#It's just me making myself suffer
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Dangerously yours
"If i betray you, i betray myself."
"If i betray him, i betray my country."
"My country is very dear to me."
"Dearer than i?"
"..."
"No, not dearer than you."
I saw an edit with this song and immediately thought of NoMae.💔
#I'm suffering#They are everything to me#I want them to be together#It's just me making myself suffer#forbidden love#mae x noa#nomae#noa x mae#rise of the planet of the apes#owen teague#freya allan#kingdom of the planet of the apes#planet of the apes#Pain
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Jealousy, Jealousy
#friend jealousy is a BITCH and i think kei would definitely suffer from it#he made one (1) friend in elementary school and decided it was enough for one lifetime#but now theyre in HS and tadashi is a lot more out of his shell than he previously was and oh look :) now hes making more friends#i just KNOW it eats kei up. watching his best friend laugh with other people.#i think this would be the first time too which is why its a particularly big blow like#for so long its been him and tadashi that this was never a concern#so now he doesnt know how to manage this ugly emotion#definitely see him get snappier with hinata and kageyana#goes unnoticed tho because he usually tends to be an ass to them anyway#Man.#SIGH.#this came to me in a vision and i made myself upset so LOL. Releases this to the wild yaay…#haikyuu#haikyuu!!#tsukishima kei#yamaguchi tadashi#queerplatonic if you understand the workd#tsukkiyama#hq#lots to the read in the tags lol sorry…
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what's with them.....🤨
#boo soul eater jumpscare#soul eater#souma#soma#my art#I had a very nice day today until it went down hill#save me souma.. souma save me....#next time i should really just type the dialogue instead of making myself suffer by writing it
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kill your darling, it's just that easy!
#tlt#my art#i reblogged these outfits the other day that were giving me big ianthe & naberius vibes so i wanted to draw something with them#got really funky w/ this one! i just wanted to play around i havent had the chance to draw in a while#so i just kinda let myself do whatever w/ the colors and art style and everything#idk how i feel about it but it was fun#anyway ive seen some posts suggesting that ianthe somehow cheated the system by sacrificing naberius and like...#no she absolutely did not? she paid that price exactly by the book (making her one of the few to actually do so)#and now she suffers forever for it :)#oh the line on top is a quote from the book and the caption is a lyric from 'kill your darling' by cloudy june#(which aside from that one line is not at all a ianthe&naberius song lmao)
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#kind of a redraw#jing yuan#honkai star rail#fanart#this was done in a desperated attempt to convince myself that i can still continue#but i just dont think its worth it#art just makes me suffer way too much
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noticing in your vents—
is your sister okay too?
We laugh, sure, but we both know we're not ok.
#messyr#vent post#we have separate fams and both of us are the eldest. She mostly stays at mother side and I stay at my father's although dad is never home.#The rest of the members in my father side can put quips here and there to make her feel guilty and she does get guilty mostly about money#I ALSO provide them and HER financial support while also trying to pay for myself. I'm VERY exhausted.#unlike me she's not caged up here- but with a few restrictions still#while im BOUND to my family (father side) and they always target me so that's a pretty neat deal than seeing my sister suffer the same#just thinking of it makes me want to throw up HAHAH#there are times- she does things by action or words that makes me feel like- yknow. she loves me back. that's enough for me
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Wally: What are you in the mood for?
Dick: World domination.
Wally: That's an interesting choice…?
Dick: You are my world.
Wally: Aww...
Dick:
Wally:
Dick:
Wally: OH.
#if you know you know#raises eyebrow#why do u know#huh#???#mhm#that’s sus#omg aint no way I just said sus 😭😭😭#ignore me please#why am i like this#I make myself suffer#dickwally#dick grayson#richard grayson#wallydick#wally west#birdflash#dc incorrect quotes#incorrect quotes
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Busy morning
Inspired by Mornings, With You (and coffee, too) by @lurethegalaxy
#go read the fic i beg you#hmm should i tag it with#tw blood#endhawks#bnha#adelaida art#adelaida comic#so i read this fic like a month ago and oh boy making your fav charas suffer sure is a thing i like#(looks at my and Kitte's dying Kakashi collab; good times good times)#the fluff tastes just different when their life is in danger#I don't think I ever drew characters bleeding out (except kakashi) (twice) but I really really wanted to try#this one here took me a while but i had a blast from the start till the end#pushed myself a bit out of my comfort zone too#so thank you @lurethegalaxy for making it happen <3
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Mouthwashing AU where the crew beats the shit out of Jimmy and kills him and makes it back to Earth and gets help and lives happily<3333
Mouthwashing AU where Curly beats the shit out of Jimmy and kills him for assaulting Anya when he found out<3333
Mouthwashing AU where Anya beats the shit out of and kills Jimmy herself and makes it back to Earth with her friends and they’re ok and getting help<3333
#mouthwashing#jimmy when I catch you Jimmy#I am jimmys number one hater#I am Anya and Curlys number one fan#of course I love Daisuke and Swansea too#Anya and Curly just have such a chokehold on me#fuck curly for not helping Anya and letting Jimmy get away for his crime but also damn why’d he have to suffer like that#this game makes me go crazy#genuinely thinking about getting it and playing it even tho I do noooott play horror games#love watching them be played but I can’t handle them myself💀💀#but I wanna experience this game sooo bad
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here's 18-19 year old aang sketches. been hearing aang is ugly discourse—no he ain't. he was just 12.
#i really wanted to take part in zukaang bingo but the urge to art struck me a little later#i still might make something else later#enough art for now#i'd try to participate in maiko week but i'm not sure#it's smack in the middle of end semester exams#ink blot#avatar fanart#avatar the last airbender#atla#artists on tumblr#fanart#avatar aang#why did i never use the pencil brush before?!?! i seriously have a personality flaw where i just don't explore stuff.#can you believe i've been using the same fucking brush for lineart ever since i started digital art?#anyways! i don't know how the pencil brush would feel like if i go for colours but this is impeccable.#I have more control over stuff and i love the result#so#i have promised myself i'd be fucking off this hellsite because i have a huge backlog of work that needs to be done#and i'm presently suffering from “can't help but art”. so#yeah. y'all would probably see me around maiko week. byeee!#if i deprive myself of drawing for too long it bursts out of me like this where i do nothing but draw#not healthy at all
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a 2 act tragedy starring me: i’ve been making fruit smoothies in the morning for a few days which has been great because it’s getting me to actually eat fruit for once, only to go on the internet and be told that it apparently releases all the natural sugars so it's actually Not that great for you and i am devastated
#ramble#i thought i was doing myself SO many favours#i ENJOY FRUIT i just don’t eat it for some reason related to adhd#context i am a long term ED sufferer so this kind of thing upsets me#honestly i don't care that much because it feels like it's better than Zero Fruit#can any dieticians put my mind at ease#someone explain how ‘the natural sugars are released and become Bad Sugar’ makes sense. like it’s all just the FRUIT#chanting to myself ‘there are no bad foods there are no bad foods there are no bad foods’#like the Nutrients are still there and some of the fibre is still there#tw ed#on a lighter note current fave is pineapple+orange#also kiwi which i didn’t think would be good#edit: WAIT YOU’RE RIGHT WOULDN’T THE SUGARS BE RELEASED THE EXACT SAME WAY BY JUST CONSUMING THE FRUIT. WHAT THE FUCK
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A two parter story about Nine not keeping his mouth shut when asked and the result of that, which he didn't bother sticking by and see through, of which Part 1 is at the ready and spans 7,870 words!!!
Also taking this out of the tags and saying the two locations mentioned (the seamstresses and Oakley's) are my friends @erissaacorn's oc ideas that I yoinked for my own nefarious purposes!!
Part 2: Mesure once, cut twice
---
His foot met soft grass that was slightly wet either from morning dew or recent heavy rain, and the portal closed right behind him.
Putting his hand above his face to block out the bright sun, Nine looked around the new universe.
At first, he would've written it off as just yet another Green Hill with the rolling grassy plains and radiant blue sky, but upon closer inspection, there were barely any hills and the grass seemed far too irregular to be that of the ever-present universe he keeps stumbling upon.
Whatever this place was, it turned out he didn't find himself too far away from a village, which, he wasn't sure was all that good news. Dealing with people, and especially strangers, was still far from his favorite activities, but the fox decided to shoot his shot anyway, seeing as there literally wasn't anything for as far as the eye could see but grass and more grass.
"Well hello there new face!"
...Of course.
"It's not too often we get outsider visitors, what brings you here!"
The ever-familiar blue hedgehog stood just ways off next to him with his hand outstretched for a greeting handshake.
Nine figured it was only polite to return the pleasantries, although his attention was immediately grabbed by the clothes this Sonic was wearing and just how young he looked.
The simple, golden crown sitting on his forehead, with a collared baby blue, long-sleeved shirt with wide cuffs adorned by gold and darker blue pants tucked into yellow, knee-high boots sure was something that Nine didn't think in any universe to be the hedgehog's style, especially not for his younger self, but he's seen all manner of things at this point.
"The name's Dream, guardian of the positive apples, nice to meet you."
Alright, color him even more curious in the first five seconds.
"Nine, I am... just passing by."
Nine looked around inconspicuously and found no twin-tailed fox in sight. Strange.
"Oh, well, depending on how long you plan on staying, I could be your tour guide!"
The chipper attitude of this Sonic must've rubbed off on him already as he didn't have it in him to decline, and nodded.
Following after the exited blue spike ball, the casual chatter and ambiance of the settlement almost immediately enveloped him, and he dared to say it almost felt cozy. The houses were made almost fully of wood and frequented dirt paths layered with rocks tied them together.
The inhabitants that noticed him — both human and mobian alike — gave him strange looks, but besides being used to that, the fox decided to chalk it up to looking extremely out of place in a primitive (ahem, simple) place like this.
Sonic on the other hand waved at and greeted almost every other person they came across. This means he must be either really popular, or everyone here knew each other by default given the relatively small size of the village.
The further they went, and the more porches with children picking and throwing grass at each other while laughing they passed, the more... picturesque, it all looked.
Like a drawing he'd find in an old, discarded storybook at the bottom of a dumpster an orphaned little fox would find and read through day and night over and over, wishing he could just go there.
Nine shook his head.
With living in the story book came suspension of disbelief, followed by an ominous, uncanny feeling. It all looked way too happy and clean, but he saved any further judgement for later.
"Here's Oakley's, the carpenters, where he can fix or create anything made out of wood! Though he's been kind of sick lately and the golden apple I gave him doesn't seem to be helping much."
Coming back to the present, Nine noted the second mention of the so-called 'golden apples' after they passed by a large dark brown house with a busy porch.
It was lined with chairs and other pieces of common wooden furniture, with its doors and window frames carved into charming patterns.
He particularly lingered on a cute wooden duck with wheels for feet and a string tied around its neck sitting on one of the tables. Not that he wanted it, but the fact it was most likely carved by hand, so he simply admired the craftsmanship. That, and it was the closest thing in his line of sight anyway.
They passed by a fruit stall next, and the smell of fresh fruit convinced him he felt just a little hungry. Though he learned to be careful with the food items from other universes at this point, after a few unfortunate events.
No matter, his pockets were empty both of any money and any other item he figured could have the same value as an apple to people in here.
"C'mon take one, we can't have our guest going hungry after all!"
Sonic seemed to read his mind though, or it was simply reactive generosity that the fox had no intention of declining. It was just an apple after all. Most likely. Hopefully.
Perfomatively wiping it into his shirt, Nine enjoyed the fruit to its full capacity as he followed the hedgehog around with no end goal in mind.
While in any other universe he'd find backseat shopping the most mind-numbing activity imaginable, he didn't have it in him to be frustrated in the slightest here for some reason.
Sonic dragged him back to the present yet again by pointing at another larger than the rest house.
"And this is the shop of our seamstress. She can tailor you the most beautiful, or if function is more of your thing, durable attire from almost any piece of fabric in no time! Though you can never expect where a conversation with her leads haha."
"Did she tailor your clothes too?" The fox asked mostly because the more he looked at the hedgehog, the more out of place he felt among the average villager here. Everyone was mostly wearing dark brown, beige, or white, simple clothing with aprons and hats, while Sonic looked like he should sit in a castle or a chapel of some sort.
"Not really, no, mine and Night's clothes were given to us by our mother."
"Tch, you look almost like a lost prince." Nine remarked with a smirk while noted yet another unusual mention of Sonic's seemingly biological family. Though the remark was meant as a sort of a pseudo compliment he wasn't sure it sounded like it.
"You think so, haha!"
Sonic ran with it though and didn't seem bothered by his attitude in the slightest. That was always just a matter of time anyway, but Nine decided to turn his attention towards what appeared to be a small bookstall that they stopped in front of now.
Small as in, one shelf of books sorted by... nothing as far as he could pick out, with a tiny mouse girl behind the counter.
Upon hearing Sonic's order she carefully handed him the book from the bottom shelf, instructing him to be careful with it, to which Sonic gave a smug nod yet held the book like it was made of porcelain until he turned back to the fox.
"Alright I think this is actually all I wanted, we can finally return to the tree and I can introduce you to Night too."
Sonic said with a smile and the book safely tucked under his arm.
Fine, so safe to assume that Tails exists in this universe. It's honestly jarring that he hasn't seen the other part of the seemingly inseparable duo no matter the universe yet. If anything he in vain expected the bright yellow fox to jump them a few streets back.
Perhaps he was sick and that's why Sonic went shopping for him?
They were about to continue their way and Nine was looking for a place to throw the leftover of his apple when a group of kids that paid him no mind almost ran him over, giggling. He wanted to curse them out and noted the two red foxes among the four of them, before his attention was dragged just a bit higher.
"Dream! You have not forgotten about the garden, have you?"
A female voice suddenly yelled out, but Nine ignored the mystery woman with all of his attention on the absolute behemoth of a tree sitting atop the hill in front of him.
Literally, how did he not notice that sooner was beyond him, but questioning his peripheral vision aside, he decided to nonchalantly turn his head back to face Sonic and the woman.
Her notably black hair was tied in a high ponytail and she held a set of baskets on her hip. Sonic stood just a ways away from her, looking between the items in his hands, the woman, and Nine, with his startled eyes lingering on the fox.
"Um, this is kind of important, if you could take this up and to Night?"
Sonic sheepishly extended the items forward, and normally Nine would've protested at the sudden turn of events, but decided to wordlessly take the two things from the hedgehog's hands instead.
"Ah, are you sure he doesn't want to go with us?" The woman inquired with an almost sickly sweet demeanor that Nine was immediately not fond of.
He eyed her, but tried to make his distrust not all that noticeable when he declined
"No thank you, I don't really do gardening."
"You sure darling? we could use an extra pair of hands."
"Miss Katheryne come on, no need to drag an unsuspecting passerby into pulling weeds eh. I'm well equipped for that job alone."
Sonic dragged her attention from the fox as he tried to pry one of the two baskets from her grip and Nine let out an internal sigh of relief.
She let the hedgehog take it while the other container fell over to her side and she let out a nervous giggle "Alright alright, well, enjoy your stay little one, you're of course welcome to stop by at any time."
Afterward she wordlessly turned around, with Sonic waving him a temporary goodbye.
Nine kept his eyes on the duo before they disappeared over a corner and were out of sight for good. He decided to not bother dissecting the out of pocket interaction as he made his way up the hill. The grass was quite slippery still, which made it difficult to secure his footing and not fall over every other step.
Quiet noises of both distress and laughter immediately sent him on alert however, and he was willing to sacrifice a bit by speeding up his ascend. Each longer step he took with little help from his mechanical tails saved a few centimeters of the incline and he wasn't all that out of breath by the time he met horizontal ground again.
The picture-perfect facade of this universe fell just as hard as the little fox that was shoved to the ground with a yelp by a young bear, who then mercilessly smoothed the fox's face into the ground, effectively muffling any noise he made afterward.
Nine stood frozen for just a second before not thinking twice and giving into the sudden spark of rage in his chest. Wrapping the string holding the bag together around his hand, he steadily made his way towards the little group.
These were surely the same four kids he saw run up the hill just a while ago, if those two cackling red foxes were anything to go by.
One of them grabbed onto Tails' bangs and forcibly lifted his head back off the ground and snorted, most likely finding the kit's face welled up with tears amusing.
Nine spared only a second for eye contact and using the fact neither of the kids noticed him so far for building some momentum into a swing.
The bear's shoulder was harshly met with a bag of apples — that surely felt more like rocks — as he was knocked off the kit and toppled over the red fox.
His pained grunt was mixed with a surprised gasp from the rest of the group left standing, and that's when Nine remembered he had much more effective tools of offense than one bag of fruit.
His mechanical tails sprawled around him, their tips pointed threateningly in front of each of the kid's faces and they all flinched back.
Nine couldn't help the smirk that made its way onto his face.
Good.
One amongst them, a human boy with dark black hair tried to play tough by yelling out and trying to get into his face. Nine felt in no way intimidated by him however, even if he was taller, as the kid was scrawny and had no real weapons that could hold against his. Nine bared his teeth and posed himself just a bit above the ground, which appropriately made the human, alongside everyone else, reconsider and back away just a bit more.
"Tch, you think we're scared of you?!"
Nine narrowed his stare towards the red fox holding his shoulder. A face he recognized and one that he already made turn tail and run the other way when he was much younger and weaker.
Nine made a bluff strike that aimed at the fox's chest. The runt appropriately jumped back with any confidence he had dissipating and unease taking over his posture.
"Yes."
"You're way over you head, freak."
He heard the human boy lift a rock and throw it his way. It would've been a successful hit to his head had he not effortlessly blocked it with one of his tails. For a second before that he considered catching it in his hand, but decided to rather keep to a reasonable limit of his abilities to avoid getting too drunk on his power high.
"Pot calling the cattle black."
Nine simply stated with a grin as he picked up the rock nonchalantly.
The human gulped as Nine made him his clear target, by all means wanting to return the rock full force back to sender, except at the last second he shot it towards the bear that was already on his way down the hill.
With a yelp, he didn't manage to dodge it and the rock hit his ankle full force.
A fearful face betrayed any bravado the bear might've posed in his statue and Nine's grin only solidified when his ear flicked back.
Apparently, to drive the point further in, and fairly demonstrate the fact he wasn't stupid, he made another bluff strike behind him, spooking the yet uninjured red fox who thought it was a good idea to sneak in a failed surprise attack.
A loose brush with a metal point to his nose seemed to be what finally made the kids decide he wasn't worth it and they promptly ran off the hill while cursing under their breath.
Which left just him, and his lookalike alone under the tree's shade.
The sudden shot of adrenaline slowly dissipated, and he fully reveled in the small catharsis of knowing he was still more than intimidating enough to deal with a pathetic group of bullies like that.
Nine let out a sharp sigh and snapped his mechanical tails back in place, then finally turned towards the person he went up here for in the first place.
Or where he though he would be, but instead found just flattened grass.
The next best place to look was the tree branches above, and sure enough he saw a pair of scared blue eyes looking tearfully back at him.
Nine dropped the bag of apples to the ground unceremoniously and tried handing over the book, basically beckoning the other to come back down.
With all the sudden movement though, Tails all but flinched and retreated further into the tree's crown.
Nine knew that even when the immediate danger was taken care of, his first and then overall impression wasn't exactly friendly, but that was by design.
He sighed.
"I'm not gonna hold my hand out forever. Sonic- Dream sent me to give this to you."
A a bead of silence was followed by a while of rustling leaves and finally a thud sounding from the other side of the tree.
Trained pointy ears peaked from behind the tree trunk and Nine's hand officially gave out.
At long last the other fox showed himself fully and Nine could properly analyze him.
This Tails wore the exact same attire – albeit now dirty from mud and grass – as Sonic. Except the color scheme was purple and brown, with a roughed-up golden cape draped around his shoulders and the simplistic crown smooshing the three strands of fur on his forehead sported a hollow out of a crescent moon.
He went to take the book, but Nine's hand sprung back a little too fast and Tails hesitated.
With a deadpan expression Nine didn't react too much on it and waited until the other finally let his hand fall empty and free.
He figured that he could at least offer the basics of sympathies, although not make it seem like he was high and ready to patch up the kit's, hopefully, only superficial injuries.
"Nothing broken?"
Tails shook his head.
"Good."
Nine then took a few steps back and slumped against the tree, finding a comfortable place between the roots.
At a loss on how to carry this interaction further, Nine crossed his hands over his chest and looked to the village bellow. While at it, he realized he most likely marked himself a future target, if the human kid's familiar features had anything to say but he digressed.
Whatever whiny tantrums they'll throw is at most a future him's problem.
The face of the red fox flashed fore him and Nine to turn back towards the other sitting under the tree.
"How often do you have to deal with those."
Albeit his question might fall on mute mouth since so far this Tails hasn't spoken a word, though Nine hoped it was just the result of stress as he didn't feel like navigating a nonverbal conversation.
Tails merely grabbed the golden cape around himself like a protective blanket while, thankfully, trying to find his voice.
"I-its, um, it's a rare occurrence really I j-just..." He shook his head and slumped back against the bark, seemingly trying to sink into the ground bellow. "Thank you, anyway."
Tails stared at his book that he finally opened in his lap, but it was obvious he wasn't reading, mind stuck on and busy processing other things.
"...It's not often someone bothers with that."
The insecurity in that barely audible whisper apparent, Nine grit his teeth. He had a faint inkling he knew exactly what was going on here.
"Have you tried fighting back?"
Tails fiddled with the corners of a few pages with his eyes downcast before answering "Not really. I'm sure if I did it they would just get meaner, anyway."
Fair point, which for a second made Nine reconsider his immediate and almost absolute suggestion. Fighting back without any means to secure victory and make it stick would cause more harm than good.
Looking back down and around, the view from up here was pretty enchanting to say the least, and the air seemed slightly lighter too.
His attention was soon back to the tree however, and the shimmering specks of fruit hanging from it. It was hard to immediately tell with the sun hitting some of them directly, but they were two different colors.
Nine marked them as the golden apples Sonic kept going on about.
Eventually, his eyes ended up back down, looking at the little fox huddled on the ground. Upon more careful inspection, this Tails also looked really young, maybe around six or five years old, and the notion of that made him frown when counting in his banged-up state.
Ignoring the current bruises and messy fur, there was an obvious scar on the bridge of his snout, what was definitely dried blood under his nose, multiple patches of ripped fur from his otherwise bushy namesakes, and quite heavy eyebags under his eyes.
Nine also noted the kit contradicted himself right in the second sentence he said, but after noticing all that, there was no way Nine's buying the previous scene being a rare occurrence.
Tails is universally bullied most commonly for his namesakes — and that's a fact as he came to find out — but that usually ceases after his pretty much fated meeting with Sonic. Which, doesn't seem to be the case here for whatever reason.
Nine eventually tired of standing in the middle of the hill and sticking out like a sore thumb, so he made his way towards the apple tree and sat one clump of roots over, next to the kit as nonchalantly as possible. Although he made a makeshift chair of his mechanical tails as he didn't really feel like sitting on damp and uneven grass.
Giving it a few seconds to get comfortable, Nine then peered over the wood separating them. The uncharacteristic deviation from the almost universal relationship between the fox and the hedgehog kept nagging his mind.
"Does Dream know about this?"
The tense silence from the other was more than enough of an answer.
"Why don't you tell him, I'm sure he'd be able to do something about it."
The guardian's downcast expression turned sour, with a few creases appearing on the book's pages.
"I don't think so. Everyone loves him, but only because it literally makes them feel good when he's around. And that he has trouble saying no to people when they ask something of him, so they find him useful."
Finally giving up, Tails closed the book and set it aside, then hugged his legs close to his chest and rested his head on his knees.
"I'm sure if he went against them because of me, they would not take kindly to it."
Nine soaked up the words and was actually taken aback by the bluntness, but it seemed that so was Tails himself.
"I'm sorry this is, um. You're not from here, are you? I'd rather not make this one of your problems, I don't think you have to see too deep into it."
Nine realized his expression has gone too soft at that, and took his time to distance himself from the other.
Yeah, yea Tails was correct in fact. There was no reason to care about something that will ultimately be inconsequential to him. A few minutes in, it was obvious this universe was far from ideal place for him to stay, as one, he definitely doesn't feel like raising two orphaned kids in a village so obviously biased, so whatever squabble or interpersonal relationship wasn't his business. And two, there was little to no technology present besides handcarved wooden ducks, which would sooner or later drive him insane.
He let complete apathy wash over him and grabbed the MTC in his hand.
But while he could just get up and leave at any moment...
Looking at the other fox from the corner of his eye, he couldn't help but feel just the tiniest bit of sympathy hold him down.
He knows more than anyone how much it would mean if someone stepped in just once before he had to do it himself. And if the technological state of this village was anything to go by, that would prove to be just a bit more trouble for the Tails in here.
"The name's Nine by the way."
The fox's ear flicked towards him, followed by an unsure expression.
"Nightmare."
That sure is... a peculiar name.
"Big brother calls me Night though, which sounds very similar to your name actually." Tails gave a weak smile at that and finally turned his head to face Nine.
"Hmm, yeah it kinda does." There wasn't much that came to mind in terms of an answer to that though, and he let the conversation die right after.
Wait. Oh was this like, a sun and moon type deal. Dream and Nightmare, purple and yellow, golden and black and all that.
Nine playfully rolled his eyes at not getting the very obvious theme sooner.
Though, Idly sitting here made him realize just how exhausted he was from his constant hopping back and forth between all manner of worlds, so he figured there was nothing wrong with taking a little break from all that. Maybe he'll stay overnight and a bit of tomorrow after all.
Or maybe he'll just take a nap right here and now and set out again afterward.
He crossed both his legs and hands while keeping his ears trained for the smallest movement going around.
The purpose of it was defensive, just in case anyone else gets any funny ideas while he appears low on guard, but it leaned in the side effect of making him soak in a stray bird song, undertoned by the rustle of hundreds of leaves under a gentle, albeit slightly chilly breeze that was nicely canceled out by the warm shade the tree provided.
Even if he could never truly afford to relax, this was probably the closest to something like that he'd ever get. That is until he finds a proper home. Hopefully.
"Where are you from though, I never seen anything similar to those metal tails you have."
That threw a wrench in his plans. Although it was rather foolish of him to assume Tails would just, be quiet the whole time, and not wonder about the random stranger that just wandered into his favorite hiding place for all he knows.
"Where I'm from is not important, I'm basically a homeless wanderer at this point." Nine settled on forcing out. And his place of origin really meant nothing to him. If anything he was glad most of his memories of New Yoke were faded and unclear as were that of Shatterverse. He didn't belong to either of those, and so there was no use in remembering them.
"You look really familiar."
"No duh, I have your exact face- don't worry about that too much though." Nine quickly backpedaled, he didn't feel like explaining the concept of the multiverse right now, as he warily stole a glance at the other fox.
"Well, maybe a little less babyish but still."
"No not like that I mean- yea nevermind."
Tails went silent again, seemingly regretting his choice to speak up in the first place.
A small pang of guilt hit Nine when he saw the other shrink into himself again, and he sighed.
"Ok, well then what do you mean?"
It took a second. But the guardian took time to regain the bit of his confidence to speak back up.
"...Those, metal tails of yours, when you were scaring off the other kids a while ago, they made your silhouette look like someone I frequently see in my dreams."
That... was sure something Nine wasn't expecting to hear, but he'd be lying if he said some curiosity wasn't piqued. This universe sure had its way of doing that.
"As in, a prophetic way or..?"
"In a nightmare way, actually." The other stated matter-of-factly, but when Nine creased his brow, he immediately went on defensive
"Don't take it as me being rude or superstitious! I'm really not! It's just, uh, an observation." He then chuckled weakly, most likely hoping to decrease the tension, but Nine was neutral with that notion honestly, not even knowing whether he should think anything of it at all.
He never attributed any deep meanings to dreams, as they were just recreations of his lived experience, which, were far from pleasant. Whatever Nightmare here is going through is the same most likely.
But it made him think, that maybe little him would be proud to have have a silhouette someone would see in their recurring nightmares, a bit.
He placed one of his mechanical tails in his hand and for the first time after a long time, carefully examined them again. Their dull casing was scarred by dents and scratches from their years of active use, with the gear holding this particular segment firmly kept in its place with the neon underglow still active.
For a second he was back in his workshop as a much younger self, grinning like a maniac after he connected the last of the needed pieces together and finally tried out the finished tails (after many failed prototypes) with an immeasurable amount of pride in his chest.
He smiled, reminiscing, until the guardian's small voice shook him from his stupor.
"Anyway, you said Dream send you here?"
He let the tail fall from his hand.
"Pretty much. He wanted to come along but some lady stopped him and dragged him off to clean weeds or something. I don't remember."
"And she just let you go?"
"Begrudgingly, but yea. Why?"
Tails went quiet again, picking at the tips of his namesakes with pursed lips.
"The villagers...they don't really like me."
The fox started slowly with his ears pinned back.
"But they don't want Dream to know that. So some of them will distract him and keep him occupied, while others will- well, I don't know how much you saw but, they're usually a bit more vicious than that."
Tails shook his head and finally uncurled from his position, picking up the book again.
"I was just wondering for how long he'd be away again. If Katheryne took him then it's probably until sunset..."
The way the little guardian spoke made it all the more clear this was not just a repetitive torment from the side of the stupid kids, but a calculated move from the adults as well.
Sudden anger began to bubble in Nine, but he wasn't sure who it was directed at. He'd much rather dismiss it as Tails reading too much into it, but it's him that lives here, not Nine.
Something about that woman's insistence he'd come along before Sonic interjected now justified his negative hunch about her.
The anger must've taken to the surface and Nine lost control of his facial features, as whatever was his face showing alerted the fox next to him.
"But you won't tell him, Right? I- I already said I can't drag him down with me, you can't."
Nine looked at him for a second, for some reason stumped for an answer. The simple decision would be to just say fine, and leave it at that, turn away, and forget about this world just like the others. But that self-evident and most rational decision didn't seem all that appealing based on the very little window he had just seen into this universe.
He'd be a liar if he kept telling himself he didn't care for the kit. Even if it was more of a project-y sort of rage towards the people here he doesn't even know, than sympathy for his situation (for some reason).
Nine internally groaned and forced himself to seal a promise he wasn't 100% sold on keeping.
"I won't say a word."
Tails well, it was hardly a smile he gave once his shoulders finally dropped with the release of tension, and he sunk back to his spot.
The words fizzled out once more.
Sun continued its path through the blue sky unbothered by any event beneath it and ever so slowly dimmed as silent minutes ticked by. Eventually, the leaves were accompanied by the flicker of book pages as Tails finally started reading.
Nine began to thread the line between sleep and consciousness when a sudden yawn ripped through him.
The kit next to him audibly flinched and Nine toppled back into being mostly aware of his surroundings. His nose twitched in annoyance.
"I um, I forgot you were here." Tails laughed nervously. Nine attempted to ignore him however and tried to take the only long term functioning remedy for that yawn.
Tails didn't let him have it as he suddenly hopped up and snatched the bag of apples Nine dropped off not that far away, making it Nine's turn to flinch.
"We, I mean, me and my brother don't really have to eat, but it's nice to just munch on something sometimes. Don't know how it's with you but I assure you apples from here taste amazing!"
Nine took the offered apple from the kit's hands but then simply dropped it into his lap.
"Yea I already had one today, thanks either way."
"We'll then you can keep it for your travels!"
All he gave was a small nod, as uninterested as he could be.
"I'm sorry I keep talking, but, one last question."
Nine fought with himself to not audibly groan.
"Um, just how long will you stay here?"
Instead, he huffed, fully abandoning the idea of the nap.
"Probably the night and I'll set out in the morning."
But he suddenly stopped himself when he realized his tone had just a bit too much of an edge to it, not to mention he hadn't used it consciously. Just sitting here, he felt more frustrated than back in the village with Sonic dragging him around like a dog on an invisible leash.
He side-eyed the kit next to him, but he felt insane for the dots it made him connect, so he brushed it off.
He was really tired is all. And someone constantly had to interrupt his attempts at getting a proper rest.
Tails simply hummed in acknowledgment and returned back into his reading.
Unfortunately, Nine was completely offset now and couldn't put his mind to rest no matter how hard he tried.
Letting out a sigh through his nose he looked up and leaned his head just a bit more roughly, yet intentionally, into the bark of the tree.
That sigh must've been just a decibel too loud when Tails's ears lowered and he began apologizing
"What are these apples about."
Though Nine couldn't care less about listening to pointless "sorries" while transfixed by the peculiar fruit hanging above him.
Tails perked up ever so slightly instead. "Well, without going too deep into the magical-mechanical aspect of them they're like, little fruits containing concentrated either positive or negative emotion, which is marked by their opposing colors. Though a better contrast would've been black and white, but can you imagine white apples?"
The kit was pointing towards the fruit hanging above them as he spoke with that was definitely an attempt to end a part of his spiel humorously, although Nine wouldn't say succeed.
"Their shared existence on one tree holds the balance in the emotions of everyone in this world, as far as I know."
Nine sure wasn't expecting a whole ass sudden info dump, but despite it, he sure had questions. He went to open his mouth, only for Tails to silence and answer his question immediately.
"You're not allowed to take or eat them though, since they're way too powerful and overwhelming for one person to hold and can be only lent for a while with our permission, since I and Dream are the tree's guardians and all that..."
With what great confidence Tails began to speak, slowly fizzled.
Nine let the remark of neither of them exactly doing their jobs die on his tongue, and instead, he decided to indulge the kit next to him, he was the one who started with the questions anyway.
"Can you eat them?"
"Well... we've never really tried. Besides, just holding the apple gives more or less the desired effect anyway. That leads to no one really caring for the negative side of the tree."
Tails trailed off again, deciding that the grass beneath him was super interesting and he needed to rip a few blades of it to closely examine them.
"And I was... born from it. Which is why you're so irritated right now."
Nine raised his eyebrow.
"So you knew...?"
"I can sort of weakly sense the emotions people around me are feeling. So yes. Doesn't help that being next to me only intensifies the negative ones though."
Tails was fully curled on himself at this point, hiding in the golden cape that would actually fit Sonic's vibe way more than Tails' but asking about that would either have the kit shrink even more or let him loose on another info dump.
"You're full of them though, even without my influence."
Nine simply chuckled in agreement at that.
"So with that logic, Dream has the exact opposite effect?"
Tails silently nodded.
"Fascinating."
Even so, Nine didn't mind getting to know more of this apple stuff. It's both an outlandish yet genuinely interesting concept if he says so himself.
Feeling a little less red string on a corkboard, Nine found himself curious still, mulling over random questions while Tails went on and on explaining them.
Their conversation leading to Nine explaining random robotics trivia that Tails followed up with his own limited knowledge and questions went back and forth. It let time flow on quite easy again, until they were interrupted by the sound of someone familiar huffing his way up the hill. With that, Nine was made aware of just how much time has passed when he looked at the dark orange to pinkish sky draped in a low sunset.
Soon enough, a dirt-covered Sonic holding a square bag to his shoulder, with his sleeves rolled up and gloves sticking out of his pant's pockets, greeted them energetically.
"Haha, glad to see you two getting along!"
The foxes waved back to him, and the hedgehog bent over leaning on his knees while struggling to catch his breath.
"Sorry for taking so long, Katheryne can really be a handful sometimes."
Regaining a bit of his strength, he took the two extra steps and stopped in front of Tails. He than brought the bag off his shoulder and immediately dug through it.
Sure enough, it was made clear the bag was a first aid kit — or at least what would be considered that for the times this universe lives in — when Sonic laid out a few bandages and tiny bottles with clear liquids. He covered the opening of one with a piece of clean white cloth while Tails put his hands out in protest.
"Sonic I'm fine don't worry about-"
"Shush no excuses, now show me your nose."
With great reluctance, Tails let the hedgehog hold his muzzle and wipe off the dried blood, before he moved on to the mud still staining the front plain of his face.
"It smells horrible."
Tails scrunched up his nose and physically tried to shake the aggressive scent off him while Sonic carefully rolled up one of his sleeves, revealing a bloodstained bandage that must've been a few days old already.
"I know bud, I know."
Nine watched them silently, unable to fight the sympathy that the fox kept garnering from him at this point.
Huh, if the emotion aura stuff is true it would only make sense the two being near each other would cancel out and make the area neutral.
Either way, the fact Sonic came prepared meant he was aware enough to know Tails keeps getting hurt when he's away, which made the relationship just a bit more confusing again.
"You didn't happen to ruffle each other up while I was gone have you?"
And of course, Nine would be the prime suspect for Tails gathering the new injuries that weren't there in the morning. He was bout to say what happened exactly, when he was hit with Tails' pleading eyes and the promise to keep his mouth shut.
"N-no worries big bro, I just fell off the tree because my cape got stuck in the branches, it's fine." Luckily, Tails seemed to have a mildly convincing excuse at the ready, and Sonic turned his full attention to wrapping the now-cleaned gash in his brother's arm.
"If anything he's super nice, did you know that there can exist machinery so advanced it can be programmed to flawlessly mimic biological beings?"
Sonic froze for a second, unsure of how to reply, while he rolled up the dirty bandage.
"That, huh. That sounds kinda scary actually. Is that a common thing for where you're from?" The guardian asked, turning his head towards Nine.
"Kind of not really? It's mostly just an outstanding feat of engineering that was achieved only a couple of times, so no need to worry."
He couldn't tell either of them who the replicas were based on now, could he?
The hedgehog merely nodded while Tails went on, either to distract himself from the sting in his arm or just because.
"Nine knows so much about machines, and he told me so many cool stories he got from traveling all over the place!"
"Huh, sure would love to go on an adventure like that someday." Sonic mused after carefully placing all of the supplies back into the medical bag.
"Well why don't you?"
Nine asked without hesitation, because if there was one thing he learned at this point, it was that Sonic cannot stay in one place for long. Even if you embed his legs into concrete, he'd either go insane or find a way out.
"We can't go anywhere, since we have to stay near the eyeshot of the tree to not let anyone get any funny ideas." Sonic sighed.
And that seemed to be true here, except the responsibility keeping Sonic tied down was something he couldn't run away from.
"Do you guys like, live here? Under the tree I mean."
"Hmm pretty much. Well in my very humble opinion it's much better than in a closed off hut built somewhere in a ditch."
Sonic threw the bag up and it's straps caught on a nearby branch. He tugged on it to make sure it will not slide down before climbing the tree himslef and stretching his hand out for Tails to grab on.
"It could do with something to keep the rain out though."
Tails commented and followed his brother up into the crown again, where he basically disappeared between the leaves.
"Sleeping on a tree can be hardly comfortable."
"Hah, says the one who sits on cold metal."
Sonic shot back with a finger gun pointed at Nine.
"Thermodynamics. The metal doesn't stay cold for long."
Sonic's attitude dropped a bit at the most likely unknown word to him but he brushed it off, finding the most comfortable branch to sit on, and leaned back on it. Maybe leaned back too much, as he toppled over and hung upside down from the branch like a bat.
"Thermowhatever's when wood is all you're used to sleeping on since birth it is more comfortable than a rigged bed."
"Agree to disagree."
"Mimimi."
Sonic mouthed back, but Nine didn't mind it much, banter with Sonic was fun.
"So you said you'd stay the night?"
Tails' disembodied voice was accompanied by an unnatural rustle of leaves.
"Most likely yea."
Suddenly the world went dark for Nine as suffocating weight was thrown over him. His temporary panic was intercepted by Tails' giggles and Sonic's tone that couldn't contain its humor properly either
"It gets cold at night, and I doubt anyone here would be willing to let a stranger inside their house at this hour. Not to be mean or anything, just safety for safety's sake y'know."
The sudden darkness turned out to be a yellow and navy blanket with sun and moon patterns. Nine assumed it to most likely be tailor made for them by the mentioned seamstress, but that was besides the point. The blanket was indeed a good insulator so it served its purpose.
"Thanks." Nine mumbled and somehow put the blanket over himself in a more comfortable manner. "Why do you go to sleep so early anyway?"
"And who told you we're going to sleep eh." Sonic swung himself back up into a proper sitting position, crossed his legs and rested his chin on his hand. "Again don't take it personally, but we can't leave the tree unsupervised, like, at all. Though I wouldn't mind if we could go on an adventure like you're on." Sonic sounded like someone elbowed him at the end of his sentence.
"So you're just gonna stay up the whole night instead."
"There's two of us for a reason duh."
He's gonna be kept under a night watch, how lovely.
Unfortunately, Nine knew it wouldn't be possible to enter deep sleep when someone's watching him, or is aware of his presence at all. He would of course give it a few minutes maybe an hour or two if he bears it, because he needs some rest at the end of the day, but he'll hardly make it till morning.
Feeling his head lulling to the side he shook himself awake. Opening his eyes, Nine turned towards his MTC with full intent of activating a portal and leaving without a trace, but the image of Tails with terrified eyes welled up in tears surfaced in his mind uninvited.
Nine exhaled with more force than needed.
He looked up, the hedgehog's leg dangled off a branch carelessly meaning that if either of the guardians fell asleep, it was Tails.
With great effort, Nine got up to his feet and flew the extra distance needed to be at eye level with the hedgehog.
He flicked Sonic's nose with full intent of breaking the promise he settled just a few hours back.
"Ow what the-"
Nine quickly covered the hedgehog's mouth and cursed himself for not thinking just one step ahead. Tails has to be unaware until Nine is already on his way, the consequences weren't his to deal with.
Sonic didn't take kindly to the gesture, unsurprisingly, and while mumbling curses, he grabbed the fox's hand in an attempt to shove it away.
Nine didn't budge though "Be quiet and meet me at the bottom of the hill. I just have something to tell you and I'll be out of your guys' fur, I promise."
Nine put as much urgency into his whisper as he could while keeping a finger to his mouth.
Sonic narrowed his eyes and looked over his shoulder at his sleeping brother, before sighing.
"You better not be playing me for a fool buddy."
But Nine was already halfway down the incline, not letting his legs suffer the way they did when going up, he elected to just glide down.
By all accounts the guardian finally caught up to him and exclaimed "Woa you can fly?!" after Nine landed.
The fox's eyes were fully concentrated on his MTC as he fiddled with the coordinates.
"Yes and by all accounts, Night should too."
"Wait what."
"He has two tails doesn't he?"
"Yes but I'm not sure those are exactly build for flying..."
Sonic scratched his head, while Nine was one confirm click from opening a portal.
"Now, I've been asked specifically to not tell you anything, but listen up."
He wasn't sure just how strong Sonic in this world was but if he was worth a damn, he'll do something to save his little brother.
#nine tailed travel guide through the multiverse#finally....after so long.....#this is the longest cohesive text Ive ever written and boy did I suffer#but!!! It was worth it!!!#please I hope you guys like it just as much as you do#i already have a little plan on where to take this au but i need a break#so I dont burn myself out right at the begining lmao#part 2 is like 50% done but that says literaly nothing cuz brain can always choose to forget it for years#i am finally making a pseudo dreamtale au look at me it only took five years#miles nine prower#nine the fox#sonic the hedgehog#miles tails prower#tails the fox#also the seamstress (a moth lady named Saturn) and carpenter's (an old dying I think human man named Oakley) are my friend's ocs I yoinked#their shops will be sort of relevant in the second part I prommy#dreamtale#over the hills#<- the name of the dreamtale au that spawned from this#me when I finish writing#dreamtale and sonic tomfoolery#sonic prime#me does arts
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thinking about how gojo does not understand personal space because he always his infinity on which also means in the last 10 years he's also probably never felt the warmth of human embrace and when he switched it off it was only before the shinjuku battle so that his students could cheer him up as he knew that would probably be the first and last time in a decade when he could touch a human without constantly being alert since the bigger battle/threat was already decided
#i am insane about this man do you get it. every thought that i have about anyone in jjk makes me want to punch myself#i wasn't even trying to think but this just popped up in my head & am like hello??? who asked??? if i suffer everyone suffers with me#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk spoilers#gojo satoru#jjk manga#jjk meta#jjk analysis#satoru gojo
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Type: One-Shot (First part- Drabble) {If you want things to make sense you probably should read it, the first part, 😁😁😁}
Pairing: Fem! Student! and Soulmate! Reader x Damian Wayne/Robin
AU: Soulmate! Reader
Content: Swearing, angst, teenage stupidity, aged up kiddos 16/17, technical talk about soulmates, lowkey frustrations, some much angst yall, some fluff, mythology, toxic parents, and soul crushing
Word Count: 7,233
(P.S: Okay so this is going to be continuing from the I Feel a Sin Coming On drabble, I've been getting a few comments on it asking for a part two and someone sent in a request for a Shy and Smart Student! Reader with Damian and let's just say the gears in my head started turning. Anyways this could go on if you guys want it to, but it could also end like this! It will break you. I hope you all enjoy! :D)
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While, unfortunately, it's true the somewhat cruel existence of soul mates was around and kicking, love- true love was still there. Or at least it was believed to be there. It supposedly thrived even more for some reason. Some speculated that it was because there was a standing of everyone deserving love. Whether they were good or bad or in-between, they got someone who would love them for the rest of their life regardless of all the mistakes they made or continue to make. Others said it was because the universe deemed people good enough to have someone for the rest of their lives. Which seems a little close minded for a society in which everyone has a soulmate. But maybe that was because of the belief that if things didn’t work out with your soulmate- if you didn’t love them as you should or didn’t get the love you thought you deserved- it was because you weren’t good enough. Weren’t good enough to get the right kind of love. But in the end soulmates do exist. They exist and are for everyone. For each person you pass on the road, there is someone out there for them. Just as there's someone out there for you.
But the daunting notion that you have to be the right kind of good to get your perfect love chilled you to the bone. After all, if it wasn’t perfect what did that say about you? Because in the end weren’t they made for you? Maybe that’s why some still believed in true love, that it was real. Both because of and not because of soulmates. Rather because of the concept. Someone made just for you. Even if that person was flawed-if you are flawed, just as they were made for you, you were made for them. But sometimes, what is made for you can harm you a lot more than what’s not.
It was why you believed that the reason true love might still exist was actually because some people fell for their soulmate before they realized they were fated to be. Before that dreaded bond-that agonizing pull kicked, of their own free will they fell in love. Because they didn't have to suffer through the pull of a bond they never wanted, these people were blissfully ignorant of what forced love was like. They did not know the horrors of those forced to stay with someone their heart loved but mind did not. And despite all your animosity towards soulmates, despite your fear and hatred, what made this all the worse-all the more ironic-was that you were technically one of those people.
Before you even knew what a soulmate was to you-before you were old enough to recognize the pull, to feel, it’s dark and fervent demand for attention-you fell for him. For his laugh: in the way he tilted his chin back as if trying to suppress its joyous sound and his smile: in the way the corners of his would curve showing a slight dimple in his left cheek and revealing the softness his eyes could have. For his kindness: in the way he disregarded what others said and lived his life freely as himself despite the demand of society for him to be like the rest-to be normal. For his mortality: in the way he would never allow bullies to pick on others around him, even if he thought they needed to toughen up. But most importantly for the way he tried each and every single day to learn more and be better even if you’re the only one who noticed. For the way he seemed to be all what you dreamed, something that should have caused you suspicion but instead drew you in.
That is until your 13th birthday and, much like many before you, you felt the tug of that dreaded bond.
You were six when you decided to loathe soulmates. Six when you swore on your very soul- your existence that you would never love your soulmate. You swore to live in misery of your own making rather than fates. No matter who they were, you would hate them.
But fate... well fate hated to be tested. So, fate did the worst thing it could. It made you fall for the one person you swore never to.
Your soulmate.
Your very own soulmate who seemed like the only light in the dark and suddenly you began questioning whether or not these feelings- these emotions you had thought were your own and genuine- were actually yours. Or if they were just fate pulling its strings and making you dance and dance and dance.
To say you were upset was an understatement and... well let's just say fate might be prideful, but you were twice as petty.
At age thirteen you shoved the emotions you had so dearly cherished so deep in your chest they seemed like nothing more than echoes of naive mind. You distanced yourself from him and only let yourself feel in your loneliest of moments.
Four years, it had nearly been four years since you had begun your battle against fate. And- and and fate was getting stronger... as you have been told. The older you get- the closer you are to your soulmate, the stronger the bond is.
Those moments... those lonely moments happened more often, and those stupid annoying emotions rose up with the beating of your traitorous heart.
Which is exactly how you ended up in the last place you ever wanted to be. Face to face with your soulmate... with them recognizing you and what you were to them.
"I'm your soulmate." Damian Fucking Wayne said his eyes locked on you as you felt your heart jump to your throat and all the color drain from your face.
"Fucking shit, " You whispered, unable to break his gaze.
Shaking-hand shaking and heart pounding at your rib cage demanding you acknowledge him-that you give in and tell him he’s right. That you are soulmates and let fate drive you. But there was something fate and your treasonous heart seemed to forget. You were one petty bitch.
Weakly smiling you let out a nervous laugh and turned, avoiding eye contact. Eyes darting around they finally settled on your bare wrist as your other hand scrambled to gather your things against your trembling chest.
"Oh- my,” Your voice cracked as you shoved your things into your bag, “would you look at the time! I need to get going."
Fingers racing over the items in your bag you went to zip it close and make your escape when your eyes rested on your final item. The book you were reading earlier. Which just so happened (damn you fate) to be right in front of Damian. Eyes raising to him, gazes latching for just a moment you did the one thing you should not. You looked down, down and back at your book before making the stupidly impulsive decision to lunge for it. Your fingers brushed the cover, nails barely scraping lines into it when a hand-warm and firm clasped around your wrist. Pulling you back towards the table in a quick tug that caused your stomach to slam against the tables side. Wincing you stabbed your nails into your palm, not daring to look up. You had fallen for his trap, the oh so obvious trap you could have avoided had you just not looked at him.
"I'm your soulmate," He said again, his voice clear and stanch as he gently pulled on your arm, clearly trying to get you to meet his eyes, "and you are mine."
Soulmate- God why did you have to care about him. Why- why-did it have to be him? Why-
why couldn’t fate just leave you alone?
Something about the tone of his voice made your heart shatter. It was almost desperate, but you couldn’t-you couldn’t allow yourself to be weak. After all, you would not let fate win. Petty- you were so violently petty and prideful- oh even fate knew this yet- it still tried... this- you wouldn't let this stand. You could-no would not allow fate to get away with even attempting this. Taking a breath in-a deep breath- you raised your chin. Steadying your mind with the thoughts of your parents, of how you needed to be around them. Calm, poised, emotionless. Ignoring the well of tears in your throat and the pressure behind your eyes you finally met his gaze.
Green. All you could see was those beautiful green eyes, wide and desperate. Yearning-yearning for you to give a reply. But the one you were about to give would only hurt those eyes, regardless, it needed to be done. One pain- one moment or time of pain and sorrow was far better than a life of them.
Slowly letting out the breaths you previously let in you tilted your head, feeling his grip on your wrist lightening.
“I do not have a soulmate," You began instantly seeing the surprise on his face-the confusion, so you continued, “I won’t have one. Not you. Not anyone. You see, I don't believe in soulmates. So, I do believe you are mistaken.”
His grip dropped but seeing the broken look on his face made your facade crumble in an instant as your heart screamed to stop. To comfort him. To take back your words and press yourself into his arms. But you were smarter than that, even if you weren’t strong enough to hide the tears anymore. Throat bobbing, you felt your mouth tremble as your eyes stung and something warm began spilling down your cheeks.
Pulling yourself away from him, you smiled a bitter smile, not even daring to acknowledge the tears you were shedding. Head high, you turned.
Voice cracking, you bid farewell, “Now, if you excuse me, I have to get going.”
Feet scrambling you nearly dashed out the door, leaving the book that got you into this mess behind. After all, it was now only going to hold harish and painful memories.
As soon as your feet touched the gravel, you ran. Tears freely spilled down your cheeks and you sobbed and panted. Mind trying it’s best to soothe the heart that had just torn itself into pieces. But there was nothing it could do. There was nothing you could do but cry and run. Run away from him. From all the pain you had and were going to feel. It was hell, yes. But at least it was yours. At least you knew how and why it had happened, at least you knew what was to come. At least you were still you right?
By the time you had finally calmed your tears-though your heart was still howling, you had made it home. Wiping your tears you took a deep breath in and held it, hoping it would steady your mind and breathing enough to face what was about to come. You hesitated for a moment, then let the breath out wiped your face again and walked up to the door. It was then you heard the shouting. The rage filled voices cursing at each other, dishes and shoes flying, shattering and knocking things about.
Hand trembling you pushed down the doorknob and walked in. The barrage of insults and dissonance of things being thrown slammed into you. Your feet shuffled across the floor as you saw the shadows in the kitchen, too caught up in their most recent argument to even acknowledge your existence-that is until they came into view.
“God you never listen!” Your father roared
“Better than sitting on my ass doing nothing all day!” Your mother countered
Quivering you slowly moved towards the staircase as their fight pushed into the living room. Your father’s hands waved as your mother rolled her eyes at him, arms crossed.
“Really that’s how you’re gonna be?”
“Yeah it is.”
“Fine then, I’ll just take this lazy ass of mine and leave!”
“GOOD!”
With that your father turned and stormed past you straight out the door, slamming it behind him. You flinched and turned to see your mother staring at you.
“Ugh! I can’t believe him,” She hissed before she shook her head, scowling, “absentee father, sitting on his ass all day while I make the money and take care of the needless kid. God, pregnant at 18- now married to that loser! My life went down the drain. If only it weren't for you...”
Those words stabbed at your heart, sinking in their little daggers in the spots they knew best. You knew she didn’t mean for you to hear them, but you always did. It wasn’t the first time you had heard things like this, but it did seem to hurt all the more due to what happened earlier this afternoon. Sniffing slightly, you lowered your head and your voice cracking as you had to fight off more tears whimpered,
“I’m sorry mom.”
As if a flip switched your mom’s brown furrowed and scowl dropped. She looked you over, concern in her eyes and she took a step forward.
“Are you okay honey? You don’t sound too good.”
Raising your head you tightly smiled and nodded, “Of course, just stressed cuz of school. I’ve got some exams coming up and it’s causing my emotions to be all over the place.”
She nodded eyes raving over you, resentment heavy in them as she plopped onto the couch with sigh, “Okay, you better be doing good in school alright? Don't want you to end up like that louse of man your father is.”
You nodded again, “Of course! Actually I was about to go and study.”
“Good, you do that.” She replied as she picked up the remote and flipped on the T.V.
You paused, for just a moment watching her as the resentment began to slide from her eyes, her face softening. She was so pretty, yet harsh lines from constant scowls and frowns bore their way onto her cheeks. Line surrounded her eyes from the tears and sleepless nights. And it was all because of you. Turning, your hands tight on your bag, you raced up the stairs, dashing towards your room where you collapsed onto the ground the second the door was closed. Hand against your face you pressed your head against the door and bit your lip. You did not have the luxury of more tears.
Turning you found yourself looking at your own reflection. The combination of your mother and father. The perfect combination. It made you wonder what they saw when they looked at you. Did they see a reflection of themselves? Or just an echo of the person they loathed to love. You knew for a fact they never saw you, just you. It was always tied with one or the other. You could tell because today your mother avoided your eyes, that was because you had your father’s eyes. So today, she must have seen him in you. At least until your hair covered your face-her hair- and she saw herself. Maybe that’s why she softened; you didn’t truly know. They loved you, yes. But only because they saw themselves in you. Because on the good days, they saw each other. Because in a way you were them. What hurt the most though, was not when they saw each other or themselves in you. But the fact that they would never see you. And if your parents, the people who were supposed to love you the most, the people who brought you into this world could never see you, who could?
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It had nearly been a week since you last saw and denied being soulmates with Damian Wayne. In said period you spent your free time dodging Damian and all his friends as well as digging your nose into every soulmate lore, history or origin you could find. While you didn’t want a soulmate, that didn’t mean Da- you soulmate should suffer because of it. So, you had made it your mission to discover if there was any way you could break the bond now. Research had told you that if one party ignored the bond for long enough it would fade for the other. But you didn’t know how long that would take and merely telling Damian you weren’t soulmates tore you up so badly that the mere sight of him sends you into tears. Therefore, you needed to find a way to break the bond. Both for yourself and for Damian.
But as far as you could tell it was impossible. Every single myth, origin and lore of soulmates explained them as the other half of each other, inseparable even incomplete without the other. Part of you hated that thought. That you were incomplete without your soulmate. Because weren’t you a person, able to function live, laugh and love all on your own? Without a soulmate? Only Greek mythology even considers you as whole without your soulmate. Though it does say that they are meant to be together and once they meet they will not want to part. Which did not read well for your plans. In Chinese mythology there was the Red String or Red Thread of Fate
A tangible string, perhaps it was something that could be broken. But from what you read it could not, at least you could not cut it or tear it with your hands. It cannot be broken. It cannot be broken. It can-
Taking a deep breath in, you rubbed your brow. It didn’t really make sense to you that the string or thread or whatever it was couldn’t be broken. It also didn’t make sense that a soulmate was to be bound to you for life. Logically speaking there had to be a loophole. Afterall no one feels their bond until they are thirteen. If you were truly bound for life, you would always feel it. Therefore, there must be a workaround. A way to break the bond or someone- or someone to break it- to remove it.
Since it is not there from the beginning it cannot be like in the Greek, Jewish or Hindu myths. But it might be connected to that string of fate theory. And there was one person who you could think of that might be able to remove or break the bond. The very person who put it there. And if the Chinese myth is right it’s Yuè Xià Lăorén or Yuè Lăo. But as far as you could tell no one was meeting old men at night right before their thirteenth birthday.
It felt like a lost cause. You doubted anyone actually ever seriously tried to break their soulmate bond. No one ever seemed to have your determination or rather stubbornness. Most people would have surely given up by now, but you desperately needed a way. Because despite how much you hated it, how much it made you hate yourself. You couldn’t help but love him. And it terrified you.
Your parents started out in love and now they were-... it’d be difficult to say what they had was anything other than torture. Day in day out fighting. Yelling and screaming. Shouting. Such anger at someone they were supposed to love. It made you wonder, were they really in love? Were they really supposed to be each other's happy ever after? Each other's eternity? If so, what did that mean for you? Did that mean you were doomed to be stuck in the same cycle of love turning to hate? Did that mean that you were going to lose a love you always told you had? Did that mean that you were going to die unloved? It was a fear- your biggest if you were being honest. That the person who was supposed to love you forever, doesn’t really love you. And you could take the chance. Not with what you knew- what you’d seen. There was no way in hell you were ever going to let that happen.
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
It was truly unfortunate that you just so happened to have a mother deeply involved in her job. One that resulted in her dragging you to a gala because she needed to show she had the perfect little family. What a joke. A cosmic joke as said gala was happening at none other than Wayne manor. And its host? You guessed it, Bruce Wayne himself with his gaggle of children all in attendance. How did you know this? Well, your eye caught one of the many children. The one you were trying your hardest to avoid.
Damian Mother Fucking Waye.
And it seems you caught his eye as well, because the second he looked in your direction his face lit up. That is until you turned away from him, the next you saw the color drained from his face and he practically stormed out of the room. Though any random bystander would have thought he calmly exited, you knew better. Which was valid considering you had basically spit in his face and said he wasn’t good enough. But it still hurts. Nowadays it seems that everything hurts. Though it was all probably due to the bond you were so determined to reject.
So, to dull the pain you clung to the walls of the ballroom. Heavily nursing the glass of champagne you snagged from an unassuming waiter. It had been probably close to two hours since you arrived and you hadn’t even gotten halfway through it, however you most definitely did not want your parents to see. You were underaged and they wanted to keep their ‘perfect’ image intact. Which is partially the reason why when the people began to make their rounds around the ballroom, you decided to slip out. Though you abandon your drink, you thought wandering around the manor’s halls might help you relax even if it was only a little bit.
Wandering down the darkened corridors you listened to the faint music that trailed after you as you got further and further away from the ballroom. Night encompassing each hallway you turned down it wasn’t long till the sounds of the strings playing was nothing more than a faint humming like the buzz of a fly. Darkness and silence swallowed the area-well near silence. The creaking and settling of the manor seemed to be the only sound. That is until you hear a clattering and an all too familiar voice cursing in another language.
Maybe, it was due to the slight buzz those sips of champagne gave you-maybe it was the exhaustion from the days of fighting off your feelings-or maybe it was because the pull was just too strong; you walked towards the sound and pushed a door open to find a disheveled Damian Wayne sitting in on a couch, a bottle of whisky clutched in his hands, a crystal glass at his feet with half melted ice cubes surrounding it.
He did not seem to notice your presence, so you slowly began to venture closer. Noticing his messy hair, unbuttoned shirt and missing tie. Why did he have to look so damn beautiful? Better hearing his mutterings which were half in English, you pause to listen.
“Seems like Todd was correct,” He mumbled as a hiccup stalled his sentence, “this does improve everything… or perhaps not.”
His body shifted as he hiccuped again, and had you not seen it yourself you would not have believed that the high pitched sound came from him. It almost made you laugh, but you were able to restrain yourself and move closer. This time, it seems Damian heard you as his head snapped in your direction. He blinked a few times almost as if he was trying to get water from his eyes. Head tilting he narrowed his gaze, voice slurring as he asked, “Y/N?”
Sighing you nodded and walked even closer until you stood in front of him. Smiling slightly you waved and took a deep breath in before replying, “Hi Damian.”
He blinked more, brow furrowing as he muttered something you could not catch. Sinking deeper into the couch he gave you a blank look.
“So have you come to inform me of our ‘non-existent bond’? Because I assure you if you do not wish to discuss it with me I will leave it alone.”
You raised an eyebrow and crouched so you could be eye level with him. Meeting his eyes you found yourself once again admiring their beauty.
“Really? Then thank you. I appreciate that.” You paused concern stirring so strongly in your chest you couldn’t help but let the worry take hold, “ But I’m not here for that.”
Damian sat up glaring at you and you did not move, swallowing as he got a bit closer.
“Then what are you here for?”
“I’m worried about you.”
As if it was instinctual, he replied, “And who's fault is that.”
Though he winced afterwards despite you merely sighing at his comment. Resting your chin on your knees you gave him a sad smile and nodded.
“You’re right… I owe you an explanation.”
Heart in your throat you met his eyes again and asked, “Would you let me give you one?”
Silence thrummed between the two of you for a lot longer than you would have liked. His gaze not leaving your face as you took a deep breath in and let it out. You should have done this from the start and at the very least if things go awry he probably won't remember any of this.
His hand gesturing to the place next to him he said, “Sit.”
You snorted and rose to your feet. Then the seat next to him shifted a bit awkwardly before you turned to him. He looked at you out of the corner of his eyes as he took another swig from the bottle. It stung far more than you would ever admit seeing him like this. But- but it would fade. It will fade. He won’t be like this forever. He won’t.
“So… I should probably tell you why I don’t believe in soulmates.”
He grunted in reply, and you weakly laughed, “I-hmm… this is rather hard to explain. You see my parents are soulmates and they-”
You stopped yourself, watching as he stared across the room. Realizing that telling him about this was letting him in. And you could not let him in. Biting your lip you swallowed, squeezing your eyes shut as you once again fought off tears.
“I really don’t like their relationship. I hate it. And and to me it seems everyone with a soulmate is miserable. They aren’t happy. Shouting, arguing, fighting. I will not risk the chance of being like my parents. I refuse.”
He was looking at you now. Brow furrowed and the bottle slipped between his fingers. Your voice cracked and you winced, swallowing as you shrugged.
“I- i am a coward. I refuse to take any chances because I don’t want to get hurt.”
The unspoken ever again hung on your lips as your parents' rage flashed through your mind. Fingers picking at one another you looked down. Unable to keep eye contact without crying.
“I’m scared and- and worried and and I- I’m so sorry. You deserve better and i-”
His hand was over your mouth and you blinked in confusion looking up to see him pinching his nose, bottle still in hand.
“Please silence your excuses.” Damian snapped, “I will not hear anyone talk about you that way.”
Something jolted in you and you froze, tears springing to your eyes, you nodded and he removed his hand. Fingers darting to wipe away tears you began to turn from him. His hand batted your fingers away and cupped one of your cheeks. The other still clutching the whiskey bottle half cupped the other. Damian pressed his forehead against yours and looked you in the eyes.
“I care not that you are a coward. I care not that you are running away. I understand your unease, I understand your logic. But I disagree. I can do no better than you, my soulmate. My other half. I will be here for you and will ease your fears, I will drive your worries away and treat your scars. Emotional or otherwise. I am here for you. I do not know what I have to do for you to understand I am yours. Whole and solely yours. As you are mine. Please- I beg you. Tell me what I must do for you to allow me to love you to my fullest capacity.”
Unable to look away, your heart taking control as that bitter bond turned soft and sweet you began to cry. Tears spilling down your face, you pressed your forehead more against his, words slipping from you before you could even think.
“Be forever mine and let me be forever yours,” You whispered.
Something softened in his eyes, a warmth in them you desperately wanted to see but hoped you never did. He began to lean in a slight smile tugging at the corners of his mouth as his hands shifted, the bottle falling from his grasps as he muttered,
“Was that ever in doubt?”
You tilted your head and his lips pressed against yours. He tasted of bitterness, a darkness that burned so sharply it had you clinging to him. Hands bunched in the cloth of his shirt you found yourself leaning in. His arm wrapped around your waist and as he pulled you in tighter, body shifting as he couldn’t get you close enough. As if there wasn’t a way to hold you where he was near enough. It was as if he wanted to shift-sinking-melting completely and totally into you.
Air, you had no air left, but who needed air? He was here. His touch gentle and constant, reassuring as he pressed against you, gripping you as if he was terrified the second he let you go, you would disappear. And he was right.
You broke apart both gasping for air and his grip loosened. Foreheads pressed against each other he smiled, a smile that sent your already raging heart racing. His hand rested against your cheek, fingers playing with your hair. Squeezing his eyes shut he muttered,
“I love you.”
Your heart skittered and-
Tug, there was a tug a mother fucking tug that made your whole-body ache. One that stole the air you had just barely regained. One that sent shivers up your spine and knocked some sense into you.
You couldn’t breathe. Standing up suddenly, your head spun. Blinking a few times as tears sprang into your eyes you shook your head.
“I’m sorry,” You whispered, “I'm sorry, I’m sorry.”
And with that, you bolted from the room. Faintly hearing Damian calling after you, you rush down the hall brushing past a butler whose name you think is Alfred. He gives you a soft smile and you nod, quickly wiping away the tears. He paused but you kept moving. You had to get out of here. You had to get out of here now. No matter what it took.
Feet nearly tripping over the other you stumbled back into the ballroom. There would be hell to pay later, you knew it. But if you stayed any longer you could get hurt beyond repair. Allowing the feeling of everything that had just occurred loose, you promptly burst into tears as you stumbled towards your stunned parents. Your mother frantically moved to you as your father’s eyes widened and he began speaking to the people before them.
“Y/N, Y/N honey we’re in front of a lot of people. Can this wait?” Your mother whispered as she got closer.
Sniffling you collapsed into your mother’s arms, feeling her embrace again for the first time in nearly a decade. Trembling as sobs escaped you, you were able to get out.
“I want to go home. Please. Please. Let me go home.”
At first, she didn’t reply, then she began moving you towards the door.
“Alright. Alright. Let’s get you home.”
She did not even turn in your father’s direction. After all, they had done what they always do, taken separate cars. Unable to quell the tears, you let your mother guide you out the door before he came to pull you back into fate’s vicious plot.
_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~
Two days, you hadn’t left your room in two days. Not that your parents had noticed, not that anyone really did. You doubted anyone noticed your absences from class. You hoped no one would notice truthfully. You couldn’t bear the thought of seeing his face again. It was driving you crazy. So you locked yourself in your room and hoped-prayed-that these growing feelings would just die. Or maybe you could just die. That sounded like a solid solution as well. It was part of the reason why despite the late hour, despite living in Gotham you had unlocked and opened your window.
There was a sound that awoke you, yanking you from the nightmares that never seemed to cease. And as you opened your eyes to the familiar shapes and silhouettes in your room you found one that did not belong there.
"Who are you?" You whispered to the woman hiding in the shadows, not really caring if acknowledging her would lead her to strike.
After all, who would lurk in the shadows of someone's room while they were sleeping unless you planned to kill them. It was a relief of sorts, that you were more than likely going to die soon. It would help you feel less guilt about Damian, about the situation that occurred a few nights before and the feelings that refused to listen to reason.
Stepping into the moonlight the woman towered before you. Half her face tilted towards the light and you blinked twice almost recognizing it- but- but that couldn't be possible. There was no way you knew this woman. You hardly knew anyone, let alone an murder or assassin who would sneak into sleeping peoples rooms.
"You don't have to worry about that.” She replied in a soft voice, her accent reminding you of something-something…something!
You just couldn’t quite place your finger on what though. It nagged and nipped at your mind, tugging and swirling in faint recognition you could not connect.
The woman took a step forward, her black hair swaying as she crossed her arms, her tone sharp and barbed, “I think who you are is a more important question.”
Her gaze did not leave you and you adjusted your blanket before glancing towards the open window almost blankly saying,
"Nobody special I can assure you."
This caused the woman’s posture to relax a little. She hummed slightly as you crossed your legs and set your elbows on your knees.
"Hmm, really?"
Nodding you rested your face in your hands as you looked at her shadowy figure. She seemed kind, in a way. She was at least talking to you before killing you. That was something was it not?
"Just the byproduct of fate's meddling and destructive hands."
"Ah, your parents are soulmates?' Her stance relaxed even more and you noted how from what you could see her outfit was nothing like the things the Gotham vigilantes wore.
"Unwilling but yes, soulmates."
It was more of a snort than a reply, but it didn’t seem to phase the woman as she rested herself on your desk the moon light allowing you to see the curve of her jaw and shape of her nose. Familiar features that made your gut churn.
"Oh, oh. I see. They did not choose-"
"To have me?” You interrupted with a sigh, shrugging you nodded, “I guess you could say that."
Silence followed and you saw the woman’s eyes narrow. She crossed her arms again, stance tightening.
"... you do not seem the type to share your innermost troubles with a stranger, why are you talking to me?"
Pulling your face from your hands you gave her a shrug as a yawn slipped from your lips, "Well, for one I think you're here to kill me and two... I've needed to tell someone for a while. Why not a perfect stranger?"
"Your parent's fate troubles you that much?" Her voice seemed to begin carrying concern, which only troubled you because it made you think there would be a possibility she wouldn’t kill you.
"They are living proof- hell I am living proof that soulmates shouldn't be forced together…” You paused crossing your arms with a scowl, “and because fate is cruel, I have a soulmate too. Despite how awful they are."
"Your soulmate is awful?"
Something in her tone said she did not believe what she was asking in the slightest. Which was true, yet it still caused that buzzing familiarity to ring just a bit louder.
"n-no, he's not.”
Squeezing your eyes shut you sighed deeply, running your hands along your face, “ He's kind and- and all I could ask for but- but... how do I know he's all I want? How do I know any of this- any of my feelings are mine? How do I know that it isn't fate pulling my strings and wanting me to dance? How do I know he won’t leave? That the bond will only become apparent when we fight and won’t exist otherwise? When the love is gone and only the bond remains? How will I know that I won’t be abandoned again? That I won't be hurt again? That I will gain a love that will last? I won’t. Not to mention even if I didn't like him... I would have to be with him."
"No,” The woman scoffed, “you wouldn't, dear."
"Yes, I would. My parents- they tried and now- now I live in the shambles of a home. They are together because of that damned bond even though they hate each other." You were crying now, of course you were, "fate does not like to be ignored and I don't like to be told what to do."
Angrily grabbing a tissue you blew your nose, faintly hearing the woman laugh. From what you could see, she had a look in her eyes that seemed soft- understanding. One you most certainly did not expect your killer to have.
"Oh my, really?" She mumbled head turned towards the window.
"Yes! I'd rather live in a hell I have control of, a hell I made rather than one fate forced upon me. If- if I ignore it enough... I heard it will fade for him, I- I will still feel it but- but because he tried, he will be spared. He'll have a chance- one I never had. And though- though I can't truly tell if these feelings are mine, it's all I want. I love him. I love him”
You stopped yourself trembling as you said it yet again, “I love him.”
Nodding you continued on, “and… I want him to be happy without me. Because- because I won't give way to fate, not even for him."
"Hmmm. I have a question for you.”
“Yes?” You pulled the tissue box closer to you sure more tears would come.
“Do you really want to die?”
“Excuse me?”
The woman shrugged, waving a hand, “It’s just, it hardly seems to me that you want to die. Rather it seems like you want to live.”
"What- I, I’m sorry I-." You were at a loss for words.
She was smiling as she replied with a shrug, “You have told me of a cause you wish to live for, no? To fight against the soulmate bond. While I personally disagree with your choice, I hardly think dying will do anything other than let the bond win.”
“Wha-... I-,” You sputtered, mainly because what she said made sense.
It made an insane amount of sense. So much so that it had your head spinning. Why exactly did you think dying was the best option? You may not have the best life, but it was yours right?
“I’m-I’m sorry.” The whisper escaped not entirely directed at the woman but rather just as a declaration in general.
The tears on your face felt silly and you blew your nose again as the woman sighed. Causing silence to spin about the room until she remarked,
"I believe I should be the one apologizing."
You laughed, wiping the tears from your face, "Why?"
"Because I'm not here to kill you."
Something in you skipped a beat and you shook your head. Of course she isn’t. Who would want you dead after all. You hadn’t done anything that would cause a reason to be killed.
"Oh darn." You snorted, rubbing the back of your hand across your face, "Here I am looking like a fool asking for something I don’t even want from someone who can’t even give it to me. Fate is cruel… Though life does seem crueler."
"Yes," She muttered looking over her shoulder at the window, "indeed it is."
A figure loomed where she looked, a familiar figure in green, yellow and red. The woman smiled at you again and she moved towards him patting him on the shoulder before climbing out the window.
“It was nice to meet you Y/N.”
Blinking in confusion you latched onto the vigilante who was now looming in between your room and the outside, "Robin? What are you doing here?"
He sighed, the woman disappearing as he rested on the window frame, "I am afraid it is quite difficult for me to explain at the moment."
"Wha-.... wait-wait."
In the silence of the night, with the slight breeze trailing in from the window where Robin was perched, you felt a tug. A heart wrenching tug you had felt just the other night. A tug that sent aches all over and made your throat tighten.
"...you're-oh."
Biting, you lip you fought off tears as he slowly entered your room. Breathing deeply, you began picking at your fingers before you finally found the courage to look him in the eyes.
He was right in front of you as tears spilled down your cheeks and through sharp stabs of pain you tightly smiled remarking,
"...hi Damian."
He was silent and you bit down harder, weakly you took in a breath. His voice was soft in reply,
"Y/N... are you- are you alright?"
You didn't know what to say. After all, he must have heard something... then again, he might not have but-
"How-" Your voice cracked as you avoided looking at him despite him being so close, but it was hard as you could feel the heat from his body, "how much... How much did you hear?"
His was quiet and you squeezed your eyes shut, heart dropping as you tasted blood. Pain dancing across your lips and air fighting to leave you. A tiny sob escaped you and you took a ragged breath in as you opened your eyes facing him. Rob-no Damian raised a hand and brushed it against your face before he leaned in. His lips almost pressed against your ear he said,
"I heard everything."
Tag List: @andromedaj2003 @thomasbeloved @instabull @zvtanna @daemonnix96 @neon-scenery @ssak-i @achromaticerebus @1lellykins @hyperfixiation-station @legendarylearner18
#batboys#y/n#batfam#reader#damian wayne#batboys x y/n#damian wayne x reader#technically part 2#i just wanted to give it a new name#feeling evil evil evil#deal with it <3#Enjoy the suffering yall :D#robin x reader#robin#soulmates! au#soulmate!reader#y/n x damian wayne#damian wayne x y/n#reader x damian wayne#requests#robin x y/n#the angst is so strong#my brain went *doopdeedoop* everyone needs to cry#hehehehehehehehehe#very very proud if i do say so myself#writing upgrade#baby fluff#technical cliff hanger#I hope u get mad at me#itd make my day
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NO OK BUT I'M STILL NOT OVER BOOTHILL AND DAN HENG AND THE JADE ABACUS IN ENA'S DREAM!!!!!
For some extra context, I have a whole henghill manifesto I wrote over here, but the tl;dr is that Dan Heng decides to use the Jade Abacus of Allying Oath to save the Express Crew the first time. Boothill urges him to think it over carefully, but he doesn't stop him. And then, the second time Dan Heng decides to use it, we get this instead:
And just! That's so!! so!!!
Because like. We see in the first battle against Sunday that that Jade Abacus is effective, like we really do just get an entire army lead by a whole-ass Emanator of The Hunt right to our location and ready to fuck shit up. It's important. It's incredibly valuable. That is a huge amount of power to hold in the palm of one's hand.
But Tiernan's relic works the same way.
Galaxy Rangers are terribly dangerous. Boothill comments on this when discussing Acheron's motives, because he can't believe anyone would be stupid enough to get The Hunt on their asses. They're considered to be on a level even above The Annihilation Gang.
And now, with the burial relic, he has a way to get thousands of them, almost immediately, and all in one place.
And you can't tell me that wouldn't be something extremely useful to Boothill, like literally life-saving. He's wanted by the IPC. He makes his living as a bounty hunter. His whole driving motivation in life right now is to do whatever he can, up to and including throwing away his own human body, to ruthlessly hunt down one man and kill him in revenge. Like that has to be dangerous, the IPC is a massive entity with far-reaching influence and money and power and weaponry. He surely must have already had some close calls.
Like can you imagine it? Galaxy Rangers are solitary creatures. If Boothill were to find himself near death, he would probably be all alone. Do you think he had regrets? Did he wonder if anyone would find his own burial relic? Did it feel the same way it did when they melted his flesh, replaced it with metal? Did he lay there with his vision slowly blacking out until he thought of home, and family, and the little daughter who he never even got to hear her first word, until he was so full of fury that he could prop himself up on his rage like a crutch and find help?
Tiernan's relic would have been like a get-out-of-jail-free card. Just for one time, no matter where Boothill was, someone would find him. The Galaxy Rangers aren't sociable or organized between themselves, but they help their own. Someone would save him.
He chooses to give all of that up to help Dan Heng.
And I just cannot get over it, especially the wording of it, the pause before he speaks, the gentle way he tells him to hold onto his once-in-a-lifetime treasure...!! He wants Dan Heng to leave this to him! He wants him to keep this precious item that will help him save his companions again in the future! And maybe it's just...wishful thinking, me reading too much into it? But I mean. Just the way he says it...
I really do think it comes from a place of deep kinship and respect. That there's a lot of thought and feeling behind that statement. Something from one Pathstrider of The Hunt to another. Boothill fought for his home and his family, he fought really really hard! But. Sometimes that just doesn't matter. And now he's watching Dan Heng fight for his, too.
When he made that decision the first time, Dan Heng was in the parlor car of the Astral Express. He was completely removed from any danger. He could have chosen to get the hell out of Dodge and not look back. Obviously we know he would never even consider such a thing, but it was technically an option, and Boothill watched him decide to go back into the proverbial lion's den for his friends anyway. And I'm sure that was part of what sealed his decision, to later use Tiernan's relic instead of the Jade Abacus to summon enough people to disrupt Ena's Dream. Because he greatly values ideas like righteousness and justice and saving people, and Dan Heng so beautifully embodies all of that and then some.
Boothill doesn't have people to protect anymore, only ghosts to avenge.
And there is just something so endlessly endearing about him wanting to help Dan Heng, to make sure his friend doesn't go through that the way he did.
#honkai star rail#henghill#boothill#dan heng#hsr#hsr boothill#hsr dan heng#bootheng#I feel like I'm just repeating myself a bunch and not saying anything orz#spinning my tires#do you get me. do you feel me.#do you understand my vision#does the blood in your mouth taste the same as mine.#I'm frothing at the mouth over here Hoyo how dare you get me so into a ship OTL#there are few things that get me in the heart so hard as 'character loses everything and uses it to make sure no one else goes through that#just#ARGH#Because Dan Heng has suffered so much in his life but it's never been this specific kind of loss.#He never had any kind of family to lose in the first place. He didn't until Himeko took him in.#But Boothill has been through all that and it sucked and he already really likes and relates to Dan Heng.#they're like two goofy little peas in a pod haha#so of course he wants to protect him#How could his heart not be swayed by him?
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rainbowfish [sebpaint] sickfic but painter just has 578 computer viruses and his CPU is overheating horribly so Sebastian has to fix it all
#doomed yaoi with painter and sebastian is my roman empire#sebastian x painter#sebpainter#painter pressure#p.ai.nter pressure#sebastian pressure#roblox pressure#sebastian solace#sebastian and painter sickfic but painter just has 578 computer viruses#sickfic#fanfiction#im gonna write this#someone explode these queers for me#i need them to kiss#i need them to be happy#i need them to explode#i need them to be canon#rainbowfish [not the book]#hope painter implodes/aff/lh#IM GONNA K WORD MYSELF#slash jay ↑#heavy /j#they make me sick#they make me insane#they make me ill#they make me so happy#they make me want to eat glass#they make me want to send a bomb to urbanshade#curse the devs for that stupid AI slop badge#if i never found it i wouldn't be like this. curse them for bringing me SUFFERING. GAH !!
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