#but they do

[zhelin-thames]

A Batfamily Podcast: "BRUCE, EXPLAIN THIS"

Group Chat: "Batfam Investigations"

Masterpost part 2/4

Tim: "So I was digging through old mission logs, and uh... Bruce, explain this."

[File: Screenshot of a security cam feed showing Batman dramatically standing on a rooftop in the rain for exactly three hours, unmoving.]

Dick: "Bro... were you just standing there?"

Stephanie: "Is this a mood or a training exercise?"

Jason: "This man thinks he's in a movie."

Damian: "Fools. He is establishing dominance."

Babs: "No, I checked the comms. He didn't say a word the entire time."

Cass: [side-eye emoji]

Bruce: "Surveillance."

Tim: "Of WHAT? The sky??"

Bruce: "The city."

Jason: "Bro was brooding so hard he turned into a gargoyle."

Stephanie: "Alfred, can you confirm?"

Alfred: "Master Wayne is indeed prone to unnecessarily dramatic behavior. I simply bring him tea and let him be."

Bruce: "I do not engage in unnecessary dramatics."

Babs: "You literally have a shadow cape-flare technique in the Batcomputer."

Dick: "ALSO. I found another one."

[File: Batman standing in front of a perfectly functional Batmobile, staring into the distance for 47 minutes.]

Jason: "You were just standing there AGAIN. Not even pretending to do detective work."

Damian: "A warrior must be still to master his surroundings."

Stephanie: "Or he just forgot where he parked."

Bruce: "I was thinking."

Tim: "Thinking... without moving for 47 minutes?"

Jason: "Peak dad energy. Just waiting for someone to ask what's wrong so he can say 'I'm fine."

Alfred: "I once found Master Wayne standing in the manor study at 3 AM, staring at a single bookshelf. When I inquired, he responded, 'They moved it."

Dick: "Did we?"

Alfred: "No."

Bruce:........

Bruce has left the chat.

[geeky-nightphilosopher]

I just need A Wayne Family Podcast where all they do is listen and judge.

[swan2swan]

Jurassic World: Camp Cretaceous

Running Gag: Yaz Crashes the Car

It's a scientific fact that if you put Yaz in control of a wheeled vehicle, eventually, you will no longer have a vehicle. It may be deliberate, it may be the fault of the vehicle, she may not even be in the driver's seat, but if any insurance company were to find out, her premiums will be through the roof.

[loneswaggingranger]

idk but I keep thinking about when kinn said, "I've never crossed that line with a bodyguard before. I don't know how I should place myself." and when porsche answered something like, "I also don't know what to do. I've never had that line crossed before." but when kinn asks, "can you please forgive me?" porsche answers, "i did that a long time ago."

and I also keep thinking about when vegas tells pete, "If I die today, could it be you who kills me?" and when vegas gets shot right before he was about to return pete's favour, falling inches away from the teal pool which is pete's thematic colour in equal parts contrast and harmony to vegas' red, while pete's shirt is covered in red as he sobs by his side

Idk man i just keep thinking about this whole fucking show and it permeates into every second of my waking life – like i'd be casually washing my dishes and then suddenly. i remember that this show exists and then it's all haha teehee nth to see here im totally normal j slowly dying inside slowly with kinnporsche scenes semi-permanently lodged in my brain byeeeeeee ✨️✨️✨️✨️

[before-it-felt-like-a-sin]

Being a Shauna lover and a Nat lover at this point in time is hell.

[natjennie]

media about people who aren't there. shows where the most important part of the story has passed. the idea that we persist after we're gone, we impact people we've never met in ways we can't fathom, so much so that we become the main character in a story we aren't around to hear. media that creates characters with intrigue, with connections, with relationships, with goals, with dreams, with life. and then they disappear. they are phantoms, projections, idols without agency in a tale about them. you know what I mean?

[vnknownmc]

I feel like most of Raymonds nicer side of their wardrobe would just be gifts from Lucifer because frankly, i trust that man with fashion more then any of the other brothers. doodle of Lucifer giving her a nightgown because nightgowns rule.

[evertidings]

i ignored the part about rylan coming in through k’s window for so long but.

k lives in a PENTHOUSE.

what the FUCK. vampires are bat-adjacent not spiderman-adjacent??? will they ever reveal their secret technique???

let’s just pretend it works because i said so <3 physics does not exist in this world.

[askblueandviolet]

if you ever took macaque on say, a date, where would you take him lmao

DF: Ask Box is now open again! The absolute maximum amount of asks I can answer is 4 more now (unless one of the asks is a big one like this one or the previous one. Then those asks count as 2. Simply because they take much more effort XDDD). So if I hit that number then I have to close the box again lmao. But hey, it won't be closed forever. The next time it opens it will be when the next chapter of Colours is out!

MASTER POST

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[inanimationinsanitation]

watching the cobs stream is so weird, cause the bots despite their voices obviously have personalities and their own opinions that shine through even when theyre trying to supress them

and as soon as these quirks get on cobs nerves and he tries to get rid of them they start making excuses of why they cant do that, automatically rebeling against him until he forcefully destroys them

and its funny cause cobs said he stopped giving his creations emotions and they developed them anyways. like how bad are you when you start traumatizing "emotionless" robots

[2bluetwo85]

Is it just me, or do Oscar and Andrea (Stella) give off the same energy?

[zhelin-thames]

That Family podcast :DISPATCH DISASTERS

Part 1, Part 2, Part 4

At the Batcave..... Jason, Tim, and Damian are huddled around the Batcomputer, snacking while cycling through GCPD body cam footage and scanner recordings. The mood? Pure entertainment.

GCPD Scanner: "Uh, we have a suspect dressed as a clown... possibly THE Joker... requesting backup."

Jason: pauses video, stares at the screen "Possibly? Yeah, maybe it's just a casual Tuesday clown with a death wish."

Tim: sipping coffee "To be fair, Gotham has an unhealthy number of clowns."

Damian: arms crossed "Only one of them leaves riddles and poetry. How are these officers still employed?"

Next clip: GCPD chasing the Riddler on foot. He turns a corner... and vanishes.

GCPD Scanner: "Uh... we've lost the suspect... he, uh... disappeared into an alley."

Dick (walking in, sees the footage): "You let THE RIDDLER outmaneuver you? The guy in green spandex?"

Jason: rewinds "Look at this. He doesn't even RUN. He just... briskly walks. And they still lose him."

Damian: "I am embarrassed for them."

Tim: deadpan "They should be embarrassed for themselves."

Next video: GCPD officers trying to breach a locked door. The officer fumbles with the battering ram... and accidentally knocks himself out.

The Cave goes silent.

Jason: leans back, wiping a tear "This is the best thing I've ever seen."

Tim: rewinds, slow-motion replay "And watch... BAM. Straight into his own face."

Damian: shaking his head "Weak."

GCPD Scanner: "We have reports of a large bat-like figure... possibly The Batman... in pursuit of

Bruce walks in and immediately turns off the Batcomputer.

Bruce: "That's enough of that."

Jason: "Aww, come on, B, we were just getting to the part where they 'possibly' identify Killer Croc as 'some kind of... uh... lizard guy."

Bruce: pinches the bridge of his nose "Go do something productive."

Tim: opening another file "This is productive. We're analyzing GCPD inefficiencies."

Damian: dead serious "Father, you should fire them all."

Bruce: sighs "I don't run the GCPD."

Jason: grinning "You basically do."

Bruce leaves.

The second he's gone,

Jason: "Alright, next up-'GCPD officers mistake mannequin for frozen Mr. Freeze. Presses play again."

Tim & Damian (simultaneously): "Oh, this is gonna be good."

[golden--doodler]

I just had to draw this adorable Owl House moment with my babies Gene and Alexis. It was just too good of an opportunity to pass up!!

I also somehow completely forgot to put Alexis’ Mickey Mouse on their shirt, which is a true travesty, and I apologize 😔

[ID]: Digital fanart of Gene Belcher and Alexis Franklin-De La Vega (an OC) from Bob’s Burgers. Alexis has quite tan skin, fluffy, light brown hair and light brown eyes. They are wearing a dark purple shirt and light purple pants. They are also wearing pink shoes with white socks. They also have dark purple glasses. They are being carried by Gene, who has short, fluffy black hair and brown eyes, along with light skin. He also has a light yellow shirt and gray pants. He has an amused expression on his face whilst Alexis has a shocked expression on their face. They are saying, surprised, “Oh wow. Sports! :O”. The two of them are standing in the middle of a bright, picturesque forest.

[olteacup]

watch me start my grind bc i have 2 d's and 2 c's since i kept missing school 🥸💔 (i swear its bc the new quarter started and i haven't been on my a-game IM SUPER ((not rly)) SMART AND AWSOME I HAD AMAZING GRADES LAST QUARTER)

[classic-callahan]

actually devastating to see them so in sync