#MMMMMMM IM EATING THIS UP

[vilsoo]

PEEPAW WILLIAM AFTON

[ectofool]

[agayconcept]

.

[hyp3rfixation-h3ll]

hi i'm the resident zac enthusiast / kisser / lover . THIS FUCKS SUPREMELY . PLEASE GO READ IT . THANKS 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 i will now be derailing a train directly into the netherworld

highlighting THIS PART because it's SO GOOD IT'S SO GOOD I'M GONNA SCREAMHGNMFJRJG (EXPLODES INTO CONFETTI AND VISCERA EVERYWHERE

Summary: Several nights before the war, Zac was stationed as a guard to keep watch over a carnival, on the lookout for assassins.

He didn't know what to expect that night.

But betrayal was certainly not it.

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Content Warning: crude language, blood, and stabbing (but no gore)

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New PMATGA oneshot is here!! 🙌

This is an example of how to use the prompt game I made (more details below). This was supposed to be a drabble, but it turned into a whole friggin oneshot instead. Yay?

I hope ya'll enjoy it nonetheless!

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Main character/POV: Zac

Antagonist/2nd Character: an assassin

Setting: Somewhere in the past, several nights before the war

These details were determined after using this prompt game I made to create ideas.

[cosmal]

thinking about james potter in flannel pj bottoms and a tight grey shirt. thinking about james potter's morning voice. thinking about james potter eating nesquick chocolate cereal for breakfast. mmmmmmmm james potter in the morning mmmmmmm

no because im imagining waking up after him and walking up behind him at the breakfast counter and just slumping over him, pushing your face into his neck while he's eating breakfast!!! just the raspy morning, lovely. with his mouth around his spoon. and the feeling of his tight cotton shirt over his chest and back!!! you could fall asleep against him you swear of it. he twists in his seat so you're between his thighs and he leans up to kiss you. murmuring a did you sleep all right? against your lips. and if it's a no, he gets all pouty and drags you back to bed because he can't have his baby all tired :(( just sleeping with him until you've really gotta get up and do things.

[webslingingslasher]

just imagine hockey!peter fucking you in the back of his truck while your boyfriend is calling you and peter says

“forget him who’s dick are you clenching around” holding your throat forcing you to make eye contact with him

mmmmmmm what if i said i have something like this im kinda writing??? it's not hockey!peter but here's a lil blurb from it!!

nsfw under the cut.

---

He eats you like he’s starving, you’ve never had anyone enjoy you like this. There’s never been anyone to make you so vulnerable. You pant, you can’t keep it in, he’s just so good. A moan rips from your throat, it’s like he can sense it and without stopping he throws his hand up to hold it over your mouth. 

“Careful. You don’t want your boyfriend to hear.” You pull at his hand and intertwine it with yours, you hate the reminder. Every day you resent him more and more for keeping you from what you truly desire. 

“Call him what he is, your roommate.” He’s nothing but a blockade to you now. Peter’s lips have a sheen as he smiles at you, he’s coated in your mess. “Does he know that?” You push him down, you’re just as desperate for him. “He doesn’t know anything.” It’s a blanket statement, there’s a lot he doesn’t know. 

How to please you, how you’ve been fucking his roommate for months, how you’ve only been keeping him around to keep Peter.

[lumpiya]

redacted asmr as adventure time quotes !! pt. idk-

—————

angel: so let me get this straight… you’re hitting on me ;)

david: NO.

—————

babe: turns out he’s medically unfit for re-ed. hes got a rare condition called garbage body.

—————

honey: so how long have you had this house?

guy: yes that is true !!! :D

—————

freelancer to kody: hoooo… you’re a sociopath.

—————

gavin: i think acceptance has washed over me…

freelancer: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

—————

lasko: my parents always told me that simple possessions arent the most important things in life.

co worker: word em up !!

lasko: they told me all you really need is a good computer

co worker: amen !!!

—————

lovely: why are you holding your bass up high like that?

vincent: i dont know. i just get better finger action this way?

lovely: but you look like a nerd

—————

ash: thanks for seeing us off guys!

david: yeah of course, its my boat

milo: and we care about him ya dingus!!!

—————

darlin: it means excessive pride of arrogance

lovely: that’s like you darlin !!

—————

vincent: bless this sword fahdur

william: MMMMMMM CHECK PLEASEEEE-

—————

darlin: im tryna get him to bite me later ;)

—————

angel after they caught ants eating their snacks: YA HUNGRY??? ILL EAT YOU. ILL EAT YOUR MOM-

—————

gavin: am i a walking love magnet?

lasko: well you paid the price no doubt. and i wanna have your babies-

—————

sweetheart to the inmates: DO THE SPLITS. NOW DO THE SPLITS YOU MILK LIVER MAGGOT PIEEEEEEE

—————

lovely: you gave me some kind of hostage syndrome !! i. need. THERAPYYYY-

—————

[chrissdollie]

https://youtube.com/shorts/zs4ICOWF80s?si=aE1KAtxchZ19qKK_

THIS IS SO CHRIS MMMMMMM

LMAO YESS he would eat that second clip up im telling u 😭😭

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

👀👀👀 I am staring directly at your tags on traumatized Tim Drake post mmmmm Tim associating touch/comfort with death has me MMMMMMM

okay no because originally i had that idea tangled up in a civilian tim au i had and its only your ask that made me realise that i can just,, use it whenever and oh its so much more mmmmmm with robin tim with like,,

the red robin run with him, pru, owens and z being ambushed by the widower in the desert and then the ras stuff,,,, steph "dying",, seeing his dad in a coma,, him picking the only non-deadly weapon lady shiva had, that time the joker nearly killed him, his first (?) girlfriend, ariana dzerchenkas (did i spell that right?) uncle trying to choke him, his girlfriend darla dying in his arms in a gang war and oh yeah also her coming back as warlocks daughter and that whole mess, everything with captain boomerang,, damian trying to fucking kill him, the cloning of superboy thing with cassie kissing him which many thoughts,,,, then jason, everything with jason from titans tower to battle for the cowl

theres so much and i feel like a rabid fox tearing holes into bin bags over and over and over again, like a radioactive monkey tearing a lab apart to get to all the chemicals, like a lab rat they gave pcp to,,, like the chimpanzee that didnt kill steven yeum in nope but its round two and im fucking eating that shoe this time

...i know what im going to be thinking of as i go to sleep tonight shdjskx

[cowboy-robooty]

Robooty Reviews: Royal Servant (3/10)

Read this way back in middle school... shared mangago lists with one of my friends and recognized this one and decided to reread. Lord. Who Likes This. The story is about Kyon and his master Lucaon and theres like some plot bullshit since in this world theres these guys who are royals and got these powers that they never fuckin use and live longer too and are strong n all that. and the only way to kill one tho is to give them this special poison that is completely undetectable and the only way to cure it is if the person who administered it fixes that shit. But yeah Lucaon hates servants and Kyon is a servant and Lucaon is a classic stoic scum gong and falls in love with Kyon but only starts being nice to him once Kyon literally spends 20 chapters on the brink of death lol bro got a fever and slit his wrists and fell into an ice pond and then got a fever again and pneumonia and Lucaon went "..... ok ill be nice to you now"

the art is good for this story dont get me wrong but its really really really stiff expression wise. maybe i'm just a little stupid and i need to see a huge cartoon tear drop to tell a character is sad but for realsies I do think that the art is pretty, but the expressions when bitches are fucking dying and shit could be a little more extreme. its okay to sacrifice their pretty boy looks for one pannel trust me..

The romance itself is just like whatevs. I will admit I am a fan of how kyon will just take anything like bro does not give a fuck okay cuz hes madly in love with Lucaon and doesnt care what he does to him. Im pretty sure in one chapter Kyon is just walking in the halls and Lucaon lunges at him and bites him until he bleeds and kyon passes the fuck out from the attack and its just like ok lol. LUCAON DOESNT GIVE A FUCK HES SO MEAN TO KYON UNTIL HES SUDDENLY NOT BECAUSE HE HAD HIS SCUM GONG REALIZATION WHEN KYON TRIES TO LEAVE HIM 15 MILLION TIMES AND ALMOST DIES IN EVERY INSTANCE OF TRYING TO LEAVE. the upside to kyon is that hes a simp and a pussy and he is a bit of a little bitch but he isnt a whiny bitch about it. like lucaon is his tormentor and he finds out that THERES A POSSIBILITY that he could be the cause of Lucaon's demise and immediately is like okay ill kill myself i need to get out of here and thats why he almost dies 10 million times trying to leave bc he only tries to leave bc lucaon's blonde ass brother is like dude. you might cause Lucaon to die since you're a secret spy with your memories wiped. AND ITS KINDA FUNNY BECAUSE HE STRAIGHT UP SEES KYON ALMOST DEAD IN BED AND GOES "GOD I WISH THIS BITCH WOULD JUST DIE ALREADY" LOL!!

When i was younger i was a fan of the pink haired guy (lucaons other brother) and his servant who is his boyfriend and treated as an equal and yeah younger me was right tbh kind wish the story focused on them instead. but ngl i hate the entire family drama thing bc like its the plot and all that but im like WHO GIVE A FUCK? this manhwa is just mid. mid as fuck. I'll admit when i was younger i re read the 20 chapters where kyon is on the brink of death like 50000 times over and over again because i loveeee suicide and i lovee when kyon tries to kill himself a million jillion times and Lucaon is like FUCKING STOP. theres like idk tiny hints of goodness. I can enjoy a good scum gong alright and I do like when Lucaon is like "brah... ive seen you cry more times than smile..... thats kinda fucked" MMMMMMM YES. FEEL BAD. FEEL REMORSE. but its just not worf it okay the manhwa sucks and its 100 chapters or some shit like that bruh moment. I also do like how at the end Kyon acknowledges that hes going to die before Lucaon and Lucaon needs to learn how to love other people than him because he doesn't want Lucaon to be stuck on him forever and ever. I think it was a nice bittersweet thing. In short. just not my thing. mid. equivalent to eating spoonfuls of peanut butter for dinner. Like you can... wont be very satisfying tho

[bend-n-twst]

First Kiss, Kyrie and Epel

This one’s LONG and very context heavy. Think post-ch 6. Kyrie is Delia’s younger sister. Kypel have been besties since the start of the year.

Kyrie + Epel:

• after the events of ch 6, they all receive a warm welcome home. Everyone is reunited and tears are had, but most of all Kyrie is just tired and wants to go to sleep.

• she asks Epel to help her walk to her dorm room. Everyone else gives them space.

• it’s a comfortable silence between the two as they take their time to get there, carefully holding and leaning on each other

• they get to Kyrie’s door, and they pause. It was nice being able to hold each other and NOT be in a distressing situation

• Kyrie turns and squeezes Epel tight, burying her head into his neck. He hugs her back and they stay like that for what seems like ages.

• “Hey Epel…. D’you wanna get lunch tomorrow?”

• “We always get lunch together—I mean… yeah.”

• Kyrie hums, barely fighting off the sleep that tugged at her as she stands there comfortably in her best friend’s arms. She’s gonna stay there as long as she wanted to.

• “Kyrie—“

• “Mmmmmm nope—“

• “If you go to sleep—“

• “nuh-uh”

• “lunch’ll come faster.”

• “mmmmmmm hugs nice tho.”

• “…..yeah.”

• Kyrie squeezes him again, and then finally pulls away enough to look Epel in the eyes. She wanted to say a lot of things but her thoughts were congested by exhaustion—she needed to get to bed before she said something she hadn’t thought through like

• “I like you waaaaaaay better than Leon-ass.”

• (said out loud) (she’s not actually bitter she’s just in a sleepy silly mode) (she blinks sleepily)

• Epel’s chest puffs out. She likes him more now!!!

• they say their good nights and Kyrie crashes in bed with her phone in her hand, sending one last text to Epel as sleep takes her [Thnak u for walking mehome that was hell but youre cool and Im glad you came to resche us I can’t waiyt to see u tomorrow ☺️ goodnighy]

• Epel, in the middle of hooting and hollering because she likes him back finally!!!!!!!!!!!!!: [go the fuck to bed, sleepyhead]

• the time comes and Epel, the fucking nerd, carves a few apples for her making a little bouquet.

• Kyrie almost doesn’t want to eat them because they’re so pretty. almost. apples used to be mid for her but ever since befriending epel she’s learned to appreciate them

• lunch is normal for them but there’s a nervousness, an excitement never yet felt between them as they sit closer than usual. Their touches are casual and gentle as if they’d been at this for a while.

• it’s a few more lunches like this before they each gather the confidence to ask for a real date

• separately they enlist the help of their dorms to set up their dates

• With Vil and Rook’s help, Epel sets up an extravagant night for just the two of them. Rook’s all for it because he’s a romantic and Vil is proud that his freshman wants to make a beautiful night for his love (plus they get to decorate Pomefiore to the nines even tho kypel are only going to have dinner and dance. yes Vil teaches him ballroom dancing.)

• Epel simply wants to give her the Royal treatment

• Kyrie goes to Delia, Deuce, and Cecelia for advice. They go the more rustic route by setting up a cute picnic at one of the most romantic parts of the school (with boombox to set the mood)

• Kypel meet at the agreed time

• their respective helpers follow them in the shadows. CeRoo sense each other and catch on to what Kypel have planned

• suddenly the two freshmen run off in a seeming random direction

• the fuckers did this on purpose

• the others are exasperated (rook finds them amusing) as Kyrie and Epel run off laughing, hand in hand

• Delia is set on hunting them down to give them an earful, but kypel effectively avoid her and the others.

• they sneak into Pomefiore and steal some of the food, they run to the other place and yoink the basket and boombox

• after some more avoidance and running around and laughing, they end up in the botanical gardens and settle down with their nice clothes all roughed up.

• they have a lot of fun laughing, snacking, dancing. Yeah their asses are gonna get beat when they get back to their respective dorms but who tf cares when they’ve had the most fun of their lives

• it doesn’t all go to waste either; Epel sort of teaches Kyrie ballroom dancing (very poorly) (they’re kind of flinging each other around) (no one’s watching so it’s fine).

• It just sort of happens, they’re close together and walls are completely down. They kiss for the first time ever.

• Epel has the bright idea to swivel Kyrie into a dip but he loses balance and they both tumble down. Kyrie doesn’t feel the massive bump on her head because she’s laughing so hard

• “Lemme show you how to do it” and she dips him nearly perfectly. they kiss again.

• The end.

• Epilogue: their respective dorm leaders ground them for running off to god knows where.

• epi-epilogue: they get married after NRC and work on the Felmier farm together.

[camelspit]

NEW LOVEJOY EP WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS

holy shit. holy fuck. didnt even know it had come out. you screaming in my inbox is the only reason I ever know when lovejoy songs come out. good work soldier o7 you're better than my spotiy notifs

anyway uhh heres my thoughts while listening to them:

Portrait of a Blank Slate

holy fuck this sounds really cool

words are hard when it comes to music, but I like how like. low? it sounds. compared to the other eps. idk if that makes sense.

i like how he says "once you get to know me" lyric. it sounded very funky !

"If only you knew just how much better things could be" was also really fun

instruments are cool 👍

I like how it picks up at the end! Sort of like The Fall, but more tuned down.

Call Me What You Like

I already listened to this one, but it is so so fun

I adore this one with my entire heart

Def one of my favorite Lovejoy songs, if not my favorite (haven't listened to the others in the ep yet, so maybe that will change)

No exact thoughts on this one, mostly just holy shit

"Im not paranoid, Im a realist" is a very fun lyric

And the way he screams "I know youre gonna kill me" after is also very funky!

Consequences

very cool beginning 👍

ooh the lyrics sound interesting

the way the instruments change? I guess? Is very fun. Like how they sound throughout and shit. Idk man. I havent taken a music class since 5th grade.

I think Ive heard the "Whats this, the consequences of my actions?" part before. It's very fun!

"You're just so painfully punctual" crying

the way it switches between like borderline talking and almost screaming is very cool. i adore when songs do that type of thing, and lovejoy does it so so much.

Warsaw

OUGH. drums..already a sick introI don't know how to explain this? but it has such cool vibes

like my mind is currently going "holy shit holy shit holy shit" but there are no clear thoughts

Oh I like how it picks up at "please just let me go"!

I have a feeling that this is the one that will get stuck in my head

The "it doesn't get any better" talking bit is super fun. It kinda reminds me of the bit in Call Me What You Like

SHE HOPES TO GOD THAT I JUST CHOKE

Scum (It Eats You Alive)

"I feel like Ive reached the end before Ive reached death" OUGH

ooh this ones interesting"You still flinch when his blood pool touches you" mmmmmmm....

"im scum" amen

so so many cool lyrics in this holy shitI

like how almost.. frustrated? This song sounds? If that makes sense

No words in my mind just head banging

Cool sounds near the end 👍

It's Golden Hour Somewhere

woag

OUGH

this one sounds so.. interesting? It's a bit slower than the others, but not in a bad way

OO it sped up it sounds so funky

"they sell you the rope by which you hang yourself" 👀

"to ram the holy scriptures down throats in tennis shoes" 👀

The lyrics have really similar vibes to The Fall. its very fun.

holy shit this song is so fun

Alright, I have only listened to these songs once, besides Call Me What You Like, so this could change, but I think this is my favorite to least favorite rn

Warsaw

Call Me What You Like

Scum (It Eats You Alive)

Golden Hour

Portrait of a Blank Slate

Consequences

Ranking them is hard because they are all very much bops. Will be jamming out to them for the rest of the month. holy shit.

[tonycamonte]

good morning gamers i got my flu shot + covid booster yesterday deadly combo i feel like shit but its okay idgaf. trying so hard to only watch movies on my watchlist but every day im made aware of nine thousand other movies that i could watch right now..... very hard for me. also i realized that while the eating cookies for lunch was probably still a bad idea i think im just nauseous for like medicine reasons. last night i had a dream i fell off a building and split my knee open and nobody gave a fuck kind of depressing but when i went to the hospital the waiting room was just a bar + frank sinatra was the bartender so that was kind of awesome idk. i have to decide if i wanna go to the states tomorrow or stay home and play dnd kind of a horrible nightmarish decision to make because i want to go the states because i love car but also i want to see my friends. and idk if i want to wake up at 6 + get home at 2 in the morning seems kind of awful + i wouldnt get to eat my bfs moms cooking BUT also road trip is so fun. + i get to mmmmmmm i dont know. big deal

[candiedapplez]

"Mmmmmmm yas, tastes so good-" YO get the FUCK outa my way! are you SERIOUSLY eating banana chips, and fuckin drinkin ketchup?! get the FUCK outta here dude! uh.. *rustle rustle* whatcha need do: pick yo lazy ass up, go to the store, and get H O T C H E E T O E S!! and the- aysuyua then buy like SIX of these!! and, just, DRINK THE FUCK OUTA IT! I-Ive drank like FIVE of these and-uhg, this is my last one, cuz its like six, and i eat these too! WATCH! ill eat this muthafucka everyday itssogood. Mm,,,,,mm!! DAMN that shit good! soh yoeu neehd tuh goe to the FUHCKING SHORE!!! and get them. raaah. this shit tastes gooder than a biscuit! but how the fuck do i open it tho? das the problm! so, what needs to do is get a knife and go: *BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM*. THEN CUT THAT SHIT OPEN! once you do tha, uhm,,,,,, LETS DO A QUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO, whatcha need todo, hot cheeto, first. banana SHITZ, CUZ THEY TASTE LIKE SHIT! SO!!1 *KRINCKLE KRUNKLE RUSTLE DUSTLE* banana fuckers! *crunch* AUGEH PPTF WEAHG WHA TE FUCK IS THI SHHI TASTE FUCKIN NASTY!!!!!!!!! so yeah, THIS FUCKIN VS. THIS! and this shit won! lets do a comparing cronte- contest! i dont wanna FUCKIN DRINK KETCHUP! so leave in the comments whats better!, B A N A N A C H I P S or hot cheetos!! ketchaup, or this motherfucker right here! so bitch, you better go get your lazy ass to thestore- AND NOT BUY THESE MOTHERFUCKRS! so you motherfucker, gettin YO ASS WHOOPED! *punch punch* egh- *punch* biitch! the fuck outta here! *crunch nom nom nom nom nom nom nom* mm!,,,,,

THE FUCK YALL LOOKIN AT MAN?! the fuuuh?! *more fucking crunches*

you know what, im just gonna leave......... *leaves*

*comes back* DAMN THIS SHIT GOOD!

*leaves again*

*comes back almost immediately*

*crunch crunch*

THE FUCK?! WHAT YALL LOOKGHIN AT?!

This video is integral to me

[greetingsfromuranus]

umm here for ask game. top 10 vegetables

Ok uhhhhh

1: broccoli is fantastic you can cook it all sortsa ways I like roasting it with a sweet chili glaze

2: Brussel sprouts when you cook em good, roast em up in some oil with bacon bits, cranberries, and honey, and got DAMN you have a good meal

3: fresh green beans roasted up are always great

4: fruits are actually a subset of vegetable so MANGOS I god damn love a good Mango, it's kinda hard to find good ones nowadays (I also haven't gone outta my way to get them in season much) but the good mangos I had when I was a kid were LIFE CHANGING

5: carrots sliced up and roasted in the oven are GREAT throw on all your basic seasonings with a bit of cinnamon sugar thrown in there, put em in the oven till the inside is completely softest the outside is crisp, that right there's just an easy french fry alternative. Vegetables are good for you and there's probably 20 different ones you can make taste like French fries. Eat ya veggies kids

6: hmmm running out of vegetables here lemme ask google... oh potatoes are vegetables, potatoes are god damn great im sure I dint have ti explain those

7: CUCUMERS, I love some persian cucumbers sliced into thin semicircles, pickled with grated carrot in lime juice, mirin, and sugar, then you toss that on with your chicken and rice, oouuuugghhhhhhh it's fucking good. It's just sushi with chicken instead of fish if you do the rice right. Mmmmmmm with some thai peanut chicken, god it's great

8: it looks like garlic is a vegetable so yeah I can get behind some garlic

9: alot of people don't like tomatoes but I feel like they add some much needed moisture and freshness to a burger/chicken sandwich, as long as they're cut thin and positioned right, they're really important to me in my burgers :3

10: mushrooms are low here because I LOVE the flavor they add to gravy, it's fucking fantastic, but I HATE the texture. It feels like fatty dead flesh in my mouth. Eating mushroom gravy on pork TASTES great but the mushrooms make my brain think I just bit into a big chunk of pork fat. And it Grosses me out. Now if you reeeeally dice em up, that's gonna get you some perfect delicious gravy!

And I guess that does it for my top 10 vegetables :3

[captaiinobvious]

does anyone else feel like chewing is 2 much trouble? not only does it slightly hurt my jaw joints and tire me out but it takes sooooo long i wish i could chew each bite like 2 times an be done. but then nothing would ever b crunchy and that would b a truly evil world. no chips? more like world of pain and suffering forever and ever.

birds have it right tho u should just tear off chunks and swallow them whole. for the record yes i do chew way less than i should already im just in such a goddamn hurry 2 eat, either because the food is just 2 good and i want more in my mouth or cuz theres something else id really rather b doing and eating takes soooooo loooooooong i love oatmeal and pudding and noodles and smoothies and brothy soups. broth is the closest ill ever come 2 just straight up drinking a whole chicken. mmmmmmm