#JON IM SO SORRY I WOULD NEVer
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hellogoodbyeitsme · 3 months ago
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[Damian in the Minecraft server excitedly showing Jon his extensive (and ethical) farms that he made while Jon was banned from Minecraft to focus on studying for tests at school]
Jon: ... yeah, you're so shit at Minecraft. Looks nice though!
Damian: ?! what do you mean? I worked hard on these????
Jon: *sigh* I'll show you what a real Minecraft farm looks like!
[Jon brings him to his "farm" and proudly shows off the fact you cannot tell the pixels apart as there are so many animals in one spot]
Damian: I....... have no words for this. Our friendship is about to end over this. Think of their feelings.
Jon: but this is how you play Minecraft 😭😭 next you're going to tell me you don't even eat the animals at your farm and they're just decorative 😭
Damian: I'M A VEGETARIAN. 😡😡😡😡 I MAKE BREAD. 😡😡😡😡😡😡 LOG BACK OUT. 😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡
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throwawayasoiafaccount · 5 months ago
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if westeros was created to reflect our modern society instead of being loosely based off of western medieval society, then i think people would understand that these political marriages are for alliances, not love, and would agree that the modern lower class sentiments towards marriage are simply not applicable to these arrangements and both bride and groom cannot and should not expect love from their partner.
if our story occurred in a modern westeros very similar to our own modern society, then a lot of the obstacles our characters face would not happen because, simply put, modern society benefits from equality.
as an example, i am quite (100%) certain that the introduction of gender equality and other modern values and advancements to westeros would only be beneficial to rhaegar and elia, which means that this ideology benefits westerosi society on an individual level.
so, in this modern westeros au, if rhaegar and elia still married for a political alliance, and then had two children like they did in asoiaf, they could then peacefully divorce and write out a contract that secures both rhaenys and aegons inheritances. if lyanna and rhaegar met and fell in love while rhaegar and elia were married then the misunderstanding that sparked a war would never have happened. why? because lyanna would have a say in who she marries in this modern au. also, elia would have possibly been seeing others as well. why? because this was a political marriage and love shouldn’t be expected, so why would anyone be concerned about either party finding love outside of their marriage? plus modern westeros would have dna testing so there’s no reason to question the paternity of their children.
also, if elia had a child with someone else (in this hypothetical scenario, perhaps her lover died) and rhaegar decided to claim that child as his own while knowing that he’s not the real father in order to give this child a better life, then this wouldn’t be a problem either. why? because rhaegar’s in the know. (i’m only bringing this up bc of the rhaenyra and laenor situation. guys… laenor is perfectly aware that biologically those kids aren’t his, yet he still claimed them and loved them bc he and rhaenyra had an agreement. i do not understand why real ppl are even concerned about jace, luke, and joffs parentage. in the eyes of the law those boys are legally laenors.)
however, since asoiaf isn’t based off of our modern society and is instead a society riddled with misogyny, xenophobia and other social issues without the progress and advancements that we in the 21st century have benefited from, i will concede one thing to these antis who harp on and on about how selfish rhaenyra and rhaegar were for loving someone who wasn’t their spouse and for having a child(ren) out of wedlock.
because yes, rhaegar and lyanna’s love can be considered an act of selfishness, and rhaenyra loving harwin and having children with him can also be considered selfish.
but guess what? love in general is a very selfish state of being. you are prioritizing your partner and your desires over everything and everyone else in your life.
one of the greatest love stories of all time, romeo and juliet, is a tale of two selfish lovers who seek to be together despite the immense hatred between their families. selfless and dutiful children would never love an enemy. and yet, despite romeo and juliet’s love story ending in tragedy, no one would ever argue that these two lovers were in the wrong for simply trying to be together even though their love caused their families great grief. why? because the feud between the Montagues and the Capulets was stupid. and the story ends with the characters agreeing that this feud went on for long enough and acknowledging the fact that this petty feud between the families was the cause of their misery and the tragedy that befell them.
though the circumstances of all three love stories are different, it’s undeniable that these lovers were selfish for prioritizing their own desires over their duties to their houses.
to end this little spiel, i’d like to mention that the reason i first brought up a modern au was to remind people that the only reason rhaelya and rhaenyra’s relationship with harwin can be so decisively called selfish is because these characters live in westeros. and westeros is a fucked up society rooted in systematic oppression, violence, and abuse and other forms of exploitation in order to further the agenda of the powerful despite the harm it causes. any modern comforts and progressive ideas hinder the control the patriarchs have over their families and put a name to the bigotry expressed against these unconventional relationships. so yes, their love is selfish because being unconventional in such a backwards society is a recipe for disaster, especially since both of these relationships hinge on a woman deciding to take control of her sexual autonomy, which is a big no no in westeros since a woman’s body only belongs to her father and husband. so yes, these love stories are selfish because these characters are prioritizing themselves in a society that benefits from them losing their autonomy and harms them and their loved ones when they try to take back their autonomy.
to finish off, the reason i brought up the tragic love story of romeo and juliet is to remind people that even though rhaegar and lyanna’s love was selfish, other characters still need to be held accountable for their actions that helped to escalate this misunderstanding into a tragedy that consumed all of westeros.
#the only reason any of this shit happened is bc westeros is a fucked up place#their love may be selfish but it’s also commendable#we’re only human~ and we were built for love~#i think some of the rhaegar hate stems from the fact that he can openly love another woman but elia would be scorned for doing the same#but this isn’t rhaegar’s fault. their society just failed them. which sucks#the bodies of nobles in westeros never truly belong to themselves. which is insane. the king belongs to his ppl. a wife to her husband#a son to his father. a daughters body belongs to her father. the common folk belong to the nobles… ughhh#westeros is truly a society built on controlling the autonomy of others in order to gain power/benefits#sorry if all this doesn’t make any sense lol#i haven’t read romeo and juliet recently and just brushed up on it through wiki so im sry if i got something wrong lol#jon snow belonging to the nights watch and getting killed for daring to try to leave to save someone he loves…#hdsjhddhd#nedcat you’ll always be the exception ❤️#political marriages = big business deal#<- nedcat isn’t the exception here tho#me: progressive ideas would be beneficial to the individuals! also me: no shit sherlock#westerosi society escalated a misunderstanding to a tragedy#alicent and robert are arms of the patriarchy#tywin and viserys benefitting from the devestation they caused until they’re dead and the house of cards falls apart#asoiaf#rhaegar targaryen#lyanna stark#pro rhaenyra targaryen#rhaenyra targaryen#harwin strong#laenor velaryon#anti alicent hightower#anti alicent stans#anti elia stans#someone once tried to argue about modern au stuff about westeros to me and it just got me thinking lolo
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grave-farewell · 10 months ago
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#im bitching in the tags abt the nostalgic nintendo yter sue me. sorry if this is how you learn. its rambling at this point.#yes this is about chuggaaconroy. man u fucked up big time!! IT'S CHUGGAACONCLUDED FOR YOU MAN.#tfw ur comfort youtuber you've been watching since you were a 12 year old has a mountain of allegations +#+ proven testimonies about him being a freak w women online and making them VERY uncomfortable w kink rp and disrespecting boundaries#i started watching him during super mario sunshine and had been a fan since. he inspired me recently to pick up BW/B2W2 on DS again.#the motherfucker that got me into game series i would have had no interest in if shown it at face value (xenoblade!! ily!!!!)#i took emily's stuff at as it was given and wanted to wait for more to come out bc she said there were others. then the 2 vtubers came out.#then Masae. She has nothing to lie about with him. She + Antdude + Werster + NCS + Jon have NOTHING to gain from talking about this.#she was his roommate!! and his current roommate NintendoCapriSun is confirming that this all happened!!#CHUGGA GOT CAUGHT IN 4K TOO. he flirted w her during a dnd campaign + the stephenvlogs videos with her in them she looks SO uncomfortable.#i feel so bad for all the artists + fan artists for his most recent LP too. they 100% do not want to be associated with THAT i guarantee.#but ya no longer a fan. hope everyone around him can get proper help + support. TLDR never have idols. you will always be disappointed.
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butcharyastark · 10 months ago
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game of thrones wouldve had an ending that was much more free of blood and mass death if jon snow was even just a smidgen less of a boyfailure that cant resist women who are mean to him. in this essay i will
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dockaspbrak · 1 year ago
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ah man so THATS why i like movies with the theme "just bc its doomed doesnt mean its worthless"
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wammbam · 1 year ago
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i feel as tho
i might barf
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afro-hispwriter · 5 months ago
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Interview Shenanigans(TGC)
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Tom Glynn-Carney x actress!reader
Request
Warnings- not edited, brief titty grabbing
wc-1.2k
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Staff members were running around making sure lighting, sound, and cameras were ready. The interviewer was standing off to the side, waiting for their queue. 
Your makeup artist did some more touch ups and the show's publicist gave another talk. 
“You’re so far.” Tom put his hand under your chair and dragged it so your chairs touched. The sudden movement made you grab his shoulder so you didn’t fall. 
“Do you not get enough of me at home?” You whisper.
“I never can.” He flashed you a smile and squeezed your knee. You scrunched your nose at him and kissed his cheek. 
It was so hard for you two to keep your relationship away from the public. Especially since Tom is extremely touchy.
“Everyone take their places.” The producer calls out and everyone takes their seats. The interviewer walked into the small space and shook you and Tom's hand. The producer then started counting down from five. 
“Alright guys, we're going to jump right into it. I know you have had a long day so I have some fun questions and some would you rather.” 
“I'm excited.”
“Fun.”
“You guys have been working together for a couple years now. What's the best thing about each other?” They ask and you and Tom look at each other.
“Ooo that's such a sweet question.” You smile brightly and look at Tom. “Why don’t you go first?” You look at him with squinted eyes and he gives you the same look.
“Fine. I think the best thing about Y/n is how kind she is, she is very resilient and always tries to see the bright side of things and she’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.” 
“Awww.” You cooed and smiled. “You’re so sweet.” 
“And she is a good cook.” You doubled over slightly and laughed. 
“I know you love it.” You leaned back against your chair and Tom looked at you lovingly and you sighed. 
“Tom, he um.” You start and pause to think.
“Oh whatever should you say since there is so much to choose from.” He says over exaggerating his words making you laugh.
“Tom, he makes sure that I am seen and even if he has nothing to say he still listens, always. I believe we all need someone like that and I am glad I found him.” You grab Tom's knee and squeeze it. 
“Do you fancy me or something?” He says jokingly, making you laugh again and so does the interviewer. 
“He’s just such a good guy and I hope this isn’t the last time we share a screen together.” Tom nodded and lifted his fist up and you gave him a fist bump. 
“That is so sweet, I can feel your chemistry right now.” It was very cheesy for them to say but it made Tom's cheeks burn red and your face warmed. “Now to some would you rather questions. Would you rather go get a pint with Daemon, Joffrey, or Aemond?” 
“Aemond.” You immediately say and Tom’s head immediately shoots to you. 
“Why?” You smirk at him.
“You know why.” He playfully rolled his eyes and leaned back. 
“I would go with Joffrey.” Your eyes widened in shock. 
“And you questioned mine!?” 
“W-Why?” The interviewer asks and Tom goes to answer but stops making you laugh.
“You don’t have to say anything.” You whisper to him
“Well with Joffrey people would leave the pub and it would be quiet.”
“Yeah but I think with Joffery, three pints in and it can get a bit.” The interviewer grimaced. 
“Yeah, I wouldn’t want to be near him.” You leaned slightly into Tom. 
“I reckon I can take him though.” Tom says.
“Tom vs Joffrey?” 
“Yeah I’ll just choke him out.” Tom makes the choking motion with his arm and then he dropped them. 
“I'd pay to see that.” You say and Tom laughs and his arm makes its way around your chair. 
“Who would you rather have as your Ride or Die? Jon Snow, Khalessi, or Daemon.”
“Khalessi.” You say immediately again. “Everyone is gone when she is an option.” 
“Your obsession with her is concerning.”
“You can’t blame me.” 
“She is very loyal so I understand.” The interviewer says.
“Im sorry whats a ride or die?” Tom asks, looking between you and the interviewer. 
“It's like me and you.” You say and he still looked at you in confusion. “Like I will do anything for you and you’ll do anything for me no matter what.” You grabbed his knee and you nodded. 
“What were the options?” Tom chuckles.
“Jon Snow, Khalessi, or Daemon.” 
“Oh probably Khalessi then, you know she’s got all the dragons.” 
“Ugh you are so predictable.” You rolled your eyes and he shrugged. 
“I love whatever you love.” He poked your side and made you twist. 
“You’re so cheesy.” You rolled your eyes playfully and looked back at the interviewer.
“Would you rather rule the seven kingdoms of Westeros or be a minister of magic in the wizarding world?”
“Oooo.” Tom lets out.
“Minister of Magic.” You say and Tom nods.
“Likewise.”
“I feel like I would have a higher chance of surviving if I was in that universe.” You say and Toms fingers dipped into the material of your open backed outfit. 
“Well it's still not an easy gig is it?”
“But compared to westeros…” 
“True. There are still a lot of eyes on you.” Then Tom says the stupidest thing. “Wingardium Tapioca or whatever it is.” Your jaw slacked in shock and then your face palmed. Tom looked embarrassed and slapped his legs and started laughing loudly. 
“Oh my gosh Tom.” He grabbed his cup of water and took a sip. 
“I'm going to go cry in the shower after this.”
“Next time we hang out we’re watching all the Harry Potter movies because that was really bad. It's Wingardium Leviosa.” 
“Nerd.” Tom says under his breath in a teasing manner and you squint your eyes.
“Watch yourself sir.” You bumped him with your arm.
“Yes ma’am.” 
“Unfortunately that's all the time we have left.” You and Tom groaned but you secretly knew you were happy it was over. You both held your hand out to the interviewer and Tom's assistant came up.
“The car is outside to take you back to the hotel.” You thanked them and Tom held his hand out for you to grab. Your fingers entwined together and you swung them back and forth to the car. 
-
The hotel room was a welcome sight. Tom threw his hat on the floor and kicked his shoes off. 
“They’ll come by and get these clothes tomorrow most likely.” You say taking off your bottoms, leaving you in your underwear and top. That came off too and so did your bra. Tom stole a look and he smirked and let you put a shirt on. You flopped down on the bed and settled under the covers. Tom was down to his boxers and he settled in behind you. 
“I love you.” He says and kisses the back of your ear and wraps an arm around your waist.
“I love you too.” You twist your head back and pucker your lips. Tom’s lips met yours and he squeezed you. His hand dipped under the shirt and his gingers instantly grabbed a breast and he squeezed. The noise you made was a mix of shock and a moan.
“Tom!” You pinched his arm and he drew his hand back and pouted. “Perv.”
“You love it.” He gave your cheek a big wet kiss, making you grimace and wipe it off.
“Order us some food.”
‘Hmph’
-
Comments, reblogs, and likes are greatly appreciated!
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dipperscavern · 4 months ago
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post resurrection jon snow fucks MEAN. mean in a rough and dirty way. he fucks you against the wall and bend you on his desk and force himself in your cunt. and it hurts so good the stretch of his cock, his big and calloused hands grabbing your body. he eats you out like it is his last meal (and it certainly could be) messy, he spits and slurps and suffocates himself in your smell and arousal.
a cold hand on your neck, holds in you in place, with your knees almost on your face. folded in half, and in this position you realize how big he is. big shoulders and strong arms, legs that support his weight and fucks you dumb. he grunts and stares with his lips parted, a frown on his brows, eyes going from his cock splitting you open and your sweaty face distorted pleasure. when you close your eyes, he mutters a don’t stop watching pretty girl and force your face to watch yourself cream his cock.
the scars con his chest are a reminder of a pain. he is still jon, sweet and caring jon. empathetic and strong jon. he is a leader, a good leader and a great warrior. he loves and shows his love more than ever. but a part of him died, and it would never be the same. he can fuck you tender and loving, but most of the times he fucks on you the present fear on the back of his mind that it might be the last time.
THE SPECIFICATION OF THE COLD HAND ILY ILY ILY. this just.. perfectly summed up my thoughts in one. he’s so frustrated and feels weird and is so pent up in a way he doesn’t know how to release. and then he’s locking the door & kissing your neck.
“Need you. Now.”
and you quickly nod, wanting to feel him. wanting to give him anything he wants for the rest of his life.
“Tell me ‘f it’s too much.”
u said “big shoulders and strong arms” and i began to salivate. GOD THIS IS SO ACCURATE. HE DOES FUCK YOU DUMB. and he grabs your jaw, forcing you to look at where his cock disappears inside your cunt…. AND THE NICKNAME!! NGH~!! i am so sorry.
at this point just take over my blog cause you summed this up perfectly. THIS is mean jon snow. has you crying & shaking & whining about how much it is and how full you are… tee hee
edit: (CHECK THE TAGS PLS IM CRYING. THIS ANON HAS BEEN NAMEd)
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killishin · 8 months ago
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JEALOUS
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pairing : damian x reader
warning : some jealousy
category : fluff
author's note : okay my exams are over ( for now ) and im writing after like a year so if there's any mistakes , forgive me. Also first time writing damian , or any dc chara so sorry if there's anything wrong. enjoy :)
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parties , gathering were never your place and neither his. the league had decided to have a gathering of all heroes and as much as you would rather be in your room sleeping , there's free food here.
that's the reason you tell everyone.
If you were being honest , you still weren't gonna come but a certain recent argument with Damian , your oh so understanding boyfriend , had you in a mood of mischief. You wanted to do something to annoy him , as childish as it sounds for someone who has the status of hero , you just had to.
Initially both of you had decided not to go but then just today morning you told him you were going. you laugh when you remember the disbelief that was on his face.
" Fine. Go. " was all he said back then and you thought that would be it. He would be sulking away in his own solitude.
But he came , with that same brooding face which for a moment melted away when he met your eyes , when he saw you looking absolutely gorgeous , but it was quickly replaced by a scowl when he saw you smirking.
You knew how much he hated crowds so having him go through one was utmost peak revenge.
( he has a huge soft spot for you but he wasn't gonna concede so easily. )
He saw you the whole night talking away , laughing with your friends and the strangers that approached you. He saw how everyone hung onto every word you said and get lost in the spark in your eyes , just like he did.
" Trouble in paradise?" Jon said and smirked when Damian ignored him. Jon saw how he was glaring daggers on the people talking to you.
It was simply comical to him how big of a hold you have on Damian. So he decided to just tease. just a little.
" Oh boy did you see the way the guy laughed?? He's totally trying on her. Is it just me or is he inching towards her?? Man you gotta do something or he'll take awa-"
And that was enough to set off Damian as put down his glass on the bar and went striding off to where you were , leaving Jon smirking wide.
You were enjoying your conversation with the new people you met , but you can't lie it was getting tiring now. Your social battery was running out and maybe right now all you need is a quiet corner and him. Just the bliss of his presence.
And thankfully, you were rescued.
Damian came right in the middle of the conversation, put his hand on your lower back gently before looking at everyone else with his usual glare, although you swear you could see the anger in his eyes.
" I apologise but we need to be somewhere. " He said and started directing you away from the crowd but he stopped in between and glanced back at the guy who was hitting on you.
" Back off , 's all I'll say." His voice held a warning that only an idiot would miss and your eyes slightly widened at his outburst.
But when your eyes met with Jon who was reeling from the scenario , you joined the dots.
( OH JACKPOT )
Damian directed you in a quiet corner outside , away from prying eyes and voices. He let go of you and looked off in a distance , his brows furrowed and his upset eyes looking anywhere else but you.
maybe this was too much.
You realised in your childishness you may have actually upset your man.
You gently pulled him by his arm and made him look at you. It was like a little angry puppy looking at you and you could just die from the cuteness aggression.
" Are you mad at me?" you asked with a small smile. He scoffed and looked away again.
" No why would i be?"
" Cause you were jealous."
" I was not. "
" I never took you for the jealous type you know."
" I said i was not jealous."
You laughed and gently held his face in your hands. aww now he really looks like a puppy.
" I'm sorry if i upset you. It wasn't my intention to make you jealous."
" But it was your intention to come to the party."
" That. "
You laughed guiltily and wrapped your arms around his neck.
" Okay yeah obviously that was my intention. But you weren't talking to me at all during missions , and it just made me a bit.... annoyed. So i had to do something to make you talk." you justified, knowing you could have just maturely had a conversation with him about the argument in private.
" ....And annoy you."
you looked down in guilt but then you heard him laughing heartily. You looked up in surprise. The sight not only rare , but it melts you away. It was the most cutest thing ever , the way his face lit up , the way his lips stay in a beautiful smile.
He took a hold of your chin and pulled you close.
" If you wanted attention, "
He kissed your lips slow , his tongue exploring your mouth as his hands went from your chin to your hips , pulling you even more close. You could sense the hint of sass coming as he teased you by gently nibbling on your lower lip. He pulled away , looking at your lips , then your eyes and that shit eating grin on his face.
" You could have just asked. "
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reblogs and likes are appreciated :)
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robinofgothamcity · 9 months ago
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"so i cry and i pray for you to love me, love me, say that you love me."
♡ character: damian wayne x reader
♡ pronouns used: she / her
♡ note: not checked for grammar or spelling mistakes / hiiii ik i haven't updated in a while but like life bro lmao anyway im trying to find a new job bc a bitch needs money so like big girl stuff happening around here anywayyyyyy here is a blurb/drabble thing i kinda made it up on the fly so sorry if it's shitty
your rose gold dress was dragging against the floor as you were going around from league member to league member introducing yourself on the behalf of black canary. the annual JLA gala was one with a bunch of uppity superheroes and their sidekicks trying to get on everyone's good side which did not interest you at all.
your domino mask was not comfortable at all, nevertheless, it clashed with your very expensive dress. you knew dinah would have liked you to make your rounds with everyone but you were not interested in making friends with anyone that you weren't with usually.
you had been looking for jon or jaime but you figured that they must have gotten dragged around the gala by batman or even superman for things they didn't want to do themselves.
as you approached the snack table, you noticed the R patch standing right in front of you. you had yet to met the infamous robin and although you figured that batman was going to need your assistance in the teen titans one day in the not so distant future, you assumed that your first encounter with the boy wonder would be there.
you handed robin the drink he was looking for and smiled, "figured it beat having to reach across the table for it," the boy gave you a smirk, instantly making your face warm up, "(sidekick name) right? canary's righthand woman?" you nodded, "interesting way of meeting each other," you replied.
robin chuckled as you heard jaime finally scream your name frantically from the other side of the room, "sorry for cutting this short, duty calls when your dumbass best friend is calling for you," you stated as you grabbed your dress and darted to where jaime was.
damian swirled his drink around for a moment before grabbing his phone. he knew bruce hated when he was on his phone but he never thought that canary's sidekick was this....cute. damian also knew everyone's name, no thanks to bruce, so he knew it wasn't going to be too difficult to retrieve your information.
damian had found your instagram which was public and immediately scrolled through it. he found what was normal for girls your age. pictures with you and your sorority friends in some and others showed pictures of you and your family.
as damian continued to scroll he noticed the eye twitch he'd get when he saw a photo of you and a guy friend with his hand a bit too tight on your upper thigh. he knew that he didn't have any reason to get even slightly jealous, however; it wasn't a secret that whatever damian liked he eventually got.
he chuckled at the picture he saw of you looking up at dinah as you hugged her with a simple heart as the caption. damian knew that you weren't stupid enough to give off any real connection that you had to dinah but he figured that you must've wanted to appreciate for taking you under her wing.
damian made his way to where you were with jaime, bart, jon, and a few others. you were leaning against the bar, having a beer with jaime and jon as jon was the first to notice him.
"hey robin, fancy seeing you here with the rest of us mere mortals," he joked. it wasn't very common to see damian with the rest of the titans and young justice team. he was usually glued to batman's side as it was his duty to fulfill any questions he had of his own but he figured that since had taken an interest with you, one night like this wouldn't be so bad.
jon followed damian's eye trajectory and chuckled in amusement.
"shooting for the big leauges, huh?" jon asked. damian looked over to him so he could elaborate, "canary's sidekick is a very popular girl to say the least. the media loves her, i can't begin to explain how man lovesick letters i've had to sort through from her fans, and the league themselves love her. plus, i've noticed that a lot of our teammates are very interested in getting to know her, if you get what i'm saying."
damian scoffed, "and i'm damian wayne so lets see how that fairs for everyone else," jon knew damian was as cocky as they came but he knew that his confidence was on another level and what he wanted he usually got whether it meant getting his hands dirty for it or not.
the lights in the roomed had dimmed as he noticed that you were now by yourself with a wine glass between your fingers. damian fixed his tie as jon dusted his best friends shoulders off in encouragement. jon was always ready to support his best friend in anyway that he could even if that meant slightly sabotaging his other friend's chances with you in the process.
you were sipping your red wine as damian approached you cooly, "hey robin! nice seeing you again!" he smiled slightly as he took your cheap wine and set it on the table and handed another one for you to tase, "a red wine from napa, 1909 to be specific," your eyes widened as you took a sip.
"it's slightly bitter but it's pretty good," you replied as you took another drink, "thank you for this, i didn't think i'd be getting any kind of drinks from anyone tonight," you added on.
damian put his shoulder against the wall as he noticed how he practically towered over you, "do you think i could have this dance with you?" he asked as he heard the next song start to play.
you were shocked to say the least.
you knew how hard it was to get on robin's good graces and you had practically done nothing to achieve it. the song was slow and he took your hand softly as he led you to the dance floor.
thankfully, the room was dark enough to where others wouldn't notice that it was him dancing, "thank you for asking me. i didn't think i was interesting enough to get a dance from thee boy wonder tonight," damian laughed, "the pleasure is all mine. i didn't think canary had such an interesting protege,"
"i can't say i'm that interesting, i'm still working my way up the league ladder," you replied. damian scoffed, "it won't take long to make you an official hero," he stated, "with someone of your strength and abilities alone, i can imagine you'll be called up in no time."
you giggled excitedly as damian spun you around and had you face him but closer now, "but before that happens i guess i'll teach you the ropes," he whispered, "and can i ask what that might include?" you asked.
damian lifted your chin and stared at you with his emerald eyes.
"i think i can give you a taste test before the exam approach."
damian was never this straight forward, especially when it came to other league members and their sidekicks but he knew what jon said was correct. it didn't take an idiot to realize how loved you were by everyone and he knew his competition, mainly jaime and connor, could easily win you over so he did the only thing he knew to do in a situation like this, act like his playboy billionaire father as much as he could and from what he could tell, he was on the right track.
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madlittlecriminal · 1 year ago
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OMG I loved the cockwarming blurb 😩 Could i make a request for Scarecrow? Jon is super focused on paperwork in his office at home. Of course it's better to be safe than sorry, but reading over the same documents for a third time is getting to be boring, and it's stressing him out. As a distraction, you start stripping, massaging shoulders, kissing his neck. Anything to get his attention. you end up riding Crane's thigh as a hail mary, which DOES get his attention... 🥴
Pay Attention ↦ Jonathan Crane × Female!Reader
not gonna lie, i got hot thinking about this...lol but thank you! im glad you loved it! :D
Warnings: smut, thigh riding, soft dom!jonathan (i think? he sounded a bit more dom than i actually planned), dirty talk, praise
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Jonathan was officially bored of reading the same document over. He's read it three times already and the words were starting to blur together. "Jonathan?" He heard you ask softly from his office door. "Hmm?" You sighed and rolled your eyes at his response. "Are you okay? You've staring at that document for the past 30 minutes." You tilt your head to the side just to be met with another "hmm." If there was one thing you hated was being ignored. "Are you ignoring me, Jonathan?" He didn't say anything as he played with his pen while reading the document. You took a deep breath and took your shirt off, hoping it would grab his attention.
You were met with his eyes still glued to the paper.
You took off your sweatpants, tilting your head to the side as you got closer to him since he still wasn't looking at you.
You walked up behind him and started massaging his shoulders. He didn't protest as it did release some tension he felt. "Aren't you tired?" He didn't respond as he took a deep breath, enjoying you massaging his shoulders.
You huffed out a breath as he did, so you began kissing his neck, hoping it'll get a reaction out of him, but no. He sat there as if nothing was happening when usually, he'd go insane when you'd kiss his neck. You nodded, removing your hands from his shoulders and undoing your bra and removing your panties.
"Jonathan?"
"Hmm?"
You moved his desk chair lightly before sitting on his thigh. "What are you-" Jonathan quickly stopped talking when he was met with your naked figure on his thigh. "Oh now I have your attention!" He gulped, shaking his head and going back to the paperwork. You slightly grinded on his thigh, causing him to gasp. You were wet, but not as wet as he knew could get. "Baby," your eyes met his and he gave you a smirk. "What are you doing?" You shrug, grinding against his thigh again. "Are you having fun?" You nodded as you bit your lip. He put the document and the pen down, leaning back in his chair watching you grind yourself on his thigh.
"You look so pretty when you do that, you know that don't you darling?" You let out a small giggle, making him bite his lip. "You need help, don't you my needy girl?" You nodded. His lips met yours, kissing you passionately as he rested his hands on your hips. You returned the passion of the kiss, your fingers tangled into his hair.
He guided you to move on his thigh as his hands never left your hips. He broke the kiss, biting his lip as he looked at you with hooded eyes. "God, you're beautiful. Keep going, baby and don't stop until you come on my thigh." You moaned softly, grinding against his thigh a little harder, causing him to groan. He knew you needed more pleasure, so he smirked before he started bouncing his leg, making you gasp. "Oh fuck!" He hummed in pleasure. "That's it, darling. You're such a good girl for me." You moaned as he leaned over and began kissing your neck while he continued to bounce his leg with his hands still on your hips.
You tugged on his hair as you continued to grind on his thigh, moaning his name. Your wetness soaked through his slacks, making him groan at how wet you now were. "Such a good girl for me. I can feel you dripping on my thigh, darling." From his dirty talk, the praising, the vibrations from his leg and his hands on your hips, you couldn't take it anymore. The knot in your stomach snapped, causing you to let go of his hair, gripping the back of the chair as you came on his thigh.
He stopped his leg bounce and looked at you with a smile. "Hey," you snickered at his single word, catching your breath as your head rested on his shoulder. "Hey," he planted a kiss on your forehead after you responded. "Do you think you have energy for another?" He fixed your position before getting up with you in his arms before placing you on the desk. With a nod, you look on the desk and push the paperwork to the side. "Don't wanna ruin the paperwork do we?"
"Fuck the paperwork."
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lokorum · 4 months ago
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what would you say is your favorite jonmichael fic..... im very curious and love to reread anything in that tag
oh but how can i pick only one when they all are so good??? (,,•᷄‎ࡇ•᷅ ,,)?
aaaaaa can i make the several honorable mentions of the fics that made me scream and roll on the floor?????? pretty please???
scheherazade was one of the first jonmichael fics that i found while going through all of the cher's works because, evidently, they have no fics that are not worth reading!! (i'm sorry if and forty feet down only confirming it!!!)
sleep inertia has one of the best dialogues i ever read!!! the way cruelzy writes michael's lines??? aaaaaaaaa its so delicious and believable and never for a second i thought i'm reading something out of canon?? its just that good. 
carousel is the only one fic (from what i found) that i set in the last season and its adds a lot of layers to that big jonmichael onion that torments my eyes for a while now ldkfjgkdfjg also it's messy?? i mean the whole situation in the fic?? its so humanly complicated and it does not gives you the chance to experience any of the feelings clearly and i love it!! screechfox somehow captured all of the complicated stuff in one fic, blendered it together and for the whole time i just couldn't take my eyes away from it. 
five times michael saves jon's life and one time he doesn't have to - is here to sooth our pain and heal our wounds. i reread it so many times!! the dynamic between jon and michael in it is one to live for!!! sometimes you think 5+1 kind of fics can't surprise you anymore and then the coolest author like paisleycowboys enters the room and proves you wrong. 
to be like super honest, the 100 ways to say i love you series, when i first saw it, made me think im not gonna like it? i love my fanfics long and scary and bittersweet and with a bad-very-not-good-endings, so the title of this one made me go "hmmmmm HMMMMM hmmmmm hmmmm?" but ive started to read it anyway, theres not that many fics on the ao3 for jonmichael, we cant afford to be capricious and gosh GOSH i was so fucking wrong!!! its sweet AND sad AND scary AND awkward (in a best way!!!) AND it made me giggle so many times!!! NeedsCaffeineRightNow can make even the edgiest of us enjoy the soft kinds of fics (its not hard when they are written with so much care and love.)
POSSESSIVE!! MICHAEL!! COMBING!!! JON'S!! HAIR!!!!!! what else do we need from life?
transition, every time i reread it or think about it, makes me painfully aware of how many things should coincide for something to work. it's not one of those fics that completely encompass you; nor its the one that leaves you with new headcanons or in a good mood, no, i think it's the one that leaves you in dissoray, making you want to argue with author, to ask them what were they thinking about, pointing on your weak sides like this?, giving you something precious and then stealing it away? pushing your old bruises? that is to say, i have nothing but deep respect for indefensibleselfindulgence. to write fic that makes you want to engage in conversation? thats powerful 
Our 'Angel' of Static and Bone is written so inexplicably good, that more than once i wondered, how NeverwinterThistle was able to do it? and then i realised they are one of my fave bg3 and dishonored authors phpphp but really, the care, the effort that went into this fic? they are literally visible! you can feel the amount of time and brain juice that went into writing it. and the neighbor character? they appeared like two times?? and still their addition left me speechless with how clever it is, how different!! absolutely amazing work.
adjective noun has jonmichael chapter (11) that destroyed me as a person i swear i laughed so hard i dropped my phone and just kept giggling face-into-the-pillow style!!!!!! its rare for the fics to bring you this childish kind of pure joy; the little in-between moment of forgetting about everything, good and bad, and just have a good time. this chapter is definitely one of those rare things and it also made me wish there would be more jonmichael fics from cuttoth. somehow they nailed everything that should be nailed about this ship and did it in a couple of pages, what a magical work!! 
and well, now here's my fave fic, the one that took my head, shaked it like it's a soda can, and then left it open, fountaining at first and then dented and empty. 
I ask for nothing, but maybe I'm lying is the work that made me grateful for the fact that i know how to read in english. its....mmmm, you know that feeling when fic makes you go through literally everything? and then, as a bonus, through all stages of grief as well?
first you get hooked up by the beautiful writing style and so you know the fic is gonna be good and you get comfortable and you turn yourself off from the rest of the world and you read. 
you love pov, you love mood shifts, you love pacing, you love when scenes are short and you pause to think about what happened / you love when scenes are long and you get overloaded with the simple things that make you feel complicated emotions, you love it all. 
then you start to wish it would never finish; you look at the scrolling bar from time to time, a little bit too aware of how much there's left to read, a little bit too anxious about it. and at the same time, the fic starts to make you feel safe, confident, that at least it's gonna be alright, its gonna be that one work that will replace the canon events for you. it was the
“Oh. Oh, Archivist, no. That’s not right at all,” you say to yourself as you watch him march into artefact storage, both hands clamped around an axe. 
On a whim, you decide to save him."
line for me for sure uhhh it still hits as good as the first time too 
and then you get to the ending and you just stare at the screen. that hollowing feeling slowly spreading inside you. *sigh* its the best sort of inspiration im sure, but its the worse one too. i have no idea how possessedradios and authors like them are able to write something that kills you, then reanimates you and then makes you sit in front of the tablet drawing hours non stop. ''I ask for nothing, but maybe I'm lying" is so beautiful its scares and fascinates me, just like the podcast did. hell, better then the podcast did.  i know its silly but i even named my fisrt fanart of michael as the title of the fic 👉👈
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ahhhh SO i rumbled again SORRY!!!!!!! every time someone asks something from me its either "i'll reply later" (replies 10 years after) or "tolstoy, hold my fucking beer". but i really hope that fic writers, not only those who are mentioned here but like in general? know how much they affect other people!! how their work creates safe spaces for others!! how they make readers smile or cry, even if those readers (im not pointing finger on myself idk what you talking about pgphpphph) are little gremlins that leaving comments once in a decade....................
have fun time reading!! <3
btw im working on a little fanart rn............. (expressing my deepest grattitude to ao3 johmichael writers 😳🔪)
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hannibals-favourite-meal · 1 year ago
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.⋆。You’re My To-Do List。⋆.
Clark Kent x plus size reader
A break in the day’s pack schedule means that Clark is going to be in your pants.
Warnings: domestic fluff, mom!reader, implied smut, oral (f receiving), Conner is still Clark’s clone in this, car sex
WC: 598
A/N: I lost the request I'm so sorry!
Minors DNI
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3000 Follower Celebration
With five kids, three of which were just under two, it was almost impossible to have a moment alone with your husband and when you did, there was never enough time for sex. So when there was a 10 minute gap between dropping Jon off at the Wayne’s and picking up the triplets from daycare, Clark wanted to take full advantage. 
You were looking down at your shopping list, mentally going over all the things you would need for the week when suddenly the mini van swerved and you were thrown against the passenger door. “Clark!” But your husband wasn’t listening. Instead he was directing the car down an empty road off of the private lane from Wayne Manor. Once he felt you were far enough from the main road, he shut off the engine and turned to you.
“Take off your pants, get in the back.” 
“Clark no. We have things to do.” He pouted.
“Yeah I know, you’re on my to-do list. See.” He pulled out his phone and showed you his notes app, where at the top it said ‘to-do list’ with a simple ‘eat my wife’s pussy’ right under. You sighed heavily through your nose. Clark was almost glaring at you with a determination you had only seen him use in the most dire of circumstances.
Damn those big blue eyes. You glanced down at your phone and made a note of the time. “You have five minutes.” The click of the seatbelt releasing and his large hands on your wide hips were your only warning before you found yourself in the very back of the car, with your lower half completely naked. 
He nestled his broad shoulder between your plump thighs and pressed his face to your core. You sagged against the seats as he pushed the tip of his nose against your clit like he was trying to breathe you in. You tangled your fingers in his curls as you used your dominant hand to pick up your phone once more. The shopping list was slowly getting longer as Clark took his sweet time lapping at you but not doing much more than that.
“Oh remind me that we need to pick up some more laundry detergent for Conner, I’m pretty sure he’s been using your mom’s. And the girls need glitter from some project the day care wants to do. And Diana mentioned- ow! What the fuck! Did you just bite me!” And sure enough, Clark pulled away from your inner thigh where a nice deep indent of his teeth now lay in your soft skin. A smug grin pulled at his lips, the same grin that resulted in you birthing four big-headed babies.
“Will you just shut up and let me go down on you? I haven’t tasted this perfect little pussy in almost a month and I know that we both need it.” He begged and scooted closer so he could rest his cheek on your mound. “Please just forget all of that shit for five minutes and let me make you feel good.”
Your hand fell from his hair to his jaw, stroking the stubble that he hadn’t had time to get rid of. “Okay okay. I guess you’re right, it has been a while and we’re both a bit pent up.” He smiled at you, kissing the tips of your fingers. 
“Of course I’m right! Now let me get to work.” And then he threw your legs over his shoulder and got down to business. 
Long story short, you were 20 minutes late picking up your toddlers.
Request: Can I please request number 20 with clark kent, pretty please?
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azmodeusjay · 5 days ago
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Hello Jon,
Just as i had hoped, you are alone,
Reading my letter on the floor.
This feeling compares to none.
Now it finally has begun.
Ending the world is no small work,
But let me show you what its worth.
A peak behind the curtain is well deserved.
You may just be my tool, but this much you've earned.
As time flew by, i have remained,
With hunger for knowledge I've yet to attain.
Many alleys lost to trial.
Emotional attachment is not my style.
I have built this tower of sight
To extand the time of my prime.
It's granted me powers, overseeing it all.
I may be sat here, but i'm as free as a dove.
Jon, can't you see?
It's all for power and immortality!
Don't shame me for pursuing simple pleasures.
Many others would choose no better.
Don't fear the fate that is near.
Your words must not be unclear.
For this moment i have prayed, you'll like it here,
In this world that we've made, repeat after me:
You who watch and know and understand none.
You who's power shall block out the sun.
You who take all that's not yours by right.
You who drink the true moments of fright.
Come to us in your perfection!
Bring all that is fear with said action!
So bring forth all that crawls and chokes and blinds
And falls and twists and leaves and weaves and hides
And hunts and burns and rips and bleeds and dies!
For all the pain they're not ready for
I open the door!
It's midnight and i suddenly felt the need to write Mag 160 into a little poem. I'm not a poet, im not good at this. I never learned learned anything about how to write poems in english. (My first lanuage isn't english.)
Its bad, and im sorry
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stevie-petey · 8 months ago
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HIHIHIHII can i please request a blurb where bug jon steve and nancy have a sleepover or having fun together? and maybe the kids can be included?
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH AND UR WORK UGH MAKES ME WANNA CRY 😭🎀
of course ! n thank you for the compliment omg
enjoy <3
"dude, what if jonathan had become your brother or something?" mike asks dustin with disgust in his voice as he watches you and jonathan help arrange the picnic blanket. nancy helps steve with the platters of food you had so carefully prepared. it's the first day of spring and youd been adamant that you, all the teens, and the party have a small picnic in the park to get some fresh air.
"dude!" dustin hits his shoulder, entirely unamused. "dont remind me about that, it was a close call."
"at least he isnt dating your sister now." mike groans.
max slides next to him on the park bench. "who is dating who again?"
"nancy is with jonathan and y/n has some weird thing with steve going on." lucas explains, but even he doesnt quite understand a lot of it still, and he frowns. "although, for a while there we thought jonathan and y/n would get married while nancy was with steve."
"they were not going to get married." dustin shrieks, absolutely horrified by that idea.
"im confused." now max is the one that frowns. "so jonathan and y/n werent dating?"
"yes." dustin and mike say, while lucas and will say, "no."
"that wasnt an answer." el points out, slightly confused yet content to listen to the conversation.
maxs frown deepens, now completely confused about the relationships between all the teens. "none of you are helping."
suddenly you appear, steve following close behind, and you flick dustins ear. "if you guys are done gossiping about our love lives, im about to lay the cake out."
"ow!" your brother rubs his now sore ear. "whyd you flick me?"
"you were the closest." you shrug at him before glancing at max. "and to answer your question: no, i never dated jonathan."
"allegedly," steve whispers, winking at the kids, which causes them to laugh. when you turn to glare at him, he quickly shuts his mouth and gulps. "sorry?"
you roll your eyes at him and point towards the cake still in his car. "grab the dessert before i throw something at you."
"yes maam," he sighs, ducking his head down as he hurries over to the car to retrieve the cake.
the kids laugh again, this time at steves expense, and nancy and jonathan now join. when notice the laughter, nancy looks around and tries to understand what shes missed. "did something happen?"
dustin opens his mouth, but you quickly cover it in fear of what he may say. "nope, nothing. now, lets all just grab our food-"
a scream, followed by a thud of two bodies colliding, interrupts you.
everyone turns towards the source of the sound and find steve and jonathan, covered in cake, sprawled on the ground.
immediately the kids lose their minds laughing, dustin practically falls off of the bench as he hunches over in laughter. meanwhile, you and nancy rush over to the teens in concern yet slight amusement.
you stand over steve and jonathan, a smirk on your face. they look so fucking pathetic covered in cake. "now, boys. what did your mothers say about playing with your food?"
"not funny," jonathan grumbles, wiping cream out of his eyes before angrily pointing at steve. "someone decided to trip over a tree branch and take the other down with him."
"was it you?" nancy asks innocently, a glint in her eyes. you giggle at her quip while jonathan closes his eyes and sighs.
steve gives everyone a thumbs up, though its hard to tell due to his finger covered in a thick layer of cake. he sees this, thinks for a moment, and then brings his thumb to his mouth. "mmm, not bad, y/n. this a new recipe?"
you and nancy groan in unison while the kids all look at one another in varying states of disbelief. mike looks disappointed, dustin is ashamed, el is still giggling, and lucas just puts his face in his hands.
"seriously, im expected to believe that y/n saw something in those two?" max says out loud to no one in particular.
"nancy, too." mike sighs, now even more disappointed.
dustin drops his head down onto the picnic table and sighs as well. "i dont wanna talk about it."
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raynetheinsane · 8 months ago
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Batfam (and friends) as Henry Danger quotes
(Because im a nerd and love this show)
Damian: Tt, my parties arent that bad
Jon: Christmas. 3 years ago. 15 kids ended up in the hospital!
Damian: FATHER!!!
Tim: Damian! Were trying to study here *indicates to Duke and Steph, both clearly not studying*
Damian: I’m talking to my Father.
Robin!Jason: Dangit! All these jobs say i gotta have skills..
Dick: You have skills!
Jason: Name one.
Dick: You’re a great dancer!
Jason: No I’m not?
Dick: You could take lessons.
(More under the cut i just dont want this to be super duper long)
Bruce: How old are you?
Tim, trying to become robin: Im 13, I’ll be 14. On my next birthday
Dick: Ah so youre aging sequentially
Tim, extremely tired: Do you ever dream about sleeping?
Steph, extremely confused:…no??
Tim: good. If you did youd be dead.
Bruce: Lets ride.
Robin!Jason who is very new to this: Wha- Ride where?
Bruce: We’ve got people in the Jandy River that need saving.
Bruce: Come on.
Jason: You mean we’re going there? Together? Like right now?
Tim, extremely dirty and has a cut on his face walking into Drake Manor:
Jack, not paying attention: Hey Tim, did you get the job?
Tim: Yeah, just finished my first day.
Jack: So hows work?
Tim: Uh it was pretty… interesting.
Bernard: Hey, you never told us what you do at your new job
Tim: *just stares wide eyed silently*
Bruce: While we were patrolling, Poison Ivy stole packs of baby bottles, can you guess why?
Robin!Dick: Uhhh
Bruce: To flood the bottles with radioactive plant matter.
Dick: I would not have guessed that.
Jason: I see youre in your pajama pants.
Tim: Yeah its almost midnight, I was studying for this test i have tomorrow
Jason: What subject?
Tim: Puerto Rican history
Jason: Ah Puerto Rico… land of…
Tim: Puerto Ricans?
Jason: yeah..
Red Hood: Strike three.
Spoiler: That was only 2
Hood: Okay, don’t correct me in front of the criminals
Duke: Whats in the mug?
Tim, who just poured himself and entire pot of coffee despite hating it: Coffee.
Tim: To keep me alive.
Duke: no, no, no, no, you cannot drink this much coffee after work. This mug is comedically large!
Steph: I have the same dream all the time. It satrts with me getting a horse for my birthday. Then my dad shows up. Then the horse kicks my dad in the face!
Jason, helping Tim study: You want a good grade on your puerto rican math test?
Tim: history
Jason, who died before he finished highschool: Same thing
Non-Bat who needs the antidote for Joker gas or something: Will this hurt?
Black Bat: Yes, very much.
Bernard, talking about a criminal the Bats cant catch: Its not Batmans fault, he just needs a better sidekick
Tim: One more time.
Bernard, who knows: Just saying, I’d be way better at catching criminals than the current Robin
Dick: I’m gonna die..
Jason: Not in the house. If you’re gonna die, do it outside
Tim: I’m Robin.
Bernard: I know. I figured that out.
Damian: Todd, I wish to speak to you about something.
Jason: BABIES COME FROM THE BABY STORE
Oracle: Steph, come to Gotham Park right now!
Steph: noo, I’m not in the mood for trees
Oracle: did i ask you what youre in the mood for?
Vikki Vale: So, Spoiler, how did you catch Two Face?
Spoiler: I’d love to take all the credit, but it was really all thanks to my partner, Black Bat.
Vikki: Interesting. Black Bat, can you tell us more?
Black Bat: No.
It really bothers me the lack of Babs, Cass, and Duke worthy quotes there are 😔😔 also my personal favs show a lot and im sorry for that, but there will be more as i think of them, these are just eps 1-4, the rest will be posted like in a queue or something and as single quotes cus im eepy
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