#ITS A FUCKING PICKLE. TRULY A PICKLE.

[daincrediblegg]

why the fuck do I always get stuck on Lady Terror's first conversation with Bridgens? like seriously. it's every single fucking time.

[scarycranegame]

it's so fucking funny to me how the s.miling f.riends fandom is so ridiculously, unbelievably terrified of becoming """the next ri.ck and m.orty fandom""" (whatever the fuck thats supposed to mean).. like. what the hell led these people to believe that was going to happen. this is an entirely fabricated concern. it literally does not matter

[romanarose]

I really hate doing this...

But I'm left in a financial pickle. It's been like this all year, and the depression that took me out most of last semester... Wow, that effected my finances. A lot. I've been working really hard, 2 jobs, over time... but theres just no more time in the day without sacrificing the quality of my work, and if you know the type of work I do, its important I don't fuck up.

So....

I'm trying my best, but I really need help getting things together for one more semester. Once I'm done with school this semester (all online so I can keep working 45+ hours a week) I have a few job opportunities that will make better money while making an impact in my community!! If you donate, I'll happily write you a thank you fic!!!

Everything helps, it truly does.

If you cn't donate, please consider reblogging.

If you don't wanna do either, if you are religous send pryaers to get me through this one final push!!!! I've been in and ut of school for 9 years, Im ready to have my bachelors degree so bad, and really make an impact.

[tokiwarcube]

This is gonna be so random, but can we get dethklok headcanons of how they'd react to their s/o being a ghoul/ghoulette in Ghost, please? 😶

Less random than you'd think, actually! This prompt in particular was actually written with a ghoul/ette reader in mind, although it wasn't explicitly stated. I'm actually a huge Ghost fan, myself! Bonus points to anyone who can ID me in the movie, LMAO

I do encourage reading This one for a bit more instrument/element specifics, but regardless, do enjoy!

Nathan Explosion

Despite his fame, Nathan keeps his personal life a secret from the media — or well, as best as he can as one of the most famous men in the world. So in that sense, he kind of admires the anonymity you maintain. Or at least used to maintain, anyways.

He’s gotten sucked into the metal vs. not metal debate, and before seeing you perform, he absolutely lies on the latter half of the debate. But holy shit, talk about stage presence. He’s very proud of where Dethklok stands in a concert sense — seeing Dethklok is truly, a completely unforgettable experience — but Ghost is just… Brutal.

Performance-wise, he likes Year Zero the most — the first time he saw flames erupting over the stage, bathing you in hues of orange and white absolutely took his breath away. Any song where you get to shine is a favorite of his as well.

His favorite song overall is a toss up between Year Zero and Elizabeth, though. He likes the lyrical imagery of both, and really, what metal performer doesn’t have a soft spot for an song about Elizabeth Bathory?

He gets a bit jealous if you’re a little flirty on stage, especially because he can’t just swoop in to make his place clear, but he works through it.

He’s a little obsessed with the Era V outfits — don’t be too surprised if he gets a bit handsy when the mask comes off. Or before.

He fucking hates Plushia with a passion — he is convinced that its cursed, and will not allow him in the house.

Pickles the Drummer

Pickles LOVES Ghost once you introduce him, and not just because you’re in it. The very fun, in-your-face sexuality that comes with rituals is right up his alley, and the musical niche they fall into with regards to genre is just… Listen, he loves the heavy shit, but rock will always have a place in his heart.

Impera enjoyer till the end of his days. His favorite live song is Watcher in the Sky, both for the vibes and for how crazy you’re allowed to be on stage; however, he’s also rather partial to Mary on a Cross, for obvious reasons. It’s not his favorite musically, but he does think that the bit Papa does live is funny as fuck.

Assuming you’re a ghoul with a bit of movement, he likes to hang out with security so he can hit his vape and shotgun you from below. There are MANY videos of this circulating online, and you’ve gotta admit — it’s pretty hot. Sometimes he’ll indulge the rest of the ghouls if they try to jump on the train — he’s not greedy. Also, its funny.

He likes to suggest silly little bits to incorporate into future shows — whether or not they actually get through review is another thing, but he’s got some good ideas. He doesn’t mind if you get a bit flirty on stage either — hell, he thinks it’s hot as fuck, truth be told.

He always steals mummy bucks out of the cannons before they go off. Puts it in a money clip and everything, the bastard.

He thinks the military outfit is hot as hell, but also. You do look like a bug. And he won’t hesitate to rib you about it every now and then.

Misses Cowbell Ghoul every day of his life.

Skwisgaar Skwigelf

He loves how camp Ghost is — all of the bits really make the show fun, and he loves that humor is incorporated so well. After catching enough of your Rituals, he starts bugging Nathan to incorporate some sort of spin off the “go fuck yourself” bit, and let me tell you, he’s CLOSE to getting his way.

He absolutely made fun of you when the Era V outfits got revealed… and never stopped. He loves the Era III and IV outfits so much more all around, and will never let them go. (I’m so sure that he’d like it more if he could see past the mask, but he just can’t. Quit staring at him with them big ole eyes!!!)

He still insists on tightening the bolo for you before you go on stage, though. And he secretly saves all of the gifs and videos of you on stage to watch when he misses you. So… maybe the mask does grow on him a little bit, loathe as he is to admit it.

I don’t know how to tell you this, but he 100% develops this weird, pretty one-sided rivalry with Dew. Is it because of the man beneath the mask? Is it some weird lead guitarist thing? Is it because he gets to work with you on stage, and Skwisgaar doesn’t? He’ll never tell you, but either way, he shoots some vile glares his way whenever you two interact on-stage.

There’s one particular video of Dew flashing the “you suck” sticker at him, and Skwis just glaring up a storm in response.

His favorite songs to hear live are either Mummy Dust or Cirice, and he always tries to coax you over to flirt with him a bit… and he’s usually successful He might be in the crowd at barrier, but he’s managed to cement himself as a staple of every ritual. Go figure.

(People online always complain about the giant at barrier though, please convince him to hang with security under the guise of sneaking kisses or something. People are So Sick of his tall ass, even if he does add to the show.)

Toki Wartooth

Ghost ticks so many boxes for Toki, so needless to say, he is ecstatic that you get to work with such a cool act!

His favorite album is a hard tie between Opus Eponymous and Prequelle, funnily enough. The former reminds him of his early days in metal, but he loves the overall vibes of Prequelle — very hard to choose between the two, for him.

After you introduced him to Ghost through your work, he actually delved a bit deeper, and got obsessed with Repugnant. He 100% prods you into prodding Mr. Toblerone Frog into doing more death metal stuff.

He absolutely makes bracelets to trade with fans — getting a bracelet made by Toki quickly becomes as legendary as getting a ghoul pick. Although there’s always exactly one bracelet per show that he makes with one of your spare picks that he hands out to one special person.

He has your ringtone set to If You Have Ghosts :’) He also very much loves the Ghesties bit, and there’s a nonzero chance that he’s changed your contact to be a gh- prefix of some sweet little petname he has for you.

His favorite song is easily Dance Macabre — both live and off the stage! This only doubles after the events of LA.

He saves mummy dust and confetti from every show that you do, and keeps it in his scrapbook.

He thinks the Era V outfit is really cute. You DO look like a bug… but you’re his bug :)

He has been begging for ghoul plushies since he started dating you; although, he is very happy to own a little Plushia. He thinks he’s cute.

William Murderface

Like Nathan, he has also gotten into online debates about whether or not Ghost is metal — except he takes the opposite position of Nathan. Ghost is metal as fuck to him. Listen, you don’t go on stage in front of that many people, make fun of God and everyone who worships him, and come out not being metal. Like the Satanism bit is whatever, but having the balls to go and make fun of that many people on stage? Metal.

He thought the old outfits were really boring, but he is nothing short of obsessed with Era V — for both you and Papa alike. He desperately wants a replica of Papa’s military jacket.

His favorite album overall is probably Infestissumam, but he’s also partial to Opus Eponymous. He’s been begging you to get talk Trickery Feet into getting Idolatrine on the setlist since you got him into Ghost — hell, if he ever gets the motivation to actually record Planet Piss, he’d love to do a cover of it.

Although his favorite songs to see live are probably either Mummy Dust or — after the LA show — Twenties. Twenties slides in very quick as his number one after the LA show.

He gets into arguments online about your characterization in fandom spaces, I’m sorry. He does indeed read fanfic, and he will be leaving “they would not fucking say that” comments.

He likes to banter back and forth at night about what your role would be in the clergy if you know, the whole bit was real. For someone who doesn’t give a fuck about religion, he actually puts a lot of thought into this.

[20001541]

All Character Profiles of AFO

BNHA Ultra Archives 2016 (Note: this was never translated into English officially and fan translations that had translated some of the character profiles never did afo as this was in 2016 where AFO fans were practically non-existent so no English translation ☹️)

BNHA Ultra Analysis 2019

Bonus content about the Kamino incident

Hawks Villain Report 2022 (Note: Never officially translated into English either, fan translations do exist however)

Translation below

The ringleader and guide of the villains

All for One

Quirk: All for One

Profile

Real Name: N/A

Height: 225 cm

Birthday: ???

Affiliation: League of Villains

His origins and family structure are all a mystery.

Personality: The leader of the villain faction whose hobbies, thoughts, and preferences are all surrounded by mystery. He even has the notable characteristic of enjoying criminal activities as if they were a game. He will use all that can be used--before discarding them away. Truly the embodiment of evil; the Symbol of Evil. 

-----

Countermeasures against AFO: Separate him from Shigaraki

AFO is already an extremely powerful opponent alone. There is no chance of victory if he appears together with Shigaraki. Cooperation between tops of the hero industry is the bare minimum required to battle him

Yaoyorozu: It is shameful, but I was too shook with fear and ended up unable to move during Kamino... He is not an opponent one should fight alone. 

Bakugo: Some!!! Seems to call him “Pickled Plum Head”, huh. To me, he looks like nothing but a fucking “Nutsack” though!!

-----

Stats (clockwise, from top left)

Technique: A

Power: S+

Speed: S+

Intelligence: S+

Health: C

-----

Origin The ringleader: he has linked his quirk to Shigaraki

The name of his quirk--which is also his villain name--All for One, has been planted into Shigaraki as well thanks to the Doctor. It is a world-shaking, extremely dangerous quirk. One for All, its antithesis which is held by Deku that can defeat it, becomes absolutely essential.

-----

Forced Coercion of an Innocent Boy and His Family

It has been revealed that he has forcefully coerced a highschool boy and his family to use for his plans. He surely and certainly is a fiend. By the way, the likelihood of this happening has been implied in the 2021 MHA exhibition. The picture on the left was actually part of the exhibition. An evil eye that looks at a boy. It was a hint to all the guests about the threat of the great evil. 

[natrogersfics]

PREVIEW: The Anthology (Romanogers' Version)

Artwork by @faith2nyc

Natasha’s blood hums contentedly in her veins when she nestles underneath the sheets later that night. Even so, sleep doesn’t quite manage to find her. She looks away from the shadows dancing across the ceiling and turns to the space next to her, where Steve is slumbering peacefully. One side of his face is burrowed into his pillow, but it doesn’t matter. Somehow, underneath the moonlight streaming through the liminal space between the curtains, cutting through the darkness of his bedroom, he manages to look even more beautiful. Surrendering to the urge to reach across what little distance remains between them, she lets her fingers brush away the rogue strands of hair that have fallen over his forehead. The action elicits a blissful sigh from him as he stirs ever so slightly, and she doesn’t miss the way that makes her heart feel as though it’s a little too big for her chest.

This wasn’t the plan. When their directors had suggested that they spend more time together – allow the chemistry to blossom, they had said – they hadn’t agreed to anything more than afternoon coffees in the name of movie magic. And if either of them expected anything more, it’s not as though it could lead anywhere anyway. He’s America’s sweetheart, the current darling of the industry and the face of the hottest superhero franchise. Tarnishing that image would be a crime – especially by her hands. Only those coffees had quickly turned into dinners in each other’s rentals. Which seamlessly paved the way for late night chats over bottles of wine that never quite made it into glasses. And before either of them realized, they were hooked on the taste of Bordeaux on each other’s lips. But even as reaching for each other in the middle of the night had started to become so automatic it was practically a reflex, she never thought it would turn into… well, this.

This was only supposed to be fun, a harmless outlet for the relentless pressure that came with headlining a blockbuster. Nothing more. There was never supposed to be any reverence in this. At least, not in the way Steve touched her, setting her skin alight as he got to know every single inch of it as if it were his own. Nor was it supposed to be in the way he looked at her, his blue eyes baring into hers and seeing past seemingly every façade she’s spent years carefully crafting. But it’s there, its presence as glaring as the sun on a cloudless morning that even she can’t convince herself otherwise.

Above all else, though, she was never supposed to reciprocate any of that. Not willingly, anyway. She could chalk up knowing that he can only take his coffee if it’s piping hot and that he can’t stand the taste of pickles to the many hours spent on set together, but what of the rest? She had no excuse for revealing to him, truthfully, the meaning behind the tattoos on her skin when he had asked – close to dozing off as he was. Or the vitriol that burns deep within her each time she hears the invasive questions the press directs at him, shamelessly trying to pry into what little of his life he doesn’t share with the world. Perhaps most egregious, though, is how sometimes, she catches herself wishing that here, next to him, is truly her place. That, when the sets are taken down and the shutters are placed back on all the lenses, she could still, at the end of the day, watch him dream. Which is what she’s doing now, she realizes. Fuck.

Read The Anthology here

[fawnforgold]

Okay so it took me a little time to stew on your ask game, but! I have arrived hehe :3 How about Childe and stuck in a room together?

Thank you for the delicious idea bestie. I had some pretty good fun writing this ngl hehe. I hope you like it <3

Pairing: Childe x Gn!Reader

Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI, He/Him pronouns for Childe, No pronouns for Reader, Gender Neutral Reader, Excessive Swearing, Reader is a traveler but not the traveler, Self Hatred (Reader), Implied Friends to Lovers, 780 ish words.

writing ask game <3

“It’s stuck.” Childe stated. 

“Stuck? What do you mean stuck?” You asked in a panic. 

You knew it was a bad idea to venture into The Chasm with the Harbinger, but you thought the trouble would at least wait to start until after you were in The Chasm rather than before. Unfortunately, there was nothing either of you could do about your predicament. Not until the remainder of your team caught up with the both of you. You stood there with your hands on your hips, trying your best not to let your anger get the best of you, but you were infuriated.

“Fuck, Childe how does this even happen?” You ask him, still trying to contain all the emotions you were experiencing. 

He looked around for a solution, inspecting the rocks that had happened to fall and trap the entry door in a lodged position. Sadly, none of the larger rocks would budge and the ones that did ultimately helped nothing. 

“We’ll think of something.” He reassured you, still pushing through the many rocks blocking a way out. 

“I sure hope so or else we’re fucked.” You reply. 

Usually, you would’ve suggested he use his Foul Legacy but he had already used it one too many times leading down to The Chasm, and anymore could cause you guys to be in an even bigger pickle than you were already in. You yourself weren’t as strong in the moment, either. So, it truly was a sit and wait type of situation. Although, your panic was starting to really set in, especially with the treasure hoarders that were circling the area. You just hoped the other teammates were soon to to arrive or you both really were fucked. 

“Is it budging at all?” You asked anxiously.

He stood up from his crouching position to give you a sympathetic expression. Childe shook his head as he spoke. “It’s the boulders that are really locking us in position. So, we’re stuck for now.”

“Fuck!” You yell. “I’m so fucking stupid!”

Childe’s expression fell into one of guilt and sadness. He hated seeing you like this, blaming yourself for something that couldn’t have possibly been predicted. He tried to think through everything that had happened up until the moment you both were trapped in the dingy shack. There had to be something. At the very least he could rest up until he could use his Foul Legacy to get the both of you out of here, but that still had its risks. Childe sat beside you and placed a soothing hand on your back, rubbing up and down in an effort to console you. You, who had  begun to cry due to your frustrations. 

“The rest of the team will be here soon, but till then let’s just relax and rest. We’ll be out of here before you know it.” He said quietly. A sad but hopeful smile was on his face, but as he looked at you he realized just how hopeless you truly felt. 

He knew there wasn’t much he could do in that moment other than hold you close and comfort you, whether it be as your friend or something entirely different, he promised himself he’d be there to get you through this horrible emotion you were feeling. Childe knew you two would get out of this situation with ease one way or another, it was you that he was really worried about. Unfortunately, there wasn’t much he could do other than what he was already doing, and he wondered if even that would be enough. 

“I know it doesn’t seem like it now, but I promise I’ll get us out of here. One way or another.”  His words were oddly soothing in a way, enough so that you didn’t feel the need to ask how he planned on doing such a thing. Simply put you were able to lean on him, both emotionally and physically, until help did eventually arrive. Although, in the moment it felt hopeless and anything but possible, Childe had a way of calming and reassuring you that eventually there wasn’t even a doubt in your mind that you both were going to escape the situation safe and sound. And once you did, you were able to look at him with a thankful expression on your face. Before you and your comrades went into The Chasm you made sure you really rested those limbs of yours before pushing onward, but when you did inevitably venture into The Chasm with everyone, you found yourself looking at Childe in an entirely new and fascinating way. You’d never seen him look so beautiful before. Had he always looked like this?

[irlactualhuman]

I feel like one of the hallmarks of the Estrogen truly working is that now I'm randomly finding that I've tightened the lid on stuff too tight.

Like oh! I have this homemade Buffalo sauce in a pickle jar in the fridge I made last week. Gonna fuck up some chicken nuggies -> THIS LID WAS WELDED TO THE JAR IN THE FIRES OF HELL AND NOW I MUST ENLIST A COMPANY OF EINHERJAREN TO LOOSE IT FROM ITS BONDS

[j2zara]

j2's vegas wedding outfit. porter's carrying him over the threshold of the chintzy honeymoon suite and spreading his bride out on a heart-shaped bed and making love to him ALL night.

IM SORRY I WISH I HAD MORE THOUGHTS ABT THIS BEYOND JUST FORMLESS GLEE. I was so busy living in the euphoria of j2porter vegas wedding roleplay that i forgot i lived in a world where i ought to say more than scream incoherently abt it. Sorry everyone for being soft about these two. Like its my fault. Tomorrow Jace is going to yell at j2 over this but today j2 is glowing. He's so happy and unfortunately im evil and in my heart porter has this terrible moment of in his head seeing J2 like this tacky wedding dress in his arms and all like yeah i would give it all up for j2 and then its over and hes like ok im normal now (he's not). He loves being in porter's arms he loves being carried across the threshold (secretly his favorite part) and J2 is so adoring and trusting and its just. I cry.

And i do think it would even be something that J2 would take a moment to accept, like i don't even think it would be his idea bc like he wants it he wants it to be real in that he wants porter to himself he wants to be the one picked to be It but also he wants the fantasy of it as well if he can't have that but also a part of him is like is it blasphemous is it wrong to want to indulge in the fantasy in which i get to be the one for Porter. Especially if this is not a situation in which he is invoking jace, like this is for him.

I can't decide if that once he's in on it though he's the one nervously but like excitedly trying to voice his ideas or if he's truly in for the ride. He definitely didn't decide on the dress but like unironically he loves it I think in his mind he would end up in something more dainty but its perfect. He can do tacky!!! He likes comfort, he likes tacky, he's never had a sense of style but he likes romance, repulsion at closeness is a jace instinct and it always feels alien in his brain, wrong, and J2 freaks out a bit abt the dress getting messed up at first but like the tags are right Porter is getting into it and J2 can relish the fact that Porter is not going to treat him like a precious thing, the want to the point of destruction is close to what he wants, right?

and the heels are crazy something that high might be a j3 special j2 has never worn a heel in his life and initially he's like idk abt this but if it's what porter wants then ok! And he's kinda wobbling around, but he's earnestly giving it his best shot like asking Porter "how do i look?" and like and its like endearing and awkward and so baby bird and Porter is just like so endeared by it until the heel snaps off but thats ok bc that means Porter gets to carry him some more!!

And i do think J2 gets into the roleplay aspect of it like for real for real. This entire night is about how special J2 is which he's like absolutely taking and relishing and he might actually die of happiness and b/c i love porter but i hate porter he's absolutely playing into it just this idea of like it's crazy and it's stupid but what if we went for it? i would give it all up for you. I chose you. I have to have you, which is why we're ruining the dress and the makeup. Like Porter rips the dress and he absolutely wants j2 to cry and his mascara to run and his lip gloss to smear while Porter is fucking his face and j2 is sooooo into it.

but also it gets very slow and treasures him kissing of the thighs and slowly taking off the garters and J2 might pass out. He's like. J2 is not doing the work for tonight this is for spoiling you (I earnestly think if they did commit to the whole honey moon suite thing Porter is making J2 everyone's problem. This is my special little princess for the night. Get behind me kitten he asked for no pickles). J3 makes fun of j2 for earnestly using the phrase "making love" sometimes and what they're doing usually isn't really that but tonight it is and. he cries but like for once its not like a sad cry or even a bittersweet cry.

But the other half of the roleplay beyond getting spoiled is j2 getting like wayyyy into it like. if he were really. basically living in this fantasy of essentially being Porter's housewife and being like yeah i'd do all your dishes and all your laundry and treat you right and be dressed up for you with a cute little apron and give you a kiss every day when you came home work and of course there's a home cooked meal and you can watch tv on the couch or i could give you a massage and tell you how hard you work and how happy i am to see you and whatever else you want. You're the center of my world. And then i can blow you obviously. Which obviously is huge turn on for Porter so they go at it like two more times and then the rest of the night

J2 doesn’t stop telling Porter he loves him all night. The softy in me says Porter also says it back. But you didn’t hear it from me

[threewinterssnow]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who liked or reblogged something from you! Get to know your mutuals and followers. 💛💛💛

Also I saw on one of my posts you reblogged and said you think people should vote for snoke as the hottest character and I really just wanna know why very badly. No judge I desperately want to know.

Supreme Leader Snoke is by far, the hottest character in the sequel trilogy, and one of the hottest in the entire Star Wars universe. In this essay, I will explain just why Snoke is hotter than everyone and why I desire to be balls deep in his sexy, sexy ass.

When we are first introduced to Snoke in The Force Awakens (the only canon movie of the sequel trilogy, which is a subject for a different essay), he is only a hologram, and a very mysterious one at that. He shows up as MASSIVE, but is he truly that large? Or perhaps he's only 4.5 centimeters tall. We truly had no idea in that movie, nor did we know anything about him, which only added to his aura of mystery. Knowing nothing about Snoke besides that he seemed to want Kylo and Hux to get married (why were they always standing that close together?) we really knew nothing about him, and how could such a mystery not bring about the desire to plunge your cock into his bussy?

While The Last Jedi was in many, many ways an utter disappointment and not worthy to follow TFA, the one way it was a complete success was showing off Snoke's sexiness. Now we can finally see that he really is 7 feet tall, which maybe is a let down after his massive hologram, but not bad overall. And how better to showcase just how hot Snoke is than putting him in a sexy, golden robe? What else is the viewer supposed to think about than what lies under that robe? Is he wearing matching gold underwear or does he go commando? A gold thong perhaps? Maybe even a C-3PO buttplug? The possibilities are endless, and it was a bold choice to show Snoke in such a way to make the viewer desire him in such a carnal way. How many people watched that movie and imagined Snoke slowly stripping his gold robe off, letting it slide to their bedroom floor and Snoke showing off his nude magnificence?

One of the many issues in TLJ is how right after getting the viewer hot and ready to bend Snoke over the back of his throne, they killed him off. It was truly a travesty and one of the top ten Worst Decisions made in that film (or maybe top fifty - there were many poor decisions). With that, one would think that the "final" film of the Sequel Trilogy (although it is a stretch to even call these last two films part of what The Force Awakens began) would be bereft of any sexiness since they'd killed off the hottest character of all. Yet, we were treated to what might have been Snoke's sexiest appearance of all, as brief as it was. A pickled Snoke was not something anyone expected and it raised some interesting ideas. Could you fuck multiple Snokes at once? Does Snoke taste like pickle juice, and more importantly, does his cum taste like pickle juice? If only that film had dedicated more time to answering the important questions.

Since Snoke is so hot, it's only natural to spend a significant amount of time thinking about just what lies under that robe. We know so little of Snoke, and even less about his genitals. Does he have a cock? Two cocks? Perhaps even three or more cocks! Truly, the possibilities are endless. He could have barbs or a knot or a very, very tiny penis in its flaccid state that grows to be several meters long when it is erect. His dick(s) could be a tentacle(s). Who among us has not imagined Snoke with several long tentacled dicks wrapping around their bodies as they pummel his sexy butt?

We do not even need to limit ourselves to one fun penis type with Snoke. Maybe he has 12 penises, all of vary shapes. Perhaps one is a corkscrew with barbs, one could be a long prehensile dick that Snoke uses as an extra arm, or a long, extra muscular one that functions as another leg. And we could mix and match so many different fun penis types and give them all to Snoke.

As we know so little of Snoke, there is no reason to limit ourselves to his hypothetical penis(es). Maybe he's got a vagina or three. Depending on your preferences, you could imagine him with only a vagina (or multiple vaginas) or with penises and vaginas. Which of course, could bring up the forever interesting questions of 'does Snoke fuck himself? Has Snoke ever gotten himself pregnant?' The possibilities are truly endless here.

Another possibility is that Snoke has neither penis or vagina and that instead, he has a cloaca. Perhaps Snoke mates by rubbing his cloaca against his lovers and his jizz simply comes spurting out of his singular hole, probably with poor aim.

In the situation that Snoke does have a cloaca, he would likely have his testes (or perhaps only a singular teste) inside his body. Which for some people, might be peak sexiness, although I prefer to imagine external testes on Snoke, regardless of what else is going on under that robe. I just think we should all spend more time thinking about the pair of wrinkled prunes Snoke has under there. And how he likes to offer Kylo a nice warm glass of prune juice every night. And it may be that Snoke has more than two sexy prunes under there. Why not an entire cluster of prunes, just waiting for a warm mouth to juice them?

The situations you could put Snoke in are truly endless. Whatever your sexual fantasies are, it is so easy to imagine Snoke there. Tied up, covered in your fluids, ass and mouth and possibly other holes filled with multiple cocks. Or maybe you like to imagine your holes filled with Snoke's cock(s), getting filled to the brim with his prune juice, his thick knot keeping it all in place until your belly starts to inflate with the sheer force of Snoke's thick baby batter. Truly, almost any scenario works with Snoke, which is more than you can say about any other character in the sequel trilogy.

I mean, who the fuck want's to put their cock in Poe Dameron's ass?

In conclusion, Snoke is truly one of the hottest characters in Star Wars, and anyone who says otherwise is clearly in denial. There is no shame in wanting to fuck the wrinkled old man and his dangling prunes and once you sheeple wake up, you'll all realize this, just like you'll figure out that the lizard people built the Denver International Airport and are controlling us with the laser beams emanating from Blucifer's eyes.

[feelingbloo]

doing this all at once because im fasting and need a distraction... this shit be getting personal lmao

day 1: your stats

currently 82.2lbs as of writing

day 2: how tall are you, do you like your height?

im 4'10, no not really! definitely doesnt help my bmi out at all, lmao. id prefer to be around 5'4.

day 3: a picture of your thinspiration. what features do you like about this person?

most thinspo kinda rolls off my back and doesnt affect me, so i dont really look at it. blessing and a curse.

day 4: your greatest fear about weight loss

i only have one fear, and its my partner. she (not so subtly) compares herself to me and uses me as thinspo, and i know losing weight will only make this problem worse.

day 5: why do you really want to lose weight? are you doing it for you?

im not sure if theres a real reason anymore. everything i can think of is something that occurred after the disordered eating started, so i dont know what truly drives me. id say im doing it for myself because theres nobody else i would do it for.

day 6: do you binge? if so, explain why you think you do

of course, definitely. most times its due to an emotion, i think ive always used food as a comfort in that way.

day 7: do your parents know you are trying to lose weight? do they care?

they dont, i never told them and they havent found out. i assume my mom would care, my father sorta shuts himself off so i dont know if hed be mad about it or what.

day 8: your workout routine

im physically disabled from an unknown myopathy (my body doesnt produce enough muscle) so everything is a workout to me lmao. i generally walk around for 4-ish hours a day, since i cant quite manage anything else.

day 9: did anyone ever make comments about your weight in a negative way?

no, only my eating habits. i was often told that i ate so much i mustve had a tapeworm, and most of what i eat is "junk food" due to sensory issues.

day 10: what was the hardest thing you gave up during this weight loss?

dude, i fucking miss the liquid calories! in past restriction phases i refused to count liquid cals, and i definitely still lost weight, but not as fast as i would have liked. ive started counting them and ughhhhh.

i didnt cut them out completely, so i still have creamer in my coffee and the occasional soda, but i want my milkshake goddamnit 😭

day 11: your favorite thinspo blog and why

same answer as day 3.

day 12: what do you normally eat?

for main meals i usually have tuna on toast, egg salad sandwiches, cream cheese bagels, ham sandwiches/ham bagels, grilled cheeses, basically just carb + animal product. if we order out its either a cheeseburger or fried rice.

for sides/snacks/small meals i like string cheese, pickles, mini candies, lollipops, pepperoni, if theres any sweets in the house i have some of that.

its a wonder that i even lose weight on this lmao. but OMAD and counting cals is what makes it possible.

day 13: are you losing weight in a healthy or unhealthy way?

i dont think ive ever seen someone answer this with the former option. we're all doing this unhealthily on this side of tumblr.

day 14: whats your UGW? when do you expect to reach it?

ooh, tough one. it seems like everyone has a set UGW but i dont. i feel most compelled towards the number 73lbs, which is the bmi of my LW (15.3). i dont think that bmi is low enough for me though, i'll figure out when i get there.

ive gotten close to that weight a couple times, but ultimately something always happens and i emotionally binge or whatever. no clue about timing.

day 15: are you vegan or vegetarian? if so, has this helped you lose weight? if not, would you consider turning vegan or vegetarian?

ive had lengths of time where ive been pescetarian (vegetarian + fish), it never helped me lose weight.

at this time in my life im not able to limit my diet to that degree, but i heavily support the lifestyle for ethical and environmental reasons. if i move out id likely try veganism.

day 16: when did you first decide to lose weight?

i began obsessively weighing myself at 7, and started to learn purging around 9/10. it wasnt ever something i was serious about, but at 12 i discovered the online ana community andddd... it really just brought out that part of me. so id say 12 is where it officially began, but ive had it in me since 7.

day 17: do you have an eating disorder?

never officially diagnosed but i dont think most people here are. yes, anorexia nervosa.

day 18: what food is your weakness?

i dont restrict what type of food i eat, as long as its under my limit. but my real weakness is food other people give me... i cant resist it regardless of the calories and it makes me feel so dumb. they dont even have to be in the room! it could just be takeout, they dont even have to be the one to cook it!

day 19: when is the last time you ate fast food?

i cant even remember, i almost never eat it since i dont like it. the grease and the oils coat my mouth and throat and it feels so disgusting.

taco bell cinnamon twists are bomb though.

day 20: favorite diet?

the special k diet is funny (literally just eat special k) but i always lose a lot of weight when i do cereal-based diets like that.

day 21: what are your clothing sizes?

ehhhh,,, i dont wear fitting clothes and everything is baggy, do usually womens small or sometimes xs.

my measurements are quite small (26bust, 23waist, 28hip IIRC?) so im below a 00 in most charts ive seen. unfortunately thats just my general size due to my height, im not as thin as people imagine from that by any means.

day 22: what was your lowest weight? when and how did you gain?

73lbs at 12, my height didnt change since then lmao. i experienced some trauma right after getting to that weight, which led to me binging myself back up to 90lbs.

day 23: did the media play a role in your wanting to lose weight?

i think it was more personal experiences rather than the media, however the media likely did contribute once i had already established my disordered eating.

day 24: how do you feel about the terms pro-ana/pro-mia

it depends on the context. in the original meaning, it just meant a space where you could discuss your disorder without actively working towards recovery. i support that heavily.

nowadays, where it usually means people promoting ana/mia as some pretty dainty "lifestyle", fucking ew. what is wrong with you people. i understand wanting to romanticize your disorder (and find others who do the same), but i draw the line at genuinely thinking that disordered eating makes you "better" than others, or whatever bullshit they try to say.

day 25: have you ever purged? if so, describe your first experience.

i have purged in the past, but due to my disability (day 8) i typically cant vomit anymore no matter what i try. the muscle just isnt strong enough anymore to contract that violently.

first experience was harrowing lmao, i had had a bowl of instant ramen and was hallucinating as i was purging it. everything else was so distracting, i dont really remember anything about the actual purging itself.

day 26: what excites you most about reaching your UGW?

the first time i got to my LW, i just remember feeling so giddy and proud and i want that again and again.

day 27: how do you deal with being around food?

if i eat it, im not longer around it... i just have zero self control.

day 28: do you want that gap between your legs? why?

i guess so. its something a lot of people are envious of, and i knew i was happy when i had it in the past.

day 29: your definition of beauty.

this is going to sound "wrong" from an anorexic person, but chubby people. i dont have a fetish for it, i have slept with average people without problem, but i dont think i could date someone who wasnt at least bmi 23... ive found that bmi 25-27 is the sweet spot though.

i just think theres something so attractive about it regardless of gender. like hell yeah thick arms and round stomachs and back rolls. fuck yeah.

day 30: 10 facts about you! and now, what are your stats?

oh god what is this, an interrogation? not saying stats since im doing this in one go.

i draw (hobbyist, nowhere near professional)

i collect animal bones and general knick knacks

garfield and miku are my favorite characters

i tap on everything

i wanted to be a veterinarian as a kid

favorite animals are polar bears and hammerheads

my grandmother wanted me to be named tapestry (what??)

i have dyscalculia

i enjoy making cookies

i can barely whistle

[homo-rashi]

Omovember 2024 | Marvel Cinematic Universe

𝙳𝚊𝚢 𝚃𝚑𝚛𝚎𝚎: 𝚂𝚝𝚞𝚌𝚔 𝚘𝚗 𝚊 𝙵𝚎𝚛𝚛𝚒𝚜 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚎𝚕

“Come on, Mr.Stark you didn’t go on a single ride today.” The billionaire looked down at his energetic intern, his bright and eager eyes looking back up into his honestly exhausted and annoyed ones. 

When Peter sauntered out of his room that morning with a glum expression, explaining that Mrs.Leeds has contracted food poisoning and in turn, couldn’t take Peter and Ted to the fair, Tony was quick to offer himself as a replacement. He had nothing to do that day of importance and he likes spending time with the kid. However, he didn’t truly realize what going to the fair with Peter, an enhanced kid with infinite expendable energy… 

“This is the last one, Okay underoos? After this we have to get back to the tower and get some real food for you, okay?” Tony didn’t particularly love rides, mostly because he can sense the mechanical errors from these builders from a mile away, c but, He is eager to get the hell out of this place and back to the tower with proper A.C and Plumbing. Especially the latter. 

“Okay kid, calm down. I said I’d go on the Farris wheel, not the tilt-a-whirl.” The kid was practically bouncing the trolly off its tracks with how much he was vibrating in his seat. 

“Sorry, Mr.Stark I’m just excited.” 

“Yeah, excited and hopped up on sugar. What did you eat today?” Tony is somewhat glad he got to experience an outing like this with the kid, seeing exactly how much he ate and how overpriced the shitty food was, he made a mental note early on how he needed to send the kid with a lot more pocket money the next time he did end up going out with the Leed’s family. 

“Well, I got a pickle at the lemonade  stand where you got lemonade, and then a nacho platter when you got a slushy, Oh! And the deep fried Oreo when you got milkshake and—-cotton candy when you got water.” Tony rubbed his thighs together at the reminder of exactly how much he has had to drink today. While the fair food didn’t look too safe, the drinks did and it was the only way to curb his appetite the entire day. 

“Look, Mr.Stark, we can see the tower from here!” The Ferris wheel stopped at the very top, 

“You can see the tower from every tall building in New York, ki—-“ A loud squeaky noise erupted from the base of the Farris wheel followed by a slight jerk. “Fuck.” Tony cursed under his breath, already knowing a sound like that means trouble. 

”Uh oh. Are we stuck, Mr.Stark?” Tony looked the kid up and down—-he seemed calm…Tony would be calm himself if he didn’t feel like he was holding an ocean inside of him. Both of them have been stuck in worse situations, no need to panic and ruin the semi-nice day they have both had. 

“Sounds like it, kid. I don’t think you are necessarily stuck…” Tony winks at the boy, a knowing smile spread across both their faces. “Too bad you don’t have the suit.” He jokes. 

“Too bad you don’t either, you could probably fly down there and fix this thing with your eyes closed.” Tony hummed in agreement, He could, but knowing the inside of this thing is probably a mess, it would take even him a while to work out what is what. 

Time passes slowly. An official announcement via loudspeaker plays officially telling them and everyone else on the ride of the issues and that a repair team was working on the repair…Tony looked down to see the ‘repair team’ was a singular old man with a wrench and a confused expression. A sigh slipped past his lips. 

“Are you okay, Mr.Stark?” Tony turned on his smile and looked at the kid, not wanting to let the boy know of his growing predicament. 

“I’m fine, Kid. Just want to get home.” A well placed yawn by the man seemed to be enough to turn the kids worries away. 

•───────────────── •

Peter couldn’t figure out what exactly was wrong with Mr.Stark, but he could tell something was bothering him. Periodically, his heart rate would spike. The man’s dementor would seem calm and unmoving to anyone else, but in the tight space, Peter couldn’t help but tune into the more minute changes due to his super hearing. He could hear the tensing of muscles tendons alongside the quickening heartbeat, each time getting more intense, strained. 

He might not have known the billionaire for as long as others, but he has spent a lot of time with him in the last few years and it's rare for Mr.Stark to show any hint of anxiety, especially for such mundane things. 

Aliens invading the city, yes, mild anxiety. Peter, getting himself shot, maximum anxiety, but getting stuck on a Farris wheel…very bottom of the list of things Peter would consider anxiety-inducing to literal iron man. 

He had considered Mr.Stark being afraid of rides as the reason he didn’t go on anything else all day, but, he quickly realized that was nonsense when the iron man suits and basically more insane then any ride at a fair. He deduced Mr.Stark just genuinely had little interest in the rides, or, was taking the warning for people with heart conditions to not ride a little too seriously. The man's heart withstands being thrown around in the iron man suit….It can handle the teacups. 

It took a while for Peter to really be clued in on what was plaguing him. He would love to have said it was his own sharpness and being in-tuned with the other man's emotions that helped him figure it out, but, really, it was just his enhanced scenes. 

A short, almost instantly cut off hissing noise erupted from his mentor followed by the strong, to only Peter, smell of urine…Mr.Stark needs to be, and clearly badly at that…

Now that he knows that’s the issue, he realizes he didn’t see the billionaire stop off at the port-o-John’s a single instance that day, while Peter himself had to use them multiple times due to his enhancements. But even without a fast metabolism, of course Mr.Stark is desperate. It’s been hours. 

•───────────────── •

Tony’s eyes Burt’s open at the sudden loss in control. He Hadn't even realized he was concentrating so hard on not showing how bad off he is, that he closed his eyes. He is fucking Tony Stark and he just wet his boxers…

”M-Mr.Stark?” Shit. Tony knows the second he sees that look in the boy's eyes. That guilty but not empathetic worry that the spidering just can’t seem to hide. “Are you gonna be okay? You can hold it, right?” 

”I really hope so, kid.” Tony can’t even say yes. Even not, it's getting harder and harder to hold it back. The wetness in his boxers is teasing his body to let the rest of the flood out. Pants be damned. 

“Just…Do what you need to do, okay?” Tony knows that the boy means—-he is giving him permission to hold himself to prevent an accident for as long as possible and—-He lets himself do it. 

Not in the childish way he has seen Peter so many times on car trips and during missions, between his legs, stepping from foot to foot. Tony chooses to grab his dick from the outside of his pants, on his leg and simply squeeze for dear life. Tapping his other foot commences shortly after. 

He can’t help but feel two beady spider eyes trying not to stare at him. 

“Where stuck here kid, might as well spit out whatever you want to say, we have nothing better to do” 

“I—-I don’t really have anything to say…It’s just different seeing you be the one in this kinda situation is all…” Oh. Tony has alway been in Peter’s shoes when it comes to bathroom emergencies like these in the past. The boy simply can’t manage asking to let anyone know of his need until it's urgent. Peter has pissed himself in front of him so many times, Tony stopped counting when he realized it wasn't anything medically wrong with the kid, just anxiety. He has been working with him to normalize talking about this kinda thing, and here he was trying to do the opposite.

“I’m human too, Underoo. I deemed the bathrooms at this damn fair unusable, and look at the situation I’ve ended up in” Tony feels a leak slip past his tight grip. 

“Y-You’re gonna use the portajohns when we get off this thing though, right? Because it's not really safe to hold it.” 

Tony learns forward slightly when another leak slips past, this time wetting his hand that’s trying so hard to keep everything in. It isn’t working anymore…

”Kid—-I—-“ 

“It’s okay Mr.Stark!!! Like you always say to me, It’s not good to hold it and pants can be washed and—-“

”Shit.” Tony is soaking his pants before Peter can finish his speech. “Look away.” Tony accidentally says a little to frantically, He looks up from his quickly soaking lap to ensure Peter’s eyes are off him before he reaches into his pants and pulls himself out over his waistband, tuning over in the hard plastic seat and letting his piss fall freely onto the floor. 

“Mr.Stark are you—-“ 

The sound of his piss splattering onto the trolley is deafening to even him, of course the boy would instantly realize his mentor was literally exposing himself in public but—-Tony can’t find it in his mind to care. It feels so amazing to finally be peeing. 

The feeling of hours worth of liquid sloppily splashing out of his aching dick, forcefully and loudly makes him blush at just how desperate he was, and how obvious it was. He can see a bit of the piss running towards the crack in the door, likely dripping down to the ground, and hopefully not onto any of the other trolleys below. 

Once his stream slows down, Tony takes a second to look at his pants… He soaked them. There is no denying Tony Stark wet himself. He didn’t act fast  enough. Now that he is peeing, he doesn’t know why he didn’t just do this an hour ago, the second he realized he was in a bad place. The last of his accident falls from him and he quickly tucks himself back into his pants, praying they stay stuck long enough for his suit to dry, or, until it gets dark. 

Peter witnessing is fine, but if anyone snaps a photo of him like this...

[cloggedarteri]

ive been reading the ffxv japanese translations and ive been taking notes as usual. take a peek if you'd like (this shit is not proof read, this came straight from the dome)

--ch 1:

♡the way regis speaks to noctis is so informal compared to eng...hes very close i feel

♡"Prompto: Ah, they sell Ebony here. Ignis will be happy"---prompto is so considerate bruh. its so sweet that he had an eye out for things ignis likes. it says something to have someone remember things about you....prompto has the fattest crush on ignis i can smell it

♡prompto is so cute omg: "Hooray. Just one more!" he says after their second fight with a herd 

♡dave asked for assistance in hunting down the last of the varmin in the area and there are three options: 1. do it for free. 2. do it for a price--2AP. and 3.ask my friends--150. the response for the second option is so awkward, noctis says: alright we'll do it...um the reward? AND THEN THE THIRD OPTION HAS IGNIS saying: It’s dangerous if we leave as it is. Tell us more about it......its so funny that ignis is very "he asked for no pickles on his burger" coded, speaking up for noctis

♡boys are very gun-ho/very impulsive...gladio had to hold the boys back before they attacked the infected dualhorn...very dad coded i love that for him

♡boys trying to figure out whos going to drive the car after its repairs... noctis is funny as hell. prompto said that he wasnt confident in his driving and noctis said:"im confident i will break the car again"...hes truly a passenger princess and i love it. a very self aware passanger princess

♡noctis is such a bro...he hears prompto wants to visit cindy in the future and he offers for him to borrow the regalia

♡ignis isnt saying his signature puns bruh...umbra came with the notebook and all ignis has to say is that hes a reliable messenger WHILE ENGLISH IGNIS SAYS THAT UMBRA "certainly nose how to find us" 

♡ahhh noctis is blushing when gladio puts him on the spot about wanting the marriage and prompto fucking calls it out too omg

♡gladio saying he wants to go for a dip in galdin quay makes me think of him dressing up as a mermaid for a party with the tail and pearls and everything...omg he does a little mermaid performance for iris's birthday b/c like any little girl she had a mermaid phase and he didnt want to disappoint his baby sister 😭 omg gladio i love you

♡with all the uncle ardyn fics ive read i find it really funny that during their first encounter arydn flicks the coin at the boys and says: "consider it your allowance"...arydn would be that uncle that pulls out a whole roll of 20s and 50s and 100s but then hand you a fucking dollar and say dont spend it all in one place...hes such an asshole😭

♡noctis is so cute bruh, he defo pegs me as a boy lacking in life experiences because he was all starry eyed when the zuzu flew away and said: "whoa, so magnificent", hes such a dork i fucking love him omg

♡the boys just called prompto a personality hire without substance when they were comparing him to dino

♡you know whats fucked up, everyone in the group had lost someone following the attack but we dont get a second to think about. yea noctis lost his father but the boys have all lost people, have all lost their homes...fuck gladios father died in action. ignis' uncle possibily died in action too. prompto's family situation is difficult but we can assume that his parents were lost in the casualty 

♡never noticed that this is probably the first time the boys see magitek troopers. it sounds like they know of them though (prob royal personel collected information about nifilheim tech---giving very cold war vibes ngl) gladio says: "so these are MTs

♡ end of the chapter gives us radio announcements and theres a segment talking about noctis: " He’s a calm person with a very gentle heart who loves animals and nature" --- now who the hell is telling them this. it gotta be regis wanting to gush about his boy     "And he’s also very serious, well-behaved, and always a top-scorer student." ---i had no idea he did well academically bruh. i cant help but imagine the effort it would have taken for him to be such an honor student, not only from noctis but from the boys too. how many late nights did he and the boys have to make sure he passed tests...ignis and gladio are very older siblings parenting their younger siblings coded and im so fucking sick        "On his day off, he seems to be doing community service to helps citizens." ---- NOW WHY THE FUCK DIDNT I KNOW NOCTIS HAD DONE COMMUNITY SERVICE, HE WAS REALLY THE PEOPLES PRINCE I HADNT KNOWN OMG HE WAS THE MALE PRINCESS DIANA IM FUCKING THROWING UP OMG MY SWEET BOY I LOVE HIM SO MUCH 

[tokiwarcube]

Hi!! I've been binging your writing, and I love the way you write for all the boys! Could we get something about doing their corpsepaint before a show? Headcanons or drabble, either is good <3 thanks! <3

Oh, yes!! I've been wanting to write something like this for a while -- below the cut! (And thank you so much!! <3)

Nathan Explosion

Nathan has a very specific way of doing things — every piece has to be in its proper place before things can proceed. His perfectionist nature has mostly applied to the music side of things — whether it be through nature or prophecy, he’s never really been able to tell — but that’s not to say that the actual performance is just cobbled together. No; if anything, he’s just as particular about the shows themselves. And corpsepaint is just another piece of it all. Nathan letting you do his paint is quite the sign of trust — a handing over of the reigns. A form of vulnerability, loathe as he is to admit it.

You didn’t think it was possible for his voice to get any deeper than it already is, but as he averts his eyes and mumbles some half-baked response to your mindless prattling, you’re sure you can feel the room shake. He swallows, evidently flustered under your gaze. That fire is only stoked by your gentle touch — the gentle caress of sponge on skin, the tilting of his jaw, the swiping of stray strands… it’s intimate in a way it shouldn’t be, and despite the fact that he can hear his heart pounding in his ears, he’s soaking up every moment of it. He does his best to make small talk, so as not to give away his fluster, but it’s deeply obvious to anyone walking by just how smitten he is with you.

Pickles the Drummer

Pickles has very fond memories of doing his makeup in gas station bathrooms as a teenager and young adult, despite the insults and slurs hurled his way. The glittery makeup of his youth — loud, proud, and very “fuck you” in nature — was truly an artform. Intricate, yet slapped together at the same time. So similar and yet so different from the black and white image of him today. He’s at a perfect middle ground with his paint — it’s a quick, five-minute ordeal for him that despite being thrown on haphazardly, always comes out just as its meant to. Because that’s what makes it good — he doesn’t overthink it. He just does it. So when you offer to do it for him, he’s completely game. You can’t really fuck it up, and even if you managed to, it’s not like it takes long to fix.

He can’t say he’s not enamored with how sweet you are to him, though. And sure, you certainly take a lot longer than he does, but he can’t find it in himself to complain. Not when you look at him so softly, sharing the same breath as you lean in to fix a smudge. He’s as chatty as usual, but don’t let that distract you — he is eating up your attention, and rest assured, he’ll be coming back to you for every show. He smiles, lips darting nervously between his lips, and revels in your lighthearted scolding as you go back over the microcosm he managed to rub away. If you call him out for doing it intentionally, he won’t deny it… but he probably won’t stop, either. Can you blame him, when you keep feeding the beast?

Skwisgaar Skwigelf

Skwisgaar is nothing if not a perfectionist — even with the splotchy nature of Dethklok’s corpsepaint, there always seems to be something wrong with it… unless you’re doing it, of course. The first time you do his paint for him — after a lot of begging on your own end — he’s laying on the charm thick. He’s as much of a flirt as he is a diva, really. But once he realizes how gentle you’re being? How rapt your attention is, with no ulterior motives? He’s suddenly very quiet… and very thankful for the thick layer of paint over his cheeks. After that first time, he withdraws for a little while. He doesn’t mention the incident again, and he doesn’t take up your offer to do it for him anymore. But you notice that when he’s laying the paint on, his eyes bounce over to you more and more often. And then one day, he just… hands the materials over to you before a show. And from then on it becomes a little routine — he doesn’t let anybody else but you do it. He loosens up a bit more then, starts chatting like usual again… but sometimes you’ll notice his ears get a bit red before you paint over them.

“None of these dildos knows what they ams doings, and I amnst going to damage my hands doings this stupids paintings.”

Toki Wartooth

Toki is infuriatingly smooth by pure virtue of the fact that he’s just so… genuine. He’s been doing his own corpsepaint since he was old enough to buy the materials, but after Dethklok went big, he just hasn’t had to. It can be a bit of a struggle wrangling him before a show, and makeup and costuming is just another piece of that rodeo — so, why not take that part on yourself?

“Yous hands ams so soft.”

“You ams have very pretty eyes.”

“Ams you still coming out for drinks afters this?”

His mouth seems to run at a million miles an hour, and you feel yourself start to flush at his unwavering attention. Suffice to say, Toki always asks you to do his paint for him.

William Murderface

For William, the corpsepaint is just some gimmick that really, he doesn’t give too much of a fuck about. He’s picky about his sense of style, and the corpsepaint never really fit into that for him — it’s just a quick paint-and-go type deal. Maybe there’s a half-filled smudge on his cheek, maybe he didn’t get all the way around his eyes — he doesn’t really care. So when you ask to do his paint, he’s a bit confused — maybe even insulted. He doesn’t really give it his all, but it can’t be that bad, can it? He’s a little fractious at first, but be patient enough, and you can get him in a chair. Maybe not without a few self-preserving, defensive comments, but he shuts up real quick when he feels your hand on his face. Tilting him so gently this way and that, brushing the curls out of his face to keep the paint from soaking the strands, dragging your thumb across the right areas to make little smudges… It almost feels like a prank, like someone is going to jump out at any minute and ridicule him for being soft. He thinks he’d deserve it, with how starry-eyed he feels. He whips between your normal conversation and probing questions — have you done this before? This isn’t weird for you? It’s fast enough to give you whiplash, but frankly, you know him well enough by now — a bit of patience goes a long way, and soon enough, he’ll be coming back to have you do it again, and again, and again.

[sothischickshe]

trick or treat!!!

Thank you sweetie 😘😘😘

OK, how about the new beginning to the fic I'm supposedly editing?

Gertie’s truly is a shithole. Abrasively bright bulbs dot its ceiling, providing an ambience nobody is looking for of a bar while glaring nude upon his pummelled pupils. Near half those fixtures are busted but the fact offers only barest relief: that pervasive glare off high gotta be almost worse on the corneas at his shadowier spot than from any island of intense luminosity he bypassed when selecting this outlying spot along the bar. Considerable cobwebs, plus every stain across the close-by clutch of once-cream tabletops, are distressingly easy to catch sight of in this position anyhow.

Vision now sweeping rapid, Rio’s reminded how none of the interior doors entirely fit their frame; journeying for the bathroom’ll involve huffing and froing along that cluttered back hall come fall… This forms a further frustration for forward-fucking-looking, with the year steadily burning onward.

In distracted irritation he huffs deep, subsequently imbibing the upholstery’s reek. As perpetual, it’s of stale tobacco mixed with some pickling fishiness despite the fact he’s never clocked a soul smoking nor eating inside.

Yeah, Gertie’s gotta be at least two or three rungs below your classic dive. A flop, that might be. In more ways than the one though it remains convenient — no trait worth sniffing scornful over — being only a block and a half up from his own bar makes it a handy location to slide upon when not in a particularly, hm, conspicuous mode.

(and for comparison, here's how it started.)

Trick or treat me(me)!

[lemonhemlock]

So then, maybe a weird ask, how would you write or explore Lucemond?

So, a couple of months ago, I accidentally stumbled upon this lucemond fic that completely rearranged my chakras. Thing is I tried to find it recently but couldn't, so perhaps the author deleted it, which is such a pity because it was truly spectacular. I don't remember a whole lot bc it was late at night when I read it (thinking I would come back to it later), but it was very much surreal poetry body horror. I am not a gore girly at all, but the language was mesmerising. I happen to have sent my bf a few snippets for shock value (also not a gore enjoyer), so I can share the little of it I saved:

The tender jelly of Lucerys’ eye bursts like a ripe grape between teeth, climbing, sheer white, up Aemond’s blade, as if it were dripping wax.

Its viscous liquidity leaving no gruesome trophy or good-luck charm to pickle in vinegar and make a gift of, Aemond decides to lick the mucoid fluid from the metal and impel it through his own flesh. When he puts the blade to his tongue no taste but that of his own blood stains the quivering muscle.

If the author of this fic happens upon this post, I'd just want to let you know your talent with words was very appreciated. 🙏

Returning to the topic, I would definitely keep this element and lean into the horror aspect. I'd keep some background jace/luke as vibes, with aegond on the opposing side to make it as spicy and convoluted as possible. (It took me ages to remember I have a jaceluke tag since I hid it so well from team black I ended up hiding it from myself, too. Updated my tags list with this occasion lest we forget!)

Readers of my blog will know by now that I sometimes go on rants about The Magnus Archives, but, bear with me, I think we could borrow some elements to make lucemond really extra fucky. So, within the TMA universe, there are several entities that govern different sets of fears and the one I like the most and the one I think fits really well here is The Beholding - so lots of eye imagery, the fear of being perceived, of secrets being revealed, of forbidden/awful knowledge, of knowledge that would destroy you, of being exposed or shamed or judged. The problem I have with Luke (which permeates a lot into lucemond fics) is that he's so fucking boring and milquetoast & doesn't really react / isn't affected enough by the events surrounding him, so much so that it kind of turns him borderline sociopathic, just in the most boring way possible. So let's give him some internal conflict!

I would give Luke a serious case of scopophobia, basically turn him into the perfect victim for the Beholding. Make him realise deep down that he's a bastard and how much danger he's in because of his mother's lies and gaslighting. Make him terrified of becoming Lord of Driftmark, like actively paranoid some Velaryon cousin is going to slash his throat in his sleep or something (maybe even Rhaena??) Have that intensify after Vaemond's execution, because now the blacks have already spilled first blood in his name. Have him feel increasingly isolated from his family because they feel like he's exaggerating and don't really grasp the gravity of the situation - in addition to more gentle gaslighting done by Rhaenyra, who thinks this is the proper way to assuage his fears (even ridiculous stuff like how he shares blood with Borros Baratheon via Rhaenys), and more violent type of suppression by Jace, who absolutely does not want to hear about how they're bastards and everybody knows about it. So the fear of being perceived, of his "secrets" being revealed, only worse, because they're already out in the open, so what he really fears is shame and judgment, which could come at any minute. Any person could at any time start pointing out what an obvious bastard he is and the entire foundation of his life would start cracking.

This intense fear of judgment would be where lucemond comes into play. Aemond as a person he actively harmed, an act that he did his best to sweep under the rug, absolutely horrified to face him, because that would mean facing his actual crimes; the punishment/retribution for that would have to be immense and he's not in a proper headspace to handle that. When he finally sees Aemond again, fighting fit and ready to go, all those feelings of inadequacy would come crashing down. Aemond casting his single eye of furious judgment on Luke, painfully aware of each and every one of Luke's flaws and planning his wrathful comeuppance!

In TMA, I really enjoyed the statements where The Eye would terrorize their victim* because I personally found it hilarious, so I think I'd try to recreate that dynamic a bit between Aemond and Luke. Whether it veers into body horror and violence or remains at the promise of violence and psychological torment, I think there's a lot to explore in a funky, novel way that doesn't involve this unearned Romeo and Juliet binomial.

If you're really intent on turning this sexual, I think an under-discussed aspect of the eye-gouging is how Luke essentially gave Aemond a huge disadvantage when it comes to participating in traditional masculinity, something that we know Aemond cares a lot about - being a model Targaryen prince, having the depth perception necessary to ride his dragon, his martial prowess, even him being suitably attractive to the opposite sex. It wouldn't be outrageous to presume all of these new issues halted Aemond's sexual and social development and that it would make him feel Some Kind of Vengeful Way about it that would maybe manifest itself not in a very socially-appropriate way. Like, mayhaps, wanting Luke to undergo similar pains? ☠

For Aemond's side, I stumbled on this tik tok once that really encapsulates the kind of vibes I think would be really fun to play with. A corruption arc, being consumed by vengeance, allowing yourself to give into your worst impulses, contemplating the nature of justice etc.

For the aegond bit mentioned above, I really like this idea. Luke pondering which is worse: facing Aemond directly or being decimated by his big brother, who he himself once looked up to.

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*Here is an example if anyone is interested in the vibe I'm going for. I bookmarked the clip for when the statement begins, because the rest of the episode is filled with the metaplot: MAG 193 A Stern Look,

Some quotes from the transcripts!

He recognises those eyes. He’s seen them all his life, watching him, judging him, cutting through him so no part of him was secret or safe. They peel away the armour, his carefree smile and practiced shrugs. 

His mind races. He can’t tell the truth, obviously. Elias can’t look this man in the face, and tell him that he is what scares him. That his eyes, the curiosity and judgement that pulses out of them, they terrify him in a way he can’t put into words. He feels that prickly panic building in the back of his skull, that worry that spills through: he knows. 

A cough from over the desk breaks his train of thought. His interviewer is staring at him, and all at once he’s back with himself, burning with embarrassment. Those eyes stare, impassive and stern as ever, but… is that a twinkle of satisfaction? As though he has been given him an answer he likes.

He stops. Those eyes. They know. They can see right through all his bullshit, right to the core of him. They know what he really thinks.