#LOVE IS A RUTHLESS GAME UNLESS YOU PLAY IT GOOD AND RIGHT
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galpalkirk · 1 month ago
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state of grace is an early nickistat song
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teddyreblogslotf · 1 year ago
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do you think taylor swift was thinking about jalph when she wrote state of grace bcs i do
WE FALL IN LOVE TILL IT HURTS OR BLEEDS OR FADES IN TIME
SO YOU WERE NEVER A SAINT AND I LOVED IN SHADES OF WRONG
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campbyler · 1 year ago
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dadadadadadada JUST TWIN FIRE SIGNS......... dadadada AND I NEVERRRRRRRRRRRR SAW YOU COMINGGGG--
SO YOU WERE NEVER A SAINT! AND I LOVED IN SHADES OF WRONG! WE LEARNED TO LIVE WITH THE PAIN! MOSAIC BROKEN HEARTS! BUT THIS LOVE IS BRAVE AND WIIIIIILLLLLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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acourtofquestions · 4 months ago
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Me: jamming to State of Grace, until it goes onto the Acoustic Version (then crying over Rowaelin (again) for no reason)
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francesderwent · 1 year ago
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one of the weirdest things about *waves hands vaguely in the direction of my relationship* this whole experience. is this time around? there really isn’t a Taylor Swift song that captures it for me.
#even the MOST romantic ones? ones that I DO think capture something of the essence of love. none of them are right somehow!#i will still not be elaborating at this time#closest are probably Everything Has Changed (dust off your highest hopes everything HAS changed)#King of My Heart (is this the end of all the endings? my broken bones are mending)#weirdly State of Grace (love is a ruthless game unless you play it good & right! this is the golden age of something good & right & real!)#but there’s no hearing a song everything snapping into place like oh THIS is what it feels like#because none of those songs are about him you know??? the specificity is missing and the specificity is why I love him#Everything Has Changed is wrong because I knew a whole lot more than his name when everything changed!!#King of My Heart is wrong because it’s not QUIET enough. it’s too triumphant not awed enough#State of Grace is wrong because ‘you were never a saint we learn to live with the pain mosaic broken hearts’ just isn’t the vibe!#and neither of us have blue eyes!!!#and if this was a fictional blorbo song none of that would even matter because I can reach across miles to make a blorbo song work#but apparently not this time??#and the answer might be ‘well cate Taylor has never written a song about falling in love with an old friend’#(except for Glitch which lowkey sucks and Mary’s Song and INTHAF which go back TOO far; we didn’t grow up together)#but also…..it might be that this time it’s not primarily in my head and so I can’t twist it to fit a song#they say you know when you’re really in love because all the love songs make sense#but maybe that’s sort of the being in love with love stage??#maybe you know you’re really in love when none of the love songs can fully cross over into the uniqueness of your experience#anyway. ignore me#or send me song recs for friends-to-lovers lol#in which cate tells stories
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septembersghost · 2 years ago
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buzzfeed quiz dragging me this morning
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fridayiminlcve · 8 months ago
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SO U WERE NEVER THE SAINT AND I LOVED IN SHADES OF WRONG WE LEARN TO LIVE WITH THE PAIN MOSAIC BROKEN HEARTS BUT THIS LOVE IS BRAVER AND WILDDDDDDD
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midsummerknife · 2 years ago
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all this effort to make it look effortless
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ghostlyaces · 5 months ago
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Love is a ruthless game, Unless you play it good and right
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thenighttrain · 22 days ago
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happy 12 years of i'm walking fast through the traffic lights busy streets and busy lives and all we know is touch and go we are alone with our changing minds we fall in love till it hurts or bleeds or fades in time and i never saw you coming and i'll never be the same you come around and the armour falls pierce the room like a cannonball now all we know is don't let go we are alone just you and me up in your room and our slates are clean just twin fire signs four blue eyes so you were never a saint and i loved in shades of wrong we learn to live with the pain mosaic broken hearts but this love is brave and wild and i never saw you coming and i'll never be the same this is a state of grace this is the worthwhile fight love is a ruthless game unless you play it good and right these are the hands of fate you're my achilles heel this is the golden age of something good and right and real and i never saw you coming and i'll never be the same ohhhhh and i never saw you coming and i'll never be the same (so you were never a saint! and i loved in shades of wrong!) (we learn to live with the pain! mosaic broken hearts!) (but this love is brave and wiiiiiild) this is a state of grace this is the worthwhile fight love is a ruthless game unless you play it good and........ right.
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allthingsimagines · 11 months ago
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State of Grace
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“This is a state of grace. This is the worthwhile fight. Love is a ruthless game, unless you play it good and right” - State Of Grace by Taylor Swift
Rick Grimes x Pregnant!Reader
Summary: The group is wary of Aaron, until he reveals information that shocks the group to their core.
Takes place in season five at the start of the Alexandria arc!
Word Count: 5k+
Warnings: Swearing, childbirth, fluff, and ooc Rick
a/n: This has been sitting in my drafts for literal years. It’s not great, but I don’t care!! I hope you enjoy! Also, sorry for the formatting I’m on my phone!
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The group all stood on high alert as they stared Aaron down as he sat tied to the pole. He was an outsider and knew far too much about them for any of them to be comfortable.
Rick was at the edge. He would either fall off and lose himself or pull himself back. The group was doing their best to keep him stable, but after Terminus, the death of Beth, and his own wife being lost after the Prison he was close to being too far gone. The only reason he hadn’t yet was for Carl and Judith. If he hadn’t had them he would’ve been long gone by now.
Aaron was another threat to the group’s safety.
Rick stalked around him as the group watched on. He seemed like a predator about to go in for the kill. Rick had always been an intimidating guy, but after the loss of his wife and the months on the road he wasn’t sure he’d ever fully return to who he had been when she was alive.
When the Prison fell everyone got scattered. Rick had been in the yard, Carl with Daryl, Judith with the kids, and Y/N had been in the sick wing helping Maggie evacuate people. When everyone got separated she’d just disappeared. No one had seen her since that day and there was no indication she was alive. Rick had lost hope a long time ago. She was tough, but it was difficult enough for them to survive as a big group. There was no way she would have made it months on her own.
Aaron gulped as the group discussed what to do, “My job is to convince you to follow me back home.”
Everyone looked around skeptically at his words. Aaron sighed, he knew it would take a lot of convincing, “I know, if I were you, I wouldn’t go either until I knew exactly what I was getting into.”
Aaron looked around at the big group and took a breath to steady himself. He’d been following them for two weeks and still didn’t know half as much as he would’ve liked to about them. He knew Rick was the leader and had two kids. He knew a few others like Maggie, Sasha, and Glenn, but the rest of them were strangers for now. Yet, he knew they’d keep them alive.
Alexandria needed people who knew how to survive and navigate the world they lived in now. The only people in the community who knew how to was himself, Eric, Deanna, Enid, and Y/N. She was the perfect person to teach them, but she wasn’t much help outside the walls since she was pregnant.
“Sasha, can you hand Rick my pack? Front pocket, there's an envelope,” Aaron asked and Sasha complied as she brought it to him.
“There's no way I could convince you to come with me just by talking about our community. That's why I brought those. I apologize in advance for the picture quality,” Aaron said as Rick pulled them out and looked through them.
“No one gives a shit,” Daryl grumbled out and Aaron nodded quickly.
A few others crowded around Rick to look at the pictures when the baby began crying. The teenager tried his best to calm her, but she just wailed. Rick pinched his brow and sighed, “Carl, will you get Judith the binky in my pack.”
The boy quickly complied as he tried to soothe his sister. Aaron’s eyes widened and he felt his heart jump at his words. He quickly leaned forward, pulling against his binds, “Your son is Carl and your daughter is Judith?”
The group all shared confused looks as Aaron looked like he’d had a world ending revelation. Rick passed the pictures to Glenn as he moved closer to Aaron, “What’s it matter to you?”
He kneeled down in front of Aaron and glared down at him, “Why do you need to know?”
Aaron swallowed, trying to compose himself, before looking up at Rick, “Did you have a wife named Y/N?”
Rick physically recoiled at the question and everyone tensed. How would he know her? Carl stepped closer to them, Judith held firmly at his hip as she was quiet now, “How do you know my mom?”
Aaron looked sympathetically at Carl and Judith before looking back to Rick. He looked as if Aaron had flipped his whole world, “How do you know that name?”
“She’s alive. She’s been living in our community with my husband and I for the past few months. She’s talked about your family endlessly- I just didn’t put it together,” Aaron breathed out and he saw the whole group react to his words.
Rick stumbled back and stood deathly still as he paled. Carl moved forward, his eyes full of hope, “How can we trust you? Where’s my mom!”
Aaron nodded towards his bag, “There’s a picture of her in the inside zipper of my bag.”
Glenn quickly unzipped the pocket before pulling out the picture and passing it to Rick. Rick couldn’t believe his eyes as he stared at it. It was her. She was leaning her head on a man’s shoulder, who he assumed was Aaron’s husband, with a bright smile on her face.
She was alive and happy.
Rick let out a choked sob as Carl tore the picture from his hands and broke down as well as he clutched his sister to him. The whole group was visibly affected by his words as they all had bright looks on their faces. Rick pulled Carl into his side and pressed a kiss to his head, “She’s alive. We’re gonna have your mom back.”
Glenn cut Aaron free and he stood up and rubbed his wrists. Rick released Carl, but when he turned to Aaron to say something he noticed the odd look on his face. Rick moved closer to Aaron and felt his stomach drop, “What’s wrong?”
Aaron looked up at Rick and scratched his neck, “I don’t know how to say it.”
Rick pushed down his fear as he stepped closer to him, “Aaron what’s wrong with my wife?”
Aaron met Rick’s piercing eyes and breathed out, “She’s pregnant.”
Rick swore he’d died. There was no way that she’d lived, but now she was pregnant? She couldn’t be.
Rick grabbed Aaron’s shoulder as leverage as he almost fell over, “What?”
Aaron grabbed Rick’s arm, “My husband and I picked her up on the road five months ago and brought her back. We’ve been taking care of her. The baby is doing great and so is she. She helps our leader, Deanna, out as her advisor so she doesn’t have to leave the walls.”
Rick tried to take in deep breaths, but he could hardly comprehend that his wife was alive and now she was pregnant? Rick grabbed onto Aaron as he fell to his knees. He tried to breathe as everything became too much for him.
His wife was pregnant and she’d been alive this whole time. They were going to have another kid.
Aaron squeezed Rick’s arm and sighed, “Rick, she’s full term now and when I left she was having consistent Braxton Hicks.”
Rick almost fell over from how quickly he shot to his feet. Lori had those during both pregnancies and she’d given birth soon after. He needed to be there for her. Especially considering what had happened to Lori.
“What’s that mean?” Carl asked, quickly wiping any remnants of tears from his face.
“They’re false contractions, but they’re meant to prep your body for labor,” Maggie answered, coming up behind Carl and squeezing his shoulders supportively.
“Take me to her. Please,” Rick pleaded with Aaron and he was quick to nod.
“Yeah, okay, I’ll radio my husband to come get us in our RV. We can all fit, but it’ll be tight,” Aaron said, looking around for approval.
Everyone quickly moved to ready their gear and Aaron took that as his sign to radio Eric. He quickly moved towards his radio that had been tossed out of his bag and picked it up, “Eric, we need you to get us at the barn we scouted. They know Y/N. Her husband and kids are with them.”
“Oh my god. Okay, I’ll be there soon. Be safe,” Eric quickly responded.
Rick held Judith tightly to him as he moved over to Aaron and clapped his hand on his shoulder. Aaron quickly turned to him only to find his demeanor much more relaxed, more like the man Y/N had described. Rick let out a shaky breath and nodded, “Thank you.”
Aaron nodded and sighed, “She’s family to me too now. I’d do anything for her.”
Rick nodded as his nerves began to eat at him. The group packed up quickly and they all anxiously waited in the barn to leave. Twenty minutes passed before Eric pulled up and they all quickly filed in. He seemed stunned by the road hardened people that passed by him to get into the RV. The RV was big, but they had a large group now and they were all crammed in.
They all sat packed into the RV, each having their own quiet conversations for a while until Aaron’s radio went off. The whole group turned to look at him as he quickly fished it out.
“Hey, Aaron, you there?” A female voice said.
“Hey, Denise. What’s up?” Aaron responded.
“Just wanted to check in and give you an update. When are you heading back?” She asked.
Aaron looked around at the group and scratched the back of his neck, “Uh, actually now. I’m bringing back that group I scouted for Deanna. Tell her that we’ll be back in less than an hour and they’ll need to get check ups asap just in case.”
“I’ll let her know, but the doctors office is kinda busy today,” Denise said sounding hesitant.
“What? Did something happen?” Aaron quickly asked, sharing a nervous look with Eric.
“No! No, nothing bad, but we’re about to have a new baby around here soon. She wanted me to let you guys know,” Denise said, with a cheery tone to her voice.
The whole group froze as Aaron looked at Rick in slight horror. Rick kissed Judith’s head and squeezed Carl’s shoulder as he tried to be strong for them. The last time, Carl had to kill Lori after she needed a C-Section. Rick knew Carl wouldn’t survive losing his other mom the same way.
Aaron’s eyes softened as he noticed their family dynamic. He remembered what Y/N had told him about Carl’s mom and he could tell it was causing trauma to resurface for them.
“How is she? Everything going okay?” Aaron asked, nervous himself for his friend.
The radio was silent for a few moments until it crackled again and a new voice came over the radio, “She can speak for herself. I’m in active labor, not dead.”
The whole group shared a look of shock. It was her. Rick quickly moved to the front of the RV to stand next to Aaron, his blue eyes wide and unsure of what to do.
“And yes, I’m fine. I’m almost fully dilated, so not much to do but have terrible contractions till they come. Baby Grimes would like to make an appearance soon, so I’d appreciate if you hurried back. It’d be nice to have someone who I actually care about to hold my hand. You too Eric. How’d scouting that group go? They convinced yet?” She asked breathlessly as Rick and Aaron shared a look.
Baby Grimes. She hadn’t let go either. Rick had a child and wife waiting for him.
Aaron held the radio out to Rick and he looked at it nervously. What was he even supposed to say? Rick turned as Carl came up behind him and took Judith from his arms so he could hold her. Carl’s eyes were filled with a hope Rick hadn’t seen in years. Rick swallowed his fears and took the radio from Aaron’s hand.
“Darlin?” Rick said, his voice wobbling as he choked out the words.
The radio was silent for a moment before her shaky voice said, “Rick? Is that you?”
Rick fell to his knees at the sound of her voice. It was his wife. She was alive.
“Yeah, baby, it’s me. We’re okay. We’re all on our way,” He breathed out as a hand squeezed his shoulder and he looked behind him to see Daryl behind him.
A loud cry came over the radio and the whole group from the prison visibly reacted with relief of their own as they finally had a family member back.
“Oh my god, I swore I’d never hear your voice again. Is everyone there? Carl? Judith? Please, please, tell me they’re okay,” She sputtered out through sobs.
Carl snatched the radio from his dad’s hands and shakily said, “Mom, mom, it’s me. We’re okay. Judith and I are okay. We miss you.”
“Carl, baby, I-I-,” She started but broke down into tears and the radio went silent for a second.
The whole group went dead silent as the radio cut out, but quickly reacted as she cried out over the radio. Rick rushed to Carl’s side as he stared at the radio in horror.
The radio cut back in and Y/N’s groans could be heard in the background, “She’s okay! Just bad contractions. She’s gonna need to push soon, so hurry if you guys can. I’m sorry I’ve got to go to make sure everything goes okay, but Aaron knows where the delivery room is. Deanna knows and she’ll have Spencer open the gates as soon as you get there and let them through.”
The radio then shut off and Rick looked up at Aaron in abject horror. What if he missed his child’s birth? What if something happened to her? Aaron squeezed his shoulder and shook him a bit to bring him back, “We’ll be back soon. She’s gonna be okay. We have good doctors and medical supplies to make sure of it.”
Rick nodded, seeming like he was off in a different place. Aaron moved back to Eric’s side and helped direct him the quickest way to Alexandria. Rick sat against the door of the RV, his mind running over every worse case scenario.
Nothing ever went right for him.
Right now he could have his wife and a new son or daughter when he arrived to Alexandria. Or he could lose them both, and he was sure that he would never survive that loss again of someone he loved so desperately.
Eric pushed the RV as hard as he possibly could without blowing anything mechanical. A half hour passed before Aaron finally announced that they were there. They all rushed to their feet and looked out the window to find a fenced in town with guard towers at the gates.
The group had been in one place with high fences before, but this place looked untouched from the apocalypse. Aaron turned to the group as Eric slowed as they got closer, “When we get in the gates, you will all have to turn over your weapons. We don’t allow people to have them, unless they’re on patrol or cleared by our leader Deanna or Y/N. You will all be interviewed by Deanna and then get a check up by one of our Doctors.
Rick and Carl, you’ll come with me. The rest of you will wait until I come and get you or you’re showed to a house. This community is pretty sheltered, so please take it easy around them for now. Understood?”
They all shared nervous looks before nodding in agreement. The RV came to a stop and Aaron and Rick shared a look.
They needed to go.
Carl passed Judith off to Carol as Eric quickly turned the car off and opened the doors and Aaron, Rick, and Carl quickly moved out.
The group rushed towards the gate as it slid open for them. Rick and Carl hardly had time to admire the community before Aaron waved his hand at them, “Come on. Medical center is over here.”
They hurriedly followed after Aaron and Eric as they ran towards one of the closest buildings and people stared as they sprinted past. Rick couldn’t have given less of a shit as he just ran after them.
Aaron barreled towards a house and quickly threw the door open. Rick’s eyes widened at the sound of his wife crying out. Rick shoved past Aaron and rushed toward the room. The continuing cries became louder from the door at the end of the hallway.
Rick quickly grabbed the handle and threw the door open and there she was. His wife was laying up against a mountain of pillows with her legs propped up.
Dear god.
Her eyes pooled with tears at the sight of her husband alive and in front of her. She released the sheets from her clutched hands and reached out for Rick, “Rick- oh my god.”
Rick went to rush to her when a woman quickly moved in front of him, “Woah! Okay, I know you want to see her, but you’re gonna put her and the baby at risk if you don’t wash everything off of you.”
Rick hadn’t really considered that it’d been months since he’d showered properly. He looked at his hands and found they were covered with blood and walker remains. He hadn’t even thought about it.
“Denise he can- he can stand up by my head and he won’t touch the baby until he’s clean. Right Rick? I can’t do this without him,” She said squeezing her eyes shut and crying out in pain.
Rick nodded frantically, desperate to touch his wife himself after months apart.
Denise looked hesitant, but let out a frustrated sigh, “At least scrub your arms and hands with soap quickly and put on that surgical gown just in case.”
Rick didn’t say another word as he quickly rushed toward the other room where the woman pointed. He moved to the sink and scrubbed at his hands so hard they felt raw. The sink turned red as his hands were washed clean of all the remnants of the outside world. Carl quickly sprinted in, turned on the sink next to him, and did the same.
Once Rick felt like his hands and forearms were clean of blood and filth, he put the surgical gown on and rushed back into the room.
“You have to push! Come on deep breath and bear down,” Denise said as she stood between her legs.
She breathed heavily as she pushed for ten seconds, before she laid back and let out a groan of pain. Rick moved to her side and quickly took one of her hands in his own and pressed it to his lips. Rick tried to force back his tears and the emotions threatening to overcome him as he finally had his wife right in front of him.
She tiredly smiled up at him, her eyes shiny with unshed tears, “Hey Sheriff.”
Rick chuckled before he quickly captured her lips, “Hey darlin.”
Her smile was interrupted as she squeezed her eyes in pain and clutched onto his hand tightly.
“How’s she doin Doc?” Rick asked worriedly, Lori’s death at the front of his mind.
Denise tried to smile comfortingly and said, “She’s doing great, but you’ve got to keep pushing. Baby’s almost here.”
Rick looked down at his wife and squeezed her hand, “You can do it. I’m right here.”
“Me too,” Carl said as he rushed to her other side.
Her eyes brightened at the sight of her son at her side. She took Carl’s hand and nodded as she sat up, “Yeah, I’ve got you two now. I can do this.”
“Fuck yeah you can mom,” Carl said beaming at her.
Rick laughed at his words and she shook her head with a loving smile directed at him, “I missed you, but watch your language baby.”
Carl smirked and he and his dad shared a look as she got ready. Denise smiled at the family before clearing her throat, “Okay, after this next contraction you need to push again. Make it count you’re almost there.”
She nodded and shared a nervous look with Rick. Rick squeezed her hand and quickly kissed her forehead, “You can do this baby. We’re right here.”
She nodded before letting out a shaky breath and squeezing her eyes shut as Denise indicated for her to push. After the seconds of silence she cried out and fell back, but Rick quickly slid his arm around her waist to catch her, “You’re doing great darlin.”
She nodded against his shoulder as she mentally prepared herself to push again.
“I can see the head. One more good push and it’ll be done,” Denise said.
She nodded and she took another deep breath, “That better be a goddamn promise Denise.”
Denise smiled and shook her head, “If it’s not, I’ll give you my bottle of bourbon.”
She let out a shaky laugh and smiled at her, “You’ve got a deal.”
She looked at both of her boys and felt determination swell in her chest. She felt the contraction come on and she pushed with everything she had.
Rick brushed the hair out of her face as she cried out again. Then the room was filled with a sharp cry.
Rick felt his whole body tense as Denise beamed at them as she lifted the baby up, “It’s a girl. She’s beautiful.”
She immediately began to cry as Denise nodded at Rick, “Wanna cut the umbilical cord dad?”
Rick nodded and shared a look with Carl. Carl nodded and quickly moved his arm around his mom to support her sitting up as tears of joy streaked down his face. Rick took the scissors and cut the umbilical cord where she directed as she quickly cleaned his daughter.
Carl helped his mom get more comfortable on the pillows as they waited for Denise. Carl pressed a kiss to her cheek, “I love you mom.”
She smiled up at her oldest boy, “I love you too baby. I’m so glad you’re here. I couldn’t have done this without you.”
Rick’s eyes were full of tears as he carefully looked over Denise’s shoulder as she checked over his daughter. He hadn’t really felt this way since Carl was born. He felt like he was teetering on an edge as he waited to see his youngest daughter.
Denise turned around and Rick moved to her side. Denise smiled softly as she carefully passed the small bundle to her outstretched arms, “She’s healthy and looks perfect. You did great Y/N.”
She let out a choked sob as she took her daughter into her arms, “Hey sweetheart.”
Rick finally let his tears fall as he looked down at his beautiful daughter. She leaned into Rick’s embrace and gently stroked her baby’s cheek, “You’re so so loved already.”
Carl sniffled as he leaned closer to his mom to get a better look at his youngest sister. She looked up at him and smiled brightly, “This is your big brother, Carl. He’s gonna be the best big brother ever and he’s always gonna be there for you .”
Carl nodded as she lifted her up closer to him so he could see her for a moment. Then she turned and her eyes met Rick’s that were filled with emotion. She moved her daughter now to Rick’s side so he could see his little girl.
“This is your daddy. He looks mean and grumpy, but he’s a softie I promise. He’ll always keep you safe,” She said with a gentle smile as he got to look at his daughter.
Rick brushed his finger over her small cheeks and choked out sob. He pressed a kiss to his wife’s head, “I love you more than anything. Thank you.”
She pulled away from him before she leaned up and kissed him. She pulled away breathlessly and smiled before moving her gaze to her daughter, “You can thank Hope for getting us here. I would have died a long time ago if I hadn’t been fighting for her.”
Rick raised an eyebrow and smiled, “Hope? That’s her name?”
She nodded resolutely and beamed, “Been calling her Hope since I found out I was pregnant. Hope Willow Grimes.”
Rick nodded and smiled down at his daughter, “Hope’s a great name for her.”
She nodded before turning to give her boys a tired look, “As much as I love you both, you reek of blood and sweat. Aaron can take you to one of the empty houses to get cleaned up. Then you can come back and hold her. Okay?”
Rick felt his whole being begging him to stay, but she was right. He pressed a kiss to her head and looked down at his daughter before stepping away, “Kay, but you send someone for us if you need anything.”
She nodded as Rick and Carl moved towards the door, “Got it Sheriff. Will you bring back Judith and the others?”
Rick nodded and smiled, “Promise. Trust me they’ll be begging to come see you as soon as we get there.”
“Well, tell ‘em I’ll give ‘em a pass for not getting a baby gift in time,” She joked as she rocked their daughter gently.
A knock came from the door and they all turned to find Aaron and Eric standing there. They both stepped into the room and Aaron smiled sheepishly, “Sorry, we didn’t wanna intrude, but I overheard you. I’ll take them to the house Deanna is setting them up in. She’s gonna set your group up in three houses. Some of the residents are moving your stuff into a separate house so you guys will be together.”
Y/N smiled and waved them into the room, “You’d never intrude. Come see her.”
Eric moved to her side and smiled down at the baby. Aaron held out his hand for Rick to shake, “Congratulations.”
Rick paused for a moment before pulling Aaron in for a tight hug. Aaron tensed for a moment before clapping Rick on the back. They pulled apart and Rick nodded in thanks, “This is all cause of you. Thank you.”
Aaron smiled at the sight of his husband and friend cooing over the baby, “Come on. I’ll take you guys to get cleaned up.”
The boys hesitantly followed after him and to the house. An hour passed and Y/N fed her daughter as she talked to Eric.
“When you mentioned your husband he wasn’t quite what I pictured,” Eric said as he rocked back in his chair.
She raised an eyebrow at him, “What’s so different?”
Eric rolled his eyes, “Y’know for being in an apocalypse where you don’t have many options you bagged one of the finest men I have ever seen.”
She burst out laughing as she grinned at him, “Oh, I know. Trust me I was fighting off women left and right when we lived at the prison. You better believe if I see Jessie anywhere near him or my kids I’ll throw her out like a farm cat.”
Eric snorted and beamed, “I believe it. I’d love to see you take her down. She’s had it coming for years.”
A soft knock came from the door and Y/N sat up and adjusted her little girl in her arms, “Come in.”
The door slowly opened and her husband came into view and her eyes lit up. Rick came in and walked over to her. Eric smiled at the pair and stood up, “I’m gonna go make sure you guys have everything set up.”
She smiled softly at him as he moved to the doorway, “Thank you.”
Eric nodded and shut the door behind him. Rick had changed into new clothes and cleaned up his beard now. He came and sat at her side on the bed, “You feelin okay darlin?”
She nodded and leaned against his shoulder, “About as good as you can be after pushing a baby out of you.”
Rick chuckled in response and she met his eyes. Rick cupped her face as her eyes lit up teasingly, “Lookin good Sherriff.”
Rick pulled her in and pressed a firm kiss against her lips. After a moment passed they pulled apart and she muttered, “I love you.”
Rick kissed her quickly again and moved back, “I love you too.”
“Wanna hold her?” She asked gently holding her out to Rick.
Rick swallowed nervously and held out his arms and she passed Hope into his arms. Rick let out a shaky laugh as he finally got to hold her. He shared a look of awe with Y/N as he gently rocked her.
She pressed a kiss to Rick’s jaw with a smile, “You’re a natural.”
Rick smiled, his eyes staying on his youngest, “Comes with practice.”
The pair were silent for awhile as they watched their daughter. Y/N let out a shaky breath and leaned her head on Rick’s shoulder, “Who isn’t here?”
The silence was palpable between them as she pressed a kiss to Rick’s shoulder, “I- I just need to know, please.”
Rick nodded, keeping his eyes on their youngest, “Beth. She escaped with Daryl, but she got kidnapped by a group in Atlanta. We almost got her back, but she got killed before we could leave.”
Y/N swallowed back her tears and pressed her head into his shoulder and squeezed his arm, “Y’know no one would ever blame you for that, right? You tried your best and that’s all you can do sometimes.”
Rick nodded silently before pressing a kiss to her head. Y/N reached out to brush her finger over Hope’s soft cheek. Rick leaned back and wrapped an arm around Y/N’s shoulders and held his daughter with the other, “Anything we need to know about here?”
Y/N sighed heavily, “They’re weak. These people never learned how to survive outside the walls, because they never had to. Deanna understands what the world is and usually lets me call the shots when it comes to anything outside the walls.”
“Any pushback?” Rick said as he gently rocked Hope.
Y/N scoffed at his words, “Yeah, just a bit.”
“Anyone I need to kill?” Rick joked dryly, his arm tightening around her.
“Not yet. Deanna’s son, Spencer, is a liability. He doesn’t appreciate that I completely changed their tactics for runs, even if it was getting people killed. Spencer and his friend Nicholas are pretty much all talk, but they’re not shy about opposing anything I say. Oh, and watch out for Jessie,” She said leaning further into Rick’s chest, annoyance filling her while thinking about the town home wrecker.
Rick narrowed his eyes at her change in demeanor. He gently lifted her chin so she would meet his gaze. Despite having just given birth to their child, she still felt a pang of insecurity claw at her heart. Rick held her chin gently in his hand as his intense blue eyes met hers, “I have killed people to protect you. I would kill anyone to keep this family safe. You are the only woman I will ever want. Tell me you know that.”
Y/N smiled somewhat bashfully at his words. Those words would have terrified her in the world before it fell, but now it was a declaration of the highest love. She nodded and pressed her lips to his. It was almost as if no time had ever passed as they fell back into a routine with one another.
She pulled away breathlessly and met Rick’s expectant gaze. She let out a breath, “I know.”
Rick nodded and pressed a kiss to her forehead. Hope cooed and stretched her arms out with a yawn. A knock sounded out and Rick moved the the door, his youngest cradled securely in his arms. He opened the door and then Carl stepped in with Judith on his hip. Y/N burst into tears at the sight of her daughter. Judith reached out her arms as she saw her, “Momma.”
Carl came over and sat next to his mom and Y/N was quick to take her into her arms. She pressed a kiss to Judith’s head, “Oh, babygirl I missed you so much.”
Judith clutched onto her shirt and snuggled into her mom. Y/N rubbed Judith’s back with one hand and reached over and pulled Carl into a tight hug. Carl sighed and leaned into his mom’s embrace. She pressed a kiss to the side of Carl’s head, “Thank you for keeping him alive.”
She and Carl shared a look of understanding as they pulled away. Rick came over, looking like a true dad with Hope in one arm and his other hand tucked in his jean pocket. Y/N wiped her tears and sat Judith on her lap as Rick came and sat next to her. She looked around at her family and smiled, “I don’t believe in god, but thank whoever the hell is in charge up there that brought y’all back to me.”
Rick smiled and kissed the side of her head, “Damn right.”
Then a knock came from the door and Maggie popped her head in. Maggie rushed over to Y/N as the rest of the group followed in. Y/N swore she’d cried all of her tears, but each hug she gave to the members of the group brought on a new onslaught.
After each member of the group had been properly introduced to their daughter Rick stood off in the corner. He looked around the room, Hope settled safely in the crook of his arm. This was the happiest he’d seen the group in years.
Carl had yet to move from Y/N’ side, as Judith happily sat on his lap playing with her mom’s hand. Rick was certain he had never seen Y/N look so beautiful. She was beaming as she talked to Glenn and Maggie, despite the fact that she’d given birth hours earlier.
“She’s just like Lil Ass Kicker.”
Rick chuckled as Daryl came to his side. He looked down at his daughter lovingly and sighed, “This is what we fight for. Everythin we do is for everyone in this room.”
Daryl made a noise in agreement, “We keep going for shit like this.”
Rick met his wife’s eyes and she was quick to shoot him a wink, before she turned and pulled Carl closer to her into a hug. He sighed, his heart feeling full for the first time in months. Herschel had told him years ago that every day was a choice.
He would to choose to keep his family in the room safe everyday for the rest of his life. No matter what it cost.
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astarionancuntnin · 3 months ago
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here's my masterlist with everything i've written! note that:
all fics are explicit and astarion x fem!reader unless specified
series and multichapter fics have their masterlist linked with all chapters and ao3 links
one-shots/requests will have their main theme mentioned in parentheses next to the title, and the full lists of content warnings are available on their linked post/ao3 page
Requests: CLOSED
Current pending requests: 3
- i am more comfortable writing astarion (spawn or ascended) and halsin, but im open to get out of my comfort zone and write other characters! - i write in third or second POV (more experienced with x reader/tav) - comfortable with most types of writing (fluff, smut, angst, hurt/comfort) - i am willing to go extremely dark and kinky (basically ask and if its above my limit ill tell you, but if ive already written about it, im cool with it) - send an ask and ill get started on it! (i am quite busy recently, but i promise to get around to your request sooner rather than later)
fics are posted in chronological order of creation
this list will keep getting updated as i upload more
full list below the cut!
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she was a wildfire that couldn't be tamed; he was the night star admiring her ruthless dance
Undisclosed Desires (Denial of feelings, rivals to lovers) (part 1)
Masterlist
astarion and you, along with your other companions, have been traveling together for a few weeks now. he gets on your nerves at least once a day. but as much as you hate to admit it, your late night activites are plagued by him. little do you know, hes aware of the effect he has on you and intends to use that to his advantage.
Bad Blood (Mature, Angst, follow up fic to Undisclosed Desires, Astarion POV) (part 2)
Masterlist (not posted yet)
it was meant to be a nice, simple plan. get the sorceress to fall in love with him to assure his safety. what he didn't plan was to fall for her as well, and all the complications that came along with it.
A Lesson in Taming Your Dark Consort
(all fics in this series are one-shots that surround the dynamic between Ascended Astarion and his consort Malva (my oc evil tav), heavily BDSM driven)
Taming a Tempest (spanking, semi-public sex)
oh, to be the Vampire Ascendant's dark consort. to have eternity and enhanced powers right at her finger tips - only to be denied. but two could play this game, and Malva would make Astarion regret witholding anything from her.
read on ao3
read on tumblr
Dancing on the Edge of a Knife (knife play, orgasm denial)
ever since his ascension, Malva was convinced that Astarion was the only person who could understand her every twisted desire. well, almost. there are some things she still keeps to herself, he simply wouldn't understand this part of her, the one who dances on the very edge of her knife.
read on ao3
Contributions to Angels of The Night Collection
read on tumblr
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Blood Sisters (MalvaxMerelind)
Die For You (Lovers to Enemies to Lovers, Ascended Astarion) Completed work!
contains some Shadowheart x fem!reader
Masterlist
the ascension changed the person Astarion was, or so you believed. you broke up and parted ways after defeating the netherbrain, thinking it was for the best, but when you see him again 6 months later at the reunion, you realize you never truly moved on. and neither did he.
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Meet Me In The Woods (predator/prey)
read on ao3
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it's astarion's turn to keep watch for the night. everyone's off to bed and he's still gone hunting and nowhere to be seen. you refuse to be the one to fill in for him again, so you venture into the woods looking for where he was last seen.
Midnight's Embrace (weed, polyamory)
astarion x female!reader x halsin
read on ao3
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you can’t recall the last time you had a real, good night of sleep. your fight with the nether brain is approaching fast and your anxiety is only increasing. halsin proposes to try a special brand of herbs to alleviate your mind. turns out this herb also awoke something else in you.
Nothing But A Dream (somnophilia)
read on ao3
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you've agreed to take things slow with astarion, only partaking in nighttime activities when he specifically desires them, and this morning, he wants you. but he would hate to intrude on your precious beauty sleep.
Run, Little Fox (predator/prey, hate sex, mildly dubious consent)
read on ao3
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this brat of a rogue questioned your leadership one time too many, it is time he learns his place, and youll do it the only way he'll listen to you: with a challenge. if you win, he will be held accountable for his actions, but if he wins, he gets to use you every night. it doesn't matter anyway, you'll win... won't you?
Public Display of Affection (A!A, jealousy, semi-public/loud sex, hints of voyeurism feat. Gale)
read on ao3
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his consort - his beautiful, too kind for her own good - forever young lover. she was his, and his only, and he believed it was long overdue to make that statement clear among the rest of their group. after tonight, the only name spiling from her luscious lips would be his.
Death is Not an Escape (Mature, Dead By Daylight AU, heavy angst)
read on ao3
read on tumblr
it wasn't supposed to end like this, they were supposed to get out and defeat the absolute - together. but as a dark fog swallowed them whole, their fates changed drastically.
The Ways of Worship (Priest/Modern AU, Corruption)
read on ao3
read on tumblr
this faith was all you've ever known. so when you wake up a morning with the dreadful feeling that you've lost it, you do the one thing that makes sense - confess to your local priest. when he offers his guidance with the promise of making you whole again, you accept without a second thought. your first lesson begins tonight.
Remember Me (Angst, Audio adaptation)
read on ao3
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you can't make sense of where you are or even how you ended up in this cell - hells, you're not even sure of who you are at this point; any memories of your past are a blur. it's all the more confusing when a group of adventurers come to rescue you, and a particularly worried pale elf takes it upon himself to help you remember who you are.
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sleeping next to astarion
A!A's children
your short future with astarion
A!A being possessive of his consort
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fanaticalthings · 5 months ago
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Hey, boss! Quick thought: Jason and Cass are basically Irish twins and Jason is totally that little brother who acts like her older brother/dad and she only lets him do it because its endearing.
Like he consistently shows up at all of her ballet recitals with a bouquet of flowers.
And he takes her out for ice cream when she comes back from a particularly long mission and he knows that the batgirls are unavailable.
And he can tell when she's feeling down about something so he takes her out on his motorbike for wordless drives.
But she's also not afraid of calling little brother just to remind him every now and then.
And he's learnt not to invite her to play video games, unless she's feeling particularly out of touch/having worries about her self-worth, because she will destroy him every time. He doesn't even need to pretend (not that he ever would obviously)
Ahhh I actually really love the idea of Cass and Jason being really close (although it probably wouldn't work out if you still hc Jason as a crimelord/killer) but just the thought that they both understand each other in ways that the others might not is a really nice thought I think.
I also LOVE to hc Cass as the older one, especially since Jason seems like he'd be the older one considering he looks like a fucking 6'4" linebacker that could take you out with one slap
Also also, just based on their canon interpretations as of right now, I actually would LOVE to see an exploration of their characters when put together.
Cass was raised and abused by her father to be a ruthless killing machine since birth, and yet she still turned out to be an incredibly empathetic person who believes anyone can change for the better.
Jason, when he was young also had a rough childhood (grew up in the slums of Gotham, had a father with a criminal background and a mother who succumbed to drug abuse) he'd basically witnessed the worst of Gotham and still believed in the good of people when he was Robin.
In the current comics, Jason heavily wants to turn his lifestyle around, going non-lethal and trying to get away from the more questionable actions of his past. I think it would be super interesting to have Cass empathize with wanting to escape the dark parts of yourself with Jason and also have Jason see his younger self in Cass with how she vehemently strives to save everyone like how he did long ago.
I would so be down for a lil duo run of these two. Maybe have them relate to each other with the roughness of their childhoods or have them explore/share the struggles of trying to better yourself when it feels like everything is against you.
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youareinlove · 4 months ago
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to be in love you have to fight to have the upper hand -> i took your matches before fire could catch me so don’t look now -> love is a ruthless game unless you play it good and right -> love’s a game, wanna play -> was it over when she laid down on your couch, was it over when he unbuttoned my blouse -> baby, let the games begin -> you did a number on me, but honestly baby, who’s counting -> back when we were card sharks, playing games, i thought you were leading me on -> but then you called, showed your hand -> but you called my bluff and saw through all my tells -> my winless fight -> you have beaten my heart -> and you asked me to dance, but i said “dancing is a dangerous game” -> i didn’t know you were keeping count -> he runs because he loves me -> i can take the upper hand and touch your body -> and she's laughing, drawing aces -> hearts are hers for the breaking, there's escape in escaping -> the sign on your heart says it's still reserved for me -> we've been on a winning streak
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chappellrroan · 1 year ago
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this is a state of grace this is the worthwhile fight love is a ruthless game unless you play it good and right THESE ARE THE HANDS OF FATEEEE YOU'RE MY ACHILLES' HEEL this is a golden age of something right and real
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shakirawastaken · 2 years ago
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dsmp if... they were teachers!
they are all high school teachers 
dream: stats - gives his class random stats facts about each exam they take - “the median was 25.8% and the mean was 50% and the mode was 72% andt he t-test showed the results were statistically significant” - wears a green button up formal shirt . every day. with different shades of green  - tries to tame his hair every morning but we’ve all seen that shit. its a mess its so fluffy - you try to fix it in the morning but by the time he gets to school its fucked - “whats the probability mr wastaken’s hair is gonna be tamed today? i bet 5 dollars on 13.2%” “...i hear you guys you know” - is always 20 minutes early - never more than that tho - speedruns grading tests  - if a kid is slacking in class, he makes sure that reflects on his grade - he has this big project each year where he asks all the kids to make a project that relates stats to their real life - his favorite thing ever - he’ll come home and be like “dear, tubbo had this amazing idea, the kids are so innovative”  - tearing up cause his students - best friends with sapnap - u make him a lunch every day and he just trades it with sapnap - everyone thinks hes in an affair with george but he tells them everytime that he has a lovely s/o at home  - one of the teachers everyone has a crush on  - is always standing at his desk like in front of it and leaning back - does not use the whiteboard he just has slideshows  - the room is sparsely decorated - its mainly old projects that people did - has a wall with all the cards and stuff kids gave him, its behind his desk 
sapnap: pe/ basketball + football coach - bro - he’s the type of coach/teacher that when he has one of his atheletes in his class he’s RUTHLESS - “pick it up tommy!! is this how you’re gonna be in the game on friday!!! i hope not!!” - jokingly ofc - if ur not one of his athletes he’s nice dw  - still makes everyone call him coach tho - how on earth do u spell athletes i think that’s right - will let you sit out if he can tell ur hurting - knows when a kid is faking it - BUT if you use the “im on my period” trick he doesn’t even question it - “coach im on my period” “okay ur good sit out for today” - likes giving romance advice for some reason - “coach :((( jared blh blah [insert problem]” “omg okay here’s what u do” - pretends he’s in a relationship with karl (u know about it ofc) - so when u show up to one of his games and kiss him all the players are like - “YOURE NOT DATING MR JACOBS” and he just laughs and kisses you again - wears shorts or sweats with a tshirt no matter what - “im a pe teacher fuck professional”  - makes fun of dream for like no reason  - his favorite unit is the flag football unit and his least favorite is the line dance one - but uses it as an opportunity to play country music and visit his roots amen - just imagine sapnap teaching u line dancing HAAHAH okay im done here 
george: comp sci - doesnt give a shit about lesson planning - shows up, glances at the syllabus and just jumps into it - it ends up working in the end - believes in a work to learn method - he doesnt teach, he assigns projects and helps the kids out - so if the kid is like comp sci EXPERT they can just pop off and george doesnt have to worry - but if the kid struggles a bit heres there to help :] - the whole room is blue cause thats all he can see - he looks so uncomfortable when he wears like long sleeve button ups so you unbutton the first one every morning before he leaves  - refuses to wear casual clothing to school ever  - unless its pajama day ayeeee - once he was teaching the whole class how to download something or some shit and forgot to stop sharing his screen  - so he went to text you he was like “doing good love? see you later :]” - and everyone was like - “MR NOTFOUND??” and he was like “wot.” “YOURE NOT DATING MR WASTAKEN??” “no ofc not mr wastaken is ugly” - cue the sounds of breaking glass from mr wastaken’s room  - he has a tv on display outside his classroom where he showcases his student’s work - for his final he just gives them a theme and says “go off” - they could make a video, a game, a simulator - whatever they want - 1) its less work for george 2) its more entertaining - once made them all code valentine’s day gifts for you - you teared up ngl  - seems like he doesnt care but wants all his kids to succeed - is REALLY good at being patient and helping a kid out but loses all that patience when it comes to other teachers (sapnap, quackity)
karl: chem - absolutely loves the science goggles look. has them on his head always - also lab coats with sweater vest period ahh period uhh  - only doesnt give a second shit about any other science but chemistry - loves lab days like on GOD - the man lives for the one lab where u put sticks w diff elements in the fire and watch the fire change color - guys i swear im a stem major - sapnap comes to watch that lab everytime. every period. even if he has a class - knows sapnap pretends to date him and reciprocates it all through the year - but theres that one kid who remembers his “get to know me” slideshow at the beginning of the year where he had a picture of you two - “mr jacobs..i dont believe ur dating coach sapanp” “whaaaat, pshhh, u lying” - makes so many chemistry jokes with you - “hey baby i think we got chemistry” *giggles manically* “why did you say that” “its literally my job”  - cue a thumbs up from u and an eye roll from him - genuinely loves being a teacher tho - the interaction he gets with students >>>  - he loves the feeling when a student comes up to him after class or even after theyre finished with his classes and go “hey what you taught me really helped” - loves it when a student keeps in contact with him, making him tear up and shi
quackity: spanish - this one was quite..obvious - chaotic teaching style, it doesnt work for everyone - but ITS FUN - lives on teaching through games - kahoots, quiz, scavenger hunt, anything to get out of a slideshow he’ll do - and he figures it out - his quizzes and tests are generally harder than what the games cover but hes a fair grader like he gets that he made it harder - LMFAO HAS A UNIT WHERE HE TEACHES FLIRTS AND SHIT IN SPANISH - brings u in to teach - LMFAOOO “hola amor” “hi?” “what does that mean class” “hi love” “wtf” - laughs maniacally  - also this scenario - “hey mr q can i get extra credit for this” “for what” “ *student swears agressively in spanish*”  “....yeah ill give u some points dont tell principal phil” - jokingly pines over both coach sapnap and mr jacobs - “guys coach sapnap *heart eyes* and mr jacobs *heart eyes*” “please just teach us spanish” - but everyone knows its a joke and ur it for him - he LOVES the food unit - he borrows the kitchens from the home ec room to teach people how to make traditional spanish foods - but GODDAMN he cant cook  - so it ends badly - also he has a thing on his wall for the fifa world cup where its like an elimination thing - face painted his face the mexican flag when the game happened - was this close to cancelling class when mexico was out
wilbur: theater  - i wish he was MY theater teacher in high school - one of the only non-toxic teachers - wears a long ass coat i forgot the name - TRENCHCOAT. for dramatics. its giving severus snape  - always wants to put on musicals but phil said  “you can only do one musical per year” - does that tik tok trend where he has a wall of musicals and rips one off each day and the last one standing is the one they put on - tries so so so hard to get the rights to hamilton, doesnt obviously - so he does stuff like in the heights, dear evan hansen, etc - IF A KID WRITES A MUSICAL AND APPROACHES HIM YOU BEST KNOW HES ALREADY SAYING YES TO PUTTING IT ON WITHOUT A SECOND *THOUGHT* - he loves supporting his students in stuff theyre passionate about even if it isnt music/theater related - once went to the schools water polo game cause one his student mentioned offhandedly in class that they didnt have anyone coming - tommy is his teacher’s assistant person  - he runs the improv lessons while wil observes him teaching - “okay kids youre all aliens and ur abducting mr soot” “tommy..” - its so funny when theyre together  - rumor has it theyre brothers along with mr blade and phil is their dad - “class please, philza minecraft is not my father.” “okay son” “PHIL WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE” - brings u in one day with the excuse of teaching them how to be in love - in reality just has a whole class sing a long to disney love songs while u sit there like why am i here - you pressure him to put on shows YOU want to see - “wil put on high school musical” “nO! WHAT AM I in high school thats so basic” “yes. you are in high school. technically” - puts on high school musical - HES THE TEACHER WHO SHIPS KIDS TOGETHER in the form of making them play love interests  - its giving mrs darbus from high school musical - i was in high school musical i played sharpay 
lmk if u want to see more members as teachers!! :D and what else u want to see period sorry it was so long okay BYEEE
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