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stellocchia · 4 years ago

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Here’s an analysis of the “Tommy’s Plan To Kill Dream” stream (part 2)

Continuation of this here (though it really isn’t needed to read that one to read this as I will be recapping a bit as I go): https://stellocchia.tumblr.com/post/645995202162671616/heres-an-analysis-of-the-tommys-plan-to-kill

This is the less intense part of the stream. They already talked about their plans to kill Dream (well, Tommy’s plan that Tubbo is VERY reluctant about and Ranboo agrees with). We’re moving into the gathering resources for the surveilance post part now.

As always moving forward I’ll be soley talking about the characters and, for the dialogue, this are the respective colors: Tommy, Tubbo, Ranboo, Ghostbur.

Analysis under the cut as always

So let’s start off with the obvious: I absolutely love how protective Tubbo and Ranboo are of Tommy, I’m glad he has people who actually care in his life right now. We have various examples of this throughout the stream, but the first one is Tommy seeing a creeper, backing off immediatly (because of his hightened fear of pain, aslo known as algophobia apparently) and them immediately destroying the threat. Of course this is also because they don’t want Snowchester blown up, but it’s still sweet nonetheless.

He also opens up about his algophobia right after to them and asks for some armour, which Tubbo actually provides.

“You’re wearing Dream’s armour, aren’t you Tubbo?” “Yeah” “Okay, I wouldn’t- I genuinely would advice not. Anything that that man’s fucking been too near you don’t wanna be using” Tommy’s fear of Dream by now is just all encompassing. It is also quite peculiar that he would say this while still using Dream’s trident (right? It’s still his right?), though that could simply be because he puts himself in the category of “things that have been too near Dream” by now and really can’t be affected more then he already has been, though this is just a theory.

Same thing as with the creeper happens with a skeleton a couple minutes later.

“What happened? Holy crap” “Tubbo he beat me to death, he punched me to death” Bee duo starting to realize how serious Tommy’s situation is right after the scheleton encounter because Tommy was just genuinely panicking.

“Pain it feels so much more real now, ‘cause I know what’s on the other side” “Surely doesn’t that give closure?” “No... no it gives quite the opposite Tubbo” And what a good choice that was narratively speaking! If death did give closure as us and the characters in the story themselves expected, with resurrection it would be meaningless. This way though, death has just as much narrative weight as if resurrection wasn’t there, which is what you want in a story.

“On a side note for you two: Sam Nook great guy! Really lovely guy! Awesamdude is a bastard and does not deserve to be running that prison. If he let me die he failed his job” We can see that Tommy’s perception of the warden’s duty is strickingly different from Sam’s. To Tommy the top priority should be protecting others from Dream (even if it means compromising the security of the prison), while to Sam the top priority is keeping Dream locked up.

“My therapy update!” We all knew I had to include this one. It’s actually really great because:

1) Him actually reacheing out to Puffy to get therapy means that he actually recognises that he needs help and is willing to ask for it, which is the first step towards healing

2) Him acting so happy about it is actually such a good message for the younger viewers to see that therapy is nothing to be afraid of and it’s not taboo

One more thing we had him wanting to remove his own statues as they’re a grim reminder of his death in a scene that is very similar to Tubbo on the 16th asking to remove the decorations of the day of his execution.

“I don’t think it’s a particularly good idea to... try and kill Dream. I don’t know how canon lives work for you anymore, but I only got one left” As I pointed out in the other post the 2 main reasons why Tubbo is reluctant about the plan are that he’s on his last life and that he managed to build a life for himself with Snowchester and Ranboo that he doesn’t wanna loose.

“Listen guys, I’ve experienced death now, it doesn’t matter how many lives I have left now, I’m NOT willing to go through that again” “Yeah that makes sense actually, that makes sense” This is an interesting question though of how many lives he re-acquired. We know Jack came back with 3 when he did it, but then again, normal rules don’t seem to apply to Jack Manifold. Also I wanted to include Ranboo’s quote there just because he’s literally been nothing but supportive and I love him for it.

Also all 3 teens decide at once that ignoring the Egg will most definitely make the problem go away, because that has always worked in the past of course! (Also, honestly, good for them. Let the adults take care of something for once!)

“I’m not very god at smal- that’s not true” “Mhmm” “So eh... you guys heard The News?” “The news about what?” “The news about...?” “You know... what-what’s been happening...” “What’s been happening?” “About- about umm... George” “About George? What happened with the Gogmeinster?” “Oh yeah, he got banned! Twice” “No no, he... he grew a third ear” “Really? Oh man!” “Oh yeah! I’ve seen a photo of that on instagram!” So, aside from this being so funny, the reason I’m highlighting it is because if there is one thing Tommy never struggled with in the past it was small talk. He could literally start blabbering with anyone about anything, no matter how dumb, with absolute confidence. Now he’s struggling with everything (both here and later in the Nether we have similar scenes for it). He is insecure about everything he says and socializing seems much harder for him. Regardless both Tubbo and Ranboo still go along with everything he says with absolute confidence, which seems to help him quite a bit. Considering that his biggest desire seems to be to be treated the same as he was before having them not pointing out his obvious insecurity (while still very obviously noticing it) is probably quite a big thing for him.

“Why are Punz’s eyes red?” “Why? Oh- Where is Punz?” “Oh, that might mean we have to kill him, he might kill us on sight” “Yeah, he might try to kill you. Where are you Tommy by any me- where are you?” “Yeah, stay away from him” “No I can fucking take him man!” “No because you get scared of damage...” “Tommy... yeah” “I don’t get scared of damage!” “That’s not true” “Tommy where are you?” I loved this scene so much! Tommy didn’t actually even see Punz here, he only saw his face on the players tab, but the other two were immediately on the defensive. Also this is what I mean when I say that it’s not that they don’t acknowledge Tommy’s situation, they’re just trying to give him some normalcy, because, as soon as he is in any actual or perceived danger they’re immediately in high alert.

“You’re like a living ghost” “I think that’s just called a human Tubbo” “You’re like a human” “That’s just called someone who is alive” “You’re treating me differently” So two things here:

1) Tubbo still has a lot of confusion towards the whole revival process an that’s what he was trying to express. Ranboo was not particularly happy with his choice of words though and kinda got the defensive tone again

2) Tommy shuts down very fast any time any kind of change is mentioned. In this case the change being Tubbo’s perception of him.

That said they manage to recover the situation really fast with Ranboo making a comparison between Tommy and Jesus (they’re teenagers, what can I say?)

“Tubbo I feel like we’ve grown less close while I’ve been in prison and dead” “That’s ‘cause you’ve been gone for such a long time...” “Do you like me less?” “Nope!” “Well it feels like you do” “Well, that’s all in your head then!” “No” “Maybe you superpower is immagination” “Maybe my superpower is anxiety” Well Tommy, do my job for me, will you? But yes, these kind of thoughts (fretting about what others, especially your friends or family think of you) is extremely common for individuals suffering from anxiety disorders. Also what Tubbo did here was really important, even if it is the bare minimum, he still provided the ressurance his friend needed and that’s good of him. Also, while Tommy’s dependence on Tubbo does shine through quite a bit during this stream Tubbo does continuosly set up healthy boundaries for them (introducing and keeping firm on his relationship with Ranboo and admitting that they did grow apart a bit and he is still confused about Tommy for example), which is extremely good. Ranboo is also presenting himself as a viable option for emotional support, which will actually be good for Tommy in the future as this would mean breaking out of the habit that was ingrained in him of relying on one single person every time.

“I’m not afraid of anything! The only thing I’m afraid of is, you know, waking up in the morning and...” “The- the thing your afraid of is waking up in the- are you alright? Are you- are you alright man? Are you good?” That’s concerning! But, again, very fitting with his newfound extreme anxiety he seems to be experiencing. Also ConcernedBoo, he just care about his friends and is worried. Pretty sure Tommy fits together with Michael and Tubbo in the circle of people he’s willing to protect.

Also, in case people were wondering, Ghostbur wasn’t handing out sugar because he was a fake Ghostbur, but just because Ranboo gave it to him and it was the only thing he had. Same goes for Tommy calling Ghostbur “Wilbur” and acting as if he was Alivebur and Ghostbur only correcting him after quite a while: it’s not because he’s fake, it’s because he gave permission to Tommy specifically to do so before. As I mentioned in the other post their relationship is complicated, but Ghostbur very much cares for Tommy a whole lot and he came back specifically because he heard Tommy needed help again, it’s not so weird he’d allow him to do stuff he doesn’t allow for others.

“Last time I spoke to you was like a few days ago...” Now, as some people pointed out this could simply be Ghostbur memory being sort of foggy and him not realizing how much time passed. But the OTHER theory is that he remembers talking to Phantommy (which we know happened thanks to Quackity’s lore, as they visited Glatt’s gym together). Honestly both are plausible (if the first one was true then meeting Phantommy may have simply made him upset and he could have forgotten about it, or perhaps he could have just forgotten that Tommy was dead).

“Ghostbur do you want him (Wilbur) to come back? Because I- I don’t. I don’t think that I do ever” “It’s... I... umm, hm. The-the world needs structure and order and he- he was good at that. He did that-” “No. The world needs less villains and he was a villain if I’ve ever seen one” “But a- a villain is just- is- sometimes the line’s a little blurry. You could say a little blurry, a tiny bit, it’s like a- a villain it’s just a hero you haven’t convinced yet” Now, as much as I love Ghostbur he’s half wrong here. Let me explain:

Simply put not all bad people can be redeemed for one thing (for example someone like Dream could never be redeemed because he hurt so many people in such horrible ways without ever regretting it), and secondly describing a villain as a “hero YOU HAVEN’T CONVINCED yet” puts the responsability of that persnon’s actions on their victims. As a matter of fact it’s most definitely NOT up to the ones who’ve been hurt to reabilitate the ones who hurt them (which is why Sam managing the prison now is considerable a conflict of interests). They shouldn’t even be forced to forgive that person if the person DOES change for the better. And here’s the crux of the issue: Wilbur hurt a LOT of people. He hurt Tubbo, he hurt Niki, he hurt Fundy, he hurt everyone who joined Pogtopia. And more then anything else he hurt Tommy. He was abusive and manipulative towards him and Tommy has every right to never forgive him. He has every right to be scared of him and regard him purely as a villain, because that’s what he was for him towards the end of his life.

Ghostbur bringing him back in the hopes that he’s changed at all just means that, once again, the responsability of his possible reabilitation will be left entirely on the shoulders of the teens of the server and the same goes for if there is NO reabilitation. The destruction will, once more, be left for them to deal with. Tommy specifically will have one more person who abused him to deal with. Wether Wilbur will or will not ally himself with Dream doesn’t matter, because he was still a destructive individual on his own (despite of course being that way because of his own mental spiral, but that just makes him more sympathetic, it doesn’t justify his actions nor make them any less hurtful for those around him).

Also Wilbur’s been dead for 10-12 years in Limbo time, I can’t imagine that doing wonders for his mental state...

There is a scene after that conversation where Tommy was talking about how being dead was, Tubbo asked a question about it and Tommy got upset. Of course the others got confused about his reactions since ha was already talking about, so, to clarify: the probable reason why anyone (aside from Ghostbur apparently) asking him questions about it upsets him is probably because of Dream. He mentioned multiple times now that Dream treating his death as a science experiment when he revived him was extremely traumatic for him. He hates the idea of being “just science” to the people around him. Ghostbur seem to be an exception to this, but that may be because Tommy seems predisposed to just trust Ghostbur more from an emotonal stand-point (perhaps because he reminds him of how Wilbur used to be before he spiraled).

“I love monster energy” “Monster energy is kind of scary...” “Mhm, it’s for monsters...” Man the very low-key constant self-deprecation sure it’s kinda worrying... I really do hope that someone will help him with his very obvious sef-esteem issues at some point.

“He (Wilbur) spent a lot of time around a bad guy. He spent around a decade, you said, around Schlatt and Schlatt- Schlatt’s the bed guy, Right?” “I don’t think Schlatt’s the only bad guy” “Him and Eret are the bad guys, right?” Once again Ghostbur’s view of things is very naive and still very much stuck in the past. It’s been so long now since Eret betrayal, and they tried to redeem themselves since. Meanwhile it’s also been months since Schlatt died, and, even back when he was alive, he was far from being the only arguably bad person, Wilbur being right there along with him if we consider what his actions caused. And now we have Dream and the Egg, we have Quackity indulging in torture, we have the syndacate having a gestapo arc, we have Jack back on his goal of killing a teen. We can be sympathetic toward many of this people, but this doesn’t change the fact that they hurt others a lot or that their objectives or actions are objectively morally wrong in some cases. By now it’s honestly pretty hard to draw the line of who IS and ISN’T a bad guy.

“Cobble is GOOD, people don’t like it when I use cobble though...” Again, the usual self confidence is completely lacking. This is worse then post exile: back then he still had the full confidence to build an ugly cbblestone tower on Techno’s front lawn, now even using a bit of cobblestone makes him self-concious.

Also apparently Sam instructed Sam Nook to keep Tommy specifically away from the prison for his own safety. Man’s still looking after him even if he probably won’t manage to do it directly for a while (at least until Tommy forgives him, if he does).

That’s pretty much it! It’s everything I’d consider important that I could find in the stream!

@mysweatymakerstudentworld

#tommyinnit #tubbo #wilbur soot #ranboo #ghostbur #tw abuse #tw manipulation #c!wilbur critical #I guess?#analysis #dream smp #/rp #my post #long post #though long ass post would fit better #I seriously just made a two parter on a block man roleplay huh?#god what is my life...

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ovidialee · 4 years ago

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After the War Author Interview: @solasnarealtai

The second of our Four Horseman @solasnarealtai lets us into her writer brain to school us on why Snarcissa makes uncanny sense--in canon, no less, and why she wouldn’t survive life in the Wizarding World. And I can confirm that she adorably talks EXACTLY like this in real life:

1) Which came first for you - original work or fanfiction?

Definitely original, but I can’t say that any of the early stuff was any good. I was just a kid that liked to make up stories, whether I was really writing them down or thinking them in my head...but my mom says that I’ve been writing for about as long as she can remember. I discovered fanfic when I was in high school - I think it was my freshman year. One of my really good friends shared most of my classes and we sat near each other in all of them. I noticed her writing a lot one day and asked what she was working on. She asked if I’d heard of a particular manga (I cannot recall the name of it) and even though I hadn’t, she proceeded to explain to me that she was writing fanfiction of it. She was using her own characters, however, and essentially just had me make one up and let me start writing with her. You can say I was hooked after that!

2) I never pictured Snarcissa or really thought about it. You definitely opened my eyes to why it works so well. I’d love for you to share the drive behind these two characters -- and specifically why in a bookstore?

Why wouldn’t I?! Joking aside... There's just something about them that makes sense to me. I started shipping them after Half-Blood Prince came out and I read the Spinner’s End scene. Everything about that chapter was pushing me to this belief that there had been something between these two in the past, even if there wasn’t currently. Narcissa clearly knew the way to Snape’s house, for one, and I think we can all agree that he is not a man who would give just anyone access to his home. She also grabs at his robes, is so close to him that her tears are literally falling on his chest...and he lets her.

Snape and Narcissa are both very intelligent people and I don’t think I’m alone in finding smart people attractive; we’re just drawn together, almost like magnets.

The Unbreakable Vow has some wedding vow vibes to it, and I’ve seen arguments all over the internet citing it as evidence either for or against this ship. It is true, I think, that Snape is willing to do what he must for his role of spy, but...some lesser men wouldn’t have agreed to make that vow. This ties a bit into my headcanon of him as Draco’s godfather as well. He is doing what he can to help people he cares about.

It is very unrealistic that he - especially as a grown man - would go the rest of his life pining over a supposed failed romantic relationship from his childhood and then just abstain from any relationship. I have many feelings about the Potters, which I’ll mostly abstain from right now, but the way that I write my Snape in regards to Lily is that he loved her as his friend, and that love may have come across a bit stronger than it would from other people, but he didn’t exactly have many role models in his life to know the nuances of those emotions at the time. So, my Snape regrets a lot of things, but he’s going to keep living….and part of that includes his life between the sheets.

I know the other Horsemen have taken inspiration from your wonderfully crafted Death Eater Chronicles, no matter which characters they’re writing -- and it’s brilliant! But if I write Snape, I write my Snape, and that man loves books. I’m a bookseller myself, which is part of why I’ve got all these scenes going through my head, but...we’ve seen what his house looks like. Books are everywhere along the walls. It’s literally a bibliophile’s dream to have that! I don’t know that all of them - or even many of them - fantasize specifically about having some hot sex surrounded by books but...I’m just saying (again) that I find smart people very attractive. And my Snape finds it very satisfactory.

3) And we find your Snape supremely satisfying. You are, after all, the queen of the Snape Bookstore Smut AU. If you had to write the AU of your life, what would it be? And what tropes would you use?

I honestly don’t even know how to answer this question. I will say though, if somebody adapted it to a film, I’d probably insist that it have a soundtrack similar to Beauty and the Beast (fun fact, that’s one of my favorites) and....I could see my love of writing being there still, but I could also picture it completely gone. For the sake of humoring myself, we’ll say I keep it. I go to a fancy school and get a great book deal, but then...oops….I’m having trouble writing and need to get some inspiration, so I go off on a little trip to seclude myself, but a couple days in, I have a meet-cute with an adorably quirky person -- probably a guy but I’m open to ladies too. I’d probably need help with something or we’re both reaching for the last copy of some book. And then I need the only one bed trope to come into play somewhere. That is one of my favorites, because I’m ridiculously simple sometimes… I’ll agree that it is so overdone, but it’s a trope for a reason! And I’m a sucker for it!

If we’re saying AU as in, I get to go into the Potter universe instead of anything like our own, I’m definitely going to Hogwarts and not Ilvermorny. I have spent most of my life picturing myself in Scotland, and going shopping in Diagon Alley. I’m not changing that because we finally get some answers on magic in America. Plus, accents.

Anyway. Hmm… As much as I want to be Slytherin, my Puff roots run deep, so I’d still stick with getting my taste of Slytherin elsewhere. *wink wink* I feel like such a basic person for saying this, but I’d have wanted to be there while Snape was a professor, because he’s got the sort of knowledge about his subject I admire in a teacher and I love learning from people who really know their shit. This obviously means I’d have to be around for the second Wizarding War, but I’ll be really honest and I doubt I’d have made it out alive. So...maybe no tropes for me there.

It has emotions, it has yearning, it has...books and Snape and smut. READ Even the Night Bleeds

Stay tuned for our third Horseman’s fic…

#author interview #solasnarealtai #even the night bleeds #After the War: Death Eaters Never Die #four horsemen #harry potter fanfiction #writers on tumblr #snape x narcissa #stop reading the tags and go to the fic already

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amazildoessomethingstupid · 4 years ago

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Chapter 68: December

Hey guys, welcome back. As you can tell by the title, we have a very special rant in store. As you guys may know, this rant series is meant to be about me catching up with BCB and where it’s been going recently, and give my thoughts about it. But today we are going to be doing something a little different, instead we are going to go back. And I mean WAY back. To one of if not the most notorious, the most infamous chapter in all of Bittersweet Candy Bowl. That’s right boys and girls…

WARNING: Very long Tumblr breaking rant below the break.

If you’re wondering why I’m doing this, it’s mostly because I wanted to do another Let’s Rant video but most of the boys don’t know about BCB. So when I made comparisons to December, they didn’t really understand what I was talking about. And I know that some of you new viewers may not understand why people hate December as much as we do. To really understand, you must put yourself in the shoes of a dedicated reader. Back to the year of 2011, a simpler time. A dark time. And we start off with one of my personal favorite pages in Bittersweet Candy Bowl.

SNOW. FUCKING SNOW!

FUCK. YEEEAAAAAAAH! LET’S HEAR IT FOR FUCKING SNNNNNNOOOOOWWWWWWWW!

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Alright that may seem like an over reaction, but let me set the stage for you alright, because at the time that this chapter came out I was a dedicated reader. And I mean full blown fan, waiting for the hour to change to read the pages as they came out. And at this time, Taeshi was going through a real rough time and it was quite apparent to everyone who was in the community. The plot seemed to stagnate, and there wasn’t much happening. Taeshi’s behavior had grown very strained and it was the common consensus that she needed to take a break.

So she did, and in order to take a break the upload schedule turned to two pages a week… The problem was that up to this point, Bittersweet Candy Bowl was uploading on an every other day upload schedule. Now the problem that comes when you slow down your schedule like that, is that it’s meant to be temporary, or that you compensate that with content in the pages and chapter that makes the wait more bearable or at least less tedious…

Now with all that in mind. Imagine if you will, that you had to wait 4 days for a new page to start a new chapter, and you were greeted by…

FUCKING SNOW! And a dread filled your heart as you realized you’d have to stare at snow for another full 2 days before you could look at something else, and hope that it’s more interesting than fucking. Snow.

The next page does not disappoint though, because now we actually have characters! And dialogue!

And look a joke, haha! Except

Look at all the characters in this page. You got Daisy, you got Paulo, you got abbey, you got David, you got sir Noodles, and you got a reinforcing action to remind us about how Abbey and Paulo’s relationship is.

Guess how how many or which of these characters actually matter in this chapter or have an effect on it. Can you guess?

Yup, yeah that’s right none of em. Not a single fucking one of these characters matter. Not a single fucking thing in this page fucking matters at all, it barely even constitutes as a set up for the rest of the chapter. Congratulations, we just wasted a week of your time. Actually I was wrong, you know what the one and only thing that this page does that means anything?

There! That one fucking line. You waited a whole fucking week to digest two pages and all it really tells you that you didn’t know is what FUCKING TIME IT IS! EXCEPT EVEN THAT IS TOLD TO YOU

BY THE TITLE OF THE FUCKING CHAPTER! I am losing my shit this early because I want to make it abundantly clear just how infuriating this chapter was to read. This was when I realized we were in for a LONG ride. To better understand this, the chapters that preceded this one were centered around Lucy’s slow decline into depression, after her friendship with Mike had become fractured leading to her isolating (or at least distancing herself) from Mike (and the rest of the gang by proxy). This chapter was billed to be the culmination of all that fallout, which makes this pacing SO GRATING.

Thankfully page 3 actually does have characters that matter, and it actually is a set up for what the chapter is going to be centered around which is the kids working on a World War 2 Essay.

And we finally get a bit of substance to sink our teeth into! But before we go any further I should tell you a bit about my. Man. Mike. So Mike is a moody bitch. I talked a bit about what happened to Lucy, but Mike despite literally NOTHING happening to him directly since then aside from the rest of the gang not understanding why he wanted to separate from Lucy is still being moody and bitchy. And here we see him reach PEAK MOODY MIKE!

Haha that’s an actually good joke. I appreciated that when it came out.

And so, because Mike is being a moody bitch he ends up sealing his fate and is paired with Lucy. And for a second here, I had hope. Since Taeshi is pretty much declaring how frustrating and stupid Mike’s moodiness has been for the past number of chapters. Also while we’re here, I’d like to point out how everyone in this page apparently got their arm lopped off. I mean look!

At least Lucy was able to find her right arm at the end there. But also, look at Abbey!

Oh look at him, you can see how he cares about Mike’s position on distancing from Lucy! Awww such a good friend. Oh he’s definitely not going to make a heel turn and accuse others of not caring about Mike!

I am so glad I saved that image.

Anyway the next page is Mike and Lucy deciding to go to the library to work on the essay.

And then the page after that is Lucy trying to make an effort to ease the awkwardness, while Mike gives her the cold shoulder. Congratulations. We have spent a week, walking to the fucking library.

The monotony is broken up though, as we get to see that Augustus is at this library.

It doesn’t stop the back and forth that we just got in the last two pages from continuing though, and as a reminder this is all that we’ve been given to sustain ourselves for three whole weeks!

At least Augustus is able to break up this feet-dragging by giving us SOMETHING different to talk about.

Ooh look, something actually interesting! We get some insight into Lucy and Augustus’ relationship. For context, Augustus has been a very interesting side-character; one of the best. And his relationship with Lucy is a pretty nice one with its own complexities and great chemistry. As I’ve mentioned before, Lucy had spent the last few chapters isolating herself from Mike to try to let things cool off and respect his wishes. In that time, she ended up finding company in Augustus, the resident bad boy. He was suspected of attempted rape on Daisy, but we’re not talking about that.

Well maybe a little.

Lucy expresses what she’s dealing with and like before, she’s trying to find understanding from Augustus.

And he is having NONE OF IT! As someone who actually has serious problems, he calls Lucy out for being a privileged blue-eyed white cat whose only problem in life is being rejected by someone she loves.

But Augustus does give Lucy some advice, in how he sees and deals with his situation. Showing that while he does think Lucy is stupid for even thinking about killing herself over Mike, he does want to help her. It’s just…

He’s wrong. He’s so fucking wrong.

We now know through the power of hindsight, that Abbey and Daisy’s relationship was a total sham! It wasn’t a healthy loving relationship at all! It was all a lie!

GOTTA LOVE THEM RETCONS AMIRITE?!

Nah we haven’t even STARTED to begin.

Anyway, Augustus leaves and we’re back to this bullshit. Now Mike’s not just being moody, he’s being judgy!

Oh no, fuck you Lucy! I don’t want anything to do with you, I want you to be out of my life!

Hey, what are you doing, talking and having a conversation with someone I don’t care about? Stop being such a leech! Just because I don’t want you to be in my life, doesn’t mean you can just go and move on to find company in other people! Why don’t you just die alone and unloved like I tell you to?!

But don’t worry right after, Lucy breaks the ice and gets a smile out of the boy!

It’s a breath of fresh air, and we see the dynamic with the two is still there and-

No, I didn’t buy that when this page came out either. It’s meant to portray that Lucy can make Mike feel better and break him out of his funk, but…yeah at this point I knew better. By the way, it has now been one whole month of December.

And we’re only a third of the way through.

And thankfully we’re out of the library. And even more fortunately…

Taeshi learned that you don’t have to spend two whole updates on moving your characters from one location to the other! She’s learned you can smash two pages together and NOT WASTE YOUR AUDIENCE’S FUCKING TIME!

As for the actual content of this page, Lucy and Mike go to Mike’s house and we get a bit of Lucy interacting with Mike’s family, and how they get along well. Mike’s still moody as ever though, and we get our first glimpse that things aren’t perfect for him. Also

RIP the boy, Chris. he ain’t dead but I do miss him.

Anyway, the two go to Mike’s room to study, and it’s still awkward until Lucy breaks the silence!

Old joke is old, but I love it nonetheless.

Okay, enough foolin’ around. Actually Lucy decides that she’s tired of pussyfooting around, and decides to say, “fuck it” and let off some steam by playing some video games like old times!

Mike is of course denying it and content in stewing in his anger. But lucy is adamant about doing something to break this stupid cycle of drama. I like it. Even though I didn’t buy the bit of Lucy making Mike laugh by showing a funny face, this one I do like. And while some (especially at the time) would point to this as an example of Lucy emotionally manipulating Mike to get what she wants in making him not angry at her, I would say-

SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LET ME HAVE THIS ONE, JUST THIS ONCE! I HAVE BEEN SO GOD DAMN CONTENT STARVED, THIS FUCKING DRAMA HAS BEEN GOING AROUND IN CIRCLES FOR ALMOST TWO YEARS! MIKE AND LUCY HAVEN’T TALKED OR ADVANCED THEIR POSITIONS IN MONTHS! LET ME EMBRACE THIS ONE LIGHT IN DARKNESS BEFORE IT IS SNUFFED OUT! LET. ME. HAVE. HOPE.

THANK YOU!

And so after a bit of a timelapse we get to see Mike and Lucy playing together, and how the turns tabled!

It’s great, and we even get a glimpse at how Lucy has been progressing herself. Perhaps the improvement in gaming being a metaphor of her own self-improvement.

We even get a bit of Mike reflecting and thinking how it is nice. And remembering that Lucy isn’t really that bad.

The scene continues, and we get a peek into Mike’s circumstance. As Mike kind of reveals that he himself has felt quite alone without Lucy there. And it’s really touching, it’s good character development.

And Lucy continues to take initiative to stop the awkwardness, by giving Mike a distraction. Not looking to fill the hole in his heart, not looking to force him to accept her. But allowing him to enjoy himself in the moment. It’s nice. It’s…

Really…nice…

Y’know…

It really was nice.

Ladies and gentlemen.

This is December.

[redacted due to Tumblr purposes. insert the entire Mike yelling scene from January here]

One month. That’s how long this scene lasted in real-time. Everyone who was a fan in 2011, everyone who had been so deeply invested in these characters watching them grow, interact, struggle, and suffer for years. All of them could only watch for one entire month as Taeshi ripped their hearts out. People defended this scene when it came out. There’s still people who defend this scene to this day, saying that Mike was right. I wasn’t one of those people. When this scene came out, I was shocked. I couldn’t understand what was going on, but I knew it was wrong. It was the first time I ever got into a discussion about BCB, because I just had to understand what the fuck was happening and why. Why is this happening? Why would Mike do this? How is this possible? And the only response I got, was that I just couldn’t understand. And y’know…

They were right. I didn’t understand. I was never really abused as a child. I never had bad friends, or was really bullied (except one time). There was no way I could grasp what the fuck just happened. Which felt so bizarre, because when this chapter came out…I was 15. I was the same age as these characters and I couldn’t fathom doing what Mike just did. I couldn’t imagine any of my friends saying what Mike just said. And yet everyone else seemed to understand, to the point I thought that I was the weird one. Did I just fucking win the social lottery or something and just not have any shitty friends?

Maybe so…But y’know after all these years, stewing and thinking about December which has haunted me as I’m sure it has, many other readers. And after all this time, running it around my head, and arguing about it, I think I finally understand. I get it…I finally get what Mike’s saying here.

That being said, no this scene is still bullshit.

Now let me tell you why.

First of all, look at this face.

Just look at this dopey doe-eyed cute cat right here, BECAUSE YOU WILL NEVER SEE THAT AGAIN.

But just to recap, let’s start with the actual preamble to the bullshit. Mike gets a text from Sandy which makes him revert back to his moody Mike self. And I will say at least here, Mike is in character. He’s been a bitch this whole chapter, and he’s just snapping back to it because he is reminded “Oh yeah, Sandy exists!” so he tells Lucy to beat it.

Lucy is understandably frustrated because we were seeming to finally get to a better place between these two characters. And instead of Mike being upfront about what his problem is, he chooses to shutdown the conversation and act like there’s nothing. Or to put it in another way…

So what exactly is causing Mike to revert to his moody mode?

Right, right, of course. It’s because Sandy’s coming! And just to catch up those of us blessed enough to not remember…

This is Sandy. Mike’s long time long-distance girlfriend and central conflict for BCB for the last…well for pretty much most of BCB at this point. Mike loves her, bordering on the point of obsession. To where most of his actions in BCB can be linked directly to Sandy. We’ll get to that later, but this is all you really need to know right now. Just briefly keep it in mind,

Lucy is surprisingly taking it in stride, or at least trying to be supportive of Mike and Sandy’s relationship. Obviously it does hurt her, but she is trying to make the best of it. Taking what Augustus had said to heart, in accepting Mike and Sandy’s relationship but still trying to be there for Mike. Using that to grow and maybe be a stronger person.

But sadly…this is December.

And nothing is allowed to grow in December.

Well…yes. Partly because we were literally told NINE PAGES AGO!

I believe this is what the kids call…gaslighting. But I prefer to call it

BULLSHIT!

But now we’re getting into it…

Let’s dig into the real hard bullshit of December.

You ready?

I’m ready.

Yes, right. Lucy is a bitch who has absolutely nothing for Mike, and never acted like a friend, or god forbid did something selfless for Mike like oh I don’t know…

Risking her life to try to save you from drowning, when she herself couldn’t swim and knew it could very well lead to her death.

Or what about when she was almost raped, and put literally put herself between you and danger!

TWICE! Wait, what the hell? They changed Confrontation! She’s supposed to say…

Because before mike got pinned he was saying…

That was like an actually cool and bad ass line. One of the best moments in BCB, why would you change it? Why would you change it to something as soft as that? And I’m the guy who wrote a comic where the moral of the story is that you can solve everything through the power of friendship!

But I digress. Was Lucy mean to Mike? Yeah. Did she pick on him a lot in the early chapters? Sure! But here’s the thing that people seem to forget about those early volumes…

Mike was kind of a little shit back then!

Lucy often picked on Mike because he was doing something wrong like trying to treat her like Sandy.

And lest you forget, Mike was more than capable of doing the exact same things!

Yes Lucy picked on Mike, but Mike also gave shit to Lucy. They both were active participants in giving shit to one another, but no it’s not bullying. It’s giving someone shit for doing something stupid, to keep them grounded, it’s a form of support that helps to build someone up not just through violent means, but because you care enough to want them to stop being stupid. And as the saying goes, “A good friend will hold you and support you to tell you everything will be okay no matter what. Your best friend, will kick you in the side and tell you to stop being a pussy and get over it.”

BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT FRIENDS FUCKING DO! THEY DON’T LIFT YOU UP! THEY MAKE YOU PICK YOURSELF UP! AND Y’KNOW WHY MIKE IS THINKING THIS WAY? YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT THE FUCKING CHERRY ON TOP OF THIS BULLSHIT CAKE IS?!

Sandy…

Mother…Fucking…Sandy. Up to this point Sandy herself had little to no presence as a person in this story. I mean she had an effect on a lot of things, but as an actual character we never got to see much of her personality outside of one standalone chapter: To the Top which only served to give us a shallow and basic understanding of her character. But even then, as far as actual personality, writing, hobbies, and chemistry we really didn’t get much at all as far as understanding who she is. The only things we knew for certain was that she’s in a long-term long-distance relationship with Mike. She’s a model. She goes to school. And she’s beautiful. That’s it. But that in and of itself doesn’t make Sandy a bad character. I mean for cryin’ out loud, two my favorite characters that I shoe-horn into all my projects are McCain and Carter. And they’re the most one-note characters in this comic! No, the problem with Sandy isn’t that we don’t know anything about her. It’s that despite us knowing nothing about her, Sandy has her fingerprints on almost every fucking conflict in Bittersweet Candy Bowl. And worse, the only purpose she seems to have on the comic is INFLUENCING MIKE! Let me pull some examples…

Mike and Lucy go on an adventure into the city which fleshes out the inner problems in their relationship.

Because Sandy might be there.

Mike and Lucy are starting to act awkward with each other, and it’s making everyone take notice. Why?

Because Mike is delusional about Sandy.

In the chapter directly after that, Mike is now suddenly obnoxiously happy and giddy, why?

Because he finally got to talk with Sandy!

It’s Christmas time, and Tess is having a party and Mike’s coming, why?

BECAUSE OF FUCKING SANDY!

Mike rebuffs Daisy’s advances during the carnival date…why?

Because of Sandy!

Although, to be fair of course there WAS a lot of other things going on in that scene, primarily Daisy being REALLY pushy, and needy. So it’s not JUST because of Sandy. It was because we just weren’t ready for Slut Daisy. The Free Daisy.

Tess is organizing a group vacation trip to Acapulco!

And what’s this? Mike doesn’t want to go? Is it because he thinks Lucy is gonna go and he wants to separate himself from her? Is it because he’s finally woken up and decided to stand up for himself?!

NO YOU FUCKING IDIOT! IT’S BECAUSE OF MOTHER FUCKING SANDY! AND THE WORST PART OF IT ALL, IS THAT NONE OF THESE SCENES ARE EVER DIRECTLY BECAUSE OF SANDY’S ACTIONS AS A PERSON! IT’S LITERALLY JUST BECAUSE SHE EXISTS! YOU COULD MAKE UP ANYTHING ABOUT SANDY, AND SHE WOULD STILL HAVE THE SAME FUCKING IMPACT ON THE STORY THAT SHE HAS HAD UP TO THIS POINT! All that Sandy’s character has been used for is just a means of influencing Mike!

And that’s not a character…that’s a plot device.

And nothing makes that point more clear…than this scene.

We get a scene where Mike is talking with Sandy, and he shows how over and over, Lucy’s jabs and abuses which were played for laughs in Volume 1 apparently were a super serious problem and we should’ve seen them as such. Now as a reader, I didn’t buy that for a fucking second, for reasons I’ve already explained. However, Sandy being on the other side of that long-distance relationship doesn’t fully understand the situation. But still she’s very worried and concerned for Mike, which leads to this.

Sandy making Mike hate Lucy. Some have pointed out that this is actually a good scene. Because here we get to see that Sandy at least cares about Mike. Except that, if you strip away those tears, and all the bullshit. What little characterization we get here, which is shit we already know in Sandy caring about Mike and Lucy’s relationship. Is something we should already know. She’s in a long-term long-distance relationship with Mike SHE FUCKING BETTER CARE ABOUT LUCY! The problem though, is like I said… Sandy isn’t treated like a fucking character. She’s treated like a fucking plot device! If she were an actual character, we should’ve seen her actually have a back and forth with Mike. The whole conversation about Lucy should’ve come up a LONG time ago. Because if she were treated like an actual character with agency…

She would’ve already known this.

You telling me that after how many phone calls, in the time that elapsed between these phone scenes Mike never actually told her about Lucy; the other biggest part of his life?! Did Mike never tell her about the amount of times that Lucy almost died to save his life? Or the amount of times he did the same for her? No! Because that would bring character growth. And we don’t want character growth.

We want to push this narrative! We want to implant these thoughts into Mike. We want him to have a victim complex so that he can do shit like THIS!

We want to push this plot point. And Sandy is the vessel to drive it off the cliff. This is why I fucking hate December. Because worst of all THIS…

Is no longer Mike speaking. This is Sandy’s influence speaking. Now LITERALLY ALL THE FUCKING SHIT THAT MIKE PEDALLED ABOUT NOT WANTING TO BE LUCY’S BABY SITTER AND BULLSHIT, CAN NOW BE ATTRIBUTED TO SANDY INFLUENCING HOW MIKE SEES HIS OWN FRIENDSHIP! And since we don’t have a clear timeframe of where these calls were made, and when exactly Sandy got through to Mike, that means you could pick any time where Mike was being cold or distancing from Lucy and blame it on Sandy! Including…

This scene…

Lest you think characters were the only casualty of December’s nuclear blast, it took with it one of the most emotionally tense and moving chapters of Bittersweet Candy Bowl: A Distance Apart.

I’ve already talked about this chapter in my rant on Golden Hour (aka December 2: homosexual boogaloo) so I’m not gonna get too into how the perspective of this chapter was changed because of December, but I will say that lines like the above now are specifically what’s tainted because of December. No longer is this Mike realizing that Lucy isn’t who he thinks she is, or him realizing that their relationship is not a healthy one on his own. It’s because as he said himself!

It’s Sandy’s fault. Because all she heard about Lucy was the negative, and now all Mike can see is the negative. And this chapter is saying it’s all Sandy’s fault that Mike now has a victim complex and it’s totally fair for him to say what he’s about to say.

WAIT! DID YOU JUST SAY…

JANUARY?!

Hah, nah I’m just fuckin’ with ya. We’re trying to stay focused here, so I’m holding off on the January references. Don’t worry kids, you’re safe for now.

For now…

Let’s unpack this first, because believe it or not we still have a LOT of ground to cover. Specifically, let’s talk about Mike’s glorious plan to leave the table!

God it is taking a lot to not just paste panels from Daisy’s rant in January. You people have no idea… But to summarize, this is fucking stupid at best and manipulative at worst. What Mike is talking about, is selfishly pide-pipering their whole friend group (minus Tess because Tess doesn’t exist anymore) away from Lucy, and he’s betting all of that on the fact that he knows Daisy is still head over heels for him. And what’s absolutely stupid about this fucking idea (which by the way seems to be premeditated so this can’t even be blamed on Sandy) is that if this was Mike’s plan all along. And December didn’t happen, and he did this table move guess what? Sure. Daisy follows Mike, Abbey and Paulo follow Daisy, and David follows Paulo…and then they invite Lucy, because in case you forgot SHE’S THEIR FRIEND TOO! (also I just noticed Mike completely forgot about Susan. That’s kinda fucked up, dude.)

But not as fucked up as this! Seriously, that’s a fucking low blow. And so fucking judgy. I guess we now know where Abbey learned to stoop so low while grand standing on his high horse! And yes I have heard the “muh hormones” and “they’re just KiDs!” excuses. But none of that really explains…

WHY THE FUCK DOES MIKE CARE?! DO YOU SERIOUSLY CARE IF LUCY (as you would put it) LEACHES OFF OF PAULO? HE’S LIKE ONE OF THE TOP OFFENDERS FOR PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY ABUSED YOU! THE MOTHERFUCKER SICCED A GAGGLE OF GIRLS TO BEAT UP ON YOU FOR BEING A “CHEATER”! Or are you worried because if Lucy clings to Paulo, then it ruins your fool-proof plan of going to another table since she’ll follow Paulo? OH NO, WE’VE FOUND A HOLE IN YOUR INGENIOUS PLAN! But speaking of worst offenders…

THIS. LINE. THIS FUCKING LINE! I don’t care who you are, I don’t care what the fuck you think. YOU DO NOT COME BACK FROM SAYING THIS. YOU CAN NOT FUCKING SAY THIS SHIT, AND THEN BE THE GOOD GUY! This is the point where I and many others realized Mike, was too far gone. And yet SOME PEOPLE WILL STILL ARGUE ABOUT THIS SHIT!

Oh you don’t understand, Amazil! He is just a stupid 16 year old ball of emotions and hormones! This has been building up THIS ENTIRE TIME! You even pointed out how Mike’s frustrations have been hinted at since the Vacation Arc! Obviously this has been hinted at for years! You’re just too ignorant to understand what Mike’s doing here! Of course he’s being overly cruel here, he feels backed into a corner, and is facing off against his abuser!

Now listen here, you may be right. I can’t, I hope, and I am grateful that; I don’t fully understand how it feels to be abused for all my life. But what I do know, is that NO ONE. Child, Teenager, or adult. Would fucking stoop that fucking low, and think they have any business. Any chance. Of coming back from that terribly burnt bridge. No one is that fucking ignorant! WHEN YOU BURN A BRIDGE LIKE THAT, WHEN YOU GO THAT FAR, YOU BETTER FUCKING BE READY TO LIVE WITH THE CONSEQUENCES! AND MIKE AT THIS POINT, SHOULD KNOW VERY WELL WHAT THE CONSEQUENCES MAY INCLUDE! AS THE PERSON WHO KNOWS LUCY MORE THAN ANYONE ELSE ABOUT LUCY, HE SHOULD BE FULLY FUCKING AWARE WHAT SHE IS GOING TO FUCKING DO WHEN TOLD THAT SHE IS A PARASITE AND THAT NO ONE FUCKING LOVES HER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU EXPECT SHE WAS GOING TO FUCKING DO, MIKE?!

JESUS CHRIST, HE’S LITERALLY USING HER DEEPEST SECRETS AND HIDDEN INSECURITIES THAT ONLY HE KNOWS ABOUT AGAINST HER! HOW THE FUCK DO YOU SUPPORT THIS SHIT? AND FURTHERMORE, “Like I’m the only one who cares about you.” TO QUOTE YOU LITERALLY A PAGE AGO!

YOU FUCKING TOLD HER THAT NOBODY LOVES HER. AND THAT SHE’S A FUCKING PARASITE! HOW ARE YOU THIS FUCKING STUPID! HOW CAN YOU STILL THINK THAT YOU’RE IN THE RIGHT? HOW DO OTHER PEOPLE THINK YOU’RE IN THE RIGHT? HOW CAN YOU STOOP SO FUCKING LOW, WHILE GRAND STANDING ON YOUR HIGH HORSE?!

Now, imagine if you will, after 2 whole months of reading December. You sit there and you wonder what is going to happen now. What is left to say? What more is Mike going to do? I mean there’s no way this chapter can get any worse! There’s NO WAY that Mike can be any more of an asshole. It’s not possible! And as if to get one last knife twist out of you. To kill the last shred of hope you had, that maybe. Just maybe this could be salvaged, and Mike can’t be worse… Taeshi does this.

….

Y’know, I once heard a story that someone actually killed themselves over BCB.

And I completely believe that. Two whole months we spent, having to watch week after week as this character we cared about. Rips apart the other character we’ve spent so much time learning about, growing with, understanding, and learning to love. And how do you end this chapter?

Grindingly slow. With Lucy throwing up, then eyeing Mike’s phone.

Followed by a nothing page where Mike’s happy.

Another nothing page where Mike goes to his room.

Dialogue that means nothing.

A whole fucking page of Lucy leaving.

MORE FUCKING SNOW

And one last lie.

And that, kids. Is the chapter of December. The most infamous chapter in all of Bittersweet Candy Bowl. And I hope you’re starting to understand why that is the case. Although, I’m sure a lot of you may have some contentions especially given the newer chapters that have come out. I mean, I often compare bad or infuriating scenes to December. And many may wonder or feel like those chapters are worse than December. I mean sure Mike ripping into Lucy is bad…

But what about the one-sided and almost carbon copy of December in Golden Hour?

Or what about Guest of Honor with it’s Abbey Smash?

And what about the second coming of the Carnival Chapter, with its DISGUSTING implications?

Or lest we all forget the wonderous return of Lucy herself, in Love Again! All of these chapters are fucking terrible in their own right. And it’s debatable how they ruin some characters worse than December. But there’s one very important factor that is lost to us now, that makes December in my eyes worse than any other chapter that Taeshi has put out. One singular thing makes December worse than anything Taeshi has come out with so far… And what is that factor?

Why, it’s TIME my dear reader. Time is what sets December apart from every other chapter. Readers at the time had to spend three whole months waiting for this chapter to end. We stared at each singular page for days, waiting hours on end, hoping that the next page would somehow be better, or give us an out. Instead it got worse and worse and worse. But what also sets it apart from all those other chapters I’ve mentioned is that, unlike Guest of Honor, Golden Hour, or Return to Carnival chapter; December was a very important moment in Bittersweet Candy Bowl. Not only because of how it changed the character, but because it is one of the only times in this fucking comic where the plot actually starts to develop. And we finally get a clear conflict to grasp onto and focus on.

In the chapters that came before December, the conflict of Mike and Lucy was just slowly getting worse and worse. And for the most part it just seemed to stagnate, with Lucy trying to keep her distance from Mike, and Mike constantly giving Lucy the cold shoulder. And everyone else having to deal with that. December was meant to be (and it did succeed in becoming) a bombshell chapter. A big revelation moment where things finally kick into high gear. Like, “Oh man that was brutal!” “What’s gonna happen now? Sandy is coming!” “Lucy just got fucking REKT!” “What is she gonna do?” “Taeshi just dropped the biggest bomb on top of us, where is she gonna take us? How are we going to follow up this momentum?!”

BY RELEASING ONE OF THE LONGEST. MOST NEEDLESS CHAPTERS EVER!

FOURTY EIGHT FUCKING PAGES. ALMOST FOUR MONTHS DEDICATED TO A PLOT POINT THAT HAS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH THE GIANT NUCLEAR BOMBSHELL THAT WAS JUST DROPPED ON US! And it’s especially needless because the entire point of this chapter is to tell us that Abbey’s mom died. Except that WE ALREADY THOUGHT SHE WAS DEAD! Oh you mean this character who all we know about was that she in a terribly abusive marriage, who we have not heard from since Abbey was introduced into the comic, who was in such a terrible state that she left her son and daughter orphaned. You mean the person so fucked up, that the last time we saw them was on a fucking stretcher is…DEAD?! SAY IT AIN’T SO! Y’know, it would’ve actually been more of a twist, and a lot more interesting if we found out ABBEY’S MOM WAS ACTUALLY ALIVE!

INSTEAD OF BUILDING OFF THE FUCKING MOMENTUM THAT YOU JUST SET UP, WE GET STRUNG ALONG FOR FOURTY EIGHT FUCKING PAGES! INSTEAD OF FOCUSING ON LUCY, AND USING DECEMBER AS A LAUNCHING POINT TO DRIVE THE FUCKING PLOT, ALL OF THE MOMENTUM IS GROUND TO A FUCKING HALT IN SERVICE OF A PLOT POINT THAT ULTIMATELY DOESN’T FUCKING MATTER! And if you made it through that and was hoping, “okay NOW we can start to get into the actual plot! NOW we can focus on Lucy, and what the aftermath of December is! Well…

youtube

Paulo tries to give a cake to Lucy, and he mostly fails, giving us

NOTHING!

Just beautiful! The one chapter where it would be okay to not give all the attention to Mike and Lucy’s relationship. The one chapter where we could maybe get to see Sandy be a character! Mike X Lucy is fucked, but maybe we can find comfort in Mike X Sandy! Maybe we can have some sweet moments, and strengthen this central love triangle that we’ve been dancing around for all these years! Maybe, just maybe, Sandy can be more than just a fucking plot device!

BUT NOPE! SHE’S JUST THERE TO BE USED SO THAT MIKE CAN REALIZE THAT HE WAS WRONG AND FEEL BAD, SO HE CAN TRY TO MAKE IT UP TO LUCY! TOO BAD IT’S TOO LATE, SO IF YOU WERE LOOKING TO HAVE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT EITHER FROM LUCY OR SANDY, I’M SORRY BUT YOU GET

TWO BIG HEAPING SERVINGS OF NOTHING!

AND IF YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE STARVING FOR CONTENT BEFORE, BRACE YOURSELF FOR A ONE-PAGE CHAPTER THAT GIVES YOU

NOTHING!

AND I HOPE YOU FUCKING LIKE THAT ONE-PAGE BECAUSE YOU’RE GONNA HAVE TO LOOK AT IT FOR

FOUR

WHOLE

MONTHS!

Although… to be fair, I think during that hiatus period Taeshi had guest comics and exclusive content to keep us occupied, but you get the point. As for the rest of the chapters…

Paulo breaks up with Jasmine in the most hackneyed fucking way possible, and we get a fake-out of Lucy’s suicide attempt.

We finally get the play chapter, and it teases us with the idea that Lucy and Mike are getting better except that no one falls for it because IT’S IN THE PLAY. AND WE ALL KNOW THAT IT’S JUST AN ACT AND IT’S FUCKING…

youtube

And then Lucy finally attempts suicide and it’s all OFF-SCREEN! THEY KILLED OFF THE MAIN CHARACTER! THE ONE FUCKING BIT THAT WE WERE ALL LOOKING FORWARD TO, AND IT’S OFF-SCREEN!

Do you see what I mean now? December isn’t just a fucking chapter. It’s an arc. The most teeth grindingly slow, and agonizing arc Taeshi ever made! This is why December is and always will be the absolute fucking worst! It’s like Taeshi knew what we wanted and refused to deliver! Instead being content with teasing the readers over and over for almost two years, with the prospect of seeing Lucy go through a depression arc. Instead, we’re focused on literally everyone else and all of Lucy’s inner turmoil, heartbreak, thoughts, and progressions are just hinted at and we’re just left in the dark. We never got to see Lucy in her final moments. What was she doing? What was she thinking? Where was she? How is she doing? We wouldn’t get that information for

Nearly four years! And even then, IT WAS ALSO BULLSHIT! December is like a nuclear warhead of a bombshell that was dropped on us, except instead of going off and blowing us away, sending us to the greater plains. It just leaked radiation everywhere and killed us from the inside slowly. Its carbon footprint can be felt to this very day, we can’t get over December. Because THE COMIC ITSELF CAN NOT GET OVER DECEMBER! People who wanted to see Lucy become a better person, to see her try to get better, get help, or do SOMETHING! Would never get that relief. When I thought about December and how it treated its characters. I felt sorry for all the people who had to read this, who felt for Lucy. Who wanted to see her get better… I felt bad because I knew deep down that we were never going to get that story…

So I did it myself…

Don’t act surprised. You knew I was gonna go there. I literally warned you! There is no way in hell I’m gonna talk about December without bringing up the comic I literally made BECAUSE of December in: January. And this time we’re looking at January as a whole. Because now that you know WHY and WHAT I hate about December, you can start to see why January was made the way it was. I feel the need to explain this, because January still gets a bad rap by people saying that it’s “hate-filled” which it’s not. January is not a death threat , nor is it meant to say “I’m better than you”, it’s not a love note to BCB, it’s a Get Well Soon card. Not necessarily saying that I can do it better, but rather this is what you could’ve done. Whether or not it’s better is up to you to decide. And with that context, you can see why January was written the way it was. And it all starts with one simple change.

Instead of just outright removing December, the only thing I changed was that Mike didn’t get paired with Lucy and throw a fit. It doesn’t spitefully act like December never happened, in fact…

December plays out the exact same way as it did in the canon, just with Susan supplementing for Lucy. So Sandy’s still coming home, Mike’s still pissed at Lucy, and he’s planning on moving to a new table to get away from her. But because Lucy’s not there…

She’s able to fucking do something.

We get to see her try.

We get to see her fail.

We see how Mike’s plan comes to fruition.

We see how things fall apart, even with Lucy’s best efforts.

We see how December still takes its toll.

We get to see her snap out of it, briefly.

We see her at her lowest point.

We see what she’s thinking and why she’s doing what she’s doing.

We see her try to figure out what to do.

We see her picking up the pieces.

We see her take action to improve herself.

We see her getting help.

We see her taking action.

We see her getting better.

We see everyone come together to support her.

We see her at the end of her journey, come to terms with what she’s done. And wanting to improve not only herself, but her friendship with Mike. She shows maturity, empathy, and most importantly GROWTH as a character.

And in the end, the reader never gets to see how Mike and Lucy end up talking things out, but they can rest easy knowing that everything is going to be okay. And if THAT’S hate-filled, I don’t know what the fuck you’d call the canon’s handling of Lucy in the December arc.

The fact that we never got to see Lucy try.

The fact that the comic kept dicking us around, and baiting us with the inevitable.

The fact it KEPT FUCKING BAITING US WITH FALSE HOPE.

The fact we don’t get to even see her at the end of the line. The fact we had to wait three years for her to come back and let us know that she’s even ALIVE!

The fact that when she does comes back, SHE’S A HORRIBLE CUNTY SHELL OF THE PERSON SHE ONCE WAS…

That… is why December is the most infamous chapter in all of Bittersweet Candy Bowl. Not just because of what it did. But because of what it didn’t do. Because it promised the end to Mike and Lucy’s drama one way or another. It promised us that we were going to tackle these issues that Mike brought up in Lucy, but yet… Here we are.

Back to square fucking one. You know what they say…Those who don’t know their history are doomed to repeat it. So you better brush up on your December knowledge, or at least I hope this rant serves as a good refresher. Cause from the looks of it, we’ve been repeating these plot points for almost 10 years…

Y’know I thought I was actually going crazy there for a second. Obsessing and never getting over December for all these years. But now I see. This comic…never moved on from it. We’ve never recovered. We’ve been stuck in December for almost 10 years…

0/10 never forget…

#Bittersweet Candy Bowl #rant #holy shit this pushed the limits of Tumblr

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richincolor · 4 years ago

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We've got six books on our radar this week! Did we miss anything? What's on your TBR list?

The Other Side of Perfect by Mariko Turk Little Brown/Poppy

Alina Keeler was destined to dance, but one terrifying fall shatters her leg--and her dreams of a professional ballet career along with it.

After a summer healing (translation: eating vast amounts of Cool Ranch Doritos and binging ballet videos on YouTube), she is forced to trade her pre-professional dance classes for normal high school, where she reluctantly joins the school musical. However, rehearsals offer more than she expected--namely Jude, her annoyingly attractive cast mate she just might be falling for.

But to move forward, Alina must make peace with her past and face the racism she had grown to accept in the dance industry. She wonders what it means to yearn for ballet--something so beautiful, yet so broken. And as broken as she feels, can she ever open her heart to someone else?

Where the Rhythm Takes You by Sarah Dass Balzer + Bray

Seventeen-year-old Reyna has spent most of her life at her family’s gorgeous seaside resort in Tobago, the Plumeria. But what once seemed like paradise is starting to feel more like purgatory. It’s been two years since Reyna’s mother passed away, two years since Aiden – her childhood best friend, first kiss, first love, first everything – left the island to pursue his music dreams. Reyna’s friends are all planning their futures and heading abroad. Even Daddy seems to want to move on, leaving her to try to keep the Plumeria running.

And that's when Aiden comes roaring back into her life – as a VIP guest at the resort.

Aiden is now one-third of DJ Bacchanal – the latest, hottest music group on the scene. While Reyna has stayed exactly where he left her, Aiden has returned to Tobago with his Grammy-nominated band and two gorgeous LA socialites. And he may (or may not be) dating one of them…

Inspired by Jane Austen's Persuasion, Where the Rhythm Takes You is a romantic, mesmerizing novel of first love and second chances.

From Little Tokyo, with Love by Sarah Kuhn Viking Books for Young Readers

If Rika’s life seems like the beginning of a familiar fairy tale–being an orphan with two bossy cousins and working away in her aunts’ business–she would be the first to reject that foolish notion. After all, she loves her family (even if her cousins were named after Disney characters), and with her biracial background, amazing judo skills and red-hot temper, she doesn’t quite fit the princess mold.

All that changes the instant she locks eyes with Grace Kimura, America’s reigning rom-com sweetheart, during the Nikkei Week Festival. From there, Rika embarks on a madcap adventure of hope and happiness–searching for clues about her long-lost mother, exploring Little Tokyo’s hidden treasures with a cute actor, and maybe…finally finding a sense of belonging.

But fairy tales are fiction and the real world isn’t so kind. Rika knows she’s setting herself up for disappointment, because happy endings don’t happen to girls like her. Should she walk away before she gets in even deeper, or let herself be swept away?

Illusionary (Hollow Crown #2) by Zoraida Cordova Little, Brown Books for Young Readers

Reeling from betrayal at the hands of the Whispers, Renata Convida is a girl on the run. With few options and fewer allies, she's reluctantly joined forces with none other than Prince Castian, her most infuriating and intriguing enemy. They're united by lofty goals: find the fabled Knife of Memory, kill the ruthless King Fernando, and bring peace to the nation. Together, Ren and Castian have a chance to save everything, if only they can set aside their complex and intense feelings for each other.

With the king's forces on their heels at every turn, their quest across Puerto Leones and beyond leaves little room for mistakes. But the greatest danger is within Ren. The Gray, her fortress of stolen memories, has begun to crumble, threatening her grip on reality. She'll have to control her magics--and her mind--to unlock her power and protect the Moria people once and for all.

For years, she was wielded as weapon. Now it's her time to fight back.

Angel & Hannah: A Novel in Verse by Ishle Park One World

Hannah, a Korean American girl from Queens, New York, and Angel, a Puerto Rican boy from Brooklyn, fall in love in the spring of 1993. Hannah, who comes from a strict Korean home, meets Angel, a free and beautiful boy, at a quinceañera:

Beyond flushed, sweating bodies pushed, pushing like cattle below black & buzzing speakers, under a torn pink streamer loose as a tendril of hair--lush-- his eyes. Darkluminous. Warm. A blush floods her. Hannah sucks in her breath, but can't pull back. Music fades. A hush he's a young buck in the underbrush, still in a disco ball dance of shadow & light Their forbidden love instantly and wildly blooms along the Jackie Robinson Expressway.

Told in seasons Angel & Hannah holds all of the tension and cadence of blank verse while adding dynamic and expressive language, creating new kinds of engrossing and magnetic forms. The hip-hop sonnets and poems are dynamic, arresting, observant, and magical, conveying the intimacies and sacrifices of love and addiction and the devastating realities of struggle and loss.

Committed to cultural details and the vernacular of Queens and Brooklyn, this is a hip-hop love story, not of the Capulets and the Montagues, but two New York City kids trying to survive and grow within their families and communities, driven by an all-consuming love.

The Eid Gift: An Adam and Zayneb Story by S.K. Ali Simon & Schuster

Even though it’s during Ramadan, a month of fasting and spiritual devotion, A and Z can’t help spending any and all free time with each other. Enter parents and their idea for a nikah at the end of Ramadan, on Eid day itself.

Which would appear to be the greatest Eid gift of all — except that, unbeknownst to each other, A and Z have been working on spectacularly surprising Eid gifts for the other all along.

The only thing? In true “The Gift of the Magi” fashion, these Eid gifts are at complete odds with the other. Along with a nikah day over-run with “benevolent” family interferences, A and Z are up for either recording this Eid as the best one ever, as a real marvel...or as a completely upsetting oddity.

Author's Note: WHEN IT TAKES PLACE:

The Eid Gift is a part of the Love from A to Z storyline; it occurs shortly before the epilogue. (If you haven’t read Love from A to Z yet, please consider doing so before reading this story—some of what occurs will not make sense otherwise.)

SOMETHING TO KEEP IN MIND:

While there’s nothing explicit in the story, it is more mature than S. K. Ali’s previous YA novels—there’s more physical touch here than in Love from A to Z— so readers are asked to exercise awareness of their reading comfort zones.

#the other side of perfect #where the rhythm takes you #from little tokyo with love #illusionary #angel & hannah #the eid gift #weneeddiversebooks

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wayward-mikaelson · 5 years ago

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His Little Sister

Word Count: 2041

Pairing: Jared x Reader

Characters: Reader, Jensen, Jared, Alex, Rich, Misha (Mentioned)

About: The Reader works on the set of Supernatural where her big brother Jensen stars along side his best friend Jared. The Reader has developed a major crush on Jared. The Reader somehow lands a roll on the show. A role that plays Sam Winchesters love interest which big brother Jensen isn’t too thrilled about.

Disclaimer: Language, Angst, Mention of depression, Mention of car accident, Implied Smut

Disclaimer 2: Any of the shorts that are hot and steamy, I want to put out there that it's in no way disrespectful towards Gen at all. I love her to death and respect that marriage between her and Jared. So when reading those shorts, know that it all takes place in an alternate world where they aren't married at all.

A/N: Tag all your SPN accounts

A/N 2: Tag any Sam/Jared Stans so they can see this

A/N 3: Should I write a Part 2? I feel Like there should be a part 2...Jensen find out his sister and best friend are sleeping together while at a convention maybe? YOU TELL ME!!!!

Forever Tag List: @donnaintx @myinconnelly1 @hobby27 @magssteenkamp @elansaidaris @440mxs-wife

*18+ CONTENT. ANYONE YOUNGER THAN THAT WILL NEED TO MOVE ON. I DON’T WANT TO RISK MY ACCOUNT BEING THANOSED.

**PLEASE DO NOT COPY AND PASTE MY WORK ANYWHERE WITHOUT MY PERMISSION AND WITHOUT GIVING ME THE PROPER CREDIT. I WORK TOO HARD ON MY WORK TO HAVE IT STOLEN. YOU CAN COPY AND PASTE THE LINK.

***THIS WORK IS ALSO POSTED ON IG, WATTPAD, AO3 SO PLEASE GO SO IT SOME LOVE OVER THERE

****FOLLOW ME ON IG, WATTPAD, AO3, AND TWITTER

*****DMS ARE OPEN FOR REQUESTS

"And...cut," Rich yells next to me. "That's a wrap! That was perfect!" I watch from the sidelines as he gets up from his directors chair. I watch as he makes his way towards Jensen and Jared. "Okay, now, I know it's late and everyone wants to get some sleep but, I want to run something pass you guys first." Rich pulls the two off set and outside. I look at the time on my phone and see that it's almost one in the morning.

"Want to head to my trailer for a drink?" Alex is next to me. He's still in his Jack outfit and still looking like a 16 year old boy who hasn't grown facial hair yet. He's been pinning after me for the last few years since I started working on the set of Supernatural. Everyone knew it too. Even my big brother, Jensen did. But I didn't feel that way towards Alex.

"Alex," I sigh. "Not tonight." I start to gather my things and make my way towards my brothers trailer. I normally stay at a hotel unless we have nights like this.

"Another time then?" Alex asks after me.

"She's not into you man," Jensen come up behind us hold some papers. "I could have told you that. I practically know who she's into." True, I think, but not this time. I couldn't tell him who it was because it was his best friend.

Ever since I started working on set, I saw Jared differently. He was no longer my brothers best friend to me. He was this funny and smart attractive man that smiled every time our eyes met. He even looks at me differently. Not the 'that's Jensen's baby sister' look. The look he give me always makes me blush. I would like to think Jared's into me but he was always going on some date with some chick.

"Sorry, Alex," I walk off with Jensen.

"It's all good," Alex walks off as well.

"You really should get back into dating," Jensen says handing me the papers in his hands as we walked to his trailer. "Anyway, we should talk about this."

I look at the papers. "It's a script," I say giving my brother a weird look.

Jensen wraps an arm around my shoulder. "Yeah, it's your script. The original chick who was casted as Opheila quit today. Rich and the others think you're perfect for the job."

I choke on whatever saliva is in my mouth. "My what?!" I exclaim pushing my brother away. "No! I haven't acted since my accident. And that was a year before I even took this job to help out on set."

Some years ago, I had a small but recurring role on the show Riverdale. In between filming and visiting home one day, I got into a bad car accident. My entire left leg was busted up and needed screws and rods. I was put out of work for months and my character on Riverdale was written and killed off. I was depressed because of it and then out of the blue Jensen pulled strings to get me back to work. My life was just starting to come back together and my limp was nearly gone too.

"I know," Jensen grabs my shoulder. "This could be your comeback. Give it a shot and if you don't like it, that's fine and Rich can suck my dick and get a new actress."

No one, and I mean no one, hyped me up and supported me and encouraged me like Jensen did. "Okay, here's to a comeback" I smile and Jensen pulls me into a hug. "Why did Rich want to talk to Jared as well?"

Jensen was quiet for a few minutes. "Well, this character we've been told, becomes a love interest of Sams."

I stop walking. "I see," It's a good thing it's dark because I can feel my face burning. Hot. "How does Jared feel about that?" I'm genuinely curious.

"Oh he's cool with it," Jensen continues to walking. I can tell that part of it is bugging him.

"And you?" I grab his arm and turn him around. "You don't seem or look to thrilled."

Jensen made a face. "I'm thrilled you got this roll. I've been dying to see you back in action acting again. I mean look at you. Beautiful and that limp you always complained about is gone. I just am having a hard time seeing my baby sister and best friend get friendly on camera."

I laugh out loud. I'm sure it's the fact that I am God awfully tired. "It'll be our characters getting close, not us." I hook my arm into his and we walk the rest of the way to the trailer.

"Rich is giving everyone the weekend off so we can focus on these lines." Jensen holds the trailer door open. Filming will start on Monday."

"Oi, that soon? Guess we get some sleep and start first thing."

Over the next few weeks, I learned more about my character. Ophiela, was also a hunter who hunted with the Winchesters a few times in the past. She and Sam also had a nice fun filled night before they lost contact. Turns out my character was going to be in the remaining season. Which to my surprise Jared was excited about. That kind of confused Jensen and made me blush hard that I had to find a way to hide my face from them all.

Getting back into acting wasn't hard. Acting with Misha around was hard. I never wanted to strangle someone so bad for purposefully trying to mess me up. I started to feel more and more myself behind the camera and delivering lines. Jensen even mentioned to me one night that I was getting that glow in my eyes when I acted. Rich was even impressed with my acting. About a month after taking the role and making it my own, we are about to wrap a scene where Sam and Ophiela are arguing. Our on set chemistry was fire. Everyone loved it.

Jared slams a book on the bunker set table. "What happened if we got there too late and found you dead?"

I lean over the table. "Then I would have died, Sam. You can't control that. Hell you can't even control your temper when it comes to my safety. Now if you will, I am going to wash off this hunt and go to bed." I take a few steps and Jared grabs my upper arm. "What the hell, Sam?"

"You don't see it do you," Jared starts to pull me towards him. Knowing whats going to happen, I can't help but feel nervous and giddy all at the same time. Jared has me up against his chest sweeping loose hair from my face. "I can't loose you." He cups my face and starts to pull me close when something loud crashes in the distance.

"Uh, sorry, about that," Jensen says picking up whatever he knocked over. Jared and I step away and I see irritation on his face.

"That was so perfect!" Rich whines from the directors chair. "Jensen, dammit, you need to be more careful." Rich comes around the corner. "I guess we pick this up tomorrow." Then he leaves.

"I'm going to go to my trailer," Jared walks off and I feel his hand slip out of mine and I realize that we had still been holding hands. I watch as he walks away.

"I really am sorry," Jensen says standing next to me. I look at him and I don't see a single regret about the incident on his face. He did that on purpose. That bastard.

"What the fuck, Jay?!" I ask pushing him. "The scene was going smoothly and it was perfect and you ruined it." I storm off leaving Jensen staring after me with a confused look on his face.

I walk way passed the trailer I share with Jensen. I walk pass Misha's trailer, Alex's trailer, and so on until I find myself standing at Jared trailer door. My heart is pounding as I hesitate to knock on his door. I don't what possessed me to go to his trailer but here I am.

"Jared," I knock on his door. "It's me."

The door opens and there stands Jared. In a t-shirt. "Hey," he says with a small smile. "Is your brother around?" The way he said brother confirmed he is just as irritated with him as I am.

"No, he's on set still or going to the local bar," I smile. "Can I come in?" Jared's small smile gets bigger. He steps aside and I walk into his trailer. It's neat and clean. I've only been in here a few times for only a few minutes. "I'm sorry, my brother can be a real dick sometimes." I say sitting on his small couch.

Jared grabs two beers, opens one and hands me it. "Yes he can be," He takes a sip of his beer. "The scene was perfect and going so smoothly." He sits next to me. I can't help but look the muscle in his arm that was close to brushing up on mine.

"It really was," I take a drink of my beer. "Our characters were about to have an amazing moment." I glance at Jared who's looking at me with those same eyes he was giving me on set.

"They can still have that moment," I see Jareds hand slide towards mine and without thinking I take hold of it. "Just without a camera." He adds taking his thumb and rubbing it my hand.

I blush and smile. "They totally can," I manage to out in a whisper.

Jared starts to lean in towards me. My heart is racing so I take a deep breath and close my eyes. Jared's head meets mine and he rests there breathing deeply. He's as nervous as me. I open my eyes and see he's staring deep into them. It's like my soul connects with his. It feels right. It's perfect. Licking my lip, I tilt my head up and press my lips to his.

The moment that they touch, every part of my body turns to jello. Jared lets go of my hand to cup my face and hold it to his. When his tongue pushes pass my lips and starts to explore my mouth, the beer bottle in my hand slips out of my hand and onto the floor with a loud clang. I pull back to pick it up but Jared pulls me back to him.

"Don't worry about that," I hear him set his beer down and use that hand to pull me onto his lap. Both legs rest on either side of his. I feel his erection pressing through his jeans and mine. I relax more of my weight and roll my hips against his. With a small but deep growl, Jared's lips land on mine again. Picking me and setting me on the small trailer counter.

I wrap my legs around him to keep him between me. I feel him press himself firmly into my jeans and I can feel how wet I am already for him. I moan into his mouth as he does it again. Jared pulls back and whips his shirt off. I do the same and unclasp the bra I am wearing. "You like what you see?" I ask as Jared stares at bare chest.

"Do I?" He leans in and brushes his lips from my cheek to my ear where he nips just below. I suck in a deep breath. "I fucking think it's beautiful." He wraps his arm around me and carries me to his bed where he plops me down on the bed. He stares down at me as he takes his pants off. "Now, why don't we see how quiet you can be while I fuck you hard into this mattress."

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straightfacedstrangeness · 4 years ago

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Not that anyone asked (but seriously I’d LOVE for someone to talk to me about PokeSpe (just no spoilers past vol 13)) but since I made an offhand remark about my Top 5 favorite characters, it occurred to me that I actually DO have approximately 5 top favorite characters, and I’m procrastinating on work, so I’m gonna ramble

**just in case, note that a lot of this will revolve around my childhood experience with gender in a “I’m AFAB (and present-day me still identifies as a cis girl) but I don’t fit in with what media is telling me girls are like” way, a brief childhood feeling of homophobia, and probably general TMI about my opinions and emotions throughout my life, haha

1. Yellow

Okay, so, I was a little kid when Pokemon Adventures started coming out in English, back when manga was released as single-issue monthly comic books instead of complete volumes. So I was rereading the same chapters over and over while anxiously awaiting the rest of the story (and wound up missing a bunch of issues anyway)

I enjoyed the RGB arc, I thought it was fun, but I didn’t LOVE the series until Yellow showed up. At that age my ideal crush was “a cute boy my age who would be nice to me” and Yellow was presented to the reader as a cute boy my age who was sweet and kind and gentle, but also good in a fight, as all shounen protags must be. Extra bonus points because they had just a few physically weak Pokémon and tried to fight battles in a way that minimized damage to their own and the opponent’s Pokémon, which meant they fought in a particularly smart and clever way. And I was considered “smart” for being good at school, so being a SMART cute “boy” my age who would be nice to me, Yellow was PERFECT. I mean, I loved the arc in general because of the clever battles, and the mystery of what had happened to Red, why these people were after Pikachu, why Yellow was so secretive about themself and their mission, etc was really engaging. But also I adored Yellow as a character and partly in a “I wonder if ‘he’ would like me??” kind of way X’D So to my tiny child self who didn’t even know it was possible to like-like someone of the same gender (because I hadn’t read Cardcaptor Sakura yet XD ), the reveal that Yellow was a “girl” was devastating—I had to cross out floating hearts on at least one drawing of us holding hands (scandalous!) and, while kind of stunned and shaken for a while, decided that what I’d felt all along was a deep, intense desire to be friends X’D (which probably wasn’t too far from the truth since I was pre-puberty and later turned out to be asexual)

(Also note that I never got the RGB issue that had the chapter where Red helps a little ‘girl’ capture a Rattata—later proven to be Yellow’s backstory—so the gender reveal really came out of nowhere for me.)

But anyways, I still love Yellow as a character for all the above reasons, without the crush aspects because I’m way older than them now.

Also when I reread the series ten years ago, I finally realized “wait, aside from surprising the reader, there’s no real plot reason for Yellow to pretend to be a ‘boy’ except that Green told ‘her’ to—so why did ‘she’ do it?”...and because at that time I didn’t even know that nonbinary genders existed, I decided it was cus they had low self-esteem and pretending to be a different person gave them courage (the same reading I had for Mulan at the time). These days I’m more inclined to “yeah, I think Yellow’s nonbinary,” but that other interpretation was deeply relatable to me and only made me love Yellow even more.

2. Bill

Bill’s definitely a character I’ve grown to love more as an adult, since I’ve gone from seeing myself as “a protagonist doing cool things” to “a side character just living their life who hopefully gets to do something once in a while.” But as a kid and now, I like him mostly for the slapstick and goofy expressions and the (early chapters Viz translations) outrageous accent X’D My brain desperately craves endorphins and the best way to get em is through a good laugh.

But also, I liked that he was introduced as a goofy character-of-the-week who got into ridiculous trouble and had to be rescued, but then kept being brought back, was slowly built up to be the “smart sidekick who explains things,” and eventually got to the point where he was participating in big battles (the Yellow finale on Cerise Island). I rambled about this in the tags of another post, but I liked that he was a character who was “weak” without being “useless.” As a kid who was good at school, I was obsessed with being good at things and had developed a black-and-white view of the world where either you were “strong/smart” or “weak/stupid” to the point that failing or just being not-so-good at anything was devastating (it still kind of is), because that meant I was actually “weak/stupid” when I was supposed to be “strong/smart.” So it was kind of awesome that this guy who kept getting into trouble and having to be rescued—and didn’t even want to BE part of the final battle—managed to hold his own and get through it and help out instead of being a burden that dragged everyone down. Seriously, he used a MAGIKARP effectively—the Pokémon everyone makes fun of for being “useless” and he used its one attack to save his life!

(Bonus points for all this happening in contrast to my devastating childhood experience of stanning The One Girl Character in every popular shounen series, waiting desperately for her to get to do something in battle, and then her one spotlight episode revolved around her struggling because she was so weak...not only was that actually happening to a boy for once, it was actually happening in a more satisfying/empowering way :’D )

3. Gold

I have extremely specific tastes when it comes to “the dumb shounen/action movie protag,” because as a kid I hated it when the main character was “dumb” because I was “smart” (re: good at school) and people who were “dumb” shouldn’t deserve to be the main character and have all the cool powers and save the world and stuff. As an adult, I hate it when male characters are dumb and/or jerks but it’s treated as fine or even sexy(??) and the other characters fawn over them, and I generally still kind of hate it when characters who are dumb and/or jerks get the big important role when there’s a female character RIGHT THERE who’s more competent (and OF COURSE she has to wind up falling in love with him)

But anyway, I have extremely specific tastes, and Gold is it X’D He’s the perfect combination of “unshakably confident in his own stupid/egotistic views” and “treated as annoying and/or comic relief by the rest of the cast” with a bonus dash of actually being really clever in battle (so my inner child goes “Ah yes, technically, he is ’smart,’ and therefore...worthwhile“) Making me laugh while also impressing me is like the key to my heart.

4. Crystal

I’m too lazy to look it up, but when Viz was publishing Pokemon Adventures as monthly comics, they must have switched to publishing it as trade paperbacks only and/or had a huge gap between the end of Yellow and the start of GSC, because for YEARS I’d thought Yellow was the end of the series and was shocked the first time I saw later volumes. (My dad was buying us the monthly issues at the local comic store, and either they wouldn’t have ordered the trade paperbacks or he wouldn’t have thought to check those shelves.)

Anyway, that’s a long lead-in to the statement of “Crystal would automatically be my #1 or #2 if I’d read her arc as a kid.” She’s a girl, she wears pants, she’s EXTREMELY smart (genius-level “book-smarts” about every Pokémon’s behaviors and weaknesses PLUS being clever in a battle), was tough as nails (she KICKED her Pokéballs!!), had no interest in romance or her appearance, AND had a short arc about losing her confidence and training herself back up to full power. I would have KILLED for a character like that when I was a little girl being told that “girls don’t like action shows like Dragon Ball Z” (but I was a girl and I did???) and that girls were supposed to be pretty and obsessed with fashion and dating, and that girls were never the main character of action series, just side characters who either did nothing or got one chance to do something and were pathetically weak (see above, and/or Sakura’s fight against Ino (Naruto), those couple filler eps where Téa/Anzu played Duel Monsters (Yu-Gi-Oh), Videl getting pummeled by Spopovich (DBZ), etc).

So anyway, she’s awesome, she’s exactly the type of character I would’ve loved as a kid. The only reason she’s behind Gold here is because at my age, “makes me laugh” > “the kind of main character I used to wish I could be”

5. Green (the girl trainer...I’m just too loyal to the Viz version to call her “Blue”...)

I’m trying not to rehash the same “I’m a girl but none of the girls in my shows/comics are like me!” childhood woes over and over, haha, but as much as I always enjoyed Green for being extremely clever and outsmarting the boys and being funny when she did so, she always lost points with me for being “pretty” and flirting to get her way, because that put her in the box of “girls are supposed to be pretty and desired by boys and obsessed with their appearance and romance” that was so foreign and disheartening to me as a kid.

But her staredown with Ho-oh at the end of the GSC arc TOTALLY got me. As a sad adult with anxiety, watching characters who are absolutely terrified overcome their fear, watching characters who are completely beaten down struggle back to their feet and keep fighting, is like my ultimate power fantasy. That sequence genuinely had me in tears.

Also her bond with Silver is super precious, especially since that’s like the first time in the series we’ve seen her be genuinely emotional and vulnerable with someone instead of teasing or manipulating them.

Honorable mention: Sapphire

I haven’t gotten up to R/S in my reread yet, and I only read that arc once over like a weekend ten years ago, but I’m pretty sure she’s gonna be a Top Fave cus again there’s that “I'm not like other girls!” childhood feel (last time I’m saying it, I promise)

It’s a story arc where one protag wants to fight the gyms and the other protag wants to win the beauty contests, but the one who wants to fight the gyms is the girl!! And she’s the typical “dumb but extremely good at fighting” shounen protag but she’s the girl!! She’s feral and illiterate and a total tomboy and wins all her fights and she’s a GIRL!!!!

Anyway, those are my kids and my dude and my probably way-too-personal reasons why. If you wanna reblog, reply, or send an ask about your own faves...please

#pokemon adventures #rambling #crackpotawesomes #spent like an hour and a half on this oops

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bodytothefifthpower · 6 years ago

Note

Would you be able to go into the katya stuff if you dont mind ?? Im not sure if its being released after this so im just curious what exactly happened

Okay so clearly after all of the speculation and hostility in the fandom recently, some people are interested to learn how exactly Trixie Mattel: Moving Parts portrays Katya. I was at the premiere at Tribeca, and I’m happy to give you a brief overview of what was shown and my opinions on it.

FROM THIS POINT ON THERE ARE SPOILERS FOR TRIXIE MATTEL: MOVING PARTS! SCROLL PAST NOW IF YOU DON’T WANT ANY SPOILERS!

So while this is a film about Brian Firkus, the lynchpin of the whole film (the underpinning that holds the story together) is really Trixie & Katya’s relationship. Which is perfectly reasonable! They are a huge part of each other’s lives, and they just happened to be filming this documentary while all of Katya’s health issues were going on. To completely strike what happened from the record would, frankly, probably mean they couldn’t use a lot of the footage they had- to the point where I really think it could’ve scrapped whole chunks of the movie.

One of the first things they show in the film is Katya gifting Trixie with dolls that look like the two of them; it really portrays their friendship in a lovely light. Trixie also talks about how much she loves Katya and loves working with her, and about how everyone got to see their friendship develop over the course of filming UNHhhh. For those of us who know what’s coming, this obviously produces a lot of anxiety. But I have to tell you: that is just good filmmaking. To create a level of suspense like that is almost Greek Tragedy-eqsue with its dramatic irony.

The next part I’m going to talk about is one of the parts everyone is worried about: Katya’s last day on set at the Trixie & Katya Show. You can tell she’s unwell; she has a very short temper and very little patience for anything happening around her. But she also says “What I need is to quit, but she [Trixie] is my friend and I won’t do that to her.” Even though Katya is clearly unwell, the perspective of the film also paints her as sympathetic. Trixie’s reactions to what’s happening really does indicate that Katya is not in her right mind, and it’s not her fault. Obviously it hurt Trixie, for multiple reasons: one of her best friends is unwell, it seems like an important relationship in her life- and we learn that she doesn’t have a lot of them- is unraveling, and in addition to that, what’s happening could potentially permanently damage her career. The fact that she handles all of those issues with such humility and grace, while still trying to be understanding towards and a good friend to Katya really, REALLY speaks to her character.

The part that is most unflattering to Katya are the text messages she sends to Trixie after the premiere of All Stars 3. She says some incredibly nasty things about Trixie. She is downright mean. For those of us who know Katya though, that is just a clear indicator of how sick she was. I think we all know Katya in her right mind would not send someone- let alone one of her best friends- messages like that. But yeah, I can see how someone might feel hostile towards Katya after seeing what she did. But again, this is a thing that happened. It’s not made up for the sake of the film, and it’s not anyone slandering Katya’s name; it’s a real thing that really happened, and the only difference is that now you know about it. And again, I would like to remind everyone that this is a film about Trixie, not about Katya. So while you do walk away from the scene feeling sad for Katya (because obviously no one wants her to be unravelling like that), you mainly feel bad for Trixie. She clearly doesn’t deserve any of the ire Katya is throwing at her, as we’ve seen her trying to be a good friend. And that is what is expected! This is a film about Trixie, you know? Of course she’s the protagonist!

Overall, through the whole arc of the film that focuses on the dissolution of Trixie & Katya’s friendship the theme is really that Trixie wishes Katya was better, because she misses her friend. That’s the take away. Not that Katya is evil or anything, but that Trixie misses her friend. So do I think the film portrays Katya in a negative light? No. I think it shows the things she did- and they were not good things by any means- but, 1. It doesn’t blame her for her mental illness or addiction, and 2. It isn’t focused on the things that Katya did, but the way that it affected Trixie.

By the end of the film, we see that Trixie and Katya are friends again. It shows them having some funny- and at times tender- interactions backstage at Trixie’s LA Moving Parts show. Katya mentions that she’s better now, and we wrap up the film with Trixie & Katya back together again, and ready to take on the world. In terms of the storyline, it does feel like there’s a bit missing, because it goes from Trixie & Katya not being friends- and the uncertainty in the air over that- to suddenly they’re friends again with no explanation. From a story standpoint, I wish they would’ve included something about how they started on the road to recovering their friendship, rather than just jumping to it recovered.

Personally, I think the reason some fans are so freaked out about the way Katya is portrayed in the film is because they hold her up as this beacon of perfection. She’s mentally ill, but she’s still so funny and personable. She’s an addict, but she doesn’t appear to struggle- or if she does, she turns it into comedy. I think she’s what a lot of people who view themselves as broken hope they can be. But she’s not perfect. She is capable of hurting people. She’s capable of making horrible decisions, and getting sick, and relapsing, and ruining friendships, and honestly that is just the reality of it. We’re all capable of things like that! But you don’t love Katya because she’s perfect, you love her because she’s real. So if you’re angry in the name of your love for her that her reality is being shown, it’s possible that you love the idea of Katya, and you love what she represents, but you might not love the man himself. Just some food for thought.

Can you imagine if Katya heard everyone freaking out about the film portraying her in a bad light? The kind of pressure that’d put on her, to feel like her fans will only like her or support her provided she doesn’t slip up? Certainly that is not conducive to being supportive of her. Personally, I think holding celebrities to a level of perfection is just unfair. I think we as a fandom need to accept that sometimes Katya may not be well, and sometimes she might make mistakes, and it’s okay to acknowledge the things that have happened, and to still continue to love her.

One thing I can tell you for certain is that Trixie is NOT exploiting or taking advantage of Katya. From a purely legal standpoint, the filmmakers would have had to get Katya’s written consent to have her in the film. Katya quite literally would have had to sign off on it. Additionally, Trixie said that Katya had already seen the film. Katya was already aware of what was going to be shown. People seem to forget that Katya is a grown-ass man with autonomy, and that it wouldn’t have gone ahead without her foreknowledge. And after watching the film, I can say with certainty that Trixie absolutely wouldn’t have kept in anything that Katya didn’t okay; she’s too good and too thoughtful of a person to do something like that.

Another major thing people are forgetting, it seems, is that this is not a movie about Katya! This is about Trixie! There is a part in the movie where she says something along the lines of: “No one will want me without Katya.” It absolutely breaks my heart to think that Trixie has no idea how much we love her on her own, how much she means to us, how funny and talented she is by herself, and how much worth she has by herself. And the fact that all anyone wants to talk about is Katya- regarding Trixie’s movie- really irks me. Because she’s basically being proven right.

My last big point I’d like to make is directly related to something Trixie says in the film. She talks about how she gave all of those vague answers about Katya because it wasn’t her story to share, and she didn’t want to make the issue about herself when it clearly wasn’t. She points out that other queens were like, “we all struggle with things! Personally, I’ve dealt with [blank]!” And while the other queens were trying to demonstrate that Katya wasn’t alone, what they were really doing was making it about themselves. I can’t help but see a parallel in the fans that are angry over Katya’s portrayal in this film; the issue is about Katya, and Katya is clearly fine with it, so when you’re freaking out over it, aren’t you really just making it about yourself?

So, there are a plethora of reasons I think people should stop sending hate Trixie’s way because of this movie:

1. This is Trixie’s story. This is really what happened over the past year. To cut half of it out would be doing a disservice to Trixie and to the filmmakers.

2. The filmmakers had final say. They shot all the footage and edited it all together. Trixie really had no part in the creation of this movie aside from being the subject of it, and it’s not fair to throw hate her way for something she had very little control over; that’s like being mad at an actor for a decision the showrunners made.

3. To cut out the parts where Katya is unwell would be a disservice to Katya, because it says “we only want you when you’re perfect.”

4. Maybe someone who is struggling with addiction or who has a loved one struggling with addiction needs to see something like this! No one is being helped by just sweeping all the ugly parts under the rug.

5. Both of them have seen the movie, knew what was going to be shown, and were clearly okay with it because it went ahead and made the final cut.

6. It’s not anyone else’s business how either Trixie or Katya live their lives, or what they choose to share with their public.

7. Katya is not painted as some kind of monster. She’s painted as someone who is mentally unwell, sometimes sympathetic, sometimes not, but ultimately as a flawed human being, who does in fact get a redemption arc!

8. This is a movie about Trixie, not about Katya, and I think people need to respect that and stop shifting the focus.

In conclusion, what I walked away from this movie with was that, yes, it was very sad and at times disturbing to see Katya so hurt and broken. But more than anything, I walked away with an appreciation for Brian Firkus. For how selfless, and caring, and giving, and hardworking the man behind Trixie is. If you get a chance to see Trixie Mattel: Moving Parts I highly recommend you do so; I hope you’ll be just as in awe of Trixie as I am.

#I tried to be as clear as possible but let me know if you want further thoughts or clarifications!#honestly these are just my thoughts on the katya situation I have a lot more thoughts on the whole #specifically about how incredibly thoughtful and generous trixie is an her whole family dynamic #yes I did spend about two hours writing this- how was your Saturday night?#trixie mattel #trixie mattel: moving parts #brian firkus #katya zamolodchikova #brian mccook #long post #analysis #review #spoilers

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forestwater87 · 6 years ago

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Would you want Gwen and David to become a couple at the end of CampCamp? And adopt Max as well? Cuz' I do...

Gwenvid becoming canon is one of those things I simultaneously love and feel is unnecessary. The show will never let it be as pure and fluffy (or emo) as the fans will make it, anyway, and there is no force on earth that will stop me from shipping this ship with every ounce of my shriveled little heart, so I’m kinda ambivalent on the whole thing. (Besides, I know at least one of the showrunners is not at all into it, so I don’t see it happening no matter how much we may want it to. As long as they keep giving us little ship nuggets we can read way too much into, I’ll be good.)

Also I’m not convinced CC is the kind of show that needs an end, so “at the end” is one of those things that … eh, whatever. It’s an endless summer existing outside of time. Does it ever have to end, as long as they keep having new ideas?

As for the other part of this question … oh, boy. Anon, you did not ask me to go the fuck off on this question, but I gotta because I’ve been holding all this inside for literal years, and I don’t even care that this will make me hemorrhage followers because I’ve been very good and very quiet about it for a long-ass time and I just gotta –

I fucking hate Dad//vid.

And you know? I didn’t used to. My feelings, much like those regarding Cute Waitress, went from “how cute!” to “eh, not my thing but whatever,” and now we’ve circled all the way around to my entire soul lighting on rage-fire every time it’s mentioned, and just … I hate it so much … it’s just …

I feel like this deserves an explanation. And I think the people who’ve already blocked me or whatever aren’t going to read it, so let’s put it under a cut just for the sake of scrolling. But here’s the cliffs notes version:

1. It’s #NotAllDad//vid. There are some iterations of it I don’t hate, and even quite like.

2. David adopting Max, as a general concept, blows. There are exceptions – see #1 – but 99 times out of 100 I hate it with all of my hate. (The short reasons why: David is baby and Forest has Issues, it’s kiiiiinda racist?, and it’s lazy, boring, and way overdone.)

3. The fandom will not fucking chill about it – at the expense of all other explorations of David and Max’s relationship. And that makes me highkey annoyed.

That being said, anyone who’s worried my blog will become a cesspool of dad//vid hate, please don’t be concerned. This is like lancing a boil of something (I’m bad at metaphors). All the garbage pours out in one massive textblock, and then I go back to being more or less chill about the whole thing. We’re dealing with years of repression here. Shit’s gonna be a lot more intense than it needs to be, and then we’ll settle back down to our regularly-scheduled CC fluff times.

I’m hoping this doesn’t make the fandom hate me forever … but given #3 up there, I’m pretty dang scared it will.

(And hey, I don’t want Cute Waitress to explode in a pit of fire and snakes anymore, so maybe my opinion on dad//vid will change eventually too. Always hold out hope, right?)

1. #NotAllDad//vid

Like I said, I didn’t used to totally despise the whole Dad//vid thing. Like, I love the idea of David having been a counselor for so long that he just has ingrained Dad Instincts (see S4E14 for the most recent example of this). David as the Dad Friend? Good shit. David as the mother/father hen of his little cabal of campers? Very good shit. Nonliteral interpretations of dad//vid are usually really cute and fun and have some solid basis in canon, and I’m all about it.

Even some of the more literal David-adopts-Max AUs aren’t … the worst. Some of my friends have written versions of it that are original or at least were at the time and really compelling, and usually they found a way of skirting past the majority of the issues in #2. It can be done well.

It just … usually … isn’t.

And for that we gotta see #2.

2. David-Adopts-Max Sucks as a Concept

There is nothing good about the idea of David adopting Max, at least based on what we’ve currently seen in canon.

(Yes, I am aware that I should couch statements like that with “in my opinion” and “with exceptions” and the like, but that’s a lot of work for this and a bunch of the stuff I’m gonna say in a second, so please just assume for the purposes of everything I put on this blog that it’s in my opinion. I’m not out here dropping Cold Hard Facts about Camp Camp of all things; I’m just spewing my feelings.

I have lots of feelings.)

I don’t really have a cute little opening segment for this, so let’s skip the hors d’oeuvres and hop right into the meat of it:

David is Way Too Young to be a Father (According to Forest, Who Has Massive Emotional Baggage About These Things)

David is 24 goddamn years old. You know who shouldn’t be put in constant legal charge of a 10-year-old? Someone who is only 14 years older than him. If he’d had Max the old-fashioned way he would be too young to go on 16 and Pregnant.

That is too fucking young.

I know that some people become parents that young, and even younger. I’m not saying your experiences are bad or invalid. I’m just saying, from the standpoint of being 26, that if one of my two-years-younger friends told me they were adopting a kid they knew from work, I would tell them they were fucking bonkers and to hand that child over to a grown-up immediately. This is especially true of David, who has remarkable emotional maturity but is also mentally about 8 years old. Gwen is the adult at that camp, and David is such a baby.

Please don’t give the baby a baby.

Also, I’m terrified of having children. I never plan to, I’ve only recently accepted the fact that I don’t have to (grew up religious; it was kinda a whole thing), and get knee-jerk defensive over the idea of anyone my age or younger having children. It freaks me out, and that’s not a good or right emotional reaction to have but it’s mine, and I lowkey panic every time I think of David having children because if he should have a child at 24 then I’m already late.

Yes, I get the feeling that I’m running behind. For something I don’t actually want, ever. In comparison to a fictional character. Whose fatherhood decisions are not even remotely canon.

TL;DR I have issues and my other arguments are decidedly more valid than this one

So How About That Racism, Huh?

I know this has been a matter of some debate in the CC fandom for a while now … but you know what? It’s not nearly enough of a debate. People should absolutely be talking more about the potential problematique aspects of having a way too young white kid take a child from his immigrant parents on some pretty shoddy evidence (which I’ll address in the next section). There’s some White Savior stuff going on there, some negatively-stereotyping-poc-and-immigrant parents going on there … I’m not saying these should completely disqualify any dad//vid AUs or speculation or anything, but it should absolutely be much more of a conversation than it currently is.

(This is why one of the few David-adopts-Max concepts I like is one in which his parents have died. Not only is it more interesting – again, see the next bit – but it neatly sidesteps some potential gross stereotyping, and that’s just always rad.)

I feel like the common counterargument to this is that there are not-great parents of color and not-great immigrant parents IRL, so wouldn’t it be dishonest not to portray that in fiction as well?

I mean … I dunno.

I’m not here to tell anyone how to write the One Pure Dad//vid AU or anything. But I will say that I don’t think most people in love with this concept have done anything resembling due diligence in considering how best to sensitively portray the complicated familial, racial, and other implications of this particular AU or concept.

Besides, it’s not real life. It’s fiction, which means any decisions are being made deliberately. It’s a choice to depict Max’s parents as abusive and neglectful monsters who immigrated to America to give their son a better life but that’s for the next section, and it’s not inherently a bad choice, but it’s one that should be made thoughtfully, with an eye to the history of negative stereotypes that already run rampant in fiction. That’s just part of the writing process, and not one that should be shunted aside because it’s more work and less dramatic than creating the biggest of big bads for David to make grand speeches at and/or punch in the face.

Just Not Very Interesting (And Done to Death)

Regarding the overdone thing: Reading a David-adopts-Max AU most of the time is just like reading every other David-adopts-Max AU; I’m pretty sure I could put all these fics on transparencies, overlay them on top of one another, and still have a legible story because they differ so little.

Now to be clear: This – along with the rest of my points in this section – are about personal taste. Some people love reading the same story over and over again, and it brings immense comfort to them. That’s okay, and you shouldn’t feel bad about reading (or writing) these stories and not wanting to break your back trying to find a new angle for it. Cringe culture is canceled, and my personal tastes should not dictate the fandom. You do you.

That being said, I’m also allowed to be so bored by almost all of these fics that I nearly fall asleep scrolling the AO3 feed.

And the frustrating thing is, it would take so little to make it different. All it would take is asking: what if it wasn’t that simple? What if his parents aren’t all bad? What if they’re trying their best, but aren’t able for whatever reason to care for Max the way he needs to be? (I’m thinking Deja’s mom from This Is Us, for a cool example.) What if they later come to regret whatever behavior is making them so sucky, and reconcile in some fashion with their son? What if David and/or Max have fundamentally misread the situation, due to being on the outside and a kid, respectively, and it turns out his parents are actually making the best decisions they can in this situation and David doesn’t need to literally become Max’s dad, but integrates into the family in another way? (Seriously, even “what if they’re dead instead of evil?” would blow my mind in terms of originality. It’s been done, but not nearly enough.)

So that’s the overdone thing out of the way. What about lazy and boring?

It just seems to me that, based on the evidence we’ve been given in the show, there are infinitely more nuanced and creative alternatives to “Max’s parents are canonically abusive and neglectful and deserve to have their child ripped away from them by the guy who sees him at his job like 2-3 months out of the year.” I, in fact, refuse to believe Max’s parents are bad people based on the current evidence, and won’t do so unless canon forces me to see no other option.

Because as of right now, I just don’t buy it.

Didn’t show up to Parents’ Day: Well, we know they immigrated from India to escape “menial labor” (S1E4), and we know capitalism stomps all over the kind of people stuck doing menial labor, so what if they were unable to get away from work or they’d be fired? Hell, what if they couldn’t afford it for whatever reason – car broke down, they don’t have a phone or were out of data, they got hurt or sick or something came up that was interpreted by a small child as a lack of interest because he’s been shown that he doesn’t fully understand either adults’ motivations (all of S1) or the complexities of living in adult society, though he thinks he does (S1E4)?

Didn’t give him an activity: What if their grasp of English isn’t great? It’s a damn hard language to learn, and I sure as hell couldn’t pick up a second language if I was working to the bone to support my family. I’m exhausted trying to get through my 5 minutes of French on Duolingo, and I have a relatively cushy job and the benefit of an owl harassing me every few hours. Maybe they looked at the absurd camp activities and assumed they were misreading something, so they handed it over to their son (who is clearly fluent) to pick something he likes. Maybe they wanted to give him some responsibility and a sense of autonomy in deciding what he wanted to do for the summer, and he was so annoyed at being sent off to camp that he refused to do it and interpreted their hands-off nature as not caring. Maybe they were tired and just told him to pick something and it’s as simple as that, because parents are allowed to be exhausted sometimes. Just strikes me as pretty bizarre that they’d bother sending their son to a summer camp (and those things aren’t cheap, even one as not-awesome as Camp Campbell) but not be invested enough to give him the activity. Saving all year to scrape together enough money for a summer camp, sure, but filling out one line on a piece of paper? Pfft, who has time for that bullshit?

(I recognize that assuming they’re poor based on a single line about “menial labor” might seem like a bit of a stretch to some people. But honestly, to me it’s no more of a stretch than assuming that they hate or don’t care about their son, or any of the other wild theories thrown around about Max’s parents all the dang time. At least this one is relatively new.)

Sent him a sweatshirt and a short note: Again, maybe their written English isn’t great. Some people are better at a spoken language than a written one. Or maybe they didn’t have enough time to write a long note, or they knew Max wouldn’t read it (he doesn’t seem like the type to be all that into long emotional letters). Regardless, they knew to send him something he’d like that would likely be worn down by constant wear at camp. And sweatshirts aren’t cheap. Neither is mailing a package. Just seems like a surprising amount of effort to go to if they don’t care about or love him.

Sent him to Camp Campbell for the summer: Let’s say they’re poor, based on the evidence we have. It makes sense to assume that they work relatively “unskilled” jobs, or are in school, or both. Because those jobs don’t offer benefits or a lot of money, we can also reasonably assume that they either work multiple jobs, long hours, or both. They probably don’t have family in the area or even the country, and it wouldn’t be reasonable to expect neighbors or friends to take their son in all day, every day, all summer so he’s not home alone while they’re at work (especially considering he’s not all that easy to get along with). He’s familiar with the city (S3E11), so we can assume he’s grown up in an urban environment, which means he’s probably to some extent a latchkey kid. Sending him to a summer camp would get him out of the city, around people his own age, where he’d be supervised and kept busy while his parents are at work until school starts. Camps are expensive, but I imagine Camp Campbell might be the best they can afford, and they’d assume it’s better than him sitting in an empty apartment all day.

Max’s insistence they don’t care: He’s … ten years old. Not only has he made it clear that he assumes the worst of most people, including adults, but it’s also relatively common for kids whose parents worked a lot while they were growing up to interpret that busyness as a lack of interest in them. It’s hard to understand things like expenses or financial security as a kid and view it as “my parents are never around and so they don’t love me.” Hopefully when he’s older he’d appreciate everything they’ve sacrificed for him, but at 10 years old it’s expected he’d feel neglected.

I’m just saying, maybe a borderline emotionally unstable child isn’t the most reliable source, is all.

This isn’t rock solid, I realize; I’ve made a lot of leaps of logic and assumptions extrapolating from what we’ve been given. But I don’t see it as any less plausible than his parents hating him or whatever the prevailing fan theories are, and more importantly: it’s a fuck of a lot more interesting (yes, yes, in my opinion). I think adding nuance and sympathy to Max’s parents will always end up more interesting than “good David vs evil parents.”

Of course, we’re in a bit of a limbo since we don’t know necessarily where RT is going to take this. There is every chance they’re going to drop the bomb that Max’s parents are literally as bad as everyone has made them out to be – and worse. Maybe they’re actually Xemug. Fuck if I know. And if that happens, I’m gonna call it out for being the cheapest and least-interesting of the possible options. Bad, lazy writing that pits pure good against pure evil is always gonna suck, even if it comes from the writers of one of my favorite shows.

I really, really hope they don’t go with that (to finally, I guess, answer Anon’s question fully). And I’m pretty forgiving when it comes to things people hate CC for: Dolph doesn’t bother me, most of the problematic episodes don’t bother me (that pee one is still pretty rough though), but if they go the “Max’s parents are the devil and that is why Max is the way he is” route, I’m gonna … well, just be so profoundly disappointed that the showrunners could’ve done something interesting and decided instead to go for the lowest-hanging fruit, that’s all.

FINALLY:

3. This Fucking Fandom

So here’s the thing. Dad//vid is unique among the “ships” in the fandom in that it is deliberately placed as “the anti-Max//vid.” And I understand why that was done, and I appreciate it holding up that particular vanguard; max//vid has no place in dad//vid, and vice versa.

But the problem with dad//vid being set up as the not-max//vid is that everything that isn’t dad//vid is suddenly viewed as “max//vid-lite.” Even when that makes literally zero sense.

See, even when I was briefly into dad//vid in its very literal “David adopts Max from Max’s evil parents” form, what I was really drawn to was the idea of David being Max’s older brother. Back when the fandom was like 100 fics on AO3, I had started planning out this long plot involving David taking on a brotherly role to this kid I thought really needed one. Admittedly I’m just a sucker for sibling relationships, but from the beginning I’ve been all about this brotherly bond, and so when a popular artist came up with the term “bro//vid” and it started gaining traction, I was all over that noise. There was finally a version of this relationship that wasn’t either “Max and David fucking” or “David literally adopts Max and becomes his literal father,” and I couldn’t be more excited.

And then … I found out that apparently “bro//vid” was becoming synonymous with “max//vid but secretly.” And … man, it really sucked to suddenly be treated like I was supporting pedophilia because I didn’t like the idea of David-adopts-Max as much as the whole big brother thing. I can’t even imagine how much it must suck if your favorite iteration of Max and David is something along the lines of mentor/friendship, without some sort of buffer of “well they’re basically (or literally) related.” Because if “these two as brothers” is max//vid-lite, then I can’t fucking imagine what that would be called.

And even when it’s not specifically about max//vid, it just keeps cropping up. I posted about the Season 4 premiere and expressed how much I saw a cute, brotherly relationship between David and Max, and someone immediately replied saying that they thought it was more like father-son. Which … yeah, fine, I don’t care if you see it like father-son, go nuts, but I am getting really sick of the fact that father-son is the only acceptable “ship” and everything must lean in that direction, no exceptions. (I know, it’s not a ship technically, but I don’t know what else to call it. Don’t read anything weird into me calling it that.)

I don’t think “please just let me enjoy these two and their relationship dynamic without making it pedophilia or insisting David adopt Max from his terrible evil parents” is that tough an ask.

Or at least, it really shouldn’t be. But somehow it … kind of is.

And that sucks.

(Also, I hate the whole “Max is David’s favorite camper” thing. It’s not technically tied to dad//vid, but it does often come hand-in-hand with that and it just irks me to no end. If David has such blatant favorites, he is terrible at his job and kind of a douchebag. I think he gravitates towards the camper(s) who need attention the most, because he likes feeling like he’s made a difference, but I don’t think David would just straight-up pick a favorite like that, not when he has a full camp of kids who need him. Just saying.)

#in which i rant a lot #campcamp #Anonymous #i am very sorry anon #and others #if you read all of this i will give you a cookie #if it made you think i will give you a hug

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jeidafei · 6 years ago

Text

D.Gray-Man Vol.26: Komui’s Lounge (Extended) 3/5

>> Part 1 <<

>> Part 2 <<

Question 13: How is the cover image for the tankobon (comic book) and Jump SQ. RISE (the magazine) decided?

Lavi: The author has full liberty for the comic book’s cover, but in the magazine’s case, the exclusive designer will ask the author to draw it according to their image of the cover.

Allen: You know so much, Lavi. I’d expect no less from the author’s bosom friend!

Lavi: Are you dissing me, Allen-san?

Marie: So the designer is the one who decides the character and their pose?

Lavi: Yep. I heard sometimes they even request color tones as well. Because the cover is the face of the whole magazine, Hoshino’s nervous when drawing the magazine’s covers, unlike the comic book’s.

Link: On a side note, on the cover of this latest Volume 26, General Cross is holding a toothpick in his mouth.

Allen: Do we have to go into such detail?

Link: I thought there might be those who are wondering.

Lavi: That’s because back in Volume 14, she drew General Cross holding a cigarette and got scolded.

Bak: What’s wrong with that? Couldn’t she draw whatever she wants to?

Lavi: Well, after all, this is still a shounen manga

(T/N: comic written for teenage boys).

Wisely: Grown-up issues, indeed.

Question 14: Link, between English and French tea, which do you prefer?

Link: We’ve received a number of beverage-related questions. For example, How many sugar cubes does the Millennium Earl consume during teatime? and Exactly how delicious is Lenalee Lee’s coffee? As for my preference, I’d probably say English tea. Inspector Lvellie prefers French tea, though, so I’ve had a great deal of that as well. The Earl prefers English, doesn’t he?

Wisely: Correct you are. The Earl has an awfully sweet tooth. He puts in 20 sugar cubes and lots of milk for a cup of tea. He’s such a dear. He’s moping lately after Desires told him to cut back on his sugar intake. What a dear.

Allen: I wonder why he would consider that adorable.

Lavi: There’s more sugar than tea in your tea, too, right Allen?

Allen: SUPER SWEET TEA WITH SALTY THINGS IS A MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN!!!

Lavi: Do you really have to yell it?

Link: Make sure you brush your teeth well, Walker. You’re always sleeping right after your meals.

Allen: Roger roger roger.

Link: Only once is enough!

(T/N: In Japan, saying “yes” (hai) more than once is considered rude, as it shows annoyance. I get that a lot from my coworkers.)

Marie: You had tea parties with Lenalee and Miranda sometimes, right Allen?

Bak: WHAT!? Walker! You!

Allen: Eh? Wait! It’s just because they said they’ll give me sweets. There’s no ulterior motive on my part! Besides, it’s more like Link and Lenalee’s tea discussion with me tagging along than a tea party, actually.

Link: What are you talking about? I was the one accompanying you!

Allen: Well, aren’t you the one who did the most talking?

Link: That’s because you were busy eating the whole time, isn’t it? Lenalee Lee seems to make a hobby out of serving the Science Division coffee and tea, so we simply exchanged ideas on tea leaves and brewing. She’s more of an expert than even me on tea, after all.

Marie: Looks like she’s been studying up for the Science guys’ sake. She learned coffee brewing straight from Head Chef Jeryy himself too, and her coffee’s simply awesome.

Lavi: Plus, you also get to behold that adorable face as she hands you your cup with a smile, and it enhances the experience. Hey, Allen, Lenalee’s been taking really good care of her hands, ya know? Said she wanna serve us tea with beautiful hands. Ah, she really is a lady...

Allen: I’m getting all choked up right now.

Bak: Lenalee-san...you’re wonderful. (in love♡)

Question 15: Does Lavi wash his face with his eyepatch on? Or wash his face in secret?

Allen: He leaves it on.

Lavi: I TAKE IT OFF! OF COURSE I TAKE IT OFF! But yeah, I do wash my face in secret!

Allen: You always leave it on when we use the Order’s communal bath together, don’t you? Why do you have to be so secretive about it? Stop being so stuck-up and let us see it already!

Lavi: Argh! Stop, Allen! Stop yanking! Aaaaaargh!

Marie: Oi, Allen! Lavi told you to stop, didn’t he?

Link: Walker, stop wasting our precious paper bullying Bookman Jr.

Wisely: There, there. It’s fine, isn’t it? Our readers will get stressed out if we keep it all stiff and heavy. Besides, the boy hasn’t seen Bookman Jr. in ages and he’s just thrilled.

Allen: That’s not it!

Bak: That aside, why do you need to hide it? Is there some secret behind it?

Lavi: Well, about that...I really can’t say anything.

Question 16: Since when did Supervisor Komui and Head Chef Jeryy become close friends?

Marie: When...? They already seem close by the time Head Chef Jeryy transferred to Headquarters, though.

Bak: That’s because Komui was the one who recommended Jeryy for the transfer. Jeryy was a cook in the Asian Branch at first, and he went to all sorts of trouble taking care of Komui back when he just joined the Order. Komui was a completely different person back then, you see. He had this slightly dangerous streak about him, so Jeryy probably couldn’t find it in him to just leave him be.

Komui seemed prejudiced against Jeryy for a while there, but then he might’ve lost the battle of wills, and before I knew it, they’ve already become close. After that, when Komui was promoted to Supervisor, Jeryy was the first he called over to Headquarters. It might’ve been to help Lenalee-san who was mentally ill back then, I reckon.

Link: I don’t mind them being close, but calling each other by the likes of “Komie-sweetie” and “Jerry-deary” in the vicinity of Order members is quite out of line in my opinion.

Wisely: That Jeryy-summat lad’s food seems real delicious to me. I’d love to try some.

Allen: Negative. Jeryy-san is mine.

Lavi: He’s not yours...

Question 17: Are Noah Memories comprised of only original memories of the past? Though the Noah Memories are passed on from person to person, can we conclude that the human memories of previous Noah hosts are not passed on to the next Noah host as well?

Lavi: Now this is an interesting question.

Wisely: Hmmm. Yes, the memories are passed on. When we are awakened as Noah, an enormous amount of memories and data would come rushing into our heads, and among them are also the memories and emotions of those who were previous reincarnations of Noah.

Allen: I had the memories of Suman, who became a Fallen One, flow into my head once. Back then, I felt like I’m going to lose my very self. My head felt like it was breaking apart, and I was really scared. Though you’re all Noah anyway, you guys really are something, living carefree even with memories and feelings of countless other people within you.

Wisely: We’re not carefree, boy. In the past there were also Noah whose selves were devoured by the memories and were destroyed. In order to keep that from happening, usually most Noah unconsciously suppress those memories. By doing so, we can shut out the memories of the previous incarnations. However, if Noahs are injured by Innocence, they might not be able to suppress it anymore, and those memories would come flooding back. We Noah also have it tough as well.

Allen: Now that you mention it, the Noah really do seem to become more violent the more we attack them.

Wisely: The profound hatred towards Innocence within the memories is what makes us so. That’s why we’d like you to be gentle with us ♡.

Allen: That tendency to joke about is just what drives me up the wall.

Lavi: Is it true that even among Noahs, the Millennium Earl is the only one who lives for several thousands of years?

Wisely: Correct.

Bak: Do all humans have the possibility of awakening as a Noah?

Wisely: They do.

Marie: And that awakening cannot be prevented?

Wisely: No. Furthermore, once they learn of Noah’s mission, they would accept it with their own free will.

Link: And what is Noah’s mission?

Wisely: Oh dear. That’s a secret~♫

Link: Tch.

Question 18: Looks like Allen’s hobby is saving up money. Was he doing other part-time jobs apart from helping out at the cafeteria as well?

Lavi: Nah, mostly it was just the cafeteria right? ‘Coz you got to sneak some bites.

Allen: It was the best part-time job on earth. At the Order, looks like it’s just the stint at the cafeteria and helping out the Science Division. Actually I’d wanted to earn a bit more, but what with rewriting reports, studying and trainingーeven on holidays I’m still quite busy.

Link: What’s with that disgruntled look? Fulfilling your duties as an Exorcist is just natural. Besides, you’re being paid to be one anyway, aren’t you?

Allen: But that’s totally not enough at all!

Wisely: Can’t be helped, with that much debt on your tab.

Bak: Such hardship at such a young age, Walker. Unimaginable to me, though, well-bred as I am.

Allen: If your heart pains for me, then please donate. (whips out donation box).

Marie: “At the Order”, you said. You mean you’ve worked elsewhere before?

Allen: Back when I was still training, I worked with Master as guards for caravans. Functions as battle training, too. It was a rough job, but the pay really was wonderful. To top that, we also got free meals, and debt collectors didn’t pursue us into deserts, too.

Lavi: You really seem to be able to survive anywhere, huh.

Link: Caravans...? So that’s how you’ve been mingling in and lying low. No wonder we hadn’t been able to track down General Cross.

Question 19: What became of Kanda’s underpants that Lavi hid back in the Weekend Schedule?

(T/N: From Gray Log. Argh dammit haven’t got round to translating Lavi’s)

Marie: Oi! Lavi! You really are such a pain!

Lavi: Ack! Sorry! But Yu’s always so calm and cool, you see. Makes me wanna see him freaking out for once.

Bak: You must really have balls to try that out.

Link: So uncivilized... (T/N: I feel like I’m quoting Obi-Wan a lot...)

Allen: So? Did Kanda freak out?

Wisely: You seem to be enjoying this, boy.

Lavi: Naaaaah～Actually, he just got dressed like nothing happened then went out to the forest for night practice.

Allen: ーwith NO UNDERPANTS ON!?

Marie: Well, it’s not totally unexpected...or rather...Kanda probably won’t get worked up over such things?

Wisely: I see...It’s the same with Tikky too. Is it just that gorgeous men do not need underpants to be gorgeous men?

Allen: I have completely no idea what you’re talking about here.

Lavi: To top that, looks like Yu just slept in the forest like that with no underpants on, too. It really wasn’t worth the trouble hiding his pants. Ah, bummer.

Marie: It's not just ah bummer, is it!? Give Kanda back his pants!

Lavi: Whaaaaat!? Even if I did return it to him, the way things are Yu wouldn’t remember it anyway. He’d probably just say something like “Huh? What’s this about?” then just stalk off! And I’d be left looking like a dork who bombed a pant-stealing prank! It’s embarrassing!

Marie: You got it backwards. What’s embarrassing here is the fact that you hid someone’s underpants, good grief (weary face).

Allen: Marie, you have to be more seriously angry, otherwise you’ll never get through to Lavi. Gotta look more strict.

Lavi: Youーyou traitor! You were all grins back there when you heard how I hid Yu’s pants, weren’t you, Allen!?

Allen: Was I? Of course not. Unlike you, I’m not a little kid.

Lavi: Ha! You’re one to talk! Whenever you do part-time at the cafeteria, you’re always stealing bites out of Yu’s food before you serve it to him. Think I didn’t know!?

Allen: That’s because Kanda’s always mocking my hospitality skills. Befitting punishment, I say! It’s not like you’re any better, Lavi. I know you’re always stuffing Kanda’s bag full of porn whenever he goes on a mission. And then there’s the time you tampered with Kanda’s toothpasteー

Lavi: You were with me that time, weren’t you!?

Bak: There’s more?

Wisely: A-ho-ho-ho (laughing). Somehow I feel like we can be good friends, boys.

Marie: Would you guys stop it already? Look, I’m grateful that you boys care about Kanda, since you guys are around the same age, but tone down the pranks! He’s still not used to these things.

Allen, Lavi: Aw, come on~!

Link: We shall not let our precious word count be depleted further by such a nonsensical topic. This conversation ends here!!

>> Part 4 <<

#dgm #d gray man #dgm vol 26

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prettywordsyouleft · 6 years ago

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The Sex Contract - Chapter 25 [Final]

Genre: friends to lovers au / friends with benefits / mature content / romance / angst

Characters: Shim Changmin x Kaia Ashton (OC)

A/N: Due to the overwhelming request I have followed your encouragement to bring back one of my older stories. This was back in a time where OCs were everything and writing one chapter in each main’s point of view was the trend. I hope that even though I have edited this drastically, that you can appreciate this story comes from my older style of writing. I definitely still read this often and find it enjoyable so I hope you will too.

Prologue | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 - FINAL

Thank you to everyone who has been reading along with this story. I’ve grown so much as a writer from this story, but I’m glad so many were still able to appreciate it along with me! It’s been a very cliche and dramatic journey, but a fun one all the same! Xxx

Chapter 25 – Changmin’s POV.

“No way!”

“Come on Changmin, it makes sense to!”

He shook his head, reaching out for the pen within Kaia’s hand and taking it from her. “No way are we doing this!”

“Why not? It worked in the past.” She pouted for a moment and then grinned, darting under his arm and racing over to her desk. Changmin chased after the British woman, trying to grab the new pen within her grasp.

“And how well did it work out for us huh?”

Kaia smiled. “Look at us now, we’re together, doesn’t that mean something?”

“It means we got lucky this time around.” Changmin eyed the pen and tried to get it again. “Besides for a while there we were both miserable because of the contract. Why on earth should we create another?”

“We were miserable because we both fell in love and didn’t confront the issue, not because of the contract itself,” Kaia corrected pointedly and dashed back to the pad of paper on the kitchen bench. Changmin followed her, resigning to her point momentarily.

“Fair call, but it caused a huge mess. I’m not going to sign another contract with you.”

“Not even in marriage?”

Changmin’s eyes nearly fell out of his head. “That’s a bit of a leap forward. We’ve been dating two months, not two years, Kai.”

“So in two years I should expect a proposal?” she teased and Changmin shook his head rapidly, her infectious laughter filling the room. “Teasing you is just too easy these days! And everyone calls you the witty, sarcastic one!”

“Guess I’ve met my match then,” Changmin stated, moving closer to the caramel haired woman and yanking the pad away. “Let’s allow our relationship to just travel its own course yeah?”

“You were the one so keen for a contract last time. Besides, I’m not just dating any guy but Shim Changmin of TVXQ. Give me back that pad!” She yanked it from his hand and began writing furiously, intriguing Changmin.

He leaned over her shoulder and gaped. “No spending time with female celebrities? How is that fair? It’s part of my job to be around them!”

“Should I remind you of Kaori Kimura or have you forgotten her?”

“Kaia, that was one incident and she and I have no connection anymore!”

“Fine, no accepting fake relationships for the purpose of career opportunities then!” she corrected the first stipulation on the paper and Changmin decided to add his own, smiling as he wrote it down. “I’m not allowed to hang out with male celebrities? I still have my part-time job at SME Min; surely I’m allowed to have interaction with them.”

Changmin shook his head. “Strictly teacher-student only.”

“Fine, but there are other men out there other than SM idols.” Changmin groaned at her confidence and took the word celebrity away from her clause. Kaia rolled her eyes.

They continued to add more and more ridiculous stipulations onto the piece of paper, all outdoing the previous one. Eventually, they were laughing too hard to continue, Kaia resting against him as she tried to settle her laughter. Changmin pulled her into his arms, lifting her up onto the bench so they were closer in height. She smiled, leaning down to capture his lips and Changmin savoured the taste of her, knowing he would never get sick of kissing his girlfriend. Even though it was early days into their actual official relationship, they already were too accustomed with each other to have issues that would make him think this was going to be a short term arrangement. He needed no contract to tell him to avoid the other female species in the world. As cheesy as he had become, the only woman that Changmin was interested in was already in his arms. Though he decided there was no harm in keeping Han Ye Seul as a fantasy interest.

Kaia moved away from him and turned back to the paper, ripping the top sheet off and then picked up the pen again. She began to intently write once more and for a few minutes, Changmin waited to see what she had put down. Handing it to him and hopping off the bench, Kaia waited for his response.

“To always be honest, to talk out our issues, to not get jealous of the people within our lives, to continue doing everything we did as friends, to enjoy the physical elements of our relationship, to always love each other and eventually get married and start a family.” Changmin looked up from the list at the expectant woman. He smiled. “Is this our new contract?”

Kaia nodded. “If you can handle it.”

Changmin placed the pad back on the bench and shook his head. “You forgot something.”

“I did?”

“Yup, but don’t worry I’ll add it on.” He then scribbled it down, stepping aside so Kaia could see.

“To tell the world we’re dating?” Kaia blinked a couple of times. “I thought we decided to keep it a secret for now, because of my new job at Vogue Magazine. People might see my position gained as a result of being with you.”

“That was won on your own hard merit working at Korea Star. Minah was right to get you writing under your real name, it opened the doors into real editorials for you.”

Kaia nodded weakly. “Do, do you really think we should do it?”

“Well, it’s not like I’ve ever proclaimed to my fans that I want them to love me forever.” Changmin grinned. “In fact, you’ve always pointed out to me that I need to treat my fans better, how better than telling them the truth?”

“You still don’t get what I mean by that!”

“Don’t you want to be like Abby?” Changmin asked, and Kaia’s eyes flashed in recognition. “She was dating Junsu for six months and now it’s out. Do you want to wait until then? That’s another four months of trying to schedule things in private places and not get caught in the same car. People have been following me more since Kaori too.”

“You bring up Junsu so easily,” she observed and Changmin smiled. “It is tempting to get it out in the open I guess. Your management will have a field day though.”

“Manager hyung will smooth it over, he has a thing for you, remember?”

“Speaking of SM, I need to get to the office for class.” Kaia stepped away but Changmin grabbed her wrist. “What?”

“We haven’t signed and dated it yet.”

Kaia laughed. “I thought you didn’t want another contract?”

“I like this one. It’ll be easy to keep to.”

“We thought the last one was too in the beginning.” Kaia laughed and signed it all the same. Changmin took the pen and scrawled his signature, chuckling as Kaia slapped his arm. “Not again Changmin! I told you last time to stop signing it like an autograph! Now we won’t have enough room for additional clauses!”

“I don’t plan on making any more,” Changmin told her and kissed her forehead. “Come on, I’ll take you into work.”

“You’re not wasting any time with the last stipulation,” she replied and they headed out to his car, driving to the SME building in comfortable silence. They continued together to the classroom, Changmin’s eyes darting towards a door on the opposite wall. A smile grew on his lips and he yanked Kaia back to it, pushing her inside before locking the door behind them.

“Really Min?”

Changmin pressed her up against the wall and kissed her briefly. “Maybe we could try and keep it on the low a little longer.”

“You like this room a little too much,” she mentioned, though her hands were already unbuttoning his shirt. Changmin grinned before kissing her again; feeling excitement in the room where everything had truly begun. If he had read all the signs back then, Changmin would have realised he was already falling in love with Kaia the first time they had sex in here. It was funny just how blind he had been to everything back then. With his newfound clarity on everything, Changmin was certain that whether they kept their relationship under wraps for much longer or not, this room would always be one of creating memories.

Strangely enough, Changmin was also anticipating meeting all the clauses of the new contract with Kaia. It held its own challenges, but he was certain keeping to it would be easier than other aspects in his life. He liked that he now had a different future ahead of him to share with the woman he wanted to protect.

He wasn’t just Shim Changmin, one half of TVXQ anymore. He was a man in love with the best type of woman - his best friend.

The End.

_________________

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raywritesthings · 6 years ago

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Dear Friend, 7/?

My Writing Fandom: Arrow Characters: Laurel Lance, Oliver Queen, John Diggle, Felicity Smoak Pairing: Laurel Lance/Oliver Queen Summary: When Felicity decides to get serious about Ray, she knows it won’t be a good idea for Oliver to be hanging around. So she turns to the world of online dating to keep him distracted. Unknown to the both of them, over the summer Joanna had set Laurel up with an online dating account in the hopes that her friend could move on from past failed relationships. There’s only one way this can end. *Can also be read on my AO3*

She was elbow deep in a file with a couple of clerks when her phone started ringing late one morning. Knowing she’d lose whatever detail she was trying to find if she broke off now, Laurel nodded to her cell on the desk and met one of the clerk’s eyes.

“Can you get that?”

Abby nodded and picked it up. “ADA Lance’s phone, can I take a message.” There was a pause, then Abby covered the phone with one hand. “Um, there’s a man asking if you can meet him for lunch.”

Laurel looked up. “What?” She stepped around the desk and took the phone, glancing at the caller ID.

Oh.

“Seriously, Ollie?”

“You did say any time between 11:30 and 2:00.” The slight teasing tone left his voice as he asked, “Does today not work for you?”

She had half a mind to give him an irritated yes, but she paused. This was the first time Oliver had even tried to take her up on her offer. Had something happened?

“No, I can make it.” She looked over her shoulder at the clerks and the pile of work on her desk. “Just, maybe give me thirty minutes.”

“I’ll be there in an hour,” Oliver promised, and he hung up before she could reply.

Laurel shook her head and returned to her work, not even leaving room for her assistants to ask any questions.

True to his word, Oliver was rapping on her door frame just after noon. She grabbed her purse and walked with him out of City Hall.

“Your pick,” Oliver said. “You’d know better than me what’s good around here.”

So they really were just getting lunch. Laurel led them along to a sandwich and soup place, trying to gauge his mood. Oliver had been odd ever since his and John’s trip to Nanda Parbat, but nothing about this seeming good mood rang false.

She couldn’t resist asking as they sat down with their food, “So what brought this on?”

“Does something have to have brought this on?”

She gave him a look.

Oliver shook his head but was smiling just a little. “A lot’s been going on. With the League, the team. I guess I realized maybe I could use a little normal.”

“Okay.” She started to unwrap her sandwich, and he did the same.

“What were you working on when I called?”

“Building a case. You know, the usual.”

“Right. How’s your dad? I’ve been trying to stay out of his way.”

“Yeah.” She didn’t blame him. Even if she had told her father the Arrow wasn’t at fault, he was still likely to lash out if provoked. “He’s drinking again. Angry. Feels like old times.”

“I’m sorry.”

Laurel lifted her eyes from her plate. “There’s no point in saying it, Ollie. We’ve both made our positions on Malcolm clear.”

He nodded. “I wish there was some other way.”

“You do?” It was the first he’d said so.

“I miss seeing you happy.”

She had trouble finding her voice for a moment. “Well, I’m not — I’m better than I have been. Going out there with you guys helps.”

Oliver nodded.

“What about you?” Laurel risked glancing up at him while keeping her face tilted down. “Are you happy?”

“Trying to be.”

“What’s stopping you?”

“A lot. Me, mostly.” Oliver sighed. “Maybe it is possible to have a life along with the work that we do, but so far I have not been able to find that balance the way the rest of you have.”

“Well, hold the applause, because I’m not sure I’m the best example of someone who has it all,” she remarked. “What do you feel like is missing from your life? A job, a social sphere?”

“A little bit. Connection. A relationship, I guess,” was his final answer, causing her heart to sink despite herself. “The trouble is those never work out for me. And at this point, I’m not sure it’s what I deserve.”

Laurel sighed. Ever since he had first come home to Starling, it seemed Oliver was in constant conflict with himself over what he could or couldn’t have. That back-and-forth had burned her more than once. The least she could do was help spare the next woman. “As much as things have gone wrong at times, as mad as you can make me — you always have the best intentions. I don’t think that anyone who is genuinely trying to do good for others deserves anything less than happiness. Even if it’s not today.”

He looked at her, lips forming the slightest potential of a smile. “You really believe that?”

“I have to. You’re not the only person who’s made mistakes, you know.”

He shook his head. “I think if we get into comparisons, it’s gonna become obvious pretty fast which of us deserves that happiness.”

“Good thing it’s not a zero sum game, then,” she replied. Then she took up her food again, keeping her eyes on it as she spoke. “So stop stopping yourself, would be my advice. If you want to start a relationship, then you should go for it.”

“Really?”

She nodded. “The worst thing is to have to wonder what might have been. Trust me.” Laurel hoped her smile met muster, but it was an effort to keep up.

“Okay. Thanks, I needed to hear that.” Oliver settled back in his seat as he also returned to his food.

They talked about this and that for the rest of the meal, never straying into anything that serious. He even walked her back to her office. It was the nicest lunch she’d had in a while.

Oliver could be really sweet when he wanted to; he’d make someone else very happy.

If there was any consolation, it was that all this talk seemed to be purely in the theoretical. After all, Oliver wasn’t currently spending time around many single woman. She’d have some time to prepare herself for that inevitably.

—-

John was certain in his decision to marry Lyla. That didn’t mean he liked all the decisions that came with a marriage, or rather a wedding.

Things had been much simpler in Afghanistan. No questions of table centerpieces or who sat where, what their colors were going to be. He’d jokingly suggested camo and gotten a roll of the eyes out of Lyla for that. About the only worthwhile part of the planning was when they had decided what part little Sara was going to play in all of it. A part of him was glad she was here ahead of the wedding; it was their love for her and each other that had him going through with this.

But he was going to tear out the little hair he had if they didn’t get this guest list situation sorted out soon.

Felicity had flipped back and forth on whether she wanted to bring Palmer, knowing John didn’t completely approve of the situation. Then Thea had dropped her plus one. A couple of the guests on Lyla’s side had had to cancel last minute due to unexpected assignments. But he thought they had the whole thing settled now.

It was the last possible person he could have ever expected to throw a final monkey wrench into the whole thing.

That afternoon he made it down to the base ahead of everyone else. Everyone else, that was, except Oliver. His friend was going through his usual workout, but rather than at least finish the set he was on, Oliver stopped as soon as he noticed John enter the room.

“Hey.”

“Hey. Something up?”

Oliver nodded rather than answer. He took a long pull of the water bottle he’d set aside, and John couldn’t help noticing the fingers of his free hand twitching at his side. Nervous energy.

Oliver wiped the back of his hand over his mouth and said, “John, I need a favor. And it’s about the wedding.”

John shook his head. “Look man, there’s nothing you need to worry about. You’re good with speeches, and there just isn’t a better choice. You’re my brother.”

“Thank you. I appreciate that, really.” Some of Oliver’s tension had dissipated, but not entirely. “I was wondering if it’s too late to ask for a plus one.”

John stared. “You’re bringing a date?”

“Hopefully.” Oliver licked his lips. “I still have to ask her.”

“But you haven’t been dating anyone.” When would he have even had time?

“It’s sort of a long story.”

John crossed his arms. “Alright, when did you meet this girl?”

“This past fall.”

“But Felicity—”

“It wasn’t until after we tried — she should be okay with it. She’s got Ray.”

He had to raise an eyebrow at that. It was Ray now?

“And this woman knows you were in love with Felicity.”

“She knows I was trying to get over someone. But it was one failed date, John,” Oliver reminded him.

“And how many dates have you been on with this new woman?”

His friend looked like he only just held back from rolling his eyes. “Look, I know it’s sudden. And you have every right to say no. This is your wedding, and I don’t want to bring someone into it that’s going to complicate things for you or Lyla,” said Oliver. “But I have given a lot of thought to this, about whether this is a step I want to take with her, and I think I do. I think I want to introduce her to the other people in my life.”

He didn’t know what to think. Yes, Oliver had been rather quiet on the whole Felicity front for a while, but he’d thought that had been his friend’s typical coping mechanism of repression. How could he have missed this?

“You’re really moving on?”

“Yeah.” Oliver didn’t sound sad or wistful. In fact, there was the smallest smile on his face. “Yeah, I think I am.”

John sighed. “Alright. Yeah, we got room for one more.”

Oliver’s smile made it actually seem worth it. “Thank you, John.”

“Anything I should know about her?”

“Well, she’s funny, but sort of with an edge to it? Tough, but really just kind underneath it all. She is a really good listener. I mean, I know I only started talking to her about four months ago, but it feels like we’ve been friends for years.” His voice had grown softer and his smile, though still present, shy. He really liked this girl.

John pushed the misgivings he might have had to the side and reached out to squeeze his friend’s shoulder. “I’m happy for you, man.”

Could he really begrudge him for trying to move on when Felicity was doing likewise? Though that did make him wonder just what Felicity would have to say about all this.

Oliver left to grab a bite to eat — was he meeting this new woman? — and within half an hour Felicity arrived at the base.

It would only be fair to warn her, right? He didn’t really want some blow up at his wedding.

So he approached her station at the computers. “Did you know Oliver was dating?”

“What?” Felicity looked totally shocked for a moment, until suddenly her confused expression cleared up. “Oh! Yeah, I set him up with an online account. Didn’t really think he’d tell you about that.”

John frowned. “He didn’t.”

Felicity frowned in an almost perfect echo. “What do you mean?”

“I mean he didn’t mention the online bit. Just asked me for a plus one to the wedding.”

“Woah, something actually happened?”

“Guess so.” Now the misgivings were back in full force. Oliver thought he was serious about some online chick? Did he even know if she was real?

“Well, who is she? What’s she like?”

He thought of what Oliver had said and shook his head. Anybody could pretend to be witty and charming online. “I have no idea. He didn’t even tell me her name.”

“He must be really serious about her if he’s meeting her in-person and everything,” Felicity said, her eyes downcast.

“I’m sorry, Felicity.”

She blinked and looked up at him again. “Why would you be sorry? This is exactly what I wanted.”

“But you — I mean, why set him up with someone else?”

“Because I have watched other women try to get over Oliver Queen. And that is impossible to do when he is single. Helena went crazy, McKenna has never come back to the city. I mean, Laurel hasn’t dated for almost two years because of how things turned out with him and Tommy! I do not need that kind of emotional scarring.” She took a breath, and her tone grew more subdued. “And I guess I made the right call, if he really could get over me by talking to some online woman.”

“I’ll tell him not to invite her,” John decided.

“Well, you already gave him the plus one,” Felicity reminded him. “And if you take it back now he’s going to think I had some problem with it, which I don’t. I’m happy with where things are between me and Ray. The last thing I need is an Oliver swinging in at the eleventh hour.”

“If you’re sure.” A thought occurred to him. “You don’t think you could use his phone, trace this girl’s signal back to the source?”

Felicity was already shaking her head. “Oh no, I am not getting involved.”

“But it could be anybody on the other end. He could be setting himself up to get real hurt.”

“Well, that’s a risk he’s going to have to take if he wants to meet her. But I don’t even want to know how angry he’d get if he found out I hacked his phone. You couldn’t even pay me. Not that any of you ever have,” she added in an undertone as she swiveled her chair so her back faced him. A pretty good indicator that the conversation was over.

John sighed and backed off. He could only hope they weren’t all making a huge mistake, and that Oliver was right that he really did know this girl.

#lauriver #laurel x oliver #laurel lance #oliver queen #arrow #john diggle #felicity smoak #green arrow #black canary #my writing

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overcastgames · 6 years ago

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Kingdom Hearts 3: SEVENTEEN YEARS!

I don’t even know where to begin with Kingdom Hearts 3. I have grown with this series, I have lived this series for so long, and when the wait for an end was finally over, I can’t help but wonder if it was worth it all.

normally the best place to start is the beginning, but honestly, I had problems with the game before it even started. Dearly Beloved has been around since the start of the series. It is the staple start-up menu theme, and even though it is a rather simple melody, it is one of the finest pieces of music to grace an opening screen. With each game, the melody has grown more complex, with accompanying instruments, and added melodies, but the core has always been there. KH3 immediately throws this tradition away, as the core melody for Dearly Beloved is lost in a mess of other instruments. I am truly disappointed by this. The song that plays is still a good song, but it isn’t Dearly Beloved anymore.

Continuing with the music theme, you don’t get very far in the game before you hit the next jarring piece of music. “Face My Fears” is the opening theme of KH3, and it is surprisingly good considering that it was made by Hikaru Utada, the main vocalist for all other Kingdom Hearts themes, and Skrillex, who generally makes a specific type of music that I don’t like. Through some restraint though, “Face My Fears” is a really nice song, and the accompanying video, a CG masterpiece chronicling 17 years of story, is chilling. The power of this combination can’t be understated

It’s hard to talk about the story of KH3 because the game is still so fresh. But it follows the paths of its predecessors by mixing Disney worlds into a Square Enix branded JRPG, a combination that shouldn’t work, but has stood tall over the years. Each world visited in KH3 is unique save for 3 of them, though of those 3 one scoots by on a technicality thanks to a clever troll move at the beginning of the game. Some worlds are retellings of more modern Disney movies, with Sora just kind of being there. Others, seem to take place after the movies that they are based on. If you are a Disney fan, it might be nice to see some characters doing things after their respective movies. It’s after these Disney worlds wrap themselves up that the meat of the plot relevant story bits begin to shine through.

This is also where things get spoiler heavy, so I will try to move about this as elegantly as possible. If you like the characters of previous Kingdom Hearts games, there is bound to be something in this that will make you happy. The endgame is packed with story threads from previous games wrapping themselves up in a way that feels nice. I just wish there was more of it. Honestly this is where things begin to fall apart for me. Because this is all endgame stuff, the content here can feel like its moving too fast, and it can leave you wishing there was more time to fit things in, because not only are we wrapping up the plot threads of a seventeen year long story arc, but we are also wrapping up the plot threads of 10 games worth of original characters. It is a lot to sift through, and there really isn’t enough time to do it all. The game even says this itself as if poking fun at itself for just glossing over plot points. I won’t make too big a deal over how convoluted everything is, because calling Kingdom Hearts confusing is like saying the grass is green.

Also, the game is super short, my clear time was sitting at about 40 hours, but other people have reported right around 30. Mine might also be inflated due to leaving the game running, and also having to backtrack to find the important collectable in the game. It may seem like this is a big game, but honestly, Trails of Cold Steel 2 clocked in at around 60 hours for me, and Persona 5, which doesn’t hold anywhere near the same amount of cultural importance was 105. It may just be me, but it just didn’t feel like enough.

Combat wise, it’s what I’ve come to expect from Kingdom Hearts. Fast paced, stylized, Action RPG content is what the series does best, and it is no slouch in this regard. That being said, some of the additions to the combat mechanics don’t sit very well with me. One of the nice things added is the ability to equip up to 3 keyblades and switch between them on the fly, and each keyblade can be upgraded to ensure it remains viable throughout the game. Performing consecutive combos triggers a formchange, which transforms your keyblade, and give you a new move set to go along with it. Each keyblade has one to two different formchanges that make it unique. This formchange system is fun ad interesting, but it comes with the added burden of non-skippable transformation animations, which trigger frequently enough to make the flow of combat feel very stop and start. There are also team attacks that trigger randomly which can also halt combat with more animations. Finally, there are the attraction attacks, which trigger when you hit an indicated enemy in battle, these attacks are powerful, but they happen far too often, and while you can skip the trigger animations, they still manage to get in the way all the time, and they take you completely out of the combat. I found myself forcing these to stop almost every time I used them. Also, they have their own music, so each time these attacks happen, they cut into whatever battle music was already playing, and that can be jarring. There’s also summons which are even more animations that halt combat, but I never used them, so I can’t really complain about them.

Complaints aside though, the combat when it was flowing properly, felt satisfying, and the formchanges were fun ways to make each keyblade feel unique as opposed to past games where each new keyblade was just a stat buff. My personal favorite keyblades were the Wheel of Fate from The Pirates of the Caribbean world, and the Frozen Keyblade, because I am an ice hoe.

The last thing I want to mention is the ending, without specifics of course. The short version is that I really didn’t like it. Tetsuya Nomura had an opportunity to wrap up the final bits of the story that we’ve been following for 17 years, and he threw it away. The game is left with an ambiguous ending to leave the door open for sequels, because of course it was, and that leaves an extremely bad taste in my mouth. I firmly believe that a good ending is important to a good story, and the if the ending doesn’t leave me feeling satisfied, then what even was the point. This is the same problem I had with Danganronpa V3. We’ve fought this series tooth and nail to get some semblance of closure from its confusing as heck plot, and it really feels like it wasn’t worth it in the end. That is the most important feeling that Kh3 has left me with, a sense of disappointment. I never expected this game to be the be all end all of RPG’s because that would be ridiculous, but I didn’t expect it to disappoint me, and right now, as I finish writing this, that’s all I feel is disappointment, with a twinge of anger. If I did any kind of grading scale I feel like I would give KH3 a 5/10, because there are far too many things holding it down.

If you want to play Kingdom Heart 3, you can buy it on PlayStation 4, and Xbox One.

#Review #kingdom hearts #PlayStation 4 #xbox one #Kingdom hearts 3 #Video Game #Console #JRPG #Action #Square Enix #Disney

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picsofshiro · 7 years ago

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i wanna start shipping Shieth but i cant bring myself to because i still see them in a very familiar, Space Dad-Space Son dynamic but thyere so pretty together and i hate it??

-puts a hand on your shoulder-

It’s okay to ship sheith, but lemme be real with you, I do not nor have I ever seen the space dad/space son dynamic personally. And in my experience of parents, I’ve had a lot of shitty dads and one (1) good dad that my mother is currently in a happy relationship with and they got a 10 year age gap and are a powerful couple of people that work to fight oppression as a white man and a Mexican woman. I’m gonna be cordial with you cause you don’t need to be afraid to ship it, its a perfectly valid ship and my response is more to welcome you into it than anything else. I’ll put this under the cut cause it’s gonna get a bit long, with a few tangents that I hope address your fears and overall point.

Let’s take off this “space dad/space son” lens for a sec. Contrary to popular and 100% incorrect belief, Shiro and Keith are not related in any way, shape or form. Voltron has a overarching theme of found family. Allura lost hers to Zarkon and found hers in Team Voltron. Hunk was scared but found family in Team Voltron. Lance has been homesick but has appreciated and grown from working with Team Voltron. Even though Pidge was hunting for her brother and father, she has found both but is still willing to work with Team Voltron for the sake of the universe. Keith never would have believed in his wildest dreams of the universe being as big as it is — the opportunity to see his mom and spend 2 years with her to bond and share stories on a space whale and talk to her about how much his best friend means to him and balancing that love for him, his sense of justice, his drive and focus to get a mission done and his mother is an example of being able to love in that way. Shiro we canonically know did not adopt Keith — he vouched for him, taught him a lot of what he knows along with whatever the Garrison has ever taught him before Shiro went off to Kerberos and his “death” announced. I don’t know what will help you see this dynamic as friends to start because that’s what I see and it what convinced me to ship it because it has so much room for potential with canon interpretation to back it.

When I was young and my mom was often in and out of my life due to work, working late on court cases, hardly time to speak to us aside from making dinner and then shooing my sister and I to our bedroom to mind ourselves, I’ve always appreciated older figures in my life, whether it was fellow students or student teachers/paras. It’s what guided me to hanging out with kids myself because I wanted to be there for someone who might not have had anyone themselves so I made a lot of friends that were not exactly in my age range, teach kids and then crush on the older ones that acted like they had their shit together but as I grew older I saw them for the flawed human beings they are and I think that’s what Keith sees in Shiro.

I’d think at one point that Keith looked up to Shiro for some reason that convinced him to get into the Garrison in the first place — that “I won’t give up on you and you shouldn’t give up on yourself” is part of that. Keith has been very protective and defensive of Shiro’s honor and image and I feel like it’s because he truly feels indebted to him in some way and makes it count through his actions. If you watch Voltron without the Space dad lens not pushed by fandom (or by marketing for that matter) and watch it for what Voltron is: you’ll see that Shiro is just slightly older than his peers, has some experience but can never actually know what’s going on and is about as clueless as everyone else is aside from his own experience as a pilot, as a fighter, and as a teammate that just wants to make sure they all make it out of this alive, his own found family that occasionally he goofs off with.

Knowing Shiro’s character, he probably had a strict/strong foundations of upbringing that included setting an example for his peers and respect for authority to a certain degree until it challenges his own morals. Mistaking his leadership around younger peers and attributing it to “parenting” would not do him justice when many adults his age and around it, even older know they probably would end up killing a child. Team Voltron is a manageable group of young adults/teens that are going to become adults and (should)own up to their own behaviors and what Keith sees in Shiro isn’t like “oh he’s like my dad” because he already had that. If he was like any other kid, he loved his father and would not accept any replacement but he’s an only child and cares a lot for Shiro so his only frame of reference for what he feels for Shiro is “brotherly”, however his behavior doesn’t match up to the way Hunk and Lance interact, how Matt and Pidge who are actual siblings interact, how Pidge and Sam Holt, her actual father interact and from what we’ve seen, how Alfor and Allura interact with parent-child relationships. Shiro and Keith have something deeper that’s still being refined and fleshed out.

I agree they look good together. Personally, I was into Keith as a character, thought I was in love with him until I saw the way he interacted with Shiro, then asked myself what he sees in Shiro and then it all made sense to me at least in my experience! That I would love Shiro the same way if he were a real person. And the way that relationship, their deep friendship is redefined in the Black Paladins with many staff emphasizing what was important, the “I love you”….

You gotta understand that maybe you need to rethink this space dad/space son thing and reframe it as brothers-in-arms(friendsheith has been a great tag to convey this), not let it be misinterpreted as adopted or literal, found family when you’re alone in a world that doesn’t quite understand you, and finally, understand that relationships change and grow, and some of the absolute best romances are made from people who’ve known each other so long that they have the potential to deal with each other and their human selves to be in a relationship and not be shocked when they don’t fit together too well and can be vulnerable and honest with each other and their faults and work past them to be stronger because of the other AND together.

Sheith is okay, they look good, but to be honest, I’ve never interacted with an older figure in my life that I haven’t felt a little gay for or had someone a little younger than me not look at me and be a little gay for me as well, and sheith has also been something that a lot of mlm have related to which is why we ship it the way we do. Don’t be afraid, it’s a valid ship and if you like, start off slow with a side blog, work your way up. My personal rule though is never stop being myself and work out any gross imperfections that legitimately harm others and make apologies for when I do hurt people directly by invading their space.

#to be honest voltron marketing is a complete clusterfuck #the only people i listen to is staff and writers excitedly making art of their fave characters and ships #if staff thought sheith was father son they would have said that but yknow - gestures at them-#they only said it's been brotherly in the sense that they're brothers in arms and mean everything to each other #so it's fine #not a pic of shiro #sheith #how do i tag this #i wanna be positive so i hope this doesn't deter you from shipping it #this ship is important to me and so many other people who play with it #it's all in fun so let yourself have fun that's what its about its for fun #anon #anonymous #ask #answered

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ohreadermine · 7 years ago

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[log:virlask] festival - 1/2

Characters: Virlask, Rael, Lukaia Note: takes place pre-baron, pre-relationship (HEH). i just wanted to write about virlask in the city, but first.. he has to get through a couple of protective hunters to do it.

Lukaia says, “You know you aren’t the first fallenfucker to try and sneak their bugtoy into the City, right? Especially during the festival. You think I’m an idiot?”

Her voice echoes through the City’s underground tunnels. Rael winces. Virlask is torn between trying to look demure and trying to restrain himself from drawing himself up. He doesn’t think Lukaia would respond well to either action anyway. The hunter herself is sitting on top of an concrete ledge, looking down at them with a haughty air. To add insult to injury, she wears a parody of an Eliksni helmet made of paper.

Virlask knows about the strange traditions of the Festival of the Lost. He thinks the paper masks are comical, but the way Lukaia wears it seems too intentional to be anything but mocking. Virlask takes a step forward. Not enough to cross any line, but to make it a point that he isn’t intimidated. And aside from the wince, Rael’s body language suggests he’s not insulted either so Virlask stays quiet. They are at the watchguard’s mercy, even if Tau had vouched for Lukaia’s character.

“Easily done in by shards, exotics, and sometimes a good fuck. But it has to be really good,” Tau says before sending Virlask off with Rael.

Lukaia hasn’t looked too carefully at Virlask. She seems more interested in giving her fellow hunter a hard time.

“He isn’t mine,” Rael says, mild. He reaches over to grab one of the horns on Virlask’s helmet, giving it a fond pull, as if to say, see? Harmless. “This is Tau’s bedbug. I’m doing him a favor.”

Virlask’s eyes narrow, head bumping against Rael’s hand. It’s humiliating, but he knows he has to play docile. There isn’t any other way into the City. At Tau’s request, Rael had agreed to take Virlask through one of the many secret hunter entrances. Per hunter code, Tau hadn’t been invited, and of course even secret tunnels need guarding.

“Tau?” Lukaia repeats. Her ridiculous Eliksni mask finally turns to Virlask, looking him up and down. She notices the design of his helmet, giving his rank away. “Little Captain,” she comments in crude Eliksni, though her voice is sweet. “Doesn’t seem like Tau’s type.”

Virlask growls. He had stopped his ether intake a few days ago to better mimic a human’s height. He is a little bigger than a vandal now, but he has been a vandal long ago so he is used to having a smaller body. “Little hunter should just get to the point. What do you want in return?”

Lukaia makes a noise, most of her bluster shot through. Virlask is familiar with her type; bored, vapid, and hungry for entertainment. He wonders what bet she lost to be put on guard duty during a week of celebration. Human, Awoken, or Eliksni — mostly all the same, when it came to opportunistic troublemakers.

“Shards,” she says, her ghost appearing at her shoulder.

Rael’s own ghost transmats a telemetry in his hand and a bright yellow engram. He tosses them up to her. “And a bonus from Tau. He says hi.”

Lukaia’s ghost collects the items before its hunter needs to catch them. Virlask can already assume Lukaia isn’t done with them yet. Tau’s additional gift had been a very optimistic gamble.

Lukaia jumps down to meet them, somersaulting as she lands. Virlask sees Rael tap his foot, unimpressed.

“That’s enough to get you through, Rael,” Lukaia says, peering up at Virlask. Her bright green eyes glow through the paper mask.

Virlask stares back. The skin of Lukaia’s exposed jawline shimmers blue. So she is an Awoken like Rael. It explains her dramatics.

Rael sighs. “I shouldn’t need to pay any toll. I knew about this tunnel years ago.”

“My watch, my rules,” Lukaia says, cheerful. She pokes Virlask’s forehead, right between his eyes. “I like your helmet. I want it.”

Virlask doesn’t budge, but he’s had enough of being played with. He picks her up, grips around her torso gentle but firm, and lets her feet dangle off the ground. “No.”

There’s a knife at his throat now. Virlask doesn’t know how Lukaia does it so fast, but he isn’t surprised. The real surprise is Rael’s knife clashing against hers to stop it from touching him.

“Kaia,” Rael warns, a starry streak of purple light glimmering along his blade’s edge. “This one’s nice.”

Lukaia’s head tilts, paper mask going askew. She scoffs, the tip of her boot connecting lightly with Virlask’s shins. “Fine. We’ll trade,” she says, withdrawing her knife and resting her arms over Virlask. The position can’t be comfortable, but she looks relaxed enough. “Your helmet for my mask.”

Virlask lowers her back to the ground. He doesn’t want to give away his helmet but he’d rather not deal with her even more. “Agreed.”

Rael huffs, stepping aside. Virlask wouldn’t call him nervous, but he’s learned Rael to be a cautious guardian. A true rarity. He pulls off his helmet, mandibles clicking in agitation.

Lukaia takes off her mask and they make the exchange. Virlask expects there to be another trick or play, but Lukaia seems to have grown bored of teasing him. Her face has a smattering of spots across her cheeks and nose, and her hair is dark red-violet in the dim light. Tau had called her pretty in a very resigned tone. But then again, Tau has a very human-centric idea of beauty.

The paper mache mask is fragile in his claws. Virlask growls, sneering at the poor design. Judging from the shape of the horns, it’s supposed to be a captain’s helmet. He puts it on, the elastic tie a surprisingly nice fit around his skull. It’s light and flimsy. He’ll need to be careful that it stays on.

“Aw,” Lukaia says, full of condescending approval. She puts on Virlask’s helmet without hesitation. “Now you’re ready for the festival.”

Her eyes do not match up with the holes of the helmet. Ridiculous. Virlask grunts, suspicious to find that he can see fine through the slits of the paper mask. He says, reluctant, “Thank you.”

“Only because it’s Tau. I’m weak to big, strong handsome men,” Lukaia laments, hand over her chest.

“You think he’s handsome?” Virlask mutters, disbelieving. “And big?” From behind, he hears Rael wheeze.

“Oh, so you are funny,” Lukaia says. She laughs. “Okay, okay. One more thing and I’ll let you two go, I swear. Let me see your hand.”

Virlask makes a point to not look back at Rael, but a part of him thinks he should have. He reaches out and stop when Lukaia shakes her head.

“Secondary, Little Captain,” she says, muffled from the heavy helmet.

Another test or another tease. Impatient, Virlask puts his left secondary hand out.

There’s a spark of arc light, piercing pain around his middle claw, and Lukaia’s deft fingers ghosting over his palm. She raises her hands before he could snatch his own arm back. When Virlask looks down, there is a gray brand around his middle claw at the skin.

“What is this?” he snaps in Eliksni. He turns to Rael, some part of him knowing the hunter could have stopped it, and it was worrying that Rael hadn’t. The band still throbs, though the initial burst of pain is gone.

“Tracker,” says Lukaia, jumping back to her high ledge. “You think I’m just going to let a Fallen captain through after a couple of shards and a shiny new helmet? The Vanguard will have my head if they found out.”

Virlask can’t find it in himself to disagree. He’s had passing thoughts about how much damage one Eliksni could do in the City, all of them theoretical. It still baffles him Tau thought it a good idea to invite him during a holiday of mourning, however celebratory it is.

“If you go anywhere you’re not supposed to go or try to take that band off, I promise there’ll be a bunch of hunters on your ass before you can blink,” Lukaia continues. “And who knows. Maybe then you’ll see just how serious Tau can be about our city.”

Virlask flexes his injured hand. The band around his claw doesn’t glow, but there a thin purple line running at the bottom. He looks to Rael, unsurprised to see the other hunter unsympathetic.

“I have no intention of harming anyone in your City. I’m only…” Virlask pauses. “I’m only here to see the festival with a friend.”

Rael chuckles, and Lukaia laughs.

“You can say you’re here for a date,” she says, shrugging. “Honestly, you might run into some of your people out there. They might be wearing masks like you, or not. So don’t get surprised. Heard we’ve got some psions in the crowd, too.” Her green eyes flicker. “Alright. Get out of here. You’ll be late for the candy toss.”

Virlask doesn’t know what to say to that. It is only when Rael nudges him along that he starts walking forward, past Lukaia’s watchful gaze. For all her taunting and careless behavior, she does seem to take her guard duties seriously. At other people’s expense.

He picks one claw beneath the tracker band, not liking the prickling itch. The band doesn’t budge. Virlask’s jaw clenches, and he tries to give the ring a little twist around his claw without taking it off. With an angry start, he realizes the band can’t be taken off, whether he wants it or not. It’s been melded into his skin, and Virlask doesn’t like the thought of a guardian using their powers to brand him.

“How do I take the tracker off after I leave?” he asks, turning around. He feels Rael’s touch at his elbow, a very light warning to behave.

“Oh. Thought it’d be obvious to you,” Lukaia says from her ledge. She holds up a hand, pressing a knife to the middle joint of her finger. She mimes a flourishing slash through the air. “If you want the tracker gone, cut it off. You guys do it all the time, right?”

Virlask feels his ruff flatten. He growls, but it’s more out of bitterness than at Lukaia. “Not anymore, Little Hunter.”

“Oh, I’ll update my reports then,” Lukaia says, laconic. She waves, voice drifting as they turn out of sight in the tunnels. “Have fun, Little Captain. Enjoy the festival.”

#oc: virlask #oc: rael #oc: lukaia #destinyfic

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