#IF ITS NOT EVEN YOUR FUCKING NUMBER

[wolfisland]

the number unimelb gave me for the small animal mobile clinic going to a fucking PERTH number who has no fucking idea who i am or why im calling at 8:42 a.m >>>>>>>

[edwinisms]

george rexstrew deserves awards for many things but i have to say. edwin’s bloodcurdling scream as niko gets killed deserves a whole award unto itself. like. that scream did not feel at all like a tv show scream. to a somewhat jarring degree. and i can’t express how much I respect that

[sage-is-in-fact-very-tired]

might've cooked too hard on this. it sure is. so many worbs. [18,320 words, to be exact.]

but, i commit to my bit, and I will continue to do so because i'm a *loser* - so, welcome to the “sage looked at the c!sherb playlist and went far more bonkers than probably necessary” post. because uh. nothing i say ever stays a bit very long-

—

[Section One - Man. Icarus Morningstar is such a character. The most character of all time.]

-> [Icarus]

-> In my mind, this is 2 to 3 people talking to/about Icarus. The first section, up until the instrumental in the middle, being Centross. Just the whole idea of drinking, it feels very much Centross about them. (“Living beyond your years” is very reset coded - not Centross talking about them, but the rest of that section definitely feels like Centross.) The second section, up until “you put up your defenses when you leave”, is very much Fable talking about them. Just the whole idea of them falling - he would've been the one to see that - and the whole idea of him being scared of that happening again and again and *again.* The last section, following that, could be argued it's either Centross or Rae. How they both know that Icarus puts up this front, this armor, when they talk to people, when they walk around, and only really *really* drop that when they're alone or when Centross or Rae is around. (Well. There's an argument that they *don't* drop their walls completely around Centross or Rae, but this is playlist analysis, not character analysis-)

(Also the whole reset idea of Icarus dying over and over again, forgetting over and over again - falling over and over again.)

-> [Redesign Your Logo]

-> This is very much about the whole change from *just* yellow's and golds, to the yellow and purple color scheme they end up with due to the eye. It's very Midas to Icarus coded, basically. Because as a kid, they were mostly dressed up in yellows, but as time went on, and as the eye happened, and as the resets started, that *changed.* they shifted into wearing purples more often, mixing them with yellow - for all intents and purposes, redesigning the logo they had previously had. Also the whole idea of the trident changing from the trident to the Quixis symbol - cause. Yeah that's kinda Icarus’ logo. (The argument could also be made about how they become nicer with the eye and the following resets - their logo, their typical-ness of being a snarky asshole shifts into being something kind and caring and compassionate. It's Redesigned, and it's at least *partially* Midas’ doing.)

-> [Any Day Now]

-> Icarus about the wack. How they want it to stop, *think* it will stop, soon. It'll stop ‘any day now’ - it can't keep going forever, can it? (Also the pain Icarus is constantly going through - the bad, the horrible and the terrible and the suffering - it'll stop eventually, right? It can't keep going on forever - it'll stop any day now as long as they can *make it* there, make it to the point they're good and happy and it can stop. They just have to keep going and it’ll *stop.*)

-> [&]

-> Icarus’ hypocrisy. How they do things, harm, yell at, everything like that, to others - while doing the same things they're berating others for themself. How they'll do one thing, and call it fine, while criticizing that *exact* same thing. Also could be seen in a light of Fable talking about Icarus’ actions and friendships and things of that sort.

-> [Comb Attack]

-> Okay this one is. Mmm. Okay. Most of the words in here are very glitchy, very cut off from each other - something about the resets cutting off Icarus? Cutting their words off, cutting their actions off, cutting their memories off, *glitching* them.

-> [Hungover in the City of Dust]

-> Icarus’ Isolation. How their friends are constantly leaving them alone and isolated, and how they're constantly pushing people away, and how they're left running around in circles trying to catch up, trying to save themself, figure out what's wrong, figure out how to *fix it.*

-> [Mr. Backwards]

-> Icarus’ more backwards way of thinking. How they'll tell you what they *want* How they're hurting, but they're not going to tell you. How they're trying so desperately to not let people see that, seem so backward to others.

-> [Never Meant to Know]

-> Just the whole idea that there is so much about this world that Icarus cannot and should not be privy to until the correct time - how they live their life rather peacefully up to that point, not knowing, never knowing. The whole idea of the resets - and how really, truly, Icarus wasn’t supposed to know about *any* of this, how they were supposed to be *dead* and they’re not, they were genuinely *never* meant to know.

-> [Out of the Box]

-> Resets. The whole idea that Icarus has died again and again - and that whole like. Abrupt manner of the resets. How they can be doing something one moment and the next they're outside, surrounded by grass and surprised.

-> [Digital Silence]

-> Icarus siding with Fable, and really, Icarus’ actions in general - How they have to do this, regardless of what others say, and regardless of how it makes them *feel* - they *need* to do what they're doing right now; it's all a means to an end and they *need to* do it - because if they don't, things could go very wrong and very different. (Different in a bad way, of course.)

-> [Alien Blues]

-> Just kind of describing Icarus’ whole life - the pain, the bad, the terrible. The whole idea Icarus plays everything off as a joke - they *don't* let people see what really happens, and the snark and asshole attitude people give them because of that. Also maybe the whole idea of the way the things snark them sometimes after bad things, when they're repeating history in a bad way. (Also also also “I'd do anything for you, Mrs. Highness” something about how they’d do anything for Fable, *anything* - even if it meant killing their family, if it meant that he might love them; if it meant they’d be good and they’d have succeeded in something - succeeded instead of *failing.*)

-> [Under My Skin]

-> Just. Everything with being not entirely yourself. Everything about being yourself on the outside, but having someone else simmering right under your skin, telling you things, making you do things. The entire idea that Icarus isn't entirely all *themself.*

-> [Able]

-> That whole idea of Icarus not wanting to be alone in their own mind sometimes, on top of wanting to just be *fine* - on time of trying to so desperately *convince* themself that they're all entirely and completely fine. Saying it out loud so it properly sets into their mind, so it properly comes to fruition.

-> [Mirror Man]

-> That need to be *seen* by someone - anyone. That need to be heard and seen and known by someone - and the knowledge that if they don't, Icarus will make it worse for not only themself, but *everyone* else - make them live Icarus’ nightmare.

-> [Brass Goggles]

-> A) Copper duo; B) That whole idea, almost, that Icarus likes to shove down their feelings. They like to pretend the Icarus that has bad, upset emotions doesn't exist - at least, when in front of people. That whole idea that they try to present themself as someone who doesn't break down in front of others, they try not to cry and they try so desperately to keep this facade up and teach themself more as time goes on how to do so.

-> [Bleed Magic]

-> In my mind, this is very Midas talking to Icarus. Just that whole idea of Midas knowing what Icarus is like; that whole idea that Icarus is *lonely*, that no one believes them just because of how much they *lied*, and is, somehow, bleeding magic out. Literally, in the direct form of Sherbert's eye (Which was, in a way, *killing* Sherbert - not necessarily the bleeding eye, just simply the fact they didn’t become Quixis when they needed to), as well as the whole concept that due to the fact they didn't become Quixis when they should've, Midas has spent far far too much time and energy and *magic* on them. Icarus literally draining them, bleeding them, leaving them with such little control.

-> [Gold]

-> This being about how everything they touch changes no matter what they do, how they try so hard to keep if from changing - but the wack is random, Midas’ can't control it, and so it *changes,* it changes gold and bright. Everything they touch changes to gold, huh?

-> [Gold]

-> Just, I guess, that whole idea that no matter how many people leave them, or get killed around them, or anything like that, they'll come back. The idea that those people can't break like that, because Icarus has always seen them like a rock that *can't* break.

-> [creature]

-> That whole idea of how Icarus *is* Creation's child. They are creation, in a way. They push His ideals, however subconsciously, into people. He is leading their way, and will be, and this is a good thing. And Icarus pushes and pushes this idea - showing both the good parts of themself, not quite the good parts of Creation, as well as the bad more twisted parts, parts almost completely Fable's fault due to them almost being *His* ideals. (“I am creation, both haunted and holy.”) Also almost that whole idea of the resets, their body re-created and re-created over and over and *over* again. They *are* the embodiment of Creation's powers - a person remade through Him, made in His image, made to be the person *He* wants them to be. Haunted, in the idea they might as well be a ghost, and Holy simply because Fable deems them as such - deems them His favorite.

-> [Path to Isolation]

-> A) Oh my gods this song is so fucking coded what the fuck; B) The whole idea of how loss, be it of someone, or *something* - leads them down this path. Leads Icarus so often down this path of immense anger, leads them down the path of the side of the enemy. That whole idea of everything breaking, be it through their own means or someone else's. That whole idea that going down this path so often means that they're so incredibly alone, and means they can't *recognize* themself - they don't know who they've become in all this pain and hell and *bad*, they can't find it. They just keep falling apart and they don't even know when or where to begin to pick up the pieces.

-> [Bet On It]

-> Just that whole idea that Icarus wants to do the right thing, so desperately. Despite all their doubts, their disbelief, their questions about this world, they want to do the right thing - they *will* do the right thing. They need to. They've put all their effort into doing the right thing - it'd all fall apart if they didn't continue to do that.

[Section Two - Broters. also family <3]

-> [Problems]

-> Am I aware this is on the playlist because of Charles? Yes. Am I going to say this is brothers coded anyway? *absolutely.* Because it is brothers coded - something about Icarus seeing themself as bad and someone who can't be saved, while they view their brother in a significantly better light, and see him as the good one and the one who's gonna save them.

-> [Two Birds]

-> *Separation* - This is very much Icarus and Rae drifting away from each other. Icarus drifting away and leaving and hiding, while Rae continues time and time and *time* again to help them and save them and drag them back *home.*

-> [Family Line]

-> Something just about repeating history, and something about following after your parents, and something about how they'll try to change and change themself so much so they don't mirror their parents, and something about how they have to live with everything their parents have done.

-> [Call Them Brothers]

-> Separation!! Again!! The brothers are apart from each other, separated rather permanently through the resets, and, from Icarus’ point of view, they probably *can't* fix it. They can't mend themselves back together like they used to, they're broken.

-> [Brother]

-> Something about how despite being broken, despite all the separation and time lost that hangs between them, they still rely on each other. They'll still help each other no matter the cost, because, in the end, they're still brothers - they still love each other and they still *care.*

-> [Rule #4 - Fish in a Birdcage]

-> Icarus being trapped and isolated, be it through their own doings or their father's or *anyone's*, and how Rae will always be there to sooth them, help them, care for them, *love them.* He cares so desperately, and he'll do his best to take care of them, and Icarus *believes it* - that he loves them.

-> [Icarus]

-> This one feels *mostly* Rae talking to Icarus - Seeing just how far they've flown, and just how far they're willing to fall. That realization of what Icarus has become after all of this, and trying so very hard to drag Icarus back down in any way he can. The last part is Icarus to Rae, however. That try to get him to stop - that “you can't save me, Rae.” That acknowledgment, no matter when in the timeline, that Rae can't save Icarus. (Icarus has to be the one to save themself.)

-> [The Family Jewels]

-> Just that whole idea of cycles - that whole idea of just fucked their whole family is. That whole idea that this cycle of pain and suffering will continue until *they* (Icarus) stops it. Their almost snark to Rae, that idea that they only share *one* last name - Morningstar - and not both. Also that whole idea of Icarus being the favorite - that Fable conditioned them to be the “better” one, conditioned them to be like *this.* (Also just the whole idea of “jewels” - royalty. That idea, almost, of Icarus welcoming Rae to this life. This life of trying too hard, so very hard to be perfect - to be the best, to be royalty, because they have to be. And, arguably, that realization that Rae never had to live that life. That realization Rae never *had* to be the perfect one - Rae got to. Live normally, pretty much. Whereas Icarus grew up young having to be a prince and be as perfect as they could.))

-> [Sparkbird]

-> The whole idea of Icarus noticing little things, pointing them out, needing Rae to notice them. The whole idea that Icarus grew up far *far* too quickly, and Rae is almost their outlet of that - they want so desperately to make up for a) all the time they lost with the resets, and b) all the times Icarus was just an asshole to him.

-> [When the Day Met the Night]

-> Did Sherb say this was Fable, Enderian, and Isla? Yes. Am I going to say it’s brothers coded anyway? Also yes. Just the whole idea of how Rae is always there for Icarus, and how they make each other better when they’re together, and how yes, they often have their bad moments between each other, but in the end, there’s always good - in the end they always manage to find a way to have the sun shine brightly upon them, how in the end they still love and care to deeply about each other.

-> [Icarus]

-> Rae to Icarus. That whole idea that Rae can so easily see through Icarus’ front - so easily see what they're trying to hide. The idea that Rae can so easily see the danger Icarus so often leads themself to, and so often tries to deter them away from that. The whole thing of Rae so often giving Icarus an *out* - asking them questions, leading them in the right direction. (Or, at the very least, trying his hardest to do so.)

-> [I've Got You]

-> Considering this is a Zenni song, and one made for Fable specifically, it doesn't *really* need an explanation - However, just like. The whole idea that despite everything, despite all the brothers have been through and all their arguing and all their bad and terrible, Icarus and Rae still care about each other. Icarus will still keep Rae safe no matter what happens, because that's what older brothers *do*, that's what *family* does.

[Section Three - Season one, am I right or am I right-]

-> [Fine]

-> Just that whole idea at the beginning of season 1 that everything was actually *okay.* It was fine, it was okay, they were all *okay.* Nothing bad had happened yet (at least, not that they could remember), and it was all going well - and the idea that it was going to *continue* to go well. To them, nothing bad was going to happen, because why would it? It's all gone well up to this point - why would it start now?

-> [My Eyes]

-> This is very early corruption - the first part being Icarus, that slow realization of what they're falling into - bad and anger and hopelessness (almost?), and that whole idea that they're getting *worse.* The second part is Momboo - almost trying to comfort herself and Icarus, convince herself and Icarus of what they (Icarus) *really* wants - that they don't want to be bad, truly. (Regardless of their actions, and what Momboo and Co see so clearly in front of them.)

-> [If I Killed Someone for You]

-> Icarus to Momboo in early corruption. The idea of their true sense of self - or at least, the sense of self they had before - is slowly rotting away as corruption takes hold. Slowly killing the good person they were, slowly killing them, and leaving only the bad, ugly, and bloodied pieces of them. Would she still care about them, still hold their hands, if they weren't the same person she had fallen in love with?

-> Could also be viewed as Icarus to Momboo in late corruption, more towards the end, after killing Haley. How there's physically blood and gore on their hands, and would she still hold their hands knowing that that covered their hands like that.

-> [Laplace's Angel (Hurt People? Hurt People!)]

-> Corruption. Basically Icarus to *everyone* - That snark of “am I *really* that bad?” because they know, if necessary, they can be so *so* much worse. That acknowledgment that if anyone else was in their shoes, they'd probably drop to the same lows they had - the same bad, terrible and horrible actions. (Well - they *think.* They come to know later that probably wouldn't be the case, but it's almost what they end up believing up until, really, Breaking Bonds.) Just that whole idea of their mentality during corruption - how bad they can be, and how much worse they could be, and how much someone else in their same shoes would be just as bad.

-> [Ways to Be Wicked]

-> Very Ominous Bane. Just that whole idea of there being so many ways they can just be *evil.* The whole idea of trying to convince people to join their side, to join their cause, to change the story, to be *bad.*

-> [Heathens]

-> Sherb said this is very Easton talking to Athena about Ominous Bane/Icarus, Centross, and kinda sorta Seven, and I very much agree with that. Just the whole idea of a *warning* - of how messy and chaotic and bad Ominous Bane can be. The whole idea of everything they've been through before this, be it if they remember it or not, and how it affects them still to this day. The whole concept of someone trying to warn Athena of what they're getting into, *tell them* what everyone here is like.

-> [I WANNA BE YOUR SLAVE]

-> Just that whole idea of wanting to be seen as good by Enderian - almost? That whole idea of *wanting* to be her puppet, and wanting her to tell them what to do. (And that whole idea of after it, wanting to be redeemed.)

-> [Twisted]

-> Hot take - Icarus taunting people. Icarus trying to get Ominous Bane with them to help taunt people - *specifically* Athena. Just that whole idea of trying to get them to believe that, a, they're not a hero, they're not going to be - and b, this world as it is, isn't worth saving. They need to mess with it, blow stuff up, kill people, *something* to make it worth it.

-> [Ramalama (Bang Bang)]

-> Just the whole idea of Icarus and Co going around and blowing shit up. Just the snark and annoyance and bullshit they say during it, and the stuff they tell people while they're blowing stuff up - the whole *loudness* and bangs of the explosions - all of it.

-> [Secret]

-> Icarus asking Athena to keep all of this - Ominous Bane, *everything* about corruption - a secret. That loosely veiled threat of what would happen if Athena told *anyone* - what would happen to *them* if they dare spill that to others. The fact that Icarus so desperately wanted to keep corruption, keep their actions, keep Ominous Bane and Athena's involvement in it, a *secret.* (And how, in the end, they can't. Because in the end, Athena *tells* - and Athena gets hurt because of that, but they also get *saved* because of it.)

-> [Hawk in the Night]

-> Icarus to Athena - That whole idea of Athena doing good and being what Icarus wants her to be for them and Ominous Bane. That whole idea that Athena should fight against their friends, stop trying to call out to them for help, stop trying anything - and being proud when Athena would finally end up doing that, cutting ties.

-> Hot take, not in the correct spot in the playlist for this, but also Fable talking to Icarus - be it before or after the cathedral. That whole idea of Fable *wanting* Icarus to isolate themself from their friends and brother, and being pleased when they did that; as well as the whole idea of fighting your friends and family and siding with the “bad guys” and not, well, your family. (Or well, Your family family. The people who really love you. The people who’d care if you’d die. The people who want you to be there and you to be around them.)

-> [Sharks]

-> Just that whole idea of Icarus and Ominous Bane almost taunting Athena while he’s with them. The whole idea that everyone knows, that Athena thinks they can be better than everyone else (when in reality they’re just the same), and the whole idea that one day Athena will see that all she’s doing is swimming with sharks that want her gone and dead and hurt the same as everyone else.

-> Another hot take, Rae to Icarus around A Brother’s Final Stand. That whole idea that one day Icarus will realize their mistakes and missteps and wrong doings and how *Fable* is wrong, and they’ll truly realize how in too deep they are, and just how deep they’ve gone to swim with the sharks.

-> [Lies]

-> Just that whole idea of *all* the lies Icarus tells during season 1. To others, to get people on their side; to Ominous Bane to make themself look better; to *themself* to hide away they're *cracking.*

-> [We Both Reached for the Gun]

-> That whole idea of being a puppet to someone else. That whole idea of someone standing behind you, trying to control your actions and words and *everything* about you. That whole idea of corruption, being a puppet to yourself - in a weird sort of way. And that whole idea that during corruption and Ominous Bane, Centross tried so desperately to make Icarus do what *he* wanted.

-> [Wolf in Sheep's Clothing]

-> Just the whole idea of corruption. All that anger and upset and *mad* - targeted at *everyone.* Arguably, Icarus to Centross. Just that anger at how he gets to Enderian, that anger he gets to do whatever *he* wants, and they're delegated to. whatever this is. All of the arguing that happens between them - it's very season 1 prison duo.

-> [Play With Fire]

-> This is Centross and Enderian, yes; *Arguably* them almost taunting Icarus. The whole idea of them getting to do all of this, and do it *together* - while Icarus hasn't even gotten to *talk* to Enderian.

-> [Can't Stand the Rain]

-> Just that whole idea of literally not being able to stand the rain - how it's constant, how it means this just keeps going and going and *going* and they're not really getting any further than before. (Also like that whole idea of love - how there's truly no such thing as it, as long as this keeps going; as long as they’re corrupted.)

-> [Bust Your Kneecaps (Johnny Don't Leave Me)]

-> Three Strikes Three Strikes Three Strikes. This is so *incredibly* three strikes coded. Just that whole idea of Icarus taunting Athena, chasing after them and everyone else, threatening them. The way that Icarus was fully willing to hunt and kill all of them - fully willing to *go there* and hurt them like that.

-> [6up 5oh Copout (Pro / Con)]

-> This is so very prison coded. Just that whole anger at the fact they were even *put there* - the idea that people would dare misuse their trust like that to trap them. The anger of being alone and trapped and the fact no one was even *considering* letting them out. That need and what to be *out* because they were perfectly fucking *fine* - they didn't need to be trapped like this, why did they even *think* Icarus needed to be trapped like this?

-> [Murders]

-> Getting put in the prison. The idea that they go looking for something, they’re promised something and they work incredibly hard to get to that point - but in the end the prison ruins that for them. In the end, all their efforts were really worth nothing. All their efforts to see the end of this weren’t worth anything because look at where they are now. Look at where this has gotten them - trapped in a prison, panicked and alone and *hurt.*

-> [Nothing Left To Lose]

-> Loose Ends Loose Ends Loose Ends. This is so very incredibly Loose Ends coded. Just that whole idea of Icarus’ to put Centross into the prison - and their attempt at that. Then Centross almost immediately trying to put *them* back into the cell. The following argument and then Centross flying off, Icarus and Rae following. And then the whole idea of Icarus trying so *desperately* to keep him from blowing up their house - and failing because Centross just doesn't give a shit. Centross doesn't have any attachments to them anymore, they've served their purpose (his words), and he doe\snt need to keep them or their house or their anything around any longer - and so he goes through with blowing it up. He leaves Icarus alone there to pick up whatever they can.

-> [As the World Caves In]

-> The season 1 finale - just that whole idea of Centross blowing up the tree, the world literally caving in as Fable rips away yet another page. The way everyone gets ready, gathers around for the funeral of a woman none of them *really* knew, ready to mourn, but not knowing the events that would follow; they get ready for a funeral - only it’s not *only* Haley’s, but also their own. Sure they’ll come back, but the world will still cave in, and the person that sat in those seats will be long gone by the time they do.

-> Arguably also could be the season 2 reset - that whole idea of getting ready and dressing up and *armoring* up to fight Perix/The Warden and getting to that point, putting her soul into the portal frame; only to find Midas had switched Fable and Haley and it was all for nothing, and. Oh. Now the world is caving in - it’s falling apart.

-> [What if Tomorrow Comes]

-> I guess really that whole idea of hoping that Centross blowing up the tree isn't really, truly, the end of this all. That hope that tomorrow will come regardless because this can’t be the end. But also almost that doubt and unknown of if it really would come - that idea that, to them, it really seemed like they were *going* to die with no way of coming back. (And that whole idea of being proven very wrong as they wake up a few weeks later in a reset world, and slowly work to get their memories back as time goes on. That realization that tomorrow *will* come because it came once, it came tens of times before, so it’ll come again and again until they figure all of this out and stop it.)

[Section Four - Season two, why are at least a half of these about putting centross in the prison. *sherb*]

-> [New Life]

-> Just that whole idea of how since no one remembers at the beginning of the Sculk reset, they all - Icarus especially - have an opportunity to, at least until they remember properly, start anew. Icarus doesn’t remember, and for a while no one really remembers them, so they have an opportunity to have a new life; to rebuild things long since broken and make them better. Icarus doesn't have to worry about everything they did in the past if no one can remember it, meaning they get a free past to - at least, for a while, and for all intents and purposes - start a new life on a clean slate.

-> [People I Don't Like]

-> Very much Centross at the beginning of season 2 - to everyone really; though considering this *is* the Icarus playlist, it's arguably to Icarus. Just that whole idea that Centross *knows* them and everything they did and all the feelings he holds about them - and the whole idea that Icarus just. Doesn't. That whole thing of Centross trying to make himself seem good in everyone's eyes, save face and all of that - especially to Icarus. (Especially considering Icarus has/had *very* strong feelings about everything Centross did and told them and. All of that. Not that they remembered all of that at the beginning of the reset, but. Concept.)

-> [Turn The Lights Off]

-> The whole vibe at the beginning of season 2 that people shouldn't go to the end - or at least go to the end *alone* - because look at where that got people last time. Don’t go to the end because you could end up corrupted just like *they* did, and they don’t want that to happen again.

-> Part of me would also say, maybe not within this season, but also season 3 - with the end, that this could also be used in reference to the Worldport and how it’s decaying and how that’s where Quixis is and everything that happens every time Icarus goes in there.

-> You could also maybe make the argument that it’s about Purgatory and Fable - Don’t go with him, don’t go in there and subject yourself to that because you could become more of a monster than a man - more of a loyal soldier than yourself, more of a guard dog than a person. Don’t go down that hole, turn those lights off, because who knows what will happen. (Don’t side with him because you’ll become the monster you’ve always feared becoming - you’ll become the person you’ve never wanted to become.)

-> [The Devil You Know]

-> That whole idea of Icarus not remembering - but also *wanting* not to remember. Icarus has seen the way people react to them, they don't want to remember that person. Sure, right now they're not the *most* amazing person, but they can tell that they were so so much worse before - and they don't want to remember that. It's better to *just* remember the devil they are now, the person they've become, than the person - devil - they were before.

-> [What Did I Do?]

-> Very much season 2 Icarus runaway arc. Just that whole lead up if it - that idea of them wondering what they've done for months and months, and their proposal of an *arena*, and the fallout, the way they ran. That whole idea of them not knowing what they did, what they were, who they were; that whole idea of them wondering what they *did* to be looked at like *that* - what they did to be talked to like that and threatened, what they did to make their family (the only semblance of stability they had even during season 2) so *afraid* of them. (And almost the idea that they were afraid of that - afraid and scared of being viewed in such a way; that idea that this is an active fear that they have.)

-> [It's Not the Same Anymore]

-> Very much Icarus remembering - but less that immediate “*oh fuck yeah I remember!*” and more that “oh. fuck. I *remember.*” Just that whole idea of now that they remember, nothing back home, nothing within town, is going to be the same. None of it will have the same connotations to it, and none of their relationships with people will be the same - because now Icarus *knows* and now they're going to be far, *far* more cautious with their words and actions. It's not the same - and oh how they remember just how fucking *miserable* they were. Additionally, that kind of whole idea of how they should be happy, they should be happy now that they've remembered everything - they *know* now; but really, in the long term, remembering everything just makes it so so much harder to navigate *everything.* (The vibe the end of the song really gives is after all of the Prison Arc Part 2, Icarus trying to make up and make their relationships and friendships and *everything* better - fix them up and pick up broken pieces.)

-> [Could've Been Me]

-> Remembering but we're happy this time! Don't think about all of the consequences and bad feelings and *everything* that comes with remembering you're a horrible person - only focus on the fact you remembered and can now go home and definitely totally be incredibly happy with your family again! All jokes aside, that's very much the vibe this song has. Just that whole idea of Icarus being incredibly happy that they've remembered everything - that they can go *home* finally, they don't have to stay out in the middle of nowhere alone because they're terrified of hurting people. Also that whole idea of everything they want to do now that they remember and know where the line is - know what they can say that won't tow too far over a line and/or trigger someone.

-> [Brutus]

-> Oh to be Icarus Morningstar upon opening their door, post remembering, and seeing David Centross Mistvale. Just that whole anger and upset Icarus holds for Centross after they remember. That anger at what he did, at what he didn't do, at what he said and told them, the anger at what he *left them with* - and the anger that *he* got to talk to Enderian. He got to hear her and listen to her and know her, and Icarus didn't. He was her favorite, and *gods* how that made Icarus so very angry. And the whole idea of how that anger carries over - how Icarus so desperately wanted what Centross had, and didn't get it, and now that they remember they want to *make* it known just how angry they are. (And that whole idea and action of putting him in the prison.)

-> [Absinthe]

-> Very similar to Brutus - that just *anger* at Centross for all of this. That anger at everything he did and everything he said and everything about the endstone reset. And also that way they *don't* believe that front he's put him since the beginning of the reset - don't believe the “good guy” front he's tried to keep up since appearing this reset.

-> [The Main Character]

-> The whole idea that they can do this - do what they're doing to Centross, and *keep doing it* because there are worse people than them out there - there are so so much worse people than them out there, so they can do this, because, well, they’re better; they’re not bad bad like a lot of people. The idea that this is okay because of everything else.

-> [You're Not Welcome]

-> Just all of that angry Icarus holds for Centross bubbling over - this *is* the act of putting him in the prison. That need to make it known he's *not* welcome - the idea they try to convince both themself and him of that no one would care if he just disappeared. And, well. Welcome to the first of like four more detailed line by line analysis cause i'm a loser.

“Don't you know you're not welcome ‘round here?” Just that whole idea of Icarus being willing to lock him away because they fully believe, what to believe, want *him* to believe that he's not welcome - he's not welcome and therefore that makes their following actions “okay.”

“I think you should go ‘fore you cause some drama.” Almost that idea that he needs to leave - he shouldn't be here. That whole idea that he should leave before *they* do something. That whole idea that if he stays, regardless of if he does something, they’re going to *hurt him.*

“Don't you know I'm the one you should fear?” They *want* him to be afraid of them - want him fear them so they *finally* have that upper hand on him. (Want him to be afraid of them like they were afraid of him after they got out of the prison - want him to know that fear, want them to be able to get their revenge.)

“Talk to me if you've got a problem.” That whole idea that Icarus wants to be the one to deal with him - that whole thing of no one else dealing with Centross the way *Icarus* thinks he should be dealt with.

“I can't believe you used to truly scare me.” Because he *did* genuinely scare them - after they were uncorrupted they were genuinely and truly scared of him. However, like this, with the offer that Icarus can stab him, with the way he just lets himself get put into the prison, he's really not that scary. They can't believe he used to genuinely scare them when he's just. almost pitiful like this - in the prison.

“You were like a ghost story told to keep me weary. But I never listened, no, I slept good ‘til morning.” Arguably *he* was the one telling them the ‘ghost stories’ - the warnings he'd tell them, the arguments they'd get into. The way Icarus never heeded them, only pushing further and further until they tipped him (or themself) over the edge. The way Icarus would just sleep it off - because that's what they always did.

“And when our paths finally crossed, I didn't heed the warning.” Similar to that last line - Icarus didn't heed any warning. Icarus just kept pushing and pushing and pushing, arguing with Centross over and over and *over* again.

“Then push, push, push, push. Yeah, you pushed me to the edge.” Haley. Arguably, Centross was part of the reason Icarus killed her in the first place. That need to prove themself not only to Enderian, but also to Centross. That need to prove they weren't useless (weren't a *failure*), that they could be of use to Ominous Bane and weren't just *there* - that they could *do something.*

“I used to dread the thought of falling quickly” Something something resets something something. While they don't remember them or know about them at this point in time, just that whole idea of falling like that. Also, arguably, that whole idea of falling into an ideal and thought process - that idea they don't like to do that quickly, they don't like falling down a thought rabbit hole without thinking and considering it properly first. (Even though they do that so incredibly often.)

“But now I just wish that you'd send me off that ledge - So I can finally fucking take you with me” But also that whole idea that if it meant Centross was going down with them? if them falling down a thought rabbit hole, if them falling and doing something terrible, meant Centross would go down with them? If him pushing them to that point meant they'd go down *together* - two birds, one stone and all - and no one could be hurt by him again? Oh Icarus would gladly fall down. They'd gladly let themself if it meant they could kill or hurt or do *something* to him that meant they were going down together.

-> [Blood // Water]

-> Just that whole idea of Icarus being so very angry at Centross for all of this. That whole idea of there literally being blood in the water - he tried to kill all of them, and he *did* kill hundreds more. That whole idea that Icarus doesn't plan on letting him go *any* time soon - they want him so desperately to know just how what he did made them feel. (Also “you poisoned me just for another dollar in your pocket” that whole idea that he let Icarus dig themself into this hole, he argued and argued and *argued* and pushed and poisoned their mind with thoughts and words that *stuck.*)

-> [Lonely]

-> They hate each other, yes. However, What if they held hands about it? Maybe even kissed about it. Just like. That whole idea of of how during the season 2 prison arc they were really each other's *only* company. They were alone, but alone together. Yeah they hated each other - but they still *had* each other. That whole idea Icarus was *alone* - but they still had someone, regardless of how much they hated each other. (Also “Hey love, Have mercy on me, and keep me company” is very Centross to Icarus. Just that idea of wanting mercy, wanting Icarus to *stop* hurting him - but also still wanting that company because they were *alone.*)

-> [GONER]

-> They definitely still hate each other - like absolutely still hate each other. Like they are arguing and fighting and snapping at each other every fucking opportunity they get the longer Centross is in the prison - especially more towards the end, Centross is being just as snippy and antagonistic towards Icarus as they're being to him. That whole idea of Centross snipping at them - that idea of “at least he fights back when he's imprisoned.” However, arguably, they also probably kissed about it. They hate each other - but like, sometimes you have to acknowledge the other person is definitely a little kiss-able. (“You look so damn appetizing” like. *like.* so many of these lines imply they at the very *very* least kissed about it.)

-> [Forgive Me Chester]

-> Very end of season 2/the season 2 reset. Really that whole idea of seeing the 3 people you've spent your life chasing after all at once, all in the same room, all together. That idea of fighting the Warden, that whole idea of trying to get Fable out, that whole idea of trying to finally chase the bad away - chase the resets and the Warden and the anger and the bad and *all of it.*

-> Verse one is very much talking about Haley; Verse two is about Centross (prison duo the beloved); Verse three is about Rae, something about broters and their relationship being good for that bit at the end there.

-> [Rock in a God's Shoe]

-> Just that general demeanor of late season 2 - trying to figure out if Fable getting out would *actually* help (even if Icarus really really wants him back), and that whole idea of trying to figure out if he will actually be on their side or not. That worry after everything that happened with Perix that maybe he isn't. Also that idea of Fable not giving that much information, and them all trying their absolute *hardest* to figure out how to get him out. (Also that bit at the end is Icarus to Midas coded, especially with the glitchy voice, and in this essay I will-)

-> [Moonsickness]

-> Very much the season 2 reset. The annoyance at Fable, that annoyance and *anger* at Quixis. That very demeanor they have toward Quixis at the end - being done with them and being annoyed at them; them seeing themself as a failure because of *course* they fucked up the thing that was supposed to help them. They can't do anything right ever - they fuck up *everything* they touch. Also, hot take, Midas talking to Icarus and Fable (and almost the grove in general? but I feel like *mostly* Fable). and, well, I have thoughts about some of these lines, so take this silly more specific analysis. (Not *every* line, just some I picked. Because if i picked all the lines we’d be here forever.)

“Everybody knows this place is dying, as am I.” Something about Midas dying as the Worldport does - decaying and falling with their realm. Something about the season 2 reset showing the world *literally* dying, falling apart, crumbling and everyone *knowing* it.

“I might not get another chance.” Midas switching Haley and Fable - they *knew* they probably weren't going to get another chance to try and stop Fable like that. As well as the whole idea of the grove only having one chance to open the portal - they, Icarus especially as the one who *put* Perix's soul in the frame, fully thought this was their *only* opportunity to get Fable out. Obviously this is proven wrong in season 3 - but they didn't *know that.*

“I am such a fuckup, if you only knew that I am such a fuck up.” Something about Icarus seeing themself as a failure - a fuckup. They couldn't even get their father out correctly, why can't everyone just see how much of a failure they are? Why can't everyone see how much they ruin everything they touch? (And, arguably, Midas as well. That whole idea of them failing in their duties to bring Icarus when they were supposed to, leading to so so *so* many worlds decaying.)

“And I am the worst mistake that God has ever made.” Sort of that same idea as the last one - that idea of Icarus seeing themself as a failure. Only this time it's more related to their Dad than themself. He made them, they're *his* child - therefore, if they see themself *that* badly, they're the worst mistake he's ever made. They're a terrible fucking person and they're a *failure.*

“But I make lemons out of lemonade.” Wack wack wack wack. This line is so very about the wack. Something about changing things from one thing to another in a way that *shouldn't be possible.*

“In your guts you know it's all destroyed.” Okay, Midas to Fable. Something about Fable knowing that this world is dying - something about how Fable would *know* the outcome of doing all of this. He would know that Rae would figure it out one day, the cause of the resets, and it wouldn't go *well* - that his relationship with one or both of his sons would be destroyed. (Also, mayhaps, Midas to Icarus - that whole idea that the world is destroyed and their chance at getting Fable out (at least this time) is *also* destroyed.)

“None of us belong, Everything I do is wrong.” Something about everyone being pulled into the resets from different time periods, being shifted and tugged and placed into the present but not quite *belonging* there. Something about how Icarus tries their very hardest to be *good* - but so much of what they do ends up being wrong on so many levels. (But it's all they know.) Something about how Midas tries their very best to fix and fix and *fix* and they can't really - it almost always ends up *wrong.*

“And in your blood you know what's right.” Midas to Icarus - that whole idea that Icarus has Fable's blood running through their veins, that they believe that he is *right.* Even if in the moment they don't know him well, don't remember him well, they still subconsciously think what they're doing that mirrors Fable's own actions is *right.*

Could also be Midas to Fable? That might be a slippery slope to climb and explain though.

“And in your bones you know what's wrong.” Midas to Icarus - something about Icarus so often knowing, but not *acknowledging*, that what they're doing is wrong. Icarus *knows* it's wrong, deep in their bones, they really really do. (But rarely do they acknowledge that.)

Could *also* be Midas to Fable for similar reasons.

“And in your throat you know you're lying to kids” Midas to Fable - While they're not *literally* kids and children still, they are *his* kids - and he's lying to them. Fable is lying to his kids and he *knows* it, not that he'll acknowledge that ever.

“And you know nobody belongs in this hell.” Midas to Fable - Something about Fable *knowing* none of them belong in this hell of resets and everything; that he should probably just let life run its course, let it go as it *should* - but he doesn't. And he's dooming them to this hell none of them belong in. (And he knows they don't.)

“I am God's worst Mistake” Just. Icarus. Once again just that whole idea that they just think of themself as a *failure* - especially after the portal glitches. They can't keep doing this - at some point they're just. A mistake. (Arguably, could also be seen directed more at Quixis as well - the way Quixis made them like this with the eye and all.)

“And you seem happy on the knife's edge, but I just lick the blade.” Midas to Fable - That idea that Fable kind of hovers on the knife's edge, but never tips over it. He tows a line, about to tetter over. The way Midas will *gladly* tip over that line - lick the blade, on this case - they'll go down, tetter over that edge, but they sure as fuck won't do it quietly or unnoticeable.

“And I'm the worst mistake your God has ever made.” Arguably, Midas to Icarus. Fable is the reason they couldn't get to Icarus - Fable is the reason they're *like this.* And, *arguably,* Fable is kind of sort of Icarus’ God. Also just that whole idea that Fable is the reason for *so much* between Midas and Fable. And now Midas is *angry.* Mistake in this case isn't a bad thing - mistake in this case is more “Midas is about to make their anger *very* much Fable's problem - and it's his fault.”

“Invisible hand savior, fucking up your definitions even though it's life or death.” Midas to Fable - Fable is, in this case, the invisible hand. He saves Icarus every *single* reset - he *is* the savior, and he's fucking up definitions *every* time he does it. Even though it's life or death, even though Icarus absolutely *should* die, they should be dead, they're not. He's literally fucking up definitions everytime he rips a page out or edits or does *anything* to As It Is.

“Don't you think it matters when we wish our friends the best.” Midas to Fable - again. Something about Fable wishing Rae and Co good luck on figuring out what the resets were being caused by - when *he* was the one causing them. It *should* matter that he wished them luck, but it really doesn't considering he *knew.*

“Because of all this bullshit I'm not anything at all.” Midas in general really - something about how they're just trying to fix everything now, but they're not really a person anymore. They're alone and they're almost a god and they're *angry.*

“There's nothing to believe in and there won't be ‘till we fall” Okay this line goes *far* deeper into the finale and things than it should. This is Midas talking to Fable but for once they're not being an *asshole* - they're lumping themself in with him. Something about Fable dying at the end of Fable, and Midas passing their torch (metaphorically falling/dying), and the way it leaves room for new gods - new gods people will actually *like* and believe in and won't cause harm and and and. Something about Midas knowing that until both of them are gone, no one is going to properly believe for a *while.*

“I can't get the numbers right - I can't fucking count because not one goddamn thing is in it's place.” Midas to Icarus *or* Vice versa (Icarus to Midas). Something about the wack changing and altering so so *so* much neither of them are really them anymore. Nothing is like it should be, and it hasn't been for a while. The Worldport is decaying, soon Midas will be too. Icarus isn't themself - they haven't been in a *while.* The eye isn't theirs (not that they *know* that), all of the purple isn't theirs, some of their members *aren't theirs.* Nothing is in it's place and that's *really* fucking shit up.

“You fuckers know it's all built on lies” Midas to *both* Icarus and Fable. Just that whole idea of how Fable manipulates and abuses in the way he does; twisting words and fabricating truths, lies laid with the grounds of a truth, but built on things objectively very false. And in Icarus’ case - their entire life and personality is a lie. They act so very differently alone than they do around others, it's all a front. Everything they've built to this point, and *so much* of what they'll build as season 3 starts is built on lies and half truths. (And that whole idea that Midas is *angry* at them.)

“But the beast refuses to die, and so I guess well neither can I.” This line *arguably* also leans very heavily into finale territory - mostly with things we know after the fact though. Just that whole idea that Fable can't die, he refuses to - as long as he's immortal he *can't.* And if Fable is alive, and actively keeping Midas from Icarus - then Midas can't pass the torch, Midas can't *die.* Something about how Midas fully thought they were going to die upon passing the torch to Icarus. If Fable refuses to die, meaning they can't reach Icarus, then Midas *can't* die. (Because what happens then? The Worldport is left without an overseer and wack gets hundreds of times worse? *No* that can't happen. So they power through it to let Icarus see the end.)

[Section Five - You died. Deal with the consequences, Icarus. (Season 3)]

-> [Is There Anybody Here?]

-> The season 3 break my beloved honestly. That's this song in a very very loose nutshell. The season 3 break - both their time in the Worldport as well as their time here. Just that whole idea of trying to find Quixis - and then trying to find *something* that they know and can hold onto. That idea of looking for something, anything, anyone that can help them because they *don't know where they are.* That idea that they're trying to find their way back home, and are struggling because they don't know how.

-> [Maybe Man]

-> Very much that whole mentality Icarus has early season 3. That idea that they *don't* know how they are, not anymore. They're just kind of. Floating. Also that whole idea of trying to figure out who the fuck they even want to be in the first place. They don't really have a direction - they just want to be *something.* (Something that will please people, make them smile whenever Icarus passes by because they're doing *good.*)

-> [Chasing You]

-> That whole idea of how Icarus has spent the past *year* trying to bring Haley back, trying to figure out how to see her and fix their mistake - and that whole idea that now that she's back, now that Midas brought her back, Icarus doesn't know what to do. Icarus doesn't know how to act around her, what they can and cannot and should and should not say/voice, what is too far over a line and what isn't. They're really just left floating not knowing what in the *world* they should do about it.

-> [The Garden]

-> The whole idea of Icarus getting so done with and so incredibly over Quixis and the wack and the changes and *us.* The whole idea of wanting to dig them up and out and remove them completely, no matter the consequence, no matter where it would get them in the end. The whole idea of how Midas knows their name - and we have to figure it out - and the way they don’t, and the way, more often than not, we as chat snark at them and are very passive aggressive sometimes, rather than being helpful - and how they don’t like that.

-> [New Eyes]

-> Two samples Two samples Two samples. Just, Icarus about the eyes in general. The finding put that the purple eye's blood *isn't theirs*, and the following realization that if the blood isn't theirs, then the eye itself isn't theirs either. That want and that need for people - Midas - to stop changing them, to give them *their* eye back - so they can see with new ones; so they can see with the eyes that were always *supposed* to be theirs. (Also just the general idea of needing to see things through a new lens, see things better, because they're suffering and hurting and *no one* seems to see it, and how one day that fact might kill them. (And well, it does, doesn't it?))

-> Sage and their ability to be so normal got this one on the playlist. We win these.

-> [The Tornado]

-> So very Unlocked - this *is* the Unlocked song. That whole idea of them being used to the wack, being almost surprised as it just *kept getting worse*, *the wings,* the running to the bunker and the *yelling* at Midas, Fable finding them, and - arguably - the aftermath of the wings and those few streams following Unlocked where they were just trying to heal and fix and *clean* up the path they had made. (Okay yes Quixis ascension, yes, but we’re not at that part in the playlist yet - so.) And, well. Some more detailed line analysis because I’m a loser.

“It was just startin' to drizzle as I walked out the door, But I've delivered papers in the rain like that before.” Just that whole idea that the wack being weird - being worse, changing their house more than normal, changing *them* and their clothes more than normal - was okay, in their mind. What’s the worst that can happen? It’s done this before, and everything was fine for both them and others - why worry about it this time?

“3:30 in the morning, I was happy as a lark.” That idea that Icarus was so very happy to get Fable out. They were so happy and excited, because this was what they had been working to for months and years and *resets* and they had finally been able to do it. They might’ve been a little worried, but they were mostly *happy.*

“The wind was pickin' up and howlin' louder all the time.” The redstone beginning as they were all standing in front of the now open portal - the way they weren’t expecting it, the way it just kept picking up and getting *worse* no matter what they did to stop it.

“The sky churned like a cauldron and the distant thunder roared, And I knew that I was in for quite a storm.” The redstone picking up, but also the fact Fable hadn’t come out yet - and they had been waiting and waiting for the others to get him for *minutes* now and it was beginning to worry everyone outside of the portal; that idea that they *knew* something might be up - with Fable or the wack.

“A little rain never hurt no one, so I kept pressin' on.” Up to this point, the wack hadn’t hurt *anyone* - well, with the exception of Icarus themself. Sure it had hurt and changed and wacked animals and blocks and all that - but never Icarus’ friends and family. It hurt them time and time again - but they were fine after all of it (for the most part - with the exception of the many breakdowns and *the eye*), why should they worry about others getting hurt? It had never *severely* hurt them like that; so they kept going and standing there and letting it get worse upon that assumption that it *wouldn’t do that.*

“And I tried to tell myself it's always darkest before the dawn.” Just that way they were so desperately trying to convince themself that it was all okay - that the group in Purgatory *will* bring Fable out and it’ll be okay. The wack will be fine and it’ll stop and it’s just a small little bad thing before they get Fable back - that desperate way they try to convince themself it’ll be okay.

“Lightning struck an oak tree as I leapt off my bike.” The way the redstone, the *bad* just keeps getting worse and worse as time goes on. Regardless of what they do it gets worse and they can’t seem to *stop it.*

“The sirens started wailing, but there was no good place to hide.” That whole idea that Icarus really, really, *really* wanted to run - they wanted their dad and they wanted the wack to *stop* because it just kept getting worse and they really, really wanted to just run. But they knew they column’t because running would make things so so much worse - so they don’t run, they just stand there and let it keep getting *worse.*

“I knew without a doubt there was a twister touchin' down.” That idea that they *knew* it was only going to get worse and worse the longer they stood there, without a doubt, but there wasn’t anything they could *do about it* - they just had to power through whatever happens, like they always do.

“The little bit of courage I had left was almost gone.” Something about how at the beginning of Unlocked they were mostly okay - that had *some* bits of courage - but the longer no one came out of the portal and the longer all the redstone did was get bigger, and the longer they just *stood there* the more that courage just. faded.

“And then the nightmare started, it got deafeningly loud.” Momboo. The redstone getting bigger and the wack *hurting her* (hurting someone other than Icarus, for once) and the way they almost *immediately* panicked and ran (or, at least tried to) off. And then like the following moments of running and running and trying to fly and then their wings *shattering.*

“Every fiber in me screamed out, but I couldn't make a sound.” Something about how they screamed as their wings broke, but about how their panic after the fact was so very quiet. They weren't screaming - they were just hurt and in pain and weren't going well but were trying so desperately to keep it under wraps. They refused to let themself break at *any* point during the run to the bunker, refused to let themself fall apart like that. They wouldn't - they *couldn't.*

“It sounded like a freight train was draggin' me to hell.” Something about the particular way the the wings sounded when they shattered - so *loud* and overwhelming as they crystalized and as Icarus *fell.* Even louder as they shattered against their own weight and Icarus’ back. They dragged Icarus *down.* (Metaphorically dragging Icarus to hell, I suppose.)

“And this was my prayer, "Save me from this terrible nightmare"” *Icarus yelling at Midas.* This line is os Icarus yelling at Midas, both on their way and inside of the bunker. They just wanted Quixis to *stop*, to know why they just kept *doing all of this* to Icarus and their friends. -They just wanted Quixis to stop, and they just wanted someone to be there for them and save them because *gods* they hurt so very badly.

“That was when I saw my family with my eyes shut real tight.” Fable showing up at the bottom of the bunker - they literally see their family. Also something about how they just wanted this to stop - their eyes shut and the denial of the past delays creeping back up on them.

“Would they know how much I loved them if this was how I died?” *Would they?* How many times does Icarus tell their family they love them? (How many times do people tell *them* that?) Would their family know just how much Icarus loved and cared about them if Icarus died - if they died like *this* with no one around?

“No, I vowed I'd not be murdered by a monster in the sky that night.” If you think about it - this injury could’ve killed them. It didn’t - and they definitely didn't want them to - but it *could’ve.* But they wanted to so desperately survive and live and *not* let Midas’ actions get the better of them - they vowed it wouldn’t happen.

“But if I went home to heaven, at least that's where I'd belong.” Midas’ would’ve pulled them before they died (just like they did in the finale) if the injury *did* kill them - they would’ve been where they belong because they were meant to become Quixis *decades* ago; that, the worldport, Quixis, was supposed to be their home for years yet it *wasn’t* - it's where they belong but, at this moment, they’re not there.

“There was nothin' but destruction and wreckage in that town.” The mess the path and wack made; the redstone in front of the portal; *the tree.* (Their wings.) It was all a mess and destroyed and, for at least some of that - there was no fixing it. It was just destroyed and they just had to deal with that.

“And that was how I learned to live when you can run, but you can't hide.” They could run from hurting Momboo, and they could run from the wack, and they could run from their wings breaking - but they can’t *hide from it.* They have to deal with the consequences of their actions, they can’t hide from it. They have to see the tree - see their mistakes, see their bad - nearly everyday. They can run from it, sure, but they can’t *hide.*

“How to feel trapped in a tunnel but come out the other side.” They’re trapped and grounded and alone (somewhat - Fable is doing his whole “isolate his kid so they lose attachments” thing) but they come out of it, eventually. They get their wings back, they can fly again - they may have felt trapped for a time but they *made it out.*

“'Cause with all the stormy weather in the world, you learn to take life one storm at a time.” Pulling out the character analysis card - Icarus gets very focused on *one* (big) thing very easily. Their wings, they wanted to fix those - spent weeks trying to get better; Enderian talking to Rae - they were so incredibly stuck on that until they made up; And, the more obvious one from season 3 - Centross. It was a 5 month long storm - but it’s all they focused on. They take their life, especially during season 3, one big problem and thing at a time - focus on *it* and nothing else. (Because focusing on other things means acknowledging just how much you’re hurting, and they can’t do that.) And I mean, it gets Icarus through. They make it to the end going like that. It’s not healthy - but they *make it.*

“I keep hangin' on.” No matter what happens, no matter how close to death they get and no matter how much death would probably be kinder at a point, Icarus is still there. They keep hanging on - keep living and keep just, going through the motions.

-> [Birds]

-> Just that whole idea of how after Unlocked (and arguably also *during* Unlocked) Icarus just wanted to *relax.* They were done and hurting and upset and they just really, really wanted to sit, alone, with the flock. They just want to be calm and relax and not have to think about any of what just happened.

-> [Look Who's Inside Again]

-> Unlocked. Probably Midas to Icarus? Or just someone outside looking in at Icarus in the moment after their wings break. This song specifically being more about Icarus’ desperation to get to their bunker - and their feelings while inside of it. How this is just like the prison - putting themself into a box, a prison, a *room*, to keep people safe. To keep them from hurting people. They're back here again - trapped in a box with no way of getting out until someone comes to get them, yelling at the person who (for all intents and purposes) put them there. They're back here again, *inside* again.

-> The whole idea of Fable, after he gets out, beginning to isolate and cage Icarus - with the guise of keeping them safe. He’s removing them from their friends and family and leaving *him* as the only person Icarus can safely - at least in their mind - rely on.

-> I have further words about Fable and Icarus in regards to this song, and that’s really tying into the “again” aspect of this. Viewing this through the lens that this is Fable isolating Icarus, and the visions of a child shown throughout this song, then it’s not terribly hard to come to the idea that this probably isn’t the first time Fable did this - isolate and cage and manipulate - Icarus. That whole idea that his manipulation and abuse has been going on for much longer than we see on screen - this isn’t a new thing. He did this before and he’s doing it again and Icarus just has to deal with that. (Even if they don’t *know* he did this when they were a child. They don’t remember any of that aspect of themself.)

-> [Let Me Make You Proud]

-> That whole idea that yes, Icarus has failed and made mistakes and disappointed Fable - probably time and time and *time* again - but that they really, really, *really* want to make it up to him. They want to make him proud because they feel so much like a failure after everything that keeps happening - they want to make all their mistakes and missteps up to him. They want to make it up to him and they keep trying and trying and *trying* to do that. (And, arguably, failing at it rather often.)

-> [the fruits]

-> The whole idea of how Icarus wants so desperately to help Fable and all he’s doing, but the idea of how Fable can’t see that they’re not entirely them - can’t see just how much they can keep falling and repeating history and just how badly they’re doing. The whole idea that they can’t help him - they can be the person he wants them to be and the person he’s trying to make them into because they’re not entirely themself in the whole sense of them; they can’t be that if they’re not entirely themself - they can’t help him like he wants them to, and how they spiral because of that.

-> [Loser Baby]

-> Centross and Icarus. Kind of to each other. This song is. So *incredibly* drinking stream coded. Just. That realization of just how similar the two of them are, just how much they have in common, just how much they're both going through the same shitty situation. That realization that they can *rely* on eachother. The realization of how they're so so *incredibly* similar - especially in regards to Enderian and Fable - and how they're both losers, they're both having a bad bad time, but they can do it together. (Which, arguably, they’ve known for a while - but it becomes a lot clearer in the drinking stream; especially with Icarus calling Centross their best friend.)

-> [Down the River]

-> *Breaking Bonds* - This song is very Athena to Icarus. The whole idea that Icarus likes to run and hide and leave the past and everything they’ve done behind and not acknowledge it whatsoever - How they can’t do that; How even if Icarus wants to forget and leave and run, others aren’t going to do that for them - Others are still going to remember all of this and all they’ve done, and what happens to them, the grove, once Icarus leaves and decides to ignore it. What happens then? What happens to all those people you’ve hurt?

-> [Hero]

-> Centross’ death. That way Icarus just spends that immediate moment after him fading just trying to convince themself it's *okay.* They're okay and he's okay and he'll be *back* and it's okay. Them just trying to convince themself it's alright and trying so so desperately to comfort themself in this hell. Arguably, also almost their anger at Fable for killing their best friend - that immediate sharp anger and bared teeth (“I'm the hero of the story, don't need to be saved.” Just that whole idea that Centross saved them - but he shouldn't have had to. They were the *hero* of this story, no one should have to save them - and no one should have to *die* doing that if they even tried. Icarus’ whole thing is trying to save themself, figure out ways they can fix it *themself.* No one should have to die because Icarus couldn’t do that. They’re a prince, they’re supposed to be alone. People shouldn’t have to die because they weren’t.)

-> [Can't Catch Me Now]

-> Centross almost like. Taunting Fable and trying to comfort Icarus. How he's always going to be there for Icarus, he's always watching over them, even if he can't tell them and show them that physically, he is *there.* But also almost taunting Fable in regards to the fact that Fable can't catch him now; Fable will not find him no matter what he tries and attempts, he will see Centross everywhere, be reminded of him just like Icarus is, and he *will not* find him - and won't be able to bring him back.

-> [Do What You Gotta Do]

-> This that short bit after Fable kills Centross where Icarus just *yells* at Fable. That snark, that anger that Fable *did that* - and Fable's argument that he “did what he had to”, and that was *necessary*; Fable did this (killed Centross) because he had too, Icarus should hear him out. Just that whole conversation between Icarus and Fable after he kills Centross, and that whole falling out between the two of them, and that whole slow manipulation from Fable's end as the conversation continued. (Also Fable's whole “being a god” thing-)

-> [The Cave]

-> Centross to Icarus after the cathedral. How he *will* be there for them, no matter what, but also how he has other duties to attend to - but also also how he can't stick around due to the fact that Fable is currently killing every God in his sight, taking every power for himself. How Centross *wants* Icarus to know he's there for them, but also how he can't physically be there. He'll try his *hardest* to keep them alive - try his hardest to keep them going until the end.

-> [Paid in Exposure]

-> Very much Coworkers - just that whole idea of doing only what they're told and becoming, a, a coworker, and b, one of the bad guys - or the people on the stereotypically “bad” side.

-> [Natural]

-> *Also* Coworkers. That whole idea that for them to be on this side of this war they have to be assholes - they have to be cold and sharp and not care, and the whole idea that they're *good at it.* The idea that all three of them are good at that - they're almost naturals at it. They don't have to practice because they can settle into that role far, far too easily. (Also “Rather be the hunter than the prey” is incredibly Coworkers - because they all know that Fable is hunting gods and hunting people down, and they'd rather be beside him as he does that than cowering beneath his sword.)

-> [Burning Pile]

-> Just like the whole idea of wanting to put all your problems in a big pile and just light them up and on fire - kill them, get rid of them, ignore them. That whole idea of wanting to get rid of all your current problems, all the shitty stuff you’ve gone through, get rid of it all and never properly look back - you’ve burnt it, it’s gone, you don’t have to think about it anymore. (Or, that’s the dream at least. Not really what ends up happening in the end.)

-> [Can't Go Back]

-> Just that whole idea that Icarus should forgive themself - how most of this isn't really *their* fault, and how they should be learning to forgive themself for that - not blame themself for stuff that isn't their fault. (Also the whole idea that none of this is *fair* - it's not fair to them and nor fair for Fable and not fair to *anyone* in the grove.)

-> This definitely feels like Violet trying his absolute hardest to comfort Icarus the best he can even though he can’t physically be there with them in the moment (and he won’t be able to be for a while. (And even when he was able to be there for him, at the end, it wasn’t for very long.)

-> [Try To Change]

-> How Icarus just keeps trying to change, change and change and change, they're trying so incredibly hard, and it just keeps failing. The whole idea that they can’t find it in themself to change - there's safety in it, they’ve always been like this, why wouldn’t they just keep going and being like this. Why would they try - there is *no* point to it. They’re safe like this, Dad likes them like this, why would they change into something he wouldn’t?

-> [Let Us All Down]

-> Just that whole idea of how the Grove feels about Icarus working with Fable. Arguably, they all thought Icarus could be good - they gave Icarus so so *so* many chances, they didn't think that they'd go this route. They didn't think they'd be involved in Centross’ death like this and this didn't think and and and. (Also, arguably, Icarus spiraling. Just *thinking* about what people would say, what people would think, what they would *feel*, how they would react.)

-> Arguably kinda sorta maybe Two Shall Break/Two Shall Mourn for the priorly explained reasons.

-> [Lima Bean Man]

-> Icarus about Momboo. Icarus so *desperately* wants Momboo to not be dead, so desperately wants to be able to bring her back. Not necessarily telling themself she *isn't* dead, but that she *can't* be - because that means they killed another person, that means they did it *again.*

-> [Shots]

-> Icarus to. Everyone basically. They're so so *sorry* - they're breaking down crying near everyday by this point, and they just keep *killing people.* (“why do I kill everything that I love?”) and they're so so *sorry.* But also that they need everyone to know they're *in too deep* - People aren't going to be able to save them now, not through normal means. It's not going to happen - they need to let Icarus drift away because if they *don't*? More people will only get hurt.

-> While I won’t elaborate on this statement, as it speaks for itself, your friendly reminder that Icarus did not truly hate their father when they killed him - Icarus still held some sort of semblance of love for him, even at the end, even after everything, even as they stabbed that trident into his chest as he revealed he was never going to bring Centross back.

-> [Prodigal]

-> That whole idea that where Icarus is right now is all their own fault. They caused it, it's their fault, and there's nothing they can really do about it. They're alone, they've dug themself a hole and fallen down it (because that's all they do, really) and they can't get out - and it's their fault. It's all their fault - it always *is* their fault.

-> [Solitary Confinement]

-> They're alone! After Momboo, and after their conversation with Athena, they're *alone* - Confined. And they're. Okay with it, almost. They wanted to push people away, wanted to be alone, because it makes all of this so so much easier. But they *really* wish they didn't have to do it. Didn't have to push people away like that, didn't *have* to do this to everyone and themself. They do it, yes, because in the end it will benefit them to do so, but they really really don't like doing it - they're spiraling. (And really, they have been for months.)

-> a “devious read” by yours truly according to the sherbertquake56

-> [No Longer You]

-> Okay. Now. What I'm about to say *might* sound like. horribly wrong because everyone kind of looks at this and goes “oh the prophet is Haley” and to that I say. Nope. No, the prophet is Midas. This song is *Midas* talking to Icarus about their future - regardless of how this goes. Because Midas would know what would happen after they “Draw their final breath” so to speak - Midas would know. Haley wouldn't. Also, because I'm a little loser, and the fact this song *really* lends itself to this, line by line analysis.

“I see a song of past romance” Perhaps talking about Momboo? This line could be very ambiguous. Cause you could also argue Wet Birds, but I'm not sure that really *fits.* (If you wanted to go the Prison Duo route, you probably could as well.)

“I see the sacrifice of man.” This line being about Centross - Sacrificing himself to save both Icarus, as well as the rest of his family.

“I see portrayals of betrayal,” This line being about Jamie - Betraying the family they *had* for the family they *want.*

“And a brother's final stand.” This is. Just the ‘A Brother's Final Stand’ stream. Rae trying so so *so* hard to save his brother, and failing because they *just* don't *want* (don't think they need, don't think they deserve) help.

“I see you on the brink of death.” Icarus after they kill Fable. Or, really, Icarus throughout the last week-ish; throughout that they're on the brink of death, they're *dying.* (They have been for almost 5 months - but after he dies Icarus is left so much worse off because Fable isn’t around and alive to keep Quixis’ powers at bay.)

“I see you draw your final breath.” Them *jumping* - Them thinking they were going to die. Them being fully fully accepting of it.

“I see a man who gets to make it home alive.” Midas pulling Icarus into the Worldport, *alive* - telling them that they'll be able to go back home eventually.

“But it's no longer you…” But the person Icarus would become after all that time in the Worldport, after leaving it, would be starkly different to the person that entered it - that it wouldn't really be Icarus anymore. It'd be Icarus, of course, but they'd know and have been changed that they wouldn't be the Icarus they *were.*

Just. It really encompasses those last few months of Icarus’ life before becoming Quixis - those last few months of pain and desperation and *bad.*

-> [Monster]

-> The whole idea of how Icarus *will* be the monster if they have to. They'll kill and slaughter and murder and *be* the monster if it means they'll all make to end - if it means they'll get to bring everyone back, *fix* everything.

-> [No Children]

-> This is very much Icarus’ mentality at the end - about Fable and about Rae and about *everyone.* That idea that they don't want to be saved anymore, not like this. That idea that if they have to go down - they're going to take Fable with them. That idea that they just want Rae and *everyone* to give up on them - and, arguably, that idea that if *they* die, they want Fable to come down with them. Uh. Well here's another set of far more detailed line analysis <3 Not the last one either <3

“I hope that our few remaining friends give up on trying to save us.” That whole idea that Icarus doesn’t want to be saved - not like this. They don’t want to and they don't think they’re deserving of it - they fully hope that Rae gives up on trying to save them.

“I hope we come up with a fail-safe plot to piss off the dumb few that forgave us.” While they didn’t *know* it’d be fail-safe, Jamie. Because by this point there were *very* few people still trying to save and help them - and really, to their knowledge, it was *just* Rae - and to them? To those people *that* was the tipping point. For that last week they were left completely alone because they had *finally* pissed off the people trying to save them.

“I hope the fences we mended fall down beneath their own weight.” Very similarly to that previous line, during Family Reunion - arguably - Rae and Icarus had *kind of* mended their relationship. Icarus didn’t like that - Icarus really hoped that he’d just let it go. They really hoped that the weight of everything would mean their relationship, whatever Rae thought was left of it - at least, would just crumble. That Icarus wouldn’t have to hold on to him and their family anymore because holding onto it means there is *complications* and attachments and they really can't have that - not now.

“And I hope we hang on past the last exit. I hope it's already too late.” That whole idea that Icarus was in too deep - Icarus was going to hold on and stay attached to Fable until the very, very, *very* end. That whole idea that Icarus very much thought, very much hoped, that they were too far gone and it was far, *far* too late to turn back now. (Also that whole idea that

“In my life, I hope I lie. And tell everyone you were a good wife.” Okay, a, that whole idea that Icarus lies about *nearly* everything - they lie about so, so, *so* much that it’s really all they do and hope to do. B, that idea that they so desperately want to see their father as a good person - so desperately want *everyone else* to think he’s a good person; to the point that they *will* lie about it, they hope to, they hope they get the opportunity to lie about it.

“And I hope you die. I hope we both die.” *If he dies they don’t have to do this anymore.* Just that whole idea that if he dies they do not, really and truly, have to continue to do any of this. They can fully and completely leave it behind and *gods* how they really, really want to do that. Also, arguably, that whole idea that they don’t think they’re worth saving, and that whole idea that they think they fuck everything up and ruin it regardless of how much they’re trying. If they both die between now and the end, then when this is all over no one will have to get hurt anymore - their family will be *safe* and sound and they won’t have to stress about themself *or* their family *or* what their father is doing.

“I hope I cut myself shaving tomorrow. I hope it bleeds all day long.” That idea that icarus thinks they’re deserving of all the hurt and pain and sorrow sent their way. All this pain and suffering and the way it’s constant - they fully, *fully* think they’re deserving of it; they fully hope it keeps happening solely to prove that point. (This is not the time or place to go on a rant - but I would like to bring up how, after Centross dies, whenever Icarus gets really injured - unless it's dire dire - they refuse to use potions on themself. And even when it *is* dire they’re almost hesitant about it.)

“Our friends say it's darkest before the sun rises; we're pretty sure they're all wrong.” Rae thinking he can save Icarus, save them despite everything they’ve done and despite all they’ve been through - and Icarus thinking, *knowing*, he can’t. Regardless of what he says, Icarus knows they’re in too deep and knows that means Rae can’t save them or get through to them very easily.

“I hope the worst isn't over.” Ties back to the line before last - that idea that Icarus thinks they deserve all the pain and suffering they’re going through. It’s their fault, they deserve it, maybe they don’t really like it very much by they do understand where its coming from and they can agree with it because deep down they *know* what they’re doing is so very very wrong.

“I am drowning. There is no sign of land.” They’re falling and falling deeper into this little pit they’ve dug themself and they can’t find a hand hold to even start trying to climb themself out. They are lost and *alone* with no one there to help and they *know it.*

“You are coming down with me, hand in unlovable hand.” That idea that if Icarus goes down - they’ll take, to try to take, Fable with them. That idea that both themself and Fable are seemingly unlovable - at least in Icarus’ eyes - and the two of them would go down hand in hand; it’ll be one of their faults and they’d drag the other down with them (Also, arguably, Icarus and Midas as well - if Icarus goes down they want to drag Midas down with them; if Midas goes down they’ll inevitably *have* to drag Icarus down with them. The two of them are so intertwined that if one goes down they’ll drag the other whether they want to or not.)

-> [Mr. Author]

-> How Icarus really just wants this to all *stop* and finish up - how it's been going on for so long and they don't know how much longer they can keep going like this. How they want to talk to the person who wrote their story like this - talk to the person that keeps *letting them do this*, want to talk to the author ruining their life.

-> [Icarus]

-> Something about Fable realizing, however small, that his actions are hurting Icarus. How Icarus is hurting and dying, and how he can't *fix it* - he's not going to be able to fix it, fix *them*, make them what he wants them to be. He can't save them in the way he wants to - they're *going* to die and gods he won't be able to stop it. Specifically right at the end, Fable's death by his own son's hands.

-> [The Bad Guy]

-> That whole idea that all Icarus wanted to do, really and truly, was *fix* everything - but that's not how it went. They went to bad places to fix things, they became the bad guy. They didn't want to be, of course - not again, not after last time - but that's what *happened.* They became the bad guy, and they're finally finally realizing it. (Only, it's really too late, because they're dying now.)

-> [In My Blood]

-> Just that whole idea that this is how Icarus is always going to be, how this is how Icarus is and there's no changing it - how it's in their blood to do this, to *be like* this - how there's no stopping it, no turning back.

-> [Daniel In The Den]

-> Really just that whole idea of Icarus killing Fable, and the following way they attempt to move on. That way Fable was killed by “the ones you think you love” - Icarus, yes, but really everyone contributed. (And, arguably, almost that bit of anger Icarus harbors toward Fable at the end - that idea he wasn't ever going to fix this; that all this pain and suffering was for *nothing.*)

[Section Six - They're. Kind of God now. Question mark. Maybe. I dunno, Icarixis is. Yeah. They're a guy. That's for sure.]

-> [Ruin]

-> They have a conversation. This is simply Midas and Icarus having a back and forth conversation about mistakes and Quixis and *all of it.* It’s very hard to summarize - so uh. Hi line by line analysis, welcome back-

(ICARUS)

“I will bring you ruin in everything I do.” Something about how no matter what Icraus does and no matter how hard they try - they ruin things. Their family, their house, their friends house, their *life.* They bring the people in their life - including Midas, and including themself - ruin and pain no matter what they do.

“It’s never my intention, but it happens all the same.” Icarus rarely means to hurt their family and friends like that - it’s rarely their intention but it *happens.* They can’t stop it happening, be it because of the wack or because they’re trying to *fix something* or or or. They never mean to hurt people - they don’t *like* hurting people - but it just keeps happening and happening and *happening.*

“It starts with love and comfort, becomes a strength of will.” Arguably, talking about their time in the three resets they remember. It started good and okay and alright and it just slowly became their goal to just *survive* - it became a strength of will to just keep going after every little thing that just kept *happening;* After all the death and harm and suffering they’d experience they had to fight to keep going.

“But all that strength made rubble of the towers we built.” Icarus keeping going like they did broke *so much.* The Worldport, Midas, Themself, *The overworld.* It all fell apart, was all unstable, because of *them* - all of that kept falling apart into rubble because of *them.* (And, arguably, also partially because of Midas.)

“Cause brick by brick, you built us and I’d fill in the cracks.” Midas helped build this world, this *life* for Icarus. They built it brick by brick - keeping Icarus from being Quixis so young gave them *this* - a family, a life, safety. Midas built it, and Icarus made it *theirs.*

“Nothing quite prepares you for when they don’t come back.” Icarus wasn't prepared for when Centross didn't come back - when it wasn't just a fluke. They weren't prepared for being *alone* and by themself for that long and they weren't prepared for him just being. Dead.

“I wish I’d done things different, I wish that I’d been brave.” Something about wishing they'd home about getting Centross back differently - not killing people, not doing any of that. Something about wanting to be braver - be braver to leave Him and side with their brother and the rest of their family and not side with the person who killed Centross and who killed so many people. Something about *wanting that.*

“I wish I’d known these stones were something I could save.” Arguably, something about wishing to have known that they could have saved Midas so much earlier - could've taken up their role *months* (*years*) ago and saved Midas so much pain and bad and suffering.

(MIDAS)

“Our mortar was your laughter.” Something about the funnier aspects of Midas changing things - it kept them together. At least for a little bit. It kept everything okay and alright - the silly-ness of it all. (Obviously that didn’t stick very long.)

“And you hurled curses at the land.” Icarus yelling and ranting and being so *angry* at Midas. That anger that Icarus just let boil simmering over whenever something bad or upsetting or just *annoying* happened.

“We didn’t talk, we made universes - out of bitten lips and broken hands.” Something about how Icarus and MIdas never talked talked - sure they had the book and their comms but they never really properly *talked.* Something about how despite that, they built things through their pain and hurt. They built friendships and lives and all of that - even without talking.

“You said, “I love you less than when it all began.”” When it first started Icraus didn’t think anything of it - wanted to know what was up with it but also wasn’t really *worried.* Icarus, at the beginning, almost thought it slightly funny. They didn’t really care what it did. But as time went on and as Midas lost more and more control and as the wack got worse and worse and as it broke more and more - the less and less Icarus liked it. It lost its novelty once it started hurting people.

“And I said fewer cause I make jokes to show how broken I really am.” Something about Midas communicating very *directly* with the wack and their comm and things as the end came closer and closer - they stopped with the messing around and the jokes and the silly changes they used to do, and they just became serious calls for help on both ends. (And beyond the direct communication - the *interfering* with things that could get Icraus hurt or killed.) Gone are the jokes and the small silly laughable changes, replaced with calls for help and calls for *something* because Midas was dying and so was the Worldport. And something about how the direct communication was a lot more spread apart in comparison to Midas’ jokes.

“And in the wreck of all we burnt, stands our piano like a wound.” Something about how in the wreck of everything Midas has done, and everything Icarus has done - The two of them still stand tall, *alive.* And something about how so does the Worldport - despite all the decay and all the things it's been through, it's still alive and it's still going and it's still holding all the worlds and it's slowly getting fixed and and and.

“I’ll play our song to see if it’s in tune.” Arguably, something about letting Icarus see to the end of their story. Letting the song play rather than stopping it far far too early - letting Icarus live and learn and seeing if they’ll make the correct choice; seeing if the song is in tune.

“And I promise to be patient.” Something about how Midas kept *going* - no matter what happened and no matter how much it seemed like Icarus was too far gone and no matter how much it seemed like Icarus wasn’t going to make the right choice, Midas persisted. They were so patient with them - waiting and waiting and *waiting* until Icarus *did it.*

“And you promise to be kind.” Something something Icarus never really wanted to hurt their family - they just wanted their best friend back something something Midas telling them that they’ll be - *knowing they will be* - a good Quixis something something to be Quixis you need to be kind and considerate and things like that something something

“”We can rest,” you say, “in the pieces of what’s left or what we’ve found.”” Guys we don’t know where Midas is, but we do know they’re *somewhere.* Something about Icarus taking up the mantle of Quixis means Midas *finally* gets a break. Midas finally gets to rest and relax after so long of not being able to and having to constantly be doing something wand watching someone - Midas can just *rest.* (Wherever that may be, we have yet to find out.)

“I wish I’d done things different, oh, I wish I’d made it right” Something about how even if Midas doesn’t regret what they did - doesn’t regret leaving Icarus to live their life, doesn’t regret keeping them from being Quixis - part of them probably wishes they had done it differently. Something about wishing so many people didn’t have to die, or their worlds decay, or or or. Something about wishing they had made it right earlier - so they didn’t have to go through nearly as much pain. (So they didn’t have to go through feeling their body decay and *rot* from the inside out.) Something about wishing that, but not regretting - not truly - how you did it in the first place.

“But we’ll burn a hundred theaters, If it means we get the wallpaper right” Something about how Midas would let the Worldport fall apart, let worlds die, let *themself* die, if it meant Icarus got to see the end of their story - if it meant Icarus got to live the whole of their life that had been written out. They’d let it all die, let so much decay and fall apart until it was even decaying *them,* if it meant Icarus didn’t have to Quixis so young (they were younger than midas), if it meant Icarus got to say goodbye.

“Nothing quite prepared me for when that piano sang again.” While we don’t know exactly what Midas has been up to fo the past 2 months since the finale - I feel like finally getting a break and *centuries* and finally passing on your title and finally being *yourself* (or, mostly yourself) again wouldn’t be something you'd prepare yourself for in years of being alone - something about not being prepared to be able to rest and be yourself again after so long of *not* being able to do those things.

“Tomorrow I’ll do things different.” Maybe a bit more Icarus than it is Midas (Mostly because there’s not much more different Midas can do, not now, not after so much time has passed) - something about knowing what happens when you wait to bring a Quixis and something about vowing to *not* do that and put all of the Sherbs through that for a second time. Something about vowing to be different than the person you look so much alike. (Something about vowing to be different than Fable.)

“Tomorrow I’ll be brave.” This one is Midas - something about finally being brave enough to pass on the title of Quixis to Icarus, finally being able to let it go - give it up. (Even if it was just the end of Icarus’ story - even if it was the only logical time to pull them and pass it on - it was still brave. They had waited *so long.*)

-> [Icarus & Apollo]

-> Something about Midas living vicariously through Icarus. Something about Icarus showing Midas *so much* about life and their world and everything. Something about in turn Midas showing Icarus how to be Quixis, how to do this job *correctly* and not fuck it up like they did. Just that whole idea of ascension.

-> [505]

-> I guess Midas after Icarus ascends. That idea of going back home and not really knowing what awaits you. You have an idea, a concept of what might, and you're fully *prepared* for it. That idea of them *knowing* they have to leave after Icarus takes their place - or something like that.

-> [Show Yourself]

-> Icarus to Midas - How they just want to know what in the *world* Midas wants with them, and wants to do with them. Why Midas is following them, why they're changing the stuff they are, the decay, the eye - just wanting to *know*, but also very promptly ignoring Midas more often than not.

-> [Who You Are]

-> They're supposed to be Quixis!!! This is exactly who and where they're supposed to be!! This song really feels very Midas talking to Icarus - Telling them all of this as encouragement that they're going to do good, and that this is exactly where they're supposed to be, regardless.

-> [The Last Goodbye]

-> Saving the multiverse with another version of you. This is very Midas and Icarus coded - How Midas was willing to go down hand in hand with Icarus if it meant the multiverse surviving; also how Icarus was completely willing to take up the mantle of Quixis, even if it meant the people back home couldn't remember them.

-> Something about how they both think they're gonna die, Icarus and Midas - something about it.

-> [still feel.]

-> Dying over and over again, being reset over and over and *over* again, and yet. They still feel alive. Fable pulled them from the grave more times than they can count, and they still feel *alive* despite all that's happened.

-> Quixis is where they're supposed to be, Despite *jumping* they're still here, and they're still alive, and they're still *living.*

-> [Back To Black]

-> Oh so very wet birds. Something about them genuinely only saying goodbye with words - they didn't hug, didn't touch, no. Only words. Something about Ven going back to when he got pulled out, going back to Fable and all of the consequences that come with it. That whole idea Icarus isn't going to go back like that - they're going to go back to the present day and they're *going* to remember him.

-> [Spring and a Storm]

-> This one feels just very general epilogue/post finale times to me. Just everyone off doing their own thing, having fun and being happy. Reminiscing about the past *sure*, but having fun and being good all the same. (If you wanna look at it through an Icarus *specific* lens, for some added angst - Icarus watching their family and friends grow and be happy and gain things they couldn't gain before, while they're in the Worldport. Watching their family grow and get to be truly truly happy while they work on cleaning up Midas’ unintentional mess.)

-> [Ghost Song]

-> Just the whole idea of how after becoming Quixis, Icarus isn't reality seen or *known* anymore - And how they so desperately want to be. How they so desperately want to be seen and known and lived, but they can't - not for a while. How at this point they're just a ghost - changing and lurking, an entity everyone knows the name of, but not knows properly. Also almost that whole idea that they spend so much of their time watching over the Grove while their in the Worldport; changing and altering the small things so people, even if they won’t know until Icarus comes back, know they’re *there.*

-> [Introduction to the Snow]

-> Just that whole idea of now that Icarus is Quixis, they're alone. The Worldport is *empty* - no one is physically there with them, they're alone. They can't talk to anyone, no matter how much they so desperately want to. Also how this is *exactly* where they're meant to be.

-> [Today Today]

-> Just very ‘end of season 3’ coded - how upset Icarus, how much they were just *crying*, and they couldn't seem to stop regardless of how hard they tried. Also that whole idea of time going so so much slower in the Worldport, how ‘today' to Icarus must feel so so much different now. Also just that whole idea of being stuck between places, having everything to do because of everything up with the Worldport. That whole idea of so much happening in all the worlds they’re watching - there's so much to see and watch and understand and and and.

[Section Seven - Group songs, but an asterisk is attached to the first 4 because I write those pre stream and pre playlist re-organize- (sherbert please why did you do that right before stream-)]

-> [Machine]

-> The doubting of Fable's ideals, the realization of maybe they (Icarus) aren't doing the right thing by doing this, and how they don't *really* want to be a part of this anymore - how they don't want to be a part of Fable's machine, don't want to be a tool in his tool box, a means to an end.

-> The Idea that none of the people here, any of the members of the grove throughout the seasons, *want* to be a part of any of this - what to be here, want to do this, want to see any of this. The idea they don't want anymore resets - don't want anymore people to go through this, don't want to be a part of this revolving machine Fable has built for them.

-> [Suburbia Overture / Greetings from Mary Bell Township! / (Vampire) Culture / Love Me, Normally]

-> Just that whole idea of how Icarus is just *angry* at Fable - How they're beginning to doubt him, and his ideals, and how they're just angry at the concept that he won't bring people back - that this was all for *nothing.* Also just them being so incredibly angry at *everyone.*

-> This is also very just season 1. Just the anger at Enderian and Ominous Bane and. All of season 1 and its hardships.

-> [Enemy]

-> Something about how, especially at the end, *everyone* wanted Icarus dead, gone, or both. They didn't want to be friends with Icarus, they'd been given too many chances, and no one was willing to save them anymore. How everyone wants to be, *is*, Icarus’ enemy by the end.

-> Just. The idea of everyone, at some point, being each other's enemy. At some point everyone has been on opposite sides with someone else in the grove - and that meant everyone else was going to side with *one* of them.

-> [The Search]

-> Just Icarus’ mentality right at the end, trying to find something, *anything,* that'd save or fix them, regardless of what. Searching for something they won't find, looking for something they can't see. Also their whole mentality towards Fable - anger and annoyance and *mad* - how in the end they end up killing like he almost killed them.

-> The whole idea of everyone like. Looking for something they can't find, can't get back, can't *see* - and the idea that over time they all slowly grow angry toward Fable and the resets and everything that's taken *anything* from them.

-> [Misery Fell]

-> I feel like you could argue this is either the very end of season 3 coded, or just the grove coded in general. Something about how they're constantly going through terrible terrible things - constantly having misery fall upon them.

-> [When You're an Adams]

-> How living in the grove is often a while experience - How you need to be prepared for anything, really, because you never know what's gonna happen next; never know what Gods are going to get involved or whatever people are going to go on a harming spree or or or.

-> [Ready As I'll Ever Be]

-> Either Perix fight coded, Or the Faction preparing to fight Fable. Something about getting ready for this big battle and fight, while the other side does exactly the same as that.

-> [We Don't Talk About Bruno]

-> I feel like you could argue either Enderian or Fable? The grove singing about them - respectively. Enderian mostly after season one, while the singing about Fable more now. How they probably don't really want to talk about much of that, no matter how far into the future it gets.

[rogloptimist]

LAKE MISSOULA x JONAS VINGEGAARD

credits under cut!

lake missoula - richy mitch and the coal miners // jonas vingegaard - team presentation, tour de france 2024 // jonas vingegaard, tadej pogacar, and remco evenepoel - podium ceremony, tour de france 2024 (belga images) // tadej pogacar and jonas vingegaard - tour de france 2024 // wayward son - rainbow rowell // jonas vingegaard - stage 21, tour de france 2024 // it's down to legs - caley fretz // jonas vingegaard - stage 20, tour de france 2024 // jonas vingegaard - tour de france 2024 // jonas vingegaard - stage 11, tour de france 2024 // a poem on hope - wendell berry // jonas vingegaard and remco evenepoel - stage 19, tour de france 2024 // quora user shulamit widawsky // jonas vingegaard - stage 21, tour de france 2024 (getty images) // jonas vingegaard - stage 21, tour de france 2024 post-race interview (flobikes) // 'now the fight is over': jonas vingegaard concedes tour de france battle for yellow, but still aims for second - adam becket // jonas vingegaard - stage 19, tour de france 2024 post-race interview (flobikes) // video: jonas vingegaard and matteo jorgenson consoled after heart-breaking end to stage 19 of 2024 tour de france for team visma | lease a bike - kieran wood // jonas vingegaard - tour de france 2024 // jonas vingegaard - tour de france 2024 // 'probably the hardest moment of my career'-- jonas vingegaard on his crash and fight to be ready for the tour de france - stephen farrand // jonas vingegaard's tour de france was a venn diagram - iain treloar // rise up and salute the sun: the writings of suzy kassem - suzy kassem // jonas vingegaard - tour de france 2023 // jonas vingegaard - stage 21, tour de france 2024 // jonas vingegaard - stage 11, tour de france 2024 // vingegaard exhausted after tour de france: may cut season short - sjoerd valkering // jonas vingegaard and tadej pogacar - stage 20, tour de france 2024 (belga images) // the thing is - ellen bass // "if you had told me four months ago that i would be second, i wouldn't have believed you" - jonas vingegaard disappointed but proud of his tour de france - ondrej zhasil // jonas vingegaard and tadej pogacar - stage 11, tour de france 2024 // jonas vingegaard - stage 11, tour de france 2024 post-race interview (nbc sports) // alfred lord tennyson // jonas vingegaard and tadej pogacar - stage 11, tour de france 2024 // remco evenepoel and jonas vingegaard - stage 21, tour de france 2024 // jonas vingegaard and tadej pogacar - tour de france 2024 // matteo jorgenson and jonas vingegaard - stage 19, tour de france 2024 // matteo jorgenson and jonas vingegaard - tour de france 2024 // jonas vingegaard and tadej pogacar - podium ceremony, tour de france 2024 // jonas vingegaard and wout van aert - tour de france 2024 (team visma | lease a bike)

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Ind. Sundown you are Everything to me

[mellotronmkll]

[spacedlexi]

Kenny and Violet anon here YES.

Violet is upset because someone she defended against her found family of 8 years let her get taken by brainwashing adults for 2 seconds and everyone flips their lid.

But Kenny refuses to stop a train, and gets into a whole fight with Lee over it (AND REFUSES TO HELP YOU FIND A LOST LITTLE GIRL WHILE YOU’RE FIGHTING OFF AN INFECTION, where as Violet always defends you in Episode 1 regardless of whether you ignored and/or antagonized her or not), and gets mad at an 11 year old for not being able to handle helping someone in labor by herself and everybody’s like “Nah it’s okay, his family died years ago so he gets to do whatever he wants.” as if Violet didn’t witness one of the only consistent family members in her life die in front of her 💀

There’s so many comparisons I could make and one day I’ll make a Venn Diagram about all of their similarities but for now I’m glad someone pointed this out.

there are some things kenny does that have No excuse (like refusing to help bitten lee look for missing clem all because hes mad you didnt side with him enough. leaving lee to singlehandedly save himself in the pharmacy because he got scared. threatening to slap clem for blaming herself for lees death. off the top of my head). but his behavior on the train is annoying yet understandable. he doesnt want to admit his son is dying and he feels like duck dying in the first place is his fault for not saving shawn. you can convince him to stop without things getting physical

the Problem comes in when people can understand and sympathize with kennys annoying/shitty actions, but when it comes to violet (who has the same "my family is dead and its made me bitter and closed off" backstory (and her whole arc is about learning to love and care again)), suddenly all understanding goes out the window. even tho shes not even a FRACTION as annoying and shitty as kenny can get 😭😭

violet is mean to clem for the One scene where youre introduced to her (ignoring your first moment with her in the courtyard where shes smiling at clem so you already know her shitty attitude later is a lie. louis even defends her. wingman lol. and depending on what you say in response to her you can Immediately see the regret on her face LOL). but before the scene even Ends shes complimenting clem and clem loves it. then youre forced to talk to her and tenn about the twins, you have a nice card game where you can joke around with her, then she shows up at the dorm and they have a nice heart to heart about how theyre BOTH struggling with the loss of people theyve loved, and they can sympathize about both being harsher than they intend (THEY GET EACH OTHER CANONICALLY)

and vi not being "a people person" is a huge part of her arc?? she doesnt like that shes like this 😭 but shes also better with people than she gives herself credit for and its why she makes a good leader. (and even if you pick the "came off strong" option clem is OBVIOUSLY teasing about it but vi cant tell and gets defensive ("its not like im trying to be bffs or whatever. sorry" is so "you want to kiss me so bad it makes you look stupid" of her)

and then after this shes never mean to clem again?? (unless you antagonize her but even then its mostly just about her standing her ground and not taking shit she doesnt deserve. which is fair). shes only mean to brody while fishing (and shes mean to brody because deep down she blames HERSELF) and the whole POINT of that scene is to try and mend their broken relationship which immediately makes vi a happier/nicer person if you do (also interesting how louis doesnt get any shit for His behavior while hunting 🤨 no hes just cool and fun). violet also apologizes for being "weird" in the dorms the previous night as well (bby girl why are you afraid that everything you do is weird 😭 she says that word a lot)

violet will Always have clems back (in EP1 and 2!!) No Matter What you do or say to her. i think people take her loyalty for granted. so if you dont save her in EP2 and expect to continue to have her unwavering loyalty in EP3? thats a You problem. she is Fucked Up mentally on that boat by lilly and her not-exactly-ex, and then gets caught in the explosion she didnt want anything to do with. AND THEN SHE APOLOGIZES because she recognizes she was WRONG

(not her literally trying to make a joke about it to ease the tension 😭 people dont give her credit for also having a sense of humor. like louis is the only one who cracks jokes around here) but again when it comes to kenny his actions are understandable and defendable even without an apology 🙄 i literally side with kenny on Everything except the larry thing and if you dont make the right dialogue choice with him? he will not help you look for clem. because of larry 😐 i killed your son for you bro and then took care of his walker doppelganger so you didnt have to. and this isnt even touching his behavior in S2. and yet despite everything he does hes still one of the most beloved characters in the fandom 🤨

i just have to remind myself sometimes that all vi options were made 53-61% and the vi haters are a loud minority. her always being above 50% is so interesting to me because i love when choices are split perfectly 50/50. but the way the fandom talks about her (and the women in general) you wouldnt think shes technically the more popular option (and i Hate playing the popularity card its so annoying, but im only doing it bc people also say shit like "maybe if vi wasnt so mean more people would pick her" they DO pick her!!! you just got mad she was mean for 5 seconds, never payed attention to her again, and used her determinate reaction on the boat as justification for not liking her 😑) (also ignores how mean louis gets in EP2 regardless of choice?? but like kenny His actions are defendable and sympathetic and hers arent 🙄)

[the-meme-monarch]

biggest complaint about you is your not a big enough hater about kralsei. Get rageful with it. Make a whole rant about how gross it is in canon. Let the rage take over

oh it takes everything i have to not say swears about it like every day trust me. i am kra/lsei number 1 biggest hater

[pop-punklouis]

-

[distraughtlesbian]

literally the best part of this whole stupid book iwlove weird obsessed horndogs thee villain archetype of all time. he’s so silly. “we could’ve had a life together”, he says to his lesbian ex-neighbour who he’s just shot with a crossbow bolt meanwhile her girlfriend who he’s also just shot is half dead across the room. god i love it here he said me and the bad bitch im going to fumble

[canary-prince]

Any post that contains the phrase "you" in a big, general, plural sense that automatically accuses the reader of being part of the "you" that op is rhetorically berating are deeply, deeply unhelpful in regard to compassion fatigue. It's also just manipulative; the clear intention is to pressure anyone reading it into reblogging it in order to prove they are not part of the "you" being accused.

These posts bother me and I understand that the authors of these posts are feeling powerless and have learned that screaming and yelling and shaming is an effective tactic because they weren't given enough attention to meet their needs through other methods. But again, it's going to increase compassion fatigue and increase the use of shame as a method of social control, which is not ideal.

[prowl-autism-extraordinaire]

i really dislike how people view your behavior/feelings toward dogs as like. a litmus test of your inherent goodness or whatever. if you dont like dogs you’re Odd. if you dont try to pet random dogs thats Strange. if you dont try to rescue stray dogs thats Heartless. if you kill a dying dog instead of making it suffer thats Cruel. if you like dogs youre Correct. if you see a dog and want to pet it you are Normal. if you see a stray and try to take it to the vet or adopt it you are Kind. if you force an animal with shit quality of life to survive because your feelings are more important to you, you are Good.

and its fucking bullshit!

[ubersaur]

one weird part of my job is sometimes I get little old ladies with sweet hearts poking through the compost box on the bottom of my cart that tell me I shouldn't be throwing away what I am throwing away. Like yeah, I get it. Food waste sucks! I hate throwing anything away. But everything down there is rotting or bruised or withered or just ugly enough that I know it will sit on the shelf until it is rotting, bruised, and withered. I cannot mark it down, and you will not buy it at full price. "But poor people---!" Poor people deserve food that isn't moldy or bruised or withered or ugly! And afaik our company already donates actually edible food to pantries!

[c10v3r]

holds four bfb in my hands so gently as if i even breathe on them he would break

[bnnuy-wabbit]

this entire Music Taste debate thing re:rap is getting annoying really fast. Im not USian enough for this.

[something-about-sunflowers]

Ooooooohhhhhhh now I’m thinking of an Izzy with an Ella Enchanted style curse on him hhhhhhhhhh

Read-more cause this got away from me lmfao

He keeps it fairly under wraps for most of his life, sets out to sea at twelve, gets picked up by a press gang at seventeen. He manages, its  expected, for a sailor to follow orders on a navy ship, after all (of course ‘no’ isn't an option available to him anyway).

They get boarded by pirates when he's about twenty one and he’s taken on as part of their crew, the captain is after crew more than loot, tells him he should join (saying ‘no’ would have just had him killed, and he's doing his very best to live).

Some time after, he's nearing twenty five, they’re raided by another ship, the Ranger. Benjamin Hornigold likes a ruthless sailor (a ruthless pirate) and Israel Hands has never allowed himself to be anything but. He decides he wants to keep this one. He offers, Izzy accepts. Ben tells him to kill his former captain (wouldn’t have said ‘no’ even if he could have, the man was a bastard).

He earns a reputation of being kind of a kiss-ass, he doesn’t really mind, it keeps most people from asking questions. But Ben’s got his pet projects Edward Teach and John ‘Jack’ Rackham and they’re both too sharp for their own good (though, Jack is better at playing dumb). They notice its not just Captain’s orders he follows to the letter, but everyone’s. They test him, subtly at first, but eventually they show their hand. Tell him that they know there’s more to Izzy’s obedience than he lets on.

He’s terrified for how they might use this against him (the usual ways, which most men abused without even knowing about his curse, easier, safer to let them think he wanted it) but they tell him they don’t want to take his agency from him like that. They offer to help him. He’s not sure whether to trust it (he knows, by rights, he shouldn’t) but he can’t say ‘no’ to ‘trust us, let us help’ (whether Edward is aware of the command, Izzy will never know, decades later Edward doesn’t even remember what he said to convince him).

So they stick by him, as best they can, if someone gives an order he doesn’t want to follow they’ll tell him, quietly as they can, not to. It works, for the most part. Though eventually, Ben notices Izzy’s not quite as obedient anymore (though he still never says ‘no’ to his captain’s orders). He doesn’t like that. He notices Izzy’s been spending more time around Teach and Rackham, decides they’re bad influences (he intends them to captain other ships in his fleet, they’re allowed to push back on orders, Izzy will never have a command of his own, he is not). He separates them. Puts Teach and Rackham on the Marianne with the flimsy excuse of ‘getting practice in’. (he sees them off with Izzy at his side, a claiming hand on his shoulder, Ed and Jack aren't sure how they manage it, but they don't try to kill him right then and there) They now only ever see each other when they all make port. Its a trying few months (for Ed and Jack, for Izzy. . .).

They meet at port one last time (apart, at least). Edward has a plan. They’re going to mutiny. They’ve been stirring the pot on the Marianne (whispers had already started before they got there, not too many of the crew were happy to miss out on loot just because Ol’ Ben had an apparent soft spot for the Crown). He presses his knife into Izzy's hands. Tells him, back on the ship, when everyone else is asleep, he’s to slip into the captain’s cabin and kill Ben, in his sleep, so he can’t order him to stop (Izzy is never sure if he would have said ‘no’ to that unintentional order, had he been able).

The mutiny goes off without a hitch (Ben wakes when the knife plunges into his throat, but he can’t give orders around the steel and the blood that choke him). Edward makes Izzy his first mate, gives Jack the Marianne. He and Izzy go on to create a legend.

Things are good, for a long while they're good. Edward is an inventive and charismatic captain, the crew love him and the loot he leads them to, and Izzy's position (and Edward's possessive protectiveness over him) means that anyone who dares order Israel Hands around, that doesn't have the title of 'his captain', meets a quick end.

Unfortunately, for Izzy, 'good' never tends to last. He'd hoped (and damn him for daring to hope) that he was free, as free as he could be, from his curse, sailing under Edward (Blackbeard), and he was. For a while. Its about a decade later when Edward starts to get bored. He never orders Izzy to do anything degrading or dangerous (more dangerous than he can handle at least) but it still hurts somewhere deep in his chest the first time Edward gives a casual order and doesn't look to see if Izzy wants to follow it.

They come across Jack every now and again. It always takes him a bit to readjust to Izzy, to remember he needs to phrase things as suggestions rather than orders, he always manages eventually. (that little pain in his chest digs a little deeper when he notices Edward avoids giving him orders when Jack is around, though he can't say why) Their crossing paths wind up fewer and farther between as the years go on. One notable visit involved Jack asking Edward to marry him and Anne Bonny ('why not just have your first mate do it?' 'Annie is my first mate, man, 'sides, I want my two best buds to be there for it!'). Izzy isn't sure what to make of Edward's renewed willingness to run into Jack afterwards (only knows that the pain in his chest grows all the sharper for it, and at seeing Jack, happy with Anne, he feels a bit monstrous about that). It doesn't matter much in the end, things go back to normal once Mary/Mark (depending on the day) Read enters the picture and (mostly) steals Annie away from Jack.

And suddenly Izzy finds himself at fifty five, on a beach, wondering ‘what kind of fucking idiot runs his ship aground‘. Edward is intrigued, Izzy can't tell him 'no'.

He hates the Revenge with every fiber of his being. None of the crew listen to him, Edward doesn't back him up (and neither do Fang or Ivan, following their captain's lead). The first time one of the crew gets it into their head to give him a mocking order he nearly passes out with the force it takes him to not jump to the task immediately. He retreats to his cabin later and vomits at the feeling of violation he hasn't felt in decades (he tells himself he hasn't felt it, Edward is his captain, above all else is loyalty to his captain, his own feelings don't matter).

He hates stupid fucking Stede Bonnet most of all. Hates him for putting a light back in Edward's eyes that hasn't been there for a long while. Hates his pompous attitude, his flippant disregard for the institution of piracy, how little he seems to actually care for the safety and well-being of his own men (leave alone the danger he poses to Edward). Most of all he hates that he calls him 'Iggy'.

So when he challenges him to a duel, and he accepts, its only for Edward's sake that he sets the terms at 'banishment' and not 'death'. When he loses he finds he rather wished it had been to the death. (he doesn't understand, Edward wanted this, he hadn't even told him to stop, hadn't ordered him to stop)

He retreats to Spanish Jackie'z to lick his wounds and to work out a plan to pull Edward out of the steady march towards his own demise that he faces aboard the Revenge. Jackie, Izzy is fairly certain, knows about his curse to some extent (he suspects she doesn't abuse the knowledge for the sake of having a bargaining chip, should she need it), she talks him out of any corners the navy bloke with a grudge against Stede Bonnet inadvertently walks him into. She also runs him into Jack Rackham (and Izzy realizes, at the sight of the silver starting to peek its way through his dirty blond, that its been nearly ten years since they've last seen each other, that pain in his chest not any duller for it) and the last piece of the plan falls into place. Jack tries to talk him out of it, says its not a good idea, even offers him a position on his own ship (not that its his ship to offer anymore, since Annie took over captaincy and made Mary/Mark her first mate, but they've both always had a soft spot for Izzy on account of Jack's soft spot for Izzy, they'd be more than willing), not once does he order though and Izzy can't let Edward keep doing this to himself. Jack will understand when he sees him, Izzy says. Jack goes.

(Izzy hears, when the navy gunners crow triumphantly about hitting the dinghy, the one that Jack and Edward were in, the one that Edward jumped out of, he tells himself not to let it show when that pain in his chest comes back twenty-fold at the thought)

Edward claims the Act of Grace. He and Stede Bonnet leave to lick the king’s boots. Izzy doesn't make it a single day as captain. Edward comes back just before he goes overboard with the anchor to follow. He comes back wrong. Izzy can't take it. Edward can't take it.

The Kraken wakes and Izzy is introduced to the concept of a living hell. (even the captive crew stop trying to give him orders, at the haunted look in his eye, when they see how the Kraken orders him around, when he discovers Spriggs alive, if a lot worse for the wear, he doesn't even need the order to keep it under wraps, he doesn't want to know what the Kraken would order him to do if the boy is found out, he shudders at the thought)

When stupid fucking Stede Bonnet (and his marooned crew) finds his way back to the Revenge Izzy allows himself a single moment to feel relieved. Until, at least, the Kraken orders him to kill the man. He can't. He fights. The crew are all shouting at him not to, it eases the strain. The Kraken levels his pistol at his head, the crew goes silent.

'Israel, I order you to kill Stede Bonnet'.

His sword is in his hand. Stede's gotten better with his own sword, is managing to hold his own against Izzy (in truth, its mostly due to Izzy straining to not follow the order, but there is a marked improvement). The Kraken growls 'Kill him Izzy, fucking- kill him!' Izzy loses his sword to the mast again (he's grateful this time), his knife is in his hand a second later. He's got less reach than Stede does but Stede is trying not to hurt him. Why is he trying not to hurt him?

'Bonnet. Bonnet, you have to stop me. I can't. I can't kill you. I can't let him do that to himself. You have to. Run me through. Right here-' he taps his chest with his free hand, the one that isn't swinging the knife around, the left side, right over his heart '-only way to stop this. He might even listen to you afterwards.'

'Izzy. Izzy no.' In his shock, Stede lowers his sword. Izzy swears as he knocks it out of his hand. Presses close, crowds him against the doors to the captain's cabin, knife against his throat.

'Just fucking kill him already!'

A bead of blood wells under the tip of the blade. Izzy meets his own eyes in the polished reflection of his knife.

'Izzy stop fucking around and do what I told you to!'

His hands shake with the weight of the order. There are tears in his eyes, he can see them in his reflection.

A memory comes, unbidden: He, Edward, and Jack hiking through dense jungle to find a witch that Jack thinks might be able to break his curse, or at least tell them how to break it themselves. Her words 'I cannot break this curse Israel, this is something you must do for yourself. I can tell you this, however, to do this you'll need to face yourself. Face yourself and free yourself. That is all I can say, I'm sorry, I'd tell you more if I could.' They'd left disappointed, Jack cursing about scams and 'you can't even trust witches these days, man', Edward contemplatively silent.

Face yourself and free yourself. Izzy's eyes flick upwards to Stede's concerned face, back down to the blade. He meets his own eyes again.

'Izzy-' The rest of the Kraken's words go unheard.

Izzy tells himself, voice scarcely more than a breath: 'You will not be obedient.'

He feels, more than sees, Stede's gasp. He ignores it. His hand still wants to press the knife upwards. He tries again.

'You will not be obedient.' A little louder this time.

'The fuck did you just say-' Again.

'You will not be obedient!'

The knife flies across the deck, lands with a clatter. Silence (but for the sound of Izzy's labored breaths).

He turns, ignores the shocked crew, meets Edward's wide eyes with his own watery ones (when had the tears started falling so freely?).

'. . . Iz. . . ?'

Everything goes black.