#im still learning!!! and experimenting!!! im not satisfied but this feels like im on the right track!

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Ind. Sundown you are Everything to me

[lemongogo]

[whoviandoodler]

petition to stop making fun of people who like those pinterest-esque posts with sad quotes and whatever bcs to you they may be edgy and cringy but to someone out there it might be the first time that they are seeing someone put into words the confusing experience of being Human. same goes with those bad ya books like. yes they are objectively, technically bad and most times just badly mimic something someone else did but someone will see deep ideas explored in them for the first time and marvel. and maybe instead of going lmao dumb kids we should go 'hey if you liked that book you might like [a book that was much better at exploring trope from that angle'. peace on planet earth or whatever

[love44lew]

what turns them on/off

彡drivers lewis hamilton, max verstappen, charles leclerc, sebastian vettel, jenson button

彡genre hcs/scenarios

彡summary what gets their wheels spinning and what makes ‘em dnf ★

彡notes i apologize for the wait my loves i didn’t want any of these to feel rushed </3 thank you for 100 followers ❤️❤️

彡warnings sexual content

————-꧁🪼🦈🐋🐬🦭꧂-————

lewis

pleasuring you lewis loves to satisfy the people he loves. getting them gifts, compliments, paying the bill for any meal, you name it. as long as his special ones are happy, hes happy. so in bed you can expect those same things to apply. he gets pleasure from pleasuring you, he loves it. he enjoys seeing you trembling, blushing and fucked out more than his own pleasure. thats why his favorite thing to do is eat you out. and by life itself, this man can EAT!! its almost like your pussy put a spell on him he gets so lost in the sauce. you physically have to push him off to make him stop and by that time your legs are already shaking. he really touches the ocean floor if you know what i mean!! and the d is fire!! and it will put you to sleep. lewis loves being your personal melatonin.

meaningless sex when lewis was single and needed some pleasure every once in a while, he would just go on raya or hit up one of the six trillion girls who wanted him. he wasn’t satisfied with living that way. lewis is a lover not a player. he’s been through a lot of stuff to make him this way and he learned this the hard way through his late twenties and early thirties. born to be a lover, forced to be a hoe !! fortunately though, he met you and looking back on it, he’s realized how much he hated the shallowness of it all. lewis craves for deep meaningful connections and just having sex with random women didn’t fill that hole in his heart. he had to relearn the true meaning of sex and how magical and special such an experience can be. you helped him rediscover this important aspect of his life and it feels great. being with you has definitely taught him quality over quantity.

max

loss of senses max needs to see you, so darkness is a no no. plus, more unnecessary risk of hurting yourselves. he loves the sound of your voice, weather its your moaning and whining as he works your body in every way you enjoy or its just you rambling about your day while running your soft fingers through his thin silky hair. max needs the stimulation of sight and sound to get himself going. “let me hear you” he’ll whisper into your ear

this may be why he loves his mirrors !! the only solution to this issue is to just fuck u in front of a mirror. most men love to do that for their own pleasure but the only thing max is looking at while fucking you in front of a mirror is the way your face twitches, contorts, and relaxes with every thrust. the way your doe eyes roll back and cross, further showing to him how good he fucks you. he picks you up by your neck forcing you to straighten your back as he whispers sweet praise into your ear. “you look so pretty like this baby” “you want me to keep doing that gorgeous?” “uhuh im fucking you good baby” your legs twitch every time his sweet voice sings into your ear telling you everything you need to hear.

charles

charles loves to see you in lace, latex, and silk. the way the latex hugs your figure so beautifully makes you almost look naked. weather its black, beige, white, or print he loves when you look all sexy just for him. silk is almost like maternal for him. as much as he loves to see your curves he also loves the look of ‘sheets after sex’ the open back with the jewelry and the flowy trim, he loves it. it simply just makes him want to imagine you bloated with your shared creation but still keeping your elegance and beauty along with it. the look of silk makes your skin glow like the sun and you simply look like a greek goddess in his eyes. the beautiful custom embroidery that revolves around your every curve when you wear lace is unmatched. he loves that it shows just enough that he can imagine what hes already seen but also covers enough that others cant. the sexy elegant vibe of lace changes your aura enough to make him want to eat you out through your thin panties. your beautiful skin covered by a thin soft custom embroidery made just for him makes his mind go wild.

waiting charles is very impatient when it comes to his pleasure. weather its the pleasure of winning or reaching tip of his climax so good that he’ll just want to fall asleep after, he’ll work hard to make sure he gets there, for you too. sure, he can do foreplay but only for a certain amount of time until he begins to bore. ‘lets get to the good stuff already’ ((sass)) charles is a gentleman, so he will make sure you finish before him. plus, he has amazing stamina, so don’t feel rushed to reach your climax, he can wait for that. sometimes he’ll slow down just to watch you overstimulate for a little bit longer, just until you start fussing before going rough and slow, just how u like it. “whats wrong mon cœr? don’t you like it slow?” “ahh you want it harder.. yeah, just like that.”

sebastian

cuddling (smirk) the bed creaks as seb adjusts himself to face your back swinging an arm over your waist and the other snaked around your neck. “good morning, der liebling” he greeted in his raspy low morning tone, planting soft kisses on your cheek and shoulder. you turned your head to catch his lips. “good morning sunshine” you teased his nickname. he rolled his eyes, a smirk tugging his lips. he kissed your nose before diving back onto your lips, his hand now squeezing and caressing your waist and hip. you scooted back, carefully grinding your rear on his front. his hand stuck on your hip while his other now holding your neck. you continued grinding your ass back on him. little moans and purrs escaping between kisses.

full attention its important that you fully engage with seb while having relations. if you seem at all uninterested in what you’re doing he simply wont have the means to do anything anymore. its important to always make sure you’re not holding back when it comes to him. he loves when your hands are anywhere they can find groping or caressing his skin as hes burried deep in your core. he needs to feel extra wanted every time. “touch me” he whispers into your ear as he slowly inserts himself. the extra sensory makes him go wild as he resists cumming after just a couple strokes. your nails lightly scratching circles into his scalp as he’s pressing your knees into the cushion below. even when hes fucking you from behind you always reach a hand over to run down his chest and abs and make eye contact as you match his thrust rhythm.

(i might add jenson in the future but im trying to get this out for you guys asap!!)

—-

dm for tags!! plz request more ideas ❤️

[wuwapetal1s]

write anything abt geshu lin or calcharo im begging on my hands and knees ill give u my first born or a kidney whichever u want

I don't need any organs can I have a pair of knees maybe (ty for the request anon :3)

Love languages

content: sfw, rambling-ish format, not entirely proofread (it's midnight currently), swearing used, etc.

reqs open!

— Calcharo.

Calcharo is an ‘acts of service man’ through and through. To me, he doesn't seem the best at giving affection verbally though he thinks he's *very* good at it personally. As in, you will ask him for comfort or reassurance and he'll give it to you readily… But it will sound so stern coming from him.

“I feel uncomfortable with [such and such]..”

“I understand. I will rectify/fix that.”

Communication KING, though I imagine it can still feel very intimidating to bring stuff up to him. It will always be met with understanding, and he certainly would try his hardest to accommodate what language/tone you'd rather hear in those moments (autistic.)

Getting back to the original point, he will do just about anything for you. There's hardly any limits or rules to that fact. He will kill for you, he will fight for you, he will get in trouble with the law for you, etc etc. He'll also grab extra of your snacks the moment he's back in town and stops at the market before he goes to visit you.

Tired from a long day at work or studying? He'll clean up as quietly as he can while you sleep. You'll wake up to all the dishes done and your living space looks pretty much spotless.

He's the kind of man to learn how you organize things pretty easily, even if you're a very messy person. He's very clued in on anything that involves you (smitten, much?) and he's also just got a keen eye on him.

"Ugh, I can't find where I left my-”

“Bottom drawer of the nightstand.”

“Oh.. Thank you!”

He loves holding and kissing you as well, it's his favorite thing to be welcomed home to. Just the ability to sink into your arms is like heaven to him. Receiving, he probably likes physical touch a lot more, but he feels 100x more satisfied doing something for you to show he cares :).

— Genshu Lin.

Genshu Lin is a possessive man. It's subtle, but it's definitely there. Above all else, he adores you. He's a deeply devoted person when in a relationship, though I don't feel like he's had a lot of experience to pinpoint that exactly, but it's his nature. I believe he enjoys gifting you things he gets his hands on, trinkets or otherwise.

He mostly enjoys giving you things you can make use of or wear. He always gets a warmth in his chest when he sees you in the bracelet he got you (one that matches his that he keeps tucked away for safekeeping) or using pens he gave you after you kept losing your last ones. As long as it works, suits you, and it means a lot to you, he's snatching it up.

I also believe he's a sucker for stealing kisses in private. He may not seem it to anyone else, but he's a softie. Just for you though. Cooking something or simply sitting around? Funny how his lips just found their way to your cheek!

He's a bit more apprehensive about receiving it unless it's the time you two lay in bed together, then he'd let you rub his back or play with his hair. In return, he most enjoys quality time.

Even if it's something as mundane as running an errand or having to pick something up from the pharmacy he wants you there. He'd tell you “I don't need your presence, I just prefer it” if questioned, but he does need it. More than he knows or even lets on, he wants you and needs you there. He hates having to be away from you. It drives him up a wall almost. Like nearly insane.

After long hours working or even days/weeks of it he wants nothing more than to just lay with you and bathe in your presence as if it's a balm for his soul :’).

I love these men they're so fine

[saintvainglorious]

My First Fanbind! A Black Sails Fic Anthology Series

It took me a year (and a lot of anxious research) before I worked up the courage to bookbind fanfiction, and after months of on-again-off-again work, my first fanbind is finally done!

I knew that if I was going to bookbind fic, I had to bind something from the Black Sails fandom, aka the fandom and show that have had the biggest impact on my life. Y'all, I almost went into academia to study slavery in the 17th-18th century Caribbean because of this show - when folks say this show rewires your brain chemistry, they are NOT kidding. THEE show of all time. Happy 10th anniversary to Black Sails! This fandom is small but mighty. May we continue to get our hearts and souls blasted to smithereens by this show for many years to come.

Ao3 abounds with magnificent Black Sails oneshots, so I decided to put together an anthology of my favorite Silverflint fics under 20k, which I split into two volumes. Included are works by @justlikeeddie, @vowel-in-thug, @balloonstand, @annevbonny, @francisthegreat, @nysscientia, and more! Thank you, thank you all, you brilliant wonderful people, for gracing the Internet with such amazing writing. When I read the fics in these anthologies I want to fling myself into the sun.

More on the design and binding process below the cut!

Vol. 1 Page Count: 270 (12 fics) Vol. 2 Page Count: 248 (11 fics) Body Font: Sabon Next LT (10.5 pt) Title Font: Goudy Old Style Other Fonts: IM Fell English, pirates pw

The typeset (which I did in Word) took a while, mainly because I'd never done it before. Manually adjusting the hyphenation line-by-line was especially tedious. After making these books, I abandoned Word in favor of InDesign, in large part because InDesign gives you way finer control over your justification and hyphenation settings.

Regarding my actual design choices, I'm happy with how the ocean motif on the title page turned out (it's not the same pattern as my endpapers, but they're complimentary) and I'm very fond of my divider dingbats, which are little swords! Goudy Old Style was a fun title font to use, since it's the font that Black Sails uses as its logo. The stories in Vol. 1 are divided into parts based on what Silver WAS at that point in the show (cook, quartermaster, or king), and Vol. 2 is split up into comedies, histories (AUs set in the canon universe) and tragedies - befitting Black Sails' Shakespearean ~vibes~.

I stuck to a flatback binding, as I wasn't feeling quite ambitious enough to try rounding and/or backing. I've learned that I ~Anakin Skywalker voice~ hate sanding, enjoy folding/sewing, and don't LIKE edge trimming but enjoy the results enough to make it worth it.

The real adventure was decorating the cover, which remained bare for months. After agonizing over Illustrator and experimenting unsuccessfully with HTV and lokta paper embossing, I ultimately turned to using stencil vinyl to paint on the designs. There was a bit of seepage under some of the stencils, but I was able to scrape off the excess with my Cricut weeding tool without damaging the coated surface of the bookcloth (probably Arrestox Blue Ribbon from Hollander's). Even though it was very time-consuming, I'm so happy with the end result of the stenciled paint job and I intend to stick with stencils for my foreseeable future binds.

Are there things I would change? Sure. It was humid out when I printed, so the pages have got a wave. There’s an extra two pages in Vol 2. that I have no idea how I missed, and I got a line of glue in the middle of one of my Vol. 2 endpapers. I’m pretty sure I didn’t case in quite right, since my endpapers pull away from the case at the spine. I think the inner margins are a bit too big, and despite going line-by-line there’s still some wacky justification spacing in the typeset. But man, am I proud of these books! It is so satisfying to learn a new skill - MANY new skills, if we’re being honest - and to make something both beautiful and practical. If I’m still binding in two years or so, I can see myself redoing the typeset in InDesign, cutting out the existing text block, and reusing the cases. I’m also already planning for Vol. 3, which will be Silverflint Modern AUs.

Thanks for reading!

[voidheartkisses]

Okay hello hi hello,

First off you're amazing and a gift to the world, I wish I had even half your talent. Your last piece blew my mind and I just HAD to ask,

How long have you been drawing/painting for? I imagine forever but I'm always curious how long it takes before artists reach these sorts of levels where it evolves into full-scale projects as opposed to smaller hobbyist crafts. There are so many beautiful art pieces on this platform as a whole and I'm constantly baffled by it all

Sorry if my excitement is off-putting that piece is heavenly and my mind is blown. Hope you're doing well!

Hi and thank you! That's a good question

So I've been drawing since I was born, but I've been drawing digitally for 8 years. I think in the very beginning most artists should just focus on having fun, you'll basically improve by default

after a while you will want to improve. It will be slow, but this is the stage where you'll recognize what you need work on

I'd say the turning point is when you've finally gotten far enough into your art journey without any sort of formal training (ie, a lot of artists dont learn the basics/fundamentals first, which is fine since most of us start as hobbyists) But I think learning them really did help me a lot. You start to think more about how light and shadow lays, depth, 3D objects, and more.

I highly recommend watching this video about levels of art, it's been really helpful and motivating to me throughout the years

This part is going to be long so you don't have to read it but I just wanna give my personal journey and how I got to now if anyone thinks it'll be helpful:

(2017) With digital art, I started off on ms paint and occasionally ibis paint x. Mostly using anime deviantart bases (EMBARRASSING), but after a while I developed my own style based on the people I was inspired by at the time, I was just happy to draw and didn't care much about improving at this time

(2019) The people you look up to artistically will naturally change over time (and thats okay), after a while I decided to switch to firealpaca, where I guess I got more invested on how light and shadows work, as well as making my characters look a bit more natural and develop my own style, your preference in aesthetic may also change over time which is noticeable here

(2021) Eventually, I began to lean more into semirealism (which isn't everyones preference and thats okay! realism shouldn't be the ultimate end goal of art) but I really enjoyed making stylized characters look 3D and in natural looking environments, since I felt it spoke to my own experiences, a lot of artists draw from real life experiences. I focused more on anatomy at this time as well as textures and environments, composition also became a big deal for me at this time, as well as wanting to use different colors

(2024) The change from LINEART to DIGITAL PAINTING in 2022 was the hardest for me once I switched to clip studio paint, it was basically like starting all over and I was so lost. I had a lot to figure out on my own but I knew it was a transition I had to make to draw the kind of art I wanted. But I began to study and take more things into consideration, I didn't like my art so I simply kept going "I can do better", learning from my previous mistakes and slowly making something I would be more satisfied with. At this point art felt more like "projects" then anything, because I wanted to make pieces that were of quality and had time and care put into each of them, sure it meant there was no longer much quantity. but hey that's what my smaller Cult of the Lamb lineart drawings are for!! 💙

I'm still growing and I definitely have a long way to go, but I am very proud of my progress this year, and I'll continue to grow until I'm satisfied (haha im stubborn) I also want to develop my secondary lineart style that I do when I'm not painting, since I feel that is important too

in short; time, practice, dedication, and passion are the most important, draw what you love above all else because it will be your drive to keep going, staying motivated was the most important for me

Sorry for the long post 😭

[beemers-hell]

Hi Beemer! I wanted to ask for some on advice when it comes to making your OC refs/lineups? I’ve literally been trying to draw my characters for years now and still can’t seem to get it “right”

the tough answer for this is that, at least in my eyes, your ocs ref sheets arent gonna look perfect because youll always be changing how you draw in some way! They may look "right" one day but then the next suddenly it feels off, and that's because the way you draw your characters is always going to change the longer you continue to draw them. Like, I could pull up examples of all of Eb's old ref sheets that look wonky as HELLLL now, but I thought "I finally got it right!" when I finished them initially. I really did think these were peak eb back in the day!

Hell, even Eb's CURRENT ref sheet Im not satisfied with anymore because the way I draw her has changed since I finished the ref sheet! [I know they're wearing different clothes but Im using the Draculaura cosplay piece as a comparison for how I draw Eb's face/body in general]

So my best best piece of advice for you is: you gotta learn how to settle! Cause remaking the ref sheet every time you think it doesn't look right is gonna drive you NUTS, i speak from experience lol. Just as long as you think you've got every major detail you want in their design, you're good!

Also, if you're drawing a lineup of characters, draw each character's ref sprite on top of each other on separate layers in the same canvas, it really helps with keep their sizes consistent/height & scaling accurate!

[whole-circus]

hello! could i ask for nswf alphabet for ben?? i dont know if you do things like that so feel free to ignore it! thank you in advance and take your time love! ❤️

BEN Drowned NSWF alphabet!

➥ Ofc i will write it!! Here you go! Im so sorry that i kept you waiting so much...!

˚　　✦　　　. ˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚. 　　　✦　　˚

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Ben is definitely more on a chill side, he wont do very much but i would say that he still does a nice job. Usually the whole love-making ends up with you taking shower together, and just cuddling in bed with a drink of your choice. It is either this, or you playing in some video game (or you watch Ben do it while laying on him).

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Okay, Ben is totally a chest guy. Doesnt matter if you are male or female, small or big - boobs are boobs and he loves them. And he also loves thighs! Like you could just choke him with them and he would thank you... Loves grabbing them when you guys have sex. I should say something cute and lovey-dovey like he adores your eyes..well, they do lit up in pretty way when you are reaching your climax i guess??

Body part that he loves the most would propably be his hands? They are..just pretty, okay? A bit veiny with slender fingers, the perfect to reach every place on your body!..Plus holding hands during sex!!

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Ben love to either cum inside you or on your belly/ back - depends what position are you in (with your consent ofc). There is something about watching you so messy and dirty just becasue of him!

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Ben is 100% a panty thief, he either steals them from laundry basket or from your drawer. What he do with them? Jerking off obviously..

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

I see Ben as someone not really experienced. High possibility that he isnt a virgin, but he definitely takes all his knowledge from porn. Because of that his knowledge isnt the best and he may act suprised that things doesnt works the way they do in porn. But Ben is eager to learn! So no worries, you bothwill be satisfied!

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Pretty basic, but positions like missionary, doggie style or cowgirl/cowboy keeps him going and he finds it the most comfy.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Humorous! Im not saying sex with him isnt romantic, but im sure you guys both giggle a lot during it! He dont tell you jokes or anything, but he sometimes can say such a dumb thing that you just cant help but laugh. Awkwardness with Ben doesnt exist, he will make it all better and make a fool of himself just so you wont be stressed!

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Carpet does match the drapes, blond yet a bit more dark than his hair (on his head). He is either well groomed, or he has a full blush. Will make it clean if you ask him tho! Ben himself doesnt have preferences when it comes to you.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

There is intimacy, just on this weird way! Like yes, you both giggle a lot but its all from love! He definitely says "i love you" a lot, but isnt the type of guy to scatter the roses and lit candles in the room.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

He did jerked off a lot, at least once per day, before he met you. But after he get into relationship with you, he does it way less - its either if you are not around for a long time or you dont want to have sex with him at the moment.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

I think he would be into praise kink, call him good boy and tell him how a good job he did and he is all weak. Also mirror kink and he has a thing for recording your both acts - not like you both will show it to anybody, but there is some kind of arousal in it. Ben also loves creampies! He feels so proud of himself that he made you feel so stuffed, and just watching his cum leaking from you make him feel something.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

Mostly his/your room and bed, its the most comfortable for you both and you have the privacy. But! He wouldnt be opposite to do it in aome more risky place.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Oh man, what doesnt turn him on? You could do anything and he still finds you attractive and sexy, no matter how you look at this moment. But mostly you wearing his clothes, teasing him and flirting with him or just light touches on his body (yk, the one that are supposed to be innocent but they arent). Ben also loves to receive nudes from you and not nude photos (in underwear and stuff).

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Hurt you or do something that you dont want to do. Sex should be for the both of you, not only one-sided.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Ben doesnt mind giving, you would be suprised how good at it he is! He is great at using his mouth and his fingers, and no matter if he is deep inside you with his tongue or if you are deep inside him you always feel good.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

More on slow and sensual side, but its becasue of his laziness. When he is extremaly horny tho, he will be faster, but nothing too much.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Quickies are pretty often, usually when you both are in rush but want eachother really badly. And Ben loves them, not as much as proper sex but still. He enjoyes the rush and the adrenaline.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Ben is willing to take a risk, he is kinda unexperienced so he is eager to try anything you want to try.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

One round and he needs to take a break, yet he can last pretty long. But if you havent came, then he will gladly use his hands or mouth to help you.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

I believe Ben would own toys, just basic things like dildo or vibrator and often use it during masturbation. Maybe so a fleshlight?? He will gladly use them on you, and will be happy if you do the same for him during the whole love making.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Ben is a huge tease, both with his words and actions. He definitely will make you all horny for him, and then just leave you be until you wont beg him to touch you. When you are close to cumming, he just straightly pulls out and mock you. And when he is a bottom, such a brat he is, doesnt listem to anything you say!

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Ben is really LOUD. There is literally every possible sound coming from his mouth, whimpering, growling moaning..you name it!

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

You will hate me for that so much but he seems like type of person to have one of dakimakuras with his waifu or something and using it for not tasty purpouse (humping ofc)

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Around 6inches (15cm) and his dick is definitely more on a width side, nothing too abnormal but widther than average. He has couple of veins, dick curved upward and Ben has very sensitive balls..!

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

HUGE. Its easier to tell when he is not horny rather than when he is. If you will want to have sex with him, then he mostly feels the same!

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

If the sex was during night hours, he would fall asleep pretty quickly - yet he still would fall asleep cuddling to you closely. He always want to wait until you will fall asleep, but he does that way more quickly.

[lostinvasileios]

im sorry if i sound insecure or something but have you ever been in a place where you couldnt explain your relationship or practice to people that much because you dont have the words for it? like i want to tell someone about how much i love my deities but i cant really describe anything about why i do or something without feeling sort of stupid because i cant phrase it right, does that make sense? im sorry if thats hard to understand

Greetings, love bee!! ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚. Thank you for sending in your ask. 💛🌷

So, yes, actually. I have. I actually still feel that way. In my own journey, that's been a feeling I've had pretty much the entire time. My emotions always felt so much more profound than my vocabulary could keep up with. No matter how many big and beautiful words I found, they never truly could capture the essence of it and I hated that for so long when I was beginning. Having urges to share the beauty you've gone through or whatever is normal during practicing.

But… That's not a bad thing, bee. As I've come to learn, that - only makes it more special. I get it can be annoying, but you don't owe anybody an explanation to anything about your path or things relating to it.

A thing I had to learn pretty quickly (like 6-7 months into my practice) was that... Your path isn't really... Meant to be understood by anybody else other than you. I mean, this is what mine is like at least. I can't truly immerse anyone into what my life is like or has been like with my deities, because they won't be able to remember it the way I can. They can't feel the exact, or most likely even similar, emotions I did - in the way I did - because... It didn't happen for them. My deities said that to me, they showed that to me, they did this and that for/to me. Just as, their deities did that for them and they got to experience things I did not and probably won't.

Now, there are of course times where I or you will find others who can relate on certain levels, swap stories and see the similarities, and so forth. However, you two can give each other as many details as you can muster and as basically humanly possible, but - at the end of the day... That experience is yours alone. Their experience, is theirs alone.

And that's - beautiful to me, honestly.

It really helps me realize just how - unique... How truly special this all is. There are details about my practice that nobody besides me and my deities will ever understand, and though I sometimes wish to share them with others - some things are simply meant to stay with the experiencer & those involved within the experience. Some things are just either not going to be well received, well understood, well liked, ect. Some things are just - safer with you and your deities. Which is why the saying "keep the personal details to yourself" exists within witchy communities.

Another thing is that languages as a whole can be very limiting even with all the beautiful words that you can find. Grammar rules too. Me and my deities often break things like language or grammar to better communicate, because - we understand each other. The meaning behind our made up words or complex grammar style, almost like our own language. You can try to mix up your own way of telling someone about your deities and the bond you have, the knowledge you've gained and the experiences or theories you have gotten over the time you've practiced, but, it might be confusing. And more than often, if someone is confused, they can get angry. They can begin to invalidate you. Ect.

But, at the same time, you're also entitled to speak about it even if little to nobody understands it. You're allowed to be confusing and make language whatever you need it to be to get your point across and satisfy those desires to share. If you want to, nobody's really stopping you. And, you might just meet someone who can understand certain extents, or be similar to you. That in itself is kind of why we even have religion or the knowledge of deities in the first place. Because someone went out and preached it, someone brave went and documented it for others to learn.

I think I yapped a bit here, sorry about that, bee, lol. Hopefully I made some form of sense here. Enjoy your path and may no evil follow you, loveling! 🤍🤍

[plutoons]

Can you do a tutorial on how your art process is done I’m about to quit on Art everything I make fucking sucks .

hey anon !! My art process is almost non existent cause i haven’t been able to stick to One definitive way and i don’t want to cause i think its limiting. I still have a long way to go for improving my skills and learning new things and figuring out different styles !!

Heres a quickk drawing showing what my “main” process is

This is something i generally have stuck to for most of my posted drawings (i can post things specific to some drawings on a separate reblog ^^ im just to lazy to get pictures of em for examples rn)

Doodle !! I cant visualize shit, and usually have a very vague idea of what id like to draw Or just nothing at all. So I doodle messily with expressive gestures till’ i find something that sticks

choose one final concept/sketch and clean it up a lil so i have a way better idea of what im getting myself into

Base colors cause i hate doing lineart. So i just go straight into colors casue its fun and i like fun!! Right on top or on a diff layer it doesnt matter. I color pick with my eyes and put base colors or anything i think it would be cool. No pressure and it can messy cause I’ll clean it up and figure shit out later

fuck around and find out (rendering ig)—> i cant explain it super well or definitively. I just layer and throw colors on top till im satisfied or Done with it. I flip my canvas a bunch or check my values to make sure the results come out to look more coherent regardless of the mess of color

Im just a simple person and cant handle something that requires too many steps or things that havta be done Just right so this works for me atm. This may not be your jam but finding a process in that works for you through trial an error is just a part of art. Do what works for you!! I think experimenting is so important even if it sucks in the end

(more Words / “advice ?” under cut)

I have so many shitty drawings and sketches and even colored things that outweigh the tiny bits of art i decide to show off

I totally get that creating art can get really discouraging at times; not getting the results you want when you want them no matter how much effort you put in just sucks, but it won’t always be that way :] even if it takes you 10 years to find your groove and see improvement or 2 years, it’ll happen. I find that i’ve only improved when i actively didn’t give a fuck about how my art looks and only cared that i was having fun through it all, and thats hard cause perfectionism is a bitch and its hard to get rid of. You could improve with studies and daily practice for sure but moving towards improvement can be as fun and light n breezy as you want to make it, like taking a break to explore different hobbies or changing up mediums or fucking around and experimenting with it can help !!! Allow ur art to be bad; cause fuck it, at least you made something and thats really really cool. Once you cut urself some slack it’ll be easier to improve upon your skillset and slowly but surely get to where you want

Sorry im a bit tired idk if this is coherent so heres a more direct thing i’d like to say:

Maybe ur art isn’t where you want it to be rn and ik it can kill ur motivation to keep going at it (i’ve experienced this feeling a lot and im sure so have many others). But you gotta ease up on urself and stop worrying about results so you can allow yourself to experiment and have fun!! And its hard getting into that mindset but you gotta keep trying and you’ll find it getting easier

[etherealspacejelly]

ERM

ok so

anonymous bc no way am i showing my url on this Jhshsheheh

so like all my friends at school. they seem. so much more mature than i am???

like even the ones who are younger than me. they're already thinking about partners. and dating n stuff. like some of my friends already have partners

but i. just am not interested in that rn??? and sometimes i feel like there's. something Wrong with me. yk

like im year 9 but. i feel like i should be thinking about this and it feels like im not mature enough that i don't want to worry abt that now

- 🐉

there is nothing wrong with you. listen to me. there is absolutely Nothing wrong with you.

it is perfectly normal to not be interested in romantic relationships, i wasnt at your age and im still not. i am in a platonic relationship with my best friend, mostly because it comforts us both to know that no matter what happens we will not be alone. even if all of our other friends get into romantic relationships and prioritise them over friendships

desiring a romantic partner does not make you more mature than anyone else. having a romantic partner or a partner of any kind is not a requirement for happiness, fulfilment, or maturity.

focus on what You actually want. ask yourself what would make You happy, what would make you feel fulfilled and satisfied with your life. set aside these notions of what we are Supposed to want, of what it is ""Normal"" to want, and focus your attention on yourself. this is your life, and you owe it to yourself to follow your own path.

i think it would help you to research aspec identities, especially aromantic ones, and talk to aromantic people about their experiences. you might not be aromantic! alloromantic people can still have no desire to be in romantic relationships, and that is perfectly fine and normal. and likewise aromantic and arospec people can want to be in romantic relationships despite their lack of romantic attraction. what i think researching this community will do for you is show you that romance is not the be all and end all of human beings. it is not a requirement for existing and being happy.

i think even progressive parents can fall into this trap of telling their kids "when you grow up and get a girlfriend or a boyfriend" or "when you get married to your spouse", and like, yea its great that they arent assuming you will be straight, but they are still placing the expectation on you to Want a romantic relationship and that you will have one no matter what. and that doesnt have to be the case!

your "happily ever after" does Not have to involve riding off into the sunset with your One True Love, it can in fact be a freezeframe of you and your best friends jumping into the air together and pulling silly faces!

idk this is. a long and rambling answer to what was a fairly simple question but. this ask hit me very close to home. i know how you feel. i felt Exactly the same way when i was your age. i felt wrong and broken and different and i didnt understand Why everyone was so excited about dating and kissing and relationships. so. im telling you what i wish someone would have told me.

take a deep breath. and let go. you dont need to have it all figured out Right Now. you can in fact just enjoy life as it happens! you dont have to know exactly what you want at this age. you can figure it out as you go. you have So Much Life ahead of you to learn and grow make mistakes and change your mind and figure things out and just. live.

the world wont end if you never want a romantic relationship. life will go on. you will find out what Really matters to you. and thats the beauty of being alive! please do not force yourself to do anything you dont Really want to do, just because thats what it feels like you're Supposed to do.

you are unique and beautiful and so so alive. you are doing just fine, and im so proud of you. you belong here.

you are loved.

[psi-hate]

diana, this might sound like a weird question, but how do you draw boobs/gock/vaginas and anatomy in general? i wanna improve my art and you seem to have a lot of experience with it

-alice in anon because im embarrassed lol

hmm good question! im gonna be honest i don't really use references most the time, and i recommend you absolutely use references very often when drawing something you're not the most confident in.

for anatomy, it sorta comes down to me focusing on how other artists draw specific parts of anatomy and getting a good feel of how they generally look enough to know what looks wrong in my own attempt so i can continue adjusting it. it's a shitty bruteforce method but for me i sorta just osmosis it from exposure. in general i have a decently trained eye in 3d space on account of my 3D modeling experience, so coming up with shapes at particular angles is a little less of a headache i imagine some others would deal with at my skill level. i still struggle with posing which is something i really gotta practice more. i know it'd be faster if i used references for practice but my art process is a bit too casual out of stubborness... but i will do what i can to improve my workflow at some point!

regarding stuff like sexual anatomy or what have you, i actually pull up a few different artist's works, specifically those who draw shapes i find most appealing, and apply their concepts to my own attempt. it's sorta hit or miss atm, i'm still very new to drawing sexual anatomy. at the very least, i try and draw bodies as they are. what i mean is, a chubbier body is going to have more pockets of fat pulling some parts down, and comparing with my own body and those whom i've been with, i just try and capture the practical "flaws" and do my best not to polish them out of the equation. sunken eyes, messy hair, folds of skin, muscle definition, wrinkles, hair, etc it's all very pretty and more than anything i want to appreciate those bodies.

use references, look at your own body and try and plan out angles and poses before you get too deep into the drawing! my biggest flaw at the moment is lack of forethought going into a piece which can make a lot of my art much more stiff because an idea i wanted occurs halfway through the drawing and retroactively adjusting things is just not gonna work and it'll look stilted. come up with your idea and sketch a very simple example so you know what you're aiming for the entire time instead of me who habitually draws heads and facial features long before deciding how i want the rest of the body, usually locking me into the same perspective and angle as always lol. i have been fixing this most of the time now and i hope that is more apparent in some of my recent works.

sorta just rambling, but yeah! the most simple way for me to tl;dr this is that i recommend using irl examples for references for poses or how particular pieces of the body are structured in 3D space, and looking at other's art for ideas or inspiration, reverse engineer their process and practice it until you feel satisfied it makes sense in the context of your drawing. take special attention of smaller details of the body and don't be afraid of making something look "unappealing" if you want to portray a specific feature. you might not draw something the way that looks good to you, but the most important thing is learning what it is that does look good in your opinion, and reviewing what you could do to help draw more like that.

i'm really sorry if this is far too convoluted and not great advice, i'm the literal embodiment of "fake it till you make it" and any skill i've learned is simply because i am stubborn and bruteforcing it till i accomplished whatever it is that i wanted. for someone who is more interested in learning and improving the "right way", i tried to offer some more rational strategies to what i do in hopes that it makes sense in helping better lol. hope this helps!

[okkottsus]

I love reading your analysis of Nagireo!

One thing I was wondering, what do you think of Nagi (foreshadowed) future slump?

I feel like things will get dire for him, and I can't help but wonder how Reo would react.

Nagi feels very... emotionally immature and while Reo can be very fiery and we saw how emotional he can get, he's the one that feels more in touch with his own emotions and has better life experience.

For better or worse, being away from Reo forced Nagi to confront his own feelings more.

I wonder if Reo won't realize they got back together too early and leave him (this time maybe more amicably? Or maybe force himself to leave him) for his own sake.

Ego's dialog feels very ominous... they were very happy in that moment but there is a very sense of "now what?".

thank u so much, i feel like i never express myself well enough esp with characters and relationships im passionate abt so that means a lot 🥺

yeah i get what u mean about nagi's emotional immaturity...in the latest match, when isagi asked him how he was able to make his best play yet a reality, nagi  didnt really understand what had happened. he only wanted to beat isagi, that has been his first goal, the first step to achieve the bigger dream he shares with reo. 

and while he himself couldnt see that, reo was the first to notice despite everything that happened between them, so he created a chance for him to have a 1v1 with isagi. 

the problem is that, as isagi points out later, if u dont understand how u made something happen, you probably wont be able to be consistent and replicate it (this has been a recurring theme of blk since the start of the manga):

a goal that u only made happen because u had the person who knows u the best and is your closest friend give you exactly what you need in the moment, has little value in the grand scheme of things. Without a clear goal and reo’s help, nagi wouldnt have been able to do something like that. 

So the next step he should be taking is working on his weapons, instead of relying on the perfect opportunities reo can provide him with.

maybe its time for nagi to try and catch up to reo, and not only in terms of play-making 

but also in terms of self awareness 

i also love the fact that while reo can seem completely selfless when he declares this, he is also completely selfish, cause at the end of the day hes doing this for his dream, for himself. he loves playing with nagi and making him score goals, but his hard work which got him to where he is now doesnt rely on nagi being there, he hasnt abandoned himself in favor of nagi. 

BUT he still seems to always choose nagi over anyone when they are playing together and even though my shipping heart is tempted, i think thats not a good thing at all... cause their cooperation may be top class, but it also makes them predictable after a while. 

reo has learnt to play without nagi, but he needs to learn how play with nagi without forgetting everyone else on his team. 

so the way i see it, reo has made more significant progress than nagi, but he still needs to work on seeing the bigger picture when nagi is by his side.

nagi on the other hand has even more things he needs to work on. he shouldnt feel reassured bc of that one (miracle) goal or bc he managed to beat isagi once. if he ended up satisfied with just that, then he wouldnt belong in the world of professional players

Ego is right when he said that confidence and delusion are 2 different things. Nagi needs the power that will enable him to fight alone in any situation and to obtain that power, he has to confront his feelings, his weapons and his shortcomings. and that demands soul searching, practice and a lot of thinking, all things i bet nagi thinks are a pain pftt.

but i want to be optimistic and think of this as another challenge he (actually, both of them) will have to conquer. im very conflicted though, cause the way i see it, what reo needs to work on now requires them to be on the same team, while what nagi needs to work on requires alone time.

in conclusion, things may have worked out between them in terms of understanding each other, but im hoping they start understanding themselves more; acknowledging their weaknesses and taking the necessary measures to overcome them. 

i do think that reo the way he is now is more likely to realise what needs to be done than nagi, whose issues are the most urgent in my opinion. so i can def see them going their separate ways for a while again, whether its reo making that decision, or nagi, or both of them together (with the latter being the ideal for me).

[biscaanii]

I wanted to start off by saying, I love your work. I finished Achilles Come Down months ago and can’t stop re-reading.

I know this is probably a silly question to ask but how did you learn how to write so well? You’re writing so beautiful and I would love any tips. ( If you would like to share of course)

Thank you

Hi! Aw, thank you. Im glad you like it :)

Short answer: write and read a lot. Like a loooot.

Long answer: I grew up reading as a kid to the point my mom would unscrew the lightbulb in my closet because she'd catch me reading late at night in it. It was my main hobby, so I learned a lot of literary basics really young just by the principle of seeing them in action a lot. I discovered fanon spaces around 6th grade, which was when I started to write actual stories, so what you're looking at is pretty much the process of 11 years of experience.

The best advice I can give you is just write. Put down any idea you want to see regardless of if it's long or short. I learned because I did, you know? The main reason I was able to finish Achilles when I was 18 was because the year prior during lockdown, I'd tried writing a 100k long fic for the first time that to this day is still a fucking mess. It was a forever failure, yeah, but it also taught me all the skills I needed to actually finish my next long fic- Achilles. (And Redemption).

In my opinion, getting really good at writing is really just getting good at understanding your specific quirks. Off the top of my head example, but I write in present tense pretty much exclusively, because it's the same as my natural flow of thought. Trying to write in past participle or past present is difficult for me to do in large or quick quantities because it misaligns to how I'm thinking in the moment. Figure out what kind of language you like to use- prose? Quick and to the point? Some weird in between? Do you like to over-use dialogue tags? Under-use them? What do you like to write about? Who do you like to write about? Are you exploring a character's emotional arc, a physical arc, something else? These types of question are what will guide your story because they're the foundation of why and how your story is happening, and through what means it will happen. Are you writing a romance or a thriller? What will give the reader a better picture, the internal thoughts of a character or the external imagery of their enviornment/actions? What's most important to the story's resolution? To the character's resolution? What will make this story satisfying? How can you tie all your plotlines together to reach a consistent and sensible conclusion?

And most importantly, what do you specifically want to get out of your writing? If you're only writing so others can validate your work, it'll be more difficult to continue writing if you've got low engagement. Also, cringe is dead. It's stupid to feel self-concious about anything you're writing, because that feeling will hold you back. Write whatever ideas you want because you want to see them, not necessarily because others will read it and judge you. It's not like you ever have to show it to anyone.

I write what I want, when I want, and how I want it. It's 100% self-indulgent and because of that, I'm writing mainly to read it back to myself, which makes it fun because I'm getting exactly what I want to see out of the story both as it forms and then once it's put to paper. I'm also a total anomaly though because my only hobby is writing, so my weekends are pretty much spent sat on google docs from like, morning until midnight. The fact that I've churned out three long fics so quickly is an outlier and should not be counted because im a gremlin with nothing else to do.

[updownlately]

okay so bear with me here, but i just wanted to lay my personal opinion down on this because other opinions have been expressed regarding this and i didn't really say my piece on this specific part yet.

im not trying to drag lj down here, or bring this back up for her to be dragged. i just want to state my piece here in regards to the conversations we've been having since last night.

regarding the conversations that have been occurring on this blog in the past 24 hours about lj and katie's behaviour, and with lj's wc behaviour being brought up, i said that (and i quote) "the lack of apology irked me the most! that and how the attention was directed to racial abuse." and "the fact that such a key issue wasn’t even touched upon is frankly extremely disappointing from the lionesses, chelsea, and lj herself."

i honestly still stand firm in my stance and here is why.

***adding a cut bc this shit got kinda long

i've attached the two main apologies i've found, one from the lionesses, and one from lj (her tweet).

the reason that i personally am not satisfied with the response and why i said lack of apology, is because i feel that the words said were not enough. yes sorry was said. yes, it mentioned the actions and remorse that lj felt. but for me, 'really sorry' doesn't cut it. that combined with 'wholly out of character for her' doesn't sit right with me.

we know this isn't out of character. and personally, actions speak louder than words, and the immediate walk out without a single change in facial expression when the incident originally occurred + every. single. time. it has occurred since is insane. this isn't a one time behaviour. being 'really sorry' doesn't cut it. yes you can respect another player and whatnot, but if you're going to let your emotions consistently negatively dictate how you treat them on the pitch, and it being with anything other than respect, that is where i don't see the apology being more than pixels on a screen meant to placate the (rightfully) enraged public.

could i see it a fit apology if action was taken to prevent this from happening again in the future? abso-freaking-lutely!!

but that's the issue for me. nothing has changed. literally nothing.

i caught part of the city vs chelsea game that occurred a few days ago, and as the clock got closer to the end, it was clear how each of lj's tackles and shoves got more and more dangerous. heck, she absolutely bodied a player in the air when it was unnecessary. that could've ended so poorly and im glad it didn't, but i digress.

i'm thinking of the walti incident because its the first that comes to mind as an arsenal fan. the clearly placed stomp. the indifferent look. the walkout without a single hesitation or look of remorse. that isn't the behaviour of someone who is sorry for their actions. that behaviour then isn't 'out of character'.

so then coming back to lj's apology. is she really sorry? or is she sorry it was caught? that too at such a big stage? and where was the attempt to 'learn from my experience'? because honestly? i don't see it.

and i don't doubt there's been more instances like this, ones that i haven't seen (i don't watch chelsea games that often, the timing of most wsl games isn't convenient for me since many occur from 4-7 am and i have commitments during the day). but they seem to be a reoccurring theme.

so yes. there was an apology issued. no i don't think it was a good apology in the least and the behavioural aspect wasn't touched upon. the incident was treated like a one off occurrence (which it clearly isn't).

this all gets furthered by the fact (and i can't rmb who so please forgive me and educate me here if possible), but it was either chelsea or the lionesses that released a statement about racial abuse.

now, i'm not disagreeing that racial abuse occurred, and im definitely not saying that it was okay.

it wasn't okay. racial abuse is never okay and never will have a space in the football that i know of (or anywhere for that matter). period. full stop.

and so yes, i agree with their statement. but to me, it felt as if the red card situation was brushed under the rug.

now, don't get me wrong. racial abuse is totally is extremely important and should be kept to a zero in any situation whatsoever and im glad there was a statement released regarding that matter.

but i recall that when i read that statement, i personally felt as if it was more of a deflection than a stance, and that is what didn't sit right with me.

now, i could totally be wrong there. i understand there's a innumerable amount of perspectives here. i'm merely going off my opinion and what i felt when reading that statement. everyone had a different experience/reaction to it and i can recognize and respect that. all i ask if you respect my take even if you don't agree with it.

(i've lost my train of thought so bear with me if it gets a bit murky here)

but yeah, for me, all of that combined really just made me feel that the apology wasn't adequate, given the severity of the situation.

don't get me wrong. i think lj's is a generational talent. i really do. her footwork, her body feints, her ability to score rockets and find pockets of space that barely exist for more than a second is absolutely insane!

but while i can recognize she's a fantastic player, i don't have to be satisfied with the apology she gave during those times. and i'm not.

is it a weird line to balance for me? 100%. it is something i think about quite often to be honest.

as someone who likes to say they have a concrete set of morals, ethics, values, and whatnot that i like to follow, this is tough for me to navigate. it's very much in the grey area and the lines do get blurred.

im astonished by lj's skill level, but i can't find it in myself to 'rep' her as a player like i do with my other favourites or players that i think are outstanding.

the behaviour doesn't sit right with me and it influences how i perceive her as a footballer and a person, and that's just the way it is.

so all in all, if you've made it this far: a) congrats on making it through my word vomit! thank you really. b) this is my personal take/opinion. all i ask is you try and understand where i may be coming from before you attack me, should you choose to do so. c) im a barely twenty-smt kid tryna navigate life. this is new territory for me, i'm not perfect and i know it. could i be absolutely wrong? yes. but does this stance feel correct to me right now? yes.

and yeah.

at the end of the day. no, that apology wasn't acceptable in my opinion. you can accept it should you choose to wish so, i just won't be. not yet atleast.

anyways, thanks for coming to my ted talk lmao

-blu