel Girlmode by Magdalene Visaggio and Paulina Ganucheau (upcoming as in 3 weeks from now, so it’ll be out by December), Mask of Shadows by Linsey Miller (genderfluid MC), The Heartbreak Bakery by AR Capetta (agender MC, transmasc LI), The Passing Playbook by Isaac Fitzsimons, Spell Bound by FT Lukens (nonbinary MC), Most Ardently by Gabe Cole Novoa, I Wish You All the Best by Mason Deaver (nonbinary MC), Self Made Boys by Anna-Marie McLemore, and The Borrow a Boyfriend Club by Page Powars. (Those are all YA except Zenobia July, but I felt like that one might work for older tween readers in a way other titles might not, just because the MC’s a hacker, which is cool.)
For bi main characters, some of the above also fit (I Wish You All the Best and The Borrow a Boyfriend Club come to mind immediately), and also try Cool for the Summer, Some Girls Do by Jennifer Dugan, You Should See Me in a Crown by Leah Johnson, Wish You Weren’t Here by Erin Baldwin, Running With Lions by Julian Winters, Leah on the Offbeat by Becky Albertalli (Imogen is newer and great but not sure if college visits are as interesting to junior high students?), Perfect on Paper by Sophie Gonzales, Hani & Ishu’s Guide to Fake Dating by Adiba Jaigirdar, I’ll Be the One by Lyla Lee, The Disasters by MK England, the Emry Merlin series by Robyn Schneider, The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzi Lee, and They Both Die at the End by Adam Silvera.
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what’s a ship you like that most people don’t?
Wow, y'all are really going for the ship asks! Since I'm home sick from work today - again ugh - I guess I'll keep cranking out answers!
This one is so funny to me, because I honestly have a very hard time judging which ships are loved and which ones aren't, with the exception of a few that I love and happen to know are super popular - Percabeth in PJO, Merthur in Merlin, and Din/Luke in SW, for example. I really do tend to enjoy, or at least understand, most ships! Romantic and platonic! It's fun to think of the different ways that different ships bring out different aspects of different characters, and I enjoy playing around with those dynamics. Y'all might be surprised to know it, but I enjoy friendships/family/platonic relationships as much as I enjoy romantic ones! But here are a couple of specifically unusual loves, I guess?
So let's see... I don't know how people feel about Sally/Paul in PJO, but that is a ship that I absolutely adore? I love the idea of Sally having a stable, supportive, rolls-with-the-punches guy in her life, because I think she deserves that kind of peaceful normalcy. 😌
OH, this might be a good one. I don't have any idea how many people know the old Star Wars Expanded Universe these days (its called Legends now), but when I was a teenager I was a hard-core Luke/Mara shipper! I very much doubt that is a popular ship these days, because I've recently seen that a lot of folks headcanon Luke to be gay. I can totally get on board with him - and honestly everyone in the SW universes - being queer, but I see him as more bi/pan/whatever label makes him/you happy. And his dynamic with Mara is just the most perfect enemies to lovers story to ever exist, so I still love it very deeply, even now, and could still talk about it for hours! (I don't actually want to think about how much that ship has shaped my psyche, lol.)
#thank you for the fun ask my anonymity friend!#pjo hoo toa cotg#star wars legends#star wars EU#merlin#percabeth#merthur#dinluke#sally jackson × paul blofis#lukemara#luke skywalker x mara jade#ship ask tag
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Prince Charming x James Hook | Trophy Boy ChapteR
Tags :Sorta Enemies to Lovers Fake/Pretend Relationship Not Canon Compliant, Inspired by Cinderella (1997), I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Prince Charming is a Bi-King, Prince Charming Is Filipino, Because the actor is and I also am one so yeah, Prince Charming gets a lot of bitches but no love, Merlin Academy (Disney), James Hook is gay, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, I don't know how to tag in this fandom, No Beta Like Not Going To Castlecoming
Summary:
Charming had himself caught up in a pretty little lie, telling his parents he had a date for his birthday ball. Desperate to stop their meddling in his love life, he came up with a plan: show up with someone who’d make the court gasp—a notorious pirate at school, James Hook. It was supposed to be a quick fix: fake a romance, cause a stir, and be free from the royal matchmakers forever. But the more time Charming spent with Hook—as a person, the sharp banter—the more complicated things got. This wasn’t just about pretending anymore. He was starting to get hooked. Or The sorta enemies to fake dating to lovers between Hook and Charming no one asked for.
Content Rating: Teen and Up.
Wordcount: 5,931
Notes (Same On AO3):
Hi, I'm Ace. But I'm here posting and writing more gay shit for the Descendants fandom.
I'm one for a crack ship and these two don't even interact in the movie so you may be wondering what made me do this. Three things actually:
I'm in the Descendants editing community and I saw this edit by @jewishvarian. Hook's actor Josh pretty much showing his support to this ship has made we want to do this.
The second inspiration is Once Upon A Time ship Captain Charming my sister had a Once Upon A Time phase so I know quite a bit about them. The third thing the catalyst for this is the fanfic Stage Call by Montythecrow. (The first chapter is really good can't wait for more. Also R.I.P. DBD I never got to make a DBD fic before it got cancelled *sighs in JATP*)
Let's do some housekeeping and explain the lore because this fic grabs from fifty million things.
- The Brandy Cinderella movie or Rodgers & Hammerstein's Cinderella (1997) as it's also known are major inspirations. I pulled the characterization of Charming from this film and the new Descendants film and I pulled the whole of Charming's parents and his butler Lionel from this movie. (Pls watch this movie. It's really fun, campy and entertaining.)
- I also took from various Prince Charming media from Cinderella movies from Disney to non-Disney. Charming (2018)'s Trophy Boy by Avril Lavigne, Ashely Tisdale and G.E.M. is where the title of this fic comes from. It's a bad movie but this song is legendary and pop perfection. A K-pop star, a Disney star, and a rock star all in one song is crazy.
- This fic has multiple POV's for Charming focused parts 👑 emojis are used on the other hook if it's James it's this emoji 🪝.
- Finally, this isn't a GayashellJATP fic without a playlist of songs I have on that help immerse you in the universe. Spotify playlist here!!!
Now that we are done with some housekeeping. Enjoy the fic & Remember to give feedback!!! It is always appreciated.
Notes (Tumblr):
I'm trying to do better on posting on here and being on time. With being a cross platform author. I still don't know how Tumblr works pls help me. Once again I suggest you read on AO3 my formatting is way better on that.
Chapter 1: Before The Ball
👑
Charming was so screwed.
He'd been excused from class by royal summons, which only meant one of two things: either bad news or... well, worse news. Lionel, the family’s loyal servant and his assigned guardian at the academy, was jittery, practically fidgeting as he escorted the skateboarding teen to the castle.
Lionel’s nervousness only heightened Charming's suspicion—did he tattle on him sneaking out of the academy for a late-night date? Again? Or worse—had he forgotten some royal obligation that would now come back to bite him?
Despite the comfortable life he'd been born into, Charming had a talent for getting into situations that made it... uncomfortable. Usually of his own making.
The moment they arrived at the vast, gilded throne room, the knot in his stomach twisted tighter. His mother stood. Not good. Queen Constantina only stood when something serious—truly serious—was about to be discussed. Lionel cleared his throat and began the ceremonial introduction.
“Your Royal Highness, Prince Charming—”
The Queen interrupted with a sharp glance. “Prince Christopher Rupert Windermere Vladimir—”
“Mom,” Charming sighed, cutting Lionel off. “He doesn’t have to say it every time.” The poor man practically bowed in relief when Charming gestured for him to be seated. The full name was ridiculously wordy, one of the many reasons why "Prince Charming" stuck much more easily.
“Son, you didn’t need to dismiss him,” King Maximilian spoke up from beside the queen, kissing his wife’s hand. Charming had to resist the urge to roll his eyes.
His parents were constantly doing that—displaying affection as if they were still teenagers in love. Any love hater would have gagged, but Charming simply tried to suppress a smirk. Even he couldn't deny they were a good match, for better or worse.
“Mom. Dad. What is it this time?” Charming asked, his voice strained but trying not to sound too impatient.
“Watch your tone, Junior,” his father said, though not harshly.
Charming forced a deep breath. “Fine. What’s the big news?” he said, layering on enthusiasm that was just short of sarcasm.
The Queen exchanged a meaningful glance with her husband before turning to her son, her posture regal and dramatic all at once. "Your eighteenth birthday in two days."
“I thought—” his father began, but a sharp elbow from his wife stopped him. “We thought it would be appropriate to throw a birthday ball.”
Charming's heart sank. "A ball?" His voice came out strained. "Father, is that really necessary?"
Queen Constantina's eyes glistened with an air of theatrics as she responded, “You haven’t shown any of your potential picks for marriage. You are two years overdue for at least a partner!” Her voice hitched as though it were a tragedy in itself.
Charming had tried, of course. He'd gone on more first dates than he cared to count, but none had led to anything serious. His royal reputation for being “charming” only went so far, especially when he wasn’t charmed by anyone.
“I’m working on it,” he muttered, running a hand through his hair. “But Mom, I don’t think a ball for my birthday is necessary.”
“Necessary?” His mother’s voice shot up an octave, her hand flying dramatically to her chest as if she were about to swoon. “Is it necessary that I should die knowing my only son will be a lonely king?!”
Charming’s eyes widened. “Mom, please. You’re not going to—"
“I might!” she countered, her voice trembling as if the mere thought of his supposed future loneliness was too much to bear. “The idea of you being all alone without a wife or family—oh! How tragic it would be!”
Charming rubbed the back of his neck, suppressing a groan. He loved his mom, truly, but sometimes her dramatics were... a lot. “Okay, fine. I get it. But… I have someone. Already. A partner.”
The words were out of his mouth before he had a chance to think them through. His heart nearly stopped as both his parents' faces lit up.
“You do?!” his father exclaimed, clapping his hands together in glee.
The Queen looked like she was about to burst into tears of joy. “Oh, my darling boy! You’ve found someone! You’ve—”
Charming quickly nodded, feeling his stomach churn with regret. “Yep. Found someone. Really great.”
His father beamed. “That’s fantastic news, son! We were beginning to wonder if you'd ever—"
“But the ball,” Queen Constantina interjected with a flourish of her hand. “The ball must still happen! After all, it’s been paid for, and all the preparations have already been made.”
Charming’s shoulders slumped. “Of course it has…”
His mother took his hands, her eyes sparkling. “Oh, darling, I can’t wait to meet this special someone of yours. Bring her to the ball!”
"Yeah. Absolutely," Charming forced a grin, though inside, his mind raced. He was so, so screwed. Not only was the ball happening no matter what, but now he had to show up with a date—someone bad enough to stop his parents from meddling in his love life ever again.
Where on Earth was he going to find that?
👑
Charming zoomed through the academy gates on his skateboard, the wind whipping through his hair as his thoughts churned. Why had he lied? It gnawed at him, the weight of a falsehood pressing on his conscience. Lies weren’t really his thing. Now, he’d have to turn that lie into reality, or it would eat him alive.
As he skated through the courtyard, his gaze caught Fay, a fairy in training and his hexalogy class partner, sitting cross-legged on the grass, her nose buried in a spellbook. She was mumbling under her breath, waving her wand with exaggerated movements as sparks of magic fizzled in the air.
“Hey, Fay,” he called, slowing down as he rolled over.
Fay glanced up, her wide eyes narrowing with playful frustration. “Charming, where were you?” she asked, tapping her wand against her open book. “Do you have any idea how hard it is to hex yourself and then unhex yourself without your partner? I nearly turned myself into a frog!”
“Royal duties,” Charming shrugged, offering an apologetic smile.
Fay’s expression softened immediately. She knew all too well the burden his title carried. “What did the queen say this time?” she asked, her tone light but sympathetic.
Charming rubbed the back of his neck. “We’re throwing another ball.”
Fay’s face lit up. “A ball? Isn’t that fantastic—” she paused, noticing the scowl creeping over Charming's face, “—ally… impossible to enjoy?” She attempted to course-correct, her enthusiasm dimming as she realized how much the idea clearly weighed on him. Fay wasn’t the best at being negative, but she tried.
“But I’ll make it up to you. I’ll be there for the next class.”
“You better be,” Fay huffed, but her tone was forgiving.
“The whole kingdom’s invited. Maybe I’ll catch you at the ball?”
“Nah, I doubt it. I’ll be here practicing my spells,” she said with a shy smile, already inching back toward her book. Fay wasn’t one for social events—she always seemed to vanish from them, though Charming never asked why.
“Well, I’ll see you later,” Charming said, giving her a quick wave.
“Later, skater!” Fay called, attempting to sound cool, which earned a chuckle from Charming. She couldn’t help but laugh at herself as he rolled away.
But as Charming skated off, Fay accidentally mispronounced her next spell. Instead of reciting "double the bubbles," she muttered "double the wobbles" under her breath. Without realizing it, she had casted a spell on Charming’s skateboard, causing it to take on a life of its own.
Charming, an experienced skater, didn’t notice anything at first. But as he glided past the group of notorious students hanging out by the courtyard's edge, the board beneath his feet began to wobble violently, as though possessed.
His body lurched forward, trying to steady himself, but the board had other ideas. It veered, zigzagging uncontrollably, and before Charming could react, it shot straight toward a cluster of students.
In a blur of motion, Charming collided with none other than Captain James Hook—his pirate classmate, and perhaps the academy’s most infamous heartthrob after Charming himself. With a loud thud, both boys went crashing to the ground, Hook's shiny golden hook clattering against the stone courtyard as they tumbled in a tangle of limbs.
Charming groaned, disentangling himself. “I’m so sorry!” he blurted, scrambling to his feet. His skateboard had spun off and smacked into a nearby tree, finally bringing the spell to a halt.
Hook stood up slowly, glaring down at Charming with narrowed eyes. His gaze was sharp and menacing, but there was a flicker of something else—jealousy? Amusement? It was hard to tell.
“You really are a royal asshole, aren’t you?” Hook growled, dusting off his crimson blazer. His voice dripped with venom, but there was something undeniably captivating about the way he spoke. “Gunning for me, were you?”
“No! No, I swear. I didn’t mean to—I lost control of the board.”
Hook didn’t seem convinced. He stepped closer, his imposing presence casting a shadow over Charming. “You were heading straight toward me, mate,” Hook said, his tone dangerously low. His golden hook gleamed as he pointed it directly at Charming’s perfect face. “That doesn’t seem like much of an accident.”
Charming’s heart pounded as his eyes flicked from Hook’s face to the hook hovering too close for comfort. He held up his hands in surrender, his voice calm and soothing. “Whoa, easy,” he said, gently grabbing Hook’s wrist and pushing the hook away from his face. For a brief second, his fingers brushed against Hook’s skin.
For just a moment, Charming couldn’t help but notice Hook. The sharp features, the dark, windswept hair, the way his crimson blazer framed his broad shoulders. And those eyes—intense, narrowed in suspicion, but undeniably alluring.
Charming blinked, snapping out of it. He was in trouble, not admiring the guy who was about to gut him like a fish.
Hook, however, seemed to notice Charming’s lingering gaze. His eyes flashed with something almost wild, and a wicked smirk curled on his lips. “What’s the matter, Prince? Distracted?”
“Uh, no. Not at all. Just… don’t want to get impaled, that’s all.”
Hook raised an eyebrow, amused but not backing down. “Right.” He clicked his tongue, his hook gleaming in the sunlight as he let it fall to his side. “You’re lucky I’m in a good mood today. Or else…” He let the threat hang in the air, his eyes still burning into Charming’s.
“Right, yeah. Lucky,” Charming muttered, his pulse still racing. He wasn’t sure if it was from the near-death experience or the fact that Hook was standing way too close. He hadn’t expected Hook to be so—well, so much. Why was he noticing that now?
Hook’s smirk lingered as he stepped back, finally giving Charming some space. “Try not to skate into any more of your classmates, mate. Especially not me or my crew got it?.” He turned, flipping his collar with an air of superiority, though there was a glint in his eye as he strode away.
Charming watched him leave, shaking his head. Hook was dangerous—and not just because of the hook. There was something else there. Something he really needed to avoid.
But as he glanced back at his skateboard lying against the tree, the thought struck him: maybe, just maybe, Hook was exactly the kind of problem he needed.
If he could bring Hook to the ball, that would surely get his parents off his back. Right?
How would he ever get Hook to agree to that? He was really, really screwed.
🪝
Hook was seething. What a clueless little prince, he thought, his jaw clenched as he stormed through the academy's halls. Charming had to be the most oblivious royal he'd ever met. For someone so poised and charming, the prince had no idea how to navigate the real world.
Not that Hook expected much more from royals—they were all so privileged, so sheltered, so painfully clueless. That’s what made them easy marks. Their money, their fine clothes, their trinkets—it was all just there for the taking, practically begging to be lifted.
But this? This was different. Hook’s pride was bruised more than anything. Charming had made him collide with the earth, of all things, and Hook wasn’t going to forgive the little prince for sullying his pristine, mint-condition vintage blazer. He cast a quick glance at the fabric—no visible damage, but that didn’t matter. The fact that it had touched the ground at all was an unforgivable offense.
And worse, Hook knew his crew would never let him live this down if they found out. His reputation couldn’t take a hit like that, not when he had spent so much time cultivating it. He had to get his revenge. Teach the prince a lesson.
So, during storybook history class, Hook slipped out unnoticed. He snuck across the academy grounds to the royal dormitory— Full of one bed and customized rooms, unlike less privileged students. They weren’t allowed to deface their rooms and they had a roommate system. But Hook wasn’t complaining his roommate was pretty great.
But he wasn’t here to brood. No, he was here to act.
Charming’s dorm was up ahead, and Hook was relieved to see no sign of that bothersome butler Lionel. Of course, the little prince needs a servant to wait on him hand and foot, Hook thought, rolling his eyes. He always found it odd—off-putting, even—that Charming couldn’t go anywhere without a personal attendant. How soft and pampered could you get?
Hook approached Charming’s door, a sly grin spreading across his face. With a quick glance down the hallway, he slipped his golden hook into the lock, working it with practiced ease. Today, he was wearing his favorite hook—the golden one that added a touch of class to his ensemble. He’d have to be careful not to scratch it. The lock gave way with a soft click, and Hook pushed the door open, slipping inside.
The room smelled of expensive cologne, and everything was arranged perfectly. Typical royal. Hook sneered. He moved to the wardrobe, his eyes scanning the rows of pristine clothes.
Charming had quite the collection—mostly royal-styled barongs and beige outfits, which made Hook wrinkle his nose. Beige? Ugh, he thought with disdain. Not his color at all. Where was the flair, the vibrancy? Not a single dark or deep color in sight. Charming had such a boring taste in clothes for someone so well-dressed.
Still, a theft was a theft. Hook rifled through the clothes, trying to find something worth taking. Surely the prince won’t miss a few pieces, he thought, tossing aside a particularly dull-looking beige tunic.
What Hook didn’t realize was how much time he’d spent browsing
But time had gotten away from him, and Hook hadn’t realized how long he’d been sifting through the prince’s belongings until he heard the unmistakable sound of the door opening behind him.
“Looking for something?” came a voice that was far too calm for Hook’s liking.
Hook froze, hand halfway through a drawer of silk cravats. Slowly, he turned around, his heart sinking as he locked eyes with Prince Charming standing in the doorway with a smirk, arms crossed over his chest. He hadn’t expected to get caught—he never got caught.
Hook blinked, trying to regain his composure. “Ah skater boy,” he began, straightening up and smoothing his jacket. “This… is not what it looks like.”
Charming raised an eyebrow, amusement flickering in his eyes. “Really? Because it looks like you’re in my room rifling through my wardrobe.”
Hook swallowed, his mind racing for an excuse. He’d been in tight spots before, but this? This was a mess. “I was, uh… inspecting your clothing choices. Offering a little… constructive criticism, you might say,” Hook replied, flashing a crooked grin, but it didn’t reach his eyes. He wasn’t used to feeling this off-kilter. “No offense, mate, but 50 shades of tan and beige? Really?”
Charming’s expression remained neutral, though there was a glint of something unreadable in his eyes. “And you thought breaking into my room was the best way to offer fashion advice?”
Before Hook could answer, Lionel appeared in the doorway, eyes wide as they flickered between the pirate and the prince. “Am I interrupting, sir? I didn’t expect a guest,” Lionel said, his voice a touch too polite, suspicion creeping in.
Charming, without losing his cool, glanced slightly over his shoulder at Lionel but didn’t shift his focus from Hook. “It’s fine, Lionel. Could you give us a moment?” His tone was dismissive but not unkind, the sort of royal command that left no room for argument.
"Of course, Your Highness," Lionel replied, a touch too formal as he bowed and quickly excused himself, but not without one last curious glance, probably wondering if he had just witnessed the beginnings of some lovers' quarrel. The door closed softly behind him.
The moment Lionel left, Hook let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. He eyed Charming warily, wondering how much trouble he was in. He hated the feeling of being cornered, especially by a royal.
“So…” Hook began, his voice dripping with false confidence. “No need to make this a big deal, yeah? You’re not going to go crying to Merlin, are you?”
Charming’s lips curled into a small smile. “I’m not planning on it, no.”
Sweet relief washed over Hook, but it was short-lived as Charming took a step closer, his tone turning just a shade more serious. “But I can’t just let this slide either, can I?”
Hook swallowed, his bravado faltering for a moment. “I only did this after our little incident,” he blurted out, trying to regain control of the conversation. He gestured vaguely between them, referencing their earlier collision.
Charming tilted his head slightly, as if considering Hook’s words. “And you thought breaking into my room and raiding my wardrobe was the right way to even the score?”
Hook’s mind scrambled for a sweet escape. “Look you don’t need to turn me in,” he said, practically begging now.
Charming considered this for a moment, his gaze flicking over Hook’s disheveled form and the mess of clothes scattered around his room. Then, almost as if a thought occurred to him, his smile returned—this time, sharper. “Actually, I think I might have an idea. Meet me by the castleteria at dinner time.”
“A dinner? You’re not going to tell anyone about this?”
“No, not yet,” Charming replied, his voice smooth but tinged with mischief. “But if you don’t show up, then maybe we’ll reconsider the whole punishment thing.”
Hook’s stomach twisted. He hated feeling like he was at someone’s mercy, especially Charming’s. But something in the prince’s eyes told him this wasn’t just about revenge—it was about leverage. Hook didn’t know what Charming had in mind, but whatever it was, it couldn’t be good.
Still, he nodded, trying to regain his bravado. “Alright, Prince. Dinner date it is.”
Charming smirked, stepping aside to let Hook pass.
Hook left the room, heart still pounding, cursing himself under his breath. He’d been caught, and now, somehow, he was in too deep.
🪝
“Hook, what bullshit did you get into?” Uliana’s voice cut through the room like a whip, her tone sharp with irritation as she lounged on Morgie’s bed, her tentacles subtly shifting.
The five of them were crammed into Hook and Morgie’s shared dorm room, a small space that felt even smaller with Uliana’s dramatic presence filling the air. Hook, on the other hand, was sprawled lazily across his bed, legs crossed like he had not a care in the world, but deep down, his stomach churned with unease.
Hook glanced at Uliana, who was tapping her nails against her belt buckle.. “Relax, Uliana. It’s nothing I can’t handle.”
“Is it a date?” Morgie piped up, his eyes wide with genuine curiosity as he fiddled with a piece of parchment,
Hook scoffed. “Really, wizard-oo? That’s your question?” The brunnete pirate shot back, but he didn’t quite meet Morgie’s gaze, a flicker of discomfort crossing his face. “It’s not a date, you idiot.”
“You didn’t deny it, Hook, so that means you’re going on a date with that royal eyesore,” Maleficent added with a sly smirk, reclining against the wall. She twirled a strand of dark hair between her fingers.
Hook sat up, trying to regain his composure, his golden hook glinting as he gestured wildly. “He’s got a little rebel streak in him, sure, but a date? With me?” Hook forced a laugh, but it came out a little too harsh. “He’s too soft for that.”
Hades, who had been lounging in the corner, arms folded and his fiery blue hair flickering lazily, chimed in with a smirk of his own. “I dunno, mate. You see those blue streaks he’s rocking these days? Kid’s got a little fire in him. You pick them well, James.”
What did the prince have in mind for him? Why had Charming asked him to meet at dinner? He was good at handling himself, but this was different. Royals had a way of twisting things to their advantage, and he wasn’t sure he’d come out on top this time.
Uliana’s tentacles flexed, her eyes narrowing. “This better not blow back on us, Hook. You get tangled up with that prince, and we’re all screwed. I’ve got enough on my plate without cleaning up your messes.”
Morgie, ever the optimist, gave Hook a hopeful smile. “Maybe it won’t be so bad? You two could, you know... find common ground?” He shrugged, completely oblivious to the heavy glares that Uliana shot his way.
Hook grimaced, rubbing the back of his neck. “Trust me, I don’t belive in common ground I’m a pirate after all. The seas are what matter,” he muttered, but even as he said it, he couldn’t shake the nagging feeling that Charming wasn’t as simple as he’d like to believe. Whatever the prince had planned, Hook had no choice but to play along—for now.
👑
Lionel watched as Charming’s fencing movements faltered, his usual grace replaced by distracted, half-hearted parries. The clanging of their swords echoed through the gymnasium, but the prince’s mind was clearly somewhere else.
“Sir—I mean, Christopher, what’s the worry face for?” Lionel asked, lowering his sword slightly, his tone a mix of concern with playful scolding. “Your mother would say frowning is terrible for the face.”
Charming winced and laughed, “Ouch. Thanks for that reminder, Lionel.”
Lionel tilted his head, eyeing the prince with the same scrutiny one might give a misbehaving child. “Having love problems, are we?”
Charming hesitated mid-lunge. “Sorta… kinda... undetermined.” He shrugged, trying to mask the uncertainty in his voice with nonchalance.
“I’ll try to make sense of that, sir,”
Charming straightened up, tossing his sword onto the nearby rack. “I do have a problem,”
“And what may that be, Your Highness?”
“I lied to my parents,” Charming confessed, running a hand through his streaked hair. “I told them I had someone to bring them for the ball, but... I have no one.”
Lionel gasped theatrically, hand flying to his chest in mock horror. “Oh dear! The end of the world!”
Charming grinned, though the smile didn’t reach his eyes. “Don’t panic. I’ve got it under control. I think…”
“Is that why there was a handsome pirate rummaging through your wardrobe this morning?” he asked with a pointed look. “Is he part of your grand plan?”
Charming blinked, caught off guard. “He’s not that handsome,” he blurted out, the words leaving his mouth before he could stop them. Lionel’s amused smirk only deepened. Charming’s cheeks flushed. “I mean—he’s alright,” he backpedaled quickly, though Lionel’s knowing look said it all.
Lionel chuckled softly, tapping the flat of his sword against the ground. “What would your parents think of him, then? A pirate at the royal ball?”
“They did say every suitor in the kingdom that doesn’t exclude male or pirates. But they’d be terrified,”
“And here I thought you were planning to bring a princess,” Lionel mused, shaking his head with fond exasperation.
“Well, ‘pirate’ does start with a P,” Charming quipped, unable to suppress his grin. “Might be close enough. Don’t ask for permission ask for forgiveness.”
“The ball’s happening no matter what, Christopher. Your parents are set on it,” Lionel reminded him, though there was no judgment in his voice. He was used to the prince’s antics by now.
Charming nodded, tossing his fencing jacket aside. “Yeah, well, might as well make it a little more exciting.”
“If I’m going down, I’m going down singing.” The prince sang.
Lionel chuckled, stepping forward to ruffle the prince’s hair. “You’re always causing trouble. But… you're going to be fine, you always are.”
Charming laughed, a bit of the tension easing from his shoulders. “Thanks, Lionel.”
"Just... try not to start a royal scandal this time,"
"Can't make any promises," Charming shot back with a grin.
👑
The night had settled over Merlin Academy, and the castleteria was buzzing. On the lower level, students from various backgrounds sat together, some attempting to eat in peace while others whispered and laughed in tight-knit groups.
The second level, however, was a different story entirely—a separate, glass-enclosed space designed for royal students, a consequence of the infamous "Ariel incident" from freshman year. Uliana, the sea witch, had stirred up a food fight with the sophomore Little Mermaid herself, (A girl her older sister bullied aswell)
which ended with food flying and a lot of egos bruised. Now, extra security stood guard, and Charming hated it.
It drained his social battery to be so isolated. He used to enjoy mingling, making polite conversation with his peers, but now he found himself perched in this sterile room, looking down at the rest of the academy through the glass window like he was in some kind of fishbowl.
It didn’t help that Lionel, who usually provided some form of company, was off handling royal duties whenever it was mealtime. So Charming sat alone, poking at his food, waiting.
Well, not exactly alone. He was expecting someone. Or rather, a pirate . The word "victim" had crossed his mind, but that sounded too cruel, and blackmailee was just unpleasant. So, pirate it was.
Charming’s thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a scuffle outside the door. Voices—loud, irritated voices—drifted in, and he didn’t need to guess who it was.
“Let go of me! Easy on the coat!” came the familiar accent, sharp and indignant.
The guards were clearly manhandling Hook. Charming sighed, standing up from his seat and making his way to the door. He opened it just in time to see one of the guards tugging on Hook’s crimson coat, and Hook, true to form, looking royally pissed off.
“Stop it!” Charming barked, a little more forcefully than usual. “Let him go. He's with me.”
The two guards immediately released Hook, straightening up as they realized their mistake. One of them, the taller one with a stern face, glanced at Charming apologetically. “Apologies, Your Highness. We didn’t know he was—”
“Yeah, clearly,” Hook cut in, brushing off his coat like he’d just been dragged through the mud. “A real fine welcome, I must say.”
The other guard, younger and more nervous, muttered, “We thought he might’ve been here to, uh… cause trouble, Your Highness.”
Charming sighed, rubbing his temples. “He’s not here to cause trouble. I invited him.” He shot a look at Hook. “Sorry about the mix-up.”
Hook crossed his arms, glaring at the guards. “Way to go, Prince. You invite me, then forget to tell your people I’m coming. Real nice lad, aren’t you?”
Charming gave him a sheepish look, stepping forward and placing a hand on Hook’s shoulder—more of a placating gesture than anything. “I said I was sorry.”
Hook immediately shrugged off his hand, the familiar click of his hook against Charming's wrist. “Easy on the coat. You and your lot have already helped it deteriorate faster than it should.”
“Shall we?” he said, gesturing toward the table.
Hook huffed in response but said nothing, striding past the prince and into the dining area. His eyes scanned the lavish room, taking in the gleaming chandeliers, the velvet-lined chairs, and the royal setup. For a moment, Charming saw a flicker of appreciation cross his face—just for a second—before Hook’s usual facade of nonchalance slipped back into place.
“Nice place you’ve got here,” Hook said, though the casual tone didn’t quite match the look in his eyes. “Bit excessive for a meal, don’t you think?”
Charming smirked, crossing his arms as he followed Hook inside. He could see through the pirate’s act. “If it hadn’t been for that food fight with Ariel and your friend during freshman year, none of this would’ve happened.”
“Yeah, well, she was pretty awesome for that.”
Charming rolled his eyes, though a small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “Right. Let’s just sit and eat before you start a revolution in here too.”
They settled into their seats, a tense silence hanging between them. Charming could feel the weight of Hook’s gaze, sharp and calculating. This wasn’t some casual dinner. Both of them knew it, even if neither wanted to admit it.
The dinner had been silent for too long. Hook, never one to let tension sit without poking at it, decided to break it “So, what are your intentions, Your Highness? You’re a popular bloke around here. Getting lonely?”
Charming’s fork paused mid-air before he set it down, carefully. “I have friends.” His mind flickered to Aladdin and Jasmine, who often joined him for meals, bringing stories of their magic carpets adventures.
Then there were Ella and Bridget, after the two got together they always found time to drop by with baked treats—often enchanted with strange, unpredictable side effects, like turning his hair fully blue or making him float for a few minutes.
Zelly, ever the life of the party, would bring her chameleon Pascal, and they’d all end up doing karaoke. After all, the royal dining area inexplicably had a karaoke machine tucked in the corner.
“So it’s not loneliness or complete boredom, why have me here?” Hook pressed.
Charming hesitated, trying to maintain a mysterious air. He knew Hook was too clever to show his cards too early. “I have something to ask,” was all he said, keeping his tone casual.
Hook leaned back, a smirk playing on his lips as he lounged in the velvet chair, clearly amused by the prince’s attempt at suspense. “What’s this all about, then? A royal invitation for little old me? You're not planning on throwing me in the dungeons after dessert, are you?”
Charming chuckled, though there was a hint of nervousness behind it. “No dungeons. Just… an arrangement.” He felt Hook’s guard go up instantly, the pirate’s smirk hardening into something more defensive.
“Arrangement?” Hook’s brow arched in mock curiosity, though there was no mistaking the sharpness in his tone. “What sort of arrangement would a prince want from moi ?”
“I need you to be my date,” Charming said, the words slipping out before he could fully gather his nerve. He paused, seeing Hook’s expression shift, and hurried to clarify, “Not in the traditional sense.”
Hook’s face didn’t change much. He leaned in slightly, his gaze sharp, like he was toying with a fish on a hook. “You went to so much trouble to impress me,” Hook said with snobbish amusement, “I’m flattered, but you’re not my type.”
Charming felt his face flush but pushed on. “My parents are throwing me this stupid ball, and I hate it. It’s all about me, and I just—” He suddenly found himself unraveling, words tumbling out in a rush. “I blurted out that I had a date, thinking it would stop them from pressuring me, but now it’s just worse, and I don’t know how to—”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold your horses, Prince,” Hook interrupted with a bemused smirk, holding up his hand. “That’s a lot of whining for me.”
Charming blinked, startled by Hook’s bluntness. Somehow, those few words snapped him out of his spiraling rant. He let out an embarrassed laugh, the tension easing from his shoulders. For a second, he found himself thinking Hook looked oddly…kinda hot.
The pirate, for all his snark, had an air of control about him that made Charming’s stomach twist in a way he didn’t quite understand.
But Hook was getting up, clearly looking like he was about to leave. He couldn’t let him just walk out, not after coming this far. Desperation flickered in his chest, and he scrambled for a last-ditch effort.
“Wait!” Charming stood quickly, his hand brushing against Hook’s arm as he reached out. “I haven’t told you the benefits yet.”
Hook paused, turning halfway with a knowing gleam in his eyes. “Alright. I’m listening.”
Charming exhaled, thinking quickly. “You’ll get lots of opportunities being seen with me. The ball is in two days. You won’t have to pretend for long. You’ll get to live lavishly, and you don’t have to worry about me telling anyone about your… thieving incident.”
Hook’s eyes flickered, but instead of biting, he turned fully away, stepping toward the door. Charming felt his heart sink. He'd blown it. This was going to be harder than he thought—time for Plan B, whatever that was.
Then, Hook stopped, glancing over his shoulder with a smirk that made Charming’s pulse quicken. “I’ll do it.”
“What?”
“I said I’ll do it,” Hook repeated, turning fully now, his expression unreadable. “I’ll be your boyfriend. For rent, of course.”
Charming bristled slightly. “That doesn’t sound very nice.”
“Well, that’s the reality, babe,” Hook teased, the last word slipping off his tongue like a taunt. The prince stiffened at the word. He didn’t like the way it sounded coming from Hook’s mouth. Or maybe he liked it too much, and that was the problem.
“Fine, we’ll talk tomorrow, lay down the ground rules. We can discuss everything over breakfast.”
“Blah, blah, so boring. You don’t need so many pleasantries to fake-date me, you know. We’re not writing a treaty.”
Charming stepped closer, his face inching into Hook’s space. “I’ll pick you up in the morning. We’ll discuss the plan then.”
Hook gave him a mocking grin, eyes flicking down between them before meeting Charming’s gaze again. “You just love a good scheme and a meal, don’t you? That’s pathetic—and kinda cute, actually.”
Something inside Charming snapped at that last line. “Who are you calling pathetic?” he growled, stepping even closer until they were face to face.
Hook’s eyes danced with amusement, but there was something else beneath the surface, something unreadable. For a brief moment, they stood there in awkward silence, close enough to feel each other’s breaths, their hands grazing.
The bell rang suddenly, cutting through the moment and pulling them back to reality. Charming took a step back, clearing his throat. “I’ll see you tomorrow?” He asked, his princely demeanor slipping back into place, though his voice was quieter than before.
Hook smirked, already slipping toward the door. “You know where to find me, Your Highness .”
Charming was still screwed how was he going to pull this sham? But he did make some progress he just hoped the pirate didn’t cause too much trouble.
👑
Notes:
Hope you enjoy the fic & Remember to give feedback!!! It is always appreciated. The fate of this fic is in y'alls hands its up to all of you whether this continues. (And if you reading this on tumblr. Thank you so much for giving this a read.) Request go here on my tumblr.
#gay#gay fanfiction#disney#disney movies#lgbt#descendants#hook descendants#captain hook#joshua colley#fanfic#ao3#dead boy detectives#descendants fanfiction#descendants 4#rise of red#the rise of red#Spotify#prince charming#tristan padil#captain charming#once upon a time#hook x charming#brandy cinderella#descendants hook#descendants charming#SoundCloud
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10 Characters, 10 Fandoms more
Oh no @pinayelf has tagged me again so I'll have to do another set! :"(
(thank you Ellie! I already did one and I was crying because I left out characters, here it is if you or anyone wants to read it)
Tagging: @aimee-maroux @everythingispoetry @owlask @raflesia65 @morgandarcyarts @sapphireangelbunny @idolsgf @zenstrike @rowanisawriter and YOU!
1. Sir Gawain
We stan a bi king (in the poem he kisses the Lord THRICE. Out of his own will. In another he kisses Lancelot. On his lips.). I love Gawain in any declination, Arthurian cycle, medieval poems, Merlin and the latest movie. I put Dave Patel because visually it's the one that I like the most, but give me a Gawain and I'll like him.
2. Boromir - Lord of the Rings
I spent half my life hating him, then I REALISED. And now he's my sweet pea the apple of my eyes I love him and I'll defend him. Movie kinda did him dirty, but AAAAAH.
3. Beatrice - Much Ado About Nothing
Fiercely loyal sarcastic queen who can and will stand up to herself. I love her. Absolutely flawless.
4. Chrisjen Avasarala - The Expanse
She's everything and I love her more than words can say. Old professional lady cursing like a sailor and speaking her mind clearly. Was very torn between putting her or Ripley in the first batch, but Ripley got precedence out of seniority of my obsession. I couldn't suggest you (anyone you are reading) this show enough, and she is one of the big reasons (she and Bobbie. I love Bobbie <3).
5. Evie Carnahan - the Mummy
She's everything and I will fight for her.
6. Kronk - Emperor's New Groove
I quote this movie more than it would be healthy to do. Yzma comes a close second but it's him.
7. Madalena - Galavant
I stood there 10 minutes trying to decide whether to put her or King Richard. But this single scene was the one that made me fall in love with the show and how it turns tropes around and so yeah. This list was short of villains, furthermore and she is everything, go slay, queen.
8. Jasper Fahey - Grishaverse
As previously stated, you give me a chaotic blorbo with a flair for theatrics and I'm yours forever.
(another fave is Nikolaj, but here goes Jasper because you know. Less tsarism involved.)
9. Martha Jones - Doctor Who
Martha deserved so much better than what the show and the fandom gave her. She's a great character, she's strong and compassionate and kind and honestly she did it right in leaving the Doctor (here's a video essay of a person better informed than me). I am so sorry, but I don't like Rose all that much, particularly in the season with Tennant and I'm on the Justice for Martha squad.
10. Korra - Avatar: the Legend of Korra
I know her show has flaws. But her as a character IS NOT.
Again, I needed to have figures to deconstruct the trope of "strong girl" and she's it. I love her arc and how she needs to deconstruct herself to proceed.
(I love also Tenzin, Tenzin is my favourite and my love, but his character arc is to me slightly less compelling)
(don't ask me to choose just ONE character from ATLA, I can't, I'll stay stuck for two hours trying to decide whom I like best and end up running away screaming because I can't.)
On a book level I must add: Margarita from Master and Margarita. That book is my obsession and the reason I ended up studying russian literature and language. -even if Bulgakov was actually Ukrainian but guess how many people told me so and I won't start here on the subject)
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So I watched Cursed by Light for the first time yesterday (even though I started watching sds circa 2017, I'm just late to the game🤪) and I have so many thoughts !! Might do more analysis later, but here's my initial thoughts
I NEED more Meliodas and Zeldris interactions like it is a NECESSITY
Elizabeth was so badass in this movie I love her and it made me want to see "Bloody Ellie" even more omg
On the topic of Elizabeth, I love her bc she's such a girls' girl. Like, find her a woman, and they will be besties. I mean Merlin, Diane, Elaine, Gelda, even Derieri - she's just such a girl lover !!
And it's pride month so legally, everyone has to agree with bi!Elizabeth... jk... kinda lol (honestly every single sin is queer in my head, im prohecting my queer onto all nnt char)
Cursed by Light DEFINITELY best movie like hands down
BUT I actually kinda wish that the Supreme deity plotline was part of the show rather than a one off movie
Like I want it as a season. I feel like her character had so much potential not only for cool plots and battles, not only for the resurrection of the goddess race and the problems that would cause, but also for Elizabeth's emotional and physical/power arc
Anyway I will be thinking of at least a half season to combat the SD, complete with flashback to and before the Holy War and Elizabeth defeating her mother with those famed goddess powers that the demon race was so afraid of
And of course, within this season would be lots of brother bonding, and a large amount of time set in the demon realm where we get to explore the society and world, along more with the demon bros' past as individuals and together
Meliodas atones for both his betrayal of his brother, and that of his people who he probably should have been protecting
Plus maybe some gowther (bc I love him) and original demon lore bc that would be cool
#tess rambles#demon bros#supreme deity#goddess elizabeth#bamf!elizabeth#demon mel is best mel#seven deadly sins#nnt#7ds#demon king#gowther#nanatsu no taizai#elizabeth liones#elizabeth nnt#nnt headcanons#original demon#chandler#cusack#zeldris#melizabeth#geldris#diane nnt#derieri#elaine nnt#cursed by light
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Gilgamesh for ask meme!
Hi!!! Thank you for messaging me ☺ I really appreciate it! It's been a long time since I did askmeme on gilgablog so thank you for requesting him (i keep most fate thoughts private)! Sorry I will probably write a whole massive paragraph about him XD
My Gilgamesh opinions are very subjective here so they may not all be accurate, which is why I enjoy this ask a lot ^^
Sexuality Headcanon: I headcanon him as bi/pan, like yeah there's no denying he is also attracted to women, but his devotional relationship with Enkidu and kinky pleasure yuetsu time with Kirei is every bit as canon in my opinion!!!
Even his creepy obsession with Saber really hints to me personally that Gilgamesh may not discern his initial sense of attraction primarily by gender- I believe he may be attracted to people based off intangible traits that link to his personal sense of values as well; which cannot be as simply measured as gender.
So in my opinion GILGAMESH IS RATED E FOR EVERYONE!
Gender Headcanon: Though he is masc, man he/him I also feel as if Gilgamesh's gender is also just 'GILGAMESH'. Sometimes I wonder if Gilgamesh would see himself as beyond the convention of gender.
Also I heard from someone that gender can be very diverse in Ancient Mesopotamia so it would be really cool to see where Gilgamesh would slot his gender identity there... also can his pronouns be king of heroes/ king as well! I feel like he really defines himself by his role more than gender per se, and in one fate hanafuda game he says gender doesn't matter ☺👍
An OTP: ohh I love Gilgamesh ships so much 😊😊 Gilkidu is just so amazing in many ways I cannot even describe, Kotogil is incredible in their twisted dynamic .. and GilHaku is just so beautiful! And I love Gilgamesh x Merlin for the shenanigans... to be honest most Gilgamesh ships are my otp. I even really like Gilgamesh x reader/ oc fics and Ritsuka/ Guda ones depending on what the ocs are like! Oh I also like Gilgamesh x Cu as they can clash head on and go wild, as well as Gilgamesh x Ozymandias!
And a mutual introduced me to Achilles x Gilgamesh. I think it is a beautiful pairing as they have so much grief, love, power and arrogance in common.
A NOTP: I'm sorry Gilgamesh x Saber fans. I respect those who ship it but Gilgamesh is such a creep to Saber in my opinion, I like it when she doms him to smithereens and stomps on his pride though ☺🥳🥳🥳
BROTP: This is a hard one as I feel like his otps can be good otps, but seeing him hang out with Iskandar is always hilarious. Love how he actually listens to Taiga in the spin off games as well, so they could maybe enjoy a few drinks together. And Gilgamesh/Solomon/Merlin makes for great chaos.
Gilgamesh/Siduri/Enkidu is a powerful alliance and err what else... I feel like as long as they can entertain one another then Gilgamesh has the potential for many BROTPS.
Random Headcanon: He has golden nipple tassels that he unleashes whenever he has an urge to go full sexy, also I feel like though yes he does love pleasure and decadent desires the way he so tightly constrains and punishes himself sometimes makes me wonder if some of his hedonism is also used as a way to appear as an overwhelming figure to others.
I feel like Gilgamesh is definitely tyrannical and extremely powerful and charismatic... yet also has a side to him that is insecure as hell, his larger than life and genuine powerful and wise sides overcompensating for a side of him that is plagued with all sorts of self loathing and grief.
General opinion: I love this asshole!!!!!!!! Endless joy can be created from researching his character and reading, watching his materials, he is entertaining in such a wide variety of ways, and every side of him is a marvel to witness (though i wanna punch him sometimes too cuz holy crap is he horrendous at times).
He's a very complex and nuanced character that can be interpreted in a wide variety of ways so I am really irritated by how some people try to gatekeep Gilgamesh's character and throw him into a box, when Gilgamesh is such a versatile character! I hope that there will continue to be a space where people can enjoy Gilgamesh in as many different ways as possible, without there having to be some sort of 'fandom consensus' on which Gilgamesh opinions are most valid.
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Okay, if you were asked who are in Merlin BBC & Voltron that you can see based on canon that are gay/bi/pan/demi, which characters are they? Why?
What a fun ask I'm totally not doing to procastinate on cooking... XD
BBC Merlin
Arthur Pendragon is, in my head, demiromantic and bisexual... It sort of depends on the circumstances/episode. Arthur needs a very long time to really feel connections with people and only starts to consider love after he really gets to know them, hence his constant search for true love in the show. With Merlin I'm not entirely sure if he was attracted to him instantly, strangely enough feeling a connection from the moment they met, or if it takes him till the end of the series when Merlin confesses his magic and finally shows his true self to realise the depth of his feelings.
Merlin is, well... Bi Bi Bi. A disaster bi in fact. With a preference for sweaty men in metal boxes, he's not very peculiar. However, Merlin is a one person hyperfixation kind of guy. Most people are convinced that Merlin's gay.
Gwen: I feel like most people in BBC Merlin are bi and Gwen is no exception. Like Merlin, she prefers the hero type in metal uniforms. But she also had a thing for Morgana in the beginning.
Morgana: lesbian. I have never seen a woman so disinterested in men, I'm not surprised that they casted Katie McGrath in supergirl as supergirls love interest. I might settle for homoromantic and asexual. But definitly in love with Gwen in the very beginning.
Sir Leon, my beloved, the immortal, the one and only, the eternal suffering aro/ace. I don't have to explain this one. The only counter moment is the Lamia episode where Leon suddenly develops interest in women out of nowhere. My personal take is that anyone could be fallen under a Lamia's spell, this one just had a taste for men (and male presenting).
Sir Elian: once upon a time I clocked them as nonbinary and sadly that's as far as I thought into this character. Pretty sure he's aromantic. He/they pronouns. I dunno, I don't think Elian would conform to anything if given a choice. Aromantic too, I think. Like Leon, there is no interest there, but he does play around with Percival and Gwaine quite often, so I'd take that as allosexual.
I am excluding Gwaine because I think canon Gwaine is written as a straight oblivious fuckboy. Albeit a kind one XD fanon Gwaine is often poly/ pan... Or into apples. Lmao XD and I'm not sure about Percival because the man has a dead wife and kids.
Voltron
Keith: with his lack of interest in women, he can only be gay. That man looks at no one quite the same as he looks at Lance. what the hell was the whole bonding thing if not a hint for post canon klance? Sorry, not sorry XD rivals to best friends to lovers.
Lance: *bi bo bi* bisexual lighting Lance. Doesn't matter if you prefer klance or shallura, this man is a walking bi flag. I don't know what you mean by proof, just look at this wiggly boy with the fingerguns. He can't even sit straight! Can't do math either. He's perfect!
Shiro: probably the only character in my entire history of shipping that I would unqueer without feeling bad about it. I know he's gay, I just don't really see it in the writing. Of course there aren't always clear signs that someone is gay which is why this is good rep actually (+he's married), but you asked me for proof in the show and all I see is that this man is a dad. That's his gender and his orientation and that's all I really need to know.
Pidge: aro/ace because I love my aroaces and this child loves robots and robots only. Also nonbinary/genderqueer. Pronouns: fuck/off XD
I think Lotor should have been bi. Pre-canon Lotor had us Langsters ship Lotor x Lance and it was so much fun :D
Bob: gender: evil, orientation: villain. I hate this guy
Coran: the georgous man is either gay or pan. More likely pan because I vaguely remember he had a son?
I hope I answered your question reasonably enough XD thank you for the ask, anon :3
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1: Magic is a Metaphor < 2: Morgana is a Lesbian > 3: Merlin is Gay > 4: Arthur is Bi
Building off of the whole metaphor idea, Morgana's character arc is basically that she starts to question her identity because she's having all of these dreams and thoughts that she doesn't understand. Then Gaius, who is straight up a conversion therapist, literally gaslights her and is like, 'no no, you're just going crazy, you're overreacting, here, why don't you take all of these drugs to suppress those thoughts?'
Meanwhile, Uther is saying all of this stuff about how sorcerers are all evil and should be killed, and Morgana will try to argue with him and he will just be like, 'well, why do you care so much?' And she's all, 'oh, no reason. I'm just an ally. I'm just really passionate about social justice.' Like, girl, we've all been there.
And then once Morgana does come to terms with her identity and she realises how fucked up the way that she was treated is, she goes batshit and starts a revolution and assassinates her dad. And good for her! I honestly think that all repressed lesbians deserve a little bit of murder, it's only fair, especially if they look so hot doing it.
Also, Morgana doesn't have any male love interests. I mean, she will sometimes flirt with men to manipulate them into doing what she wants, but it's very clear that that is what she is doing, she never actually cares about them or follows through.
Besides, Katie McGrath has never played a heterosexual in her life. She's basically straight up said that she played Morgana as a lesbian. You know where she said that? Here:
Hear me out.
Are they technically half-sisters? Yes. But omg the sexual tension between these two is undeniable. You really do think that they're just going to kiss at any given moment. This has been straight up confirmed. This is a quote from the same conversation as earlier between the main producer and Katie McGrath, where they fully admit that there are definitely lesbian undertones there, and not only did both actresses play it that way, but it was written that way. So I rest my case.
Gwen knew about Morgana's prophetic visions from the start and she was never scared of it or tried to deny that it was magic. Instead, she was always by Morgana's bedside (or in her bed) so she could hold her face and stroke her hair and tell her she would be okay. Gayasses.
Although, as Iori Miyazawa can attest, yuri is often best found in the absence of it. Because once Morgana accepts her identity and her magic becomes an unavoidable part of of her life rather than thoughts she could repress, she begins to push Gwen away, often in the form of telling her not to undress her anymore.
Then this tension between them is emphasised when Morgana starts having nightmares of Gwen marrying Arthur and is really upset by it for some reason. I know that she justifies it by saying that she doesn't want Gwen to take her place as queen, but if you think about that for more than 5 seconds, it makes absolutely no sense. Arthur is still going to be king regardless of who he marries, so unless Morgana is planning to follow the legend a bit too closely and marry her brother, then Gwen is absolutely not taking her place.
And yet Morgana spends the entire rest of the show obsessing over Gwen, including: planting false evidence to break up Gwen and Arthur, using necroLancey as a puppet to seduce her, kidnapping Gwen only to tenderly caress her face and force her to have dinner with her, and then of course enchanting Gwen to kill Arthur so that Morgana can be queen, and Gwen will seemingly also still be queen. And they will be two queens, together, platonically. Hmmm
#now with an added morgwen slide since I didn't have it when I first made this (like 2 years ago now) because I had not yet been enlightened#morgana pendragon#morgwen#morgcest#merlin meta#bbc merlin#merlin#the magic of metaphor
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Hello, happy sunday everyone!
i've accepted the fact that i probably won't finish my fifth year date wip any time soon, so i've started working on other wips as well. at this point it's still just the main plot ideas and some conversations/scenes that i already have planned, so here are six out-of-context sentences from different wips.
I can tell Simon is thinking —he always makes this adorable frowny face when he does—, and I know it’s probably got to do with my lack of responsiveness.
His girlfriend better know how lucky she is to have him.
Now he’s crying, and I’m crying, and we probably look really gross, and I'm pretty sure [REDACTED] is still recording, but I honestly couldn’t care any less right now.
“What? I’m hot. It’s not like I can open the window without you making a fuss.”
I know how pathetic this is, but I feel like I'm gonna lose my mind if I go another day without seeing Simon.
About half an hour later, I’m just staring at my notebook when I hear him stomping up the stairs, so I quickly grab the closest book on my desk and pretend to be reading, to make it look like I’m actually busy. Merlin, what has become of me.
tags and hellos (also i hope y'all are having a cooler day, because it's so hot for me right now): @sosoapi @ebbpettier @larkral @aroace-genderfluid-sheep @onepintobean @ic3-que3n @her-smile-forges-galaxies @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @artsyunderstudy @raenestee @valeffelees @blackberrysummerblog @enbysiriusblack @queerdeadwizards @wellbelesbian @ileadacharmedlife @thewholelemon @facewithoutheart @captain-aralias @cutestkilla @chen-chen-chen-again-chen @shrekgogurt @jasonfunderberkerthefrogexists @bazzybelle @confused-bi-queer @asocialpessimist @twinkle-twinkle-up-above @orange-peony @whogaveyoupermission <33
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Final finished with the last book in the series!
1. First of all, I want to say WOMEN 🛐🛐🛐. All of them are wonderful, badass, legendary, absolute icon. If it weren't for the women in the series, Tedros can kiss his crown goodbye lmao.
2. Baby Merlin is an absolute cutie I wished he stayed that way longer. Calling Aggie Momma — aghagah my heart
3. The gays win in this one y'all! Japeth and Aric confirmed and when Japeth asked for that kiss — I was holding my breath, I was anticipating it. I needed it. I'm so disappointed that it was actually Tedros 😭 Then there's Anadil and Hester being wives since day 1 with unconventional love confession. Tedros basically admitted to being bi, William and his bf I forgot the name. Love all of them omg.
4. My favourite scene in the book is probably Sophie's scream that almost killed Japeth. Like go Queen! And speaking of Sophie, my wife has many amazing and badass moments as she should (her ripping the scim from her ear also deserve a standing ovation. Truly witch of the woods beyond.)
5. Hort and Sophie relationships are better and i understand why people ship them... But I still would prefer if he was dead lmao. They're cute but maybe I'm not feeling them since I'm still hung up on Rhian.
6. Overall though, I actually enjoy this less than the other books. Idk why, maybe because it's the last or that it's so packed with action that we didn't really get any relationship moments. Or maybe I'm just sad that it's over but it's still satisfying to read about the characters and I'm happy with how it all ends. I certainly love The Camelot Year more than the school year. So I give this one 3 stars.
Okay, maybe there's clear things about what I don't like
1) I think Japeth and Rhian being Rafal's son made sense but at the same time it don't. Like... I really don't like the way people are randomly sleeping around in this one. I can't imagine Rafal messing with Evelyn, I can't imagine Arthur and Lady Gremlaine literally doing it a day before his wedding. It just rub me the wrong way
2) they pushed Japeth in the background when I found him and his brother as villian really interesting and different. But now instead of going against Japeth, it's about solving the Quests so we don't really get any development on Japeth which is a shame (and the way he dies is so anticlimactic it's not even satisfying)
3) it focused on Tedros too much and I liked him but not enough lmao (probably the reason I love book 5 so much, he's barely in that).
4) Again, the actions are so packed and sometimes repetitive (Sophie's chapter finding the sword and then we turn to Agatha's chapter and find the same revelation).
5) when that crown land on Agatha, I really wished she was crowned for real at that moment instead ngl.
6) the pacing and the setting? We are going left and right from one adventure to the next and in my previous review I said i don't quite like adventure books with traveling and stuff. I found book 4 interesting and book 5 grounded but this one is just all over the place, I can't always keep up what's actually happen. Maybe this one is just me.
If I have to rank the book
1) A Crystal of Time
2) A World Without Princes
3) Quest for Glory
4) The Last Ever After
5) School for Good and Evil
6) One True King
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