#Just finished my first playthrough and UGH
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Steam should come with a warning when you try to install Disco Elysium that says "this will irrevocably change your life for the better, but you will never find anything as good as this again"
#Just finished my first playthrough and UGH#Works that both greatly inspire me and make me feel I should give up creating entirely because I will never make anything like this#SCREAMS#Anyways#disco elysium#bobo.txt
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Ada and Annetteâs interaction is so underrated. I love them. They sound like two high school mean girls from rival friendship groups, or whatever the equivalent is in the resident evil universe.
#this has been sitting in my drafts FOR OVER TWO YEARS#I need to play re2r again soon#itâs probably my fave of all the remakes#I donât include 1 because thatâs more a remaster#although I still have to finish my professional playthrough on 4r and separate ways first#fuck it maybe Iâll take a break from that#anyways#weskerfied try not to ramble in the tags challenge#annette birkin#ada wong#resident evil 2 remake#resident evil 2#Annette has the biggest mean girl vibes#âIâm warning you doctorâ âoh yeah?â *proceeds to light a body on fire#sheâs like come on Ada why donât you fuck around and find out#they both just rile each other up and I love it#even if itâs a tiny segment of the game and they converse like 3 times#I just love their interaction UGH#I genuinely canât think of a better comparison than two popular girls who hate each other lmao#and Leon is just the kid who seems to be involved in all the drama unwillingly#william is the weird kid who does questionable shit and everyone is lowkey scared of him#tag yourself Iâm Will#hmmm thinking about a high school au now
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was getting so fed up & irritated w astarion this playthrough that when i failed the persuasion check to get him to save the spawn & he decided to leave, i was just like fine!! see if i care!!!!! iâll just get a hireling!! whatever!!!! itâll be great not to have to put up with you anymore. good fucking riddance. good. bye.ďżź
so why do i miss him so much?? his exaggerated gestures. his petty little comments. i was convinced i didnât like him, but against my will the fail elf has grown on me. ugh.
#i heard heâs a good durge romance option so i guess iâll do that next playthrough#absence makes the heart grow fonder. i guess. ugh#itâs not as devastating as my first playthrough when i killed shadowheart and just could not go on#i just started over. i need her.#i will finish this with my hireling and project my feelings onto my durge#but since there is no tumblr in the forgotten realms my durge will take this embarrassing secret to their grave#âwhatever who cares i never liked him anywayâ (lying)#bg3 spoilers#i do think itâd be a funny dynamic to have a paladin durge who strategically sends astarion on solo stealth missions#whenever durge is about to do something he knows is gonna get an eyeroll from astarion#i think of those -1 disapprovals from him as like light huffs or scoffs that start to get really annoying#like hello i am trying to prove to everyone and myself that I am a Good Person & this murder thing is clearly some kind of curse
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DA: Veilguard - Talk of Solas
Having now finished the game I want to have a very not at all nuanced discussion about Solas
God of lies in-fucking-deed. That asshole can't say three words without lying four times.
"I am sorry for it." NO THE FUCK YOU AIN'T. Second verse, same as the first. He's always "sorry" and but never actually apologetic. TBH, I don't even buy his hidden "regrets" anymore. He is PRIDE and it fucking shows. The only thing he regrets is that he didn't get his fucking way. And I want to say here that I am a therapist by trade and I quite literally do genuinely believe that Solas is so used to being able to gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss his way through people that he doesn't give a shit that what he's saying is not a fucking apology. An apology starts with the words "I'm sorry" and ends with you changing your fucking behavior. That last part is something Solas consistently refuses to fucking do, right up until the very end (at least for me). It's giving "I'm sorry you were hurt (but not sorry that I hurt you)" vibes.
As my brother said while I was ranting about him (Our Dad used to say this to us all the time as kids): "Don't be sorry, be better." Solas refuses to actually be better, or even try. He is just like Elgar'nan, including his adamant belief that he is better than Elgar'nan.
I enjoyed Spartan-kicking his fucking ass into the Fade and I'll enjoy doing it again. I wish there had been an option to point out to him that everyone who ever believed in him has died by his own hand. And maybe there is and I just didn't take it. Ugh, it's gonna be hard to do a redemption playthrough for him.
And then, as you punt him into an eternal prison... what are you his parting words? "I am a god." Yes... yes you are. And all the lies about how you aren't are just that, lies.
All that to say...
Fucking A+ writing on Solas Bioware. A+++++.
I knew that motherfucker was a liar, ROOK knew that motherfucker was a liar, and I was *still* surprised when he betrayed Rook (not by the betrayal itself, but how it played out).
#Solas#dragon age#The Veilguard#DATV#DAV#Dragon Age: The Veilguard#Dragon Age The Veilguard#Fen'Harel
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DE â :Kim and Harry: Procreate on iPad Pro
So I recently finished Disco Elysium after the Director's Cut became available on the PS Plus Game Catalog. I've wanted to play it for a few years, and was excited to finally see what all the hype was about. First of all, it was NOT what I expected, in the sense that I usually play more action-based games, so playing a narrative RPG was really a different experience. Secondly, WHAT an interesting universe this game takes place it... I think I loved it because it was essentially a Sherlock AU, with a neurodivergent player character and his stoic and long-suffering partner, solving a really interesting case... (GUYS they even had a Three-Garridebs-style moment in it!!!). And thirdly, GOSH the voice actors in the director's cut REALLY makes the game super special. Kim's voice is yummy, please read me the dictionary, sir đ
AND THEN THERE'S THE TWO PROTAGS. OMG I LOVE them so much. Kim is my little mew mew, I love him so, SO much. I love Kim and Harry's dynamic (if you play the game so that Kim trusts you) and some of the best one liners in my playthrough came from him, LOL. Just, ugh, I now see what all the hype was about for this game when it came out. And of course I inevitably shipped them, as is my way, and I was SO UPSET that I couldn't romance Kim, LOL. Sad that a second game probably won't ever happen (after reading about what happened behind the scenes, anyway), but I've immersed myself for the past 3 months in the DE fanfic rabbit hole, OMG. I'm so obsessed. It prompted me to then, of course, want to draw them. So here we are.
Not my best at all, but more just I was itching to draw them so much and I got this one done faster than anything I SHOULD be working on these days, LOL. I hope you'll excuse my burning needs, hahha. If it wasn't for that other stuff I have to get done, I probably would have a huge backlog of DE fanart like I do with DBH and Moon Knight, hahahhaha.
Anyhoo, Kim and Harry, best cop duo on this side of Revachol, LOL. I will absolutely be drawing them again once I'm done my FTH pieces! This is my current hyperfixation and I am very happy about it LOL
đźÂ IâM ON INSTAGRAM at stephdrawsfanart đ¨ @stephratte��is my Primary Fanart Blog! Art Š to S.G.M. RattĂŠ. Do not repost or sell.
(Tags below cut, dm to be added/removed)
@queerbeess
@ayryn-art
@antisocial-otaku
@havetardiswilltimetravel
@yorkiepug
@tea-and-gingernuts
@quantum-sparrow
@chinike
@chained-to-the-mirror
@almosttomorocco
@loveismyrevolution
#disco elysium#de fanart#kimharry#harrykim#disco elysium fanart#kim kitsuragi#harrier du bois#sdjl myart#sdjl de#sdjl kimharry#artists on tumblr
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So ��� Bethesda broke Fallout 4's script extender. Because of course they did. What better way to celebrate the release of your new TV show than to stall people's ongoing playthroughs? Excellent work. I don't even want an Enclave quest. It's Creation Club nonsense, so it won't actually be a proper quest anyway.
I want to finish my Sim Settlements 2 playthrough. Ugh.
So while I'm waiting for the dust to settle on that, I thought I'd give Fallout 76 another go. I am rebuilding my mod list for Fallout 3, but that's a work in progress. And Fallout 76 is right there.
I created a new character, because I haven't played this thing in ages and I know they've changed a bunch of the mechanics. And oh - ha. I mean, I had thought from the beginning that creating a game without NPCs was a terrible idea, because it's hard to invest in saving an empty world. But the addition of them makes playing the game's original main quest a distinctly bizarre experience.
I don't mean that I'm suddenly pro-empty world. Not at all. In general the presence of factions and personalities and people you can care about it a good thing.
But when they made this game, the writers and quest designers were given "empty world" as a parameter within which they had to work. And they did.
It's sort of an interesting, even bold, choice for a storyline because it does not allow you to feel good about yourself at all. Most Fallout games do. Oh, you can play evil if you want, sure, and there are a handful of side quests that are genuinely no win scenarios. But mostly? You can save the world. And you will probably have a better experience if you try to: there's more to do when you talk to the NPCs and deal with their problems rather than just murdering everyone and taking their stuff.
But Fallout 76 is just judging you.
I keep thinking about its promotional song â that really upbeat cover of Take Me Home, Country Roads, and all the imagery in the old trailer, about rebuilding and looking to the future. But all of that is functionally a lie, and the key lines in that song come towards the end:
I hear her voice in the mornin' hour, she calls me The radio reminds me of my home far away Drivin' down the road, I get a feelin' That I should've been home yesterday, yesterday â Take Me Home, Country Roads
You should have been home yesterday. You should have been home a thousand yesterdays ago. This story is all about the past, and a rebuilding effort you neglected to join. It hits you with the guilt straight away, as the very first place the game takes you is an old outpost of emergency service personnel who just kept on doing their jobs after the bombs fell. It's their notes and recordings that teach you how to survive.
Of course you encounter less pleasant people later: raiders and Enclave, and honestly I have little patience for any iteration of The Brotherhood of Steel. But even there, you can see that the misunderstandings and conflicts and general fuck ups might have been resolved with a competent mediator.
And that is exactly what you are. You're a Fallout protagonist. You don't have the time to spend ten years sitting in a lab, but you excel at travelling from town to town and dealing with whatever obstacle is stopping a faction from moving forward. Fallouts 1-4 and assorted spin offs have taught us all that.
Even in universe, Vault 76 is stated to be full of literal geniuses. It is packed with doctors and scientists and engineers: exactly the people the world needed to deal with a combination of plague and environmental crisis.
If you were there, you could have fixed this.
But you were not there. You were sitting comfortably in a vault, while other, better people tried to save the world.
And they were almost there. They had a vaccine. Even with everything, they had a vaccine. They did the work, they had a plan. As you play through this quest, you stand upon the shoulders of giants at almost every stage, implementing the very last step in a plan that really does work. Had they lived, even a few months longer ... but they didn't, and you did nothing to help them.
It wasn't even necessary to spend 25 years in that vault, as it is abundantly clear that the area around 76 has been habitable this whole time. Challenging, sure: I am in no way suggesting that it was an easy existence. But it was not instant irradiated death.
Every other Fallout protagonist steps out of their vault (or other entry scenario) in time to make things right. Maybe just in time, but nevertheless. They walk into a fractured world and get to work. But not you. You took the easy route.
How proud are you of that Best Dental Hygiene award now?
Given that it is set so close to the Great War, and deals with first generation survivors, it gives one of the best looks at the cynical cruelty of Vault-Tec: when they talk about rebuilding the world, it only means rebuilding for its own benefit and profit. Anyone not part of their plan is more than welcome to die in a hole.
It ties in very nicely with the television series, actually. Lucy laments that she was waiting to rebuild the world, but it all happened without her - and Vault-Tec actively tried to destroy that new world (and at least up to a point, seems to have succeeded). Her people waited over 200 years, but it didn't take that long. Twenty-five were quite enough.
But with the new version ... I mean, it really takes the sting out of it. It looks like everybody had a few rough years there, but it's all turned out fine. There's a burgeoning civilisation here, with homesteads and caravans and trade. I can't go two steps without an NPC asking to borrow a bobby pin, and even the raiders are more territorial than outright destructive (although â is nobody going to go up that completely safe little hill and give poor Miguel a funeral? Come on guys, clean up the damn corpses).
The tragedy of the whole thing, and the weight of your own inaction, is largely gone. You can't reshape the world and still make the same impact with that narrative.
I don't know, I guess I just can't quite get behind the whole multiplayer-ness of the thing. The world can't really change as you complete quests. You can't really rebuild. But likewise, if the world does change, it has to change for everyone at the same time, regardless of where they are in the story.
It could still work, I think, if you could play through that story and then see the caravans come over the hill, and start to rebuild the world.
Because that might feel a bit like redemption.
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Just finished a bg3 playthrough for the first time today and did a redeemed durge x Gale route and the epilogue party was so funny because
"Dark Lord Astarion" was like "I missed you sm life is actually so fucking boring without you", Jaheira was like "oh how nice it is to be understood again" when Mordriel jested back with her, Shadowheart was ecstatic to see him and teased him and was the one to initiate a hug, Karlach (who had been w Mordriel the whole time since they went to Avernus together) was so ecstatic that her flames even turned blue when he hugged her, Minsc was super excited to tell his hostage about Mordriel and the others, Lae'zel was so sentimental and sweet and told Mordriel unprovoked that even if she had a knife pressed to her throat she wouldn't deny it, Wyll was bugged and at first thought Mordriel was Lae'zel lmao (I'm assuming an origin and companion dialogue tag was the same when it should've been different and because she became a Vlaakith-hunter, it made Mordriel look like the Vlaakith-hunter Lae'zel), Halsin was like "god these last 6 months have been SO long without you god I missed you so much" and after being hugged the first time said that it was def worth the wait and after the second time was like "I could get used to this" and also his hug animation had him CONTINUING TO HOLD MORDRIEL'S HANDS FOR LIKE 4 SECONDS AFTER THE HUG ENDED, Tara was pretty annoyed with Mordriel because he helped Gale ascend but because he wasn't a total ass she did actually sort of come around and go "I know once he had his mind set on it you couldn't have helped it but ugh :(", etc....
and then motherfucking Gale, who Mordriel romanced, called him over saying "my friend" LIKE WDYM YOUR FRIEND? YOU'RE TOGETHER? though I believe that was bugged as well lol so I don't think that was supposed to happen and then didn't even say he missed him like you haven't seen the love of your life in half a year girly pop.
Also, throughout the acts, Lae'zel, Astarion and Halsin all tried to initiate something w Mordriel, so I'm headcanoning this as them all having crushes on him even after these months lol because those three especially had the most intimate (intimate as in lovey-dovey/close, not sexual) greetings and such towards him.
#bg3#bg3 epilogue#hey what the fuck gale#even ascended astarion was like âmissed you so much friendâ
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Finished my first playthrough of lost signals, stats and thoughts below:
1. Told Nick to avoid the portal, gave Maria advice, got Evelyn home safely, saved Shelley by telling her not to leave, helped Hank with the photo + shoe.
2. Was friendly with Violet and Charlie but didnât get the achievements for it, though they both sided with me, and my final stats said I befriended them but Olivia left Camena
3. I alienated Olivia this run, and next run Iâm gonna try to befriend her
4. I found all the letters
5. I had Riley enter the portal (next run the plan is to be Olivia, idk how anyone can pick Jacob, poor Athena đĽş)
This was GREAT. I canât believe we got to not just hear from Alex, but actually bring her back??? !!! Wow. Ugh she is still one of my fave game characters ever, I loved her in this as well.
I picked Riley to stay because I felt bad that sheâd have to have two bad parent/child relationships in her life, and she really didnât have much in the way of contacts, and I wanted Rex to get to be happy too. But tbh that was a super hard choice, cause Olivia really did seem to want to stay. Next run Iâll let her.
As great as the adaptive scoring is, I miss having songs from the soundtrack stuck in my head, and I donât have that from my first playthrough at least. No music during the credits either, which is disappointing, I love the credits music from the first game.
Now, questions:
Do you think all the kids from game 1 were trapped? They didnât talk much, just Alex, which made me think it was just Alex and her memories of them. But I guess you could read it either way. In which case, are they all free of it now or just Alex? And did Alex just pop back into existence? Had she been missing, or not remembered? Did she pop back in at the same age she was, or did she suddenly have false memories of the five years she was gone, or did she pop back to the night she disappeared and just never disappeared?
Thereâs an achievement called

Which looks like it involves talking to a younger Jacob on the radio or walkie. How? My only thought right now is maybe checking the radio and walkie after setting the garland tear to 1990? Or something like that? I need to figure how to do that.
I also need to figure out why I didnât pop achievements for making friends with violet and Charlie even though they both defended me against olivia. And I need to figure out how to befriend Olivia. Let her do the thing in the community center, I guess? I broke her radio on my first playthrough.
Open to advice!
#oxenfree 2 lost signals#oxenfree spoilers#lost signals spoilers#oxenfree 2 spoilers#lost signals#oxenfree#Turner plays lost signals#oxenfree 2
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describing my MCL profile (with @mclmora's template :D)
hi! as you can guess I'm yet again thinking about MCL, as one does, and I thought filling this template could be fun :3 đ¸ user's profile + favorite outfits
đ name: ?
đ b-day: 08/12
đ zodiac sign(s): Saggitarius Sun, Scorpio Moon.
đ nationality: Salvadorian.
đ favorite flirt(s): Lysander, Armin and Nathaniel.
đ player since: 19/12/2015
đŽ Currently playing â Episode 32: Happy Life, Double Life! (Armin's route); Episode 29: The Love of Art (Lysander's route)
đ lom meters (US server)
nathaniel, 95%
castiel, -52%
lysander, 95%
armin, 75% (đ)
kentin, 35%
âanswering questions: - which club did you pick? I picked the gardening club, because even though in real life I cannot take care of a plant for the life of me (i've tried) i'm even less... skilled, in sports lol. Don't get me wrong I think both things are fun but it's just not my thing.
headcanon time: My Candy signed up for the gardening club, befriended Jade (and had a crush on him at the start of the year) and because she was more a danger than anything in the garden (shenanigans ensue) , she ended up switching clubs, then became representative of her class (I imagine the high school has a lot of students, she's from a different section than the other characters on the first year.) and that's how she ended up befriending Melody and Nath. In the second year, Jade switches schools :c he was one of her best friends there.
-which is your favorite ep?
oh, don't ask me that :") I'll better give you a list in NO specific order because I really, REALLY can't choose: 17 (bye Debrah), 21 (the play!!!), 23 (nath's house), 31 and 32 (lysander's arc), 33 (iris party) and 40 the finale of course! - which non-datable character you like the most?
Priya wasn't datable in HSL so her lol, also Jade and Dajan are really cool in my mind, even thought they appear in only two episodes for some reason I always include them in my headcanons. Mmm, this is hard lol because I like a lot of characters from different reasons and it's hard to compare them to each other yk. Like, objectively we may feel more inclined to say Rosa or Alexy, but that's because we know them really well. But then there's Iris best girl for example, Leigh is also really nice. And then I have fanon versions of Melody and Karla that, in my mind, make me like them more...
It's tough man, but being honest, probably Amber because yes in HSL she was a BULLY I think, as a character, I really like her, she's compelling to me.
đŠđ˝âđuniverity life: to start
âanswering questions:
-what do you think of the removal of kentin, armin and lysandre?
because I have had a lot of time to reflect on this, and now we have alternative life and everything, I think it doesn't hit me as much as it did when I saw the news the first time. Of course it's still sad, because reading all the amazing headcanons people have for these three LIs for that season really makes me wish they did something different but hey! I think the new routes weren't as bad as people make them to be, because they constantly like to compare the new v.s. the old routes and that's not the point. The point is for people to have fun, and i've seen fanarts, fanfics and blogs dedicated to Hyun, Rayan and Priya :D also, adding Priya as a love interest IN MY OPINION was a really nice choice, a lot of people liked her before and now being able to date her??? queen, just give me the ring.
-which one is your favorite episode?
I haven't played this season myself, but i've watched the playthrough of it on YT (planetsucrette te adoro) and honestly? episode 15 "Emotional Rollercoaster" HAS to be at least in my top three for this season, yes i'm a nathaniel girlie but idk, all the drama and the build up and the illu!!! ugh it's so good, I really enjoyed watching it and I cannot imagine finishing that episode and have to WAIT for the continuation!!! the intrigue!!!
Also Rosa's story reaaally pulled my heart strings, i'm going to be honest with you, and there's a scene where Candy has this memory box and there's a bunch of photos from High School, and there's one with them and Alexy and the way they narrate that part is just- is fantastic, I loved it a lot. I think it's on ep 11.
-is there something you don't like about this season?
uh... well, for the longest time, I didn't even wanted to know what it was about, mainly because my interest remained in HSL and the fact that 2/3 of my boys weren't even there was not motivation, at all. There's nothing at the top of my head that I have to critique in general. Maybe if I gave it a little bit more thought, but eh, not in the mood.
đ alternate life
lysander: (1st episode)
questions for you âĄ
how do you feel about his new design?
i'm in love with his new design, not even going to lie to you. literal heart eyes every time i see him đđđđđ
what do you think of his character development?
mmm... i think i said somewhere else in the SEA of post I have rambling about this game lol but, I agree with the sentiment that they could have took a different approach to his story in general. He's still charming, of course, but i'm completely biased in that.
non-datable characters that I love
yes the whole HSL cast. i don't care. they forever will live free in my mind.
general questions âĄ
-how did you discover the game?
thanks to a friend who really liked anime :) she was my best friend at the time but I ended up falling in love with the game thanks to roleplaying with two of my best friends in the world + my new bestie because the other one switched schools lol. Now that I think about it, I don't know what her route was xd
Random fact: Those two friends I mentioned? They are both in love with Lysander and are always telling me they are going to steal him from me JAJAJAJA. All of us are head over heels for Armin though. One of them is Kentin's route and Castiel's route (yes, the complete opposites lol) and the other one loves Castiel TO DEATH. Also, my IRL bestie is also Castiel route and uh, quick question: Why does EVERYONE I know love Castiel while the dude literally hates ME? I'm saying like, in every damn account he always manages to be my LOWEST lom. Wanna know why? because I always befriend Nath.
-which one is your favorite special episode (ex: halloween 2011, easter 2012, ect)?
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH NOOOOO DON'T DO THIS!!!!! but-
I have fond memories of playing the Valentine's 2018 event, it was the last one :"""") (i think). Why do I remember you ask? Because I did screamed when I saw this illu for the first time:
look at my boys. LOOK AT THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-have you played the spin-offs? if yes, which one was your favorite?
sadly no :c i'm short on AP yk, I'm a free to play girlie till the day I die.
đ the end?
and that's the end :))) If you've read any part of this uh, thank u??? I started writing this tag as a fun silly activity but I ended up getting invested and thinking more about my silly AU. Also, you may have noticed I just call my candy "Candy" and that's not because they don't have names, but the reason is because they are my real names and I don't feel comfortable sharing them online!
I've tried to search for synonyms of my names to use for them, but they just don't feel like me and at the end of the day, My Candy Love is supposed to be played from your perspective and so, yes my candys have different personalities and dynamics with the characters but idk, they are based around me and so giving them other names doesn't really work for me??? it's a matter of preferences I guess.
i'm really fond of this game, but it's a part of me that i only get to talk openly about here on tumblr or with those 2-3 friends, so writing all of this was a sweet experience.
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ughhh i can feel the fallout obsession mounting. i think i finally have a solid idea down on letting all my couriers be canon to one playthrough which is the most fun way for me to tackle bethesda games (obsidian i know but shhh it's the same vibes in this context).
put under a read more because i'm a yappy bitch
i think my main idea is to have one "main" courier and have the rest of my couriers be a part of some sort of entourage that followed them around prior to the events of New Vegas. Benny and the Khans only shoot a few of them, while some others may have ran away, and others yet were out on patrol, and come back to search for their missing group as their motivation to wander the wastes.
the main courier 6 is the one who's playthrough is directly canon. i'll mould every other courier's story around the events of the main playthrough once i finish them all and decide on it. some couriers will realistically play more minor roles in factions, some will be mostly just dealing with dlc content, others yet i may truly never give a real purpose in the oc canon. i imagine some of these characters will tackle mod content once i get that set up.
i'm already absolutely teeming with ideas for couriers though. Aster is my first girl, she's a violence loving, robotfucking, man hating dyke. he wasn't particularly pleasant before his life was upended, and he certainly isn't now. her main priority is Benny, however learning about the Legion sends her down a spiral. i have her stuck with Boone for the time being and i reallly like to picture their relationship. "learning about how your wife was treated has radicalized me against the Legion. i will gladly kill jeannie may for her. i will hunt down legion to the ends of the earth with you in her honor. vegence shall burn bright for how horribly she was treated. i can barely fucking tolerate You though. let's never speak and only ever share smokes to communicate." and i think it's ideal for both of them really. Aster will side with the NCR but it's mostly just because he looked up to Tandy. total role model for her. her actual feelings on the NCR as an organization are completrly devoid from her happy willingness to work with them due to what they Could be.
another idea is that i wanna make a total rome nerd. he doesn't like participating in combat much, but he is a lover of gore and viscera. probably a focus on science medical and energy weapons like a nerddddd. i want him to have been in some sort of established kind of leader role for the group he's a part of, so when a lot more of the more leadership focused members find out he's being Caesar's personal doctor and concubine they freak the fuck out and vow to kill him.
i don't want him to particularly enjoy violence against random unconsenting people? i think that's something he's groomed into during his time with the Legion. initially he learns of the legion's atrocities around and he goes "ugh these guys are giving rome a bad name. ugh. i bet if i jerk off my awesome roman knowledge they'll just make me emperor or something." but he finds himself just getting wrapped around Caesar's thumb really. after some long philosophical talks with the guy he starts to get attached and eventally asks himself "man. you're living In Rome. this is like. a dream come true. i mean sure these people are awful and horrible but i've already secured a solid position of power here. there is no real pro to me leaving. i love gore anyway i love rome i'm not a woman and Caesar likes me. it would be smartest to just stay here and bury my morals six feet under." <- mind you he is not living in rome he's living in a community of roman larpers. he is delusional. but i can see how he got there.
at the start, his ultimate goal is to help people. i don't think that changes by the end much, but his own morality on who's right to help changes. he cares more for the people that grow close to him than what he truly belueves is right. so he shifts his focus so solely helping those he cares about.
i think i want one of my non nerds to be ex some sort of military to be bred with the survival of the fittest mindset. makes a good Legion playthrough. i definitely want a pair of siblings that end up siding with the NCR and Legion and have angst about it. and godddd i need to brainstorm more
#kat will yap#fallout#fallout new vegas#oc: aster#if you're wondering why unnamed legion dork has so much more written about him than aster does it's because#i conceptualized him with societal idealogies and philosophies. i'm mostly feeling aster out as i play her
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[Bloodborne playthrough #5]
Things are going well, I think. My beloved Threaded Cane is now +9 and the only thing separating me from Micolash is arachnophobia (ugh).
Still don't understand how I'm doing this but I got The One Reborn on first try. Killed Patches in the Lecture Building for no reason except him being a spider. Oddly enough he was still there in the Nightmare Frontier: I had fun throwing pebbles at him to make him fall (yeah I'm that petty).
I don't know if I should tackle the DLC just yet. I still have the Nightmare Frontier, Cainhurst and the Upper Cathedral Ward (I hate brainsuckers so much) to finish too.
As far as bosses go: tried Logarius once, almost won but ran short of blood vials; also tried the Celestial Emissary once and got obliterated by lasers somehow. I suppose I got careless but my Hunter shall have his revenge.
Good thing is: I have a ton of rather pretty screenshots because I can't help being a tourist in plague-ridden cities. There will absolutely be posts once I sort these out!
#bloodborne#gaming#playthrough#virtual photography#ps4#i'm still baffled by how well this is going honestly#i suck so much more at sekiro#my hardest boss was rom and she only took me three attempts wtf?#man i love this game
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I'm finally at the point to travel to Tearstone Island for my first playthrough. I am... not ready, emotionally. Like not at all. like I know what happens in theory, but to see it... with my first Rook? I'm gonna cry I know I am. almost tempted to go hide in one of my other playthroughs. and just... never finish the game.
UGH. my heart is going to hurt for a bunch of fictional characters (a bunch of pixels!) again, I know it.
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Veilguard Thoughts
I finished playing Veilguard last week and went immediately back into playing it. And now that I've had the time to sit and think about the game I still love it just as much as I did when I finished.
Spoilery thoughts under the break.
Gonna break this down into parts. Story, Art, Characters, Romance. I want to preface this that, I don't often have a lot of criticisms for stories I love what I love and there's very little that can ruin it for me. So there's not going to be a lot of negative thoughts here.
First up, I want to talk about Rook. I adore Rook, but I will say of all the things that bothered me about the choices we could make for Rook in this game, there wasn't really enough of a difference between the three major options in dialogue choices. Like, even the tough love sterner type reactions to things seemed really soft. I don't play mean characters, I just don't enjoy it, so not having an option to be evil doesn't really bother me especially in the way the story for this game goes.
I really love how well integrated Rook felt in the story, how there were people out there who knew Rook before. It made you feel more like a part of the story. However I would have liked more options in game to use the faction to direct your answers. You'd see it here or there with some of them but most of the time it didn't really have a huge impact and there were a few times where Rook would say something and I'd be left like ??? how do you not know this. We seemed to get more choices as an Elf than as a member of our faction.
Story wise, I'm really pleased with how it turned out. The ending destroyed me and I got the "Good" ending with only one loss to the team. Both of the villains actually felt like a threat and were a LOT more compelling to me than Corypheus was. I loved seeing Bellara's struggle with coming to terms about what the elves have done in the past. Would have been interesting to see more of an uproar from the elves about it all but honestly not that bothered by it.
I do kind of wish there were a couple more maybe not hard choices (Like Which city to save) but maybe more moments of struggle for the team. Their quarrels among one another felt very quickly overcome. And I know a lot of this is time constraint both in creation and how much you can put into a game. As they said this game is about found family as well as everything else and having them be at odds with one another would have been an interesting way to play off the more bleak ending of the game.
Like aside from saving Minrathous having dire consequences for Lucanis' story none of the other choices you make really have a huge impact until the end.
I also agree that the first little bit of the game is very railroady. But once you get past that I found everything very enjoyable. Lucanis' romance and Taash's romance I think so far are the more disappointing ones? I adore the few scenes we did get for Lucanis and really liked the first start to Taash's but they kinda feel like they didnt get the same attention as some of the others.
My second playthrough I've enjoyed paying more attention to certain things, specifically Varric. Because the first playthrough I had some moments where I was thinking "That's a weird choice." Now its a "Ahh, I get it now." I suspected in the first playthrough after we fought the two blighted dragons but brushed it off.
I feel like the characters are the best part of this game, the companions are just ugh I adore them. I also really love the visual style of the game and I know a lot of people don't but once I got Rook looking how I wanted him to it was perfect to me.
The music though... kind of a letdown. There's a couple songs I really like and then the best songs in the game IMO were the call backs to Inquisition. Especially the lost elf theme at the end if you redeem Solas.
I have over 100 hours into the game already and I can forsee many more. I have a lot of fun in the CC as well and intend on making many many many sliders for people to use.
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Alan Wake 2: Lyric attribution and breakdown of the song "evermore" (by Taylor Swift, ft. Bon Iver) and how it pertains to Alan and Alice's marriage
I was just listening to this song after I finished watching a playthrough of Alan Wake 2 and almost every line was like a gut punch when considering their circumstances. It just perfectly encapsulates their relationship and the feelings of grief and hope they both have of getting back to each other somehow. Ugh, just beautiful. I think someone needs to make an edit of Alan Wake 2 using this song (I would but I have no idea how).
Anyway, I'll put the lyrics and my breakdown under the cut so you can think of Alan and Alice and see what I mean (spoilers ahead so be warned):
Gray November I've been down since July Motion capture Put me in a bad light I replay my footsteps on each stepping stone Trying to find the one where I went wrong Writing letters Addressed to the fire
I mean, if this verse doesn't just scream Alan going through the loop (spiral) in the Dark Place, I don't know what does. Even the part where he gets blinded by the flash of Alice's camera in Parliament Tower makes sense here with the third and fourth lines. And even the last two lines make sense with him writing and destroying and rewriting his works to find an out.
And I was catching my breath Staring out an open window Catching my death And I couldn't be sure I had a feeling so peculiar That this pain would be for Evermore
This part reminds me of that one video of Alice where she describes seeing a little girl losing her balloon out of her window and how that little girl was crying like she lost her whole world and Alice felt like she had too.
Hey December Guess I'm feeling unmoored Can't remember What I used to fight for I rewind the tape but all it does is pause On the very moment all was lost Sending signals To be double crossed
Alan again. The first part is more obvious, as he completely lost his way in the Dark Place and planned to stop writing altogether and just gave up. The second half works with all those videos you find on the scattered TVs in the Dark Place where he sees himself having a mental breakdown in the writer's room.
And I was catching my breath Barefoot in the wildest winter Catching my death And I couldn't be sure I had a feeling so peculiar That this pain would be for Evermore (Evermore)
No specific scene, but definitely reminds me of Alan having to suffer through the dangers of the Dark Place.
Can't not think of all the cost And the things that will be lost Oh, can we just get a pause? To be certain we'll be tall again Whether weather be the frost Or the violence of the dog days I'm on waves, out being tossed Is there a line that I could just go cross?
Alan again, lost on the lake that isn't a lake, but an ocean, trying so hard to find his way to shore. The last line can be a double meaning; Alan must write the perfect line to create a happy ending, or find the right line to cross to remember what needs to be written in order to escape.
And when I was shipwrecked (can't think of all the cost) I thought of you (all the things that will be lost now) In the cracks of light (can we just get a pause?) I dreamed of you (to be certain we'll be tall again) (If you think of all the costs) It was real enough (whether weather be the frost) To get me through (or the violence of the dog days) (Out on waves being tossed) But I swear (is there a line that we could just go cross?) You were there
I think this section of the bridge can be from both Alice and Alan's perspectives. Alice is figuratively shipwrecked due to her grief, Alan a bit more literally considering he's technically at the bottom of a lake. Alan is seeing glimpses of Alice in the Dark Place, and is using his desire to protect her and get back to her to push him into trying to escape again. Alice is using her art to reach through the void to lead Alan in the right direction.
(Edit: Alice also jumping into the Dark Place to help Alan also fits this part of the song.)
And I was catching my breath Floors of a cabin creaking under my step And I couldn't be sure I had a feeling so peculiar This pain wouldn't be for Evermore Evermore (evermore) Evermore This pain wouldn't be for evermore (evermore) Evermore
The first part of the last chorus is definitely Alan stuck in the writer's room, specifically after he was "killed" by the bullet of light and brought back to life. The second part is both of them, their hope making them realize that it will all be okay in the end. This loss is impermanent. The pain won't last. They will see each other again.
Anyway, this was just my silly thoughts about my current favorite video game. Their relationship is so tragically beautiful to me. Hope you enjoyed me overthinking about a song lol.
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I just finished Rain Code for the Nintendo Switch so I thought I'd give my thoughts on it. For those who don't know, Rain Code is a bizarre and unique detective game. This game is best played as blindly as possible, but if you like solving mysteries then of course this game will be perf for you.
The mechanics are fun and easy. There's no hard mode so it's tuned so it's challenging but no so challenging that no one can beat it except expert gamers. I will say the tutorials for like a couple of mechanics could've been explained a little better, but even without it you're gonna figure out what the game wants you to do eventually with minimal problem.
Rain Code is all about diving head first into the mystery labyrinth and using Solution Keys you picked up along the way to unravel the culprit's true nature! They're very exciting and fun.
The music and atmosphere of game were stunning. A city where the rain never ends highlighted in neon lights and even holograms. During my entire playthrough I never got tired of the music once. It was always a vibe.
Downsides? Ugh.... Kodaka has this reoccurring thing where he shows his true colors when it comes to certain types of ppl. Namely fat ppl and ppl of color. I'll never understand why someone who really pushes societal norms with his writing to challenge capitalism and advocate for acceptance of homosexuality would also have such bigotry towards others.
Now I know that sounds pretty bad and trust me I 100% hate it, but I can at least say it's not in your face all time. I won't excuse it, but at least I can ignore it for the most part while enjoying other parts of the game.
Minor Spoilers
I'll give credit where credit is due and say he actually had a couple decent fat characters despite also having a couple of bad ones. His take on POC especially Black people though is just disgusting and I'd rather not dwell on that subject too long. Thankfully the instance happens in the shortest chapter. I sincerely hope Kodaka will change his views to be less racist although I understand that's generally how the Japanese view my ppl lol
End of Spoilers
Overall a very enjoyable game. The characters are wacky and refreshing. The twists are insane. I already expected something huge but I was not prepared at all for the big reveal lol. Def worth a buy.
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The Great Ace Attorney Final Trial Commentary: Day 3, Part 3
This is an ongoing mini-commentary covering the final trial of The Great Ace Attorney (Resolve) in line-by-line detail. Itâs written from a perspective of already knowing the full truth of things, so there will be spoilers for facts that only get revealed later on in the trial. This is not a commentary to read along with oneâs first playthrough!
(The commentary will update on Tuesdays and Saturdays. Check this blog to find any other parts currently posted, and if itâs not yet finished, follow to catch future updates!)
Now that weâre below the readmore, I can add that this isnât quite a commentary for everything going on in the final trial. Itâs focused specifically on Kazuma and whatâs going on in his head, only covering things which are relevant to him in some way (for the most part). I already had a lot to say about him in a big analysis post over on my main blog â but I have even more to say about him during the trial in even more detail, so here we are!
Weâre past the save point, just after Kazumaâs huge emotional breakdown and without any recess for him to have processed and collected his emotions. But of course he managed to pull himself back together in zero time at all, because Kazuma is nothing if not an expert at bottling things up and appearing Completely Fine.
Kazuma:Â âYou were there at the time. So you must testify! You have an obligation to tell the truth about what really went on!â
Ghh, Kazuma is still so desperate here. He knows that Mikotobaâs testimony is his only remaining chance to prove that things really were fabricated and his father was innocent.
(Heâs probably also feeling some kind of way about the realisation that Mikotoba, his guardian, has had an eyewitness account this whole time that could prove his fatherâs innocence, and he never talked about any of it to Kazuma. If only Mikotoba had told Kazuma the truth of what really happened to his father⌠or if only Kazuma had found the courage to confront him about it once he received that letter.)
--- Testimony 4 ---
(As a reminder, Iâm using different testimony-numbering to the gameâs chapter select, because the chapter select bizarrely treats it as if day 2 and day 3 are one continuous day, when they are not. Add two to these numbers to match those in the chapter select.)
Kazuma: âNo indicationâŚ? NOTHING to suggest fabrication?!â
Ugh, Kazumaâs so worked up at the fact that Mikotoba didnât immediately go âyeah it was totally susâ. Of course he wasnât going to say that! If the fabrication was that obviously apparent, he would have said something ten years ago, Kazuma!
Iâm sure nobody in the judiciary watching this is feeling at all suspicious of the fact that the judge starts chuckling evilly at this. Stronghart, please.
Stronghart: âYou claim the inspector confessed just before his death. But that⌠THAT is the fabrication!â Kazuma: âNo! He freely acknowledged it! I swear he did!â Stronghart: âFreely? With the tip of a sword at his throat? The man was clearly at his witsâ end.â Kazuma: ââŚ!â Stronghart: âThe court will give no credence to this âconfessionâ that was uttered in obvious desperation.â
Whoops. Kazuma is beginning to see just how unhelpful of a plan threatening Gregson was. Stronghart isnât even trying to argue that Kazuma could be making up what he heard, but simply that Gregsonâs confession means nothing when it was given under threat. If Kazuma hadnât been so desperate as to resort to threats, maybe heâd have more of a leg to stand on here!
For the record, I highly doubt that Gregson only confessed because he was desperate and at his witsâ end at all. Based on his demeanour that we see in the flashback, he seemed barely bothered by Kazumaâs threats â perhaps he would have told Kazuma just as much even if a sword hadnât been pointed at him. But of course, because the court doesnât have an actual flashback and only has Kazumaâs word on what happened, itâs very easy for those in the courtroom to imagine that Gregson might have been only confessing out of fear and desperation, simply telling Kazuma what he clearly wanted to hear.
Ryunosuke: âI have the right to cross-examine every witness after testimony. And I fully intend to exercise that right!â Kazuma: âRyunosukeâŚâ
Kazuma is so glad that his friend is this determined. Stronghart was about to declare things closed without a cross-examination, but no, Ryunosuke is going to probe into this further, as much as he possibly can, and Kazuma is so, so thankful for that. He really wouldnât be able to do any of this without Ryunosuke here.
Ryunosuke: âYou, you couldnât say?â Mikotoba: âNo, sadly not.â Kazuma: âBut then you couldnât say there wasnât any indication either, could you?â Mikotoba: ââŚâŚâŚ No, true, I couldnât.â
Kazumaâs comment comes across as so desperate⌠but really, itâs exactly what Mikotoba was trying to hint at and hoping to have the opportunity to point out! Mikotoba was strictly ordered to avoid any supposition, but thanks to Kazumaâs insistence, weâre able to establish that Mikotoba wasnât watching the entire procedure and that fabrication was possible!
Stronghart:Â âGenshin Asogi confessed to all of his crimes upon his arrest. He admitted to having taken the lives of all five members of the aristocracy.â Kazuma:Â âArgh!â
Kazuma does not enjoy being reminded that his father confessed to all the murders. Why on earth would he have done that? His father wouldnât lie!
(I have no doubt that Kazumaâs particular insistence on never telling a direct lie comes from principles he learned from his father.)
Gorey: ââŚbut they did find an amazing piece of evidence. Something unbelievable!â [âŚ] Kazuma: âCome on, Dr Gorey! What was it?â
Itâs kind of interesting how Kazuma has to desperately demand this piece of information from Maria, because itâs not in the autopsy report. The report we read in the Court Record only states that âvital evidenceâ was found in the victimâs stomach, and not what it was. No doubt this vagueness was on purpose of Wilson, so that it would be impossible for anyone reading the autopsy report alone to notice what was contradictory about the evidence, if they didnât know it was a really pointy ring that should have left abrasions on the throat.
Kazuma: âM-My fatherâs ring⌠was inside the victimâs stomach?â
Kazuma reacts in shock to this, perhaps at the fact that this really does seem to indicate the killer must have been his father. Not only does the autopsy report not state specifically what kind of object the vital evidence was, it doesnât even explain why it implicated Genshin ��� that it was one of his belongings. Hearing this here, without any time to think through the details and find the contradiction, it must feel to Kazuma like maybe his father really did do it.
Or, perhaps, heâs simply having a visceral reaction to the fact that one of his fatherâs precious possessions that he remembers from sixteen years ago was found in such a grisly place.
Mikotoba: âIt wasnât on his hand, of course. Moreover⌠there were deep abrasions on his finger where it had been pulled off.â Van Zieks: âŚâŚâŚ Mikotoba: ââŚThey arrested the man there and then, right before my eyes.â Kazuma: âHow could they?!â
Oh, Kazuma. Itâs really pretty apparent why they would arrest Genshin, under those circumstances! But heâs just having an instinctive reaction to the image of his father being handcuffed and arrested that Mikotobaâs account has conjured into his head. Guhh, this poor kid who adored his father more than anything. How could they do anything bad to him, how dare they.
Van Zieksâs pointed silence here is also interesting. Perhaps itâs there to imply that heâs beginning to consider the possibility of how Genshinâs ring was really pulled off his finger, if things were in fact a fabrication.
Stronghart:Â âAfter further investigations by Scotland Yard, the man admitted to his crimes.â Kazuma:Â âThatâs a lie! My father was no killer! Barok van Zieks! It was you! You twisted the truth to suit your purposes!â
Hhhh, Kazuma. This bit comes from pressing van Zieksâs one statement in this testimony, but even then, it comes across as pretty uncalled-for that Kazuma goes from hearing again that his father confessed, right into blaming it all on van Zieks, which is several steps away from the point right now. Kazuma just cannot remotely wrap his head around how or why his father would ever have ended up confessing (it canât be that he actually did it â but he wouldnât lie, either), so in his inability to resolve that, his mind just reflexively defaults to the usual no itâs all van Zieksâs fault, it has to be.
(Itâs fun how Kazuma is fanatically blaming van Zieks as a deflection from the idea that his father might have been the killer. A very similar kind of deflection is also the reason that van Zieks so furiously latched onto blaming Genshin for his brotherâs death, so that he didnât have to consider the far worse alternate possibility.)
I would say itâs notable that Kazumaâs still very much thinking that itâs van Zieks even though itâs now been suggested that it might actually be Stronghart and a part of him earlier seemed to be recognising the logic of that possibility⌠but then, this particular thought process of his definitely has absolutely zero logic involved.
Props to Maria for insisting on bringing the ring here so that we can see just how pointy it is, despite that she apparently wasnât supposed to! She is a good, wanting to do better than her mother did.
Ryunosuke: âThat the ring was never in the victimâs stomach to begin with! Itâs entirely feasible that Dr Wilson fabricated that detail about the autopsy!â Kazuma: âWhat are you saying?! That Dr WilsonâŚâ
Itâs remarkable that Kazuma reacts with surprise here. Youâd think, being more desperate than anybody else for the autopsy to have been fabricated, that heâd have already been imagining that Dr Wilson did just that with the ring, and so Ryunosuke asserting as much shouldnât be surprising to him. But instead, it seems like heâs somehow one step behind Ryunosuke. Perhaps he still is caught up on the notion that his father confessed for some reason and the ring was in the victimâs stomach, and these things are making him subconsciously fear that maybe it was all true, such that he isnât thinking along the lines of how to prove the fabrication like Ryunosuke is.
Ryunosuke: âThis evidence⌠right here.â Kazuma: âThatâs the autopsy report!â
Again, Kazuma seems one step behind Ryunosuke â like it never occurred to him to think about how he could possibly prove that the ring wasnât actually swallowed by Klint.
Mikotoba:Â âThatâs precisely why I had my doubts about the findings myself ten years ago.â Kazuma:Â âThen why didnât you say something at the time?!â
Oh, Kazuma. Why didnât Mikotoba, his trusted guardian, stop his father being killed if he had the opportunity to do so after all? Of course he would have tried, Kazuma. Genshin was his friend.
Wilson: âDoctor Mikotoba, may I remind you⌠that I have vastly more experience than you.â Mikotoba: âIâm, Iâm terribly sorry.â Wilson: âI can think of plenty of ways to explain why no injuries would be seen.â
Nonetheless, itâs still tragic that Mikotoba didnât try harder to protest what he knew was suspicious. He could have challenged Wilson to explain those supposed ways it wouldnât have left an injury! He could even have presented it not as a challenge, but just as an âIâd like to learn more from your expertiseâ kind of thing! But alas, that Japanese politeness, and perhaps Mikotoba just being kind of meek in personality, led to him lying down and accepting it even though he knew something was off.
(Genshin, meanwhile, was a determined and stubborn enough person that heâd absolutely have questioned this further if heâd been in Mikotobaâs shoes. But then, Genshin being someone who didnât bow to his superior telling him âshut up, youâre wrong, I know better than youâ when things were suspicious is exactly why he ended up confronting Klint himself and sealing his own fate.)
Kazuma:Â âSo I was right! Dr Wilson deliberately fabricated the results of the autopsy to implicate my father!â
Oh, Kazuma. Despite being one step behind Ryunosuke just now, as soon as he understands what theyâre getting at, of course heâs the first one to jump to insisting that this proves his father was framed.
Van Zieks: ââŚof Genshin Asogi saving my life.â Kazuma: âWhat?! My, my father⌠saved YOUR life?â
Aaa, of course Kazuma canât believe the notion that his father would do that. Van Zieks is the monster who would go on to kill him! His father saving such a man is backwards!
Or perhaps, the fact that his father apparently considered van Zieks someone worth protecting suggests to Kazuma that maybe heâs not a monster after all, which goes against everything heâs trying to cling to.
Van Zieks proposes the possibility that the thugs who attacked him that night were actually out to steal Genshinâs ring in order to frame him, andâŚ
Kazuma: âObjection!â [he slams his bench in anguish] Kazuma: âYou⌠you pathetic coward⌠You expect me to believe that you werenât involved?â
On some level here, Kazuma must be beginning to accept that van Zieks canât have been. If this really was the one chance the conspirators had to frame Genshin by stealing his ring, and it was done through an apparent attack on van Zieks⌠of course van Zieks himself wouldnât have been in on that. And itâs clear from the van Zieks here right now that he genuinely only just realised the significance himself. Heâs not making this up. Itâs not him, and it never was.
But⌠Kazuma doesnât know how to deal with that realisation. Heâs been clinging to his hatred of van Zieks for so, so long as the only thing keeping him going throughout his grief. What on earth is he supposed to do with all this pain if he canât hate the man any more?
Kazuma:Â âIt was you, wasnât it? Youâre the one who took it. You stole my fatherâs ring!â
Heâs saying this, but thereâs none of the fierce conviction and vitriol that thereâs always been before now. He just looks lost and desperate, and pleading. It has to be van Zieks, doesnât it? He needs it to still be van Zieks.
Kazuma:Â âYou set the whole thing up so you could paint him as a mass murderer and have him arrestââ
Kazuma does a finger-point animation here, but something about the way itâs framed â perhaps something to do with the subtle screen flashes and shakes that there always are (or a lack thereof) â makes it feel like thereâs absolutely no force in it this time. Heâs just emptily going through the motions, not truly believing in it any more, but he doesnât know what to do if this isnât the truth.
Ryunosuke: âObjection! Kazuma⌠open your eyes.â Kazuma: âR-Ryunosuke?â Ryunosuke: âYou must know deep down⌠The truth can be completely obscured even when your judgement is only slightly clouded. But at the moment⌠you seem to be floundering through a dense fog.â Kazuma: ââŚ!â
Ryunosuke has of course known all along that Kazumaâs emotions have been clouding his judgement. (Well, to some extent, though he never quite picked up on just how twisted some of his earlier arguments were.) But it looks like heâs able to see here, based on Kazumaâs demeanour, that he might finally be receptive to being told this! Kazuma very much doesnât seem to truly believe itâs van Zieks any more, so this is the perfect time for Ryunosuke to reach out to him and try to help him see just how misguided heâs being.
Kazumaâs reaction certainly suggests that heâs listening. From anyone else, he might not have â but this is Ryunosuke, the friend he trusts more than anyone.
Ryunosuke: âIs that why you were so insistent I should be present in this trial? To see you like this?â Kazuma: ââŚâŚâŚâ
I strongly suspect that the a lot of the real reason Kazuma insisted on Ryunosuke being here was, on a very not-consciously-acknowledged level, precisely for what heâs doing right now! A part of him always knew that he might have been wrong about van Zieks, and in that event, that buried part of him trusted Ryunosuke to be able to see that and prove van Zieksâs innocence to him â to pull Kazuma off this path of vengeance before it was too late. I like to think that Kazumaâs silence here is him finally letting himself consciously acknowledge that this is what he wanted Ryunosuke here to do.
Meanwhile, Stronghart is chuckling evilly, because Kazumaâs obvious over-emotional desperation is making it very easy to argue that he just made the whole fabrication thing up and missed the obvious âcontradictionâ in it. Said contradiction being: that Genshin didnât try to contest the fabrication in court and confessed to the crimes willingly.
Stronghart:Â âYour twisted loyalty and clouded judgement are hampering your ability for logical thought.â Kazuma:Â âArgh!â
Interestingly, this is the part that Kazuma reacts to most strongly â not the reminder that his father quietly accepted the verdict, but the notion that his emotions have been hindering him. Kazuma really does care in principle about being fair and diligent and logical in his approach to cases, and thanks to Ryunosukeâs words, heâs realising just how horribly far from that heâs been in this trial.
Stronghart:Â âThere was no fabrication of evidence during the autopsy of his final victim ten years ago!â Ryunosuke:Â âAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!â
And itâs Ryunosuke, not Kazuma, who reacts violently to Stronghart shooting down their argument. He ends up with his head in his hands, despairing, but KazumaâŚ
Kazuma: âObjection! Thank you, Ryunosuke. If it wasnât for your frank words just now⌠this trial may very well have ended prematurely.â
Heâs managed to figure something out, all thanks to Ryunosuke talking him down from his emotions and making him realise he needs to look at things more objectively! They are friends.
I also love how quickly Kazumaâs able to turn himself around like this. There really was always a buried part of him that suspected he was wrong about van Zieks and wanted to do this better, and all it took was his friend talking some sense into him for him to be able to push aside his emotions and act on that more logical side of himself, like he always should have been.
Kazuma:Â âYou claim that my fatherâs silence was due to the fact that there was no fabricated evidence. But thereâs another possible explanation. Youâve overlooked the possibility that he had a reason for maintaining that silence!â
This is not a line of logic Kazuma would have been able to think through if heâd still been letting his emotions drive him. He truly believes in his father as a paragon of justice and integrity who would never lie, and never engage in any kind of underhanded deals. From that perspective, the question of why his father would ever confess to crimes he didnât commit just makes his mind short circuit and think about something else.
But if Kazuma approaches this logically, unemotionally, just thinking about why somebody in that position might give a false confession⌠there is actually a possible reason that he can argue for here. He still doesnât like to believe that his father would do such a thing, but heâs putting that emotional thought aside for now to focus on the facts.
Van Zieks:Â âIf the autopsy results were an invention, thereâs no conceivable reason why the man wouldnât have protested!â Kazuma:Â âObjection! Oh, those results were an invention alright. Thereâs no question of that. Or are you forgetting that two people with a connection to that autopsy have been assassinated?â
And look at him being so confident about this! Up until just now, Kazuma was floundering every time Stronghart tried to insist that the fabrication wasnât real â but now that heâs got his head on straight, heâs able to find the perfect argument as to why it has to have been real. Not one thatâs based on his emotional belief in his fatherâs innocence, but one based on objective facts that he can cite. Look at him go! Heâs actually good at this after all!
Kazuma: âIf I force the grievances I feel from my mind⌠I start to see you in a very different light. I think perhaps itâs you whoâs been living in delusion these ten years.â
Look at him empathising with van Zieks! Heâs seeing him as a person whoâs suffered and had his view of the truth twisted by grief and hatred and denial just like Kazuma has! It really is remarkable how quickly Kazuma was able to turn around and realise this â which just goes to show that there was always a part of him capable of seeing that van Zieks is in fact a human being. Itâs just that heâs finally listening to that part of him now, instead of fervently shutting it away.
(Although, really, Kazuma, itâs both of you whoâve been deluded in one way or another for ten years. Acting like itâs only van Zieks and not you after all sure is some projecting.)
Van Zieks: âM⌠MeâŚ?â
Oh no, van Zieks, heâs so defensive about this â but of course, thereâs always been a buried part of him deep down that suspected it wasnât actually Genshin, and if it wasnât Genshin, then it must have beenâ
Ryunosuke: ââŚit led to his escape. An escape that was only possible because heâd been sentenced to death.â Kazuma: âAlthough I find it hard to believe my father would have negotiated in that way⌠the defence is correct.â
Aww, Kazuma. He still does believe in his father and at least wants to mention that fact⌠but heâs no longer letting it stop him from following the logic of what evidently happened.
Kazuma:Â âThe prosecution wishes to summon new witnesses to the stand!â Stronghart:Â âWitnesses?â Kazuma:Â âPeople who can testify about the jailbreak that took place ten years ago.â Ryunosuke:Â âAh!â
And look at Ryunosuke being surprised â heâs the one whoâs one step behind now! Kazuma had already thought all of this through and realised that he was going to have to call these witnesses, probably as soon as he objected earlier. He really is on top of things, finally!
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