#I'm voting for Batman

[dinosaurwithablog]

UNMUTE!!!

I, totally, understand how Robin feels. I was shocked to learn that felons can run for president. This episode is so close to what's going on in politics today that is freaky. The Penguin, actually, refers to making Gotham City great again. I'd be laughing a lot more if this wasn't so close to the truth these days. Unbelievable 🤣🤣🤣😢😢 I'm voting for Batman.

[kettlefire]

Prepare for the unexpected. (DPxDC)

Everyone knew about the reign of Pariah Dark. Even those who did not dabble in those realms have heard the tale of the tyrant. A power-hungry man who ruled over the dead with an iron fist.

Following the rise of Pariah Dark, his realm had been effectively cut off from communication. Many mystics and magic users knew better than to open the door of nightmares that could arise if Pariah Dark's reach went further than his own realm.

Except, the universe had plans to bring the realm of the dead back into the cards.

A new opponent, one that had all of Earth's heroes scrambling for options. A being with powers of a god over weather, destruction was on the horizon. A world ending threat.

It's the only reason the Justice League was doing this. In a deep bunker, far from close civilization as a precaution, the heroes looked on with grim expressions.

The world was already being threatened. It would be destroyed regardless of what the league did. So it only made sense to make the last ditch effort. To summon someone strong enough to defeat the threat.

No one wanted to do it. No one wanted to be the one to pull the realm of the dead back to the living. The consequences were untold if this succeeded. If Pariah Dark was freed and defeated the threat, whose to say he won't want control?

That was a problem for later. For the aftermath. For now, the league could only watch on with bated breath as Constantine completely the summon ritual.

They watched on as the shadows in the room seemed to darken and grow. As the sigil sputtered to life with a glow that was growing increasingly brighter. A sudden gust of wind rushed through the room, the temperature began to drop with eaching ticking second.

And then it was all gone.

The room stood perfectly still. Just as it had been moments before. Nothing changed. No giant king standing before them, no sign that the ritual worked.

The room stood deadly still for another beat before the murmurs started. The team trying to make sense of the situation, figure out what went wrong.

Constantine swore up and down that this was the correct ritual, taking offense that they would even think the problem was on his end. It only made it better when it finally happened.

A loud sound ripped through the room, pulling everyone's attention back to the summoning circle. Just in time to see a tear appear in the space above the circle.

A thin tear that ran the length of eight feet. The fabric of the dimension seems to curl at the edges, pulling back to reveal a deep glowing swirl of greens. A dark gloved hand reached through, fingers curling around the edge of the tear, stretching it even further.

A portal. The ritual had worked, but there had been a delay. A delay that had every hero nerves on edge. Each team member tensed, weapons at the ready as they watched the being stretch the portal to the right size.

Then, a foot stepped out with a heavy thud. A dark boot that looked otherworldly despite its similarity to mortal clothing. A deep black that seemed never-ending. A second foot quickly followed before a full body emerged from the portal.

Not many people in the room have ever seen Pariah Dark, let alone know what to expect. Based on what Constantine and Zatara had said, this wasn't Pariah Dark.

A man had stepped out of the portal, standing at almost seven feet tall, and built like a brick house. One glance at the glowing white hair, deadly red eyes, and shard teeth was enough to know this being was not to be messed with.

But there was no giant show of armor or royal garbs. There is no large crown at the top of his head or jewelry from the infinite realms laced around his neck.

Instead, the man stood before them in combat boots, worn-in ripped jeans, a graphic t-shirt, and a spiked leather jacket. Despite his almost normal clothing choice, the man's jacket seemed to be a never-ending depth of the dark night sky. If one was to look closely enough, the cosmos could almost be made out in the sea of darkness.

None of that would have prepared them for when the man spoke. His tone sounded more bored than anything as he took a step forward.

"Oh, so now you need the help of the dead." The man had spoken, running a hand through his hair. When Batman took a step forward to speak, the man raised a hand. Immediately commanding silence in the single gesture. "I'm on babysitting duty and have yet to have a cup of coffee. I'll be right back."

Just like that, both the man and portal vanished into thin air. Leaving behind a group of stunned heroes. Not only was the man not Pariah Dark, but he was also supposedly babysitting.

"Did that just-"

The Flash had been the first voice to speak up, his eyes trained on where the man had once stood. Except he had barely made it through the first few words before the man was suddenly back.

The man that now had a child hanging off his shoulders and another teen being held up by his scruff. Unlike the man, these kids looked human.

Too human for Bruce's liking. The dark black hair and bright blue eyes had every heroes eyes flickering to Batman for just the briefest moment.

"This isn't fair! I'm not even the king. Why do I have to be here!" The teenager had been complaining the moment the man had reappeared. Arms crossed tight over his chest and seemingly used to being held dangling. "Besides, who brings kids to a show down! Wait til I tell mom about this."

"Aw, come on, Danny. This is gonna be fun!!" The younger girl seemed in much better spirits than the teen, Danny. She had climbed up the large man, sitting on his shoulders and resting her arms on the mess of glowing hair. "It's like take your kids to work day! Ooo, Dan! Can we fight too!?"

Unlike the two kids, the man looked purely exhausted and annoyed. The man, Dan, dropped Danny like a sack of potatoes as he took a long drink from the travel cup in his hand.

It didn't take a genius to recognize the look of an exhausted parent in Dan's expression. A look many of the league members were well acquainted to. A look that even had Batman grimacing with sympathy.

"Can it, little shits. You two were grounded, remember." Dan had growled at the kids before shifting his focus back on the team of heroes before them. His glowing eyes set in a deadly glare. "Pariah Dark isn't coming, and he never will. He's been dethroned and banished. We're the best you've got."

A summoning that started with a group of on edge and scared heroes looking for the ghost king, ended in a way no one expected.

No one was even sure if it made any sense. They weren't sure if they should feel hopeful or in despair.

Because truly, what was a ghostly man with two seemingly human children against a godlike foe with the control over the weather?

The unspoken question of power and ability seemed to vanish following Dan downing the metal travel cup of coffee, and crushing it in his fist.

He tossed it to the side, straighting up his posture as he looked over the heroes. Dan might not be a hero, but he's been playing family for too long.

An almost feral, bloodhungry grin spread across the man's face, sharp fangs on full display. The look made the man suddenly look even less human. He looked closer to a demon from the pits of hell rather than the exhausted parent he looked just a few seconds ago.

"Point me in the direction of this bastard. It's been too long since I let loose and had some fun."

[supermarvelgirl15]

Me to Jason the entire time I'm reading Death in the Family

[gotham-snark]

B&R 9 preview

[navree]

It's not like he slept much as a kid anyway; this is just a return to the status quo. He's not overly tired, and even if he's been sleeping less than his already limited amount throughout April, that's still not any of her business. Bad memories are already bad enough even before they spend the next few years in the aftermath becoming nightmares.

Fandom: Batman (All Media Types), DCU (Comics) Pairing(s): Talia al Ghul & Jason Todd, Jason Todd & Slade Wilson, Alfred Pennyworth & Jason Todd, Dick Grayson & Jason Todd, Barbara Gordon & Jason Todd, Jason Todd & Bruce Wayne Words: 5,618 Chapters: 1/1

[sigurism]

[phantomoftheparadise0002]

Doug human characters/cryptids smash/pass poll

[mybrainisoveractive]

Ahem ahem I present to you, not in any order, some words/phrases/ideas I associate with these fandoms (including things from fanfics & memes):

Percy Jackson- baby seal eyes

- Percy 'imma just insult the Gods' Jackson

- literally any demigod memes or/and water related memes (tho technically can be used for H2O)

Naruto- Sasugay

- that one drawing of Sasuke sitting with his fingers interlocked and just staring

-the bad timing pause effect on Sasuke (distorted body in an 'S' shape and arms in an inverted 'C' shape) with the caption 'I can see you! ' in a black box with the caption: S A S U K E he can see you'

White Collar - Neal NO!

- Mozzie making ridiculous theories

- crossover with Batman/DCU

Danny Phantom- little ghosty

- little baby man (LBM)

- literally anything green and/or glowy

- vivisection (AO3 tag)

- crossover with DCU/JLA/Batman

Merlin BBC (TV Show) - Arthur 'I must be lucky! ' Merlin 'hell no, that was me'

- clotpole (actually spelled 'clotpoll' outdated slang term for idiot/dolt)

- 'your Royal Pratness'

- Gay but Not Gay aka very very Close Platonic friends

- crossovers with Harry Potter (AO3)

Lout of the Count's Family (LCF) / Trash of the Count's Family (TCF) - Cale 'i want slacker life' , never really actually had the opportunity to Slack, half of which is his own fault

- Cale 'lemme just stab myself with a stick through my heart'

- ✨Misunderstandings✨

- 'cough cough.. oh shit there's blood'

The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System (SVSSS) - Shen 'I need to hug the thighs of the protagonist' Yuan

-Bingpup

- 'I can't be OOC!' That is Still OOC anyway

Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint - Self-insert Fanfic

- Kim 'im gonna sacrifice myself' Dokja/Kim 'im Yoo Joonghyuk' Dokja

- squid

- dumpling

- Sunfish

- regression

- existential crisis

- space time continuum

Jujutsu Kaisen (JJK) - death, death and dead

- Gojo aka the one with expensive eyes (and everyone simps for it)

Demon Slayer - Muzan 'he dies, she dies, everyone di- oh shit' Kibutsuji

Attack On Titans (AOT) - Eren 'im gonna kill all titans as revenge! But also..Like you know.. (✨becomes a titan✨)' Yeager

- Levi aka (also) the one everyone simps for (who is also a germophobe)

Case Closed (CC)/Detective Conan (DC) - teen ➡️ child

- teenchild blends in but still comes across murders and help solves it

- Teenchild also goes to teen-pretending-to-be-adult (dead dad)'s heist.

-Teenchild has crush on teen who is taking care of teenchild

- Teenchild is canonically called shinigami

Untitled Goose Game - a normal everyday murderous Goose

- 🪿 🔪

Batman- Furry Combat Brigade

- too many goddamn universes to keep up

- Bat 'i work alone' man/ Bat 'adoption problem' man

- alive ➡️ dead ➡️ alive

- Tim's lost spleen/ Tim Drake's Missing Spleen tag on AO3

Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) - war, war some more war

- Ironman vs captain America thingy

- wrinkled grape with stones

-Some time travel thing

-ironman with stones

Harry Potter - 'you are a wizard, Harry! ' 'you are a hairy wizard! "

- annual murder attempts

- 'did ya put ya name in da goblet of fire?!!?! ' Dumbledore asked calmly

My Hero Academia (MHA)/Boku no Hīrō Akademia (BNHA) - we do not talk about the ships, there are no ships sailing anywhere, not today, not in my mind, especially not the weird ones, please

- weird powers

-how did some students get in class 1-a?

-some people simping for Aizawa (his neck? I think)

- midnight's death 😔

- Aizawa's leg

- Hawk's... Everything(sad boi)

二哈和他的白貓師尊/The Husky and His White Cat Shizun/Erha (2ha)- sad backstory

- similar to SVSSS but sadder (probably cause of the different povs)

- love triangle (I think?)

Alex Rider - child spy

- Bombs✨

-quite a lot of dead people for a teen book

-child assassin

-pickpocket

Special mention(s):

-Hellblazer #247 (John Constantine)

-badly explaining all of omniscient reader in 6 minutes (YouTube vid by ferd) (if you want to know about orv without being spoiled but confused)

- So This is Basically My Hero Academia (YouTube vid by JelloApocalypse)

[dinosaurwithablog]

UNMUTE!!

BATMAN FOR PRESIDENT!!!

[welcometogrouchland]

I've decided I need to post at least some of my DC art backlog or I may actually explode and die

[grison-in-space]

Has Biden actually done anything at all? There's evidence going around and I think it's compelling, the alternate to voting is instead doing actual social work and participating in protests and organizing political action, which is a good idea i think

1) Yes. Inarguably this has been the most effective progressive domestic administration since I have been alive, and I'm in my thirties. What in the fuck are you talking about? It's not perfect, but it's better than we've seen in fifty years: Obama tried, but Democratic Congressional organization was just not yet used to working with a completely obstructionist GOP Congress in the wake of the tea party.

Even in terms of foreign policy, this is also pretty much as good as US involvement gets. Sorry. Our foreign policy has been shaped by monsters for decades, and that's even without dealing with our huge and active branch of Christian doom cultists. There ain't a candidate in the world that could stop the entire accumulated momentum of geopolitics with a snap of the finger, and I'm not really willing to pretend that Biden is particularly notable for not managing to fix Israel/Palestine relations.

2) In your own words, anon, what precisely does organizing political action entail without participating in the political process? Do you think that abstaining from the part of the gig where you, the citizen, get to say which official gets the job somehow makes your opinions matter more to your elected public officials? Have you ever organized to get so much as a municipal one-time library project budget expanded? Are you perhaps only skilled at political argument with people who already agree with you on the Internet?

What is your leverage, and could it reasonably be described as "extortion" or "blackmail" or "political corruption?" Because those are pretty much the only things on the table that can work more effectively to drive an elected official than a disciplined coalition of political allies (who can be purchased with, you guessed it, votes) or a reliable bloc of voter support. Your vote matters less than the ones you bring with you, sure. Do you think that not voting yourself somehow helps people organize to drive more votes? Have you perhaps replaced your complex reasoning skills with a rapidly dying jellyfish?

3) Holy passive vagueness, Batman! "Evidence is going around." What a masterpiece of a sentence! How it suggests everything while providing nothing! What evidence? Who collected it? Who is talking about the evidence "going around?" Who is listening? How many of them are there? What did they think before? The more I think, the more questions I have, and damn if they ain't predisposing me to be even less charitable.

Like, this is so catastrophically poorly supported that I have to confess that I not only believe this is probably an ask in bad faith (i.e. by someone who is expecting to piss me off or otherwise engage with me adversarially, probably spammed to a whole host of blogs at once with no expectation of response) but I actively hope that it is. The alternative is to have to grapple with the reality that some people are so uncomfortable with the responsibility of moral agency that they're willing to release useful levers of legal and social power just so that they never do anything problematic with that power. Much better, of course, to wash one's hands of anything that might have the stink of responsibility clinging to it. Might fall from the membership of the Elect if you actually get yourself all muddy by doing things, I reckon.

I don't even believe that voting is the only lever we have when it comes to our elected officials or that votes are necessary to secure change, and I am certainly not talking about the presidential ticket alone when I talk voting. What I do believe is two things: one, that voting is a potential lever of power on the emergent chaos of the society in which we live. And two, that anyone telling me to leave a lever of power on the ground without a damn good reason is either incompetent, malicious, or both.

[decolonize-the-everything]

Y'all remember that scene in Batman where joker is trying to prove how society is a cesspit of people willing to kill their neighbor just to save themselves by giving two separate ferries detonators that would bomb the other ferry? Remember how the Joker failed cuz neither ferry actually pushed the button? Not even the boat full of murderers was willing to push the detonator and kill people on the other ferry. So because neither pushed the button both ferries lived?

Liberals and white gays pushed it. And when they see our funerals and statistics they say they didn't have a choice. They had to kill someone else. They had to choose themselves. Or else it would've been them.

And I'm tired of pretending I understand the selfishness of it cuz it makes them feel better. Cuz I don't.

I don't get how you all can sleep at night after a day of defending votes that costs lives, war crimes, genocidal warmongers, and insisting that the lives of brown and black people overseas need to be traded so you don't have to take any actual action besides voting to stop the deep corruption you allowed to be sowed into your government that threats your livelihood if you don't (whether those black and brown people die or not btw).

You're cowards and truly the worst things breathing and I wanted to make this post so you don't die without knowing you'll never be more than that (to me or history).

[15minlatewithbatbucks]

One of the bats has to go undercover as a patient of a particularly suspect new and upcoming therapist. Bruce already has a backstory fleshed out and a cover identity, but that's no fun now is it.

Dick: Okay, the bat council is now in session. First things first-

Steph: I'm the realest.

Jason: Shut the fuck up.

Dick: No, no arguing. We're here on a MISSION.

Tim: That's right, a very important mission.

Dick: One of us has to go undercover as Dr. Hoffman's patient. But why? Why are we seeking therapy?

Tim: Wrong answers only. If any of you get too real, Dick can and will find you a real therapist.

Dick: And Tim, no superhero related answers. Bernard's PowerPoint nights give you too much of an advantage.

Tim: You're just jealous I know that Batman is actually a tulpa.

Jason: You shut the fuck up too.

---

Dick: Okay, I'll go first to get the obvious answer out of the way. I'm going because I'm secretly Batman, BUT I'm not here about that. I just have incredibly selective amnesia and can't remember the code to the Batmobile.

Jason: Oh that one's good. Let me think.

Steph: Hoffman is a man, right?

Dick: Right.

Steph: Easy, I'll claim womanly problems. Maybe get prescribed a vibrator.

Tim: *wheezes*

Dick: Ok Gotham's in the dark ages of psychology but not THAT much.

Steph: Spoilsport. Fine, I'm Batman's long lost twin sister.

Duke: Come on, we can't all go to therapy because of Batman.

Jason: I don't know, I feel like all of us should go to therapy because of Batman.

Cass: I'll go because I'm Batman.

Jason: I'd vote for you.

Duke: I think I would go because Metropolis isn't real.

Tim: Like, the whole city is-

Duke: It's a conspiracy. The government wants us to think there's this wonderful city where nothing bad ever happens and an actual alien from space saves the day. Tries to make us buy into some utopian bullshit.

Tim: Hoffman's just going to drive you there.

Duke: Ha! He's not getting ME to a secondary location. He might be in on it.

Steph: Compelling, definitely compelling. I nominate Duke's for first place.

Jason: Don't jump the gun.

Tim: Yeah, you haven't heard ours.

Steph: Well? Let's hear it then.

Tim: I'm an alien spy, sent here to study humans. Only I'm not doing well because I was taken in by rich people and they act weirder than me. I want to know what it means to be human, but whenever I look around all I see is how to make a good margarita. It makes me... sad.

Steph: That's no good. We said wrong answers only.

Jason: Solid four out of ten.

Tim: Fuck off.

Jason: I think I would go because I was convinced I was the second coming of Jesus which is all fine and good, but my whole family is Jewish so it's making things a little awkward at the dinner table.

Steph: You did come back from the dead.

Jason: I did and I'll tell him that. Took a little longer than three days this time, though.

Tim: Okay, I'll be honest. Jason and Duke's are the best.

Dick: Hold on- Damian, do you have an answer?

Damian: Of course. And not one so foolish.

Duke: Well?

Damian: Well, my whole family is comprised of vigilantes and I'm under a lot of stress to be one as well and continue the family tradition. I will of course swear him to secrecy and avoid naming any vigilantes by name.

Dick: ...

Jason: This is what I'm talking about. This is exactly what I'm-

Dick: Yes, okay. Game's over. All of you are getting psych referrals in your inbox by the morning.

Steph: What about-

Dick: Duke won.

[youngbounty]

Not Letting DamiJon Lose!

I'm not letting the DamiJon Nation lose without a fight, so here is my promo. Why vote DamiJon?

Childhood

These two practically grew up together as the Super Sons. They are each other's closest companions. Jon was the only person that stuck by Damian when no one else did. Even when Damian was about to kill KG Beast, Jon never turned against him. He was the only person that truly reached out to him just to make sure Damian was okay.

After this incident, Jon left the Legion of Super Heroes, hinting at the possibility that he sacrificed his membership for his friend. It could be for other reasons, but considering Saturn Girl kicked Damian out upon his arrival, I'd like to believe the Legion wasn't too fond of him.

2. "I know the sound of your heartbeat"

Even in the very comic where Jon Kent starts dating Jay, it's clear which boy he's much closer with. How can you not see sparks? These two were clearly made for each other both heart and soul!

3. Babysitting Lizzie

These two practically co-parent Lizzie Prince, the daughter of Wonder Woman in Tom King's run, from when she's five until she became the next Wonder Woman. They are still just as close and never change by the time Damian becomes Batman.

4. Even in Other Worlds

When Jon visits the Injustice Earth, he never gives up on Damian. No matter how evil Damian may become, Jon will always see the good in him. There is such a deep understanding these two have for each other.

5. The Promise

The one promise they made was to always protect each other. Damian was so genuine in that promise that he took off his mask. He hardly ever does this, even when making promises. It's clear Damian cares so much for Jon that he will abandon the Teen Titans to protect him.

Even going back to "I know the sound of your heartbeat," Jon said this when Damian was off the grid. This means Jon was the only nonparticipant of the Lazarus Tournament who knew where Damian was when he was off the grid. He's also the only person Damian has ever visited while off-grid, being that is when the Super Sons Special takes place.

6. This right here.

Also...

And...

So, let's get some votes for DamiJon. Co'mon, don't let DickBru catch up! Let's so our love! Vote here for DamiJon!

https://www.tumblr.com/ao3-top-batfam-ships-bracket/755738460459089921/top-ao3-batfamily-ships-bracket-round-6

[radioactive-earthshine]

Hmm. Been a tough week in the world of fanfic. I'm curious.

No, not all options are available. This is asking which of the available above options irritates you the most, not which fanon concept overall is the worst to you. No nuance or "all of the above" button, you just have to choose or elect not to vote.

If none of these bother you then 🤷‍♀️ maybe this isn't the poll for you, keep scrolling.