#Mannequin getting clowned on

[cairavende]

Worm Arc 12 thoughts:

Brian needs to watch the Barbie movie holy shit! (I understand the story takes place in 2011 and the movie doesn't exist there)

Just like, fuck get off Taylor's back. She is playing it too safe but also being too aggressive. Moving too fast but also not being aggressive enough! AHHHHHHHH!

Seriously, nearly every time Brian showed up in this arc I was yelling at him. Dude. Just back off.

Skitter fucking just, killing thousands of rats in a few minutes is absolutely terrifying. God I love her.

Hookwolf is a dick. I can't believe everyone else went along with him and gave the Travelers and the Undersiders shitty choices like that. I mean that's not true, I can believe it I'm just mad.

I legit forgot Imp existed until Tattletale mentioned leaving her at the meeting as a spy. I love how the way her power works combined with the writing style means she just disappears for the readers as well.

Loved seeing more of the Travelers and more Noelle. Excited to learn more about her (I don't have great feelings about her long term situation though).

Jack is such a fucking POSER oh my god!

He just. He thinks he's so cool. But he's not. Fucking "this is not an exit" reference and shit.

He is Tobey Maguire Spider-Man from Spider-Man 3. Just thinks he is the coolest shit. Everyone just has to accept it cause he got fancy knife powers.

Tattletale just fucking full confidence fucking with the Nine while standing right in front of them. She clearly knew it was high risk but she took it and she got results, spoiling Jacks plan with Cheri and shit.

That said, AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! MY BABY SOMEBODY HELP MY BABY! AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! (Ok she's not like, my baby, that's Taylor. But she's still my baby.)

LOOK AT MY FUCKING DAUGHTER! FUCKING LOOK AT HER! HOW MANY PEOPLE DID SHE SAVE FROM SHATTERBIRD? HUNDREDS? THOUSANDS? SHE IS AMAZING!

She fucking needs therapy though. Saves more people than anyone else could have and is mad because she didn't do enough. God damn Taylor love yourself!

Danny is fine. Besides, he had warning so any injures are basically his fault. Git gud Danny. (Ok look that's a little unfair, but he messed up pretty bad with raising my daughter so I'm allowed to be a little unfair to him I think.)

And look at my daughter again! She goes and organizes people to help the wounded. Takes charge. Gets a cool butch lady that might never show up again to help. I hope she does show up again though.

AND THEN FUCKING MANNEQUIN! AAAAHHHHHH!!!!!

After he showed up I said "I don't know how the fuck she's gonna do it, but my daughter is gonna kick your ass". And then like a few paragraphs later I read "I have no idea how the fuck I’m going to do it but I’m going to make you regret that." This made me both happy - fun to say something and have Taylor say almost the same thing - and worried - cause when I said I didn't know how she was going to do it I kinda hoped she had a plan.

But then she fucking does it! She kicks his ass. She steals his arm. SHE RIPS HIS HEAD OFF! GOD DAMN! THAT'S MY FUCKING KID!

I do think she should hire the buff burly guy who helped her rip Mannequin's head off. He clearly has motivation and would be loyal. And maybe I want to see him more. For reasons.

But anyway she fucking wrecks Mannequin, makes him look like he lost a fight with a paint store. Just fucking clowned on him. She is so good.

Then the next day Brian comes in and fully focuses on how stupid it was to fight Mannequin, not really praising that she won or asking if she needs medical help. God damn bud!

But I loved how a fuck ton of people were like "Oh shit she beat Mannequin! I want to work for her." She's going to be so fucking famous soon.

Interlude 1 - Jack is a poser again. Sucks to be the Merchants, can't say I'll miss them. Jack trying to sound all clever with his carrot and sticks thing, but most of what he lists for the other Nine is really obvious. And he misses some stuff as well. Poser. I could lead the Nine better than him (not that I would lead the Nine, just that if I did I would be better than Jack).

Interlude 2 - God damn this is a doozy. Shit ton of Cauldron lore. Battery backstory. Assault backstory. I made a "now kith" joke when they fought for the very first time cause I didn't realize who they were yet. It was supposed to be a joke. I did not want them to end up together. They should not be together. Legend should not have allowed Assault to be on Battery's team. He was a bit of a dick for that. So much Cauldron lore though. I can't put it all here.

[2-dsimp]

Yandere clown humiliates your mean ex and makes you laugh

[Y̾AͣN̾TͭOͦB𞀓EͤRͬ DͩAͣY̾ 5 Iͥmͫaͣg̾iͥn̾eͤ: K̾iͥl̾l̾eͤrͬ Cͨl̾oͦw𞀞n̾ f̾tͭ!]

•:•.•:•.••:•:•:•:•☾☼☽•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:•:•:

Cw: suggestive! Cannibalism, possessive/obsessive tendencies, Pyrok hates your ex-boyfriend and wants to eat him.

Synopsis: All you wanted was an antique doll from the antique store that was down the road from your home. But instead you get a murderous alien killer clown doll instead. With a long line of history for being known as the boogeyman who terrorized the districts of Devildom centuries ago.

•:•.•:•.••:•:•:•:•☾☼☽•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:•:•:

Thinking about a yandere Killer Clown! that was hexed by a powerful mage centuries ago for going on a killing spree. Cannibalizing the townsfolk like the neighborhood boogeyman. Within Devildom and leaving a trail of gnawed bones and flesh.

Yandere Killer Clown! Cursed to be a doll, with his alien features wiped from his face so he’d be looking like a blank faced mannequin. While his features were transferred onto the plate masks of varying expressions adorning his hip belt. To be kept under lock n key, shipped straight to an antique shop. Where he laid wasting away for centuries with only a mean grudge to his name. Until you came and bought the box out of curiosity.

Yandere Killer Clown! Who at first plays pretend when you open the box. Remaining dead in his doll form just to get a picture of who exactly his new owner was. And whether or not he should kill you and run away now that he’s been freed. There were many nights where he had his blank face jutted down at you.

Sitting on your chest as you breathed whilst his porcelain hand pressed against his mask which shifted into a ravenous expression. Razor teeth jutting out, with a long tongues slithering from the bottomless hole within the masks holes. Eyes boring into you, Always waiting for a chance of when you’d neglect him. Or forget to shine his porcelain body and dress him up in his favorite frills everyday. Any excuse to get rid of you but so far there was nothing.

Yandere Killer Clown! Who after a couple weeks, grew too comfortable being hugged and fawned over in his stay with you. He always wore his happy mask when he was in your presence. However, every time you left and came back you noticed how his mask switched from happy to angry.

The masks soulless eyes seemed to be glaring at you with intensity as if knowing whatever sin you committed to warrant the clowns wrath. Yeah he knew all about that wretched ex boyfriend you kept going on and off with. And it made his hollowed brain rattle violently with murderous and envious thoughts.

Yandere Killer Clown! Who became a touch more realer with every laugh he coaxed from you lips. Whether it be by his switch up in masks. (which always left you with whiplash from how it was even possible for him to do that.) Or from his out of context voice lines that had a morbid humorous edge with insults for your ex-boyfriend.

“Tiny pecker, Tiny pecker, Exy has a tiny pecker! Chop it off, lest it don’t grow any bigger!”

The past few days you could never find peace as strange things had started happening around you. More specifically with the clown doll, every time you went to polish him he felt colder than usual. And his edgy joints were less prominent with a softer more flexible edge. The kicker was that whenever you’d go to sleep. You’d always feel something breathing on you. But you chalked it up to an air drift from the window you cracked open.

Yandere Killer Clown! Who is garbling ancient enchantments via mask. Which enabled him to have an outlet to express himself. As his pointed claws surgically traced his signature sigil on your chest. the happy mask’s manic grin started growing eerily wider. At seeing the reddened glow of his brand on you. Which made the bond you two shared to be completely permanent.

This new status would allow him much more freedom. To battle against the croons curse which had limited his former self. However, it was incomplete, it was one sidedly done after all. So he needed you to do the same onto him.

You needed to Let him in.

Thanks to your intervention in his life there was so much he wanted to do. First thing on the list would be getting rid of that old croon’s curse on his body once and for all. The second would be eliminating that ex boyfriend of yours.

And lastly…Having you to be his brood mother to repopulate his alienkind of was also one of his goals. After all you were the perfect fit. You’ve already shown such potential in being his mate, by tending to him everyday and night. He’d be sure to return the favor tenfold keep you well fed, protected, and cherished.

All you had to do was Let. Him. Inside of you.

——————/—————

A/n: Decided to make an attempt on doing spooky yantober entry XD

Lmk if y’all would want to see more of him. 👀

Also I think I’ve finally did all the yandere alphabet letters woohoo 🎉

[ybyag-lil]

Man, I truly love all the companions in BG3 and how much you can interact with them. They don't just sit there like a mannequin when you talk to people, they actively interact with the world and participate in conversations. They have things to say about things going on in the story if you talk to them, AND will react to your other companions personal issues!

But my favorite thing? The little things you can do with them.

Like the circus? Volunteering one of your companions to help the clown, where 2 of your companions will get approval because you didn't volunteer them and the one you did volunteer will be like "pls don't do this to me"? Talking to the dryiad there and testing your bond with your love interest? Taking Karlach to her parents grave?

I fucking love that. It adds so much to your relationship with them.

Not even mentioning the fact that each companion is a unique and interesting character that isn't just a blank state for your PC to [persuade] them the whole time. There have been moments where in a tense situation I won't intervene with a companions choice and let them chose what they feel is right. And it feels so gratifying to have them make their own decisions. Like yes! After years of doing someone elses bidding, decide your own path in life.

They didn't have to do all that.

But they did, and I love it.

[cece693]

Painted Devotion

pairing: the joker x male reader tags: male reader is a hero, joker is infatuated with you, no joker used in mind, the thought is there

The moment the SWAT team hauls him away, you think this is finally over—until you hear that cackling laugh echo through the paddy wagon window.

A few days pass. You immerse yourself in your usual hero duties—cleaning up small-time heists, taking down petty thugs. But it doesn’t escape your notice that you almost miss the Joker’s particular brand of chaos. There was something in his eyes that day, a wild, obsessive affection that went beyond the typical villain-hero dynamic.

You’re patrolling a dingy back alley near the Bowery when it happens again. A security guard from the Gotham Museum of Contemporary Art is doubled over, reeling from a sudden gas attack. The faint green haze around him makes your stomach churn; you’d know that Joker toxin anywhere. Instantly, your heart pounds. He’s out. He’s free. Or worse—this is part of his elaborate scheme to bait you again.

You slip into the museum through a shattered stained-glass window. The corridors are dim, silent except for your footsteps. Then you see it: a large neon sign mounted on the marble statue of the museum’s founder. The sign reads: “You hardly come to see me. So I brought my exhibit to YOU!” in swirling, chaotic letters. Around the base of the statue are clown-faced mannequins, each posing with various “Joker merchandise”—fake bombs, painted roses, over-sized playing cards.

A voice croons from above: “Hero? Heeeero, come out, come out, wherever you are…”

The Joker drops down from a second-floor balcony, landing with a theatrical flourish. He’s practically bouncing on his toes, as though he’s been waiting for this moment all night.

“Oh, I knew you’d show,” he says, a desperate glee flickering across his painted face. “After all, you always do. But you sure are taking your sweet time.” He adjusts his lapels, letting out a comically offended huff.

You glance around, searching for hostages or bombs. But surprisingly, you see none. Just the Joker, grinning from ear to ear, his eyes crinkled in a mix of frustration and delight.

He points a gloved finger at you, wagging it like a scolding parent. “I heard you had a run-in with…oh, what’s-his-name…Candlefly? Firefly? Some lesser insect who tried to torch a warehouse? He barely even had to set a building ablaze, and poof, you came running! Meanwhile, your dear Joker?” He clutches his heart, feigning heartbreak. “I have to pull the entire Gotham Philharmonic into a fish tank, or blow up half the Arkham library just to get you to glance my way!”

Stepping closer, you notice he’s trembling, excitement layered with genuine distress. It’s disturbing how you can practically feel his longing crackling in the air.

“Haven’t you been getting my letters?” he whines. “I’ve poured out my heart on stationery that cost a fortune! And that last ‘little gift’… you didn’t even thank me.” He pouts, lip jutting out like a petulant child. “Don’t you know how to accept a token of affection, or do I need to teach you some manners?”

Your brows furrow, keeping your guard up. “This isn’t how you show affe—”

He cuts you off with a playful stomp, then does an overdramatic twirl. “Oh, don’t you lecture me on love, hero! I try so hard. You ignore me, but you still find time for these losers instead of your dear Joker!” He narrows his eyes, voice wavering between mania and heartbreak. “It’s humiliating, you know.”

Despite the dangerous situation, you feel a twinge of pity. His feelings—warped though they are—seem undeniably genuine.

You stand your ground, trying to quell the swirl of sympathy. “Joker, people are getting hurt because of these stunts. Whatever…feelings you have, it doesn’t justify—”

“Feelings?” His manic grin twists into a desperate smile. “Oh, I have more than feelings, dear. I’m infatuated. Smitten. I want to see that lovely expression of shock on your face whenever I pop into your life. Isn’t that romantic?” He sighs dreamily, then cocks his head. “Don’t you like being wanted?”

Your jaw tightens. You can’t let him get under your skin. Instead, you try to see if he’s rigged the museum with explosives; it’d be typical Joker. You subtly shift your gaze, looking for signs.

He notices immediately. “Looking for bombs, are we?” he snickers. “No bombs this time. No guns. Just me.” A faltering grin paints his face. “I wanted to talk. Really talk. Because if I have to blow up another building to get your attention, well…” He shrugs, glancing away with an exaggerated wave of his hand. “I will, but I’d prefer not to. I want you all to myself, without those distractions.”

He slinks forward until there’s scarcely a foot between you. His gloved hand stretches out, almost daring to brush your chest.

“Is it really so hard to drop by Arkham for a chat? Maybe we could schedule a…date.” He laughs, though there’s desperation woven into his tone. “But no, you’re too busy chasing every nobody in Gotham. I suppose I’m just…unremarkable to you.”

He pouts again—really hamming it up—his voice taking on a whiny edge. “You don’t love me. You only show up out of obligation. It’s not fair.” You swallow hard. The tension is suffocating, a bizarre blend of comedic theatrics and real heartbreak. You have no illusions about his capacity for violence, but that undercurrent of raw longing is shaking your resolve.

“You can’t keep doing this,” you finally manage. “People are scared, Joker. They’re terrified. And you’re not giving me a choice but to respond.”

He giggles, shoulders bouncing. “Precisely! That’s the point, my dashing do-gooder! If the only way to see that handsome face of yours is to threaten the entire city, then so be it. I’ll do whatever it takes, because I— I— oh, you’ll laugh at me if I say it.”

He claps a hand over his face, peeking at you through splayed fingers. The sight would be comical if it weren’t so chilling. You stand there, arms tense at your sides, waiting for the next shoe to drop.

A moment later, he sighs heavily, dropping his hand. “But I have to say it: I love you, you stubborn, noble idiot! There! Now it’s out, for heaven’s sake. Laugh, scream, do what you want.” He throws his arms up, voice cracking with frustration. “But don’t you dare run off to fight some C-lister while I’m locked away again. I won’t stand for it, do you hear me? I won’t stand for it!”

As if on cue, the sirens outside begin wailing, bright red and blue lights swirling through the museum windows. The GCPD. They’ve arrived, no doubt alerted to the disturbance. Joker glances at the lights, then back at you, his expression torn between amusement and disappointment.

He exhales a broken laugh, lifting his hands in a theatrical surrender. “I guess our rendezvous is over.” He twists around, letting the cops see him, raising his arms as they enter. But even as the officers draw near, weapons trained, his attention remains locked on you.

Your mind spins with everything unsaid, everything you never dreamed you’d hear from the Clown Prince of Crime. He meets your gaze once more, a faint scowl on his lips.

“Next time,” he murmurs, “maybe you’ll come of your own accord.” He tilts his head, his voice turning whiny again. “Because I’m so sick of having to go through all. This. Trouble.”

The cops close in, cuffing his outstretched hands. Joker doesn’t protest; he simply grins—a delirious mixture of sadness and triumph. As they pull him away, he lets out a manic giggle, calling over his shoulder:

“I’ll be waiting, my sweet hero. I’ll keep sending gifts— and next time, you won’t ignore me, will you?”

The museum falls silent, the Joker’s cackle fading into the background as he’s led outside. Part of you is relieved it’s over. Another part knows it won’t ever truly be over—because for the Joker, you’re not just a heroic rival. You’re an obsession, a twisted muse, the one he can’t bear to be without… even if he has to destroy Gotham to make you come running.

[daisymbin]

32. "hold my hand—just until we get there, okay?" with dk 🥺🤏🏽❤️

oh my god i can so picture this 😭 this is so him!!!

request your own: full prompt list!

check out my masterlist! // seokmin's m.list

fluff prompt #32: "hold my hand—just until we get there, okay?"

"come on, it’ll be fun!" jeonghan’s voice rang out as he gleefully dragged you and seokmin toward the entrance of the horror-themed escape room. beside you, seungkwan was already cackling, clearly enjoying the prospect of watching everyone else scream.

"fun for you, maybe," you mumbled, clutching your bag tightly as the eerie music from inside the room echoed through the hall.

"oh, don’t be so dramatic," jeonghan teased, holding the door open like a villain welcoming his victims. "besides, you’ve got seokmin to keep you safe."

you glanced at seokmin, who was looking just as nervous as you felt. "i wouldn’t count on that," he muttered, his attempt at a smile faltering.

"seokmin can’t even protect himself," seungkwan added with a laugh. "remember the carnival? the animatronic clown?"

"don’t remind me," seokmin grumbled. "that clown was a menace."

you couldn’t help but laugh despite your nerves, and seokmin caught your smile, relaxing a little. "hey," he whispered, leaning close, "we’ll stick together, okay?"

"yeah," you said softly. "okay."

the escape room was worse than you imagined—dim lighting, creepy mannequins, sudden crashes, and faint whispers that made the hairs on your neck stand on end. you stayed close to seokmin, gripping his sleeve as tightly as you dared.

"this way!" jeonghan called, his confidence annoyingly intact as he led the group deeper into the maze. "there’s a clue in here somewhere."

"or a jump scare," seungkwan muttered, smirking as he bumped into you just to hear you yelp.

"seungkwan!" you hissed, clutching seokmin’s arm even tighter.

"what? i’m just helping you prepare," he said, clearly enjoying your misery.

"you’re terrible," seokmin mumbled, placing a protective hand on your shoulder. "come on, let’s just focus on getting out of here."

by the time you reached the last room, your nerves were completely shot. the narrow corridor leading to the exit was filled with mannequins, their blank faces illuminated by a flickering light. you froze, unable to take a step forward.

"nope," you whispered, gripping seokmin’s arm. "i can’t do it. there's no way I'm going in there."

"you have to," jeonghan said, clearly amused. "it’s the only way out."

"we’re right behind you," seungkwan added, though his teasing tone didn’t help.

"you don’t understand," you muttered, feeling your chest tighten. "i can’t."

seokmin turned to you, his own fear momentarily forgotten. "hey," he said softly, his voice steady despite the tremor in his hand. "i’m scared too, but…" he hesitated, then gently took your hand in his. "hold my hand—just until we get there, okay? to the exit."

your breath hitched at the warmth of his hand around yours. you glanced up at him, his nervous smile giving you just enough courage to nod. "okay."

"we’ll do it together," he promised, squeezing your hand lightly.

with seokmin leading the way, you slowly navigated through the corridor. every flicker of the lights and creak of the floorboards made you flinch, but seokmin never let go of your hand. he even cracked a few nervous jokes, his awkward attempts at humor earning a weak laugh from you.

"you’re doing great," he said as you reached the final door. "see? not so bad."

"i hate this," you muttered, but you couldn’t deny the comfort of his presence. "but… thanks."

his ears turned pink at your words.

when you finally stepped outside into the cool night air, you let out a relieved sigh. jeonghan and seungkwan immediately started rehashing their favorite moments, laughing at how scared you and seokmin had been.

"you two were so cute in there," seungkwan teased. "holding hands like it was a date or something."

"shut up," seokmin mumbled, his face turning bright red.

"don’t be shy," jeonghan added with a smirk. "you guys make a great team."

"seriously, can we not?" seokmin grumbled, but his hand lingered near yours as if he wasn’t quite ready to let go.

"you okay?" you asked, ignoring the teasing to focus on him.

he met your gaze, his expression softening. "yeah. im just… i'm just i’m really glad i was with you."

you felt your cheeks heat up, but you managed a small smile. "me too."

jeonghan and seungkwan exchanged knowing looks before walking ahead, leaving you and seokmin behind.

"so," seokmin said after a moment, his voice quieter now. "maybe next time, we can do something less terrifying? just the two of us?"

your heart skipped a beat at the way he looked at you, his shy smile making it impossible to say no. "i’d like that."

his hand brushed against yours as you walked to the car, the warmth of it lingering long after he finally let go.

[not-the-cheese]

one sentence(ish) summaries of every magnus archive episode PART 2

(eps 61-110) thank u for the funny comments and tags on the last part i love u guys

the rest of these may take a while as i've caught up to where i am currently in the podcast but i will finish them like in a month i promise

----

61. the thrilling sequel to man does not open coffin: man DOES open coffin.

62. surely this doctor can find an easier way to scam people out of money than putting them in a little book.

63. THE DARK ATE MY BROTHER IN LAW.

64. this is possibly the plot of laura croft tomb raider

65. mmm crumchy

66. what's the opposite of an unboxing video

67. as close to a coffeeshop au as you're going to get from this podcast

68. Doctors hate him! Man REFUSES to die from tuberculosis!

69. your college's psych department has the worst idea ever.

70. reverse death note

71. not even death will stop this woman from taking the british subway

72. man doesn't want to be low key racist in his last moments before getting eaten

73. police versus the second coming of dark jesus

74. lady is haunted by an ad for coffee

75. mike crew says "uh fuck it let's just put this guy on a skyscraper forever"

76. ryan from buzzfeed unsolved breaks into a train yard and suffers consequences

77. you're not a enough of a bitch to be my real mom

78. man gets harassed by his cousin and then exorcises him

79. you know that chase scene in scooby doo with the doors

80. stupid idiot motherfucking jurgen leitner

81. i have been personally victimized by the sequel to the hungry hungry caterpillar

82. pov: elias threatens to cancel you

83. mannequin takes matters into its own hands after people don't like its pitch for a new window display

84. a hoarder put newspaper on my friend's face :(

85. hey there's maybe a little man upon these stairs?

86. man gets got by a squiggly thing in the dark.

87. plumber is so oblivious to spooky happenings around him that it possibly saves his life.

88. guys i think this guy likes to dig

89. lesbian investment banker finds a new, less evil job: arson!

90. guy who turns people's bones starts a gym where he promises not to turn your bones! (he is lying)

91. i was stalked by lightning for 10 years and i all i got were these stupid scars

92. jonah magnus is a bad friend // another day another elias slay

93. ocd is no match for purple fuzz

94. let the bodies drop gently to the floor let the bodies drop gently to the floor

95. im so sorry my brain refuses to remember what the war ones were about but i think one guy got gently kissed on the forehead so that's pretty nice.

96. diversity wins! the not-quite-human delivery men who stole your identity and business are maybe gay?

97. man gets gaslighted by an entire town about a hole

98. 🎶mister sandman bring me a dream, actually don't, please stay far from me 🎶

99. another one bites the dust

100. archival assistants face off against the general public (they lose)

101. jon finally levels up high enough to unlock an eldritch horror's tragic backstory

102. LOCAL MAN MARRIES BUG

103. peppa eats a clown and they cover her in concrete instead of congratulating her.

104. pennywise stole my brother's skin

105. it's world war z baby

106. Something Big Is In Space.

107. man is interrogated about the time he saw thomas the train roasts people alive and also sans is there

108. actor is stalked by mask who liked his monologue so much that it tells its mask friends to come watch.

109. sometimes a family is just a serial killer's daughter and that guy who maybe killed some vampires

110. yeah man those spiders be eating

Part 1 |

[r0tting-rat]

DCA PROMPTOBER 2024

Attention! This slasher!au belong to the lovely @wyervan, who gave me the okay to write a little drabble about their murderous guys bc I'm simply obsessed with them. I hope I did them justice :>

Day 27 - Stalker

Pairing: Slasher!Sun and Moon x/& GN reader Warning: Blood, violence and gore, choking, drug mention Words: 3800+ Summary: It's Halloween and someone stops by to pay you a visit <3

Whoever said that serial killers are the real monsters of this world has probably never worked a minimum wage job at a diner during Halloween. Teenagers were a fucking pain, there was nothing to say about it. Between stupid pranks and annoying messes, they seemed to try and find every possible way to make your living life hell, like you were some kind of lifeless mannequin and not a waiter.

You often had the closing shift during the weekends, along with a coworker of yours, who was as insufferable and as bothersome as some of the teenagers who’d come in during the day. Jake was a douche, there wasn’t much to say; he was immature and lazy, multiple times he had found ways to shove his workload on you and other people, his cigarette breaks lasted longer than your lunch and he would flirt with every woman under 20 that would cross the threshold of the diner. You and he often worked the closing shift together, which meant you cleaned the kitchen and the tables as Jake called his girlfriend on his flip phone while mindlessly sweeping the floor, only managing to move dust bunnies and used napkins from one place to the other.

You heard his voice loud and clear from the kitchen, complaining about some guy who owed him money, when your ears suddenly picked up something you regretted hearing.

-Stop worrying about it, there’s no risk of him telling the cops, he’d get into a lot more trouble than me,- he laughed, -He’s addicted to that shit, he wouldn’t survive a week without me.-

You had heard from a coworker that Jake sold drugs to highschoolers, but you weren’t the type to believe rumors without any proof, so you had never cared much about it. Your eyes glanced up from the grill you were cleaning to see if Jake had noticed you listening in on his private conversation, but the man was too engrossed into pretending to do his job to notice you. You didn’t want to have anything to do with Jake’s deals, you wanted to keep out of his life as much as you didn’t want him to become a part of yours.

Suddenly, someone began knocking on the glass door of the bar, making it rattle loudly and echo through the small diner. You stopped and waited, until a second, louder knock startled you. Jake wasn’t going to open, was he?

You peeked out of the kitchen, looking for your coworker, but he must have disappeared somewhere in the back because you couldn’t see him anywhere in the dining area. He had left the broom behind, of course. 

Looking outside the diner and into the dark parking lot, you saw a tall man standing right in front of the door with a weird jester costume, waiting for someone to open the door for him. He was wearing red and yellow puffy striped pants, a yellow top with red ruffles, and a weird Halloween mask over his face—a white and golden smiling sun, with a crown of golden rays all around.

As soon as the man saw you he stopped slowly swaying on the spot, freezing, and his head tilted to the side in confusion. You had expected teenagers to come and bother you so late, considering it was the 31st, but a grown ass man wearing such a stupid costume? That was simply ridiculous. You tapped the sign on your side of the glass which read “CLOSED” in bold and red letters, but that seemed to not be enough for the clown.

-We don’t do trick or treating here,- you said, speaking loud enough so he could hear you from outside, -If you want candies how about knocking at the door of a house or something?-

The man’s shoulders shook with laughter, but you didn’t hear any sound coming from him, so you simply sighed and turned back towards the kitchen. You wanted to go home, drink something warm, and do a rewatch of the Scream trilogy, nothing else. Why couldn’t that asshole do the same?

The masked man slammed his hand on the glass, making you jump and turn back around, then he pointed towards the broom laying on the floor a few feet away from you. Something clicked in your head, and you stared at him with your mouth agape.

-Wait, are you here for Jake? Are you one of his friends or something?- you asked, and after a moment of hesitation, the man nodded eagerly. You gave him a better look, noticing exactly how much taller than you he was and his lean build—he didn’t fit the depiction of Jake’s clients. Most of them were highschoolers, as far as you were aware.

-Listen, I can’t let you in, but we’re almost closed, so you just wait a couple of minutes and he’s all yours,- you told the man, who gave you a grateful nod followed by a step back into the parking lot. Despite that, that guy unnerved you deeply, he was weird and creepy, and you didn’t want to have anything to do with him.

You decided you could tell Jake to go home and leave you the rest of the work—which you would have ended up doing even if he stayed there—just so you could get rid of the masked loser outside, but when you called his name, you didn’t hear any answer. You walked in the back of the diner, checking even the kitchen to make sure he wasn’t eating any of the leftover fries, but your coworker had disappeared into thin air. 

During your search you found the staff door wide open, letting in the cold night breeze, and when you tried to close it you found that the handle wasn’t working properly anymore. Every time you pushed it closed, the door would creak open once more.

-What the fuck…?-

A sudden sound made you jump out of your skin and turn around in search of the cause, finding only the silence of the dark diner answering back. You were getting uneasy, on edge, and you couldn’t stop thinking about the weirdo right outside the door. Right as you had begun to wonder if he had found a way to get in, a hand grabbed your shoulder and you screamed.

-Jesus, fuck!- yelled Jake as you flinched away from him, -What the hell is wrong with you?!-

Your heart was beating so loud you could hear it in your chest, hammering against your sternum like a drum, but when you saw your coworker standing right behind you, you sighed and relaxed.

-You scared me!- You shoved the man away, annoyed, and he reacted by looking at you like you had gotten crazy. -Go tell your stupid friend to leave, he’s creeping me out.-

-Who are you talking about?- he asked, and you rolled your eyes.

-Sun dude, with the mask and clown outfit? Doesn’t that ring a bell? He’s waiting for you outside.-

Jake’s brown furrowed in confusion, then he pushed you away to enter back into the dining area, where you had seen the masked guy. He looked outside, walking towards the glass windows that gave a clear view of the parking lot, which revealed to be completely empty. Jake turned around to glare at you like you had set your pants on fire. 

-Did you take something? Some shrooms?- he asked, and you sighed.

-No, he probably just left. That’s his van, I’m sure, it wasn’t there an hour ago.- You pointed at a white van parked not too far from the door in the parking lot. -Do you recognize it?-

Jake shook his head, still visibly confused by your behavior, and from his stance you could tell that he was also growing tense. His hands were fidgeting and his eyes were scanning the parking lot like a police car was about to pull up and arrest him any minute, but in the end he scoffed. 

-Nah. Whatever, I’m going home,- he said, walking away from the window, -I’m not in the mood for this stuff.-

-I’m serious, there was a guy there!- you replied, but the man didn’t listen, -Also, next time close the door behind you after you go out for a smoke.-

-I haven’t smoked in 3 hours,- Jake retorted, -What are you talking about now?-

-So you didn’t open the back door?- you asked after a pause, feeling a sense of chill spread in your guts, creeping up into your lungs and blocking your airway, -But it’s…?-

The door had been broken. From the outside. Someone had gotten in, and you didn’t even hear it, neither of you did. You and Jake seemed to realize the same thing at the same time, but just as you bolted towards your bag and grabbed your phone, which you had left behind the counter, Jake ran for the main door, slamming it open in a rush. 

-Wait, don’t!- you screamed, but the man didn’t listen to you and headed to his car, which was parked in a far corner of the parking lot. Before he could take more than two steps, the white van rumbled to life, pointing its headlights at him and blinding him in the process. 

-Come back inside!- you screamed, and luckily this time Jake seemed to be willing to listen to you, because as soon as he realized he was about to get run over, he threw himself back into the diner. You grabbed him by one of his wrists and dragged him with you in the kitchen, your only safe space for now. 

The kitchen wasn’t that big; the diner you worked at was just a small local business that had just enough seats for the small population of your town, therefore, there weren’t many places to hide. 

-What the fuck is happening?!- screamed Jake in a panic, but you shushed him, beginning to type the police’s number until a humming sound made you freeze on the spot, -Why did you stop?! We need to…-

-Down!- you hissed, ducking behind one of the grills and bringing Jake down with you, right as light steps echoed in the dining area which you had just left. You listened carefully, kneeling on the cold floor of the kitchen with Jake shaking beside you, one of your hands coming up to cover his mouth. 

Your ears picked on a masculine voice singing something reminding you of a lullaby, slow and gentle, melodic and raspy at the same time. The intruder was singing without a care in the world, entering the kitchen just to stop right on the threshold, lingering on the spot. You peeked your head out from the side of the fryer, trying to get a look at the man but only managing to see a pair of black boots and blue puffy pants covered in stars before your eye was caught by the hatchet he was holding in his gloved hand. Old, rusty, and clipped in many places around the edge, the weapon looked decades old, if not more. You saw the man swinging it mindlessly around, like he was playing with it, still humming that low tune with his deep voice. 

-Someone’s hiding,- he sang, mocking, -Someone’s scared!-

Struggling to keep yourself from making a sound, you hid back behind the fryer, hoping to the heavens that Jake wasn’t about to panic and rat you both out. You sent him a warning glare, but the man was too worried about stopping his hands from trembling to even look in your direction. 

-Which little mouse will have its tail chopped off today, mh?- asked the intruder, beginning to walk slowly around the kitchen, -I heard someone has been behaving badly recently. The Sun told me someone was being naughty…-

Pots and pans were knocked down from the counters, making you flinch and cover your own mouth in fear of letting a sound slip out, and with the corner of your eye, you saw Jake begin crying. 

-Isn’t that right, Jake?- the psycho laughed, beginning to move once more, -Did the Sun lie, or are you actually misbehaving?-

You grabbed one of your coworker’s hands and began to crawl away, forcing him to come along, attempting to get on the other side before you could be seen. 

-Come out, come out, Jake, we just wanna play a game with you.- The man faked disappointment, opening any cabinet big enough to contain a human and making a mess of the kitchen around him as an attempt to drive you out of hiding. A metal lid rolled all the way in front of you, stopping right in your tracks, but being too focused on trying to understand how far the intruder was, you didn’t see it, and you hit it with one of your hands, sending it against the wall with a clang.

-Shit!- you said, standing back up, -Run!-

-There you are!- screamed the intruder, immediately running after you and Jake as you scrambled up on your feet and did everything you could to get away. 

You went back into the dining area, attempting an escape through the broken back door, but just as you turned the corner you found the sun-masked man standing in your way with a metal bat in his hands. While trying to step away from him and avoid his first swing directly aimed at your head, you tripped onto Jake, falling on him and causing both of you to ruin on the ground, hitting your head against the wall in the process. Breathing heavily, you managed to back yourself into a corner, unable to see through the heavy cloud of pain blossoming in your skull as warm liquid dripped down your neck, soaking your work uniform and making you dizzy. Your every breath was painful, your throat and mouth burned dry and your heart was beating out of your chest, deafening you entirely to the screams of your coworker being slammed against the wall beside you by the man with the hatchet. You were barely conscious, enough to distinguish the sun mask kneeling in front of you to observe you better as a crunch echoed through the diner, final in the way it made Jake’s protests and cries come to an abrupt stop.

Blood began to pool on the floor next to you, dripping down the wall where the killer’s hatchet had split open his skull, and the metallic scent hit your senses like a punch in the guts. You suddenly awakened, gasping for air like a starving man, and immediately you flinched when the sun mask leaned closer to your face. You couldn’t suppress the tears pushing out of your ducts, streaming down your face in rivers, and you hiccupped when, during your struggle to push yourself back up, you slipped on the blood with your palms and found yourself face-first in it. 

The murderer with the hatchet, who was wearing a moon-themed mask and a costume matching the other maniac, let go of Jake’s body and let it slide down the wall into a sitting position right beside you, making you scream and stumble back into your corner. 

-Please don’t kill me!- you begged, out of your mind with fear, -P-Please, please, I beg you, please d-don’t kill me, I didn’t do anything w-wrong, I didn’t…-

-Oh, we know, sweetie,- cooed the sun mask, his amused voice so sickly sweet it made you want to gag, -We believe you!- 

You couldn’t understand what was happening anymore. Were you in danger? Were they going to kill you as well? Why did they kill Jake in the first place? You were going mad and couldn’t even bring yourself to think, all you wanted to do was go home and huddle yourself into a warm nest of blankets. You wanted to wake up and find that the horrifying reality you were living in was actually nothing more than a horror film-induced nightmare. 

-We believe you, really,- the sun’s voice came down to a docile whisper as one of his gloved hands brushed against your cheek, making you whine and attempt to curl away from his touch. The gloved fingers were cold—so cold. You wanted to puke. -But I’m afraid we can’t let you go away so easily after seeing what happened here.-

His thumb brushed over your parted lips, spreading a drop of blood like it was a gloss, tinting your lips of a deep crimson color, until his finger pressed on the other side of your jaw. You looked up at the man, wide-eyed, as his other huge hand also wrapped around your throat and slowly began to crush your windpipe with his strength. 

-Too bad,- commented the moon-masked man as he began to lean closer. His entire “face”, chest and arms were covered by blood and brain matter, dark and gooey, drenching his white and black top with it, -Would have loved to play a little game with you, just to pass the time, you know? Unfortunately, we still have morals.-

-Yeah,- laughed the sun, -We don’t go for innocent people usually—not unless they give us a reason to dispose of them, of course. Nothing personal, ‘kay? No hard feelings between us?-

You were choking, flailing your hands around while trying to pry his fingers off and scratching yourself in the process, and as your face began to turn red and your vision began to get spotty, your eyes ran from a masked man to the other, hoping at least one of them would have mercy on you.

-Unless,- whispered the moon to his companion, admiring the beautiful way your unconscious body lost all its strength and fell unresponsive on the ground—still far from death, as shown by the slow rise of your chest, -Unless we let this one leave to tell the tale.-

-There’s no tale, Moon,- replied Sun, sending his friend a glare while also parting his hands from your throat. In a few seconds you were probably going to regain consciousness, so he stood up and aimed his bat at your head, -We already talked about this, leaving witnesses is out of the picture. Also, do you mind doing this for me? I already got blood on my gloves, and you know how much I hate finishing them off.-

-But think better about it!- spoke Moon, leaning against the wall, knowing that Sun was not going to give you the final blow himself, -Everyone is town is already aware there’s a pair of fuckers going around killing people, but don’t you think it would make our job much easier if people really started to fear us?-

Sun let go of the bat just to stare at his companion, speechless, like he couldn’t believe the words the other man had said. 

-No, I actually think that would make our job much more difficult,- he said, and Moon scoffed, -People will begin to think we are merciful, which could not be more far from the truth.- 

-I think it would actually show everyone in this city how things work.- Moon put down his hatchet and crossed his arms over his chest, showing Sun that he was actually completely serious. -Innocents will be allowed mercy, while rulebreakers will receive the chop-chop treatment.-

Sun sighed, running one of his gloved hands through his blonde hair in exasperation. 

-First of all, don’t call murdering people “the chop-chop treatment”, that’s weird. Second, you already killed innocents before, so what’s so different now? Third, do you actually believe people will understand?- It was clear, he still didn’t trust Moon’s plan, but Sun never listened to any plan that wasn’t his own, so that didn’t count. 

-They will, if you allow them to live and warn them,- Moon nodded towards your limp body, -Also, the other times it was an accident, okay? Not everything can always go according to plan!-

You were beginning to regain consciousness, groaning on the floor and gasping for air.

-Shit, they’re awake!- Sun said, -Kill them!-

-No, we’re leaving them behind,- insisted Moon, grabbing his friend’s wrist and pulling him away from you, -Trust me just this once, it’ll work out in our favor.- 

Sun was hesitating, looking at you, slowly waking up, then at his companion. He couldn’t figure out the best course of action, so he just groaned and let himself be dragged away. 

-Alright, just this once!- he allowed, -Consider this a treat, Moon, because it won’t happen ever again!-

The duo left through the broken back door, walking into the dark parking lot and looking around for any car or passerby in sight, while you blinked your eyes open on the bloodied floor of the diner where you were mindlessly taking orders and serving customers just a few hours prior. Your whole body was in pain, your arms felt heavy and sore, while your throat felt like it had been rubbed with sandpaper both on the inside and on the outside. You finally managed to completely open your eyes and stare at the ceiling, still not believing that you were still alive. What had convinced the two killers to spare you? Which one had mellowed the other into showing mercy? You couldn’t say, there were too many things you couldn’t explain to yourself, but as you turned your head around to look at Jake’s lifeless body next to you, your eyes came to an halt on his chest, where the moon—his killer—had left a plastic bag containing a bunch of colorful pills. For a second you felt dazed, until you understood that the two clowns were leaving a clear message. They didn’t like the idea of people selling drugs to highschoolers, and that was probably the same reason why you were left alive, unscathed except for the blossoming bruises the sun’s hands had left on your neck, red and angry against your skin. They had spared you because you hadn’t hurt anyone;  that explained the words the moon guy had told Jake in the kitchen and why you were still allowed to breathe, but it didn’t excuse the viciousness behind the duo’s actions.

The blood around you was expanding, soaking your hair and work shirt as well, and for some reason your first thought was that it felt incredibly warm, like there was some possibility that Jake was still breathing beside you, like his heart could still be pumping blood in his veins, like you could turn around and see him alive and well. Of course, that wasn’t the case.

You had been graced with life, and that night, on the unswept and bloody floor of a diner, you decided you were going to do everything in your power to keep things that way, in case the astral duo ever changed their minds and came back for you. They had spared you once, and you weren’t going to give them a reason to take that gift back.

[muwapsturniolo]

✯Chris dating a black girl ✯

-he would be so lost but in love

-he gets whiplash with how much you change your hair (different colored wigs, different braids, etc)

-“wasn’t your hair just blue yesterday?”

-would try and run his finger through your hair and would be scared when his hand gets stuck

-he tries to put on all your bonnets

-“why the fuck do you have so many?” “Mind the business that minds you Christoper”

-LOVES THE GLOSSED LIPS (he loves the brown lipliner combo🤭)

-buys you lipgloss from a store but gets confused when you tell him it’s the wrong one.

-“it’s lipgloss how is it wrong?”

-introducing the beauty supply✨

-he’s amazed by everything in the store and keeps trying to touch everything

-“stop touchin! My momma would have popped you by now!”

-tries to convince you to let him get a durag

-“chris baby, let’s not have you get canceled.”

-gets scared by the mannequins

-he gets stuck reading all the perfume oil names (his favorite is ‘lick me all over’)

-“you lost baby?”

-he gets scared when a auntie speaks to him but he feels warm at the pet name.

-“no?”

-stays by your side for the rest of the trip

-blushes when the aunties hype him up for paying for all your stuff.

-if you’re close with your fam, he loves going over.

-“is your mom making her peach cobbler!?”

-plays fornite with your brothers

-listens to your sister complain about their boyfriends

-if you’re not close with your fam (like me) he will listen to you complain.

-“my auntie need her shit rocked for real! I’m tired of her ass!”

-“that’s why her kids got taken. She can’t keep a man and she can’t keep her kids!” Chris chokes on his drink.

-his first cookout he was mad confused when your mom (or whoever) told him to only bring the paper plates.

-“I was going to bring cookies!”

-“bring the paper plates, ion have time to back up your cookies Chris.”

-almost cries when he doesn’t see Pepsi in the cooler and sees RC.

-looks at you aunt/grandma crazy when they demand you to make his plate first.

-“look at him! He don’t have no meat on his bones! You be starving him y/n!?” “Ion even live with him!” “A damn shame, come on baby let’s get you a plate!”

-he fucks up the food! He had three plates

-“he fuckin that shit UP!” Your cousins try to clown him.

-nervously laughs and nods along to your uncles talking about getting girls and dominos (old head shit)

-your cousin offer him to take a walk with them and he says yes but then you gotta snatch him up and tell him what that means.

-he definitely embarrasses you trying to dance.

-“I told you to only get up to the cha cha slide!”

-“I wanted to dance!”

- takes home four plates

Lemme know if yall want more of these!!!

TAG LIST 🍑

@bernardsgf @bernardsleftbootycheek @blahbel668 @mattfrfr @gdsvhtwa @sturniolo-aali @lily-loves-struniolos @kynda-avery @causeidontlikeagoldrush

@st7rnioioss @carolinalikesthings @mattslolita @suyqa @xxloveralways14 @pepsiimaxx @judespoision

@ivonchetooo1239 @that-general-simp @iloveurgf

[heartfullofleeches]

Clown Reader's biggest fans-

Interviews have never been easy- When you're on set the camera just disappear, but surrounded by all these blistering lights you feel singled out. It's different from being the center of attention and more like you're in the middle of an interrogation.

The interviewer checks through their notes. "Now, Y/n - While doing some research into your show, our team happened to notice there are three reserved seats in the crowd at all given times, but nobody ever sits in them. Who are they for?"

Your relief is palpable. At least they were starting off with simple questions. "Oh! They're for Bebe, Grinny, and Charlie."

The interviewer scans through the papers, brows raised. "Grinny?"

"They're my friends. My starting crew if that makes things easier, but they mean so much more than that. When I was began my career as a entertainer they were the ones I brought with me to help with the kids. They're a bit worn out now and a little scary to the little tikes so the producers wouldn't let them join me on the show, but it's not like I'd just leave them behind."

"Uh-huh.... Go on?"

"Bebe is the jokester of the group. She's this clown doll I got as a yard sale with stretchy arms and legs. She gives the best hugs and always knows how to make me laugh when I'm down. I still get my best material from her. Grinny is a bit of crybaby. He's a puppet with the biggest smile, but don't let that fool you. He taught me and the kids it's okay to not to not always feel happy. Charlie.... Charlie is my guardian angel. They've always watched over me and been my voice of reason. They're a mannequin I glued wings and a bunch of eyes on when I was bored. I don't know where I'd be without any of them. We've been through thick and thin, and thinner together. It"s save to say they're my biggest fans...."

You slap your hands over your mouth. "Ah! Please don't release that part. I'd hate for the kids to get jealous, haha!"

"We'll cut it out in editing. Thank you, Y/n. We'll take five to let you get some air."

"Alright." Excusing yourself from the table, you walk over to the opposite side of the stage - stepping behind the curtains leading to the dressing rooms. The door to your room is slightly ajars - large button eyes peaking from the crack.

"Bebe!" Rushing over, the large doll falls into your arms as you swig the door open. Her arms rest over your shoulders as you support her weight - sewn lips pressed to your cheek. Laughter erupts from your chest as you attempt to push her back into the room only for her to fall right back into your arms.

"I missed you too, but at least let me get through the door first. Were you eavesdropping again?" The doll doesn't answer as you scoop your arms beneath her legs and carry her inside. The camera crew had been known to move your dolls around to mess with you before so her off placement doesn't surprise you. You carry her over to the couch where Grinny laid on the pillow you always used for your naps. He never faired well without you so it was the best thing for him. Charlie was always off on their own. Bebe does get on their nerves, but you know it's because they miss you too and want to be alone with their feelings. You wheel the mannequin from beside your dresser and over to the couch as you then crawl upon in between the doll and the puppet.

"Thanks for always being here for me, guys. I owe it all to you. Please wake me up in five minutes, Charlie."

You close your eyes as you rest your head on the cushion of Bebe's soft body - a plush hand stroking through your hair as you drift off to sleep.

[hometoursandotherstuff]

I posted Amber's carousel coffee table a few weeks ago, and here's the rest of the room. Wow. Just, Wow.

Amber says, "My lady Lulu mannequin may make some folks feel uneasy, but I've always thought she's a hoot. I apologize to anyone who finds rubber faced dolls, clowns, and mannequins creepy." Where does one get stuff like this?

With and without the chandelier on.

via FB group Moody Maximalism (for every decor type)

[daphnethebanjolover]

Thoughts on IF

Also known as "Ryan Reynolds Looking Hella Fine for 1 hour 44 minutes Straight"

You gotta watch this movie. Don't ask why. Just do it.

I've always wanted to know what Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends would look like in a live-action setting, and if John Krasinski has to be the one to bring that to life, then so be it.

I will admit, I was confused at the beginning as to why Bea was at the hospital when the mom was already dead.

Before I say anything else, the soundtrack. This is why music is in movies. The music always seemed to fit both the specific scene and the whimsical mood of the film as a whole.

Also, the CGI. All of the IFs fit seamlessly into the live-action scenery without being excessively photorealistic. I mean, there's one scene where Bea walks past Blue, and he casts a shadow on her. How do they do that?

Speaking of Blue, 10/10 casting. Steve Carell has the exact type of energy needed for Blue.

John Krasinski had to have heard of Foster's. I mean, come on. There's literally a character named Blue.

Blue: I'm Blue. Me: You're purple. Bea: You're purple. Me: (hits arm on armrest from laughing too hard)

We wear suspenders in this house.

The surprise I felt when I heard Steve Carell's voice coming out of that guy was exactly the same as when I realized Billy Crystal voiced Calcifer in Howl's Moving Castle.

I like that lil' freak who looks like the Faker from Jackbox, but he's gotta stop climbing onto people.

Also, that art mannequin guy looks kinda sexy. Is that just me?

That ghost guy just spent the whole time vibin'.

The Better Be Good to Me dance number has me convinced that this would make waves on Broadway. We just need the budget for Bea to re-imagine the house.

The underwater scene after Cal gets pushed in the pool was sick. This must be why people like that one Nirvana album cover.

I had a feeling that Blossom used to be Grandma's IF just from looking at Grandma's tutu in the picture. I didn't even notice her in the background.

The scene where Bea is by her dad's bed while he's sleeping makes me think this is the type of movie that would make my mom cry.

I know that the "picture was folded the whole time" trope has been done before, but that twist actually got me while also putting together so many pieces at the same time.

Seeing Ryan Reynolds in that dorky-ass clown outfit was simultaneously the most beautiful and the most hilarious moment in the entire movie.

Overall, 9/10. That 48 on Metacritic is wack.

[hiest-4738]

WARNING SPOLIERS FOR SM 6

WARNING SPOLIERS FOR SM 6

WARNING SPOLIERS FOR SM 6

WARNING SPOLIERS FOR SM 6

WARNING SPOLIERS FOR SM 6

WARNING SPOLIERS FOR SM 6

my review of spooky month 6

i thought id like him. turns out i think hes weird

yes

HIS EYES DID THE FUCKING THING AGAIN LETS GOOOOOO

HOLY SHIT I THOUGHT THAT WAS ACTUALLY HIM FOR A MOMENT THEY HANDLED MOLOCH SO FUCKING WELL HERE

he finally gets l e g s and honestly theyre most of the same ones id hope hed have if he DID have em!

rick handled this like a champ

AAAAAAAAAAAAOPIHUTHDGHYHUJ

HE EVEN HAS THE SAME THIN SHORT LEGS AS THE CLOWN DOES

MY ROBLOX FRIEND WAS RIGHT ABOUT THIS AND I DIDNT FUCKING BELIEVE THEM HOLY SH I T

I HAD A THEORY THAT THIS WAS GONNA FUCKING FORSHADOW SOMETHING

AND LOOK WHERE THE FUCK WE ARE

hearing them cry makes me so fucking sad. they think this guy they just met just MURDERED their friend

im unsure about him being in the cult now i thought he was but then the cult fucking attacked him

EYES IS BACK EYES IS FUCKING BACK EYES LITERALLY EYES IM LOSING MY SHIT OVER HERE AND THEN EYES SHOWS UP I FEEL LIKE SCREAMING BUT ID WORRY MY SISTER SO IMMA DO IT IN TEXT AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ever since i saw that drawing of a giant spider with the mannequin i thought the spider would be related to eyes due to the bug-limbs on eyes' head matching the position and number of the legs on the spider AND LOOK AT THIS

SPOLIERS FOR THE ALT ENDING

THESE 3 ARE IN THE CULT. I SUSPECTED THAT WITH THE THEIVES BUT THEN THERES THE DEALER, HOLY SHIT

[mag200]

good day to think about sebastian skinner. guy gets called for a plumbing job out in the middle of the forest where no people live. pays double, nice. theres a factory full of mannequins there. he checks out a drain thats clogged with “dark red water” (definitely not blood and hair and fat and bits of people) while a clown tells him how much she wants to pull the skin off his body, and as hes listening to this he’s just like, huh, not my business. and he just gives her the invoice and drives away. they call him back the next day to fix another drain and hes like yeah sure i’ll come right over. he gets there and the clown leads him into the mannequin factory where they’re all cutting up human heads (which are still alive and in pain, btw) and they all turn to attack him. he runs away, aided by jude fucking perry of all people, who burns the shit out of his shoulder but lets him drive away before she burns down the entire forest and all the mannequins. and this guys just like, well, thats saturdays for you innit? legend icon behavior.

[rafecamerons-national-anthem]

A HILARIOUS SPOOKFEST-DREW STARKEY

𝕤𝕦𝕞𝕞𝕒𝕣𝕪 Drew and Y/N visit a haunted house and one of them gets hilariously spooked.

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

It had started as a casual dare. Drew and Y/N were out with friends one crisp October evening, enjoying pumpkin spiced lattes and planning Halloween festivities, when someone brought up the haunted house attraction on the edge of town.

“They say it’s the scariest one around,” Drew’s friend JD said, grinning. “People have walked out halfway through.”

“Pfft, please,” Drew said, leaning back in his chair. “It can’t be that scary.”

Y/N raised an eyebrow. “You’re awfully confident for someone who jumped during that horror movie last week.”

“That was a cheap jump scare!” Drew protested, his cheeks flushing. “This is different.”

“So, you’re saying you’d go through it?” Y/N challenged.

“I’ll go if you go,” Drew shot back, grinning mischievously.

Y/N hesitated for a split second before nodding. “Fine. But don’t say I didn’t warn you if you end up screaming like a little kid.”

“Oh, it’s on,” Drew said, already picturing himself as the brave hero of the night.

The haunted house loomed before them like something out of a Gothic novel. Its weathered facade was covered in fake cobwebs, and ominous howls echoed from within. Fog machines pumped out thick clouds that clung to their ankles, and a creepy actor dressed as a zombie shuffled near the entrance, groaning dramatically.

“Looks cozy,” Drew said, trying to sound nonchalant.

Y/N smirked, pulling her jacket tighter. “You ready, tough guy?”

“Always.”

They handed over their tickets, stepping into the dimly lit hallway. The door creaked shut behind them, sealing them in darkness. The first room was eerily quiet, save for the faint sound of footsteps overhead. Flickering candles lined the walls, casting long shadows. Drew walked confidently in front, determined to prove he wasn’t afraid.

That confidence lasted about thirty seconds.

Out of nowhere, a bloodcurdling scream rang out, and a figure in tattered clothes lunged at them from behind a curtain. Drew let out a startled yelp, instinctively jumping back and into Y/N.

“Drew!” Y/N exclaimed, laughing as she steadied him. “You okay there?”

“I’m fine,” Drew said quickly, straightening his shoulders. “Just wasn’t expecting that.”

“Uh huh,” Y/N said, her grin widening. “This is gonna be fun.”

The next section was a labyrinth of narrow hallways. Lights flashed sporadically, and eerie music played in the background.

“Stick close,” Drew said, holding out his hand.

“Who’s scared now?” Y/N teased, but she took his hand anyway.

As they turned a corner, a mannequin suddenly came to life, its head snapping toward them. Y/N screamed and clutched Drew’s arm, her bravery momentarily forgotten.

“Not so tough now, huh?” Drew said, his voice tinged with amusement.

“Oh, shut up,” Y/N muttered, though she couldn’t help laughing at herself.

The next room was filled with clown mannequins, their painted faces twisted into grotesque grins. “I hate clowns,” Y/N whispered, clutching Drew’s arm tighter.

“They’re just mannequins,” Drew said confidently. “Nothing to-”

Before he could finish, one of the clowns suddenly sprang to life, waving a chainsaw in the air. Drew let out a loud, undignified scream, practically leaping behind Y/N.

“Drew!” Y/N gasped, half laughing, half shrieking.

“I thought it was fake!” Drew said, his voice an octave higher than usual.

“It’s called a haunted house for a reason!”

By the time they reached the final room, both of them were on edge. The air was thick with fog, and ghostly figures floated above their heads.

“Do you think it’s over?” Y/N whispered, peering around nervously.

“Probably,” Drew said, though he didn’t sound convinced.

Suddenly, a trapdoor opened beneath their feet, and a costumed actor reached out, grabbing Drew’s ankle.

“NOPE!” Drew shouted, bolting forward and dragging Y/N with him.

They burst through the exit door, breathing heavily as they stumbled into the cool night air.

Outside, they both doubled over with laughter, the adrenaline still coursing through their veins.

“You screamed so loud,” Y/N teased, wiping tears from her eyes.

“You weren’t exactly quiet in there,” Drew shot back, grinning.

“Yeah, but you hid behind me in the clown room!”

“That was strategic!” Drew protested. “I was letting you take the lead.”

“Sure you were,” Y/N said, smirking.

They grabbed hot chocolates from a nearby stand and found a bench to sit on. As they sipped their drinks, Drew reached over and took Y/N’s hand.

“Okay, maybe I got a little spooked,” he admitted.

“A little?”

“Fine, a lot. But it was worth it,” he said, smiling at her. “You’re the best haunted house partner I could ask for.”

Y/N laughed, leaning her head on his shoulder. “Same here, even if you did scream like a banshee.”

And despite the scares, Drew wouldn’t have traded the night for anything.

𝕥𝕒𝕘𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕥 @nicholaschavezslut69

[catboyfelixer]

The Shop Down The Street | Bang Chan

Pairing: Chan x GN!Reader Summary: You've walked down this street many times before, but somehow you never noticed this vintage store until you're literally forced to look at it. They've got some really cool clothes, a huge vinyl record collection, and a cute guy working at the counter. But when you stumble upon a section of the store you shouldn't be able to see, you realize that there's more to this world (and to yourself) than you once thought. Genre: Fluff, Humor, Supernatural Notes: i dont have notes but i will say chan looks really cute in that pic

It was a gust of wind that brought you here, but it felt more like a push. A force at your back propels you forward, and you come face to face with a peculiar shop you've never seen before. "Castlebrook Vintage" the sign out front reads, and through the glass you see a wooden interior filled with racks of clothes and lined with old books on the shelves. It's strange, you walk past this area once a week; surely you would've noticed a cute vintage store here, right?

There's something in your chest pulling at you to go inside, and when you open the door, the chimes echo an intimate song that welcomes you in.

As soon as you step in, you feel the change in temperature. The cold wind is replaced a cozy warmth that is accentuated by the warm yellow lights. You are immediately greeted by an array of interesting clothes, all arranged near the entrance. An old rock song you don't recognize is playing on the speakers, and it accompanies you while you look through the vintage jeans at the front. You're alone in the store, save for a boy beside the counter hanging jackets on a rack. He's quietly singing along to the song, until the drums kick in and he starts hitting the rack with coat hangers as if they were drumsticks. He's got a cute face, and unexpectedly large biceps that are very visible under the black band t-shirt he's wearing. He notices you looking in his direction and flashes a smile, and you pretend you weren't just looking at his arms.

"Need help finding anything?"

"Uh, no! Just browsing," you say, and continue rifling through clothes in an attempt to look busy.

"Alright, if you need anything let me know," he says, and the singing continues as he gets back to work.

To save yourself the embarrassment of being caught checking out a cute guy, you walk further in the store. Long tables stand in the middle of the room, stacked with boxes of vinyl records that are neatly sorted by genre and alphabetical order. Maybe one day you'll take the time to comb through the huge variety of music, but the oddities at the back of the store are what draws your interest.

There's a glass cabinet full of interesting old dinnerware, and walls covered in paintings of ships out at sea. Shelves are full of old technology, old boomboxes and record players. You even spot an Atari with a row of games beside it, but the price of it makes you recoil. You turn around to see other things, and are startled by the life size clown mannequin in the corner you somehow missed. Strangely enough, right when you see it, you feel that same pull that drew you to the store. Beside the mannequin, there's an open door. You can see a tiny portion of the room inside, but the many colors peak your interest.

You carefully walk past the clown and peer into the room. On one side, dark wooden shelves are lined with small glass bottles filled with vibrantly colored liquids. On the other, jars of herbs sit beside crystals and other rocks. The table in the middle is crowded with candles, crystal balls and other weird props that look straight out of a Halloween movie. Bookshelves cover the back wall, and you even see cauldrons and brooms in the corner.

This store must have a lot of interesting clientele.

You enter the room to get a better look, and are immediately hit with the worst headache of your life. Every second that passes feels like it gets stronger, until you're on the floor clutching your head.

You vaguely hear someone talking, but the pain is so strong you can't make out what's being said. And then an instant later, the headache is gone.

"Are you ok?"

You look up from the floor, and see the employee from earlier.

"I... I think so?"

He extends his arm towards you, and pulls you up off the ground.

"Sorry about that," he says, "I didn't know you were gonna walk in there. If you said something earlier, I would've turned that off."

Before you can ask what he meant, he steps into the room and gestures for you to come in, which you oblige.

"So, is there anything you need? Potions are here, ingredients are there, tomes are at the back. If there's anything specific you're looking for, I can get it for you."

He looks at you as if you understand what he's talking about at all.

"What is this place?"

This time, he looks at you as if you've just said something ridiculous.

"You know... the witch room. If you can see this room, you must be a witch, right?"

"Riiiiiiight. The witch room. For witches. Ok."

He pauses for a second.

"You're not a witch, are you."

"Wouldn't that be crazy if I was?" You laugh at the thought, but he looks completely serious.

"Then how did you see this room..." he says, more to himself than to you.

"I mean... the door was open."

"You must have some latent magic in you."

"Yeah, ok sure."

"I know it sounds hard to believe," he says, "but it's the reason you felt that migraine when you walked in here. It's a protection spell. Like an anti-robbery alarm but for witches."

"Or I just get migraines sometimes."

"That would be an incredible coincidence," he says. He walks towards the glass bottles on the shelves. "If we're gonna do this, I should probably do it right." He clears his throat before continuing.

"My name is Chan, and we are witches." He grabs a glass bottle in the shape of a raindrop, pops the cork, and takes a sip of the bright blue liquid inside.

Nothing happens.

"Wait for it..." he says, while nothing continues to happen. "Why is this taking so long-" His body starts to glow blue, and he floats a few inches off the ground. He waves his hand above his head to signal no wires holding him up.

Well damn... magic is real. Or you haven't figured out the trick yet, but magic is more fun to believe.

He floats closer to you and holds out the bottle.

"Wanna try?"

"Uh... I probably shouldn't drink random liquids from strangers."

"You know my name, so I can't be a stranger," he says, before returning the bottle to its place on the shelf, "but I get it. You're missing out though!"

"You said we're witches, right? Can I do magic too?"

"Yup. But I'm guessing you never got taught the basics." He thinks for a bit, and walks towards the back. You follow him to the bookshelves, and he searches through 2-inch thick tomes covered in dust. Finally, he pulls out a thin soft-cover book called 'Magicality: Ages 1-4'. It's bright yellow and the cover has two cartoon bears wearing witch hats.

"Every witch grew up on the Magicality books," he says, handing it to you. "These two bears are my Spongebob. They even made some VHS tapes with these guys and I watched those episodes religiously."

You flip through it, and there's plenty of pictures of the bears teaching the (presumed) infant reader how to do simple and safe spells like making glitter appear, interspersed with jokes and coloring pages.

"This is really cute. Thanks, Chan."

"Read through that, maybe do a word search or two, and you'll have the basics down in no time," he says, "and then come back and I'll teach you more." He winks at you and smiles. "Stuff like this."

He reaches for your hand and opens it, palm up. He traces his fingers on your palm in a circle, and specs of golden light follow his fingers. He slowly lifts his hand and red flower petals materialize one by one, blowing away in the light breeze created by the motion of his hand.

The only way you can describe it is beautiful. Any seed of doubt in the back of your mind disappears; this is real, beautiful magic.

Carefully, the movement slows and his hand goes back down to yours, ending the display.

"Aw, don't stop there..." you say, pouting. He laughs softly.

"I could keep going, or you could come back another time and I'll teach you how to do it yourself."

"So you can sell me another book?" you ask, sarcasm in your voice.

"No, I promise it's not to sell you another book," he says, and places a hand on his heart.

This is the second time he's said he wants to see you again.

"I was gonna sell you a crystal or something, though," he adds. You roll your eyes at that.

"What days do you work?" you ask. He taps his chin, thinking a bit before answering.

"Tell you what. Why don't you text me when you've read Magicality, and I'll let you know my next work day." He pulls out his phone, and opens the 'add contact' screen. "Or you can text me if you just feel like talking."

The cute guy you somehow managed to talk to is asking for your number. He's looking at you with a sparkle in his eye, and you don't know if it's magic or anticipation. Finally, you take his phone and add your information.

"So that's your name. I've been trying to figure out how to ask without ruining the flow of the conversation."

"Oh, sorry. I can't believe I forgot to tell you my name."

"It's all good!" he says, putting his phone back in his pocket. "Before I ring you up for your book, how about I show you one last trick?"

"Really?"

"Yeah! Normal witches are so used to magic that they don't care when something cool happens. But every time I show you something, you have a look of awe on your face. It's really cute."

You hope the blood rushing to your cheeks isn't visible.

"This is my favorite potion. You're gonna be so shocked at what it does."

He walks back to the glass bottles (which you now know are potions) and picks one up shaped like a star. A deep blue liquid swirls around inside as he lifts it.

Once again, he pops off the cork and takes a sip, only this time he recoils at the taste. He looks back and reads the label, and his eyes widen.

"Oh, shit. This was the wrong-"

He doesn't even finish his sentence before collapsing to the ground, face down. The bottle doesn't shatter as it crashes to the ground, but the contents of it spill around him.

"Um."

You stand there in shock for a minute. You walk closer to gently kick his lifeless body, and sigh in relief when he snores. He's not dead, just asleep.

"I'm just gonna... go."

You take out your wallet, pull out a ten dollar bill, and place it on his head. Hopefully that covers the book.

Not sure what to do next, you walk out of the witch room and through the store to the entrance. There's no other employees working there, so with Chan dead on the floor—sorry, asleep on the floor—it's probably not a good idea to leave the store unlocked. Unfortunately, you don't have a key, so you just flip over the 'OPEN' sign to 'CLOSED' and head back home.

[otherworldlylovey-dovey]

leon with a girly s/o who puts his hair in pigtails and apply make up on his face. afterwards, treats him with some skincare?

oh my god, baby! This is a funny and endearing picture of Leon! Imagining such a serious character in a situation like this gives him a touch of humanity, so here goes your headcanon, doll.

Leon with a girly s/o who does beauty routines for him

At first, Leon might make a sarcastic comment or resist, saying something like:

"Is this really necessary?"

while his partner convinces him that a ponytail or braid would look great.

God, remember when your little brother or little cousin would start asking questions on a long trip? He's literally that in the process of combing his hair.

Wouldn't you rather have a mannequin? I feel like an experiment here.” “So saving the world isn't enough? Now I have to look pretty too, right?” “This is just what I needed after facing zombies… a ponytail.”

At least your fingers running through his scalp will relax him, he is a stressed man, since the incident in Raccoon City he can't sleep, besides it was either accept the job or be killed.

Oh, the most difficult moment will be when he starts applying makeup. He might complain that the eyeliner tickles or that the blush is "too much" for him.

“I hope you don’t get too excited about the eyeliner. I don’t want to look like a clown.”

but his partner would assure him that he is in good hands.++

“If this is permanent, I’m going to need a mirror… and therapy.”

Finally, when applying skin care products, your partner might joke around by saying something like:

“With all those missions in the rain and shine, it’s a miracle your skin survived!”

Leon, half amused and half resigned, would probably make a sarcastic but adorable comment, like

“Is this what it’s come to?”

as she or he applies a face mask or massages his face with some moisturizer.

This part will be funny because of him comments.

“I thought wrinkles came with work. Now I have to worry about moisturizing them, too?” “Is all this necessary? Because in Raccoon City, my skin was the last thing on my mind.” “Whatever you say, but if someone at the agency asks me what I’m wearing, I’m not going to say ‘hyaluronic acid.’”

Despite everything, at the end of the “treatment” he might be surprised to see that his skin feels better, maybe he would even admit that he feels good, although he would keep his attitude reserved. In the end, he would let his beloved have fun, if only because he loves to see how happy his partner is!

“Well, I must admit… it’s not that bad. But if anyone finds out, I’ll be forced to erase it from their memories.” “If this is what it means to be civilized, I think I’ll still prefer survival mode.” “Now, what’s next? Catwalk classes or ‘seductive gaze’ training?”

I imagined this, LMAO

Each comment would probably come with a resigned smile or a look of "please let this end soon," although, deep down, Leon would be enjoying the experience and the fun time together. His sarcasm would add a special touch to the situation!

Later on he might let you keep doing it just out of boredom or because he likes your fingers in him…in more ways than one (haha, sorry :( )

Maybe you are the reason for that perfect hairstyle that has survived hordes of zombies, explosions, bullets, etc. I mean, just look at it, it's been just as perfect for over 20 years!

He loves you so much that he couldn't refuse this, as long as it was in privacy.