#It’s lowkey inspiring me to write that essay I said I would write about on Shipwrecked 64 if I’m being honest—

[withmytailtotheworld]

this god dam game man…….. this game.

[excelsior9173]

so i have to take an english course at my uni to be eligible for nursing (not sure what being able to read or write dramas or poetry has to do with being a nurse but 🤷‍♀️) and i am lowkey panicking about it

not only do i need an english, i have to do well in it too. my grades from the 10 required “pre-professional” courses are what my admission to nursing hinges on

and i am the worst writer ever. i struggle to express myself with words and honestly if there’s no inspiration then i am unable to write anything. all of my previous university essays were written either by forcing myself through an excruciating process of “i hate this but have no other option to write about” or they were written in near-manic frenzies because i had too much to say about my chosen topic. there is no in between

i have a friend with an english degree who said she’d help me through it. but she’d be most useful if i take the dramas class, but not gonna lie i’m more intrigued by the narratives. just because it would mean studying books that i tend to gravitate towards when reading. still anxious as hell about the composition part though… i truly have no desire to be a writer in any capacity lol

[toomuchracket]

Omg I would LOVE to read about that. I feel like matty would be a little annoyed people loved girly but he’d still be so proud and he can’t be that agitated

i don't think he'd be annoyed per se, but he'd get so cutely grumpy about people repeatedly coming up to you for pics and autographs while you guys are out on dates, very "god, babe, can't they see i'm trying to romance you here?" lol (and then he'd be like "wait a min this is how you must feel with me. i'm sorry :((" lmao). but mostly, i think he's just a proud boyf. and i think he was with you for two really memorable fan interactions, one being the very first time you met someone with a quote from your work tattooed. the two of you were at a train station, and you could see a young woman a bit further down the platform visibly debate whether to come up to you and matty or not; you figured she was a 75 fan, so you just kinda smiled and said hi when she eventually introduced herself, and you were lowkey really shocked when she spoke to you like "i just wanted to say that i'm a huge fan - your last essay collection changed my life". you were like "wait you're a fan of ME?! that's so lovely lol i never really tend to meet people in public like this" (matty was also kinda surprised but so proud he genuinely couldn't stop smiling), and the girl was like "yeah! i have one of your quotes tattooed and everything!" and pulled up her sleeve to show you your words inked on her inner arm - your jaw dropped and you were like "no fucking way. this is so surreal. i'm so touched that you would do that!" and gave her a hug, and matty still just grinned along like "i could take a pic of the two of you if you want?", all proud boyfriend. he did, then the three of you took a selfie (the girl was like "i do actually love your band too, matty, i just stan your girl more lol") before the girl thanked you and left, with an "eagerly awaiting a writing collab between the two of you, btw", which you both laughed at at first and then seriously considered while you were on the train.

the second big interaction was while you were on a weekend break in edinburgh, and you dragged matty to rare birds bookshop (google it btw it's so cool) to do some shopping. even the staff getting excited when you came in and gratefully accepting your offer to sign some copies of your books was a huge deal for you (matty was like "it's adorable how genuinely surprised you still get at these kind of interactions. people love you, babe! taste"), but it got even better - while you and matty were browsing in the other room (well, you were browsing, and he was patiently carrying the stack the two of you had already picked out and smiling at how content you were), you heard a voice from the next room ask the staff if they had a copy of your newest book. you beamed excitedly at matty (smiling just as hard back at you), before you poked your head into the other room and jokingly said "hmm, that one's a bit crap, to be honest. the previous one is a lot better"; the heads of about five sixteen-year-old girls whipped round and all reacted in total shock, gasps, laughs, even tears from one of them as she clocked you. naturally, you ran over like "oh my god, are you alright? please don't cry" and this wee girl was like "i'm sorry i just love you so much omg this is so crazy", which actually made you tear up a bit like "you're so sweet, but really i'm just a girl! like you! not worth crying over, honestly" and give her a big hug (which made her cry harder lol). matty let you bejeweled have your moment, just stayed in the other room watching with a big smile on his face and filming a little bit of the interaction because he found it so endearing (and also so he could make a fancam of you for your bday <3), looking lovingly as you took the time to chat to the girls and personalise the autographs on the title page of each copy they'd picked up, and even showed them some of your favourite books and writers who inspired you, just like the girls all claimed to be inspired by you (which actually made you sob like a baby, bless you). after a good half hour of talking and signing and selfies, you were like "girls this has been so lovely and i've loved meeting you all, but i've left the boyf alone in the next room and i fear he might go rogue and pick too many books for us to actually be able to carry lol, so i'm going to say goodbye now and save him from himself lol" - they're like "oh, matty's here too? that's cool", and matty poked his head round the doorframe and waved like "yeah, i'm here. with a perfectly respectable number of books, actually, darling, thank you very much". the girls laughed and waved back, but that was the extent of their interaction with matty, too preoccupied with buying and reading everything you had signed or spoken about with them; he wasn't bothered in the slightest, though, just overwhelmingly excited for you. like, when you headed back to him, he gave you a huge hug and a kiss on the side of your head like "that was very lovely, sweetheart. m'proud of you, and i love that people love you almost as much as i do. but you're the best writer i know, so it's not really surprising"; you were like "love you too. couldn't do any of this without you in my life, inspiring me every day", and matty was like "ok let's go to the till before i cry lol there have been too many tears in this building today" (and then he bought and carried all your books for you because he's a simp) <3

[jamiespoon]

Sooo, time go I promised I would write something about charles’s personality, and here we are, 3 month later. Charles has lowkey always interested me, not gonna lie I wanted to know what happened to him to have such a shitty personality. I saw many people blaming charlotte for being an absent parent, but imo it has nothing to do with that, I think it’s more related to his sexuality. I warn you, this is gonna be a long essay; let’s start:

Charles was conscious of his sexuality since he was really young. At the beginning he thought there was nothing wrong with it, but eventually, being so close with the conclave, he realized it was. So what is the point? He was a gay man in a deeply homophobic society.

hypothesis n. 1

Charles always aspired to be a politician; he was inspired by his mother, the most important personality among the shadowhunters, and he always wanted to do something good for his people, just like her. Being so close with charlotte, charles grew and became a liberal man with the same ideals as his mother, but then something happened during his adolescence: he became aware of his sexuality, and after that everything changed.

We can sum it up in some phases:

Phase 1: charles discovers his sexuality and is disgusted by it (he realizes the conclave will never accept him, jeopardising his dream to become consul)

Phase 2: he denies it and tries to force himself into liking women

Phase 3: he realizes he isn’t attracted to women and never will

Phase 4: he becomes obsessed by the fact that the conclave will never accept a gay man as consul

Phase 5: Charles decides he will marry a woman Even at the cost of sacrificing his love life

Or it could also be like this:

Charles was conscious of his sexuality since a young age, but was ashamed by it and because of the fear of not being accepted, decides to become consul and being considered important (he’s definitely got a problem with self esteem and craves for people’s validation)

Between phase 3 and 4, charles is fully convinced there is something wrong with him, having a profound impact on his psyche. Being so young and yet so close to the conclave (bigot, traditionalist and discriminant), he gets conditioned and gradually approaches their ideals, poisoning the charming and young man with liberal ideas that he once was, and becoming the Charles we all know. So he is convinced by others that his mother is a weak woman and they need a new great conclave.

Imo Bridgestock had a really important role in all of this; charles was once close to charlotte and thought women were strong, he discovered his sexuality and thought he would have never be accepted, so he approached the other members of the conclave to score political points and having more possibilities to be elected consul, but he gets conditioned by Bridgestock and becomes a man full of rage and misogyny, but most of all repressed and opportunist.

Bridgestock never liked charlotte, and knowing that her son had a high probability to become the next consul, he grabbed the opportunity.

It was not C and H’s fault, children don’t always resemble their parents (Cassie said it herself); in general there are many factors that can effect a child’s growth, and despite how much C and H tried to protect him and giving him an open mentality, charles clearly suffered external negative conditioning; think about it, he’s the consul’s son and close to conclave’s members that didn’t want a woman in power, so they brainwashed him (what I was saying before). I refuse to believe Charlotte and Henry raised him to be like that, there is absolutely no way.

I’m so sorry I wrote such a long essay, please appreciate it because I put way too time into this one :’)) (i started writing it in september, sobbing)

[wodania]

Feel free to ignore this if it doesn't interest you, but your later posts made me wonder: Do you have any thoughts on what Jon (c) and Elia's relationship was like? Your "His own son is also Rhaegar’s son." it truth but he is also Elia's son and in the text he seems to think of her more negatively although (in my opinion) there was also something vaguely nostalgic about it,

Again, don't feel pressured to write an essay if they don't spark a lot of inspiration but feel free to ramble if you want to.

I’ve been on a ball with writing essays/rants/ramblings today it’s okay 😭

Jon’s relationship with Elia fascinates me because he never personally delves into it. His view of his own past is centred around Rhaegar, everything he recalls has something to do with Rhaegar. Like I said in the misogynistic JonCon allegations ask, I don’t think he was necessarily intentionally dissing Elia, but more so that he was letting out painful feelings in an unhealthy way. For a man who had no chance because the person he loved needed to produce heirs and Jon couldn’t help Rhaegar with that, it makes sense that he would be bitter about the fact that Elia could do that. Then he starts to pull out excuses like “she was sickly anyways, she could only give him two kids, she wasn’t worthy of him” just to make himself feel better, perhaps.

Knowing Jon, if Rhaegar told him to jump off a cliff, he’d do it. So I don’t think Jon and Elia being friends is so crazy to think of, since Rhaegar would likely wish for his childhood companion to be friendly with his wife. I think Jon might actually feel guilty about how he views Elia, which could easily put a strain on their relationship or his memory of Elia. Maybe that’s why he doesn’t acknowledge Elia being Aegon’s mother, or Aegon having a mother at all? Because he feels guilty for being bitter and jealous towards Elia, who was innocent and without any fault. Yet he’s still alive, raising her son, while she died a brutal death that she didn’t deserve.

Okay this took super long to reply to and is also lowkey unfinished because I’m trying to explain my theory with Elia and Jon’s relationship but i ended up falling down an entirely new rabbit hole that I cannot word properly. I didn’t end up explaining the nostalgia factor but I’m not going to do anymore because then I’m gonna end up accidentally unlocking another rabbit hole about Jon 😭

[m1ckeyb3rry]

Oooooh icic! That definitely makes sense now that you mention it too I’m even more curious…if you got a request for a character that was really obscure or say you had 0 interest in would you reject it? Or would you just like grit your teeth and try to write something LOL I know before you said that both your Rin and Sae fics were requests (I think apologies if I remembered wrong) and you also had some Hiori requests too and iirc those characters were all kinda uhh “new” (for lack of a better term) to your usually characters..? And esp with the itoshi “hate” neutrality since they aren’t usually characters you’d write of your own volition, like imagine if someone requested igaguri or like ego what would happen? LMAO

I’m no fic writer but I remember when I had to write essays I’d slap out the first like two paragraphs keep writing and in the end I’d always go back to rewrite the first two because the flow of my writing established itself in the latter parts LOL yeah I think beginning parts are usually less refined on the first draft. At least for me, the inspiration ends up flowing midway through when I finally have a solid idea of what I’m going for HAHA

I’m genuinely hoping we get a lot more spinoff content generally….I know some series make more spinoff content after their series ends so I hope we continue getting more bllkverse expansion soon!!! I seriously wanna know what happened in the other stratums in NEL and the first selections too

Yeahhh it’s wild I think actually there’s a French version of the Bible??? Which is why I’m like what’s the English team doing LMAO Reo getting voted for all the good ones was hilarious like even everyone in bllk is like yup bros got it all (Isagi’s comment was FOUL LMFAOOO) and igaguri being last in everything HAHAHAHA

FR!!! Im just sitting here waiting for a Karasu awakening like PLEASE man has been sitting there busting his ass carrying the team please give him a chance!!!!

Also speaking of Karasu…..ok this is gonna be kinda really random but I actually stumbled upon one of @/i-am-not-strange’s posts but FOR THE LIFE OF ME I can’t press on their profile??? Either my fingers are broken and I’m pressing on something wrong or Tumblr is just flipping out but do you have my idea what art they’re referring to in their recent post about like Karasu and Hiori swapping bodies…? I’m sure it’s not canon but I can’t lie and say I’m not intrigued LOL I would go ask them myself but whenever I try to go to their profile it either a) does nothing b) crashes??? I’ve never had this happen before (like I’m on your profile just fine) but???? Anyways…sorry for having to ask you here LMAO and no worries in advance if you don’t know it just caught my eye LOL

-Karasu anon

honestly i feel like i always cook 10x more with characters i don’t like/am unfamiliar with…maybe because it pushes me out of my comfort zone so i’m more willing to experiment?? like i think the instrument and white butterfly were probably my fav things that i wrote for my event (and honorary mention to seabird because it’s so cutesy) and both were for characters i was unfamiliar with!! lowkey i think i could go crazy with an igaguri or ego fic LMAOAO imagine an ego fic where you know him at his peak as a soccer player and watch his downfall (bonus points if you’re friends with noel noa/connected to that weird ass dynamic somehow) OR an igaguri fic that plays into his weird religious trauma of being forced to be a monk if he can’t play soccer?? mostly it’s treated as a joke but what if it was taken seriously…PLSSSS i need to STFU why did i just genuinely come up with plots for EGO and IGAGURI 😭 suffice to say i would literally write for any character no matter how obscure/how little i personally care abt them 🤩 i try not to let my biases show in my writing either and hopefully i’m successful in that!! like my itoshi neutrality doesn’t rlly manifest in the fics i’ve written for them i think!! so even if someone requested for one of my opps i wouldn’t let my distaste impact how i write/how seriously i take the story

omg that ALWAYS happens to me whenever i do essays too!! that’s why i hated high school writing when our teachers made us write our thesis first…like yes i can write a thesis for you but i can guarantee that i won’t follow it and it’ll be entirely different by the time i submit it so it follows the contents of what i actually wrote vs what i INTEND to write!!

blue lock has SUCH an expansive cast and it’s also sooo popular as a manga so just from a business/financial standpoint it would make 0 sense not to do spin-off stuff!! like i’d even read a sae spin-off of him in spain if they don’t want to go through the bllk program again and want to focus on one of the itoshis…we’ve followed rin pretty closely and know his mentality pretty well so idt he needs a spin-off but depending on how in depth the main manga goes on sae i think a spin-off of him could be fun!! or like shidou or smth…OR AN EGO ORIGIN STORY SPINOFF OMG I’D DIE FOR THAT ACTUALLY like him and young noel noa and their rivalry?? i don’t even like ego that much but i think it would be cool to see his backstory be explored like that!! also an episode anri but we know we’re never getting that sadly

FRRR why is there a french version but not english?? maybe it’s because bllk isn’t as popular here yet?? hoping that changes with season 2 though…i’m not saying jjk fanbase levels of popular because that’s when you get the crazies but def bigger than what it is rn

THEY GAVE HIORI AN AWAKENING THEY CAN GIVE KARASU ONE TOO!! especially because he was so crucial to hiori’s awakening…like come on now kaneshiro be a good author and put some parallels between mr talented but doesn’t care and mr mediocre but works hard 😒

HAHA THAT’S SO WEIRD tumblr stays tweaking 😭 i was able to go on her profile fine so maybe there’s smth going on with your app?? honestly wouldn’t be surprised if it’s a tumblr issue because for how old this app is it’s surprisingly unusable at times 🫣 maybe it’s working for me because she’s one of my mutuals?? idk 😰 also i know the post you’re referencing but do not know what art she was talking abt…i can send her an ask abt it and then link her response in the next ask of yours i answer and hopefully that works!! if not i could also add a screenshot into my answer LMAO

[plant-flwrs]

Heyy!! I wish you would write a fic where Fred is lowkey really into Shakespear and Romeo and Juliet and tries to woo the reader cs she’s muggleborn? Idk but it would be so cute!! 🥺

romeo and juliet // fred weasley

masterlist!

summary: Fred reads Romeo and Juliet and can’t help but fall in love

a/n: schools out, so hopefully that means more time for writing! thanks for the request anon i thought it was adorable, hope you like it!!

(2.5k)

At first, it was a secret. Fred had no intention of actually enjoying it. He had simply accepted the book Professor Lupin had lent him, thumbed through it, and stayed up all night to read it by accident.

Maybe it was because Lupin had seen the way Fred looked at you across the class, separated by hidden bloodlines and upbringings. You, with your muggle pens that you smuggled in. You, with your muggle records you used an entire bag to carry onto the train. You, with your muggle magazines that spread through the common room like wildfire. You, with those weird little things called cigarettes that you sold in your third year to the older students. You, with the way the older pureblood witches would sit and ask you to do their hair for them because only you could do all the newest muggle styles. You, with your reluctance to Quidditch but your love for soccer.

Fred was gone, absolutely gone for you. He was even more behind than usual in class because he couldn't help but find you with his eyes, no matter the room you were in or the distance between you both. Remus Lupin, the secret romantic, asked Fred to stay after class.

"Mr. Weasley," Professor Lupin called, feet kicked up on his desk while he levitated a novel wandlessly in front of him. A half-eaten apple rested on a napkin beside a chocolate wrapper and Fred was forced to remember the breakfast he had barely eaten, choosing to instead pretend he hadn't noticed the fact you had only sat a few seats away.

Fred stood in front of Lupin's desk, waiting as the room emptied out and George shot him a wink from the doorway.

"Yes, Professor?" Fred rocked on his feet, hands stuffed in the pockets of his robe. He tried not to wonder if you had noticed that he had been called behind, or if you had noticed him at all. He vaguely registered that this might what his brother would call 'pathetic'.

"You never turned in that essay on wandless defenses," Lupin said slowly, the book moving to rest on his desk as he moved his feet to the ground.

Fred was quiet, biting the inside of his cheek as he couldn't seem to recall the last time a teacher had bothered to talk to him about his assignments instead of deeming him a 'lost cause' or a student who 'simply wouldn't apply themselves'.

Professor Lupin sighed, moving again to stand. Fred thought he caught a flash of pain on the professor's face, perhaps a wince as he stood, but the moment was gone before Lupin was giving Fred a calculating and sympathetic glance.

"Do you need an extension?" Remus offered, leaning his hip against the desk and inclining his head to show Fred the importance of this offering.

"I'd appreciate that, Professor," Fred admitted.

They were silent again, Remus still looking at Fred like he was something to figure out. Remus shifted, eyes dropped to his desk and lips lifting.

"What's got you so preoccupied?"

Fred was blushing before he could think of a lie, and then he realized he didn't want to lie. He hadn't even told George about his crush on you- no doubt it was obvious. Fred had had flings and crushes on loads of girls, all fun and easy, but this felt heavier. He didn't want to have a fling with you.

"I guess-" Fred sighed, removing his hands from his robes and wiping them on his trousers, "I've just been distracted recently. A lot on my mind."

"Ah," Remus smiled fondly, nodding slowly.

A book began to move from a pile in the corner, elegantly and easily avoiding the tall stacks of clutter and various lumps of papers to levitate to Fred. Fred reached out for it, moving it in his hand to read the cover. Romeo and Juliet.

"I'll make you a deal, Fred," Professor Lupin said, his voice sounding so mischievous that Fred was surprised he hadn't become ten years younger right in front of him. "You can either write the essay on wandless defenses, or you can read that and write an essay on 'Romeo and Juliet'."

Fred thumbed through the book, eyebrows furrowed. He had never liked reading, most of the books at the Burrow belonged to Bill, Percy, or his father. He was pretty sure that George would find Fred reading Shakespeare to be just as funny as the time they released Cornish Pixies in the Slytherin changing rooms.

"Yeah, alright."

Fred managed to eat dinner that night, with you safely at the opposite end of the table. The curtains to his fourposter had been closed for hours and the light from his wand had been steadily bright for just as long. He had gone from laying on his back, head propped up beneath his arms, to resting his back against the headboard, to sitting upright in the center of his bed, head propped on his fist, to laying on his stomach, to laying on his back again with his head at the foot of his bed, and soon enough, the sun was flooding through a crack in the curtains. He had just finished Romeo and Juliet when he heard the showers starting.

"Lupin!"

Remus stopped and watched Fred catch up to him. He looked tired and simultaneously wide awake, his hair was a mess, and Remus was almost certain that he was wearing his pajama pants beneath his school robes.

"Mr. Weasley," Remus said cordially, continuing his walk to the greenhouse.

"I wanted to talk to you about that book you lent me-"

"Oh, you can keep it, if you'd like. I've read it dozens of times."

Fred hesitated, a wide smile spreading over his face, "Oh, thanks, Professor! It's just, I wanted to tell you I really liked it."

"You've finished it, then?" Remus asked with an impressed smile.

"Read it last night," Fred admitted, somewhat embarrassed.

"I look forward to the essay, then," Lupin said with a kind smile and a nod, turning into the greenhouses and leaving Fred in the corridor.

Inside his robes, he felt the weight of the tiny book against his chest. He kept it in a pocket there, fingers itching to hold it and read it again.

He couldn't help the roaring thoughts in his head. The idea that you were his Juliet, that you and he could find a hidden love, just for you two, amongst your external differences. He was oddly disappointed by the ending and decided he might not completely finish the book if he read it again, perhaps pretend it ended differently. He leaned his back against the stone wall behind him, fighting a blushing smile from his face.

So, Fred loved Shakespeare in secret. He loved reading in secret. He loved the weight of the book in his hands in secret. He loved the words and the phrases in secret. He loved the way it made him think in secret. He loved you in secret. He loved in secret.

Until you started dating Thomas Meadowbrooke. Thomas was a Ravenclaw, wickedly smart, handsome, kind, and the victim of many of the Weasley twins' pranks for a while. George didn't directly ask Fred why they were suddenly pranking this one boy so relentlessly all of a sudden, but he didn't need to.

Thomas wore blazers with patches on the elbows and combed his silky hair down the middle. He always had a flower in his coat pocket to give to you and he always carried a book of poetry with him. He was sensitive and wistful in all the ways girls loved, including you.

You thought Thomas was painfully boring. He would fawn over you in the most annoying ways, giving you poems that he wrote (horrendously awful, they were) and quoting lines from old and boring books to you. He didn't listen to Joan Jett or Janis Joplin and he cringed when you played your records. He suggested Bach or Debussy instead. He was boring.

You had only agreed to go out with him because he asked. Thomas Meadowbrooke may have been able to put a cornish pixie to sleep just by talking to it, but he was undeniably handsome. Well, he was more handsome before he had fallen victim to a particularly entertaining Weasley twin prank that turned his hair gelled and spiked up for a few days.

You broke up with Thomas soon after. He took it well, saying it gave him fuel to finish some poetry he hadn't been inspired enough for before.

Remus heard this gossip quite excitedly.

"She did, did she?" Remus tilted his head, a coy smirk on his lips.

The smell of fertilizer was strong, but he learned not to mind it as he watched the merry witch digging in various pots.

"He was quite heartbroken, the poor thing. Filius said that when he did routine bed checks, he could hear Thomas crying for weeks!" Professor Sprout sighed, patting down the soil and checking for weeds.

"Teen romance is always quite fickle," Remus commented, following Pomona as she moved to the next pot.

"Says you!" Pomona playfully scolded Remus, her red cheeks filling as she smiled.

Remus chuckled, thinking back to Sirius who would sneak into his office later to distract him from grading papers.

"You know, Pomona," Remus said in that voice of his, the one that got Sprout to drop her trowel and lean in close to hear the latest gossip. "I think Fred Weasley's got a bit of a crush on Y/n."

Pomona gasped, dirty hand flying to cover her mouth. She paused, scrunching up her face and sticking her tongue out to spit out the clump of dirt.

"He hasn't!" she continued, not minding Remus' amused smile and the clean rag he offered her to wipe her hands.

"He's always staring at her," Remus said, thinking on it. "I reckon he's quite the secret romantic."

Pomona cooed and awed as she continued to tend to her plants, she and Remus trading anymore gossip that they could think of.

The weather changed at quite a convenient time for Fred. With the slightly warm but still a bit chilled fall weather, Fred could dawn his lighter coats. His lighter coats that happened to have wonderfully shaped pockets on the inside, just the right size for a book.

Fred wondered if you had gone out with Thomas because Ravenclaw book nerds were your type, or if you had broken up with him because Ravenclaw book nerds weren't your type. Fred had spent almost all of the warm weather contemplating how he was going to continue to live if he was determined to remain secretly in love with you. By fall he had figured it out.

Fred wasn't going to hide anything, not the books he had recently begun to love, or the way he loved so strongly. He wasn't going to miss meals because you were so distracting. He wasn't going to suffocate under his crush on you.

It was a beautiful day. George was up in the dorms with Lee working on a prank and Fred had decided to take a walk down to the Black Lake. His lighter coat was a bit heavier because of the book in the pocket, and Fred pushed his hair out of his eyes as he looked down at the ground to avoid stepping on tree roots. He found a nice spot beneath a tree, resting against the trunk and reading.

"Hey, Fred," a voice called, coming closer as they easily avoided the maze of tree roots.

Fred looked up to see you, in those perfect muggle clothes you wore any chance you could, hair styled in that wonderful muggle way, one of those muggle cigarettes tucked behind your ear, walking towards him.

"Hey," he responded, surprised by how easy his voice sounded.

"Have you been reviewing at all for Lupin's?" You sat next to Fred like it was the easiest thing in the world, brushing your shoulder against his.

"No, not really," Fred closed his book with his thumb tucked between the pages saving his spot.

"Mmm," you hummed, leaning your head back against the tree and closing your eyes. "What're you reading?"

"Romeo and Juliet," Fred replied, looking at your profile while he had the chance.

"Didn't think that was your thing," you said playfully, opening one eye to catch Fred looking at you.

He flushed and turned his gaze to his hands in his lap. "Me neither," he admitted, swallowing.

"I always liked ‘The Taming of the Shrew’, personally."

Fred smiled to himself, because of course, you had also read Shakespeare, and of course, you would have a cool favorite.

"I like that one, too," Fred said lamely, enjoying the way you were smiling at him.

By winter, Fred had devised a plan. It was perfect, more perfect than any prank he had created or any Zonko's product he had bought. He would die if he kept all this love to himself, so he decided all he needed was one kiss.

The Yule Ball was in full swing, the classical and slow music long forgotten as everyone moved to the dance floor and rocked to the loud and fast rhythm. Fred had seen you when you first arrived, noticing with glee that you were alone, and hadn't lost sight of you since. He had removed himself from the heavily crowded dance floor, stumbling to the table with the juice he and George had spiked hours earlier. He loosened the collar of his robes and pushed his already disheveled hair out of his face.

You watched Fred move through the crowd like a tornado, a mass of energy that you felt required to look at and admire. He strode to the table, a quiet and self-satisfied smirk on his lips as he took a long sip of punch.

Fred caught you staring at him with pleasant unexpectedness. You looked just as beautiful as you did when the night started, skin glowing and everything dawned upon you with your magical muggle-ness. Fred put his cup down, a comfortable pink hue warming his cheeks, and approached you. He touched his hand to yours.

"Hey, Fred," you said with an entertained smirk, glancing down at his hand on yours.

"I need you to do me a favor," he slurred, voice easy and breath warm as it landed on your skin.

"What kind of favor?"

"I need you to kiss me," Fred pulled his mouth away from your ear, looking to your face.

He didn't have much of an opportunity, though, before your lips were on his and you stole his breath. He tasted of the spiked punch and his hands were trembling and careful as they rested on your waist. You grabbed a fistful of his robes, pulling him close to you with urgency.

He pulled away, lips red and swollen, with his eyes still closed.

"I need you to do me a favor," you said, mouth hovering above his.

"Yeah?"

"Kiss me," you whispered, just loud enough for Fred to hear.

He listened, and held onto you with less trembling and more confidence as you kissed for the second time.

[kirikiribaku]

I saw your KiriBaku headcanons post, and your Kirishima not liking Bakugou's mum headcanon got me intrigued! I mean, I understand (Im not her biggest fan either and admittedly very prone to antagonizing her), but I'm interested to hear your ideas for it!

boy. When I read this ask I told myself: I’m gonna sit down in front of the computer and write a well-argued answer. So now I have this 1k-words essay in a word document that I’m about to copy-paste here. Enjoy.

On why Kirishima wouldn’t like Bakugou’s mum.

Okay, so first of all, full disclaimer, this is all a result of my own headcanons (that may have been inspired by some canon content), but still remain as that, headcanons.

We don’t know much about Bakugou’s mum besides the fact that she works in the fashion industry and that she’s...

well. Pretty aggressive.

The scene where Aizawa comes ask for the kids’ parents’ permission to move into the dorms is the one time we get to see Katsuki’s parents and their personalities, and while I can understand the appeal of making Mitsuki rough and aggressive (his son really takes after her!), there’s just something that doesn’t feel right.  We see her hit Bakugou multiple times while his teachers are there, she even pushes his head down into an apologetic bow, and we know this must have been normal during Katsuki’s childhood because of what he says during the remedial course.

That’s how he was raised! What does that mean? That he received a few slaps every time he was being a brat? That his mum would yell at him and he didn’t hesitate to raise his voice back until she lost her patience? (is that why he talks so loudly all the time now?) Not the ideal environment for a kid, and yes it probably has a lot to do with all his anger issues as a teenager.  

But what really really gets to me is this one particular panel.

I understand this probably might have been drawn as a gag panel, “Oh look, they’re fighting again haha! That must be lowkey uncomfortable for the teachers!”.

But I don’t think calling Bakugou weak for being kidnapped is funny. And I don’t think he could just brush it off at that time.

The guilt and self-hate that must have (still are) eating at Bakugou, that would build up to the catharsis during Deku vs Kacchan 2, must’ve only been worsened by comments like that one.

So yeah. No. Not at all what Mitsuki should’ve said as his mother.

If we know little about Bakugou’s parents, we know nothing about Kirishima’s family (Horikoshi please this is me begging you). But we do know Kirishima: sweet, friendly, all sunshine smiles and words of encouragement! He is the opposite of Bakugou in that aspect, and that makes me think that his parents mums are completely different from Mitsuki too.

I imagine (again, we are entering headcanon territory) Kirishima was raised in a caring environment, showered with love and affection. He was probably a pretty well mannered kid too, so he didn’t argue with his mums often, and they never raised a hand against him.

So now, what do you think Kirishima’s opinion of Bakugou’s mum would be, if he ever met her?

I don’t think Katsuki talks about his mum much (if at all) with his classmates. Why would he. But then again we saw the “I was raised this way” quote earlier, so let’s say Kirishima and he talk about her at some point, for the sake of this argument. 

Maybe they’re on a study date in Bakugou’s room, Kirishima still finishing his homework while Bakugou reads laying on his bed. Kirishima’s been telling Bakugou about how excited he is to go back home for the holidays because he wants to see his mums, that they’re gonna go shopping and cook together. Bakugou remains silent, humming from time to time to signal he’s paying attention, but not looking at Kiri. There’s silence when Kirishima stops talking, and since it doesn’t seem like Bakugou is gonna say anything on his own accord, he asks: “Hey, I just realised, you’ve never told me what your mum’s like.”

Bakugou scoffs, “she’s fucking annoying.”

“Oh, come on,” Kirishima teases, “she can’t be that bad.”

Bakugou shrugs. His brow is furrowed and his shoulders tense. He turns to his side, showing his back to Kirishima. “I’d much rather stay here training, holidays‘re a waste of time.”

Kirishima’s face falls. It’s not just Bakugou’s words that get to him, but his whole body language. It’s not like when he refuses to hang out with the class in the common room on a week day, or when he reluctantly agrees to go to the game centre with their friends. He looks truly uncomfortable. The idea of not enjoying the precious days one gets to spend with their family is... depressing for Kirishima. He feels sad for Bakugou; just what kind of environment did Bakugou grow up in?

If Kirishima were ever to witness Mitsuki calling Bakugou weak, I’m sure he would snap and jump into the argument to defend Bakugou. Knowing Kirishima’s backstory, and how bad he struggled with confidence-issues in middle school, this is probably one of the worst insults for him – and it’s being thrown at one of the strongest people he knows, a kid he’s grown to admire and whose words serve as inspiration for him!

So Kirishima cannot accept it. He would stand up and praise Bakugou for all he’s worth, his manliness and his ambition, his power and his technique, with such confidence and determination that it would leave Mitsuki at a loss for words. And he would be appalled that it was Katsuki’s own mother who was slandering him so easily like that

TL;DR: What I’m trying to say is that Bakugou’s relationship with his mum seems uncomfortable and stressful, the kind of mother-son relationship that would make Bakugou feel locked in and constantly on edge in his own house, maybe even not appreciated. Kirishima is perceptive enough to notice that, and that’s why he doesn’t like Bakugou’s mother.

[bettsfic]

march pinned: ending the sex project

in the march edition of my lowkey writing-related newsletter, in addition to my writing-related post roundup and upcoming consultation availability, i have personal essay recommendations and a segment on the definition of a project!

for more information on my creative coaching services, check out my carrd.

if you want to receive my lowkey writing-related newsletter directly, you can subscribe here.

full newsletter below the cut, or you can read it here.

fuck february, amiright?

i thought january was bad. but february. february was the stuff of nightmares. my cousin passed away from covid (you can read about her here; she was really an amazing person and i feel so lucky to have known her). i was finally formally diagnosed with PCOS (bittersweet, i guess). my car broke down. i took two (2) days off and it took me two and a half weeks to get caught up again. i can only hope march treats us all a little more gently.

the good news is, i finished revisions on my short story collection to send to my agent, finished workshop submissions for the semester, and now i can return to my first love, fanfiction. that i am constantly working through original fiction to return to fanfiction has been making me think a lot about the nature of a creative, capital-p Project. so, this month’s BTALA (been thinkin a lot about) is going to inspect the concept of a “project.”

new resource

last month i unveiled a folder of my favorite short stories which i’m pleased to hear several of you have perused and gotten some inspiration from. this month i’ve compiled my favorite personal essays. there are fewer essays than there are short stories because i’ve broken them into two groups: personal and craft. next month i hope to have the craft essays compiled.

i’m always looking for more things to love, so if you have recommendations for your favorite short stories and essays, i’d be happy to hear them!

writing-related posts

how to physically maneuver the revision process

the difference between M and E ratings of fic

resources for worldbuilding (check out the reblogs for more!)

a couple syntax/prose book recs

how to break a long work into chapters

march availability

unfortunately i have to cut my coaching hours down a bit, so i don’t have any openings left in march, but i have some availability in april. if you’re interested in a writing consultation, please fill out this google form!

you can learn more about my services on my carrd.

what i’m into rn

for the past year, i’ve basically been trapped in a 10x10 room, and my health is definitely reflecting that, both mentally (does anyone else feel like they’re living in groundhog day? just, every day being exactly the same except fractionally worse than the day before??) and physically (i reorganized the kitchen and could barely move for two days).

reader, i have discovered something called “walking,” in which i put on real human shoes and go outside. it feels strange, bestial. neighbors wave hello to me. a harrowing experience.

while doing this, this walking, i’ve been listening to the lolita podcast which a friend recommended to me, a ten-episode series that dives into everything lolita: the novel itself, its context, adaptations, greater cultural responses, and — as a sticker on my laptop says — vladimir “russian dreamboat” nabokov. as far as i can tell it seems well-researched and presents the many perspectives of lolita in a fair way. i’m only a few eps in, but i’m entranced so far. highly recommended if you, like me, have a complicated relationship with lolita.

i’ve also found myself mildly addicted to a mobile otome game called obey me, which. look i know it’s like the definition of cringe but it’s also mind-numbingly fun and if i want to spend my minimal free time pretending 7 demon brothers are all vying for my affection then that’s between me and god. it’s a lot of what i loved about WoW: frequent events, bright colors, a daily to do list of simple but satisfying tasks, many many rewards, and it doesn’t take itself very seriously. and if i have 4k fic written of mammon/reader that’s nobody’s business but mine and my longsuffering ao3 subscribers.

i’m telling you this because i don’t know anyone else who plays it and am desperate to trade headcanons. so if you play, or start playing, hit me up!! i will give u mad tips and daily AP.

been thinkin a lot about

the project. the project. even the word “project.” PROject (noun). proJECT (verb). what is the project? “project” comes from the latin pro and jacare which means “to throw forward,” or projectum which means “something prominent.” a projector throws forward an image. to project onto something means to throw your perspective onto something else. to embark on a project is to make something prominent in your life. the concept of “the projects” comes from public housing projects, the government throwing forward affordable housing.

what is the project? in joseph harris’ essay “coming to terms” he says that “to define the project of a writer is…to push beyond his text, to hazard a view about not only what someone has said but also what he was trying to accomplish by saying it.” harris’ perspective is that of an english teacher encouraging his students to read critically, not just to summarize a text but to find its project, its greater purpose. and while i first read this essay in a seminar on composition pedagogy, it stuck with me as a writer. it made me reconsider the greater nature of the creative project.

how many of us, if asked to describe our writing project, would begin with a plot or character premise, the nuts and bolts of a specific story? maybe even the working title? but i wonder, is breaking out the plot really the project? is the discipline of sitting down and typing really the project? and when the story is finished, is the project over? what is the project?

in 2019, i wrote 86k words of a novel. i began revising that novel last fall, and i’m finding that i’ll probably keep maybe less than 10k of that initial draft. i’m not bothered by that. the novel i wrote before that started at 125k, then i rewrote the entire thing to 200k, then i whittled it back down to 160k, and next i’ll be tasked with paring it back down to 80k. i’m not bothered by that either. in the past five years or so i’ve written about 2 million words, and i’ve only published 20k of them. only 1% of what i’ve written, i’ve published. in the words of lauren cooper (catherine tate), i’m not bothered.

i used to see publication as the birth of the project, and writing it akin to a long gestation period. then i saw publication as the death of the project, and its life was lived in its drafting. now, publication seems irrelevant to the project. the confines of a story and its many revisions are also irrelevant to the project. the beginning of a story is not the start of the project and the end of the story is not the end of the project. the project is larger than the story, its revisions, its publication, and its eventual readership.

i think it took me so long to see this because for so many years i was still in my first project, the sex project, an exploration of trauma and sexual identity, which began in 2014 with destiel fanfiction, endured through many fandom shifts, my MFA, years adrift as an adjunct, all the way through 2020 with the completion of my short story collection. i used to wonder how anyone could write about anything other than sex. to me it was the only topic worth my attention. i was certain that i would spend my entire life being a sex writer and i’d never find fulfillment writing a young adult sci fi adventure or a highly literary novel about complicated family dynamics. i was baffled by people who were interested in other things, who could write entire novels without using the word “cock” even once.

then my sex project ended. i don’t know when exactly it happened or why, but suddenly i realized i never wanted to write another artful description of an orgasm or find a tactful euphemism for a vagina ever again (personally i prefer “wet cunt” because not only is it blunt, i find it phonetically pleasing). obviously i’m still writing explicit fanfic but it doesn’t feel the same as it used to. sex feels more sidelined to me, even if it’s still the center and drive of a fic. i no longer get any personal satisfaction from writing it, although i do get satisfaction in sharing the work for readers to enjoy.

it’s like i’ve somehow solved the biggest puzzle of my life. or i guess made peace with my meanest monster, that extremely complicated double-mind of desire that some non-sex-repulsed asexuals feel: you want to feel desire you can’t actually feel so you write it into fiction, to try to understand this thing you can’t have and which society tells you you’re missing, and you don’t even know if you don’t have it, because you still feel desire for affection and intimacy, and maybe even a desire to be desired. and for those of us who are asexual and have c-ptsd, sex you don’t actually want (but don’t know you don’t want, because maybe you’re ambivalent and mildly curious and touch-starved) and an unrelenting drive toward people-pleasing can be a dangerous combination. how can you ever know what consent is if you always put other people’s desires above your own?

maybe i’m alone in this. maybe i’m not. maybe for most people, wanting sex is a light switch: yes i want it, or no i don’t. but for me, i had to write a whole lot of words to figure out things like desire, consent, intimacy, forgiveness, the shape that good love takes. the lengthy theoretical flowchart of “i might be interested in having sex if this and this and this and this and this happens in this exact order and under these exact circumstances.”

it was hard to write something into reality that i have never seen except in pieces, in subtext i clung to with no lexicon to give it shape and meaning. te lawrence in lawrence of arabia. some of tarantino’s early work. the film benny and joon. and weirdly, the star wars prequels (that one’s hard to explain; i’ll spare you). i don’t think the sex project was about coming to terms with my asexuality as much as it was trying to organize my thoughts and feelings by continuously rendering my own experiences within a greater, shinier ideal — like how you sometimes have to unravel the entire skein of yarn to find the loose end, and only then can you get started.

i guess i’m in the infancy of the power project now. i’m moving toward themes of control, infamy, greatness. the exact circumstances in which atrocity occurs. how people rise into leadership and fall from grace. the consequences of success. i don’t know why this project has come to me, or what, if anything, it has to do with me. i’m not famous and have no intention of becoming famous; i don’t have social power or influence, at least not beyond my little corner of fandom, and i’m not interested in having it. and yet, here we are, already hundreds of thousands of words in.

my fics digging for orchids (tgcf) and a standing engagement (the hunger games) deal with the detriments of fame. and even float (breaking bad) to a degree is about the aftermath of being so close to power. my novel cherry pop, loosely based on macbeth, is about an ongoing power exchange between two teenage girls. my other novel, vandal, is about a girl who believes she has magic powers and casts a spell on her neighbor to fall in love with her. and i’m in the very early stages of a novel called groundswell, a cult story i’ve been wanting to write for years. i had no idea why i couldn’t write it until i realized it wasn’t yet my project. i’m not even to the stage of developing characters, let alone a premise or plot. i’m still just building my aesthetic pile (i discuss the aesthetic pile here, as well as vandal in more detail), watching documentaries on cults, reading books, finding inspiration, marking down ideas as they come. it may be years before i’m ready to sit down and write it.

now that i know what the project is, i have more patience with myself. it doesn’t bother me to rewrite a novel from the beginning, or to scrap novels altogether, because the story isn’t the project. the project cannot be diminished by cutting words, sentences, paragraphs, entire chapters. the project does not have a product. the project cannot be published. the project is in the practice, in dragging the impossibly large into clear, acute existence, so you can see it. so you can see the very center of what you thought was an unknowable thing.

[itsybitsylemonsqueezy]

Hey, it’s me again! ^_^ I hope I don’t bother you too much with my requests, but your posts are so cool I just can’t help it. Upon completing Yakuza 4 I’ve had a lot of thoughts and feels about Daigo and how his character was handled across the series. To be honest, at first I didn’t like him much, because he seemed pretty bland (and his screen time leaves much to be desired), but soon enough he’s really grown on me. What is your opinion on him if you don’t mind me asking?

I definitely do not mind requests! Meta is my bread and butter c: I’ve just been busy for a few days, sorry ^^; And... my opinions on Daigo are not going to be as mindblowing or exciting as my opinions on Kiryu, I’ll be real ^^; And there’s a big advantage in Kiryu being the protag, All of the content is about him ^^; I do love Daigo, I think he’s a super interesting character, but his tragedy is just what you pointed out, he’s underutilized. And he isn’t set up very well to have the position he holds. 

But, so saying, let’s get into my essay on Daigo ^^; 

So, we meet Daigo properly in game 2. There’s little side stories with baby Daigo in Zero which helps build Daigo’s and Kiryu’s relationship and set up for what would later happen, but we don’t really know him until game 2. And game 2 is a LOT about Daigo and his arc and what he’s meant to be! There’s a tumblr text post meme somewhere with a pic of Daigo depressed in his little puffy white coat that says “And I’ll probably become the next chairman of the Tojo Clan. Things like that just happens to guys like me.” and that is totally accurate! Like, it’s a funny thing to complain about, but that’s obviously the struggle Daigo’s having, understanding from a young age that it was obviously his destiny to succeed Sohei, the only problem is uh... well... Kiryu. 

I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but Dojima Sohei never became chairman of the Tojo Clan. And that’s really wild thinking back to Zero and how powerful he was, he was all but a shoo in for chairman. But then, uh... Kiryu. Kiryu happened. Kiryu, and Majima I should say, are the reason Sera becomes chairman, not Sohei. Forever upsetting the wheels of fate. Given where we see Sohei next, I can’t imagine that he ever really recovered from that upset ^^; And I’m SURE it made him bitter towards Kiryu the rest of his life. And considering, again, where we see him next, I think the canon supports this ^^; 

So what becomes of Daigo’s destiny then? His father had victory snatched away, destiny denied, and everything he had slowly crumbles over time, leaving his son with less and less to inherit, but still with the ideology that he should take this over. That’s an awkward position to be in. 

And then Sera dies. Ooh, golly, I wonder who the next chairman’s gonna- it’s Kiryu. Of course it’s fucking Kiryu, how could it not be? It OBVIOUSLY should be Kiryu. He’s the strongest, the bravest, and who inspires the most loyalty. It doesn’t matter that Kiryu’s never been in leadership before, he TURNS people. Kiryu could get anyone on his side through sheer force of personality, which is hilarious to say about a guy with maybe 3 facial expressions. But tell me I’m wrong. I cannot count the number of part-time antagonists who turned on a dime because Kiryu beat their ass. And anyone who can do that can rule the world. Kiryu was absolutely the best pick for chairman and I will fight the world on this.

(Abbreviated for length, this is a LONG post)

But... then Kiryu makes the stupidest decision of his entire fucking life and renounces the chairmanship. And he has his reasons, feeling unworthy, traumatized from the events of Kiwami 1, unsure if he even wants to stay in the yakuza or if there’s maybe something else he wants to do with his life... he’s going through a lot of intense self-reflection and self-doubt and, I hate to harp on it, but fucking trauma. His brother blew himself up in front of him in a bid for redemption after all but telling Kiryu that all of his mistakes are Kiryu’s fault. Yeah, no, I’m sure Kiryu’s doing FINE with that. So, like, I can see why Kiryu said no, but it was still... fucking nuts. And it irrevocably changed the trajectory of everyone in this universe. Which Kiwami 2 goes out of its way to explore. Kiryu’s leaving? Majima fucking retires, Terada’s suspect, there aren’t any old, loyal hands left to lead the families, and we see how vulnerable the Tojo clan is on every side because Kiryu just up and fucked off. 

(I have A LOT of feelings about Kiryu being chairman and someday I will have the strength to write the AU we all deserve where Kiryu stays as chairman)

So... the wheel of fate turns and oh yeah remember Daigo? Dojima Sohei’s son Daigo? The kid who’s been raised his whole life to take over the clan only to be denied at every turn? How’s he doing? Not great! It turns out, not great! Kiryu, his father figure, killed his ACTUAL father, but didn’t really, took the blame for some other weird guy, leaving Daigo with one badass mother and very little direction in life. Daigo’s been brought up thinking he’ll take over a great kingdom but all that’s left now is a broken wreck about to be demolished and picked apart by scavengers. Great, yeah, just what any kid wants to inherit. And he wasn’t trained to fix this, it’s kinda shitty to saddle him with destiny and then not train him for the thing that actually has to be done and then do it anyway. It’s real shitty actually. And not many people help Daigo. 

Daigo couldn’t have taken the chairmanship directly from Sera, he was still just a teenager then. But it probably would have been nice if Kiryu checked in with him even fucking once since getting out of jail. But no, we never explain on screen to Daigo what happened as far as I can remember. Which, I feel, is a pretty fucking big oversight. How the fuck is Daigo supposed to trust you Kiryu? Or we’re supposed to believe he just figured it out off screen and holds no grudges? Like, I’m sure knowing Kiryu didn’t kill Sohei helps, but he couldn’t fucking tell you that himself? He couldn’t trust you with that information or that conversation? Fuck this. Very understandably, Daigo has his own crisis of faith about the yakuza, very much in parallel to Kiryu’s. Why the fuck SHOULD he go to bat for a crumbling organization that has only proven itself to be a dog chasing its own tail, willing to devour itself at the slightest provocation? It took his father, both his fathers, and he didn’t really get either of them back. Why the fuck should he try to fix that? 

And to its credit, Kiwami 2 does a decent job of articulating Daigo’s motivations there. I could have done with even more, but I think they do him credit in showing him as disenfranchised and lost. And I think it’s refreshing to see someone have to confront the consequences of what’s happened since Kiryu left. Because the games don’t do a good job of showing that this is Kiryu’s direct fault. They never like to make Kiryu’s decisions have consequence, which is poor use of a protag. Rightly or wrongly, their decisions ALWAYS have consequence, or they’re not the protag. You can’t have it both ways. If this person is going to matter then, guess what, their consequences matter. Kiryu turned away. Rightly or wrongly, he did that. Daigo will never get that opportunity. Child of destiny. Not only was he bred and raised for this, he doesn’t know how to do anything else either. He doesn’t have other options the way Kiryu does. And we’re in a terrible vacuum of power. Terada’s namely in charge, but no one’s loyal to him. Even if he wasn’t deliberately fostering this, the Tojo Clan can’t survive without faith in their leader. Daigo, by fact of being his fathers’ son, can bind what’s left. And he has to because Kiryu won’t. Which is... really shitty. So either Daigo does this, or we all hang. And we never quite articulate that this is on Kiryu’s say so. Kiryu could still take over now and fix it he just... won’t.

And on top of this already comfortably stressful situation... we set Daigo up to come into a stable situation of power, where his transition would be smooth. We didn’t give him the tools to know how to salvage. He’s not practiced negotiating with hostile entities or even just people who will resent him because he’s young. And he’s lost a lot of faith, without even charisma and willpower on his side, this is a massively uphill battle. If he doesn’t believe, who else will believe him? Daigo knows this. And we watch that struggle go on, all while Kiryu just cheerleads. He hasn’t decided yet if he’s gonna stay in the yakuza either and he’s lowkey depressed after Kiwami 1. Lowkey he’s just suffering depression and can’t do as much as he normally would. Not an excuse, but I think an important way to read how tired and reluctant he is. Some therapy would really fucking help. 

Anyway, we manage to get through Kiwami 2 and install Daigo as chairman, at which point Kiryu fucks off for good. Now, he kinda/sorta leaves some supports for Daigo, in Majima specifically, but also in Kashiwagi and I wanna believe in Daigo’s mom too. She was so cool and then we just... never talked about her again ^^; Laaaame *sigh* So, I guess, Kiryu did try to fulfill his remaining responsibilities as Daigo’s living father, but mostly it was just an excuse for him to leave and not feel guilty. Mostly it was him foisting off his duties onto someone else. He didn’t stay to teach Daigo everything he knew about the people Daigo would have to control. He didn’t teach Daigo and Majima how to talk to each other, a thing which REPEATEDLY comes back to bite us in the ass. He’s not there for Daigo to ask advice and help. Kiryu is full of confidence for Daigo, he’s not TRYING to make him fail, but Kiryu’s so caught up in his own need to leave, he neglects to people who need him. 

And Daigo, to his everlasting credit, does his best to get by without Kiryu’s help. As much as possible, he never calls to ask Kiryu for help. And he does grow into a quite competent chairman! He does successfully rehabilitate the Tojo Clan, he makes them profitable again, he insists on respect and people don’t run amok under him. He does it, he salvages a dying organization. And he may not even really believe in it, but he has such a sense of responsibility, he does it anyway. He knows there’s no one else. He knows if he goes to Kiryu and says I don’t want this, Kiryu won’t help him. Kiryu didn’t mean for it to happen this way, he didn’t mean to be selfish and put others in a bad position. But he wasn’t there to listen. And I think Kiryu eventually comes to rue that. 

The very unfortunate thing about Kiryu is... he is a dragon. Even though he is kind and generous and not greedy in a conventional sense, he is greedy. As much as Kiryu is a powerhouse because come hell or high water, he does what he thinks is right... this also makes him extremely selfish. He can be blind to other people’s needs and refused to be tied down. Again, for the best of reasons, because he’s trying to raise a family, because this environment is triggering for him, but he just hauls off and does things instead of talking to anyone which... makes him impossible to have a working relationship with. He has to learn to talk and to listen and that he can’t make all of the decisions by himself. The great irony being, Kiryu never wants to, but he doesn’t know how to ask for help. He’s so used to have everything put on him, he doesn’t realize it doesn’t have to be that way... but anyway, I’m getting caught up ^^; The point is, he thinks because he ditched the Tojo Clan they no longer care about him. Which is... naive at best. Of course people still care about you dumbass. Which makes Kiryu a massive vulnerability to the Tojo. In 3 and 4, Daigo makes stupid calls trying to protect Kiryu and trying to protect his interests. And because Kiryu hasn’t left open an avenue for them to talk, Daigo has to make these decisions on his own with bad information and he does his fucking best. But... he doesn’t know how to make the best of what he has, not like Kiryu would, and he fucks up sometimes. 

I really, really love game 4 for that reason. Daigo’s fuck up is SO understandable, SO reasonable. It sounded like a good idea, it sounded like peace and harmony. And he was left without a leg to stand on before he knew it. In many ways, it wasn’t his fault. Kiryu himself says as much. And I may never forgive the end of 4 for letting Kiryu REALIZE he defaulted on his responsibilities but then, instead of changing his behavior in any way, he fucks off back to Okinawa. God... *siiiigh* ANYWAY. 

And this struggle, this lack of communication, but unstated loyalty, comes full circle in game 5. When Daigo is literally drowning, literally knows he’s going to fail this time and there’s nothing he can do, and even when he’s with Kiryu, he can’t bring himself to ask for help. He knows Kiryu won’t or can’t. Instead he asks for absolution. He tries to tell his dad he’s just been doing his best and... he’s sorry for the terrible things that are about to happen. How gutting that Daigo can only see himself as a failure because... he’s not Kiryu. No one’s Kiryu. Even Kiryu refuses to be Kiryu. But Daigo knows if he was just Kiryu, things would be better. He’s not a legend. He’s not a god. He’s not all-powerful or crazy or impossible. He’s just a guy, doing his best because he had to. Because there was no one else. And some days Daigo does great, but a lot of days, he doesn’t measure up. And that eats at Daigo like mold. Kiryu would NEVER look at Daigo this way. Heck, most people at that point would never compare them. It’s in Daigo’s head, but it still hurts. He’s still, even now, looking up to Kiryu and he’ll just... never quite get there. 

This is the only good thing I will ever say about game 6, and it was still 2 or 3 games too late, but Kiryu finally acknowledging Daigo as his son was good. Kiryu saying he was proud and saying he was grateful was good. Again, several games late, but... it still mattered. It still mattered that, in the end, Kiryu recognized his legacy in Daigo. That he understood so much of what Daigo did and does and is and was is for him. That mattered. 

Daigo is a great chairman who takes care of his clan. But he was robbed of his relationship with his father. The games never work on the relationships that exist, strong relationships, for reasons I will never understand. Games 3, 4, and 5 would have been SO much more interesting if we had just like Kiryu talk to his fucking friends. Two would have been SO much easier if Kiryu had just been fucking chairman like he was fucking supposed to be and the transition of power to Daigo came later and smoother, with Kiryu helping to make it. Daigo tries his hardest every day and he’s an incredible negotiator and savior after all the shit he’s had to pull the Tojo Clan through, kicking and screaming and fighting to tear itself apart every damn day. The generation above him is all legends, Majima and Saejima and Kiryu. Daigo isn’t one of them. But he’s better because he was here and because he tries and because he succeeds. We need Daigo. We deserve him. 

[omnyamaflowerz]

Omg if you’re still taking requests for Kinktober, could I request anything with dark! Viktor Drago? Whichever subject matter inspires you is perfectly fine (non-con/ dub-con if you’re comfortable with that) I just really love dark! Viktor 😭😭😭

sorry, this took forever, but school is on my ass. 

Warnings: dub-con/non-con, masturbation, voyeurism-ish. Viktor being a perv. Lowkey created a new character I could write for, lol. 

kinktober prompts & masterlist

Want

Viktor needed a change. He had a string of wins after his loss to Adonis, but he still wasn’t happy. He tried working through things with Ivan, but Viktor realized he was too dependent on his father. Things were borderline toxic and Viktor didn’t want to continue this way. Especially after another confrontation with Ludmilla. 

Though Ivan didn’t teach him much, but how to fight, Viktor knew a little bit about money. They didn’t have much, but where they could saved, they did. Viktor had plenty of his earnings saved from his fights. What Ivan didn’t take from some of his bigger fights, Viktor kept for himself. 

It was going to be drastic, but he decided to make a big change and move to America. He knew of a boxing gym in New York that he could continue to train at and he still had contact with Buddy Marcille to get fights lined up. Viktor wasn’t going to let the grass grow beneath his feet and he needed to separation. To find himself and be without Ivan for a while. Ivan, of course, protested, but he let him go.

Viktor’s new trainer, Bruce, gave him a room in his 3 bedroom apartment. That’s how he met you. You helped maintain the gym. Chores here and there, but nothing major. You were in school and needed a little extra cash. Plus, Bruce was a friend of your family so you actually thought it would be cool to work for him. Especially, since your parents lived in another state. You came by the apartment, bringing by food and some new gear for Viktor.

Viktor thought you were beautiful. He didn’t get to be around girls much and matter of fact, he was still a virgin. He may have been a big bad boxer and intimidating to everyone else. However, he lacked some social skills. He was reserved growing up and Ivan kept him disciplined. Of course, Viktor couldn’t talk to girls. So when he saw you, he was easily smitten. 

You were very nice to him. One of the kindest people he had ever met. You always smiled and asked him how his day was. You seemed genuinely interested in him. You even tried learning short phrases in Russian. Of course, your pronunciation was terrible and he’d try to correct you each time.

“I don’t think I’ll ever get it right.” you sighed.

“Just like I had to train every day, you just need practice.” Viktor said.

You nodded. “I guess so.” 

Viktor got this flutter in his heart. If he didn’t ask you now, he might not ever get the chance. “May I ask something?”

“Sure, what is it?” you said. Viktor opened his mouth to speak, however, he was interrupted by Bruce calling you over something urgent. “I’m sorry. Let’s catch up before you leave.” You rushed off before he could give a response to help Bruce. 

Viktor didn’t get to catch up with you that day. You had disappeared to run errands and he was hurt by it. He wanted to get you alone. He wanted to know you on a deeper level. To experience what he missed on. 

Viktor stood in Bruce’s office after a phone call with a promoter wanting to book him for a fight. They were discussing their options and how hard he wanted to train for this fight. You knocked on the open door, holding a clipboard.

“Yes?” Bruce said, acknowledging you.

Viktor looked at you and shuddered. He couldn’t look at you and think about you without his heart skipping beats. His desire grew for you by the day. He looked at you and turned to look down at the floor. 

“I just need you to sign this so I can fax it back to the insurance company.” you said, entering the small office. You needed to squeeze by Viktor, accidentally rubbing your ass across his pelvis as you passed by him. Viktor fought not to gasp at the shock that went through him. 

You leaned over the desk, giving Viktor a good look at your ample ass. His heart started to race as he stared. He wanted to look away but, he couldn’t. Viktor envisioned you without your clothes. Your jeans may have been tight, but he wanted to see you without your clothes.

Viktor started to feel the blood rush down south. He unfolded his arms and tucked his hands into the front pocket of his sweatshirt and pulled down over where he felt himself growing. You stood up and turned to leave. You smiled at Viktor and passed back through the small space between the desk and Viktor, brushing up against him again. Viktor watched you go by, savoring you brushing up against his erection again and thankful you didn’t pay much attention.

“So, about this match?” Bruce said.

Viktor turned abruptly, coming out of his lustful trance. “Yes. Schedule it.” Viktor rushed to say. “We can talk later.” Viktor awkwardly left the office and retreated to the men’s locker room’s restroom. He grunted as he pulled his shorts down, letting his member spring out.

Viktor couldn’t help but to stroke himself. You flooded his mind. He tried running back over what it felt like with you up against him. Your warmth and the roundness of your ass. He hissed as he stroked faster. He cursed in Russian. His eyes fell closed and his head tilted back. With the locker room empty, he could grunt and moan all he wanted. He imagined having you all to himself. Naked, spread across his bed and calling his name.

Viktor felt his seed rise within him. He began to pump himself faster, growling as his orgasm neared. He put one hand on the wall of the stall to balance himself as he leaned forward. He felt his body lock up as he shot his load on the wall. 

Viktor took deep breaths as he released his member. Though the orgasm felt good, he didn’t feel whole. He still needed you. He was going to make it a goal to have you. He wanted to lose this part of himself to you. You were perfect.

For days and weeks, Viktor would stare at you. The swing in your hips as you walked, the way your breasts bounced sometimes when you’d walk. He bit his lip several times while he stared at your ass when you walked. Once, you bent over while wearing leggings. Viktor watched as the fabric stretch, giving him a glimpse of the lavender thong you wore that day. Numerous times he had to make trips to the locker room to release himself in order to continue his workouts. 

Viktor couldn’t take it much more. You distracted him and motivated him at the same time. You were beautiful and he wanted you. His penis ached to be inside you, for your to squeeze around him. He wanted to have you anyway he could. He couldn’t get you alone at any time. However, he promised himself that he’d have you. If the chance presented itself, he was going to lose his virginity to you.

Viktor came in from an evening run. He was a bit lost that he hadn’t been able to catch you. He heard you were busy with a number of tests and essays so, you weren’t going to be around much. But, imagine his surprise and joy when he came back to Bruce’s apartment and found your suitcase in the living room.

“Y/N is on semester break. So instead of flying home, she’ll be crashing with us.” Bruce said, from his chair. 

“Where is she now?” Viktor asked.

“She’s using the guest shower. You may have to wait if you were going to try and wash up.” Bruce said.

Viktor shrugged as Bruce’s phone rang. He looked at his text messages and growled. “That’s the neighbor. Someone threw a brick through the fucking window at the gym.” he said.

“Do you want me to go with you?” Viktor said.

“No. Stay here. You guys figure out dinner.” Bruce said as he got up and fetched his kiss and his coat. Bruce rushed out of the door without another word. Viktor hoped everything would be okay with the gym. But there was something more immediate. His head turned towards the sound of the shower on. 

Viktor traveled down the hall and stood at the door. It was cracked with steam, flowing out. Music was playing from your phone that you were singing to. Viktor pushed the door open a bit more, giving himself plenty of view. The glass may have been slightly fogged, but he could still see what he wanted to see. He almost gasped, looking at you. He imagined where he wanted to place his hands on you. Viktor may have been very inexperienced, but he knew what he wanted to do with you. 

Viktor felt himself getting hard again. He rubbed himself through his track pants. He watched you rub yourself with the towel. Lathering yourself up and washing yourself off. But what surprised him even more was when you began to rub your breasts. You moaned at the sensation. The heat from the shower amplifying your arousal. Your hand traveled down to your sex.

You rubbed your clit as you rest one foot on the bench of the shower. You moaned as your fingers roamed all-around your folds. You rolled your nipple between your fingers of your other hand as your middle finger dipped into yourself.

Viktor’s eyes fixating on you. He wasn’t moving from that spot. He pulled himself out and started to stroke himself. He grunted quietly while he watched you. He stroked himself to the same rhythm of your circling your clit. In his head, you were doing this for and with him. Both of you together. He didn’t know what you were thinking about, but he hoped you were thinking of him. He hoped you fantasized about him the way he did you. Viktor wanted you to want him the way he wanted you.

Your moans got louder. Your fingers moved in and out of you at a faster pace. You rubbed over your g-spot over and over. “Yes.” you moaned. “Fuck.”

Viktor grunted along with you. His precum spread over his shaft, making things more slippery. He pushed his pants down further, letting his balls free. They were heavy, needing to unload. It would be a waste to let loose now, but he needed an immediate release. Your moans motivated him. As you worked yourself faster, so did he. 

You braced yourself against the wall as you felt the pressure built up. You bit your lip, muffling your moans. You jerked as you felt yourself coming undone. Your skin felt the immense chill as you came. You cried out as the rush flowed through you.

Viktor stroked himself as you finished. He couldn’t contain himself. Even calling your name as he climaxed and spilling his seed on the door and the wood floor. You didn’t even hear him. 

You both took deep breaths together as you calmed down. You didn’t know that Viktor was breathing along with you. You retreated back under the water to do a last rinse. Viktor tucked himself back into his track pants and hurried to find a napkin to clean his mess.

You stepped out of the shower to dry off. You noticed the door was more open than you left it. You shrugged it off while drying your goddess locs. You got dressed in your pajama shorts and a cami then exited with your things.

“What the hell?” You said. The bottom of your foot felt wet. You picked up your foot to see some liquid. You thought you had dried off your feet when you got out of the shower. Plus, whatever was on the floor didn’t look like water. You wiped your foot off and dried the floor, forgetting it and going to the other guest room and putting your phone in the charger.

You came back into the kitchen and found Viktor standing against the counter. He looked like we was waiting on you when you walked in. “Hey. When did you get in?” You asked.

“A while ago.” He said.

“Did you have a good run?” You asked.

Viktor nodded. “It was nice. What about your tests?”

“Ugh, I’m just glad they are over. I need this break!” You said, going to the fridge. You didn’t see anything appetizing when you opened it. “How do you feel about Thai food?” 

You peeked over the other side of the fridge door to see Viktor had moved and was now just on the other side. “That’s fine.” 

You realized how much bigger Viktor was compared to you. He was glaring down at you and you couldn’t tell if you were intimidated or turned on. You closed the fridge and backed away. Viktor took a step closer, not putting too much distance between you two.

“So. I’m going to order it online. I know a place that’s not too far.” You said.

“How was your shower?” Viktor said, looking up and down. He glared at your legs. The shea butter you put on made it shine and made you smell amazing. 

You were a bit confused at the abrupt question. You chuckled nervously. “What?”

“Your shower? Did you enjoy it?” He asked again locking eyes with you.

“Why are you…” you asked.

“I did.” Viktor said. You froze in place.

“What are you talking about?” You said. Did Viktor see you? Why would he ask you about your shower?

Viktor stepped toward you, backing you up. His demeanor was different. He felt cold. It wasn’t the face he would put on during his fights. This look was something more dangerous.

“I saw you, Y/N.” He said. “You needed satisfaction. To feel something. Just how I want to.”

“Viktor, the hell are you talking about?” You said. 

Viktor walked closer to you. You stepped back until you hit the wall. He didn’t stop. He got so close that you could smell his stink from his run. You looked up at him with a chill running down your spine.

“You’re too close.” You said.

“I’ve been wanting you for a long time.” Viktor said, his accent thick and heavy. “I’ve never had anyone. I didn’t get to have that opportunity. But now, I have a chance and I’m going to take it.”

“What are you doing?” You said as Viktor grabbed your wrists. You tried snatching away from him, but he was so much stronger than you. You kicked at his knees, only for him to move away from you, but then press himself against you. You whimpered as he captured both of your wrists in one hand and kept them above your head. One hand clasped over your mouth when you were about to let out a yell. 

“Ssssh.” He said. “We don’t want to ruin this for each other. Our first time doesn’t need to be a struggle.”

You tried shaking your head, but Viktor had you in his grip. Viktor gave you one more warning before his hand left your mouth and traveled down to your shorts. You whimpered and were about to protest when he kissed you. The kiss was sloppy and wet. You tried to pull away, but Viktor was not going to break from this kiss. You tried closing your legs, but Viktor put his thigh in between you so you were straddling him. His middle finger teased your clit. You tried to think about anything, but the pleasure, however, you couldn’t ignore it. 

Viktor broke the kiss to lick your neck. His movements felt uncoordinated and rough. “Viktor, stop.” you said. He ignored you, but he figured by your objection he wasn’t doing something right. He pulled away a little bit and pulled down your shorts, giving his large hands so more space. He dipped back into your folds, drawing circles on your clit. 

You pressed your head back into the wall and bite your lip, muffling a moan. 

“Tell me you like it.” Viktor said. You whimpered, shaking your head. Viktor pressed against you again. “Y/N, say you like it.”

Viktor repeated it like he was looking for reassurance. And in truth, he was. He didn’t want his first time to be him not pleasing you. What was worse was that he was doing good. You had slowly started to get wet. Your hips moved forward, following Viktor’s hand.

“Does it feel good?” He asked again.

You whimpered, nodding. “Yes. But, we can’t do this.”

“I’ve never felt this way with anyone. I want to share what I feel with you.” Viktor said before going in for another kiss.

You tried fighting against it, but his tongue slipped into your mouth. It roamed the inside of your mouth, sloppily but for some reason, it aroused you more. You felt your orgasm building up, despite your protest to your body. Your nipples hardened in your top.

Viktor broke the kiss again and pulled his hand out from between your thighs. You gasped in relief, but you knew he wasn’t done. Viktor roughly grabbed your left breast. He grunted as he pulled the neck of it down, exposing you. There was a sting as he pinched your nipple. He sighed as he leaned down to leave a trail of kisses on your breasts and down to your nipple. 

You moaned at the feel of his tongue wrapping around your nipple and him sucking it. You didn’t think it was possible for him to make you any wetter. Viktor used his free hand to continue to play with it, massaging and rolling your breast and moving to suck on the other. 

“Viktor.” You gasped. You felt like you could come from this alone. You had sex before, but it was all mediocre and having to finish yourself. Even though Viktor was very rough and uncoordinated, you felt as if your body was responding to him in a way it never had before. You weren’t pushing against him anymore and you could barely fight him as is.

Once he came up, Viktor brought you into another short kiss. You felt something him poking against your thigh and your pussy clenched in excitement. He pulled you off the wall and picked you up. He laid you across the island of the kitchen. It was at the perfect height where your pelvis could meet his. Viktor pulled down his pants and underwear to his ankles. You looked at his dick. His tip a bright red and his shaft swollen and riddled with veins with a wicked curve. You whimpered as Viktor brought you towards him. 

You opened your mouth to say something, but Viktor kissed you. Another sloppily kiss that left a trail of spit as he pulled away. “You’re so perfect for my first time.” he moaned. He grabbed the base of his member and pushed inside you.

You gasped at the delicious stretch. You wanted to protest, but you knew that there would be no stopping him. Viktor moaned as he entered you, going further and further. You flattened on the island top as he dragged across your walls. It only made you wetter. Once he was sheathed inside you completely with his balls pressed against you, he pulled himself out.

“So warm. So wet.” Viktor said. He started with slow sloppy strokes. Trying to find his rhythm and pace. “Очень жарко. Такая мокрая.” he repeated.

You moaned as Viktor found a comfortable pace. Viktor’s eyes fixated on your breasts as they bounced from his movements. Pleasure came up in surges. You began to clench around him. Viktor looked down to see his member covered in your arousal. Your soft pants told him to go faster. You began to arch your back, your hands finding a place on his shoulders. 

Viktor leaned in, his breath tickling your face. “You feel so good around me, Y/N. I’ve wanted you for so long.”

You couldn’t respond as you became spent. Your moans were now hoarse and raspy. You began to scratch at Viktor’s back as you pushed him against him. Viktor grunted in your ear as he shook. You tried holding in your moans, but as Viktor hit the spongy more sensitive parts of you it was harder to stay silent. He chipped away at any resistance. You clenched and gripped around him. Viktor moaned as he began to twitch inside you. “I’m going to come.”

“Viktor, wait.” you moaned as your own orgasm built up. You felt yourself beginning to spasm as the start of your release.

“No. I’m going to come inside you, baby.” Viktor said, his head lifting towards the ceiling. You gasped as you felt a rush coming for you. An immense force coming over you that radiated from your core. To accompany it, Viktor went still, his muscles locking up. You felt the spurts of his orgasm painting your walls. You contracted around him, milking him for the rest of his orgasm. 

Viktor finally calmed down and pulled out. Your ejaculate and his spilling out of you. You leaned up and tried moving your legs in. You groaned as your hips ached from your legs being held open. You groaned and took deep breaths. You looked up at Viktor who glared at you. “Finally, I’ve had you.” he said.

[cozyteez]

Hii, do u have any tips for writing fics?? I’m so used to writing research reports, lab reports, and formal essays that creative writing has become something I really struggle with. I guess it’s having the freedom to write anything and not knowing how to make sure it’s not corny. I tried outlining a fic one time but it was so frustrating LOLOLOL. Anyways, I love your ateez fics. They are so cute and creative!!

hi !!!! im like rlly touched u asked me and i feel u actually that's why i started this blog; im a biomedical engineering major so as u can imagine i dont get to take much creativity with what i write because writing papers and reports and proposals are so formulaic and u gotta stick to the facts so that being said i actually tested out of all my college writing classes so all my writing knowledge is from ap english in hs lmao so take it w many grians of salt

the #1 thing i do when im feeling sort of unmotivated about a story or maybe like like dragging myself thru mud to write it is to just write the "fun" part first. to me the fun part is usually the climax or maybe the like the "wouldn't it be cute if..." moment that came to mind that inspired me to write a blurb in the first place! then usually once i sort of get the ball rolling on that my brain will help me out and keep the momentum going by thinking of maybe "oohh okay maybe this can happen next" or "oohh and what if this led up to it" or !! just stop there !! something ive learned from my mx writing blog which is like a year older than this one was that you don't owe anybody context especially for a blurb so maybe it really is just 3 sentences of a cute moment u thought of like its whatever ur the one writing it

now for longer fics im going to be honest jongho's first love is my first and only completed attempt at a multi stage coherent story. and that was fueled purely based on the fact that when i look at jongho he just gives off sort a really excited sort of innocence that i wanted to further explore and personify through the idea of him experiencing love for the first time but even then i really struggled w the last part because that's where my personal experience stopped and i had basically nothing to go off of because ive never been in love so i did have to kinda wait for ideas to come to me. for prince yunho i have posted 4 chapters but have all the way through chapter 15 drafted. and by drafted i mean it's like 3 sentences of the overall idea. again, the fic was inspired by the duality between yunho's on stage vs. off stage persona where if somebody was to watch an ateez performance for the first time they may find him very serious and maybe even intimidating but atiny would know that his off stage persona (the one he choses to create for us anyways) is very silly and happy-go-lucky and approachable, which is why prince yunho is seen as narameth's strong and stoic pride and joy but in reality he's sort of clumsy but means well. so i let that and his relationship w xenia who is an original character (OC) sort inspire stories or interactions that i force into a plot line. so for example i believe when i first started thinking abt a prince au for yunho i thought "wouldn't it be funny if the first scene started out painting him as this strong and serious man and then cut to him choking on food or something" and that sort of inspired the idea of him being nervous abt the speech and then xenia came out of that because he needed a complementary character imo since i knew he was gonna be kind of one dimensional and then his backstory with xenia inspired other ideas and then one day i was sad and wanted a hug so that inspired a piece of the plot line and so on. so basically: let an idea or even an aspect of somebody come to you and just write it down, let it inspire other ideas. and don't be afriad to completely start over. i wrote a whole chapter for prince yunho and deleted the whole thing because i hated where it was going and started back from scratch. sometimes you have to revisit things abt your characters and their relationships with others to get a new idea. there's a story in every person and every relationship you just have to find the clues

here's an example of what i mean by "write the good part first". this is typically what the very first draft of a blurb will look like for me

((( blah blah blah basically its raining and y/n is sad bc wooyoung broke her heart two weeks ago idk maybe go into it maybe not)))

y/n is all sad and feeling sorry for themselves on the couch theyre past crying but still feel pretty shitty plus it's storming and cold outside. great

there's a knock on their door ofc they have the cliche "who could that be moment" even tho they lowkey know. we literally all know

so yeah wooyoung's there soaked in rain eyes puffy y/n thinks he's been crying

-this would be the "fun part". i'll fix all that garbage up top later or maybe even change it completely idk yet-

"y/n? i - uh. hi"

he sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck while you crossed your arms over your chest, fighting the urge to close the door and walk away for good

"hi? really wooyoung? is that the best you can do?"

(((wooyoung does smth idk)))

"well i just -"

"you just what? showed up here in the rain after you broke my heart and didn't even bother to tell me why? this isn't some romance movie, asshole. you can't just come here late at night and expect to find me all sad and willing to take you back because i'm not. so say what you're gonna say so i can get back to my life"

your face was red hot and you trying very hard, probably too hard, to fight back tears. ((( idk talk some more abt y/n's emotions then what wooyoung is doing)))

"look, i made a mistake i-"

"oh my god! why did i know you were gonna do this. i just knew as soon as i saw you-"

"will you let me get a fucking word in!?"

well that was new. in the entire time you'd known him he had never raised his voice at you like that, your shock causing you to immediately close your mouth and fold your arms back into yourself (((make y/n seem more scared))) noticing your reaction, he lowered his voice back down and instictively reached for you, heartbroken at the way you jerked away from his touch

"please y/n, i'm sorry. i didn't mean to raise my voice it's just that i need to tell you that i regret what i did i regret breaking up with you so fucking much and you don't have to take me back i just need you to know how much you meant, no, mean to me. i still love you, a lot. there's not a day, an hour, a minute, or a single second that goes by that i'm not thinking of you"

"then why?"

your voice was small and wavering, your tears now dangerously close to spilling down your cheeks

"why what?"

"why did you break up with me like that, just all of a sudden"

he pushed his hands into his pockets and looked away

"because that morning i woke up before you and when i looked at you asleep next to me, i saw myself spending the rest of my life with you and it scared the shit out of me"

"why did it scare you?"

"because i just figured you didn't feel the same. i was selfish and wanted to save myself heartbreak down the line and so i told you i didn't wanna be with you anymore, but that was a mistake because it turns out i can't function with out you, i can't breathe without you i can't live without you, y/n. i shouldn't have let you go"

tears were now freely flowing down your face (((okay brain no work anymore y/n kisses him duh and then ofc they make up wooyoung prob says smth cheesy and y/n is like ur lucky i love you or smth ahaha the end)))

tl;dr -> don't be afraid to get messy. creative writing is not nearly as structured as academic/scientific writing. write whatever u want first it can even be the middle of a huge fight scene or some dialogue u think is funny. if ur stuck read what you have or maybe just take a break and let an idea come to you. a story doesnt have to come together til the very end so it can be as messy and out of order as u want until u wanna post it. also i would always use the third person omniscient point of view for a longer story like a chaptered fic as a default and only change if it would impact the plot in a negative way. this is where the narrator knows what every character is thinking/feeling and im p sure a teacher in middle school told me it was the easiest to write and follow

[armandyke]

hallo here are the hc's i whipped up for the teacher au!! i'm sorry this turned into an essay i'm just a dumbass who loves soft teacher au a lot!!

“not sure what the others would teach in this teacher au tho-” *wakes up in the dead of night with cold sweat* *kicks down the door* I HAVE SOME THOUGHTS!!

oh boy…get ready….cause it’s A LOT

- Submitted by @katgreeves

luther: physics teacher, cause you know…spaceboy……everyone is scared at the beginning of the year when they get him as a teacher cause he’s TALL AND HUGE AS FUUUUUCK, but then fast forward two months later and everyone is chill because turns out he’s a really easygoing and soft teacher…just really socially awkward and lowkey dumb sometimes

asshole kids in his classes use his softness to his disadvantage and pull pranks on him constantly, poor guy….the other kids tho always tell them to shove it tho because he may be soft and dumb and socially awkward but he’S OUR SOFT AND DUMB AND SOCIALLY AWKWARD TEACHER DON’T TOUCH HIM!! the first time they protected him he had to remind himself not to tear up because HE FELT SO LOVED!!!! 

he gets them snacks even if they’re not supposed in the science classrooms because “eXPeriMENts and CHEmIcALsSsSsssSS!!!” and will rant for hours about space and starts and THE MOOOOON cause when he was a kid he always wanted to be an astronaut ( :’))))))) ) and his kids get fed up one day and go “why don’t you just make an astrology club mr luther????” and he does and IT’S A REAL SUCCESS WITH THE SCHOOL BODY YAY!!!

(five when he grows up also becomes a physics teacher and pesters luther all the time like “I AM 10 TIMES THE TEACHER YOU EVER WERE-” “NO YOU AREN’T STFU” and he’s technically wrong and right because material wise??? yes he’s 100% the better teacher and he always has answers to the kids questions and teaches them extra content cause he’s always been a genius but as a physics teacher that kids really like????? no siree that title goes to luther because he was a soft teddy bear to his students and they trusted him while five is eccentric and strict the the point where his kids are scared the FUCK out of him)

diego: pe teacher, SWEARS SO MUCH IN FRONT OF THE KIDS IN CLASS OMG HOW IS HE NOT FIRED YET?? is tough on the kids sometimes so push harder but IS ALSO SOFT AND REALLY ENCOURAGING THE KIDS TO WORK AND TRY THEIR BEST BECAUSE HE BELIEVES IN THEM!!! (except for the group of cocky assholes he’ll get in every class and don’t want to listen to them…he has personally removed their rights in the class)

whenever the self-defense unit comes around he’s sooooo dedicated to it and makes sure that the kids master everything to a t, cause who knows when it might come in handy??? he wants to make sure that the kids know how to protect themselves as the world is a shitty place and you never know when shit will go bad (except he does…he’s had enough bullshit and scared happen to him and has gotten involved in so many fights that he wants to make sure that the kids won’t hurt like him :“’))))))))) ) 

he’s a secret softie that will protect the kind kids that are not as good at pe and get bullied by the cocky assholes in the class becAUSE THAT’S JUST WHAT HE WOULD DO NO IM NOT SELF PROJECTING OF WHAT I WANTED OUT OF MY PE TEACHERS SHUT U-

also eudora is a pe teacher and the two of them are very competitive to be the best pe teacher and this rivalry turns into playful flirting and big ass crushes that they’re way too stubborn to admit, the entire school still ships it anyways (the entire school also ships klaus and dave because gay rights!!!!!)

allison: either school counselor or principal i can’t decide because she can be super kind and open to talk and gives advice that helps a LOT but she’s also a hbic THAT CAN AND WILL run the place. 

anyways, whatever job she has, she also helps with the drama club and school plays, and literally every year the theatre kids BEG HER to kick out the current drama teachers and replace them because allison>>>>>>>>>>>> all of the existing drama teachers there  

ben: is either a literature or philosophy teacher. super smart and knowledgable but is also really laid back and fun to talk to. he’s got a dark and snarky sense of humor and his students always have sass battles with him. the number of INSANE inside jokes his students and him share is HUGE.

HE DEMANDS THAT HIS STUDENTS PARTAKE IN READING TIME IN THE BEGINNING OF CLASS NO MATTER WHAT THEY HAVE TO DO BECAUSE READING IN AN IMPORTANT SKILL AND HOBBY FOR DEVELOPMENT AS A READER, WRITER, LEARNER, AND OVERALL PERSON AND NO AMY DON’T ROLL YOUR EYES AT ME I’M THE TEACHER HERE AND I SAID NO ELECTRONICS SO PUT THE GODDAMN PHONE AWAY BEFORE I COME OVER THERE AN-

anyways…he is really considerate to what students need and makes them as relaxed as possible because school is HELL. students LOOOOOVE HIM. HE’S THE ONE TEACHER BESIDES DAVE THAT LITERALLY EVERYONE LIKES. (highkey inspired by my philosophy and lit teachers because they’re also really smart but sassy and cool like ben and I JUST THINK THEY’RE NEAT)

vanya: strings orchestra teacher for obvious reasons. she was real shy at first when she first got hired but the the strings department at that time was soooo small and crappy that she went “oh HELL no,” rolled up her sleeves, and set to revitalize it just because she cares about music so much.

she recruited more students, got more advanced music so the kids could feel a challenge and be motivated to improve, and collaborated with the choir and band departments to provide more clubs, events and opportunities outside of class for kids to do music.

she is a no business type of teacher when it comes to arrogant people that put other players down or people who don’t practice and goof around and will snap at them SO HARD because everyone needs to be at their a game for a concert and in an orchestra no single person is bigger that the collective. she’s however SOOOO SOFT with really soft playing and shy kids because she understands how it feels when you think your playing isn’t good enough, so gives them extra help, gives them solo lines or solos to play so they gain more confidence in themselves, all while constantly giving encouraging words about how much they’ve improved that always makes them feel better and more motivated to improve.

she’s an absolute anxious and cranky maniac a week before the concert but she throws parties with food, drinks, and games afterwards to celebrate with her kids. she constantly gets them to play music related games and challenges that they do as a class for team bonding to make things more entertaining in class. she makes dumb music puns a lot too! 

she also will in the class say crazy stories of her childhood and the crazy shit she and her siblings did and then somehow always relate it back to the lesson and make it some sage advice…the kids never understand how she does it

(me???? self projecting more of my teachers into this au cause they’re cool??? more likely than you think)

also one day she chops her hair real short and cute and the conversation with her students basically went like this:

students: miss vanya you cut your hair???

vanya: yes kids I’m a lesbian

students: !!!!!!!!!!!!

vanya: ;))))))))

students: MISS VANYA SAID GAY RIGHTS!!!!

vanya: HELL YE I DID!!!

bonus grace yayyyy!!!!!: is the school nurse…she’s so sweet, so soft….has precisely whatever people need when they feel sick/injured…helps them calm down in they’re freaking out…always has a couple of beds in the nurse’s office so people can lie if they feel dizzy…gives out candy/sweets/food to people so they feel better!!

diego meets her a lot because a lot of kids in his class gets injuries and he takes them to the nurse and he jUST LOVES HER SM!!! INSTANT MOM FIGURE!! THEY TALK AND JOKE AND LAUGH TOGETHER AND GRACE WILL ALWAYS GIVE HIM A PASTRY SHE MADE WHENEVER HE COMES BY AND HE JUST IS SO SOFT AROUND HER ITS GREAT (his students find his sudden change in his demeanour amusing “hey mr diego is nurse grace your MMMmoooOoOooOOOmMMMMMMmmmmmM??” “kid your a good one but say that shit to me one more time and I will beat the sh-”)

she always has a smile on her and everyone LOVES HER…..except for the administration that always want to get her fired because they are assholes and they think she’s too weird to stay. however, every time they try to fire her, a certain teacher comes by the office for what they claim is a civil discussion...and after an hour of yelling, death threats, and the door getting 10 knife marks they go “you know what grace…you can stay" 

those assholes are persistant though, and one time though not even a certain teacher could get them away from firing her so once the news breaks out that nurse grace is leaving the whole school is FURIOUS and throws a 1 week riot and the administration get so scared and tired that they just go "OK WERE SORRY JUST KIDDIN- OK OK SHE’S STAYING FOR GOOD JESUS”

grace is so grateful that she makes a whole bunch of cake for everyone and everyone with tears in their eyes just goes “this…is why we love you sm nurse mom”

~~okkkieee that’s the end of it sorry it’s a literal essay I just got very passionate about this au lmao rip!!! I’m slowly tempted to write a fic about it even though i’ve never written a fic before in my LIFE and I already have like 3 other au fic ideas in my head already smh

[langernameohnebedeutung]

suzuwarahikaru replied to your post “what happens at 5 am?”

where is the essay, OP!?

@suzuwarahikaru​ Honestly, it’s drivel and I didn’t feel like it particularly went anywhere and it was just me monologuing about one aspect of a bigger question so that’s why I didn’t post it. But ok, just for some context: You probably know how the MCU was often criticised for having “bland one off villains” and that’s true especially in their early films - and that was time when Heath Ledger’s Joker loomed very large and Ian McKellen was famous for his performance of Magneto and the idea for a Magneto solo film had just been scrapped in favour of XM First Class. At that point apparently the MCU guys walked up with the demand that Thor 1 only has to give them 1 thing: A villain as good as Magneto which they could use in Avengers. Now, obviously it had to be Loki, because Loki is Thor’s most famous antagonist and he was the first guy the Avengers ever fought in the comics, and Loki in Thor 1 is satisfyingly complex - but now that Loki’s dead and has a solo show coming out in a while, people dug up that old quote and started arguing about whether Loki actually became a villain “as good as Magneto” - which I honestly wouldn’t care about, except this argument spilled a few  “But Loki is great and Magneto is boring”-posts into the Magneto tag a while ago (which mixes with a lot of: Why did Cherik get a happy end but Stucky didn’t that’s so unfair!!!! posts) and then some comments started lowkey implying that Loki is a character who’s more attractive to sophisticated fans and that Magneto fans are usually men and Loki fans women (with the not so subtle implication being that Magneto fans are comic dude bros who like him for his cool powers and because he’s a Bad Guy(TM) I don’t really care about that, but over the course of this argument someone made a rather interesting post, wondering about what “went wrong” with Loki and while I love Loki as a character and as a villain, it made me ponder what could have been done to make Loki (even) better and to help him stand on his own 2 feet as a character and this was their post:

Now and this was going to be my response: Personally, I don’t think that having spectacular powers or anything make a villain good (they make good visuals though) but whether the hero learns something from fighting them, whether their motivation maybe reflects something that we experience as well and that maybe they unmask something that we usually don’t feel comfortable to address. And Loki has all these qualities.

I’m not going to try to objectively pinpoint where it ‘went wrong’ but it’s actually interesting to look at the XMCU and the MCU and to compare notes. The XMCU is often criticised for being too wordy, too slow-paced and “what’s with the constant time jumps and decade-hopping?” But I think that’s something the Thor franchise could actually have profited from, because…these guys are immortals and it just feels rushed in my opinion to watch their world fall apart in what is for them a matter of a long weekend. 

For example, a bigger distance between the events of Thor 1 and Avengers would have lent more weight to Loki’s disappearance and Thanos torturing and brainwashing him, Thor’s and Jane’s relationship would have been given more time to develop (making their reunion in Thor 2 more meaningful). They could also have given her more time exploring Asgard/battling the Ether. We could have learnt more about the Dark Elves, the Frost Giants, the Nine Realms in general. 

And that’s at least part of the problem, in my opinion: We don’t know enough about Asgard. You can’t just throw in an alien word without world-building and you can’t introduce characters who are millennia old by showing us 6 years of their lives and maybe 1 flashback. There is a reason why a show like Good Omens spent basically an entire episode on Crowley and Aziraphale’s lives through the millennia. Captain America got a film set in the WW2, Wolverine Origins covers over a century of Logan’s story. Magneto isn’t a better (or worse) villain than Loki, because as you said, the writing makes the character and both get pretty good and pretty bad writing at times. But a big difference is: We know a lot more about Magneto than we know about Loki. 

One example of this is personal relationships. Something I never realised before I started typing this is how little space Loki is given to let him form/have/maintain/test/strengthen meaningful relationships. 

Basically, all his meaningful interactions are inside his family. Magneto (to be clear, I’m bringing up so often bc the MCU apparently insisted on being rude af and asking Kenneth Branagh on drawing inspiration from a character who’s basically the opposite of Loki in every regard) gets a lot more screen time to develop his relationships with other characters, even if it means less CGI action scenes. 

In fact, I’m currently tempted to find out how many 1 on 1 dialogue scenes Loki gets per hour of film vs. how many Magneto gets. Loki enters the picture with a family, ‘friends’, a biological father, servants, an entire kingdom of people who know him, but he barely gets to have any meaningful interactions outside of his family environment. Seeing him interact with a friend or even someone who hates him for reasons unrelated to his relationship with Thor or someone who supports him would in turn show us a lot about how he sees other people, how he sees himself, how he treats them, what he values in a person, what kind of people trusts (if he trusts) – that’s a lot of potential that was left pretty much wasted in my opinion. 

One of the first things Agent of Asgard did was add Verity Willis to its main-cast so have a character for Loki to interact with, to serve as a moral anchor, and to call him out on his bullshit. Having relationships is powerful. In the MCU, Loki’s relationship with his mother is such an important, humanising element to his character. Also a lot of headcanons and metas and thoughts about Loki are inspired by those few scenes where we see him interact with the Warrior’s Three and Sif before Loki finds out about his parentage. 

And even when encounters the Avengers, they meet once, they talk once, then Loki he returns to Asgard and they never meet again, except Bruce - and even then there’s barely any time to talk about what happened in Avengers 1. He doesn’t get to form any meaningful relationships with his adversaries when he talks to them in Av1, these scenes just exist to present the Avengers in a certain light. And in the end it’s canonised that Loki was brainwashed so it’s all pointless anyway. (pls (don’t) make me write an essay on agency and the MCU, because honestly, between Bucky, Gamora, Nebula, Loki and everyone else was brainwashed it’s actually worth a conversation)

Even in Thor 1 Loki never meets Jane or Darcy, one of the main-characters. And we never see a single frost giant after the first film. Erik Solveig is the only Earth character from Thor 1 Loki actually meets and he’s brainwashed for most of that and in Thor 2, they don’t get to meet again. 

Imagine if Loki had had someone he trusted in Thor 1 and told them about finding out he’s a Frost Giant and they reject him and treat him like a monster. This could be three or four scenes that don’t throw off the film but would have been very powerful. Or imagine if Loki keeps his heritage a secret from that friend/trusted person and they find out in Thor 2 and confront him about it. Valkyrie and Loki never talk about him invading her mind or the things he saw. 

We never get to see him alone on Sakaar to deal with what he presumes is the end of his home world and the death of everyone he knows and we never see him interact ‘win the Grandmaster’s trust’. 

We never see him interact with the Hulk before they’re suddenly fighting side by side in Infinity War. We never find out exactly what the Aesir’s sentiments towards him are, what kind of prince he was in the past, how present he is in public, what reputation he has beyond silver-tongue mischief guy and which specific events shaped it.

If the MCU wants a villain “as good as Magneto” (which is already annoying bc they imply that Loki is not as good a villain which is such a subjective measure – Magneto done wrong is a horrible and downright offensive villain and trickster characters done right are amazing for revealing the flaws of a hero.*) then they have to give writers and actors the same means to do that with. The X-Men franchise, for all it flaws, always gave Magneto screen-time (so much that people criticised it). 

There’s a Charles-and-Erik dialogue in pretty much every film, allowing us to follow the state of their eternal argument at every step. We see his friendship with Mystique grow and fall, we see Wolverine call him out on his bullshit, his attempt to make young Hank and Mystique feel better about their visible mutations, we know how he treats his followers, his new recruits, his enemies, his students, his wife and his daughter, (daughters, if we count The Gifted and his legacy), his colleagues, his lovers, his ex-lovers, allies and former allies, politicians, police, prison guards, Nazis, soldiers, insane Egyptian gods – and we get to learn his feelings and thoughts about all of these through personal interactions, decisions and gestures. And in turn we know how they feel about Magneto. What do we know about Loki’s feelings about people outside his family? How does he feel about Fandral? What are his thoughts on the Valkyrior? How did his views on Frost Giants change and when? Did he challenge them at all or did he just become cynical about them? 

As I said, Loki is a formidable villain but I think that he suffers from the same problem as many MCU characters: We hardly know them. Think about Natascha whose been part of the franchise since Iron Man 2 but we hardly know anything about her. How much do we know about the family Drax lost? Or about Wanda’s family? About Pepper’s private life? We hardly know anything about them and especially when characters are thousands of years old and we know nothing about their past, it really creates a gaping hole in their biography and that really leads back to my original point: If we could spend more time with them, we would know them better and care more. One of the reason Dark Phoenix is a bit under-whelming is because we know very little about Jean and Scott in this time line. 

There are two DCEU films I actually own and watched more than once: Wonder Woman and Aqua Man. And while I personally didn’t find Aqua Man that good, this film actually tells us a lot about him and despite my lack of knowledge about the DCEU and me being a giant Marvel nerd, I preferred Wonder Woman over Captain Marvel and that is because I felt closer to her character. It really boils down to a “show don’t tell issue” and for me, that would mean: Maybe fewer giant CGI battles. more people living their lives. *(which should also highlight why setting Magneto as a mark for K.B. is so off-mark. Loki is about unmasking hypocrisy, Magneto himself is a hypocrite who regards himself as a hero but often does immoral things and that for example gets unmasked by Wolverine, another social outsider with littl care for social conventions)

[lettersfromn0where]

Star Wars marathon semi-live-blog: Ep. V

So. Last night, I decided on a whim to rewatch every single Star Wars movie for the first time since I was seven this Christmas break. As I knew I’d have many things to say about this, I started messaging @marypoppinswasmyfatherbitches about my opinions and observations while watching Episode IV. She apparently thought they were amusing because she told me (several times, ily) that I should live blog, and i was already halfway through last time but wanted to do it, so I guess I’m doing so now. So, to everyone who questions why this entirely unnecessary liveblog of “The Empire Strikes Back” even exists...let’s just call it a Christmas gift for my ever-encouraging tumblr pal. (Is it a liveblog if you wait until the very end to post your collected thoughts? Nah? Maybe?)

Wow, I really was BABY when I saw this last. Literally, I was in second grade. I’m now just months from my high school graduation. What the heck? This is gonna seem so different than it did then...

I like the opening crawl way better sans weird capitalization.

I’m not sure why the tauntaun noises are such a mood, but they are.

17-year-old me is now remembering that 7-year-old me 100% had a baby crush on OG Trilogy Luke and I really don’t know how to feel about that. I guess I thought he was pretty...?

Peak romance: protracted gazes across a room.

“I can arrange that. You could USE a good kiss!” GOSH, THIS BICKERING IS PERFECTION. Again. Peak romance. I definitely was not able to appreciate that as a second grader but now it’s kind of the best.

HOW IS LUKE STILL CONSCIOUS IF HE’S BEEN UPSIDE DOWN FOR HOURS? Also this cave scene is lowkey incredibly tense for a few seconds.

I have no clue why but the way people fall over in these movies always cracks me up.

Snow planet makes me really freaking glad that I live in SoCal.

Chewbacca’s vocalizations sound like my Labrador’s and I’m not sure what to make of that information.

Literally everyone in this movie looks prettier in snow planet outfits.

The way that tauntaun falls over is an accurate representation of my AP chemistry grade after exams.

Is muttering the same phrases over and over a hypothermia symptom? Because I did not know that if it is, and if not, why the heck is Luke doing that?

“This is Rogue Two” *cries in Rogue One*

This tank thing is REALLY unfortunate. Leave the unconscious person half-naked in front of literally everyone, why don’t ya?

I probably missed something but I’m still not sure where the name “your worship” came from.

“Why you stuck-up, half-witted, scruffy-looking, nerf-herder!” Iconic for a reason.

Ewwwww that kiss is noooooo. (If they weren’t siblings though I would be dying @ his reaction)

I wanna know who sent Chewbacca on a stealth mission. I WANNA KNOW.

Seeing Han and Leia in this makes me wish the other series either had a central romance, or that the one they had was well-written, because it’s one of the best parts of the movie. See, guys? If it’s good, romance can actually enhance the plot of a movie that focuses on something else!

It’s driving me crazy that the AT-AT walkers remind me of some sort of animal but I can’t put my finger on which one.

“Someday, you’re going to be wrong, and I just hope I’m there to see it” is a very underrated line.

The fact that Leia’s immediate reaction to Han doing a stupid and dangerous thing is “you don’t have to do this to impress me!” is my favorite thing ever.

“You said you wanted to be around when I made a mistake...this could be it, sweetheart” -> great payoff of that line earlier. I love it when they circle back to old dialogue. Also adorable that Han remembered she’d said that. (Get you a guy who listens!)

I always feel so bad for droids because they have to be on the outside of the ship, exposed to such harsh conditions. I know they can’t feel things, but I still :(.

Ohp, R2 just gotta YEETED by that Loch Ness monster thing.

“Sorry, sweetheart, I haven’t got time for anything else.” -> she walked right into that one. ALSO. SMOOOOTH.

One of the few things I remembered from my initial watch as a little kid is that I was always freaked out by how you never saw anyone eat onscreen in these movies, to the extent that I wondered if people had to eat in space. (Idk, i was SEVEN.) but there’s an eating scene in this! Vindication for baby me!

I...did not remember Yoda having this much crackhead energy. At all.

The way Han looks at Leia when she calls him a scoundrel! I AM DECEASED

C3PO be out here ruining moments.

Yoda goes from crackhead to wise elder in approximately no seconds. We love.

On a scale of 1 to C3PO, how terrible are you in a crisis?

Worm thing is the stuff of nightmares.

96% sure I just saw a live iguana in the background of that scene. HI, FRIEND!

AND THERE WAS A MONITOR LIZARD! Friends! I love all of the reptile friends on Dagobah :)

This cave fight with the sonshadowing must have been absolutely insane to watch when this first came out.

Guys, i realized...Yoda’s combination of pithy sayings, crackhead energy, and anti-establishment ideals make him seem like a typical midcentury hippie. *writes essay about how Yoda is actually a metaphor for the 1960s countercultural movement*

If this ship levitating scene didn’t inspire your kid self try to use the Force to lift your parents’ car, did you even have a childhood?

R2’s little “REEEEEEE!” screams whenever he gets thrown bring me LIFE.

Okay, Han is enjoying stopping Lando from hitting on Leia WAY too much. (They both are...)

The forehead kiss! In the middle of a fight! PEAK ROMANCE(tm)

“One last kiss before i face certain death” is my absolute favorite and hi this is not okay with me :)

“I love you.” “I know.” I DIED. (@my 11th grade English teacher: I used parallel structure!)

I remember thinking the fight choreography with lightsabers in the last movie was really awkward and it’s WAY better here.

Do lightsabers cauterize the wounds they cause? It would make sense, since people who get stabbed or sliced by lightsabers never seem to bleed.

This falling sequence is the weirdest-looking thing in this movie.

The fact that Lando is the only person in this movie who pronounces “Han” with a short A rather than the long A that everyone else uses bugs me to no end.

I had completely forgotten how iconic this movie was. Off to watch the next one 👀👀

In my defense, I did say this was going to make no sense...

Until next time!

[whatta-babe]

Support| Peter Parker x Reader

Credits to the person who originally posted this blurb that inspired me.

Peter-the-Bean-Parker being like ^^^ when you don't like someone.

Warnings: cussing

Disclaimer: The reader can be very petty, but I wanted this to be as realistic as possible. It doesn't mean that the reader is a mean person, she just is petty, and that's that. Please don't take any offense to it.

• If this little bitch freaking breathes in your direction one more time you're going to lose your shit...

• 'Oregano' is her code name, and approximately 4 people (counting yourself) know about it

• It stems from the villain of The Little Mermaid 2, Morgana, but you had decided that that was too in-your-face

• So Morgana turned into Oregon (yes, like the state) which proceeded to turn into 'Oregano'

• Sigh

• Maybe you shouldn't have made that her name because now your mind is repulsed when you see oregano in the grocery store or in a dish even though you actually like it

• I guess there's no going back now

• The damage has been done

• The tea with this chick is that you guys were actually friends for a while in the beginning

• But then you guys had your British literature class together, and shit started getting real

• You sat next to each other and would talk like any normal friends, but eventually some of the stuff she said started to annoy you

• It was like a spike of annoyance, then nothing, then another spike of rising annoyance

• And then just her opening her mouth was aggravating

• You would eventually snap after a few months of everything building, and it felt nice to call her out on her bs

• But because you didn't have any other friends on your side of the classroom, two days later you had to pretend that nothing happened and talk to her

• It was around this time that the lowkey academic rivalry started

• You are not a math person, a science person, an artistic person

• You read; you write

• Literature is what you're good at, and you are sure as hell not going to allow her to show you up in the class

• So when you have to write an essay, you have her 'proof read' it so she can see your superior word choice, detail, and over-all better paper

• And when you have to write that 1,000 word essay in 2 days and she's talking about how she's only written 500 words, you comfort her and then tell her that you've already finished and turned it in (and of course finish that off by saying, "But it's fine! You'll finish soon")

• Petty stuff like that

• And then also silently gloat (I mean not completely silent- you totally bragged to the bff and bf) when you get student of the week in class before she does

• It was a lot of being frienemies and smiling sweetly at each other and then turning your head away to roll your eyes

• When the semester ended you merrily cut the 'friendship' off by not talking to her again

• It was for the best

• Your boyfriend would be disappointed in you if you slapped her

• And that's what would happen if you had to hear her voice again

• That's why he always wrapped a muscular arm around your waist when you would hear her grating-ass voice somewhere around you to calm restrain you

• Speaking about those sexy arms...

• The handsome boy that those are attached to is none other than your partner, Peter Parker

• You've been dating for a year, and you guys could not be happier

• You guys are so good together and are always having a good time with each other

• You are just what each other needs

• The Yin to your Yang

• The math whiz to your writing genius

• The sweet to your salty

• And boy are you salty

• 93.6% of the time you're a nice girl who helps someone in need, stands up to a bully, compliments someone to make their day a little happier, ect

• And then there's the rest of you that can't help but being a petty hoe

• What can you say? Oregano brings out the worst in you

• And there's literally no real reason for not liking her either

• But once again

• If she so much as looks in this god damn direction again...

°°°

• Poor Peter was in a pickle

• This sweet boy was feeling a little conflicted

• His precious girlfriend, his baby, his sweetheart hates a girl's guts

• For no reason!

• He's still quite confused

• And it's not just him

• He asked Ned about it (one of the three others who knows about Oregano), but the guy is just as clueless as Peter

• "I don't know, man. Couldn't they just bond over building a Star Wars Lego Deathstar or something? Girls are weird, dude."

• He had also tried to recruit Aunt May for some insight

• "Oh! I totally understand where poor Y/N is coming from! I remember this girl in my sophomore class..."

• Yeah. That was a long and boring story that he didn't want to hear

• And May never did actually shed any type of light on the subject

• His only other option was to go to Mr. Stark for advice

• He did have a lot of experience with women after all...

• "H-hey, Mr. Stark. It's me, Peter. Parker. I've got something important that I need to talk to you about, so when you have a chance, can you please call me back? Thanks."

• When Tony heard the voice message 45 minutes later, he was a little panicked

• What could be so important?

• So of course he calls the Spiderling back right then and there

• "Peter! You called."

• "Oh! Um, yeah. Well the thing is is that Y/N, you know my girlfriend? I-I talk about her a lot, and you've met her? Anyway, she doesn't like this girl named Oregano- it's a long story- and it's for pretty much no reason, so I don't know how to act around her- Oregano I mean. And I thought that I should just ask you if you had any advice 'cause you're like my idol- I mean not my idol! Just like... a role model or something... like that...Yeah"

• Tony's trying his hardest not to crack up because this boy is freaking out about this

• And he's also trying to ignore that warm feeling in his chest when he thinks about Peter saying that he's a role model for him

• "Look, kid. This is easy stuff. Women always have that one girl who affects them like that, and the best thing that you can do is support your girlfriend. Because she might have a dumb ass reason to not like her, but you have to support her dumb ass reason."

• "Um"

• "You okay, Parker?"

• "Yea-yeah. So support. I... can do that! Thank you so much, Mr. Stark! I feel so much better now that I know what I have to do!"

• The excited teen hangs up with his dad boss

• Phew! I got this! Tomorrow I'm going to meet with Y/N at school, tell her she looks stunning (because when doesn't she), ace that algebra test, and support her in her hate-fest!

• And now it's Tuesday, and Oregeno is talking which means that his precious baby girl is mad

• And even though his arm is around your waist like normal when you get riled up, it's more for calming and less for restraining you

• But their's still a little bit of extra strength

• Because he doesn't want you getting a detention. Then he would have to get a detention to join you

• His large hand soothingly rubs against your clothed hip, and you shoot him a grateful smile as you peck his cheek in gratitude

• He's always looking out for you

• "Thank you, mon ange"

• Cue the adorable blushing and the shining brown eyes

• And of course the moment is ruined

• Wtf, Oregeno. What. The. Fuck.

• "Heyyy...girly." Cue fake smile

• "Can you please tone it down? Some people are trying to be productive, and you're being really distracting and rude. Thanks!"

• Hair flip

• And it's in this moment where you're being petty and shady to this girl that you hate, when Peter Parker realizes that you're the most amazing girl ever

• Maybe it's the fact that your hair is shining from the light of the windows or the fact that you can be so mean while being so nice, but you could color him impressed

• He knew he had to say something to her

• "Yeah, thanks, bi-"

• Oh shit! He can't disrespect a woman by calling her a bitch! Aunt May would kill him if he wasn't a gentleman. He would kill him if he wasn't! Abort! Abort!

• "-ii-Oregano!"

• "What did you just call me? Oregano?"

• Oh shit